questions OF PROFITABLE AND PLEASANT CONCERN, TALked of by two old Seniors, the one an ancient retired Gentleman, the other a middling or new upstart frankeling, under an Oak in Kenelworth Park, where they were met by an accident to defend the parching heat of a hot day, in grass or Buck-hunting time called by the reporter the Display of vain life, together with a Panacea or suppling plaster to cure if it were possible, the principal diseases wherewith this present time is especially vexed.   printer's device of Richard Field ANCHORA SPEI 
LONDON Printed by Richard Field, dwelling in the Blackfriers by Ludgate. 1594.   

TO THE RIGHT HONOURABLE ROBERT DEVORAX, EARL OF ESSEX AND Ewe, Viscount of Hereford, Lord Ferrer of Chartley, Borchier and Louvain, Master of the Queen's majesties horse, Knight of the noble order of the Garter, and one of her majesties honourable privy Counsel. Your honours most bounden O. B. wisheth long and happy life, with increase of honours.  
RIght honourable, having found this book of profitable concernings and pleasant delights, collected by the diligence of some one, who it should seem over heard the matters, at such times as they were talked under an Oak in the park at Kenelworth, some few years past: I thought it my duty, meeting with the substance thereof, to dedicate them unto such a principal worthy as your honours self, who have always hitherto been found flourishing and budding forth to all virtues, in such forward sort, so as the world hath conceived an undoubted hope, you will always hold green and lasting in the increase of them, without suffering any rottenness or corruption of vices at any time to approach you. Further, because the principal subject of matter herein contained setteth out the notableness of such former worthies, as have through the perfection of virtues absolute in themselves, delivered successively the fullness thereof over unto their posterity, it could not but mean your worthy self, especially when I called to mind the example of your honourable father deceased, who in his life time ataining to the type of virtues worthily acquired, through the full & entire possession of them, was no doubt in himself sufficiently able to deliver them over as peculiar & proper blessings to his worthy offspring, so that now they are found no less excellent & effectual virtues in yourself & the rest of his succeeding children, them they were in his antecedent self. Withal I most humbly beseech your honour, not to think I presume hereby to add any forces to your strong virtues, which are already sufficiently known and magnified, even of them that are best able and most worthy to judge: but rather being privy to my own unworthinesses, only desire to show, that there neither is, nor hereafter shall be, any ability to do duty hidden in me, which for lack of diligence I would leave unperformed: Neither go I about to think that it is possible for me to express that which belongeth to the due desert of your incomparable virtues. A matter also superfluous for me to do, considering that even as the shadow followeth the body, so glory and renown associateth the excellent parts of noble and well deserving men. The principal thing right honourable that I had herein to regard, was that the matter might fall out fit and beseeming the dignity of your worthy self, whom I have been bold to choose as patron to present the argument of this book unto: wherein I confess I have not so thoroughly observed my charge neither, but have wittingly faulted therein also, foreknowing as I do, that your honour can spare no hours from the utility of commonwealths matters, to bestow so much as one look upon the unworthiness hereof. Yet for their sakes, who undoubtedly if they will, may reap benefit hereby, I have made bold to hope your honour will vouchsafe to enable it, wherein you may according to the words of the Gospel having enough yourself, receive at my unworthy hands that also, whereof you have no need. If your honour for their sakes vouchsafe to agnize my dutiful endeavours, it will prove such a sufficient rejoicing unto me, as shall bind me for your so great favour and pardon, daily to pray for your honour's increase and growth up to all the happinesses your heart can wish. Beseeching almighty God further, that as mighty Gedeon received strength and furnishings, of all necessary aids and means to prevail and overcome his enemies the Madianites, at the time of his faithful serving and calling upon God under an Oak in Ephah. Even so under the service and command of our gracious and never fading green Oak, planted and watered by the hand of God, to be the shelter of us all under her favourable aids, your honour, together with such other worthies, tried and approved partakers in all adventures, may bring under the enemies to God and our Christian peace: so that in the end also, God blessing your labours, you may build up an altar of peace for the behoof of this land, as Gedeon did under his Oak, which he called jehovah Salome, the God of peace.  
Yours honours most bounden, O. B.   

THE EPISTLE TO THE READER.  
SIthence the world is become so stomack-fallen to abhor all meats, I have thought good to commend unto the sa●…, this Panacea or supl●…g plaster, to cure if it were possible all diseases. The drench you may imagine to be made by the pythagorians Academics, Peripatetics, Epicureans and the rest, wherein if the curious vain of every appetite be not fitted, yet the assay and taste thereof cannot hurt, because the entire and whole thing which should have brought loathsomeness with it, is not at all offered here. The Authors of this medi●…e, fearing that if they should have filled up their speeches with copious words, to every satisfying, through it mellow ripeness, it would have died at the first revealing, as many other more worthy and better approved things have done. Avoiding also by continual process all tediousness, through which they should have been cumbersome to themselves, tiring in like manner others with an entire thing, have therefore taken the way, briefly to cut off all copious speaking, lest the matter should have proceeded more infinitely, than either their leisure or the matter required: contenting one another with the bare sense of things, on purpose to continue life in the matter, knowing it notwithstanding to be subject to withering as all other things are. Abhorring beside, as it should seem to argue any thing to a trial through painted guile or supportation of Arte. Now howsoever the matter frameth, I may hope not to purchase the grudge or envy of any, meddling not at all therein farther then may beseem the uprightness of a reporter: yet therein also as becometh me, entreat the readers especially Gentlemen and the better sort, in whom there is always to be found humanity and moderation, not to interpret things to the worst, but rather to pardon faults which all men are subject unto: to whom I commit the correction of myself, so far as I have offended, if they may please to vouchsafe the pains, knowing that they will at the least allow me as great a liberty to confess my own ignorance, as to justify other men's knowledges. Now for the envious and ignorant, I desire to have it taken of them as a tale told to deaf men, but to the wise and indifferent, I hope it may prove a song sung in a wood, that had a profitable echo. For whose sakes also I had thought to have compassed out this matter with another meat wand, but that the multitude of precepts should have been thereby obscured, a fault and hindrance to have made open and plain things less known.   

THE DISPLAY OF FOLLIE.  

Huddle. SEe you neighbour Dunstable what hot spurring there is made after the Buck over yonder land? were it with you and me as it hath been since each knew other, we could not behold such sport thus far of, but rather so far as might become us, keep way with the foremost. Dunstable. Sir then was then, and now is now, they that cannot do as they have done, must content themselves with what they may do: pleaseth it you therefore to give over the game in the plain field, and to let me tie up our horses to yonder bough, reposing ourselves awhile under the shade of this goodly green Oak. Hud. I readily consent to your indifferent motion. Dunst. Because it is unwholesome and not altogether safe to sleep in this wild wood, let me beseech you to discourse such matters as our experience may delight us to remember: withal, vouchsafe I pray you, to report the news of London, for thence I unsterstand your mastership is lately come. Hud. With a glad will, but ere we enter into them, let me first tell you what I latest heard, which proving true will equally glad us both. This noble Earl is not come hither to take an honourable recreation only, as heretofore he was wont, but purposeth withal to keep a standing house here the whole year through. Dunst. But that I fear the contrary, how should I rejoice at these glad tidings. Hud. Myself in like manner hold the matter doubtful, knowing the special employments her Majesty hath daily to make of his most approved good services being still as he hath been always so excellent a becoming states pear, that his worthiness cannot but carry him from us to matters of far greater consequence. To say truly, our untoward deservings have merited no such benefit from him for longer than we are receiving good turns at his hands, or in hope of his pleasuring us, no longer can we stay our tongues from cursing, banning, and ungracious depraving his noteable parts, whereof we are most unworthy to judge, yet always take upon us singular skill and knowledge: were it therefore but our ungratitude only, than which hell hath not a more ugly vice, it alone were sufficient to discourage such hopes of our good as from the rich treasure of his honourable bounty otherwise might likely descend unto us. Our malignant hearts are bend towards this Gentleman like as the double devoted jews were against our Saviour Christ, whom they worshipped and reverenced so far, as miracles and their own gain might stir them up to admire him, further they would not have to do with him, until the time came they were able to betray, lay violent hands, or crucify him. Now this good Earl, his Chimneys smoke, to prepare wherewithal to cram and fat up our swine bellies, now we wonder at him, and term him noble Gentleman, honourable Lord, wise counsellor, and the princeliest subject any realm Christened hath or had in our memory. False hearted hirelings can we say thus while Beef & Brewis lasteth then, with false black breath, boiling from out a venomous stomach blast the sweet blossoms of his fruitful virtues, which even now had almost been made profitable unto us, had we not put forth our snakish tongues tipped with the poisonful hissing of slander and detraction. But now I long to hear the faults you have observed in my long speech, hoping you will deal plainly in manifesting them unto me. Dunst. Since it is your pleasure to stay your discourse with a desire to hear my plain eloquence, I rather blame you for speaking too little against that which is so worthy reproof, than otherwise think much or that you over said in the Earl his praise. To say truly, such are our gross manners, not caring what we say so we say somewhat, and somewhat we must say, else could not the world take knowledge of our sufficiencies, which serve us much better to find wants in other men, where they are not, then to feel the burden of our own extremities, lying heavy upon our shoulders, ready to break our weak backs. For my part, I mean to turn that cursed speaking you named into hearty prayer, that it may please God to further this noble man his purpose and desire, both to this whole country's benefit, and also to the encouraging of other noble and worshipful Gentlemen, who accompany him in love and good will, to do the like by his example, where they dwell. A thing so much discontinued and so far worn out of fashion, that unless by some notable man it be reduced and set up again, the old ancient patterns lost and gone, I fear me, it will hardly or never catch the right shape again, men have swerved so much to the new cut, wearing all on London fashion, where they never think on their poor countries, save on quarter rend days only. Hud. Though you spared me on the main which stood in your way, you thought to neck me on the buy, not set for you. The oversight I made in comparing the jews dealings with God and Christians their behaviour towards man, that mistaking you would not see, though too apparent to a curious eye: but free and tolerable things to be used or laid aside, according to the occasions and discretions of men, those you launched at even out of your reach, presuming for that you shadowed yourself under the coverture of a formal figure, finding fault with yourself to escape undiscovered, marching with your colours flying: therein you use me as the blind Spaniard his boy served his master, who to make a lurching fault himself, was content not to find his masters little digression from the law himself had made, as if a little breach in the one not found fault with, should give the other a liberty to offend at large. The outside of your coat never gave me cause to suspect any such lining: beside, what your ancient patterns and fashions should mean, I cannot easily guess. My years being some few more than yours, me thinks I should remember from as long a time as you. The while I have hued, things have been gained and bettered by wiser skill and sufficienter knowledges, whereby to raise more profitable and convenient uses out of things, as may appear in matters almost of every sort. Heretofore had men attained unto any little smattering or small mastery in arts or understandings above the rest, they strait thought it a point of their deepest skill to hold others back from the reach thereof, purposely to have the more ignorant to dote upon them, else could not the masters of balductum ceremonies, have climbed up by crafty conveyance, to sit in thrones above Emperors and Kings. I suppose by your ancient patterns and fashions, you mean apparel and hospitality, wherein to my small power I will do my good will to take away the error of your mislike, beginning first at apparel. Amongst sundry sorts of men there have always been divers kinds of attires, according to the humours degrees & abilities of the wearers, the shape & fashion being ever in the or dainers choices to please themselves according to the device and conceit of best becoming. Therein this present age hath rather surpassed, to their commendation, fitting nearer by Tailors shapes and garnishings, with better proportioning and setting out garments, to their bodies, than the Rutterking Tailors of the old stamp, whereunto you would have fashions brought back again. You might as well appoint men to go naked or loosely attired, which they have done, as not to allow them that must were clothes, to fit their bodies according to their own mind and fantasy. Had you found fault with too costly apparel, where neither the degree nor place requireth it, or with too fantastical or superfluous wearing, where half the stuff would suffice to make a far more seemly garment; or had you spoken against their follies, who fet envious patterns to outvie and undo one the other, by trying masteries in fashions, who should bcare the prodigal bell away: which time and cost had been better spent in the emulation of virtues acts, who should have deserved best in deeds of marshal prowess beseeming fortitude: therein had I agreed with you: but through the haste you made to find out these, not so worthy your displeasure, such have also escaped you. I rather think you wanted words to express your good conceit, not accustomed to speak in such things, than any ways come short of judgement to discern aright in greater difficulties. Dunst. Surely you favour me rightly; for it was my meaning to show the dislike I had of such as wear more on their backs in one day, than their fathers did in their whole life time. Hud. Now I dare undertake by your weighty words, you mean such as wear more armour on their backs in one day, or are girt with more wounds and stripes then their Fathers were. Dunst. Nay rather, I speak against that excess, where commendable Farms which were wont to maintain & bring up honest tenants and their children, over and above the rent, are dashed upon one suit of apparel together with one days unmeasurable expenses. Hud. I perceive you could be content to dwell rent-free, upon the grudge you bear hereat, all the days of your life. But now to your patterns of housekeeping, I will see to fit you better therein, for I know that troubles you most, and giveth you least cause of offence. Know you how all fathers that leave their heirs lands, charge the said livings? First the mother her carrying away a jointer, movables and furniture of the house, that must needs be one hindrance why the son should not begin where the father left: then paying out of brothers and sisters portions, is also a hindrance to make him less able to keep house and port equal with your ancient pattern. Now again, besides lands and goods, perhaps he wants the offices and entertainmets from his prince, which his father was assisted by, in that ample manner to do that you so hastily require. But put the case all Noblemen and Gentlemen were in better sort able to maintain housekeeping after this fashion, than any ancestor they had, I will show you sufficient reasons, and those profitable also to the common wealth, to have such lavish housekeeping forborn. When you had these prodigal spend, for custom sake, they neither knew why nor wherefore, a progeny of voluntary or rather wilful beggars were thence outrraised, the swarm and rabble whereof by continuance have defamed and slandered the whole nation, besides the general and particular hurts they do in the places where they are yet in that sort maintained. Is one Gentleman be able to show you half a thousand thus bred and continued, from one descent to another, for many hundreds of years, it is like England hath some greater store of these straw companions. It were much for me to say, that the first brawl of them came from this occasion: because of the likelihood, I will venture to think they did and show you my reasons: First their breeding and customary abode in one place, excercising one self kind of life; then the commodiousness of a wasteful house, to fcster them up in that free and liberal sort, without exception to any that would help away with beef and mutton, as much at their commandment, that would in this sort come to take it, as at theirs whose breeding and growing it was of. For it is more likely they took their beginning from houses thus wanton kept, then from a farther fetched devise of Abbeys and Priories, whose benefacting that way extended chiefly to their supposed children and Paramoures, inhabiting Milles and out-granges within their bells ringing, whither by outleaps they made their Sabaoth days journeys: their cherishing was only of such, to do to have, as the Scot saith, an ease for a pleasure. Again, such as were fallen by casualties or burdensome occasions of many children into poverty, former times, I must confess, had greater respect in time to see to them then we have, who lightly always by charitable contributions restored them back again, & in time, to an estate ere they could catch a habit or delight therein: a matter better pleasing no doubt to the parties relieved, than the other contemptuous custom of wilful begging. Now whether it be likely that unmeasurale house keep were the occasions to draw loitering disposed persons from labour to ease, and from one enticing degree to another, till it had fully possessed them to erect a habit or faculty of slothful beggars: the first degreebeing in themselves through this provision, other members of their like sort and quality, as the rogue and vagrant beggar, indeed have proceeded from the number and superfluity of the first kind: now I say the better consideration hereof to judge, I refer to yourself. Dun. Through your gentle teachings, I begin to perceive an approved error, in overdoing, as well in things that have good purposes and intents, as also in matters grounded upon mischiefs, carrying an outward show of holy and religious deeds. I confess, Monasteries and Priories were not so likely to have been causes hereof, as the other dissolute houses, where refresh were without respect or partiality. The Monks and Abbots of my knowledge, cut large shivers of the loaf for which they never sweat, to make themselves strong in the people's favour and opinion, or else spent their whole get upon unlawful children. Yet notwithstanding by your favour, you have not attained unto the full of my meaning and desire herein. Hud. I confess I have not, for the fight of beefed beggars that thronged so thick in my way: but now I have got past them, I will go near to meet you on your own bawlke. Your desire is to have houses kept to bear the Lord of misrule company at Christmas, spending then upon Hick and Stephan, who have no need of it, what would maintain a seemly family more than half a year. Such may well be called the Lord of misrule his guests, who besides excessive over-eating & drinking themselves, spoiling by misuse that they cannot devour, leave behind them also such unmannerly annoyances, called beastialities, that the Nobleman and Gentleman that hath thus crammed his quoistrels, must of necessity forsake their house and housekeeping, till a good wind blow away the unpleasant savours their Christmas Poulcats leave behind them. Thus besides excessive cost and trouble by the fruits of this careless hospitality, their houses are lest in worse case then common Inns or ostelries. If it be a sheep-shearing feast, master Baily can entertain you with his bill of reckonings to his Master, or three shepherds wages, spent on fresh cates, besides spices and Saffron pottage. So that the Nobleman & Gentleman should have nothing come in clearly to them at any season, if your ancient patterns might be rightly observed. I know your meaning is not to have the Hockedame waited on by them, who for the most part let their lands to halves, or else convert all into rent. The entertainment one of them gives unto another cannot be that you call so hotly upon: for those fashions you have a homely term I list not to remember you of. Dun. The money your mastership hath spent in learning and travel, is every penny better bestowed then other. Now I plainly see, let an ignorant man be never so wise, or of never so great experience, but if he meet with a man of gifts and bringing up, his presuming to know all things proveth plain ignorance, and mere mistaking. Once to day I took myself to know as many ways to the Church as master Vicar himself, but now I see Plowmen are no preachers. I have a Son that hath cost me many a quarter of corn, on whom for this days work I will bestow one Peck of pure grain, which touched no chaff this many a day, to buy him more learning; and though I am not able to breed a Gentleman, I may perhaps, as well as some of my neighbours, bring up one. Hud. I marvel how you stumble on the Church and the Minister: this hot weather and our long talk should rather have put you in mind of the Butler and the Buttery. Besides I cannot bethink me what virtue should be in your peck of pelf, especially to alter nature; myself withal the proof I could make, could never find the skill to cause a barking mongrel to become a true questing Spaniel. To be plain with you, I never think an Ape more diformed, then when he striveth by borrowed skill, to put on that which nature cannot grace: nay rather those things are most ugly, which are forced and done in spite of nature. Every one to whom Mastership belongethiss not a Gentleman, what purchase soever his father maketh, unless he can procure blood to alter kind: that you cannot give your son, because you have not attained unto it yourself. The notabilitie hereof proceeds from chivalry and marshal prowess, where for princes right, and commonweals safety, through worthy adventures of blood and life, purchase is made at the dearest price and rate. Therefore as there cannot be a greater cause amongst men, than the Prince and commonwealths business, nor a greater matter than blood and life, to be powered out and parted withal, of necessity the greatest and principallest respect and regard hath ever been had thereunto. Dunst. By your favour sir, there are no such laws yet made to prove Soldiers Gentlemen: or if there be, it is left out of their style in all that I can read or understand of their profession. Hud. If you speak ignorantly, I am contented to help you over the style; you seem not able to climb, but if you play the Fox with me, grapes are no meat for you, especially of my reaching unto you. Because I have some doubt of your words, and no cause to mistrust yourself, I will declare my mind herein more sully. You know how all that are put to learning prove not learned, neither all degrees of learning of like estimation: no more are any to be counted Gentlemen, unless they were so before their degrees taken in Artes. Likewise, all that follow the wars prove not Soldiers, nor all that prove Soldiers, take not their degrees at arms: neither those that take degrees, all of one account or worth. For as there are diverse kinds of virtues to make virtuous, so are there diverse degrees of the virtuous, according to the sorts of the virtues they have attained The most rich and excellent virtues were principally acquired and gotten by princely deserving men, the renown of whose glorious deeds hath rightly gotten unto themselves just pre-eminence to guide and go before the rest, as hereafter I will plainly show you. In their power and Majesty only therefore it is to nobilitate, commend unto honour, and to make Gentlemen, and not in your peck of drossy ointment, though made of the Quintessence of old Angels. Gentlemen bred in the wars, and those that come of them, you see are not made, for it is no proper speech, to say that is made, which is bred; neither can art or reason help to make it good. Dunst. Without offending you with my rude answers, let me ask you this mannerly question. Do you mean those that are begotten and borne in a Camp, to be only Gentlemen of blood, or how otherwise I beseech you to show me? I have heard this matter often debated, but never fully agreed upon. Hud. Because you have already heard it doubtfully handled, and at no time discussed, it may in like sort become me to give place to some doctor of the Civil law, to whose profession it especially appertaineth to know the certainty of all worthy antiquities. Dun. It fits me not to importune you, otherwise I should receive a great good turn at your masterships' hands thereby, for my son takes great delight in petegrees of Gentlemen, and hath some skill in quartering their coats. God willing he shall one day weight upon you to better his knowledges, if it may please you to accept of his unworthiness. Hud. Bring him with you on Sunday next to dinner, where you shall be sure of a Pig for your son his welcome, therein I mean to prove his skill, how he can head and shoulder the same; the jaws and ears he shall bestow upon you after he hath quartered them. The head so spoiled, he shall charge his quadrate trencher with. Dunst. I thought I should make you merry with my mistake, I now and then catch a word or two from my son, which for lack of due placing, marreth all in the making. Hud. You shall in earnest (if you list to carry it with you) hear what I can do in your son his Art. The Pig's head shall be upon a Spit couchant, the tongue pendant, the brains dormant in the sauce poignant. Now for a supporter or crest, because of the quadrufoile in his bare head, there shall be a recompense made by purchase of the back ribs and chinbone. All these thus put together, must of necessity conclude somewhat, especially in a morning fasting. Dun. Most of these terms my son hath by heart, and will talk them to a glass window I have, when many times it is my fortune to overhear him. According to your saying also he hath often confessed unto me, that his wit and memory have served him best to those purposes in a morning ear he have eaten any thing. But still I am to put you in mind of my former desire, wherein I am persuaded you are able to satisfy a much better man than myself. Hud. Rather than to give cause to hinder our exercise of speaking, I will do my best to content your mind herein, hoping you will not put my ignorance upon me as a reproof, neither return a bolt weakly shot, strongly upon my ownehead. It should seem there were ignorant times wherein men lived in full plenty so abundant, that they needed not at all to search out or care for, more than the use of necessaries already in their own possessions. In progress of further time, while they were thus lulled in their soft delights, their ordinary provision through their numbers increasing, began as it were to abate and grow empty, well towards a want on the sudden: now the way to supply the same, was not so ready as the necessity grew urgent; whereupon some few, or rather one above the rest, stirred up by a more ready motion, and better resolved spirit, put forth himself with purpose rather to seek remedies where they might likely or possibly be found, then securely to stay themselves upon deceivable means. These few thus quickening their dull senses, by the instigation of that quahtie which is ever least subject to base neglect, to prevent that which was like to ensue, they ranged into the world like companions and fellow adventurers in the behalf of themselves and the rest; whose cogitations for want of stability of courage, could neither respect nor take in hand, any thing beyond the slow custom of gross ease. These worthies, I say, thus trusting to their bold and confident courages, set up their rest, either to follow & acquire that which should become profitable in a community to the whole society and company, or never to return back, or once to think of the sweetness they had tasted by their former variety and plenty. God, who ever prospereth the most worthy portion of his grace, which setteth forwards itself to virtuous and industrious acquirements, presented in short time unto their view, helps before that time unknown, but yet not without danger, nor so successful, but still they should work themselves into the possession of them, by hardy, painful, and manlike endeavours. After they had through this good gift & inclination of Fortitude, been brought to the discovery and knowledge of these likely means, by exercise and progress in this virtue, they dared withal to adventure, and with a voluntary courage set upon difficulties, which ere that time for want of proofe-making in themselves, they had not mastered. Setting at the first, fierceness against fear, and extremity against extremity, and so by the aiding hand of God easily conquered into their obedience and use, first wild and forcible creatures, than others that were under the mastery and command of them, before that time the matter of their spoil. These worthies thus returning with profitable relief to their drones at home, who notwithstanding their own defects, were yet able to conceit and admire the excellency of the conquerors by their achievements, most moderately on the sudden they extolled and lift them up beyond the credit and belief, that they could be less than Gods in comparison and distinction of doings, being brought on at the first by these motions and affections of joy, there was no doubt in continuance they would be settled in opinion to receive and reverence them for no less than Gods in deed. After, by this support of courage, they had gone through and accomplished matters sufficiently behoveful for the common bearing out of necessities; they than cast another about presently with themselves, how to increase and make permanent their young and new begun world strongly resolving with themselves afresh, that now it was no less expedient, with laws and manners to fashion them how to live, then before it was needful to seek out necessaries to maintain life. After they had entertained and taken into counsel the prudent and considered virtue, you may then think they gained by degrees, into matters which have been in differently from one time to another delivered over, as may appear by the benefits we have received from them which were immediately before us. Now amongst those that were thus provoked and prepared through the force and faculty of Fortitude, after they had exercised their desires upon such hard and laborious things, as before I showed to be out of their powers, there was also in the company of these few, one principal man, whom I would have you to understand, in the sight and beholding of the other did that above the rest, whereunto they were rather ministers of aids and obedient helpers, than any way able to equal: to whom they did both in their expedition abroad, and also ever after in all places, for his chief worthiness, attribute duty unto. This princely worthy, being more entire and fully possessed with the height of virtues, whether by the benefit of nature, or by the special indument of God's grace, with absolute parts, he by all their consents had princely powers set upon his shoulders, and by general voices, was chosen and instituted their Duke and leader, to go before them in all manner of concernings, aswell of war and conquest, as also to be their upholder, conserver, and commander in all matters of civil institution and derection. Now after all eyes were fastened on him, and all hearts bend at his devotion, such as would not forsake their reckless sloth, but still have wrapped themselves within the spoil of others labours, such at the length by his assignment, were appointed places to serve in, according as every one was spirited, disposed, or more or less apt to perform and discharge trust and services to be committed unto them. Dunst. Surely Sir, you have spoken so darkly, that for the thick spleigh of boughs and broad leaves of this tree, I cannot discern your meaning. Huddle. Think you I go about to deceive you with darkness of words? If a field be said to have eyes, a wood may likewise have ears. But whether you hear me not, or list not to believe me, the likelihood hereof shall carry me to credit the same, knowing that matters of less proof and more unlikely truth, have been received from worse grounds and beginnings than this cometh from. But you may see how the love I bear you hath carried me to climb unknown haunts, and such difficult paths, as there are no steps or traces left me to follow; therefore you may say, it is like to prove a hard journey to a weak traveler. Dunst. Now I better remember myself, I have read many stories agreeing with your worthies in their notable deeds and exploits, done by courageous and bold attempts. Huddle. I will not seek to win you by extremity of speeches, but leave you to the liberty of your own better conceaving. To keep whole the understanding of the matter, I will come to that which shall neereliest agree with that I said before. After this principal Worthy was enthronized by others, himself was also addicted and disposed, for the better conservation of all things in order, in the integrity of his judgement and discern, to consider with rewards and dignities such deservers and beautified minds, as himself had seen forward by ready and fervent dispositions, placing and crediting unto them for their tried and approved services, such degree of trust and superiority, as might both stand in stead towards a recompense of their travails, and also the more encourage them to go on with him in perfecting things necessary to uphold societies and vocations, whereunto he had lately sorted the whole people. Afterward, such of all sorts as had defected and come short in sufficiency, to perform matters and places committed unto them, so as the rest received loss and hindrance by their fault or negligence; such injurious deceivers were deposed, thrust down, and disfranchised, as persons unfit to become the strong virtues and properties beseeming men ever after compelled to exercise weak things, and withal enjoined to live out the rest of their days in the company and conversation of women. What occasion soever notwithstanding urging the use of them, such were never recalled nor suffered to execute duties amongst men. Dun. That you may perceive the warmth my belief hath catched through your most excellent description, I will open unto you my conceiving of your speeches, by the process whereof I gather, you mean to derive Kings and Princes from the most especial deserving worthy, who from successor to successor, have still added ornaments of rare excellencies: to the intent that those who from time to time have issued from them, might through their clear and shining perfections be discerned to have issued from such noble, famous, and renowned progenitors. Proving further withal, that such high prowess and meritorious parts never fading, but ever more and more increasing, have long sithence through the dignity and glory of notable deeds by the hand of God, been exalted into throne and Majesty wherein they sit, having in themselves through him sufficient power and ability enough to nobilitate and make famous whomsoever they may please to nominate, appoint, and choose. Hud. I think it hath been the warmth of gentle blood, which beating within your breast, hath thrust out this formality you indent your words withal: could my consent help towards it, you should be made a gentle master Scrivener, for your orderly frame of words are so well suited, that as me thinketh you have much amended the old pattern you began with in the morning. If you mistake me in sense also no worse hereafter, it shall not repent me to talk of this fashion yet a while longer with you. Dunst. Though of myself it soundeth not well, yet without brag be it spoken, there be Gentlemen of blood in this country that sit not so high in the subsidy book, neither are rated in furnitures and setting out of men to the wars in sort as I am. Hud. Herein you deceive me little. I ever took you fit for the land then the sea. How can you prove a good merchant, that are not willingly pleased with the venture of a little without grudging, to gain infinitely and continually? I doubt me if her majesties most gracious providence exceeded not the benevolent respects you bear even to yourself, you could not so quietly have increased your ability, nor brought your wealth to that plenty, you now enjoy it, but might have been endangered to have lost somewhat of that you have long sithence through her safe government and defence, laid up hoards, robbing the commonwealth of the due uses they were made and should serve for. There are too many both unmerciful and most unthankful men, who repine and are more troubled with the departure of a from their superfluity and abounding plenty, than other good men are from their reasonable and competent abilities, which they readily show to the uttermost by their good intents. I partly know them you stretch your superlative degree of comparisons at or if I do not, thus much generally I can say of all Gentlemen, that their forwardness to have such things in a readiness for themselves, if need should so require, and with setting out their sons in services already past, that if you should be rated, as they becomingly prepare themselves, you would think yourself rob of that you bestow in that sort, of and for the safety of yourself and your goods. I confess you want no ability with the foremost to perform necessary services, could your willing heart consent to the same, as I said to your own good. I trust for Subsidies, gentlemen's lands and their other values are more readily discerned, and far more serviceable than your buried pelf, laid up for the devil and his kingdom of darkness. Had you the lamentable experience but of one days wars, which God keep us from, you would then call for twenty years subsidies, and bring them in as willingly as you now bury and obseure them from the service of the realm For all your complaining, I doubt not but once in the year you squit out a commodity to ingrate upon the Gentleman's necessity you mean, with buying either his whole years wood-sale, his crop on the ground, or some other out-lying commodity, that shall go near to defray your whole years charges, the marriage of your children excepted. Dunstable. Had I thought your mastership would have taken my free speeches in so ill part, which concerned only myself and my ready ability, to forward to my power my Prince her occasions and services, I would have forborn to have uttered my mind, wherein I only grieved, that any should exempt themselves or forbear to extend their uttermost help and endeavour in such good works. My intent was not to repine at my own easy charges, especially to perform so necessary a duty. If it please you to forget my foolish speeches and scattering questions, beginning where the matter broke off, you shall favour me; in that I have a special desire to hear at the full, you having so notably entered into the declaration thereof. You left at absolute virtues, which are the gifts of nature, and accompany Gentlemen from their birth. Huddle. Since by your desire I am put in mind of complete virtues, which are said to be in Princely descents of blood from the beginning, and at their entrance into the world: I am contented there to begin again. All creatures in manner that bear life, have also at the first an inclination towards a very near similitude of the nature from whence they came: by which I prove the perfections that are in parents, descend wholly and without change, steps, or doings on, in like manner and sort to their children, as they were endued therewith themselves, but if the parent want the perfection thereof himself, his child may attain unto it, but not by nature's benefit, for that the foregoing one had not the entire possion thereof in the time of his life. It is evident to every understanding, that absolute virtues neither decrease nor increase, for look what is perfect in it own fullness, the same is able to enrich and fortify what it affecteth, and naturally inclineth itself wholly unto: it never decreasing, as I said, because of it perfection it can be no less in the succeeding child, than it was in the proceeding father, so that the virtue most excellent in the one, shall be the same without exceeding or diminishing in the other, admitting no mediocrity, reacheth at the first the uttermost point of the virtue which was of that integrity in the former Worthy. That virtue which wanted perfection in the progenitor, his offspring may attain unto: but it is not his proper and peculiar blessing, as it should have been, had it not wanted perfection in the other. Because the one wanted the full and entire possession thereof, he cannot deliver it over by descent in blood. Dunsta. Belike then, if the worthy progenitor had attained to the type of all perfections, his worthy offspring had at the first immediately been seasoned with that most precious liquor, according to the influence into the former vessel. Hud. Yea undoubtedly, but the mystery of the perfection celestial, which you rightly termed a most precious influence, it is too divine to dwell upon earth, or to be discussed by mortal sense and understanding: but the next unto that omnipotency, are Kings and Princes, because they receive their blessings from God directly, without other benefit or additament whatsoever. Dunst. Then I pray you Sir, how do diverse without the benefit of this generous blood, attain to such ripeness as may make them worthy high place and dignity in the word? Huddle. Through forward inclination and disposition, taken with the love and desire to imitate such serviceable virtues as they have seen approved and rewarded in others, whose more properly at the first they were, and so upon just cause, are both received and held worthy men. In the first virtuous man, I showed you even now, after his good speed was seen, and the way known, how he did great things, others were stirred up to have pleasure and delight in the like, yet such also as were better endued, and of a more ready motion than the rest. For all could neither be incited by example; nor forced by compulsion to needful and concerning duties, to the pleasuring of themselves. Dunst. By this reckoning, wisdom to forethink is not the least help both to seek and also to become great places attained unto. Hud. All my speeches have tended to that end and purpose, Yet first I showed you, how bold courage did rouse and waken men from out the cradle of security, before they were assisted by consultation: even than also had they failed of resolution to enterprise and break through disficulties, such also as perhaps were repugnant unto reason, and above that wit could persuade to be possible, than all had fainted, and nothing had been achieved. Now wit, art, and counsel, which you spoke of right now, might have served them to prolong their plenty, and to have held them still in ease, to have leslened and made away by devise, some of their superfluous and rising numbers; but the strong virtue was first, and it prevailed to best purposes and blessings. Dunst. Now sir I beseech you, speak somewhat of the defects that were found in them that never came forward. Hud. I have promised so to do. You may imagine, that while the sun is oppressed and surcharged with clouds, her virtue of comforting is for the while hindered; but when she hath out wrought them, and broken through the black prison, her light is then clear, and her operations effectual. Likewise, whilst wantonness, belly cheer, and other entangling delights, held men back from the use and knowledge of themselves: till I say, the maisterfull spirit had by main force, spoiled and driven away all impediments, they could purchase no freedom nor rest contented, unless they were able also to make a through conquest of themselves, than which there could not be a greater victory. Dunst. A fair and a virtuous generation of worthy men, fit to take example at. Hud. The princely worthy, that had been the cause of the beginning and discovery of all these things, through his search and adventurous inquiry, after I say he had laid these fast knowledges, sufficient both for their own foundation, and also for continuing their succeeding posterities, making always the end of one discovery, the beginning of another, and after himself for all these benefits had been deservedly crowned and holden in due honour and regard of the rest, at once he amended all their estates, bringing the number of such as were out of order, into order, by provision as aforefaid, of such necessaries acquired, as nothing but the justice and displeasure of almighty God could bereave them. Now to jump with your desire, I will directly show you who were the pecora campt, to whom for their unwillingness little or nothing was possible. You must also remember, how at the first I told you, few by nature and their own ready inclination were warlike, yet by instruction and imitation, shaking off and expulsing the first disease called sloth, many were fashioned and instituted, by the desire they had to follow the discipline of the first worthies. Notwithstanding all this, there remained a sculke of such, as neither care nor castigation could amend or make able to entertain other purpose or desire then at the first. Besides, to increase their number & sort, there were diverse whose courages abated, degenerating and declining by immoderate and intemperate contrarieties, through which they corrupted and lost their first blood and estimation, differing in a manner altogether from the good resolutions to virtues, which at the first, either themselves or their ancestors had been raised unto: who rather then fail, by erudition and tradition, for the honour of their own first virtues, were desirous to have had their posterity assumed and admitted unto them. To make along tale short, and the rather, because the evening star hath made the air temperate and fit for us to travel, you must still note the number that always subjecteth themselves so much to inordinate liberty, that no decree could demonstrate unto them any thing sufficient to respect a more civil and perite life; but that they would repose themselves upon pleasures, which they desired still to hold, as their defence and fafegard, to keep and defend them from the perils of their life. Playing the tyrants thus with themselves, suffering baseness to bear all the sway, according to beastly fantasy and licentious appetite, such never came at all forward to better themselves, neither by reputations for virtues, which they were careless to possess; nor for desire they had to purge or segregate themselves from the soft vices they were first infected withal: neither yet were at all moved with the felicity they saw the reformed to live in: nay the commandment and reprehension that was used for their amendment and bettering prevailed not in them. Now comparing the number of those who never admitted excellencies, with those that fell away and decreased their worthy parts and qualities, without respect or care to put on again the habit and dignity of well doing, you may well find the cause, why so many unworthy, are at all times found amongst so few blessed and happy men, who are endued with excellent dispositions of themselves, to do and to distribute good and wise things. Dunst. I pray you sir suffer me yet to ask you this one question more, whether you think courage or counsel the more beneficial virtue, to advance and set forward actions of greatest moment? Hud. I am content to understand you by your meaning, and so answer to that I think your desire is to know, which of the twain should be the first or more principal virtue to become great things. If wit should be of more force than courage, who should keep the Wolf from the door? the fold alone cannot defend the sheep, neither one sheep help another. If courage were not the prevailing virtue, wit would persuade him not at all to go to the wars, and suffer there all indurances, depriving us of such laudable things, as we might else at ease and in safety enjoy. Wit can teach, it is more safe tarrying at home, sleeping in a whole skin upon a soft bed, then to lie in a watery ditch abroad with bleeding wounds. Wit can show you, that it is better to stand by a fire of straw, making Malt in a dry house, then to suffer cold, thirst and hunger under the wide open welkin. Wit taught Ulysses rather to counterfeit madness, and to choke himself with his country smoke; then to change sweet and prosperous pleasure for the sour adversities that are suffered in the wars. Wit waiting upon courage, that is a consonant thing to compass and make all undertakings fortunate. Fortitude shall have much to do, to make wit shake of his fear, forget his trembling motions, and to put on the armour of all proofs, called military boldness: but when that is once on, with more ease he shall be taught the skills and knowledges which belong to the tolerating and sufficient doing hard and difficult things. After this, besides wit must also have constant persuasion, to dare to enterprise, and in person himself to go against dangers. Wit thus girt, it is good conferring and counseling with him in the field: but if naked wit be principal man there, the Drum and Trumpet must sound and strike up false alarms to dance base dances: first on a little forwards, at the first he crieth, then by and by retire: the rest must be danced backward, which is called a base dance, especially in the field. Naked wit can bid others be bold to fight, and run away himself, he can give counsel, and direct to begin well, but when there is most need to go forward, defecteth even in his own precepts, such tyrants can lead men into the field for their own good, under the standard of wit. To such fair wars I think a man might entreat your company. Dunst. Alas Sir, hard lodging and bad diet would be as good as a murdering piece to kill me out right. Yet for one day I could be content to see fashions amongst them with a quarter of a cold Pig, and an Aquavita bottle under my girdle. Hud. Nay, I can assure you, the wars and a cold stomach will never agree: at these years, you and I will pray from them that may. To march in Armour, and to go under the weight thereof, would break our bones, being, as they are, cold, dry, and marrowless. Dun. My son telleth me, it is nothing now a days to be a soldier, for they never come to pitched fields, as they were wont in our old English wars, when the division of houses was. Hud. Is your son a Fencer that ways to; I think he be an universal man. But I pray you what ward hath he to bear of a Musket bullet? it must needs be with his legs, for his hands I know are not Pistol proof. Dunst. I confess those guns are devilish things, and make many men run away that other ways would not turn their heads. But when I said a Soldier, I meant the General or commander in the wars. He telleth me many times he could discharge the place himself, though he never saw an enemy in the face. Hud. Not unlike, but show me I pray you, wherein the commanders office consisteth, according to that you have heard your son report. Dunstable. Marry sir, in ordering and ordaining the field, and in well lodging his camp, near rivers and places defended from contagious noisome winds. Hud. What shall then be the Lord Marshal his place under him, if his Generalship be thus employed▪ Dunst. He saith Hannibal supplied both the rome's himself, and made the offices one: he always when he came to join battles and prepare his fights, bestowed his footmen upon hills and places of advantage, and his horsemen in the plains and even valleys beneath. Hud. If young Hannibal your son were chief in the field, his footmen should be Astronomers or wizards, to know when they should not fight, then from the hills to give signs to the horsemen to be gone, and fly away together, and so your son his host should consist of a running camp. Though I was never worthy to bear the name of a companion in the wars, yet under his conduct I could be content to refuse the offer of a very good place and office. Dun. What office is that, and why? I pray you sir let me know. Hud. No entertainment could tempt me to be master of his carriages, to carry & recarry hills and dales, winds and waters; beside I know the great library that hath cost you so many quarters of Corn, must also wait upon his removes. If that fleet up and down with him, well he may lose an eye with poring upon his Puerilis, but with climbing the Alps as Hannibal did, for catching an ill humour in that sort, I dare put you in comfort and be his warrant. Dun. May it please you sir to take a hard lodging at my house to night, for I see by the Moons leap into her watery circle, if we sit long here, unwholesome dews will be sent down upon us. Hud. Not now I thank you, I have such business with my Lord that I cannot, when I come into the country again in winter, it is like I will bid myself upon this warrantise. Dunst. I have a case of some extremity, wherein I would be glad of your worship's counsel, might I be so bold to crave it. Hud. tomorrow in the morning when my Lord is gone forth again to hunt, I will be ready for you, and as glad of your company as to day. Dunst. God keep you Sir, as it becometh me, I will wait upon your coming abroad in the morning. Hud. Good night neighbour.  
The end of the first days meeting.   

THE SECOND DAYS MEETING.  
Huddle. TO make payment of my promise, I have overslipped an opportunity with my Lord, but I hope to recover it with my better diligence the next day. Dun. It is a busy harvest day also with me, and I might ill have been spared from my work folks, who will make it noon till it be night, with drinking, singing, and lazing themselves in the shock: but I had rather lose their whole days work, then to have miss your worship, who so friendly remember me to your hindrance. Hud. I perceive they sing well that work well with you, but this fair day will make them labour like Bees to gather in your harvest. Dun. That servant is too wicked and careless, who will take his hire and leave his work in this season, especially when it is a sign of health to labour. Hud. I doubt not but you are wise enough to reward them according to their deserts. Dunst. I pray you sir, hear you any further news of the good Earl his abiding here still amongst us? Hud. There is nothing known to the contrary; they that would have it so, hope as they did, but how it will fall out, the sequel must show. Dunst. How happy a thing were it to the commonwealth, if men of prize would live in their countries to keep the unworthy back. But the negligence of them that are and should be worthy, encourage others to take their places, and suffer them so greedily to catch up, what they carelessly let fall. Should you but see what market crosses, some men's houses are made with baskets to present all manner of things that every season affordeth, you would think it more than time to wish better men in their places: false custom hath made wantonness of those that are of no desert nor need▪ on purpose to bereave them that want, even of that they bring up and should live by. Nay the foolish world is made more afraid, and stand in greater another of these proud takers, than they are of God himself, by which idolatry they are become more religious towards men then to their maker. Should such men not perform to their belly Gods a Michaelmas sacrifice of Honey, they would think their Bees would die in their Hives, or fly away & forsake them at swarming time. If not of Brawn and all manner of wild foul at Christmas, their young stores would become foul, and die of the kernels ear winter pass. If not of Veals and Lambs at Easter, their cattle should rot and die of the murrion or read-water. If not of Pigeons & green Geese at Whitsuntide, their young flights should be starved in Catlock moon, and their stubble Geese fly over their houses at Lammas, and be no more seen. If not of Cherries, Strawberries and Pears at Midsummer, let them look for Caterpillars and Summer-winds, to blast and destroy their fruit ere Autumn come. Would God these widow's mites might serve their turns, than could we go to the pillars and poll ourselves according to good father Tyndall his counsel. But there is that which far exceedeth this, wherewithal at this time I am not a little troubled, but to recite it were needless, because it is bootless. Hud. If you grow fine on the sudden, sparing to utter yourself to me, who am no ways like to prove a dangerous man unto you, this days meeting shall soon take end, and so still safely think to myself what I had thought boldly to have uttered unto you, and the rather at your own desire. Dunst. If you give me leave sir, it shall soon appear unto you, that my own grief and no distrust in your fidelity, hath caused me to take a new breath in the matter. We can no sooner bring up our sons to man's estate, but with costly maintenance we are feign to make presents of them also: look what would have served their turns five years at home according to their births and friends abilities, must be spent in one year on proud rags, to ruffian it out in the company of their betters. Besides, when we have spent ourselves thus upon our yonkerie, even to that which would have proved honest portions for them to have lived all their life through: now beginneth our woe betide, they come home with conditions purchased at too dear a rate. To mend all in the end, their silly mothers make up the matter with their fond kockering, stroking them with foolish words on this sort; My Sam & my Ierom, you shall go no more a serving, but tarry at home with your father and mother. A son I have come home this other day from serving, with clothes all torn, his purse moneyless, and himself no doubt graceless. He had not been two days with me ere he fell upon his younger brothers, the true consorts of my labours, them he outrageously beat, reviling besides his mother and me with such rakehelly words, & hellish oaths, that I feared more than in a tempest, the downfalling of my house on our heads. Not withstanding all this, to make my grief more restless, his unreasonable and inportunate mother lieth at me night and day to make over and commit unto him a little farm that I have forsooth for his preferment in marriage, justifying after her fashion all his vices, which she would have me allow for virtues: the ruffianly brawls with his brothers she termeth manhood, his horrible swearing, hot & hasty stomach: his outfacing & wording at me, audacity and manly boldness; saying the rude hinds his brothers cannot tell how to give a Gentleman his due, that hath been abroad and learned manners and fashions. By her leave he shall show his behaviour in some other place, where such fashions are in request: with me they shall have no allowance, nor himself from me longer maintenance. Better I were now and then to suffer his remiss mother to mistake a quarter or two of corn, to buy the knave a coat with, then to have him Lord it out thus under my nose, and I to sweat and swink, to maintain his lozelrie. Huddle. This you take in so ill part, is not worth your lament nor complaint. If you consider the old bondage and vassalrie men of your condition were wont to bein, you should find, that to bestow a son thus upon a gentleman, to have him brought up, were a pledge of your good will to the master for the man his good, & no such heinous matter as you make it, neither is the place as you impute it, the cause or occasion of your son his faults; for there can no Gentleman be of other mind, but that he had rather his man had many good qualities, than one evil condition. Your sons climbing follies, to equal or rather exceed them he should not strive withal, in costly apparel and lavish expenses, is also blameworthy in yourself, setting proud feathers higher in his top at the first, than you are able to reach and pull down again when you would. Had you said, the taking of gifts and bribes, to pervert and hinder the course of justice had been a matter of common sorrow, and is wont to be withstood and helped by the presence and authority of the honourable, their country's ancient benefactors, next and immediately under the Prince, then had you been of the mind I would have you with me to be in, by such reasons & examples as I am ready to yield you. Gifts are said to draw a curtain between truth and the prudent light & understanding of the just, & to make crooked the strait and plain testimonies and sentences of the righteous. If bribes have truth once in chase, light she not on a strong covert and sanctuary, such an one as is nobility, to refuge the wronged, it is odds after many wrinches and pinches given her in the course, she will also be gathered up and spoiled by her fierce pursuing enemies, which by craft and subtlety, can both gain cope, and take the simple harmless wretch in their cruel gins and merciless snares. Golden blocks thrown in the way of justice, her Chariot is in great danger of overturning. They therefore that think to do justice, should not so much as look upon gifts, which are said to put out the eye of equity. The sellers and buyers thereof, are not worthy to be trusted in a commonwealth, much less fit to hold place and dignity in the same. In Rome's best flourishing days first justice was sold, than Rome itself was offered to be sold. Two unsatiable buyers we are sure of, that is to say, craft and power. Now from viperous matricide sellers, good Lord deliver us. But I hope there are none who would be content to see the tender bowels of their natural parents lie bleeding before them: but rather trust to God, that all our English nation in general will imitate the fidelity of our Noblemen, who I am persuaded are all of worthy Fabricius his mind. He having a great mass of treasure sent him from king Pyrrhus, freely without any conditions to do good or hurt & in the time of his want also, refused the same utterly setting more by his honourable freedom to be beholding to no state or Potentate but his own, than he did of all the wealth of Egypt at which denial or virtuous spectacle, the king admiring, concluded it to be as easy a matter to alter the sun from his course, as to change Fabricius from the strict observance of honesty. Besides their strong resolutions that way, I hope they be Argus eyed to behold from the Beacons & watch towers of their wisdoms, that no rage of rebels shall enter the realm at unwares, to endanger her throne, that is the welfare of us all, through whom under God we are upholden. Further also I doubt not, but if any such serpents come creeping in to disperse their venom, and to infect this sweet soil, which is full of God and her benefits, they will be as wise as Dedalus was, with labyrinths to intricate and enclose them, so sent from greater snakes than themselves to endanger our christian peace. Lay they all on one heap, or were they suited alike, the way to beware them were more easy But some time they lie lurking in fine penny grass, where they are suitably clad to beguile, for green can hardly be discerned from green. Otherwhiles they lie enclosed in caves and dens, where they tarry to mew their old skins, which by running through brambles and briars they having once shed and put off, then become they youthful, and frolic it abroad, drawn forth by the comfort of the least breath of a warm wind or small sunshine. When they have thus dissolved the icy limbs before congealed and benumbed in their frozen dens, then are they fit for the company of them, who cannot live unless they be fed with poison. There they play the serpents indeed, creeping at the first into the hearts of such as under the colour of devotion, they can easily draw into abuse, supplanting allegiance at the first dash. When they have abused such with the infection of conspiracy, to them they draw forth their commission, whereat there hangeth the authentical seal of Rome. The first words within the escript, are murder and rebellion. In the next clause is contained plenary remission, and forgiveness, to any that can flesh themselves in the sacred blood of her gracious Majesty, or any that be especially near unto her. Within this same writ notwithstanding, the unsatiate legates are named Catholics and pretensaries to reform religion, through cruelty to be exercised upon the anointed of God. In the next clause following, there is a charge to bind by oath all to be ready, & at all points furnished, to recover into obedience such as are fallen away from the statutes and ordinances of the sea Apostolic. After that, goeth on the last point, under whom they must serve; that is to wit, under the Archstanderd-bearer of Antichrist, the king of Spain and his deputies. Dun. I trust the joyful crown that God hath given her Majesty, through her true fear and love of him, shall continue her triumph in godly and plenteous peace, to fill the whole land still with her benefits, notwithstanding hells sting, and its roar against her. Hud. Yea God doubtless will ever let them want somewhat to disappoint their wicked rages, which their commission cannot supply, notwithstanding their partialities and factions: as appeared by the omnipotent hand of God from heaven, overthrowing & bringing to nought their Giantlike devices; through the strength and greatness whereof they threatened the firmament, and thought to have supplanted the very foundations and groundworks of heaven. Because you may remember how God confounded the devices of those that put their confidence and trust in themselves, and their own right hands, because, I say, you saw how they were scattered and dispersed into divers nations, flying before the face of the winds, no man forcing them, I will therefore forbear to speak of the notableness thereof, not taking upon me to be able or worthy to judge wherein the secret determination of the Almighty alone prevailed. But now to tell you what they want and seek for chief amongst us, as also to what conclusions their drifts tend: know you that they hunt the authority of great persons, by them to bring in a ravening monster upon us, to work our confusion by a beast of confusion, if there could any such be found that would undertake to bring in hungry raveners to possess with cruelty what they blessedly enjoy. By the judgement of God hitherto, we have seen what their unnaturalness hath wrought against others, and what they have catched for themselves. Du believe me, till now I had little thought their religion had tended to murder & rebellion. Hud. As though the devotion of Rome had at any time other patience then to overthrow by all tyranny and cruelty. They hold no other counsels to amend any thing that is amiss in religion, but presently poisoning, or other degrees of confusion, are either purposed or executed upon them that stand against them. How open a thing is it to every understanding, to believe that they who go about, or wish to change the Queen's most excellent Majesty from the religion she hath always preferred before the safety of her life, that the same men have not concluded and determined her death, according to the endeavours and abilities they were of. Now I hope you see by this commission, how the fellow catholics that were, are become fellow soldiers, & from jesuits, traitors, & seedmen of sedition & conspiracy. Their harmless desire to instruct the ignorant, & to bring back again those seduced stray sheep, that had wandered forth from the fold of Rome, that is also laid a sleep and changed. I remember how they dallied out the matter like Chaucer's Friar at the first, under pretence of spiced holiness. Dun. I beseech you sir, express your conceit of that Friar. Hud. This holy man came sick to a chapel of ease, where one of his good dames dwelled, who had wont to bestow the best room and cherishing in her house on him. She seeing this drooping pulier thus distressed, pity ran soon into her gentle heart, offering to him at the first the choice of such things as she had in a readiness to eat. Amongst the rest a Hen was named, presently to be killed for him. A Hen quoth the limmeter, nay good dame, God defend she should be done to death for so sinful and wicked a wretch as I am; the liver of a Hen gentle dame, will suffice me; for alas I am a poor wretched underling, and no provincial man, neither warden of my company. At the first these celestial seeds-men meant no hurt to the Queen's most excellent Majesty nor her realm; but that which was more dear unto her to hold, as I said before, than her life, that they would seek to pull from her without offence Dunstable. Thanks be to God for her godly resolution. Happy is that bird that hath her nest so shut up and fenced in, that no destroyers can enter to spoil her and her tender loving ones. What considerations or hearts carry they, that desire to subject their Sovereign to foreign Pottentates? Or how should it come to pass, that the bonds of breeding should bind less, than the corrupt promises and rewards of other nations? Woe worth such wicked proselytes that have made themselves strangers and aliens from their own countries, suffering themselves to be won to other religion and obedience, then that which God and their Prince commandeth: subjecting themselves to two tyrants, that go about to crush and grind to powder all the nations of the Christian world, thinking none meet to possess them but their own merciless selves. What worse or more blusterous devils can there be, than such as forsake their religion with detestation, for a deadly some of money? Hud. Have you forgotten, how judas Iscariot for the covetise of money, of his own accord, betrayed his master? Dunst. No verily. Hud. Then think that men may be drawn by means where they want true breeding, and right bringing up; especially when there is so busy a counsel held abroad about the matter in the devilish convocation house of Bishop Caiphas at Rome, whither the Scribes and pharisees swarm daily, crying; Let us murder her, she is not for our purpose. Besides, thither resort Pilate his servants also, who at any conditions, are ready to be hired, to lay violent hands on the Lords anointed marked for his principal members and defenders of his infallible truth. Nothing but murder will quench their insatiable thirst, as appeared by the jacobines most irreligious sacrificing of the Christian King Henry of France last deceased; the day of which horrible deed doing, is hallowed, and called at Rome the day of the gladness of their hearts, where they mingle and confer devilish counsels with our men, whom they keep there, with itching hands and tickling fingers already stirred up to attempt violence against her, whom God of his goodness thus far hath made invincible against all terrors, promising still to keep his beloved safe from the danger of all practices and conspiracies whatsoever. Dunsta. I pray you sir recite your example of judas, which I partly remember, yet understand not the matter so fully as I am persuaded you are able to teach it. Hud. judas you know, in title and profession, was a familiar household servant with the Lord; but in affection of heart as appeared a wild enemy. He wanted no cherishing at his masters hand, neither at any time received displeasure of the Lord, whereby to conceive ill opinion or to bear grudge, malice, or evil will towards him: yet ravening covetousness so gripped him at the heart, that he ran headlong through covetousness into traitorism. These Romish jews so rejoice when they can meet with a tragical judas, that will venture to play a desperate part, to put out both his own eyes, in hope to take away a little sight from another, and that against God's eternal determination. Such is their malicious hatred against God and godliness, that they are never without men, especially chosen to betray unto death the sacred person of her whom all ages and times shall repent the loss of, whensoever God in his justice shall visit our sins with that universal scourge and infliction. Dunst. Me thinks the thought hereof in their bitterest furies should renew love, and prick the consciences of them that go about any such attempts, so as they should not be able to continue in their madness, yea the whole frame and workmanship of nature should tremble at so horrible a deed of unnatural cruelty. Hudd. Had her most excellent Majesty carried a meaning to have entertained displeasures sought and brought home unto her, how might she have dilated and enlarged her kingdoms in circuit, upon just causes and worthy conceivings? But almighty God, who delighteth not in shedding of Christian blood, hath exercised her heart in harmless thoughts, defenceable delights, and aiding powers, graciously contented with honours and kingdoms deserved, not at all disposed to any small things usurped. Thus you see, whither the zeal of my heart hath carried me to matters of an other sort. Had it not been for marring my Lord's sport, and thereby to have endangered yourself a leasing, long ere this you would have hallowed me in from my counter-hunting. Dunst. Your words have so drawn the consent of my heart unto them, that even this busy harvest time, I could be contented to lose a weeks work, and take it for the truest hunting I was at any grass time in my life. I think I shall never forget your Friar Ferret and his close hunting to the liver at the first, without ruffling a feather of his dames Chick. Had I been the good man, I should have coped off the knaves privy tithes, for censuring my house with his relics. Huddle. Had you the like care to your soul, as she had, you would beware to offend such holy men. But you are one of those that had rather live well I perceive, then to have the Pope's blessing. Dunst. Were I not cast into heaviness with grieving at my ungracious son, I could match your old Friar with a new limmiter of later days, but my mind is so carefully set upon him and his unreasonable mother together, that unless I be aided through your worship's good counsel, it will hasten my death, but especially his mother, her fond importunacy maketh me restless both night and day. Hud. If it be equinoctium with your wife now, it will wear away, as the nights and days grow longer or shorter. But I think you mean the virtuous spirit within you, which is said never to cease working in good men. Other rest it appeareth you want not, for meat-health, and sleepe-health you seem to have, else could not your stomach distribute nourishment to such parts as show to be fresh and well liking within you. Dun. The hope of my restoring, is under God in your worship. Hud. To ask me counsel, is to seek help of a sick Physician: nevertheless, such as it is, it shall not be wanting to my good friend▪ Methought you were in mind to turn off your son. Dun. Yea surely, & so I think it best still. Hu. Do you take it by casting him up to all hazards, by such masteries to calm his rough qualities? or rather thereby shall you not raise a greater tempest of evils more like to overwhelm him, making him thereby a clean alien from virtue, & so of a prodigal child to become a graceless Cain? Surgeons that mean well to their cures, where the flesh is severed by a green wound, or blow new given, rather seek to close up that tenderly which is already torn, them cut the same out wider or longer, to make the patiented further off from help and restoring. Tailors in like manner do not mend one pain by rending more, but rather stitch up that they found first broken. Clouterly Tinkers only mar where they should mend. When fire is all out in your house to a little spark, you do not by and by stamp your foot, or cast water upon that which remaineth, but rather seek to repair the same, by adding such succours & increasings as may renew that little. There is also a certain spark or seed of virtue ever remaining in man, in spite as they say of the devil, unless reprobacie have overrun all. Seek to find that in your son: with good looking to and wise handling, it may take deeper root than at the first, and so by the blessing of God, bring forth both branches and fruits of virtue. Dun. Your worship's voutchsafing strong and friendly aids to my weak cogitations, oppressed with wearisome doubts, have put me in more comfort than I fear me I shall find cause to hope for in him. Hud. Let it not repent you to play the wise father, gaining him by little and little yourself. If you had a hay barn, or a mault-house crazed, or leaning too much to the one side, you would not in a rage pull it down and burn it, but rather underprop it with studs and timber crouches, till you were better able to build it up again. Can you not with the same patience use remedies and means to support your sons infirmities till you may frame them better to your mind? Though you cannot at the first make him good, do your best to abate his evils; then seek to provide how they also may do the least hurt. One while use the authority of a Father, another-while the command of a Master, at another time the love of a friend. Thus you shall have cause to hope better of him by holding in his cheeks, with the snaffle and rains in your own hands, then by sending him to seek wild adventures with this short passport; Go be packing & see thou hang thyself quickly. Dun. Surely sir, his own conditions are like enough to be his warrant to Newgate, and from thence without a passport he shall be safe conducted to Tyburn by a sort of honest men, who will not stick to cut down the hangman and him both for their coats. For me to seek virtues in vice his storehouse, it were foolish to believe, and dangerous to follow. He that hath catc●…t a liberty to live at his own lust, little thinketh that the authority of a father belongeth to him. By that he eateth, drinketh and sleepeth at my cost, so far hereckoneth me to be his father but farther he neither esteemeth nor regardeth me. Since his peevish mother will not suffer my black Ox to tread on his foot, I will send him where he shall be glad to draw in the black Ox his yoke. I hear there is a press forth for men to serve the Queen, God willing I will make suit to our deputy Lieutenants that he may be one: for it is the best free school I can find to prompt wit into a braggart fool. Hud. Neighbour, I am beholding unto you for your ready speeches, not borrowing you phrases abroad amongst flatterers you tell me it is foolish to believe, and dangerous to follow my counsel, it is marvel you lest out your proverb, how every man can rule a shrew save he that hath her. The difference betwixt you and me this while hath not held, whether he were my son or yours, nor and if I were in your case, it must of necessity follow I should be of your mind. By the like mistaking you may nextly charge me to bolster out your son in his misdemeanours against you his Father. Because we are in a Park, I will use a hunting term, and so make away the game thus, wherein yourself shall still be judge. See therefore in few words what I go about, which is to have you consider, whether it be better in time to foresee, than after to sorrow without remedy. Myself am also a Father, and know the effects of nature. Therefore though the case be your own, see you prove not partial nor wilful, playing Demia his part, to be extreme against reason. Further, in truths behalf I conjure you not to be conceited, thinking nothing well said or done, but what yourself do or devise. It is not your riddling with the one Ox his treading, and the other Ox his drawing, that must cast a father headlong into a rage against the son, but rather it fitteth you better, discerningly to look upon him with your own clear eyes, and not to behold him with your wife her weak and glimpsing sight, nor with the world's dazzled shadows, but I say, behold him in a pure and right understanding of your own; then may you examine in differently whether your son have that in him you never had when you were of his years: or whether in your conscience the same might not have chanced unto you, provoked and misled by the like unworthy occasions. Then add a regard also to the possibility and likelihood of removing them by your jurisdiction and example, imposing always upon him things conformable to his nature. If a Physician can cure a sick man well may you recover a whole man. Wise Physicians never give the sick patient any kind of medicine without choice but rather seek chiefly to match their medicine to the quality of the sick his disease. Wherefore think not to frame a rectitude of life in your son, by applying unto his nature inconveniences. Dunst. Where a matter is thus plainly set out, a blind man need not err in judgement, unless he will be false to himself. I am bound not only to thank your worship, but rather compelled to reckon you the disposer and author of my sons and my health. Where you conditioned with me to look upon him with my own eyes, thereby I am put in mind to think him present, and to stand directly before us: for no child can more nearly resemble a father in outward lineaments, than he doth me. His better conditions according to your declaration in the Gentleman of blood, are I think bred with him also, he hath them so rightly from me: but his evil behaviours, they at no time had custom or privilege in me. Yet I must confess, there wanted no proneness in my own dispotion and ready mind, to have entertained or ventured on the like: but such a diligent father I had to keep me upright from swerving, as I am persuaded was not easy to be found. His manner of fashioning and subjecting me favourably unto him, to introduct and make me afterwards to stand in his good opinion, was of this sort. Had I been complained of for doing shrewdnesses in the time of my waggish youth, himself would cheerfully have excused my negligence, had not my fault been too manifest an evil Through which he would also take occasion to breathe such good things unto me, as my tender years might best brook. Showing withal, what he misliked in others, and what he required at my hands, together with the honesty he would have me respect. By which the love he held me in was more, than an awe to hold me back from committing what might discredit me unto him. In his absence likewise, another profit was also coming towards me, by directing his servants to note unto me, the evil fame that such of mine acquaintances were of, as had rob by the high way, made ruffianly frays, or through any other riots, had outraged against law. They were in like sort commanded, to set out to the uttermost unto me, the notoriousness of such young men's parts, as had prodigally wasted their patrimonies, extinguishing thereby their succeeding posterities, robbing besides their ancestors and themselves of worthy name and fame. Those abject and contemptuous wickednesses thus demonstrated unto me, fashioned such a form of obedience and fear to beware in me, that I thought myself straightly bound in duty, to show the news hereof to my Father at his home coming, to glad him, with my mislike of all such crimes, as the obligations and pledges of my own well-doing, by my detesting them, thus accused and condemned unto me, who could by no colour of excuse be purged. This would have strooken such a present joy into his heart, to hear me give sentence of such impenitent castaways, as witnessed his no small favour and grace towards me. Notwithstanding all this to observe me thoroughly, that no fraud or guile might be intended, by ill disposition against my well doing, through his indulgency, when I faulted in deed against these prescriptions, without translating his accustomed countenances or outward affections towards me, he would wisely and profitably I must confess for me, conspire with my Schoolmaster to give me the uttermost rigour of his justice. Which done, I bewraying by my looks whose hands I had been under, my father strait in my sight, and hearing, would so rebuke and take up the false Grammarian for admitting such smart figures into his school, that I thought myself ever after past whipping, till the next examining day, than my father's pardon came ever after my execution. Now sir, when I grew up nearer unto man's estate, he let me have all such things in my power, as were fit for me to be trusted withal: Even than also himself, carrying a respect unto such things as he thought might miscarry and perish for want of experience and governance in me. Thus continually I was held in such love and delight in him, that so long as I might, and while he lived, I could never find in my heart to departed from him. But had not the good temper of your sharp counsels, opened a cranney in my flinty forehead, the sweet & pleasant thought of these things, had been lost in me for ever, they being as fast locked up in my forgetful and dull head, as the marrow within my bones. Huddle. You do well to show me my faults, and the difference in comparison between you and me. The heart of a fool flieth out at his mouth, but the mouth of a wise man is locked up in his heart. Notwithstanding, I am well enough pleased and contented, to be open breasted to my good friend; concluding this matter thus: sithence you cannot like a God, dive and look into your son his heart and meaning; by the light of reason have recourse to that you may see. Dunstable. Your worship hath seasoned my heart with most wholesome and expedient teachings, so as now I find that part of my mind whole, sound, and fit to be pierced, which even now for the soreness and grief made by a fresh wound, I could not suffer nor abide to be touched or come near. Huddle. It is your pleasure to attribute unto me more than I deserve, but to give you your due right, I have not talked with a man this great while, that was so well furnished with sufficient matter, in himself contained, to repair all his preiudices and hindrances. Dunstable. Now Sir, I would I might put you in mind of your London news, for I am sure according to your accustomed manner, you have frequented and used the ordinaries where they are to be heard, and those of all sorts. Huddle. I confess I have delighted and taken much pleasure in such places: and the rather, for their companies sakes, which were the occasion of my so doing. Now they be worn away and gone, my fantasy to frequent such houses and ordinaries, hath also ceased: yet this last term, through some certain occasion, I was at one. But my entertainment there pleased me not so well, as that I could be entreated or invited thither again. Dunst. Why I beseech you sir, are they not ordered in meat and attendance after the seemly sort they were wont, or else are not the company pleasing unto you? Hud. To say truly, there wants no performance in those that keep them: and as for the company that use them, there can be no more choice Gentlemen, to accompany and delight the best Lord in a land. Yet it was my ill hap the time I was there, being a mere stranger to the whole presence, to be set upon, by one who was crept in, under the countenance of some young master, that was desirous to try what sport a Canary bird could make for a blanched Almond, (at his own finding fed with husks.) Had his discretion been any thing, his wit might have been tolerable. Dunst. It is very likely, such free places must sometimes be pestered with such persons of necessity, to offend some on purpose, to delight other some, making also a shifting living of their base profession. I remember Terence saith, that refreshing by meats, drinks, and other money costs, will make a bold Parasite impudent. And Plautus saith; God have mercy hunger-starved belly for such forlorn jests. There can hardly be found a more insufficient fault, that may concern one man to another, then for him that hath wit, to make himself mad with outrageous folly, offending them that give no cause. How do they pull their meat out of the fire, that so confirm themselves fools for one days dinner? Now you being a stranger unto him, and without offence in yourself, I can but marvel, how Adam Meri mouth his voluntary could run upon you. Hud. The principal matter I think was, he found himself strong to set upon, and myself of lest show in the house, and so the weakest to resist. Dunst. What a miserable thing is it, for one that hath wit, to give himself leave grossly to offend; or for a man to do hurt with commendable things marring a good wit, with a rebrobate tongue? I long to hear how he could pick out his commodity from out you, whether by prepared matter on purpose devised against some one that used the place and was wanting, or how otherwise I beseech you to show me. Hud. I can conjecture no other thing, but the very contempt of me in comparison of himself. For without my speaking to him, he began to praise the Satin of my cloak, the same you saw me wear yesterday at my Lords: saying, it was very durable stuff, and as he thought by the fashion, not unmade this hundred of years, neither of my own bestowing on myself, but rather left me as an heyre-lome from my ancestors. To this I gave no ear at all, to show how unwilling I was to match myself with such a vice upon the stage, with him to become guilty of offending the Gentlemen, who deserved better to be pleased at my hands, for good show of courtesies by salutations given me at my coming in amongst them. Notwithstanding my giving back and forbearance, at the first entrance of dinner he caroused another full mouthed jest unto me, remembering in his cup, the yeoman of my wardrobe, whom he said had deserved the lease of a very good farm, for his well looking to the monument on my back. Then to satisfy the Gentlemen, that I had deserved to have no such counterfeit badge pinned on mysleeve, I answered as near unto the property of his speech as I could (not having had to do with the like Hare-headed fellow before) that it was not only necessary to have a good thing, but also expedient to use it well. By occasion of which speech, altogether against my will, he was trained into a vain of his own idle and lewd speaking: insomuch, that a Gentleman by whom I sat, offended with the tediousness of his undecent communication corrupting honest behaviour, whispered in my ear, that it was a monstrous thing to see so young a man want his teeth. Whereat I marveled not a little, knowing by the others continual gaping he could not choose but see them. To take away my doubt, and to stop his lavish proceeding in odious speaking he said: that Pies and Daws did chatter, & make an irksome noise in the time of their feeding, but men, who were endued with reason, to moderate the use of things was not the custom amongst them, in such offensive sort to exercise their tongues. He being by this caveat put out of the pace wherein he was wont to post without a guide, became dumb, and as it were tired at the instant. Dunst. Such a wasp I have heard John Pace was, whose rending of jests within the lists cost his flesh much torment in earnest: yet he remained all one man for the whip could not come at that by racing the flesh, which through custom was crept into the bones. Dun. If he could have juggled withal, there had been some pleasure and delight to have been taken in him Hud. If that would make you merry perhaps he could both do that, and run upon a rope also. If you list to make experience, it is possible you may meet him on Salisbury plain, to play fast and lose with your Bristowe-faire budget. Dunst. For my part, I had rather hear tell he were fast tied up where I could wish him then in any place let lose where I may have to do. Had there been none by laughing to have supported his gross rudeness, who are as good as commissions sealed to such companions, himself would never have been so palpably gross especially having such a wit as you allowed to be in him even now. But I pray you sir, was not his coat made of Scogging his fashion? Hud. I protest I understand you not. Dunstable. Not to come out at the back door upon you, in plain meaning, of this sort and fashion was always Scogging his coat made. Whatsoever shape or stuff the rest of the garment had, the sleeves were always one extreme shot the other exceeding long, which gave the world to understand, he was never without a long wit, and a short discretion. Besides him there are diverse yet of my knowledge. who make it their full felicity to scorn any man his sufficiency, whosoever jump not rightly with them in all their lofty tricks of wasteful consuming. But this Parasite, without displeasure to you, meant to make some Gentleman in the company his own, for whom he prepared himself to be laughed at. Without doubt, me thinks Gentlemen in deed should suffer no such beastly wits to make gain of them. I have heard there are a sect and company of them, who have a special resorting place, called Scorners hall, where there are created Masters, wardens and other inferiors, all of one livery and fraternity. Hud. It cannot be chosen, but their rents come in very easily. Dunst. I will show you what prefferreth them, and how men of this faculty are chosen to office. Huddle. I think I can save you a labour, unless it be otherwise with them then in all other companies, for they are preferred and chosen as they follow one another in time and ability of get. For my part, I see not why plenty of scoffs and jests should not make free, and promote to office, any foreigner in this faculty. Dunst. Well sir, you need no guide to beat your paths, who can chalk out your own way so perfectly yourself: yet it shall not repent me, to stir the stern in a calm, to keep fresh a more worthy Pilot, to bring the ship into a safe port when a storm shall arise. Hud. The year goeth about, ere you can bring the Bride from out her tiring house. Dunstable. At once to bewray the simpleness of my meaning, without colours or imbrodering, when the principallest of this mystery hath been collocated in the highest dignity, as to have sitten in scorners chair, than all fantastical young green wits, must of necessity congratulate him a far of, solemnly inviting him to dinner and supper taking especial heed they neither Tom, jack, nor Wat him, as they do other apprentices in their liberal Arto, for it is very penal in the stabbing law. Hud. I take them notwithstanding their Sprusenesse, by your leave, for no better than good every days fools, so being none of their counsels, not subject to their babbling benches. Dunst. May it now please you to be put in mind of your London news, which my scattering questions have all this while hindered? Hud. Since I have consented unto you in your other desires, I will not refuse to satisfy you therein also. There is a most strange report made unto the world, of a Gentleman his manner of life and death, lately deceased in the City, the copy whereof I have here, and must be feign to recite the saineunto you, my ragged writing being, as it is, so troublesome to read. Dunstable. I pray you Sir, first show what sort and quality he was of, and also his name, if I may be so bold to desire it. Huddle. His parentage not of the meanest, in living rather equal with the best, then inferior to many within the degree of Gentlemen. His name I havenot heard recited, but for sect and conversation, a mere Epicurean Atheist. Dunstable. How kept he his lands? was he any waster or spender of them? Huddle. Surely he lessened not the quantity of his heritage, but his dissolute and voluptuous spend, were many degrees worse than the wasting of Patrimonies. Form the exercise of virtues, great sums and massies of treasure are oftentimes laudably dispended. His minner of carriage was exceeding haughty, himself hollow within, of small discretion, yet of great pride to aspire upwards, to matters too great and tempestuous for him to wield or become: placing his whole felicity in the practices or rather devices of new and strange pleasures, having never in any part of his life bestowed time in the doing deeds of arms, nor at any hand willing to hear or allow the praises of any man's notable virtues. Dunst. How could such a one recreate himself, being so absolutely ill, as neither to use good parts, nor to endure the praises of worthy men? Little could such a Sathanist want of reprobacie, to live thus in contempt of God and man. methinks he should also be at defiance with nature, and so place his delights in strange, prodigious, and monstrous things. Hud. You have not much mistaken the condition of the man: for every one hath a chief desire to some one thing or other, wherein the delight must be entertained, either in matters worthy or unworthy to be beloved. Dunst. It is odds, the ugly vices that were like to be in him, even hastily started his soul from out his body, before the natural and appointed time of her departure. Hud. You have spoken herein more wisely than perhaps ye be ware of: no doubt there are diverse things within a man, which appear not, like as natural causes do, that shorten, and as it were murder nature untimely. Look as water the enemy to fire, quencheth the same when she cometh at it, so doth disorderly government, laying surfeit upon surfeit, till evils be multiplied so far in a man's body, that remedies there can be found none, because the little spark of life is so overwhelmed and raked up under a huge heap of diseases. For after distemperature hath engendered disease, and surfeit nourished it, continually using the same custom of wasting and consuming blood, disease cometh to be so confirmed, that no medicine can come at the first cause, to take away or thrust the grief out of the body. Look when the stomach is made heavy by violent occasions, appetite ceasing, the blood of life must also perish and decay: so death unnaturally purchased untimely destroyeth life. Dunst. These good teachings God willing, shall prove counsels to me, not to oppress nature with unruly and continual feeding, or by overdoing otherwise to her prejudice. Hud. What you come short of me in knowledge I perceive not, your words I see are of a physical conjugation, which because you pretend ignorance, I will help you to decline. Unruly governance, you shall perceive, was the confusion and certain pouring out of this Gentleman's life. For they that make no discreet choice of the meats and drinks they take, neither of the exercises of their bodies, but suffer immoderate sleep, & superabounding diet, to kill the quick dispositions of their constitutions, which should have been nourished by the moderate use of those refresh: let such riotous wasters of themselves, look for no help from the Physicians to linger out their days, but rather untimely death, or continual helpless sickness. Dunst. Your words put me in mind of this old proverb; Either a fool or a Physician. He that prodigally with greedy lust, followeth sensual appetite, surcharging nature with continual superfluities, him I take to be the fool thus meant. He that can ordinately moderate his respects, by due governance, bridling his appetitious desires, and unsatiable pleasures, contrary to this largeness, him I take to be the Physician. There is also another deadly delectation, which I think, breedeth both fools and Physicians: by that sweet bait without avoidance, we are tickled on to untimely death, unless by wholesome preparatives of continency, we meet and go against that sore disease called lechery. By her the seed of life's best digested substance & marrow goeth from us, which should feed life, according to our first creation and nature. Hud. Take heed, whilst you think to speak wisely, you err not in greater matters, than those we were in hand with. There is another intellect, of far more worthy creation in man, that was first fashioned, ere that carnal fleshly gross matter was compact, who brought with it a perfection beyond our understanding & reason, which seethe all things in us, and herself not seen at all of us: yet through the vigour of her force, we have a light of the knowledge of truth contained in her: which as it was first made, so shall it perpetually be. The other caducail fleshly matter, whether it be blood, sinews, veins, or the secret treasure of life, so called by you, it had neither the first nor the like admirable beginning that this had, therefore mistermed by you, to be the first creation or nature in man. Dunst. I have been so sufficiently taught already that I cannot err herein. Yourself have proved, that all other things, as virtues themselves, a man may have from his parents, who under God are the workers of natural things in their children, either mediate or immediately. Now sir, for the infusion of souls, I hope no Christian man is ignorant, that the knowledge of those divine matters, proceed only and altogether miraculously from Almighty God, yet the same not so excellent nor so divine a creature from him, that it should equal or exceed it maker. But I am sorry, the adding my foolish words to a matter so sufficiently understood, should take away the occasion offered you, to show unto me the pestilent evils, that delicious vice lechery stealeth upon us, rotting our bodies while we are alive, offending thereby all that come near us, with our unwholesome brimstone breathes, which are feign to be abated and corrected with powders perfumed else could we not endure ourselves, whose rutting conditions have made these rammish faults, and not wise and temperate nature. You have made so good show of your wit in describing that matter already, in such sort, that there needeth no further declaration thereof so that there resteth only now, use of your memory to restore us to the matter we have thus long digressed from. Dunst. If you think good, the paper in your hand will prove the remembrancer. Hud. It shall so be, but first you must imagine, it speaketh of the highest pattern of pride that hath been in a world, pleasing himself always with the jollity of opinion that all conclusions, counsels and knowledges, were within himself, and that he needed neither conference, help or succour, of any other man's wit, but that he was ordamed by his own aids to reach into mysteries, either natural or supernatural, and so, as I say, mighty enough in his own cunning to confirm and resolve himself notwithstanding the mystery, subtlety, or intricatnesse of any controversy whatsoever. The same easy and contemptible opinion he held of all creatures, the like also he did of God himself. Dunst. I pray you also let me once more stay the matter, with ask what religion he was of. Hud. But that I know you mean plainly, I have great cause to doubt you mock me, inquiring such a man his religion, hearing him thus described. Until I have read this writing, hold yourself contented, to think he was an ace worse than julian the Apostata; he yet at the last cast while his bowels were dropping out before him, feeling the secret judgements of God sent down upon the blasphemer could in the induratenesse of his heart, cry out and acknowledge the Galilean to be a conqueror over all godless Giants. Thus begin the words according to the tenure of my copy.  
The strange and monstrous life and death, of a vertulesse recreant, who this other day made himself a notable spectable to all proud lofty tyrants, blasphemous devils, and voluptuous Epicures, together with his speeches to his servants at his deadly sickness, first taking him. Hereafter followeth also his soul's farewell, and forsaking the body. Escript. Gogswounds, a pox on that damned Ghost, I think the Bawd hath poisoned me, Gog's heart, sicker and sicker, oh that I had the hellish hag here, to torment her ere I die. Oh my heart and all cometh up together. Lord have mercy upon me, oh good God, oh sweet jesus, help me, I shall die, I shall die: james, go desire master Doctor to come pray with me, and for my sinful soul. Go when I bid you, and bring him suddenly. Thomas. How fareth it with my master, james? james. I think he be out of his wits, he ailed nothing when he went to supper, now he hath overcharged his stomach after his old fashion, he crieth out she hath poisoned him, she hath poisoned him. Surely he is thoroughly in to night, for I never knew until now, but a pipe of Tobacco, or a little warm water taking, would have helped him. Doth he call this drinking of healths? pledge them that will, I mean not to entertain into my body, any such curious accidents, as bring with them passionate sicknesses, for a little overflowing kindness. But my master I am persuaded, finds himself drunk to night of the devil his cup, and must needs have a Preacher in all the haste, to raise that the devil hath thrown down. For my part, I am ashamed to bring a divine into such a polluted place of turmoil, as my master hath made his chamber Yet glad I have gotten so good an occasion to be out of the ill savours and stinks I was vexed withal even now. But Thomas, list how he calleth upon God, this gear worketh to the purpose, it hath made his head so full of waves, that by his floating prayers, and calling upon God, I fear it will breed madness in the end. He was not wont in his perfect mind to remember God on this fashion. Maist. james, what james, let the knave alone, I will none of the babbling fool, hang him he will but tell me a tale of three in one, and all one, I will none of the juggler ●…. james. Yea marry Thomas, now my master beginneth to mend, list how he sweareth and raileth again, after his old fashion. I see well now there is no danger in him: I thought his head was but tottie. Maist. james give me a pipe of that Trinidatho Tobacco, lack brought me yesterday from my brother Robin, the other is too bitter, I like it not. So, now I will prove if I can catch a sleep; shut the door, but go not far from me. Thomas. How goeth the world now james with my master? jam. It is to be doubted he draweth homewards, he fetcheth his wind so short: now I begin to fear indeed he hath met with some false measure, for he burneth so hot, that it cannot be but his blood sweateth within him, & that he is stung with an Aspis. Thom. Doubtless, if your words be true he either hath eaten black pottage, or else hath swallowed down a Ches nut whole, for I hear he heaveth and fetcheth hard to remove it, but it will not be raised. jam. Help, help, Thomas, my master is in a swond. Alas he is in a lethargy, draw the Curtains, and let in the air. Thom. No, rather he is in a frenzy, shut the windows & keep out the light. jam. Sir, for the passion of God, let nothing trouble you: she loveth you too well, to play such a part by you, who are her chief friend, and all her maintainer, if she were here, this would prove a heavy sight unto her. Good sir, hurt not yourself, by misdeeming her, whose thoughts I dare swear, are harmless towards you. It is but a qualm, you shall overcome it well enough. Thomas, go fetch bay Friesland hither, my master will ride abroad and take the air, bid the Falconer bring hither the Barbary tassel, my master will see her fly. I beseech you sir, show us some comfort of your well doing. Here is your chain of Pearl, pleaseth it you to put that on? Here is your hat with the bruche of Diamonds, will you have it? Here is your Popenjoy, take her on your fist, prattle bird, prattle to master. Here are your Monkeys, play with them. Shall I fetch you your cloak with rich buttons? and if you will sit up in your bed, I will reach you the looking-glass: if you saw yourself, there were no cause why you should despair. But behold, in good time sir, here is Master Doctor your Physician come, speak unto him, and he will help you. Doctor. james, let him alone, trouble him not, he is entering the gates of death, her shadow hath overspread him. Thrice before this time I have been with him, to forewarn him, that misrule and disordered diet would shorten his days He hath a dead Palsy all over his body, I must needs be gone: james, farewell, there is scant one hours life left in him. james. See Thomas the course of this world, spite of Arts maintenance, and Physics diligence, to day an Emperor, to morrow dead. Hud. You must imagine the man already dead, whom the Physicians give over. Upon this it is to be supposed, his servants they voided the chamber, and prepare their lots ready, to draw cuts how to deceive most, and who to begin first. Like good fellows, they must agree within themselves, to part stakes evenly; least by their falling out, the true owners come by their right. Dun. Had he made no will in his life time, to direct his goods? his lands I know can want no heirs. Hud. Think you a man thus dissolute could set any thing in order, himself so far out of frame? Now followeth the difference between the soul & the body, at the time of their separation. Soul. Proud voluptuous caitiff, woe worth the time I was destined to dwell in thee. Fowl lump of lead, have I been thy handmaid, attending on thee night and day, always quickening to my power thy slow and dull capacity, setting before thee to exercise thy heavy and downward disposition, beautiful heavens, the rich substance of thy omnipotent maker, and why wouldst thou not there behold signs and wonders, sufficient causes to have made thee know and delight in the power and Majesty of our Almighty workmaster, exceeding all Arts and understandings? How often would I have had thee occupied in beholding the sun that admired glory of the heavens? Commended not I also unto thy brutishness, the innumerable number of stars, rare ornaments of the same? In like manner opened not I unto thee the Moon, her revolutions and changes, and by her the whole years seasons? Dull-eard as thou art did not I beside prompt into thee wit and knowledge how to guide thyself under them? How often did I flatter thee, to have enticed thy gross senses to adore that wonderful greatness? sturdy block, thou wouldst neither bow nor incline to him. Told I not thee also in time and at the beginning, what thy foolish coveting liberty and contempt of his power, would bring us unto? By thy earthly and careless rest, thou hast purchased to thyself mortal death, and to me immortal unrest and torment. Have I this for my reward, to be killed for quickening and comforting thee? Did I sue to get thine eyes placed in thy forehead, to see before, and in time to the behoof of us both, that we might not repent us after and too late? Hast thou also cast them behind thee, and made them look downward to delight in the old rotten and corrupt grandam earth? I was fashioned according to the circumspect undefiled mirror of the majesty of God, and after the Image of his goodness. I was conveyed into thee a heavenly and a beautiful soul, but thy wickedness hath given me my deformities, & made me also foolish. I found but a little spark of fire in thee, not sufficient to minister or to convey needful things to nature, to keep her warm withal: but now I have increased and kindled that little, all is on fire, & so have committed that I repent me of. Being sufficient from my maker, in myself at the first, extending now that power too far, am become so weak, that I am able neither to help myself nor thee, letting my wilful boldness work my destruction. When I entered into thee, I laboured with diligence to have married thee unto me, but thou wouldst not suffer me to commune lovingly with thee, about matters of everlasting memorial, and salvation of us both. Thou hast been a heavy lump unto me, keeping down my cogitations, which were always musing upon the holy Ghost, his descending down into our heart, to have warmed our frozen zeal that was settled there. Hadst thou observed the charge I brought with me, which was for all thy maker's benefits, to love and fear him. Had we entertained, that we had been safe: that loving fear would have kept us so in our maker's favour, that we should have been preserved there still, under the surety thereof, till we had been brought back again whence I came, to everlasting life. Woe worth such a mansion and habitation as I have endured with thee, the bitter and tedious fellowip I have had with thee, hath been void of all joy and consolation. Ah foolish Adam, that thou wert no better settled, but shrankest away at the first temptation, suffering the Serpent to take from the image of God obedience and love, which thou wert commanded to exercise thyself in. Thou wert too fond to believe one witness against thyself, and that one a weak, and an unsufficient woman, against whom by law thou mightest have excepted. Nay then too wicked Eva, that thou wouldst so hastily credit one, & he a serpent, thus to be taken with delight & delicious show, esteeming appearance, & neglecting substance. When thou wert deceived, hadst thou none to persuade but thy master Adam, whom thyself shouldst have feared and obeyed, and not tempted and beguiled? Were there not works of God's hands enough also beside, and those above thy capacity, but thou must meddle & entangle thy wit with that secret and forbidden understanding, even wittingly thereby to perish in peril? No Adam, it was not thou, nor the Serpent that hurt me, it was the woman: we were taken out of that offence & could not beware, but that we must be bound again with the chains of darkness, & that by a woman. While I kept thee from knowledge to in them, thou riddest without spurs, & couldst by thyself strongly lay hold on the rains. But after thou hadst trodden their paths, how soon wert thou fallen into Solomon his deep pit? When thou hadst once seen the daughters of destruction, how long was it ere thou wert taken with their snares? How often did I bid thee take example by Ulysses, to stop thy ears, not at all to hear their poisoned charms, which had power to change thy form into the shape and condition of Swine, wherein whole legions of devils delight to dwell? Before thou wert alured by them, decent apparel, mannerly to fit and become thy body, to keep out and defend offensive and hurtful things to the same, would have contented thee. Now shirts of a hundredth marks a piece, waistcoats of the like value, ill favouredly to dishonest the wearers, besides other attiring of too exceeding cost, will not suffice to corrupt and deprave our counterfeit and disguising grossness. Before thou wert up-growne to this vice (pouring out the sap and pith of thy body upon this appetitie, from which thou wouldst not refrain thine affections) temperate diet within measure, according to nature's mediocrity, would also have sufficed to have kept thy body in better health and vigour, with these outrages, through which thou hast lost the mastery of thyself. Now the whole air, sea, and land, besides the compounds or additaments of Art, will not suffice to uphold & maintain thy immoderate lust. Before thou lost thy understanding, and committedst thyself to bodily and fleshly government, wholesome and nourishing meats, according to nature's indifferency, would have contented thee: now all the Artificers, that belong or owe any kind of suit, to the puddle house or foul place of carnal delights, can scarcely find out or invent one, pleasing dish to thy tumbling appetite, thus rolled up and down in fleshly delights. Oh how happy hadst thou been, if thou couldst have commanded a new creation of creatures, acceptable to thy delights, that they might have gnawed upon them also! O very plant of sin, that it was my destiny to be dwell with thee, that hast made thy throat the Sepulchre of sin, and thy body a den of devils! Even now through the vehemency of thy sickness, thou hadst a desire to call upon God, but how soon did thy foul spirit within thy heart damn up thy mouth again? Hadst thou not been possessed with the custom of sinning, prayers had broken the prison of thy adversary the devil, as witnesseth Paul and Sylas, at whose prayers the foundations of the prison were shaken, the jail door set open, and they loosed of their bonds at Phillipi in Macedonia. Had thy prayers been effectual, thou hadst shaken off an enemy upon the earth, and found a friend in heaven: but they were forced and constrained, thy devotion being covered with the darkness of sin. But why complain I of thee, when myself, agreed to hearken and give care unto their enticings? and was as willing to corrupt the state and place my maker gave me, as thou wert? I was married to thee in thy childhood, and ere thou camest into the world. I had my months growings as thou hadst, and delivered thence as thou wert. It is I that have transgressed, and it is I that have cast us both into mortal darkness. Thou wert not the prison nor Gailor unto me. I had a large gallery in thee to walk, thou wert the chariot wherein I triumphed, but I committed the ruledome thereof to two violent guides, the one called riotous or prosperous Luxury, the other, lofty or stately Pride, through which two Adamants the devil drew me with his charms wholly into his possession, whereas at the first, replenished with all grace, I was subject to no necessity of sin. We thought our maker's commandments had been strait yokes, too heavy for us to bear: whereupon the devil, a ready help at all desperate and murmuring assays, gave us counsel to seek liberty, and to be free as all other creatures were. An acceptable thing to obtain, but dangerous to seek by way of perdition, by wandering alone without a guide, amongst enemies destitute of all aids. Through this headlong way we have purchased unto ourselves great captivity. Did we seek liberty? why we had a large liberty to do well, and that was all that we were commanded to do, which we called yokes, hardly imposed upon us. Contrary to this, we sought a liberty to do ill, whither going on without returning, we have pulled a weight upon us, the burden whereof is intolerable. Our unnatural leaving and despising our principal guide by furious appetite, striving to usurp, break, and bring under, that which should have been our Sovereign, by forbidden desires coveting that we should not have desired, we are become the servants of lust, and so deprived and cut off from being a branch of the tree of everlasting life, from whence we were first sprung out. How often were these forewarning speeches pronounced unto us, from the most excellent spirit of the Almighty? Satisfy yourselves, look what you covet is impossible for you to have; you being subject members from the beginning, break not the law of your creation. How much better had it been for us to have carried thankful minds for the innumerable benefits received and enjoyed, then thus to have rebelled a fresh against the host of redemption, who by his meek sufferings took away the first sting of death, and anointed us again with the oil of grace? Unworthy that we are, had we but carried thankful minds, humbly and lovingly to have respected his merciful sufferings for us, we had now also found a strong hold to have risen up again by. I showed thee what was true, and what was false, which were my properties, but I could never get thee to consider what was to be done, and what was to be left undone. If I could have delighted thee, thou wouldst have exercised thyself in me. But now I have let go my hold, and slid down into the world with thee, where giving my consent to all manner of evils, we have made our conscience our adversary, holding it down with the custom and guiltiness of offending, so that long since we have left us no possibility of amending. Had we taken heed in time, continency had so walled us in, as no enemy could have entered his batterise, neither the flesh, the world nor the devil himself, which is the chair of pestilence. Look as leprosy maketh a leper, so doth ambitious disobedience & fleshly softness, breed a devil. Thou wert of an earthly generation, nourished with milk, ordered according to man's reformation & instruction; but I was created in righteousness, disposed according to the nurture and understanding of the Almighty, who will not be pleased with the beastly manners ourselves have fashioned and made here beneath in this world. Through thee I have been hindered of the augment and increase of grace, which was promised me, yea through thee I have lost humility and continency, the guard that should have defended me. Had I overcome in this world, we had worn an immortal crown; but now thou hast prevailed, I have lost the sincerity of an angelical spirit, and am become abominable in the sight of God, before whom we shall have no kindred to speak for us nor any other that we have bound by benefits and rewards, nor yet such as will be afraid of our threats and commands But as we could have none to speak against us in this life, no not in the behalf of truth and innocency: so now we shall find none so corrupt to speak for us before him, who will suffer no bolstered causes nor depending delays to ease us one whit. But there we shall be sure to find the whole choir of heaven equivolent, to judge between good and evil, pronouncing this definitive sentence; Go ye cursed and possess utter darkness, prepared for the devil and his Angels, where it is not known nor remembered what the treasure of immortality is. Fortune's wanton, how much better for us had it been, by tribulations to have been weaned and separated from the voluptuous delights of the world, then to have enjoyed this liberty, thus to fulfil our appetites & desires without controlment? But in comparison of ourselves, we have set at nought all creatures, especially the poor, defying at the heart their necessities, whose accusations, no question, are gone up into heaven, in the bitterness of their soul, accusing us to the majesty of him before whom their prayers cannot but be heard. Thus confounded with cruel & immoderate excess, how could we propound unto ourselves long life, when we neglect the means to preserve health? Nay, what could we look for, but sudden & miserable confusion; who preferred excess before mediocrity? Thou wert in the right, she poisoned thee, thy tender and loving darling, that embraced every vain & joint of thee, holding thee so fast, that thou hadst no feeling of thyself. It was a right she's part, after she had inflamed thee within, made thee cold, bare & naked without, to leave thee also like a block, empty & hollow within, fit for nothing but worms to creep into. For all thy high climbing, she hath laid thee low enough. Farewell, the worst veslell that ever good liquor was put into. Corruption I say farewell, till we meet in hell. Whether I go upward or downward, torment is ever before me, and the sound of this trumpet; come ye that are dead in sin, to judgement. I am but a borrowed spirit, thou canst not call me back again, wherefore without hearing thy reply, farewell. Dun. Ah desperate man's death, in whom was all proneness to evil, and no disposition to do good. It should seem he was haled out of this world contrary to nature, and without the consent of sickness. Your report of these news, have put me in mind of a speech I once received from the wisest man's mouth that I think was in our age, if I may speak it, as I hope I may without offence. This worthy Gentleman, was called in other countries as I have heard, the English Solomon: the honourable dignity and place he bore here, were sufficient approvements of his wise virtues. Sir Nicholas Bacon, once a famous Lord keeper of the broad seal: whose words agree rightly to prove one part of your speech, that the woman had done the hurt, which the devil gave over and could not prevail in. His experience was on this sort. In his young days, a friend of his that was like to suffer death, for consenting to murder a child he had unlawfully begotten on a most wicked woman, sent for him to the prison where he than was: to whom this worthy Gentleman, hoping to do good, was easily entreated to come. At his first entrance into speech with him, he straightly charged him with the heinousness of the crime, saying, he thought all the devils in hell could not have enticed him to have done the like. To whom he answered, his conciept of him was good, and no other than the truth: for it was not the devil that had the upper hand of him, who received always a discouraging answer: so that showing his complaint of not prevailing to her, she gave a harder onset that would take no nay, as by the sequel appeared. To demonstrate the matter more evidently, he drew out to this honourable Gentleman, her divers charming letters, written unto him with such terms of confident boldness, as were hardly to be resisted in an affectionate body. Which when this modest Gentleman had read, so soon as conveniently he might, betook himself to humble prayers, that it might please Almighty God all the days of his life, to deliver him from the high and inightie prevailing temptations of wicked women. Hud. Surely a deed beseeming a most advised wise man, whom no doubt all his doings declared to be the best observer of godly mediocrity that I have known: a rare matter in a man of his greatness. Dunst. But I shall never forget the horrible death and end of a most unrighteous wretch. I think not myself a little beholding unto you for these good teachings, though by the example of the most absolute ill man that ever lived. Hud. To give me thanks, is but to purchase you your due from me, who have not my ceremonies in so good a readiness. I am more like to profit self by your reports, especially deriving them from so well a chosen worthy, whose approved example herein, I will bind myself to observe, taking it for a general rule, that the devil when he goeth about to beguile man, thinketh it more meet to procure women to solicit for him, then to go himself on the errand, as witnesseth also more specially the example of Eva. Dunst. Now I beseech you to your other London news. Hud. With a good will: another news is this. There was of late, an old man in the City, who decayed as it should seem in memory, mistook the season of the year, persuading himself he felt April flowers springing fresh in his withered body, thought it had been May in january. Whereupon, he ventured like a fresh gallant to marry a young damosel, to whom he might well have been grandfather. Dunst. Poor wench, she was like to have a great harvest & a little corn. But I pray you sir, did she not hood the old fool? Hud. You make such haste to your new found phrases, that they ask leisure for me to understand them Dunst. The old word is so odious, that for my part I could be content the deed and all were out of fashion: but doubtless, I can think no less, but this marriage must needs jump with my meaning, for hot and cold cannot agree together. Huddle. You mean she made him Cuckold. Dunstable. I had almost said so. Huddle. Though all likelihoods prove not true, yet perhaps this did; and now fir to the purpose. This old courser of Naples, knowing the daintiness of his chaffer, took the way he could to please her, sithence the way she would was not so ready with him. Furnishing her at the first with the plenty of all rich delights that the heart could wish, as jewels, apparel, and diet of the choicest. Notwithstanding all the heap and plenty of these gorgeous things, there was ever one thing wanting, that ran most in her mind, which all the cators she had, could not the skill to buy or procure her. Though Fortune had not yet been so friendly to afford her longing, yet nature had sufficiently furnished her with skill to dissemble her want, showing all cards made, whensoever this old younker list to rage and play with her; in short space, this lucky chance fell out, for the devil will always help his servants, look whosoever wanteth, they want not. A young reveller, fresh budded April indeed, came by the door, where this fair flower stood, in the custody and looking to of a withered impotent gardener, whose strength appeared scarce sufficient to raise the dry and light moulds that grew about this Rose, much less able to water and gage to the root it soundness. Presently upon this glance, he cast with himself how best to supply the wants he might easily discern her to be in. Not trusting too much to his own green wit, thought it good to repair to the counsel of such a one, as experience and knowledge had made wise in that faculty: not having spent all his time at cards and dice, as some unthrifts do, had upon some urgent occasions been acquainted with a cunning wizard, called mother Duck, a dame, who in her days had brooded up no small Ducklings, but such rather, as were able, without putting the bill underneath the wing, to look the Fox himself in the face; to her he hieth him, with his purse in his hand ready drawn, for losing of time, and that as Chaucer saith, tied with a Leek, that it may not be long in opening, for the hours that are spent in making many words, in such a matter, cannot be recovered back again. Now, delivering his mind in this brief manner, to one of so good understanding, the substance of the matter thus laid open before her: she hearing the place, the man's name, and his desire, casts presently all doubts behind her for Pettifoggers to take up. Being poised with that ballast, her ship fell to sail, and herself turning round like a circle, with the strong breath of this Argentum viwm, blown thither and home again, ready to break her neck over the threshold; she returns into the house to her peepling, singing, I have her, I have her: enough to have cast they youth away, enslaming so his blood with the sudden fire of unlooked for joy But this mother Quack, with conserves of Roses and Barbaries, & other gentle cooling stuff which she hath always in a readiness for such hoate liuered Gentlemen, calmed all the storm and rage, proceeding from too rank courage, even as it were at once, bringing him back again so to himself with these probatums, that at leisure and towards his going away, he inquired her good speed concerning foreign commodities. Dun. It is marvel she would trust him with these sweet probatums till she came back again, seeing him so ready to violate abroad. By my faith sir, you have so lost me in mother Ducks drugs that I cannot understand your meaning. Me thinks without making any such to do, he might better cheap perhaps have sent for her to the wine Tavern. Hud. Wine I confess will make a consenting answer that way. But is it so with you? will the appurtenances to these feverous conjunctions, so prepare your blood, that you cannot tarry the launching till you come at your Surgeon? What man, suffer your pulse to beat a little; I am almost at an end of this matter; then if you cannot stay till you come home, bestow your largesse upon some one of your women reapers that is stiffest in the back, she will perhaps stoop the better to her siccle, after you have bend her a little. Du. Surely sir, as old as we are, I fear me we shall grow wild in this wood, but I long to hear the hasty speed the old crampe-stretcher clattered so faston, at her in coming to her hive. Hu. Well sir, the matter went thus forward with them. According to her chickens direction, she found the parties sitting in the door as he had lest them. In her walk up and down before the same, she had espied one of their servants carrying in a couple of Partridges, bought for their supper, upon which to look, she laid aside the fine work she had in her hand. The master she might perceive to mislike the price: for such folk would farewell were it not for cost. Du. All this while I find not, what might make her so rejoice, in singing; she had her, she had her. Hud. With patience you shall hear; comforting herself with the knowledge that they loved to far well, finding also the old wanton was contented his young mistress should rule him, so he might carry the purse: out of such discoveries mother Truss hath bound up these conclusions, that where Bacchus' cheer was, there might also be Venus' play. Dunst. A crafty callet's construction. Hud. Then sir, she broached to her nesllecock this device, if he would be at the cost to buy some sorts of dainty fowls, she would take the pains to go to their house, and sell them at an under value: by using so to do, she was sure to prepare her way more easily for her other affairs. Dun. What another yet worse than the devil? Hud. To be short, through this practice she became a guest, and a much made on woman by them both: where she still waited her opportunity, to whisper certain lectures or points of her dangerous doctrine, in the ear of this fair flower, whom she saw thus prime fed at the board, and as she thought, forepined with bed reversions, and short benevolences, warily prying continually to discover what troubled thoughts she might perceive her to smother up and keep secret to herself, through the fear of his frantic ieaiealousie, and her own ignorance in remedies. Had not indeed this old leech been at hand (as the case required) this flower had seeded away untimely, oppressed with too much heat by day, and the want of nightly moisture. Dunst. Before God, I begin to pity the poor wench. Hud. What do you man, pity her, and know her not? it is like if you had seen her as the other did, you would have made mother Duck gone double ringed thither. In faith, I am persuaded your tale might have been heard, but hardly credited at these years. Yet you could not have blamed your messenger, who would have done her true intent, as well for you as for him, so you had weighed asheavy in her scales, which I know you are able to do. Dunstable. I think if I should meet with your Mastership in London, I should go near to put you in mind of this merriment, so the Gentlewoman your wife were not by. Hud. You have made your ●…lfe merry belike in conceit, so that your wishes being set out already, it is thereby like that you mean to be there before me: and if ye be, the least boy in the street can direct you to mother Duck, with whom you may lovingly confer about the truth of this matter, or the like concernings if you find yourself so troubled. Dun. I always hinder the matter, and endanger your displeasure with my troublesome speeches. Hud. Nay verily, if your meaning be no worse than your words, there is neither danger nor displeasure towards you from me. Dun. I thank you sir, now I pray you begin again where you left, at the young bride her distress. Hud. Well, if I left there, there also shall begin the words of mother Be her commission, who put the young wench in mind of her husband his age, which had been a pleasure to her to have forgotten. Dunst. Nay I beseech you sir, hide not from me mother Ducks night spells, which I know are wholesome charms, especially herself being favoured by the aid & conduct of that happy and successful star, called by the Poets Dione the mother of Venus. Hud. You shall pardon me by your leave, especially the matter being such, wherein I desire to have no skill. To this demand of yours, I will answer with the Dutch man, Ick kan die wijes well kunde icke die woorden, which is in English; I know her meaning, could I her phrases. Wherefore in a mind so well prepared in the one, and so great skill to solicit in the other, you and I at these years will not doubt, but conditions were agreed of, in manner and form, which were these. That the young lover for whom she was agent, should come in apparel clad like a Poulter, keeping such times of bringing ware, and such proportionate sorts of fowl, as she was wont. Adding beside, this caveat; that if she were not ready in the way, he should hold his birds dearly prized to the servants, to the intent he might be brought to her presence, if occasions might so suffer. Besides, it was agreed between them, that she should keep her chamber, and feign herself sick those days appointed for his coming, giving charge to her people, that if the Fowler came, himself with his ware to be brought up to their Master and her. Now if master Oswould were out of the way, all the better market, if not, they to take the chance that should happen. To colour the matter the better withal, this mother Duck sued to her master to be privileged for her age, no more to come on these services, saying, she would appoint the Mallard her son, at such times as he came to town, in her steed to brin, his best and choicest fowls thither, in sort as she was wont. Her master, to save three pence or a groat he was wont to give her for her pains, thought it as convenient or rather better for one to come and go, on whom there should be no cost dispended, and so readily dispensed with mother Duck. These matters thus far in parlance, were according to agreements performed and acted by this taker or country Powlter, holding traffic inviolable on both sides, to the full accomplishment of both their desires; till break-neck fortune, which suffereth nothing to be well done always, threw in a slender chance to lose all at a cast, which was won by hazard, and kept by great adventure. Her husband having lost the money in his purse abroad, at a neighbour's house, where he was wont to play at tables, came home to fetch more money, with haste to return and recover his losses: where he found his wife merchandizing with the Fowler, hucking and half penying to save a penny in a bird, which pleased her husband well. He to agree and take up this green quarrel between them which were but new fallen out, as he came up the stairs, casting his eye from one to another, as they gave him cause in their plead, found a fault in the casement of the Mallard his hose, which for hast he could not alas up so close, but that a false piece of a wrought waistcoat was discerned to hang out. Which when the husband strived better to discover, the other broke violently from him leaving foul and fair and all behind him, through his good fortune of the gates being thus left open, he escaped their hands. Dun. It many times cometh so to pass, that those things which should commend men to their loves, are less safeties than mean and neglected things: but doubtless it was a great chance to them both, he should come in, while they were thus comparing their things together. Hud. What man how is it with you? me thinketh your looks plead the young wench's case: say truly, is she guilty or not guilty? and if you were her husband, what would you do in this case? Dunst. Surely sir, where nothing can be proved, suspicion should not part a man and his wife, might I have persuaded the matter. Hud. Had you been there, you might have done more than indifferent service to have taken up the matter, which would have deserved such a further faucur, as women leave not commonly unrequited. I am partly of your mind, he came somewhat short of his proofs, yet sooner up the stairs than he was looked for of them, who would not have sent for him, had he tarried until this time: nay perhaps she had rather her husband had run out, and the other to have tarried. Dunst. Had it been my case, for all my saying, I would have made master di dapper have fline out at the roof tiles, sor presuming to kanke upon my nest, unless my wife could have persuaded me he had been an Funuke, and could do nothing but kiss her hand, or carry her Fan, and then surely I might safely have committed her to his keeping to have looked that none should come up unto her but his self. Hud. It is not to be doubted, but they were both too wise to make him privy to their bargain, as appeared by the one, which was not the man he dissembled himself to be. Dun. I am of this mind further, that this elegant beholder of beauties, that could be moved to love at the first sight, could also be put in mind to follow his occasions busily, according to the shortness of the time he had with his mistress in the chamber. But every man that breaketh his neighbours fence, trespasseth not against his enclosures. I think well, while they were bargaining, there might some beck or twinkling regard pass between them, but as for further harm, notwithstanding the other his jealousy, I think there was none. What imagine you sir, would you credit false suspicion, which hath too busy an eye in every corner? Hu. Herein let your conceit help you, especially in a matter that declareth itself. Du. Then I pray you sir how ended the matter? Hu. Surely the young woman made her husband a piece of amends, in wishing him so young a man as the mallard was. For the rest that remaineth, he must have patience with her, till time and place may afford her the like means to make him a further amends. Dunst. What became of the Mallard, went he home to his mother? Hu. He was pursued thither but not found there. You may imagine by his haste, he had a further flight to make: yet in her howl were found by the old senior, seathers of another colour than he was wont to wear when he came abroad to sell his foul. Now he comparing the similitude of the man, and the ritchnesse of the attire together, it seemed better unto him to let fall his revenge, and to whist the matter, then to let the world make a tale of this transmutation. Dunst. How then I beseech you came you to hear of this business? Hud. By the common post that keepeth no man's counsel Dunst. Belike he is some monster, you name him not. Hud. If you have a desire to know him, it is long winged fame, who sitteth on every man his house top, bringing with him news of all sorts. Dun. Now I pray you sir, show the Gentleman his name that was thus likely to be wronged. Huddle. I have not heard his name, but they say he hath masked open faced with her since. Dun. It was after the banquet then, else had it not been Italiano More. But I wonder how the matter should be given out, and not the parties names with it. Hud. There are many dainty things in the world, and those wholesome to, which have no names, neither are to be found in my Lexicon. Dunst. If they be not already in your Lexicon they will never come into my Dixionarie. Hud. I am sure I have not lied unto you, in saying there was such a matter even since the conquest also, yet I must confess a long while ago, and still news to you, because you have not heard them before. Dunst. I beseech you sir have you not taken this report out of Chaucer his januarie and his May. Hud. Indeed yes, though not in every half agreeing with the same, the rather, because I knew nothing but marvels would delight you. Dunst. I pray you then sir, what became of mother Duck, had she not a husband to help her now in her extremity? Hud. Like enough she had a Nicolaitane, who in his days had slept many an acceptable sleep to others, and profitable ones to himself Such mechanical lewdsbies, are said to get more sleeping, than others can do waking. Dunst. Had she no punishment for these her foul solicitations? Hud. Perhaps ere this time she is both catched and skinned also, but for aught that I can hear, her constancy is such, that neither for whip nor chord, she will confess, who the Mallard her son was. justifying herself besides, that she hath done nothing contrary to her profession, saying; every one in their trade, may exercise the vocation they were bred & brought up in, without offence to law. Dunst. But by your favour sir, such foul cancellers & breakers of the seals and obligations of marriage, cannot be too sevearly punished. I perceive they that make their recourse to such folks, must not have their benignities shut up in their coffers at home. Hud. No doubtless, with such, so soon as the door is once shut, and yourself gone out, you are forgotten for the gift-already bestowed. Dunst. Me thinks they should be afeard to make any their enemies, who have in that sort commanded them, doubting least in their anger they should confer their benefit some other where. Hud. Nay, such is their sincerity, that they dare give venture to endure all hazards. Dunst. I pray ye sir satisfy me in this one thing more: what do you take to be the cause, why some that use this vaulting exercise grow lean, and other some fat? Hud. I think you know, or else can imagine the cause, without my telling you. Dunst. No verily. Hud. Then I will not be dainty with you in my reason. They that grow fat put their whole felicity in it, and so battle themselves withal. Others, that go not so heartily to it, pine themselves away, because their bodies are in one place, and their minds in another. Dunst. I never had thought, that in those conjunctions, it had been necessary to have had two souls in one body. Hud. Look ever what the lover looseth, is to be found in his beloved. Dunst. Now your other news I beseech you sir. Hud. There is also a pleasant report made of another Gentleman, who had an elder brother his part, of such vices as were noted unto you in the Gentleman deceased, who is like enough to fit your desire, in making away his living which the other kept. Besides other his faults, he was noted with these two especial ones, both enemies unto grace, viz. Pride and Ingratitude. Of such notable pride he was, that the day he had not been noted and observed with caps and knees as he had gone in the streets, that day he would return back again to his chamber, taking it for ominous to have been so despised and neglected of the base and ignoble world, falling at defiance with his wholesute of apparel, the workman, and the obscure and unworthy people, that through through slenderness of their judgements, could not value his excellency, at whose begetting for aught he could conjecture, without doing himself wrong, there could not be any of the gods less than jupiter himself. Working out the day upon this conceit, strived with his little wit how to amend this fault, which he knew was not in the boys of the street, whom often before he had seen to point at his proper person. Neither in himself, for he rather mended his conceit, thinking every day better than other of himself, till in the end he concluded, it must needs rest in the workman and in his attire. Whereupon his every days exercise, was to cast and devise strange inventions, how to double and treble cost upon all manner of apparel, till it came to such expense and height, that himself with his lewd devisors, could bring it to no greater: towards the furnishing and maintenance of which disguised outrages, great sums of money were wasted, to the hazard and overthrow of his whole estate of livelihood. The good Gentlewoman his mother, hearing tell of the lewd waste her son made of his lands in this prodigal and unworthy sort, came home to his lodging, hoping through the interest she had in him, together with the counsel & experience, which by report of the world she might allow to be in herself, and afterwards fell out to be foond in her, she might be bold to persuade him, that those were not the ornaments that best beautified a Gentleman, neither that his father and ancientors won their credit and advancement by such degrees of fantastical and slothful slightnesses, but rather by valiant and adventurous deeds, acceptable and pleasing to kings and Princes their masters, whom they served. Which words he seemed not to hear, on purpose, to show his mother in the most despitefullest sot he could, her unworthiness to speak to him, who was neither at so much leisure, nor so base minded to lose any time in answering her. Which she noting, and the easilier by his knitting and frouncing his pair of lordly brows at her, this tender Gentlewoman, finding herself thus over awed by the weed her son, fell into a great grief, or fresh lamenting the loss of the worthy Gentleman her husband, this bastard God his father, from whom in the many years of their living together, she had received no such discomfiture. Withal, breaking into these words, uttered (it should seem) with much grief; Shall I die, ere I see the hope of one of thy father his virtues come from thee? Had not thy birth made thee a Gentleman, this painted apparel with thy dark conditions, would prove thee but a mock Gentleman. They that borrow gestures and apparel, to put on the out sides of Gentlemen for an hour, could they become the persons of them they strive thus to counterfeit, no better than thou imitatest thy father's inward virtues, notwithstanding their apparel and likeness of them they would present, they should be thrust headlong from the stage. Wretch that thou art, to have one finger of thy glove, the worst and meanest thing about thee, better, and of more worth, than all thy conditions. His remembrance being thus rubbed, he gave his mother this reply; You tell me that which I make lessereckening of, than the lace that toeth my . Care I for my father or your breeding me a Gentleman? or should I be so foolish to think, the world esteemeth or careth the more for me, in that he hath left me gentility, which neither he, nor you, could take from me, I having that you see lying before you, to whom I am more beholding, then to heaven or earth? Had my father left me enough of that, than perhaps his virtues you speak of, might have had my good word now he is gone. I confess I have heard my father, when he was disposed to please himself, to remember the services he did his Sovereigns, at Bullen, New Haven, Saint Quintin's, and I wots not where else beside. Put case he did in these places, thanks worthy offices, beseeming a forward and a valiant Gentleman, what is that to me? Had I no money in my purse now to pay for my supper to night: think you the reciting or remembrance of my father's Acts, would pay for my ordinary? Perhaps it would, where nothing is to be had, so nothing and nothing, may have a merry meeting, but something and something, shall have the better greeting. His pensive mother, too much discontented and discomforted with this careless and irreligious answer, fell into a further perturbation, or rather grievous passion of mind, out of which these words were occasioned; Alas the while, that I should live to hear a counterfeit wretch, contrarious to nature, and borne of my body, to reckon his father's living too little for him, and his virtues too great. Are we come to that pass now, not to care how we be bred, nor on whom, so that lands and goods be one, let the devil or the dunghill be the other, it mattereth not? Had thy father carried that mind, or rightly discerned thy disposition, he would have left thee that which should better have fitted thy conditions, and have bestowed a gentle gift upon a Gentleman. Is there a diligent choice made, and a principal labour taken, to make horses fit for a Prince his stable, & shall we not admit or bestow the like care to breed and fashion men, beseeming a worthy Prince and nation in their better places and services? If a horse that is not rightly bred, prove better than the generation from whence he cometh, because of the ill likelihood, it is more than was looked for. On the contrary part, if a horse that was duly bred, miscarry & come short of the likely or rather certain grounds of well doing, it cannot be without faults in themselves, who wanted not good breeding. Thou canst look for no less than a heavy judgement from God, for thus pulling down with thy vices whom he had exalted for virtues. There I see money lying before thee for land I am sure is already sold, & I fear the rest standeth but upon assurance. Lock it up, and keep it safe, since thy lands thou couldst not keep. As for thy conditions, trust them abroad lose I warrant thee, neither Gentleman nor honestman will rob thee of them. Dunst Surely sir, it is a dangerous wit, which maketh a man forget nature. Had it not been for the ordinance of nature, this Gentleman's father might have had perhaps, more likely reasons and better hopes to have bestowed his living upon some other of his children or kindred. May this gear go on this sort, we shall have an untoward race of children, if they be no better taught then thus, to care for none, nor to show duty longer, nor further, than they receive benefits. To say truly: they that care not what parents they come off, I little think they can sufficiently regard themselves, or love their children. Hud. You did well to put me in mind of my own forgetfulness of the time of the day, which already beginneth to bid us good night. Dunst. I wonder how a man thus puffed up with the whirlwind of vanity, could keep his bones from breaking under his flesh. My Lord is not yet returned from hunting, so that if I have not wearied you too much already, I may hope to enjoy you yet another while, till this discourse at the least be at an end. Hud. My business being altogether with my Lord, no excuse nor borrowed occasion, shall carry me from you, till by the last season of the evening we be constrained to part. Du. Then I beseech you sir, to finish these news, and show me what became of this Gentleman. Hud. After all was sold and spent, there fell out this merry jest. All his men saving one, were gone to set up their bills in Paul's, to catch another young master, better feathered then the other, whose plumes they had pulled within the down. He finding himself thus forsaken, in a lunatic sort, bad his man (thus post alone left with him) make ready his horses, for he would ride home and live sparingly, using abstinence after a surfeit, till his half years rend should be due. To which his man made answer; why sir, whither will you go? Marry knave (quoth he) home, & named the place. To which he smilingly replied; You know sir, you took money for that long ago. Why villain, quoth the Master, where is the money then? I think Sir, spent, saith his man. The money spent (saith the Master) my land sold, and I never knew of it till now! In that rage, he falleth upon his man, whom he would have slain outright, had he not been rescued from him by some other company within the house. Dunst. If he could have conjured his land out of his man again, it had been a cudgeling well bestowed: but I fear me there would come no such dust out of his coat. It is a pleasant thing for a man that hath sold his land, and spent the money, to dream he hath it still, till he waketh, and findeth indeed nothing left, but his bare desire to have it so. Yet you have not declared, what became of the Gentleman in the end. Hud. Surely it was his good hap, by lighting upon a good marriage, with his after wit, to recompense much of his follies, purchasing again in the end, as much land as was left him at the first. Dun. Great fortune to be twice a man, withal met he with any better conditions then at the beginning? Hud Would you desire better conditions then to purchase land? or would you wish him to do any thing else, if he were your son? Dunst. He recompensed his man's beating I doubt me not. Huddle. Perhaps nay, as the course of the world goeth now amongst spoilers, the master his good day, proveth the man his ill day, and the masters marring, becometh the man his making. Perhaps, when he sold land, the other might take out of the bags that were too heavy many times with money, to make them lighter for carriage. But now the world being changed, his master finding no bags to hold enough, nor sumpter horse that will carry enough, Tottenham thus become French, you may easily imagine the date of such wasters were out, as would send it faster packing, than the master could get it coming. Dunst. You have rightly described the condition of a secret knave, that were like enough indeed, besides his privy pilferies, to rob his master of his wits also, as in this Gentleman it appeared. Hud. If your son would entertain such a one, it would be a good ease for you, which are feign to carry his cloak-bag, and walk his horse, for want of such a one. I know many sons that would afford their father's better offices: but he maketh you an amends I know, that will content any reasonable father; for while you hold jack nag in your hand without, he goeth in and taketh up money after ten in the hundred, which gaineth you forty. So I trust you cannot say, but you are well paid, for bearing the budget, and walking the Palfrey. Dunst. I confess I cannot repent me in overdooing for my towardly child, who will from time to time, and I hope at all times, deserve it: or at the least, keep things in the same stay and order I shall be able to leave him them. I like not to play the tyrant with my child, as some fathers do, who unnaturally suck up the bowels, & devour the blood of their children: who after they have spoiled the fame and renowine of their ancestors, leave also behind them innocent children, on purpose to have them bear the burden of their own outrageous follies. Where the heir is thus punished for the injust offences of their parents, there cometh in God's wrath, to the third and fourth generation, by the unjust impositions of their accursed fathers. This is called the child's performing his father's vows, which he undertook and fulfilled not according to the charge of his first promise made unto Almighty God. What more godless part in a manner can there be, then for wicked parents to make illegitimate their immediate and lawful children, by prodigal disheritings? Such injurious parents, by law should be forbidden to get children, who thus selling their livings, leave behind them a perpetual memorial of their faults, by the testimony of their own apparent wickednesses. What infinite evils are they subject unto, which beyond the condition of savage beasts, take from their children all power and means, which should defend and keep them safe from the violence of the oppressor? Who after they have delivered over the honour of their ancestors into other men's hands, leave their own creatures upon a bare flint stone, or succourless in the dust, which no savage beast at no time hath voluntarily done, by her like dear and tender ones. Till such destroying father's usurped upon the right, whereunto they were appointed but Bailiffs of the husbandry upon an account, these heritage's being the gift of God, remained in one stock and line, from generation to generation, according to the first virtuous blessing, as yourself yesterday graciously remembered. Call we this bestowing of children in our own places, to make them heirs of nothing? They that thus unkindly neglect and set at nought their second self, what delight may any other hope to find in them? Dunst. Me thinketh the equity of the law, should as well provide for keeping the heritage, as to appoint the heir. Hud. I think the law makers in time past, thought there could be found none so unnatural, as to wrong their own children, in sort, as they supposed none so hard hearted, as to murder their fathers, against whom also, for the said respect there was no law thought upon to be made. Dun. Happy were the children of such fathers, if they might be borne again, or their father's new christened. For they must needs be accursed in their cradles, or begotten against their parents wills and consents, who first of all, pull down the seat of their ancestors, than next root out the foundation of their children; after that cause brotherhood utterly to perish and decay: and so by consequence in the end, become a perpetual impediment to the well doing of all their friends, especially to tread utterly down, all such that are in degree of proximity in blood with them. Hud. It should seem to me, that the dishonouring of parents, is the principal cause to pull down Gods heavy hand upon them, which you have marked and set out in this accursed sort. Du. Yea surely sir, the defying of parents, argueth a wasting of God's grace, and all manner his blessings. There is nothing could trouble me more, then to be wronged by a man of my own nature, and to have him made my familiar enemy. The man of peace whom I have trusted and set out in a readiness, to take the first fruits of my labours, to be supplanted by him, and to see him gnash his teeth at me like a persecuter, o that would bury me quick! Is there a spite beyond that displeasure, to have a man's head broken with his own footstool? I must needs call for my grave to defend me, when my nearest and dearest neighbour shall approach me with violence, and stand up stiffly against me. When I shall find that I took for suppled honey, to become stiff darts, what shall I then do? Are they not words softer than honey, for the child to crave the father his blessing upon his knees? And are they not darts infected with deadly poison, for the Son out of the same mouth to say, I rejoice in this day, wherein I have prevailed against my father? Nay, are not these the words of a mere Sathanist, out of his heart to say; Death take my father, hold him fast, I have delivered him fettered and bound into thy hands, thou shalt murder him with little striving, for I have taken resistance away from him? How like you sir of these dutiful recompenses, to reward a tender father withal? could you not be contented to see such an heir fair hanged, and that in time too, ere he had diminished that whereto he had no right, to make room for a more worthy to come into his place? Hud. Is this that you would have your son to stay himself upon in such order and sort, you shall be able to leave him in. Are you from a kind father, become the tragical tyrant you spoke of even now? or have you made a trial of yourself, against the time may come to play that part in earnest, you have hither to dallied withal? Thanks be to God, your case hath been such, to find always a leisure, to look upon lamentable spectacles in others a far off, & have at no time been constrained to come upon the stage, to play a part yourself. Dunst. Can I play any part to do you service, according to the intendment of my heart, I would willingly without constraint, perform my service, in what soever sort it may please you to command my poor ability. Would God your worship had removed displeasures, and taken up strifes, while they were new begun, before they had altered to that vehement sharpness, and been aggravated to that greatness, which since hath brought a tedious adversity and vexation upon you, the rigour whereof hath constrained you to endure such unkindnesses, as the world in the like cases affordeth. Hud. I stand in very little need I thank you, to have these unpleasantnesses renewed or made lasting unto me; but rather am compelled, by the cruelty of a disease worse than a Dysenteria, to use the remedy of a medicine against the devil his biting called patience. Dun. To be plain with you sir; If you sell the Lordship of the town wherein I dwell; forsaking all other parts, I will play the Caonian Dove, and be gone ere the Hawk come. Hud. Your are a shrewd Pigeon to pull, come it once to billing, it had need be a hardy hawk that should bring you under her beak. If you scape the sowfe you will it, and leg it, too too swift for a short winged Hawk one the plains, and too strongly for a long winged Hawk in the covertures, or bushy coppises. I have taken more harm by three kinds of base birds, that have their bloods bruised within them, which I will be content to name unto you then by all the Hawks you can reckon that have any spark of natural goodness in them. The birds names be these Rooks, Stock-doves, and Starelings. But of the three, the least harm I have received from the Starelings, and the rather because my own commiseration hath caused me to bear with them The other two, for these noisome properties especially, I am troubled with. The one is, they are full of hurt, the other that they are profitable to none. The Rooks, look whom they take an unkindness against, as it is their beastly natures and properties indeed, to be noisome & troublesome to all sorts of birds, look I say what they cannot master single and of an even hand, they bring in a rage and tribe of helpers, to the downfalling of them they have conceived shrewdness against. The Stockdove in like sort, when he hath laid an offence in your way, for which he looketh for your indignation and displeasure, if you but stalk at him as they say, without fire in the cock, strait his tail goeth higher than his head, giving you a proud obeisance or malapert courtesy, which you must take for a full recompense of all your harms. I saw this other day in a wood of my own, one of these rank blooded Stockdoves, breast a pheasant from his perch, as disdainfully as if himself had been Lord of the wood alone. The Pheasant you know how harmless and generous a bird he is, hurting none, neither striving at all, but when he is compelled to resist. Dun. I marvel surely how the Dove could mislike that beautiful and lovely bird. Hud I can easily take away your wonder; because the Pheasant had better blood in his body, than the other lowering and wry looking wretch. Dunst. To continue my speeches to you, to whom I mean as to myself, I wish you to hold fast, and make much of somewhat while you have it, lest hereafter you seek that you had, and could not keep where it will not be found. I am but a poor thin Kettle, and therefore would be loath to be knocked against a thick brass pot, whose smiting would surely prove my breaking. I love not to take wrong and to be threatened also. I had rather be packing while my bones be whole, then to be promised golden splints when they are broken. I like not those privy mocks, to be made bare of my goods, and then to be pitied: the shame that is so put upon me in my extremity, is far worse than indurate necessity itself. It is a wayfairing man's property to make much of the pot, and never to let it go out of his hand when he is dry, till he have supped it of clean: then when he hath left it licquorlesse in a rage, to cast it against the ground. I like not while I have aught, to be stroked and scorned together with these fair words, what wants thou, let me know and I will help thee. They that be brought down through such simple confidence shall be raised again at leisure, committing all to fortune, like as when a man hath foolishly overseen his foregame which was furthered by good casting, thinking to recover the same with the muse of his wit, playing an after game at Irish. God bless me from such merciless minded men, as can so lead a man into a fool his paradise, and there leave him succourless. When I am tempted by any such ones busy questions or dangerous communication, it is my best and safest way, to be always found in a dream. Were I a rich man, I might speak proud words, and have them justified at the full, but since I am but poor, I will speak such words as without offence may take place. Hud. Since the black mantle of the night, hath folded up within her darkness this days light, I am also contented to let the fiery light of this exercise die in my hand, bearing patiently the burden of the heavy saddle you have fastened upon my silly Asselike back. Dunst. Nay rather I beseech you I being Gods silly creature, commonly called a packhorse, suffer me to carry the last sack to the mill. Since the multiplying of speeches to this large proceeding, have grown out of my desire, to have fashions and patterns restored to their wont guise which you have maintained and upheld, to stand already in a better frame: wherefore now, show I beseech you, the right abuse yourself have observed in matters worthy reproof and amendment. Hud. If it be my rule, you desire to have things squared by, I had rather keep a Feruler to admonish them which corrupt the language and capacity they have freely given them to exercise, then at all to find fault with such, who show to have more wit in their hands, than the other have in their heads. It is the new fashion speech that troubleth me. Dunst. I beseech you sir, show the abuse thereof, for I am persuaded the singularity or marvelous fineness therein troubleth the whole world. Hud. I am contented to show you their criplednesse that I have observed to halt in that kind. Some speak, as if they had a mint going in their mouths, & lack a stamp to figure their words. Others speak as though they were matching their words, as Fletcher's do Arrow heads to their shafts Others speak, as though their words were hidebound in their mouths, and lack a mash of liquorice and Reasons of the Sun, to lose their tongues. Others keep their mouths shut up a long while, to make their words strong and forcible, on purpose to shoot birdboults. Others have such a sharp lose, in letting go of their words that they are able to make you an answer, before they know your demand. Others speak so scornfully, as though they bought their words by wholesale, and were too good to retail them again. Other some speak their words so thick, that you must tarry the chewing them, ere you can conceive what they say. Others speak with such a grace of moral sentences and phrases that you would think that they eat no other meat but Apothegs and Dixionaries. Others keep a school of manners in their mouth, every word giving back, to have the other go before. Others are as dainty of their words, as if they bought them by Haberdepois, and would keep them till a dear year, that they might utter them by Troy or grand weight. Others speak such brackish and pickled words, that they are feign to lay them a watering in the foam of their mouths, ere they can utter them. Others speak such high and lofty words, that they are feign to set open the broad gates of their mouths, for the wicket is too little for their larded words to come out at. Others speak, as if there were more vowels than consonants. Others speak so short, as if their words were made of the medicine that cureth the toothache. Others speak, as if their words were made all of one livery, & were afeard of the state of retainers, such men have likely the jaundice, or ill affected livers, as may appear by the dusky colour in their faces. Others speak as though they were sacrificing their words, and quartered them with their teeth, as they come out of their mouths: those be such, as their words be ever better than their deeds. Others speak their words so grave and so sad, that you can discern nothing by them but their colour, which is for the most part Lion tawny, into such you must dig deep to know their meaning. Others have such bouncing words, sent so strongly from their lungs, that they that are subject to the falling sickness, had not need to stand in their way. Others speak so holily, as though their words were made of S. Helen's beads: such tell their words as they utter them: you must take heed of those, for they are ever bored through the midst with hypocrisy. Others speak, as if they had eaten all their meat at the mill door, and had scraped their words out of Malt dust: such when they should speak, fall a cackling. Other some speak forked words, as if they shot them out of a Crossbow: it is dangerous for a tame beast to meet with such. Some speak as leisurely, as if they tarried for a wind, to bring their words from Frankford mart, where if the exchange prove good, you shall be sure of a banquet of conceited words. Other some speak as if their words were made of wild Hops: such men's tongues run always posting before, and their wits come halting after; such a wit had William summers. Others speak such spangled words, that you would think they had them all at the Imbrotherers: such commonly never spare for any cost. Others speak such odoriferous provocative words, that you would imagine them to be made of Amber grief: when such open their mouths, all the coast is perfumed, as it was when Cleopatra breathed upon wanton Anthony. Others tell a tale, as if they were making a Bridge of words between Lambeth marsh and Greenwich park. Others speak as blasphemously and Giantlike, as they did at the confusion of tongues in Babylon, who had been better the doors of their mouths had been dammed and shut up, then to have profaned the deity with such ideot-like words, as were neither conceived with meditation, framed with counsel, nor directed so much as with a heathen judgement. Dunst. Had I not crossed myself, and removed out of your circle, I had been a dead man ere this. Huddle. Why man, show me the bug, that we may run away both together. Dunstable. Your word odoriferous, hath made every joint of me to tremble and shake, and my hair to stare and stand upright on my head as you see. Hud. How may a man keep off a ghastly spirit, with crossing himself, or otherwise profit himself, by that ceremony of crossing, show me that skill for a parting blow. Dunst. The virtue thereof I know not, but my own custom that I can teach you. When I meet with a strange or contrarious thing unto me, the like whereof I have neither seen nor heard off before. I strait take it for ominous, and to prognosticate ill luck unto me, which to prevent, that it creep not upon me, I stand upright, making the sign of the cross on my sore-head, to stand me in stead of a Target to cover and defend my whole body.   
FINIS   

The Argument of this book, according to the Author's meaning.  
THough I promised in my epistle to the Readers, to put no interdations or distributions of my own ignorances, between the author's words and meanings, whereby to enlarge or diminish their speeches, yet because there are no partition walls set up and laid, between one speech and another, through out their whole discourse, I have thought good, hoping it may be done without offence, with groundsels of mine own rough hewing, to divide the floors of the rooms within this work, for the further benefit, if it might be, of the well disposed readers. If I come short or mistake any thing herein, for lack of knowledge, being not made privy to the devisers conceits, I desire as at the beginning, it may be pardoned of the wise and indifferent reader, the rather, because I have not taken upon me to ride aloft between the author's meanings, but altogether go about, humbly to resound unto the world, the echo which was beaten back upon me from out the wood or Park wherein these matters were talked of. Again, though thorough the whole book there are few words that go for nought, yet dare I not venture to expound them accordingly, as I might barely imagine them to be spoken, lest I should make myself thereby a coactor or gatherer up of other men's meanings, as if I were able to beat out the brains of their sufficiences, whose experience and knowledge, I must of necessity give place unto. That which I am able to perform, I offer myself willingly unto, which is, to lay open such doubts as may arise to such as are not readily disposed of themselves, to labour or regard the true intent and meaning of the dialogers; who in my conceit, were altogether desirous to benefit if they could, such Gentlemen as daily seek to murder themselves by all manner degrees of violent follies. Unless in time they better respect themselves, neither this supplying plaster, nor Master Kellie his great Elixir will be able to restore or recover them from out their dangerous consumptions, who by disorderly government, make this incurable disease also hereditable to their children, so that the sovereign medicine itself can give the no remedy, unless in time they sly the privy snares, which all sorts of enemies both sleeping and waking intent against them. As the spider with poisoned twist unseen, beguileth the silly flies, so with the deadly sting of these venomous deceivers, thorough too much outrageous folly, do Gentlemen suffer their blood, and their children's blood, to be sucked up. The first speaker within this dialogue, is called an ancient retired Gentleman, because of his lowly and mild kind of living, not at all disposed to strive with the world, in a proud busy restless sort: the other is termed a middling or franckling. The world acknowledgeth no such degree, as they of that sort desire to be holden in, which is to be accounted more than a yeoman, and less than a Gentleman: such once are said to harrow hell, to make their sons Gentlemen. Whereupon cometh this byword, Master how call you him, the son of goodman what shall I call him. These kind of men are instant wonderers at lewdriches, which when the cankered and malicious minded wretches enjoy in any plenty, then strait they think, the troth and grace of all things, consists in themselves, presuming that their children and themselves put on new natures, by attiring them beyond their birth and degree. This sort of men Palingenius took great displeasure at, saying; If riches and worldly dross should make Gentlemen, than the Butcher, the franckling, the Barber, the Fishmonger, the Shepherd, the Tanner, the Bawd, the thief, the Usurer, and all of every filthy sort, whom the unequal hand of Fortune hath exalted, might clout out their gentility. But God and nature forbids such as proceed from those base conditions, addicting their minds wholly unto that which can deserve no worthy laud nor praise, to attain the gift and force divine of gentility, which is only achieved through virtuousness. Good enterprises and virtuous deeds, commend unto this degree, and not the body set out with gorgeous shows: so that the mind alone procureth gentility, which is an ornament to none, but to him that doth appropriate himself to virtue. Many of mean degree have bodies and outward shapes bred in them through the force of nature, which for all that, still retain in mind a base conceit of virtues. Neither God nor nature gives this value unto all; but deals only bountiful herein with such, as respectively incline themselves to better their conditions. If gentility consisted in triumphing names and brags of riches, what lack might not be then a Gentleman? To she stouthfulnesse, to haunt righteousness, to relieve the distressed, to provide for the weak, to defend the injured, by these means was gentility at the first attained. All men lived in equality, till virtue made the difference. Then were not men admitted to principal and greatest offices, that could gain or oppress most. Then was not authority fenced in with wickedness. It must needs be a miserable commonwealth, where the best officer shall become the worst author and maintainer of naughtiness. It is a woeful authority that defendeth wickedness. Offices were not ordained for such as could most politicly enrich themselves, but rather for those which were likeliest to perform unto their Prince and commonwealth best services. If nothing should be law, but the decree and pleasure of them that sit in the commanding place, what hope should any have long to enjoy it, in that certainty and orderly frame, that gracious and wise Princes have commanded them? Prince's laws therefore, are not to be executed according to the pleasure and commandment of their officers, but rather according to the office and duty, in conscience and honesty from their prince they are charged by. Gracious Princes think it not sufficient for themselves, to be conversant and exercised in virtues, unless also they hold their principal offices in the strict observation of their just and expedient laws. If it be fit for the Prince himself to be decked with judicial effects, outward pomp and ostentatious shows will not alone suffice to discharge inferiors duties in their offices. Such as from an high place offend in their office, no account or correction can be so straightly taken, as the quality of their offence meriteth, faulting against the task imposed upon them by their Prince, for the whole commonwealths good. Such in this discourse, were by their principal leader or chief worthy, clearly disfranchised from the society or conversation of men. The strict exercises of justice in the magistracy, caused the Roman Empire so long, and so not ably to flourish. But when they fell at their own lust, to dispense with laws, shaking off moderation and abstinence, than ceased their happiness, and after them followed a more unthrifty seed, which made an viter end of all prosperous years, bidding virtue in the end utterly adieu, making the noble birth of their ancestors, through the stain of their villainies, a reproach unto them, shaming them also to whom they should have passed their blood by testament of virtues. As the body engendereth a body where nature is complete, so doth the mind beget a perfect mind, according to such perfections of virtues, as were entire in the state of virtues in the antecedent & noble worthy. By ignorant times in this place, is meant the sort & state men lived in, ere they were taken with the desire of knowledge, before there was any search made into natural causes, and the general use of creatures. Because there should no contention arise who that principal worthy was, that mended thus the condition of men, he nameth him not. At no hand he will allow him, that hath an eye to himself, without respecting the good of others, how rich or great so ever he be in the world, to be a constant man, firm in virtues, but only a proud puffin of the world, or a Pippin of S. joanes wood. By hypocrites, in this place are meant, such as humble themselves beyond cause towards some, on purpose to lift themselves up beyond reason, against other some. Such are said to imitate the outward habit and shape of virtues, but never to put on the inward ability of well doing. Such hypocrites, in their flattering promises resemble the devil who offered our saviour Christ all the kingdoms of the world, to the intent to take from him (if he would have been tempted by him) the incomparable riches he was already possessed of. The seditious jesuits, are here called poisoned Serpents, and hooded Friars, because they have put on the hoods of Rome and Spain, which are murder and rebellion, sent hither by the Pope and the King of Spain, who are called greater Serperts than themselves. Friars have always been carriers and recariers of the trash of Rome, so as these lesuits are now. By calling his dames house a chapel of ease, is meant, his sextrie or vestry, wherein he was wont to bestow his holy relics, called by the frankling the Friars demisaries and by the Apothecaries Testiculum canis. By fortunes wanton, is meant such a one, whose lust goeth over all things without being satisfied: such a one as is ever sick of the surfeit of plenty. Fortitude is called a valiant virtue, because the courageous heart thrusteth out the blood from the shroud of the fearful breast, to secure and strengthen the veins and outward parts of the body, which are in a more readiness to execute valorous things. By the hockie dame, is meant Vacana, the goddess of harvest, to whom husbandmen give thanks, & pray for rest and quietness after their great and sore labours. Digestion, is called, a constant and a substantiall-humor, meddled in the body by opposite commixtions, the better part whereof in the end by outward & inward heat is advanced to blood in the body, whereby life is fed and maintained. Ingratitude, especially towards parents, the enemy to all graces. Voluptuous pleasures, gnaw in sunder the sinews of Fortitude. By the equinoxium is here meant a similitude, between a restless woman and the Ass, which is said in that season especially to bray twelve times in the day, and twelve times in the night. By the Physician his four times coming, is meant thus much: First he comes to hear his patient's confession, how he disordered himself at the diseases entrance, whereby to find the nature thereof, and state of the sick man's body: the second time, to minister Physic according to the diseased his grief: the third time, to launch into his disease by austereness of physic, to open the windows between life and death: the fourth time if he chance to come, it is to pronounce sentence of death. By the divers constructions of his disease, amongst his men, there is meant to be showed, the properties of the ignorant, for they ever take upon them still diversly, and for the most part, every one contrary to another in opinion. Because he hated to do well, he was therefore said to be in a frenzy, and to refuse the light Drowsy and voluptuous persons are also said to be in a lethargy, or deadly sickness, and so to stand in need of the air, and the light thereof. He was said to have a deadpalsey all over his body, because it is a disease of the sinews, weakening the strength and most effectual parts of operation in a man's body wholly and at once, surprising life and nature, so that death cannot be resisted in such a one. Caonia is a part of Epirus, a region in Greece, wherein is a wood called Dodoni, haunted with a multitude of Stockdoves, whereupon this prover became, Caoniae columbae, crafty Pigeons of Caonia, because the year before the great preparation of ships which the Greeks' made, these birds fore seeing the downfall of the wood, fled into another country. This crafty Franckling likewise, dwelling by a harmless Gentleman, from whom, without doing any desert, he was sure to receive benefit, was content to give him check mate. But when one was coming to possess the foresaid Gentleman's seat, which was like more straightly to look into this churl his unworthiness, him he calleth a Hawk, whose coming he may not abide to here tell off. Of all birds this Dove is said to be most privy to the nature of a hawk, and to live in most contempt of hawks. Covetous men, in this place, are called the devils Falconers, because it is the property of them, when they are seized of their prey, and gotten into their talents more than they can well gripe, or need to gorge themselves upon, yet in that while, if there come any other pray by, which is like to be within their mastery and command, they force themselves at that also, which showeth their cormorant desire to be snatching. Besides, from the height of their stand, they are able to make many slights, and such as by their swift and fast flying, are neither seen nor heard, till they be seized of that they pursue. The Pheasant here, his blood is praised, because it is medicinable and effectual to many good purposes. By the Stockdoves breasting, to drive the Pheasant from her stand or pearke, I take it is meant lack Straw, Wat Tiler, and the rest of his fellow rebels in Richard the seconds days, who by their rustic and rude billing at the Pheasant, would have put back the best blooded bird within this wood, from his high perch, had they not been prevented by the virtuous endeavour of such an excellent worthy, as for his virtuous act at that time showed, hath enriched many others since, to a degree of worthiness, and that for his virtues sake. Dione is the mother of Venus, to whom chits and bawds are said to pray unto, to ripen their young plants, and to make them slack, pliant, and ready for their harvest: and that their young heiffors may grow to use for the yoke and the pail, sooner if it were possible, than nature requireth. The other star here meant, is called Luciferum, Venus her own star, to whom bawds are wont to complain, when they were deceived or rob of any of their sequestered weanlings: desiring by her light, that they may be restored to the knowledge where they are: beseeching also her aid to be revenged of those wrongs, in as much as she hath taken them into her protection, to whom they are sworn by oath never to forsake that profession. By an Eunuch here, is meant an officer to keep good rule in gentlewomen's chambers, or else such a one altogether, which the bawd hath in charge, to keep Cupid's tender sacrifices inviolated. The Bawds house is called a Hive, in respect that as in a Hive all Bees are so like one another, that they cannot be discerned: so within this hive of good fellowship, there is to be found such a swarm of perfect ill conditions, that you cannot discern who is the worst. The riotor or unsatiat body, here is called a Didopper, because the kind of this bird delights in many changes of puddles and unclean waters. The bitterness of these dialoguers displeasures, is especially extended against those, that by excessive riot and wantonness, pull down the renown of their ancestors, decaying thereby themselves and their children, greatly shaming beside, to see waterbearers, and such as have done most mean and despised services unto them, to become better worth, and more able to live then these ungracious kind of consumers. Aeneas was not called a godly and an happy man, because he carried away with him from the destruction of Troy sixteen dissents of Grandfathers, that never foiled the reputations of their first ancestors, but rather chiefly, in that through his laborious and painful virtues, he was able to restore his decayed house to former happiness, being so blest of God, that before he died he saw a large propagation of his own progeny and natural blood, to flourish again by his industrious labours. To the Gentlewoman's comparison of breeding horses, I have thought good to add Virgil's words, concerning the excellency of their first nature. A horse saith he, from his first foaling, that is duly bred, lifteth up himself with such steps, gate and pace, as willever after prove proper unto him. And at the first he is of boldness to venture and to pass over hard and unknown things, fierce then also to go against dangers, as waters, hedges, ditches, and such like. Besides, to be so instant and hot in courage, that he fears no sudden or tumultuous noise, as armour, shot, or outcries of men. Showing further by his breath, ears, and other parts about him, such animosity, that sometime with his courageous high neighing, he seems to fill the places round about him, and to divide the air near unto him. Afterwards, with such boldness you shall see him insult upon an enemy in the field, under his rider, that you would imagine through the force of his generosity, he had a desire to pull the Lance or Curtle-axe from out the enemy's hand. If there be such worthy things peculiar and proper to beasts in their first natures, let no man doubt, but there is a more divine and effectual force by the secret and mystical provision of nature, properly to descend from one worthy man to another. Where he saith, happy were the children of such destroying fathers, if they might be borne again, I take it, he means their happiness, which by new fathers may be adopted, to make good their first birthright, whereof they were fraudulently deceived. By that he would have their father's new christened again, it is not meant by water of a new fountain, but rather as I take it, by the mercy of God to be redeemed from that curse, which some children are said to have given them in their cradles. Where he saith, there wanted unity between their parents, at their conception, it is not meant that they were not gotten without concirtation, or the lifting up of both their consents: but rather that they were begotten against the grace of God, as those are that proceed from forced marriages, where wanted agreement of hearts, which is called a false and an unchristian conjunction of bodies. Where the father is said to carry his sons cloak-bag, is meant such a man, as having gotten a reputation amongst his neighbours, to be holden and reputed honest, with the credit thereof is contented to colour and excuse to his power, his sons lewdnesses. It is good for the world in time, to see to the fraudulent intents of such, which carry their sons cloak bags: and also warily to look to such princocks, as put their fathers in their pockets at their pleasures. When such young masters begin to gentle it, strifes, dissensions, and law suits, are made rife and cumbersome in the world. Then have Gentlemen, and the well disposed of all sorts, great cause to look to themselves, and to hold these Boarepigs and Bear whelps at the staves end, who for all their slicked coats and smooth tongues, understand not what courteous behaviour and gentle deeds mean. They that think to carry candles before these young devils, are in great danger to be stifled with their stinking snuffs. The moderate Gentlemen, that have to do with these hoydens, shallbe sure to reap in churlishness, what they sow in courtesy. By the Panacea or suppling plaster in this place, is meant forewarning rules for them, who know not how to guide themselves, and have made themselves weak through babish pucillanimitie, that they might yet with an after-wit, strengthen themselves with that which remains, if they have not already made a bloody defect, and slaughtered themselves with that weapon that was left them by their worthy ancestors, to defend themselves. To those that have not set themselves besides the eushion, let this teach them not to admit strange masters and comers into their father's houses and heritage's: and that because Kites can be no goodkeepers of Chickens. Likewise, for those that have meddled too far already, unless there be but one way with them, and that they be passed remedy to be redeemed: let I say, this caveat persuade them, that it is surer standing upon flesh legs, then upon wooden stiltes, and that it is surer holding with both the hands then with one. Let them further beware, that their livings provided by their friends, prove not Tantalus his orchards, by which is signified, that there are good things coming towards men, if for want of grace they do not prevent it themselves. The whole intent of these two careful father's speeches, within this dialogue, hath been to teach all sorts of men, especially Gentlemen, to beware of self-will and self-love, prescribing remedies withal, how to keep men from aspiring, and coveting greater things, than their likelihoods can perform: showing also in especial, how inward virtues are the means to advance and set men up in approved degrees of worthiness, and not base riches, gestures, apparel, nor hypocritical policy, which of all the rest stains them most, who in place of justice, with greediness practise nothing else. By love-tales and other ordinary matters within this book, is meant no more but this, to show into how manifold dangerous precipitations (by playing rex with themselves) Gentleman in this age are fallen into. As by too gaudy and too gorgeous apparel; then with voluptous and excess diet; then beside, with too outrageous and wanton luxury, whereby they unnaturally destroy, first their bodies, then ungraciously lose their souls, and last of all mercilessly, and too too unkindly, deface the name and fame of themselves, their ancestors, and whole posterity. Now to conclude, I crave pardon at this time, in that I have not taken the pains to divide or distribute into several parts, this diverse discourse, neither so much as with marginal notes, lead the author's meaning in some words. The principal cause why I have omitted so to do, is because I had no purpose from the beginning, to wrong the speakers meanings. Therefore, look what errors I have added of myself, I have thought good to let them take their own places by themselves, hoping, such as come gently minded to the reading hereof, will allow me some liberty and pardon for a while, till with better leisure, I may be able more fitly to satisfy them.  
FINIS.   

Imprinted at London by Richard Field. 1594.