....^ „—■.-„ 
 
 -~— "- — *--»--*-■■ 
 
 01 
 
 Nmbsi 
 
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CORNELL 
 
 UNIVERSITY 
 
 LIBRARY 
 
By the same Author. 
 Grown 8vo. cloth extra. 
 
 THE NEW REPUBLIC: 
 
 OR, CULTURE, FAITH, AND PHILOSOPHY IN AN 
 ENGLISH COUNTRY HOUSE. 
 
 OPINIONS OF THE PRESS. 
 
 ' An attractive philosophical fragment, set in an idyllic frame. 
 . . . Considerable tact and art have been shown in the composition 
 of the story. . . . Not often does it fall to any one's lot to meet in 
 real life such brilliant talkers, and it is therefore a treat to come 
 upon them in a book, especially as their conversation is so simple 
 and naturally given as to cheat one into a belief that they are 
 really enjoying that almost lost fine art. . . . Nothing, as one reads, . 
 can seem more natural than the style and method of the book. It 
 never becomes tedious, and deep as are many of the subjects treated 
 of, they are yet topics we are all accustomed to hear debated. . . . 
 Without making too long and large quotations, it is difficult to give 
 an idea of the spirit and grace with which The Netv RejmbMe is 
 written.'— Times. 
 
 ' The one fault of this very clever jeud'esprit is, that the satire 
 is too closely dependent on mere parody, which imparts sometimes 
 too direct a personal reference. This once said, there is nothing 
 but to enjoy the refined fun, and sometimes earnest pleasantry, 
 with which the book abounds. . . . The writer is not only familiar 
 with society and its ways, he not only possesses large knowledge, 
 but he has the faculty of a sparkling epigrammatic style, and the 
 careful reader will find in the midst of his fun and satire some very 
 beautiful thoughts, gathered into felicitous and striking language.' 
 
 British Quarterly Review. 
 
 • There is a good deal of shrewd observation in The New Re- 
 public ; the style is polished, and its general air of cultivation and 
 refinement will help to atone for its almost complete lack of 
 incident and passion.' — Daily News. 
 
 < The great charm of the book lies in the clever and artistic way 
 the dialogue is managed, and the diverse and various expedients by 
 which, whilst the tone of thought on every page is kept at a high 
 pitch, it never loses its realistic aspect. . . . It is giving high praise 
 to a work of this sort to say that it absolutely needs to be taken as 
 a whole, and that disjointed extracts here and there would entirely 
 fail to convey any idea of the artistic unity, the careful and con- 
 scientious sequence of what is evidently the brilliant outcome of 
 much patient thought and study. . . . Enough has now been said to 
 recommend these volumes to any reader who desires something 
 above the usual novel, something which will open up lanes of thought 
 
THE NEW REPUBLIC. 
 
 in his own mind, and insensibly introduce a higher standard into 
 his daily life. . . . Here is novelty indeed, as well as originality, 
 and to anyone who can appreciate or understand The New Republic 
 it cannot fail to be a rare treat.' — Observer. 
 
 * A book to read, to rejoice in, and to remember. ... It is only 
 very dull or very bigoted persons who will misunderstand its 
 meaning, or who will fail to see that, if it furnishes few weapons to 
 the faithful, it blunts and breaks a goodly array of the swords and 
 spears of the unbelievers.'— Standard. 
 
 ' This is a very ambitious book. It is a bold thing for a young 
 man to challenge comparison with Plato. . . . The book will be read, 
 we should think, with great zest at the Universities, where alone, 
 perhaps, some of the more secret touches of its satire will be fully 
 appreciated. . . . The interlocutors in the book not only talk, but 
 are admirably adapted to be the cause of talk in others.' — Examiner. 
 
 ' A very original and suggestive work. If we could imagine Mr. 
 Anthony Trollope and Sir Arthur Helps combined, with a slight 
 gowpqon of Mr. Matthew Arnold, we might get pretty near to the 
 leading characteristics of the book. It is clearly written by a man 
 who knows society and can discriminate and deal readily with its 
 typical personages, and who has the unique faculty of presenting 
 actual living men under thin disguises, with the slightest touch of 
 satire extravaganza, which does not in the least detract from the 
 general truth of the picture, and yet carries with it almost the in- 
 terest of fiction. ... It is from first to last ingenious, humorous, 
 and suggestive.' — Nonconformist. 
 
 ' So clever a book, despite its faults, that it deserves criticism of 
 the admonitory rather than the objurgatory kind. . . . Here is a 
 man who can write epigrams, and we hope that he will write 
 more. ' — Athen^um. 
 
 'A decidedly clever book. There is plenty of epigram in its 
 literary style. . . . There is a very clever imitation of Mr. Matthew 
 Arnold's (Mr. Luke) poetry; but the best parody in the book is that 
 of a sermon of Mr. Jowett, and this is really so good that it might 
 well be a reminiscence of a discourse actually delivered in Balliol 
 Chapel.' — The World. 
 
 ' The introduction of living personages under transparent dis- 
 guises, to point the moral and adorn the tale of The New Republic, 
 cannot be justified, and should not be encouraged. This is, never- 
 theless, a naughty world, and it is more than probable that the 
 obnoxious story will be the first item to which readers in general 
 will refer. The parodies of some of our most conspicuous theological, 
 scientific, and philosophical guides are unquestionably happy.' — 
 Illustrated London News. 
 
 SCE1BNEE & WELFORD, New York. 
 
THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA 
 
 OR 
 
 #o£ittiu0m on an 3(£lanb 
 
 BY 
 
 W. H. MALLOCK 
 
 AUTHOR OF 'THE NEW REPUBLIC' ETC. 
 
 ' Pessitttism as to the essential dignity of -man is one of the surest 
 marks of the enervating influence of this dream of a celestial glory ' 
 
 Mr Frederic Harrison 
 
 FOURTH EDITION 
 
 NEW YORK 
 
 scribner and 1 Telford 
 
' Those who can read the signs of the times read in them 
 that the kingdom of man is at hand ' — Professor Clifford 
 
 Thou art smitten, O God, thou art smitten ; thy curse is 
 
 upon thee, O Lord ! 
 And the love song of earth as thou diest, resounds through 
 
 the wind of its wings, 
 Glory to man in the highest, for man is the master of 
 
 things 
 
 Songs before Sunrise 
 
CONTENTS. 
 
 Chapter I. . 
 
 •>■} 
 
 II. 
 
 jj 
 
 III. . 
 
 ?5 
 
 IV. 
 
 JJ 
 
 V. . 
 
 i) 
 
 VI. 
 
 5) 
 
 VII. . 
 
 )) 
 
 VIII. 
 
 J) 
 
 IX. . 
 
 JJ 
 
 X. 
 
 « 
 
 XI. . 
 
 J? 
 
 XII. - 
 
 J) 
 
 XIII. . 
 
 PAGE 
 
 I 
 
 5 
 
 *3 
 21 
 
 28 
 
 39 
 4 « 
 
 52 
 62 
 66 
 
 73 
 80 
 
 85 
 
vi CONTENTS. 
 
 PAGE 
 
 Chapter XIV. 93 
 
 XV. ioo 
 
 XVI. ... ■ 108 
 
 XVII. . • • • "6 
 
 XVIII. 123 
 
 Notes ..■••• J 35 
 
U — Uj-JIj- Jl_ Jl_ — JTT — IT ITT — II. J| II -.11 - J|- 
 
 THE 
 
 NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 
 
 CHAPTER I. 
 
 HE magnificent ocean-steamer 
 the Australasian was bound- 
 for England, on her homeward 
 voyage from Melbourne, carrying Her 
 Majesty's mails and ninety-eight first- 
 class passengers. Never did vessel start 
 under happier auspices. The skies were 
 cloudless ; the sea was smooth as glass. 
 There was not a sound of sickness to 
 
2 THE MEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 be heard anywhere ; and when dinner- 
 time came there was not a single ab- 
 sentee nor an appetite wanting. 
 
 But the passengers soon discovered 
 they were lucky in more than weather. 
 Dinner was hardly half over before two 
 of the company had begun to attract 
 general attention ; and every one all 
 round the table was wondering, in whis- 
 pers, who they could possibly be. 
 
 One of the objects of this delightful 
 curiqsity was a large-boned, middle-aged 
 man, with gleaming spectacles, and lank, 
 untidy hair ; whose coat fitted him so ill, 
 and who held his head so high, that 
 one saw at a glance he was some great 
 celebrity. The other was a beautiful lady 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 3 
 
 of about thirty years of age, the like of 
 ■whom nobody present had ever seen be- 
 fore. She had the fairest hair and the 
 darkest eyebrows, the largest eyes and 
 the smallest waist conceivable ; art and 
 nature had been plainly struggling as to 
 which should do the most for her ; whilst 
 her bearing was so haughty and distin- 
 guished, her glance so tender, and her 
 dress so expensive and so fascinating, 
 that she seemed at the same time to 
 defy and to court attention. 
 
 Evening fell on the ship with a soft 
 warm witchery. The air grew purple, 
 and the waves began to glitter in the 
 moonlight. The passengers gathered in 
 
 knots upon the deck, and the distin- 
 B 2 
 
4 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 
 
 guished strangers were still the subject of 
 conjecture. At last the secret was dis- 
 covered by the wife of an old colonial 
 judge ; and the news spread like wildfire. 
 In a few minutes all knew that there 
 were on board the Australasian no less 
 personages than Professor Paul Darnley 
 and the superb Virginia St. John. 
 
~^p — <p- — *C "V — V V V" "V — ^- 
 
 CHAPTER II. 
 
 >ISS ST. JOHN had, for at 
 least six years, been the most 
 renowned woman in Europe. 
 In Paris and St. Petersburg, no less than 
 in London, her name was equally familiar 
 both to princes and to pot-boys ; indeed, 
 the gaze of all the world was fixed on 
 her. Yet, in spite of this exposed situa- 
 tion, scandal had proved powerless to 
 wrong her ; she defied detraction. Her 
 enemies could but echo her friends' praise 
 
6 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 of her beauty ; her friends could but con- 
 firm her enemies' description of her cha- 
 racter. Though of birth that might almost 
 be called humble, she had been connected 
 with the heads of many distinguished 
 families ; and so general was the affection 
 she inspired, and so winning the ways 
 in which she contrived to retain it, that 
 she found herself, at the age of thirty, 
 mistress of nothing except a large for- 
 tune. She was now converted with sur- 
 prising rapidity by a Ritualistic priest, and 
 she became in a few months a model 
 of piety and devotion. She made lace 
 trimmings for the curate's vestments ; 
 she bowed at church as often and pro- 
 foundly as possible; she enjoyed nothing 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. -j 
 
 so much as going to confession ; she 
 learnt to despise the world. Indeed, such 
 utter dross did her riches now seem to 
 her, that, despite all the arguments of 
 her ghostly counsellor, she remained con- 
 vinced that they were far too worthless to 
 offer to the Church, and she saw nothing 
 for it but to still keep them for herself. 
 The mingled humility and discretion of 
 this resolve so won the heart of a gifted 
 colonial bishop, then on a visit to Eng- 
 land, that, having first assured himself 
 that Miss St. John was sincere in making 
 it, he besought her to share with him 
 his humble mitre, and make him the 
 happiest prelate in the whole Catholic 
 Church. Miss St. John consented. The 
 
8 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 nuptials were celebrated with the most 
 elaborate ritual, and after a short honey- 
 moon the bishop departed for his South 
 Pacific diocese of the Chasuble Islands, 
 to prepare a home for his bride, who 
 was to follow him by the next steamer. 
 
 Professor Paul Darnley, in his own 
 walk of life, was even more famous 
 than Virginia had been in hers. He had 
 written three volumes on the origin of 
 life, which he had spent seven years in 
 looking for in infusions of hay and cheese ; 
 he had written five volumes on the en- 
 tozoa of the pig, and two volumes of 
 lectures, as * a corollary to these, on the 
 sublimity of human heroism and the 
 whole duty of man. He was renowned 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 9 
 
 all oyer Europe and America as a com- 
 plete embodiment of enlightened modern 
 thought. He criticised everything ; he 
 took nothing on trust, except the unspeak- 
 able sublimity of the human race and its 
 august terrestrial destinies. And, in his 
 double capacity of a seer and a savant, he 
 had destroyed all that the world had be- 
 lieved in the past, and revealed to it all 
 that it is going to feel in the future. His 
 mind indeed was like a sea, into which the 
 other great minds of the age discharged 
 themselves, and in which all the slight 
 discrepancies of the philosophy of the pre- 
 sent century mingled together and formed 
 one harmonious whole. Nor was he less 
 successful in his own private life. He 
 
io THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA ; 
 
 married, at the age of forty, an excellent 
 evangelical lady, ten years his senior, who 
 wore a green gown, grey corkscrew curls, 
 and who had a fortune of two hundred 
 thousand pounds. Deeply pledged though 
 she was to the most vapid figments of 
 Christianity, Mrs. Darnley was yet proud 
 beyond measure of her husband's world- 
 wide fame, for she did but imperfectly 
 understand the grounds of it. Indeed, the 
 only thing that marred her happiness was 
 the single tenet of his that she had really 
 mastered. This, unluckily, was that he dis- 
 believed in hell. And so, as Mrs. Darn- 
 ley conceived that that place was designed 
 mainly to hold those who doubted its 
 existence, she daily talked her utmost, 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. u 
 
 and left no text unturned to convince 
 her darling of his very dangerous error. 
 These assiduous arguments soon began 
 to tell. The Professor grew moody and 
 brooding, and he at last suggested to his 
 medical man that a . voyage round the 
 world, unaccompanied by his wife, was 
 the prescription most needed by his fail- 
 ing patience. Mrs. Darnley at length 
 consented with a fairly good grace. She 
 made her husband pledge himself that 
 he would not be absent for above a 
 twelvemonth, or else, she said, she should 
 immediately come after him. She bade 
 him the tenderest of adieus, and pro- 
 mised to pray till his return for his re- 
 covery of a faith in hell. 
 
12 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA, 
 
 The Professor, who had but exceeded 
 his time by six months, was now on 
 board the Australasian, homeward bound 
 to his wife. Virginia was outward bound 
 to her husband. 
 
CHAPTER III. 
 
 jHE sensation created by the 
 presence of these two celebri- 
 ties was profound beyond de- 
 scription; and the passengers were never 
 weary of watching the gleaming spec- 
 tacles and the square-toed boots of the 
 one, and the liquid eyes and the ravishing 
 toilettes of the other. Virginia's acquaint- 
 ance was made almost instantly by three 
 pale-faced curates, and so well did their 
 friendship prosper, that they soon sang 
 
14 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 at nightfall with her a beautiful vesper 
 hymn. Nor did the matter end here, for 
 the strains sounded so lovely, and Virginia 
 looked so devotional, that most of the 
 passengers the night after joined in a 
 repetition of this touching evening office. 
 The Professor, as was natural, held 
 quite aloof, and pondered over a new 
 species of bug, which he had found 
 very plentiful in his berth. But it soon 
 occurred to him that he often heard 
 the name of God being uttered other- 
 wise than in swearing. He listened 
 more attentively to the sounds which 
 he had at first set down as negro- 
 melodies, and he soon became convinced 
 that they were something whose very 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 15 
 
 existence he despised himself for re- 
 membering — namely, Christian hymns. 
 He then thought of the three curates, 
 whose existence he despised himself 
 for remembering also. And the con- 
 viction rapidly dawned on him that, 
 though the passengers seemed fully 
 alive to his fame as a man of science, 
 they could yet know very little of all 
 that science had done for them ; and of 
 the death-blow it had given to the foul 
 superstitions of the past. He therefore 
 resolved that next day he would preach 
 them a lay-sermon. 
 
 At the appointed time the passengers 
 gathered eagerly round him — all but 
 Virginia, who retired to her cabin 
 
i6 7 HE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 when she saw that the preacher wore 
 no surplice, as she thought it would 
 be a mortal sin to listen to a sermon 
 without one. 
 
 The Professor began amidst a pro- 
 found silence. He first proclaimed to his 
 hearers the great primary axiom on which 
 all modern thought bases itself. He told 
 them that there was but one order of 
 things — it was so much neater than 
 two ; and if we would be certain of any- 
 thing, we must never doubt this. Thus, 
 since countless things exist that the senses 
 can take account of, it is evident that 
 nothing exists that the senses can not 
 take account of. The senses can take 
 no account of God ; therefore God does 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 17 
 
 not exist. Men of science can only see 
 theology in a ridiculous light, therefore 
 theology has no side that is not ridiculous. 
 He then told them a few of the names 
 that enlightened thinkers had applied to 
 the Christian deity — how Professor Tyn- 
 dall had called him an 'atom-manufac- 
 turer,' and Professor Huxley a ' pedantic 
 drill-sergeant.' The passengers at once 
 saw how demonstrably at variance with 
 fact was all religion, and they laughed 
 with a sense of humour that was quite 
 new to them. The Professor's tones then 
 became more solemn, and, having extin- 
 guished error, he at once went on to 
 unveil the brilliant light of truth. He 
 showed them how, viewed by modern 
 c 
 
18 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 science, all existence is a chain, with a 
 gas at one end and no one knows what 
 at the other ; and how Humanity is a 
 link somewhere ; but — holy and awful 
 thought ! — we can none of us tell where. 
 ' However,' he proceeded, ' of one thing 
 we can be quite certain : all that is, is 
 matter ; the laws of matter are eter- 
 nal, and we cannot act or think with- 
 out conforming to them ; and if/ he said, 
 ' we would be solemn and high, and 
 happy, and heroic, and saintly, we have 
 but to strive and struggle to do what 
 we cannot for an instant avoid doing. 
 Yes,' he exclaimed, ' as the sublime 
 Tyndall tells us, let us struggle to at- 
 tain to a deeper knowledge of matter, 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 19 
 
 and a more faithful conformity to its 
 laws ! ' 
 
 The Professor would have proceeded, 
 but the weather had been rapidly grow- 
 ing rough, and he here became violently 
 sea-sick. 
 
 'Let us,' he exclaimed hurriedly, 
 'conform to the laws of matter and go 
 below.' 
 
 Nor was the advice premature. A 
 storm arose, exceptional in its sudden- 
 ness and its fury. It raged for two 
 days without ceasing. The Australasian 
 sprang a leak ; her steering gear was dis- 
 abled ; and it was feared she would go 
 ashore on an island that was seen dimly 
 through the fog to the leeward. The 
 c 2 
 
20 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 
 
 boats were got, in readiness. A quantity 
 of provisions and of the passengers' 
 baggage was already stowed in the cut- 
 ter ; when the clouds parted, the sun 
 came out again, and the storm subsided 
 almost as quickly as it rose. 
 
CHAPTER IV. 
 
 *>0 sooner were the ship's damages 
 in a fair way to be repaired 
 than the Professor resumed 
 his sermon. He climbed into the cutter, 
 which was still full of the passengers' 
 baggage, and sat down on the largest 
 of Virginia's boxes. This so alarmed 
 Virginia that she incontinently followed 
 the Professor into the cutter, to keep an 
 eye on her property; but she did not 
 forget to stop her ears with her fingers, 
 
22 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; , 
 
 that she might not be guilty of listening 
 to an unsurpliced minister. 
 
 The Professor took up the thread 
 of his discourse just where he had 
 broken it off. Every circumstance fa- 
 voured him. The calm sea was spark- 
 ling under the gentlest breeze ; all 
 Nature seemed suffused with gladness ; 
 and at two miles' distance was an en- 
 chanting island, green with every kind 
 of foliage, and glowing with the hues 
 of a thousand flowers. The Professor, 
 having reminded his hearers of what 
 nonsense they now thought all the 
 Christian teachings, went on to show 
 them the blessed results of this. Since 
 the God that we once called all-holy 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 23 
 
 is a fable, that Humanity is all-holy 
 must be a fact. Since we shall never 
 be sublime, and solemn, and unspeak- 
 ably happy hereafter, it is evident that 
 we can be sublime, and solemn, and 
 unspeakably happy here. 'This,' said 
 the Professor, 'is the new Gospel. It 
 is founded on exact thought. It is 
 the Gospel of the kingdom of man ; 
 and had I only here a microscope and 
 a few chemicals, I could demonstrate 
 its eternal truth to you. There is no 
 heaven to seek for; there is no hell 
 to shun. We have nothing to strive and 
 live for except to be unspeakably happy.' 
 
 This eloquence was received with 
 enthusiasm. The captain in particular, 
 
24 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 who had a wife in every port he 
 touched at, was overjoyed at hearing 
 that there was no hell ; and he sent 
 for all the crew, that they might learn 
 the good news likewise. But soon the 
 general gladness was marred by a sound 
 of weeping. Three-fourths of the passen- 
 gers, having had time to reflect a little, 
 began exclaiming that as a matter of fact 
 they were really completely miserable, 
 and that for various reasons they could 
 never be anything else. ' My friends,' 
 said the Professor, quite undaunted, 
 'that is doubtless completely true. You 
 are not happy now ; you probably never 
 will be. But that, I can assure you, is of 
 very little moment. Only conform faith 
 
OK, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 25 
 
 fully to the laws of matter, and your 
 children's children will be happy in the 
 course of a few centuries ; and you 
 will like that far, far better than being 
 happy yourselves. Only consider the 
 matter in this light, and you yourselves 
 will in an instant become happy also ; 
 and whatever you say, and whatever you 
 do, think only of the effect it will have 
 five hundred years afterwards.' 
 
 At these solemn words, the anxious 
 faces grew calm. An awful sense of 
 the responsibility of each one of us, 
 and the infinite consequences of every 
 human act, was filling the hearts of all ; 
 when by a faithful conformity to the 
 laws of matter, the boiler blew up, 
 
26 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 • 
 
 and the Australasian went down. In 
 an instant, the air was rent with yells 
 and "cries; and all the Humanity that 
 was on board the vessel was busy, as 
 the Professor expressed it, uniting itself 
 with the infinite azure of the past. 
 Paul and Virginia, however, floated 
 quietly away, in the cutter, together 
 with the baggage and provisions. 
 
 Virginia was made almost senseless 
 by the suddenness of the catastrophe ; and 
 on seeing five sailors sink within three 
 yards of her, she fainted dead away. 
 The Professor begged her not to take 
 it so much to heart, as these were the 
 very men who had got the cutter in 
 readiness; 'and they are, therefore,' he 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 27 
 
 • 
 
 said, ' still really alive in the fact of 
 our happy escape.' Virginia, however, 
 being quite insensible, the Professor 
 turned to the last human being still 
 to be seen above the waters, and 
 shouted to him not to be afraid of 
 death, as there was certainly no hell, 
 and that his life, no matter how de- 
 graded and miserable, had been a glori- 
 ous mystery, full of infinite significance. 
 The next moment the struggler was 
 snapped up by a shark. Our friends, 
 meanwhile, borne by a current, had been 
 drifting rapidly towards the island. And 
 the Professor, spreading to the breeze 
 Virginia's beautiful lace parasol, soon 
 brought the cutter to- the shore on a 
 beach of the softest sand. 
 
CHAPTER V. 
 
 HE scene that met Paul's eyes 
 was one of extreme loveli- 
 ness. He found himself in 
 a little fairy bay, full of translucent 
 waters, and fringed with silvery sands. 
 On either side it was protected by 
 fantastic rocks, and in the middle it 
 opened inland to an enchanting valley, 
 where tall tropical trees made a grate- 
 ful shade, and where the ground was 
 
THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 29 
 
 carpeted with the softest moss and 
 turf. 
 
 Paul's first care was for his fair com- 
 panion. He spread a costly cashmere 
 shawl on the beach, and placed her, still 
 fainting, on this. In a few moments 
 she opened her eyes ; but was on the 
 point of fainting again as the horrors 
 of the last half-hour came back to her, 
 when she caught sight in the cutter of 
 the largest of her own boxes, and she 
 began to recover herself. Paul begged 
 her to remain quiet whilst he went to 
 reconnoitre. 
 
 He had hardly proceeded twenty, 
 yards into the valley, when to his in- 
 finite astonishment he came on a charm- 
 
30 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 ing cottage, built under the shadow of 
 a bread-tree, with a broad verandah, 
 plate-glass windows, and red window- 
 blinds. His first thought was that this 
 could be no desert island at all, but some 
 happy European settlement. But, on 
 approaching the cottage, it proved to be 
 quite untenanted, and from the cob- 
 webs woven across the doorway it seemed 
 to have been long abandoned. Inside 
 there was abundance of luxurious fur- 
 niture ; the floors were covered with 
 gorgeous Indian carpets ; and there was 
 a pantry well stocked with plate and 
 glass and table-linen. The Professor 
 could not tell what to make of it, till, 
 examining the structure more closely, he 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 31 
 
 found it composed mainly of a ship's 
 timbers. This seemed to tell its own 
 tale, and he at once concluded that he 
 and Virginia were not the first castaways 
 who had been forced to make the island 
 for some time their dwelling-place. 
 
 Overjoyed at this discovery, he has- 
 tened back to Virginia. She was by 
 
 1 
 
 this time apparently quite recovered, 
 and was kneeling on the cashmere 
 shawl, with a rosary in her hands de- 
 signed especially for the use of Anglo- 
 Catholics, alternately lifting up her eyes 
 in gratitude to heaven, and casting them 
 down in anguish at her torn and 
 crumpled dress. The poor Professor was 
 horrified at the sight of a human being 
 
32 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 in this degrading attitude of superstition. 
 But as Virginia quitted it with alacrity 
 as soon as ever he told his news to her, 
 he hoped he might soon convert her into 
 a sublime and holy Utilitarian. 
 
 The first thing she besought him to 
 do was to carry her biggest box to 
 this charming cottage, that she might 
 change her clothes, and appear in 
 something fit to^ be seen in. The 
 Professor most obligingly at once did 
 as she asked him ; and whilst she was 
 busy at her toilette, he got from the 
 cutter what provisions he could, and 
 proceeded to lay. the table. When all 
 was ready, he rang a gong which he 
 found suspended in the lobby; Virginia 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 33 
 
 appeared shortly in a beautiful pink 
 dressing-gown, embroidered with silver 
 flowers ; and just before sunset the two 
 sat down to a really excellent meal. 
 The bread-tree at the door of the cot- 
 tage contributed some beautiful French 
 rolls; close at hand also they discovered 
 a butter-tree; and the Professor had 
 produced from the cutter a variety of 
 salt and potted meats, p&ti de foie gras, 
 cakes, preserved fruits, and some bottles 
 of fine champagne. This last helped 
 much to raise their spirits. Virginia 
 found it very dry, and exactly suited to 
 her palate. She had but drunk five 
 glasses of it, when her natural smile 
 returned to her, though she was much 
 
 D 
 
34 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 disappointed because Paul took no no- 
 tice of her dressing-gown, and when she 
 had drunk three glasses more she quietly 
 went to sleep on the sofa. 
 
 The moon had by this time risen in 
 dazzling splendour, and the Professor 
 went out and lighted a cigar. All 
 during dinner there had been a feeling 
 of dull despair in his heart, which even 
 the champagne did not dissipate. But 
 now, as he surveyed in the moonlight 
 the wondrous Paradise in which his 
 strange fate had cast him, his mood 
 changed. The air was full of the scents 
 of a thousand night-smelling flowers ; 
 the sea murmured on the beach' in soft, 
 voluptuous cadences. The Professor's 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON Ah ISLAND. 35 
 
 cigar was excellent. He now saw his 
 situation in a truer light. Here was a 
 bountiful island, where earth unbidden 
 brought forth all her choicest fruits, and 
 most of the luxuries of civilisation had 
 already been wafted thither. Existence 
 here seemed to be purified from all its 
 evils. Was not this the very condition 
 of things which all the sublimest and v 
 exactest thinkers of modern times had 
 been dreaming and lecturing and writing 
 books about for a good half-century? 
 Here was a place where Humanity could 
 do justice to itself, and realise those 
 glorious destinies which all exact thinkers 
 take for granted must be in store for it. 
 True, from the mass of Humanity he was 
 
 D 2 
 
36 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 completely cut away ; but Virginia was 
 his companion. Holiness, and solemnity, 
 and unspeakably significant happiness did 
 not, he argued, depend on the multiplica- 
 tion table. He and Virginia represented 
 Humanity as well as a million couples. 
 They were a complete humanity in them- 
 selves, and humanity in a perfectible 
 shape ; and the very next day they would 
 make preparations for fulfilling their holy 
 destiny, and being as solemnly and un- 
 speakably happy as it was their stern 
 duty to be. 
 
 The Professor turned his eyes up- 
 wards to the starry heavens, and a 
 sense came over him of the eternity and 
 the immensity of Nature, and the de- 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 37 
 
 monstrable absence of any intelligence 
 that guided it. These reflections natu- 
 rally brought home to him with more 
 vividness the stupendous and boundless 
 importance of Man. His bosom swelled 
 violently, and he cried aloud, his eyes 
 still fixed on the firmament, 'Oh, impor- 
 tant All ! oh, important Me ! ' 
 
 When he came back to the cottage 
 he found Virginia just getting off the 
 sofa, and preparing to go to bed. 
 She was too sleepy even to say good- 
 night to him, and with evident want of 
 temper was tugging at the buttons of her 
 dressing-gown. ' Ah ! ' she murmured as 
 she left the room, 'if God, in His infinite 
 mercy, had only spared my maid!' 
 
38 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 
 
 Virginia's evident discontent gave 
 profound pain to Paul. ' How solemn,' 
 he exclaimed, ' for half Humanity to be 
 discontented!' But he was still more 
 disturbed at the appeal to a chimerical 
 manufacturer of atoms ; and he groaned 
 in tones of yet more sonorous sorrow, 
 ' How solemn for half Humanity to be 
 sunk lower than the beasts by super- 
 stition ! ' 
 
 However, he hoped that these stu- 
 pendous evils might, under the present 
 favourable conditions, vanish in the course 
 of a few days' progress; and he went to 
 bed, full of august auguries. 
 
CHAPTER VI. 
 
 )EXT morning he was up be- 
 times ; and the prospects of 
 Humanity looked more glo- 
 rious than ever. He gathered some of 
 the finest pats from the butter-tree, and 
 some fresh French rolls from the bread- 
 tree. He discovered a cow close at hand, 
 that allowed him at once to milk it ; 
 and a little roast pig ran up to him out 
 of the underwood, and fawning on him 
 with its trotters, said, 'Come, eat me.' 
 
40 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 The Professor vivisected it before Vir- 
 ginia's door, that its automatic noise, 
 which the vulgar call cries of pain, might 
 awaken her ; and he then set it in a hot 
 dish on the table. 
 
 ' It has come ! it has come ! ' he 
 shouted, rapturously, as Virginia entered 
 the room, this time in a blue silk dressing- 
 gown, embroidered with flowers of gold. 
 
 ' What has come ? ' said Virginia, pet- 
 tishly, for she was suffering from a terrible 
 headache, and the Professor's loud voice 
 annoyed her. ' You don't mean to say 
 that we are rescued, are we'?' 
 
 ' Yes,' answered Paul, solemnly ; ' we 
 are rescued. We are rescued from all 
 the pains and imperfections of a world 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 41 
 
 that has not learnt how to conform 
 to the laws of matter, and is but im- 
 perfectly acquainted with the science of 
 sociology. It " is therefore inevitable 
 that, the evils of existence being thus 
 removed, we shall both be solemnly, 
 stupendously, and unspeakably happy.' 
 
 ' Nonsense ! ' said ' Virginia, snappishly, 
 who thought the Professor was joking. 
 
 ' It is not nonsense,' said the Professor. 
 'It is deducible from the teachings of 
 John Stuart Mill, of Auguste Comte, of 
 Mr. Frederic Harrison, and of all the 
 exact thinkers who have cast off super- 
 stition, and who adore Humanity.' 
 
 Virginia meanwhile ate fidtd de foie 
 gras, of which she was passionately fond; 
 
42 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 and, growing a little less sullen, she at 
 last admitted that they were lucky in 
 having at least the necessaries of life left 
 to them. ' But as for happiness — there 
 is nothing to do here, there is no church 
 to go to, and you don't seem to care a 
 bit for my dressing-gown. What have 
 we got to make us happy ? ' • : 
 
 ' Humanity,' replied the Professor 
 eagerly, — ' Humanity, that divine entity, 
 which is necessarily capable of everything 
 that is. fine and invaluable, and is the 
 object of indescribable emotion to all 
 exact thinkers, And what is Humanity?' 
 he went on more earnestly ; ' you and I 
 are Humanity — you and I are that august 
 existence. You already are all the world 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 43 
 
 to me ; and I very soon shall be all the 
 world to you. Adored being, it will be 
 my mission and my glory to compel you 
 to live for me. And then, as modern 
 philosophy can demonstrate, we shall 
 both of us be significantly and unspeak- 
 ably happy.' 
 
 For a few moments Virginia merely 
 stared at Paul. Suddenly she turned 
 quite pale, her lips quivered, and ex- 
 claiming, ' How dare you ! — and I, too, 
 the wife of a bishop ! ' she left the room 
 in hysterics. 
 
 The Professor could make nothing 
 of this. Though he had dissected many 
 dead women, he knew very little of the' 
 hearts of live ones. A sense of shyness 
 
44 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 overpowered him, and he felt embar- 
 rassed, he could not tell why, at being 
 thus left alone with Virginia. He lit a 
 cigar and went out. Here was a to-do in- 
 deed, he thought. How would progress 
 be possible if one half of Humanity 
 misunderstood the other ? 
 
 He was thus musing, when suddenly 
 a voice startled him ; and in another 
 moment a man came rushing up to him, 
 with every demonstration of joy. 
 
 ' Oh, my dear master ! oh, emancipator 
 of the human intellect! and is it indeed 
 
 you ? Thank God ! 1 beg pardon for 
 
 my unspeakable blasphemy — I mean, 
 thank circumstances over which I have 
 no control.' 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 45 
 
 It was one of the three curates, whom 
 Paul had supposed drowned, but who 
 now related how he had managed to 
 swim ashore, despite the extreme length 
 of his black clerical coat. 'These rags 
 of superstition,' ' he said, ' did their best 
 to drown me. But I survive in spite of 
 them, to covet truth and to reject error. 
 Thanks to your glorious teaching,' he 
 went on, looking reverentially into the 
 Professor's face, ' the very notion of an 
 Almighty Father makes me laugh con- 
 sumedly, it is so absurd and so immoral. 
 Science, through your instrumentality, has 
 opened my eyes. I am now an exact 
 thinker.' 
 
 ' Do you believe,' said Paul ' in solemn, 
 
46 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA: 
 
 significant, and unspeakably happy Hu- 
 manity ? ' 
 
 ' I do,' said the curate, fervently. 
 ' Whenever I think of Humanity, I 
 groan and moan to myself out of sheer 
 solemnity.' 
 
 ' Then two thirds of Humanity,' said 
 the Professor, ' are thoroughly enlightened. 
 Progress will now go on smoothly.' 
 
 At this moment Virginia came out, 
 having rapidly recovered composure at 
 the sound of a new man's voice. 
 
 ' You here — you, too ! ' exclaimed the 
 curate. ' How solemn, how significant ! 
 
 This is truly Providential 1 mean this 
 
 has truly happened through conformity to 
 the laws of matter.' 
 
Off, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 47 
 
 ' Well,' said Virginia, ' since we have 
 a clergyman amongst us, we shall perhaps 
 be able to get on.' 
 
" ' " n " ■ " " " * " » " ** ^ -J 1L 
 
 -n — fi — o— ~s — h — o — v u u T a i o a — ir 
 
 CHAPTER VII. 
 
 HINGS now took a better turn. 
 The Professor ceased to feel 
 shy ; and proposed, when the 
 curate had finished an enormous break- 
 fast, that they should go down to the 
 cutter, and bring up the things in it to 
 the cottage. 'A few hours' steady pro- 
 gress/ he said, ' and the human race will 
 command all the luxuries of civilisation — 
 the glorious fruits of centuries of onward 
 labour. 
 
THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 49 
 
 The three spent a very busy morning 
 in examining and unpacking the luggage. 
 The Professor found his favourite collec- 
 tion of modern philosophers ; Virginia 
 found a large box of knick-knacks, with 
 which to adorn the cottage; and there 
 was, too, an immense store of wine and 
 of choice provisions. 
 
 ' It is rather sad,' sighed Virginia, as 
 she dived into a box of French choco- 
 late-creams, 'to think that all the poor 
 people are drowned that these things 
 belonged to.' 
 
 'They are not dead,' said the Pro- 
 fessor: 'they still live on this holy and 
 stupendous earth. They live in the use 
 we are making of all they had got 
 
 E 
 
SO THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 together. The owner of those choco- 
 late-creams is immortal because you 
 are eating them.' 
 
 Virginia licked her lips and said, 
 ' Nonsense ! ' 
 
 'It is not nonsense,' said the Pro- 
 fessor. ' It is the religion of Humanity.' 
 
 All day they were busy, and the 
 time passed pleasantly enough. Wines, 
 provisions, books, and china ornaments 
 were carried up to the cottage and 
 bestowed in proper places. Virginia 
 filled the glasses in the drawing-room 
 with gorgeous leaves and flowers; and 
 declared by the evening, as she looked 
 round her, that she could almost fancy 
 herself in St. John's Wood. 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 51 
 
 ' See,' said the Professor, ' how rapid 
 is the progress of material civilisation ! 
 Humanity is now entering on the fruits 
 of ages. Before long it will be in a 
 position to Be unspeakably happy.' 
 
 Virginia retired to bed early. The 
 Professor took the curate out with him 
 to look at the stars ; and promised to 
 lend him some writings of the modern 
 philosophers, which would make him 
 more perfect in the new view of things. 
 They said good-night, murmuring to- 
 gether that there was certainly no God, 
 that Humanity was very important, and 
 that everything was very solemn. 
 
 E 2 
 
—V -"J* ■&" 
 
 ~*C — ^P C XT— 
 
 CHAPTER VIII. 
 
 iEXT morning the curate began 
 studying a number of essays 
 that the Professor lent him, 
 all written by exact thinkers, who dis- 
 believed in God, and thought Humanity 
 adorable, and most important. Virginia 
 lay on the sofa, and sighed over one 
 of Miss Brough ton's novels ; and it oc- 
 curred to the Professor that the island 
 was just the place where, if anywhere, 
 the missing link might be found. 
 
THE NEW PAUL AND VIRG1MA. 53 
 
 ' Ah ! ' he exclaimed ; ' all is still pro- 
 gress. Material progress came to an 
 end yesterday. Mental progress has 
 begun to-day. One third of Humanity 
 is cultivating sentiment ; another third 
 is learning to covet truth. I, the re- 
 maining and most enlightened third, will 
 go and seek it. Glorious, solemn Hu- 
 manity! I will go and look about for 
 its arboreal ancestor.' 
 
 Every step the Professor took he 
 found the island more beautiful. But 
 he came back to luncheon, having been 
 unsuccessful in, his search. Events had 
 marched quickly in his absence. Vir- 
 ginia was at the beginning of her third 
 volume; and the curate had skimmed 
 
54 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 over so many essays, ' that he professed 
 himself able to give a thorough ac- 
 count of the want of faith that was in 
 him. 
 
 After luncheon the three sat together 
 in easy chairs, in the verandah, some- 
 times talking, sometimes falling into a 
 half-doze. They all agreed that they 
 were wonderfully comfortable, and the 
 Professor said — 
 
 'All Humanity is now at rest, and 
 in utter peace. It is just taking breath, 
 before it becomes unspeakably and sig- 
 nificantly happy.' 
 
 He would have said more, but he 
 was here startled by a piteous noise of 
 crying, and the three found themselves 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND, 55 
 
 confronted by an old woman dripping 
 with sea-water, and with an expression 
 on her face of the utmost misery. 
 They soon recognised her as one of 
 the passengers on the ship. She told 
 them how she had been floated ashore 
 on a spar, and how she had been sus- 
 tained by a little roast pig, that kindly 
 begged her to eat it, having first lain 
 in her bosom to restore her to warmth. 
 She was now looking for her son. 
 
 ' And if I cannot find him,' said the 
 old woman, ' I shall never smile again. 
 He has half broken my heart,' she went 
 on, ' by his wicked ways. But if I 
 thought he was dead — dead in the midst 
 of his sins — it would be broken alto- 
 
56 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 gether; for in that case he must cer- 
 tainly be in hell.' 
 
 ' Old woman,' said the Professor, 
 very slowly, and solemnly, ' be comforted. 
 I announce to you that your son is 
 alive.' 
 
 'Oh, bless you, sir, for that word!' 
 cried the old woman. ' But. where is 
 he ? Have you seen him ? Are you 
 sure that he is living ? ' 
 
 ' I am sure of it,' said the Professor, 
 'because enlightened thought shows me 
 that he cannot be anything else. It is 
 true that I saw him sink for a third 
 time in the sea, and that he was then 
 snapped up by a shark. But he is as 
 much alive as ever in his posthumous, 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 57 
 
 activities. He has made you wretched 
 after him ; and that is his future life. 
 Become an exact thinker, and you will 
 see that this is so. Old woman,' added 
 the Professor solemnly, ' old woman, 
 listen to me — You are your son in hell! 
 
 At this the old woman flew into a 
 terrible rage. 
 
 'In hell, sir!' she exclaimed; 'me 
 in hell ! — a poor lone woman like me ! 
 How dare you ! ' And she sank back 
 in a chair and fainted. 
 
 'Alas!' said the Professor, 'thus is 
 misery again introduced into the world. 
 A fourth part of Humanity is now' 
 miserable.' 
 
 The curate answered promptly that 
 
58 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 if no restoratives were given her, she 
 would probably die in a few minutes. 
 'And to let her die,' he said, 'is clearly 
 our solemn duty. It will be for the 
 greatest happiness of the greatest number.' 
 
 ' No,' said the Professor ; ' for our 
 sense of pity would then be wounded, 
 and the happiness 'of all of us would 
 be marred by that.' 
 
 'Excuse me,' said the curate; 'but 
 exact thought shows me that pity for 
 others is but the imagining of their 
 misfortune falling on ourselves. Now, 
 we can none of us imagine ourselves 
 exactly in the old woman's case; there- 
 fore it is quite impossible that we can 
 pity her.' 
 
UK, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 59 
 
 ' But,' said the Professor, ' such an 
 act would violate our ideas of justice.' 
 
 ' You are wrong again,' said the curate, 
 'for exact thought shows me that the 
 love of justice is nothing but the fear of 
 suffering injustice. If we were to kill 
 strong men, we might naturally fear that 
 strong men would kill us. But 'whatever 
 we do to fainting old women, we cannot 
 expect that fainting old women will, do 
 anything to us in return.' 
 
 ' Your reasoning cannot be sound,' 
 said the Professor, 'for it would lead to 
 the most horrible conclusions. I will 
 ( solve the difficulty better. I will make 
 the old woman happy, and therefore fit 
 to live. Old woman,' he exclaimed, 'let 
 
60 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 me beg you to consider this. You are 
 yourself by your own unhappiness ex- 
 piating your son's sins. Do but think of 
 that, and you will become unspeakably 
 happy.' 
 
 Meanwhile, however, the old woman 
 had died. When the Professor discovered 
 this he was somewhat shocked ; but at 
 length with a sudden change of counte- 
 nance, ' We neither of us did it,' he ex- 
 claimed ; ' her death is no act of ours. 
 It is part of the eternal not-ourselves 
 that makes for righteousness — righteous- 
 ness, which is, as we all know, but 
 another name for happiness. Let us 
 adore the event with reverence.' 
 
 ' Yes,' said the curate, ' we are well rid 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND, 61 
 
 of her. She was an immoral old woman, 
 for happiness is the test of morality, and 
 she was very unhappy.' 
 
 ' On the contrary,' said the Professor, 
 ' she was a moral old woman ; for she has 
 made us happy by dying so very oppor- 
 tunely. Let us speak well of the dead. 
 Her death has been a holy and a blessed 
 one. She has conformed to the laws of 
 matter. Thus is unhappiness destined to 
 fade out of the world. Quick ! let us tie 
 a bag of shot to all the sorrow and evil 
 of Humanity, which, after all, is only a 
 fourth part of it, and let us sink her in 
 the bay close at hand, that she may 
 catch lobsters for us.' 
 
CHAPTER IX. 
 
 JT last,' said the Professor, as 
 they began dinner that even- 
 ing, 'the fulness of time 
 has come. All the evils of Humanity- 
 are removed, and progress has come 
 to an end because it can go no fur- 
 ther. We have nothing now to do but 
 to be unspeakably and significantly 
 
 happy.' 
 
 The champagne flowed freely. Our 
 friends ate and drank of the best, their 
 spirits rose, and Virginia admitted that 
 
THE NEW JTAt/L AND VIRGINIA. 63 
 
 this was really 'jolly.' The sense of 
 the word pleased the Professor, but its 
 sound seemed below the gravity of the 
 occasion ; so he begged her to say ' sub- 
 lime ' instead. ' We can make it mean,' 
 he said, 'just the same, but we prefer it 
 for the sake of its associations.' 
 
 It soon, however, occurred to him that 
 eating and drinking were hardly delights 
 sufficient to justify the highest state of 
 human emotion, and he began to fear he 
 had been feeling sublime prematurely; 
 but in another moment he recollected 
 he was an altruist, and that the secret 
 of their happiness was not that any one 
 of them was happy, but that they each 
 knew the others were. 
 
64 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA ; 
 
 ' Yes, my dear curate, ' said the Pro- 
 fessor, ' what I am enjoying is the cham- 
 pagne that you drink, and what you are 
 enjoying is the champagne that I drink. 
 This is altruism ; this is benevolence ; 
 this is the sublime outcome of enlightened 
 modern thought. The pleasures of the 
 table, in themselves, are low and beastly 
 ones ; but if we each of us are only glad 
 because the others are enjoying them, 
 they become holy and glorious beyond 
 description.' 
 
 ' They do,' cried the curate rap- 
 turously, 'indeed they do. I will drink 
 another bottle for your sake. It is sub- 
 lime ! ' he said, as he tossed off three 
 glasses. 'It is significant ! ' he said as 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 65 
 
 he finished three more. ' Tell me, my 
 dear, do I look significant ? ' he added, 
 as he turned to Virginia, and suddenly 
 tried to crown the general bliss by kissing 
 her. 
 
 Virginia started back, looking fire and 
 fury at him. The Professor was com- 
 pletely astounded by an occurrence so 
 unnatural, and exclaimed in a voice of 
 thunder, ' Morality, sir — remember mo- 
 rality ! How dare you upset that which 
 Professor Huxley tells us must be for 
 ever strong enough to hold its own ? ' 
 
 But the last glass of champagne had 
 put the curate beyond the reach of exact 
 thought. He tumbled under the table, 
 and the Professor carried him off to bed. 
 
 F 
 
TT n 7i n n n n n — ir — n n — 71 — n ir 
 
 CHAPTER X. 
 
 HE Professor, like most serious 
 thinkers, knew but little of 
 that trifle commonly called 
 ' the world.' He had never kissed any- 
 one except his wife ; even that he did as 
 seldom as possible ; and the curate lying 
 dead drunk was the first glimpse he had of 
 what, par excellence, is described as ' life.' 
 But though the scene just recounted was 
 thus a terrible shock to him, in one 
 way it gave him an unlooked-for com- 
 
THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 67 
 
 fort. He had felt that even yet things 
 were not quite as sublime as they should 
 be. He now saw the reason. ' Of course,' 
 he said, ' existence cannot be perfect 
 so long as one third of Humanity makes 
 a beast of itself. A little more progress 
 must be still necessary.' 
 
 He hastened to explain this next morn- 
 ing to Virginia, and begged her not to 
 be alarmed at the curate's scandalous 
 conduct. ' Immorality,' he said, ' is but 
 a want of success in attaining our own 
 happiness. It is evidently most immoral 
 for the curate to be kissing you ; and 
 therefore kissing you. would not really 
 conduce to his happiness. I will con- 
 vince him of this solemn truth in a very 
 
 F 2 
 
68 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 few moments. Then the essential dig- 
 nity of human nature will become at 
 once apparent, and we shall all of us at 
 last begin to be unspeakably happy.' 
 
 The curate, hov/ever, altogether de 
 clined to be convinced. He maintained 
 stoutly that to kiss Virginia would be the 
 greatest pleasure that Humanity could 
 offer him. ' And if it is immoral as well 
 as pleasant,' he added, ' I should like it 
 all the better.' 
 
 At this the Professor gave a terrible 
 groan ; he dropped almost fainting into 
 a chair ; he hid his face in his hands ; 
 and murmured half-articulately, ' Then I 
 can't tell what to do ! ' In another in- 
 stant, however, he recovered himself ; and 
 
OH, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 69 
 
 fixing a dreadful look on the curate, ' That 
 last statement of yours,' he said, ' cannot 
 be true ; for if it were, it would upset 
 all my theories. It is a fact that can be 
 proved and verified, that if you kissed 
 Virginia it would make you miserable.' 
 
 ' Pardon me,' said the curate, rapidly 
 moving towards her, ' your notion is a 
 remnant of superstition ; I will explode 
 it by a practical experiment.' 
 
 The Professor caught hold of the 
 curate's coat-tails, and forcibly pulled him 
 back into his seat. 
 
 ' If you dare attempt it,' he said, ' I 
 will kick you soundly; and, shocking, 
 immoral man ! you will feel miserable 
 enough then.' 
 
70 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 The curate was a terrible coward, and 
 very weak as well. 'You are a great 
 hulking fellow,' he said, eyeing the Pro- 
 fessor ; ' and I am of a singularly delicate 
 build. I must, therefore, conform to the 
 laws of matter, and give in.' He said 
 this in a very sulky voice ; and, going 
 out of the room, slammed the door after 
 him. 
 
 A radiant expression suffused the face 
 of the Professor. ' See,' he said to Vir- 
 ginia, 'the curate's conversion is already 
 half accomplished. In a. few hours more 
 he will be rational, he will be moral, he 
 will be solemnly and significantly happy.' 
 
 The Professor talked like this to 
 Virginia the whole morning ; but in spite 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 71 
 
 of all his arguments, she declined to be 
 comforted. ' It is all very well,' she 
 said, ' whilst you are in the way. But 
 as soon as your back is turned, I know 
 he will be at me again.' 
 
 ' Will you never,' said Paul, by this 
 time a little irritated, ' will you never 
 listen to exact thought ? The curate is 
 now reflecting ; and a little . reflection 
 must inevitably convince him that he 
 does not really care to , kiss you, and 
 that it would give him very little real 
 pleasure to do so.' 
 
 ' Stuff ! ' exclaimed Virginia, with a 
 sudden vigour at which the Professor 
 was thunderstruck. ' I can tell you,' she 
 went on, 'that better men than he have 
 
72 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 
 
 borne kicks for my sake ; and to kiss 
 me is the only thing that that little man 
 cares about. — What shall I do ? ' she ex- 
 claimed, bursting into tears. ' Here is 
 one of you insulting me by trying to 
 kiss me ; and the other insulting me by 
 saying that I am not worth being kissed ! ' 
 ' Ah, me ! ' groaned the poor Professor 
 in an agony, ' here is one third of Hu- 
 manity plunged in sorrow ; and another 
 third has not yet freed itself from vice. 
 When, when, I wonder, will the sublimity 
 begin ? ' 
 
CHAPTER XL 
 
 [T dinner, however, things wore 
 a more promising aspect. The 
 curate had been so terrified 
 by the Professor's threats, that he hardly 
 dared to so much as look at Virginia ; 
 and to make up for it, he drank and drank 
 champagne, till the strings of his tongue 
 were loosed, and he was laughing and 
 chattering at a rate that was quite extraor- 
 dinary. Virginia, seeing herself thus neg- 
 lected by the curate, began to fear that, as 
 
74 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA, 
 
 Paul said, he really did not so much care 
 to kiss her after all. She, therefore, put 
 on all her most enticing ways ; she talked, 
 flirted, and smiled her best, and made 
 her most effective eyes, that the curate 
 might see what a prize was for ever 
 beyond his reach. 
 
 This state of affairs seemed full of 
 glorious promise. Virginia's tears were 
 dried, she had never looked so radiant 
 and exquisite before. The curate had 
 foregone every attempt to kiss Virginia, 
 and. yet apparently he was happiness 
 itself; and Paul took him aside, as soon 
 as the meal was over, to congratulate ' 
 him on the holy state to which exact' 
 thought had conducted him. ' You see,' 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 75 
 
 Paul said, 'what a natural growth the 
 loftiest morality is. Virginia doesn't' 
 want to be kissed by you. I should be 
 shocked at your doing so shocking a 
 thing as kissing her. If you kissed her, 
 you would make both of us miserable ; 
 and, as a necessary consequence, you 
 Would be in an agony likewise ; in addi- 
 tion to which, I should inevitably kick 
 you.' 
 
 'But,' said the curate, 'suppose I 
 kissed Virginia on the sly, — I merely put 
 this as an hypothesis, remember, — and 
 that in a little while she liked it, what 
 then ? She and I would both be happy, 
 and you ought to be happy too, because 
 we were.' 
 
76 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 ' Idiot ! ' said the Professor. ' Virginia 
 is another man's wife. Nobody really 
 likes kissing another man's wife ; nor do 
 wives ever like kissing any one except 
 their husbands. What they really like 
 is what Professor Huxley calls "the un- 
 defined but bright ideal of the highest 
 good," which, as he says, exact thought 
 shows us is the true end of existence. 
 But, pooh ! what is the use of all this 
 talking ? You know which way your 
 higher nature calls you ; and, of course, 
 unless men believe in God, they cannot 
 help obeying their higher nature.' 
 
 ' I,' said the curate, ' think the belief 
 in God a degrading superstition ; I think 
 every one an imbecile who believes a 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 77 
 
 miracle possible. And yet I do not 
 care two straws about the highest, good. 
 What you call my lower nature is^ far 
 the strongest : I mean to follow it to 
 the best of my ability ; and I prefer 
 calling it my higher, for the sake of the 
 associations.' 
 
 This plunged the Professor in deeper 
 grief than ever. He knew not what to 
 do. He paced up and down the ve- 
 randah, or about the rooms, and moaned 
 and groaned as if he had a violent 
 toothache. Virginia and the curate asked 
 what was amiss with him. ' I am 
 agonising,' he said, ' for the sake of holy, 
 solemn, unspeakably dignified Humanity.' 
 
 The curate, seeing the Professor thus 
 
78 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 dejected, by degrees took heart again ; 
 and as Virginia still continued her fasci- 
 nating behaviour to him, he resolved to 
 try and prove to her that, the test of 
 morality being happiness, the most moral 
 thing she could do would be to allow 
 him to kiss her. No sooner had he 
 begun to propound these views, than the 
 Professor gave over his groaning, seized 
 the curate by the collar, and dragged 
 him out of the room with a roughness 
 that nearly throttled him. 
 
 ' I was but propounding a theory — 
 an opinion,' gasped the curate. ' Surely 
 thought is free. You will not persecute 
 me for my opinions ? ' 
 
 ' It is not for your opinions,' said the 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 
 
 79 
 
 Professor, 'but for the horrible effect 
 they might have. Opinions,' he roared, 
 ' can only be tolerated which have no pos- 
 sible consequences. You may promulgate 
 any of those as much as you like ; be- 
 cause to do that would be a self-regarding 
 action.' 
 
CHAPTER XII. 
 
 ■ELL,' said the curate, 'if I 
 may not kiss Virginia, I will 
 drink brandy instead. That 
 will make me happy enough ; and then 
 we shall all be radiant.' 
 
 He soon put his resolve into practice. 
 He got a bottle of brandy, he sat him- 
 self down under a palm-tree, and told 
 the Professor he was going to make an 
 afternoon of it. 
 
THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 81 
 
 ' Foolish man ! ' said the Professor ; 
 ' I was never drunk myself, it is true ; 
 but I know that to get drunk makes 
 one's head ache horribly. To get drunk 
 is, therefore, horribly immoral ; and there- 
 fore I cannot permit it.' 
 
 ' Excuse me,' said the curate ; ' it is 
 a self-regarding action. Nobody's head 
 will ache but mine ; so that is my own 
 look-out. I have been expelled from 
 school, from college, and from my first 
 curacy for drinking. So I know well 
 enough the balance of pains and plea 
 sures.' 
 
 Here he pulled out his brandy bottle, 
 and applied his lips to it. 
 
82 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA 
 
 'Oh, Humanity!' he exclaimed, 'how 
 solemn this brandy tastes ! ' 
 
 Matters went on like this for several 
 days. The curate was too much fright 
 ened to again approach Virginia. Vir 
 ginia at last became convinced that he 
 did not care about kissing her. Her 
 vanity was wounded, and she became 
 sullen ; and this made the Professor 
 sullen also. In fact, two thirds of Hu- 
 manity were overcast with gloom. The 
 only happy section of it was the curate, 
 who alternately smoked and drank all 
 day long. 
 
 ' The nasty little beast ! ' said Virginia 
 to the Professor; 'he is nearly always 
 drunk. I am beginning quite to like 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 83 
 
 you, Paul, by comparison with him. Let 
 us turn him out, and not let him live in 
 the cottage.' 
 
 ' No,' said the Professor ; ' for he is 
 one third of Humanity. You do not 
 properly appreciate the solidarity of man- 
 kind. His existence, however, I admit 
 is a great difficulty.' 
 
 One day at dinner-time, shortly after- 
 wards, Paul came in radiant. 
 
 ' Oh holy, oh happy event ! ' he ex- 
 claimed ; ' all will go right at last.' 
 
 Virginia inquired anxiously what had 
 
 happened, and Paul informed her that 
 
 the curate, who had got more drunk 
 
 than usual that afternoon, had fallen 
 
 over a cliff, and been dashed to pieces. 
 g 2 
 
84 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 
 
 ' What event,' he asked, ' could be 
 more charming — more unspeakably holy ? 
 It bears about it every mark of sanctity. 
 It is for the greatest happiness of the 
 greatest number. Come,' he continued, 
 ' let you and me together, purged of sin, 
 and purged of sorrow as we are — let us 
 begin our love-feast. Let us each seek 
 the happiness of the other. Let us in 
 stantly be sublime and happy.' 
 
CHAPTER XIII. 
 
 HE supreme moment is come,' 
 said Paul solemnly, as they 
 sat down to dinner. ' Let us 
 prepare ourselves for realising to the full 
 the essential dignity of Humanity — that 
 grand itre, which has come, in the course 
 of progress, to consist of you and me. 
 Virginia, consider this. Every condition 
 of happiness that modern thinkers have 
 dreamed of is now fulfilled. We have 
 but to seek each the happiness of the 
 
86 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA ; 
 
 other, and we shall both be in a solemn, 
 a significant, and unspeakable state of 
 rapture. See, here is an exquisite leg 
 of mutton. I,' said Paul, who liked the 
 fat best, ' will give up all the fat to you.' 
 
 'And I,' said Virginia, resignedly, 
 ' will give up all the lean to you.' 
 
 A few mouthfuls made Virginia feel 
 sick. ' I confess,' said she, ' I can't get 
 on with this fat.' 
 
 ' I confess,' the Professor answered, 
 ' I don't exactly like this lean.' 
 
 ' Then let us,' said Virginia, ' be like 
 Jack Sprat and his wife.' 
 
 ' No,' said the Professor, meditatively, 
 1 that is quite inadmissible. For in that 
 case we should be egoistic hedonists. 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 87 
 
 However, for to-day it shall be as you 
 say. I will think of something better 
 to-morrow.' 
 
 Next day he and Virginia had >a 
 chicken apiece ; only Virginia's was put 
 before Paul, and Paul's before Virginia ; 
 and they each walked round the table 
 to supply each other with the slightest 
 necessaries. 
 
 ' Ah ! ' cried Paul, ' this is altruism 
 indeed. I think already I can feel the 
 sublimity beginning.' 
 
 Virginia liked this rather better. But 
 soon she committed the sin of taking for 
 herself the liver of Paul's chicken. As 
 soon as she had eaten the whole of it 
 her conscience began to smite her. She 
 
88 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 confessed her sin to Paul, and inquired, 
 with some anxiety, if he thought she 
 would go to hell for it. ' Metaphorically,' 
 said Paul, 'you have already done so. 
 You are punished by the loss of the 
 pleasure you would have had in giving 
 that liver to me, and also by your know- 
 ledge of my knowledge of your folly in 
 foregoing the pleasure.' 
 
 Virginia was much relieved by this 
 answer ; she at once took several more 
 of the Professor's choicest bits, and was 
 happy in the thought that her sins were 
 expiated in the very act of their com- 
 mission, by the latent pain she felt per- 
 suaded they were attended by. Feeling 
 that this was sufficient, she took care 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 89 
 
 not to add Paul's disapproval to her 
 punishment, so she never told him again. 
 
 For a short time this practice of altru- 
 ism seemed to Virginia to have many- 
 advantages. But though the Professor 
 was always exclaiming, ' How significant 
 is human life by the very nature of its 
 constitution ! ' she very soon found it a 
 trifle dull. Luckily, however, she hit 
 upon a new method of exercising mo 
 rality, and, as the Professor fully ad- 
 mitted, of giving it a yet more solemn 
 significance. 
 
 The Professor having by some acci- 
 dent lost his razors, his moustaches had 
 begun to grow profusely, and Virginia had 
 watched them with a deep but half-con- 
 
90 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 scious admiration. At last, in a happy 
 moment, she exclaimed, ' Oh, Paul, do 
 let me wax the ends for you.' Paul at 
 first giggled, blushed, and protested, but, 
 as Virginia assured him it would make 
 her happy, he consented. ' Then,' she 
 said, 'you will know that I am happy, 
 and that in return will make you happy 
 also. Ah ! ' she exclaimed when the 
 operation was over, ' do go and examine 
 yourself in the glass. I declare you look 
 exactly like Jack Barley — Barley-Sugar, 
 as we used to call him — of the Blues.' 
 
 Virginia smiled ; suddenly she blushed ; 
 the Professor blushed also. To cover 
 the' blushes she begged to be allowed 
 to do his hair. ' It will make me so 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 91 
 
 much happier, Paul,' she said. The 
 Professor again assented, that he might 
 make Virginia happy, and that she might 
 be happy in knowing that he was 
 happy in promoting her happiness. At 
 last the Professor, shy and awkward as 
 he was, was emboldened to offer to do 
 Virginia's hair in return. She allowed 
 him to arrange her fringe, and, as she 
 found he did no great harm to it, she let 
 him repeat the operation as often as he 
 liked. 
 
 A week thus passed, full, as the Pro- 
 fessor said, of infinite solemnity. ' I 
 admit, Paul,' sighed Virginia, ' that this 
 altruism, as you call it, is very touching. 
 I like it very much. But,' she added, 
 
92 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 
 
 sinking her voice to a whisper, ' are you 
 quite sure, Paul, that it is perfectly 
 moral ?' 
 
 ' Moral !' echoed the Professor, 'moral ! 
 Why, exact thought shows us that it 
 is the very essence of all morality ! ' 
 
~~%7 S7 ^7 f"~ 
 
 —*? — s? — ^ — v— 
 
 CHAPTER XIV. 
 
 >ATTERS now went on charm- 
 ingly. All existence seemed 
 to take a richer colouring, 
 and there was something, Paul said, 
 which, in Professor T yndall's words, 
 'gave fulness and tone to it, but 
 which he could neither analyse nor com- 
 prehend.' But at last a change came. 
 One morning, whilst Virginia was ar- 
 ranging Paul's moustaches, she was 
 frightened almost into a fit by a sudden 
 
94 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 apparition at the window. It was a 
 hideous hairy figure, perfectly naked 
 but for a band of silver which it wore 
 about its neck. For a moment it did 
 nothing but grin and stare ; then, utter- 
 ing a discordant scream, it flung into 
 Virginia's lap a filthy piece of carrion, 
 and in an instant it had bounded away 
 
 with an almost miraculous activity. 
 
 i 
 
 Virginia shrieked with disgust and 
 terror, and clung to Paul's knees for pro- 
 tection. He, however, in some strange 
 way, seemed unmoved and preoccupied. 
 All at once, to her intense surprise, 
 she saw his face light up with an ex- 
 pression of triumphant eagerness. 'The 
 missing link ! ' he exclaimed, ' the missing 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 95 
 
 link at last ! Thank God — I beg pardon 
 for my unspeakable blasphemy — I mean, 
 thank circumstances over which I have 
 no control. I must this instant go out 
 and hunt for it. Give me some pro- 
 visions in a knapsack, for I will not come 
 back till I have caught it.' 
 
 This was a fearful blow to Virginia. 
 She fell at Paul's feet weeping, and be- 
 sought him in piteous accents that he 
 would not thus abandon her. 
 
 ' I must,' said the Professor solemnly, 
 ' for I am going in pursuit of Truth. 
 To arrive at Truth is man's perfect and 
 most rapturous happiness. You must 
 surely know that, even if I have forgotten 
 to tell it to you. To pursue truth — holy 
 
96 THE NEW PAUL A AD VIRGINIA; 
 
 truth for holy truth's sake — is a more 
 solemn pleasure than even frizzling your 
 hair.' 
 
 ' Oh,' cried Virginia, hysterically, ' I 
 don't care two straws for truth. What on 
 earth is the good of it ? ' 
 
 ' It is its own end/ said the Professor. 
 ' It is its own exceeding great reward. 
 I must be off at once in search of it. 
 Good-bye for the present. Seek truth on 
 your own account, and be unspeakably 
 happy also, because you know that I am 
 seeking it' 
 
 The Professor remained away for three 
 days. For the first two of tbem Virginia 
 was inconsolable. She wandered about 
 mournfully with her head dejected. She 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 97 
 
 very often sighed ; she very often uttered 
 the name of Paul. At last she surprised 
 herself by exclaiming aloud to the irre- 
 sponsive solitude, ' Oh, Paul, until you 
 were gone, I never knew how passionately 
 I loved you.' No sooner were these 
 words out of her mouth than she stood- 
 still, horror-stricken. ' Alas ! ' she cried, 
 ' and have I really come to this ? I am 
 in a state of deadly sin, and there is no 
 priest here to confess to ! Alone, alone I 
 must conquer my forbidden love as I may. 
 But, ah me, what a guilty thing I am ! ' 
 
 As she uttered these words, her eyes 
 fell on a tin box of the Professor's, marked 
 ' Private,' which he always kept carefully 
 locked, and which had before now excited 
 
 H 
 
98 THE NEW FAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 her curiosity. Suddenly she became con- 
 scious of a new impulse. ' I will pursue 
 truth! 'she exclaimed. 'I will break 
 that box open, and I will see what is 
 inside it. Ah ! ' she added, as with the 
 aid of the poker she at last wrenched off 
 the padlock. 'Paul may be right, after 
 all. There is more interest , in the pur- 
 suit of truth than I thought there was.' 
 
 The box was full of papers, letters, 
 and diaries, the greater part of which 
 were marked 'Strictly private.' Seeing 
 this, Virginia's appetite for truth became 
 keener than ever. She instantly began 
 her researches. The more she read, 
 the more eager she became ; and the 
 more private appeared the nature of 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 99 
 
 the documents, the more insatiable did 
 her thirst for truth grow. To her ex- 
 treme surprise, she gathered that the 
 Professor had begun life as a clergy- 
 man. There were several photographs of 
 him in his surplice; and a number of 
 devout prayers, apparently composed by 
 himself for his own personal use. This 
 discovery was the result of her labours. 
 'Certainly,' she said, 'it is one of 
 extreme significance. If Paul was a 
 priest once, he must be a priest now. 
 Orders are indelible — at least in the 
 Church of England I know they are. 
 
 H 2 
 
CHAPTER XV. 
 
 >AUL came back, to Virginia's 
 extreme relief, without the 
 missing link. But he was 
 still radiant in spite of his failure ; for 
 he had discovered, he said, a place 
 where the creature had apparently slept, 
 and he had collected in a card-paper 
 box a large number of its parasites. 
 
 ' I am glad,' said Virginia, ' that you 
 have not found the missing link : though 
 as to thinking that we really came from 
 
THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 101 
 
 monkeys, of course that is too absurd. 
 Now if you could have brought me a 
 nice monkey, I should really have liked 
 that. The Bishop has promised that I 
 shall have a darling one, if I ever reach 
 him — ah me ! — if Paul,' continued Vir- 
 ginia, in a very solemn voice, after a 
 long pause, 'do you know that whilst 
 you have been away I have been pur- 
 suing truth ? I rather liked it ; and I 
 found it very, very significant' 
 
 ' Oh, joy ! ' exclaimed the Professor. 
 ' Oh, unspeakable radiance ! Oh, holy, 
 oh essentially dignified Humanity ! it will 
 very soon be perfect ! Tell me, Virginia, 
 what truths have you been discovering?' 
 
 ' One truth about you, Paul,' said 
 
102 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA ; 
 
 Virginia, very gravely, 'and one truth 
 about me. I burn — oh, I burn to tell 
 them to you ! ' 
 
 The Professor was enraptured to hear 
 that one half of Humanity had been 
 thus studying human nature ; and he 
 began asking Virginia if her discoveries 
 belonged to the domain of historical or 
 biological science. Meanwhile Virginia 
 had flung herself on her knees before 
 him, and was exclaiming, in piteous ac- 
 cents — 
 
 ' By my fault, by my own fault, by 
 my very grievous fault, holy father, I 
 confess to you ' 
 
 ' Is the woman mad ? ' cried the Pro- 
 fessor, starting up from his seat. 
 
OH, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 103 
 
 'You are a priest, Paul,' said Vir- 
 ginia; 'that is one of the things I have 
 discovered. I am in a state of deadly 
 sin ; that is the other : and I must and 
 will confess to you. Once a priest, al- 
 ways a priest. You cannot get rid of 
 your orders, and you must and shall 
 hear me.' 
 
 ' I was once in orders, it is true/ 
 said Paul, reluctantly ; ' but how did you 
 find out my miserable secret ? ' 
 
 ' In my zeal for truth,' said Virginia, 
 ' I broke open your tin box ; I read all 
 your letters; I looked at your early 
 photographs ; I saw all your beautiful 
 prayers.' 
 
 'You broke open my box!' cried 
 
104 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA, 
 
 the Professor. ' You read my letters and 
 my private papers ! Oh, horrible ! oh, 
 immoral ! What shall we do if one half 
 of Humanity has no feeling of honour ? 
 ' Oh ! ' said Virginia, ' it was all for 
 the love of truth — of solemn and holy 
 truth. I sacrificed every other feeling 
 for that. But I have not told you my 
 truth yet; and I. am determined you 
 shall hear it, or I must still remain in 
 my sins. Paul, I am a married woman ; 
 and I discover, in spite of that, that I 
 have fallen in love with you. My hus- 
 band, it is true, is far away ; and what- 
 ever we do, he could never possibly be 
 the wiser. But I am in a state of 
 mortal sin, nevertheless ; and I would 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 105 
 
 give anything in the world if you would 
 only kiss me.' 
 
 'Woman!' exclaimed Paul, aghast 
 with fright and horror, 'do you dare to 
 abuse truth, by turning it to such base 
 purposes ? ' 
 
 ' Oh, you -are so clever,' Virginia 
 went on, ' and when the ends of your 
 moustaches are waxed, you look posi- 
 tively handsome ; and I love you so 
 deeply and so tenderly, that I shall 
 certainly go to hell if you do not give 
 me absolution.' 
 
 At this the Professor jumped up, 
 and, staring very hard at Virginia, asked 
 her if, after all that he had said on the 
 ship, she really believed in such ex- 
 
io6 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 ploded fallacies as hell, God, and priest- 
 craft. 
 
 She reminded him that he had 
 preached there without a surplice, and 
 that she had therefore not thought it 
 right to listen to a word he said. 
 
 ' Ah ! ' cried the Professor, with a 
 sigh of intense relief, ' I see it all now. 
 How can Humanity ever be unspeak- 
 ably holy so long as one half of it 
 grovels in dreams of an unspeakably 
 holy God ? As Mr. Frederic Harrison 
 truly says, a want of faith in "the es- 
 sential dignity of man is one of the 
 surest marks of the enervating influence 
 of this dream of a celestial glory.'" 
 The Professor accordingly re-delivered 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 107 
 
 to Virginia the entire substance of his 
 lectures in the ship. He fully impressed 
 on her that all the intellect of the world 
 was on the side of Humanity; and that 
 God's existence could be disproved with 
 a box of chemicals. He was agreeably 
 surprised at finding her not at all un- 
 willing to be convinced, and extremely 
 unexacting in her demands for proof. 
 In a few days she had not a remnant 
 of superstition left. ' At last ! ' exclaimed 
 the Professor; 'it has come at last! 
 Unspeakable happiness will surely be- 
 gin now.' 
 
CHAPTER XVI. 
 
 bO one now could possibly be 
 more emancipated than Virgi- 
 nia. She tittered all day long 
 and whenever the Professor asked her 
 why, she always told him she was think- 
 ing of ' an intelligent First Cause,' a 
 conception which she said 'was really 
 quite killing.' But when her first burst 
 of intellectual excitement was over, she 
 became more serious. ' All thought, Paul,' 
 she said, ' is valuable mainly because it 
 
THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 109 
 
 leads to action. Come, my love, my 
 dove, my beauty, and let us kiss each 
 other all daylong. Let us enjoy the 
 charming license which exact thought 
 shows us we shall never be punished for.' 
 This was a result of freedom that 
 the Professor had never bargained for. 
 He could not understand it, ' because,' 
 he argued, ' if people were to reason in 
 that way, morality would at once cease 
 to be possible.' But he had seen so 
 much of the world lately, that he soon 
 recovered himself, and recollecting that 
 immorality was only ignorance, he began 
 to show Virginia where her error lay — 
 her one remaining error. ' I perceive,' 
 he said, 'that you are ignorant of one 
 
no THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 of the greatest triumphs of exact thought 
 — the distinction it has established be- 
 tween the lower and the higher pleasures. 
 Philosophers, who have thought the whole 
 thing over in their studies, have become 
 sure that as soon as the latter are 
 presented to men they will at once leave 
 all and follow them.' 
 
 ' They must be very nice pleasures,' 
 said Virginia, ' if they would make me 
 leave kissing you for the sake of them.' 
 
 ' They are nice,' said the Professor. 
 ' They are the pleasures of the imagina- 
 tion, the intellect, and the glorious ap- 
 prehension of truth. Compared with 
 these, kissing me would be quite insipid. 
 Remain here for a moment, whilst I go 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. in 
 
 to fetch something, and you shall then 
 begin to taste them.' 
 
 In a few moments Paul came back 
 again, and. found Virginia in a state of 
 intense expectancy. 
 
 'Now — ,'. he exclaimed triumphantly. 
 ,,,-j'Now — ,' exclaimed Virginia, with a 
 beating heart. 
 
 ■ ;., The , Professor put his hand in his 
 pocket, and drew slowly forth from it 
 an object which Virginia knew well. 
 It reminded her of the most innocent 
 period of her life ; but she hated the 
 very sight of it none the less. It was 
 a Colenso's Arithmetic. 
 
 ' Come,' said the Professor, ' no 
 truths are so pure and necessary as 
 
H2 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 those of mathematics ; you shall at once 
 begin the glorious apprehension of them.' 
 
 ' Oh, Paul,' cried Virginia, in an 
 agony, 'but I really don't care for truth 
 at all ; and you know that when I broke 
 your tin box open and read your private 
 letters in my search for it, you were 
 very angry with me.' 
 
 ' Ah ! ' said Paul, holding up his finger, 
 'but those were not necessary truths. 
 Truths about human action and character 
 are not necessary truths ; therefore men 
 of science care nothing about them, 
 and they have no place in scientific sys- 
 tems of ethics. Pure truths are of a 
 very different character; and, however 
 much you may misunderstand your own 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 113 
 
 inclinations, you can really care for nothing 
 so much as doing a few sums. I will 
 set you some very easy ones to begin 
 with, and you shall do them by yourself, 
 whilst I magnify in the next room the 
 parasites of the missing link.' 
 
 Virginia saw that there 'was no help 
 for it. She did her sums by herself the 
 whole morning, which, as at school she 
 had been very good at arithmetic, was 
 not a hard task for her, and Paul mag- 
 nified parasites in the next room, and 
 prepared slides for his microscope. 
 
 When they met again, Paul began 
 skipping and dancing, as if he had gone 
 quite out of his senses, and every now 
 and then between the skips he gave a 
 
ii4 THE ttEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 sepulchral groan. Virginia asked him in 
 astonishment what on earth was the matter 
 with him. 
 
 « Matter ! ' he exclaimed. ' Why, Hu- 
 manity is at last perfect ! All the evils of 
 existence are removed ; we neither of us 
 believe in a God or a celestial future ; and 
 we are both in full enjoyment of the 
 higher pleasures and the apprehension of 
 scientific truth. And therefore I skip 
 because Humanity is so unspeakably 
 happy, and I groan because, it is so un- 
 speakably solemn.' 
 
 ' Alas ! alas ! ' cried Virginia, ' and 
 would not you like to kiss me ? ' 
 
 ' No,' said the Professor, sternly ; ' and 
 you would not like me to kiss you. It 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 115 
 
 is impossible that one half of Humanity 
 should prefer the pleasure of unlawful 
 love to the pleasure of finding out 
 scientific truths.' 
 
 ' But,' pleaded Virginia, ' cannot we 
 enjoy both ? ' 
 
 ' No,' said the Professor, ' for if I 
 began to kiss you I should soon not care 
 two straws about the parasites of the 
 missing link.' 
 
 ' Well,' said Virginia, ' it is nice of 
 
 you to say that; but still :Ah me! 
 
 Ah me!' 
 
 And her bosom heaved slowly with 
 a soft, long sigh. 
 
 1 2 
 
CHAPTER XVII. 
 
 [IRGINIA was preparing, with 
 a rueful face, to resume her 
 enjoyment of the higher plea- 
 sures, when a horrible smell, like that of 
 an open drain, was suddenly blown 
 in through the window. 
 
 Virginia stopped her nose with her 
 handkerchief. The Professor's conduct 
 was very different. 
 
 'Oh, rapture!' he cried, jumping up 
 
THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 117 
 
 from his seat, ' I smell the missing link.' 
 And in another instant he was gone. 
 
 'Well,' said Virginia, 'here is one 
 comfort. Whilst Paul is away I shall 
 be relieved from the higher pleasures. 
 Alas ! ' she cried, as she flung herself 
 down on the sofa, ' he is so nice-looking, 
 and such an enlightened thinker. But it 
 is plain he has never loved, or else very 
 certainly he would love again.' 
 
 Paul returned in about a couple of 
 hours, again unsuccessful in his search. 
 
 * Ah ! ' cried Virginia, 'I am so glad 
 you have not caught the creature ! ' 
 
 ' Glad ! ' echoed the Professor, ' glad ! 
 Do you know that till I have caught the 
 missing link the cause of glorious truth 
 
n8 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 will suffer grievously ? The missing link 
 is the token of the solemn fact of our 
 origin from inorganic matter. I did but 
 catch one blessed glimpse of him. He 
 had certainly a silver band about his 
 neck. He was about three feet high. 
 He was rolling in a lump of carrion. 
 It is through him that we are related 
 to the stars — the holy, the glorious stars, 
 about which we know so little.' 
 
 ' Bother the stars ! ' said Virginia ; ' I 
 couldn't bear, Paul, that anything should 
 come between you and me. I have 
 been thinking of you and longing for 
 you the whole time you have been 
 away.' 
 
 ' What ! ' cried Paul, ' and how have 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 119 
 
 you been able to forego the pleasures of 
 the intellect ?' 
 
 ' I have deserted them,' cried Vir- 
 ginia, 'for the pleasures of the imagina- 
 tion, which I gathered from you were 
 also very ennobling. And I found they 
 were so ; for I have been imagining that 
 you loved me. Why is the reality 
 less ennobling than the imagination ? 
 Paul, you shall love me ; I will force 
 you to love me. It will make us both 
 so happy : we shall never go to hell , 
 for it ; and it cannot possibly cause the 
 slightest scandal.' 
 
 The Professor was more bewildered 
 than ever by these appeals. He won- 
 dered how Humanity would ever get on 
 
120 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 if one half of it cared nothing for pure 
 truth, and persisted in following the 
 vulgar impulses that had been the most 
 distinguishing feature of its benighted 
 past — that is to say, those ages of its 
 existence of which any record has been 
 preserved for us. Luckily, however, Vir- 
 ginia came to his assistance. 
 
 ' I think I know, Paul,' she said, 
 ' why I do not care as I should do for 
 the intellectual pleasures. We have both 
 been seeking them by ourselves ; and we 
 have been therefore egoistic hedonists. 
 It is quite true, as you say, that selfish- 
 ness is a despicable thing. Let me,' she 
 went on, sitting down beside him, 'look 
 through your microscope along with you. > 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 121 
 
 I think perhaps, if we shared the pleasure, 
 the missing link's parasites might have 
 some interest for me.' 
 
 The Professor was overjoyed at this 
 proposal. The two sat down side by 
 side, and tried their best to look simul- 
 taneously through the eye-piece of the 
 microscope. Virginia in a moment ex- 
 pressed herself much satisfied. It is true 
 they saw nothing ; but their cheeks 
 touched. The Professor too seemed con- 
 tented, and said they should both be 
 in a state of rapture when they had got 
 the right focus. At last Virginia whis- 
 pered, with a soft smile — 
 
 ' Suppose we put that nasty micro- 
 scope aside ; it is only in the way. And 
 
122 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 
 
 then, oh, Paul ; dear love, dove of a 
 Paul ! we can kiss each other to our 
 heart's content' 
 
 Paul thought Virginia quite incor 
 rigible, and rushed headlong out of the 
 room. 
 
CHAPTER XVIII. 
 
 [LAS!' cried Paul, 'what can 
 be done to convince one half 
 of Humanity that it is really- 
 devoted to the higher pleasures and does 
 not care for the lower — at least nothing 
 to speak of ? ' The poor man was in a 
 state of dreadful perplexity, and felt well- 
 nigh distracted. At last a light broke in 
 on him. He remembered that as one 
 of his most revered masters, Professor 
 Tyndall, had admitted, a great part of 
 
124 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 Humanity would always need a religion, 
 and that Virginia now had none. He 
 at once rushed back to her. ' Ah ! ' he 
 exclaimed, 'all is explained now. You 
 cannot be in love with me, for that 
 would be unlawful passion. Unlawful 
 passion is unreasonable, and unreason- 
 able passion would quite upset a system 
 of pure reason, which is what exact 
 thought shows us is soon going to 
 govern the world. No ! the emotions 
 that you fancy are directed to me are 
 in reality cosmic emotion — in other words, 
 are the reasonable religion of the future. 
 I must now initiate you in its solemn 
 and unspeakably significant worship.' 
 
 ' Religion ! ' exclaimed Virginia, not 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 125 ' 
 
 knowing whether to laugh or cry. ' It 
 is not kind of you to be making fun of 
 me. There is no God, no soul, and no 
 supernatural order, and above all there 
 is no hell. How then can you talk to 
 me about religion ? ' 
 
 ' You,' replied Paul, ' are associating 
 religion with theology, as indeed the 
 world hitherto always has done. But 
 those two things, as Professor Huxley 
 well observes, have absolutely nothing 
 to do with each other. "It may be," 
 says that great teacher, " that the object 
 of a man's religion is an ideal of sensual 
 enjoyment, or 
 
 ' Ah ! ' cried Virginia, ' that is my re- 
 ligion, Paul.' 
 
126 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 'Nonsense!' replied Paul; 'that can- 
 not be the religion of half Humanity, 
 else high, holy, solemn, awful morality 
 would never be able to stand on its own 
 basis. See, the night has fallen, the 
 glorious moon has arisen, the stupendous 
 stars are sparkling in the firmament. 
 Come down with me to the sea-shore, 
 where we may be face to face with 
 nature, and I will show you then what 
 true religion — what true worship is.' 
 
 The two went out together. They 
 stood on the smooth sands, which glittered 
 white and silvery in the dazzling moon- 
 light. All was hushed. The gentle" 
 murmur of the trees, and the soft splash 
 of the sea, seemed only to make the 
 
OH, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 127 
 
 silence audible. The Professor paused 
 close beside Virginia, and took her hand. 
 Virginia liked that, and thought that 
 religion without theology was , not per- 
 haps so bad after all. Meanwhile Paul 
 had fixed his eyes on the moon. Then, 
 in a voice almost broken with emotion, 
 he whispered, ' The prayer of the man 
 of science, it has been said, must be for 
 ' the most part of the silent sort. He 
 who said that was wrong. It need not 
 be silent ; it need only be inarticulate. 
 I have discovered an audible and a 
 reasonable liturgy which will give utter- 
 ance to the full to the religion of exact 
 thought. Let us both join our voices, 
 and let us croon at the moon.' 
 
128 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA ; 
 
 The Professor at once began a long', 
 low howling. Virginia joined him, until 
 she was out of breath. 
 
 ' Oh, Paul,' she said at last, ' is this 
 more rational than the Lord's Prayer ? ' 
 
 ' Yes,' said the Professor, ' for we can 
 analyse and comprehend that ; but true 
 religious feeling, as Professor Tyndall 
 tells us, we can neither analyse nor 
 comprehend. See how big nature is, 
 and how little — ah, how little ! — we know 
 about it. Is it not solemn, and sublime, 
 and awful ? Come let us howl again.' 
 
 The Professor's devotional fervour 
 grew every moment. At last he put 
 his hand to his mouth, and began hoot- 
 ing like an owl, till it seemed that all 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 129 
 
 the island echoed to him. The louder 
 Paul hooted and howled, the more near 
 did he draw to Virginia. 
 
 ' Ah ! ' he said, as he put his arm 
 about her waist, 'it is in solemn mo- 
 ments like this that the solidarity of 
 mankind becomes apparent.' 
 
 Virginia, during the last few mo- 
 ments, had stuck her fingers in her ears. 
 She now took them out, and, throwing 
 her arms round Paul's neck, tried, with 
 her cheek on his shoulder, to make 
 another little hoot ; but the sound her 
 lips formed was much more like a kiss. 
 The power of religion was at last too 
 much for Paul. 
 
 'For the sake of cosmic emotion,' 
 K • 
 
130 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA; 
 
 he exclaimed, ' O other half of Hu- 
 manity, and for the sake of rational 
 religion, both of which are showing them- 
 selves under quite a new light to me, I 
 will kiss you.' 
 
 The Professor was bending down 
 his face over her, when, as if by magic, 
 he started, stopped, and remained as 
 one petrified. Amidst the sharp silence, 
 there rang a human shout from the 
 rocks. 
 
 ' Oh ! ' shrieked Virginia, falling on 
 her knees, 'it is a miracle ! it is a 
 miracle ! And I know— merciful heavens 
 — I know the meaning of it. God is 
 angry with us for pretending that we do 
 not believe on Him.' 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 131 
 
 The Professor was as white as a 
 sheet; but he struggled with his per- 
 turbation manfully. 
 
 ' It is not a miracle,' he cried, ' but 
 an hallucination. It is an axiom with 
 exact thinkers that all proofs of the 
 miraculous are hallucinations.' 
 
 'See,' shrieked Virginia again, 'they 
 are coming, they are coming. Do not 
 you see them ? ' 
 
 Paul looked, and there sure enough, 
 were two figures, a male and a female, 
 advancing slowly towards -them, across 
 the moonlit sand. 
 
 ' It is nothing,' cried Paul ; ' it can- 
 not possibly be anything, I protest, in 
 
 K 2 
 
132 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 
 
 the name of science, that it is an optical 
 ■delusion.' 
 
 Suddenly the female figure exclaimed, 
 ' Thank God, it is he ! ' 
 
 In another moment the male figure 
 ■exclaimed, ' Thank God, it is she ! ' 
 
 ' My husband ! ' gasped Virginia. 
 
 ' My wife ! ' replied the bishop, for 
 it was none other than he. ' Welcome 
 to Chasuble Island. By the blessing of 
 God it is on your own home you have 
 been wrecked, and you have been liv- 
 ing in the very house that I had 
 intended to prepare for you. Providen- 
 tially, too, Professor Darnley's wife has 
 called here, in her search for her hus- 
 band, who has overstayed his time. 
 
OR, POSITIVISM ON AN ISLAND. 133, 
 
 See, my love, my dove, my beauty, 
 here is the monkey I promised you as 
 a pet, which broke loose a few days 
 ago, and which I was in the act of 
 looking for when your joint cries at- 
 tracted us, and we found you.' 
 
 A yell of delight here broke from 
 the Professor. The eyes of the others 
 were turned on him, and he was seen 
 embracing wildly a monkey which the 
 bishop led by a chain. ' The missing 
 link ! ' he exclaimed, ' the missing 
 link!' 
 
 'Nonsense !' cried the sharp tones of 
 a lady with a green gown and grey 
 corkscrew curls., 'It is nothing but a 
 monkey that the good bishop has been 
 
134 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 
 
 trying to tame for his wife. Don't you 
 see her name engraved on the collar ? ' 
 
 The shrill accents acted like a charm 
 upon Paul. He sprang away from the 
 creature that he had been just caressing. 
 He gazed for a moment on Virginia's 
 lovely form, her exquisite toilette, and 
 her melting eyes. Then he turned 
 wildly to the green gown and the grey 
 corkscrew curls. Sorrow and super- 
 stition, he felt, were again invading 
 Humanity. ' Alas ! ' he exclaimed at 
 last, ' I do now indeed believe in hell.' 
 
 'And I,' cried Virginia; with much 
 greater tact, and rushing into the arms 
 of her bishop, 'once more believe in 
 heaven.' 
 
NOTES. 
 
 ' We now find it (the earth) not only swathed by an 
 atmosphere, and covered by a sea, but also crowded 
 with living things. The question is, how were they 
 introduced? . . . The conclusion of science would 
 undoubtedly be, that the molten earth contained 
 within it elements of life, which grouped themselves 
 into their present forms as the planet cooled., The 
 difficulty and reluctance encountered by this concep- 
 tion arise solely from the fact that the theologic con- 
 ception obtained a prior footing in the human mind. 
 . . . Were not man's origin implicated, we should 
 accept without a murmur the derivation of animal and 
 vegetable life from what we call inorganic nature. 
 The conclusion of pure intellect points this way, and 
 no other.' Professor Tyndall. 
 
 ' Is this egg (from which the human being springs) 
 matter ? I hold it to be so, as much as the seed of a 
 
136 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 
 
 fern or of an oak. Nine months go to the making of 
 it into a man. Are the additions made during this 
 period of gestation drawn from matter ? I think so, 
 undoubtedly. If there be anything besides matter in, 
 the egg, or in the infant subsequently slumbering in 
 the womb, what is it ? ' Professor Tyndall. 
 
 ' Matter I define as the mysterious thing by which 
 all this is accomplished.' Professor Tyndall. 
 
 ' I do not think that the materialist is entitled to 
 say that his molecular groupings and motions explain 
 everything. In reality, they explain nothing.' 
 
 Professor Tyndall. 
 
 'Who shall exaggerate the deadly influence on 
 personal morality of those theologies which have re- 
 presented the Deity ... as a sort of pedantic drill- 
 sergeant of mankind, to whom no valour, no long- 
 tried loyalty, could atone for the misplacement of a 
 button of the uniform, or the misunderstanding of a 
 paragraph of the " regulations and instructions " ? ' 
 
 Professor Huxley. 
 
NOTES. 137 
 
 1 (To the Jesuit imagination} God is obviously a 
 large individual, who holds the leading-strings of the 
 universe, and orders its steps from a position outside 
 it all. . . ._ According to it (this notion) the Power 
 whom Goethe does not dare to name, and whom 
 Gassendi and Clark Maxwell present to us under the 
 guise of a manufacturer of atoms, turns out annually, 
 for England and Wales alone, a quarter of a million 
 of new souls. Taken in connection with the dictum 
 of Mr. Carlyle, that this annual increment to our 
 population are " mostly fools," but little profit to the 
 human heart seems derivable from this mode of re- 
 garding the divine operations. ... In the presence 
 of this mystery (the mystery of life) the . notion of an 
 atomic manufacturer and artificer of souls, raises the 
 doubt whether those who entertain it were ever 
 really penetrated by the solemnity of the problem for 
 which they offer such a solution.' 
 
 Processor Tyndall. 
 
 ' I look forward, however, to a time when the 
 strength, insight, and elevation which now visit us in 
 mere hints and glimpses, during moments of clear- 
 ness and vigour, shall be the stable and permanent 
 
138 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 
 
 possession of purer and mightier minds than ours — 
 purer and mightier, partly because of their deeper 
 knowledge of matter, and their more faithful con- 
 formity to its laws.' Professor Tyndall. 
 
 ' The world,, as it is, is growing daily dimmer be- 
 fore my eyes. The world, as it is to be, is ever grow- 
 ing brighter.' Harriet Martineau. 
 
 '. . . When you and I, like streaks of morning 
 cloud, shall have melted into the infinite azure of the 
 past' Professor Tyndall. 
 
 ' We, too, turn our thoughts to that which is be- 
 hind the veil. We strive to pierce its secret with eyes, 
 we trust, as eager and as fearless, and even, it may 
 be, more patient in searching for realities behind the 
 gloom. That which shall come after is no less 
 solemn to us than to you.' 
 
 Mr. Frederic Harrison. 
 
 ' Theological hypotheses of a new and hetero- 
 geneous existence have deadened our interest in the 
 realities, the grandeur, and the perpetuity of an 
 earthly life.' Mr. Frederic Harrison. 
 
NOTES. 139 
 
 'As we read the calm and humane words of 
 Condorcet, on the very edge of his yawning grave, we 
 learn, from the conviction of posthumous activity (not 
 posthumous fame), how the consciousness of a living 
 incorporation with the glorious future of his race, can 
 give a patience and happiness equal to that of any 
 martyr of theology. . . . Once make it {i.e. "this 
 sense of posthumous participation in the life of our 
 fellows") the baste of philosophy, the standard of 
 right and wrong, and the centre of a religion, and this 
 {the conversion of the masses) will prove, perhaps, an 
 easier task than that of teaching Greeks and Romans, 
 Syrians and Moors, to look forward to a life of ceaseless 
 psalmody in an immaterial heaven.' 
 
 Mr. Frederic Harrison. 
 
 . 'We make the future life, in the truest sense, 
 social, inasmuch as our future is simply an active 
 existence prolonged by society ; and our future life 
 rests not in any vague yearning, of which we have as 
 little evidence as we have definite conception : it 
 rests on a perfectly certain truth . . . that the actions, 
 feelings, thoughts, of each one of us, do marvellously 
 influence and mould each other. . . . Can we con- 
 
i4o THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA: 
 
 ceive a more potent stimulus to rectitude, to daily 
 and hourly striving after a true life, than this ever- 
 present sense that we are indeed immortal ; not that 
 we have an immortal something within us — but that 
 in very truth we ourselves, our thinking, feeling, act- 
 ing personalities, are immortal ? ' 
 
 Mr. Frederic Harrison. 
 
 ' As we live for others in life, so we live in others 
 after death. . . . How deeply does such a belief as 
 this bring home to each moment of life the mysterious 
 perpetuity of ourselves ! For good, for evil, we cannot 
 die. We cannot shake ourselves free from this eternity 
 of our faculties.' Mr. Frederic Harrison. 
 
 'We cannot even say that we shall continue to 
 .love ; but we know that we shall be loved.' 
 
 Mr. Frederic Harrison. 
 
 ' It is only when an earthly future is the fulfilment 
 of a worthy earthly life, that we can see the majesty, as 
 well as the glory, of the world beyond the grave ; and 
 then only will it fulfil its moral and religious purpose 
 as the great guide of human conduct.' 
 
 Mr. Frederic Harrison. 
 
NOTES. 141 
 
 ' I am confident that a brighter day is coming for 
 future generations.' Harriet Martineau. 
 
 ' The humblest life that ever turned a sod sends a 
 wave — no, more than a wave, a life — through the ever- 
 growing harmony of human society.' 
 
 Mr. Frederic Harrison. 
 
 ' Not a single nature, in its entirety, but leaves its 
 influence for good or for evil. As a fact, the good 
 prevail.' Mr. Frederic Harrison. 
 
 ' To our friends and loved ones we shall give the 
 most worthy honour and tribute if we never say nor 
 remember that they are dead, but, contrariwise, that 
 they have lived ; that hereby the brotherly force and 
 flow of their action and work may be carried over 
 the gulf of death, and made immortal in the true 
 and healthy life which they worthily had and used.' 
 
 Professor Clifford. . 
 
 ' It cannot be doubted that the " spiritual body " 
 of this book {The Unseen Universe) will be used to 
 support a belief that the dead are subject either to 
 
142 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 
 
 the shame and suffering of a Christian Heaven and 
 Hell, or to the degrading service of a modern witch. 
 From each of these unspeakable profanities let us hope 
 and endeavour that the memories of great and worthy- 
 men may be finally relieved.' Professor Clifford. 
 
 ' I choose the noble part of Emerson, when, after 
 various disenchantments, he exclaimed, "I covet 
 truth.'' The gladness of true heroism visits the heart 
 of him who is really competent to say this.' 
 
 Professor Tyndall. 
 
 ' The highest, as it is the only, content is to be 
 attained, not by grovelling in the rank and steaming 
 valleys of sense, but by continually striving towards 
 those high peaks, when, resting in eternal calm, 
 reason discerns the undefined but bright ideal of the 
 highest good — " a cloud by day, a pillar of fire by 
 night.'" Professor Huxley. 
 
 ' If it can be shown by observation and experi- 
 ment, that theft, murder, and adultery, do not tend to 
 diminish the happiness of society, then, in the absence 
 of any but natural knowledge, they are not social 
 immoralities.' Professor Huxley. 
 
NOTES. 
 
 143 
 
 'For my own part, I do not for one moment 
 admit that morality is not strong enough to hold its 
 own.' Professor Huxley. 
 
 'I object to the very general use of the terms 
 religion and theology, as if they were synonymous, or 
 indeed had anything whatever to do with one another. 
 . . . Religion is an affair of the affections. It may 
 be that the object of a man's religion — the ideal 
 which he worships — is an ideal of sensual enjoyment.' 
 
 Professor Huxley. 
 
 ' In his hour of health . . . when the pause of 
 reflection has set in, the scientific investigator finds 
 himself overshadowed with the same awe. It associ- 
 ates him with a power which gives fulness and tone to 
 his existence, but which he can neither analyse nor 
 comprehend.' Professor Tyndall. 
 
 ' He will see what drivellers even men of strenuous 
 intellects may become, though exclusively dwelling 
 and dealing with theological chimeras.' 
 
 Professor Tyndall. 
 
144 THE NEW PAUL AND VIRGINIA. 
 
 ' The two kinds of cosmic emotion run together 
 and become one. The microcosm is viewed only 
 in relation to human action ; nature is presented to 
 the emotions as the guide and teacher of humanity. 
 And the microcosm is viewed only as tending to com- 
 plete correspondence with the external ; human con- , 
 duct is subject for reverence only in so far as it is 
 consonant to the demiurgic law, in harmony with the 
 teaching of divine Nature.' Professor Clifford. 
 
 ' The world will have religion of some kind, even 
 though it should fly for it to the intellectual whoredom 
 of " spiritualism." ' Professor Tyndall. 
 
 ' All positive methods of treating man, of a com- 
 prehensive kind, adopt to the full all that has ever 
 .been said about the dignity of man's moral and 
 spiritual life. ... I do not confine my language to 
 the philosophy or religion of Comte ; for the same 
 conception of man is common to many philosophies 
 and many religions.' Mr. Frederic Harrison. 
 
Cornell University Library 
 PR 4972.M5N4 1878 
 
 The new Paul and Virginia; or, Positivism 
 
 3 1924 013 521 079 
 
 
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