) 3 
 
CORNELL 
 
 UNIVERSITY 
 
 LIBRARY 
 
Cornell University Library 
 BX8641.S82 T2 1875 
 
 Tell It all" 
 
 the story of a life's ex 
 
 olin 
 
 3 1924 029 474 925 
 
The original of tliis book is in 
 tine Cornell University Library. 
 
 There are no known copyright restrictions in 
 the United States on the use of the text. 
 
 http://www.archive.org/details/cu31924029474925 
 
ing'^'bj- Geo E Perine.lTewlLork: 
 
ii 
 
 Tell It All": 
 
 THE STORY OF A LIFE'S EXl^ERIENCE 
 
 IN 
 
 MORMONISM. 
 
 BY 
 
 Mrs. T. B. H. STENHOUSE, 
 
 OF SALT LAKE CITY, 
 FOR MOKE THAK TWENTY YEARS THE WIFE OF A MORMON MISSIONARY AND ELDER. 
 
 With Introductory Preface by Mrs. Harriet Beecher Stowe. 
 Full-page Illustrations, and steel-plate Portrait of the Author. 
 
 [PUBLISHED BY SUBSCRIPTION OKLY.] 
 
 HARTFORD, CONN.: 
 
 A. D. WORTHINGTO,N & Co., PUBLISHERS. 
 
 Queen City Publishing Co., Cincinnati. Excelsior Pubushing Co., St. Louis. 
 
 Louis Lloyd & Co., Chicago. A. L. Bancrofts Co., San Fkanqsco. 
 
 1875. 
 
IMl rights of translation reserved^ 
 
 Entered according to Act of Congress, in the year 1874, 
 
 By a. D. WORTHINGTON & CO., 
 
 Ib the Office of the Librarian of Congress, at Washington, p. C. 
 
 X 
 
 [Entered also at Stationers Hall, London, Eng.] 
 
TO 
 
 MY CHILDREN; 
 
 WITH 
 
 ALL A MOTHER'S LOVE AND TENDERNESS, 
 THIS VOLUME, 
 
 THH 
 
 STORY OF MY LIFE'S EXPERIENCE, 
 
 IS 
 
 AFFECTIONATELY INSCRIBED. 
 
CHAS. SPIEGLE, of New York. 
 
 3. 
 4- 
 S- 
 6. 
 7- 
 8. 
 9- 
 
 lO. 
 
 STEEL-PLATE PORTRAIT OF THE AUTHOR, - - Frmiisjiiece. 
 
 STEEL-PLATE PORTRAIT OF BRIGHAM YOUNG, - - . To face, 265 
 
 PILLARS OF THE MORMON CHURCH 63 
 
 GEORGE A. SMITH, THE NEW TRUSTEE-IN-TRUST, ... 63 
 
 "YOUNG BRIGGY," THE PROBABLE SUCCESSOR OF THE PROPHET, 63 
 
 " PRESIDENT" DANIEL H. WELLS, MAYOR OF SALT LAKE CITY, - 63 
 
 THE APOSTLE ORSON PRATT, " THE CHAMPION OF POLYGAMY," 63 
 
 ATTACKING THE SHOEMAKER, 114 
 
 TOO TRUE! - 134 
 
 MOCKED WITH WORDS, T - . ,83 
 
 "GATHERING TO ZION"— LIFE BY THE WAY, 214 
 
 OVER AT LAST " .225 
 
 VIEW OF MAIN STREET, SALT LAKE CITY, [From a Photograph], - 249 
 
 THE LADIES' SIDE OF MORMONISM 284 
 
 AMELIA FOLSOM YOUNG, BRIGHAM' S FAVORITE WIFE, - - 284 
 
 "ANN-ELIZA," BRIGHAM'S NINETEENTH WIFE 284 
 
 MISS ELIZA R. SNOW, MORMON POETESS AND HIGH PRIESTESS, 284 
 
 MRS. JOHN W. YOUNG, WIFE OF BRIGHAM'S APOSTATE SON, . 284 
 
 BROTHER BRIGHAM'S LAST BABY, - - 84 
 
 SCENE OF THE MOUNTAIN MEADOWS' MASSACRE, . . . 335 
 
 MY TALKATIVE FRIEND, ^,3 
 
 THE CRISIS OF A LIFE— ENTERING INTO POLYGAMY, - - - 455 
 
 PUTTING HIMSELF IN HER PLACE, „, 
 
 ' 473 
 
 "CHURCH" STORE— i(f:^5T BE. RIGHT! ^^ 
 
 POLYGAMY IN LOW LIFE— THE POOR MAN'S FAMILY, ... 515 
 
 POLYGAMY IN HIGH LIF0-THE PROPHErS MANSION, - - . 515 
 
 DESPAIR! jjj 
 
 FAC-SIMILE OF A MORMON " BILL OF DIVORCE," . » . , jj^ 
 
 LIGHT AT EVENTIDE, ^ 
 
PUBLISHERS' NOTICE. 
 
 By the merest^accident, a few months ago, in New York 
 City, the Publishers became personally acquainted with Mr. 
 T. B. H. Stenhouse, of Salt Lake City, the husband of the 
 Author of the present volume, and before they separated, 
 preliminary steps were taken for its publication. 
 
 Almost a year before that time, Mrs. Harriet Beecher 
 Stowe, the talented author of " Uncle Tom's Cabin," had 
 addressed a kind note to Mrs. Stenhouse, congratulating her 
 upon the appeal which she had made on behalf of the women 
 of Utah, in a little work which she had then just published. 
 Some correspondence subsequently ensued between the two 
 ladies who had so successfully attacked "the twin relics of 
 barbarism" — polygamy and slavery. They afterwards became 
 personally acquainted ; and when Mrs. Stenhouse requested 
 Mrs. Stowe to write the preface for her new work, that gifted 
 author unhesitatingly replied : " I am happy to be able to do 
 the least thing which can show how heartily I sympathise 
 with the effort you are making. May God bless both it 
 and you, is the prayer of yours ever truly, — H . B Stowe." 
 
PREFACE 
 
 BY 
 
 Mrs. Harriet Beecher Stowe, 
 
 In these pages, a woman, a wife and mother, speaks the 
 sorrows and oppressions of which she has been the witness 
 and the victim. 
 
 It is because her sorrows and her oppressions are those of 
 thousands, who, suffering Hke her, cannot or dare not speak 
 for themselves, that she thus gives this history to the public. 
 
 It is no sensational story, but. a plain, unvarnished tale of 
 truth, stranger and sadder than fiction. 
 
 Our day has seen a glorious breaking of fetters. The 
 slave-pens of the South have become a nightmare of the 
 past ; the auction-block and whipping-post have given place 
 to the church and school-house ; and the songs of emanci- 
 pated millions are heard through our lajid. 
 
 Shall we not then hope that the hour is come to loose the 
 bonds of a cruel slavery whose chains have cut into the very 
 hearts of thousands of our sisters — a slavery which debases 
 and degrades womanhood, motherhood, and the family.' 
 
 Let every happy wife and mother who reads these lines 
 give her sympathy, prayers, and efforts to free her sisters 
 from this degrading bondage. Let all the womanhood of the 
 country stand united for them. There is a power in com- 
 bined enlightened sentiment and sympathy before which 
 every form of injustice and cruelty must finally go down. 
 
 May He who came to break every yoke hasten this deliver- 
 ance. 
 
 HARRIET BEECHER STOWE. 
 
PREFACE. 
 
 In the fall of Jthe year 1869, a few earnest, thinking men, 
 members of the Mormon Church, and hving in Salt Lake 
 City, inaugurated what was regarded at the time as a grand 
 schism. Those who had watched with anxiety the progress of 
 Mormonism, hailed the " New Movement " as the harbinger 
 of the work of disintegration so long anticipated by the 
 thoughtful-minded Saints, and believed that the opposition to 
 Theocracy then begun, would continue until the extraordi- 
 nary assumptions of the Mormon priesthood were exploded, 
 and Mormonism itself should lose its political status and find 
 its place only among the singular sects of the day. 
 
 It was freely predicted that Woman, in her turn, would 
 accept her part in the work of reformation, take up the 
 marriage question among the Saints, and make an end of 
 polygamy. 
 
 Little did I imagine at that period, that any such mission 
 as that which I have since realised as mine, was in the Provi- 
 dence of Time awaiting me, or that I should ever have the 
 boldness, either with tongue or pen, to plead the cause of the 
 Women of Utah. But, impelled by those unseen influences 
 which shape our destinies, I took my stand with the " here- 
 tics ;" and, as it happened, my own was the first woman's 
 name enrolled in their cause. 
 
 The circumstances which wrought a change in my own 
 life produced a corresponding revolution in the life of my 
 husband. 
 
 In withdrawing from the Mormon Church, we laid our- 
 
Vlll . PREFACE. 
 
 selves, our associations and the labors of over twenty years, 
 upon the altar, and took up the burden of life anew. We 
 had sacrificed everything in obedience to the "counsel" of 
 Brigham Young ; and my husband, to give a new direction 
 to his mindj and also to form some plan for our future life, 
 thought it advisable that he should visit New York. He did 
 «o; and shortly after employed himself in writing a history 
 of the Mormon Church, which has since been published. 
 
 In course of time, the burden of providing for a large 
 family, and the anxiety and care of conducting successfully 
 a business among a people who make it a religious duty to 
 sternly set their faces against those who dissent from their 
 faith, exhausted my physical and mental strength. Consider- 
 ing, therefore, that change might be beneficial to me, and iny 
 own personal affairs urgently calling me to New York City, I 
 followed my husband thither. 
 
 On my way East, I met a highly-valued friend of my 
 family, who, in the course of our journey together over the 
 Pacific Railroad, enthusiastically urged me to tell the story 
 of my life, and to give to the world what I knew about 
 Polygamy. I had been repeatedly advised to do so by friends 
 at home, but up to that time no plan had been arranged 
 for carrying out the suggestion. 
 
 1 had hardly arrived in New York, before the electric 
 messenger announced that a severe snow-storm was raging 
 on the vast plains between the Rocky Mountains and the 
 Missouri River, and for several weeks all traffic over the 
 Union Pacific Railroad was interrupted, and I could not return 
 to my home in the distant West. 
 
 That unlooked-for snow-blockade became seriously annoy- 
 ing; for not only was I most anxious to return to my children, 
 but also, never having known an idle hour, I could not live 
 without something to do. At that moment of unsettled 
 feehng, a lady-friend, with whom I was visiting, suggested 
 again " the book ;" and she would not permit me to leave her 
 house, until she had exacted from me a promise that it should 
 be written. 
 
PREFACE. 
 
 IX 
 
 Next morning, I began my task in earnest. I faithfully- 
 kept my room and labored unremittingly ; and in three weeks 
 the manuscript of my little work on " Polygamy in Utah/' was 
 completed. 
 
 It was issued in pamphlet form, and . was very kindly 
 welcomed by the press — both secular and religious — and, 
 for this I was sincerely grateful. I had not, up to that time, 
 thought of much else than its effect upon the people of 
 Utah ; but the voluminous notices which that little book 
 received, showed the deep interest which the people of the 
 United States hadi taken in " the Mormon question," and how 
 ardently they desired to see the extinction of the polygamic 
 institution among the Saints. 
 
 In' Salt Lake City, I was so situated that I was daily — I 
 might almost say hourly — brought in contact with visitors 
 to the Modern Zion ; for, during the summer, thousands of 
 travellers pass over the Pacific Railroad. Not a few of these 
 called to see me ; and I received from ladies and gentlemen — 
 whose kind interest in my welfare I felt very deeply — many 
 personal attentions, many words of sympathy and encourage- 
 ment, and many intelligent and useful suggestions in respect 
 to my future life. Indeed, I saw myself quite unexpectedly, 
 and, I may truthfully say, without my own desire, become an 
 object of interest. 
 
 By the earnest suggestions of friends and strangers, and 
 by the widely published opinions of the press, I was made to 
 feel that I had but begun my work — that I had but partly drawn 
 aside the veil that covered the worst oppression and degrada- 
 tion of woman ever known in a civilised country. Nearly 
 all who spoke to me expressed their surprise that intelligent 
 men and women should be found in communion with the 
 Mormon Church, in which it was so clearly evident that the . 
 teachings of Christianity had been supplanted by an attempt 
 to imitate the barbarism of Oriental nations in a long past 
 age, and the sweet influences of the religion of Jesus were 
 superseded by the most objectionable practices of the ancient 
 Jews. How persons of education and refinement could ever 
 
X PREFACE, 
 
 have embraced a faith that prostrated them at the feet of 
 the Mormon Prophet, and his successor Brigham Young, was 
 to the enquiring mind a perfect mystery. 
 
 The numerous questions which I had to answer, and the 
 explanations which I had to give, shewed me that my little 
 book had only whetted the appetite of the intelligent investi- 
 gator, and that there was a general call for a woman's book 
 on Mormonism, a book that should reveal the inner life of 
 the Saints, — exhibit the influences which had contributed to 
 &raw Christian people away from Christian Churches to the 
 standard of the American Prophet, Joseph Smith, and subject 
 them to the power of that organisation which has, since his 
 death, subjugated the mass of the Mormon people in Utah 
 to the will and wickedness of the Priesthood under the leader- 
 ship of Brother Brigham. 
 
 There have from time to time appeared many works on 
 Mormonism which professed to give an insight into the "inner 
 life" of the Saints. Some of those books were written by 
 women ; some by visitors to Utah, or persons who had resided 
 for a longer or shorter period in the Territory ; and more than 
 one at least was published under the name of women who 
 claimed to be members of the Mormon Church. How un- 
 trustworthy the accounts of visitors and Gentiles are, and the 
 reason why such should be the case, I shall hereafter, in the 
 course of this volume, have occasion to explain ; — and that' 
 the autobiographies of supposed Mormon women were ecfually 
 •unreliable, the following facts will clearly denionstrate. 
 
 A French Lady — a Countess and a woman of the world — 
 Madame Olympe Odouard — came to see me in Salt Lake City. 
 She was a woman of intelligence and quick perception, with' 
 whom to spend an hour was a perfect pleasure. After her 
 return to France, she, of course, wrote a book, entitled Le Far 
 West. And in that book, (page 335,) she said : 
 
 " II y a deux grands joumaux %. Salt Lake City : le New Descret et le New 
 Telegraph. Mr. Stenhouse, le redacteur en chef du premier, est un homme 
 dminemment instruit. AUemand d'origine, il parte le Fran9ais tres purement. 
 Sa femme, n^e Fran^aise, est une femme du monde, bonne, charmante, tres- 
 instruite, bonne musicienne, et mJre de treize beaux enfants. C'est une ex'-ScEur 
 
PREFACE. xi 
 
 de Chariti et la seule femme Catholique et Fran9aise qu6 soit panni les Mor- 
 mones." 
 
 Some of my readers may perhaps have forgotten their 
 French lessons : I, therefore, translate : 
 
 There are two principal journals in Salt Lake City— the New Descret and the 
 New Telegraph. Mr. Stenhouse is editor-in-chief of the first He is a well- 
 taught man of German origin, and speaks the French language with the greatest 
 purity. His wife, a French lady, is a woman of the world — good looking, ikarra- 
 ing, well educated, a good musician, and the mother of thirteen fine children. 
 She is an ex-Sister of Charity, and the only French Catholic who has joined 
 the "Mormon Church." 
 
 Now here is an* example in type. Let us judge of its truth- 
 fulness. In the first place there never was such a paper as 
 the New Descret or the New Telegraph. The Deseret News 
 has been in existence for some years. My husband assisted 
 on its staff, but he was never editor-in-chief. The Daily Tel- 
 egraph was my husband's own paper, but it never appeared 
 under any other name. Little items may seem of small im- 
 portance, but in a case where truthfulness is called in question, 
 they are worth mentioning. Mr. Stenhouse is a Scotchman 
 by birth, and I am an Englishwoman. His acquaintance with 
 the French tongue is, of course; limited ; while I; for my part, 
 never was, or will be, either a Roman Catholic or a Sister of 
 Charity. Ten, and not thirteen "fine" children are all who call 
 me mother ; and at the time when Madame Olympe wrote there 
 were only eight. Here I state the whole case briefly. Let 
 the reader judge of the truthfulness of "travellers' stories." 
 
 That comprehensive and truthful works on this subject 
 have appeared, I readily admit, but most of them are mere 
 sketches : — such, for example, as that by Secretary Ferris — a 
 Gentile, but a fair and impartial author ; — or else were pub- 
 lished — as that, for instance, by John Hyde, a good man and 
 a vigorous writer — so many years ago that they are now, to a 
 great extent, out of date. Mrs. Waite is the best Gentile 
 lady-writer; but for obvious reasons, although she was a 
 woman of intelligence and penetration, her knowledge of the 
 inner life of Mormonism was necessarily circumscribed. 
 
 Two books appeared, each claiming to be written by genu- 
 
Xll PREFAgB. 
 
 ine Mormbn women. They were, however, originally pub- 
 lished fifteen or twenty years ago ; and although they are still 
 on sale, they are, as a matter of course, silent concerning 
 recent events. The first of these two volumes was really 
 written by a gentleman who was himself neither a Mormon 
 nor had any intimate acquaintance with the system and doc- 
 trinds of that people. He obtained from the lady — the sup- 
 posed author — all the information which she was capable of 
 imparting, and then worked it up in a startling and sensational 
 manner, mingling facts and -fiction in such a way that the 
 Mormons have always declared that the whole volume was a 
 scandalous libel. 
 
 The other volume was first published nearly twenty years 
 ago. It was professedly written by the wife of a Mormon elder ; 
 but it was really the production of an old lady in New Jersey, 
 who had never even been out to Utah, and who drew entirely 
 upon her own imagination for all that she could not adapt 
 from other sensational writers on Mormonism. This book 
 was first published by a New York firm, and being supposed 
 by the innocent public to be genuine, it had an extraordinary 
 circulation — ^forty or fifty thousand being sold. The publish- 
 ers, however, failed, and the stereotype plates passed into other 
 hands. Subsequently the work having come under the notice 
 of a subscription firm at Hartford, they negotiated for the use 
 of the plates. One word of the heading of each page was 
 cut out, a new title was selected, some old illustrations and a 
 few new ones were added, and an ancient steel-plate por- 
 trait, which had once done duty in some book of poetry or 
 illustrated volume of fashionable beauties of years ago, was 
 vamped up, and the supposed signature of the fictitious author 
 was engraved beneath it. This book, now re-christened, and 
 apparently a new volume, was launched upon the market. It 
 is at the present moment advertised in many local newspapers, 
 and the confiding public cheerfully buy it under the impres- 
 sion that it is the genuine production of a Mormon woman. 
 Such is the history of some of the so-called autobiographies 
 which have appeared. 
 
PREFACE. Xiii 
 
 I mention these facts to show that the demand for a true 
 history by a real Mormon woman has never yet been supplied. 
 It was this knowledge which induced me to pubHsh my former 
 little work, and encourages me to hope that the present vol- 
 ume may meet with acceptance. 
 
 A few months after the publication of my first book, I was 
 invited to lecture upon " Polygamy in Utah," and wherever I 
 spoke I observed the same spirit of enquiry and met with a 
 renewed demand for more of circumstance and narrative — 
 which I had, from a sense of personal delicacy, withheld in 
 my former work. • 
 
 I saw no way of satisfying myself and others than by 
 accepting the rather spiteful invitation of a certain Mormon 
 paper to " Tell it all," and this, in a narrative of my own 
 personal experience, which I now present to the reader, I 
 have endeavored to do. Myself not in any sense a literary 
 woman, or making any pretensions as a writer, I hope to 
 escape severe criticism from the public and the press. I 
 had a simple story to tell — the story of my life and of the 
 wrongs of women in Utah. Startling and terrible facts have 
 fallen under my observation. These also I have related ; but 
 my constant effort has been to tell my story in the plainest, 
 simplest way, and "to avoid exaggeration, but never shrink 
 from a straightforward statement of facts. I have disguised 
 nothing, and palliated nothing ; and I feel assured that those 
 who from their actual and intimate acquaintance with Mor- 
 monism in Utah as it really is, are capable of passing a just 
 and impartial judgment upon my story, will pronounce without 
 hesitation that I have told "the truth, the whole truth, and 
 nothing but the truth," 
 
 FANNY STENHOUSE. 
 
 Salt Lake City, Utah, 
 
c5o:K'i'^]^'''^- 
 
 CHAPTER L 
 
 MY EARLY LIFE. 
 
 Thk Memory of my Youthful Days— Early Religious Impressions— I become 
 a Church-Member— My Pious Admirer— A brief Homily on Feminine 
 Vanities— My first Start in Life— Faithful Counsels of a Friend— Life 
 in a French School— The Maison-Martin— Preparing my Lessons— Ob- 
 jecting to a Protestant— "Assisting" at Service— My Ghostly Adviser— 
 The " instructions" of a Handsome Young Priest — Flirtation and Apos- 
 tolic Succession— The Blind Leading the Blind— The Scene of Labor 
 Changed— Domestic Life at St. Brieux— An indifferent Young Gentle- 
 man—The Presence of an " Icicle"— Quiet Attentions to " Mademoiselle- 
 Miss"— The Man who Waits Wins— My Affianced Lover— Reasons why 
 a French Girl Marries — Views of Marriage among the French — Traces of „ 
 Eariy Teachings— Mental Struggles and Doubts— I Resolve to Visit 
 England— The Crisis of My Life. 31 
 
 CHAPTER II. 
 
 MY FIRST INTRODUCTION TO MORMONISM. 
 
 Returning Home — " Au Jievoir"—A Visit to Jersey— The Home of my 
 Childhood — My First Introduction to Mormonism — An "Apostate's" 
 View of the Saints — Revelation and Roguery — A Matter of Personal 
 Interest — A Lady's Logic — A Warning against the New Religion — First 
 Visit to a Mormon Meeting — Catching the " Mormon Fever" — SnuTsbing 
 an Elder — A Polite Saint — Fighting a Delusion — Among Dear Friends — 
 " Full of the Spirit" — Religion in Practical Life — Preparing Comforts 
 for the Missionary Elders — Emotional Religion — The Testimony of the 
 Spirit — Sunday Service among the Saints — Contagious Enthusiasm — The 
 Story of a too-confiding Convert — How He Went out to Zion — Terrible 
 Fate of an Apostate — Killed by " the Indians" — Preaching under Diffi- 
 culties — My First Introduction to my Future Husband — "The Other 
 Daughter from France" — The Eloquence of Elder Stenhouse — Creating 
 an Impression— A Memorable Era in My Life. 39 
 
CONTENTS. XV 
 
 CHAPTER III. 
 
 THE LABOR OF MV LIFE BEGUN : — HOW THE MORMON MISSIONARIES MADE 
 
 CONVERTS. 
 
 A. Confirmation Meeting — The Age for Baptism — How Sister Martha was 
 Confirmed — How Mormon Saints are " Blessed" — The Spirit of Prophecy 
 — A Lecture by Elder Stenhouse — The New Gospel Explained — A Vision 
 of Latter-Day Glory — How I was Convinced — The Finger of Destiny 
 Draws Me On — A Mormon Baptism — I Become a Member of the Church 
 — I am Baptised, Confirmed, and Blessed — I begin a New Life — A 
 Happy Dream of Missionary Usefulness — I begin Work with Enthusiasm 
 — Methodism and Mormonism Compared — How Converts are Made — Re- 
 ligious Revivals — The Anxious Seats — A Testimony Meeting — How Brig- 
 ham Young has Damped the Ardor of the Saints — Magical Effects of an 
 Elder's Speech — The Mormoii Marsellaise — Effects of Song upon Reli- 
 gious Feeling. ..jo 
 
 CHAPTER IV. 
 
 LIFE AMONG THE SAINTS — MY NEW ENGAGEMENTS. 
 
 Beginning Life as a Mormon — Breaking Way from the Past — My Friends in 
 France — Placed in a DifiScult Position — I Remember my Betrothed — Ex- 
 cltreiveness of my New Faith — An " Apostle" Lays Down the Law — How 
 to Keep aloof from the Gentiles — Woman's Duty — " The Foundation of 
 a Little Family Kingdom"— The " Gift of Tongues" in Modem Days-^- 
 "An Extraordinary Meeting — Sister Ellis exercises her " Gift" — Need of an 
 Interpreter — Emotional Religion — How Brother Brigham once " Spake in 
 Tongues" — A " High Time" at Kirtland in the days of Joseph — A Scene 
 in the Lion House — One of the Prophet's Wives "Speaks" — Another 
 Wife Interprets — I Receive a Blessing — Brother Young Discountenances 
 the " Gift"— Only half Convinced—" To Doubt is Sin"— I Arrive at an 
 Important Conclusion — I instruct Elder Stenhouse in the French language 
 —An Interesting Pupil — Declining the verb y'Aime — Studies in the Back 
 Parlor — A Persevering Young Man — Why I listened to Elder Stenhouse's 
 Suit — I am Engaged to Him — I become a Missionary's Wife — I Write to 
 my Friends in France — A Free Confession — Pleasant Memories of the 
 Past. 6i 
 
 CHAPTER V. 
 
 ;ilORMON WONDERS : — ^ANOINTINGS AND MIRACLES. 
 
 How a " Miracle" was Performed — The Evidence of One's Senses — Suc- 
 cessful use of Scripture Arguments — Mormon verstis Local Preacher — 
 A lively Discussion — A little " Personal" Matter — A Man who Never Saw 
 a Miracle — Success Dependent upon Faith — " I Hardly know what to 
 Think of It" — A New Convert — How Sister Armstrong was Healed — A 
 Genuine Case — Five Years of Helplessness — Testing the Claims : — A 
 
xvi CONTENTS. 
 
 fair Proposal-The Faithful Accept the Offer-The Magnetic Principle- 
 A good Dose of Oil— How the Anointing was Performed :-Aaron Out- 
 done-Making the Passes-An Exhausting Labor-" Give me your Hand, 
 Brother"-" Have faith, Sister Armstrong !"-" We Thought that She 
 was Dead"— My first Introduction to Mary Burton— A Wilful Lassie 
 We become Fast Friends-Seeing is Sometimes Believing-Elder Sten- 
 house Works a Miracle :-Cures a man of the Cholera-How a "regular 
 battle" was Fought-A Wife's unprofitable Faith-How the Miraculous 
 Power was All Used Up-How my Husband made himself Useful again. 74 
 
 CHAPTER VI. 
 
 THE FIRST WHISPERINGS OF POLYGAMY. 
 
 Meeting a Living "Apostle"— The London Conference— What I Expected— 
 Four Apostles at One Time— The Charms of a Priestly Life— Leading 
 About a " Sister"— The " Mystery of Godliness"— Imitating Solomon— 
 The Formation of a " Branch"— Doing the Work of the Lord— The 
 Apostle Lorenzo Snow— An Argument by the Way— Silent Snow— The 
 Apostle Snow Thaws at the Right Time— How a Convenient Revelation 
 was Thrice Received— Unwilling Consent— A Cruel Wrong— He Would 
 be Five Years Away— The Conference Organised— A Mission to Italy — 
 A Pleasant Position for a Wife— The Vicissitudes of a Year— God's Mercy 
 a Safe Trust— A Valedictory Picnic— Not Far from Netley Abbey— Bid-* 
 ding Good-bye to the Missionaries— My Ideas of My Husband's Work- 
 Mary Suggests a New Idea— What She Said—" I'm Not a Little Girl"— 
 "I Kissed Her, and Continued"— All, all False— Elder Stenhouse Departs 
 'for Italy— Italy is the End of Our Miserable Hopes— How the Missiona- 
 ries Departed— I Bid Adieu to My Husband. 9° 
 
 CHAPTER VII. 
 
 MY husband's mission : — I AM LEFT ALONE. 
 
 The Italian Mission-'A Saint's Responsibility — Obliging a Friend — The 
 Pains and Penalties of a. Saintly Life — My Letters to my Husband — The 
 Whisperings of the Coming Storm — Polygamy Denied— The Wretched 
 Subterfuges of certain Elders — The Lying Basis of Polygamy — WhSt 
 Apostle Taylor said — My Personal Experience — How Polygamy was Intro- 
 duced among the Saints — I want to find My own Groove — Suffering for 
 Conscience Sake-^Lonely Contemplation of a Weary Soul — The Ameri- 
 can Apostles — " Without Purse or Scrip" — The Swiss Mission — My own 
 Enthusiasm — My Darling Clara — Lighting the "load" of Love — Mary 
 Burton's Love Affairs — The Apostle Lorenzo Snow — ^^Missionary Work — 
 I Bear my own Troubles Alone — The Difficulties of Missionary Work — 
 A Shoemaker who respected his Soul — Work Indefatigable — Le Gover- 
 neur d6 L' Hopital— Our New Convert — Days of Poverty — Practical 
 Faith— How we Endured — The Darkness which Precedes the Dawn — The 
 Suffering of all who Work to Win. loi 
 
CONTENTS. XVll 
 
 CHAPTER VIII. 
 
 OUR MISSION IN SWITZERLAND ;— MUTTERINGS OF THE COMING STORM. 
 
 An Apostle Comes to Help Me— How the Wives of Missionaries were Sup- 
 ported—I Meet with Friends — My Attempts at Proselytizing — Madame 
 Baliff Rejects the Revelation — Primitive Meetings of the Saints— Certain 
 liashful iiea — A Lady Weak in the Faith— How My Faith was Tried— 
 " If You Could Get that Child Healed"— Wanted: The Gift of Healing— 
 What Governor Stoudeman Did — The Fate of a Little_ Child— Madame 
 Baliff Makes a Suggestion — An Effort of Faith — My Doubts and Fears — 
 An Anxious Night — Mary Burton's Letter — Elder Shrewsbury Manifests 
 Himself— A Girl's Opinion of Her Lover— Fears of Polygamy — Certain 
 Imprudent Elders — The American Brethren — Learning a Business — Jeal- 
 ous of Her Husband— "My Elder"— An Unsettled Mind— Obtaining 
 Information — Nothing Determined. • 121 
 
 CHAPTER IX. 
 
 THE REVELATION ON CELESTIAL "MARRIAGE." 
 
 Wjitinc; for the Revelation— The Millennial S/at — The Revelation on the 
 Order of " Celestial Marriage" — " My Servant Joseph" — The Keys of the 
 Kingdom — Marrying for Eternity — The Unpardonable Sin — Being "As 
 tl^e Angels" — Sealed by the Holy Spirit — Shedding Innocent Blood — The 
 Example of Abraham — The Power of the Priesthood — " Mine Handmaid, 
 Emma Smith" — If He have Ten Virgins Given Unto Him" — Let this 
 Suffice for the Present — An Astonishing Message from Heaven — Learning 
 to Bear the Cross — Without Hope — Longing to Confide in Some One — 
 My Indignant Reception of the " Revelation" — " I Dared Not even Kneel 
 to God"—" There Was a Knock at My Chamber Door"— Not a Very 
 Entertaining Party— "The Old Gentleman Stood the Test"— Monsieur 
 Fetitpierre " Thmlfs Prayerfully Over the Matter." ■ - - - 134 
 
 CHAPTER X. 
 
 MISSIONARY WORK :— TEACHING POLYGAMY. 
 
 Preaching Polygamy— A Phase of Missionary Life — An Embarrassing Posi- 
 tion—Bearing the Cross-^One Ever-Present Thought— The Haunting 
 Spectre of My Life— My Little Daughter Clara— The Work of Repen- 
 tance — Why Men are Sent on Mission — Working in the Dark — Days and 
 Nights of Prayer and Fasting — Preparing for Work— Breaking the News — 
 My First Convert— The Victim Chosen— The " Beauties" of " Celestial" 
 Matrimony"— Introducing a Pleasant Subject— "Came Down Stairs Sing- 
 ing"— A Cruel Task—" Does My, Serge Believe This ?"— " I Tried to 
 Comfort Her"— Not Wisely, but Too Well— How the Swiss Women Re- 
 ceived the Revelation — A Companion in Misery — ^A Letter from Mary 
 Burton— Polygamy in England — Elder Shrewsbury in Difficulties — Love 
 and Religion— How Polygamy Was Denied — Looking Most Miserable— 
 
 "He Kissed My Hand SorrowfuUy." l4« 
 
 2 
 
SVHl CONTENTS. 
 
 CHAPTER XI. 
 
 MORMONISM IN ENfe^ANiJ :— PE'E^ARING TO EMIGRATE. 
 
 A Blissful State Qf Ignorance — The Opinions of Monsieur Petitpierre — Strohg 
 Arguments — How He Became an Apostate — " He Shall Rule over Her" — 
 The Nobler Sex — How Women were Sufficiently Honored— Looking 
 Anxiously for a Change — Establishing a Mormon Paper— Denouncing the 
 Gentiles — Terrible Expectations — Hastening toZion — A Journey of Many 
 Days — The Swiss Pilgrims — Death by the Way — Disobeying Counsel — 
 The "Judgments" of the Lord — The Love of Many Waxes Cold — The 
 President of the London Conference — Distinguished Apostates — Strange 
 News from Zion — An "Object of Interest" — Great Success of Mormon- 
 ism in Britain — How Saints were Re-baptized — Poor Elder Marsdenl — 
 The Emigration Season — My Little Daughter Minnie — Saintly Treatment 
 — A Visit from Mary Burton — How Love Affairs Progressed — Pacifying 
 a Lover — The Meaning of the Word "Patience." - - ■ - - 154 
 
 CHAPTER XII. 
 
 EMIGRATION TO ZION: — WE ARRIVE IN NEW YORK. 
 
 Mary Burton Tells her Story — A Persevering Lover — A Long Conversation 
 — Some "Strong Points" of the Revelation— A Trifling Circumstance — 
 Teririble Doings in Zion — How Orson Hyde became an Apostate — He 
 Bears Witness Against Joseph Smith — "Danites^' and "Avenging An- 
 gels "—Murders Committed by "Indians!" — Emigration in the Old 
 Times— A Journey of Nine Months — How the Mormon Emigration was 
 Managed— A Favored Apostle — How the Profits were Pocketed — On 
 Board Shii^^We Sufler Loss — How we were Deceived — An Untruthful 
 Apostle — How Poor Mr. Tennant was Robbed — Brigham Young Acts 
 his Accustomed Part — Love and Marriage at Sea — Cooking Under DifH- 
 culties-" Harry and the Rats" — A Smart Lad — An Ancient Scotch Sis- 
 ter-^ Working "for a Cbnsideration"— Christmas on Board Ship — Cruel 
 Treatment of Seamen— A New Year in the New World. - - .167 
 
 CHAPTER XIII. 
 
 LIFE IN NEW YORK: — CONDUCTING A MORMON PAPER. 
 
 An Introduction to a New World— The New York Saints— How Certain 
 Elders Disapjjeared- An Uncomfortable Week— Left all Alone— Love 
 Waxing Cold— Mental Slavery— The School-House at Williamsburgh— 
 Miserable Condition of the Emigrants— Suffering for Their Faith— The 
 Apostle Taylor Lectures the Saints— Some Smart " Counsel"— Buying 
 Shovels— An Unprofitable Speculation— The "Mean Yankee Gentiles"— 
 Days and Nights of Trial— How the "Mormon'^ was Edited— A Rather 
 Small Salary— The Doings of High-Priests and " Seventies"— An Amiable 
 Connecticut Girl— Half-a-Dozeri Wives— Permission from Brigham Young 
 —Certain Elders wholiad "Disease of the Heart"— The Course of True 
 Love— A Young Widow Who Looked Well in Weeds— Arranging the 
 Affairs of the Heart— The True Sourcfe of Modem Revelations. - -179 
 
eONTENTSk 
 
 XIX 
 
 CHAPTER XIV, 
 
 SAINTLY PILGRIMS ON THE WAY — THE "DIVINE" HAND-CART SCHEME, 
 
 The Eastern Saints — Service in Williamsburgh — The ''Prophet of the Lord" 
 Tries an Experiment — The Pilgrims Cross the Plains— The Hand-Cart 
 Scheme— Thi; Poor Enr.igrants — A " Divine" Plan — The Great Gathering 
 to Zion — An Ihteresting Letter from Mary Burton — How Elder Shrews- 
 bury \Von his Bride— A Solemn Oath Against Polygamy — Mary Burton's 
 Marriage^— Arrival of the Hand-Cart Emigrants — Scene at Castle Garden 
 — Meeting wuh Mary Burtoii and' her Husband— The Story Of her Court- 
 ship—Her Trustful Enthusiasm — Proposing to make Brigham Young a 
 King — Anticipations of War — H-ow the Prophet Defrauded Brother Ten- 
 nant of Sixty Thqusand Dollars— The Pilgrims Leave for the West — The 
 Story of a Truant VVife — Second Thoughts are Sometimes Best — The 
 Mormon Paper Comes to Grief — A New Trial of Faith — Literary Work — 
 Waiting for Permission to Journey Zionward. ...... igi 
 
 CHAPTER XV. 
 
 A TERRIBLE STORY: — THE HAND-CART EMIGRANTS CROSSING THE PLAINS. 
 
 The Hand-Cart Emigration — Mary Burton's Story — Crossing the Plains — 
 The Camp at Iowa City — Shameful Neglect of the Church Authorities — 
 Making the Hand-Carts^The Outfit of the Emigrants — On the Way— 
 "A Day's March Nearer Home"-:— Stovit-hearted Pilgrims — Traveling 
 through Iowa — Showing Kindness to the Emigrants — Need of Help and 
 Sympathy — Perils and Privations of the Journey — How they Suffered 
 Hiinger, and Fainted by the Way — Very Scanty Rations — Distress of the 
 Women and Children: the Weak and the Sickly — How the Church "took 
 Care" of the Emigrants' Money — Suffering from the Heat— Arriving at 
 Florence, near Omaha — How a Mass-meeting was Held— Taking Counsel 
 — A Rash and Foolish Decision-^Offering to Swallow a Show-Storm— 
 Brave Advice of Elder Leyi_ Sayage — " Weak in the Faith" — How they 
 Continued their fatal Pilgrimage— The Camp at Eventide — False and 
 Dangerous Security-r-The Carts Break Down — The Cattle Stampede — 
 On Short Allowance — Visitors of Importance Arrive — Delusive Prophecy 
 of the Apostles— How they took the Bread of the Starving— Selfish Con- 
 duct of Saintly Leaders — Promises of Help. - . ^ . . - 206 
 
 CHAPTER XVI. 
 
 MARY BURTON'S STORY CONTINUED: — TERRIBLE ENDING OF THE HAND- 
 CART SCHEME. 
 
 The Pilgrims Arrive at Laramie— Disappointed Hopes— A Message from 
 the Apostle Richards— Help Again Promised— Fearful Sufferings and 
 Privations of the Emigrants — The Frosts of Winter Come On — The 
 Sterip-Clouds are Gathering-^Presentiments of Death — The Night-Air of 
 the Wilderness— The Bitter End— A Wife's Unchanging Devotion- 
 Death in the Camp— Falling by the Way— A Shocking Incident— Faithful 
 Even in Death— The Good Deeds of Elder Chislett — How Faith Sustained 
 
XX CONTENTS. 
 
 Them— Lost in the Snow-Storm— Brigiiam Young's Tardy Repentance— 
 "Joseph A." Comes to the Rescue— In the Grasp of Death— Fearful 
 Position of a Brave Woman— The Evil Day Comes at Last— A Night of 
 Horrors— Waiting for Assistance— The Finger of Death— The Cry of the 
 Wolves— A Scene too Terrible for Description— Who Died That Night 
 —"God was Near Me Then "—A Change for the Better— Three Anxious 
 Days— Light at Eventide— " iHelp Came Too Late for Them"— The 
 Victims of Fanaticism— The Remnant that Arrived— The Concliision of 
 a Terrible Story. ^ ■ - ■ 22» 
 
 CHAPTER XVII. 
 
 WE FORSAKE ALL, AND SET OUT FOR ZION — OUR JOURNEY ACROSS THB 
 
 PLAINS. , 
 
 Considering Our Position — Doubts and Fears— A Visit from the Apostle Geo. 
 Q. Cannon — We are " Counselled" to Emigrate — Giving up All for the 
 Church — Taking Charge of the Emigrants — The Insignificance of Women 
 — Wives are Never to Follow their own Judgment—" Be Obedient" — We 
 Begin our Pilgrimage — The Perpetual Emigration Fund — How Mormon 
 Emigration is Managed — Settling the Debts of a Lady-Love — How Cer- 
 tain Imprudent Englishmen Have Suffered — The " Emigration" of Miss 
 ■Blank — An Ancient " Sister" who was Forced to Wait — Living Contra- 
 dicti&ns — First Glimpse of Salt Lake City-7-A Glorious Panorama — The 
 Spectre of my Existence — The Prison-Walls of the Mountains — Without 
 Hope — Life in the Wagons — Search for a House — " Roughing It" in 
 Zion — First Impressions — A Cheerless Prospect for Winter — Daniel H. 
 Wells Promises Assistance — A Woful Spectacle of Tallow Candles — 
 Odorous Illumination — " L' Eglise c'est moP' — "An Ugly Man with a Cast 
 in his Eve" — An Awkward Mistake — Beginning Life in Zion. - - - 237 
 
 CHAPTER XVIII. 
 
 MY FIRST IMPRESSIONS OF THE CITY OF THE SAINTS. 
 
 Some Personal Observations — An Innocent Prophet — Living Witnesses Of 
 the Truth— How Salt Lake City was Laid Out and Built— The Houses of 
 Many- Wived Men— My First Sunday in the Tabernacle— Curious Millin- 
 ery of Liidy Saints— Two Remarkable Young Ladies— A Doubtful Exper- ■ 
 iment— How Service is Conducted in the Tabernacle— Extraordinary 
 Sermons— Deceitful Dealings of the Original Prophet — Why Joseph, 
 the " Seer," Married Miss Snow— Another of the Prophet's Wives— A , ; 
 Shameful Story — Aunty Shearer, and her Funny Ways — Spiritual Wives 
 and Proxy Wives— How the Saints are Married for Time and for Eternity 
 —Concerning Certain Generous Elders— How Wives are Secretly 
 
 " Sealed" — Ej^traordinary Request of One of Brigham's Wives " The 
 
 Next Best Thing"— Mormon Ideas of the Marriage at Cana— The "Fix- 
 ins" of a Mormon Husband- How "The Kingdom" is Built Up— Women 
 Only to be Saved by Their Husbands— A Painful Story— A Very Cau- 
 
CONTENTS. Xxi 
 
 / 
 
 tious Woman — A Woman who wanted to be "Queen" — A Deceitfnl 
 Lover— A Strange Home- Picture^" These Constitute my Kingdom" — 
 Forebodings. 246 
 
 CHAPTER XIX. 
 
 BRIGHAM YOUNG AT HOME: — WE VISIT THE PROPHET AND HIS WIVES. 
 
 Inside the Lion House — The Family-Circle of the Prophet— A Gracious Re- 
 ception — A Woman's Description of Brigham Young-^His Early Life 
 and Struggles— Working for "Six Bits" a Day— How he "Ate Up all the 
 Corn" — How he Worked as a Painter and Glazier — Born at the Right 
 Time — Brigham Young's Character Summed Up — How he Obtained his 
 Position — The Twelve Apostles of Mormonism — Intrigues for Place and 
 Power — Pulling the Nose of a Queen — Delivered Over to " The Buffetings 
 of Satan"— Poor Sidney!- The " First Presidency"— Yearly Elections— A 
 Foe to Education — What Boys and Girls Should Learn — An Unfortu- 
 nate Musical Society — Moral Delinquencies of the Prophet — Borrowing 
 Clothes for a Conferences-How a Million Dollars were Borrowed and 
 Paid! — Brigham's Avarice, Cowardice, and Thefts — A Terrible Despotism 
 — Lost Opportunities, 263 
 
 CHAPTER XX. 
 
 THE WIVES OF BRIGHAM YOUNG: — THEIR HISTORY AND THEIR DAILY LIFE. 
 
 The Prophet at Home — His Own Little Family — Domestic Life of a Patri- 
 arch — Wife the First — Two Sisters Married to the Same Man —Brigham's 
 Son at West Point— She " Had her Day"— A Troublesome Wife— The 
 Privileges of Mormon Women — Shocking Case of Infatuation — Emmeline 
 The Forsaken Favorite — The Fickle Fancies of the Prophet : — Amelia: 
 " the Queen of the Harem" — The Follies of a Modern Prophet— The 
 Charms of Julia Dean — The Spirit of the Prophet Subdued by Amelia's 
 Will — Eliza Ann Tells her Own Story — How Brother Brigham Won his 
 Last Wife — Fictions and Frauds — Brigham Names the Marriage Day — 
 He Came " Just as it Happened" — Getting Groceries in a Small Way — 
 " Two Bits' worth of Fresh Meat"— The Conclusion of Eliza- Ann's Story 
 — A Patriarchal Family — The Father of Fifty Children — A Questionable 
 Story — " Whose Child is He" — Inside the Prophet's Mansion — Poeket- 
 Money and Divorce — Domestic Life of the Prophet — Entertaining a Vis- 
 itor — How a Large Family is Managed — The Patriarch at Home. - - 275 
 
 CHAPTER XXI. 
 
 THE ORIGIN OF " THE REFORMATION" •- EXTRAORDINARY DOINGS OF THE 
 
 SAINTS. 
 
 Some Peculiar Mormon Doctrines — The Faith of the Saints — Extraordinary 
 Ideas of Sacred Subjects — Polytheism Taught — Preexistence of the Soul — 
 Assisting the Spirits to Emigrate—" The Body that Shall Be"— The Ori- 
 
XXU CONTENTS. 
 
 gin of the Devil— Brigham's Adam Deity— " Kolbb":— the Snn of Suns- 
 Father Adam Descends to Eden— The Grades of the Priesthood— Place 
 and Position In the Church— Ofe<ft>««-the Cardinal Virtue— Patriarchal 
 Blessings— How an Ancient Dame Sold her Petticoats to Buy a Blessing 
 —The Thin End of the Wedge— Terrible Doings in Missouri— Mormon 
 Politics— The Avenging Angels— Origin of the "Danites"— Whisperings of 
 Dark Deeds— The Bearded " Daughters" of Zion— Brigham's Threat — 
 The "Death Society"— The Prophet Smith Murdered — "Milking the 
 Gentiles"—" Whittling an Apostate"— Treasonable Speeches and Prac- 
 tices — Brigham as Governor of Utah — Great Excitement in Salt Lake 
 City— A Crisis. 295 
 
 CHAPTER XXII. 
 
 THE "REIGN OF TERROR" IN UTAH: — THE REFORMATION OF THE SAINTS. 
 
 Days of Trouble in the Valley — Shedding Innocent Blood — What is Murder ? 
 About Killing a Cat— Better than Their Faith— Cutting Throats for Love 
 —The Deeds of the Apostle "Jeddy"— The Celebrated Mule— The Saints 
 Accused — Missionaries Called Home — Their Consciences Accuse Them! 
 — The Blood-Atonement — What was Said in the Tabernacle — Terrible 
 Doctrines Taught — Brigham a " God!" — Fearful Blasphemy of Brigham 
 Young — The Shedding of Blood—" Righteously" Murdered — The Princi- 
 ples of Eternity — Deeds of Darkness — A " Saint" Murders his Wife — A 
 Terrible Story — How Children Were Married — A Petticoat on a Fence- 
 Pole — A Scarcity of Unmarried Girls — Obeying " Counsel" — Propositions 
 of Marriage — A Trifling Mistake — Stubborn Facts and Figures — The 
 Most Fearful Deed of All. 310 
 
 CHAPTER XXIII. 
 
 THE MOUNTAIN MEADOWS' MASSACRE: — " I WILL REPAY, SAITH THE LORD." 
 
 The Train from Arkansas — The Story of a Friend — How an Apostle Merited 
 Death — ^Mormon Hospitality ? — How Justice Slumbered — That Sinner, 
 McLean — Weary and Footsore — What the Governor of the Territory Did 
 not Do — The Story of a Frightful Sin— A Weary Journey — " Without a 
 Morsel of Bread" — Christian-like Indians — Empty Wagons — Military 
 Murderers- Corn, but no Mercy — A Regular Military Call— Pursuing the 
 Pilgrims— The Muster-Call— The Little Children not to be Killed— The 
 Infamous John D. Lee— The Flag of Truce—" The State of Deseret"— A 
 Deed of Fearful Treachery — Surrounded by " Indians!" — The Emigrants 
 Besieged— Dying for Want of Water— Without Bread— The Mountain 
 Meadows — Atrocious Mormon Villainy — The White Flag — The "Indi- 
 ans" Again — The Mormon Story of the Massacre — Treachery — ^The 
 " White" Indians — Mormon Perfidy — How the Emigrants Were Betrayed 
 —Marching to Death — A Few Children Saved— The Sipoil — The Murder 
 of Many Men — The End of a Terrible Story. ,24 
 
CONTENTS. jjxiii 
 
 CHAPTER XXIV. 
 
 WAYS AND WORKS OF THE SAINTS :— THE PROPHET'S MILLINERY BILI. 
 
 Life in Zion— Introduced to Brother Heber — ." Have you got the Blues !" — 
 A Wife's Trials : Counselled to Take Another Wife— The Tabernacle 
 Sermons — The Crowning Glory of a Man — Spiritual Food — " Filled with 
 the Devil" — Face to Face with Polygamy — Winter in Salt Lake City — A 
 New Position — I Produce my Treasures — My "Talkative Friend" — Com- 
 forting Visitors — "I Don't Like Crying Women" — Afraid of Opposition 
 — Paid in Salt Chips and Whetstones -Creating a Business — " Something 
 Like Home" — A Bonnet for Brigham's Favorite Wife — Running up a 
 Little Bill — How the tifirtest Prophet Paid It — Has He any Conscience f — 
 My whole Fortune Gone. - 340 
 
 CHAPTER XXV. 
 
 MYSTERIES OF THE ENDOWMENT HOUSE : — FEARFUL OATHS AND SECRET 
 
 CEREMONIES. 
 
 Saintly Privileges — The Origin of the Endowments — The Fraternity of the 
 Saints — Story of the Mysteries — Shocking Doings in Days Gone By — 
 Whisperings of Terrible Deeds — How the Mormons Mind Their Own 
 Business — The Temple Garments — Inside the Endowment House — The 
 Book of Life — Our Robes and Our Oil Bottles — The Washings and 
 Anointings — The High Priestess — Invoking Blessings — The Mysterious 
 Garment — A New Name-^The Garden of Eden — An Extraordinary Rep- 
 resentation — The Duplicate of the Devil — The First Degree — Terrible 
 and Revengeful Oaths — The Punishment of the Apostate — Pains and Pen- 
 alties of Betrayal — Grips and Passwords — The Mysterious Mark — Singular 
 Ajjostplic Sermon — The Second Degree — Secret and Significant Signs — 
 Behind the Veil— The Third Degreft— Celestial Matrimony— Eight Hours 
 of " Mystery" — I Justify Myself. 352 
 
 CHAPTER XXVI, 
 
 SECRETS OF SAINTLY SPOUSES : — ^A VISIT FROM MV TALKATIVE FRIENDt 
 
 Receive Congratulations — A " Bit of Advipe" — How a. Woman found 
 Wives for Her Husband — A " Rather Backward Man" — How a Mormon 
 Husband was Managed — Anxious for Alice to Marry — A Very Obedient 
 Husband — Marrying for Principle": Not Love— How Saints are Silly over 
 New Wives— Taking Life Easily— "Miss Alice ! We shall See"^Bring- 
 ing Home a " Sister" — Wife, Number Three — How a Wife Lost Her 
 Influence — How a Wife Consoled Herself Under Difficulties — Understand- 
 ing the " Order of the Kingdom" — TJie Necessity of Having Two Wives 
 at Least — ^Not Needful to Fall in Love— A Good Example. - - -370 
 
XXiV CONTENTS. 
 
 CHAPTER XXVII. 
 
 SOCIAL LIFE IN SALT LAKE CITY :— BALL-ROOMS, " WALL-FLOWERS," AND 
 
 DIVORCE. 
 
 Seeking for Old Friends— In the Ball-Room— Social Life— How Brother 
 Brigham Built a Theatre— Short-Sightedness of the Prophet— Poets and 
 Polygamy Disagree— What a Woman would Think— The Ideal of True 
 Love— Unpleasant Comparisons— Bearing the Cross— Rathei' Old Boys- 
 Subduing a Wife and Getting a Wife— What the Wives Say in Secret- 
 Introduced to an Apostle's Five Wives—" I'm Afraid You are Not Too 
 Strong in the Faith"— The " Model Saint"— Improved Prospects— An Old 
 Friend Discovered— Another Victim to Polygamy— A Divorce for Ten 
 Dollars !— Pin-Money for Brother Brigham's Wives — Four Husbands of a 
 Girl of Twenty-One !— How will the Knot be Untied ? - - - - 378 
 
 CHAPTER XXVIII. 
 
 WHAT WOMEN SUFFER IN POLYGAMY: — THE STORY OF MARY BURTON. 
 
 A Surprise — Meeting an Old Friend — The Traces of Grief — Mary in Trouble 
 — Sympathy — " There is No Help !" — Painful Memories — The Remem- 
 brance of a Dead Love — " He Used to Almost Worship You " — " It 
 Changed Him Altogether" — " How can we Help Ourselves ?" — Living up 
 to his Privileges — The Time for Beginning Polygamy — That Promise ! — 
 A Wife's Prayers Refused — The System a Fearful Curse — Dangerous to 
 Talk !— " Is the Child Dead ?"— His whole Nature Altered— Mary's Little 
 Girl -Frantic with Sorrow — "Not Much to make. Them Happy" — A Mis- 
 erable Resource — A Sad Story of Wifely Sorrow — How Elder Shrewsbury 
 Kept his Promise to his Wife — " She shall Believe" — Marrying two Sis- 
 ters on the Same Day — Memories of Other Days. ..... 393 
 
 CHAPTER XXIX. 
 
 HOW MARRIAGES ARE MADE IN UTAH — A NEW WIFE FOUND FOR MY 
 
 HUSBAND. 
 
 My 014 Friend Madame Baliff— Painful Reverses of Fortune— Shameful 
 " Counsel" during the " Reformation"— A Choice of Two Evils— Remi- 
 niscences of a Happier Life— A Message from Brigham Young— A Seri- 
 ous Trust— An Interesting Case— Suffering for the Faith— My Talkative 
 Friend Again -I Receive Strange Congratulations— An Inquisitive Lady 
 —A Lady who Could "Build-Up" a Rebellious Wife— The Apostle 
 Hcber C. Kimliall Pays Me a Special Visit—" Plenty of Wives around 
 the Town"— A Morning Drive with the "Model Saint"— A Lesson on 
 Children's Dresses— Good " Counsel" thrown Away— Heber Suggests a 
 Wife for my Husband— How Love is Developed in Mormon Wives— 
 " The Finest Thing In the World"— The Shadow of Coming Evil. - . 40S 
 
CONTENTS. ;j3fy 
 
 CHAPTER XXX. 
 
 TAKING A SECOND WIFE ; — THE EXPERIENCE OF THE FIRST. 
 
 A Mysterious Errand— Going a Courting— Silence and Obedience, a Wife's 
 Duty— Kept in the Darlc— Mistaken Kindness— The Conflict between 
 Faith and Reason— A " Rebellious Woman"— My Poor Friend Carrie — 
 Women Advocating Polygamy— Finding a Wife for My Husband— The 
 Poor Victim— An Unusually Loving Husband— A Consultation with 
 Brother Brigham— The Curse of a whole Life— The Fiat of the Prophet 
 —The Penalties of Disobedience—" I Can Only Consent"— A Message 
 from Eliza R. Snow— The Bad Logic of the Poetess— An Unwilling Sac- 
 rifice — An Unalterable Decision, -•■•.... ^20 
 
 CHAPTER XXXI. 
 
 TRIALS — THE SECOND WIFE CHOSEN — SHADOWS OF LIFE. 
 
 A List of Eligible Young Ladies— Making a Selection — Asking the First 
 Wife's Consent— My Husband's Bride Elect — Watching a Husband's 
 Wooing — " Her Little Day of Triumph" — Another Victim to the Heavenly 
 " Order" — The Important Claims of Love— Reminiscences of a First 
 Love — Submissive to the Faith — A Man Cannot Love Two at One Time 
 —A Very Youthful Bride— A " Very Painful Task"— A Long Courtship 
 — Bearing, the Cross — A Visit from my Husband's Bride-Elect — Belinda — 
 Carrie Grant's Illness — Divulging a Secret — " Love me One Day Longer" 
 — The Approach of Death — A Strange Promise for a Wife to Give — I 
 Choose a Wife for my Husband — Carrie's Last Hours — " It is Better So" 
 — A Sacred Pledge — My Last Visit to Carrie — A Sad Farewell. - • 433 
 
 CHAPTER XXXII. 
 
 MARRIAGE FOR THE DEAD — ENTERING INTO POLYGAMY — THE NEW WIFE. 
 
 Memories of My Poor Friend Carrie — The Last Untroubled Sleep — Her 
 Hopes and Mine — Alone in the Night — A Mysterious "Presence" — "I 
 Plainly Saw Carrie Leaning Over Me"— The Wedding-Ring— " The 
 ' Presence' in the Room was Gone" — Troubled about the Ring — Beside 
 the Coffin of my Dead Friend — I Place the Ring on her Finger — My Hus- 
 band's Gift for Carrie—" He Considered it was only a Dream"— Waiting 
 for the Event— The Saddest Day of my Life— My Husband's Second Mar- 
 riage — I Give Away the Bride ! — Fulfilling my Promise — I am Married to 
 my Husband for Carrie — Brigham's Decree : The Claims of the Living 
 and the Dead— Married for Eternity— The Bride and Bridegroom— After 
 the Wedding— Loneliness and Grief— A Night of Darkness and Sorrow. 446 
 
XKVl CONTENTS. 
 
 CHAPTEIR XXXHI. 
 
 DOMESTIC ARRANGEMENTS Or THE SAINTS I^fOLYQAMY FROM A MfOMAN'« 
 
 STANDPOINT, 
 
 A First Wife's Experience in Polygamy—" Getting Used to It"— The Doings 
 and Devices of Polygamic Wives— How Mormon Men Deceive and are 
 Deceived— Feminine Drill-Sergeants— The Ladies who Advocate Poly- 
 gamy ! — A Present for Brother Brighain — Getting up a Petition — How 
 Signatures are Procured— Inscribing the Names of the Dead as Voters — 
 Cruel Efforts of JHopeless Wom^n— A Mormon Idea of a Husband's 
 Duty— The Domestic Arrangements of the Saints— A Man with Six 
 Wives-^How. he Divides his. Time— A.Crafty Proceeding— The Reward 
 of Generosity — Primitive Habitations — Polygamy in the Rough — The 
 Discarded Wife in the Wagon-Box—" Build up the Kingdom !" — Four 
 Wives and their Children jn One Room— Advantages of a Large House- 
 Wealthy Polygamists— Married to Two Sisters — Marrying a Step-Daugh- 
 ter — Managing a Husband — The Influence of Good Cookery — Wives in 
 Various Settlements— The Case Reversed : A Picture. .... 459 
 
 CHAPTER XXXIV. 
 
 LIGHTS AND SHADOWS OF POLYGAMY : — MARRIAGE AND BAPTISM FOR THE 
 
 DEAD. 
 
 Domestic Difficulties — Husband and Lover — How Brother Brigham Treats 
 His Wives — Polygamy in Poverty — Obedience the Crowning Virtue-r 
 How Women Feel and Act in Polygamy— A First Wife's Trials — The 
 Young Second Wife — Home Life in Polygamy — The Husband Displays 
 His "Jewels" — Our Worldy Prosperity— The First Daily Paper in Utah 
 — Whisperings of Murder — Not in the Confidence of " The Church" — 
 Brigham's Inconsistencies — Mr. Stenhouse Refuses a Contract — How 
 Brother Brigham " Jumps at an Offer" — How He Makes His Money — I 
 Remind My Husband of Certain Things — Another Visit from My Talka- 
 tive Friend — Baptism for the Dead^Baptized for Queen Anne — A Strange 
 Description of Paradise — Napoleon and Washington Mormon Elders — 
 Queen Elizabeth Enters into Polygamy — Becoming Proxy for Henry VIII. 
 — The Wife of the Thief on the Cross — Waiting for Queen Fanny 1 - 474 
 
 CHAPTER XXXV. 
 
 FESTIVITIES AND SOCIAL GATHERINGS OF THE SAINTS;— THE PROPHET'S 
 WHISKEY SHOP AND DRY-GOODS STORE. 
 
 An Absent Husband's " Kingdom"— A Suggestion— A Pleasant Time for a 
 Wife—" The Old Woman is Full of the Devil"— What I heard at the Pic- 
 
CONTENTS. kxvii. 
 
 Nics — A " Bishop" and his Pour Wives — Quite a Spectacle : The 
 
 " Woman in White !"— The " Peg" that " God Made for Brigham's Hat" 
 — Dancing afnong the Saints— How Balls and Social Parties are Conducted 
 , --rA Man Disgraced by following his Wife — Sad Fate of a Swedish Lady — 
 Life in a " Dug-Out" — Another Phase of Crf^rfai/ Marriage ! — A Wronged 
 Wife who Poisoned Herself — An Apostle's Five Wives ! — Doing a Kind- 
 ness for a Dead Uncle^-rMarryiijg four Wiye^ on the Same Day— The 
 Fish Brought in by Br6ther Brigham's Net— A Slumbering Conscience — 
 The Prophet's Theatre— The "Word of Wisdom"— Brigham Young's 
 Whiskey-making Establishment— The " Revelation" and the Five-Gallon 
 Keg— Why Brigham Sells Bad Whiskey— The Dry-Goods Store of "the 
 Prophet of the Lord." 493 
 
 CHAPTER XXXVI. 
 
 MY DAUGHTER BECOMES THE FOURTH WIFE OF BRIGHAM YOUNG'S SON— ^ 
 THE SECOND ENDOWMENTS. 
 
 Learning More of the Irmer Life — The Mistakes of Newspaper Correspond- 
 ents in Utah — Looking through Mormon Spectacles — Kept in the Dark— 
 The Second Wif§ Begins Pous.ekeeping — Getting Rid of Hert — My 
 Clara's Lover — Joseph A. Young — The Engagement — Waiting for 
 " Something" to Turn Up — Asking Permission to Go East — How Mor- 
 mon Girls are Deceived and Deceive Themselves — Brother Brigham 
 " Counsels" Brother Stenhouse — The Wedding Day Fixed — The Marriage 
 Ceremony in the Endowment-House — Brother Brigham Officiates — Mar- 
 , ried for Time and for All Eternity — The Fourth Wife of a Polygamist — 
 A Mother's Sorrow — We Receive our Second Endowments — " Our'' Hus- 
 band Anointed King and Priest — Belinda and Myself made Queens apd 
 Priestesses — A Little Stranger : The Second Wife's Baby — " The Cooclu- 
 sion of the Whole Matter." •. 506 
 
 CHAPTER XXXVII. 
 
 REALITIES OF POLYGAMIC LIFE: — ORSON PRATT: THE STORY OF HIS YOUNG 
 
 ENGLISH WIFE. 
 
 Peculiar Position of Plural Wiwes — The Troubles of a Pretty Young Welsh 
 Girl- The Story of Orson Pratt and His Young Wife— The " Champion 
 of Polygamy" — The Wife of an Apostle — Leaving a Mother and her 
 Babes to Starve — The Neglected Wife — Destitute and Forsaken — At- 
 tacked by Fever — The Wretched Wife Loses her Senses — She Wanders 
 Forth Upon the Prairie with her Babes — The Good Deeds of Brother Kel- 
 sey and his Wife— They Clothe and Feed the Poor, Wife— The "Philos- 
 opher" and his dying Wife — He Takes Matters Comfortably — " It is Too 
 Late, Orson ; Too Late !" Another Victim to Polygamy — How a Wife% 
 
Xxviii CONTENTS. 
 
 Rocking-chair was Stolen-How a Good Brother Whipped His Little 
 Wife— Whence Come the Elders' WiVes— Dupes from the Old World— 
 " Gone East !"— His other " Home"— The Advent of Three Little Babies 
 —Why I Blame those Men. • . - • 5*9 
 
 CHAPTER XXXVIII. 
 
 «OUR" HUSBAND'S FIANCEE— A SECOND WIFE'S SORROWS— STEPS TOWARDS 
 
 APOSTACY. 
 
 A Little Misapprehension— My Husband's Kingdom— The chosen Maiden 
 —The Prophet's daughter, Zina- Reviewing a Lady-Love— A Strange 
 Consultation— The Accepted Lover— Love of no Ordinary Kind—" Some- 
 thing very Beautiful"—" He Never Loved Before"— Progressive Affection 
 —Why Zina Pitied Us—" Our Husband !"— Sorrows of a Second Wife : 
 Belinda in Trouble— A Pleasant " Duty !"— The Flirting in the Prophet's 
 Parlor— Wavering Faith— The "Revelation" Criticised- Homoeopathic 
 Religion— The Book of Mormon condemns Polygamy !— A very Question- 
 able " Prophet"— Belinda's Bereavement— Accused of Favoring the Gen- 
 tiles—Lover's Quarrels— A Long Courtship—" If One Girl Won't Another 
 Will !"— Steps Towards Apostacy. 535 
 
 CHAPTER XXXIX. 
 
 SOME CURIOUS COURTSHIPS — BRIGHAM RUINS OUR FORTUNES — BELINDA 
 DIVORCES "our" HUSBAND. 
 
 Some Curious Courtships — "The Nicest ole'oman in the Country!"-^" Be- 
 i.poke " Wives — Marrying in Haste — A Woman with Nine Husbands 
 ._A Difficult Question — The Autocrat of Utah — Reminding a Husband — 
 Accused of Favoring the Gentiles — The "Subjugation of Women" — 
 The Daily Telegraph in Trouble — Removing to Ogden — Brigham Young 
 Resolves to Ruin Us — A Crafty Prophet — The Ruin of Our Fortunes — 
 " It Makes Me a Free Man !" — " Our " Husband's Divorce — " Take 
 Care of That Paper " — Inside the Prophet's Office — Signing the Docu- 
 ment — A Curious Bill of Divorce — Belinda — Forming a Resolution — A 
 Sacrifice Worth Making. J48 
 
 CHAPTER XL. 
 
 MARY BURTON — LIFE'S JOURNEY ENDED: REST AT LAST. 
 
 Sent for in Haste — " Sister Mary had Taken Poison" — Mary's Troubles 
 
 Elder Shrewsbury's Wives — Removing to Salt Lake City — Domestic Life 
 
CONTENTS. Xxix 
 
 without Love— A Wife's Despair— A Divided Household— Seeking Sym- 
 pathy — The forsaken Wife— The change which Polygamy produced in a 
 husband — Comforting a heartbroken Wife — Dark Thoughts — Waiting 
 for the End — Mary attempts to destroy Herself — A Painful Story — 
 Heartless conduct of Elder Shrewsbury — A Wife's Curse — Shadows of 
 the Night— Broken-Hearted — The Little Medicine. Chest— A fatal Potion 
 — Elder Shrewsbury visits his dying Wife — " What a Curse was therfil" 
 —With my dying Friend— Life's Journey Ended— Rest at last ■ • 561 
 
 CHAPTER XLI. 
 
 MY HUSBAND DISFELLOTKSHIPPED — WE APOSTATISE — BRUTAL OUrSAGB UPON 
 MY HUSBAND AND MYSELF. 
 
 A Crisis — Effects of Superstition and Blind Obedience — Questioning Brother 
 Brigham's Authority — The Faithful are " Counselled " Against My Hus- 
 band — The School of the Prophets — Arbitrary Measures — My Husband 
 is Disfellpwshipped— " I Will Be Free ! "—The Breaking of Bonds— 
 The Day of Liberty— Asking to be "Cut Off" from the Church— A 
 Brutal Outrage Upon My Husband and Myself — The Secret Police — Who 
 Were the Guilty ? — How the Bodies of Murdered Men are "Discovered 1" 
 —The Fate of Apostates — Carrying Out the Teachings of Brigham — 
 Who Ought to be Blamed— What an lU-Treated Wife Told Me— Brig- 
 ham's Explanation — He Accuses Belinda's Brothers — How Crimes Are 
 Explained Away — Why Brigham Withdrew an Offered Reward — What 
 People Dared Not Say. jy6 
 
 CHAPTER XLII.' 
 
 AMUSING TROUBLES OF MY TALKATIVE FRIEND — CHARLOTTE WITH THB 
 
 GOLDEN HAIR ! 
 
 Another Visit from my Talkative Friend — A preliminary Fuss — " The pic-i 
 ture of Despair?" — He did it on Purpose — "That little Shrimp of a 
 Girl"— Her red hair : "Charlotte's hair is Golden P'— A Little Hasty 1— 
 An Object of Interest — "My husband is a- Man" — "You can't calculate 
 a Man " — A nice Question of Privilege — Rather too much to Manage — 
 A nice Young Woman of Thirty-Five or so ! — Stout in Proportion — Old 
 enough to be his Grandmother, and Squinted — Getting used to a pro- 
 posed Bride — Watching a Truant Husband — Not the least Jealous ? — A 
 curious kind of Church-Meeting l^— Keeping up his Dignity — "Enjoying 
 themselves without me ! " — A little " Unpleasantness " — Charlotte's 
 Scratched Face — She didn't like such " Accidents " — " My Henry and 
 that Girl ! " — Millinery and Prayers — Bringing a Husband to Reason — 
 Wife against Wife — Too busy to Apostatise. ...... 585 
 
XJCX CONTENTS, 
 
 CHAPTER XLIII. 
 
 AFTHl WE LEFT THE CHURCH — INTERESTING FACTS AND FIGURES — THK 
 WfORMONISM AND MORMONS OF TO-DAY. 
 
 Aftei' We Left the Church— Beginning Life Afresh— The Coldness of Our 
 'FormerJ"riends?— Disposing of the Daily Telegraph— How Fuller Flour- 
 ished : Ran a. Paper and Ran Away — Our New Position — My Husband 
 Goes East — Effects of the "New Movement" — "Zion's Co-operative 
 Mercantile Institution" — Brigham's Store — " Country-folks Seeking After 
 a Sign "—An Old Lady's Stock in the " Coop "—A Pound and a half of 
 Nails !— The " Order of Enoch "—The Crowning Swindle !— The Very 
 
 ; Vilest Slavery of All — How Reporters and Visitors are Fooled by Brig- 
 ham — ^The Ladies' Petitions — Legalising the Marriage of Children ! — 
 The Franchise Conferred on Mormon Women — How Unanimously they 
 Vote!— The Ballot Farce in Utah— How they Allowed the Mules to 
 Vote ! — Finery versus Faith — The Position in Utah To-day — The Apostacy 
 of Brother Brigham's Son — Some Singular Statistics — Undoing the Past; ,598 
 
 L'ENVOI. 6it 
 
CHAPTER I. 
 
 MY EARLY LIFE. 
 
 The Memory of my Youthful Days — Early Religious Impressions — I become " a 
 Church-Member — MyPious Admirer — A brief Homily on Feminine Vanities 
 — My first Start in Life — Faithful Counsels of a Friend — Life in a French 
 School' — The Maison-Martin — Preparing my Lessons — Objecting to a Prot- 
 estant — "Assisting" at Service — My Ghostly Adviser — The "instructions" 
 of a Handsome Young Priest — Flirtation and Apostolic Succession — The Blind 
 Leading the Blind — The Scene of Labor Changed — Domestic life at St. Brieux — 
 An indifferent Young Gentleman — The Presence of an "Icicle " — Quiet Atten- 
 tions to " Mademoiselle-Miss " — The Man who waits Wins — My Affianced 
 Lover — Reasons why a French girl Marries — Views of Marriage among the 
 French — Traces of Early Teachings — Mental Struggles and Doubts — I Resolve 
 to Visit England — The Crisis of my Life. 
 
 THE story which I propose to tell in these pages is a 
 plain, unexaggerated record of facts which have come 
 immediately under my own notice, or which I have myself 
 personally experienced. 
 
 Much that to the reader may seem altogether incredible, 
 would to a Mormon mind appear simply a matter of ordinary 
 ^very-day occurrence with which everyone in Utah is sup- 
 posed to be perfectly familiar. The reader must please remem- 
 ber that I am not telling — as so many writers have told in 
 newspaper correspondence and sensational stories — the hasty 
 and incorrect statements and opinions gleaned during a short 
 visit to Salt Lake City ; but my own experience — the story of 
 a faith, strange, wild, and terrible it may be, but which was 
 once so intimately enwoven with all my associations that it 
 became a part of my very existence itself ; and facts, the too 
 true reality of which there are living witnesses by hundreds 
 and even thousands who could attest if only they would. 
 
32 DAYS OF CHILDHOOD. 
 
 With the reader's permission I shall briefly sketch my 
 e^cperience from the very beginning. 
 
 I was born in the year 1829, in St. Hehers, Jersey — one of 
 the islands of the English Channel. 
 
 From my earliest recollection I was favorably disposed to 
 religious influences, and when only fourteen years of age I 
 became a member of the Baptist Church, of which my father 
 and mother were also members. With the simplicity and 
 enthusiasm of youth I was devoted to the religious faith of 
 the denomination to which I had attached' myself, and sought 
 to live in a manner which should be acceptable to God. 
 
 My childhood passed away without the occurrence of any 
 events which would be worthy of mention, although, of course, 
 my mind was even then receiving that religious bias which 
 afterwards led me to adopt the faith of the Latter-day Saints. 
 Like most girls in their teens I had a natural love of dress — 
 a weakness, if such it be, of the sex generally. I was not 
 extravagant, for that I could not be ; but thirty years ago 
 members of .dissenting churches were more staid in their 
 dress and demeanor and were less of the world, I think, than 
 they are to-day. In plainness of dress the Methodists and 
 Baptists much resembled the Quakers. My girlish weakness 
 caused me to be the subject of many a reprimand from older 
 church-members, who were rather strict in their views, I 
 well remember one smooth-faced, pious, corpulent brother 
 who was old enough to be my father, saying to me one day : 
 " My dear young sister, were it not for your love of dress, I 
 have seriously thought that I would some day make you my' 
 wife." I wickedly resolved that if a few bright colored rib- 
 bons would disgust my pious admirer, it should not be my 
 fault if he still continued to think of me. But many of our 
 other church-members were more lenient. Our good minister 
 in'particular bore with my childish imperfections, as he said, on 
 account of my youth and inexperience ; and later still, when I 
 was ready to leave my native island, an extra ribbon or a 
 fashionable dress had not affected my standing in the Baptist 
 denomination. 
 
MY LIFE IN FRANCE. 33 
 
 I mention these trifles, not because I attach any import- 
 ance to them in themselves, but because similar religious 
 tendencies and a devotional feeling were almost universally 
 found to be the causes which induced men and women to join 
 the Mormon Church. From among Roman Catholics, who 
 place unquestioning confidence in their priesthood, and also 
 from among persons predisposed to iniidelity, came few, if 
 any, converts to Mormonism. But it was from among the 
 religiously inclined — the Evangelical Protestants of the Old 
 World that the greater number of proselytes came. 
 
 But to return to my story. I was one of the younger mem- 
 bers of a large family ; and when I thought of the future I 
 , readily saw. that if I desired a position in life I should have to 
 make it for myself ; and this I resolved to do. I began by 
 consulting all my friends who I thought would be able to 
 counsel or assist me in carrying out my determination ; and 
 before long I found the opportunity which I sought. An 
 English lady, the wife of a captain in the British army, to 
 whom I had confided my aspirations, proposed — although I 
 was not yet fifteen years of age — to take me with her to 
 France, in the temporary capacity of governess to her chil- 
 dren, assuring me at the same time that she would advance 
 my interests in every possible way after our arrival. 
 
 This lady and her husband were as kind to me as my own 
 parents could have been ; and soon after our arrival in France 
 they procured for me a situation in one of the best schools in 
 St. Brieux, called the Maison-Martin, where, young as I was, I 
 engaged myself to teach the young ladies fancy-needlework and 
 embroidery, as well as to give lessons in English. Some of 
 the elder girls, I soon found, were further advanced in fancy- 
 needlework and some other matters than I was myself. This, 
 of course, I did not tell them ; but to supply my deficiency I 
 ' spent many a midnight hour in study and in preparing myself 
 to give the advanced instructions which would be required by 
 my pupils on the following day. For some time after I began 
 my work as teacher in that, school, I spent the whole of my 
 salary in paying for private lessons to keep me in advance of 
 3 
 
34 "instructing" a protestant. 
 
 my pupils. It was for awhile a severe task and a strain upon 
 my youthful energies ; but I have never since regretted it, as 
 it gave an impulse to my mind that has remained with me 
 through lifei 
 
 I had not been more than six months in my situation when 
 the parents of one of the pupils objected to the school retain- 
 ing a Protestant teacher, and I was consequently given to 
 understand that unless I consented to be instructed, if nothing 
 more, in the Roman Catholic faith, I could not remain in my 
 present position. This was my first experience of that relig- 
 ious intolerance of which I afterwards saw so much. The 
 principal of the establishment, however, being very kindly 
 disposed towards me, advised me to submit, and it -was finally 
 agreed that I should be allowed twelve months for instruction 
 and consideration. 
 
 During this probationary year I attended mass every 
 morning from seven to eight o'clock, and was present at 
 vespers at least three times a week. Every Saturday morn- 
 ing I accompanied my pupils to the confessional, where I had 
 to remain from seven o'clock till noon ; after which we 
 returned to breakfast. On Sundays there was the usua:l 
 morning mass, and after that high mass ; and in the afternoon, 
 from two to four, we listened to a sermon. In addition to all 
 these services, at which I was expected to " assist," a very 
 good-looking, interesting young priest was appointed to attend 
 to the spiritual instruction of the young Protestant, as they 
 called me, after school hours. He saw me frequently, but he 
 was ill-qualified to instruct me in the Catholic , faith or to 
 remove my doubts, for he was not himself too happy in the 
 sacerdotal robe. At first he aimed at convincing me that the 
 apostolic priesthood vested in the Fishermen of Galilee had 
 descended in unbroken succession in the Church of Rome ; 
 but he seemed to me much more inclined for a flirtation than 
 for argument ; I thought I could at times discover something 
 of regret on his own part at having taken holy orders; and in 
 after years I heard, that he had abandoned his profession. 
 
 To the numerous stories of Catholic oppression and arti- 
 
MY NEW POSITION. 35 
 
 fice in undermining Protestants and seducing them from their 
 faith, I cannot add my own testimony. Those among whom 
 I lived very naturally desired that I should be instructed in 
 their religion and join the church to which they belonged ; 
 but their bearing towards me was ever kind and respectful ; 
 although when the twelve months of probation had expired, 
 I found myself as much attached to the religion of my child- 
 hood as ever, and had in consequence to resign my situa- 
 tion. I had made many warm friends in the school, and none 
 were kinder to me than the principal, who proved her attach- 
 ment by finding*for me a lucrative situation in a wealthy 
 private family. 
 
 My new position was a decided advance in social life. The 
 family consisted of husband and wife, two children, the hus- 
 band's brother, and an elderly uncle. The husband was a 
 wealthy commoner. The lady by birth was of the noblesse, 
 but poor. The guardians of the titled lady had formed a mat- 
 rimonial alliance for her by advertisement, and, fortunately 
 for them, when the husband and wife first saw each other, 
 they loved — an experience not too commoji in France. The 
 fruits of this marriage were happiness and two sweet little 
 girls, who were, when I first knew them, of the ages of five 
 and seven years respectively. The young gentleman alluded 
 to — the husband's brother-^had been educated for the church, 
 but when the proper time came had refused to take orders ; 
 the uncle was a fine old gentleman, a retired general in the 
 French army and a bachelor. Altogether they formed as 
 happy a domestic circle as I had ever kno-\pi. The position 
 which I occupied among them was that of governess and 
 English teacher to the two little girls. 
 
 My young charges during the first year made rapid pro- 
 gress, which was very gratifying to the family and secured for 
 me their good-will and interest. Had I been their nearest 
 relative I could not have received more respect and consider- 
 ation from thfem. One member of the circle alone seemed to 
 be entirely indifferent to my presence ; this was the brother 
 of Monsieur De Bosque. Though I had lived in the same 
 
3<5 A PRESENT FOR "MADEMOISELLE-MISS." 
 
 house with him a whole year, and had sat at the same table 
 every day, scarcely a word had ever passed between us beyond 
 a formal salutation. 
 
 The young gentleman was very handsome, and when con- 
 versing with others his manner was extremely fascinating. I 
 did not believe that I particularly desired his attentions, but 
 his indifference annoyed me — ^for I had never before been 
 treated with such coldness, and I determined to become as 
 frigid and formal as he could possibly be himself. This for- 
 mal acquaintanceship continued for two years, and I per- 
 suaded myself that I had become altogether indifferent to the 
 presence of my icicle, while at the same time all the other 
 members of the family increased in their manifestations of 
 attachment to me. 
 
 But trifles often possess a great significance. It was the 
 custom of the family to get up a little lottery once a week for 
 the children, if my report of their deportment and progress 
 was favorable. In this lottery were presents of books, toys, 
 gloves, and a variety of fancy articles, and among them there 
 was sure to be a bouquet of choice flowers for " Mademoiselle- 
 Miss," as they familiarly called me. I knew not positively 
 whom to thank, although I instinctively felt from whom they 
 came, for the other members of the family always made me 
 more useful presents. In time one little attention led to 
 another, until at the end of three years I found myself the 
 fianc6e of the wealthy Constant De Bosque. Then — or rather 
 shortly before — he avowed that he had been silently watching 
 me all those yean^. 
 
 Madame De Bosque was opposed to my marriage with her 
 brother-in-law, as she desired that he should marry one of her 
 own wealthy cousins of the old noblesse of France. She 
 treated me, notwithstanding, with great kindness and confined 
 her opposition to persuading me not to listen to her brother's 
 suit ; but finding opposition to his wishes ineffectual, she 
 finally consented to our engagement, which took place in the 
 following winter. 
 
 From what I observed of the relations which existed be- 
 
ENGAGED. 37 
 
 tween husbands and wives in France, I did not feel perfectly 
 happy in the thought of becoming the wife of a Frenchman, 
 although I dearly loved the French people. Several of my 
 young lady acquaintances, I knew, had married because it was 
 fashionable, and especially because it was an emancipation 
 from what ladies in the higher ranks of society regarded as a 
 severe social restraint. It was considered shocking for any 
 young lady to be seen talking to a young gentleman in the 
 street ; indeed it was hardly proper for any unmarried girl to 
 be seen in the street at all without a bonne or some married 
 lady to accompahy her. But immediately she was married 
 she was at liberty to flirt and promenade with all the gentle- 
 men of her acquaintance, while her husband enjoyed the 
 same liberty among the ladies. This state of affairs did not 
 at all coincide with my English ideas, for to me the very 
 thought of marriage was invested with the most sacred obli- 
 gations, and I knew I should never be able to bring my mind 
 to accept less from my husband than I should feel it my duty 
 to render to him. 
 
 I loved the French people, and was pleased with their polite 
 mannerism, but I was not French in character ; and though 
 the prospect before me of an alliance with a wealthy and 
 noble family was certainly pleasant, and I was greatly attached 
 to vclj fiancde, my mind was considerably agitated upon the sub- 
 ject of marriage, as it had before been occupied with religion. 
 
 During my sojourn in France I had frequently questioned 
 myself whether I had not done wrong in remaining absent for 
 so many years from my home and from communion with the 
 church of my childhood, and I had always looked forward to 
 the time when I should return to them again. To this occa- 
 sional self-examination was now added another cause of anxi- 
 •ety, produced by the thought of marriage with a person of a 
 ■different faith. Marriage, to me, was the all-important event 
 in a woman's life, and some mysterious presentiment seemed 
 to forewarn me that marriage in my life was to be more than 
 an ordinary episode — though little did I then dream that it 
 would have a polygamic shaping. 
 
38 THE FINGER OF DESTINY DRAWS ME ON. 
 
 My young ambition alone had led me to France. I had 
 aspired to an honorable social position, and had found both it 
 and also devoted friends. Sometimes I felt that I could not 
 relinquish what I had gained ; at other times I yearned for 
 the associations of my childhood and the guiding hand of 
 earlier friends. The conflict in my mind was often painful. 
 My early prejudices and the teachings of those around me 
 induced me to believe that the Roman Catholic religion was 
 entirely wrong; yet, notwithstanding, while living among 
 Catholics I saw nothing to condemn in their personal lives, 
 but much to the contrary. In fact, Romanism fascinated me, 
 while it failed to convince my judgment. 
 
 While laboring under these conflicting sentiments, I re- 
 solved to visit my native land, to consult with my parents 
 about my contemplated marriage ; and for that purpose I 
 asked and obtained two months' vacation. Surely some mys- 
 terious destiny must have been drawing me to England at 
 that particular crisis, and before the fulfilling of my engage- 
 ment, which would have changed so entirely the whole cur- 
 rent of my existence. 
 
CHAPTER II. 
 
 MY FIRST INTRODUCTION TO MORMONISM. 
 
 Returning Home—" Au Revoir'^—K visit to Jersey— The Home of my Child- 
 hood—My First Introduction to Mormonism — An " Apostate's " View of the 
 Saints— Revelation and Roguery— A Matter of Personal Interest— A Lady's 
 Logifc — A Warning against the New Religion— First Visit to a Mormon Meet- 
 ing—Catching the " Mormon Fever "—Snubbing an Elder— A Polite Saint- 
 Fighting a Delusion— Among Dear Friends—" Full of the Spirit"- Religion 
 in Practical Life — Preparing Comforts for the Missionary Elders — Emotional 
 Religion — The Testimony of the Spirit — Sunday Service among the Saints — 
 Contagious Enthusiasm — The Story of a Too-confiding Convert — How He 
 Went out to Zion — Terrible Fate of an Apostate — Killed by " the Indians " — 
 Preaching under Difficulties — My First Introduction to my Future Husband — 
 " The Other Daughter from France " — The Eloquence of Elder Stenhouse — 
 Creating an Impression — A Memorable Era in My Life. 
 
 DURING my residence in France, my parents had left St. 
 Heliers and returned to Southampton, England. To 
 visit them now I had to take a sailing vessel from Portrieux 
 to the Isle of Jersey, and thence I could take the steamer to 
 Southampton. 
 
 Monsieur and Madame De Bosque, together with the two 
 little girls, accompanied me in their private carriage to Por- 
 trieux, a distance of forty miles, in order to confide me safely 
 to the captain's care. As they wished me " bon voyage " and 
 embraced me affectionately, Mons. De Bosque handed me a 
 valuable purse for pocket-money during my absence, and they 
 all exhibited great anxiety for my welfare, saying over and 
 over again au revoir, as they entered their carriage to return 
 to their happy home ; — thereby implying that this was not a 
 final adieu, but that we should soon meet again. 
 
 I cannot tell why it was, but I experienced at that moment a 
 painful feeling of mental indecision about the future. I had no 
 
40 THE MEMORY OF CHILDHOOD'S HOURS. 
 
 real reason to doubt my return to France and the certainty of a 
 warm welcome when I should again greet those dear ones who 
 were now leaving me in tears ; but my mind was troubled by 
 a vague feeling of uncertainty which made me anything but 
 happy. Filial affection and a sense of duty drew me towards 
 my parents in England ; while a feeling of gratitude, and, I 
 think, another and more tender sentiment, turned the current 
 of my thoughts towards the happy home at St. Brieux. 
 
 It was not necessary for me to stop in Jersey for more than 
 a few hours, but I wanted to revisit the scenes of my child- 
 hood's happy days and to speak again with those whom I had 
 known and loved in early life. In later years the scenes and 
 memories of childhood seem like the imaginings of a pleasant 
 dream. A sweet charm is thrown around all that we then 
 said and did ; and the men and women who then were known 
 to us are pictured in our recollection as beings possessing 
 charms and graces such as never belonged to the common- 
 place children of earth. The glamour of a fairy wand is over 
 all the past history of mankind ; but upon nothing does it 
 cast so potent a spell as upon the personal reminiscences of 
 our own infant years. To me that little island had charms 
 which no stranger could ever have discovered ; and even now 
 after the lapse of so many long, eventful years I often feel an 
 earnest wish to visit again those rock-bound shores', to listen 
 to the everlasting murmur of the wild, wild waves, to watch 
 the distant speck-like vessels far away upon the swelling 
 ocean, and to drink in the invigorating breezes which seem to 
 give life and energy to every pulsation of the living soul. 
 
 But I must not theorise : life has been to me too earnest 
 and too painful to admit of much sentiment or fancy as I re- 
 call the past. Little as I thought it, during the short visit 
 which I paid to my birthplace, the web of destiny was being 
 woven for me in a way which I could not then have conjec- 
 tured even in a dream. 
 
 At St. Heliers I heard for the first time of the Latter-day 
 Saints, or Mormonites, as they were more familiarly called ; 
 but I cannot express how perfectly astonished I was when I 
 
SERVANTS OF THE EVIL ONE. 41 
 
 learned that my father, mother, sisters, and one of my bro- 
 thers had been converted to the new faith. 
 
 It was my own brother-in-law who told me this. He him- 
 self, with my sister, were " Apostate " Mormons. They had 
 been baptized into the Mormon Church, but became dissatis- 
 fied and abandoned it. The St. Heliers' branch of the Latter- 
 day Saints had had a turbulent experience. Their first teach- 
 ings had been a mixture of Bible texts about the last days, 
 and arguments about the millennium, the return of the Jews 
 to Palestine, the resurrection of the dead, and a new revel- 
 ation and a new pr<?f)het ; but the improper conduct of some 
 of the elders had disgusted the people with their doctrines, 
 and the tales of wickedness which I heard were, if true, 
 certainly sufficient to justify them in rejecting such in- 
 structors. 
 
 The more I heard of this strange religion the more I was 
 troubled ; yet, as I knew my parents were devoted Christians, 
 I could hardly believe that Mormonism was such a vile delu- 
 sion and imposture as it had been represented to me, or they 
 would never have accepted it : still it was possible that they 
 had been led astray by the fascinations of a new religion. 
 
 In this state of mind I met in the street the wife of the 
 Baptist minister whom I have already mentioned. She 
 greeted me affectionately and then began a.t once to warn me 
 against the Latter-day Saints. I enquired what she knew of 
 them, and she replied that personally she knew nothing, but 
 she believed them to be servants of the Evil One, adding, 
 " There is a strange power with them that fascinates the peo- 
 ple and draws them into their meshes in spite of themselves. 
 Let me entreat you not to go near them. Do not trust 
 yourself at one of their meetiiigs, or the delusion will take 
 hold oiyou too." 
 
 " I cannot ignore Mormonism in this way," I said, " or pass 
 it by with indifference, for my parents ,whom I tenderly love 
 have been blinded by this delusion, and I can do no less than 
 investigate its teachings thoroughly, and expose its errors, and, 
 if possible, save my father's family from ruin." 
 
42 CATCHING THE MORMON FEVER. 
 
 She' was not convinced that this was the wisest course for 
 me to pursue, but I resolved at once to attend a meeting of 
 the Saints and judge for myself. My brother-in-law, when he 
 heard of my intentions, tried to dissuade me, but, finding 
 me determined, finally offered to escort me to the meeting- 
 place. 
 
 What I heard on this occasion made a great impression on 
 my mind, and set me thinking as I had never thought before. 
 On returning to my sister's house she asked me what opinion I 
 had now formed of the Latter-day Saints. I replied that I had 
 not yet formed any conclusion, but that what I had heard had 
 given me serious cause for reflection. " Oh," she said, " You 
 have caught the Mormon fever, I see." 
 
 I felt a disposition to resent this implication, but I was half 
 afraid that, after all, my sister was right. Much that I had 
 heard could, I knew, be proved true from Scripture ; and the 
 rest seemed to me to be capable of demonstration from the 
 same authority. I resolved, however, to fortify myself 
 against a too easy credulity, and thought that probably if 
 I heard more of these doqtrines I might be able to discover 
 their falsity. 
 
 On the following day, the elder who had preached at the 
 meeting, and who, by the way, is one of the present propri- 
 etors of the Salt Lake Herald, called to see me, as he had 
 been intimate with my parents before they left the island. I 
 hardly knew how to be civil to him, though he had done no- 
 thing to offend me, nor had he been the cause of my parents 
 entering the Mormon Church ; but I disliked him solely on 
 account, of the stories which I had heard about the Mormons. 
 Intending only to be kind to me, he told me that on the fol- 
 lowing day he proposed to take the steamer for Southampton, 
 as he was going to attend a conference of the Saints in Lon- 
 don, and that he should be pleased to shew me any attentions 
 while crossing the Channel, and would see me safe home in 
 England. I confess I really felt insulted at a Mormon Elder 
 offering to be my escort ; and although my trunks were 
 iready packed for my departure by the same steamer, and Mr. 
 
AFRAID TO TRUST MYSELF. 43 
 
 Dunbar knew it, I thanked him politely but said I would not 
 go by that boat. He tried to persuade me to change my 
 mind and said that I should have to wait a whole week for an- 
 , other vessel ; and at last I frankly told him the abhorrence I 
 felt at the things I had heard about the Mormons, and that I 
 should be afraid to travel in the same steamer with him or any 
 of the Mormon Elders who I regarded as no better than so 
 many whited sepulchres. He, however, very kindly took no 
 offence for he knew that I had been listening to those who 
 disliked the Saints. I felt ashamed at having been betrayed 
 into such unladylike fudeness, but, notwithstanding, tried to 
 persuade myself that his civility was, after all, an insult ; for I 
 had conceived a detestation of every Mormon, on account of the 
 deception which I felt sure had been practiced upon my family. 
 
 This feeling was not lessened by the consciousness that an 
 impression had been made upon my own mind. The more in 
 accordance with Scripture the teaching of the Elders appeared, 
 the more firmly I believed it must be a powerful delusion. 
 Here, I said, Satan has indeed taken the form of an angel of 
 light to deceive, if possible, the very elect. 
 
 Elder Dunbar finding me unyielding, left by the next 
 steamer and had a pleasant passage across the Channel, and I 
 remained on the island another week. During that interval 
 my mind was haunted with what I had heard of this new gos- 
 pel dispensation, as it was called. That angels had again 
 descended from heaven to teach men upon earth ; that a pro- 
 phet had been raised up to speak again the mind of the Lord 
 to the children of men ; that the Saints were partakers of the 
 gifts of the Spirit, as in the Early Christian Church, — all these 
 assumed facts took the form of reality, and came back into 
 my mind with greater force every time I strove to drive them 
 away; just as our thoughts do when we desire to sleep, and 
 cannot — our very efforts to dismiss them bring them back 
 with greater force to torment us. 
 
 We had an unusually bad passage across the Channel, 
 which annoyed me all the more when I remembered my 
 scornful refusal to go in the same boat with Elder Dunbar. 
 
44 THE FULNESS OF THE EVERLASTING. GOSPEL. 
 
 On my arrival in Southampton I soon discovered that my 
 father, mother, and sisters were full of the spirit of Mormon^; 
 ism. They were rejoicing in it, ardently believing that it 
 was the fulness of the everlasting gospel, as the elders styled; 
 it ; and whatever I might think of the new religion I was 
 forced to confess that it brought into my father's house peace, 
 lov6) kindness, and charity such as were seldom seen in many' 
 households of religious people. My sisters were completely 
 changed in their manner of life. They cared nothing for the, 
 amusements which girls of their age usually crave and enjoy. 
 Their whole thoughts seemed to be occupied with the Church, 
 attending the meetings of the saints, and employing every 
 leisure hour in preparing comforts for the Elders who were 
 traveUing and preaching without purse and scrip. And in all 
 this they were as happy as children. 
 
 Of my parents I might say the same. My dear mother re- 
 joiced in the belief that she had been peculiarly blessed in 
 being privileged to live at a time when " the last dispensa- 
 tion " was revealed ; and my father, though an invalid, rejoiced 
 that he had entered into the kingdoin by baptism. Such was 
 the condition of my father's house ; and who can wonder that, 
 accustomed as I was to listen with respect to the opinions of 
 my parents, I was more than ever troubled about the new re- 
 ligion which they had adopted. 
 
 The first Sunday morning that I was in England, my 
 parents asked me to accompany them to meeting, and I read- 
 ily complied, as I wanted to hear more of the strange doc- 
 trines which in some mysterious way had made our family so 
 happy, but which in other quarters had provoked such bitter 
 hostility. I know now that this joyousness of heart is not 
 peculiar to new converts to Mormonism, but may be found 
 among the newly-converted of every sect which allows the 
 emotional feelings to come into play. To me, at the time, 
 however, it was a mystery, but I must confess that the change 
 which had taken place in those nearest and dearest to me, 
 affecting me personally, and being so evidently in accordance 
 with the teachings of the Saviour, led me to regard Mormon- 
 
"zion's standard is unfurled." 45 
 
 ism with less antipathy. The bright side alone of the new 
 faith was presented to the world abroad ; we had yet to go to 
 Utah and witness the effects of Brigham Young's teachings 
 at home before we could know what Mormonism really was. 
 I shall never forget the trial it was to my pride to enter the 
 dirty, mean-looking room where the Saints assembled at that 
 time. No one would rent a respectable hall to them, and they 
 were glad to obtain the use of any place which was large 
 enough for their meetings. On the present occasion there 
 was a very fair gathering of people, who had come together 
 influenced by the mosfe varied motives. The Presiding Elder 
 — I should here remark that the word " Elder" has among the 
 Mormons no reference whatever to age, but is simply. a rank 
 in the priesthood — called the meeting to order, and read the 
 following hymn : 
 
 The morning breaks, the shadows flee ; 
 
 Lo ! Zion's standard is unfurled 1 
 The dawning of a brighter day 
 
 Majestic rises on the worlds 
 
 The clouds of error disappear 
 
 Before the rays of truth divine ; 
 The glory bursting from afar, 
 
 Wide o'er the nations soon will shine t 
 
 The Gentile fulness now comes in, 
 
 And Israel's blessings are at hand ; 
 Lo ! Judah's remnant, cleansed from sin, 
 
 Shall in the promised Canaan stand. 
 
 Angels from heaven and truth from earth 
 Have met, and both have record borne ; 
 
 Thus Zion's light is bursting forth 
 
 To bring her ransomed children home. 
 
 Every word of this h)min had a meaning peculiar to itself, 
 relating to the distinctive doctrines of the Saints. The con- 
 gregation sang with an energy and enthusiasm which made 
 the room shake again. Self and the outer world were alike 
 forgotten, and an ecstacy of rapture seemed to possess the 
 
46 THE MISSION OF ELDER STENHOUSE. 
 
 souls of all present. Then all kneeled down, and prayer was 
 offered for the Prophet, the apostles, high-priests, "seven- 
 ties," elders, priests, teachers, and deacons ; blessings were 
 invoked upon the Saints, and power to convert the Gentiles ; 
 and as the earnest words of supplication left the speaker's 
 lips, the congregation shouted a loud "Amen." 
 
 There was no prepared sermon. There never is at a Mor- 
 mon meeting. The people are taught that the Holy Ghost is 
 " mouth, matter, and wisdom." Whatever the preaching elder 
 may- say is supposed to come directly by inspiration from 
 heaven, and the Saints listening, as they believe, not to his 
 utterances but to the words of God Himself, have nothing to- 
 do but- to hear and obey. 
 
 The first speaker on this occasion was a young gentleman 
 of respectable family, who had been recently baptized and 
 ordained. He, too, was from St. Heliers, and I had known 
 him from childhood. His address impressed me very much. 
 He had been a member of the Baptist church, and he related 
 his experience, told how often he had wondered why there 
 were not inspired men to preach the glad tidings of salvation 
 to the world to-day, as there were eighteen centuries ago. 
 He spoke of the joy which he had experienced in being bap- 
 tized into the Mormon Church and realising that he had 
 received the " gift of the Holy Ghost." The simplicity with 
 which he spoke, his evident honesty, and the sacrifice he had 
 made in leaving the respectable Baptists and joining the 
 despised Mormons, were, I thought, so many evidences of his 
 sincerity. 
 
 Alas ! how little could that young preacher conjecture how 
 different the practical Mormonism in Utah was from the 
 theoretical Mormonism which he had learned to believe in 
 Europe, before polygamy was known among the Saints. A 
 short time afterwards he gave up his business, married an 
 accomplished young lady, and went with her to Salt Lake 
 City. There they were soon utterly disgusted with what they 
 witnessed, apostatized, and set out for England. When they 
 had gone three-fourths of their way back to the Missouri 
 
"A CERTAIN ELDER. 47 
 
 river, the young m^n, his wife, child, and another apostate 
 and his wife, were killed by "Indians:" — such,- at least, was 
 the report ; but dissenting Mormons have always charged 
 their " taking off " to the order of the leaders of the Mormon 
 Church. 
 
 But to return to the meeting. The reader must please for- 
 give me if I dwell a little upon the events of that particular 
 morning, for naturally they made a deep impression upon my 
 own mind — it was there that I saw for the first time my hus- 
 band who was to be. 
 
 I had heard a good deal about a certain elder, from my fam- 
 
 . ily and from the Saints who visited at our house. They spoke 
 
 with great enthusiasm of the earnestness with which he 
 
 preached, of the influence which his addresses produced, and 
 
 of his confidence in the final triumph of " the kingdom." 
 
 At that time — the summer of 1849 — although the branch 
 of the Mormon Church in Britain was in a most flourishing 
 condition, there were not in England more than two or three 
 American elders preaching the faith, for when — two years 
 before the period of which I speak — the Saints left Nauvoo 
 and undertook that most extraordinary exodus across the 
 plains to the Rocky Mountains, the missionary elders were all 
 called home, and the work of proselytizing in Europe was left 
 entirely to the native elders. To direct their labors there was 
 placed over them an American elder named Orson Spencer, a 
 graduate of Dartmouth University, a scholar and a gentle- 
 man — a man well calculated from his previous Christian 
 education to give an elevated tone to the teachings of the 
 young English missionaries. 
 
 Mormonism in England, then, had no resemblance to the 
 Mormonism of Utah to-day. The Mormons were then sim- 
 ply an earnest religious' people, in many respects like the 
 Methodists, especially in their missionary zeal and fervor of 
 spirit. The Mormon Church abroad was purely a religious 
 institution, and Mormonism was preached by the elders as the 
 gospel of Christianity restored. The church had no political 
 shaping nor the remotest antagonism to the civil power. The 
 
48 HOW CONVERTS WERE MADE. 
 
 name of Joseph Smith was seldom spoken, and still more 
 seldom was heard the name of Brigham Young, and then 
 only so far as they had reference to the Church of the Saints. 
 
 About eighteen months before I visited Southampton, one 
 of these missionaries had come into that town, "without 
 purse or scrip." He was quite a young man and almost pen- 
 niless, but he was rich in faith and overflowing with zeal. He 
 knew no one there, and homeless, and frequently hungry, he 
 continued his labors. Of fasting he knew much, of feasting 
 nothing. He first preached under the branches of a spread- 
 ing beech tree in a public park, and when more favored he 
 held forth in a school-room or public hall. He had come to 
 convert the people to Mormonism or he was going to die 
 among them, and before such zeal and determination, discour- 
 agements, of course, soon vanished away. He troubled the 
 ministers of other dissenting chtirches when they found him 
 distributing tracts and talking to their people. He was sow- 
 ing broadcast dissatisfaction and discontent wherever he could 
 get any one to listen to him, and thus he drew down upon 
 himself the eloquence of the dissenting pulpits and the deri- 
 sion of the local press. But the more they attacked him the 
 more zealously did he labor, and defied his opponents to 
 public discussion. Mormonism was bold then in Europe-^it 
 had no American history to meet in those days. 
 
 This, and a great deal more, I had heard discussed in glow- 
 ing language by my relatives and friends ; and thus the young 
 missionary — Elder Stenhouse — was, by name, no stranger to 
 me. 
 
 It was Elder Stenhouse who now addressed the meeting, 
 and I listened to him with attention. The reader must 
 remember that at that time polygamy was unheard of as a 
 doctrine of the Saints, and the blood-atonement, the doctrine 
 that Adam is God, together with the polytheism and priestly 
 theocracy of after years were things undreamed of. The 
 saving love of Christ, the glory and fulness of the everlast- 
 ing Gospel, the gifts and graces of the Spirit, together with 
 repentance, baptism, and faith, were the points upon which 
 
"THE OTHER DAUGHTER*' FROM FRANCE. 49 
 
 the Mormon teachers touched ; and who can wonder that 
 with such topics as these, and fortifying every statement with 
 powerful and numerous texts of Scripture, they should capti- 
 vate the minds of religiously inclined people ? However this 
 may be, I can only confess that as I listened to Elder Sten- 
 house's earnest discourse, I felt my antipathy to Mormonism 
 rapidly melting away. 
 
 At the close of the service, when he left the platform, he 
 was warmly received by the brethren and sisters, for so the 
 Saints speak of one another, and they came about him to 
 shake hands, or it mfght be to seize the opportunity of slip- 
 ping a trifle into his hand to help him in his work. Young 
 and old, the poor and their more wealthy neighbors mingled 
 together like one happy family. It was altogether a most 
 pleasing scene, and, whatever explanation may yet be given to 
 Mormonism in America, one thing I know — the facts of its 
 early history in Europe are among the most pleasant reminis- 
 cences of my life. 
 
 Elder Stenhouse came up in a familiar and open-hearted 
 way to my mother and sisters, and I was introduced to him 
 as " the other daughter from France." He kindly welcomed 
 me, and when I frankly told him the state of my mind, he 
 made, I must admit, a successful attempt to solve my doubts, 
 and when I left the meeting it was with sentiments towards 
 the saints and their religion far different from those which I 
 entertained when I entered. 
 
 This meeting was a memorable era in my life. 
 
CHAPTER III. 
 
 THE LABOR OF MY LIFE BEGUN :— HOW THE MORMON MIS- 
 SIONARIES MADE CONVERTS. 
 
 A Confirmation Meeting — The'Age for Baptism — How Sister Martha was Cony- 
 firmed — How Mormon Saints are " Blessed " — The Spirit of Prophecy — A 
 Lecture by Elder §tenhouse — The New Gospel Explained — A Vision of Lat- 
 ter-Day Glory — How I was Convinced — The Finger of Destiny draws Me On — 
 A Mormon Baptism — I Become a Member of the Church — I am Baptized, 
 Confirmed, and Blessed — I begin a New Life — A Happy Dream of Missionary. 
 Usefulness — I begin Work with Enthusiasm — Methodism and Mormonism 
 Compared — How Converts are made — Religious Revivals — The Anxious 
 Seats-^A Testimony Meeting — How Brigham Young has Damped the Ardor 
 of the Saints — Magical Effects of an Elder's Speech — The Mormon Marseil- 
 laise — Effects of Song upon Religious Feeling. 
 
 IN the afternoon I attended a meeting of a still more inter- 
 esting character. These Sunday afternoon meetings were 
 held for the purpose of receiving the sacrament, and the con- 
 firmation of those who had been baptized during the week ; 
 they were intended exclusively for the Saints, but for certain 
 reasons I was permitted to be present. 
 
 The meeting was opened with singing and prayer, and then 
 the presiding Elder — Brother Cowdy — arose, and invited all 
 those who had been baptized during the week to come to the 
 front seats. Several ladies and gentlemen came forward, and 
 also three little children. Upon inquiry I found that children 
 of eight years of age were admitted members of the Church 
 by baptism — which is administered by immersion. At that 
 age they are supposed to understand what they are doing; but 
 before that, if of Mormon parents, they are considered mem- 
 bers of the Church by virtue of the blessing which they re- 
 
THE RITE OF CONFIRMATION. 5 J 
 
 ceived in infancy. Brother Cowdy^ — the presiding eldeu — 
 then called upon two other elders to assist him in the confirm- 
 ation. 
 
 One of the ladies took off her bonnet but retained her seat, 
 when all three of the Elders placed their hands upon her head, 
 and one of them said : — 
 
 " Martha ; by virtue of the authority vested in us, we confirm you a member 
 of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints ; and as you have been 
 obedient to the teachings of the Elders, and have gone down into the waters of 
 baptism for the remission of your sins, we confer upon you the Gift of the Holy 
 Ghost, that it may abide ^ith you for ever, and be a lamp unto your feet and a 
 light upon your pathway, leading and guiding you into all truth. This blessing 
 we confirm upon your head, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of 
 the Holy Ghost. Amen." 
 
 Then, before they took their hands off her head, the presid- 
 ing Elder asked the other two if they wished to say anything. 
 Whereupon one of them began to invoke a blessing upon the 
 newly-confirmed sister. He spoke for some time with extreme 
 earnestness, when suddenly he was seized with a nervous tremb- 
 ling which was quite perceptible, and which evidently betokened 
 intense mental or physical excitement. He began to prophesy 
 great things for this sister in the future, and in solemn and mys- 
 terious language proclaimed the wonders which God would per- 
 form for her sake. When we consider the excited state of her 
 mind, and — if the statements of psychologists be true — the 
 magnetic currents which were being transmitted from the 
 sensitive nature of the man into the excited brain of the new 
 convert, together with the pressure of half a dozen human 
 hands upon her head, it is not at all astonishing that when the 
 hands were lifted off she should firmly believe that she had 
 been blessed indeed. She had been told that she should 
 receive the Gift of the Holy Ghost ; and she did not for an 
 instant doubt that her expectations had been realized. 
 
 Each of the newly baptized went through the same cere- 
 mony, and then they all partook of the sacrament, when, after 
 another hymn, the meeting was closed with prayer. 
 
 In the evening I returned to listen to a lecture upon " the 
 character, spirit, and genius " of the new church, delivered by 
 
52 ELDER STENHOUSE DELIVERS A LECTURE. 
 
 Elder Stenhouse; and I was captivated by the picture which 
 he drew of the marvejlpus latter-day work which he affirmed 
 had already begun. The visions of by-gone ages were again 
 vouchsafed to men ; angels had visibly descended to earth ; 
 God had raised up in a mighty way a Prophet, as of old, to 
 preach the dispensation of the last days ; gifts of prophecy, 
 healing, and the working of miracles were now, as in the day's 
 of the Apostles, witnesses to the power of God. The long-lost 
 tribes of Israel were about to be gathered into the one great 
 fold of Christ ; and the fulness of the Gentiles being come, 
 they, too, were to be taken under the care of the Good Shep- 
 herd. All were freely invited to come and cast away their 
 sins, ere it was too late ; and the fullest offers of pardon, grace, 
 sanctification and blessing, in this world and in the next, were 
 presented to every repentant soul. 
 
 Surely, I thought, these are the selfsame doctrines which 
 my mother taught me when I knelt beside her in childhood, 
 and which I have so often heard — only in colder and less per- 
 suasive language — urged from the pulpits of those whom I 
 have ever regarded in the light of true disciples of Jesus. Who 
 can wonder that I listened with rapt attention, and that my 
 heart was even then half won to the new faith > The days 
 passed ; and as I pondered over these things it appeared to me. 
 that I had at last found that which I had so long earnestly 
 desired and prayed for — a knowledge of that true religion for 
 which the Saviour presented Himself a Holy Sacrifice, and 
 which the Apostles preached at peril of their lives — the onlj/ 
 faith, in which I might find joy and peace in believing. 
 
 But why should I dwell upon those moments, soul-absorbing 
 as was their interest to me i^en — sadly-pleasing as is their 
 memory now ! The reader can see the drift of my thoughts 
 at that time ; and I feel sure, although I have but hastily 
 sketched the causes which brought about these great changes 
 in my religious beUef and in my life, that he will not hastily- 
 accuse me of fickleness and love of change, if he himself- has 
 fought the battles of the soul and has learned even in a slight 
 measure to realize the mystery of his inner-being. 
 
1 AM BAPTISED A MORMON SAINT. 53 
 
 Each day the finger of destiny drew me nearer to the final 
 step. The young Elder, whose words I had listened to with 
 such strange and, to me, momentous results, was intimate with 
 my father's family and called frequently to see us, and before 
 long he convinced me that it was my duty to test for myself 
 whether the work was of God, or not. In the agitated state 
 of my mind at that time, I could not withstand the earnest 
 appeals which were made to my affections and hopes ; and 
 within two weeks after my arrival in England, I became form- 
 ally a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day 
 Saints ; or in more popular language — I became a Mormon. 
 
 The day was fixed for my baptism. Several others were to 
 be baptized at the same time ; for scarcely a week passed with- 
 out quite a number of persons joining the church. For this 
 purpose we all repaired to a bath-house on the banks of the 
 Southampton river. This place was not perhaps the most 
 convenient, and it certainly was devoid of the slightest tingq 
 of romance ; but it was the only one available to the saints at 
 that time. 
 
 When we were all assembled and had united in singing and 
 prayer, Elder Stenhouse went down into the water first, arjd 
 then two men went down and were baptized, and came up 
 again. Now came my turn. I was greatly agitated, for I felt 
 all the solemnity of the occasion. I had dressed myself very 
 neatly and purely, for I believed that angel eyes were upon 
 me ; I wished to give myself — a perfect and acceptable offer- 
 ing — to my God, and I was filled with the determination hence- 
 forth to devote my whole life to his service. 
 
 As I went down into the waters of baptism, how thankful I 
 felt that it had been my privilege to hear the gospel in my 
 youth, for now I could give my heart in all its freshness to the 
 Lord, before it had been chilled by the cold, hard experience 
 of life. 
 
 I descended the steps, and Elder Stenhouse came forward 
 and led me out into the water ; then taking both my hands in 
 one of his, he raised his other hand towards heaven, and in a 
 solemn and impressive voice he said : 
 
54 I RECEIVE THE BLESSINGS OF THE PRIESTHOOD. 
 
 " Fanny ; by virtue of the authority vested in me, I baptize you for the remission 
 of your sins; in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. 
 Amen." 
 
 Then he immersed me in the water ; and as I reascended 
 the steps, I really felt like another being: all my past was 
 buried in the deep — the waters of baptism had washed away 
 my sins ; and a new life lay open before me, in which my foot- 
 steps would be guided by the inspired servants of God. All 
 now would ise peace and joy within me, for I had obeyed the 
 commands of God, and I doubted not that I should receive the 
 promised blessing, and that now I could indeed go on my way 
 rejoicing. 
 
 My baptism took place one Saturday afternoon, and the 
 afternoon following I was confirmed a member of the church. 
 Elder Stenhouse presided at the meeting, and he, with Elder 
 Cowdy and two other elders, confirmed me. As the "bless- 
 ing" which I then myself received differs somewhat from the 
 one which I have already given, and as it is a very fair speci- 
 men of those effusions, I present it to the reader in full. 
 
 Elder Stenhouse, Elder Cowdy, and, the two other elders, 
 placed their hands solemnly upon my head, and Elder Sten- 
 house said : — 
 
 " Fanny ; by virtue of the authority vested in me, I confirm you a member 
 of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints ; and inasmuch as you have 
 been obedient to the command of God, through his servants, and have been bap- 
 tized for the remission of your sins, I say unto you that those sins are remitted. 
 And in the name of God I bless you, and say unto you, that inasmuch as you are 
 faithful and obedient to teachings of the priesthood, and seek the advancement of 
 the kingdom, there is no good thing that your heart can desire that the Lord will 
 not give unto you. You shall have visions and dreams, and angels shall visit you 
 by day and by night; You shall stand in the temple in Zion, and administer to the 
 Saints of the Most High God. You shall speak in tongues, and prophesy ; and 
 the Lord shall bless you abundantly, both temporally and spiritually. These 
 blessings I seal upon your head, inasmuch as you shall be faithful ; and I pray 
 heaven to bless you ; and say unto you — Be thou blessed, in the name of the Fa- 
 ther, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen." 
 
 After the meeting, I received the congratulations of all the 
 Saints pres'ent, and more particularly those of my own family. 
 My dear mother and father were overjoyed, and I now learned, 
 how anxious they had been, and how they had feared that I 
 
I ENGAGE IN MISSIONARY WORK. 55 
 
 should return to France and reject the faith of the new dis- 
 pensation. Altogether we were very happy. 
 
 Elder Stenhouse and Elder Cowdy returned home with us 
 to tea, and afterwards we all attended the usual evening 
 lecture. In this way was passed one of the happiest days of 
 my life — one which I shall ever remember ; — and yet that 
 memory will always be mingled with regret that so much love 
 and devotion as I then felt were not enlisted in a better cause. 
 
 Thus began a new era in my life. All my former friends 
 and associations were now to be remembered no more : my 
 lot was cast among^the Saints ; and in the state of my mind 
 at that time, I believed that I should be happy in my new 
 position, and resolved to give evidence of the sincerity of my 
 faith. 
 
 The untiring 'energy and restless activity of Elder' Sten- 
 house was ever before our eyes, and inspired all who associ- 
 ated with him with a similar enthusiasm. There were no 
 drones in that hive. The brethren, at a word from him, 
 ivould roam the country, teaching and preaching in the open 
 Air, while the sisters would go from house to house in the 
 "jty, distributing tracts about the new faith. I caught the 
 enthusiasm of the rest, and was soon in the ranks with the 
 other sisters, as devoted in my endeavors as a young, ambitious, 
 heart could be. I was indeed like one born again from an old 
 existence into a new life. I felt grateful and happy — I 
 began to dream of the eternal honor which crowns a faithful 
 missionary life ; and I soon found an ample field for testing, 
 my fitness for that vocation. 
 
 At the time of which I speak, the Primitive Methodists in 
 England were doing a great work in the way of converting 
 sinners. Their missionaries were zealous and devoted men,, 
 though generally poor and uneducated. They resembled very 
 closely the Mormon elders in their labors ; and, in fact, a very 
 large number of the leading Mormons had been Methodist 
 local-preachers and exhorters ; and the greater number of the 
 new-born Saints had come from that denomination with their 
 former teachers, or else had followed them, soon after. 
 
56 CONVERTS IN COUNTRY PLACES. 
 
 The change from Methodist to Mormon was, in course of 
 time,, very strongly marked ; but for a considerable period the 
 same, or what seemed the same, influences were at work 
 among the people. Remarkable scenes of excitement were 
 often witnessed at the " love feasts ; " and from the " anxious 
 seats," as they were called, might be heard, the entreaties of 
 self-accusing souls, frightened by a multitude of sins, crying 
 earnestly, nay, wildly, for grace, mercy, and the Holy Ghost,' 
 while many of the supplicants would fall upon the ground, 
 completely overcome by nervous excitement. Then they 
 would have visions, and beheld great and unutterable things ; 
 received the forgiveness of their sins ; and, coming back to 
 consciousness, believed themselves now to be the children of 
 God, and new creatures ; doubting not that they would ever 
 after be happy in the Lord. * 
 
 The experience of the Saints at their meetings, when 
 Mormonism was first preached, was exactly similar to this. 
 Into the psychological, moral, or religious causes of these 
 scenes of excitement I cannot here enter ; — I simply mentioii 
 facts as they came under my own observation. 
 
 The Mormon Missionary often came upon whole communi- 
 ties in the rural districts of England, where this " good time " 
 was in full operation ; and being a man of texts he would 
 follow up the revival, preaching that the spirit of the prophet 
 was subject to the prophet, and not the prophet subject to the 
 spirit. Controversy would arise, and his appeal to Scripture; 
 literally interpreted, was almost invariably triumphant. Even 
 in this country, especially in New York and Ohio, the same 
 causes produced the same effects. It was after his mind was 
 excited by a general revival near his native place, that Joseph . 
 Smith, the founder of Mormonism, received his first religious 
 impression, and saw, as he asserted, his first angelic vision. 
 His followers, even in the early days of the church, had 
 revival-meetings and meetings at which the most extraordin. 
 ary excitement was manifested, — when the Saints fell into 
 ecstatic trances, saw heaven opened, and spake with tongues. 
 But Joseph, shrewd man as he was, albeit " a prophet," when 
 
tHE GIFT OF THE SPIRIT: — REVELATION AND PROPHECY. 57 
 
 he found too many rival seers were coming into the field, 
 announced by " special revelation," that these too-gifted per- 
 sons were possessed by devils, and that their visions and 
 prophecyings must be at once suppressed. And he did sup- 
 press them. 
 
 Not long after my own baptism I was present at a meeting 
 of this description, in Southampton. It was called a " testi- 
 mony meeting," and was held in a large upper room situated, 
 if I rightly remember, in Chandog stireeit. No one from the 
 outside would have supposed that it was the place of assembly 
 of the Saints, for ifrwas generally used for ordinary secular 
 meetings, and I have heard that great objections were at first 
 raised as to the propriety of letting it to the Mormons. 
 
 As we entered the door, we were saluted by Brother 
 Williams, who expressed great pleasure at seeing us. There 
 was a full attendance of the Saints, and every face wore an 
 expression of peaceful earnestness. A person who has never 
 attended a Mormon meeting can form no idea of the joyous 
 spirit which seemed to animate every one present. I am not, 
 of course, speaking of modern meetings, but of meetings as 
 they used to be. Whence and whatever that " spirit " might 
 be which moved the sisters and brethren when they met in 
 early times, I cannot tell ; but I, and with me, ten thousand 
 Mormons and seceding Mormons in Utah, can, from our own 
 experience, testify that that spirit no longer visits the Taber- 
 nacle servipes over which Brigham Young presides, or the 
 meetings of the Saints since they adopted the accursed 
 doctrine of polygamy, and forsook the gentle leadings of their 
 first love. 
 
 Often have I heard Mormons of good standing and high 
 position in the church, lament the " good old times " as they 
 called them, when the outpouring of the Spirit was so abund- 
 ant, and mourn over the cold, barren services of the present 
 day. But the elders explain this away. It is, they say, the 
 fault of the people themselves, and because' their own hearts 
 have become cold. 
 
 At the meeting of which I speak, that happy spirit was 
 
58 SAINTS AT work: — A TESTIMONY MEETING. 
 
 peculiarly marked. An encouraging smile, or a kind word, 
 greeted me on every side, and, as a newly converted sister, I 
 received the most cordial welcome. The brethren were seated 
 on forms and chairs and any other convenient article which 
 came to hand, while at the further end of the room was 
 Brother Bench, who was to preside, and with him several 
 other leading elders. Brother Bench gave out a suitable 
 hymn. 
 
 The whole congregation .joined in the singing, and every 
 heart seemed lifted up with devotion. Then another elder 
 rose and offered a spirit-moving prayer ; and then the brother 
 who presided stated that for the time he withdrew his control 
 of the proceedings, and, as the phrase was, he " put the meet- 
 ing in the hands of the Saints," exhorting them not to let the 
 time pass by unimproved. 
 
 There was at first a momentary hesitation, but Brother' 
 Burton got up and fixed the hearts of the Saints by relating 
 what the Lord had done for him. He told us of his zeal for 
 the faith, and how, during the week, he had had a terrible 
 discussion with an unbeliever — a clever and learned man, too, 
 and well ski-lied in dialectics — how he trembled at first at the 
 idea of contesting with such an antagonist, but that the Lord 
 had helped him, until argument after argument had been- 
 overthrown and he had come off victor in the fight. Then 
 appealing to every one present he exhorted them to similar 
 zeal, and promised them abundant help from on high to 
 achieve a like result. 
 
 Then arose Brother Edwards, a well-tried champion of the 
 faith, and to him every one listened with profound attention, 
 eagerly drinking in his every utterance. I could almost, even 
 now, imagine that he was "really inspired. Then I firmly 
 believed he was. His voice thrilled with an earnestness 
 which seemed to us something more than the mere excite- 
 ment of the soul. A burning fire seemed to flash from his 
 large, expressive eyes ; his features were lighted up with that 
 animation which gives a saint-like halo to . the earnest face 
 when fired with indignation or pleading soul-felt truths ; while 
 
THE MORMON MARSEILLAISE. 59 
 
 his whole frame seemed to glow with the glory of a land 
 beyond this earth, as in the most impressive and convincing 
 language he reminded us that our sins had been washed 
 away by the waters of baptism, that upon us had been poured 
 the gifts and graces of the Spirit, and that it was our sacred 
 privilege, to testify of these things. 
 
 The effect of this exhortation was magical. We forgot all 
 our outward surroundings, in the realisation that the great 
 work of the Lord was so gloriously begun and that it would 
 surely go on, conquering and to conquer. One sister — an 
 elderly woman — who was present, unable to control her emo- 
 tion, burst out with that Mormon hymn which I have heard 
 some old Nauvoo Saints declare produced upon the people 
 in those days an enthusiasm similar to that which moves the 
 heart of every true Frenchman when he listens to the soul- 
 stirring notes of the Marseillaise : 
 
 The Spirit of God like a fire is burning ! 
 
 The latter-day glory begins to come forth; 
 The visions and blessings of old are returning, 
 
 The angels are coming to visit the earth. 
 We'll sing and we'll shout with the armies of heaven 
 
 Hosannah ! Hosannah, to God and the Lamb ! 
 All glory to them in the highest be given, 
 
 Henceforth and for ever : Amen, and Amen ! 
 
 I have often heard in magnificent cathedrals, hoary with 
 the dust of time, and in vast places of amusement dedicated 
 specially to music and to song, the outpouring of that glorious 
 vocal flood, which a chorus of a thousand well-trained singers, 
 can alone send forth. I have felt sometimes that entrancing 
 state of ecstacy which thrilled the soul of the seer in Patmos, 
 as he listened to the melody of the angelic throng — "the 
 voice of many waters, and the peal of mighty thunders, and 
 the notes of harpers harping upon their harps ; " but never, 
 even when surrounded by all that was best calculated to 
 produce a sentiment of devotion in my mind — never did I 
 experience so rapt a feeling of communion with " the armies 
 of heaven" — as I. felt in that unadorned meeting-room sur- 
 rounded by those plain but earnest and united people. 
 
60 THE UNISON OF RELIGION AND SONG. 
 
 Nor was I alone in this. The feeling was contagious. 
 There was not one present who did not sympathise. And 
 thus, I suppose, melody has always played a prominent part 
 in all religious revivals, whether of divine or human origin. 
 The Apostles had their psalms, and hymns, and spiritual 
 songs ; the Martyrs their Te Deum ; the Waldenses made the 
 hills and vales of Piedmont vocal with their singing; the 
 Lollards and Hussites had their melodies ; and in more 
 modern days the followers of Luther, Wesley, and (may I 
 add .') Joseph Smith, have poured out the fulness of their 
 souls after the same fashion. 
 
 The last notes of the hymn had scarcely died away when 
 another, and then another brother arose and bore testimony 
 to the great work, told what the Lord had done for them 
 personally, told of their zeal for the faith, and fervently 
 exhorted all present to persevere unto the end. Again prayer' 
 was offered, another hymn sung, and the Saints were dis^ 
 missed with a solemn benediction. 
 
CHAPTER IV. 
 
 LIFE AMONG THE SAINTS :— MY NEW ENGAGEMENTS. 
 
 Beginning Life as a Mormon — Breaking Way from the Past — My Friends in 
 France — Placed in a difficult Position — I Remember my Betrothed — Exclu- 
 siveness of my New Faith — An " Apostle " lays down the Law — How to Keep 
 aloof from the Gentiles — Woman's Duty — " The Foundation of a Little Family 
 ICingdofti " — ^The " Gift of Tongues " in Modern Days — An Extraordinary 
 Meeting — Sister Ellis exercises her " Gift," — Need of an Interpreter — Emo- 
 tional Religion — How Brother Brigham once " Spake in Tongues " — A "High 
 time" at Kirtland in the days of Joseph — A Scene in the Lion House — One of 
 the Prophet's Wives " Speaks " — Another Wife Interprets — I Receive a Bless- 
 ing — Brother Young Discountenances the "Gift" — Only half Convinced — "To 
 Doubt is Sin" — I Arrive at an Important Conclusion — I instruct Elder Sten- 
 house in the French Language — An Interesting Pupil — Declining the verb 
 yAime — Studies in the Back Parlor — A Persevering Young Man — Why I 
 listened to Elder Stenhouse's Suit — I am Engaged to Him — I become a Mis- 
 sionary's Wife — I write to my Friends in France — A Free Confession — Plea- 
 sant Memories of the Past. 
 
 I WAS now a Mormon in every sense of the word, although 
 entirely ignorant of Utah politics and polygamy. 
 My dreams were of a life of happiness spent in seeking to 
 convert'the whole world to the religion of Jesus, which I be- 
 lieved had been restored again to earth by the ministry of 
 holy angels. It is easy to say that such an ambition was ill- 
 directed when associated with Mormonism, but no one can 
 deny that, in itself, it was the noblest and purest that could 
 inspire the heart of man. There was no sacrifice too great 
 for me to make ; there was no object too dear for me to re- 
 sign, if it stood in the way of my sacred calling. The whole 
 current of my thoughts and plans was now changed. It was 
 henceforth my duty to be entirely forgetful of self, and to de- 
 vote my energies — my all — to the advancement of the King- 
 
62 MATRIMONIAL DIFFICULTIES. 
 
 dom of God. My life was to be identified with the Saints, — 
 my faith required it, and I was willing that it should be so. 
 
 But what of my beloved France, all this time ; and my be- 
 trothed husband ? 
 
 This reflection aroused within me a most painful train of 
 thought. How many fond and endearing memories entwined 
 themselves around my heart at that moment, when most I 
 needed to banish them for ever ! With what lingering love 
 did I look back to those dear ones from whom I had pairted 
 but a few short weeks before, and who I might perhaps never 
 see again ! To return would be to desert my newly-adopted', 
 friends and faith — to violate the covenant which I had made 
 at baptism to " be ever afterwards governed by the servants 
 of God." 
 
 No ; it was too late — I could not now return ; — I tried to 
 persuade myself that I did not even wish to ; — in a word.s 
 affection, and what I thought duty, were at war together in 
 my heart. All my former ties and associations must now be 
 severed, however terrible the cost might be ; and I was bound 
 not oply to submit, but even to glory in the sacrifice. 
 Thus I argued away the regrets which would at times agitate 
 my very soul itself, and caused me so much painful thought. 
 
 The trial of my profession in the new faith came swiftly to 
 my door. My marriage-engagement must be broken off, 
 though I knew not how that could honorably and conscien- 
 tiously be done. Of myself I had no wish to draw back from 
 anything that I had promised of my own free will ; and much 
 less did I desire to be faithless to my solemnly plighted 
 word. 
 
 I now first realised the all-absorbing influence of an earnest 
 religious faith. I was brought face to face with the fact that 
 I could not marry out of the Mormon Church. The teaching 
 of the elders was against it, and I saw that in this they were 
 consistent. Great as was the trial, and painful as was the 
 sacrifice, I resolved to be true to my religion. How very 
 earnestly the elders insisted upon such sacrifices, may be seen 
 from an appeal made at a later date by the " Apostle " Orsoii 
 
PILLARS OF THE MORMON CHURCH. 
 
AN APOSTLE LAVS DOWN THE LAW, 65 
 
 Pratt. Brother Orson was in Europe, and, speaking author- 
 itatively, he set forth the duties of mothers and daughters in 
 " Babylon," as he graciously styled the rest of the world, in 
 the following terms which unmistakably show the purposes 
 of the leaders relative to marriage : 
 
 " Many of you have daughters, some of whom are grown to womanhood; 
 others are now young. Would you have them gather with you to a land where 
 virtue and peace dwell, where God has promised to protect and bless the right- 
 eous ? If sd, teach them, as they love their parents, and the Saints, and the 
 truth, not to throw themselves away by marrying Gentiles ; teach them to keep 
 themselves entirely aloof frpm Gentile courtships and associations. Scores of 
 women who once were counselled as you are now, are mourning in wretchedness, 
 in bondage to Gentile husbands, cut off from all privilege of gathering with their 
 fathers, mothers, brethren, and sisters ; and, in some instances, cut off from 
 even attending the Saints' meetings. But this is not all. They are raising up 
 children in these lands to perish with themselves in the general desolations com- 
 ing upon Babylon. But what is still more aggravating and heart-rending, they 
 are raising up children not only destined for temporal judgments, but who must 
 for ever be cut off from the presence of God and the glory of the celestial king- 
 dom ***** What fearful responsibility for any young sister to volun- 
 tarily take upon herself, after all the warnings she has received. See to it, 
 then, parents, that you not only do not give your consent, but actually forbid all 
 such marriages. 
 
 Let them marry according to the holy order of God, and begin to lay the 
 foundation of a little family kingdom which shall no more be scattered upon the 
 face of the earth, but dwell in one country, keeping their genealogies from gen- 
 eration to generation, until each man's house shall be multiplied as the stars of 
 heaven." 
 
 These were the influences which were brought to beat upon 
 my mind at a time when it was peculiarly sensitive and open 
 to impressions from without. 
 
 While in this uncertain state a little incident occurred 
 which, though in itself of the most trifling nature, assisted in 
 forming my ultimate decision. 
 
 It was a beautiful evening in early summer, and my mother 
 and sister asked me to accotnpany them to one of the testi- 
 mony-meetings which I have already described. This meet- 
 ing was very similar to the others, with one notable excep- 
 tion : — it was here that I saw and heard, for the iirst time in 
 my own experience, the " gift of tongues " exercised. 
 
66 THE GIFT OF TONGUES, 
 
 I had, of course, heard a great deal about this " gift," much 
 of which was anything but satisfactory, as I think the reader 
 will agree with me, when I explain myself. 
 
 I had read in Scripture that the Apostles of Jesus Christ 
 tarried in Jerusalem until, the day of Pentecost, when power 
 was given them from on high. Being all together in one 
 place, engaged in earnest supplication and the praise of God, 
 suddenly the building in which they were, shook to its very 
 foundation, and the sound of a mighty, rushing wind was 
 heard, and the Spirit of the Eternal One, who, ere the dawn- 
 ing of creation moved upon the waters of chaos, descended in 
 visible shape, palpable to their eyes in the form of a cloven 
 tongue, an emblem of the gift of eloquence and diversity of 
 speech which was henceforth to be theirs. 
 
 Then arose Peter, that disciple so full of zeal. Henceforth 
 he was no longer to be called a disciple, but an " Apostle," 
 which by interpretation is one "sent forth ;" — ^for now he had 
 received his commission, and, in the power of the Highest, he, 
 with the other Ambassadors of Jesus, could go forth upon 
 their glorious work. But newly pardoned for his great traiis- 
 gression, and still remembering the Saviour's pitying look, and 
 the thrice-repeated question — " Lovest thou Me more than 
 these .'" — burning, also, with zeal to give evidence of his love 
 — the Leader of the Apostles addressed the multitude gathered , 
 from every clime to keep the feast. 
 
 Lo,« then, a miracle ! The Jew of Jerusalem wondered at 
 the wisdom of the unlettered Fisherman. The magi from the 
 still more distant Orient were amazed to hear so strange a 
 story. The Greek paused at the utterances of this new phil- 
 osophy. But strangest of all was the fact that, though utterly 
 unable to comprehend each other's speech, they all, listening 
 at the same time, could understand the words of the untaught 
 fisherman. 
 
 Long before I had even heard of Mormonism, I had frequently 
 thought how wonderfully useful this gift must have been to the. 
 Apostles. One of the great difficulties encountered by the 
 missionary is learning the language of the people among whottt 
 
A MODERN ORACLE, 6/ 
 
 he works and lives. To be able to dispense with all this 
 labor, and to be understood wherever he went, must have 
 lightened the mind of the holy man of half its load ; and 
 naturally, when I heard that the Mormons had " the Gift of 
 Tongues," I supposed it was the self-same power of diverse 
 speech as that exercised by the Apostles ; and I presume the 
 reader will conjecture with me that it was the same "gift," or, at 
 least, some imitation of it. How surprised I was when I first 
 discovered the meaning of the term " speaking in tongues," 
 among the Mormons, may perhaps be imagined when I ex- 
 plain what happened at that testimony-meeting. 
 
 After prayer, and singing, and listening to several very fer- 
 vent addresses from some of the elders. Brother Seely had 
 delivered a most impassioned speech, and had hardly con- 
 cluded, when Sister Ellis, who was sitting near me, gave evi- 
 dence of being in an abnormal condition of mind, which to 
 me was painful in the extreme. Her hands were clenched, 
 and her eyes had that wild and supernatural glare which is 
 never seen, save in cases of lunacy or intense feverish excite- 
 ment. Every one waited breathlessly, listening to catch what 
 she might say ; — you might have heard a pin drop. 
 
 Then in oracular language and with all the impassioned 
 dignity of one inspired of heaven, she began to speak. 
 
 I say " speak," as that term is generally applied to the ut- 
 terances of the human voice ; but she did not speak in the 
 sense in which we always employ that word ; she sin;iply 
 emitted a series of sounds. They seemed to me chiefly the 
 repetition of the same syllables — something like a child re- 
 peating, la, la, la, le, lo ; ma, ma, ma, mi, ma ; dele, dele, 
 dele, hela — followed, perhaps, by a number of sounds strung 
 together, which could not be rendered in any shape by the 
 pen. Sometimes in the Far West, in later years, I have heard 
 old Indian women, crooning wierdly monotonous and outland- 
 ish ditties in their native tongue. These wild dirges, more 
 nearly than anything else I ever heard, resembled the pro- 
 phetic utterances of Sister Ellis ; save only, that the appear- 
 ance of the latter was far too solemn to admit of even a smile 
 at what she said. 
 
68 THE INTERPRETATION OF TONGUES. 
 
 Ridiculous as this appears when I now write it down on 
 paper, and strange as even then it was to me, there was some- 
 thing so commanding, so earnest, so " inspirational," if I may 
 be allowed the term, in Sister Ellis's manner, that I could not 
 wonder at the attention which the brethren and sisters paid 
 to this gifted speaker in tongues. 
 
 I now know that, these extraordinary displays are by no 
 means confined to Mormonism. People of a certain temper- 
 ament, excited to frenzy — generally by religious enthusiasm — 
 have in all ages given painful illustrations of this mental dis- 
 ease ; as the student who remembers the Convulsionnaires of 
 the middle ages, the Munster Anabaptists of Luther's time, 
 and the various emotional sects of more modern days, will 
 abundantly bear me witness. But at that time, new in the 
 faith, and believing as I did, that, as the elders said, it was 
 the manifestation of the power of God, as foretold by the 
 prophet Joel, though I secretly felt a sense of repugnance, I 
 tried to combat my better sentiments. 
 
 Overcome by the excitement of the moment, Sister Ellis 
 suddenly paused, not so much intentionally as from sheer 
 inability to proceed ; and the leading elders looked round 
 from one to another to see if any one was present who could 
 interpret. The gift of interpretation is very rarely possessed 
 by the same person who has the gift of tongues, and you may 
 vften hear one after another arise and " speak," but there is 
 no one to "interpret," and the Saints go away unedified. 
 Even when an interpreter is present, there is no authority to 
 determine whether he gives the proper rendering of the 
 sounds uttered, and I have over and over again heard the 
 most ludicrous stories of the comical interpretation placed by 
 some half witty or half-witted expounder upon these oracles. 
 
 When Brother Brigham — then a man who was lowly in his 
 own eyes— first met the prophet Joseph Smith, at Kirtland, 
 Ohio, there was a scene somewhat like the one I have de- 
 scribed ; and the future leader of " this people," as he calls 
 the Saints, himself spake with tongues and uttered wonderful 
 things. But even supposing his words at that time to have 
 
BROTHER BRIGHAM PLAYS THE PROPHET. 6^ 
 
 been of the wisest, we all know from the example of Balaam's 
 reprover, that it does not require a very high order of intellect 
 to speak in unaccustomed language — and that, too, to some 
 purpose. In later days the exercise oi this gift has been dis- 
 couraged by the elders, and especially by Brigham Young. 
 Going one day, some years after, to the Lion-House to see a 
 certain member of the Prophet's little family concerning a 
 subject which lay very near to my heart at that time, we 
 prayed together earnestly and anxiously ; when suddenly the 
 lady's face was lighted up with a supernatural glow, and 
 placing her hand 8n my head she, sibyl-like, poured forth a 
 flood of eloquence which — although I did not understand a 
 single word that was uttered — I confess sent through me a 
 magnetic thrill as if I had been listening to an inspired 
 seeress. Another of Brigham's wives who was present inter- 
 preted the words of blessing to me, but added : " Do not 
 speak of this, Sister Stenhouse, for Brother Young does not 
 like to hear of these things." Thus we see that one inspired 
 prophet in the presence of another " prophet, seer, and reve- 
 lator," could himself take part at one time in a miraculous 
 manifestation, which in later years he "would not like to hear 
 of," if it was only one of his many wives yvho enacted the 
 prophet's rdle. 
 
 But my meeting! I have wandered far away from that. 
 Let me proceed. 
 
 After more testimony, more " speaking,'' and much enthu- 
 siasm, the Saints separated. My sister was talking with a 
 young-lady friend, and regretting that no one present had 
 been able to interpret ; and I stood by, but did not join in the 
 conversation. Suddenly the young lady turned to me and 
 said: "Sister Fanny, do you not see in all this, more and 
 more, the convincing power of God .'" 
 
 Rather hesitatingly I replied, " Yes, I think I do." 
 
 " Think ! sister .'" said she, with warmth. " Oh, yes, I see 
 by your looks that you are only half convinced ; your faith is 
 not strong enough yet ; but remember, whatsoever is of doubt 
 is sin .'" 
 
70 ELDER STENHOUSe's FRENCH LESSONS. 
 
 "But," I answered, "I do not see clearly what good we 
 receive from these manifestations when no one can under- 
 stand them." 
 
 " That is your want of faith — ^nothing else ; you have the 
 evidence of the truth before you, and you see how these 
 miraculous powers build up the belief of God's people ; and 
 yet you doubt. To doubt is sin: whatsoever is not of faith is 
 sin. You must pray and strive, sister, to be strengthened 
 against temptation." 
 
 All this was not very logical, and it certainly did not help 
 to dispel my doubts. But, twice in the course of a few short 
 sentences, she had used a certain expression which, though 
 trifling in itself, was recalled to my mind very forcibly befon 
 many days had passed. 
 
 This was my first experience of speaking in tongues. 
 
 But there were every-day matters of much more real 
 importance to me than those strange speculations which had 
 recently employed so much of my time and attention. It 
 was now necessary that I should either return to France and 
 fulfill my engagement with Monsieur De Bosque, or else 
 resolve, once and for ever, to renounce all those ties which 
 had become so dear to me. 
 
 Meanwhile, religious theories were not the only influences 
 brought to bear upon my mind. 
 
 While day by day I began to be still more doubtful whether 
 it would not after all be sinful in God's sight for me to leave 
 my friends in the new faith and go back to France and my 
 betrothed, who I knew neither was nor ever'could become a 
 Saint, other thoughts began to intrude themselves, and to 
 shake my determination. 
 
 Elder Stenhouse's visits to my father's house began to be 
 more frequent than ever, but as he desired to become familiar 
 with the French language, and would bring his French gram- 
 mar with him " to get a lesson," as he said, no particular 
 notice was taken of his frequent coming. He was always 
 welcomed with pleasure by the whole family, and, of course, 
 by myself, who was his teacher. After awhile he took so 
 
DECLINING THE VERB JAIME. 7 1 
 
 much delight in his studies that he could not endure to let an 
 evening pass without a lesson ; and somehow or other, I must 
 confess, it was the first time since I had been a teacher that I 
 felt such a peculiar pleasure in imparting instruction. I sup- 
 pose it was the interest which all teachers experience when 
 their pupils are studiously inclined; My pupil was particu- 
 larly studious — so much so that he told my father and mdther 
 that he could not study very well in the parlor where every 
 one was conversing, and begged the privilege of having thfe 
 folding doors thrown partly open, that we* might sit in the 
 back parlor and be more quiet. 
 
 This was granted. But after a few evenings my pupil took 
 a notion to partly close the folding doors after him, and as 
 mothers' eyes are ever watchful, one of my sisters was sent' 
 in with her sewing to keep us company. But my pupil by 
 this time had made rapid progress in the French language, 
 and while my sister was innocently sewing, he was repeatirtg 
 his lesson to me ; and it was not our fault if in those French 
 phrase-books there were passages expressive of love and 
 devotion. Unconsciously to us both, he formed the habit of 
 repeating those phrases to me at all times, and I formed the 
 equally bad habit of blushing whenever he made use of 
 them. 
 
 This my sister observed, and communicated the fact to my 
 mother, who immediately said that we had better discontinue 
 our French for awhile, as it was monopolizing too much of 
 our time, and keeping both of us from attending to other 
 and more important duties. But the discontinuation of the 
 French lessons did not put an end to the visits of Elder Sten- 
 house. He was a persevering young man ; but the secret of 
 the great interest taken in the French lessons was soon dis- 
 covered. 
 
 Then it was that arguments of all kinds, and strong reasons 
 
 were brought forward to shake my purpose of returning to 
 
 •France. I was "in doubt": — when one day, discussing the 
 
 point. Elder Stenhouse made use of the very same expression 
 
 which had fallen from the sister's lips at the testimony-meet- 
 
72 MY MARRIED LIFE BEGINS. 
 
 ing — " Whatsoever is not of faith is sin." My mind tinsettled, 
 with all the strength of argument and rehgion on the one 
 side, and on the other no one to plead for reason and for my 
 return to France, who can wonder that I — at best only a 
 weak and inexperienced girl — listened to the entreaties of my 
 friends, and resolved to stay. 
 
 In the course of a few months I was engaged to be mar- 
 ried to Elder Stenhouse. It may, perhaps, seem strange that 
 I could so soon forget the past, with all its pleasant memories, 
 and renouncing m*y betrothed husband, accept the attentions 
 of another ; but it should be remembered that I now firmly 
 believed it was my duty — a duty which I dared not neglect — 
 to blot out for ever all past associations, however dear to my 
 heart they might be. Besides which, I, in common with all 
 around me, had learned to look upon Elder Stenhouse as 
 almost an angel, on account of what he had endured for the 
 Gospel's sake ; and I thought that any girl might consider 
 herself honored by an offer of marriage from a man in his 
 position in the church. My marriage in France would, I 
 feared, have been but doubtful happiness in this world, and 
 certain ruin in the next ; but heaven itself would bless my 
 union with one of its own ordained and tried servants. 
 
 Thus it came to pass that on the 6th of February, 1850— 
 eight months after my arrival in Southampton — I was mar- 
 ried to the young Mormon missionary, Elder Stenhouse. I 
 entered upon my new sphere as a missionary's wife, feeling 
 that there were no obstacles so great that I could not over- 
 come them for the Gospel's sake. How little could I then 
 imagine the life that was before me. 
 
 I wrote to my friends in France. I told them frankly all. 
 In return they wrote to me — especially Monsieur De Bosque 
 entreating me to alter my determination. Kind, and very 
 gentle, were those letters. Dear, very dear, has been the 
 memory of them, and of their writers, in Ikter days. But, 
 at the time, I felt that the influence which they still retained' 
 over me was in itself a sin. 
 
 I told all to my friends at home — showed them the letters 
 
THE MEMORY OF EARLY DAYS. 73 
 
 and everything — and, both before and after my marriage with 
 Elder Stenhouse, I never hid from myself and from him the 
 fact that until my dying day I should cherish with an un- 
 changing affection the memory of those friends whose tender 
 love was the charm of my early life. 
 
CHAPTER V. 
 
 MORMON WONDERS:— ANOINTINGS AND MIRACLES. 
 
 How a " Miracle " was Performed — The Evidence of One's Senses — Successful 
 use of Scripture Arguments — Mormon versus Local Preacher — A lively Dis- 
 cussion — A little " Personal " Matter — A Man who Never saw a Miracle — Suc- 
 cess Dependent upon Faith — " I Hardly know What to Think of It " — A New 
 Convert — How Sister Armstrong was Healed — A Genuine Case — Five Years 
 of Helplessness — Testing the Claims : — A fair Proposal — The Faithful Accept 
 the Offer — The Magnetic Principle — A good Dose of Oil — How the Anointing 
 was performed : — Aaron Outdone — Making the Passes — An Exhausting Labor 
 — " Give me your hand, Brother " — " Have faith, Sister Armstrong !" — " We 
 Thought that She was Dead " — My first Introduction to Mary Burton — A Wil- 
 ful Lassie — We become Fast Friends — Seeing is sometimes Believing — Elder- 
 Stenhouse Works a Miracle : — Cures a man of the Cholera — How a "regular 
 battle " was Fought — A Wife's unprofitable Faith — How the Miraculous Power 
 was All Used Up — How my Husband made Himself useful Again. 
 
 NOT long after my marriage I saw a miracle performed — 
 a real, true miracle. 
 
 Let not the reader smile,- or think that I am only jesting, 
 for I am quite in earnest, and mean what I say. I saw a sick 
 person who for years had been confined to her bed, her limbs 
 distorted and her back bent ; I was present when, after her 
 conversion, the elders visited her ; I saw them anoint her, and 
 lay hands on her, and pray most fervently ; and I saw the same 
 decrepit old woman walking and singing and praising God. 
 If that was not a miracle, I should like to know what is 1 
 
 The Mormon leaders preached everywhere that their religion 
 was not really a new one — it was only \he fulness of the Gos- 
 pel — the dispensation of the last days. Just — they said — as 
 Jesus Christ fulfilled and completed the old Jewish law, so the 
 modern prophet preached the perfection of Christ's Gospel; — 
 nothing new ; only the perfection of the old. This it was that 
 
METHODIST VerSUS MORMON. 75 
 
 made them so very successful when arguing with people who 
 were well-taught in the letter of the Bible, but otherwise had 
 received very little educational training. 
 
 The following attempt at an argument, which was once car- 
 ried on between a Mormon Missionary and a Methodist local 
 preacher, in my presence will serve to explain what I mean : — 
 
 Local Preacher : But, sir, I deny in toto that your elders 
 ever do work miracles. The age of miracles is past. 
 
 Mormon : Statement is not proof. You say, sir, that the 
 age of miracles is past. — Do you believe in the Bible ? 
 
 Z. P, : Certainfy, 
 
 M. : Well then, sir, — do you consider that the Bible asserts 
 that miracles can be, and have been worked, — do you believe 
 that, or not ? 
 
 Z. P. : Certainly I do. Christ and His Apostles worked 
 miracles, and the Bible speaks of many others besides. 
 
 M. : We agree on that point. But did Christ anywhere say 
 that miracles should ever cease ? Did His Apostles } 
 
 L. P. : Yes-: — No — Yes, — that is to say, I don't remember. 
 
 M. : Let me try to refresh your memory. Have not all 
 the sacred writers foretold that ultimately this globe should be 
 destroyed by fire, that the heavens should pass away, and the 
 earth melt,, and the sun, and the stars, and the moon be blot- 
 ted out .' 
 
 Z. P. : Yes, of course, we all know that. 
 
 M. : Then let me ask you. Is such a terrible convulsion a 
 common matter of fact. Is it not out of all calculation, out of 
 "all order of nature? Is it tiot a miracle — and a miracle yet to 
 be performed. — Have then miracles ceased } 
 
 L. P. : Oh yes ; but that's not a personal matter like heal- 
 ing the sick. 
 
 M. : Tell me then, does the Bible teach, or does it not 
 teach, that bone shall come to bone and sinew to sinew and 
 earth and sea shall give up their dead, at the last trump.' Is 
 not that a miracle, and don't you think it's a little "personal" 
 to you and to me .' 
 
 L. P. : Well, of course I admit that. 
 
J6 LATTER-DAY MIRACLES. 
 
 M.: But I have not done yet. Did, or did not Christ say, 
 "These signs shall follow them that believe; in my name they 
 shall cast out devils ; they shall speak with new tongues ; they 
 shall take up serpents ; and if they drink any deadly thing, it 
 shall not hurt them ; they shall lay hands on the sick and they 
 shall recover ?" Now tell me — ^Are not miracles promised 
 there, and nothing said about when they should cease. Is it 
 not just as fair for the infidel to say that one of Christ's prom- 
 ises was of no avail as for you to say that He has broken His 
 word ? 'Solemnly He makes a promise to be with them to the 
 end of the world and to confirm their miracles. You, because 
 of your want of faith, see and work no miracles, and so you 
 virtually say Christ broke His word on that point. The rest 
 of the promise you don't deny, because you can say it is ful- 
 filled without bringing forth any visible proofs. 
 
 L. P. : Well, I hardly know what to say to all this. 
 
 M. : Let me ask you one more question sir — Have j/^« ever 
 seen a miracle of any kind performed.' 
 
 L. P. : No sir. Certainly not ! 
 
 M. : And are you a teacher in Israel and know not these 
 things ? Have you been preaching the Gospel, as I think you 
 said you had, for over eighteen years, and never yet saw a 
 miracle performed : been preaching Christ and yet never saw 
 Him discover His power in proof of what you taught ? 
 
 L. P. : I'm afraid not, sir : — you trouble me. 
 
 M. : No, sir, it is not I who trouble you : it is He troubles 
 you whose word you have doubted. Only last week Mr. 
 Sterne — a minister of your own persuasion — but not far, I 
 trust, from the kingdom of God — visited Bill Wright, the mur- 
 derer, in prison.- Bill had lived a life of infamy — the vilest of 
 the vile — and he wound up his horrible crimes by cutting the 
 throat of his wife. That brute in human form refused at first 
 to speak with any one. Day after day and night after night 
 the good man went to see him, but long in vain. At length 
 ione day he chanced to mention the words of Jesus: "Him 
 that Cometh unto me, I will in no wise cast out." A little boy, 
 by his mother's knee, the murderer had listened to those words 
 
PUTTING IT TO THE TEST. 77 
 
 which have brought peace to so many broken hearts. The 
 appeals of the good minister had fallen dead upon his ears. 
 But now was the time of the Spirit's influence, and the strong 
 man wept. I have seen that fiendish man, whose very face 
 betrays the depths of degradation to which his nature has 
 fallen — I have seen him listening meekly and humbly to the 
 word of God — without hope for earth, but with a changed soul 
 within. Tell me, was not that a miracle if ever there was 
 one.' 
 
 L. P. : Sir, I admit that what you say is very forcible. I 
 admit that these things are miraculous ; but what I deny is 
 that, in these days, men, — whether Catholic priests, or Mor- 
 mon Missionaries, — can like St. Paul, or St. Peter, go about 
 with power to heal the sick or raise the dead. 
 
 M. : And what I assert, sir, is, that God in these last days 
 has raised up a holy priesthood to preach the fulness of the 
 everlasting Gospel. Peter quoted the prophecy of Joel, and 
 said that it was now fulfilled, and that "your young men 
 should see visions, and your old men dream dreams, and I will 
 pour out my Spirit upon all flesh, saith the Lord." Now if 
 those were the last days — what are these? That was the be- 
 ginning of the end ; this is the end. I do not deny that much 
 imposture has been practiced ; but the existence of a counter- 
 feit only proves that the real thing must be somewhere. In 
 many instances, too, some of our holiest men have failed, and 
 the world has scoffed at what it called their imposture. But 
 even the disciples of Christ, you remember, once tried to work 
 a miracle, and were not able to do so. What did Christ say, 
 but that it was their want of faith, and bade them fast and 
 pray more .■' 
 
 L. P. : Well, sir, I am willing to allow this, but if you your- 
 self could perform a miracle before my eyes — if, for instance, 
 you'd cure some man or woman who I knew really and truly 
 was a confirmed invalid — then, sir, I'd accept all you say' — I'd 
 become a Mormon at once ; but you'd decline that test, I sup- 
 pose } 
 
 M. '. No, sir! I would not. decline! Brother Sturges, a new 
 
78 THE PRAYER OF FAITH SHALL SAVE THE SICK. 
 
 convert of ours, has been ill for years. You know him well, 
 for he used to go to your meeting, years ago before he foil 
 from a ladder and the doctors pronounced him 'incurably deaf. 
 Your religion didn't help him, and the doctors didn't; — but if 
 that man has only faith — faith as a little child — he shall hear 
 as well as you or I hear to-day. We are going to pray over 
 him ; will you go with me ? 
 
 L. P. : Yes. I'll go, but — but I hardly know what to think 
 of it. 
 
 So saying, the two disputants walked off together. What 
 ocular demonstration of miracle-working was presented to 
 the Methodist minister, I do not know; I can only say that a 
 fortnight after, I was present at a meeting of the Saints when 
 he was admitted into the Church by immersion. He was fol- 
 lowed by a goodly number of his flock; he became a very 
 earnest missionary, and, years after, died in the full odor of 
 sanctity and was buried in Zion, clothed in the full canonicals 
 of a high-priest. 
 
 At the time of which I speak, such arguments as those I 
 hatve briefly sketched from memory, and many which were 
 much more forcibly put, had great weight with me. The Holy 
 Scriptures I implicitly believed; and taking them quite liter- 
 ally I found that the reasoning employed by the Mormons, 
 was, at least to me, altogether unanswerable. 
 
 But, for all that, I always liked my believing to be mixed 
 with a little seeing and judging for myself ; and on this account 
 it was that I went, with a good deal of pleasure, to the housfe 
 of Sister Armstrong upon whom the elders were going to lay 
 hands and pray. St. James had said: "Is any sick among 
 you.' Let him call for the Elders of the Church; and let 
 them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the 
 Lord : and the prayer of faith shall save the sick, and the Lord 
 shall raise him up ; and if he have committed sins, they shall 
 be forgiven him." I wanted to see this command obeyed in 
 these days, and to note results. 
 
 Sister Armstrong lived in a by-street not very far from the 
 ■place where our meetings were held. She had lived in South- 
 
HOW A MIRACLE WAS WORKED. 7g 
 
 ampton nearly all her life, and probably even now, although 
 in the course of nature she must long since have gone to her 
 rest, there must be many persons living who could remember 
 her and her sudden recovery from illness ; for at the time, as 
 might be expected, it produced no small sensation in the 
 immediate locality in which she resided. She had been the 
 wife of a master-builder, who meeting with an accident while 
 engaged in business, was for a long time confined helplessly 
 to the house, and then to his bed, from which he never 
 arose. 
 
 His wife was a faithful and good woman. She nursed him 
 tenderly, and by dint of great exertions on her part, was able 
 to provide all the necessaries and decencies of life for her 
 afflicted husband, herself, and their two little girls, besides 
 paying for suitable medical attendance. In course of time 
 the girls were sent to school — it was the mother's pride that 
 they should not go to a free-school, or as schools of that class 
 are called in England, a "charity-school" — and, night and 
 day, she would toil with her needle in order to carry out this 
 praiseworthy determination. When their father died, the 
 girls were a great comfort to their mother. They were now 
 almost grown up to womanhood, and were able by their own 
 exertions to add very considerably to the family income. 
 Thus happily and contentedly they lived together for several 
 years, until one of the girls married very suitably a good, 
 hard-working mechanic who had known her from ' childhood ; 
 but the other remained at home with her mother. 
 
 Not long after the marriage of her elder daughter, Mrs. 
 Armstrong was troubled with a severe cold which confined 
 her for some weeks to the house. She grew alarmingly 
 worse, and finally took to her bed. One morning her daughter 
 found her speechless, and a doctor being called in, he pro- 
 nounced her condition desperate. She was subject to con- 
 vulsive fits which were at first of very frequent occurrence. 
 After a time they came only at intervals, but their effect upon 
 her was terrible ; her limbs were drawn up towards her body 
 and her spine was completely curved, while all one side of her 
 
80 PROOFS OF AUTHORITY. 
 
 face was permanently distorted ; — and this continued for over 
 five years. 
 
 Sarah, the younger daughter, watched her mother tenderly ; 
 earning meanwhile a modest living by her needle, and from 
 the proceeds of a little miscellaneous shop which she was able 
 t6 tend without leaving the invalid for more than a few 
 minutes at a time. Thus they lived together contentedly and 
 happy until the arrival of the Mormon Missionaries in 
 Southampton. 
 
 The married daughter and her husband being rather better 
 in education and position than people of that class usually are 
 in England, had made it a rule to go regularly every Sunday 
 to their own parish church, and their children were baptized 
 by the regular clergyman. This latter gentleman, however, 
 died, and his successor who, of course, was appointed without 
 coiisulting the wishes of the people, was, although a scholar 
 and a gentleman, utterly without the slightest tinge of relig- 
 ious enthusiasm. The Methodists at that time had a grand- 
 revival, and the young couple being induced to attend one of 
 their meetings, liked what they heard, and, not long after, 
 left off their attendance at the Anglican Church and joined 
 the denomination to which they had become attached. This 
 ^hange, as might be expected, somewhat unsettled them, and 
 when the Mormon Missionaries came, Bible in hand, and 
 quoting chapter and verse for everything they said, they 
 found ready listeners ; and in a very short time the whole 
 family was admitted into the Mormon Church by baptism. 
 
 The affliction of the old lady was naturally the subject of 
 conversation among these newly-made Saints and their neigh- 
 bors. As we have seen, the Mormon Missionaries not only 
 asserted their power to work miracles, but appealed to them 
 as proofs of their mission. People suggested that if this was 
 really true, here was an opportunity of the best kind for 
 putting these pretensions to the test ; for every one knew 
 that there was no deception about the malady of Sister' 
 Armstrojig. 
 
 Themselves firmly believing *in what they taught, the 
 
ANOINTING THE SICK, 8 1 
 
 Elders desired nothing more than to be able to prove the 
 truth of their assertions, and declared their readiness to do 
 what was required of them. A proper time was appointed 
 when the relations and friends of the sick person should meet 
 together to intercede for her in solemn prayer, after which 
 they would anoint her with oil, as the Apostle James had 
 directed, and lay their hands upon her, that the prayer of 
 faith might save the sick, and God should raise her up. 
 
 The room was full of people. There were several of the 
 leading elders present, and also a goodly number of the 
 Saints, who naturally felt a deep interest in the result of 
 these proceedings ; besides these, the neighbors who, of 
 course, had heard what was going on, came and filled up the 
 room quite inconveniently. 
 
 A stranger would at once have been struck with the preval- 
 ence of that peculiar magnetic feeling which evidently influ- 
 enced all present. Eyen those who, as the poet says, came to 
 scoff, felt the same influence, as many afterwards acknowl- 
 edged. The elders surrounded the bed, and after a brief but 
 most earnest address from one of them, we all engaged in 
 prayer. The subject of the prayer can readily be supposed ; 
 but the earnestness — the intense, anxious, pleading of the 
 supplicants — no one could comprehend who had never been 
 present at such a scene. ■ 
 
 A bottle of oil was now brought out by the eldest daughter 
 of the invalid ; and three of the elders took it in their hands. 
 It was an Italian flask of very thin glass, covered with wicker, 
 and holding somewhat more than a pint. In taking hold of 
 it, the elders placed their fingers quite round it ; though, 
 where many assist in the consecration, I have seen them 
 simply touch it with their fingers. Then one of the elders 
 said : 
 
 " By virtue of the holy priesthood, and in the name of Jesus Christ; we con- 
 secrate this oil to the healing of all those who are sick and afflicted; that it may 
 remove all infirmities and impurities of the system. And may this oil, which 
 we dedicate especially to the healing of our afflicted sister, penetrate her to the 
 aiHicted parts, and give them new life and vigor, that she may be strengthened 
 and healed by the power of faith, and the laying on of hands, as commanded by 
 
82 EVIL SPIRITS CAST OUT. 
 
 thy servants in the last days;— for this especial purpose do we bless and conse- 
 crate this oil; in the name of Jesus Christ — Amen." 
 
 After this a large tablespoon was brought forth and filled 
 with the consecrated oil, which latter was poured down the 
 throat of the patient. She was then thoroughly anointed — 
 the oil not being appUed by the tip of the finger as in 
 " extreme unction," hnt poured upon her much after the fashion 
 described by King David when he says the precious fluid ran 
 down the beard of Aaron and saturated all his clothing. 
 
 The patient, however, was patient indeed. To her it was 
 no idle form. She was newly converted and her heart was 
 burning with zeal and faith. Perhaps the reader may think, 
 that this had much to do with the success of the operation, 
 as probably it had. However this might be, the elders, who. 
 while they anointed her had mingled prayers and benedic-, 
 tions above her head, now once more united in fervent suppli- 
 cation, and then laid their hands upon her, according- to the 
 letter of the Scripture. 
 
 There was something peculiar about this laying on of 
 hands. It was not a mere gentle touching, but a thorough 
 manipulation. The two hands were placed firmly on the top 
 of the head and then drawn energetically down the body- 
 while vigorous "passes" — as magnetizers call the action — 
 were made repeatedly over the affected parts. These prayers 
 and manipulations were made for very nearly three hours, 
 when the elders engaged in the work — for work it was — were 
 thoroughly exhausted. One of them then placing his right 
 hand on the head of the sufferer suddenly blessed her in the 
 name of the Lord, told her that her sins were forgiven her ; 
 that the evil spirits who had afflicted her were cast out ; that 
 the infirmity and disease which for five long years had kept her 
 bound upon the bed of sickness was rebuked, and would 
 torment her no more ; and bade her be strong in the faith and 
 be of good cheer, for God would raise her up. 
 
 Watching all this, as I was ; believing all this, as I did ; 
 my heart filled with joy at the manifestation of heavenly 
 power which I expected to witness, — I must nevertheless, 
 
■ FAITH TRIUMPHANT. 83 
 
 acknowledge that a feeling of wonder pervaded my mind 
 when I saw Sister Armstrong, who for so many years had 
 been unable even to turn in the bed by herself, stretch forth 
 her poor, bony arm, all unassisted, and say to one of the 
 elders — " Give me your hand, brother." 
 
 One of the brethren put forth his hand, and took hers, 
 saying as he did so : " Have faith ; have faith Sister Arm- 
 strong ; " — while the brother who had recently blessed her 
 repeated : " The prayer of faith shall save the sick, and God 
 shall raise him up ! " 
 
 Sister Armstrong, who an hour before could not, unaided, 
 have changed her position, now grasping the elder's hand, 
 raised herself up in the bed. She looked upon us with a smile 
 of triumph for a moment — ^faith was triumphant. But nature 
 asserted her immutable laws and the next instant the poor 
 sister sank gently back upon the pillows and closed her eyes. 
 We thought that she was dead. 
 
 The room was cleared of all but those immediately con- 
 nected with the sufferer, and I, on account of my new posi- 
 tion as Elder Stenhouse's wife, was allowed to remain. Sarah 
 and her younger sister applied such simple restoratives as 
 came conveniently to hand, and we were soon satisfied that 
 Sister Armstrong had only fainted ; and who could wonder at it } 
 
 I sat there, not far from the bed, lost in astonishment at 
 what I had seen, and wondering whether what Elder Bronson 
 had said was true — that in a day or two, at furthest, she 
 would be quite well. To me it was all a mystery. I knew 
 then nothing of the miraculous ppwer of faith— not religious 
 faith, but often just the reverse, which has so often relieved, 
 and cured diseases and infirmities which have bafl[led the: 
 power of the most skilful physicians. Moreover I knew 
 nothing then of that peculiar magnetic power which scientific 
 men now have proved belongs to certain constitutions and 
 can be used for curative purposes. So, in the childlike sim- 
 plicity of my heairt, I knelt down and thankfully poured forth 
 my gratitude to God that he had permitted me to witness 
 this wonderful manifestation of his power and love. 
 6 
 
S4 MARY burton's STORY. 
 
 As I rose from my knees, I saw standing just by me and 
 intently watching my movements, a young girl — little more 
 than a child — ^who was destined in after years to cross my path 
 more than once, and jvhose sisterly aifection I shall ever 
 cherish among the treasures of my heart. She wore a light 
 summer dress, with little or no ornament, and indeed she 
 needed none ; while on her head was a little coquettish hat of 
 the prettiest and most becoming style. Her hair was bright 
 and golden — such hair as I have never seen, except in pict- 
 ures and on one or two extremely rare occasions — and 
 her eyes, I could not tell the deep, deep love — the charm- 
 ing, engaging beauty which beamed from them. 
 
 The reader may perhaps think I am romancing a little, but 
 I do assure him that when I first saw that young girl in all 
 the heavenly beauty of budding maidenhood, I could hardly 
 persuade myself for a moment that I was not dreaming after 
 the fashion of some fairy story. Years passed away — years 
 of anxious cruel trial to us both, and now how changed we 
 are ! She then a pretty, gentle faerie queen ; I, a new-made 
 bride, hardly out of my teens. What are we both now ? 
 
 She came right up to me, and said, " Mrs. Stenhouse, you 
 don't know me, but I have seen you often, and I like you 
 very much — ^yes, and I want to talk to you." 
 
 " Yes, dear," I said, and I kissed her on both cheeks and 
 she looked pleased, — in her simplicity she thought it was a 
 great honor to be noticed by a missionary's wife. 
 
 Then we sat down together and she told-sae all about hei*- 
 self : — how her father was a wealthy man, a doctor in good 
 Ipractice and with property beside ; how he had a:ccidentally 
 ;met with a Mormon gentleman — a man of education and 
 position ; for many such joined the Church before the 
 blighting doctrine of polygamy was promulgated ; — how that 
 his arguments and Bible-proofs had been so convincing that 
 her father had been baptized and had cast in his lot among 
 the Saints ; — how that he, being called away on business, 
 had left her with a maiden aunt who did not belong to the 
 Mormon Church, and who would not let her come to see 
 
ELDER STENHOUSE WORKS A MIRACLE. 85 
 
 Sister Armstrong anointed ; and how she had quietly crept 
 out unnoticed, and would now have to return quite alone." 
 
 " No," I said, " I will, go with you and see you safe 
 home, but you must not come out> all by yourself in this 
 way again." 
 
 She kissed me, with a comical little smile dancing on her 
 lips, as much as to intimate that whatever I might sagely 
 suggest, she would, after all, be pretty certain to have her 
 own way. 
 
 I saw my young friend safely to her father's house, and 
 then I went home myself, thinking of her childish beauty 
 and winning ways, and pondering over what I had wit- 
 nessed. 
 
 The next morning Sarah called in to see us. She told' us 
 that her mother had had a calm and peaceful night, and had 
 been much refreshed ; that when she awoke she insisted upon 
 being washed and dressed and was now sitting up, with my 
 new acquaintance — Mary Burton — talking to her. I could 
 hardly believe this could be true, so I put on my bonnet and 
 went to see. 
 
 There, sure enough, was Sister Armstrong, very pale, and 
 evidently very weak, but quite another woman. No one could 
 have recognised her. The muscles of her face were, no longer 
 contracted, and she sat there straight enough for a woman of 
 her age. I could scarcely believe my eyes. The poor old 
 lady seemed glad to see me, and it did my heart good to hear 
 her talk of the mercies of God. 
 
 As we talked, Mary came near and put her hand in mine. 
 I stooped down and touched her cheek gently, and kissed her. 
 " You did not even tell me what your other name was, dear ?" 
 I asked. 
 
 " No, Sister Sterihouse ; but I told you everything else. 
 My name is Mary Bttrton" she replied, " hnt you must call me 
 only Mary." 
 
 I stooped down and kissed her again. That was my only 
 answer. 
 
 Then she arose from the stool on which she was sitting, 
 
86 CURING THE CHOLERA. 
 
 and said : " I must leave you for a' few minutes, please ; I 
 promised to go back directly I'd seen how Mrs. Armstrong 
 was ; but I'll return soon." And with a little whimsical nod 
 and an iniperative wave of the hand, she tripped away. 
 
 After this I saw plenty of the gift of healing and the 
 working of miracles. Some cases were not quite so success- 
 ful as that which I have described. Then we were told the 
 fault was in our want of faith. That cures were really affected, 
 no one who has been present on such occasions could possibly 
 doubt. That they were miracles in the sense in which we 
 generally use that term, I do not for a moment believe ; but I 
 think that in cases where the efforts of the elders were suc- 
 cessful, scientific enquiry would readily show that the effects 
 were only natural results of natural causes. 
 
 One brother — a deacon in the church — was suddenly at- 
 tacked with cholera. He sent immediately for Elder Sten- 
 house. It rnatters not what the disease may be, the same 
 means are employed. Young and old, of both sexes, are 
 treated alike ; — ^from measles to cholera morbus, from tooth- 
 ache to blindness, from whooping-cough to deafness ; and 
 from headache to " possession by devils " — the same prescrip- 
 tion serves for every one. And so satisfied are the Saints 
 that this is the only right way to effect a cure, that, until 
 very recently, to send for a physician would have been 
 accounted a sin — doubting the promises of God — want of 
 faith. 
 
 In the case of the deacon to whom I have just alluded, the 
 experiment was successful. Another missionary happened to 
 be in Southampton at that time, and he was with Elder Sten- 
 house when the messenger arrived. They were both much 
 surprised, for they had seen the sick man only an hour and a 
 half before, but they set off at once, and " found him in such a 
 state that he could hardly be recognised. 
 
 They immediately anointed him with oil, administering a 
 good dose internally ; then laid hands on him and prayed for 
 him ; but the cholera maintained its hold. The two Mission- 
 aries were full of zeal and were determined not to yield to the 
 
DISAPPOINTED EXPECTATIONS. 87 
 
 terrible disease ; from early evening to the following morning 
 at daybreak they continued to anoint the brother and to lay 
 hands on him, praying for his recovery probably thirty times 
 during the night. In their rough but expressive language, 
 they " had a regular battle." 
 
 Victory at length crowned their efforts : — the disease was 
 mastered ; but they themselves were utterly prostrated by the 
 physical and mental exertions of the night. , 
 
 The Saints regarded this as a great miracle ; but unbeliev- 
 ers would doubtless wonder why, if it was done by " the 
 power of God " — as the Elders asserted — it had cost so much 
 exertion on the part of man. I, however, simply state the 
 facts as they fell under my own observation ; and I may add 
 that, during that same night, in the same block of low 
 tenement buildings, five persons died of that dreadful 
 scourge. 
 
 On the following day, an enthusiastic sister came running to 
 Elder Stenhouse for him to come and lay hands upon her 
 husband who had also been attacked by the cholera. She 
 was a woman of great faith, or thought she was, and she had 
 no doubt that a wonderful miracle would be vvrought. Even 
 i^n the midst of the affliction at home she was perfectly jubil- 
 ant over the idea that the power of the priesthood would be 
 demonstrated. She had called in several of her neighbors 
 before the elders arrived, and they stood round the bed of 
 the sick man. 
 
 When the elders reached the house, the livid countenance 
 of the sufferer told plainly that he was* very far gone. Elder 
 Stenhouse laid his hands upon him in the usual way, but in- 
 stead of commanding the disease to depart, as it was expected 
 he would, he prayed that the afflicted brother himself might 
 pass away in 'peace. The head of the dying man instantly fell 
 back upon his pillow, and all was over. 
 
 The bereaved woman was almost petrified with surprise and 
 disappointment, and the unexpected change which had made 
 her a widow. Elder Stenhouse could only answer that there 
 was " no virtue in him ;" he had no faith at that moment to 
 
88 A mother's sorrow. 
 
 heal any one ; the former exercise of the gift had exhausted 
 him. There was, perhaps, more truth in his answer than he 
 himself imagined. 
 
 The poor woman of whom I have spoken must have been 
 greatly distressed when she saw the promise of miraculous 
 assistance upon which she had so confidently relied fail her 
 in such an unexpected manner. But she was not alone in her 
 disappointment. Many a man and woman who believed that 
 the laws of nature would be reversed and the decrees of the 
 Almighty set aside because their faith was strong and they 
 " expected " God to act in such and such a way, made ship- 
 wreck of their hopes as this poor woman did, upon the quickr 
 sands of a false expectation. 
 
 My husband and myself were invited to take tea at the 
 house of a brother in Southampton. The brother's name was 
 Isles, and he and his wife had a child who had been very seri- 
 ously ill for nearly three weeks. Mr. Stenhouse had frequently 
 " administered " to him by the laying on of hands. On the 
 evening to which I allude the child appeared to be much bet- 
 ter,, and he even sat up to the tea-table, perched, child-like, 
 upon his high chair and in accordance with his own ear- 
 nest request. We all thought that he was doing very nicely. 
 
 After tea, and just when we were about to leave. Sister 
 Isles said : " Brother Stenhouse^ please lay your hands upon 
 my babe, and ask the Lord to bless him, that he may have a 
 refreshing sleep to-night. My husband complied, and began 
 by praying that the child might rest well, — when, suddenly, as 
 if by an irresistible impulse he implored that the child might 
 die easily and without pain. I instinctively glanced at the 
 mother, and our eyes met. She looked as if frozen to the 
 heart ; and in a moment we knew that the child was dying,— 
 not painfully, but calmly and peacefully, as if he were going 
 to sleep. The poor mother wept piteously ; but my hus- 
 band bade her not trouble the last moments of the dying 
 child. 
 
 In a few moments all was over ; and I — and probably the 
 mother, too — asked mentally; — if this also is the age of mir- 
 
FAITH GIVES PLACE TO THE DOCTOR. 89 
 
 acles — " is the Lord's hand shortened that He cannot save, 
 or His ear heavy that He will not hear?" We had yet to 
 learn that the thoughts of God are beyond the comprehen- 
 sion of man. 
 
 Since those times when the spirit of enthusiasm and relig- 
 ious zeal animated the Mormon missionaries and teachers, and 
 stirred up the Saints who listened to them to emulate in faith- 
 fulness the Christians of the Early Church, a great change 
 has come over everything connected with the doctrines which 
 were then taught and practiced. 
 
 Several years after the occurrence of the events which I 
 have just narrated, when we had been for a considerable time 
 resident in Salt Lake City, our faith in the miraculous gift of 
 healing was still so strong that we suffered one of our children 
 to lie almost at the door of death before we would dare to call 
 in medical assistance, and when, at length, love for our suffer- 
 ing child overcame, to a certain extent, our scruples, it was 
 under protest and with many an effort to silence the voice of a 
 falsely-accusing conscience, that my husband reluctantly went 
 for the physician. 
 
 Now — so great are the changes which the influx of Gentiles 
 and more intimate contact with the advanced civilisation of the 
 age have produced — there is not one of the most pious leaders 
 of the Church — including Brother Brigham (who but a very 
 little while ago denounced such a course as the first step 
 towards rank apostasy) — who would not call in, if it appeared 
 needful, the very best medical assistance — whether Mormon 
 or Gentile — which could be procured. And yet Brigham, 
 despite his notorious inconsistencies, lays claim to an " Infalli- 
 ble Priesthood ! " 
 
 The Saints, in theory, still cling to the first teachings of the 
 Church ; but, if the truth must be told, not only does " iniquity 
 abound," but " the love of many has waxed cold." 
 
CHAPTER VI. 
 
 THE FIRST WHISPERINGS OF POLYGAMY. 
 
 Meeting a Living "Apostle" — The London Conference — What I Expected— 
 Four Apostles at One Time — The Charms of a Priestly Life — Leading About 
 a " Sister "—The " Mystery of Godliness" — Imitating Solomon— The Form- 
 ation of a " Branch " — Doing the Work of the Lord — The Apostle Lorenzo 
 Snow — An Argument by the Way — Silent Snow — The Apostle Snow Thaws 
 at the Right Time — How a Convenient Revelation was Thrice Received — 
 Unwilling Consent — A Cruel Wrong — He Would be Five Years Away — The 
 Conference Organised — A Mission to Italy — A Pleasant Position for a Wife — 
 The Vicissitudes of a Year — God's Mercy a Safe Trust — A Valedictory Pic- 
 nic — Not Far From Netley Abbey — Bidding Good-bye to the Missionaries — 
 My Ideas of My Husband's Work — Mary Suggests a New Idea — ^What She 
 Said— "I'm Not a Little Girl "— " I Kissed Her, and Continued"— All, all 
 False — Elder Stenhouse Departs for Italy — Italy is the End of Our Miserable 
 Hopes — How the Missionaries Departed — I Bid Adieu to My Husband. 
 
 ABOUT three months after our marriage it was rumored 
 that four of the Twelve Apostles had been appointed to 
 foreign missions, and were then on their way to England. 
 
 The Saints in Britain had been for several years without 
 any missionaries direct from the body of the church, and the 
 announcement of this foreign mission was hailed with joy. 
 
 I confess to experiencing much pleasure at the thought of 
 becoming acquainted with a living Apostle. How often in my 
 girlhood I had wished that I had lived when men inspired of 
 God walked the earth. What a joy, I thought, it would have 
 been to, have listened to the wisdom of such teachers. Now 
 the time was near when I shoidd realise all the happiness of 
 my day-dreams — when I should really have the privilege of 
 conversing with those chosen men of God. The invitation, 
 therefore, to meet the conference in London on the first of 
 June, was very welcome intelligence. 
 
THE LONDON CONFERENCE. QI 
 
 It must not, however, be supposed that I expected to find 
 in them anything which would place them out of the ordinary 
 pale of humanity. I knew that the Apostles of our Lord were 
 very ordinary men, who in their day pursued the common 
 avocations of life. Their charm and glory consisted only in 
 the fact that the spirit of God rested upon them, guiding 
 them in all their ways. These men who now were coming to 
 England were, I firmly believed, as true Apostles as any who 
 ever saw Christ in the flesh ; but they, like the chosen ones 
 of old, had also the gift of inspiration, and were consecrated 
 and set apart specially, by direct revelation from on high, to 
 perform a great and glorious work. But though I did not 
 expect to find them differ, either in appearance or in ordinary 
 conversation, much from their brethren, I expected to find in 
 them grave and very earnest men, and I certainly did experi- 
 ence a sense of disappointment when, in all their conversa- 
 tion and in all their doings, I found that American Prophets 
 and Apostles were, after all, very much like other men. 
 
 We went to the London Conference — my husband and I — 
 and there for the first time I met with Apostles, who were also 
 Prophets, and Priests, and High-priests, and Teachers, and 
 Elders, and Deacons — all assembled in solemn convocation. 
 
 The four Apostles whom I met at that time were John Tay-i 
 lor, Lorenzo Snow, Erastus Snow, and Franklin D. Richards 
 : — pleasant and agreeable men, and withal very fair specimens 
 of Mormon missionaries, who had found favor in the eyes of 
 / Brigham Young and of the leaders in Zion, and who had 
 been promoted accordingly. They lived comfortably, wore 
 the finest broadcloth, fashionably cut, and were not averse to 
 gold chains, and charms, and signet-rings, and other personal 
 adornments. They put on no particular airs, were as polite 
 ' and attentive to ladies as gentlemen always are, and could go 
 to a theatre or any other place of amusement without hesita- 
 tion. I afterwards discovered that in one particular, at least, 
 if not in all, they resembled the early Apostles, for they too 
 could, like St. Paul, " lead about a sister " without any com- 
 punctions of conscience. 
 
92 LEADING ABOUT A SISTER. 
 
 At that time I had not become acquainted with the Mor- 
 mon "mystery of godliness," and was far from suspecting 
 these pleasant American Apostles of having even the slightest 
 inclination to imitate King Solomon or the patriarchs in their 
 domestic habits. That was to be a discovery of later date. 
 
 I do not care to describe this London Conference, as it was 
 very much like any other meeting of the same kind. It had 
 been specially called for the purpose of welcoming the four 
 newly-arrived Apostles. Saints from every part of Britain 
 were assembled, and a good deal 'of enthusiasm was mani- 
 fested. Hymns and prayers were interspersed with speeches, 
 and business details of all kinds were fully entered into. 
 
 The Southampton Saints had hitherto formed only a branch 
 of the London Conference, but did not form a conference of 
 their own. It was now resolved that since so large a number 
 had recently been baptized in Hampshire, the several branches 
 of the church there should be organised into a special confer- 
 ence at Southampton, with Elder Stenhouse as its president ; 
 and the Sunday following was appointed for that purpose, 
 when the Apostle Snow, en route to Italy — to which country 
 he had just been appointed missionary — would honor the 
 ocpasion with his presence. 
 
 As we returned, some gentlemen in 'the same railway car- 
 riage, to while away the time, I suppose, entered into a relig- 
 ious discussion. What the subject was I do not now remem-' 
 ber, but I can rejcollect that a good deal was said as to which 
 of all the numerous Christian sects really possessed divine 
 authority. Elder Stenhouse took an active part in the argu- 
 ment, and being, like all the Mormon missionaries at that 
 time, very well posted in Scriptural discussions, he attracted 
 considerable attention, and was much complimented by sev- 
 eral persons present. 
 
 The Apostle Lorenzo Snow was silent all the time, but he 
 took note of all that passed. Elder Stenhouse was a man of 
 great zeal and untiring energy— qualities in which perhaps 
 Brother Snow felt himself a little deficient ; and he was going 
 on a mission which required unflagging devotion and perse- 
 
SENT ON A MISSION TO ITALY. 93 
 
 verance. We had not been an hour at home, before he told 
 my husband that the Lord had thrice revealed to him that he 
 should accompany him to Italy ! How often — even while I 
 still clung to Mormonism — did it appear strange to me that 
 the " revelations " of distinguished Saints should so fre- 
 quently coincide with their own personal wishes, and come 
 at such convenient times. 
 
 I had laid aside my travelling dress, and was hastening to 
 provide some refreshment for the Apostle, when my husband 
 came and told me of the revelation which had been so oppor-t 
 tunely received. I was at that time as much an enthusiast as 
 Elder Stenhouse himself, and I felt honored that my husband 
 should be the first English elder appointed to a foreign mis- 
 sion. Here was the fulfilment of my ambition that we 
 should be in the forefront of the battle, and should obtain 
 distinction as zealous servants of God. But at what a cost 
 was this ambition purchased ! My poor, weak heart sickened 
 at the thought — I had been but four months married. 
 
 When the Apostle asked me if I were willing that Elder 
 Stenhouse should go to Italy, I answered " Yes," though I 
 felt that my heart would break. I remembered that in my 
 first transport of joy and gratitude after being baptized, I had 
 made a covenant with the Lord that I would do anything 
 which he might require of me, and I dared not rebel or break 
 that vow. Oh, the agony that fell upon my young heart ; it 
 seemed that the weight of a mountain rested upon it when I 
 was told that my husband might be five years absent. He 
 had already been five years a travelling elder, without a home, 
 trusting for daily bread to the voluntary kindness of the 
 Saints. He had labored faithfully, and looked forward to the 
 day when his "conference" should be established, and he 
 could count upon an improvement in his temporal position, 
 and an early call to emigrate to Zion. In the few months 
 that I had been his wife, it was only natural that I should 
 share his hopes ; but just at the moment when they were 
 about to be realised, hopes and expectations were scattered to 
 the winds. 
 
94 "VHOMME PROPOSE ET DIEU DISPOSE,." 
 
 On the following day the Saints assembled, the Southamp- 
 ton Conference was organised, and Elder Stenhouse elected 
 its president. Ten minutes later he was publicly appointed 
 by the Apostle on a mission to Italy. 
 
 In one short year what changes I had seen. I had relin- 
 quished a happy home in France and forsaken the friends of 
 my youth ; I had set aside an alliance that promised wealth 
 . and honor, to embrace a faith that was everywhere ridiculed, 
 and to cast in my lot among a people universally regarded as 
 dupes and fools ; I had married a missionary elder who could 
 offer me nothing but toil and privation ; and now to complete 
 the changes of an eventful year, my husband was about to 
 leave me — probably for five years, and in fact it was very pos-. 
 sible that I might never see him again. All this for faith — a 
 faith no doubt mistaken, but certainly sincere. 
 
 During the few days which intervened between the time 
 when Elder Stenhouse received his appointment, to the hour 
 of his departure, I enjoyed but little of his society. Arrang-,: 
 ing the affairs of the conference which he was leaving, and 
 preparation for his mission, fully occupied his attention. I 
 do riot think we either of us uttered a word, when alone 
 together, respecting the future that was before us. It was 
 probably better that we did not. There are moments of our 
 life when silence is better than speech, and it is safer to trust , 
 in the mercy of 'God than try to shape our own destiny. 
 
 The Saints are noted for the fraternal spirit which exists" 
 among them. There are, of course, exceptions ; but, as a rule, 
 every Mormon is willing to help his brother in the faith, act- 
 ing upon' the principle, "One is your Master, even Christ: 
 and all ye are brethren." The Southampton Saints were no 
 exception to this rule, but showed their kindness both to my 
 husband and myself in a thousand little ways. I have spoken 
 of my I unhappiness during that week of preparation, but I 
 must not forget that there were gleams of hope in the dark-,i 
 ness. One occasion I shall never forget — a pic-nic which our 
 friends held as a kind of valedictory feast in honor of the 
 missionaries — of Elder Stenhouse in particular. 
 
A PARTING PIC-NIC AT BITTERN. 95 
 
 Right up the Southampton River, not' far from Netley 
 Abbey, is a pleasant and picturesque spot named Bittern, 
 which I need not too particularly describe, although the 
 memory of its beauty recalls recollections of mingled sadness 
 and pleasure to my mind. There my parents now lived, and 
 thither it was proposed our friends should go. They could 
 obtain all they needed for the pic-nic at my father's house, 
 and we could take our good things into the woods and enjoy 
 ourselves as we pleased. We had a very happy time — ^for the. 
 moment, even / forget the cloud that was hanging over me, 
 and our dear friends not only enjoyed themselves to the 
 utmost, but seemed bent upon making the time pass pleas- 
 antly to everyone else. 
 
 I had been talking to Sister White about the recent doings 
 of the Saints, the establishment of the conference and the 
 sending away of Elder Stenhouse. I wanted Sister White, as 
 in fact I wanted everyone else, to think that I was perfectly 
 happy in the separation, and that I counted my feelings as 
 a wife as nothing when placed in the balance against my duty 
 as a missionary, and I tried to impress upon her how proud I 
 was that my husband should be the first English Elder 
 entrusted with a foreign mission. We talked together a great 
 deal. She was still quite a young woman, though married, 
 and the mother of four darling little children ; but probably 
 she had a better experience than I had and could see through 
 my attempts to stifle my natural feelings, while at the same 
 time she sympathised with me. She spoke very kindly to 
 me ; and as we talked, we wandered inadvertently away from 
 the rest. of the party. Suddenly she thought of her little boy, 
 and, mother-like, thinking he might be in danger, ran off to 
 find where he was, promising to come back immediately. 
 
 I sat down upon the grass to await her return. I was 
 somewhat excited by the conversation which had passed 
 between us ; but as I sat musing my agitation began to cool 
 down and I was soon lost in thought and did not notice that 
 I was not alone. 
 
 I did not hear the light footsteps near me, and did not see 
 
96 FIRST WHISPERINGS OF POLYGAMY. 
 
 my fairy friefid, as I called her, pass between me and the sun. 
 But a tiny hand was laid gently on my shoulder, and looking 
 up I saw the loving eyes of Mary Burton looking straight 
 down into mine. 
 
 " Where have you been, dear ? " I asked, " Why, I have 
 hardly seen you all the day." 
 
 " But I knew you were here," she said, " and I thought you 
 were alone-^and I wanted to see you and talk with you." 
 
 " Come and sit down beside me, Mary," I said, " and let us 
 have a little chat together." Then I drew her gently towards 
 me, and she sat down by my side. For a few moments we 
 said nothing, but I was watching her, and waiting to hear 
 what she -wfould say. She seemed such a pretty, such a 
 sweet and gentle girl — more like one of those little birds of 
 glorious plumage and thrilling song that we see glittering 
 among the dew-drops and the dancing leaves, than a child of 
 earth. And I pitied her for her beauty, for such beauty is a 
 snare ; and I wondered whether her innocent soul was as fair 
 and glorious before God as her face was sweet to me ; and I 
 asked whether, in years to come, when the glory of her child- 
 ish radiance had passed away, the brightness of a soul pure 
 Etnd serene would lend a new beauty to her features — the 
 beauty not of childish innocence but of a noble womanhood. 
 
 I took her hand in mine, and asked her some trifling ques- 
 tion ; but she did not answer. Suddenly she looked up full 
 into my face and said, " Sister StenLouse ; I'm very, very sorry 
 for you." 
 
 " Sorry for me, dear ? " I said, " Why should you be sorry .' 
 I am not sad." 
 
 " You shouldn't say so," she replied, " you know in your 
 heart you are sad, although you don't say so. It's a fine 
 thing, no doubt, for Elder Stenhouse to go away, though for 
 my part I'd rather stop at home if I loved any one there, and," 
 at-any-rate, you must feel sorry that he is going away so far, 
 if you love him." 
 
 "But Mary," I said, "you know it is his duty to go, and he 
 has been called to it by the Apostle, and it is a great honor." 
 
A STORY THAT WAS TOLD IN SECRET. 97 
 
 " Oh yes, I know that," she replied — " I know that." Then 
 we relapsed into silence for some few moments. Presently- 
 drawing nearer to me, she said again quite suddenly, " Sister 
 Stenhouse, do you know the meaning of the word Polygamy !" 
 
 "Why, what a funny question to ask me, child!" I ex- 
 claimed. 
 
 " Child, you call me, Sister Stenhouse, but I'm not a child — 
 at least not quite a child — I shall be fifteen next birthday." 
 
 " Well dear," I said, " I did not mean to offend you ; and 
 I call you ' child' because I love you ; but you asked' me such 
 a strange question and used such a strange word." 
 
 This was quite true, for at that time the word Polygamy 
 was as seldom used as the word ' polyandry,' or any other 
 word signifying a state of things with which we have nothing 
 to do. 
 
 " I'm not offended," she said, " only people have a way of 
 treating me as if I were only such a very little girl : — I sup- 
 pose I look so." 
 
 She certainly did look so, and I suppose she read my 
 thoughts. Womanhood, by and by, brought to her more of 
 reality both in face and figure as well as in the terrible facts 
 of life ; but at that time the term " little fairy," which I have 
 so often used respecting her, seemed the most appropriate. 
 The meaning of that terrible word " Polygamy " she under- 
 stood, in later years, fully as well as I did. 
 
 "Well dear," I said, "Why did you ask me that strange 
 question .' " 
 
 " You must promise not to be angry with me if I tell you," 
 she answered, " and yet I think you ought to know." 
 
 I readily promised — what could I have refused her ? — and 
 she said : 
 
 " The other day two of the Sisters were at our house — I 
 may not tell you their names for fear of making mischief — 
 and they were talking together between themselves and did 
 not notice that I was present — or else they didn't care. And 
 I heard one of them tell the other that she had heard secretly 
 that in Zion men were allowed to have many wives, and she 
 
98 , "SHE WAS NOT CONVINCED." 
 
 used that word "Polygamy" very ofteii, and said that was 
 what the people of the world called it." 
 
 " Well, Mary dear," I replied, " that is no great secret. We 
 have all heard that said before. Wicked people who hate the 
 Gospel say that, and a great deal more, in order to bring 
 scandal upon the Church ; but of course it isn't true." 
 
 "Ah, but I haven't told you all," she said, " the sisters had 
 a long talk about it and they explained who they heard it 
 from, and it was from no one outside the Church ; and then 
 one of them said that Elder Stenhouse had heard all about it 
 and knew it was true, only of course he did not talk about 
 such things yet ; but that the time would come when every- 
 one would acknowledge it, and all .the Saints would have 
 many wives. I was frightened when I heard this, and very 
 angry — for I thought of you — and I spoke to her and said it 
 was . all untrue and I'd ask Elder Stenhouse ; and they 
 scolded me very much for saying so, and said it was very 
 wicked for a child to listen, and that was why I did not like 
 you to call me ' child.' " 
 
 " Well darling," I said, " I'll not offend you any more in 
 that way — and it was very good of you to tell me anything 
 you thought I ought to know." Then I kissed her, and con- 
 tinued : " But, after all, I don't think it's of any consequence. 
 It's the old scandal, just as in the early days they said wicked 
 things of Christ and His apostles. Elder Stenhouse knows all 
 that people say, but he has told me again and again that there 
 is. not a word of truth in it, and I believe him." 
 
 " You think so. Sister Stenhouse," she replied, " and I sup- 
 pose I ought to think so too, but if it's all false how did 
 people first begin to think of it .' People don't say that the 
 Mormons are murderers or thieves, because we have given 
 them no reason to think so. Then why should they think of 
 such an unheard-of thing as Polygamy — surely there must 
 have been some reason. Don't you think so .' " 
 
 " No, dear," I answered, " Elder Stenhouse says that some 
 very wicked men have sometimes joined the Church, and 
 have done all manner of shocking things, so that they had to 
 
DEPARTURE OF THE MISSIONARIES : — I AM LEFT ALONE. 99 
 
 be cut off, and then they went about trying to make other 
 people believe that the Mormons were as wicked as they 
 were. There was John C. Bennett who lived a frightful life 
 at Nauvoo, and then tried to make out that Joseph Smith 
 was as bad as he was. And Marsh, the president of the 
 twelve apostles, and Orson Hyde, when they apostatised not 
 only said bad things of Joseph, but took affidavit and swore 
 solemnly before the magistrates that the prophet had been 
 guilty of the most fearful crimes." 
 
 I kissed her again, and she said, " Well, perhaps you are 
 right " ; but I could see that in her heart she was not 
 convinced. 
 
 Then we talked of ourselves and all that interested us, and 
 she told me all her childish hopes and ambitions ; and to me — 
 young as I was myself — it was pleasant to listen to her in- 
 nocent prattle. She promised to come and see me when 
 Elder Stenhouse had gone and I should be left alone ; and 
 when we got back to the rest of the party we were as firm 
 friends as if we had known each other a lifetime. 
 
 At midnight, Saturday, June 15th, 1850, the steamer left 
 Southampton for Havre-de-Grace, bearing on board the first 
 two Mormon Missionaries to Italy — one of them was my 
 husband. 
 
 The Saints had called in the ■ evening to bid Elder Sten-. 
 house good-bye, and as he was, of course, to travel "without 
 purse or scrip," they vied with each other in showing their 
 appreciation of his position and his devotion to the faith. 
 The poorest among them would not be denied the privilege 
 of contributing their mites to aid in the conversion of the 
 Italians, and none of the brethren felt that they could show too 
 much kindness to the departing missionary. Just in this way 
 have all the foreign missions of the Mormon Church been 
 projected and sustained ; the elements of success were always 
 present — devotion and self-abnegation on the part of the 
 missionaries, and an earnest, self-sacrificing disposition on the 
 part of the people, commanding respect, however erroneous 
 or foolish the foundation of their faith. 
 7 
 
lOO THE LORD WILL PROVIDE. 
 
 In the bustle of departure, Mr. Stenhouse seemed never to 
 have thought about himself, and certainly he made no prepara- 
 tion for me. I had full confidence in him, however, and loved 
 him devotedly, and knew that my love was returned. But 
 men who look for miracles, and count upon special providen- 
 ces for daily bread, are not generally very prudent or far- 
 seeing in their domestic arrangements. Elder Stenhouse had 
 been told that "the Lord would provide," and it therefore 
 seemed to him superfluous that he should interfere ; it would 
 have been a lack of faith to have shown too much interest in 
 what might become of me. He left me with only £i. 
 
 I now realised the loneliness of my position, — there was no 
 earthly friend to whom I could turn for sympathy at a time 
 like this. Before my Heavenly Father alone I could pour out 
 the bitterness of my soul and all my griefs, and in, His pres- 
 ence weep and pray. 
 
CHAPTER VII. 
 
 MY HtrSBAND'S MISSION :— I AM LEFT ALONE. 
 
 * 
 
 The Italian Mission — A Saint's Responsibility — Obliging a Friend — The 
 Pains and Penalties of a Saintly Life — My Letters to my Husband — The 
 Whisperings of the Coming Storm — Polygamy Denied — ^The Wretched Sub- 
 terfuges of Certain Elders — The Lying Basis of Polygamy — What Apostle 
 Taylor said — My Personal Experience — How Polygamy was Introduced 
 among the Saints — I want to find My own Groove— Suffering for Con- 
 science Sake — Lonely Contemplation of a Weary Soul — The American Apos- 
 tles— " Without Purse or Scrip",— The Swiss Mission— My own Enthusi- 
 asm—My Darling Clara— Lighting the " load" of Love — Mary Burton's Love 
 Affairs — The Apostle Lorenzo Snow — Missionary Work — I Bear my own 
 Troubles Alone — The Difficulties of Missionary Work— A Shoemaker who 
 respected his Soul — Work Indefatigable — 1£ Govemeur d6 L' Hflpital — 
 Our New Convert — Days of Poverty — Practical Faith — How we Endured — 
 The Darkness which Proceeds the Dawn — The Suffering of all who Work 
 to Win. 
 
 WHEN the Apostle Snow called upon Mr. Stenhouse to 
 go to Italy, the Saints willingly accepted the responsi- 
 bility of providing for me during his absence. 
 
 They thought it was more an honor than a burden to have 
 this charge committed to them ; but it was very humiliating to 
 me to be placed in such a position, however anxious they 
 might be to assist me and to serve the general cause. To 
 face opposition or to give my all for my religion, I was willing 
 indeed ; but to depend upon others for my daily bread was 
 utterly repugnant to my feelings, although, of course, if the 
 Church sent away my husband, whose proper place and duty 
 it was to support his family, it was only right that the mem- 
 bers of that Church should undertake the responsibility. But 
 
102 A MORMON MISSIONARY S WIFE. 
 
 then, and at many other times during my life, I have learned ' 
 the truth of Christ's precept " It is more blessed to give than 
 to receive." 
 
 The American Apostle was not without worldly wisdom 
 when he proposed that an unmarried man should be appointed 
 to preside over the Southampton conference, as his wants 
 would be few. But Mr. Stenhouse had been solicited by a 
 friend who had d w'ile and children, to secure his appoint- 
 ment, and with ready confidence in that friend, he overlooked 
 his own interests and my welfare, and I was IdEt to pass 
 through trials and privations which I can never forget. 
 
 The Saints were very kind, and took pleasure in doing dll 
 they could for nie ; but the mistake which my husband com- 
 mitted in leaving his friend to succeed him as president of the 
 conference was soon apparent. The ' friend ' thought of his 
 own family first, and the family required all that the Saints 
 could reasonahly be expected to contribute, and even then 
 they had not enough. I therefore received only such little 
 sums as could be withheld from them, and to make the 
 matter worse those who had any property or estate were 
 counselled to sell all and "gather to Zipn." The more weal- 
 thy Saints were soon gone, and the current expenses of the 
 church fell heavily upon those who were hardly able to sup- 
 port their own families. 
 
 They tried to send me sotnething every week, and I hai^e 
 no doubt they did send me all that they could. When their 
 contributions reached four or five shillings (about j^i) I 
 thought myself fortunate ; more often I did not receive the 
 value of fifty cents in the whole week, at times less, and some- 
 times nothing at all. That unfailing comfort to respectablfe 
 Eiiglish poverty — a Cup of tea— was my greatest luxury, but 
 at times far wteeks together I had not even that ; I had no- 
 thing but bread — but I never fcOmplained. 
 
 Whenever it was possible I concealed my true situation 
 from every one, and in my almost daily letters to my husband 
 not a shadow of a hint was ever dropped relative to my own 
 t)riVatioris. I wanted him to be successful in his mission, 
 
A DECEITFUL "APOSTLE "^POLYGAMY DENIED. I03 
 
 and I feared that his energy would desert him if he knew of my 
 difficulties. I was in extreme poverty, certainly, but for my- 
 self I was not in trouble. God would provide for me, I felt, 
 and it was glorious to suffer in a sacred cause. 
 
 But darker days — days of severer trial, were creeping slowly 
 near me. Up to this time I had worshipped God and loved 
 my hushand with a perfect heart. Now the dark shadow of 
 an accursed thing was looming in the distance, but approach- 
 ing surely if slowly. The strange suggestions made by dar- 
 ling little Mary Burton at the pic-nic, were not the first 
 whisperings that I Tiad heard of a probable change in our 
 faith and practice respecting marriage; though I did not care 
 to tell her so. Others had spoken in my presence of the 
 same subject, but I had not believed them. I had ques- 
 tioned my husband, and his answers had reassured me. 
 
 Although Polygamy was utterly denied by the Missionaries 
 in Europe, yet long before it was openly avowed a great deal' 
 was written and said on the subject. Joseph Smith, whatever 
 he said and did in private, always denied it in public, and after 
 his death the leaders of the Church folbwed his example. 
 In some way, however, an idea had got abroad that the Mor- 
 mons were somewhat unsound respecting the marriage ques- 
 tion. Still the elders stoutly denied the charge, and the 
 more they were accused the more strenuous became their 
 denials. 
 
 At a public discussion at Boulogne-sur-mer in France, the 
 Apostle John Taylor, in reply to the accusations of Polygamy 
 which were brought against him, said : 
 
 " We are accused here of actions the most indelicate and disgusting, such 
 as none but a corrupt and depraved heart could have contrived. These things 
 
 were too outrageous to admit of belief. I shall content myself- 
 
 with quoting our views of chastity and marriage from a work published iby us, 
 containing some of our articles of faith — Doctrine andCovenants." 
 
 He then proceeded to quote from the Book of Doctrine and 
 Covenants " such passages as the following : — 
 
 " Marriage is ordained by God unto man ; wherefore it is lawful that he 
 should have one wife, and they twain should be one flesh, [p. 218]. 
 
104 THE FLIRTATIONS OF A DISTINGUISHED ELDER. 
 
 He quoted many other things also, among which might be 
 enumerated the following : 
 
 " Thou shalt love thy wife with all thy heart, and shalt deave unto her, 
 and none else." 
 
 He quoted also many other passages of Scripture which had 
 reference to the subject; — each powerful to put aside even 
 the idea of polygamy ; and each equally powerful as an argu- 
 ment against polygamy itself. 
 
 Let the reader here note the value of what Mormons say 
 when their faith is called in question : — See and judge : — 
 
 Brother Taylor, who spoke at that meeting, and utterly 
 denied polygamy, had himself — at that very moment when he 
 so atrociously perjured himself and when he swore that no 
 Mormon had more than one vi\i&—Jive wives living in Salt 
 Lake City : One of his friends there present had two wives ; 
 and the other was married to a mother and her own 
 daughter ! 
 
 Any conclusion, any expression of disgust at these abomin-^ 
 ations and deliberate perjuries, I leave to the reader. 
 
 Among those who came to see Mr. Stenhouse before he 
 left for Italy, was Elder Margetts, an English elder of some 
 prominence in the British mission." At the pic-nic, of which 
 I have already spoken, I noticed that this elder was more than 
 usually attentive to a pretty young sister who was also pres- 
 ent. There was always an affectionate familiarity among the 
 Saints ; as I previously mentioned, they were like brothers 
 and sisters, and addressed each other as such. But the atten- 
 tions of the elder I speak of pointed a little beyond all this. 
 He could not, perhaps, be accused of any open impropriety, 
 but he certainly looked much more like the girl's lover than 
 an ordinary friend or her spiritual adviser. 
 
 I knew this Elder's family in London, and his conduct 
 pained me a good deal. So I drew the attention of my hus- 
 band to the circumstance, and he said the Elder was foolish 
 but he would speak to them both ; and this he did. 
 
 After the departure of the missionaries, this elder remained 
 for several days. He then returned to London, but it was not 
 
PREPARING THE WAY FOR THE NEW DOCTRINE. I05 
 
 long before he was again in Southampton, and he still paid 
 marked attention to the same young sister. This caused un- 
 pleasant remarks among the Saints, who at this time cer- 
 tainly did not believe that polygamy was practiced in 
 Utah. 
 
 At a later date this Elder, with some others, was again in 
 Southampton, and I was invited to take tea with them at the 
 house of one of the Saints. . In the course of the evening 
 there was a general conversation on " the work of the Lord," 
 in which I, of course, was greatly interested. 
 
 Whenever g.ny of* the missionaries were visiting, the Saints 
 would seek their society just like children who were glad to 
 meet again their parents after a long absence ; and at such 
 times they were at liberty to ask what questions they pleased. 
 On the evening I speak of, I well remember that the general 
 subject of conversation was the apostasy of the Christian 
 Church from the true order of God's salvation. Prominence 
 was given to the history of Abraham and his descendants, and 
 occasional allusion was made to their marital relations ; but 
 nothing directly was spoken. It was very evident that these 
 elders only wanted to drop a word or two here and there to 
 suit those who wanted it, but nevertheless they spoke so ob- 
 scurely and mysteriously that they could easily have retracted 
 what was said if any one had accused them of teaching a doc- 
 trine which they were unwilling openly to avow. 
 
 When I returned home that night I was fully satisfied that 
 the Elder I have spoken of had a reason for his frequent visits. 
 to Southampton, and shortly after, the young sister went to 
 London. Whether Polygamy was ever to be a doctrine of the 
 Church or not, it was very clear to me that the London Elder 
 was a polygamist at heart. The more my mind dwelt on 
 these things, the more sick at heart did I become, and faint 
 and weary. 
 
 I had, however, personal cares and trials enough to engage 
 my attention. I found that I could not depend upon the 
 Saints to provide me with even the barest necessaries of life, 
 so I looked about me and made enquiries for some light emt- 
 
100 TRIALS OF A SAD AND LONELY WIFE, 
 
 ployment by which I might support myself. My health at 
 that time would not have allowed me to do much, but for a 
 long tijtne I could not get anything at all to do. I had, of 
 course, been used to teaching, but employment of that kind it 
 was just then impossible for me to take, even if I could haye 
 got it ; the only resource which seemed left to me was to 
 find occupation for my needle, and it was a long and weary 
 time before I could obtain even this. 
 
 At length I, got a little plain sewing to do, and out of the 
 miserable pittance thus earned I contrived to pay my rent and 
 provide a few necessaries ; but at times that ~too was beyond 
 my power, and I have gone a fortnight at a time with nothing 
 to eat but dry bread. Still my faith never failed. And thus 
 the weary days passed by. 
 
 Now, however, a new interest began to gather round my life, 
 for I expected before the end of the year the arrival of a little 
 stranger to share my affections and my care. Thi-s certainly 
 was a sad beginning of domestic bliss, but still the thought 
 was pleasant to me. I had at that time no one to aid me or 
 comfort me. The Saints were very kind, but they could not 
 supply the place of an absent husband. My dearest friend, 
 Mary Burtan, used to come as often as she could to see me, 
 and her presence was like a gleam of sunshine ; but she was 
 so young, and innocent, and happy that I had not the heart to 
 trouble her with my sorrows. All my jewelry and trinkets 
 and the greater part of my wardrobe had gone in providing for 
 my daily wants and in preparing those necessary trifles upon 
 which a young mother bestows so much loving care. My 
 health was daily -failing, and sometimes I doubted if I should 
 ever be well and strong again. But all that I suffered was for 
 the Church, and that thought sustained me. 
 
 Often I would sit alone and think — think of the past and 
 all my early day-dreams of love, and hope, and bliss ; think of 
 my husband in a far-off land devoting his life and all his ener- 
 gies to the preaching of the latter-day glory ; think of those 
 whisperings of that accursed doctrine which has since brought 
 desolation and anguish to the hearts of so many weary women; 
 
THE MISSIONARY IN ITALY. lO/ 
 
 think of my future liiie, dark as its promise even then ap- 
 peared. 
 
 Sometimes I heard from Italy, heard how my husband was 
 progressing with his work, and with wifely love I sympathised 
 with him in all his difficulties, for he told me how arduous the 
 task was in which he was engaged. 
 
 It was not the expectation of the Mormon Apostles that the 
 missionaries would do much in Catholic Italy. The same 
 causes were in operation there as affected the work in France. 
 Few, if any, really good Roman Catholics have ever joined the 
 Saints. The Irish Mission was never successful, and the same 
 may be said of the French and Italian Missions. In France 
 and Italy by far the greater part of the people might be classed 
 under two heads — Roman Catholics, and infidels. The first 
 had already an infallible guide in which they trusted, and as 
 for the infidels, they ridiculed the idea of any guide at all. 
 Both classes were utterly devoid of that acquaintance with 
 Scripture of which the Mormon Missionaries understood so 
 well how to take advantage, and which rendered them so sus- 
 ceptible to religious influences which took the Bible as their 
 basis. The Missionaries in Italy soon experienced the diffi- 
 culties presented by these facts. 
 
 After their arrival in Genoa, Mr. Stenhouse was directed to 
 carry the gospel to the Waldenses — those brave old Protestants 
 of the dark ages, who so manfully suffered, even unto death, for 
 conscience sake ; and some time after he had begun his labors 
 among them, the Apostle Snow joined him. 
 
 Whatever they might believe or teach theoretically, there 
 can be no doubt that the American Apostles were largely en- 
 dowed with the "organ" of caution, teaching without purse 
 or scrip among people who either detest you as a heretic or 
 else regard you with profound indifference is not a pleasant 
 task, and the Mormon Apostles very p-udently "took up" lib- 
 eral collections in England before they started. Had it not 
 been for this common-sense proceeding I am at a loss to say 
 what would have become of the Missionaries in Italy ; and as 
 It was, their lot was not a very enviable one. 
 
I08 WANTED — "the GIFT OF TONGUES." 
 
 Besides the scarcity of money, the other great difficulty ex- 
 perienced by the Missionaries was learning the language of 
 their destined converts. For many years, it was supposed 
 among the Saints that the " Gift of Tongues" would be all-suffi- 
 cient for this purpose. The two distinguished Apostles, Orson 
 and Parley P. Pratt, whose writings did so much for Mormon- 
 ism, had both of them eloquently discussed the subject in print; 
 but the Missionaries soon discovered that for practical pur- 
 poses the " gift" was not of much service ; and the two Pratts 
 themselves afterwards experienced — the one in South America 
 and the other in Austria — the fallacy of their theories. With- 
 out the "gift" in any shape the work in Italy was necessarily 
 very slow, and an Elder who could speak a little French was 
 sent out from London to assist them. They had at last come 
 to the conclusion that if the Lord would not bestow the "gift" 
 upon them, they must try to acquire it themselves. 
 
 The Apostle Snow now thought of sending the Gospel to 
 the Swiss, and Mr. Stenhouse was selected for the work. But 
 before he went it was determined that the Church in Italy 
 should be " organised," and about a week later, I received a 
 long account of how this was done. I heard how, one pleas- 
 ant November morning, the Apostle Snow, Elders Stenhouse 
 and Woodward, together with several Waldenses whom they 
 had converted, ascended the mountain-side contiguous to La 
 Tour, and overlooking the fertile valley of Pinerello. There 
 they sang praises and prayed: — they christened the place 
 " Mount Brigham ;" and the stone upon which the three elders 
 stood and offered. up a written prayer, they named "The Rock 
 of Prophecy" ; and there they organised the church — dedicating 
 the soil of Italy to the Lord. Moreover, then and there, 
 my husband was solemnly consecrated a " High-Priest, after 
 the Order of the Son of God." 
 
 All this I heard, and much more; and in confiding faith that 
 this was indeed a great and glorious work, I rejoiced that I 
 had been accounted worthy to suffer patiently at home, if only 
 my husband might successfully fulfil his task abroad. 
 
 After that I heard that he had left Italy and had arrived in 
 
LITTLE CLARA INTRODUCED TO THE WORLD, I09 
 
 Geneva, believing that he would be more successful among the 
 Swiss than the Italians. 
 
 A few days after the arrival of the Missionary in Geneva, 
 an event occurred which interested my own self personally — 
 my little Clara was born. Very happy was I when I looked 
 upon her tiny little face for the first time and kissed her for 
 being the prettiest baby in the world : very happy was I when 
 I folded her in my arms and talked to her as if she could un- 
 derstand all that I said — ^very happy indeed, as I looked at her 
 again and again, and marvelled whether she really could be 
 indeed and certainly my own baby girl. It seemed as if baby's 
 papa would never come back again, but I had a companion 
 now in my child ; and weak and weary as I was, with new re- 
 sponsibilities and less power to help myself, I found comfort 
 in my new care, and realised the truth of the old Scotch song : 
 
 "Muckle lichter is the load, 
 
 When Juve bears up the creel." 
 
 I was not now alone. 
 
 Then, too, came round to see me, Mary Burton. She was 
 as fond and tender to me as ever, and tripped quietly about 
 the room, and tried to wait upon me, and sat by the bed, play- 
 ing with baby, calling her all the pretty things she could 
 think of, and I felt that her presence brought new light and 
 life to my room. She brought me another letter from my hus- 
 band, and I found that he was now acquiring for himself the 
 " gift" of the French tongue, unable to do much else, as he and 
 everybody didn't understand each other. He could not yet 
 talk to the French-speaking Genevese ; and the English-speak- 
 ing residents would not listen to him ; they had only heard of 
 Mormonism as a clumsy fraud, and looked upon the prophet 
 Joseph Smith as an impostor. So, for a whole winter, he sat 
 shut up in his own room poring over a French grammar, and 
 deploring his hard fate in being denied the gift of tongues. 
 
 In the spring of the new year I received a distinguished 
 visitor who kindly interested himself in my welfare. The 
 Apostle Lorenzo Snow left Piedmont for England and passed 
 through Geneva en route. On his way to London he called 
 
I lo HE-UNITED. 
 
 upon me at Southampton, and expressed much sympathy for 
 me : — he noticed the change in my appearance, and immediately 
 sent for Mr. Stenhouse to return to England. He acted very 
 kindly by me at that time ; did all that he could to assist me, 
 and said that he never again would ask any man to make such 
 a sacrifice. I fully appreciated all his kindness ; but much as I 
 wanted to, I did not venture to ask him about the truth or 
 falsity of those terrible suggestions which I had heard whis- 
 pered of late. 
 
 My husband hastened home, coming by way of Calais, in 
 order to meet his president and receive his instructions. The 
 Apostle showed much sympathy for him, and very early in the 
 morning accompanied him some miles to the railway station ; 
 but he never once mentioned how I had been situated in 
 Southampton until he left him, and then he exacted from him 
 a promise not to open his lips whatever he might learn. 
 
 I need not say that I was happy to see my husband once 
 again, and to present to him his little daughter who was now 
 five months old. He was, of course, soon busy in visiting the 
 Saints, and he received from them many tokens of attachment. 
 
 In the beginning of June a General Conference of the 
 branches of the Church in Britain was held in London. The 
 Apostles and foreign Missionaries were present, and my hus- 
 band and I were also there. We had speeches and prayers. 
 The business of the Conference occupied but very few minutes, 
 for no measure was questioned. Among the Mormons there, 
 are no opinions, no discussion. The presiding head has made 
 out his programme before he comes to the conference ; he 
 knows what he wants to do, and no one ever questions him. 
 He may perhaps for form's sake invite the brethren to speak 
 on any point he introduces ; but when he has furnished the 
 clew to his wishes, the Elders who speak only spend their time 
 in arguments in favor of his measures. At the Conference of 
 which I speak the reports of the native eiders were very cheer- 
 ing to us. Throughout England and Wales they had been 
 most successful in adding members to the Church. Mormon- 
 ism was then most successfully preached in Britain. There 
 
HOW they kept the secret. Ill 
 
 were more Mormons there than in all Utah Territory : there 
 were fifty Conferences, with over seven hundred organised 
 "Branches," and more than six thousand men ordained to 
 the priesthood. That peculiar influence which th€ Mormons 
 call " the Spirit," of which I have spoken, elsewhere, was 
 spoken of by the Elders as being a common experience every- 
 where. 
 
 During all that Conference, I listened carefully for a word 
 from the lips of any of the speakers which might indicate in 
 any way that Polygamy was part of the Mormon faith; but 
 not a whisper, not a hint was uttered. I naturally concluded 
 that the Elders, whose doubtful expressions at Southampton 
 had so troubled my mind, were misinformed or unsafe men. 
 Still I could not altogether banish my apprehension of coming 
 evil ; but so bound to secresy were those who did know of 
 Polygamy being practiced in Utah, that there was not one 
 who would admit it, and even my own husband's lips were 
 sealed to me. He did not deny it, but he would not talk 
 about it, and did everything he could to banish the thought 
 from my mind. 
 
 At that Conference .the Apostle Snow spoke very strongly 
 of the way in which I had been neglected ; and it was 
 arranged that Elder Stenhouse should return t6 Switzerland, 
 and that I should aecompany him. My knowledge of French 
 was expected to be very serviceable. 
 
 We now made preparations for an early departure, and pre- 
 pared to leave our friends. To the reader it may seem strange 
 .for a man, his wife, and babe, to be sent out in this way on a 
 mission without any proper arrangement for their mainten- 
 ance, but to my mind, at the time, it seemed to me not only 
 perfectly proper, but altogether in accordance with God's word 
 and commandment. 
 
 My young friend, Mary Burton, came round to bid me good- 
 bye ; and the poor girl wept, and I wept with her, and we 
 kissed one another tenderly as our tears mingled. We had 
 become very dear to each other, and the thought of separa- 
 .Jion for years, or jperhaps for ever, was very painful to us. 
 
tI2 "WE THREE SET FORTH.' 
 
 She hung about my neck at the last moment, kissing me and 
 begging me not to forget to write to her very, very often, and 
 this I gladly promised her, asking the same in return. Then 
 with a fond embrace we parted, and it was years before I saw 
 her dear face again. 
 
 Thus it was that we three — my husband, my babe, and 
 myself — set forth on our pilgrimage to convert the Swiss. 
 
 It was with no ordinary feelings that I entered the ancient 
 city of Geneva. I was not ignorant of its history and the 
 struggles of its inhabitants for civil and religious liberty. It 
 had been the refuge for the English Protestants during the 
 fiery days of Queen Mary, just as in the time of the French 
 Revolutipn it was the refuge of infidel and Papist, royalist 
 and republican alike ; — there Calvin lived in gloomy auster-' 
 ity, battling with Rome ; there Servitus, the Unitarian, was - 
 condemned to be roasted alive as a heretic ; and there we 
 expected in our own humble way to be able to testify, by our 
 suffering and patience, to what we firmly believed was the 
 truth. 
 
 In free countries like England and the United States — free 
 from the surveillance of a military police, it is easy, if he 
 wishes it, for the Missionary to mount a chair at a street cor- 
 ner, or hold forth under a tree, and such has often been done. 
 But all over continental Europe there is hardly a place where 
 this would be possible. In the various grand duchies, king- 
 doms, and empires, paternal governments look too closely 
 after the morals and religion of their subjects ; while under 
 the ephemeral republics, as long as they happen to last, there 
 is often to be found, under the name of liberty, a despotism 
 more despotic than under the rule of royalty. It is the col- 
 porteur, the man of books and tracts, who makes the converts 
 there, and in this slow way we soon found that we were des- 
 tined to proceed. 
 
 During my husband's former stay in Geneva he had had 
 neither Mormon books nor Mormon papers, with the exception 
 of a paper published at Boulogne, containing a letter by the' 
 apostle Taylor, in French and English. This single copy he 
 
HOW THE TAILOR WAS ORDAINED A PRIEST. IlS 
 
 lent to a Genevese to read, and never saw it again ; and yet 
 in a short time, even before he could properly speak French, 
 he converted and baptized two men in the Rhone, one of 
 whom is to-day a devoted Mormon in Southern Utah. 
 
 His first attack was upon a shoemaker whom he visited for 
 the purpose of repairs. While the shoemaker worked. Elder 
 Stenhouse talked ; and as the English are all reputed wealthy 
 on the Continent, the friendly overtures of the Mormon Mis- 
 sionary were graciously received. As they grew intimate. 
 Elder Stenhouse would sit down on the bench beside the man 
 as he worked, and taking from his pocket a French Testa- 
 ment, which he always carried about with him, would try to 
 read it aloud — the good-natured shoemaker undertaking to cor- 
 rect his pronunciation. In this way he kept his auditor's 
 attention constantly fixed upon certain passages, more espe- 
 cially those which spoke of baptism for the remission of sins, 
 and the laying on of hands for the gift of the Holy Ghost. 
 So persistent was he that at last the shoemaker's curiosity 
 was awakened, and iinally he was baptized ; but unfortunately, 
 not long after, a small pamphlet upon the mission of Joseph 
 Smith fell into his hands and made shipwreck of his faith. 
 
 With his second convert he was much more successful; 
 This time it was his landlord who was to be the subject of 
 attack. , He was a tailor, and, fortunately for the Missionary, 
 somewhat talkative. The same arrangement was made about 
 reading and correction, and with a like result— the tailor was 
 baptized. Just at this time came the Apostle Show's letter 
 telling my husband to return to England ; and as he might 
 not leave the country without a representative, he ordained 
 the tailor a Priest in the Mormon Church. 
 
 When we arrived in Geneva, Monsieur le tailleur was all 
 that constituted the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day 
 Saints in Switzerland. 
 
 Soon a few personal friends began to gather to hear the 
 English Missionary tell about the new religion, and my hus- 
 band being very much in earnest, interest before long began 
 to be excited. I remember well our first meetings among the 
 
Il6 MY OWN MISSIONARY WORK. 
 
 Swiss : — half-a-dozen people sitting round a table with opea 
 Bibles before them, passages from which Mr. Stenhouse was 
 trying in very. bad French to make them understand, I pitied 
 him very much, but those who were present made as if they 
 did not notice his embarrassment, and listened with marked 
 attention. Among the Mormons it is a woman's duty to keep 
 silence; I therefore remained a listener only. But at the 
 close of the service — for such it was regarded — when I might 
 speak, my missionary labors began, I was aroused to el6- 
 ijuence, and our parting was longer than our meeting. 
 
 The warmth with which the few who were presfent responded 
 to our efforts satisfied me that they had come under the same 
 mysterious influence which I had observed in England., I 
 was then convinced that Mormonism could awaken the Chris- 
 tian soul more to a realisation of what it already possessed; 
 than impart to it any new moral or reUgious qualities. Mor-r 
 monism of itself never made Christians, but Christianity 
 built up Mormonism. It was an awakening to the teachings 
 of Christ and his Apostles that begat confidence in the mis- 
 sion of the Mormon Prophet. 
 
 Although we observed the very strictest economy, it did 
 not take long for us to exhaust what little money we brought 
 from England. This placed us in a very awkward position. 
 It is inconvenient enough to be without money in one's own 
 country, where one understands and is understood by every- 
 body ; but to be in a strange land, especially in a country like 
 Switzerland, where every Englishman is supposed to be a 
 "milor" and the bounteous dispenser of Unlimited wealth, it is 
 more than inconvenient. 
 
 We left our first quarters, where we had had so many visitors, 
 and rented a room from a widow woman. Who fortunately was 
 not inquisitive. . She had a family of children to support, and 
 as we paid our rent monthly in advance, she had no occasion 
 to know whether or not we kept a bank account, and we were 
 thankful that it»was so, for, had it been so ordained, we could 
 there have starved to death without attracting the notice of 
 any one. — A nice thing to be thankful for. 
 
"AS ^LACK AS THE DEVIL." IIJT 
 
 We were not hopeless, though we were heavy-hearted ; but 
 we had expected trial, and could not complain, for we knew 
 from the beginning that thus it would probably be. 
 
 One day my husband received a letter from an infidel gen- 
 tleman who lived in Lausanne — a neighboring canton — re- 
 questing him to come and see him, that they might talk 
 together over Mormonism, for he had heard of us and of our 
 doctrine, and my husband resolved to visit him before our 
 money was all gone. 
 
 When Mr. Stenhouse reached Lausanne, he visited first a 
 Protestant minister with whom he had some slight acquaint- 
 ance, and who was also interested in Mormonism, and told 
 him that he was going to call upon the Governeur de 
 I'Hopital. The minister was greatly opposed to my husband 
 visiting such a man. " He is a socialist," he said — " a revolu- 
 tionist ; he fought at the barricades ; he is a mauvais sujet, 
 and anything but a fit person to be spoken to about re- 
 ligion." 
 
 This only increased the interest which Mr. Stenhouse felt 
 in the Governor, and made him more than ever determined to 
 see him ; and he did see him, although the good minister had 
 represented him "aussi noir que le diable" So they met ; and 
 my husband began the work for which he had come. They 
 had long talks together, and my husband — as did the Elders 
 ever in such cases — spoke to the Governor of redemption 
 through Christ, and baptism for the remission of sins. Faith 
 is not an act of the will. Like the unseen wind, it comes, and 
 we see the power thereof, but know not whence it proceeds. 
 Thus at first the unbelieving Governor found it — he might 
 find himself no match for the arguments of his opponent, but 
 he could not force his heart to believe, and he was by no 
 means a willing convert. My husband, hqwever, remained 
 with him, and before he left, the Governor had been baptized 
 into the Church. 
 
 Our new convert proved to be a most excellent and worthy 
 man, notwithstanding his- former infidelity, and he was subse- 
 quently a great aid to us in our mission. We felt satisfied 
 8 
 
ilH "THE LORD WILL PROVIDE. 
 
 that the expenses of that journey had been well spent, 
 although a few francs at that time could ill be spared. 
 
 But our circumstances seemed to be getting worse and 
 worse, and my health began to fail. For several • months 
 neither of us had had sufificient nourishment, and my anxieties 
 increased my physical weakness ; I was dispirited, yet I feared 
 to complain, or even to let my husband know what I felt. At 
 length I was really ill, and could not leave my bed. I well 
 remember the solemn silence that reigned in our home one 
 day. I had risen from my bed, weak, and Oh, so faint- 
 hearted, that I had scarcely any desire to live; and I was 
 sitting with my little daughter in my arms. She had cried 
 herself to sleep, cold and hungry, and much as I loved her — 
 nay, idolised her — I confess that for an instant, I harbored in 
 my soul the impious, the unnatural wish, that rather than see 
 my darling awake again .to cold and hunger, she might sleep 
 her sweet young life away. For me to yield to such a 
 thought — to wish my child to wake no more — I, who would 
 have given gladly the last drop of my life-blood to save her — 
 for me to look upon her innocent little face with such a 
 thought ! I can hardly now believe that such a thing was 
 possible, even for a moment. But I was desperate, and bold, 
 and cowardly — all at the same time — or my heart was humil- 
 iated by poverty, and my faith was rousing bitter thoughts' 
 in my mind. > 
 
 My husband was pacing the room ; I knew too well all that 
 was passing in his mind, although we had long been silent. 
 At length I said to him : " Take courage, dear, for we are the 
 servants of the great God, and surely He will find a means of 
 escape for us. We were sent here; we came because the 
 Lord wanted us to come, and surely He will provide for us ! " 
 
 He turned to me in reply, and said kindly, " We can at 
 least have some water," and he went for some water, and then 
 with as reverential feeling in his soul as ever inspired a grace 
 before dinner, he blessed it, and we drank. 
 
 We had scarcely done so when the mail-courier brought a 
 letter to our door. 
 
THE TRIAL OF OUR FAITH. Hg 
 
 Governor Stoudeman, with a feeling of delicacy, had hesi- 
 tated, when my husband visited him at Lausanne, to offer him 
 any assistance ; but, he said in his letter, he had been " im- 
 pressed " to do so, and hoped that we should not be offended. 
 As the letter was opened, a piece of gold fell upon the table. 
 We could hardly believe that God had so soon answered our 
 prayers and sent us relief, and our emotions of gratitude for 
 this timely aid, found expression in tears. 
 
 All this time our landlady knew nothing of our distress ; 
 she was as ignorant gf our situation as if she had never seen 
 us. So long as I was able to walk about, I used at regular 
 hours to go to the kitchen, get the cooking utensils, and go 
 through the routine of cooking as if we had had a well-filled 
 larder all the time. I set the table with punctilious care, and 
 the good old widow never suspected but that we had plenty. 
 Thus supposing that we wanted nothing, she and her children 
 were more than ordinarily kind to us and to our little girl, 
 who was now old enough to toddle round and go from room to 
 room. Very often they would get her into their room at 
 meal-time and give her little things to please her ; and while 
 they felt honored in being permitted to do so, we were 
 silently thankful for our child's sake, for her, sufferings 
 were more than we could endure. 
 
 The temporary aid from Lausanne was very welcome to us, 
 though it only served to make us feel more keenly our 
 dependent position. I might relate stories — alas, too true — of 
 cold and want ; of days, and even almost an entire week passed 
 at one time without food — stories which for painful detail 
 would eclipse romance. It was a weary waiting for Provi- 
 dence ! Such things are better forgotten. And yet I feel 
 that in after years my temper was more subdued and my 
 mind more patient under affliction than it would have been 
 had I not experienced this preparatory discipline. 
 
 People who have heard, with a sneer, of MormOn Mission- 
 aries and their work, would perhaps have realised that faith 
 may be sincere, although mistaken, if they could have seen us 
 at that time. The first teachers of a doctrine, whether it be 
 
I20 - WAITING FOR PROVIDENCE. 
 
 good or evil, if only it stems the current opinions of the hour, 
 have ever found that at the end of a rocky way there was 
 waiting for them a crown of thorns. 
 
 Many a time since then I have felt the weight of anxious 
 care in providing for my family — the trial of our faith has not 
 been light or seldom repeated ; but those days of trouble in 
 Switzerland were, I think, the darkest that I ever experienced 
 We realised literally the necessity of trusting to God's daily 
 mercies for our daily bread ; and the assurance that the Lord 
 wovild provide was our only hope. To say that we practiced 
 the strictest economy would be to give but a faint idea of the 
 way in which we had to consider and contrive in order to 
 exist at all. For years we kept " The Word of Wisdom " — ■ 
 a " Revelation of Joseph Smith," which enjoined abstinence 
 from wine, coffee, tea, or, in fact, warm drinks of any kind ; 
 and trifling as such self-denial may at first appear, it was not 
 really so when other privations were added thereto. For 
 months at a time we existed, — for I dare not say lived,— 
 without what are considered, even by the poorest, the most 
 common necessaries. I can even recall to mind one trying 
 week in Switzerland, when, for the whole seven long days, we 
 had less than a pint of corn-flour to live upon, and that was 
 chiefly reserved for our poor child. 
 
 As I look back to those dark, painful times I feel that it 
 was by little short of a miracle that our lives were spared?— 
 our faith alone saved us. 
 
CHAPTER VIII. 
 
 OUR MISSION IN SWITZERLAND :— MTTTTERINGS OF THE 
 COMING STORM. 
 
 An Apostle Comes to rielp Me — How the Wives of Missionaries were Sup- 
 ported — I Meet with Friends— My Attempts at Proselytizing — Madame Ealif 
 Rejects the Revelation — Primitive Meetings of the Saints— Certain Bashful 
 Men— A Lady Weak in the Faith— How My Faith was Tried—" If You 
 Could Get that Child Healed "—Wanted : The Gift of Healing— What 
 Governor Stoudeman Did— The Fate of a Little Child— Madame Balif Makes 
 a Suggestion^ — An Effort of Faith — My Doubts and Fears — An Anxious 
 Night — Mary Burton's Letter — Elder Shrewsbury Manifests Himself — A 
 Girl's Opinion of Her Lover — Fears of Polygamy — Certain Imprudent Elders 
 — The American Brethren — Learning a Business — ^Jealous of Her Husband — 
 " My Elder " — An Unsettled Mind — Obtaining Information — Nothing Deter- 
 mined. , 
 
 VERY soon after this we were notified that the Apostle 
 Snow was on his way to Switzerland, and that we might 
 shortly expect him. 
 
 This to me was joyful news, for he had relieved me of my 
 trouble once before, and I almost looked upon him as my 
 good angel. He came, and remained with us a few days, and 
 before he left he instructed Mr. Stenhouse to repair to Eng- 
 land to raise funds to aid the mission. He also gave me a 
 few pounds to procure what I needed for an event which I 
 expected shortly to , take "place. This kindness on his part 
 brought to my mind such a sense of relief, and renewed my 
 energy, so that I felt ready for my missionary labors again. 
 
 When my second child was about two months old, I went 
 to Lausanne, to reside, while my husband was absent in 
 England. Apartments were engaged for me at the house of 
 a gentleman who had recently been baptized. I was made 
 
122 HOW I LIVED ON A DOLLAR A WEEK. 
 
 very comfortable there, and for the first time since my hus- 
 band was sent on a mission, I experienced a feehng of repose, 
 so that I now had some hopes of regaining mental and 
 physical strength. No provision had been made by the Saints 
 for my support; but even without that, I thought, living 
 among those who were themselves happy, and one with us in 
 the faith, I should myself find more tranquillity of mind. 
 
 Madame and Monsieur Balif, in whose house I resided, were 
 persons of good social position. The husband was one of 
 nature's gentlemen, and as good a man as I ever knew. He 
 received the Mormonism taught by Mr. Stenhouse with all 
 his heart, and never seemed weary of showing his gratitude 
 by his good deeds. Madame Balif did not at once join the 
 Church, and probably never would have done so but for the 
 love which she bore to her husband ; she was not however 
 hostile to the new faith, as some other wives were, and she 
 did all that she could to render pleasant my stay with them, 
 and tried to make me forget what I had suffered in Geneva. 
 
 Madame Balif was a high-spirited, impulsive woman, and 
 devotedly attached to her husband ; I never saw a woman 
 more so. She impressed me as being one of the happiest of 
 wives ; he one of the best of husbands. After I had lived in 
 the house a few weeks, she was baptized ; but she never was 
 satisfied with Mormonism. Poor, dear lady ! How often 
 have I bitterly regretted that I was instrumental in leading 
 her into the Mormon Church, in which, as years later, in 
 Utah, she told me, she endured such cruel humiliation and 
 martyrdom. I knew well indeed then what all that meant. 
 
 While I lived with them, it was agreed that I should pay 
 for my apartments monthly ; but after I had paid for the first 
 month, Monsieur Balif told me that I should do so no more; 
 and knowing that he meant it as an expression of kindness 
 and gratitude on his part, I felt relieved of all anxiety on that 
 account. All that I had, even then, for the support of myself 
 and my two little ones was about five francs (;^i) a week, but 
 my wants were few,- for I had taught myself to require no«Jiing 
 but what was absolutely necessary to keep me alive. 
 
LITTLE CLARA BECOMES A TEST OF FAITH. 123 
 
 During Mr. Stenhouse's absence, the meetings were held in 
 my parlor, and as the brethren who had joined the Church 
 had not previously been religious men, though they were per- 
 sons of the best moral character, they were very diffident 
 about conducting the meetings, and for a time could not 
 think of praying before others. It devolved upon me — of 
 sheer necessity, for I disliked prominence as much as they 
 did — to lead the singing, to pray, to preach, in fact, to do 
 everything. Had I not done so, they would have sat looking 
 at each other, for they were all too timid to speak. I en- 
 couraged them in ev^ry way to try, and finally we got along 
 very well. A "good spirit" prevailed, and we were like a 
 little band of brothers and sisters. 
 
 The only person, now, who gave me any anxiety was 
 Madarpe Balif, who was very weak in the faith. Her doubts 
 and fears troubled me much, for I had conceived a very great 
 regard for her. I feared that with a heart so proud and rebel- 
 lious as hers, she would never get salvation, and I trembled 
 for her happiness. How slight a hold the new faith had taken 
 of her mind I was forcibly reminded by an incident which 
 was at the time a great trial to me. 
 
 My little daughter fell sick of intermittent fever, and I 
 dared not call in a physician ; it would not do for me — a mis- 
 sionary's wife, to show lack of faith. Such was our zeal in 
 those days ; but now, as I once before stated, even the most 
 orthodox Mormons, including Brigham Young, do not think 
 of relying upon God and the ordinances of the Church, as 
 they used to in former years, but call in the best physician 
 they can get. 
 
 I was much troubled about my little girl, for she was evi- 
 dently failing fast. She had been " administered to " by one 
 the native Elders who had anointed her with oil and prayed 
 over her, but yet she did not get better. Madame Balif, in 
 the midst of my affliction taunted me about the child not re- 
 covering, and asked where was the power of God, of which 1 
 had talked so much : " Now," said she, " if you could get that 
 child healed, it would be some proof, to my mind, that the 
 
124 . "WE KNELT AND PRAYED." 
 
 power you speak of is still in the Church." I felt ashamed 
 that I had not exercised more faith ; I was certain that the 
 gift of healing was in the Church, and I believed it was my 
 own fault that the child was not even now well. In my zeal 
 I repUed rather warmly : " My child will be healed, and you 
 shall see it." But I had no sooner "uttered these words than 
 I began to fear I had promised too much. 
 
 I determined, however, that nothing on my part should be 
 left undone. I sent for Governor Stoudeman — our new con- 
 vert — as he was the President of the branch and an Elder. I 
 told him that this child mtist be healed by the power of God, 
 We had not witnessed any manifestation of the healing power 
 among the Saints in Switzerland, up to that time, and I ear- 
 nestly desired that now for the first time this gift might be 
 proved among us, for the sake of the Church as well as for my 
 own. So I told the Governor that it was his duty, as well as 
 mine, to fast and pray that the Lord might grant us this bless- 
 ing, that it might be a testimony that it was His work and that 
 we were His servants. 
 
 He became as enthusiastic as I was myself, and we fasted 
 and prayed for nearly two days. At the end of that time he 
 came to see me, and by the bedside we knelt and prayed, and 
 he laid his hands upon the child and blessed her in the name 
 of the Lord. 
 
 That night the child was very low, and though I strove to 
 show my faith, I dreaded that she would have her usual at- 
 tack of fever about midnight. After the departure of the 
 elder, Madame Balif came into the rooin and said : " Your 
 child is very ill ; if your God cannot help her, why do not you 
 send for a physician T This appeared to me so" profane and 
 such an insult to my God and my faith, that I replied indigo 
 nantly : " Madame ; she will and shall be healed this very 
 night ; for I know that power is in the Church. The reason 
 why the child was not healed before is because I have not 
 ^'been earnest enough in seeking the Lord." 
 
 When I was left alone I sat down by the bedside, trembling., 
 lest -I had been too rash in declaring that the child would be 
 
MIDNIGHT PRAYER. 125 
 
 healed that same night. Much and fondly as I loved my little 
 treasure, I confess that I suffered more at the thought of 
 Gk)d's name suffering reproach than I did from fear of my 
 darling's death ; and I tried earnestly to banish my doubts 
 with the remembrance that all things are possible to them 
 that believe. 
 
 Kneeling there in the dark and lonesome midnight, X 
 poured out my soul fervently to God, beseeching Him for His 
 kingdom's sake and for the glory of His great name to answer, 
 and not to suffer my unworthiness to stand in the way. I 
 watched hour after hour beside my darling's bed, and the 
 child slept on peacefully, without any symptoms of return- 
 ing fever ; and. Oh, how anxiously I waited for her awaking. 
 
 At last, worn out with fatigue and watching, I laid myself 
 down on the bed beside her, and soon fell asleep ; and when I 
 awoke it was daylight, and my little one was peacefully sleep- 
 ing on still — the fever had left her. No tongue could tell the 
 gratitude which filled my heart ; I could only weep tears of 
 joy and sing aloud my praise to God. 
 
 Madame Bailif entered the room early in the morning, to 
 see what kind of a night we had passed. Then I drew her to 
 the bedside, and told her how tranquilly the child had slept 
 all night, and showed her how much better she looked, and 
 asked her if she did not see in all this the providence of God. 
 But she simply said : " Ah, well ! I suppose the disease had 
 run its course." This grieved me, for I had trusted that such 
 a direct answer to my prayers would have helped to increase 
 her faith in our religion, but Mormonism had not touched her 
 heart, and I believe it is much more the devotion of the heart 
 than it is the mental acquiescence in doctrine which gives us 
 the power to hope, and endure and believe. 
 
 When, by-and-by, my little Clara awoke, she was evidently 
 very much better, and not only free from the fever, but 
 bright and cheerful, like her former self, and she never re- 
 lapsed. In the course of a week she was running about as 
 well as ever, and the Saints were greatly confirmed in their 
 faith. 
 
J 26 A LETTER FROM MARY BURTON. 
 
 One morning not long after this, Madame Balif brought me 
 a' letter which, as it bore the English post-mark, she supposed 
 came from my husband. The writing, however, was strange 
 to me; and dreading that some terrible thing might have hap- 
 pened, I tore it open. There, at the bottom of the last page-^ 
 for the letter was very long — in neat, clear characters, was the 
 signature of my fairy friend, as I called her, Mary Burton. I 
 read the letter through with the deepest interest. It was 
 addressed "to darling Sister Stenhouse," and was overflow- 
 ing with affection. Used as I was to all her endearing 
 ways, I could almost fancy that while I read I heard her 
 speaking the words. After a great outpouring of love, she 
 said : — 
 
 Since you left Southampton, we have had many 
 
 changes. We remained there until nearly all our old friends had left us and 
 emigrated to Zion ; and although my father could not possibly go at that time, 
 and I was much too young to travel alone, the President actually scolded me for 
 not being willing to emigrate with the others. When I told him that I was 
 too young to act for myself he said a good deal about Elder Shrewsbury. I do 
 not know whether you will remember Elder Shrewsbury but I will try to bring him 
 to your mind. Do you not rememfcer a gentleman who came several times to the 
 meeting with me, and who was at the pic-nic just before you left England ? He 
 was very young, with dark hair and beautiful dark eyes to match. He came 
 with Papa first to the meeting, and then he contrived to make friends with me, 
 and I used to see him very often, and he paid me much attention. 
 
 I suppose I ought to tell you all that I think about him, and how we have 
 had such pleasant times together, — and so I would, too, if you were here so that 
 I might be kissed first, as you used to do ; but it seems so formal to write such 
 things on paper ;■ I'm afraid almost that he might see. No ! I never told him 
 yet that I cared for him a bit, and I am not sure myself whether I do. I think 
 he's very nice, but I know he's a good Mormon, and if I thought there was any 
 truth in those things which we used to talk about, I'd die before I'd marry him, 
 or go to Salt Lake either. 
 
 I remember you talked to him on the day of the pic-nic, and I thought you 
 seemed to like him; in fact you could not help doing so, for he is so clever 
 and so intellectual. That was a happy time we had then ; the brethren and sis- 
 ters all seemed to have cast dull care to the winds, and to have given themselves 
 up to full and free enjoyment, with the exception of one solitary pair of married 
 lovers — you know who I mean — but now you are again united, 1 suppose, and, 
 of course happy. 
 
 I told the President that I had not the " spirit of gathering," and that if my 
 father agreed, I would perhaps go next season; but, entre nous, I did not tell 
 him that I had another reason besides. What would you think, dear, if I were 
 to go out as a bride ? But I am very naughty I suppose to think of such a thing. 
 
HOW THE MARRIED ELDERS "MADE LOVE." I27 
 
 Since you went, I have grown quite an old woman. You used to call me 
 " little fairy," but. Sister Stenhouse, I am much bigger now. I am now a good 
 deal over fifteen, and people say that I am getting to be quite a woman. I 
 might tell you some other pretty things that are said about me, but I'm afraid 
 you'd say it was all vanity of vanities. If you stay away much longer you won't 
 recognise me when we meet again. 
 
 And now I want to tell you something that interests you as much as me. I 
 have not been able to discover anything more with certainty about those hateful 
 things of which I told you, although the word Polygamy seems to me to become 
 every day much more familiar in people's conversation. Elder Shrewsbury tells 
 me that there is not a word of truth in it, and he has had a good deal of conversa- 
 tion upon that subject with the apostles who are here, and also with a man named 
 Curtis E. Bolton— an Elder from the Salt Lake ; and they all positively declare 
 that it is a foul slander up«n the Saints of the Most High. So you see that all 
 our unhappiness was for nought. Our Saviour said we should be blessed when 
 all men spoke evil of us falsely for His name's sake ; and the wicked scandal 
 which has been raised against our religion has had a tendency to strengthen 
 my faith, which you know was rather wavering. 
 
 And yet do you know. Sister Stenhouse, that even while I am writing to you 
 in this strain, I am weak enough to allow doubts and fears to creep into my heart 
 when I think of the conduct of some of the American brethren. 
 
 They appear to me, for married men, to act so very imprudently ; and to call 
 their conduct ' imprudent ' is really treating it with the greatest leniency, for I 
 have often been quite shocked at the way in which some of the brethren and 
 sisters acted. But I will tell you a little about it, and you shall judge for yourself. 
 
 When I found out, as I had long suspected, that dear Papa was going to 
 marry again, I at once resolved that I would no longer be a burden to him, but 
 would find some employment and support myself. I was induced to do this 
 partly because, as you know, step-mothers and daughters do not always love each 
 other quite "as much as they might. Sol communicated my wishes to Papa, and 
 told him that I had been introduced to a very nice lady, who has a large dress- 
 making establishment at the west end of London ; she is a member of the 
 Church, and has always been very highly spoken of. I told him that she em- 
 ployed a number of highly respectable young girls, and that four, at least, of 
 them were members of the Church, and that in consideration of my lonely 
 situation, and at the earnest request of Elder Shrewsbury, she was willing to 
 take me into her house to board and lodge me, and teach me the business 
 thoroughly, if my father would pay her a premium of fifty pounds. 
 
 This Papa readily agreed to do, as I expected he would, for he is so taken up 
 with my step-mama — that is to be — and besides which he has, I know, been un- 
 fortunate lately in some railway speculations, and has lost a great deal of 
 money, and therefore wishes to economise. In this way I went to London, 
 and became ^ member of Mrs. ElsWorth's family — and here I am still. 
 
 Now you have been in London, Sister Stenhouse, and must remember " the 
 office " in Jewin Street — the head-quarters where all the elders congregate, and 
 where the American elders board, and Church-business is managed. Well, 
 the very first week I was at Mrs. Elsworth's I noticed that the four young 
 sisters who were working there were constantly talking of Jewin Street and the 
 
128 A WOMAN WHO WAS ALWAYS SAD. 
 
 dear American brethren who were stopping there. One of them in particular 
 was always talking about dear Elder Snow; and another girl whispered to me 
 that she went to Jewin Street every evening, and frequently remained there to 
 tea with him, and went afterwards to the theatre with him, or to a meeting, as 
 the case might be; and, the young lady added, " She does make such a fuss 
 over him, toying with him and brushing and combing his hair. I know that 
 she does it, for I have been there with her, and have seen her do it; and he 
 appears to enjoy it quite as much as she does, and, I believe, if Polygamy 
 was true he would marry her." 
 
 " But," I said, " it is not true, and therefore it is very wrong for her to act in 
 that way, for he is a married man. '' 
 
 " Oh, but you know," she answered, " that we are all brothers and sisters, 
 and the brethren tell us that those little attentions make them feel that they are 
 not so far from home, and they are thus enabled to perform their mission better; 
 and if that is so, it is the duty of the young sisters to encourage them. 
 These little attentions cost nothing, and I'm sure it's quite a pleasure to me." 
 
 " Then_j'o» go to Jewin Street .'" I asked. 
 
 " Yes," she said, " sometimes, but not very often, for my elder calls here fre- 
 quently, as he is acquainted with Mrs. Elsworth; and then I take my work up 
 into the parlor sometimes and have a long talk with him. Mrs. Elsworth does 
 not like it, I know, but she does not care to oppose the Elders; — ^in fact her hus- 
 band will not allow any such thing — he has dared her to do so. After all, 
 she is very silly, for we ought to love each other and be free and friendly. 
 My Elder — I call him my elder, you know, simply because I like him better than 
 the others — calls Mrs. Elsworth ' Gentilish,' and says she'll get over when she 
 goes to Zion. But she says she won't. She is awfully jealous of her husband 
 and a certain Miss Caroline somebody, though she doesn't care for him.'' 
 
 " But what difference can it make to him," I asked her ; " he has a wife and 
 ought not to pay attention to other women." 
 
 " Ah, you silly child," she said, " it is only brotherly love, after all, and men 
 often have wives who do not make them happy and that makes them seek the 
 society of the young sisters, for those who are far from home are lonely. My 
 own elder's wife is here in London, but he isn't much with her. He spends 
 nearly all his time in Jewin Street ; he is a travelling Elder, and when he is 
 going anywhere to preach he always calls for me, as he does not like going 
 alone, he is such a genial soul. If Polygamy were true I'd promise to marry him 
 when we reached the valley." 
 
 Then I asked why his wife didn't go with him, and she said: "Oh, poor man ! 
 he has no pleasure 'vdher society. She is always moping and unhappy ; you 
 know, some women are naturally so. I do all I can to make him feel well, for 
 it must be awful to be married to a woman who is always sad." 
 
 I asked her why his wife should be so unhappy, and she said : " He tells me 
 that' she has got it into her head that somehow or other Polygamy is practiced in 
 Zion ; and I'm sm-e I, for one, wish it was so, for then we could maiTy whoever 
 wre pleased." 
 
 " Oh, for shame !" I said, " I'm sure I'd never go there if I thought so." 
 
 Then I asked her whether she did not think it was wrong for her to encourage 
 the attentions of her elder ; and she said : " He wishes it just as much as I do, 
 
FAITH AND FLIRTATION. 1 29 
 
 and his wife had better behave herself, or I'll marry him whether Polygamy 
 exists or not in Zion ; and he does not know, though we both suspect, that there 
 is something in the rumors which we have heard." Then I told her I thought 
 it was very wicked to encourage the visits of that man, for I believe that if he 
 paid a little more attention to his wife she would be less unhappy — for I sup- 
 posed she knew of his attentions to her. 
 
 She said the wife knew nothing about it ; that he was obliged to be out late 
 at night, preaching, or at Jewin Street, which I knew meant flirting with the sis- 
 ters and going to the theatre, and I fancy he does more of that than preaching. 
 But she seemed to think it was all the wife's fault, and blamed her. I asked her 
 if she would like to be treated so, if she were an Elder's wife, and had to work 
 as hard and endure as much as all the Missionaries' wives do; but she said she 
 never could be in such a portion, and told me that I was not a good Mormon or 
 I would not set myself up as the accuser of the brethren. But I ask you, Sister 
 Stenhouse, if that is the Mormonism which the elders used to teach us ? 
 
 And now I have told you all our long talk together and so you can judge for 
 yourself what a cjiange has taken place since you left. 
 
 The same day, after dinner. Brother Snow called, in company with two other 
 elders, to see Mrs. Elsworth, and to ask her and the girls to o. tea-party, the 
 next day. Mrs. Elsworth declined; but one young lady would go with Brother 
 Snow, and Miss Caroline went with another Elder ; and my light-hearted 
 friend waited till Aey Elder came also to ask &er. After that, came Elder Shrews- 
 bury, and I, of course, was to go with him. 
 
 With all my faith, I am very much troubled about these things. They are not 
 right, I think. Why, scarcely a day passes but some of those Elders, who appear 
 to have very little to do, call here and send for one or two of these young sisters, 
 and detain them from their work, much to the annoyance of poor Mrs. Elsworth, 
 who I believe will apostatise over it eventually. 
 
 See what a long letter I have written to you ! I am afraid it will tire you. I 
 often long to have you here, that I might come to you and tell you all my 
 troubles. But perhaps, after all, I am wrong, and ought to see things in a differ- 
 ent light. Have not the Elders and Apostles positively denied that Polygamy 
 0r any other sin was practiced in Utah, or formed any part of the ' Mormon 
 religion; and we know that these men of God would not lie to us. 
 
 Be sure, dear, to write a nice long letter to me very soon; and with fondest 
 
 love remember your own 
 
 Mary Burton." 
 
 I read this letter carefully through, and I sat down and 
 thought of dear Mary Burton, and felt deeply sorry that she 
 should be placed in a situation surrounded by so many 
 temptations. To myself the letter brought a sad confirmation 
 of all my fears. There was something painful in the thought. 
 Had polygamy been openly avowed as a Mormon doctrine I 
 should never have joined the Church. But now, what could 
 Ido.^ 
 
130 CERTAIN UNBLUSHING FALSEHOODS. 
 
 After three months' absence, Mr. Stenhouse was to return- 
 home, and I went to Geneva to meet him, feeling very happy : 
 when I saw him once again. Numbers of persons, both in 
 Geneva and Lausanne had been converted while he was away 
 and were waiting for him to baptize them ; — among them was 
 a retired Protestant minister, Monsidur Petitpierre, of whotti 
 t have something yet to mention. We began at last to rejoice 
 n our success and to be, thankful that the Lord had answered- 
 5ur prayers. 
 
 I was now more than ever anxious about Polygamy. From 
 much thinking on that subject, it had become the haunting 
 spectre of my existence, and I dreaded what every day might 
 bring forth. The news which my husband brought with him 
 by no means reassured me. He told me that he had heard' 
 in England from the American Elders that there was a 
 general expectation among the Saints in Utah that at the 
 October Conference in Salt Lake City, Brigham Young' 
 would publish to the world that Polygamy was a doctrine of 
 the Mormon Church. 
 
 After all the prevarications and denials then of the Apostles 
 and Elders, Polygamy among the Saints was really a fact. As 
 the truth became clearer to my mind, I thought I should lose 
 my senses ;— the very foundations of my faith were shaken, 
 and not only did I feel a personal repugnance to the unholy 
 doctrine, but I began to realise that the men to whom I had, 
 listened with such profound respect and had regarded as the. 
 representatives of God, had been guilty of the most deliberate' 
 and unblushing falsehood, and I began to ask myself whether, 
 if they could do this in order to carry out their purpose in one 
 particular, might they not be guilty of deception upon other 
 points ? Who could I trust now ? For ten years the Mormo'n, 
 Prophets and Apostles had been living in Polygamy at home,, 
 while abroad they vehemently denied it and spoke of it as a 
 deadly sin. This was a painful awakening to me ; we had all 
 of us been betrayed ; I lost confidence in man, and even began 
 to question within myself whether I could even trust in God, 
 
 There was no argument between Mr. Stenhouse and myr 
 
ANXIOUS ABOUT POLYGAMY. I3I 
 
 self. It would have been worse than useless, for it was not 
 his doing, and he assured me that he had as great a repug- 
 nance to the doctrine as I had. He had at first only hinted 
 that it might eventually be acknowledged by the leaders of 
 the Church, but it was a matter of too deeply a personal 
 character for me to keep silence, and I did not rest until he 
 had told me all. He had not seen the revelation, but the 
 information which he had received was beyond a question ; 
 and singularly enough Elder Margetts, the London Elder, of 
 whose flirtation in Southampton I have already spoken, was at 
 that tirne on a visit to Switzerland, and confirmed all that my 
 husband had said. Thus the very man who, two years before, 
 first excited my suspicions, now confirmed my fears, and 
 openly stated as a fact, that which he then was ashamed 
 almost to suggest. 
 
 Elder Margetts had been in Utah from the time I saw him 
 in England, and was now on a mission to Italy. He knew, 
 therefore, very well what was said and done among the Saints 
 in Zion. I, and those like me, whose faith was not too strong, 
 were spoken of as ' babes ' to whom milk only must be given ; 
 and in this way any deception necessary to quiet our tender 
 consciences was allowable ; but Elder Margetts was one oi 
 the ' strong men ' to whom meat was necessary : — in other 
 words, they were initiated into all the mysteries of the faith. 
 
 My husband enjoined me not -to speak of what I had heard, 
 and I felt very little inclination to do so — my heart was too 
 full. The pleasant dreams and hopes of life were ended now 
 to me — what could I look forward to .' Henceforth the stern 
 realities of a lonely and weary existence were all the future 
 that should be mine. 
 
 Still, the "Revelation" sanctioning a change in the. doctrines 
 and practice of the Church, was not yet published ; and until 
 Polygamy was openly avowed I felt that the doom of my 
 happiness was not yet sealed, and like many another heart- 
 broken woman, I hoped against hope. 
 
CHAPTER IX. 
 
 THE REVELATION ON "CELESTIAL MARRIAGE." 
 
 Waiting for the Revelation — The Millennial Star — The Revelation on the Order 
 of " Celestial Marriage" — " My Servant Joseph " — The Keys of the Kingdom 
 — Marrying for Eternity — The Unpardonable Sin — Being "As the Angels" — '■ 
 Sealed by the Holy Spirit — Shedding Innocent Blood — The Example of 
 Abraham — The Power of the Priesthood — " Mine Handmaid, Emma Smith " 
 — "If He have Ten Virgins Given Unto Him" — Let This Suffice for the 
 Present — An Astonishing Message from Heaven — Learning to Bear the Cross 
 — Without Hope — Longing to Confide in Some One — My Indignant Recep- 
 tion of the "Revelation"— "I Dared Not even Kneel to God"— "There Was 
 " A Knock at My Chamber Door" — Not a Very Entertaining Party — "The 
 Old Gentleman Stood the Test" — Monsieur Petitpierre "Thinks Prayerfully" 
 Over the Matter. 
 
 AND time flew by ; and at length the dreaded Revelation 
 came. 
 
 One very pleasant morning, early in January, 1853, two 
 Elders of the Italian Mission, Jabez Woodward and Thomas 
 Margetts, took breakfast with us ; and with them also was 
 Mons. Petitpierre from Geneva, the Protestant minister of 
 whom I have already spoken. While I was busy preparing 
 the meal, Mr. Stenhouse and the two English Elders went to 
 the post-office to get their letters, for at that time they were 
 expecting important news. When they returned, breakfast 
 was quite ready, and they took their seats at the table. I 
 asked if there were any letters from England, and my hus- 
 band said : " No ; no letters, but there is a Star, and it con- 
 tains the Revelation on Polygamy." 
 
 He handed me a copy of the Millennial Star— 2, Mormon 
 paper published in Liverpool — and as I took it, I felt as if I 
 
"celestial marriage." 135 
 
 were receiving my death-warrant : — it was indeed the death- 
 warrant to all my hopes of happiness. I rose from the table, 
 asking them to excuse me ; and overcome with agitation and 
 conflicting emotions, I retired to my own chamber. There, for 
 the first time, I read that document which has since brought 
 such sorrow and misery to so many wronged and heart- 
 broken women. The reader may perhaps like to see the only 
 foundation and authority for the practice of Polygamy, ever 
 produced by the Mormon leaders. So I copy exactly from 
 the Millennial StcOr, what I then read, leaving out only a few 
 hnes here and there, which had no special reference to the 
 subject, but helped to swell the size of the "revelation :" 
 
 CELESTIAL MARRIAGE : 
 
 A REVELATION ON THE PATRIARCHAL ORDER OF MATRIMONY, OR 
 PLURALITY OF WIVES. 
 
 Given to Joseph Smith, the Seer, in Nawvoo, jfuly 12th, 1843. 
 
 1. Verily, thus saith the Lord, unto you, my servant Joseph, that inasmuch ail 
 you have inquired of my hand, to know and understand wherein I, the Lord, 
 justified my servants, Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob; as also Moses, David, and 
 Solomon, my servants, aS touching the principle and doctrine of their having 
 many wives and concubines : Behold ! and lo, I am the Lord thy God, and will 
 answer thee as touching this matter : Therefore prepare thy heart to receive and 
 obey the instructions which I am abonf to give unto you ; for all those who have 
 this law revealed unto them must obey the same ; for behold ! I reveal unto you 
 a new and everlasting covenant, and if ye abide not that covenant, then are ye* 
 damned ; for no one can reject this covenant, and be permitted to enter into my 
 glory ; for all who Will have a blessing at my hands shall abide the law which 
 was appointed for that blessing, and the conditions thereof, as was instituted 
 frorh before the foundations of the world : and as pertaining to the new and 
 everlasting Covenant, it was instituted for the fulness of my glory ; and he that 
 Teceiveth a fulness thereof, must and shall abide the law, or he shall be damned, 
 saith the Lord God. 
 
 2. And verily I say unto you, that the conditions of this law are these : All 
 Covenants, contracts, bonds, obligations, oaths, vows, performances, coimections, 
 associations, 6r expectations! that are not made or entered into, and sealed, by 
 the Holy Spirit of promise, of him who is annointed both as well for time and 
 for all eternity, and that too most holy, by revelation and commandment, through 
 the medium of mine anointed, whom I have appointed on the earth to hold this 
 power, (and I have appointed unto my servant Joseph to hold this power in the 
 last days, and there is never but one on the earth at a time; on whom this power 
 and the keys of the priesthood are conferred), are of no efficacy, virtue, or force, 
 
 9 
 
136 MATRIMONY REVISED. 
 
 in and after the resurrection from tlie dead : for all contracts that are not made 
 unto this end, have an end when men are dead. 
 
 4. Therefore, if a man marry him a wife in the world, and he marry her not 
 by me, nor by my word ; and he covenant with her so long as he is in the world, 
 and she with him; their covenant and marriage is not of force when they are 
 dead, and when they are out of the world ; therefore they are not bound by any 
 law when they are out of the world ; therefore, when they are out of the world, 
 they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are appointed angels in 
 heaven, which angels are ministering servants, to minister for those who are 
 worthy of a far more, and an exceeding, and an eternal weight of glory; for these 
 angels did not abide my law, therefore they cannot be enlarged, but remain 
 separately and singly, without exaltation, in their saved condition, to all eternity, 
 and from henceforth are not gods, but are angels of God for ever and ever. 
 
 5. And again, verily I say unto you, if a man marry a wife, and make a cov- 
 enant with her for time, and for all eternity, if that covenant is not by me, or .by 
 my word, which is my law, and is not sealed by the Holy Spirit of promise, 
 through him whom I have anointed and appointed unto this power, then it is 
 not valid, neither of force, when they are out of the world, because they are not 
 joined by me, saith the Lord, neither by my word ; when they are out of the 
 world, it cannot be received there, because the angels and the gods are appointed 
 there, by whom they cannot pass ; they cannot, therefore, inherit my glory, for 
 my house is a house of order, saith the Lord God. 
 
 6. And again, verily I say unto you, if a man marry a wife by my word, which 
 is my law, and by the new and everlasting covenant, and it is sealed unto them 
 by the Holy Spirit of promise, by him who is anointed, unto whom I have 
 appointed this power, and the keys of this priesthood, and it shall be said unto 
 them. Ye shall come forth in the first resurrection ; and if it be after the first 
 resurrection, in the next resurrection; and shall inherit thrones, kingdoms, 
 principalities, and powers, dominions, all heights and depths — then shall it be 
 written in the Lamb's Book of Life, that he shall commit no murder whereby to 
 shed innocent blood ; and if ye abide in my covenant, and commit no murder 
 whereby to shed innocent blood, it shall be done unto them in all things whatso- 
 ever my servant hath put upon them, in time, and through all eternity, and shall 
 be of full force when they are out of the world ; and they shall pass by the 
 angels, and the gods, which are set there, to their exaltation and glory in all 
 things, as hath been sealed upon their heads, which glory shall be a fulness and 
 a continuation of the seeds for ever and ever. 
 
 7. Then shall they be gods, because they have no end ; therefore shall they 
 be from everlasting to everlasting, because they continue ; then shall they.be 
 above all, because all things are subject unto them. Then shall they be gods, 
 because they have all power, and the angels are subject unto them. 
 
 9. Verily, verily I say unto you, if a man marry a wife according to my word, 
 and they are sealed by the Holy Spirit of promise, according to mine appoint- 
 ment, and he or she shall commit any sin or transgression of the new and ever- 
 lasting covenant whatever, and all manner of blasphemies, and if they commit 
 no murder, wherein they shed innocent blood— yet they shall come forth in the 
 
THE COMMISSION OF THE KEYS. 1 37 
 
 first resurrection, and enter into their exaltation, but they shall be destroyed in 
 the flesh, and shall be delivered unto the buffetings of Satan, unto the day of 
 redemption, saith the Lord God. 
 
 10. The blasphemy against the Holy Ghost, which shall not be forgiven in this 
 virorld, nor out of the vf orld, is in that ye commit murder, wherein ye shed inno- 
 cent blood, and assent unto my death, after ye have received my new and ever- 
 lasting covenant, saith the Lord God ; and he that abidcth not this law can in no 
 wise enter into my glory, but shall be damned, saith the Lord. 
 
 13. God commanded Abraham, and Sarah gave Hagar to Abraham, to wife. 
 And why did she do it ? Because this was the law, and from Hagar sprang 
 many people. This, therefore, was fulfilling, among other things, the promises. 
 Was Abraham, therefore, under condemnation ? Verily, I say unto you, Nay; 
 for I, the Lord, commanded it. Abraham was commanded to offer his son 
 Isaac ; nevertheless, it was written, Thou shalt not kill. Abraham, however, 
 did not refuse, and it was accounted to him for righteousness. 
 
 14. Abraham received concubines, and they bare hipi children, and it was 
 accounted unto him for righteousness, because they were given unto him, and he 
 abode in my law : as Isaac also, and Jacob did none other things than that 
 which they were commandecl, they have entered into their exaltation, according 
 to the promises, and sit upon thrones ; and are not angels, but are gods. David 
 also received many wives and concubines, as also Solomon, and Moses my 
 servant ; as also many others of my servants, from the beginning of creation 
 until this time ; and in nothing did they sin, save in those things which they 
 received not of me. 
 
 1 5. David's wives and concubines were given unto him of me, by the hand of 
 Nathan, my servant, and others of the prophets who had the keys of this 
 power ; and in none of these things did he sin against me, save in the case of 
 Uriah and his wife ; and therefore, he hath fallen from his exaltation, and 
 received his portion ; and he shall not inherit them out of the world ; for I gave 
 them unto another, saith the Lord. 
 
 16. I am the Lord thy God, and I gave unto thee, my servant Joseph, an 
 
 appointment, and restore all things ; I have conferred 
 
 upon you the keys and power of the Priesthood, wherein I restore all tljings, and 
 make known unto you all things, in due time. 
 
 17. And verily, verily I say unto you, that whatsoever you seal on earth shall 
 be sealed in heaven ; and whatsoever you bind on earth, in my name, and by my 
 word, saith the Lord, it shall be eternally bound in the heavens ; and whoseso- 
 ever sins you remit on earth shall be remitted eternally in the heavens ; and 
 whosesoever sins you retain on earth shall be retained in heaven. 
 
 18. .And again, verily I say, whomsoever you bless I will bless, and whomso- 
 ever you curse I vrill curse, saith the Lord ; for I, the Lord, am thy God. 
 
 19. And again, verily I say unto you, my servant Joseph, that whatsoever you 
 give on earth, and to whomsoever you give any one on earth, by my word, and 
 according to my law, it shall be visited with blessings. 
 
 20. Verily I say unto you, a commandment I give unto mine handmaid Emma 
 Smith your wife , ... let mine handmaid, Emma Smith, receive all those 
 
138 .'HOW TO TAKE EXTRA WIVES. ■■ 
 
 that have been given unto my servant Joseph, and who are virtuous and pure 
 before me ; and those who are not pure, and have said they were pure, shall be 
 destroyed, saith the Lord God !....! give unto my servant Joseph, that 
 he shall be made ruler over many things, for he hath been faithful over a feT* 
 things, and from henceforth I will strengthen him. 
 
 21. And I command mine handmaid, Emma Smith, to abide and cleave unt<? 
 my servant Joseph, and to none else. But if she will not abide this command- 
 ment, she shall be destroyed, saith the Lord ; for I am the Lord thy God, and 
 will destroy her if she abide not in my law ; but if she will not abide this com- 
 mandment, then shall my servant Joseph do all things for her, even as he hath 
 said ; and I will bless him, and multiply him, and give i^nto him a hundred fold 
 in this world, of fathers and mothers, brothers and sisters, houses and lands, 
 wives and children, and crowns of eternal lives in the eternal worlds. And 
 again, verily I say, let mine handmaid forgive my servant Joseph his trespasses, 
 and then shall she be forgiven he): trespasses, wherein she has trespassed against 
 me ; and I, the Lord thy God, will bless her, and multiply her, and make her 
 heart to rejoice. 
 
 24. And again, as pertaining to the law of the priesthood : If any man espouse 
 a virgin, and desire to espouse another, and the first give her consent ; and if he 
 espouse the second, and they are virgins, and have vowed to no other man, then 
 is he justified ; he cannot commit adultery, for they are given him ; for he can- 
 not commit adultery with that that belongeth unto him, and to none else ; and if 
 he have ten virgins given unto him by this law, he cannot commit adultery, for 
 they belong to him ; and they are given unto him — therefore is he justified. But 
 if one or either of the ten virgins, after she is espoused, shall be with another 
 man, she has committed adultery, and shall be destroyed j for they are given 
 unto him to multiply and replenish the earth, according to my commandment, 
 and to fulfil the promise which was given by my Father before the foundation of 
 the world ; and for their exaltation in the eternal worlds, that they may bear the 
 souls of men ; for herein is the work of my Father continued, that He may be 
 glorified. 
 
 25. And again, verily, verily I say unto you, if any man have a wife who holds 
 the keys of this power, and he teaches unto her the law of my priesthood, as 
 pertaining to these things ; then shall she believe and administer unto him, or 
 she shall be destroyed, saith the Lord your God ; for I will destroy her ; for 
 I will magnify my name upon all those who receive and abide in my law. 
 Therefore, it shall be lawful in me, if she receive not this law, for him to receive 
 all things whatsoever I, the Lord his God, will give unto him, because she did 
 not believe and administer unto him, according to my word ; and she then 
 becomes the transgressor, and he is exempt from the law of Sarah, who admin- 
 istered unto Abraham according to the law, when I commanded Abraham to 
 take Hagar to wife. And now, as pertaining to this law : Verily, verily I say 
 unto you, I will reveal more unto you, hereafter ; therefore, let this suffice for 
 the present. Behold, I am Alpha and Omega. Amen. 
 
 And this 'was the " revelation ! " — this mass of confusion, 
 cunning absurdity, falsehood, and bad grammar! TAii was 
 
HOW THIS "revelation" CAME TO ME. 1 39 
 
 the celebrated document which was henceforth to be law to 
 the confiding men and women who had embraced Mormonism ! 
 Looking at it now ; noting its inconsistencies and its flagrant 
 outrage upon common decency and morality, I can hardly 
 credit that I should ever have been such a silly dupe as to 
 give it a second thought. And yet, what could I do .' I was 
 bound hand and foot, as it were, and my very vision itself 
 was distorted. Unquestioning obedience, we had been 
 taught, was the highest virtue ; rebellion was as the sin of 
 witchcraft. L had, been convinced of the truth of some of the 
 tenets of the Mormon faith, and confident in them, I accepted 
 without question all the rest. Never, till the possibility that 
 polygamy might some day be acknowledged by the Church, 
 began to be whispered among the Saints — never did a solitary 
 doubt respecting my religion intrude itself upon my mind ; 
 and after my apprehensions were fairly aroused by those 
 rumors, whenever I felt the faintest shadow of unbelief or 
 suspicion arising in my heart, I banished it as an unholy 
 thing. The time had not yet come when I cpuld judge dis- 
 passionately : the " revelation " aroused within me feelings of 
 horror and dismay, but I did not dare to question its authen- 
 tfcity. It brought bitterness to my soul, but I believed it was 
 from God, and that I must learn to bear the cross patiently. 
 
 I did not at that time read the document through from 
 beginning to end. No ; my indignation was such that before 
 I had read half of it I threw it from me in anger. Perhaps if 
 I had read it all, and considered it carefully, my own judg- 
 ment and my sense of right and wrong might have pointed 
 out its absurdity and wickedness. But I was far from being 
 tranquil enough to think calmly. I felt bitterly that this new 
 doctrine was a degradation to woman, and I wondered why 
 God should see fit to humiliate my sex in this way. I was 
 willing to devote myself, my life, my all to His service, but 
 wherefore should He doom me to everlasting sorrow. 
 
 What now was to be a woman's lot among the Mormons > 
 A life without hope ! Who can express the terrible meaning 
 of those words — without hope! Yet so it was. Hereaftei 
 
140 ALONE AND IN TROUBLE. 
 
 our hearts were to be daily and hourly trampled upon ; the 
 most sacred feelings of our sex were to be outraged, our affec- 
 tions* were to be crushed ; — henceforth we were to be nothing 
 by ourselves ; without a husband, we were told, we could not 
 even enter heaven ! But had our trials been limited to this 
 life we might have borne them, as many a weary soul has 
 done, waiting for the relief of death. But death was to bring 
 no hope to us : we were told that in the other world Polygamy 
 should be the only order of marriage, and that without it none 
 could be exalted in glory. We were told these things by men 
 Who we believed were true and holy men of God; and we 
 trusted in them. 
 
 Rebellious I felt, indeed, as I paced the room after I had 
 thrown the Revelation on the ground : I almost felt as if I 
 should lose my reason. A woman in the time of trouble 
 always looks to some one in whom she can confide ; but to 
 whom could I turn for one kind or cheering word — who would 
 comfort me 1 I had neither relation or friend to whom I 
 could speak of this trial ; there Was no one who could under- 
 stand me. I could not turn to my husband in this sorrow, and 
 I dared not even kneel to my God to implore His aid. It was 
 He, they said, who had declared this revelation was His will" ; 
 how then could I turn to Him 1 No ; my heart sank within 
 me ; henceforth there was to be no hope, no peace for me ! 
 
 There was a knock at my chamber door, and my husband 
 came in. He knew how acutely I must feel, and he came to 
 comfort me. I was almost choked with emotion and tears, 
 but he threw his arms round me tenderly and spoke to me as 
 if I had been a child that needed consolation. He tried to 
 persuade me that God as a loving Father could never have 
 intended the pain or misery of his children, and that when we 
 came to understand the doctrine better, we should find that 
 all would be well He spoke also of his own unchanging 
 attachment, and appealed to me whether I thought he could 
 ever love me less or place his affections on another. 
 
 I tried to believe, and when I felt a little better I went with 
 him -to the breakfast room where the others were waiting for us. 
 
AN OLD MANS IDEA OF ISHMAEL. I4I 
 
 We were not a very entertaining party that morning. The 
 Elders present, of course knew what had kept me in my 
 room, and their attempt at cheerfulness was not very success- 
 ful. My husband was in sympathy with me, and I have no 
 doubt that I looked sad enough. There was only one person 
 present who did not appreciate the situation — Monsieur 
 Petitpierre, the Protestant minister — and they handed the 
 . Revelation to him. Mr. Stenhouse and the other Elders had 
 some misgivings as to how he would receive it, and they were 
 afraid it might disgust him with Mormonism. But the old 
 gentleman stood fhe test bravely, and I saw then, as I have 
 seen since, that men can be easily satisfied that the Revelation 
 on Polygamy, or any other revelation, is divine, if they desire 
 it to be so. 
 
 Here was old Monsieur Petitpierre, a man of more than 
 three score years, and childless. To him the example of 
 Abraham and Solomon appeared most instructive — an ex- 
 ample which might be followed with advantage. His wife, 
 like Sarah of old, had never been called by a mother's name ; 
 and now although, thus far, he had no idea who might act the 
 part of a second Hagar, there seemed a fair chance that a 
 little Ishmael might perpetuate the race of Petitpierres on 
 earth, if only the Revelation was acted upon by the faithful. 
 
 " It ought to be prayerfully thought of," he said. 
 
 Prayerfully thought of ! Poor, silly old man ! Before then 
 I had respect for his years and learning ; but now — what could 
 I think of a man who talked such nonsense .■' Had the revela- 
 tion told him that the wife of his youth, now tottering in step, 
 and with hair silvered by age, was commanded to take two or 
 a dozen young husbands — I wondered whether he would have 
 added with such satisfaction : " It ought to be prayerfully 
 thought of ! " 
 
 From that day I learned to regard polygamy as an essential 
 part of the Mormon faith, and such for many years the world 
 has considered it ; but when I first joined the Church, such 
 an innovation would have appeared to the European Saints 
 beyond the wildest fancies of a dream 
 
CHAPTER X. 
 
 MISSIONARY WORK:— TEACHING POLYGAMY. 
 
 Preaching Polygamy — A Phase of Missionary Life — ^An Embarrassing Position 
 — Bearing the Cross — One Ever-Present Thought — The Haunting Spectre of 
 My Life — My Little Daughter Clara — The Work of Repentance — Why Men 
 are Sent on Mission — Working in the Dark — ^Days and Nights of Prayer and 
 Fasting — Preparing for Work — Breaking the News — My First Convert — The 
 Victim Chosen — The "Beauties" of "Celestial Matrimony" — Introducing a 
 Pleasant Subject — "Came Down Stairs Singing" — A Cruel Task — "Does 
 My Serge Believe This? "— " I Tried to Comfort Her"— Not Wisely, but Too 
 Well — How the Swiss Women Received the Revelation — ^A Companion in 
 Misery — A Letter from Mary Burton — Polygamy in England — Elder Shrews- 
 bury in Diificulties — Love and Religion — How Polygamy Was Denied— 
 Looking Most Miserable — "He Kissed My Hand Sorrowfully." 
 
 I NOW entered upon a new phase of my Missionary life ; 
 the Elders assured me that it was my duty to teach 
 Polygamy to the women of Switzerland. 
 
 Hitherto, although I had suffered much from poverty and 
 privation, my work as a Missionary had been very pleasant.' 
 I believed with my whole heart all that I taught, and my best' 
 wishes for the people around me were that they might 
 become altogether such as I was, except in my sufferings. 
 
 Now, however, all this was changed. It was no longer sal- 
 vation through faith in Christ, or repentance, or baptism ; it 
 was no longer love and peace for this world and the promise 
 of everlasting joy in rthe world to come, that I was called upon 
 to teach. My task hitherto had been a labor of love ; now 
 it was to be a weary work of pain. How could I teach 
 the sisters, the affection of whose guileless hearts I had 
 won to myself — ^how could I teach them that which my own 
 
THE SPECTRE OF MY DREAMS. I43 
 
 heart abhorred, a doctrine which I hated with my whole 
 9oul! 
 
 How I strove against my rebellious nature : how I battled 
 with myself! That God had sent the Revelation I never 
 questioned, and all rebellion to His will I knew must be 
 sinful. I had no thought of evading the responsibility : my 
 heart must be subdued. It might be subdued ; it might be 
 crushed and broken, but I could never again, I felt, be truly 
 happy. I tried to reason with myself and to persuade myself 
 that it was I who was to blame and not the Revelation. If the 
 Ii,ord required me to submit, it must be for some good pur- 
 pose, and I must not refuse the cross that He called upon me 
 to bear. Sometimes for a few moments something would 
 attract my attention and divert my thoughts ; but the terrible 
 reality — Polygamy, refused to be ignored, and I felt all the 
 more bitterly afterwards. I never was happy, for life had 
 lost its charm to me. Ere I slept at night one dreadful 
 thought was haunting my pillow, — ^it disturbed my very 
 dreams, — and when I awoke in the morning, it was with a 
 feverish apprehension of coming evil hanging over me. All 
 through the long, weary day it haunted my footsteps like a 
 spectre, and like a fearful blight that had fallen upon me it 
 seemed to be withering my soul. One thought was ever 
 present in my mind — that thought, Polygamy ! 
 
 It can be no wonder that I lost all interest in life, and that 
 I should almost wish to die rather than live that life of degra- 
 dation which I dreaded would be mine. But death iiies from 
 those who woo her ; the wretched, the weary, the hopeless, 
 they find her not. I felt that there was no rest for me. My 
 only comfort was in my children ; no revelation, I felt, could 
 change ikeir relationship to me. But over my little daughter 
 Clara I mourned, for I thought if this revelation were acted 
 upon by the Saints, as doubtless it would be, she would some 
 day be called upon to suffer as I did. How little did I then, 
 however, anticipate in what way my fears would be realised ! 
 My Clara is now the daughter-in-law of Brigham Young, 
 having married his eldest son, Joseph A. Young. 
 
144 TEACHING POLYGAMV. 
 
 I am afraid at that time I was somewhat" of a trial to my' 
 husband, for my heart was not yet quite subdued. I grews 
 impatient at the wrong which I felt had been done to me, and 
 I often said bitter things against the Prophet of the Lord and 
 all his sex, including my husband, who was then, and for 
 years after, a devoted Mormon, and was quite horrified at 
 what I said. He often told me that I was a great hindrance to 
 him, and that it was impossible for any one who lived with me 
 to enjoy the Spirit of God, — and I was afraid that he only 
 spoke the truth. 
 
 Then I repented, and sought to chasten myself; and I fasted 
 and pra.yed and asked forgiveness of God and my husband. 
 But even when most subdued I was as unhappy as ever, and 
 some one was sure to say something which reminded me of 
 my trouble, and whenever the Elders came to the house they 
 were sure to discuss the one painful topic. Then my indig- 
 nant feelings all came back again, and I felt the spirit of rebel- 
 lion stirring within me. I could not help it, for I felt that 
 woman's nature itself was insulted by the degrading doctrine, 
 and any mention of it excited my anger. 
 
 My husband and the Elders had anticipated that I would 
 not readily submit, and they bore with me as patiently as they 
 could, losing no opportunity of strengthening me in the faith, 
 ever keeping before me the obligation that rested upon me 
 in particular to explain the doctrine to the Swiss sisters. 
 They knew very well that nothing tends more to confirm the 
 faith of the wavering than setting them to teach others. Brig- 
 ham Young has always acted on this principle, and whenever 
 any of the brethren have evinced signs of doubt or disaffection 
 they have been at once despatched on Mission. Their efforts 
 to convert others, established their own faith. 
 
 Among the Swiss we had never spoken on Polygamy or any 
 kindred subject, and we were therefore spared the hurniliation 
 which the British Elders experienced in having to retract their 
 own teachings. Nevertheless, Mr. Stenhouse and the other 
 Elders felt great anxiety as to how the new doctrine would be 
 received. My husband did not at once openly tell them that 
 
THE FIRST VICTIM, I45 
 
 such a" Revelation had been sent from Zion; but whenever an 
 opportunity presented he took them aside singly and spoke to 
 them about the ancient patriarchs who practiced Polygamy ; 
 and so great was his influence with the converts that he soon 
 won them over to the new teaching, and made them feel that 
 they would not be justified in rejecting the Revelation. Many 
 of the Swiss Saints before their conversion had been more 
 Socialists than Christians, and they probably thought that this 
 change in the marriage institution was a sign of advancing in- 
 tellectual supremacy ; but their wives were very far from shar- 
 ing these opinions with them. 
 
 After many days and nights of prayer and fasting I prepared 
 myself for my work. To a certain extent I had brought my 
 own self under control, or I thought I had, and I almost felt 
 anxious to begin, so that I might get over the painful scenes 
 which I fully anticipated. It was agreed that Madame Baliff, 
 of whom I have already spoken as being rather sceptical when 
 my child recovered from her critical condition, should be the 
 first to whom the intelligence should be imparted, for it was 
 thought that if she accepted the Revelation without much diffi- 
 culty, the other sisters would be more easily won over. She 
 was a well-educated and intelligent woman, and had seen a 
 good deal of the world. She had met her husband while trav- 
 elling in Russia, had married him, and they had returned to 
 their native land. She was in every respect a lady, but she 
 was a spoilt child and had her whims ; and she possessed a 
 great influence over the minds of the other sisters. On this ac- 
 count it was that she was selected as the victim to whom 
 should first be imparted the mysteries of the Revelation, for it 
 was thought that whatever reception she might give to Polyga- 
 my, her views would greatly influence the conduct of the rest. 
 
 As I before mentioned, Madame Baliff and her husband were 
 models of affection to one another, and it seemed to me quite 
 a sin that I should introduce into such a household a doctrine 
 which could only produce disunion and misery. I had, how- 
 ever, schooled my heart to what I thought was my duty, and 
 I strove to smother the rebellion rising within me. But, after 
 
i46 "l HESITATED STILL." 
 
 all it seemed to me hardly fair that I should be selected for this 
 painful task. These husbands had not courage enough, or were 
 ashamed, to tell their own wives about this wonderful Revela- 
 tion ; and so I, a weak woman, hating in my heart the doctrine 
 as much as a woman could hate — / was chosen to introduce 
 this pleasant subject, and to persuade those I loved to their 
 own ruin. I had had it all fully explained to me, and I thor- 
 oughly understood the beauties of the system in the sight of 
 the Elders, and what they considered the strong points in the 
 Revelation ; — but it is miserable work to try to convince others 
 of a thing that you yourself detest. 
 
 One day, quite unexpectedly to her, they had told Madame 
 Baliff that a new Revelation had been sent from Zion, and that 
 I would explain it to her; then Monsieur Baliff left the house 
 and remained absent until the wife whom he so devotedly 
 loved should have heard this new thing. 
 
 Madame Baliff came down stairs singing, in her usual gay 
 spirits, little expecting what she was going to hear ; and when 
 she came to me I felt so unfitted for my task that I dared not 
 look her straight in the face, although she was my dearest 
 friend and I had such an affection for her. I stood there, pale 
 and trembling, and she thought that I was not well ; — I was not 
 indeed well — I was sick at heart. Never before had the face 
 of a friend been so unwelcome. 
 
 She asked me what it was that I had to tell her ; and when' 
 I hesitatingly denied having wanted to speak to her at all, she 
 said she knew there must be something, as her husband had 
 told her so. 
 
 I hesitated still ; but at last found courage, and told her all. 
 It was a cruel task to impose upon me. Day after day I had 
 observed her and her husband, I had noticed their deep affec- 
 tion ; had seen her watching at the window for his return ; 
 and he would come with a little offering of choice fruit or flow- 
 ers : and I thought no woman could be happier than Madame 
 Baliff. And now for me to so cruelly awaken them from their 
 dream of bliss ! 
 
 She sat and listened eagerly as I told my story ; and when 
 
A WOMAN S INDIGNATION. I47 
 
 fit length she began to understand what was tneknt by it, she 
 thought that I must be playing some unseasonable joke upon 
 her, and showed as much in her countenance. But when she 
 saw that I really was in earnest, she sprang up and cried out : 
 " Oh, my God ! what a beastly religion ! How dared your 
 husband and you come to us Swiss with such a religion as 
 that?" My eyes sank before her as she turned on me with 
 mingled rage and disgust, as if she would wither me with her 
 contemptuous looks. I felt as humbled as if I myself had 
 been the author of the Revelation. 
 
 "And does my SSrge beheve this.'" she cried. 
 
 I assured her that he did believe it, and she paced the room, 
 to and fro, as if she would go crazy ; my heart ached for her. 
 She gave way to a perfect storm of rage, and then sobbed and 
 cried like a child who had lost its mother. I was silent, for I 
 knew how she must feel, and I felt that she would be relieved 
 by tears. I had gone through the trial all alone, without one 
 word from a woman's heart that could reach my own. And I 
 tried to comfort her. I remembered how I had felt myself, 
 and I believed that thus it was now with her. In an instant, 
 when I first realised that Polygamy had anything to do with 
 me, just as I have heard it said of dying men, all my past life 
 rushed to my remembrance, and every word or deed of love 
 therein, stood out in brightest reality. Thus I doubted not it 
 was with my friend. Every tender word which her husband 
 had ever uttered ; every loving deed he had ever done, came 
 to her recollection with a ten-fold dearness as she realised the 
 horrors which awaited her in the future. 
 
 How little did we either of us imagine the story she would 
 afterwards tell me in Utah ! 
 
 I tried to soothe her, and she threw her arms passionately 
 round me, and pressed me to her throbbing heart, and wept" 
 again. She thought of her husband and her little girls. But 
 with all her fears she dreamed not how miserable was the life 
 before her in poverty and Polygamy. She was herself hand" 
 some in form and fair in feature, and, in the full enjoyment of 
 all that could be desired in her sphere of life, she was as happy 
 
I4S TRAITORS TO OURSELVES. 
 
 as a youthful wife could be. She pictured to herself a time-^ 
 not now, her Serge loved her too truly ;«<?«'— when her hus- 
 band might cast his eyes upon some blooming damsel, younger 
 than she was then, and might begin to take a nearer interest 
 in Polygamy. She pictured him bestowing on the youthful 
 beauty the love and tenderness which he had always bestowed 
 on ^^/-;— how his affections would die out towards her; how her 
 heart would be desolate and alone ! 
 
 I took her hand in mine and spoke very gently to her, and 
 when she was calmer, I talked to her more freely. "We found 
 now, as we tried to look our common enemy in the face, how 
 strong a hold Mormonism had taken of us ; and it is in this 
 that persons unacquainted with the Saints have so greatly mis- 
 judged the women of Utah; they know how small a hold such 
 a religion — now they look upon Mormonism and Polygamy as 
 identical — would have upon them ; and they forget how all- 
 absorbing was our faith in Mormonism without Polygamy. We 
 confided not wisely, but too well. 
 
 Had Polygamy been an invention of our husbands, or a sys- 
 tem which they capriciously adopted, we might have been 
 grieved, but we should have known how to act, for we were in 
 a Christian country where women had rights as well as men ; 
 — it was our own hearts which were traitors to us. We had 
 been taught to regard Abraham and Jacob, and David and 
 Solomon as types of holiness, as men who were fit objects for 
 imitation ; and now it was proved to us, from Scripture, that 
 these men were Polygamists, and yet were blessed by God ; 
 and we were called upon to follow their example. Thus we 
 tried to crush out the remembrance of our own womanhood. 
 Had we but followed the light of reason which God had given 
 for our guide, we should have trampled in the dust that vile 
 burlesque upon the holy religion of Jesus, called a " Revelation 
 upon Celestial Marriage." As it was, the religious teachings 
 which we had received both before and after we embraced 
 Mormonism alike combined to blind us to the truth. 
 
 In this state of mind we knelt and prayed for the Lord to 
 increase our faith in that very doctrine which in our hearts we 
 
A COMPANION IN MISERY. 149 
 
 cursed and hated; and on our knees we wept again; and 
 natural feelings of repugnance mingled with an earnest strug- 
 gle to submit to the will of God. Madame Baliff had not so 
 much faith in Mormonism as I had, and she had consequently- 
 less to trouble her in that respect ; but she loved her husband, 
 and she knew that he was determined to go to Zion as soon 
 as he could, and then not only would all the luxuries of a happy 
 home be sacrificed, but all her anticipations of the future were 
 overshadowed by a terrible apprehension. Thus we were 
 equally troubled, though I had to endure most, as the task of 
 teaching fell upon me. I did at last manage to persuade her 
 not to offer any active opposition to the revelation, but I could 
 not satisfy her that all was right. She even went so far as to 
 promise to try to overcome her own feelings, for if it was really 
 true she did not wish to be found fighting against the Lord. 
 She had, however, hardly ceased speaking when the thought 
 of her little daughters crossed her mind and once more she 
 paced the room like an enraged tigress, declaring angrily 
 that "nO vile Polygamist should ever possess either of her 
 sweet girls." I had felt like this for my own darling Clara. 
 
 I had now a companion in misery — some one who could 
 sympathise with me. Even had my husband detested the doc- 
 trine, as I did, he could not have comforted me as a woman 
 and a mother could. My poor friend could feel as I felt, and 
 her sympathy was very dear to me — misery loves companion- 
 ship — we were sisters in affliction. Not only so — Madame 
 Baliff declared that this painful task should not rest on me 
 alone ; she would help me in speaking to the sisters. Thus 
 we helped each other in the time of our trouble. 
 
 It must have been about this time that I received another 
 letter from Mary Burton. The postmark is quite indistinct, 
 but a week or two one way or the other does not signify 
 much. In her usual quick and impulsive way she gave me 
 her v'lsvfs of the "beauties" of Polygamy, and perhaps the 
 reader would like to hear what she said. 
 
 I am very miserable, Sister Stenhouse, and furiously indig- 
 nant. I little thought when I last wrote to you that I should have such news to 
 tell ; but I suppose you know it all without my saying a word. How we all felt 
 
IS'O HOW THE SAI'NTS IN ENGLANt) RECEI'i'feD POLYGAMY. 
 
 when we first learned that Polygamy was tfue, no words of mine can describe ; 
 we hardly dared look one another in the face. Let me tell you how it was. 
 
 One night, quite late, Elder Shrewsbury came round in a hurry, and asked to 
 see me. I went down into the parlour to meet him, and Mrs. Elsworth came 
 down also, and remained until he went away. Elder Shrewsbury looked very 
 Strange that night, just like a man who had been doing something wrong and 
 was ashamed of it — :and well he might feel so. He began by talking to Mrs. 
 Elsworth about the weather, and when they had both said aU they could think of 
 on that interesting and original subject, we all three sat silent for some time. 
 Elder Shrewsbury at last spoke. 
 
 He excused himself for coming so late, but he said he had only just received 
 some important news, and could not rest until he had seen us. He had been 
 round at the Conference-house, and had there seen a good many of the Elders. 
 They were all talking earnestly upon the same subject, for that day they had 
 received not only letters from the Apostle at Liverpool, but also copies of the 
 Millennial Star, with the Revelation in it, which I suppose you have seen. Of 
 course it was impossible for them to doubt any longer, but most of them felt it 
 was a cruel blow. Elder Shrewsbury said they looked at one another, but did 
 not dare to speak. Nearly all of them had been anxiously trying to get rid of 
 the false scandal, as they supposed the accusation of Polygamy to be ; and in 
 public in their sermons, and in private to all the weak brethren, they had over 
 and over again solemnly declared that Polygamy was unheard of among the 
 Saints, that it was a Gentile lie ; and they had proved from the Bible, and from 
 the Book of Mormon, that a doctrine so sinful could never be believed or prat- 
 ticed by God's people. 
 
 Now, all this would be thrown in their teeth. Those who hated Mormonism 
 would revile them for it, and, worse still, the Saints themselves would despise 
 and doubt them for the lies which many of them had innocently told. Who 
 could tell where all this would end? When they were found to have been 
 deceived in a matter like Polygamy, about which it was so easy to arrive at facts 
 and certainty, who would trust them concerning other doctrines which depended 
 upon their veracity and testimony alone ? 
 
 Then, too, there was worse to be said about the American Elders and Apos- 
 tles. Who could believe that Orson Pratt or Lorenzo Snow knew nothing of 
 Polygamy ? And yet they denied it in the most solemn way. And, oh. Sister 
 Stenhouse, think of the Apostle Taylor calling God to witness his truth when 
 he proved from the Book Of Covenants that there was no such thing as Poly- 
 gamy : and all the while he had himself five wives in Salt Lake City ! Oh, my ! 
 This is dreadful. Whether the doctrine is true or not, I can never believe that 
 God would forgive all that abominable lying about it. 
 
 But I was telling you of that evening; 
 
 Elder Shrewsbury told us all this, but he spoke slowly and disjointedly, like a 
 man whose mind is troubled. He said he hardly knew what he was doing. 
 Then he gave Mrs. Elsworth a copy of the Star, and he asked me, too, to read 
 the Revelation carefully before I condemned it 
 
 " If the Revelation, as you call it, allows Polygamy," I exclaimed, "it is a lie, 
 and I hate and despise it, and you, and Mormonism, and all I" I was quite in a 
 fury, and I didt&eX as if I hated him then. 
 
"NICE FOOD FOR BABES !" I5I 
 
 He did not answer me ; he seemed too cut up to utter a word, but I did not 
 pity him. I felt that men who would write such a revelation as that for their 
 own wicked purposes deserved all the hatred which the cruellest heart could 
 muster up — they were loathesome to any pure-minded woman. Then we went 
 down stairs, for I generally go to see him out He took my hand in his to shake 
 it, and he held it there, although I tried to take it away, and he said mourn- 
 fully, " Sister Mary, I know you have good cause for anger ; but be just. I 
 have been jCist as much deceived as ever you have been. It has unsettled all 
 my faith ; even our best and most tried Missionaries are shrinking from it. Do 
 not blame me for what I have not done. I never deceived you about it." 
 
 " How can I tell that ?" I said. " If the Aposdes thought nothing of deceiv- 
 ing us and perjuring themselves, how can I trust any one ? If they had only 
 held their tongues, I sho^d have thought it wrong for them to passively let us 
 be deceived ; but you yourself know how solemnly they affirmed that it was all 
 false. I tell you fairly, I hate them." 
 
 The Apostles, he said, had told some who were strong enough in the faith to 
 bear it, all the truth, but they gave us milk, as the Bible says, because we were 
 babes and our faith was weak. 
 
 " Nonsense !" I said, " to tell me such stuff as that ! As if the Bible called 
 lies and perjury 'milk!' Nice food for babes, indeed ! Why, it's blasphemy 
 even to talk so 1" 
 
 " I cannot help it. Sister Mary," he said : — " I am more sorry than I can tell 
 you — but what can I do ?" 
 
 I did not answer him, and after a few moments, during which he still held my 
 hand in his, he said : — " Mary, I want to speak to you alone about these things ; 
 I have much that I want to say, and I don't want Mrs. Elsworth to be with us. 
 Can I see you, to-morrow evening, if I call t Can I speak with you for half an 
 hour by ourselves .•"' 
 
 " I wish you would not call me ' Mary,' any more. Elder Shrewsbury," I said ; 
 " it is too familiar now. We have been far too friendly, but, thank God, I have 
 found out in time, and know how to act. I hardly think I ought to let you call 
 me Sister Mary even ; — there can be no brotherhood or sisterhood with Poly- 
 gamy ; but I don't want to be unkind to you." Then I told him that he might 
 come as he said, and that I would ask Mrs. Elsworth to let me see him. 
 
 He went away looking most miserable, and Mrs. Elsworth scolded me for 
 being so long at the door. I suppose she thought we were love-making, but 
 she was greatly mistaken. She did not seem much pleased or vexed about the 
 Revelation, and she told me that she knew quite well before that it would come 
 some day ; and as she said that there was a peculiar look of determination about 
 her mouth that I had never noticed before. I felt sure at once that she had 
 formed a plan of some kind, that she would carry it out if it cost her her life. 
 
 Then I went to my own room, and tried to think the matter out. If I were 
 married, as you are. Sister Stenhouse, and if my husband believed in the Revela- 
 tion, I think I should go crazy. As it was, I felt it terribly. You know, dear, I 
 told you that I liked Elder Shrewsbury very well, but nothing more. Well, that 
 was very true then, but now I know that it was not all the truth. I take care 
 that he shall never know what I think of him, but, entre nous, I know that he is 
 not the same to me as other people. I do not think I love him ; no, I'm sure I 
 
 10 
 
IS2 LOVE-MAKING UNDER DIFFICULTIES. 
 
 dort't nmi) ; but I do feel' a great deal of interest in him. That night, however, 
 I felt very bad at him. That he had been deceived, I knew, and also that he 
 must have felt sorry for having' deceived me ; and, if he cares for me, he must 
 have felt uneasy for what I might say or do,, now the doctrine was proclaimed. 
 But I thought that as a man he ought to have shown more courage, and not ta 
 have appeared so thoroughly frightened before a girl like me. 
 
 Well, the more I thought of it, the more angry I became, and I couldn't sleep 
 all night The next morning I wrote a little note to Elder Shrewsbury, saying 
 that after all that had happened, I had fully resolved not to see him agaiiii. 
 Many of ihy friends, I said, were married and could not help themselves, but I( 
 both could and would. The Mormon sisters I should ever pity and love ; but as 
 for the Mormon men, I would never have anything to do with one of them asi 
 long as I lived. I did not want, to be unkind to him personally, but I reallji 
 could not trust any one now. 
 
 Then I showed this note to Mrs. Elsworth, and asked her to give it to Elder 
 Shrewsbury that night when he came. 
 
 He came, of course, and he came again and again ; but I would not see him ; 
 and I did not even go to the meetings for fear of coming across him there. He 
 had long talks with Mrs. Elsworth, and tried to get her to interfere, and at last 
 he sent me a long letter, entreating me not to refuse him. I was cooler now, 
 and when Mrs. Elsworth said I ought at least to see him, even if I dismissedi 
 him then, I agreed to do so, and the next night he came. 
 
 He was very humble that night. You know what torrents of eloquence he 
 pours forth about anything that interests him, and how earnest he is. But then 
 all his eloquence had fled. He hesitated and blundered until I really quite 
 pitied him. He came and sat by me, and would have taken my hand, but I 
 would not let him. He did not tell me that he loved me, but he spoke as if I 
 were conscious of the fact, and you know, of course, I couldn't help feeling thai 
 he cared for me, whether he spoke about it or not. He assured me over and 
 over again that though he had often heard the scandal — as I had done — he did 
 not for a moment believe it ; he said that he should never himself act up to the 
 Revelation ; that if he loved it should 'be an undivided and all-absorbing love j 
 that he would rather have less glory in eternity, with one whom he could idolize^ 
 than obey the Revelation on Polygamy, and obtain a higher position. 
 
 All this time he hardly once looked at me, but when I did see his eyes tfiey 
 seemed very sorrowful and very earnest. I confess to you that what he said 
 made me feel very differently for him. For a man of his ability and talents, who 
 has such an influence, and wins so much respect from every one he meets, to be 
 sitting there all bashful, like a naughty child, before a young girl like me, and 
 all because he loved me, made me feel for him a pity which was very near to 
 love. 
 
 Blit'it was not love quite; and I did not let him read my thoughts. I asked 
 him to tell me all he knew, and to explain to me the meaning of different parts 
 of the Revelation which were rather obscure to me ; and he did so. Then he 
 tried to shake my resolution, and so anxious and troubled did he seem, that I 
 tealiy do think that if I had asked him to give up Mormonism altogether, h* 
 would have done so for my sake. I told him that I had quite resolved, now that 
 Polygainy was acknowledged, never to see him again, except as I might see tW 
 
DECIDED MEASURES : — MARY DISMISSES HER LOVER. 1 53 
 
 Other Elders at meeting. I said I believed I was still a good Mormon, as Mor- 
 mons used to be, but I would never receive Polygamy, or be more than an ordi- 
 nary friend to any one who did believe it We talked together a good deal, 
 and we sat silently together a long while ; and at last he rose to go. He kissed 
 my hand sorrowfully — and I didn't like to be vexed with him for doing so, he 
 looked so doleful — and he said he'd wait and wait, ever so long, if I wanted him 
 to do so ; but that he would hope on, trusting that some day I might change. I 
 told him I thought — I knew I should never change. 
 
 After that I only saw him. at meeting. And, oh dear ! you should see what 
 meetings we have now I Half the people don't attend, and everything is so 
 cold and lifeless. Some of our most earnest Elders never come ; and it is said 
 among the brethren, that Polygamy will produce the greatest apostasy which the 
 Church has ever seen. Every one seems ashamed of it 
 
 And now, dear, I have written you a terrible long letter, but you must please 
 forgive me, for I have no one to whom I can open my heart except to you. I 
 wish I had some keepsake to remember you by. Well, I don't mean that, but I 
 should so like to have your portrait Did you not once tell me that Elder Sten- 
 hous'e talked of learning photography ? Does he ever practice it now .' And if 
 so, couldn't you get him to take a shadow of yourself ? I should so like to hava 
 one. Mine I will send you as soon as it is taken. I mean to write again to you 
 in the course of a day or two, and then I'll tell you what Elder Shrewsbury said 
 about the Revelation itself. Meanwhile, dear, kiss both the babies, please, for 
 me ; and write soon to your most affectionately loving, 
 
 Mary Burton." 
 
 Poor girl ! I said, as I folded up her letter ; but it is better 
 for her to suffer a little now than for her to have been married 
 first, as I was, and then, when too late to, go back, to have 
 Polygamy announced as an article of faith, 
 
CHAPTER XI. 
 
 MORMONISM IN ENGLAND :— PREPARING TO EMIGRATE. 
 
 A Blissful State of Ignorance — The Opinions of Monsieur Petitpierre — Strong 
 Arguments — How He Became an Apostate — "He Shall Rule over Her" — The 
 Nobler Sex — How Women were Sufficiently Honored — Looking Anxiously 
 for a Chang:; — ■'Establishing a Mormon Paper — Denouncing the Gentiles — 
 Terrible Expectations — Hastening to Zion — A Journey of Many Days — The 
 Swiss Pilgrims — Death by the Way — Disobeying Counsel — The "Judg- 
 ments ',' of the Lord — The Love of Many Waxes Cold — The President of the 
 London Conference — Distinguished Apostates — Strange News from Zion — 
 An "Object of Interest" — Great Success of Mormonism in Britain — How 
 Saints were Re-baptized^Poor Elder Marsden ! — The Emigration Season — 
 My Little Daughter Minnie — Saintly Treatment — A Visit from Mary Burton 
 — How Love Affairs Progressed — Pacifying a Lover — The Meaning of the 
 Word "Patience." 
 
 IT was fortunate for the Swiss Mission that the new con- 
 verts in general could not read any language but their 
 own, and thus were ignorant of the deceptions which the 
 American Elders had practiced upon the people. 
 
 Monsieur Petitpierre, the Protestant minister, who thought 
 that the Revelation ought to be " prayerfully considered," was 
 the only one who understood English, and his knowledge was 
 very limited. His wife did not at all coincide with him about 
 the prayerful consideration of Polygamy ; she disposed of the 
 subject without any prayer at all, and it is to be regretted that 
 in this respect the whole body of the Mormon women did not 
 follow her example. 
 
 What arguments she used I do not know ; but that they 
 were very much to the point no one can doubt, for they ban- 
 ished for ever all thoughts of Polygamy from her husband's 
 
A LITTLE ISHMAEL. I55 
 
 mind. It was said among the Saints that she was very ener- 
 getic in her private discussions with her husband. But how- 
 ever this might be, it is certain that Monsieur Petitpierre 
 resisted as long as he could, for the revelation quite fascinated 
 the childless old man, and it is possible that he might have 
 held fast to the faith; but, unfortunately, just then certain 
 documents and publications of the Apostles, and a very large 
 amount of evidence respecting them and their doings, 
 attracted his attention. He was in the main a good and 
 truthful man, although of small mental calibre, and the 
 deceptions and contradictions which he discovered quite dis- 
 gusted him. His wife's strong personal arguments gave the 
 finishing blow to his faith, and the spell was broken. The 
 vision of a modern Hagar and a little Ishmael vanished from 
 his mind ; he apostatised — and Mr. Stenhouse lost the services 
 of a very useful translator. 
 
 When I heard that he had left the Church, how I wished 
 that I could have followed in his footsteps. But apostasy 
 from Mormonism is only possible to two classes — the young 
 disciple, who has embraced the faith more from enthusiasm 
 than from conviction, whose experience is limited, and the 
 old disciple who has entirely outgrown it, and has become dis- 
 gusted with it all. 
 
 I was neither of these. My faith was too firmly grounded 
 to admit of my giving it up. Though I hated Polygamy, I 
 did not dare to question the divinity of its origin. I only 
 pitied myself and my sex for the burden which God had seen 
 fit to place upon us. I never for a moment supposed that 
 any man would have been so wicked as to fabricate a " Reve- 
 lation," or so blasphemous as to palm it off in the name of 
 the Lord. 
 
 Oh yes, I hated Polygamy in my heart. And my efforts in 
 teaching it only increased my hatred ; for when I was gravely 
 told by the Elders that woman had been cursed in the Gar- 
 den of Eden, and that Polygamy was one of the results of 
 that curse — " her desire shall be unto her husband, and he 
 shall rule over her\" — I must confess that my heart within me 
 
1 56 MY HUSBANDS WCJRK,^AND MINE. 
 
 was rebellious. From my earliest chiidhdo'd I had thought of 
 God as a father and a friend, to whom I might go and tell all 
 my griefs and cares ; but now He was presented to me as a 
 hard taskmaster, not as a father or a friend. 
 
 I met with much kindness, but I did not meet with much 
 sympathy from the brethren. They could not understand 
 that opposition to Polygamy was anything else than selfish- 
 ness on the part of the sisters ; they did not comprehend the 
 feeUngs of a woman's heart--— its craving for some object 
 upon which to devote its whole wealth of love. They were 
 taught that theirs was a nobler position than that of the 
 sisters, and that women might consider themselves sufficiently 
 honored in being allowed to become the mothers of their chil- 
 dren and to help in building up their " kingdom." 
 
 Of my Missionary work in Switzerland subsequent to the 
 mtroduction of Polygamy I will say but little, except that it 
 was too successful. The same sorrow and indignation which 
 Madame Baliff had so forcibly expressed, were shown by 
 almost every new convert, and I had to bear the blame of 
 teaching such a doctrine. The sisters became unhappy, and 
 wished that they had died in ignorance of Mormonism; and I 
 felt humbled to the dust to think that I should be the inno- 
 cent cause of so much misery to others. I looked anxiously 
 for a change, but the only change which seemed probable was 
 that we might be permitted to emigrate to Utah, and there 
 was no comfort for me in that prospect. 
 
 We remained in Switzerland until the close of the year 
 1854, and through the unremitting efforts of my husband, 
 Mormonism was introduced into six cantons of the Confed- 
 eration. Monsieur Baliff became an indefatigable Missionary, 
 as was also Governor Stoudeman ; and to their liberality and 
 zeal Mr. Stenhouse was greatly indebted. With the aid of 
 Monsieur Baliff, he established in Geneva a monthly periodi- 
 cal in the French language, for the edification of the Saints, 
 beside a volume in reply to the attacks of the clergy, and 
 many minor effusions. 
 
 At that time there was great excitement among the Saints 
 
SAINTS, AND THEIR SACRIFICE. 1 57 
 
 in Utah. Brigham Young and his Apostles were denouncing 
 the Gentiles in the most unmeasured language. As I write 
 a volume of sermons delivered at that time is before me, and 
 I really can hardly credit that so much ridiculous nonsense, 
 bad grammar, and blasphemy, could ever have been uttered 
 in a public place of worship ; — yet it was so. The Saints 
 were told that in these last times all the Vials of the Wrath of 
 God were about to be poured upon the earth ; wars and deso- 
 lations, anarchy and persecution, fire, pestilence, and unheard 
 of horrors, were to desolate all the world, until men should 
 call upon the rocks to hide them, and in the bitterness of 
 their souls curse the day in which they were born ; death was 
 to be sought for, but not found. Believing, as they did, that 
 all this was true, it is no wonder that the Saints in Europe 
 were alarmed, and became anxious to emigrate to Utah, where 
 they were told they would be safe. A seven years' famine 
 was said to be at the door, when a sack of wheat should be 
 sold for a sack of gold, and Gentile Kings and Princes were 
 to come and crouch to the Saints for a morsel of bread. The 
 very women in Zion were counselled to sell the ribbons from 
 their bonnets, to buy flour with the proceeds, and to hide it 
 away against the day of wrath. 
 
 The brethren and sisters in Switzerland who could dispose 
 of their property hastened to " flee to Zion." Some did so at 
 a ruinous sacrifice. One gentleman — a Monsieur Robella — I 
 knew, who was part proprietor of a newspaper and printing 
 establishment In a very short time it would have been 
 entirely in his own hands ; but he sold out at a great loss, 
 dreading that the storm might overtake him before he reached 
 the " Chambers of the Lord in the Mountains," as the Elders 
 called Salt Lake City. 
 
 The journey from Europe to Utah at that time occupied 
 six or eight months ; it was a very tedious pilgrimage. My 
 Swiss friends had first to travel to Liverpool ; thence by sail- 
 ing vessel to New Orleans ; by steamer up the Mississippi as 
 far as St. Louis ; up the Missouri to the frontiers ; and then 
 across the Plains by ox-teams. Much of this distance had to 
 
158 THE PILGRIMS FROM SWITZERLAND. 
 
 be travelled during the worst part of the year. They left 
 their homes while the Jura Mountains were still draped in 
 snow, and those who escaped the ravages of cholera and the 
 perils of the way, reached their destination just as the frosts 
 of winter were beginning to whiten the hoary heads of the 
 hills which stand about Zion. 
 
 All the Swiss pilgrims travelled together until they arrived 
 at St. Louis ; there they separated, one party going up the 
 river, and the other making the journey overland. The 
 cholera attacked the latter party and cut off the greater num- 
 ber of them, and their bones now whiten the prairie. 
 
 The news of their death soon arrived in Switzerland, and 
 the people at Lausanne were exasperated against the Mormon 
 Missionaries, and when my husband visited that place he 
 found it prudent not to remain long. At the same time those 
 of the Saints whose relations had perished in the emigration 
 were pained to hear that it was because they "had not obeyed 
 counsel," and gone up the river with the other party, that they 
 fell by the way. And, as if in mockery of this statement, the 
 next news that we received was that a Missouri steamer, on 
 board of which were many Mormon Missionaries — all most 
 obedient to counsel — had been blown to atoms. Many of the 
 Saints began to consider these things, and their love waxed 
 cold. / 
 
 Through all this our position was anything but pleasant, 
 and my husband applied for permission to be released from 
 the Presidency of the Swiss and Italian Missions, in order 
 that he might "gather to Zion." His request was granted; 
 and in the autumn of 1854, we bade a final adieu to Switzer- 
 land. 
 
 We might now be said to have begun our journey to Zion, 
 although we tarried long by the way, and several years 
 elapsed before we reached our destination. 
 
 When we arrived in London we obtained apartments in the 
 house of the President of the London Conference, and there 
 I had opportunities of observing the effects of the system 
 upon the English Saints. Elder Marsden, the President, was 
 
WHISPEIflNGS OF FEARFUL DEEDS. . 159 
 
 a thorough Mormon, and a man who was very highly thought 
 of. He had been acquainted with all the Apostles and High- 
 priests who had resided in Liverpool — the great rendezvous of 
 the Saints in England ; had been President pf the Confer- 
 ence there, and now occupied the highest position of the 
 European mission. He was a pleasant, intelligent man, who 
 in his day had done much to build up the Church ; but like 
 his two predecessors, John Banks and Thomas Margetts, he 
 also apostatised from the Mormonism of later years. At the 
 time, however, of which I speak, he was considered to be of 
 good standing am^ng the Saints. 
 
 Up to this time I had never seriously doubted my religion, 
 and I probably never should have done so had it not been for 
 the introduction of Polygamy. But what I saw in London at 
 that time sadly shook my faith, and the stories which I heard 
 from Utah quite frightened me. Nothing, of course, was 
 openly said, and at iirst I disbelieved every evil report, until 
 at last it was- impossible for me altogether to reject what was 
 told me. The testimony of an Apostate or of a Gentile would 
 have been disrnissed with contempt ; but when we saw letters 
 from mothers to their children, and husbands to their wives — 
 all people of unquestioned faith, setting forth _ the troubled 
 state of men's minds in Utah, expressing fears for their own 
 safety, and hinting at "cutting off" the transgressor, and the 
 doings of " Avenging Angels," we could not cast them aside 
 with contempt. My views of the glories of Zion were chang- 
 ing ; — henceforth I was never firm in the faith — I felt that 
 there was something wrong. 
 
 Perhaps the reader may think that now I might have left 
 the Church, and thus have avoided all those troubles which 
 awaited me in Utah. But let him remember that, although 
 my faith was shaken, it was not wholly destroyed. All that I 
 clung to on earth — my husband, whom I truly loved, and my 
 darling children — were part and parcel of Mormonism. I 
 could not tear myself from them, and isolate my soul from all 
 that made life worth having. 
 
 My unsettled state of mind, however, did not long remain 
 
l60 .THE DOINGS OF THE LONDON CONFERENCE. 
 
 a secret. It was spoken of among the Saints, and I became 
 an , object of interest. The Pastor over the London and 
 adjoining Conferences was the son of one of the chief Apos- 
 tles in Utah — a young man, whose good nature was far better 
 than his religion. He visited us very frequently, and used to 
 bring with him the distinguished American Elders who might 
 be visiting the metropolis. I have no doubt that they were 
 sincere in their desire to do me good, but it was not kind 
 attentions that I then needed, it was the removal of the cause 
 of my sorrows. 
 
 They tried to persuade me that it was all "the work of the 
 Lord ;" but I could not see it in that light, and very often in 
 reply to their consolations I said very hard things of Poly- 
 gamy and the leaders of the Church, whose conduct I consid- 
 ered sinful. And in this I did not stand alone, for I soon 
 found that the President of the Conference — Elder Marsden 
 — had been in the same position for years, and his wife was 
 "quite through" with Mormonism. In fact, so great had been 
 the distrust occasioned by Pblygamy, that in the report end- 
 ing June 30th, 1853, it was stated that from the whole British 
 Church — which then numbered very nearly thirty-one thous- 
 and souls — seventeen hundred and seventy-six had been ex- 
 communicated for apostasy ! 
 
 Of those who remained faithful I cannot give a mudh more 
 cheering account. The Elders who visited President Mars- 
 den made as damaging reports of the condition of the Saints 
 as their worst enemies could desire. All that my young 
 friend, Mary Burton, had told me did not equal the truth of 
 what I saw for myself. No one had any conildence now in 
 what the Elders said ; — how could they be trusted after so 
 many years of deception 1 
 
 The Elders who visited me and reasoned with me abou<t my 
 want of faith, tried to persuade me to be baptized again. 
 Among the Mormons it is the privilege of the faithful to be 
 baptized over and over again, as often as may be needed, for 
 the remission of their sins, which are thus washed away, and 
 the pe^tent is enabled to start afresh. At that time of fear- 
 
I AM BAPTIZED 'AGAIN. l6l 
 
 ful excitement in Utah, called by the Mormons " The Refor- 
 mation," when people were being exhorted under terrible pen- 
 alties to confess their sins, many were so frightened that they 
 acknowledged themselves guilty of crimes of which they had 
 never dreamed, while at the same time many horrible and 
 detestable sins were brought to light. Brigham and the lead- 
 ers found that they were confessing too much — the sinners 
 were far more numerous than the godly. Brigham, with his 
 usual craft, soon found a way of escape ; the people were told 
 to be baptized again, as then, their sins being washed away, 
 they could truly sa/they were not guilty of such crimes of 
 which they might be accused. 
 
 I was not convinced, and did not see that I had anything 
 to repent of, but I was quite willing to be re-baptized if it was 
 thought proper. At the same time I stipulated that the Pres- 
 ident of the Conference — Elder Marsden — should be baptized 
 with me. I felt that if I required re-baptizing, how much 
 more necessary was it for Elder Marsden to have his sins 
 washed away also. I partly believed in the fearful stories 
 that I had heard from Zion, but it was he who had shown 
 them to me. The Pastor of the Conference gave no sign that 
 he suspected my meaning in wishing Elder Marsden to be 
 baptized at the same time as I was, though I believe he must 
 have formed a pretty shrewd guess. And so we two went 
 down into the water, but I am afraid that little of our sins 
 was washed away. Not 'long after. President Marsden apos- 
 tatised, and my heart remained as hard as ever. At least I 
 was frequently told so. 
 
 Poor Elder Marsden! He was branded with the most 
 opprobrious titles which Mormon ingenuity or malice could 
 fling against him : — and yet I know of many men — not one 
 nor two — associated most intimately with Brigham Young, 
 to-day, whose faith is not a whit stronger than that apostate's, 
 who serve the Prophet because it is their interest to do so, 
 biit'who in their hearts ho more believe in his high preten- 
 sions than did James Marsden, the President of the London 
 Conference. 
 
l62 "our little MINNIE." 
 
 Meanwhile, the season for emigration had again arrived, 
 and we were directed to hold ourselves in readiness to start. 
 Although by no means unexpected, this " counsel " to emi- 
 grate came very painfully to me, for every step we took 
 toward Utah seemed to bring me nearer to the realisation of 
 my worst apprehensions. I had lost my affection for Mor- 
 monism, and my enthusiasm had now quite melted away. 
 But to refuse to go was altogether out of the question. 
 
 Two little ones had been added to our family in Geneva, 
 and a fourth was born in London, the Christmas day after our 
 return from the Continent. The foggy atmosphere of the 
 metropolis did not agree with them at all — accustomed, as 
 they had been, to the pure and bracing air of Switzerland — 
 and I soon had serious illness in my family. My second 
 little girl, Minnie, was so sick that we almost despaired of her 
 life, and the others required constant attention, while the 
 little baby boy only a few weeks old, was seldom out of my 
 arms. Just then -it was, when so very awkwardly situated, 
 that the notification came for us to set our faces Zionwar4 
 
 They chided us for our want of faith, because we did not 
 take our poor little sick child from her bed at the risk of life ; 
 but I thank God now that nature was stronger than our fanat- 
 icism, and that our little girl was spared to grow up a blessing 
 of which we shall ever be proud. 
 
 One day. President Marsden came to me confidentially and 
 told me that the brethren were determined that I should leave 
 England, and had counted upon my yielding in a moment of 
 despair. My husband was to be counselled to go without me 
 to Utah, if I persisted in my refusal. After he had left 
 London, Elder Marsden was to give me notice to leave his 
 house ; and left destitute, and entirely among strangers, it was 
 thought that I should be only too glad to follow. 
 
 I cannot tell how indignant I was ; I could not find words 
 sufficiently contemptuous to express what I felt, but I re- 
 proached Elder Marsden with cowardice for agreeing to such 
 an inhuman proposition, and I declared that I would not risk 
 the life of my child if an eternity of suffering awaited me. 
 
NOT QUITE A SLAVE. I63 
 
 My husband was absent when this took place ; but when 
 he returned he approved of what I had done, and Elder 
 Marsden was consequently "counselled" to send us away. 
 The doctor warned us against the danger of exposing my 
 little daughter to the cold in removing her, but we had no 
 choice, for we were obliged to leave. Those were very pain- 
 ful times. Constant watching and anxiety had undermined 
 my own health, and I fell ill. Even then, had we been left 
 alone, we might have escaped much of our trouble, but the 
 incessant meddling ^of "counsel" was a perpetual irritation, 
 and we were completely worn out with annoyance. 
 
 A pleasant apartment at the west end of the town was 
 taken for me, by the advice of the" medical man, and I was 
 removed thither with my baby. I was not equal even to the 
 task of taking care of that little thing, and had to procure the 
 assistance of a nurse ; the other children were cared for by 
 friends. All that I needed was rest and tranquility of mind, 
 and I soon began to recover strength, though far from well. 
 But this state of quietude was soon to be disturbed. Again 
 we were notified that the last emigrant ship of the season 
 was about to leave, and we must sail in her, and again we 
 were obliged to refuse. My husband telegraphed to the 
 Apostle at Liverpool that I was not well enough to travel, 
 and he was told to "bring me along, and I should get 
 better." The Apostle (!) cared nothing for individual suffering, 
 providing the ambitious plans of the priesthood in Salt Lake 
 City were carried out. But my husband, anxious though he 
 was to set out for Utah, and obedient, as he ever was to 
 "counsel," was not such a slave as they thought him, and he 
 positively refused to go. For this he was very much blamed, 
 and it was said that his own faith must be wavering. 
 
 Since my arrival in London I had several times seen my 
 young friend, Mary Burton, but some one was always present 
 at the time. She had, as she told me in her letters, very 
 greatly changed, for she had now become quite a young lady. 
 Still she retained most of her winning ways, though her 
 childish prettiness had given place to the more mature beauty 
 
1)64 MARY burton's LOVER. 
 
 of womanhood, and when I saw her I Was not surprised, that 
 she should be an object o£ attention, or that Elder Shrews- 
 bury should have felt so deeply her rejection of him. Sbe? 
 was as loving to me as ever, and when she found that, we 
 could not have one of our old quiet chats together, on account 
 of the people who were present, she promised to call on me 
 some afternoon when we should be quite alone. 
 
 Before she came, however, I had a visit from another, per- 
 son, whom I little expected to see. This was no other than. 
 Elder Shrewsbury himself, who, I had been informed, had left; 
 London some months before. This, after the usual saluta^ 
 tions, he told me was quite true ; — he had left London and 
 gone to work a& a Missionary hundreds of miles away ; trying 
 to forget his disappointment, but to no purpose. His was. 
 one of those natures which, though kind and considerate^ tq 
 e^i^ery one, are not ready to form hasty attachments, but 
 which, when once they do meet with an object upon which to, 
 lavish their affections, become devoted in friendship and 
 unchanging in love. Their affections flow more deeply than 
 those of most people. 
 
 Such was Elder Shrewsbury, and such I thought he would 
 always be ; but what disposition, however good, can be relied 
 upon when influenced by religious fanaticism .■' He stood 
 before me, then, manly and upright in his. bearing, truthful and 
 honest, a man who would have scorned evasion or deceit, and 
 his every thought of Mary was replete with tenderness and 
 love. And yet I lived to see that man again, in Utah — a^^ 
 how changed a man ! 
 
 Before we first left England I was acquainted with Eldes 
 Shrewsbury, but not very intimately. We had had one or 
 two interesting conversations together, but I remembered 
 him chiefly in connection with, Mary Bur.ton. It was about 
 her that he now came to see me ; — he wanted me to talk to her 
 and intercede with her in hist behalf. But I was no niatchi? 
 maker, and all my thoughts respecting love and marriage ha4 
 recently been anything but pleasant. I told him plainly tha,t 
 I thought Mary had done quite right in, refusing to see him. 
 
ONE OF eve's. 165 
 
 and, in fact, declining to receive the attentions of any Mor- 
 mon man. I dfd not doubt his love for her at present, I said, 
 but no one could any longer rely upon a Mormon Elder's 
 if ord. Years to come> when they had a little family growing; 
 lip around them, and when it would be too late for Mary to 
 fepient of trusting him, h© might suddenly be convinced of' 
 the necessity of obeying the Revelation, and then, what could 
 she do ? No! Even supposing that she loved him, which, I 
 said, was Very questionable, it was better that she should suf- 
 fer a disappointmrat now than have her heart wrung, with; 
 cruelty and neglect in aftfer years. 
 
 "What !" he cried, his eyes flashing with indignation ; " do 
 jrou take me for a dbg that I should treat ker so ?" 
 
 " No, no," I said, and tried to pacify him ; " I do not thinlfc 
 anything bad of you, but I look upon you as a man who is in 
 Ibve, and therefore blind. You think of nothing now but 
 Mary, and are willing to sacrifice everything, and to promise 
 anything, providing you^ can win her. But when she haa 
 become your wife, if she ever does, and you have time to cool 
 down, you'll begin to see things in another' light. You'll find 
 that she is a real ordinary woman, made of flesh and blood,, 
 like all the other daughters of Eve, and with, I daresay, quite 
 als many whims, and fancies, and perverse ways as any ot 
 tliem ; and then, whert she ceases to be 'an angel' in your eyes,, 
 ahd becomes merely a womaai^ you'll begin to assert your right 
 to think and judge for yourself, and- very probably all your 
 former devotion to your religion will return." 
 
 " Sister Stenhouse," he replied, " you d» not seem to have 
 a very high opinion of my constancy ; but I can assure youi 
 that I have given this matter my most earnest, prayerful 
 thought. My love for Mary I need not mention ; my devo- 
 tion to toy religion you' only partly kniowv While we were 
 told that Polygamy was not true, no one could be more stead- 
 fast in the faith than I was ; and when the Revelation came, I 
 looked upon it as a blight and a curse to the Church of God,; 
 and how well-founded my fears^ were you can see from this 
 terrible apostasy which has come upon us. I almost myself 
 
l66 "THE MEANING OF THAT WORD." 
 
 left the Church. Then I went to the Apostle, and I told him 
 how I was situated. I told him all about Mary, and my devo- 
 tion to her ; that I wished to win her for my wife, but that I 
 knew she would not marry me if she thought there was the 
 shadow of a chance that I should live up to the Revelation. I 
 told him that I myself should.be perfectly wretched in Poly- 
 gamy, and that it was impossible that I should love more than 
 one. The Apostle said that I was quite right in all this, t We 
 had no proof, he said, in the Bible, that Isaac had more than 
 one wife, and he was accepted by God. He counselled me 
 to do all I could to win Mary, and told me that I might truth- 
 fully promise her that I would never enter into Polygamy. 
 But Mary would not so much as listen to me — in fact, since 
 then she never would see me alone." 
 
 "I am not sure," I answered, "whether I am doing right; 
 but I don't mind saying to you that I think, from what I have 
 seen of Mary, that she does not dislike you ; but she is a sen- 
 sible girl, and does not choose to risk the happiness of her 
 whole life." 
 
 He was vexed with me for saying this. How could I sup- 
 pose that he would wreck her happiness t Was he not will- 
 ing to die if it would give her a moment's pleasure .■• And 
 much more lovers' nonsense he talked. He had met her at 
 the meetings sometimes, but she had very coldly said good- 
 morning, or evening, as the case might be ; but whenever he 
 had ventured a word more than that, she had made some 
 excuse to leave him. What he wanted me to do was to invite 
 Mary to meet him with me, and to use my influence with her 
 in his favor. I answered him very kindly, and did my best to 
 reassure him, but I told him that I never would try to influ- 
 ence the conduct or affections of any one in a matter of the 
 heart ; such things should take their own course ; and if he 
 waited patiently no doubt all would be well. 
 
 " Patience !" he said ; " Sister Stenhouse, do you think a 
 man in love knows the meaning of that word? Patience, 
 indeed 1" 
 
CHAPTER XII. 
 
 EMIGRATING TO ZION:— WE ARRIVE IN NEW YORK. 
 
 Mary 1 'irton Tells her Story — A Persevering Lover — A Long Conversation — 
 Somt "Strong Points" of the Revelation — A Trifling Circumstance — Terrible 
 Doings in Zion — How Orson Hyde became an Apostate — He Bears Witness 
 Against Joseph Smith — "Danites" and "Avenging Angels" — Murders Commit- 
 ted by "Indians I" — Emigration in the Old Times — A Journey of Nine Months 
 — How the Mormon Emigration was Managed — A Favored Apostle — How 
 tile Profits were Pocketed — On Board Ship^We Suffer Loss — How we were 
 Deceived — An Untruthful Apostle — How Poor Mr. Tennant was Robbed — 
 Brigham Young Acts his Accustomed Part — Love and Marriage at Sea — 
 Cooking Under Difficulties — " Harry and the Rats " — A Smart Lad — An An- 
 cient Scotch Sister — Working " for a Consideration " — Christmas on Board 
 Ship — Cruel Treatment of Seamen — A New Year in the New World. 
 
 THE afternoon following, Mary herself came to see me, 
 her face all flushed with excitement, and eager to tell me 
 something. 
 
 "Who do you think I've been talking to. Sister Sten- 
 house ?" she exclaimed, " You'd never guess." 
 
 " I don't think there's much need for guessing," I said,. 
 "Your face betrays the secret, Mary." 
 
 " Well," she said, "perhaps it does, but you wouldn't wonder 
 at it, if you only knew how very anxious I have been. All this 
 time I have kept my word, and I did not see him or speak to 
 him once, except at meetings, and not much then, and I have 
 been very unhappy. This afternoon I came round about an 
 hour ago to see, you, and there on the step was Elder Shrews- 
 bury. He said he was here yesterday, and was just going to 
 call on you again, and then he asked me to go a little way with 
 II 
 
i68 A lover's eloquence. 
 
 him, as he had something very important to say to me. At 
 first I refused to go, but he wouldn't listen to it for a moment. 
 So I went with him, and we have been talking ever since ; or 
 rather he has been talking, and I have been listening to him. 
 I can't tell you, Sister Stenhouse, all he said — ^you can guess 
 better than I can tell you. But I'm afraid I shall not be able 
 to keep my resolution much longer, for when we came back to 
 the door again he said he wouldn't come in to see you now, and 
 when he begged me to let him call at Mrs. Elsworth's to-mor- 
 row night, I did not feel it in my heart to refuse him ; — was it 
 very wrong of me to do so ?" 
 
 Said I — '- I'm afraid, Mary, my opinion would not matter 
 much either way ; Elder Shrewsbury's eloquence is the music 
 which you like best to listen to." 
 
 She blushed, and came and sat down beside me, and we 
 talked together until the sun went down and my little room 
 was quite dark. I told her of my troubles in Switzerland and 
 of the miserable effects of introducing Polygamy there ; and 
 she in return told me all her love affairs with Elder Shrews- 
 bury and of her resolution not to listen to him unless he sol- 
 emnly promised never to have anything to do with the hated 
 Revelation. Her faith in Mormonism itself had, as I expected, 
 been very severely shaken, and I think that had it not been 
 for my efforts to re-assure her, she would have left the Church 
 at that time. Would, to God, she had. 
 
 After tea, she said — " Have you a copy of the Revelation 
 here. Sister Stenhouse .' I want to show you some strong 
 points in it which I think will astonish you. I learned all 
 about it from Elder Shrewsbury that night when he came td 
 see me, and it was that that disgusted me with the whole 
 affair." We searched through my trunk but could not find 
 the document, and I told her that I had not patience to read 
 it quite through when it was given to me, and that since 
 then I was not sure that I had even seen it. " Never, 
 mind," she said, " I'll bring it with me when I come again." 
 
 How often have 1 thought since how much depended upon 
 that trifling circumstance. Had we then together read over 
 
WHISPERINGS OF SCANDAL. 1 69 
 
 the Revelation and noticed the " strong points," of which she 
 spoke, I believe my eyes would have been opened and I never 
 should have submitted to the misery which I afterwards en- 
 dured in Utah. 
 
 By and by she asked me whether I had heard anything of the 
 terrible doings out in Zion, and I, in return, asked her whai- 
 doings she alluded to. 
 
 " Well," she said, " I hardly like to tell you, if you have 
 heard nothing about the matter, for I'm not quite sure 
 whether it all is true ; but we have had some strange reports 
 floating about here, just like the reports of Polygamy, before 
 it was acknowledged. It is said that in the time of Joseph 
 Smith a band of men was organised who put to death any one 
 who was troublesome to the Church or offended the Elders. 
 Some people say that it was one or perhaps more of this band 
 who fired at Governor Boggs, of Missouri, and who killed 
 many other Gentiles. Dr. Avard and Sidney Rigdon are 
 said to have been mixed up in the matter, and that wretched 
 man, John C. Bennett, tells a frightful story about it. But that 
 is not the worst, for Elder Shrewsbury himself told me long 
 ago that Thomas B. Marsh, the then President of the Twelve, 
 when he apostatised, took oath that the Saints had formed a 
 " Destruction Company," as he called it, for the purpose of 
 avenging themselves, and Orson Hyde, in a solemn affidavit 
 swore that all that Marsh had said was true." 
 
 " Well dear," I said, " I've heard all that before, but no doubt 
 it is all scandal." 
 
 "I'm afraid not," she replied; "for I have heard from people 
 who ought to know, that since the Saints have been in Salt 
 Lake Valley the same things have been done ; only now they 
 speak of those men as " Danites " and " Avenging Angels." 
 People say that those who are dissatisfied and want to leave 
 Zion, almost always are killed after they set out, by the Indians, 
 and they dare not say boldly who they believe those "Indians" 
 are. Then, too, one lady told me that she had heard from her 
 sister that not only were apostates killed in a mysterious way 
 by Indians or some one else, but that many people were "mis- 
 
r/O THE MORMON EMIGRATION. 
 
 sing," or else found murdered, who were only suspects of 
 being very weak in the faith. These things are horrible, and 
 sometimes I think I will never go out to Zion." 
 
 I had heard these very same stories, and told her so ; and I 
 tried to make her believe^ that they were without foundation ; 
 but I could see that what she had heard had made a great im- 
 > pression on her mind. So I turned the conversation to other 
 topics, and we talked over our plans and prospects for the 
 future. Neither of us were very hopeful — she because she 
 was undecided what course to pursue ; I because of the 
 shadow of coming sorrow which already began to darken my 
 way. We tried, however, to comfort each other; and when, 
 she left I certainly felt more assured and hopeful. 
 
 At this time I was left much alone, for my husband having 
 no business in which to employ himself was sent by the Pas- 
 tor of the London Conference to travel among the Saints •; 
 domestic comfort or the claims of a wife were never for a 
 moment thought worthy of consideration. Then it was that. 
 I felt how lonely one may be in the midst of that Great City. 
 
 Towards the end of the year 1855, it was determined that a 
 company of Mormon emigrants, numbering several hundreds, 
 should leave Liverpool en route for Salt Lake City ; and for 
 that purpose a vessel was chartered early in November. This 
 was not the ordinary season for emigration, but there were 
 then in England numbers of the Saints, anxious to go to Zion, 
 but too poor to pay their passage all the way. It was thought 
 that when they arrived in New York they would have time 
 to earn sufficient to carry them on, and it was then sup- 
 posed they could join those who came over by the ordinary 
 spring emigration. My husband and myself were counselled 
 to join these emigrants in Liverpool and proceed at once to 
 New York. 
 
 I was now strong enough to travel, and though far from well, 
 and the prospect of such a journey in the middle of winter, was 
 anything but cheering. My husband, however, who was anx- 
 ious to go, smoothed away every difficulty, and it was resolved 
 that this time we should " obey " counseL 
 
JOURNEYING ZIONWARD, — ^A LONG, LONG WAY. 171 
 
 The reader may perhaps think me somewhat unreasonable 
 in regarding such a journey as more than an ordinary an- 
 noyance; but he should remember that I am speaking 
 of eighteen years ago. The passage across the Atlantic 
 Ocean in mid-winter is anything but inviting even under 
 the best of circumstances, but in the old days of sailing-ves- 
 sels it was infinitely worse. The ocean-steamers now make the 
 passage in from ten to fourteen days ; but then a month was con- 
 sidered a good, quick passage for a sailing boat. Then too the 
 modern accommodations — even for steerage passengers — bear 
 no comparison with the frightful disorder and utter lack of com- 
 fort experienced in former times. All this ought to be taken 
 inio consideration when speaking of the early Mormon emi- 
 gnmts and the sacrifices which that people then made 
 for their faith. There was the same difference between them 
 and the snug little party which a year ago crossed the ocean 
 under the guidance of the councillor Apostle G. A. Smith, and 
 the childless versifier Eliza R. Snow, as there was between 
 St. Paul braving the perils of shipwreck with the tempestuous 
 Euroclydon, and the modern orthodox missionary with well- 
 fiUed purse and comfortable outfit on board the magnificent 
 steamers of the Mediterranean. 
 
 The Mormon emigration has always been a well-managed 
 business ; and, forming a' united body, under the guidance of 
 inspired leaders, the Mormons have never given so much trouble 
 as ordinary passengers. At the time of which I speak, the emi- 
 gration was on a much larger scale than at present ; although 
 even now several thousand converts arrive every summer in 
 New York on their way to Utah. Now the journey from 
 Liverpool to Salt Lake City is accomplished easily in less 
 than a month ; — then it required nine. The Saints used then 
 to speak of Zion as being " a thousand miles from every- 
 where ;" and when they went East they used to talk of " going 
 to the States" as if they belonged to another nation: — but 
 now the Great Pacific Railway has knit together the utmost 
 limits of this vast country, and a journey to the Far West is 
 only a pleasant summer tour. 
 
1/2 HOW WE BEGAN OUR TRAVELS. 
 
 Every presiding Elder in Britain is a Mormon Emigration- 
 Agent:— unpaid, but no less effective. It is a part of his mis- 
 sion. The Elder presiding over " the office " at Liverpool^ 
 generally some favored Apostle — pockets all the profits of the 
 transaction, and has but little trouble in return. The Saints 
 are notified through the Star of the day when the vessel will 
 sail, and are told to forward their emigration-money, or at 
 least a portion of it ; — as the Church risks nothing. The 
 Apostle, being thus secured by the deposits, arranges with the 
 shipping agent for the passage of a specified number of 
 persons, and receives a very nice commission upon each emi- 
 grant — which commission is one of the chief perquisites of 
 his office. 
 
 The Mormons in London were very kind to us before we 
 left and did all they could to help us in preparing for our 
 journey. A kinder people than the Saints in Europe could no- 
 where be found. My husband had been directed to take 
 charge of the emigrants in the transit from London to Liver- 
 pool, and consequently I received no assistance from him. It 
 seemed to me a very cruel arrangement for the Elders to take 
 away from me and my helpless little ones the very person to 
 whom we ought naturally to have turned for protection; 
 but what were the feelings of a weak woman when they 
 came in conflict with the " counsel " of inspired Apostles ? 
 
 We arrived in Liverpool the same evening, and there. my 
 husband was relieved of the charge of the company, and some 
 of the brethren were appointed to see that the baggage was 
 safely transferred from the railway to the ship. Early 
 the next morning we went on board, and it was not long 
 before we began to experience the pleasures (i") of an emi- 
 grant life. 
 
 Before we set out for Liverpool, I had been told that on 
 board ship I should be able to obtain all the help that I might 
 desire ; and anxious to provide for the comfort of the children, 
 I engaged the services of two young girls to look after them 
 and assist me generally. This was an imprudent step, as I 
 afterwards found to my cost ; but at the time I thought that 
 
FIRST EXPERIENCES ON BOARD SHIP. 1 73 
 
 I had made a very sensible arrangement. Help bemg se- 
 cured, my next thought was to get our berths fixed, so that all 
 might be ready before the rolling of the ship began. My first 
 enquiries were for our bedding ; but it was no where to be 
 found. Now this was very annoying, for we were all tired and 
 the children, poor things, were fidgetty ; and anticipating a 
 long and unpleasantt voyage I wanted to have everything in 
 readiness. Besides which I had made special preparations in 
 the shape of many additional comforts which I knew on board 
 ship would be absolutely necessary, and had even sold my 
 watch and jewelr)f for that purpose. 
 
 I enquired of the proper authorities, but could obtain no 
 information, and nothing remained but for me to wait until the 
 Apostle came on board to bid a final adieu to the emigrants. 
 I felt this annoyance all the more as I considered that we had 
 no right to expect such mismanagement. We would natur- 
 ally have preferred to make our own arrangements and to 
 go alone, had we been permitted to do so ; but we had, over 
 and over again, been instructed not to go by any other vessel 
 but that chartered by the Apostle Richards, that so we 
 might escape the perils which were sure to overtake the Gen- 
 tiles. Imagine our disgust when we found that as there 
 were not enough of the Saints to occupy the whole ship, the 
 lower deck was filled with Irish emigrants of the most barbar- 
 ous type, and that their luggage and ours had been thrown 
 together indiscriminately into the hold. Most of the Mormon 
 emigrants recovered their property when they arrived at New 
 York, but as for our own, personally, we never saw it 
 again, and all the voyage through we were left utterly desti- 
 tute. 
 
 The Apostle Richards and Pastor Kimball came on board 
 before the vessel sailed and I told them all about it. We 
 could not possibly put to sea in that condition, I said, and I 
 wanted to leave the ship. He promised that the things should 
 be looked after, and assured me that on no account should we 
 be permitted to sail without being properly provided fon I 
 not only trusted their word as gentlemen but I believed in 
 
1/4 HOW MR. TENANT .LOST HIS MONEY. 
 
 them as favored servants of God ; and when subsequently I 
 found that they had wilfully deceived me I became conscious 
 that there was as little of the true and truthful geritlepian 
 about some of the modern Apostles, as there was of the apos- 
 tle about ordinary gentlemen. 
 
 Thus in the cold, foggy days of an English November 
 we set out, bereft of the commonest necessaries, and deceived 
 by our own leaders, to begin a new life in a new world. 
 
 I would not for my own sake mention these unpleasant 
 reminiscences were it not that so many mean and cruel de- 
 ceptions — and, were it not that I do not care to use harsh 
 words, I might call downright "swindles" — had come beneath 
 my observation in connection with the Mormon emigration 
 in past years, I will mention one alone which ought not to 
 be passed by unnoticed. 
 
 In the year 1854, Brigham Young and the leading Elders 
 were most anxious to draw to Zion the converts from every 
 part of the globe ; and for this purpose the faithful were called , 
 upon to bring in freely their contributions to the Perpetual 
 Emigration Fund. To set them an example. Brother Brigr 
 ham himself stated that he would present as a free-gift his 
 own property — a valuable city house and lot, if any purchaser 
 could be found wealthy enough to purchase it. An English, - 
 gentleman named Tenant, a new convert, accepted the offer and 
 advanced the money— thirty thousand dollars — and set out for 
 .Salt Lake City, expecting there to be put in possession of the 
 property. He was one of the unfortunate Hand-Cart Emi- 
 grants, of whom I shall presently have occasion to speak more 
 fully; and he died on the plains. His wife and children, when 
 they arrived in the Valley, were told that the transaction was 
 not made with them but with Mr. Tenant, and all their efforts 
 to obtain the property, which in common justice was theirs, 
 were unavailing. At the present moment Mr. Tenant's wife 
 lives in miserable poverty in Salt Lake City, while there is no 
 ojje to bring the honest Prophet to account. 
 
 The vessel sailed, and we heard no more of our property. 
 Whether it ever left London, or whether some obliging 
 
MISERIES OF AN EMIGRANT SHIP, I9i 
 
 brother took charge of it on his own account, I cannot say, 
 but I could form a pretty good guess. I frequently see that 
 man in Salt Lake City, and I aways think of my bedding 
 when I see him. Nothing, however, remained but for me to 
 put the best face I could upon matters. I took my wearing 
 apparel and other articles out of the trunks and put them into 
 pillow slips, and extemporised as well as I could a rough sub- 
 stitute for beds. These served for the children, and I cov- 
 ered them with my cloaks and shawls ; and for our own 
 berths and bed-covering I had only a few pieces of carpet 
 which I had put *aside for the cabin floor, together with a 
 worn-out blanket which an old lady on board was good 
 enough to lend me. 
 
 We had not been long at sea when the young sisters whom 
 I had engaged to help me, fell sick, and some of the brethren 
 were very anxious to nurse them. This appeared to be quite 
 the established order of things, for I then found that it was 
 very seldom that a Mormon emigrant ship crossed the ocean 
 without one or more marriages on board. It was, no doubt, 
 very interesting to them, but to me it was extremely incon- 
 venient, especially considering that^ my husband had now 
 taken to his berth, which he did not leave during the remain- 
 der of the voyage, and myself and the children were not 
 much better off. 
 
 Sick as I was, I had to prepare our food, and manage every- 
 thing, for in those times emigrants either took out their own 
 provisions or were allowanced in raw material, and in either 
 case had to do their own cooking. My chief difficulty was in 
 getting what I had prepared to the fire-galley, for I could nol 
 leave the children, and I was afraid to venture myself upon 
 deck. So I got any of the brethren who chanced to be pass- 
 ing to take it up, and of course they were willing to oblige 
 me ; but the galley was so crowded — every one having his or 
 her own interests to attend to — that I very rarely, if ever, had 
 my provisions decently cooked, and on more than one occa-^ 
 sion I never saw them again. This was an inconvenience 
 which modern emigrants do not suffer at the present day. 
 
i/S "harry and the rats." 
 
 Unsuccessful with the young sisters, I thought I would try 
 if I could not get one of the brethren to help me, and fortune 
 at first appeared to favor me. There was on board a young 
 man — Harry, they called him, — and he was so situated that 
 I found it easy to open a negotiation with him. He had been 
 a saddler's apprentice in a country town in England, and hav- 
 ing listened to some itinerant preacher, had been converted, 
 joined the Church, and begun to think for himself. So hear- 
 ing that terrible judgments were quickly coming upon the Old 
 World, he resolved to flee to the New, and in his hurry to get 
 there he forgot to inform his master that he was about to 
 leave. This accounted for his being so badly provided for. 
 
 Now, Harry had those two great blessings — a splendid 
 appetite and unimpeachable powers of digestion. I will not 
 say that he enjoyed these two blessings, for that he did not, 
 on account of lacking a third blessing, namely, the where- 
 withal to make the first two blessings a pleasure, and not an 
 inconvenience. The ship's allowance was altogether insuffi- 
 cient for him, and he, therefore, gladly engaged to do what 
 few things I required upon condition that I should add a little 
 to his own private commissariat. 
 
 Harry was a smart lad and at first very useful, and he soon 
 convinced me that he had told the truth when he said that 
 he had not had enough to eat ever since he came on board — 
 it seemed to me very questionable whether he ever had 
 before. He had, however, nothing to complain of in that 
 respect while in our employment, for although the children 
 were able to eat whenever we had anything fit for them, my 
 husband and myself could seldom touch our rations, and as 
 everything that was not used fell to Harry's share, he fared 
 pretty well. 
 
 Harry was not the lad to neglect his own interests, and as 
 our interests appeared just then to be his also, matters worked 
 very harmoniously. Our bread was never now brought back 
 to us half raw or burnt to a cinder. It must be properly 
 cooked for our eating or it would not do for Harry's, and as 
 for it being lost or delayed on its way to or from the galley 
 
AN ANCIENT SCOTTISH SISTER. I77 
 
 that was, of course, quite out of the question. But the 
 strangest thing of all connected with Harry was that imme- 
 diately after his coming we were incessantly annoyed by the 
 rats. I had brought for the children's use a small supply of 
 preserves and other little delicacies ; but these mysteriously 
 disappeared with alarming rapidity, and whenever I saved any 
 trifle for the children to eat between meals, that also was gone 
 when it was wanted, and in every instance Harry suggested 
 that it was " the rats," though I never could find any traces 
 of those interesting animals. I was sorry to part with Harry, 
 for he used to tell funny stories to the children, and amused 
 them a great deal, but " the rats " and Harry were so closely 
 associated in my mind that I thought if Harry left, the rats 
 might perhaps also cease their visits. So Harry went, and I 
 was once more left alone to do the best I could. 
 
 The weather was very cold, and though we wore our cloth- 
 ing day and night, we felt its severity very much. The rig- 
 ging of the ship was hung with icicles, and without fire or 
 warmth of any sort, it is no wonder that we all were soon 
 hardly able to move from cold and sickness. I have heard 
 emigrants who came over in steam-vessels say that even in 
 mid-winter the heat in their berths was almost unendurable ; 
 but in a sailing-vessel there were, of course, no engine fires 
 to warm the ship, and the passengers suffered accordingly. 
 
 In the midst of my trouble I was told of an ancient Scotch 
 sister — a maiden lady, sharp and shrewd, — who, like the miser 
 in Scott's " Fortunes of Nigel," was willing to help us " for a 
 consideration." So we talked the matter over, and it was 
 agreed that she should give me her services for the remain- 
 der of the voyage ; and the " consideration " was to be two 
 pounds English. Small as was our stock of money, and much 
 as I knew we should need it upon our arrival, I felt that I 
 could do no better than engage her. There was no saying 
 upon whom she might chance to set her maiden fancy, but 
 there was not the remotest chance of any of the brethren falling 
 in love with her ; so I considered her a safe investment, and, 
 besides, I must have somebody — there was no alternative. 
 
J/S CHRISTMAS AT SEA — DISAPPOINTED HOPES. 
 
 It was now Christmas time — a season which in England 
 ■was always sacred to joyous memories and festivities ; but 
 to us, exiles and wanderers, seeking a land of which we knew 
 nothing, and which to us was a new and untried world, it was 
 far from being a happy time. In the midst of the wild, dreary 
 ocean there was nothing to recall the pleasant reminiscences 
 of the past, or to inspire us with hope and courage as we 
 thought of the future. 
 
 The Captain told us that we mig'ht prepare to eat our 
 Christmas dinner in New York ; but he was mistaken. I can 
 form no opinion of the captain as a seaman, but as a man I 
 detested him for his cruel treatment of two unfortunate men 
 who were under him. These men — one a Spaniard, and th$ 
 other a Hungarian — had agreed to work out their passage tp 
 New York, but they were quite unfit for sea life. One of them 
 when he refused or was unable to go up into the shrouds, 
 was dragged aloft by main force, and there they tied him, 
 and there they kept him until he was nearly frozen to death, 
 On another occasion they beat both of these men with spikes, 
 and I feared they would kill them, and their cries and groan? 
 right above my head were most painful to listen to. In fact, 
 so badly were they treated that on their arrival they had to 
 be carried to the hospital Such was the "discipline" on 
 board that ship. 
 
 The Captain was mistaken in his calculations. We did not 
 eat our Christmas dinner in New York, as he had promised, 
 A storm came on, which compelled us to stand out to sea 
 again, and then a dead calm followed, and it was not until 
 New Year's eve that we set foot upon the shore of the New 
 World. 
 
 We were now three thousand miles nearer to Zion ; but my 
 heart misgave me as I thought of the future, and the first 
 "New Year's day that I spent in the United States was any- 
 thing but a day of pleasure to me. 
 
CHAPTER XIII. 
 
 LIFE IN NEW YOpK :— CONDUCTING A MORMON PAPER. 
 
 An Introduction to a New World — The New York Saints— How Certain Eldefs- 
 Disappeared — An Uncomfortable Week — Left all Alone— Love Waxing Cold 
 — Mental Slavery— The School-House at Williamsburgh— Miserable Condi- 
 tion of the Emigrants— Suffering for Their Faith— The Apostle Taylor Lee. 
 tures the Saints— Some Smart " Counsel "—Buying Shovels— An Unprofit- 
 able Speculation— The "Mean Yankee Gentiles "—Days and Nights of Trial 
 —How the •• Mormon " was Edited— A Rather Small Salary— The Doings of 
 High-Priests and " Seventies "—An Amiable Connecticut Girl— Half-a-dozen 
 Wives— Permission from Brigham Young— Certain Elders who had "Disease 
 of the ?Ieart"— The Course of True Love— A Young Widow Who Looked 
 Well in Weeds— Arranging the Affairs of the Heart— The True Source of 
 Modern Revelations. 
 
 VERY cold, and dark, and dreary, were the first days which 
 we spent in the New World. That faith which once had 
 led me to hope, and believe, and endure all things, was now 
 powerless to nerve me to any new course of action for my 
 religion's sake ; for the dark shadow of Polygamy had come 
 across my way ; hope had fled, and my love, with the love of 
 many other faithful Saints, had waxed cold. 
 
 To my husband and children I was, of course, devotedly 
 attached, and was willing to combat any difficulty or endure 
 any trial with them, or for their sake ; and it was not long 
 before my constancy was put to the test. 
 
 The Mormon emigrants have always a Captain and two 
 "Counsellors" to every company. The Captain on board the 
 Emerald Isle — the vessel in which we came — was a returning 
 Utah Elder ; — one of his Counsellors was also a returning 
 Elder, and my husband was the other. As soon as the Mor- 
 
l80 THE BEGINNING OF A NEW LIFE. 
 
 mon Captain had come on shore, aud had reported to the 
 Apostle in charge of the New York Saints, he left to visit his 
 friends. The Utah Counsellor had a young lady in the com- 
 pany to whom he had become very much attached, and who 
 afterward became one of his wives. I was not, therefore, 
 surprised that, as soon as he could get his baggage, he also 
 should disappear ; but my husband — the other Counsellor — 
 being encumbered with a wife and family, was obliged to 
 remain, and the whole charge of seeing to the company 
 devolved upon him. 
 
 We had, therefore, to remain in Castle Gardens until the 
 whole company of emigrants was provided for ; and during all 
 the next week I, with my four children, remained in that pub- 
 lic place, sick and weary, and as destitute of bedding and 
 covering as we had been on board ship. The weather was 
 intensely cold, and, unaccustomed as we were to the severity 
 of an American winter, we suffered not a little. The other 
 unfortunate victims to faith were in the same condition, with 
 the exception that they had something to sleep on at nights, 
 while I had nothing but the bare boards for my bed since 
 we left Liverpool ; — all that I could gather together had been 
 reserved for my babes. How we lived through that journey 
 I know not, but I am certain that, could I have forseen what 
 we should have to endure, I would never have left England, 
 whatever my refusal might have cost me. 
 
 I could not refrain from contrasting my life before and 
 since I knew Mormonisml Before, I scarcely knew what suf- 
 fering was, so little had I been called upon to endure ; I never 
 knew what it was to be without money, or to want for any- 
 thing ; but now I was in a strange land, in the depth of win- 
 ter, without a home, without a pillow to rest my weary head 
 upon, and with a future before me so dark that not a single 
 ray of light gave to it the promise of hope. Could any 
 slavery be more complete than mine ? My fanaticism and 
 zeal were all gone — I had nothing to sustain me. Certainly, 
 I was still held by the fear that Mdrmonism, after all, mi^kt 
 be of God, and that all this suffering ifzta-/ii be necessary for 
 
WHAT WAS DONE AT CASTLE GARDENS. I Si 
 
 my salvation — but if at that time I had only had a friend whose 
 mind was clear from all the nonsense of Mormonism, and who 
 had felt sufficient interest in me to advise me for my good, I 
 think even then I might have freed myself from the mental 
 slavery in which I was bound. But I had no intercourse 
 with any but Mormons ; and, indeed, a wish to form Gentile 
 friendships I should then have considered a sin. 
 
 A week after our arrival, my husband found time to seek 
 for apartments for his family, and I was thankful to leave our 
 miserable quarters at Castle Gardens. 
 
 The Mormon authorities had, meanwhile, given instructions 
 to the other emigrants how to act, and they did little more 
 than this. Those who had not found work or places to go to 
 were ordered to leave the Gardens, and received permission 
 to occupy an old dilapidated school-room in Williamsburgh, 
 which had been used for preaching. I went there almost 
 daily to see them, and therefore state what I saw as an eye- 
 witness, and neither exaggerate nor misrepresent. There they 
 huddled together about one hundred and fifty men, women 
 and children. Most of the men had been respectable me- 
 chanics in their own country ; many of them I had known 
 p_ersonally and had visited in their cosy English homes ; and 
 their wives and families had been decently brought up. What 
 they must have suffered under thi^ change of circumstances I 
 leave the reader to guess. 
 
 In that miserable place they lived day and night — the poor, 
 dispirited mothers — many of them very sick — having to cook, 
 and wash, and perform all the necessary domestic duties, 
 round two small sheet-iron stoves.. It was not long before 
 the place became like a pest-house from so many being con- 
 fined in so small a place, and breathing the same fetid and 
 pestilential atmosphere, and many of the young children died 
 of an epidemic which was raging among them. 
 
 They had saved some of their ship's provisions, and that 
 was all they had to eat, and it did not last long. To me it 
 was most distressing to witness so much misery without 
 being able to render any assistance, particularly to see the 
 
l82 LECTURING TftE BRETHREN. 
 
 poor little chlHren Shivering and drying with hunger and cold, 
 while many of their mothers were in such a miserable state 
 of apathy that they paid little or no attention to them. I 
 often tried to awaken in them feelings of human sympathy, 
 but I was met with a murmur of discontent — the people, men 
 and women alike — seemed to be utterly demoralised. Nor 
 can this be a matter of wonder ; for in England the men had 
 been told thajt — while at home they could Only earn four or 
 five shillings a day, and would never be able to put by enough 
 to carry them all the way to Utah— in New York they would 
 be able to earn two-and-a-half to three, and even four dollars a 
 day — equal' to from ten to sixteen shillings English — and that 
 employers would even come on board ship' anxious to engage 
 them. Thus they had by false statements' been allured from 
 their homes and plunged into the most abject poverty. Day 
 by day they went out seeking work, but finding none, willing' 
 to do anything to provide bread for their families, but return- 
 ing nightly, unsuccessful, to their starving wives and children.; 
 
 My own resources were gone. I could do nothing. When 
 we left Castle Garden I think we only had about five dollars' 
 left, while the heavy snow which covered the ground and the 
 intense cold promised many weeks of imusual severity. 
 Needing so greatly pity myself, how I sympathised with 
 those poor sufferers, how I pitied them ! 
 
 In the midst of all this, the Apostle John Taylor learned 
 that some of these poor souls had been seen begging. So he 
 came from his comfortable boarding-house in Brooklyn, well 
 wrapped up in a handsome overcoat, and scolded these poor, 
 starving creatures, and harangued them concerning the mean- 
 ness of begging. With great swelling words he spoke of the 
 dignity of the Saints of the Most High, and told them that 
 he despised a Mormon who could fall to the level of a com- 
 mon street beggar. 
 
 Could he have heard the unspoken curses of the poor, 
 wounded hearts of those who listened to him, as they thought 
 of his brother "Apostle" in England, and of how he had 
 deceived them iand sent them into a strange country, in the 
 
THE WISDOM OF AN APOSTLE. 1 85 
 
 depth of winter, to beg, to starve, or to steal, he would have 
 learned that though the victim of a delusive 'faith may men- 
 tally submit to man-made creeds and priesthoods, in his heart 
 he will judge, not so much the words he hears as the man 
 who utters them. 
 
 The wisdom of the Apostle found out a remedy. He 
 " counselled " the men and boys to buy shovels, and go forth 
 into the streets and clean away the snow from the fronts of 
 the doors and from the side-walks, and told them that they 
 would thus get plenty of money to keep them until winter 
 was over. One el(ferly brother, who had a little money left 
 bought a stock of shovels ; but the emigrants found that 
 there were plenty of others who were as eager as they for 
 work, and who were much better acquainted with the way of 
 obtaining it. The shovel experiment was a failure, and the 
 poor old brother lost his money in the investment. 
 
 For whatever the Apostle Taylor may have contributed to 
 these unfortunate persons — whether in "counsel," money, or 
 provisions — he will doubtless have his reward ; and, for aught 
 I know, he may have been unable to give anything more than 
 counsel ; but, at the same time, my opinion of the value of 
 counsel remains unchanged. There has been no lack of 
 "counsel" or counsellors in the Mormon Church. " Counsel" 
 has been given in abundance to all, and by no means always for 
 the benefit of those who received it. It was not, however, 
 because he failed to assist them practically that the people 
 hated the Apostle Taylor, and have hated him ever since, but 
 it was for his pride and arrogance, and the way in which he 
 dared to talk to free-born Englishmen and Englishwomen 
 about the dignity of the Priesthood, and the contempt in 
 which he held them in the hour of their humiliation and dis- 
 tress — for that they hated him. 
 
 I do not, of course, wish to justify the people in begging ; 
 such conduct would have been despicable if they could have 
 found employment of any sort. But when I saw the starv- 
 ing condition of those men and their helpless families, in that 
 wretched school-house, in my heart I almost honored them for 
 12 
 
1 86 IN THE NEW WORLD. 
 
 having the courage to beg; and I thanked God that the 
 " mean Yankee Gentiles " — as the Elders taught the Saints 
 to call American citizens who did not believe in Mormonism 
 ' — were able and willing to assist them. 
 
 One of those emigrants very recently related to me some 
 of the painful circumstances through which he passed at that 
 time. He told me that he walked the streets of Williams- 
 burgh for three days and three nights without a mouthful of 
 anything to eat, or a place to lay his head ; — he could obtain 
 no work, and at length, in sheer desperation, he -^zs forced to 
 beg. The Church authorities knew well the misery of the 
 people, but took no adequate steps to alleviate it. 
 
 During the first weeks after our arrival in New York city 
 we had nothing to depend upon but the provisions which we 
 had saved from the ship's rations. I had known what it was 
 to be in a foreign country without money and without food ; 
 and on board ship I took care of our rations when they were 
 not consumed by Harry or "the rats ;" for I thought that if. I 
 did not need them — which, indeed, I sincerely hoped might 
 be the case — I could certainly find some one who would be 
 thankful for them. These rations consisted chiefly of .sugar 
 that was almost black ; very bad black tea, which when made 
 looked like dye ; the poorest kind of sea-biscuit ; and other 
 things accordingly. The provisions for the Mormon emi- 
 grants were purchased in bulk by the Church authorities, who 
 made their own profits out of them, and the Apostle at Liver- 
 pool had the benefit of all that could be saved out of them 
 during the voyage. It was commonly said among the people 
 that the sight of them alone was quite sufficient for any one 
 who was not half-starved ; and yet they had paid the price of 
 the best. 
 
 We had been in New York several weeks when one day my 
 husband called at the office of a paper called The Mormon, 
 and there met with the Apostle Taylor who conducted that 
 paper. The Apostle expressed great regret that Mr. Sten- 
 house should be without occupation at that season of the year, 
 and with a family of children upon his hands. This sympathy , 
 
APOSTOLIC LIBERALITY. I87 
 
 coming from a brother Missionary was, I thought, very tardy, 
 for my husband had then devoted over ten years of his life to 
 the cause, and his record in the Church had been untarnished. 
 The Apostle was living in an elegant house surrounded by 
 every comfort and luxury, while he knew that we had not so 
 much as a chair, or even a bed to lie upon. What had he 
 done for the Church more than my husband had done .' In- 
 deed, I firmly believe that he had not endured half as much, 
 but — he was an Apostl'e ! His unhelping sympathy appeared 
 to me a little more.than questionable. 
 
 He told my husband that he might come into the office of 
 The Mormon, and write the addresses on the wrappers, and 
 that he would give him a few dollars a week " to help things 
 along," until something better presented itself. My husband 
 thought this a disinterested action on the part of the Apostle 
 John Taylor, but my experience in Mormonism led me to be 
 distrustful and suspicious of everything that an Elder or 
 Apostle said or did. This offer, however, came when we 
 really had nothing to look to, and dared not refuse any assist- 
 ance that was offered, however small it might be. But I must 
 allow that my ideas of Apostolic liberality were very much 
 shocked when^t the end of the week Mr. Stenhouse informed 
 me that he had been allowed four dollars for his services, and 
 that out of that magnificent sum the Apostle John Taylor had 
 deducted twenty-five cents which sheer necessity had com- 
 pelled him to borrow for the week's ferriage. 
 
 The Apostle-editor had two assistants from Utah with him 
 in the " Morpion " office — the one a " Seventy," and the other 
 a " High-Priest " — terms and titles which I shall presently ex- 
 plain. A few weeks after my husband entered the office, the 
 " Seventy " who had charge of getting out the paper was al- 
 lowed to return to Zion. The High-Priest remained in the 
 Eastern States visiting alternately the various branches of the 
 Church, and doing some very zealous courting with a young 
 English girl who* lived in Williamsburgh, while his two unsus- 
 pecting wives at home in Salt Lake City were earnestly pray- 
 ing the Lord to bless him in his "mission." 
 
l88 "TROUBLED WITH HEART-DISEASE. 
 
 Whatever the Apostle may have thought of his associate, 
 he could not very well remonstrate with him, for he himself 
 was, and had been for some time, doing a good deal in that 
 line with an amiable Connecticut girl, and was only waiting 
 for special permission from Brigham Young, to add her to the. 
 half-dozen wives he already had in Utah. 
 
 There was, moreover, another High-Priest attached to that 
 oiHce, but no one seemed to understand his exact position. To 
 all appearance his principal occupation was travelling from New 
 York to Connecticut and from Connecticut back again to New 
 York. He was a very robust-looking man, but it was reported 
 that he was troubled with heart-disease, and that the purer air 
 of Connecticut was a great relief to him. This I fully believed 
 when, some time after, I discovered that the young lady en- 
 gaged to the Apostle had a charming sister, for I thought it 
 very probable that she rendered no small assistance to the 
 Connecticut air in giving relief to his diseased heart. 
 
 My husband not being at that particular time under the in- 
 fluence of " heart-disease," soon became very useful on the> 
 editorial staff. In fact, pretty well everything was left to him, 
 and not unfrequently for two or three days he saw nRthing of 
 the Apostle or either of his associates, and the whole respon- 
 sibility of getting out the paper — at the magnificent salary of 
 four dollars a week ! — rested upon him. He was told that he 
 must regard it as a mission and be prepared to act accord- 
 ingly. 
 
 In course of time, however, the visits to Connecticut came 
 to an end. The Apostle obtained Brother Brigham's permis- 
 sion to practice a little Polygamy among the Gentiles, and 
 Miss Young made him an excellent housekeeper in a hand- 
 somely furnished house in Brooklyn. The poor High-Priest 
 and the Seventy did not fare so well : they were expected to 
 wait until they reached Zion. The two young ladies to whom 
 they were engaged were amiable and good girls who would 
 without doubt have met with excellent husbands either in or 
 out of the Church ; but the name of an Apostle or High- 
 Priest — 'when the men themselves were away from home — 
 
"THE HAPPIEST OF THE THREE." 1 89 
 
 earned with it many charms, and won the hearts of the young 
 ladies and their friends. The Apostle was, of course, well 
 used to the training of wives in the " celestial order," and 
 when he returned home with his youngest bride he suffered 
 no particular inconvenience. But the High-Priests realised 
 the truth of the adage " the course of true love never did 
 run smooth." The first wife of one of them refused to have 
 anything to do with his new bride, and kept him at a respect- 
 ful distance from herself then and ever afterwards ; while the 
 first wife of the other declined to acknowledge the claims of 
 her youthful rival. * The first High-Priest has gone to heaven ; 
 the other, in the course of time, gave a bill of divorce to his 
 young wife. What happiness either of these three girls found 
 in Polygamy, they best know, but the young widow appears 
 decidedly the happiest of the three. 
 
 I had heard so much while in London about men taking 
 wives " from principle " and that, after the first wife, they 
 made no open display of their love, but I could not see tha;t 
 they differed in the slightest from their Gentile brethren in 
 that respect ; the Utah Elders, of whom I have spoken, al- 
 ways seemed to me very human. In all Polygamic courtships 
 that I have since witnessed, the brethren have appeared to 
 think that the" " Lord's " revelation was a trifle too slow in ar- 
 ranging affairs of the heart, and they have very zealously pre- 
 pared for its coming. In some instances the revelation has 
 come too late, and in many others it would have been very dis- 
 astrous if it had not come at all. In all cases it may be safely 
 asserted that all that has been said about getting the consent 
 of the first wife and obtaining a revelation from the Lord as 
 to whether it is pleasing in His sight for a man to take an- 
 other wife, or not — is purely folly and nonsense. Brigham 
 Young is the only " lord " who has ever been consulted on 
 that question. If he acknowledged this to the people and 
 they chose to abide by it, they alone would be to blame ; but 
 it is the grossest of frauds for men claiming to be the repre- 
 sentatives of Jesus Christ to play upon the credulity of an 
 honest people, trifling with the most sacred subjects, and tell- 
 
190 TRUE SOURCE OF MODERN REVELATIONS. 
 
 ing them that God answers by special revelation and declares 
 whether or not it is His will that each of these plural mar- 
 riages should take place. The Apostles and Elders them- 
 selves are not deceived. They know well enough that there is 
 no truth in all this mockery ; they know that the only 
 source of all their revelations is the man Brigham Young. 
 
CHAPTER XIV. 
 
 SAINTLY PILGRIM^ ON THE WAY— THE "DIVINE" HAND- 
 CART SCHEME. 
 
 The Eastern Saints — Service in Williamsburgh— " Tiie "Prophet of the Lord " 
 Tries an Experiment — The Pilgrims Cross the Plains — The Hand-Cart 
 Scheme— The Poor Emigrants— A " Divine " Plan— The Great Gathering to 
 Zion — An Interesting Letter from Mary Burton — How Elder Shrewsbury Won 
 
 his Bride — A Solemn Oath Against Polygamy — Mary Burton's Marriage 
 
 Arrival of the Hand-Cart Emigrants — Scene at Castle Gardens — Meeting with 
 Mary Burton and her Husband — The Story of her Courtship — Her Trustful 
 Enthusiasm — Proposing to make Brigham Younga AV»f / — Anticipations of 
 War — How the Prophet Defrauded Brother Tenant of Sixty Thousand Dol- 
 lars—The Pilgrims Leave for the West— The Story of a Truant Wife — Second , 
 Thoughts are Sometimes Best — The Mormon Paper Comes to Grief — A New 
 Trial o£ Faith — Literary Work — Waiting for Permission to Journey Zion- 
 ward. 
 
 ONE Sunday morning in early spring, I attended a meet- 
 ing of the Saints in Williamsburgh. 
 
 My husband was there and took part in the service, and so 
 did the Apostle Taylor, and one or two other Utah Elders. 
 I went to that meeting in a very desponding state of mind, 
 for our prospects since the day of our arrival had not 
 brightened very much, and I felt the need of some comfort- 
 ing and cheering words. 
 
 Whether it was the influence of the clear spring morning, 
 or that the Elders had noticed the depression of spirit 
 among the Saints, I cannot tell, but I know that on that 
 particular occasion their words seemed to me more earnest 
 and encouraging than they had been for a long time past 
 
192 THE "divine" plan. 
 
 As we came out from the meeting, Brother Benton, one of 
 the Elders, stepped up to my husband and said : " Brother 
 Stenhouse, they are expected to arrive to-night or to-morrow ; 
 I suppose you will be down at the " Gardens " to meet them." 
 
 I knew well enough who " they " were who were expected' 
 to arrive, and so did Mr. Stenhouse. " Yes," he said, " of 
 course I shall be there, but most likely we shall have to wait 
 a few days before they come.^' Then he stopped and talked 
 over the matter with Elder Benton. 
 
 Now it chanced that at that time Brigham Young was try-- 
 ing an experiment. The " Prophet of the Lord " sometimes 
 finds it necessary — notwithstanding the "revelations" which he 
 is supposed to receive — to try experiments like other men be- 
 fore he can feel sure that his plans are likely to succeed. The 
 only difference between him and other men is, that he^ — know- 
 ing himself that his plans are his own inventions, or the in- 
 ventions of the leaders — gives out that they come direct from 
 God, thereby deceiving the ignorant, innocent, and confiding 
 people ; and when his plans fail, as they often do, he never 
 confesses that he is wrong or mistaken, but lays all the blame 
 on some other person, or, failing that, on " the Lord " or the 
 devil. Other men, as a rule, say nothing about the "Lord" or 
 devil, but when their experiments fail, they frankly confess 
 that they themselves were not inspired, but were liable to err. 
 That is all the difference. 
 
 In the present instance Brigham Young tried an experi- 
 ment upon a rather large scale. 
 
 Up to the year 1856, the Mormon emigrants made th^ 
 journey from the Frontiers across the Plains by ox-teams, as 
 I have already described, and every season some of the 
 wealthier Mormons formed themselves into an independent 
 company, paid their own expenses, and travelled with more' 
 comfort. The expense to the poorer emigrants was very 
 small, for they performed the greater part of the journey on 
 foot — the ox-teams being used for transporting provisions and 
 baggage — one hundred pounds of the latter being aliowed to 
 each emigrant. 
 
PILGRIMS CROSSING THE PLAINS. I93 
 
 This "plan" was, so far, a success, and the settlements of the 
 Saints increased thereby slowly but surely, in population and 
 wealth. There were, however, at that time thousands of 
 Saints in Europe anxious to emigrate, but who were too poor 
 to provide the small sum requisite for that purpose. During 
 the winter of 1855, this difficulty was discussed in Conference 
 by Brigham and the leading men in Salt Lake, and some ojie 
 suggested what was afterwards known as the "Hand-Cart 
 Scheme." The idea of this "scheme" was to transfer the 
 people from Liverpool to the Frontiers in the cheapest possi- 
 ble way, and for fhem then to cross the Plains with light- 
 made hand-carts, just strong enough to carry the fewest possi- 
 ble necessary articles, but sufficiently light for the men, 
 women, and even young girls, to draw them. 
 
 This "plan" would not perhaps have been a bad one if it had 
 been properly carried out, and if Brigham Young had seen, 
 as he might have done, that suitable preparations were made 
 beforehand. But the Hand-Cart Emigration Scheme began 
 with a lie and ended in ruin. 
 
 The confiding Saints were told that "God" had specially in- 
 spired His servant Brigham for this purpose, and the scheme 
 was a revelation direct from on high. No proper measures 
 were taken to provide for the emigrants — all was done upon 
 faith — faith on the part of the people in their — as they sup- 
 posed — inspired leaders ; deception on the part of those lead- 
 ers towards the people, whose only fault was that they trusted 
 them too well. 
 
 The Millennial Star proclaimed the "plan" to the Saints in 
 Europe, and so great was the response to this special sum- 
 mons that in that year — 1856 — it was roughly estimated that 
 no fewer than five or six thousand Mormon emigrants 
 travelled from Liverpool to Salt Lake City. It was the first 
 company of these emigrants that Brother Benton alluded to 
 when he told Mr. Stenhouse that "they" were expected that 
 night or the next ; but in those days emigrant vessels were fre- 
 quently delayed by adverse winds and other circumstances, and 
 no one could calculate upon the exact time of their arrival in port. 
 
194 SHE PROMISED TO BECOME HIS WIFE. 
 
 The following morning, my husband when he returned from 
 the Mormon office, brought with him a letter bearing the Eng- 
 lish postmark and addressed to me in the neat unmistakeable 
 handwriting of Mary Burton. I had been waiting and watch- 
 ing for a letter from her ever since our arrival ; I was anxious 
 to hear from her, and I hastily tore it open, so impatient was I 
 to know how she was getting on. What I read interested me 
 deeply, though it did not surprise me. I had seen Mary many 
 times after the interview which I have already related, and 
 our conversations and discussions were to us of all-absorbing 
 interest ; but as they were mostly personal, I have not cared 
 to record them in this narrative. To tell the truth, her love 
 affairs with Elder Shrewsbury occupied more and more the 
 most prominent place in all our discussions. His enthusiasm 
 was perfectly infectious. As long as Mary absolutely refused 
 to see him, her love for him and her faith in Mormonism were 
 anything but overpowering. But Elder Shrewsbury was one 
 of those peculiar persons who have a sort of magnetic charm 
 about them, who without our knowing it, or even, in some 
 instances, contrary to our will and reason, enlist all our sym- 
 pathies and leave behind them an impression that we vainly 
 try to efface. He only wanted opportunity and his success 
 was sure. 
 
 Opportunity he had had for pressing his suit with Mary and 
 making an impression upon her heart, ever since the day when 
 they had met at my door, and had taken that walk together, 
 as Mary said, for the purpose of discussing important mat- 
 ters. 
 
 Now the letter which I received opened to me another 
 chapter in Mary's life which, without the gift of prophecy, I 
 might have easily predicated. Elder Shrewsbury's patience 
 and perseverance met with their due reward, and Mary at 
 length promised to become his wife ;— but fascinated though 
 ^he was, and herself almost as deeply in love as he was, she 
 nevertheless made one condition which showed that she had 
 not entirely lost that prudence and determination which she 
 had shown in the early days of their courtship: — 
 
A BRIDES CORRESPONDENCE. 1 95 
 
 " When he spoke to me in tJmt way, — ^you know hmv. Sister Stenhouse " — she 
 said in her impulsive way : — " How could I persist in saying No to him ?" It 
 wasn't in my heart to do so, I didn't say " Yes " in so many words, but I simply 
 
 said nothing, and he took my silence for consent. Then — ■ but no, I won't 
 
 even tell you everything ,1 know he thought 
 
 he was going to have it all his own way ; but I didn't think so. I told him then 
 that I had firmly resolved upon one thing— that I never would marry him unless 
 he made a solemn vow and promise before God that he would never enter into 
 Polygamy. I could not hide from him that I loved him— he knew it and could 
 see it ; but I said I never would go to Utah alone, and I certainly never would 
 marry at the risk of my husband taking another wife. No ; I was willing to 
 give him my heart, my all — it was only fair for him to do the same by me. . , 
 ... He was very near me then; and my hand was in his; and he was looking 
 up into my eyes. Then he whispered the promise I had asked of hiln, and, dear 
 Sister Stenhouse, I know I can depend upon his word. We shall be happi,er in 
 this world by ourselves, and we feel quite sure that God will not ask us to do 
 anything in heaven that would make us miserable. Perhaps I oughtn't to say 
 this, but I'm so happy that I cannot allow myself one single wretched doubt 
 about the future or my husband, such as I used to have. , . 
 
 We were married on the 27th of January. 
 
 ««••••■•••■•••■• 
 " And now we are getting ready for Zion, and are busy day and night Of 
 course you have heard of the " Divine Plan " — the Hand-Cart Scheme. Oh, 
 Sister Stenhouse, I am so very, very much ashamed of myself for all the wicked 
 things that I used to say about the Apostles and the Elders. Since our mar- 
 riage, Elder Shrewsbury has explained everything to me and set things in their 
 right light. It is a glorious privilege for us to be permitted to gather to Zion, 
 and now that I know my dear' husband will never even think of another besides 
 myself, I glory in the thought of leaving the Gentile world and all its 
 wickedness. 
 
 We go with the first company this season. 
 
 I will tell you all the rest of the news when I meet you, dear " 
 
 So Mary Burton was married, and coming with the Hand- 
 Cart Company. " Why," I said, turning to my husband " they'll 
 be here in a day or two now." r 
 
 " Perhaps to-day," he replied. 
 
 They did not, however, arrive either that day or the next ; 
 but towards the end of the week we were told that their ves- 
 sel was in the river, and I accompanied my husband to Castle 
 Gardens to see them. 
 
 A strange spectacle was presented to our view. More than 
 six hundred Mormon emigrants were gathered there, all on 
 
196 WE MET AT CASTLE GARDENS. 
 
 their way to Zion, and burning with zeal and enthusiasm wor- 
 thy of a better cause. There were aged men and women, ' 
 whose heads were hoary with the snows of many a winter, and 
 whose tottering steps had ^borne them to the verge of three 
 score years and ten ; there were stout-hearted fathers of 
 families, and matrons with sons and daughters growing up 
 around them ; there were young men in the pride and strength 
 of manhood ; and maidens in the modest blush of womanly 
 beauty; and little toddling children, and babes in their mother's 
 arms — all obedient to what they thought was the command of 
 God Himself — all with their faces set steadfastly and anxiously 
 Zionward. 
 
 Let not the reader smile at the blind infatuation of those 
 poor emigrants. Would he or she have suffered so confid- 
 ingly — so faithfully — for his or her religion .■' They might be 
 mistaken ; but truly theirs was a faith which "hoped all things, 
 believed all things, endured all things." Surely, in His sight — 
 who judges the heart — the blind obedience of those men and 
 women who were ready to suffer and to endure unto the 
 bitter end, because in their child-like faith they thought it was 
 His holy will — such practical devotion was more truly accept- 
 able than the formal professions of an untested faith which or- 
 thodox professors are so ready to make. 
 
 I met at Castle Gardens many whom I had known in the 
 old country ; but it was one particular face which I was anx- 
 ious to see. A man wrapped in a thick great-coat, and with a 
 fur cap upon his head, brushed against me ; and before I had 
 time to raise my eyes, my hand was grasped in his, and I heard 
 Mary's husband say " Oh Sister Stenhouse, I'm so glad to see 
 you : I knew we should meet you in New York. Come and 
 see Mary. She's my Mary now! " 
 
 I went with Elder Shrewsbury and I saw Mary. But oh, 
 how greatly was she changed ! When I returned from our 
 Swiss mission and saw her, after an interval of several years, 
 I was, of course, struck with the alteration which had then 
 transformed her from a pretty little fairy-like girl into a decor- 
 ous .young lady contemplating matrimony ; but although I had 
 
MATRIMONY CHANGED HEK. I97 
 
 now been absent from England only a few months, I observed 
 a much more striking alteration in her than on the previous 
 occasion. It was not now, I thought, so much an outward and 
 personal change, as a new development of her inner con- 
 sciousness — her soul itself. Her form was as graceful, and 
 her eyes as bright as ever ; but from those eyes there now 
 shone forth another light than that which I had thought so 
 charming in the by-gone time. 
 
 Her affection for me was as warm and demonstrative as 
 when we first met :— ^-She recognised me in a moment, before 
 her husband had time to say a word ; and, throwing both her 
 airms round me, she kissed me again and again with all the 
 effusion of her childish days. Taking my hand she led me 
 gently into a quiet corner and seated me beside her upon a big 
 trunk, and then she began to talk. It was the same soft 
 sweet voice again, which used to be so dear to me when I was 
 left all alone in Southampton, soon after my marriage, while 
 my husband was on mission in Italy. 
 
 She told me all the story of her courtship — all, and much 
 more than she had told me in her letter. But it was when she 
 came to speak of her marriage, of her husband, arid especially 
 of their pilgrimage to Utah that I observed more especially 
 the change which had taken place in her. She was no longer 
 the light-hearted girl, half-doubting her strange religion, and 
 rejecting it altogether when it did not coincide with her own 
 ideas and wishes. No : Elder Shrewsbury — had he been ten 
 times a Mormon Elder — could not have wished for a more obe- 
 dient, a more earnest, I might say — a more fanatical believer 
 than was now to be found in his young and beautiful wife. 
 Her eyes really glowed with enthusiasm as she spoke of " the 
 work of the Lord" and of "gathering to Zion;" and her voice, 
 though soft and sweet as ever, had in it, now and then, a tinge 
 of sternness which told of a determination and spirit which 
 the casual observer would never have suspected. 
 
 I expressed some surprise that she and her husband, not 
 being without funds, should have gone with the Hand-Cart 
 Company when they might have waited and have gone with 
 
igS A MATTER OF FAITH. 
 
 SO much more comfort with one of the independent com- 
 panies. 
 
 " Why, Sister Stenhouse," she said, " We have done it as a 
 matter of faith. Certainly we could have afforded to go in 
 any way we chose, but my husband said we ought to be an 
 example to the poorer saints ; so we gave away nearly all our 
 money to help the emigration fund, and then we came, just as 
 you see us, along with the rest." 
 
 "But the danger and discomfort is so great," I suggested. 
 "Surely the Lord does not want us to sacrifice ourselves when 
 no one is benefitted by it .'" 
 
 " Not a bit," said she, " there's no danger. Sister Stenhouse, 
 and if there were it would only please me all the more. As 
 for discomfort, why we should have had that any way, and we 
 both glory in making sacriiices. Besides which, we have been 
 told by the Apostle that this will be the most pleasant and 
 successful journey across the plains that has ever been 
 made." 
 
 " I am a little doubtful of the promises of Apostles and 
 Elders," I said, " and I remember, Mary, when you used to 
 agree with me." 
 
 " I know I did," she answered, " but Brother Shrewsbury 
 has shown me how wrong I was — I never doubt now. But I 
 think you have a wrong notion about this hand-cart scheme. 
 It is not an ordinary plan such as any man might have made. 
 God Himself revealed this plan to Brigham, and in fact we 
 zail it ' the divine plan ' in our songs. Oh, you should hear 
 our songs! They're a little rough, but the singing is so 
 earnest and the voices of the men and girls blend so well 
 together that I know you'd like them. There's only one 
 thing that I don't like about this plan, and that I daresay is 
 all right if only I knew it." 
 
 " I think, Mary," I said, " I could tell you a good deal that 
 you wouldn't like if you knew it." 
 
 "No, dear," she replied hastily, as if afraid to hear me, 
 "don't tell me unpleasant matters. I'll tell you all I meant. 
 The Prophet and Heber C. Kimball, and Jedediah Grant 
 
BRIGHAM YOUNG PROPOSED AS KING ! igg 
 
 counselled the richer emigrants to give as much as they could 
 —all their property, if they had faith enough— to help the 
 poor brethren to emigrate; but the American Elders had 
 private instructions— so Brother Shrewsbury told me— to use 
 the money to help out all the unmarried girls who are willing 
 to go. I confess that this troubled me not a little ; but my 
 husband says that when we get to Zion we shall find all will 
 be right, and of course I believe him." 
 
 Mary's conversation puzzled me a good deal at the time. 
 She had formerly ^een so clear-sighted and so unbiassed by 
 prejudice, and now she seemed ready to believe anything. 
 All her husband's enthusiasm was now her own; she saw 
 •with his eyes, and in the intensity of her love for him she 
 believed all that he accepted as true. Long after, when I 
 thought of that short interview, I called to mind her impulsive 
 earnestness, and I felt that a secret misgiving, unconsciously 
 to herself, was partly the cause of it. Unknown to herself 
 her excess of zeal was the offspring of doubt. 
 
 Life in the future was in anticipation to my poor friend one 
 long day of hope and happiness. She could not see the 
 shadow of a cloud — no coming sorrow darkened her way. 
 Zion, to her excited imagination, was the abode of peace, and 
 sanctity, and unchanging joy. 
 
 I asked her whether the Saints in England had heard any 
 of those strange reports about Brigham Young defying the 
 Government, which had attracted so much attention in this 
 Country. 
 
 " Certainly," she said, " it is because the day is so very 
 near when all intercourse between God's people and the 
 Gentile world shall be cut off for ever that these great efforts 
 are being made to gather the Saints to Zion. Of course you 
 know this, but I don't think you know all. Why, at the last 
 general conference in Liverpool, the president had instruc- 
 tions from Salt Lake to propose Brigham Young as 'prophet, 
 seer, revelator, and King!'" 
 
 "King?" I said, "How can President Young ever be 
 'king.'' Utah is part of the territory of the States, and 
 
200 HOW BROTHER TENANT LOST HIS MONEY. 
 
 linder their jurisdiction ; it is not even a State itself yet, and 
 Congress has refused to sanction the name of Deseret. This 
 country will never suffer a kingdom to be set up in Utah ; 
 you must be misinformed, Sister Mary." 
 
 "No, Sister Stenhouse," she exclaimed, "I am under no 
 mistake. My husband assured me that the conference 
 accepted the proposition, and that it was received unanimously. 
 The Saints are gathering in from all parts of the world, and 
 when war is declared they will not be found unprepared. 
 Why, here on board with us, the American Elders are all 
 provided with swords and revolvers of the very best make 
 that could be got for love or money, and I myself have heard 
 them say that Brigham Young intends shortly to declare his 
 independence of the United States. We didn't know this 
 before we left England, but we felt sure that he had some 
 great purpose in view which had been revealed to him." 
 
 " Before we left," I said, " the Saints were all eager to 
 emigrate." 
 
 " Yes, dear," she answered, " but nothing like they are now. 
 You have no idea how excited and anxious everybody is. 
 Some of the people, in order to obey counsel, sold their 
 watches and jewelry, and even their best clothes, scarcely 
 keeping enough for the journey, and every one who had any 
 money gave it away. Brigham Young set a noble example in 
 that ; even the Gentiles would admire him if they knew alL 
 Why, we had on board ship with us Brother Tenant, the' rich, 
 new convert who paid thirty thousand dollars for the property 
 which Brigham Young so generously gave to help the Emi- 
 gration Fund. He hardly had enough left to carry him and 
 his family to Zion ; and now he is going to cross the Plains 
 with us, to settle in Salt Lake City. He is somewhere here 
 among the emigrants, I believe, at the present moment, and 
 you could ask him all about it if you liked. The brethren 
 assure him that Brother Brigham is so liberal that he will get 
 vastly more than the value of his thirty thousand dollars when 
 he reaches Zion, and I hope he will, for I like both him and 
 his wife." 
 
PARTING WITH AN OLD FRIEND. 201 
 
 All this was thus far true, but it was with some misgivings 
 that I heard Mary talk about it. Still I tried to persuade 
 myself that it was a sin to doubt. How little did either of us 
 imagine that after poor Mr. Tenant's miserable death upon 
 the Plains we should live to see his wife — destitute and 
 defrauded of her property by generous-hearted Brigham — 
 dragging out a miserable existence in Zion, and dependent 
 even for a crust of bread upon the kindness of the brethren. 
 And yet, as I previously stated in another place, this was 
 how the Prophet, under the mask of liberality, contrived, for 
 his own purposes, to cheat this unfortunate and too-confiding 
 Saint. 
 
 Then we talked of what more nearly interested ourselvesy 
 and Mary asked me when Mr. Stenhouse and myself were 
 coming out. I told her that it was quite uncertain, but that 
 we expected to before long. " At any rate you will come out 
 before the season is over," she said. 
 
 " Most likely so," I replied, " but you will be safely there 
 and settled before we arrive." 
 
 How little did she imagine the fearful scenes she was to 
 witness — the terrible sufferings she was to endure before the 
 season she spoke of had passed away. Could I at that time 
 have known all, I would have prayed that sooner than set out 
 •on that fearful journey she might find refuge in the grave 
 from the horrors which, unknown to her, were brooding over 
 her way. 
 
 We talked long, and then my husband joined us — Elder 
 Shrewsbury was called away by some necessary duty — and 
 when we parted it was with many promises to write frequently 
 to each other of our common religious interests, as well as the 
 welfare of ourselvtes and those we loved. Then I spoke with 
 several other old friends, and we exchanged greetings with all 
 sorts of people, for my husband wherever he goes is always 
 sure to be upon speaking terms with almost everybody he 
 meets. 
 
 The Hand-Cart Company left New York for Utah— a long 
 and formidable journey at best— but in that instance, through 
 
 13 
 
202 . THE HAND-CART EMIGRATION. 
 
 ' mismanagement and neglect, one of the most fatal expeditions 
 that imprudent man has ever undertaken ; and it was not 
 until months and months had passed away, and another 
 season had come round that we heard anything of their fate; 
 
 And time went on, but my troubles did not lighten. My 
 husband stilL continued to work at the Mormon office, and 
 after a while his salary was slightly increased from time to 
 time ; but still his earnings were altogether inadequate for the 
 support of a faipily, and I found it absolutely necessary to 
 obtain some employment for myself. It cost me many a long 
 ajjd weary day of search and enquiry, and many a battle with 
 my pride before I could get anything to do, but at last I was 
 successful, and although my little ones required constant 
 attention, I contrived to add a very decent quota to the 
 scanty family purse. 
 
 And thus matters continued until the following year — our 
 life of uncertainty and care unchanged. Little in my life at 
 that time is worth recording : to me it was one long, painful 
 struggle, and any change which could come, I felt must be' 
 for the better. My experience of Mormonism was of course 
 enlarged as new facts presented themselves to my observation, 
 and by nothing was my faith so much shaken as by the dis- 
 crepancies between the written and spoken Mormonism which ■ 
 was presented with fair face to the European, Saints and the 
 world at large, and the actual conduct of the Elders. 
 
 From the first moment when Polygamy was announced, 
 the leaders had strictly forbidden the missionaries to enter 
 into any alliances with the sisters abroad, or to make' any 
 proposals of- marriage to them, or to enter into any matri- 
 monial covenants. In the language of Heber C. Kimball-^ 
 Brigham's first counsellor— they were " not to pick out from 
 the flock the young, fair, and tender lambs," but were to 
 bring them all safely home to Zion. 
 
 This counsel was all very well, for it tended, to keep the 
 Elders out of mischief, and afforded an opportunity to the 
 brethren at home- to select more, and more youthful wives 
 from the fair converts who were gathered in to Zion. But- 
 
A RUNAWAY WIFE. 203 
 
 the missionaries f otmd it very irksome to obey this Counsel, 
 and in point of fact, those who did so formed a very small 
 minority. 
 
 One of the Missionaries who had just returned from Europe 
 came one day to our house in New York, and brought a 
 youthful sister with him. He was by no means a handsome 
 man or prepossessing in his appearance, but I saw at once 
 that he had succeeded in obtaining considerable influence 
 over the young sister's mind. He said she was not very 
 happy, and he wanted her to stay with some respectable 
 family f ot a week* or two until they set out for Utah, and I 
 agreed that she should stay' with us. 
 
 She begaii to play with the children, and took one of thenl 
 in her arms in a way which attracted my . attention, for I 
 noticed that tears were in her eyesj and she excited my sym^^ 
 pathy. I asked her as gently and as delicately as I could 
 what was the matter with her, and what her sorrow was, and 
 she told me that she herself had two little ones at home and 
 was wretched at being parted from them. She had obeyed . 
 counsel, and had left her husband and a happy home to go to 
 Zion. She loved them all dearly, but deluded by false teach- 
 ings, and promises that she should soon have her children 
 again, she had stolen away and left them all. 
 
 I reasoned with her, tried to make her see how wrongly 
 she had acted, and persuaded her to return to her husband 
 and seek his forgiveness. No ; it was all in vain. The sal- 
 vation of her soul she thought was beyond all earthly con- 
 siderations ; she must stifle the suggestions of her heart 
 within her ; she must hasten to Zion.- Thus she left me, and 
 like many another victim, I never expected to see her again. 
 
 One morning, a few months later, I was astonished t& 
 receive a visit from -her. After expressing my pleasure at 
 seeing her once more, shfe told me that what I said had so 
 impressed her that when the emigrants had arrived at St. 
 Louis she had refused to' proceed any further on the journCy, 
 had written to her husband, had' made all right with him, and 
 was now on her way hkck to her home in England. 
 
204 THE "mormon" discontinued. 
 
 My story is so full of painful reminiscences, that it is with 
 pleasure that I record this incident — one of the rare cases 
 in which folly was not succeeded by utter ruin and misery. 
 Alas, how many instances I might mention, which fell 
 beneath my own personal' observation, of wives and mothers 
 led away by the delusive doctrines which they mistook for 
 inspiration, and who sought vainly, through years of misery, 
 for peace and rest, until at length they found it in the dark- 
 ness of the tomb. 
 
 Towards the end of the year 1857, the difficulties in Utah, 
 and a financial panic in New York, resulted in the discon- 
 tinuance of the Mormon. My husband was thus thrown out 
 of employment, and to add to our difficulties, the people for 
 whom I worked suspended operations. This new trial of our 
 faith, however, was not long ; out of apparent evil, good came. 
 Released from his obligations to the Apostle and the Mormon 
 paper, my husband now set earnestly to work to obtain a 
 living without the crippling influences of "counsel" or the 
 dictates of those whom his religion taught him to respect. 
 
 I had always believed that if suffered to act for himself, 'his 
 energy was such that he would certainly carve his way to a 
 respectable position in the world. In this I was not deceived, 
 either at the time of which I speak or at a later period when 
 in Salt Lake City he engaged in active business on his own 
 account. In New York, where he had been, by this time, ap- 
 pointed President of the Eastern Mission, and was actively 
 engaged in advocating the claims of the Mormon Church, he 
 saught and found employment on the staff of the Herald, and 
 in connection with other daily papers ; and such was his suc- 
 cess, that from a condition of misery and poverty we were very 
 soon raised to a position of comfort, and surrounded by every 
 luxury suitable to our station in life ; and this position we en- 
 joyed until called upon to leave all and journey across the 
 Plains to Zion. 
 
 Our own journey to Zion was postponed for a while ; but 
 not long before we set forth, I received the long-expected 
 letter which Mary Burton had promised me ; and as it con- 
 
A TERRIBLE STORY. 20$ 
 
 tains a vivid picture of a mode of transit — the only mode 
 which could then be used — across the Plains ; and shows what 
 people were forced to endure so recently as a few short years 
 ago, I shall give extracts from it in the following chapter ; for 
 I feel sure that if the reader did not peruse the story in the 
 exact words of my unfortunate friend, he never would believe 
 that in this country and in our own times such^ terrible trag- 
 edy could have been enacted. 
 
CHAPTER XV. 
 
 A TERRIBLE STORY:— THE HAND-CART EMIGRANTS CROSSING 
 THE PLAINS. 
 
 The Hand-Cart Emigration — Mary Burton's Story — Crossing the Plains — The 
 Camp at Iowa City — Shameful Neglect of the Church Authorities — Making 
 the Hand-Carts— The Outfit of the Emigrants— On the Way—" A Day's 
 March Nearer Home " — Stout-hearted Pilgrims — Travelling through Iowa — 
 Showing Kindness to the Emigrants — Need of Help and Sympathy — Perils 
 and Privations of the Journey — How they Suffered Hunger, and Fainted by 
 the Way — Very Scanty Rations — Distress of the Women and Children : the 
 Weak ^nd the Sickly — How the Church " took Care " of the Emigrants' Money 
 — Suffering from the Heat — Arriving at Florence, near Omaha — How a Mass- 
 meeting was Held — Taking Counsel — A Rash and Foolish Decision — Offer- 
 ing to Swallow a Snow-Storm — Brave Advice of Elder Levi Savage — " Weak 
 in the Faith " — How they Continued their fatal Pilgrimage — The Camp at 
 Eventide — False and Dangerous Security — The Carts Break down — The 
 Cattle Stampede — On Short Allowance — Visitors of Importance Arrive — 
 Delusive Prophecy of the Apostles — How they took the Bread of the Starving 
 — Selfish Conduct of Saintly Leaders — Promises of Help. 
 
 I PROMISED to write and tell you all about our journey 
 across the Plains, but I little expected to have such a 
 terrible tale to tell. 
 
 " You have heard so much of the journey to Salt Lake Val- 
 ley that you know pretty well how we must have travelled to 
 Iowa City where it was necessary that we should wait until 
 the whole company was quite ready for the long journey which 
 lay before us. 
 
 " Our life up to a certain point was much the same, and we 
 met with the same difficulties as all other emigrants who had 
 gone before us. But there the comparison ends. Privation, 
 
THE JOURNEY ACROSS THE PLAINS. 207 
 
 and toil, and weariness, and not infrequently sickness and 
 death, wore out many of the companies that went before us, 
 but they never suffered as we did. It is utterly impossible 
 for me to tell you all that we went through. And when I 
 finish this letter and lay down my pen, and even when you 
 read the fearful story of my own experience during that jour- 
 ney, you will still have but the faintest idea of the horrors and 
 sufferings which we endured. 
 
 " At Iowa City we found nothing prepared for us. When 
 we left Liverpool we were told that hand-carts, provisions, and 
 all that we needed should be provided before we arrived. If 
 this had been done we should have had just fairly time 
 enough to travel over the Plains and reach Salt Lake before 
 the terrible cold of winter set in. As it was, everything went 
 wrong. The Elders who had been sent out before us to buy 
 tents and carts and all that we wanted, had either been 
 ynfortunate or very careless, for, as I said, when we ar- 
 »rived in Iowa City not the slightest preparation had been 
 made. 
 
 " You know how strong my faith was "when we left New 
 York and how Brother Shrewsbury and myself were ready to 
 sacrifice everything. I can assure you that we were fully 
 tested, and I do think that but for our strong faith, not a 
 single soul of all that conipany would have survived that 
 journey. 
 
 " Three companies had, after a long delay, teen sent out 
 before we reached Iowa City. As it was then early in the 
 season they completed their journey before the cold of winter 
 set in. I afterwards heard that Brigham YOung and the Eld- 
 ers, when they saw those companies arrive safely in Salt Lake 
 City, spoke of the scheme as a successful experiment. We had 
 been taught that the scheme came directly from heaven and 
 was neither speculation nor experiment, and when I heard 
 that, after all, the Prophet himself spoke of it as a -matter 
 of doubtful issue, . I asked myself— Who then can we be- 
 Ueve .' 
 
 " We waited three, weeks in Iowa Camp while they W6re 
 
208i THE HAND-CART EMIGRANTS. 
 
 making the hand-carts. They were very lightly made and 
 I think not at all suitable for such a long and wearisome jour- 
 ney ; and being so hastily put together and most of the wood 
 unseasoned, they were utterly unfit for the rough work for 
 which they were constructed. Twenty of these carts — one to. 
 every five — were allowed to every hundred persons, who were 
 also allowed five good-sized tents, and one Chicago wagon, 
 with three yoke of oxen to transport the baggage and provis- 
 ions. We were only allowed seventeen pounds of bedding 
 and clothing each, which, with cooking utensils, &c., made up 
 about one hundred pounds to each cart, and that was quite as 
 much as the cart (itself only sixty pounds in weight) could 
 carry. You can see. Sister Stenhouse, how difficult it must 
 have been out of every hundred persons — men, women, and 
 children — to find twenty who were strong enough to pull even 
 such frail things as those hand-carts were. The married men 
 and the young men and boys did the best they could, but they 
 could do no more, and some of the carts were drawn by young' 
 girls alone. 
 
 " The girls and women who had no husbands used to oc- 
 cupy a tent by themselves at night, but in the other tents, 
 whole families, without respect to age or sex, together with 
 the young men who assisted them during the day, used to 
 find shelter. This you will see at once was exceedingly in- 
 convenient, but we had no choice, and we had been so 
 long associated and had suffered so much together that 
 we did not feel it as much as we otherwise must have 
 done. 
 
 " What weary days we spent ! Hour after hour went by, 
 mile after mile we walked, and never, never seemed to be a 
 step the further on our way. Sometimes I recalled to mind a 
 hymn which we used to sing at Sunday School, when I was a 
 child — an evening hymn in which we returned thanks that we 
 were — 
 
 'A day's inarch nearer home.' 
 
 " But day after day went by— wearily, hopelessly — and 
 
PASSING THROUGH IOWA. 209 
 
 when each night came on, and, tired and footsore, we lay 
 down to rest we seemed no nearer to our home in Zion. 
 
 "Do not think, Sister Stenhouse, that we gave way to 
 despondency. What we felt, God alone knows ; but our poor 
 weary hearts were full of confiding faith in Him, and we 
 placed undoubting confidence in the promises and prophecies 
 which we had received through His chosen servants. The 
 young folks were light-hearted and gay, and with all the en- 
 thusiasm of youth they pressed on, thinking not of the way 
 but only of the end ; and their example was most encour- 
 aging. 
 
 " My husband was one of the bravest and truest of all that 
 band. He drew the cart which we shared with another Elder 
 and his wife and their grown-up daughter. They were old 
 people — I mean the Elder and his wife — and the daughter was 
 an old maid, unpleasant, thin, and sour, and too feeble to do 
 anything. There were reasons why I was excused from tak- 
 ing any share in hard work ; but I felt as zealous as the 
 rest, and day after day walked beside my husband thinking 
 that, if nothing more, my companionship might cheer him. 
 The old folks walked behind, and so did the children, but 
 sometimes, when the little ones were very weary indeed, the 
 parents would place them on the top of the bedding in the 
 hand-cart and give them a lift. But some of the elderly peo- 
 ple who were unused to walking far, and whom it was impos- 
 sible to carry, suffered a great deal ; and sometimes mothers 
 with children at their breasts would trudge on mile after mile 
 in all the heat and dust without a murmur or complaint 
 until they almost dropped down with fatigue. What some of 
 those poor creatures suffered, no words could tell. 
 "The sun shone down upon us with intense heat as we trav- 
 elled through Iowa, and the people from the farm-houses and 
 villages came out to see us and wondered at our rashness in 
 undertaking such a journey. They were very kind to us and 
 came and visited us in our camps and offered some of the men 
 work and good wages if they would wait there instead of going 
 on to Zion. A few of the people accepted these offers, but 
 
210 THE CHURCH "TAKING CARE" OF THE MONEY, 
 
 the Elders, as you'iiiay'suppose, watched carefully every com^ 
 pany and every man; and in the evening, when meetings for 
 prayer and preaching were held, we were earnestly exhorted ta 
 obedience, andthe sin of acting upon our own judgments was 
 set forth in the very plainest terms. The kindness of the 
 Iowa people, however, encouraged us, and they freely gave 
 to those who most needed whatever they could to help us on 
 our way. ^ j 
 
 " And we needed help and sympathy. 
 
 " Of course, with only one wagon to carry all the provision* 
 for a hundred persons, besides five tents, our suppiy of food 
 was very limited. At that period of the journey the gro-«rnT 
 up people were allowed ten ounces of flour a day and a little — 
 and but a very httle — coffee, sugar, rice, and bacon. This 
 was a very scanty allowance for people who all day long had 
 to draw the hand-carts or to trudge mile after mile in all that 
 burning heat and dust — but we never complained. Some of 
 the men, ate all their rations at 'breakfast,*and went without 
 anything more until the next morning, unless *they were abtt 
 to beg a little of some friendly farmer by the way. The little 
 children received just half as much as the others. With a 
 -very small amount of management this inconvenience might 
 certainly have been avoided, for provisions of all sorts were 
 "very cheap in the districts through which we passed. Some 
 of the more thoughtful Saints, I know, felt very bitterly thfc 
 injustice of this, for, as you are aware, we had paid a// our ex- 
 penses in full — even to the uttermost farthing ; and we bad 
 "been promised in return a safe and sufficient outfit with plerftjr 
 •of provisions, and in fact all that was necessary. Had we been 
 left to ourselves we should of course have provided for every 
 contingency ; but we came in obedience to counsel under tlie 
 'direction of the Church, and after we had paid for everything ; 
 the Church even " took care " of our money, so that we there- 
 fore could not procure necessaries by the way, as otherwise 
 we might have done. 
 
 " Thus wearily, and suffering not a little privatioHi we 
 'travelled all through Iowa until we came to the Missouri 
 
A THOUSAND MILES ON FOOT. SIj[ 
 
 river and encamped at Florence, a place about six miles north 
 of Omaha, and there we remained about a week preparing for 
 our journey across the Plains. 
 
 "lit was the middle of August when we arrived at Florence, 
 and we had been delayed so much on the way that it appeared 
 •to many of the more experienced that it would now be, the 
 height of imprudence for us to cross the Plains at that season. 
 With old people, delicate women, and little children, and with- 
 out carriages of sny sort — except the frail hand-carts that car- 
 'ried our bedding — it. would be a weary long time, before we 
 copld reach Salt Lake. Every step must be trudged on foot, 
 sand it was quite impossible that we could walk many miles a 
 day, while there was before us a journey of over a thou- 
 sand. Some of the Elders proposed; that we should settle 
 ■where we were, or somewhere near by until the following 
 .spring, and then go on to Zion ; but others who were more 
 confident urged that we should proceed at once. The Elders 
 called a great meeting to settle the matter, at which we were 
 all present. 
 
 "I should t0ll you that when we first started, our whole 
 company was placed under the guidance of Elder James G. 
 Willie as captain ; and we were again sub-divided into five 
 parties of about one hundred each, and over every hundred 
 was placed an Elder or sub-captain. The first hundred was 
 .headed by Elder Atwood, the second by Levi Savage, the 
 thiifd by William Woodward, the fourth by John Chislett, and 
 the fif& by Elder Ahmensen. About two hundred of the 
 people were Scotch and Scandinavians ; nearly all the rest 
 were English. All were assembled at the meeting. You 
 know. Sister Stenhouse, how meetings were held at home. 
 Well, it was just the same there. We, of course, had nothing 
 really to say — we had only to obey counsel and sanction the 
 decision of the leading Elders. I used to feel annoyed rather 
 at that sort of thing m London, as you may remember, but 
 now when life and death depended upon the wisdom of our 
 decision, with all ray faith, I felt worse than annoyed, wicked 
 as J have no 4aubit it was for me to feel so. My husband 
 
212 PRUDENT COUNSEL REJECTED. 
 
 never uttered a word, but I know he felt much as I did, and 
 in that he was not alone among the Elders. 
 
 " We had neither vote nor influence — the elders held our 
 destiny in their hands. In all our company there were only 
 three or four men who had been out to Salt Lake before, and 
 of course they could not be overlooked, so they gave their 
 opinion at the meeting. They must have fully known the 
 dangers and difficulties of the way, and what hardships must 
 overtake a company so scantily provided for as was ours, if 
 we continued our journey. But, for all that, they not only 
 spoke slightingly of the danger which threatened us, but 
 prophesied in the name of the Lord, that we should pass 
 through triumphantly and suffer neither loss nor harm. 
 
 "One man alone — Levi Savage — dared to tell the truth. 
 People well-mounted, or even with good ox-teams, could safely 
 and easily make the journey, he said, but for a band of peo- 
 ple 'like ourselves, with aged folks, and women, and little 
 children, to attempt it so late was little short of madness. 
 He strongly urged that we should take up our quarters there 
 for the Winter, when, he said, as soon as Spring came on, we 
 could safely and successfully perform the remainder of our 
 journey. 
 
 "The other Elders thought that he was weak in the faith, 
 and plainly told him so ; and one of them even said he'd eat 
 all the snow that fell between Florence and Salt Lake City. 
 The people, of course, believed without question what they 
 were told to believe, for they had long ago made up their 
 minds that the leaders were inspired, and therefore they dared 
 not doubt them, and the prudent counsel of Brother Savage 
 was rejected accordingly. I was not near enough to hear his 
 words, but I was afterward told that he said : 'What I have 
 said, I know is the truth ; but as you are counseled to go for- 
 ward, I will go with you ; I will work, and rest, and suffer 
 with you, and, if God wills it so, I will also die with you.' 
 Never was man more faithful to his word than was Brother 
 Savage, and often after that, when sickness, and weariness, 
 and cold, and hunger, and death, overtook us— as he had fore- 
 
Ivy *r ^^ ^ 
 
 I'll \h ' ^f ^' 
 
 1* v^-- 
 
 rji t 4 I 
 'P I, i' * 
 
 ] I 
 
 I'H- 1 
 
 JS 
 
 ^ 
 
 rH Iff I * * * -«*^ 
 
 1 . '■ ^ 
 
 
 
ACROSS THE PLAINS. 215 
 
 seen — ^he never for one moment forgot the promise which he 
 had so solemnly made. 
 
 " Then — the middle of August being passed — we left Flor- 
 ence behind us, and began our weary journiey across the 
 Plains in much the same fashion as we had already travelled 
 through Iowa. We had, however, taken in fresh provisions 
 to last us itntil we reached Utah, and as the oxen could not 
 draw so much extra weight, one sack, weighing about a hun- 
 dred pounds, was placed on each of the hand-carts, in addi- 
 tion to the other baggage.. This was a severe task upon the 
 endurance of the people, but most of them bore it without a 
 murmur. On the other hand, we fared a little better in the 
 matter of provisions, for we were allowed a pound of flour a 
 day each, and also, occasionally, a little fresh beef, and, besides 
 that, each hundred had three or four milch cows. As we 
 continued our journey, and the provisions were consumed, the 
 burdens on the carts, of course, grew lighter. 
 
 " But this was only the beginning of our pilgrimage :t— th« 
 end we could not foresee. Every evening, when we pitched 
 our tents, we endeavored by songs, and jests, and interesting 
 stories, to beguile the tediousness of the way. The days were 
 not quite so warm now, and the nights were more chilly ; but 
 altogether it was much more pleasant travelling than it was 
 in the earlier part of the journey, and no one seemed to 
 remember the almost prophetic remonstrance of Brother 
 Savage* 
 
 " Still we travelled very slowly, for the carts were always 
 breaking down ; the wheels came off, and we had nothing to 
 grease them with. The boxes of the wheels were made of. 
 unseasoned wood, and the heavy pressure upon them, anithe 
 dust that got into them, soon wore them out. Some of ' the 
 people cut off the tops of their boots and wrapped them 
 round the axles, and others cut up their tin plates and kettles 
 for the same purpose, and for grease they used soap, and even 
 their pitiful allowance of bacon. But as the days passed, and 
 the flour began to be used up, these accidents became less 
 frequent. 
 
2l6i. VISITORS ^O THE CAMP. 
 
 '"Upon an average, they said, we travelled about fifteen 
 miles a day, which I think was very good. Some few days we 
 even made a little over twenty miles, but they were balanced 
 by- the shortcomings. We tried to feer happy and hopeful, 
 and i even the aged and infirm tried to make light of their 
 toil and privations, for We did not yet see that- heavy cloud 
 which was looming across our way. I frequently talked with ■ 
 the old and weakly among the people, to whom both my hus- 
 band and myseK were able to offer little kindnesses, and they 
 all spoke cheerfully of our prospects. Such faith had they^in 
 the promises of the Elders. 
 
 "Just before we reached Wood river, vast herds of' buf- 
 faloes appeared in our vicinity, and one evening all our cattle 
 stampeded, and the men had to go in search of them. About' 
 thirty were lost, and after hunting after them for three days, 
 we gave them up. We had only one yoke of oxen now for 
 each wagon, and as the wagons were loaded each with three 
 thousand pounds of flour, the teams could not move thelti. 
 So they yoked up the beef-cattle, and cows, and heifers, but 
 they were unmanageable— ^and at last we were obliged again 
 to place a sack of flour upon each hand-cart. 
 
 " This sorely tried us all. Some of the people even com- 
 plained, but the greater part of us bore up -bravely, believing 
 that it was the will of the Lord. We still had faith that all' 
 would yet be well. This was, however, a hard blow. Our 
 milch cows were useless to us, our beef-rations were stopped, 
 and the burdens which we drew were doubled. Every otie 
 did his or her best, but many of us began to be disheartehedy 
 and could hardly get along. 
 
 "One evening there was quite a commotion in the camp. 
 We had pitched our tents for the night on the banks of the 
 Platte River, I think, when suddenly quite a grand' turn-out of 
 carriages and light wagons came up from the east and joined 
 us> Each carriage was drawn by four horses, and the outfits ■ 
 were in first-class style. Nothing could be too good for 
 Apostles and other "distinguished" servants of the Lord. I 
 was anxious to know who they were, but was not long, in- 
 
'•THE PROPHETS PROPHESY FALSELY. 31 7.- 
 
 finding out. There was the Apostle Franklin Richards, and 
 Elders Webb and Felt, and Joseph. A. Young, the son of the- 
 Prophet, and Elders Dunbar, and Kimball, and Grant — alii 
 returning Missionaries. They stayed with us all night, and 
 in the morning called a great meeting, and the Apostle Rich- 
 ards delivered a speech, which troubled me not a little, and 
 xnade me very sorrowful. 
 
 " He had heard of what Brother Savage had said, and then 
 and there, before us all, he rebuked him. He then exhorted 
 us to remember the hope set before us, and told us to pray 
 and work on, and especially to be obedient to counsel ; and he 
 finished by solemnly prophesying, in the name of the God of 
 Israel, that the Almighty would make a way for us to Zion, 
 and that though the snow might fall and the storm rage on 
 the right hand and on the left, not a hair of our heads should 
 perish. 
 
 " Some of the people wept with joy as they heard these 
 words. My own heart was full. To me, this was the voice 
 of inspiration — the voice of God — how could I doubt again.' 
 
 " Sister Stenhouse ; before a month was over, I saw with 
 my own eyes that prophecy, those promises, falsified to the 
 very letter ; and yet at the time they came to me and to all 
 else as the word of the Lord from heaveni Tell me, if men 
 can thus deceive themselves — for I do not doubt for a moment 
 that the Apostle believed his own prophecy— and if we could- 
 be so sadly deluded as to believe that what was said was 
 divine, what surety have we for our religion at all > I strive 
 against these sinful doubts, but they wii/ sometimes creep 
 into my heart unbidden. 
 
 " The Apostle and the Elders with him told Captain Willie 
 that they wanted some fresh meat, and the Elders killed and 
 gave them of our very best. What could be denied to the 
 Servants of the Lord.' We were then more than four 
 hundred in number — aged men and feeble women, with babes 
 and poor little children too young to walk; many of them 
 infirm and sick, all of them footsore and weary. We were far 
 away from home, travelling slowly hundreds and hundreds of 
 
21 8 LEFT ALONE. 
 
 miles, worn out and without sufficient provisions for the way 
 or the remotest chance of obtaining any : And yet, Oh God ! 
 I shame to tell it ; these servants of Heaven — our leaders, our 
 guides, our example — these chosen vessels who came to us, 
 riding comfortably and at ease in their well-appointed car- 
 riages, took of our poverty — took the very best we had ! 
 
 "As they left the camp, I looked up into my husband's 
 face and our eyes met. We said not a word, but in our hearts 
 there was the same thought. Sister Stenhouse, there must 
 have been that selfsame thought in the mind of many another 
 poor soul who watched those Elders depart after they had^ 
 lectured us on faith and patience and obedience ! 
 
 " They crossed the river pleasantly enough, and pointed out 
 the best fording-place and then they watched us wade through 
 — the water there being nearly a mile in width,, and in some 
 places two and even three feet in depth — and though many of 
 the 'heavy-laden carts were drawn by women and girls, they 
 never so much as offered to lend us the aid of their handsome 
 teams. One sister told me that they watched the poor people 
 crossing, through glasses, as if it were an entertainment, but 
 I did not see that, and can hardly believe it was true. All 
 that they did, however, was to promise that when we reached 
 Laramie we should find provisions and bedding and other 
 necessaries ready for us, and that they would send help from 
 Salt Lake Valley to meet us." 
 
CHAPTER XVI. 
 
 MARY BURTON'S STORY CONTINUED :— TERRIBLE ENDING 
 OF THE HAND-CART SCHEME. 
 
 The pilgrims Arrive at Laramie — Disappointed Hopes — A Message from the 
 Apostle Richards — Help Again Promised — Fearful Sufferings and Privations 
 of the Emigrants — The Frosts of Winter Come On — The Storm-Clouds are 
 Gathering — Presentiments of Death — The Night-Air of the Wilderness — The 
 Bitter End — A Wife's Unchanging Devotion — Death in the Camp — Falling 
 by the Way — A Shocking Incident — Faithful Even in Death — The Good! 
 Deeds of Elder Chislett — How Faith Sustained Them — Lost in the Snow- 
 storm — Brigham Young's Tardy Repentance — "Joseph A," Comes to the 
 Rescue — In the Grasp of Death — Fearful Position of a Brave Woman — The 
 Fvil Day Comes at Last — A Night of Horrors — Waiting for Assistance — The 
 Finger of Death — The Cry of the Wolves — A Scene Too Terrible for De- 
 scription—Who Died That Night—" God Was Near Me Then "—A Change 
 for the Better — Three Anxious Days — Light at Eventide — "Help Came Too- 
 Late for Them " — The Victims of Fanaticism — The Remnant that Arrived — 
 The Conclusion of a Terrible Story. 
 
 r T was early in September when we reached Laramie, but 
 J[ we found nothing awaiting us there. We were all very- 
 much discouraged at this, and Captain Willie called another 
 meeting for consultation. We knew, of course, beforehand,, 
 that our position was very bad, but iigures when stated plainly 
 become startling facts. We now learned that if we continued 
 at the same rate as that which we had previously been travel- 
 ling, and received each the same allowance daily, we should 
 be left utterly destitute of provisions when we were yet three 
 hundred and fifty miles from the end of our journey. Nothing 
 
 14 
 
220 THE POST-OFFICE IN THE DESERT. 
 
 remained but to reduce our allowance ; so, instead of one 
 pound, we were rationed at three-quarters of a pound a day, 
 and, at the same time, were forced to make incredible exer- 
 tions to travel faster. 
 
 " Not long after this. Captain Willie received a message 
 from the Apostle Richards. It is the custom, you know, for 
 people who want to send messages to emigrants who come 
 after them, to write a note on a scrap of paper and tie it to a 
 stone or a piece of wood and leave it on the way. No one 
 disturbs it, as no one but the emigrants travel along that 
 road, and they are sure to find it. It was from a rough post- 
 office like this that Captain Willie got his letter. In it the 
 Apostle told him that we should receive supplies from Salt 
 Lake when we reached the South Pass ; but that we knew 
 would be too late. So our allowance was again reduced, and 
 after that we were rationed at an average of ten ounces for 
 every person over ten years of age. The men who drew the 
 carts received twelve ounces, the women and aged men, nine 
 ounces, and the children from four to eight ounces according 
 to age. Before this, the men with families had done better 
 than the single men, as they had been able to save a little 
 from the children's rations, and of course they did not like 
 this new arrangement so well. 
 
 " Picture to yourself these men — in the cool air of Septem- 
 ber, drawing after them each one a loaded cart, with one or 
 more children most frequently superadded to its weight, 
 trudging wearily every day, ten, fifteen, or twenty miles over 
 the rough desert, wading across streams with the women and 
 children, setting up tents at night, working as they never 
 worked before in all their lives, and withal keeping soul and 
 body together upon twelve ounces of flour a day. This is but ' 
 one side of the picture — the physical toil and endurance of 
 the working men. Think what the feeble and aged, the sick, 
 the women and children must have endured ! 
 
 "By this time many of those who had hitherto held out 
 bravely began to fail, and the people in general were greatly 
 discouraged. Captain Willie and the Elders who assisted 
 
THE PRESENTIMENT OF APPROACHING DEATH. 221 
 
 him did their best to keep up the spirits of the people and to 
 get them over as much ground as they could each day. The 
 captains over the hundreds had also no little work to perform 
 in distributing provisions, helping the sick and infirm, and, in 
 fact, superintending everything. 
 
 "For some time the nights had been getting colder and 
 colder, and by the time we arrived at the Sweetwater river 
 we suffered considerably from that cause ; we felt that winter 
 was fast approaching. In fact, it came on earlier and more 
 severely last year tfean at any time before, since the Saints 
 settled in Utah. Does it not seem strange that at the very 
 time when they were offering up special prayers for us in 
 Zion, that we might be defended from cold and storm, the 
 terrors, of a more than ordinary winter overtook us and 
 proved fatal to so many of our company ! The mountains 
 were covered with snow, and it was soon quite evident, even 
 to those who had prophesied most loudly that the Lord would 
 work a special miracle in our behalf, that the storm-clouds of 
 winter would soon burst upon us. 
 
 " You have never seen the Sweetwater river, so I may as 
 well tell you that it is a very irregular stream, and we had to 
 cross it again and again upon our way. As usual we had to 
 wade through the water each time, and though the men 
 helped over the women and children as well as they could, 
 many of us 'got very wet indeed, and quite chilled, and we 
 were all cold and miserable. Still, our faith never gave way — 
 some, I know, began to doubt a little, but they had not yet 
 lost all faith, and discouraged and wretched, as indeed we 
 were, the greater number bore up with heroic resolution. I 
 noticed, however, on the faces of some poor souls — men and 
 women — a peculiar expression which it is quite impossible for 
 me to describe. Later on I was led to believe that at that 
 time they, perhaps unconsciously, felt the presentiment of 
 that fearful death which so soon overtook them. 
 
 " We suffered much at night. ■ You may remember that I 
 told you we were only allowed seventeen pounds of clothing 
 and bedding, and that; of course, was of little use. Sleeping 
 
222 THE GRAVES BY THE WAY-SIDE. 
 
 in a tent, under any circumstances, is not generally pleasant 
 to those who are accustomed to the shelter -of a house, but 
 sleeping in a, tent, exposed to the keen night air of the wilder- 
 ness, and with scarcely a rag of covering, was almost suffi- 
 cient to prove fatal to the stoutest and strongest. During 
 the summer time, although our fare was scanty and our labor 
 incessant, we rose each morning refreshed and strengthened 
 and ready for the toils of the day. But now we crept out of 
 our tents cramped and miserable, half-frozen, and with our 
 eyes red and tearful with the cold. We seemed to have no 
 life left in us. 
 
 "These things soon began to tell upon the health of every 
 one of us, especially upon the aged and those who were sickly, 
 Hope at last died out in their poor weary hearts. One by 
 one they fell off — utterly worn out. Poor things ! how they 
 had longed to see the promised Zion, and now all expectation 
 of peaceful rest on earth was over — the bitter end had come. 
 
 " We dug graves for them by the wayside in the desert, and 
 there we laid them with many tears, scarcely daring to look 
 one another in the face, for we felt that our own time might 
 perhaps be nearer than we thought. 
 
 " One by one at first they fell off, but before long the 
 deaths became so frequent that it was seldom that we left a 
 eamp-ground without burying one or more. This was, how- 
 ever, only the beginning of evil. 
 
 " Soon it was no longer the aged and the sickly who were 
 taken ofF, but the young and strong, who under other circum- 
 stances would have set disease and death at defiance. Cold, 
 hunger, and excessive toil brought on dysentery, and when 
 once attacked by that, there was little hope for the sufferer, 
 for we had no medicine, and it was quite out of our power to 
 give them relief in any other way. I now began to fear for 
 my husband, for I had noticed for some time an expression of 
 extreme weariness in his face. Our trials had, not hardened 
 our hea,rts ; on the contrary, I think, as death seemed to be 
 drawing near, our affection for each other grew more pure and 
 devoted, and in my heart I often prayed, that if it were His. 
 
THE BITTER END, 
 
 223 
 
 will, God would let us die together and rest in the same 
 grave. We never spoke a word to each other on this subject, 
 but we felt the more. I exerted all my strength, and day 
 after day toiled along at his side, helping him all I could ; 
 , but although he never complained, I saw in his eyes a dull 
 and heavy look which, more than any words, told of failing 
 strength and the approach of disease, and my heart sank 
 within me. 
 
 " But my own troubles did not alone engross my attention ; 
 there was too much»wretchedness around us to allow anyone 
 to be absorbed entirely in his own griefs. Acts of devotion 
 on the part of both parents and children came before me daily 
 such as would have put to shame the stories of filial and 
 parental piety which we used to be taught at school. 
 
 "I saw one poor man whose health had evidently never 
 
 been strong, draw the cart with his two little ones in it, as 
 
 well as the baggage, mile after mile, until he could hardly 
 
 drag his weary limbs a step further ; his wife carried a little 
 
 five months old baby in her bosom. This they did day after 
 
 day, until disease attacked the husband, and it was evident 
 
 that he could bear up no longer. The next morning I saw 
 
 him, pale as a corpse, bowed down, and shivering in every 
 
 limb, but still stumbling on as best he could. Before the day 
 
 was half over, the poor wife lagged behind with her babe, and 
 
 the husband did not seem to notice her. This was not the 
 
 result of heartlessness on his part ; I believe that even then 
 
 he had lost all consciousness. He did not know it, but he 
 
 was dying. Still he stumbled on, until the short wintry day 
 
 came to a close, and we pitched our camp, and then I missed 
 
 him. There was no time to enquire, and a chill came over 
 
 my heart as I thought of what might be his fate. Presently 
 
 my husband came to the tent and told me all. The poor man 
 
 had dragged the cart up to the last moment, and, when the 
 
 company halted for the night, he had turned aside, and sitting 
 
 down he bowed his head between his knees and never spoke 
 
 again. Later still, the poor wife reached the camp, and I saw 
 
 her then. There was no tear in her eyes, and she uttered 
 
224 HEROIC CONDUCT OF ELDER CHISLETT. • 
 
 neither cry nor moan, but there was upon her features a 
 terrible expression of fixed despair which I dared not even 
 look upon. 
 
 A few days after this, one morning as we were almost , 
 ready to start, I saw that poor mother in her tent, just as they 
 had- found her. She was cold and still — frozen to death — 
 her sorrows were over at last, and her poor weary spirit was 
 at rest ; but on her bosom, still clasped in her arms, and still 
 living, was her little child, unconscious of its mother's fate. 
 
 " Most of those who died, as far as I could tell, seemed to 
 pass away quietly and with little pain, as if every feeling of 
 the heart were numbed and dead. But my own sufferings 
 and fears at that time were so great that I could not be a very 
 close observer. Strange as it may seem, the fear of deatlj 
 did not so much appear to terrify these poor victims as the 
 thought that their bodies would be buried by the way-side in 
 the desert, instead of in the sacred ground of Zion. Poor 
 souls ! the absorbing passion of their life was strong in death. 
 
 "As death thinned our ranks, the labors of those who 
 survived were increased, until at last there were hardly 
 enough left with strength sufficient to pitch our tents at 
 night. A great deal devolved upon the captain of our 
 hundred, Elder Chislett. He is a very good man, and a 
 devoted Saint ; and I am glad to say that both he and a lady 
 to whom he was betrothed, and who was also with our com- 
 pany, escaped with their lives. I have often seen him, when 
 we.stopped for the night, carrying the sick and feeble on his 
 hack from the wagon to the fire, and then working harder 
 than a slave would work in putting things straight for the 
 night. He showed a great many kindnesses to my husband 
 and myself. 
 
 " But individual efforts availed nothing against fatigue and 
 hunger, and the fearful cold. To the minds of all of us, the 
 e:nd was fast approaching. Nothing but our faith sustained 
 us ; and foolish as many people would think that faith, I am 
 quite sure, that but for it, no living soul of all our company 
 would have ever reached Salt Lake. 
 
OVERTAKEN BY THE SNOW-STORM. 22^ 
 
 "At last the storm came, and the snow fell — I think it 
 must have been at least five or six inches deep within half an 
 hour. The wind was very keen and cutting, and it drifted 
 the snow right into our faces ; and thus blinded by the storm, 
 and scarcely able to stand, we stumbled on that day for fully 
 sixteen miles. What we suffered it would be useless for me 
 to attempt to describe. The Scenes we witnessed were too 
 terrible to describe. 
 
 "There was a young girl, with whom I was very well 
 acquainted, and who I saw struggling in the snow, clinging 
 to one of the hand-carts, and vainly trying to help in pushing 
 it on, but really doing just the contrary. She is now in Salt 
 Lake City, and you can see her wandering about any day 
 upon the stumps of her knees^ her limbs downwards having 
 been frozen during that storm, and subsequently amputated. 
 A poor old woman, too, who I think you must have known in 
 London, lingered behind later in the day. When night came 
 on it was impossible for any one to go back to search for her, 
 but, in the morning, not very far from the camp, some torn 
 rags — the remains of her dress— pwere found, a few bones, a 
 quantity of hair, and at a little distance a female skull, well 
 gnawed, and with the marks of the wolf fangs still wet upon 
 it ; — the snow all round was crimsoned with blood. 
 
 "We halted for a little while in the middle of that day, and 
 to our surprise and joy, Joseph A. Young and Elder Stephen 
 Taylor drove into the camp. We found that when the 
 returning missionaries, of whom I have already told you, left 
 us by the Platte river, they made their way as speedily as 
 they could to Salt Lake City. Joseph A., who felt deeply for 
 our sufferings, although he had been away from home for two 
 whole years, hastened to liis father and reported to him the 
 condition in which we were. Brigham Young was of course 
 anxious to undo the mischief which had resulted from the 
 people following his inspired counsel, and at his son's earnest 
 entreaty allowed him to return with provisions and clothing 
 to meet us. Joseph A. lost no time, but pressed on to the 
 rescue, and having told us that assistance was on the way, 
 
228 A wife's devotion : — THE ONLY CHANCE FOR LIFE. 
 
 hastened eastward to meet the company that was following 
 us. 
 
 " I cannot tell you what a relief this intelligence was to the 
 minds of all, alid how much the poor people felt encouraged 
 ' by it. But as for me, at that time my heart was sad enough. 
 For some time my husband's strength had evidently been 
 failing, and for the last two days I had felt very serious 
 apprehensions on his behalf. He had been overtasked, and 
 like the rest of us he was starving with cold and hunger, and 
 I saw that he could not hold out much longer. My worst 
 fears were speedily realised. We had not journeyed half a 
 mile from the place where we rested at noon, when, blinded 
 by the snow, and completely broken down, he dropped the 
 rail of the cart, and I saw that he could go no further. How 
 I felt, you, as a wife and mother, only can guess. In a 
 moment my own weakness was forgotten ; my love for my 
 husband made me strong again. To leave him there or to 
 delay would have been death to one if not all of us. So I 
 called to those who shared the cart with us, and they helped 
 me as well as they could to lift my husband up arid put 
 him under part of the bedding. It was the only chancd 
 of saving his life, for, as I before mentioned, some, previous 
 to this, who had been overcome, and had lingered by the way, 
 had been frozen to death or devoured by the wolves. 
 
 " I then took hold of the cross-bar or handle of the cart, 
 and numbed with the cold, and trembling in every limb, it 
 was as much as I could do to raise it from the ground. To 
 move the cart was impossible, so I appealed to the old folks 
 again, and they exerted all their strength to push it from 
 behind, and our combined efforts at length succeeded ; but th6 
 chief weight fell upon me. How gladly I bore it ; how gladly 
 I would have borne anything for the mere chance of saving 
 my dear husband's life, your own heart can tell. 
 
 " The snow drifted wildly around us, and beat in our faces 
 so blindingly that we could hardly proceed. The greater part 
 of the train had passed on while we delayed on account of my 
 husband, and now every one was ±aking the most desperate 
 
WATCHING AT NIGHT : — THE DYING AND THE DEAD. 229 
 
 efforts to keep up with the rest ; to be left behind was death. 
 Had I been asked whether under any circumstances I could 
 have dragged that heavy cart along in all that storm, I should 
 certainly have replied that it would be utterly impossible ; 
 but until we are tried we do not know what we can bear. It 
 was not until the night came on, and we pitched our tents, 
 that I realised what I had passed through. 
 
 " They helped me to carry my husband to the tent, and 
 there we laid him, and I tried to make him as easy as was 
 possible under the circumstances, but comfort or rest was 
 altogether out of the question. All that night I sat beside 
 him, sometimes watching, sometimes falling into a fitful 
 sleep. I did not believe that he would live through the 
 night. In the morning he was by no means improved, and 
 then I felt too truly the abject misery of our position. It is a 
 painful thing to watch at the bedside of those we love when 
 hope for their recovery is gone, but think what it must be to 
 sit upon the cold earth in a tent, upon the open desert, with 
 the piercing wind of winter penetrating to the very bones, 
 and there before you, the dear one — your life, your all on 
 earth — dying, and you without a drop of medicine, or even a 
 morsel of the coarsest nourishment, to give him. Oh, the 
 bitterness of my soul at th; t moment ! I tried to pray, but 
 my heart was full of cursing ; it seemed to me 9.S if even God 
 Himself had forgotten us. The fearful misery of that dark 
 hour has left on my soul itself a record as ineffaceable as the 
 imprint of a burning iron upon the flesh. 
 
 " The morning broke at last, dark and dreary, and a thick 
 heavy mantle of snow covered all the camp, but we contrived 
 to communicate with each other, and soon it was whispered 
 that five poor creatures had been found dead in the tents. 
 Want, and weariness, and the bitter cold had done their work, 
 and we did not weep for them — they were at rest ; but for 
 ourselves we wept that we were left behind — and we looked 
 at one another, wistfully, wondering which of us would be 
 taken next. 
 
 We buried those five poor frozen corpses in one grave, 
 
230 THE LAST EXTREMITY : — DESPAIR OF THE EMIGRANTS. 
 
 wrapped in the clothing in which they died, and then we com- 
 forted each other as best we might, and left the dead who 
 were now beyond our reach, that we might do what we could 
 for those who were fast following them to the grave. A 
 meeting of the leaders was held, and it was resolved that we 
 should remain where we were until the promised supplies 
 reached us. We could not, in fact, do otherwise, for the snow 
 was so deep that it was impossible for us to proceed, and the 
 sick and dying demanded immediate attention. That morn- 
 ing, for the first time, no flour was distributed — there was 
 none. All that remained, besides our miserable cattle, was a 
 small quantity of hard biscuit which Captain Willie bought at 
 Laramie, and a few pounds of rice and dried apples. Nearly 
 all the biscuit was at once divided among the whole company, 
 and the few pounds which remained, together with the rice and 
 apples, were given to Elder Chislett for the use of the sick 
 and the very little children. They also killed two of the cat- 
 tle and divided the beef. Most of the people got through 
 their miserable allowance that very morning, and then they 
 had to fast. 
 
 " Captain Willie set out that morning with another Elder to 
 meet the coming supplies and hasten them on, and ^s we saw 
 them disappear in the distant west we almost felt as if our last 
 hope departed with them, so many chances there were that we 
 should never see them again. 
 
 " The whole gi that long, long day I sat beside my husband 
 in the tent — and I might almost say I did no more. There 
 was nothing that I could do. The little bedding that was al- 
 lowed for both of us I made up into a couch for him ; but 
 what a wretched make-shift it was ! And I got from Elder 
 Chislett a few of the dried apples which had been reserved for 
 the sick ; but it was not until nightfall that my husband was 
 capable of swallowing anything — and then, what nourishment 
 to give to a sick man ! The day was freezingly cold, and I 
 had hardly anything on me, and had eaten nothing since the 
 day before ; for my mind was sq agitated that I do not think 
 the most delicate food would have tempted me. God alone 
 
"OH GOD, MV GOD, LET ME DIe!" 23 1 
 
 knows the bitterness of my heart as I sat there during all that 
 weary day. I never expected to see my husband open his 
 eyes again, and I thought that when evening came I would 
 lie down beside him and we would take our last long sleep on 
 earth together. 
 
 " When night came on and all was dark I still sat there ; I 
 dreaded to move lest I should learn the terrible truth — my 
 husband dead ! I looked towards the place where I knew he 
 was lying, but I could see nothing. I listened, and I fancied 
 that I heard a gentle breathing — but it was only fancy. Then, 
 louder than the incessant moaning of the wind, I could hear in 
 the distance a fearful cry — a cry which had often chilled our 
 hearts at midnight on the plains — it was the wolves ! The 
 darkness grew darker still — so thick that one could almost 
 feel it ; the horror of death seemed stealing over all my senses. 
 Oh that there might be one long eternal night to blot out for 
 ever our miseries and our existence. I threw my hands 
 wildly above me and cried bitterly : ' Oh God, my God, let me 
 die r 
 
 " God was nearer to me than I thought. As my hand dropped 
 lifelessly to the ground it touched some moving thing — it was 
 my husband's hand — the same hand which I had watched in 
 the twilight, stiffening, as I thought, in death. The long, thin 
 fingers grasped my own, and though they were very, very cold, 
 I felt that life was in them ; and as I stooped down to kiss 
 them I heard my husband's voice, very weak and feeble, say- 
 ing in a whisper — " Mary." I threw myself upon his bosom. 
 In a moment the fear of death — the longing for death — the 
 wild and terrible thoughts, all had gone ; — the sound of that 
 voice was life to me, and forgetful of his weakness, forgetful 
 of everything but him, I threw myself upon his bosom and 
 wept tears of joy. 
 
 " Very carefully and gently I raised him up, and, in the 
 darkness, every whispered word conveyed more meaning to 
 my mind than all his eloquence in by-gone times. After some 
 time I persuaded him to take a little nourishment — miserable 
 stuff that it was — and presently he fell asleep again. I laid his 
 
232 TERRIBLE SCENES IN THE CAMP. 
 
 dear-head upon the best pillow that I could make of some of 
 my own clothes, and then I slept a little myself— not much, 
 but it was more refreshing than any sleep that had visited my 
 eyes for long time past — hope had come again. 
 
 " The next morning my husband was evidently better, and 
 I knelt down beside him and thanked God for the miracle that 
 He had wrought ; for was it not a miracle thus to raise my 
 dead to life again ? How many stronger, stouter men than he 
 had I seen fall sick and die ; but to me God had shown mercy 
 in my utmost need. 
 
 " We waited three long days for the return of Captain Wil- 
 lie. My heart was so full of thankfulness that my husband 
 had been spared that I certainly did not feel so acutely the 
 misery with which I was surrounded as I otherwise should 
 have done ; I- was like the prisoner who feels happy in a re- 
 prieve from death, but whose situation is nevertheless such as 
 would appear to any other person the most wretched in which 
 he could be placed. The misery that was suffeired in that 
 camp was beyond the power of words to describe. On the 
 second day they gave us some more beef-rations, but they did 
 us little good. The beef was, of course, of the poorest, and, 
 eaten alone, it did not seem to satisfy hunger, and those who 
 were prostrated by dysentery, although they ate it ravenously, 
 suffered much in consequence afterwards. 
 
 " The number of the sick rapidly increased, and not a few 
 died from exhaustion ; and really those seemed happiest who 
 were thus taken from the horrors Which surrounded fhem. 
 Had it not been for the intense frost, we should all probably 
 have fallen victims to the intolerable atmosphere of the camp. 
 I would not even allow my mind to recall some of the scenes 
 which I witnessed at that time : scenes, the disgusting and 
 filthy horrors of which, no decent words pould describe. 
 When you consider the frightful condition in which we were, 
 the hunger and cold which we endured, you may perhaps be 
 able in a small degree to conjecture — as far as a person can 
 conjecture who has not himself suffered such things — ^what we 
 then passed through. I saw poor miserable creatures, utterly 
 
HELP IN TIME OF NEED. 233 
 
 ■worn out, dying in the arms of other forlorn and hopeless 
 creatures as wretched as themselves ; I saw strong and honest, 
 honorable men, or who had once been such, begging of the 
 captain for the miserable scraps which had been saved for the 
 sick and the helpless children ; I saw poor heart-broken 
 mothers freezing to death, but clasping as they died, in an 
 agony of loving woe, the torn and wretched remnants of cloth- 
 ing which they still retained, around the emaciated forms of 
 their innocent babes — the mother-instinct strong in death ; 
 and sometimes at night when, all unbidden, I see again in 
 dreams the awful sufferings of those poor God-forsaken 
 wretches, I start in horror and pray the Almighty rather 
 to blot out from my mind the memory of all the past, 
 than to let me ever recollect, if but in fancy, that fearful 
 time. 
 
 " The third day came, and still no relief. ' There are mys- 
 terious powers of endurance in human nature, weak as we 
 often deem it, but there is a point beyond which the bow, 
 however flexible, will not bend. It was evident that if no help 
 arrived speedily, the end was not far off. 
 
 " The sun was sinking behind the distant western hills, in 
 all the glory of the clear frosty atmosphere of the desert, and 
 many who gazed upon its beauty did so with a mournful inter- 
 est, believing that they would never again behold the light of 
 day. But at that moment some who were anxiously watching 
 with a last hope — watching for what they hardly dared expect 
 to see — raised a shout of joy. We knew what it was ! Men, 
 women, and children rushed from their tents to welcome the 
 approaching wagons and our friends in time of need. Captain 
 Willie and the other Elder had found the rescue from Salt ' 
 Lake overtaken by the storm just as we were, but he had told 
 them of our terrible situation, and they had hastened on with- 
 out a moment's delay. It was he and they, convoying good 
 supplies, who now approached us. The poor creatures shouted 
 wildly for joy, even the strong men shed tears, and the sisters, 
 overcome with the sudden change from death to life, flung 
 themselves into the arms of the brethren as they came into 
 
234 DISTRIBUTING THE SUPPLIES. 
 
 the camp and covered them with kisses. Such happiness you 
 never saw— everyone shaking hands and speaking joyfully — 
 everyone saying ' God bless you ' with a meaning such as is 
 sddom attached to those words. 
 
 " The supplies were to us more than food and clothing — 
 they were life itself. Elder John Chislett was appointed to 
 distribute the provisions and clothing, and everything was 
 placed in his hands. He gave out to us all what was imme- 
 diately necessary, but strongly cautioned us to be very moder- 
 ate in what we ate, as it was dangerous to go from the 
 extreme of fasting to a full meal. After supper, the clothing 
 and bedding was fairly divided, and we felt more thankful for 
 those little comforts than a person, who had never endured as 
 we had, would have felt had he become suddenly the recipient 
 of boundless luxury. 
 
 " Two of the Elders who had held forth such delusive hopes 
 to the company, not long before, as I have already told you, 
 were with the brethren who came to our relief. I have never 
 ventured to ask how it was that they could hold out to us in 
 God's name such promises, when they must have known, after 
 a moment's reflection, that they were utterly baseless, but I 
 think that probably they left their comfortable homes in Salt 
 Lake City and came across the stormy desert with supplies to 
 meet us, only to show practically how anxious they were to 
 atone for having led us astray. Next morning Elder Grant 
 went on east to meet the company following us, but Elder 
 W. H. Kimball took command of our company for the rest of 
 the way. 
 
 "We could now journey but very slowly, for the road was 
 bad, the sick and weakly were, however, able to ride, and 
 altogether we suffered less. To some this change for the 
 better arrived too late — the mental and physical sufferings 
 which they had endured were too much for them. Poor souls ! 
 they alone and their Father in heaven knew what they had 
 passed through. They seemed to have lost all consciousness, 
 as if their faculties had been numbed and stultified. We 
 talked to them of the past, but they looked at us with unmean- 
 
"TOO LATE — TOO LATE!" 235 
 
 ing eyes, as if we spoke of something in which they had no in- 
 terest ; we tried to lead their thoughts to Zion, and the pro- 
 mises of the Lord ; but it was all in vain. They turned from 
 us with a look of terrible apathy ; and one or two, who partly 
 seemed to understand, only replied with an indifference pain- 
 ful to witness — " too late, too late !" 
 
 " As we journeyed, the weather every day grew colder : 
 Many of the unfortunate people lost their fingers and toes, 
 others their ears ; one poor woman lost her sight, and I was 
 told of a poor sick jnan who held on to the wagon-bars to save 
 himself from jolting and had all his fingers frozen off. Few, 
 if any, of the people recovered from the effects of that frost. 
 One morning they found a poor old man who had vainly tried 
 the evening before to keep up with the rest. His corpse was 
 hot far from the camp, but it had been sadly mangled by the 
 wolves. Then there came another snow-storm, only worse in 
 proportion as the weather was colder, and it was with the ut- 
 most difficulty that we could be kept from freezing. We 
 wrapped blankets and anything else we could get around us, 
 but the cold wind penetrated to our very bones. I was told 
 that some of the people, even women and children who lagged 
 behind were whipped so as to make them keep up, and to keep 
 life in them. I did not see this myself, but I believe, if the 
 story was true, it was an act of mercy and not of cruelty, for to 
 delay a moment was fatal.. The captain of our hundred, more 
 than once stayed behind the company to bury some unfortun- 
 ate person who died on the road : how he ever got up with us 
 again I cannot tell, but he seemed to be as indefatigable in his 
 labors as he was wonderfully preserved. 
 
 "Sometimes the carts came to a dead stand-still, and 
 several had to be fastened together and drawn by a united 
 effort, and in more than one instance the poor people gave up 
 altogether ; — they were carried on, while they lived, as well as 
 we could ; but their carts were abandoned. The stragglers 
 came in slowly to camp the night of the storm ; — the people 
 from the Valley even went back to fetch some in ; and it was 
 nearly six o'clock in the morning before the last arrived 
 
23(5 FIFTEEN BURIED IN ONE GRAVE. 
 
 " The next day we remained in camp, for there were so 
 many sick and dying that we could not proceed. Early in 
 the morning, Elder Chislett and three other Elders went 
 round to see who was dead, that they might be buried. They 
 found in the tents fifteen corpses— all stiff and frozen. Two 
 more died during the day. A large square hole was dug and 
 they were buried in it three abreast, and then they were 
 covered with leaves and earth, every precaution being taken 
 to keep them from the wolves. Few of the relatives of those 
 who were dead came to the burial-— they did not seem to care 
 — death had become familiar to them, and personal misery 
 precluded sorrow for the dead. 
 
 " As we drew nearer to Salt Lake Valley we met more of 
 the brethren coming to our assistance. They supplied us with 
 all we needed, and then hastened on to meet those who 
 followed us. The atmosphere seemed to become sensibly 
 warmer, and our sufferings were proportionately less as we 
 approached Zion. 
 
 " What the feelings of others might have been when they 
 first saw the goal of our hopes — Zion of our prayers and 
 songs — I cannot tell. Weary, Oh, so weary I felt, but thank- 
 ful, more than thankful that my husband's life had been 
 spared. He was pale and sick, but he was with me still. 
 
 "I have written too much already. Sister Stenhouse. I 
 cannot tell you more now, but I may as well add that when 
 we left Iowa City we were about five hundred in all. Some 
 left us on the way. When we left Florence and began the 
 journey across the Plains we were over four hundred and 
 twenty, of which number we buried sixty-seven — a sixth of, 
 the whole. The company which followed us, and to which I 
 have frequently alluded, fared worse than we. They num- 
 bered six hundred when they started, but they buried one 
 hundred and fifty on the journey — one in every four. May 
 God grant that I may never again see such a sight as was 
 presented by the miserable remnant of that last company as 
 they came on slowly through the Canon towards Salt Lake; 
 Valley." 
 
CHAPTER XVII. 
 
 WE FORSAKE ALL, AND SET OUT FOR' ZTON:— OUR JOURNEY 
 ACROSS THE PLAINS. 
 
 Considering Our Position — Doubts and Fears — A Visit from the Apostle Geo. 
 Q. Cannon — We are "Counselled" to Emigrate — Giving up All for the 
 Church — Taking Charge of the Emigrants — The Insignificance of Women — 
 Wives are Never to Follow their own Judgment — "Be Obedient" — We Begin 
 oui; pilgrimage — The Perpetual Emigration Fund — How' Mormon Emigration 
 is Managed — Settling the Debts of a Lady-Love — How Certain Imprudent 
 Englishmen Have Suffered — The "Emigration" of Miss Blank — An Ancient 
 "Sister" who was Forced to Wait — Living Contradictions — First Glimpse of 
 Salt Lake City — ^A Glorious Panorama — The Spectre of My Existence — The' 
 Prison- Walls of the Mountains — Without Hope — Life in the Wagons — 
 Search for a House — " Roughing It" in Zion — First Impressions — A Cheer- 
 less Prospect for Winter — Daniel H. Wells Promises Assistance — A Wofuli 
 Spectacle of Tallow Candles^Odorous Illumination — " L'JSglise c'est moi" — 
 "An, Ugly Man With a Cast in His. Eye" — An Awkward Mistake— Begin- 
 ning Life in Zion. 
 
 IT was with strange feelings of doubt and unrest that I read 
 that painful story ; but I folded up Mary Burton's letter 
 and stored it carefully away in my desk, and then I began to 
 think. 
 
 Certainly I was still a Mormon — at least I was nothing- 
 else — but I was not now so firmly grounded in my faith as once 
 I was, and these terrible stories completely unsettled my 
 mind. Then, too, I was well aware that, before long, my 
 husband and myself would be called upon to cross the Plains 
 to Zion, and I felt that if our experience were anything like 
 that of Mary Burton, I and my children would never reach 
 Salt Lake. The prospect was not very cheering. 
 IS 
 
238 WE RECEIVE MARCHING ORDERS. 
 
 One morning we were surprised to receive a visit from the 
 Apostle George Q. Cannon who informed us that he had 
 received letters from Utah and had come to take the place of 
 Mr. Stenhouse as President of the Mission in the Eastern 
 States, and that we might now prepare to travel with the 
 next company of emigrants. 
 
 To me this was most unpleasant intelligence. Polygamy, — 
 the knowledge that before long I should be brought person- 
 ally within its degrading influence, — had now for years been 
 the curse of my life, and I had welcomed every reprieve from 
 immediate contact with it in Utah. But the time had come 
 at last when I was to realise my worst apprehensions, and I 
 think at that time, had I been permitted to choose, I would 
 have preferred to die rather than journey to Zion. Besides 
 this, ever since my husband had been engaged with the 
 secular papers, we had been getting along very comfortably. 
 We had now a pleasant home and many comforts and little 
 luxuries which we had not enjoyed since we left Switzerland, 
 and I was beginning to hope that we should be allowed to 
 remain in New York for a few years at least. We had also 
 by this time six children — the youngest only a few days old — 
 and I leave it to any mother to determine whether I had not 
 good cause for vexation when I was told that we were 
 expected to leave New York within two weeks with the 
 emigrants who were then en rotite from England. My hus- 
 band also was to take charge of the company, and therefore 
 everything would depend upon me — all the preparations for 
 our long and perillous journey, the disposal of our furniture, 
 and, in fact, the thousand and one little necessary duties 
 which must attend the packing up and departure of a family. 
 
 In the course of a few days the emigrants arrived, and then 
 my husband was compelled to devote ^11 his time to them. 
 When I told the Elders that it was almost impossible for me, 
 in the delicate state of health in which I was, and with a babe 
 only two weeks old, to undertake such a journey, -they told 
 me that I had no faith in the power of God, and that if I 
 would arise and begin my preparations, the Lord would give 
 
wives MAY NOT JUDGE FOR THEMSELVES. 239 
 
 me strength according to my day. Thinking that probably 
 my husband believed as they did, I made the effort, but it 
 cost me much. In the Mormon Church the feelings or 
 sufferings of women are never considered. If an order is 
 given to any man to take a journey or perform any given task, 
 his wife or wives are never thought of. They are his prop- 
 erty just as much as his horses, mules, or oxen, and if one wife 
 should die, it is of little consequence, if he has others, and if 
 he has not he can easily get them ; and if he is not young or 
 fascinating enough, to win his way with the young ladies, he 
 has only to keep on good terms with Brigham Young, or even 
 with his bishop, and every difficulty will be smoothed away, 
 and they will be " counselled" to marry him. 
 
 It is never expected, nor would it be tolerated in any Mor- 
 mon woman that she should exercise her own judgment in 
 opposition to her husband, no matter how much she might 
 feel that he was in the wrong : I have frequently seen intel- 
 ligent women subjected to the grossest tyranny on the part of 
 ignorant and fanatical husbands who were influenced by the 
 absurd teachings of the Tabernacle. One of the greatest 
 
 Mormon writers has said : 
 
 • 
 
 " The "wife should never follow her own judgment in preference to that of her 
 husband ; for if her husband desires to do right, but errs in judgment, the Lord 
 will bless her in endeavoring to carry out his counsels ; for God has placed him 
 at the head, and though he may err in judgment, yet God will not justify the 
 wife in disregarding his instructions and counsels ; far greater is the sin of 
 rebellion, than the errors which arise from the want of judgment ; therefore she 
 would be condemned for suffering her will to arise against his. Be obedient, and 
 God will cause all things to work for good." 
 
 The trouble and annoyance occasioned by leaving a com- 
 fortable position in New York to travel to such an unknown 
 region as Utah was then, was not a trifle ; but we hastened 
 our preparations, sacrificing all that we possessed, in the most 
 reckless manner, and in due time set out. 
 
 When we reached Florence — the starting-point on the 
 Frontiers — we were detained on account of some mismanage- 
 ment on the part of the Church Agents, and remained for 
 three weeks in camp. Ours was what was called " an inde- 
 
24Q THE EMIGRATION OF MISS BI,AJfK. 
 
 pendent company" ; by which, I mean that we were able tp 
 defray our own expenses without borrowing from the Church: 
 the poorer emigrants were assisted from a fund provided for 
 that purpose — the Perpetual Emigration Fund. More than 
 twenty years ago contributions were levied on the more 
 wealthy Saints for the purpose of providing the passage, 
 outfit, &c., of those who could not otherwise have " gathered 
 to Zion." It was not, however, intended that a free passage 
 should be provided ; those who had a little money were, 
 assisted, and then, after all, they had to make good to the. 
 last farthing, with interest, what they had borrowed from the, 
 fund. I have known many people who contributed very 
 largely, and it was represented constantly as the duty of all 
 to do so. 
 
 Men who contemplate entering into the patriarchal order 
 of matrimony, if they are Americans, generally try to discover 
 whether the "emigration" of their lady-love has been "settled 
 for," and if their investigations end unfavorably the result, 
 very frequently is that their devotion is turned into another 
 channel and some . other maiden whose expenses have been 
 fully paid bears off the palm. Englishmen have not always 
 been quite so prudent, and some have married a<;cording to 
 their own sweet fancy without asking a question, and to their 
 dismay, not long after the wedding, an account has been sent 
 in for the emigration of Miss Blank. , Others, again, have not 
 been allowed to marry the lady of their choice until she was 
 first paid for, and if the old man was very much in love, this 
 was a quick way of getting the account settled. The Mormqn 
 Church never gives, it only lends to the poor. Many a man 
 and woman has given enough to have emigrated himself or 
 herself over and over again. This was because they were old 
 people, and it was the young girls and young people generally 
 who received the benefits of the fund: Many years ago a 
 poor old widow woman in England said . to me : " I have 
 nearly starved myself to contribute all that I could to the. 
 emigration fund, in hopes that I should have the privilege of 
 going to Zion and mingling with the chosen people of God, 
 
THEN AND NOW. 24I 
 
 but every season the young girls are all picked out of our 
 branch, and I am told to wait. I cannot think that this is 
 right, but I don't wish to judge the actions of God's servants. 
 I suppose I must wait." 
 
 She did wait, and died waiting. 
 
 Our company was in an infinitely better position than that 
 of those emigrEtnts of whose sad fate my friend Mary Burton 
 had told me ; for our journey was made at the proper season, 
 and as far as was possible under the circumstances, conven- 
 ience and comfort jiad been attended to. The incidents which 
 befell us were few, and although, of course, every one of us 
 ;felt weary and worn out, Tve were not called 'upon to pass 
 through the miseries and sufferings endured by the hand-cart 
 emigrants. Looking back to our primitive mode of travelling, 
 it appears to me almost as if I must be making some mistake 
 about my own age, and that it must have been several centuries, 
 instead of a few years ago, since we crossed the plains. The 
 ox-team and wagon, the walk on foot in the day and the 
 ■camp life at night have been pleasantly exchanged for the 
 swift travel of a few days in a Pullman palace-car. 
 
 What living cdntradictions we were as we crossed the 
 Plains — singing ih a circle, night and morning, the songs of 
 Zion and listening to prayers and thanksgivings for having 
 been permitted to gather out of Babylon, and then during the 
 'day as we trudged along in twos and threes expressing to 
 each other all our misgivings, and doubts, and fears, and the 
 bitterness of our thoughts against Polygamy ; while each wife, 
 confiding in her husband's honor and faithfulness, solaced 
 herself with the hope that all might yet be well. How little 
 sometimes do the songs of gladness reflect the real sentiments 
 ■of 'the heart. How oftdn have I heard many a poor heart- 
 'broken woman singing the chorus : 
 
 " I never knew what joy was 
 Till I became a Mormon." 
 
 I never could sing that song, for my experience 'had been 
 Exactly -the reverse. 
 
242 FIRST IMPRESSIONS OF SALT LAKE CITY. 
 
 It was the month of September— the beginning of our 
 beautiful Indian summer— when we emerged from the canon, 
 and caught sight of Salt Lake City. Everything looked green 
 and lovely, and in spite of all my sad forebodings while cross- 
 ing the Plains, I involuntarily exclaimed, " Ah, what a glorious 
 spot !" It looked like a beautiful garden — another Eden — in 
 the midst of a desert valley. We had a glimpse of the Great 
 Salt Lake far away in the distance, stretching out like a placid 
 sheet of molten silver, while everywhere around were the 
 lonely-looking snow-capped mountains, encircling us like 
 mighty prison-walls. 
 
 It would be impossible for me to describe my feelings at 
 that time. Even while I was enchanted with the glorious 
 prospect before me, there arose again in my mind that haunt- 
 ing spectre of my existence — Polygamy. I believed that this 
 little earthly paradise would probably be to me and my 
 daughters after me, a prison-house, and with a mother's in- 
 stinct I shuddered as I thought of what they might be des- 
 tined to suffer there. Lovely as the scene was, there was a 
 fatal shadow overhanging it all. Then, too, there was no es- 
 cape : if the sad forebodings of my heart were realised, it 
 would be utterly impossible for us ever to get away. The 
 idea of a railway being constructed across those desert plains 
 and rocky mountains never for a moment entered my mind, 
 and even had I thought it possible, I should have supposed 
 that it would take a life -time to complete. No, there was no 
 help for me, even if it came to the worst. I felt that my doom 
 was sealed ; and there were many women in our company who 
 thought just the same as I did and who were troubled at heart 
 with fears as sad as mine. 
 
 My first impressions of Salt Lake City when we began life 
 there were anything but pleasant^ — we had to "rough it." 
 For nearly two weeks we were obliged to remain in our wagons, 
 as it was quite impossible to obtain house-room. At that time 
 each family built their own little hut, and there were no 
 vacant houses to let. 
 
 The weather was now growing very cold and wintry, and it 
 
A CHEERFUL HOUSE FOR WINTER TIME f 243 
 
 was absolutely necessary that we should have some better 
 shelter than the wagons afforded. One day my husband told 
 me, when he came home, that he had been offered a house 
 which belonged to the Church. It was in a very dilapidated 
 condition, he said, but that if I would go and look at it with 
 him, we could then decide about taking it. No time was to 
 be lost, for companies of emigrants were coming in almost 
 daily, and if we neglected this chance we might not find 
 another. 
 
 When we arrived at the house I was much discouraged at 
 seeing the condition it was in : the window panes were all 
 cracked or broken out, the floors and walls looked as if they 
 had never known soap or paint, and the upper rooms had no 
 ceilings ; in fact it was not fit for any civilised Christian to 
 live in. In point of size there was nothing to complain of, 
 but of comfort or convenience there was none, — the wind 
 whistled through every door and every cracked window ; and 
 altogether it presented anything but a cheering prospect for 
 winter. 
 
 My husband told me that Daniel H. Wells, who was super- 
 intendent of Church property and also one of the First 
 Presidency of the Church, had promised him that if we took 
 the house it should be repaired and made fit for living in, be- 
 fore winter fully set in ; and under the circumstances we 
 thought we could do no better than accept his offer. 
 
 Thus we began housekeeping in Utah, and we unpacked 
 our trunks and tried to give the place as home-like an Appear- 
 ance as we possibly could. I had known what it was to be in 
 a strange country and destitute ; and, therefore, benefiting by 
 experience, when I left New York, regardless of the teachings 
 of the Elders and of my own husband's directions to the con- 
 trary, I had secretly stowed away many little necessaries 
 towards housekeeping. Indeed, had I not done so, we should 
 have been as badly off when we reached Zion as when we ar- 
 rived in New York. Besides which, I have no doubt that our 
 wagons would have been filled with the trunks of those very 
 brethren who counselled us not to take more than was abso- 
 
244 HOUSE-KEEPING IN A SMALL WAY. 
 
 lutely necessary. The brethren who gave this counsel were, 
 I noticed, constantly purchasing while they advised every- 
 one else to sell, and I thought it wiser to follow their exampfe 
 than their precepts. 
 
 Among my treasures was some cairpet, and when that was 
 laid down and the stove put up we began to feel almost at 
 ' home. The wind, however, soon , drove away all thoughts of 
 comfort, fdr it came whistling in through a thousand undetec- 
 ted crevices, and the tallow candles which we were obliged to 
 burn presented a woful spectacle. Even the most wealthy, 
 then, had no other light but candles, and every family had to 
 make their own : I have often seen people burning a little 
 melted grease with a bit of cotton-rag stuck in the middle 
 for a wick — how pleasant the smell, and how brilliant the light 
 thus produced can be imagined. Everything was upon the 
 same scale — and to keep house in any fashion was really a 
 formidable undertaking, especially to those who had been ac- 
 customed to the conveniences of large towns. I believe, that 
 many women consented to their husbands taking other wives 
 for the sake of getting some assistance in their home duties. 
 
 We spent nearly all the first evening in our new house in 
 trying to discover :Some means of keeping out the storm, 
 but to little purpose. Nearly a fortnight passed before any one 
 came to see about repairing the house, but as it belonged to the 
 Church my husband seemed to think it must all be right. 
 The Mormon men are always very lenient towards "the 
 Church " — very much more so than the Mormon women, for 
 the latter have somehow got mixed up in their minds the idea 
 that Brigham Young and "the Church" are synonymous 
 terms. I remember one day a good young sister — a daughter 
 of one of the twelve Apostles — saying to me, " I have just seen 
 the Church," and when I asked her what she meant, she saidi 
 " I have just met Brigham Young and Hyram Clawson, and 
 are they not the Church ?" It was evident tp me that others 
 besides myself sometimes gave way to wicked thoughts. 
 Nevertheless I was still of opinion that " the ChurcJi " bad 
 plenty of money and ought to have repaired the house. 
 
"AN UGLY MAN WITH A CAST IN HIS EYE." 245 
 
 One day a man whom I had never seen before, called, upon 
 me and asked what repairs I should like done. I was not 
 feeling very well, and had been annoyed at the delay, and I 
 answered rather ungraciously that I should like anything done, 
 if only it were done at once, for I thought we had waited long 
 enough. He answered me very politely and said that he would 
 see to it immediately. When Mr. Stenhouse returned home 
 in the evening he said : " So you have had a visit from Presi- 
 dent Wells." " No," I said, " there has been no one here but 
 a carpenter — an ugly man with a cast in his eye, and I told 
 him that I wanted the house fixed right away." 
 
 " Why, that was President Wells," he said, very much 
 shocked, and I think I felt as bad as he did when I realised 
 that I had treated one of the " First Presidency " so uncere- 
 moniously. 
 
 This Daniel H. Wells, besides being an Apostle, a Counsel- 
 lor of Brigham Young, and one of the three " Presidents " 
 who share with Brigham the first position in the Church, and 
 are associated with him in all his official acts, was Lieutenant- 
 General of the Nauvoo Legion, and at the present time and 
 for some years past, Mayor of Salt Lake City. It was a 
 shocking indiscretion, to say the least, to speak slightingly of 
 such a high and mighty personage. 
 
 The repairs, however, were seen to, and the house rendered 
 a little more habitable. We had now to begin the struggle of 
 life afresh and could not afford to be too particular about 
 trifles ; — to obtain shelter was something — ^for the rest we 
 must still continue to hope and trust. 
 
CHAPTER XVIII. 
 
 MY FIRST IMPRESSIONS OF THE CITY OF THE SAINTS. 
 
 Some Personal Observations — An Innocent Prophet — Living Witnesses of the 
 Truth — How Salt Lake City was Laid Out and Built — TheHouses of Many- 
 Wived Men — My First Sunday in the Tabernacle — Curious Millinery of Lady- 
 Saints — Two Remarkable Young Ladies — A Doubtful Experiment — How 
 Service is Conducted in the Tabernacle — Extraordinary Sermons — Deceitful 
 Dealings of the Original Propliet — Why Joseph, the " Seer," Married Miss 
 Snow — Another of the Prophet's Wives — A Shameful Story — Aunty Shearer, 
 and her Funny Ways — Spiritual Wives and Proxy Wives — How the Saints 
 are Married for Time and for Eternity — Concerning Certain Generous Elders 
 — How Wives are Secretly " Sealed " — Extraordinary Request of One of 
 Brigham's Wives — "The Next Best Thing "—Mormon Ideas of the Marriage 
 at C ana — The "Fixins" of a Mormon Husband — How "The Kingdom" is 
 Built Up — Women Only to be Saved by Their Husbands — A Painful Story— 
 A Very Cautious Woman — A Woman Who Wanted to be "Queen" — A 
 Deceitful Lover — A Strange Home-Picture — "These Constitute My King- 
 dom " — Forebodings. 
 
 WITH the eager observation of a woman who has a great 
 personal interest at stake, I took note of everything in 
 Zion which was new to me, and especially all that related to 
 the system of plural marriages, and all my worst fears were 
 abundantly realised. 
 
 Although I had looked at the dark side of Mormonism and 
 had pictured witk horror the life of women in Polygamy, there 
 were nevertheless some truths which broke upon my mind with 
 painful effect. In England we had heard so frequently from 
 the lips of the Apostles and Elders that not only was Poly- 
 gamy contrary to the teachings of Joseph Smith, but that it 
 was utterly unknown in Nauvoo during the Prophet's life- 
 
THE CITY OF THE SAINTS. 247 
 
 time. Directly' the Revelation was published, we, ,of course, 
 knew that if it really proceeded from Joseph he could not 
 have been so innocent of Polygamy as we had been taught ; 
 but I was hardly prepared to meet several of his wives out in 
 Utah ; and yet almost the first thing that I heard was that 
 there were living in Salt Lake City, ladies well-known and 
 respected, who had been sealed to the Prophet. This I after- 
 wards found was true. 
 
 The Mormon Colony in Salt Lake City had at first to 
 qontend with all those difficulties and submit to all those 
 privations which beset the path of all new settlers in a strange 
 country. Until very recently the greater number of the 
 dwellings were small and low, like so many little huts, and 
 not infrequently you might see a row of these huts, with one 
 window and a door to each, and, inside, a wife, a bedstead, 
 two chairs and a table — with poverty to crown the whole. 
 But even then might be seen in the laying out of the streets, 
 and in the other arrangements, the germs of a great city. 
 The roadways were broad and the sidewalks convenient, and 
 provision was made — more with an eye to the future than to 
 present necessity — for a great depth in the measurement of 
 the houses and blocks. Down the sides of the streets flowed 
 a sparkling stream — the water of which was brought from the 
 mountains for the purpose of irrigating the gardens in the 
 city ; and, as far as they possibly could, the settlers marked 
 out and planned a capital worthy of that name for the Mor- 
 mon people. 
 
 When I arrived in Salt Lake City, a great many improve- 
 ments had been effected ; and expecting, as I did, that this 
 would be our future home for many years, perhaps for life, I 
 was interested in everything that I saw. But even then, in 
 merely taking a walk about the city, I met with evidences of 
 the degrading teachings of Polygamy — I saw that little defer- 
 ence was paid to the women, they were rudely jostled at the 
 crossings, and seemed to be generally uncared for. Since the 
 completion of the railway and the consequent influx of 
 Gentiles, this, of course, has not been noticeable. 
 
248 PROPHET ! WHAT OF THE FUNDS ? 
 
 The city is built on a sldpe formed by a bend in the 
 mountain-range. Brigham Young's house is on the northern 
 'Side, and has a commanding prospect. The Tabernacle and 
 tithing-'office are in thfe same street. The Tabernacle is a 
 plain-looking building entirely devoid of any architectural 
 beauty. It stands in the block where the Temple, which has 
 been building for the last quarter of a century, and is now 
 only a few feet above ground, is waiting to be finished. 
 Nearly twenty-six years ago, Brigham wrote to Orson Spencer, 
 the President of the Mormon Church in England, urging him 
 to " gather up as much tithing as he possibly could, for glass, 
 nails, paint, &c., to assist in building up the Temple of the 
 Lord in the Valley of the Great Salt Lake." A large sunj of 
 money was collected, and millions have been raised by tithing 
 and by other means, but there has been no one hitherto with 
 courage and authority sufficient to demand of the Prophet an 
 account of those funds, and the interest and compound interest 
 which should be accruing thereunto. 
 
 The first Sunday I went to the Tabernacle I was greatly 
 amused at the way in which some of the sisters were dressed. 
 Quite a number wore sun-bonnets, but the majority wore 
 curious and diverse Specimens of the milliner's art — relics of 
 •former days. Some wore a little tuft of gauze and feather's 
 on tiie top of the head, while othe!rs had helmets of extraor- 
 dinary size. There were little bbnnets, half-grown bonnets, 
 and "grandmother bonnets " with steeple crowns and fronts 
 so large that it was difficult to get a peep at the faces which 
 they concealed. As for the dresses, they were as diversified 
 as the bonnets. Some of them presented a rathd: curious 
 spectacle. I noticed two young women who sat near me : 
 they . were dressed alike in green calico sun-bonnets, green 
 calico skirts, and pink 'calico sacks. On enquiring who they 
 ■were, I was told that they were the wives of one man arid 
 had both %eeh matried to him on the same day, so that 
 neither could claim precedence -of the. other. Outside of 
 Utah such a thing would seem impossible, but so many of the 
 young girls at that time came out to Zion Without father ot 
 
INSIDE THE TABERNACL5 :--THE SERVICES. AND SAfflJTS. 251 
 
 tpother or any one else to guide them, and left to their own 
 inexperience and afraid to disobey "counsel" it is no wonder 
 that they soon yielded to the universal custom. 
 
 The two young women whom I have mentioned, did not 
 appear to me to be overburdened with intelligence; they 
 looked like girls who could be made to believe anything ; but 
 after that I met with two well-educated women who, like these 
 foolish girls, thoughtlessly tried the experiment of two or 
 more marrying the^ same man on the same day, — agreeing 
 with their "lord" that^^that would be the best way to preserve 
 peace in their household. But they were terribly mistaken, 
 and even before the marriage-day was over, the poor bewild- 
 ered husband had to fly to brother Brigham for counsel. 
 
 The Tabernacle services seemed to me as strange as the 
 women. There was no regular order in conducting the pro- 
 ceedings, but the prominent brethren made prayers, or " ser- 
 mons " as they were called upon to do so. The " sermons " would 
 be more properly called speeches — they were nothing but a 
 rambling, disconnected glorification of the Saints, interspersed 
 with fearful denunciations of the Gentiles, and not infre- 
 quently a good sprinkling of words and expressions such as 
 are never used in decent society. More unedifying discourses 
 could hardly be imagined. As for the spirituality and devo- 
 tional feeling which characterised our meetings in England, 
 they were only conspicuous by their absence, and many 
 devout Saints have told me that when they first went there — 
 before the erection of the great organ — ^the free-and-easy 
 manners of the speakers and the brass band which was then 
 stationed in front of the platform, made them feel as if they 
 had come to witness a puppet-show, rather than to attend a 
 religious meeting. 
 
 There was one lady at the Tabernacle service whom I 
 regarded with considerable interest. This was no other than 
 Eliza R. Snow, one of the Prophet's wives. I was told that 
 she was the first woman married in Polygamy after Joseph 
 Smith received the Revelation, and I believe it was so. People 
 who lived in Nauvoo, respectable people, and not one or tv/o 
 
252 E. R. S. —HIGH-PRIESTESS OF THE CHURCH. 
 
 either, have assured me that for four years before Joseph is 
 said to have received the Revelation, he was practicing Poly- 
 gamy, or something worse, and that the Revelation was given 
 to justify what was already done. After it was given, or said 
 to be given, Joseph and his brother Hyrum cut off from the 
 Church more than one person for preaching it, and nine years 
 more passed away during which the Mormon Elders every- 
 where most emphatically and solemnly denied it, before it was 
 publicly avowed. However this might be, it is generally 
 understood that Eliza Snow was the first plural wife of the 
 Prophet, and I was told by a lady from Nauvoo that Joseph 
 did not care much for her, but that she was getting to be 
 quite a querulous old maid, and he married her to keep her 
 tongue quiet. If that is true she has entirely changed her 
 tactics since she left Nauvoo, for her principal occupation at 
 the present time is converting rebellious wives to obedience 
 to their husbands and convincing young girls that it is their 
 'duty to enter into Polygamy. Unhappy husbands derive 
 great consolation from her counsels. In matters of religion 
 she is a perfect fanatic, and in connection with the Female 
 Relief Society she reigns supreme ; but otherwise there are 
 many excellent traits in her character, and I could tell of 
 many acts of loving-kindness and self-denial which she has 
 performed, and which will surely have their reward. She is 
 said to have been tolerably good-looking when young, but in 
 appearance there is nothing now to distinguish her. As the 
 chief poet of the Mormon Church, and as the representative 
 of Eve in the mysteries of the Endowment House, she enjoys 
 a reputation such as would be impossible to any other woman 
 among the Saints. 
 
 Another of the late Joseph's wives is a Mrs. Doctor Jacobs, 
 who was actually married to the Prophet while she was still 
 living with her original husband, Jacobs. Under the same 
 circumstances she married Brigham Young, after Joseph's 
 death. For some time her husband knew nothing of the 
 whole affair, but Brigham very soon gave him to understand 
 that his company was not wanted. The sister of Mrs. Jacobs 
 
A STRONG-MINDED, ANGULAR, "SPIRITUAL" WIFE. 2$ 3 
 
 —a Mrs. Buel — was another of Joseph's wives, and she mar- 
 ried the Apostle Heber C. Kimball, but does not appear to 
 have made a very good bargain. 
 
 Besides these there is another lady, a Mrs. Shearer — or as 
 she rs familiarly called — " Aunty Shearer." She is in every 
 respect a unique specimen of womanhood, tall and angular, 
 with cold yet eager grey eyes, a woman of great volubility, 
 and altogether grim-looking and strong-minded. She was an 
 early disciple and is said to have sacrificed everything for 
 Mormonism. She Jjved in Joseph Smith's family, and, of 
 course, saw and heard a great deal about Polygamy, and at 
 first it was a great stumbling-block to her. She was, however, 
 instructed by the immaculate Joseph, and so far managed to 
 overcome her feelings as to be married to him for eternity^ 
 Like the others she is called " Mrs.," and I suppose there is a 
 Mr. Shearer somewhere, but upon that point she is very 
 reticent. Her little lonely hut is filled with innumerable 
 curiosities and little nick-nacks which some people are for 
 ever boarding away in the belief that they will come into use 
 some day. She is a woman that one could not easily forget. 
 She wears a muslin cap with a very wide border flapping vn 
 the wind under a comical-looking hood, and is easily recog~ 
 nised by her old yellow marten-fur cape and enormous muff : 
 her dress, which is of her own spinning and weaving, is but 
 just wide enough, and its length could never inconvenience 
 her. Add to these personal ornaments a stout pair of 
 brogues, and you will see before you " Aunty Shearer," one 
 of the Prophet's spiritual wives. 
 
 I inay as well explain what is meant by "spiritual" wives and 
 "proxy'' wives. 
 
 Marriages contracted by the Gentiles, or by Mormons in 
 accordance with Gentile institutions, are not considered bind- 
 ing by the Saints. That was partly the cause of my indigna- 
 tion and the indignation of many another wife and mother — 
 we were told that we had never been married at all, and that 
 our husbands and our children were not lawfully ours : surely 
 that was enough to excite the indignation of any wife, what- 
 
- aS4 HOW "PROXY." AND: "spiritual" WIVES; AfiE' "-SEALED." 
 
 ever her faith might be. For a marriage to be valid it must 
 be solemnized in the Endowment House in Salt Lake City, 
 or the persons contracting it can never expect to be husbandJ 
 and wife in eternity. Should: the husband die before> he 
 reaches Zion, aind if the wife loves him sufficiently wtll to; 
 wish to be his in eternity— when she arrives, in Salt Lake City, 
 if she receives an offer of marriage from one of the brethren, 
 and does not object to him as a second husband in this world,, 
 she will make an agreement with him that she will be his) 
 wife for time, but that in eternity she and all her children 
 shall be handed over to the first husband.. A woman thus< 
 married is, called' a " proxy " wife. It can well be understoodi:, 
 that if the lady had lost her youth and. good looks ther& 
 would b.e very little chance of her husband seeing her again 
 in eternity, as there would not be too many willing to stand 
 proxy for him, and in that case he would have to depend upon 
 the generosity of friendSi 
 
 Now " spiritual " wives are of two classes. The: one con-., 
 sists of old ladies who have plenty of money or propertyi 
 which of course needs looking after ; and generous Eldersi 
 marry them, and- accordingly " look after " that same property, 
 and the owner of it becomes the Elder's spirihial wife. She 
 will only be his real wife in eternity when she is rejuvenated. 
 — the prospect of which rejuvenation is, I suppose, very 
 fascinating to some men, for I have known quite youthful 
 ■Elders who displayed their self-sacrificing spirit by marrying- 
 "spiritually" very old, but very wealthy, ladies. 
 
 The other kind of " spiritual" wife is one who is married, 
 already, but who does not think that her husband can "exalt" 
 her to so high a position in the celestial world as she deserves; 
 — perhaps some kind brother who takes a great interest in 
 her welfare has told her so — she then is secretly "sealed" to 
 one of the brethren who is better able to exalt her — perhaps 
 to this same brother ; and in the resurrection she will pass 
 from him who was her husband on earth to him who is to be 
 her husband in heaven — if she has not done so before. 
 
 This is what is meant by "proxy" and "spiritual" wives^ 
 
SHE WANTED TO BE BRIGHAM YOUNG's "QUEEN!" 255 
 
 I think it will be evident even to the dullest comprehension 
 thai under such a system, "the world, the flesh, and the 
 devil " are far more likely to play a prominent part than any- 
 thing heavenly or spiritual. 
 
 All this is so repugnant to the instincts and feelings of a 
 true woman, that I feel quite ashamed to write about it. And 
 yet the working out of this system has produced results which 
 would be perfectly grotesque were it not that they outrage 
 every ordinary sense of propriety. Let me give an example. 
 One of the wives •£ Brigham Young — Mrs. Augusta Cobb 
 Young — a highly educated and intelligent Boston lady with 
 whom I am intimately acquainted, requested of her Prophet- 
 husband a favor of a most extraordinary description. She 
 had forsaken her lawful husband and family and a happy aitd 
 luxurious home to join the Saints, under the impression that 
 Brigham Young would make her his queen in heaven. She 
 was a handsome woman — a woman of many gifts and graces, 
 and Brigham thoroughly appreciated her ; but she made a 
 slight miscalculation in respect to the Prophet. He cares 
 little enough for his iirst wife, poor lady, and few people who 
 know him doubt for a moment that he would un-queen her 
 and cut her adrift for time and eternity too, if his avaricious 
 soul saw the slightest prospect of gain by doing so — he did 
 not care for her, but he never would allow himself to be 
 dictated to by any woman. So when the lady of whom I 
 speak asked him to place her at the head of his household, be 
 refused : she begged hard, but he would not relent. Then 
 finding that she could not be Brigham's "queen," and having 
 been taught by the highest Mormon Authorities that our 
 Saviour had, and has, many wives, she requested to be 
 " sealed " to Him ! Brigham Young told her (for what reason 
 I do not know) that it really was out of his power to do that, 
 but that he wbuld do "the next best thing" for her — ^he would 
 " seal " her to Joseph Smith. So she was sealed to Joseph 
 Smith, and" though Brigham still supports her and she is 
 called by his name on earth, in the resurrection she will leave 
 him and go over to the ori^nal Prophet. 
 16 
 
2S6 WHAT IS A "FIXIN?" 
 
 ■ The reader will certainly be shocked at this terrible bur- 
 lesque of sacred things, but I felt it my duty to state the truth 
 and place facts in their right light. It is not generally knowa 
 that the Mormons are taught that the marriage at Cana of 
 Galilee was Christ's own nuptial feast, th^t Mary and Martha 
 were his plural wives, and that those women who in various 
 parts of the New Testament are spoken of as ministering to 
 him stood to him in the same relation. 
 
 Malicious first wives, especially if they are rather elderly 
 ■themselves, frequently call the proxy wives "fixins ;" and the 
 tone in which some of them utter the word is in the last de- 
 gree contemptuous. These poor " fixins " are seldom treated 
 as real wives by the husband himself. He may think suffi- 
 ciently well of the " proxy " wife to make her his for time and 
 to raise up children to his friend, as the Elders say, but he 
 never forgets that in eternity she will be handed over to the 
 man for whom he has stood proxy, and he expects that she 
 also will bear that in mind, and do all she can for her own 
 support, and never complain of his want of attention to her. 
 Some men, after having married a young proxy wife, have be- 
 come so enamored that they grew jealous of the dead husband, 
 and have tried to get the wife to break faith with him, and be 
 married to them for eternity as well as time. This was cer- 
 ' tainly rather mean. Very few Gentile husbands would fret 
 themselves about possibilities in the world to come, if in this 
 world they had the certainty of enjoying the undivided affec- 
 tions of their wives. 
 
 Mormon husbands are so influenced by their religion that 
 they neither act nor think like other men. I am thinking of 
 one wretched family that I knew soon after I went to Utah. 
 There was a man andi his wife and four children, all living 
 together in a miserable, poverty-stricken hut. I had heard 
 that the man was paying attentions to a young girl with a view 
 to making her his second wife, and I frequently watched the 
 first wife as she went in and out, doing her chores, and won- 
 dered how she felt about it. The poverty of the man, of 
 course, was of no consequence ; living in the primitive style 
 
" SHE WOULD ONLY BE AN ANGEL ! " 257 
 
 In which necessity then compelled the Saints to live, one or 
 even half-a-dozen extra wives, made very little difference, and 
 Brigham and the leading Elders have, always represented it as 
 a meritorious act, for the young especially, to " build up the 
 kingdom," without regard to consequences, or the misery of 
 bringing up a family in a destitute condition. I never can see 
 children without loving them, and in this case it was not long 
 before I contrived to make acquaintance with the little ones. 
 One day, while I was talking to them, the mother came out. 
 She seemed pleased^o see me, for she had heard of me that I 
 was not too strong in the faith, and she told me that her hus- 
 band had said, in speaking of such, women as myself, who did 
 not like the celestial order of marriage, that their husbands 
 ought to force them right into it, and that would show what 
 they were made of : if they were true-hearted women seeking 
 their husband's glory and " exaltation " in the world to come, 
 they would bear it well enough ; and, if not, the sooner it 
 killed them the better ; for if they were dead their husbands 
 could save them in the resurrection, but if they lived they 
 would only be an incumbrance. 
 
 This, I found, was the general opinion among the Mormon 
 men. Even in England, the American Elders had taught us 
 that the man was the head and "saviour" of the woman, and that 
 the woman was only responsible to her husband. It was ne- 
 cessary, we were told, that the woman should keep in favor 
 with her lord, otherwise he might withdraw his protection and 
 refuse to take her into the celestial kingdom ; in which case 
 when she got to heaven she would only be an angel ! To be 
 an angel is not considered by the Saints to be toy any means 
 the highest state of glory. Those who do not obey the " Celes- 
 tial Order of Marriage" will, like the angels, neither marry nor 
 be given in marriage ; they will be located, the men in one 
 place, and the women in another, and will serve as slaves, lack- 
 eys, and boot-blacks to the Saints. Brigham Young once 
 publicly said of a certain President of the United States, that 
 he would clean the boots of the Mormon leaders in heaven 
 He did not say this as a figure of speech, but meant it liter- 
 
258 EXTKAORDINARY WAY OF PREPAKING FOR A BRIDE. 
 
 ally. Those who have obeyed the Gospel of the new dispen- 
 sation, but who have failed to enter into Polygamy will be as 
 upper servants, but the rebellious — the " vile apostates," and the 
 " wicked Gentiles " will join the angels and do all the drudg- , 
 ery for the men of many wives. Thus I learned in Zion that 
 my youthful notions about the glory of the cherubim were 
 quite a mistake, and that it was not isuch a fine thing to be an 
 angel, after all. 
 
 But I have run away from my story, and had almost 
 forgotten my poor acquaintance. She was a woman who was 
 likely to preserve a painful place in the memory of any one 
 who once saw her. Her face was pale as death, and her jet- 
 black eyes glistened with an unearthly lustre ; it was easy to 
 perceive that she was very unhappy, although she tried hard 
 to exhibit a cheerful disposition, and when our conversation 
 turned to that subject which to women here is all-absorbing, 
 the nervous twitching of her pale face showed how deeply pain- 
 ful such thoughts were to her. She told me that her husband 
 was soon to be married to a yoimg girl about fourteen years 
 of age. " Do you see," she said, " that he is building for her ?" 
 And sure enough he was, at odd hours, adding another hut to 
 the miserable hovel in which they already lived ; and thither, 
 when it was finished, he intended to take his bride. As I 
 looked at the poor wife, I felt little doubt, that ere that time 
 came, her troubles on earth would have ended and her little 
 ones would be motherless. 
 
 The Mormon women, as well as the Mormon men, are noted 
 for attending to their own business — they do not care to tell 
 their sorrows and trials to strangers or to people who are 
 not of their own faith. In this way visitors, to Salt Lake who 
 have gone there with the intention of "Writing-up" the Saints in 
 the newspapers or in a book, have generally been misled. My 
 own experience as a Mormon woman leads me to form any- 
 thing but a flattering opinion of the Mormon stories told by 
 Gentile pens. The following instance will show that the sis- 
 ters are not quite so free in giving their experience as some 
 writers would suggest. 
 
STRANGE INTERVIEW WITH A THIRD WIFE. 259 
 
 One day, while passing through the city, I saw a young 
 woman running across the road with a little child in her arms. 
 The child was crying piteously, for the water was running 
 from its clothing, and I saw in a moment that it had fallen 
 into the stream, which ran in front of the house. I fol- 
 lowed, to see if I could be of any assistance, but fortunately 
 found that the Uttle creature was not seriously hurt, but would 
 soon recover from the fright and cold. I helped the mother 
 to change its clothing, and while she was lulling her baby to 
 sleep, we entered into conversation. At first she appeared to 
 be very shy of me, and avoided speaking of anything in the 
 slightest degree personal ; but growing more interested, she 
 said at last : 
 
 " Are you a Mormon .'" 
 
 " Certainly," I answered, " but why do you ask me .'" 
 
 "Because," she said, "We have had one or two Gentile 
 women among us, and they go round among our people and 
 question the women, and get them to tell their troubles, which 
 God knows are heavy enough, and then they go and write 
 about it, and Brigham Young finds it out, and their husbands 
 are called to account for allowing their wives to speak to the 
 Gentiles. You are sure you are a Mormon .'" she added, 
 " and you are not deceiving me ?" 
 
 " I'm sorry you should think such a thing," I said, " but if 
 you suppose I would deceive you, I will not trouble you with 
 my company." And I rose up to leave. 
 
 " Do not go yet," she said, " and pray forgive me if I have 
 wounded your feelings ; it is simply the fear I have of getting 
 into trouble. Brigham Young and the Elders have frequently 
 told us to have nothing to do with the Gentiles, for they are 
 enemies to the kingdom of God, and are seeking our over- 
 throw — and I suppose it is true." 
 
 " How long have you been here ?" I asked. 
 
 " Over two years," she replied," and it seems almost twenty 
 — time has passed so slowly. I left father and mother, sis- 
 ters and brother for the Gospel's sake, and I do not regret it, 
 because it is right, but it was a very great sacrifice to make. 
 
260 A MORMON WIFe's OPINION OF liRIGHAM. 
 
 Yet I believe that God blesses us for the sacrifices we make, 
 and I shall get my reward." 
 
 '^You have it already," I said, '-in that pretty child on. 
 your knee, and your husband, I hope, is a good man and 
 kind to you." 
 
 "Yes," she anwered, "my child is a very great source of 
 happiness to me, and I love my husband very much but — " 
 (hesitatingly) " are you in Polygamy .?" 
 
 " No, not yet, but I do not know how soon my husband may 
 take it into his head to get another wife." 
 " Are you first wife .''" she asked. 
 " Yes," I replied, " and I suppose you are also .'" 
 " No, I am third wife," she said, " I wish I were first wife." 
 " But why," I suggested, " do you wish that "i If Polygamy 
 is the true order of marriage, I do not see that it makes 
 much difference whether one is the first or the twentieth wife ?" 
 " Oh dear, yes," she replied, " it does make a great deal of 
 difference ; for the first wife will be queen over all the others, 
 and reign with her husband. If I had known that before I 
 was married, I should have made my husband promise to place 
 me first. Men can do that if they like." 
 
 " But do you think you would be doing right in trying to 
 gain the position of first wife in that way .'" 
 
 "Why not.'" she said, " Didn't Jacob obtain his brother's 
 birthright by deception — and was he ever punished for it ? Do 
 you think that Brother Brigham, notwithstanding that he is 
 the inspired servant of God, could have obtained his position, 
 and all his money, by simple honest dealing .' If you think so, 
 I don't ; and it is just as proper and right for us women to 
 secure a position for ourselves by such means as it is for Brig- 
 ham Young — the end justifies the means." 
 . " If that is so," I said, " it is a wonder to me that any 
 woman should consent to become second, third, or fourth wife 
 — seeing they cannot be queens." 
 
 " I can see that you have not yet had your ' Endowments,' " 
 she said, " or you would understand more about these things, 
 but as you are a good Mormon I can speak freely to yoa 
 
HOW A WOMAN CAN BECOME A QUEEN. 261 
 
 You see it is not always those who are first wives in this world 
 who will be first in the celestial kingdom. It all depends 
 upon the amount of sacrifice the wife is capable of making for 
 her husband, her faithfulness to him, and the number of 
 children she has borne him. If she pleases him in every par- 
 ticular and is good, patient, and above all things obedient to 
 all his wishes and commands, then slie is almost certain to be 
 made queen, unless the first wife is just as good, and then I 
 don't know how they would fix that. And so you see it is 
 safer to be first wife at once." 
 
 " Well Ijut," I asked, " knowing all this, I am surprised that 
 you consented to be third wife !" 
 
 " But I did not know it then," she continued. " My hus- 
 band told me that all the wives were queens — all equal — and 
 he says so still when I talk to him about it. But he can't 
 deceive me. I have spoken to some of the old Nauvoo women 
 who know all about it, and they tell me that all the Poly- 
 gamic wives will be subject to the first wife; but the first wife, 
 having suffered most, will be the one who has gone through 
 the fire and been purified, and found worthy." 
 
 " But do you think that your husband would wish to deceive 
 you about such an important matter T I said. 
 
 " Wait till you have lived a little longer here," she replied, 
 " and you will be able to answer that question yourself, or else 
 your experience will be very different from that of the rest of 
 the people here." 
 
 Just then the husband made his appearance, and put an end 
 to the conversation. He was a tall, dark-looking man, with 
 grey hair, old enough to be her fatheV. He appeared to be 
 well educated and to have seen better days, though everything 
 about their home indicated poverty — the room in which we 
 were sitting had no carpet on the floor, there was a plain 
 white-pine table in the middle, a small sheet-iron stove, four 
 wooden chairs, a small looking-glass, and some cheap pictures. 
 This was the sitting-room for the whole family — three wives, 
 eleven children, one husband. He asked me if I had seen the 
 rest of the family. 
 
262 THE FATHER OF THE LITTLE FAMILY. 
 
 I replied negatively, and he said he would see if any of them 
 were about. Presently he returned accompanied by an 
 elderly woman whom he introduced as Mrs. Simpson. Then 
 came another, not quite as good-looking as the first, but a 
 great deal younger, and he introduced her as " My wife Ellen. 
 And this one," he said, turning to the one with whom I had 
 been conversing, "is my wife Sarah. Don't you think I have 
 got three fine-looking women .'" Then, after a pause, he 
 added : " And they are just as good as they are good-looking 
 — good, obedient wives. I have no trouble with them: 
 my wishes are law in this house. Here you have ^ family in 
 which the Spirit of God reigns. We are not rich in worldly 
 goods, as you see, but we are laying up treasure in heaven. 
 We all live in this little home of four rooms. My wife Ellen, 
 here, has given up her room for a parlor for us all to meet 
 together in, and she sleeps in a wagon-box ; it is not the most 
 comfortable, but she never grumbles. Then, here is our 
 Sarah ; we are obliged to humor her a little, and give her a 
 room all to herself. She is young and inexperienced, and 
 doesn't like to put up with the inconveniences that the Saints 
 have to bear with ; while old mother here has got to have 
 half-a-dozen children in her room, but she never complains." 
 
 " Why did you not wait," I said, " until you had a larger 
 house .''" 
 
 " Then where would my kingdom be .'" he answered, 
 " Young men may wait, but old men must improve thei*- time," 
 
 There came in now a troop of children of all ages. They 
 had, been playing in the lot, were miserably clad, bare- 
 footed, and some looked gaunt and hungry: — manners to 
 match. " These," he said, with all a father's fondness-^ 
 " these constitute my kingdom, and I am proCid of them." 
 
 I felt thankful that I was not destined to be queen over 
 such a kingdom, wished them good-bye, and with a sad heart, 
 went home to my own darling little ones not knowing what 
 might be their fate. 
 
CHAPTER XIX. 
 
 BRIGHAM YOUNG AT HOME :— WE VISIT THE PROPHET AND 
 
 HIS WIVES. 
 
 Inside the Lion House — The Family-Circle of the Prophet — A Gracious Recep- 
 tion — A Woman's Description of Brigham Young — His Early Life and Strug- 
 , gles— Working for "Six Bits" a Day— How he "Ate Up all the Corn"— 
 How he Worked as a Painter and Glazier — Born at the Right Time — Brigham 
 Young's Character Summed Up — How he Obtained his Position — The Twelve 
 Apostles of Mormonism — Intrigues for Place and Power — Pulling the Nose of 
 a Queen — Delivered Over to "The Buffetings of Satan" — Poor Sidney ! — 
 The " First Presidency " — Yearly Elections — A Foe to Education — What 
 Boys and Girls Should Learn — An Unfortunate Musical Society — Moral 
 Delinquencies of the Prophet — Borrowing Clothes for a Conference — How 
 a Million Dollars were Borrowed and Paid I — Brigham's Avarice, Cowardice, 
 and Thefts — A Terrible Despotism — Lost Opportunities. 
 
 SHORTLY after our arrival in Salt Lake City we visited 
 President Young, who received us very graciously and 
 appointed an early day for us to dine with him. 
 
 On that occasion he invited some of the Apostles and lead- 
 ing men to meet us at his table, and we passed an exceedingly 
 pleasant evening! The Prophet made himself very affable ; 
 talked with us about our missionary life and other subjects of 
 personal and general interest ; and expressed a high opinion , 
 of the energy and ability which my husband had displayed. 
 His wives, too, — who I found, as far as I could judge from 
 such a casual acquaintance, to be amiable and kind-hearted 
 ladies, — made every effort to render our visit agreeable. 
 
 I was much pleased with the manner and appearance of 
 
264 A LIFE-POKTKAIT OF THE PROPHET. 
 
 Brigham Young, and felt greatly re-assured ; for he did not 
 seem to me like a man who would preach and practice such 
 things as I had heard of him while I was in London. This I 
 was glad to see, for it encouraged me to think that, perhaps, 
 after all, matters might not be so bad as I had anticipated. 
 We were, in fact, very kindly received in Salt Lake City by 
 every one with whom we came in contact ; for having been Mis- 
 sionaries for so many years, we were, of course, well known by 
 name, and had a wide circle of acquaintances among the chief 
 Elders and emigrants. 
 
 Fifteen years have, of course, worked a gfeat change in the: 
 appearance of Brigham Young ; but though he is now nearly 
 seventy-three years of age, he is still a portly-looking — I might 
 almost say handsome man. His good looks are not of the 
 poetic or romantic kind at all ; he is very common-place and 
 practical in his appearance, but long and habitual exercise of 
 despotic authority has stamped itself upon his, features, and is 
 seen even in the way he carries" himself :— he might without 
 any stretch of the imagination be mistaken for a retired sea. 
 captain. 
 
 When I first knew him in appearance he was little over 
 fifty years of age, was of medium height, well built, upright, 
 and, as I just stated> with the air of one accustomed to be 
 obeyed. His hair was light, — sandy,' t suppose I ought to call 
 it, — with eyes to match ; and the expression of his counten- 
 ance was pleasant and manly. I, of course, regarded him 
 from a woman's stand-point ; but there were others who were 
 accustomed to study physiognomy, and they detected — or, 
 thought they detected — in the cold expression of his eye and 
 the stern, hard lines of his lips, evidences of cruelty, selfish- 
 ness, and dogged determination which, it is only fair to say, I 
 ■ myself never saw. 
 
 The lines on his face have deepened of late year-s, as what 
 little of gentleness his heart ever knew has died out within 
 him ; but still he presents the appearance of a man who would 
 afford a deep study to the observer of human nature. In 
 early life he had to work hard for a living, and according to 
 
^SSJ'^'^^t. 
 
 ttrtyC^-t^ 
 
THE PROPHET AS A PAINTER AND GLAZIER. 265 
 
 his own Statement he had a rough time of it. He was, by 
 trade, a painter and glazier, and has frequently said in public 
 that in those times he was glad to work for " six bits '' a day, 
 and to keep his hands busy from morning to night to get even 
 that. Whether or not the privations of early years fostered 
 in him that avaricious and grasping spirit which of late years 
 has been so conspicuous in him, I cannot say, but it is certain 
 that it cropped out very early in his career as a Saint. An 
 old Nauvoo Missionary, — a Mormon of the Mormons once, 
 but now, alas ! a " vjle apostate " as Brigham would politely 
 call him, — once told me that when the Prophet Joseph Smith 
 sent the Apostle Young on Mission, a good deal of discontent 
 was shown that the said Apostle did not account properly for 
 the collections and tithings which passed through his hands. 
 Brother Joseph who was then " the Church " suggested in a 
 pleasant way^or the Prophet Smith was a big, jovial fellow, 
 six feet two or three inches in height, and withal somewhat of 
 a humorist — that the said Apostle Brigham would appear in 
 his eyes a better Saint if he displayed a little less love for 
 filthy lucre. Thereupon the Apostle, like somebody else who 
 shall be nameless, quoted Scripture and reminded the Prophet 
 that Moses had said " Thou shalt not muzzle the mouth of the 
 ox that treadeth out the corn." "True, Brother Brigham," 
 said Joseph, " but Moses did not say the ox was to eat up all 
 the corn." Brother Brigham made no reply, but is said to 
 have " sulked " for two or three days. 
 
 I have not the slightest doubt that, but for Mormonism, the 
 Prophet would have remained all his life a journeyman painter, 
 and his " sweetness," as the poet says, would have been wasted 
 " on the desert air.". But he was bom just at the right time, 
 and he fitted into the right groove ; and thus, while, the orig- 
 inal Prophet of the new faith — ^Joseph Smith — a man of ten 
 times the intellect of his successor, a man ignorant and 
 deluded, it is true, but, at the same time, a man in whom was 
 the material for one of those natural giants who from age to 
 age have left the impress of their individuality upon the his- 
 tory of the world ; — while, I say, this man's name and doings 
 
266 THE REAL CHARACTER OF BRIGHAM YOUNG. 
 
 have ceased to interest any but persons of studious mindr,^! 
 Brigkam Young, whose narrow soul could never look beyond' 
 the little circle in which he hved; whose selfishness and 
 heartlessness have been only equalled by his cruelty and 
 degrading avarice, has, by the force of circumstances alone, 
 obtained a place in the recognition of the world, to which by 
 nature or by grace he had not the shadow of a claim. 
 
 I have often heard intelligent Gentiles remark " Well, Brig- 
 ham Young may be a wicked man and an impostor, but there 
 must be a great deal of talent in him, to manage those people 
 for so many years." 
 
 From this opinion I altogether dissent ; and those who 
 know Brigham best, think with nie, though many of them 
 would not dare to say so. I do not think Brigham Young a 
 wicked man or an impostor in the sense in which those words 
 are ordinarily used ; and experience, and a careful study of his 
 life and doings, have convinced me that he is certainly not a 
 great man or a man of genius in any sense of the word. 
 There can be no doubt that he has been guilty of many and 
 great crimes, but I believe that in the early part of his career 
 he was so blinded by fanaticism that those crimes appeared to 
 him actually virtues : — the force of habit and the daily associai- 
 tions of his life have so completely taken from him all sense of 
 right and wrong ; while the devotion of his people has made 
 the idea that /?^x could possibly do the slightest wrong so 
 utterly inconceivable to him and to them ; that his percep^ 
 tions of justice, truth, honor, honesty, and upright dealing are 
 as utterly stultified as they ever were in the mind of the 
 wildest savage who prowled among the cliffs and canons of 
 the Rocky Mountains. 
 
 People think that Brigham Young attained to his present 
 position by the exercise of ability, such as has been displayed^ 
 only on a greater scale, by all those men, who, not being born 
 to power, nor having it thrust upon them, have by the force of 
 their genius seized it and held it — unlawfully it might be, buty 
 nevertheless, with talent and moral energy. 
 
 Nothing could be more untrue. The fact that he was of a 
 
HOW BROTHER BRIGHAM OBTAINED HIS POSITION. 267 
 
 certain age at a certain time, and only that, was the cause of 
 Brother Brigham's first step up the ladder of ambition. 
 Joseph Smith endeavored, in organising his newly-invented 
 religion, to make it resemble as much as was possible both the 
 old and new dispensations of Christianity, and among other 
 institutions he appointed "Twelve Apostles" who were to assist 
 in governing the Church. He associated with himself his elder 
 brother, Hyrum, and also Sidney Rigdon, who had so greatly 
 assisted in every way to establish the new faith and define its 
 principles. This Rigdon is the same who has always been 
 suspected of the authorship of the Book of Mormon, though it 
 must be admitted that nothing more than circumstantial 
 evidence can be adduced in support of this statement. How- 
 ever that might be, the two Smiths, Joseph and Hyrum, and 
 Sidney Rigdon formed what was called the "First Presidency" 
 — in other words they were " the Church." Next in order to 
 them came the "Twelve Apostles," and after them the "Seven- 
 ties," and the other grades of the Priesthood, of which I shall 
 say more presently. The "Twelve Apostles" were first ap- 
 pointed according to a plan of Joseph's own — Lyman Johnson 
 was placed first, Brigham Young came next, and the others 
 followed. Not long after, however, Joseph made a new ar- 
 rangement, and placed the Twelve according to their age, and 
 this plan was always followed subsequently. Thomas B. 
 Marsh now stood first, and next to him came David Patten, 
 and then Brigham Young. 
 
 I am obliged to give these little details, in order that the 
 reader may understand Brigham's position after the death of 
 Joseph Smith. 
 
 When Joseph was murdered in Carthage Jail, with his 
 brother Hyrum, Sidney Rigdon alone remained of the First 
 Presidency. 
 
 At that time Thomas B. Marsh, the first of the Apostles, 
 had apostatised ; David Patten had been killed in a fight with 
 the mob ; and, consequently, Brigham Young was now Presi- 
 dent of the Twelve— he being the next in age. Thus it will 
 be seen that even had he been (which he was not) the most 
 
268 "little VIC." THREATENED BY A PROPHET. 
 
 Stupid and least fitted of all the Apostles to preside over the 
 Chui-ch, his years would nevertheless have given him the 
 leadership. 
 
 Up to this time there is no evidence that any idea of 
 becoming head of the Church had ever entered into Brigham's 
 mind. Indeed it is reported that Joseph on one occasion, re- 
 proving him, said ironically that if ever the Church had the 
 misfortune to be led by Brother Brigham, he would lead it to 
 
 ^well, a place which is understood to be uncomfortably 
 
 warm. But Joseph was now dead> and Rigdon alone remained 
 between the Apostle Young and the headship of the Church. 
 Then jt was that his eyes appear for the first time to have 
 been fully opened to the advantages of his position. 
 
 Now when the ancients, took the fox as an emblem of craft- 
 iness, it was because they had never known "Brigham. Brig- 
 ham worked cautiously and prudently, for he probably is one 
 of the greatest cowards in existence, both morally and physi- 
 cally, and like all cowards he was perfectly aufait in work- 
 ing in the dark. In accomplishing the removal of Rig- 
 don, Rigdon himself was Brigham's best assistant. A man of 
 prudence, or even of common sense, might have safely held 
 his position against all the Brighams in the world, but prud- 
 ence and common sense were qualities utterly unknoVvn to 
 Rigdon. He began to have wonderful visions and revelations, 
 announced the immediate ending of the world, and stated that 
 he would forthwith lead out the armies of the Lord to the 
 battle of Armageddon, in Palestine, and then return in triumph, 
 calling by the way, as he said, " to pull the nose of little Vic. !" 
 " Little Vic." was the English Queen — then a young woman 
 — but how she incurred Rigdon's wrath, I do not know. In 
 addition to all this absurd nonsense, he ordained some of his 
 particular friends to be prophets, priests, and kings, and 
 otherwise showed that he intended to carry matters with a 
 high haiid. 
 
 Brigham watched his chance, and when he considered that 
 matters were ripe for a change, by dint of secret manoeuver- 
 ing, he caused Rigdon to be tried before the " High. Council " 
 
HOW BRIGHAM YOUNG OBTAINED HIS POSITION. 269 
 
 at Nauvoo. Rigdon sent word that he was sick, and could 
 not come, but the trial went on, and of course it could have 
 but one ending. The result was — as the Mormon papers at 
 the time reported — that : " Elder Young arose and delivered 
 Sidney Rigdon over to the buffetings of Satan, for a thousand 
 years, in the name of the Lord ; and all the people said, 
 Amen." 
 
 Poor Sidney ! He tried to set up a church for himself, and 
 a good many people followed him, but the attempt was a fail- 
 ure. He is now a, very old man, and cannot live long, but 
 he still believes in the truth of Mormonism, as established by 
 Joseph Smith. 
 
 Brigham's next step was to declare that the government of 
 the Church was now vested in the Twelve, of whom he was 
 the head. Later still he contrived, by selecting a time when 
 nearly all of the Apostles would be promoted or in some way 
 gratified by a change in the organisation of the Church, to get 
 himself elected President of the Church, in the place of 
 Joseph, with the two Apostles next under him as lis associ- 
 ates, under the name of " counsellors ;" and they together 
 formed the First Presidency. Thus Brigham became in 
 name, as well as in fact, the head of the Mormon Church. 
 Every year. Brother Brigham, in common with all the other 
 officers ot the Church, is duly re-elected ; I need hardly say 
 that the re-election is a matter of course — an opposition candi- 
 date would stand but a poor chance of success. 
 
 Brigham Young is an uneducated man. For that, of 
 course, he is not deserving of blame, but his opposition to 
 education in others and to all that is intellectual and elevating 
 does him little credit. Only a very few years ago he with his 
 two " Counsellors," — Heber C. Kimball and Jedediah M. 
 Grant, who were both spoken of as model Saints, — held forth 
 in the Tabernacle, in the most unmeasured language, against 
 schools and scholastic acquirements of every description. 
 They were all three untaught men, and like all persons of 
 small mind who have not themselves received any education, 
 they hated and affected to despise those who had. Thought- 
 
270 EDUCATION AT A DISCOUNT. 
 
 ful men, although they may never have enjoyed the advan- 
 tages of literary culture, never fail to see the great power that 
 it is, either for good or evil ; and in most cases they try to 
 secure for their children the blessing of which they themselves 
 have been denied. But the Mormon leaders, while they 
 ridiculed and affected to despise men of education, were 
 shrewd enough to see that if schools were established and the 
 children of the Saiijts permitted to attend them, the bonds 
 of superstition would certainly be shaken and the fabric of 
 Mormonism undermined. They, consequently, discouraged 
 every attempt at self-improvement, and taught the people 
 to aspire to nothing higher for their children than the rudi- 
 ments of reading, writing, and arithmetic for the boys, and 
 a knowledge of household, dairy, and farm work for the girls. 
 
 Before the " Reformation " a few young men anxious to 
 improve their minds, organised what they called the " Liter- 
 ary and Musical Society." They gave pleasant social enter- 
 tainments to their friends at which they gave recitations, 
 read esSays, poems, and other literary productions, vary- 
 ing' the programme with selections of music. The au- 
 thorities looked upon the whole proceeding with disfavor, 
 and soon broke up the society. Not content with this, and 
 in order to show their contempt, they humiliated the mem- 
 bers in every possible way, even publicly pointing them out 
 to ridicule, and appointing a good many of them to be door- 
 keepers in the Tabernacle. Brigham Young, who it is said, 
 never in his life read a book, could not understand that they 
 could find any pleasure in intellectual amusements, and ac- 
 cused them of pride, conceit, and even wickedness. Among 
 the Church leaders it is even now common to speak of any one 
 who has any literary acquirements as " having the big head," 
 and being " next door to apostacy." 
 
 Recently greater efforts to obtain a good education for their 
 children have been made by the more intelligent among the 
 Saints, and the Gentiles in Utah have established some very 
 excellent schools. A library and reading-room have also been 
 opened, and the latter has been well attended by the young 
 
THE prophet's BANK ACCOUNT. 27 1 
 
 men, both Mormons and Gentiles. Brigham himself has with 
 his usual inconsistency even gone so far as to give to his own 
 children those advantages which he selfishly denied to his 
 poorer brethren. 
 
 Of the Prophet's moral character, the less said the better. 
 He has been remorseless and cruel in his enmities, and he has 
 connived at and even suggested, if nothing more, some of the 
 most atrocious crimes that have ever been perpetrated on the 
 face of the earth. In business matters, in the payment of 
 money — to use a popular phrase — his word is as good as his 
 bond, but in the accumulation of wealth he has evinced an 
 amount of dishonesty which can scarcely be credited. Brig- 
 ham always meets his obligations, and pays his debts, and gets 
 a lawful receipt : — the prophetic business could not otherwise 
 •be carried on ; but the way in which he has obtained his 
 wealth would put to the blush the most dishonest member of 
 any " ring " in New York; or elsewhere. When he attended 
 his first Conference, he says he had to borrow certain mascu- 
 line garments and a pair of boots before he could put in 
 an appearance. Now it would be difficult to estimate the 
 value of his.property. He has taken up large tracts of land 
 all over the Territory, he has the uncontrolled and unques- 
 tioned command of all the tithing and contributions of the 
 Saints, and from gifts and confiscations, and innumerable other 
 sources, his revenue pours in. It was once rumored that he 
 had eighteen or twenty millions of dollars in the Bank of Eng- 
 land; but Brigham said that the report was not true. "The 
 Church," he added, had a little money invested abroad. The 
 difference between " The Church" and the individual Brigham. 
 Young has yet to be determined. 
 
 In the year 1852 the " Prophet of the Lord " found that he 
 had borrowed an mconveniently large sum from the funds of 
 the Church. He is " Trustee in Trust" and, of course, legally 
 responsible ; but he never renders an account of his steward- 
 ship, and no one ever asks him for it. His sense of honesty 
 was, however, so strong that he resolved to have his account 
 balanced, and be went down to the Tithing-Office for that 
 
 17 
 
2/2 HOW.BRIGHAM RETURNED HIS LOAN TO THE CHURCH. 
 
 purpose. There he found that his indebtedness amounted to 
 two hundred thousand dollars, and he proceeded to pay it after 
 his own fashion : — the clerk was instructed to place to his 
 credit the same amount "for services rendered" In 1 867, he 
 owed very nearly one million dollars, which he had borrowed 
 from the same fund, and he balanced his account in the same 
 way. His contract for the Pacific Railroad is said to have 
 yielded him a quarter of a million, and his other contracts and 
 mining speculations, purchases and thefts of lands, houses, 
 &c., have been very profitable. The expenses of such a family 
 as 'Brother Brigham's must be something enormous, but the 
 contributions which by honest and dishonest means he has 
 levied have been so large that he must still be one of the 
 wealthiest men in the States. 
 
 Brigham is not a generous man. He has given occasion- • 
 ally, as for instance at the time of the Chicago fire, when he 
 presented a thousand dollars for the sufferers, but even then 
 his motive was evident — the affairs of " Deseret " were under 
 discussion in Congress. Without the certainty of a profitable 
 return, Brigham never gave a cent. The story of his sordid 
 avarice and his contemptible meanness in the accumulation 
 of money would fill a volume. 
 
 Morally and physically the Prophet is a great coward. 
 When he and other Church leaders were arrested a year or 
 two ago, charged with the very gravest crimes, the effect upon 
 the Prophet was most distressing. He had solemnly sworn 
 in the Tabernacle that he would shoot the man who attempted 
 to arrest him ; but when Judge McKean opened court and 
 placed him under arrest he swallowed his threats and played 
 the coward's part. Before this the world has seen wretches 
 who were notorious for their cruelty and tyranny, and who 
 were also remarkable for their cowardice. For many years 
 he has imitated royalty and has had a strong body-guard to 
 keep watch and ward around his person every night. No 
 man has , less cau^e to apprehend personal violence than 
 Brother Brigham, but the voice of conscience, which, as the 
 poet says, makes cowards of us all, suggests his fears. 
 
LOST OPPORTUNITIES. 273 
 
 No one, probably, ever possessed and lost greater oppor- 
 tunities of doing good and leaving behind him an enviable 
 record than Brother Brigham. In him the Saints, from the 
 Smallest to the greatest, placed implicit trust, and it was in 
 his power to mould them at his will. The spiritual and 
 temporal welfare of the people was in his hands. The ability 
 to elevate them socially, mentally, and morally was his. A 
 great trust was committed to his charge. But he has basely 
 betrayed that sacred trust, and has not only left undone what 
 he should have performed, but he has been guilty of the 
 most grievous wrong-doing. He has set at nought all moral- 
 ity with his horrible and debasing teachings respecting a 
 " blood-atonement " — in other words, the duty of assassination. 
 He has outraged decency and riven asunder the most sacred 
 social and domestic ties by his shameless introduction of 
 Polygamy. He has sacrilegiously defiled the temple of God, 
 by teaching his followers to worship Adam as their divinity, 
 and has robbed Christ of his birthright by proclaiming that men 
 are the only saviours of their wives and that in respect to 
 women the sacrifice of our Lord was of no direct avail. In a 
 word — both by his preaching and his" practice he has set an 
 example so bad as to be utterly without parallel in this 
 civilised age. Kings and emperors there are who hold in 
 slavery the persons of men : hierarchs there are who hold in 
 bondage the souls of the deluded. But the despot meddles 
 not with the eternal welfare of his subject, nor does he pollute 
 the sacred precincts of the hearth and home ; and the false 
 priest is not permitted to meddle with temporal affairs. But 
 the Mormon despot— Brigham Young — has played the tyrant 
 in both spiritual and worldly matters,— ^has meddled with the 
 person, the property, and the lives and the liberty of his 
 dupes ; and has at the same time debased and enslaved their 
 souls. 
 
 But let it not be supposed that I write this hastily, or 
 without due consideration. People outside of Utah may be 
 deceived, as indeed they frequently are, by representations 
 made in ignorance of what Mormonism and the Prophet 
 
274 THE TRUE CHARACTER OF THE MORMON PEOPLE. 
 
 really are. But the Gentiles lopg resident in Utah, the 
 Apostates, an,d even the Mormon people themselves, if only 
 they would tell the truth, could testify to the truthfulness, of 
 the picture which I have drawn of Brother Brigham. 
 
 A better people — raside from their religion — than the 
 believing Mormons when they emigrated to Utah, it would be 
 difficult to find. Their fault was in their faith. They were 
 honest, sober, industrious, and ready to sacrifice everything 
 to what they considered religious duty. I cannot think of 
 them and of the implicit confidence which they placed in 
 Brigham, without wondering at his folly in throwing away 
 the noble opportunity, which was once within his grasp, of 
 establishing a happy and contented people. Instead of this 
 he has gathered wealth to himself and family ; out of the 
 poverty of his followers he has amassed enormous riches, and 
 with the power to leaye behind him a name as one of the 
 benefactors of the human race, he has set the worst exanjple 
 which despot or false prophet ever presented to the world. 
 
CJIAPTER XX. 
 
 THE WIVES OF BRIGHAM YOUNG :— THEIR HISTORY AND 
 THEIR DAILY LIFE. 
 
 The Prophet at Home — His Own Little Family— Domestic Life of a Patriarch — 
 Wife the First — Two Sisters Married to the Same Man — Brigham's Son at 
 West Point— Slje "Had Her Day"— A Troublesome Wife— The Privil- 
 eges of Mormon Women — Shocking Case of Infatuation — Emmeline — The 
 Forsaken Favorite — The Fickle Fancies of the Prophet : — Amelia : "the Queen 
 of the Harem"— The Follies of a Modern Prophet— The Charms of Julia 
 Dean — The Spirit of the Prophet Subdued by Amelia's Will — Eliza-Ann 
 Tells Her Own Story — How Brother Brigham Won His Last Wife — Fictions 
 and Frauds — Brigham Names the Marriage Day — He Came "Just as it Hap- 
 pened" — Getting Groceries in a Small Way — "Two Bits' Worth of Fresh 
 Meat "—The Conclusibn of Eliza-Ann's Story— A Patriarchal Family— The 
 Father of Fifty Children— A Questionable Story— "Whose Child is He"— 
 Inside the Prophet's Mansion — Pocket-Mohey and Divorce — Domestic Life 
 of the Prophet — Entertaining a Visitor — How a Large Family is Managed — 
 — ^The Patriarch at Hpme. 
 
 THE wives of Brigham Young have always been subjects 
 of interest to Gentiles who visited Zion ; and having 
 spoken of their husband, I think it is only fair that I should 
 say a few words about them. 
 
 For many years I have known personally all the Prophet's 
 wives who reside in Salt Lake City, and I wish to speak of 
 them with kindness aivd respect. They are women whom 
 any one would esteem — conscientious, good, earnest women ; 
 faithful, true-hearted wives, who have devoted their lives to 
 the carrying out of what they believe is the revealed will of 
 God. 
 
276 THE WIVES OF BRIGHAM YOUNG. 
 
 When I first knew Brother Brigham, poor man, he had 
 only sixteen living with him in Salt Lake City; and even 
 now he has no more than nineteen ! Perhaps I ought to say 
 eighteen, since Eliza-Ann has run away from him and left 
 the poor old gentleman desolate and forlorn". The three whom 
 he took after I came to Utah, were Amelia Folsom, Mary 
 Van Cott Cobb, and Eliza-Ann. But the reader will per- 
 haps be interested in hearing about them all, and so I will 
 state the names and order of the ladies as they at present 
 stand — according to the date of their marriage ; making 
 mention e* the proxy wives last of all,, for the sake of con- 
 venience and without reference to date. Of course Brother 
 Brigham has had many more than nineteen wives, but the 
 following are the living ladies : others are dead or have 
 strayed away, no one knew whither, and perhaps, as Brother 
 Heber once said to me, nobody cared. , 
 
 Allow me to introduce the Mrs. Young. 
 
 MRS. MARY ANN ANGELL YOUNG. 
 [Number One.] 
 
 First in order is Mrs. Mary Ann Angell Young, but she Is 
 not the first wife that Brother Brigham ever had. Once upon 
 a time. Brother Brigham was a Methodist ; but after listening 
 to the preaching of the Mormon Missionaries he became a 
 vile apostate — as he loves to call those who leave his present 
 faith — and he forsook Methodism. In those days, before he 
 apostatised, and long before he ever dreamed of Polygamy, he 
 had but one wife — one only ! It must seem strange to the 
 Prophet to look back to that period of solitary existence. His 
 second wife was Mrs. Angell Young ; and I call her his first 
 wife because she is the first of those living now. As she was 
 married to him after the death of his first wife, she is, of 
 course, his legal wife, and would be recognised as such in 
 any civilised country. She is a very fine-looking old lady and 
 very much devoted to her unfaithful lord and master, firmly 
 believing in his divine mission. She lives by herself and is 
 seldom , troubled with a visit from her affectionate spouse. 
 
THE FIRST FAMILY OF BRIGHAM YOUNG. 277 
 
 Once in a while Brigham brings her out to a party when he 
 has invited any Gentiles, just for appearance sake. Quite a 
 number of • persons in Utah believe that she is dead, so very 
 little is seen and known of her. She lives in the White 
 House — Brigham's first residence in Salt Lake City — and is 
 much thought of by those who do know her. Her children 
 are greatly attached to her, and show her a great deal of 
 attention, making up in this way, to a certain extent, for her 
 husband's neglect ; her three sons, Joseph A., Brigham — who 
 it is expected will leucceed his father as President of the 
 Churc}> — and John W., as well as her two daughters, Alice and 
 Luna, are all in Polygamy. Each of the sons has three 
 wives ; and each of the daughters has a half-sister as a 
 partner in her husband's affections. Brigham has not the 
 slightest objection to giving two of his daughters to the same 
 husband. 
 
 LUCY DECKER SEELY YOUNG. 
 [Number Two.] 
 
 Lucy Decker Seely Young was his first wife in Polygamy. 
 Her former husband was a Mr. Seely. She is short and 
 stout, a very excellent mother and a devf ted wife. Her son, 
 Brigham Heber, is now one of the cadets at West Point. The 
 sending of this young man to West Point to be educated, 
 when it was noticed in the pubUc papers, excited some little 
 interest, and the faith of many of the good Mormons was 
 very much shaken by it. They had believed that Brigham 
 really meant what he taught when he told the people not to 
 allow their children to associate with the Gentiles, as it would 
 cause them to lose " the spirit." But they were still further 
 shocked when they learned that several other sons of Brigham 
 were to go to the Eastern States to be educated. They have 
 yet to learn that the Prophet does not intend them to do as 
 he does but rather as he tells them. My own opinion is that 
 Brother Brigham has advocated one course of conduct for the 
 people while he pursued another himself. 
 
Z^8 THE prophet's LITTLE FAMILY. 
 
 CLARA DECKER YOUNG. 
 [Number Three.] 
 
 Clara Decker Young is the third wife. She is a sister of 
 Lucy Seely, and like her is short and stout, but otherwise 
 , good-looking. She is more than twenty years younger than 
 her lord, with whom she was once quite a favorite, but like 
 many others, she has "had her day" — to use Brigham's own 
 expression — and is now, as a matter of course, neglected. 
 
 HARRIET COOK YOUNG. 
 [Number Four.] 
 
 Harriet Cook Young, is tall, with light hair and blue eyes, 
 and is an intelligent but not at all a refined woman. ■ She is 
 said to, have given a great deal of trouble to Brother Brigharn, 
 of whom she has frequently said very hard things. In times 
 past she had the reputation of being a good deal more than a 
 match for her husband when she had any cause of offence 
 against him, but in her quiet moments she is a very sincere 
 Mormon. She has only one son — Oscar Young — now about 
 twenty-five years of age. When he was born, Brighani kindly 
 announced to her *hat because she was not obedient she 
 should have no more children, and during more than a quarter 
 of a century he has kept his word. Why she has remained 
 with him so long is a mystery, for she makes no secret of her 
 feelings towards him. 
 
 LUCY BIGELOW YOUNG. 
 [Number Five.] 
 
 Lucy Bigelow Young is quite a fine-looking woman — ^tall and 
 fair, and still quite young. She has three pretty daughters. 
 Brigham has recently sent her to live in southern Utah. 
 
 MRS. TWISS YOUNG. 
 [Number Six.] 
 
 Mrs. Twiss Young has no children, but she is a very good 
 housewife, and Brigham appreciates her accordingly, and has 
 
THE LADIES IN THE LION HOUSE. 279 
 
 given her the position of housekeeper in the Lion House, 
 Women have two great privileges in the Mormon Church — 
 they may ask a man to marry them, if they chance to fancy 
 him, and if they don't like him afterwards they are able to 
 obtain a divorce for the moderate sum of ten dollars, which 
 sum the husband is expected to pay. Mrs. Twiss exercised 
 the first privilege in reference to Brother Brigham, but has 
 not yet availed herself of the last. There are other ladies who 
 thought it would be a great honor to be called the wives of 
 the Prophet, and they have requested him to allow them to be 
 called by his name. This he has done, but he has never 
 troubled them with his society. 
 
 MARTHA BOWKER YOUNG. 
 [Number Seven.] 
 
 Martha Bowker Young is a quiet little body, with piercing 
 dark eyes, and very retiring. Brother Brigham acts towards 
 her as if he had quite forgotten that he had ever married 
 her, and she lives in all the loneliness of married spinster- 
 hood. 
 
 HARRIET BARNEY SEAGERS YOUNG. 
 [Number Eight.] 
 
 Harriet Barney Seagers Young, the eighth wife, is a tall, 
 fine-looking woman. She was another man's wife when Brig- 
 ham made love to her. It is not supposed to be the correct 
 thing for a Saint to court his neighbor's wife, but the Pro- 
 phet did so in the case of Harriet Barney, and in several other 
 cases too. Harriet was married to a respectable young Mor- 
 mon gentleman, but after she had lived with him some time 
 and had borne three children to him, the Prophet persuaded 
 her to join his ranks, and she did so, believing that the word 
 of the Prophet was the revelation of the Lord to her, but she 
 has since had bitter cause to repent of her folly. To a Gen- 
 tile mind such an infatuation must appear very strange, but the 
 Mormon people personally understand the powerful influence 
 which their religion exercises over them, and to them there is 
 nothing very singular in all this. 
 
280 BROTHER BRIGHAm's DOMESTIC ARRANGEMENTS. 
 
 ELIZA BURGESS YOUNG. 
 [Number Nine.] 
 
 Eliza Burgess Young is the only English wife that Brighatn 
 has. She fell in love with the Prophet, wanted him to marry 
 her, and even offered to wait, like Jacob, for seven years if she 
 might be his at last. So she served in the family of her lord 
 for the appointed time, and he finally took her to wife as a 
 recompense for her faithfulness. She has added one son to 
 the Prophet's kingdom. 
 
 SUSAN SNIVELY YOUNG. 
 [Number Ten.] 
 
 The tenth wife on my list is Susan Snively Young. She is 
 a German woman — smart, active, and industrious. She has 
 no children, but has been quite a help-meet to her husband in 
 making butter and cheese, in which she excels. Smart Mor- 
 mons have always had an eye to business, and while living up 
 to their privileges have not invariably sought for wives who 
 were only fair and pleasant to look upon, but have frequently 
 taken them for their own intrinsic worth : — one as a good 
 dairymaid, another as a good cook, a third as a good laun- 
 dress, and a fourth as a lady to grace the parlor— perhaps 
 even two or three of this last kind, if- the Saint were wealthy. 
 There is a good deal of practical wisdom in this. Brother 
 Brigham has gathered of all sorts into his net, and has then 
 sorted them out, placing each lady in the place where he 
 considered she would be most useful and profitable to 
 himself. 
 
 MARGARET PIERCE YOUNG, 
 [Number Eleven.] 
 
 Margaret Pierce Young is very lady-like, tall, and genteel. 
 She has the appearance of being very unhappy, and it is 
 certain that she has been very much neglected, but not more 
 so than many of the other wives. She has one son. 
 
EMMELINE : — A FORSAKEN FAVORITE. 28I 
 
 EMMELINE FREE YOUNG. 
 , [Number Twelve.] 
 
 When first I went to Utah, Emmeline Free Young was the 
 reigning favorite, and she was really the handsomest of 
 Brigham's wives — tall and graceful, with curling hair, beautiful 
 eyes, and fair complexion. Brigham was as fond of her, at 
 the time, as a man of his nature, with such a low estimate of 
 woman, could be. But a younger, though not a handsomer, 
 rival soon captivated hie fickle heart, and he left poor Emmeline 
 to mourn in sorrow. She has never been herself since then, 
 and probably never will be — she is a broken-hearted woman. 
 She is the mother of quite a numerous family, and doubtless, 
 as she had, been the favorite for so long a time, she had come 
 to believe that her husband would never seek another love. 
 But, if this was so, she sadly miscalculated Brigham, for when 
 his licentious fancy was attracted to another object of affec- 
 tion he cast off Emmeline as ruthlessly as he would an old 
 garment. What decent person could refrain from loathing 
 such a man ! How often has my heart gone out in sympathy 
 towards that poor, wrecked woman whom he had forsaken ; 
 what a pity I deemed it that so much love should be wasted 
 upon a creature who could never understand or appreciate it. 
 And yet Emmeline's fate has been no worse than that of the 
 others ; but I was more with her, and saw how keenly she 
 suffered, and I sympathised with her when her sorrows 
 brought her nearly to the point of death. 
 
 AMELIA FOLSOM YOUNG. 
 [Number Thirteen.] 
 
 Amelia Folsorji Young is now the favorite, and it is sup- 
 posed that she will continue to be so, for at last poor Brother 
 Brigham has found a woman of whom he stands in dread. It 
 is doubtful whether he loves her, but nobody in Zion doubts 
 that he fears her. It is said that the Prophet has confided so 
 many of his secrets to Amelia that he is obliged to submit 
 to her tyranny, for fear of her leaving him, and exposing some 
 
282 "PETTICOAT GOVERNMENT" I — THE REIGNING FAVORITK. 
 
 of his little ways which would not bear the light. Be that 
 as it may, it is gefte'rally believed that after all his matrimonial 
 alliances he has at last found his master in the person of 
 Amelia. Even good Saints — ^friends of the Prophet — secretly 
 enjoy the idea of him being at last brought under petticoat 
 government, for it is believed that Brigham used unfair means 
 to obtain her, and that at last he only gained his object by 
 deluding her into the belief that the Lord had revealed to him 
 that it was her duty to become his wife. One thing is very 
 certain — he was as crazy over her as a silly boy over his first 
 love, much to the disgust of his more sober brethren who felt 
 rather ashamed of the folly of their leader. At the theatre a 
 seat was reserved for her at his side, and in the ball-room the 
 same special attention was shown to her. He would open the 
 ball, and, after dancing with each of his other wives who 
 might be present — simply for appearance sake — the remainder 
 of the evening was devoted to her. For all that, his incon- 
 stant heart could not remain faithful to her, and old habits and 
 feelings, to all appearance, have come over him again, and he 
 has gone astray. 
 
 Julia Dean, the actress, was the first to draw him ffotti 
 Amelia's side, and it would have been a sorry day for Amelia 
 if Julia had favored the Prophet's suit. Then the charms of 
 Mary Van Cott touched his sensitive heart, to say nothing of 
 Eliza-Ann, his last but yet not his best-beloved. 
 
 With all this experience, and the constant evidences of the 
 fickleness of Brother Brigham's heart before her eyes, there is 
 no wonder that poor Amelia feels compelled to hold tight the 
 reins, now that they are in her own hands, for, if it is not 
 much to be known as Brigham's wife, it is a great deal to be 
 known as his favorite. As for the future — it is whispiered 
 that Brother Brigham has lately been " setting his house in 
 order," and in the ordinary course of nature, Amelia is almost 
 certain to outlive for many years her aged lord, she therefore 
 can afford to wait for the good time coming. But Amelia 
 knows that she would sink into oblivion if he were to cast hef 
 off for another before his death. 
 
THE LApiES' SIDE OF MORMONISM. 
 
BROTHER BRIGHAM'S LAST BABV. 285 
 
 MARY VAN COTT COBB YOUNG. 
 [Number Fourteen.] 
 
 Mary Van Cott Cobb — who became Brigham's wife after his 
 marriage to Amelia — is a very handsome woman, about 
 twenty-eight years of age. She is tall, slender, and graceful, 
 and h. s been married to the Prophet about six years. At 
 first he appeared to be very devoted to her, but Amelia soon 
 put a stop to that. Nevertheless, she has since her marriage 
 presented a little daughter to her lord, greatly to the annoy- 
 ance of Amelia, who has no children, and who is reported to 
 have said some naughty things about the matter, which was 
 very wrong of her, for Mary Van Cott is known by every one 
 to be beyond reproach or suspicion. She is said to be very 
 unhappy, and though Brigham has provided her with a fine 
 house and every comfort, yet she seldom sees him — not per- 
 haps more than once in three months, or so — though it is 
 generally believed that his spirit is willing, but Amelia won't 
 allow it. 
 
 ELIZA-ANN WEBB bEE YOUNG. 
 [Number Fifteen.] 
 
 Eliza-Ann Webb Dee Young, whose separation from Brig- 
 ham Young has attracted so much public attention has told 
 her own story in her own words which, as it forms an interest- 
 ing page in the biography of the Prophet, I shall now pre- 
 sent, exactly as it was written, to the reader : 
 
 I was living on my father's farm in Little Cottonwood, when, in the summer of 
 1867, Brigham Young informed my father that he wanted me for a wife. Brig- 
 ham, with a number of the Apostles and Elders from this city, was visiting Cot- 
 tonwood on a Sunday and held two meetings for preaching. It was at the close 
 of the forenoon service on that occasion that he walked up to me and saiA 
 " Had I not better accompany you home." I said, " Certainly, if you wish to.'' 
 On the way to my father's house Brigham asked me if I had had any proposals o| 
 marriage since I had obtained a divorce from my first husband. I answered him, 
 " Yes, that I had had several proposals." He then asked if there was any one ol 
 them that I wished to accept. I said, " No," on which he said that he would 
 like to give me a little advice. He advised me not to wait to marry a person 
 whom I loved, but to marry some good man whom I could respect and look u' 
 to and receive good counsel from. "^ 
 
286 THE STORY OF ELIZA- ANN "NUMBER NINETEEN !" 
 
 I thanked him for his counsel, and as my home was so near to the place of 
 meeting, the conversation abruptly terminated. I thought nothing further of it. 
 His brother Joseph and George Q. Cannon joined us at the dinner table, and 
 while there Brigham and the others remarked how youthful I h«d grown since I 
 had got out of my former troubles. As I had much improved in every way I did 
 not regard his observations as any intended compliment or any. indication of 
 what afterwards I learned to be passing in his mind. 
 
 At the close of the afternoon service he went up to my father, took him aside and 
 talked for at least two hours to him about me, and told him how that he had watched 
 me from my infancy, saw me grow up to womanhood, had always loved me and 
 intended to marry me, but having taken Amelia just after the law was passed in 
 Congress prohibiting polygamy, he feared to take another wife soon after, lest it 
 should make trouble, or he would have taken me then. My marriage with a 
 young man was unlooked-for to him, and when he was made acquainted with it 
 he did not just like to stop it, he said, and so he let it go on, but always hoped 
 that the time would come when he would have me. 
 
 He wanted father and mother to use all their influence with me, as it would be 
 
 the best thing I could do. He asked father if a good house, well furnished, and 
 
 $i,ooo a year pocket money would be enough for me, and added that if it was 
 
 • not enough I should have more. Father answered that he thought it would be 
 
 sufficient. 
 
 Brigham stood two hours or more with father and kept the whole of the car- 
 riages that conveyed the party standing waiting till after sundown, and little did 
 I think that I was " the object of interest." 
 
 When father came home he told mother by herself ; then they told me. I 
 cannot describe my feelings ; I was frightened. The thought of it was a per- 
 fect horror. I thought father had gone crazy, and I would not believe his 
 statement for hours. When I realised that it was <t fact I could do nothing 
 but cry. 
 
 The idea of an old man, sixty-seven years of age, the husband of about 
 twenty wives living, asking me, at twenty-two, to be added to the number filled 
 me with the utmost abhorrence, and when I saw that my parents were under his 
 influence and sustained his proposition, 1 was ready to die in despajr. Oh ! the 
 horrible hours tuat I spent in crying and moaning, no tongue can picture. 
 
 When father saw that I took it so badly he told me that I would not be 
 forced into it, but if I could bring my feelings to it and accept Brigham it would 
 be pleasing to him, and mother favored it in the same way. 
 
 About a month after this I was in the city with an intimate lady friend, and as 
 we were walking near to Brigham's house he came to the gate and waited 
 for our arrival. When I saw him I thought that I would get up courage 
 to tell him that I would not marry him, but I could not say it. That peculia. 
 iniluence that he tijrows over everybody when he has a purpose to effect com. 
 pletely overcame me. He did not allude to the subject at all. I shook handi 
 and passed on. 
 
 He became very kind to my parents, and saw father frequently. He sent foi 
 me to come to the city on several occasions and met me at my father's city res- 
 idence, and talked to me about marriage ; told me how pure his feelings were, 
 and that his only motive was to do me good, save me in the kingdom and maki 
 
"NUMBER NINETEEN" TELLS HER OWN STORY. 28/ 
 
 me a queen. All that had no effect upon me ; it only disgusted me the more, and 
 the fear that I dared not resist him never left me. This continued for nearly a 
 year. My eldest brother had had some business transactions with Brigham and 
 one of his sons, which resulted in trouble and ultimately in financial injury to my 
 brother. Brigham had been very angry with him and threatened to cut him off 
 from the Church. I heard of those threats, and believing at that time in Mor- 
 monism, I heard them with deep sorrow, and confess that, in hopes of turning 
 righam's anger away from my brother, I began to entertain the thought that I 
 would yield to his request. I argued as many inexperienced persons do, that as 
 I had had a sorrowful life and my heart was crushed, my future life was nothing, 
 and if I could sacrifice myself for my brother's interest and please my parents, I 
 would at last submit. 
 
 Finally, Brigham named the marriage day and informed me, through my father, 
 that what I required in preparation for my marriage he would furnish ; but 
 I would accept nothing. A day before my marriage he brought me three 
 dress patterns— one silk and two merino — and handed to me a purse with a 
 $y> bill. 
 
 On the April, i86S, I was married to him in the Endowment House by 
 
 Heber C. Kimball, his First Counsellor. My father and mother were present, 
 with others. Brigham's brother Joseph also took to himself a wife at the 
 same time. After the ceremony I walked over with him to the conference, 
 and in the evening I returned to my father's house and remained there for 
 n month. 
 
 For the first few months I had considerable of his attention ; his visits were 
 frequent ; after that his business cares so occupied him, he said, that he 
 could only call about once in three months. After that he came " just as it 
 happened." 
 
 When I was married he wanted my mother to live with me in the city, and a 
 year from the marriage he sent us to take charge of his farm, where we remained 
 till last August, and I removed again into the city. While I was at the farm he 
 came very seldom to see me, and oftentimes while he would visit and look round 
 at the farm he never came into the house. I had caused him no trouble ; indeed, 
 he had said I was the best wife he had, for I had never given him a cross word 
 or look. But for that good temper I take no credit, for my silence was all 
 through fear. I never loved him and never said to him that I loved him. I 
 looked upon him as a heartless despot. 
 
 From the very beginning of my married association with Brigham Young his 
 manner of providing for me was of the meanest character. I had to come up, 
 even from the farm, four miles distant, to the commissary of his family, and was 
 glad when I could get five pounds of sugar, one-quarter oj a pound of tea, a bar 
 ■of soap and a pound of candles. That I would get about once a month. About 
 a year ago I complained to him that I had not sugar enough and he allowed 
 me what I required. 
 
 When I retiimed to the city he furnished me a house in a very ordinary way 
 
 and I continued to live in the best manner I could. But it was the same stingy 
 
 way. When a beef was killed I got some fresh meat ;, but I was frequently 
 
 months without seeing it 
 
 Tired with this maimer of existence, I asked his permission to keep board- 
 
^88. CRUEL TREATMENT OF "ELIZA-ANN." 
 
 ers, with the view of aiding myself and procuring for one of my sons a musical 
 instrument, as he was passionately fond of musip. The permission was granted, 
 and I kept boarders from last March. My house was small, and the business 
 was not very lucrative. I consequently went to him, six weeks ago, and asked 
 him to aid me — to give me some assistan "e to makp life tolerable. He sa.med 
 angry, and complained that he had so m-' ny expenses and that he wanted me 
 to keep myself — to take the money that I h<;d saved to buy an organ for my son 
 and keep myself and family with it. I got a stove out of him, but that was all. 
 During the last year I only obtained from him two calico dresses. This inter- 
 view made me sick and I was in bed for a week, with heart sickness. One of the 
 boarders — ^who was a lawyer — and his wife, asked what ailed me, and I told the 
 story of my troubles and inquired if there was no redress; He said that he 
 thought that there was and he would consult with other lawyers and see what 
 could be done. During all my sickness, while I was his wife, he showed the 
 utmost indifference. He would hear what I had to say, but make almost no 
 answer. Last fall I was attacked with pleurisy^ and I managed to get t^ his 
 office to see him to tell him how ill I was and that I needed some few things; 
 He appeared to comprehend something and finally called " John," the commis- 
 sary for the family, and told him to get me two bits worth of fresh meat. He 
 has not been inside my house for nearly a year. 
 
 While I was feeling bad I read Mrs. Stenhouse's book, and that showed me 
 things in a clearer light than I had seen them before. 
 
 I knew every word was true from my own sad experience, and it encouraged 
 me to leave the ha,teful polygamic life, and I am glad that I have done it 
 
 About five weeks ago I got very weak. I don't know what was the matter 
 with me — probably general debility from grief and mental suffering. My board- 
 ers, seeing my condition, aided me freely and were very kind to me. 
 
 I resolved to leave his house, packed up my clothes and instructed an auction- 
 eer two weeks ago to take away the furniture and sell it, as a part of it was my 
 own, and I thought I was entitled to the rest. The suit commenced has been 
 instituted by my attorneys, who have every confidence that I can obtain alimony ; 
 but whether I do or not I think the world should know Brigham. Young as he is, 
 and my story is a page of his biography. 
 
 This is the story of Eliza- Ann — told in her own words. 
 She is the only wife whom Brigham has not supported ; but 
 she has been allowed to keep Gentile boarders. I suppose 
 Brother Young had some reason when he made this exception. 
 
 •"miss" ELIZA R. SNOW. 
 [Number Sixteen.] 
 
 "Miss" Eliza R. Snow I mention here as I have not fol- 
 lowed the order of' date. She and the three ladies, whose 
 names I shall'presently give, are the proxy wives of Brigham, 
 living with him. Eliza- Ann, who has become notorious of 
 
THE HIOH-PjRIESTESS OF THE SAINTS. ;(9q 
 
 kte, is popularly known as his nineteenth wife. She is his 
 nineteenth living wife and the last-wedded, according to date ; 
 but, if the deceased wives were taken into consideration, she 
 might perhaps be about the thirtieth. In this list I have put 
 all the living wives who are sealed to Brigham " for eternity," 
 first ; and thus I count Eliza- Ann number fifteen ; but had I 
 placed the proxy wives, — who are only Brigham's "for time," 
 in the list, she would, of course, be the nineteenth. The 
 newspapers which have written her into notoriety know noth- 
 ing of " proxy" and " ^iritual " wives. All are alike to them. 
 Eliza Roxy Snow, is always spoken of among the Saints as 
 Miss Eliza R. Snow. I have already mentioned her, and need 
 ' therefore only add that Eliza is the high-priestess and poet- 
 general of the Church ; she is highly thought of by the Saints, 
 and the year before last was one of a company of Mormon^ 
 missionaries who visited the Holy Land, for the purpose of 
 consecrating it to the Lord. Last summer she travelled 
 through the settlements in Utah, urging the women to enter 
 into the " Celestial Order." She is only a proxy wife to Brig- 
 ham, and will belong to Joseph Smith in the resurrection. 
 
 ZINA p. HUNTINGTON JACOBS VOUNG. 
 [Number Seventeen.] 
 
 Zina D. Huntington Jacobs Young is another proxy w:ife, 
 and a widow of the Prophet Josfeph. She, too, will have to rbe 
 handed over in the day of reckoning. She has one grown up 
 daughter, of whom I shall presently speak under rather inter- 
 esting circumstances. 
 
 EMILY PARTRIDGE YOUNG. 
 [Number Eighteen.] 
 
 Emily Partridge Young is a tall, dark-eyed, handsome 
 'Woman, and she also is a "proxy" wife — a relict of Joseph. 
 When Joseph died, Brigham told his wives that they were at 
 liberty to choose whom they would for husbands ; and some 
 of them showed their appreciation of his generosity by. choos- 
 ing him himself. Tkus it was that Emily Partridge .b^capae 
 i8 
 
290 THE CHILDREN OF THE PROPHET. 
 
 Brigham's wife. The Prophet has dealt kindly to his brother 
 Joseph Smith, through her, for she has quite a family of 
 children to be handed over with her. She was young and 
 handsome when the Prophet died, but perhaps it would be 
 wrong to suppose that that had anything to do with Brigham's 
 generosity to his brother, for it is generally believed that he 
 took all those wives of Joseph, from pure principle. 
 
 AUGUSTA COBB YOUNG. 
 [Number Nineteen.] 
 
 Augusta Cobb Young is a very fine-looking woman and 
 must have been quite handsome in her youthful days. As I 
 before stated, she formerly lived in Boston, but hearing Brig- 
 ham preach, she fell in love with him, abandoned her home, 
 children, and husband, and, taking her youngest child with 
 her, went to Salt Lake City, and was married to the Prophet. 
 It was she who, when Brigham began to neglect her, wanted 
 to be sealed to Christ, but was ultimately added to the kingdom 
 of Joseph Smith. 
 
 Now these are the Prophet's wives — his real, living wives — 
 nineteen in all. How many spiritual wives he has had it 
 would be impossible to say. Probably he himself does not 
 know their number. Lately, I believe, he has been making 
 his will, and, if so, I suppose he has "taken count of all." He 
 has besides in various parts of Utah many other wives, who 
 are all more or less provided for, but they are of little account, 
 and he seldom or never sees them. The nineteen whom I 
 have named form his family at home, as I may say — are all 
 under his own roof, or at least they live in Salt Lake City, and 
 are known to every one as his wives. The number of his 
 children it would be very difficult to estimate. I can count 
 up by name between forty and fifty, and I think the Prophet's 
 living children are rather under the latter figure. His- family 
 has however been much diminished by death, though since I 
 went to Utah this has not been the case so much as I believe 
 it was formerly. One Mormon writer — a very reliable and 
 trustworthy man — says that the children that the Prophet has 
 
A GENTILE STORY OF BROTHER BRIGHAM. 29I 
 
 lost would fill a fair-sized graveyard. This very probably may 
 be true, as in the early days of the settlement in Utah, priva- 
 tion and the lack of proper medical attendance must have 
 constantly proved fatal to the young children of the Saints. 
 But it was before my time, and therefore I cannot speak from 
 personal experience. 
 
 A Mormon gentleman one day told me a very funny story 
 in reference to the Prophet and his little family. He said that 
 he had just had occasion to call in at a store in Main street, to 
 make some purchases, when Brigham himself came in and 
 entered into conversation with him. A smart-looking, clever 
 little boy entered the store a few minutes after and handed a 
 note to the proprietor. Brother Brigham seemed to be greatly 
 interested in the child, and asked him several questions in a 
 playful way. Turning at length to my informant he said : 
 
 " That's a nice boy. Brother . Whose child is it .'" This 
 
 was a very awkward question, for the gentleman was aware 
 that the child was one of Brigham's own. He did not like to 
 
 tell him so, so he replied indirectly, " He's one of Mrs 
 
 Young's children. President." The Prophet looked somewhat 
 amused, but did not utter a word in reply. 
 
 I give this story only for what it is worth and no more. 
 The gentleman who told it doubtless expected to be believed ; 
 but knowing the Prophet and his family, as I do, I consider 
 the statement exaggerated, to say the least It is a heavy 
 responsibility to have five and forty children — most of them 
 girls, too — without being accused of forgetting their person- 
 ality altogether. 
 
 In his habits and mode of living, Brigham Voung is very 
 simple, or at least was so until recently. When I first knew 
 him he dressed in plain, homespun, homemade, and every 
 article about his person and his houses, was as plain and 
 unostentatious as could possibly be. But the importation of 
 Gentiles and Gentile goods, since the opening of the railway, 
 has worked a great change. His wives who once carried sim- 
 plicity of dress almost to the verge of dowdyism, have now 
 acquired a taste for Eastern fashions, and I think if Brigham 
 
'2^2 BHIGHAM YOUNG AT HOME. 
 
 *ere a youligfer man and were likely to live another ^ten years 
 he Would find that wives were more expensive luxuries now 
 than they were in the era of "dug-outs" and sun-bonnets. 
 
 'The Prophet's first home in Utah was a little cottage which 
 is now known as the White House. — The same house, I 
 believe, which was valued at sixty thousand dollars, and which 
 Brother Tenant supposed he bought: — a more scandalous and 
 barefaced robbery never was perpetrated. 
 
 This on the hill-side, north of the Eagle Gate, and is now 
 the residence of his first wife, Mrs. Angell Young. The Bee- 
 Hive House is the official residence of Brother Brigham. 
 There he used to reign supreme as "Governor" Young; and 
 thence he now issues secular and ecclesiastical edicts to all who 
 acknowledge his sway. There is one lady resident in this 
 house — Mrs. Lucy Decker Young — and no one else is per- 
 mitted to intrude upon its privacy. Here the prophet has bis 
 own private bedroom, and here he breakfasts when he has 
 been at home over night. 
 
 The Lion House is what ought to be the home of the 
 Prophet, for here nearly all his wives reside. He has, however, 
 many other houses in the city. On the basement floor, the 
 dining-room, kitchen, pantry, and other general offices. The 
 first floor is divided by a long passage with doors on each side. 
 On the right hand, about half a dozen wives with small fami- 
 lies find accommodation. On the left, at the entrance, is the 
 parlor, and the other rooms on that side are occupied by 
 mothers with larger families, and ladies who have a little more 
 than ordinary attention. The upper floor is divided into twenty 
 square bedrooms. 
 
 There is no extravagance in the furniture or apparel of these 
 wives, but they are comfortable and are kept neat and clean. 
 Again and again, the Prophet 'has declared that the ten-dollar 
 fees which are obtained from the divorces provide his wives 
 With pin-money. I do not believe a word of this,, as the 
 amount thus obtained is far more than the avaricious soul of 
 the Prophet would allow to pass out of his hands for feminine 
 vanities. But I know of another source of income which is 
 
INSIDE THE LION HOUSE. 393 
 
 open to the wives. They are allowed all the fruit — peaches 
 especially — which they or their children^ can gather or dry. 
 This, in fact> is pretty nearly their only "pin-money:" theip 
 " lord" is not a generous man, and they have to make the most 
 of trifles. 
 
 The Prophet usually dines in the Lion House at three in 
 the afternoon. Mrs. Twiss Young, as I mentioned before, 
 acts the part of housekeeper, and she acts it well. At three 
 punctually the bell rings and the mothers with their children 
 move down to the dining room. They are all seated at a very 
 long table which is lengthened by turning round at the end of 
 the room. Each mother has her children around her. Brig- 
 ham sits at the head of the table, with his favorite — when at 
 home — vis-a-vis, or on his left, and if a visitor is present he 
 sits at the Prophet's right hand. The repast is frugal but 
 ample, for Brigham is a sober and exceedingly economical 
 man. This is the first time he sees his family. In the even- 
 ing at seven o'clock the bell again rings, and the mothers and 
 the children again fill the sides and end of the parlor. When 
 they are all seated, the patriarch enters, takes his seat at the 
 table and chats quietly with those who chance to go in with 
 him to prayers. When all the members of the family are 
 assembled, the door is closed. All kneel down and the 
 Prophet prays, invoking special blessings upon Zion and "the 
 kingdom." This is the last that his family see of him for the 
 day, unless they have occasion to seek him privately. 
 
 With his family Brother Brigham is said to be kind ; but it 
 is siipposed to be more the awe which his position as Prophet 
 inspires, than the love which they bear him as a man which 
 renders him successful in managing them. At the same time, 
 that sweet familiarity is destroyed which should exist between 
 husband and wife, father and children. With such a number 
 of wives, he cannot possibly wait upon them in visiting, and 
 in the ball-room, and other places of amusement. With the 
 e;cception of his reigning favorite, whoever for the time she 
 may happen to be, no one expects his attentions. At the 
 theatre a full number of seats are reserved, and his wives 
 
294 BOYISHNESS OF THE PROPHET. 
 
 attend, or remain at home, as they please. They sit in the 
 body of the parquette, among the rest of the people ; but on^ 
 of the two proscenium boxes is reserved for him, and beside 
 him is a chair for the favorite Amelia. 
 
 When he goes to the ball, the same special attention is shown. 
 He dances first with the favorite, and, if half a dozen more 
 of his wives have accompanied them, he will dance with each 
 of them once in the course of the evening; but with the 
 favorite he dances as frequently as any youth in the ball-room 
 with his first maiden love. The Apostles and leading men of 
 the community, who dance attendance on him and desire his 
 favor, are sure to seek the pleasure of her hand and place her 
 in the same cotillion with Brigham, who is thus able all the 
 evening to enjoy her company. 
 
 Some of the Apostles and Elders look with pain upon this 
 boyishness of the Prophet, and deplore it. Many of them are 
 attached to their first wives, arid have shown them considera- 
 tion and attention which has not always pleased Brother 
 Brigham. I have heard more than one of them express a wish 
 that the Prophet had been a little more attentive to his own 
 first wife. It is only fair to Amelia — the reigning favorite — 
 to state that she has always been kind and respectful to Mrs. 
 Angell Young. 
 
 Up to . within the last few years the community heard 
 nothing of the Prophet's family but what was strictly decorous 
 and creditable. If there was any wrong-doing ,it must have 
 been very effectually hidden from the knowledge of outside 
 observers. His wives are kind and faithful mothers, seeking 
 to live their religion and ambitious to increase the glory of 
 their Lord. I know them all personally— some of them inti- 
 mately ; and, while I have heard from some, with heavy hearts, 
 of their difficulties in bearing '.'the cross" which all Mormon 
 women have to sustain, they have tried, I know, to be sub- 
 missive, and I think it due to them that I should make this 
 present recognition of their goodness of disposition and purity 
 of soul. 
 
CHAPTER XXI. 
 
 THE ORIGIN OF "THE REFORMATION":— 'EXTRAORDINARY 
 DOINGS OF THE SAINTS. 
 
 Some Peculiar Mormon Doctrines — The Faith of the Saints — Extraordinary 
 Ideas of Sacred Subjects — Polytheism Taught — Preexistence of the Soul — 
 Assisting the Spirits to Emigrate— " The Body that Shall Be "—The Origin 
 of the Devil — Brigham's Adam Deity — "Kolob": — the Sun of Suns — Father 
 Adam Descends to Eden — The Grades of the Priesthood — Place and Position 
 in the Church — Obedience the Cardinal Virtue — Patriarchal Blessings — How 
 ail Ancient Dame Sold Her Petticoats to Buy a Blessing — The Thin End of 
 the Wedge — Terrible Doings in Missouri — Mormon Politics — The Avenguig 
 Angels — Origin of the "Danites" — Whisperings of Dark Deeds — The 
 Bearded "Daughters'" of Zion — Brigham's Threat — The "Death Society " — 
 The Prophet Smith Murdered — "Milking the Gentiles "—" Whittling an 
 Apostate " — Treasonable Speeches and Practices — Brigham as Governor of 
 Utah — Great Excitement in Salt Lake City — A Crisis. 
 
 1^ ROM time to time, in the course of this narrative, I have 
 had occasion to allude to a certain period of^ extraor- 
 dinary fanatical excitement among the Saints in Utah, — a 
 period which was there popularly termed " The Reformation ;" 
 and I think that a brief sketch of the terrible sayings and 
 doings of that time, and the causes which led to them, may 
 be interesting to the reader and may help to explain much 
 which to a Gentile must otherwise be very obscure. 
 
 The popular idea of Mormpnism is that the peculiar feature 
 which distinguishes it from all other Christian sects is Poly- 
 gamy. To a certain extent this is, of course, true-; but it is 
 only a partial statement of the truth. If Polygamy were to 
 be relinquished, it would still be found that Mormonism had 
 really very little in common with other sects, and very much 
 that was completely antagonistic to them. 
 
290 SOME PECULIAR MORMON DOCTRINES. 
 
 The confession of faith published by Joseph Smith during 
 his life-time would certainly deceive an uninitiated person ; and 
 it was in consequence of the ambiguity of that very document 
 that so many unsuspecting persons were from the beginning 
 of Mormonism led astray by the teachings of the Mission- 
 aries. The convert was told that the Mormon faith pro- 
 claimed the existence of one true God, but he was not told 
 that Father Adam was that deity, and that He is "like a 
 well-to-do farmer/' He was told that Christ was the Son of 
 God, but he was not taught that the Virgin Mary was "the 
 lawful wife of God the Father," and that " He intended after 
 the resurrection to take her again, as one of His own wives, to 
 raise up immortal spirits in eternity. He was told of faith in 
 a Saviour, he was not told that men were the only saviours 
 of their wives, and that unless a woman pleased her husband 
 and was obedient and was saved by him, she could not be 
 saved at all. He was told that the Saints believed in the 
 Holy Ghost, but he was not told that "The Holy Ghost is a 
 man ; he is one of the sons of our Father and our God. . . 
 You think our Father and our God is not a lively, sociable, and 
 cheerful man ; He is one of the most lively men that ever lived!" 
 
 And yet, although such fearful and shocking blasphemy 
 was, of course, hidden from the convert whom it was desirable 
 to impress with the idea that Mormonism was only a developi^ 
 ment of Christianity, it was openly taught in the sermons in 
 the Tabernacle before thousands of people, and inculcated in 
 the writing of the highest authorities. The passages, which I 
 have just quoted, were preached in public, were taken down in 
 short-hand, were revised under the superintendence of 
 Brigham Young or one of the chief leaders, were then 
 printed, and published in Salt Lake City, and afterwards 
 reprinted in another form. 
 
 The verbal repetition of such blasphemy as this would be 
 simply painful and disgusting to any right-minded person. I 
 shall therefore endeavor to give an idea of some of these 
 outrageous doctrines without entering too closely into details. 
 Should the reader, howevef, wish to search and see for hiilft- 
 
POLYTHEISM AMONG THE SAINTS. 297 
 
 seff, I refer him to the Journals of Discourses, the files of the 
 Church papers, and the pubUcations of the Mormon writers 
 generally. 
 
 One of the first innovations upon the received faith of 
 ordinary Christians was the doctrine of Polytheism. There 
 can be no doubt that, even in Joseph's time, that doctrine was 
 taught, although, as in the case of Polygamy, all knowledge 
 of it was kept from every one but the initiated — the "strong 
 men " who could be entrusted with the inner secrets of the 
 Church leaders. Thgt such a doctrine, however, was begin- 
 ning, even then, to form part of the faith of the Saints, may 
 be' seen in the following lines upon the occasion of the 
 Pcophet's murder : 
 
 " Unchanged in death, with a Saviour's love, 
 
 He pleads their cause in the courts above. 
 " His home's in the sky, ke dwells with the Gods, 
 
 Far from the furious rage of mobs! 
 
 " He died ! he died for those he loved ; 
 He reigns! He reignsin the realms above." 
 
 Many other instances, even stronger than this, could easily 
 be given. 
 
 The Mormon idea of the other world, while in some respects 
 it differed from the teachings of certain modern " Spiritualists" 
 was not altogether dissimilar. The soul was said to be 
 immortal, and it had three stages of existence. The first was 
 purely spiritual — the state of the soul before it came into this 
 world. Spirits in that condition were not perfect, they must 
 ftrst take a fleshly body, and pass through the trials of life, 
 before they could attain to the highest state of existence. 
 Hence it was a solemn duty, as well as their highest privilege, 
 for men to practice Polygamy: — their duty, as by this means, 
 and by this alone, the yet imperfect souls now waiting to 
 Come into this world could ever hope to be admitted into the 
 "Celestial Kingdom ;" — and a privilege, — as all the souls whom 
 they thus assisted to emigrate would form their own " King- 
 doms" in eternity, over which as kings and priests they 
 would reign for ever and ever 
 
2gS THE MORMON "PLANS OF SALVATION." 
 
 The second stage of the soul's existence is the mortal ; 
 with which we all are sadly well acquainted. The third is 
 the condition subsequent to the Resurrection, when they 
 believe the flesh and bones will form the raised body, but the 
 blood will not be there ; for the blood is the principle of 
 corrupt life, and therefore another spirit supplies its place in 
 heaven. That Christ partook of some broiled fish and part of 
 a honeycomb is evident from Holy Scripture : — the TVIormons 
 therefore teach that heaven will be very much the same as 
 earth, only considerably improved. We shall not marry there 
 or be given in marriage ; hence it is necessary for us to 
 marry here, and to marry as much as we can, for then in 
 heaven a man will take the wives whom he married on earth, 
 or who have been sealed to him by proxy ; they will be his 
 queens, and their children will be his subjects. We shall eat, 
 and drink, and feast, and spend a happy time generally. We 
 shall henceforth never die — hence we shall ourselves be 
 gods! 
 
 It was in the preexistent state, the Mormons teach, that the 
 work of salvation was first planned — but not after the fashion 
 believed by all Christians. A grand celestial council was 
 held, at which all the Sons of God appeared. Michael, the 
 father of all, presided, and stated that he proposed to create a 
 new world, of which he proceeded to give some details. His 
 first-begotten then arose, and made a speech, in which he 
 proposed that Michael, his father, should go down to the 
 world, when created, with Eve, his mother, and do there much 
 after the fashion of what is related of our first parents in the 
 book of Genesis ; he himself would descend some thousands 
 of years subsequently, and would lead his erring brethren 
 back, and save them from their sins. Lucifer, the second son, 
 then stood forth and unfolded /zis plan. Jealous of the 
 popularity of his elder brothei", he proposed to save men in 
 their sins. 
 
 Great discussion ensued, in which the unnumbered family 
 of heaven divided into three parties, — one under each of the 
 two elder sons, and the third standing neutral. After a ter- 
 
THE ORIGIN OF THE DEVIL, THE NEGRO, AND THE WORLD. 299 
 
 rible conflict, Lucifer, the second son was defeated, and, with 
 all his followers, was driven out of heaven. They descended 
 into the abyss, where they founded the infernal Icingdom, of 
 which Lucifer became the chief : — he was henceforth known 
 as the Devil. Adam created his world, and carried out his 
 part of the plan ; and in due time the eldest son, who con- 
 quered in heaven, took upon him the form of flesh, dwelt 
 among men, and was known as their Redeemer. The spirits 
 who stood neutral during the fight subsequently took upon 
 them forms of flesh, entering into the children of Ham, and 
 were known as Negroes. Therefore it is, that although the 
 American Indians and all other races are eligible for the 
 Mormon priesthood, the negro alone can never attain to that 
 high dignity. 
 
 It is only natural, amidst all this confusion of ideas, to ask. 
 Who then is the real Originator of created things .-' 
 
 In the eternity of matter, the Mormons have from the first 
 believed,; but they have supposed that the formation ot 
 worlds and systems had definite dates, although they are 
 unknown to us. ' Far away in the immensity of space is 
 "Kolob" — the great and glorious sun of suns, the abode of 
 the First Principle of Godhead of which we can form any 
 conception. Around that Sun, countless other systems 
 revolve, of which ours is one. That Sun itself may be only 
 one of many other systems whose origin and existence is lost 
 in inconceivable space, and. concerning which we can form no 
 just realisation while in this finite state. From the First 
 Source in "Kolob," other gods have proceeded in precisely 
 the same way as genealogies and " family-trees " have been 
 continued on earth. Each new Patriarchal " god " has formed 
 his own earth out of the aggregation of matter ; and over that 
 earth he reigns. 
 
 On the 9th of April, 1852, Brigham Young publicly 
 announced that — 
 
 « When our father Adam came into the Garden of Eden, he came into it with 
 a celestial body, and brought Eve, one of his wives, with him. He helped to 
 make and organise this world. He is Michael the Archangel, the Ancient of 
 
300 BRIGHAM PUBLICLY TEACHES THAT ADAM IS GOD. 
 
 Days,, about whom holy men have written and spoken. He is. our ' Father and 
 our God,' and the only god with whom we have to do." 
 
 This public declaration gave great offence and led to the 
 apostacy of many. Nevertheless Brigham Young thinks that 
 just as Adam came down to Eden and subsequently became 
 a god, in like manner he, also himself will attain to the god- 
 head. Heber C. Kimball, z^ous to go a step further 
 declared that Brigham was " God," and that he, Kimball, 
 stood towards him in the same relation as the Third Person 
 in the Blessed Trinity does towards the First. 
 
 It will hence be seen that subordination is one of the first 
 principles of the Mormon faith, and this even in the Church 
 organisation of the Saints has been distinctively shown. For 
 the purposes for which it exists the Mormon hierarchy could 
 not be surpassed. Of the Priesthood there are two orders — 
 the Melchisedec and the Aaronic ; of which the former ranks 
 first and highest. The lowest rank in the Church is the 
 " Deacon ; " he looks after the places of meeting, takes up 
 collections, and attends to other similar duties. Next comes 
 the " Teacher" ; — he visits the Saints and takes note of their 
 standing — and reports the same : — weakness of faith or back- 
 wardness in paying tithing is never overlooked by him. After 
 him is the "Priest," and above him is the Elder whose office 
 it is to preach, baptize and lay on hands. All these belong to 
 the order of the Aaronic — or the Levitical priesthood, 
 "Bishops" are simply Church officers having local jurisdiction!. 
 
 The lowest grade in the Melchisedec Priesthood is the 
 " Elder." He administers in all the ordinances of the Church. 
 Above him there is no higher rank as respects the priesthood, 
 but in respect to office there are various gradations, as, for 
 example, the "High Priests," the " Seventies," and "Bishops" 
 who occupy positions of authority, although both go on mis- 
 sion, and also the Apostles. The "Apostles" were chosen in 
 imitation of the "Twelve" appointed by Christ; and in the 
 same way the " Seventies," in imitation of the seventy 
 disciples sent forth»to preach and work miracles. They claim 
 rank next to the Twelve. The "Quorum of the Apostles" is 
 
THE FIRST PRESIDENCY AND THE PATRIARCH. 3OI 
 
 presided over by the eldest of their number ; the " Quorums 
 of Seventies " are each composed of seventy Elders with a 
 "President" and six "Counsellors." The number of "quorums" 
 is unlimited ; and over them all collectively is another presi- 
 , dent and six counsellors. 
 
 The highest authority in the Church is the " First Presi- 
 dency" — the three members of which at present are Brigham 
 Young, George A. Smith, and Daniel H. Wells, — who are 
 said to represent on earth the three Persons of the Blessed 
 Trinity ! • 
 
 As, from "President" Young down to the most illiterate 
 "Elder," every one is supposed to be specially inspired, and to 
 be immediately guided by the gift of the Holy Ghost, educa- 
 tion is utterly unnecessary to the members of the Mormon 
 Priesthood ; in fact it has always been looked upon as an 
 impediment to its possessor. Obedience is considered the 
 highest qualification, and it was the strict enforcement of 
 obedience on the part of the ordinary people and the lower 
 grades of the Priesthood towards the higher that alone could 
 have made possible that state of affairs which existed during 
 the " Reformation." Hence also it is that Brigham Young 
 and the leaders are rightly held responsible for the deeds of 
 violence and fanaticism which their followers may perpetrate ; 
 for it is well known that no Mormon, in a matter of grave 
 importance, would dare to act upon his own responsibility and 
 without he felt sure that what he did would meet with the 
 approbation of those in authority. 
 
 There is another class of Church-officer which I had very 
 nearly forgotten — the Patriarchs. The chief of these is called 
 "The Presiding Patriarch over the Church"; the rest are 
 '' Patriarchs in the Church." The office of these dignitaries 
 is to bless the people and to be paid for their blessings. The 
 price of good blessings is variable. Not long ago, when money 
 was scarce and payments were made in produce, two dollars 
 was considered reasonable ; and if several were wanted for the 
 same family, a reduction was made. Hyrum Smith, the origi- 
 nal Prophet's eldest brother, was the first Patriarch ; and to 
 
302 AN OLD LADY WHO VALUED A BLESSING. 
 
 him succeeded " Uncle John," as he was popularly called — the 
 eldest brother of Brigham ; — the present Patriarch is the son 
 of Hyrum ; still a young man, who obtained his office by 
 inheritance — and this, I believe, is about the only office in the 
 Church which Brother Brigham has permitted the Smith family 
 to inherit or enjoy. 
 
 I Odd as it may seem, some of the people have quite a passion 
 for these " blessings." I knew one old Frenchwoman who was 
 said, like the woman in the parable, in respect to the physi- 
 cians, to have " spent all of her living upon them." I met her 
 one day with a flannel-petticoat under her arm, which she was 
 going to sell. Upon enquiry she frankly told me that she had 
 given her last cent and had sold every scrap of any value which 
 she possessed, and very nearly all her clothes, in order to 
 obtain " blessings," and as she did not understand English she 
 was now going to sell her old petticoat — the very last article 
 of any value which she now possessed — to pay an old dame, 
 who knew a little English, for her services in translating the 
 " blessings." She was in a state of great sorrow at the thought 
 that now her supply of blessings would be stopped — she would 
 have to do without. 
 
 The Patriarchs, however, at no time possessed any particular 
 personal or official weight, and from them never proceeded any 
 of those strange doctrines which excited the people to violence 
 and bloodshed. In a religious sense this outrageous fanati- 
 cism was all originated in the first place in Missouri by some 
 of the more prominent men, such as Sidney Rigdon, Dr. Avard, 
 David Patten, and others, doubtless with the connivance of the 
 Prophet Joseph, not long after the organisation of the Church ; 
 and subsequently by the extreme and preposterous doctrines 
 coristantly inculcated by Brigham Young and some of the 
 leading Elders, among whom Jedediah M. Grant and Heber 
 C. Kimball were the most conspicuous. In a political sense 
 it was the natural result of the peculiar position of the Saints 
 in Missouri, Ohio, and Illinois, and of the ridiculous threats of 
 Brigham Young against the Federal Government, after the 
 exodus of the Mormons to Salt Lake Valley, together with the 
 
THE KINGDOM OF THE SAINTS ON EARTH. 303 
 
 idea which had become popular among the people, that a 
 temporal "kingdom" was to be set up among the Rocky 
 Mountains, and that Christ should personally reign and rule 
 there. 
 
 The idea of reviving the old Jewish polity was always upper- 
 most in the minds of the first teachers. Hence they revived 
 the Priesthood and High-priesthood in their various forms ; a 
 magnificent temple was built in Nauvoo, just as another temple 
 is now being erected at Salt Lake City ; and so far did they 
 go that it was evejj determined that the ancient sacrifices 
 should eventually be restored. At the same time, while the 
 minds of the Mormons, newly-converted and fired with zeal, 
 were bent upon founding the Kingdom of the Saints on earth, 
 the people of Missouri, among whom they dwelt, heard that 
 even in social life the customs of the Jews were to be intro- 
 duced, and that Polygamy was to be practiced. Husbands 
 and brothers trembled for their wives and sisters, and the 
 hatred to the new religion was increased when it was observed 
 that the Mormons in every political movement held all together 
 and voted as one man, thus exercising an influence which no , 
 ordinary religious sect could have possessed or wielded ; this, 
 the discipline of the hierarchy, to which I have already referred, 
 enabled them to do. 
 
 Ill-feeling was shown on both sides ; in a thousand petty 
 ways at first, with more serious results presently. , The Mor- 
 mons were accused of circulating large quantities of base coin, 
 of cheating and defrauding the Gentiles, as they called every- 
 one — even Jews — who rejected the new religion, and of even 
 being guilty of darker crimes ; — which last charge, however, 
 was at first only hinted at. On the other hand, the Mormons 
 accused their enemies of every possible villainy of which men 
 and women could be guilty. The real fact would appear to 
 be that both the Mormons and their enemies were at that 
 time guilty of much wrong-doing against each other, whUe, at 
 the same time, much that was alleged on both sides was utterly 
 groundless, and only originated in the natural jealousy which 
 Western pioneers — rough-and-ready frontiers-men, such as 
 
304 "the avenging angei-s",} — "the danites." 
 
 the people of vtbose .parts then were — would naturally feel 
 when enlisted in two parties,. animated by religious and politi- 
 cal hatred against each other. 
 
 Now came whisperings of still more atrocious deeds. It 
 was alleged that, among the Mormons, a secret body of men 
 had been chosen, who were enrolled, under the most frightful 
 oaths, to avenge every wrong which might be perpetrated 
 against the Saints. This band was said to have originated 
 with Sidney Rigdon and Dr. Sampson Avard, and, as I have 
 somewhere else mentioned, Thomas B. Marsh and Hyde the 
 present chief of the Apostles both made affidavit that such 
 was the case, and that the band was sworn to commit the 
 most shocking acts of vengeance, — and surely Marsh and 
 Hyde ought to know. Various names were chosen for this 
 " death society." First the members were called Daughters 
 of Zion [from Micah iv. 13.J But as it sounded rather ridicu- 
 lous to speak of bearded ruffians as ' daughters,' that name 
 was abandoned, and the title " Avenging Angels " substituted ; 
 and that, with some other names then temporarily used, were 
 subsequently dropped for the name " Danites " [from Genesis 
 xlix. 17,] which has since been retained; — not by the Mor- 
 mons, for they have ever denied the existence of any such 
 band, but by the Gentiles. 
 
 It matters very little what the name of such a society might 
 be, so long as it existed at all ; and that it does, and has, ex- 
 isted in some form cannot reasonably be denied. There pro- 
 bably is not at the present time any formally enrolled society, 
 but it is quite certain that for many years past if "The 
 Church" had only dropped a hint that any man's blood 
 ought to be shed, that man would have had a very short 
 tenure of his life. Even Brighara himself said publicly: 
 
 "If men come here and do not behave themselves, they will not only find the 
 Danites, whom they talk so much about, biting the horses' heels, but the sconn- 
 drels will find something biting their heels. In my plain remarks I simply call 
 things by their own names." 
 
 It is beyond a doubt that, notwithstanding all the social 
 changes and improvements of late years, the secret police of 
 
SAINTLY' NOTIONS OF THE RIGHTS OF PROPERTY. '305 
 
 Salt Lake City are in matters of crime, as well as in fact, 
 though not perhaps nominally, the successors of the original 
 " death society ;" — many of its members are known to have 
 committed grievous crimes and to have repeatedly dyed their 
 hands in blood. The shocking deeds that every now and then 
 are divulged to the world are all of their doing, and no resid- 
 ent of Salt Lake City, whether Mormon or Gentile, although 
 he might prudently decline to state his opinions, would in his 
 mind question the fact that it is fear of consequences, and only 
 because the Saints are "on their good behavior" in the sight 
 of the Federal Government, that the hands of these wretches 
 are withheld from a continuance of their old enormities. ' 
 
 As might be supposed, the establishment of a secret band 
 of men professedly ready at a moment to steal, to shed blood, 
 or commit any crime at the command of their leaders created 
 great excitement in the whole State of Missouri, and especially 
 in the vicinity of the Mormon Settlements. 
 
 Like the Ishmaelites of old, the hands of the Saints were 
 against every man, and every man's hand was against them. 
 They were taught that they were " a chosen nation, a royal 
 priesthood, a peculiar people" — the " Sword of the Lord and 
 of Gideon" was to be theirs ; they were to go forth conquering 
 and to conquer ; and the Gentiles were to be trodden down 
 beneath their feet. 
 
 As might be expected, trouble immediately arose ; the peoplfe 
 of Missouri outraged the Mormons, and the Mormons in return 
 outraged them. Murders, thefts, and the most shameful 
 attocities were of daily occurrence, and the history of those 
 terrible doings would fill a good-sized volume. Suffice it to say, 
 that the excitement continued and increased, reprisals being 
 made on both sides ; finally the mob was triumphant, and after 
 committing many fearful excesses it was organised into a 
 militia — the leading men in authority declaring that the Mor- 
 mons mUst either leave the State or else they must be extir- 
 pated by the sword. 
 
 Notwithstanding all this, the Mornions, at all times an 
 industrious people, were in one s^nse successful and prosper- 
 
 19 
 
306 "WHITTLING OUt" A GENTILE. 
 
 ous ; the morality, however, of some of their leading men was 
 -to say the least very questionable. It was openly argued that 
 the silver and gold were the Lord's, and so were the cattle on 
 a thousand hills. The Scripture says that God has given his 
 people all things richly to enjoy. The Saints were the people 
 of God : — He had given them all the wealth and substance of 
 the earth, and therefore it was no sin for them to help them- 
 selves — they were but taking their own. To over-reach or 
 defraud their enemies was facetiously called by the Mormons 
 " milking the Gentiles." 
 
 Their city called Nauvoo — The Beautiful, — a name given 
 by the Prophet Joseph and supposed to be of celestial origin, 
 was well laid out and well built, a costly Temple was nearly 
 complete, and the leaders, at least, began to show signs 
 of wealth and prosperity. This however was but the lull 
 before the storm. Writs upon various charges against Joseph 
 and the leading Elders had always been floating about, and 
 the serving of some of the later ones had only been prevented 
 by technical difficulties or the personal fears of the Sheriff. 
 To enter Nauvoo for the purpose of arresting the Prophet was 
 like bearding the lion in his den ; for by this time one of the 
 best-equipped and best-drilled militia regiments under the 
 name of the Nauvoo Legion had been organised, and Joseph 
 had been elected Lieutenant-General. The regiment con- 
 sisted solely of well-tried Mormons who were devotedly 
 attached to their leader ; besides which, the whole of the 
 population of the city was at his call at a moment's notice. 
 
 Into the city of the Saints, as far as was possible to, prevent 
 it, no Gentile was allowed to intrude. It was at risk of life 
 and property that any one ventured. One oddly original 
 mode of driving out the devoted stranger is worthy of mention 
 — it was called " whittling a man out of the town !" Oppo- 
 site the victim's door a number of men and overgrown boys 
 would take up their quarters — each armed with a stout stick 
 of wood and a huge knife. No sooner did the Gentile appear 
 than the whole horde gathered in a circle round him. Not a 
 word was uttered, but each man grasping iirmly his stick in 
 
THE APOTHEOSIS OF THE PROPHET JOSEPH. 30/ 
 
 his left hand, pointed its- other end to within a few inches of 
 the victim's face, while with the knife in his right hand he 
 sliced a shaving out of the wood in such a way as to bring the 
 point of the knife almost against the face of the unfortunate 
 man. Wherever he turned they attended him, always preserv- 
 ing the strictest silence, and never actually touching him. 
 The intolerable sensation caused by the " whittling " of this 
 strange body-guard — who were in attendance day and night — 
 and the unpleasantness of seeing half a score of sharp knives 
 flashing perpetually within an inch of his nose generally sub- 
 dued the strongest-minded Gentile — few could endure it for 
 more than a day or so at the utmost : they were glad to leave 
 — " Whittled out of the town !" 
 
 The evil day, however, at last came. The Prophet, fear- 
 ing arrest, fled, but was persuaded to return and deliver 
 himself up. The charge against him was one for which 
 reasonable bail could be taken : bail was offered, accepted, 
 and the prisoners discharged. Before leaving court, how- 
 ever, the Prophet and his brother Hyrum, the Patriarch, 
 were arrested upon a trumped-up charge of treason — a charge 
 for which it was impossible that bail should be taken ; they 
 were therefore committed to custody in Carthage jail, under 
 solemn promise from Governor Ford of Illinois that the 
 State should be answerable for their personal protection. 
 The same day, however, a mob of over one hundred men, 
 assisted, it is said, by the militia who were left in charge, 
 burst into the jail and assassinated the Prophet and his 
 brother. 
 
 As might be supposed this outrage by no means weakened 
 the Mormon cause — their :f rophet was now a martyr, and his 
 name more powerful after death than it could possibly have 
 been had he lived. It was, however, clearer than ever that 
 nothing could now reconcile the people of Illinois to the 
 Mormons, and the latter seriously began to think of leaving 
 that State in a body as they had formerly left Missouri. 
 
 The terrible doings of those times I have no idea of relat- 
 ing just now— I simply allude to them in order that the reader 
 
308 "ZION' IN SALT LAKE VALLEY FOUNDED. 
 
 may understand how, in the excitement produced iff that 
 border-warfare, it was possible for such strange events as 
 afterwards transpired in Utah to originate. I may simply add, 
 that the Temple being completed, and the first " Endow- 
 ments" given there, the people gathered up what little pro- 
 perty they could rescue from the mob, and under the guid- 
 ance of Brigham Young, and amidst privations, sufferings, 
 and outrages of the most painful character, left the city which 
 they had founded in Illinois and set out for the Rocky Moun- 
 tains, where, beside the Great Salt Lake, they founded their 
 modern Zion. 
 
 Free now from the violence of mobs and Gentile enmity, it 
 might have been supposed that the hatred which had so long 
 been part of the Mormon faith would have died a natur^ 
 death. The contrary, however, was the case. The Mexican 
 war was then raging, and, en route to the Rocky Mountains, 
 the Mormons had received a proposal from the Federal 
 Government that they should supply a regiment, upon highly 
 advantageous conditions, to join the United States troops 
 which were then operating in California. This suggestion 
 was kindly made, for it was thought that the Mormon regi- 
 ment thus raised would in reality be only marching their own , 
 way in going to California, and that the outfits, pay, arms, &e., 
 which were to be theirs, after the year for which they were 
 enrolled had expired, would be of essential service to thefii. 
 It was like paying men liberally for making a journey for 
 their own benefit. 
 
 Notwithstanding all this, Brigham Young and the leaders 
 represented the transaction in quite another "light, and the 
 people were taught that an engagement, into which they had 
 entered of their own free will, and from which they had 
 derived substantial advantages, was an act of heartless cruelty 
 and despotic tyranny on the part of the Government. This 
 feeling was fostered, until at length the Saints as a body 
 regarded themselves as a wronged and outraged people, and 
 considered every Gentile— in fact the whole nation as their 
 natural enemies. This was perhaps all the more singular. 
 
TROUBLOUS TIMES AMONG THE MORMONS. 309 
 
 since, after the vast tract of country, of which Utah forms a 
 part, had, at the end of the war, been wrested from Mexico, 
 Brigham Young had been appointed by President Millard 
 Fillmore the first Governor and Indian Agent of the terri- 
 tory ; he was therefore in Federal pay, and bound, as long as 
 he retained office, to support the Government, or at the very 
 least not to stir up disaffection. 
 
 Trouble soon arose between Governor Young and the 
 Mormons on one side and the Judges and United States 
 courts and officials on the other. Once an armed mob burst 
 into the Supreme Court, and forced the Judge then sitting to 
 adjourn ; at another time a bonfire was made of the books and 
 papers of the District Courts ; then a Judge on the bench 
 was threatened with personal outrage ; and subsequently a 
 fosse summoned by legal (!) process " encamped " for a whole 
 fortnight over against another posse summoned without legal 
 process, the two bodies burning with bitter hatred and breath- 
 ing out threatenings and slaughter. Such a state of affairs 
 could not, of course, last long. On the one side the wildest 
 statements were publicly made against the Government ; 
 threats which uttered by a little band of pioneers against a 
 mighty nation were perfectly ridiculous, stirred up the hearts 
 of the Saints. On the other hand it was pretty certain that 
 Federal troops would have to be sent out to Utah to preserve 
 the peace of the Territory. The Federal Government was 
 nevertheless defied, abused, and derided, and the people, 
 thoroughly blinded by their fanaticism, did not for a moihent 
 doubt that should Governor Young "declare war" the United 
 States troops would vanish before the "Armies" ©f the Saints 
 like chaff upon the threshing-floor. So absurd does all this 
 appear that I should really hardly venture to repeat it were it 
 not that every one in Utah — Mormon and Gentile — knows 
 that I am really understating facts rather than otherwise. 
 
 Now came a crisis in Mormon history, for which all these 
 wild sayings and unlawful doings had been so long paving the 
 way : — " The Reformation '' was destined to be the crowning 
 point of Saintly folly and Saintly sin. 
 
CHAPTER XXII. 
 
 THE "REIGN OF TERROR" IN UTAH :— THE REFORMATION 
 OF THE SAINTS. 
 
 Days of Trouble in the Valley — Shedding Innocent Blood — What is Murder ? 
 About Killing a Cat — Better than Their Faith — Cutting Throats for Love — 
 The Deeds of the Apostle "Jeddy"— The Celebrated Mule— The Saints 
 Accused — Missionaries Called Home — Their Consciences Accuse Them! — 
 The Blood-Atonement — What was Said in the Tabernacle — Terrible Doctrines 
 Taught — Brigham a " God " ! — Fearful Blasphemy of Brigham Young — The 
 Shedding of Blood — "Righteously Murdered — The Principles of Eternity- 
 Deeds of Darkness — A "Saint" Murders His Wife — A Terrible Story — How 
 Children Were Married — ^A Petticoat on a Fence-Pole — A Scarcity of Un- 
 married Girls — Obeying "Counsel" — Propositions of Marriage — A Trifling 
 Mistake — Stubborn Facts and Figures — The Most Fearful Deed of All. 
 
 THE people were now thoroughly excited. Their religious 
 antipathy, their political hatred — two of the most power- 
 ful passions which move individuals or bodies of men — had 
 been appealed to, and both in public and private they had 
 been stirred up to a pitch of frenzy which it is hardly possible 
 at the present time to comprehend. 
 
 There were whisperings now of a most fearful doctrine, 
 calculated not only to strike terror into the hearts of those 
 whose faith was weakening, but even to shock with a sense 
 of horror those who only heard of it from afar — I mean the 
 doctrine of the Blood Atonement. 
 
 The Saints had all along been taught to distinguish between 
 murder aiid the shedding of innocent filood — the former being 
 
THE "UNPARDONABLE SIN" DEFINED. 3H 
 
 spoken of as a crime for which atonement might be made, 
 but for the latter there was no repentance on earth — it was 
 an unpardonable sin. They were also taught to distinguish 
 carefully between sins which might be forgiven, and sins for 
 which pardon was impossible. Now the difference between 
 murder and shedding innocent blood is this : — the latter is the 
 crime of killing a Saint, which can never be forgiven, but by 
 the death of the transgressor ; but the former is of quite a 
 different character. To murder a Gentile may sometimes be 
 inexpedient, or perhaps even to a certain extent wrong, but it 
 is seldom, if ever, a df'ime, and never an unpardonable sin. 
 
 A friend of mine was in a state of apostacy. The Bishop 
 went to her to expostulate, and told her that if he were her 
 husband he would get rid of her and take away her children 
 as well — he would not on any account live with her. . 
 
 " Perhaps," she said, " you would not allow me to live at 
 all.?" 
 
 " Certainly not," he replied. " I would think about as much 
 of killing you or any other miserable Apostate as I would 
 about killing a cat. If Brigham Young were to tell me to put 
 you to death I would do it with the greatest of pleasure ; — 
 and it would be for your good, too." • 
 
 Thus, when the famous Revelation on Polygamy says that 
 a man cannot be pardoned for shedding innocent blood, it 
 does not mean that he cannot be pardoned for murdering a 
 Gentile or an Apostate ; for that, under some circumstances, 
 might even be meritorious ; but that the murder of a Saint by 
 one of the brethren cannot under any circumstances be for- 
 given on earth, and that his only chance of forgiveness lies 
 in his own blood being shed as an "atonement." 
 
 Certain sins cannot be forgiven here on earth — Shedding 
 innocent blood, divulging the secrets of the Endowment 
 House — marital unfaithfulness on the part of the wife — 
 Appstacy ; — these are unpardonable. All other crimes which 
 Gentiles abhor may become even virtues, if done in the cause 
 of the Church. I do not, of course, mean to say that the mass 
 of the Mormon people act up to such atrocious doctrines ; for 
 
312 THE BLOOD ATONEMENT, 
 
 ^though, when among themselves, they would admit that the 
 theory was correct, the better instincts of their nature keep 
 them from even putting that theory into practice. But what 
 I do mean to say is, that such doctrines have, over and over 
 again, been distinctly taught in the plainest words in the public 
 hearing of thousands; that they have been printed and re- 
 printed by authority ; that they have been practiced, and the 
 very highest of the Mormon leaders have applauded ; and that, 
 even at the present moment, these doctrines form part of the 
 dogmas of the Church. It is this day a matter of fact, and 
 not a matter of question, that if any Mormon Apostate were 
 to commit any of the unpardonable sins which I have men- 
 tioned, and if he or she were to be assassinated by a private 
 individual, all zealous Mormons — all the leaders — would 
 maintain that not only was the deed justiiiable but even 
 meritorious ! 
 
 This may seem bad enough, but it is not the worst. The 
 doctrine of the " Blood Atonement " is that the murder of 
 an Apostate is a deed of love ! If a Saint sees another leave 
 the Church, or if even he only believes that his brother's faith 
 is weakening and that he will apostatise before long, he knows 
 that the soul of his unbelieving brother will be lost if he dies 
 in such a state, and that only by his blood being shed is there 
 any chance of forgiveness for him ; it is therefore the kindest 
 action that he can perform toward him to shed his blood — the 
 doing so is a deed of truest love. The nearer, the dearer, the 
 more tenderly loved the sinner is, the greater the affection 
 shown by the shedder of blood — the action is no longer mur- 
 der or the shedding of innocent blood, for the taint of apostacy 
 takes away its. innocence — it is making atonement, not a 
 crime; it is an act of mercy, therefore meritorious. 
 
 These were the terrible teachings which the "Reformation" 
 brought to light: — they had been whispered before among the 
 elect, and had been acted upon by the "Avenging Angels," 
 but before this they had never been publicly and intelligibly 
 explained. 
 . . As I before said, the Saints had been excited to a condition 
 
THE REIGN OF TERROR IN UTAH. 313 
 
 of frenzy and were ready to engage in any fanatical folly, but 
 the way in which the spark was applied to the powder was as 
 ridiculous as its results were terrible. 
 
 Jedediah M. Grant, an enthusiast of the wildest kind ; a man 
 without education or mental discipline of any description ; one 
 of the First Presidency and high in authority among the 
 Saints, had occasion to attend a meeting which was held at 
 Kaysville, a place about twenty-five miles distant from Salt 
 Lake City, and he invited some of the Elders to meet him 
 there to take part jn the proceedings. To one of these, 
 "Jdddy" as he was familiarly called, obligingly lent a mule; 
 he himself did not accompany the party but went on before. 
 These Elders were pretty well mounted and one of them being 
 a good horseman made the rest keep up with him. In conse- 
 quence of this when they arrived at Kaysville the beasts were 
 heated and tired. The Apostle " Jeddy" watched them but 
 said nothing. 
 
 Up to a Certain point, the meeting passed off pleasantly 
 enough — the Elders present were "good at testimony" and 
 strong in exhorting their hearers to faithfulness. Jeddy was 
 the last speaker. He began in his usual way, but presently 
 warmed up until he became quite excited and then proceeded 
 to accuse every one present of all sorts of wrong-doing. The 
 Elders who had preceded him came in for their full share ; hp 
 denounced them for their inconsistency and hypocrisy, and 
 bitterly upbraided then! for running his mule and their own 
 beasts in such a manner. The Bishop of the place and his 
 counsellors he accused of inactivity and carelessness ; and he 
 called loudly upon every one present to repent and do their 
 first works ; threatening them with the speedy judgments of 
 Heaven. 
 
 All this was well enough if it had stopped there, for it might 
 have been taken for just what it was — an ebulition of temper 
 on the part of "Jeddy" who was naturally vexed that his mule 
 had been over-heated. But like many other manias and epi- 
 demics, this Mormon movement began with a most insignifi- 
 cant trifle, and the spirit of fiery denunciation became perfectly 
 
314 THE " REFOKMATION" :— EXCITEMENT AMONG THE SAINTS. 
 
 contagious. Another meeting was held in the course of a few 
 weeks, and then the mutual accusations of those who were 
 present became, if possible, more bitter than before; the 
 "Saints" were denounced as the vilest of sinners and they 
 were all commanded to be re-baptized. Accordingly, after the 
 meeting, although it was night and the weather was cold, a 
 considerable number were immersed by the Elders, and Jeddy 
 himself was so enthusiastically engaged in the performance 
 that he remained in the water so long that he got a thorough 
 chill alid contracted the disease of which he died. 
 
 Sunday after Sunday similar scenes were repeated in the 
 Tabernacle, until, had it not been painful, the whole affair 
 would have been ludicrous in the extreme. Every one had 
 strayed from the path of duty, and the fact was announced in 
 the strongest terms. People were called upon by name to 
 publicly confess their sins, and many were then and- there" 
 pointed out and accused of crimes of which they were entirely 
 guiltless but which they dared not deny. In the midst of all 
 this, the duty of implicit obedience to the Priesthood and the 
 payment of tithes was loudly insisted upon. 
 
 Then Missionaries were sent out all over the territory armed 
 with the full authority of the Priesthood and also a catechism 
 which, on account of its obscene character, has since been 
 bought up so successfully by Brigham that it is doubtful if 
 there is a copy in existence. The Mormons have a curious 
 way of appointing Missionaries. If ,a man is weak in the 
 faith, a depraved bad man, or even a youth with wild tenden- 
 cies and inclined to sow his wild oats a little too luxuriantly, 
 he is sent on his travels to preach the Gospel: — nothing 
 strengthens a man's faith, it is thought, more than having to 
 defend it from the opposition of unbelievers, and the enforced 
 good example which the Missionary is obliged to set will, it is 
 said, produce a salutary effect upon the exuberance of youth 
 or the depravity of more mature years. In the present instance 
 many of the Missionaries thus sent forth were known to be 
 as immoral as they were grossly ignorant. 
 ^ There was one terrible meeting at which Brigham himself 
 
SELF-CONVICTED. 
 
 31S 
 
 was put to the blush. Men of note were there — no one was 
 present who did not belong to the Priesthood. "Jeddy" held 
 forth, and Heber and Brigham were strong upon the occasion. 
 In the midst of the proceedings, Brother Brigham, full of con- 
 fidence, in the plainest words called upon all who could not 
 plead guiltless of certain crimes to stand up. Three-fourths 
 of those present immediately arose. Utterly shocked, the 
 Prophet entered into explanations; but self-convicted these 
 three-fourths of his hearers stood conscientiously firm. Even 
 Brigham saw the necessity of taking some stringent measures. 
 The Saints were tolcf that if they were re-baptized their sins 
 would be washed away and they could then say they were not 
 guilty of the crimes suggested in the catechism. Subsequently 
 the catechism itself was, as I said, bought up and burnt. 
 
 The burden of every sermon was unquestioning obedience, 
 repentance, payment of tithing, and above all the taking of 
 more wives. The Missionaries, without the slightest ceremony, 
 would visit the houses of respectable Saints, examine them 
 out of the abominable catechism, and question husbands and 
 wives in the presence of their children about even their very 
 thoughts, in a manner, and upon subjects, which would amply 
 have justified their being hung up to the nearest tree — Lynch 
 law was in fact too good for such atrocities. Wicked ideas, the 
 utterance of which would have called forth a blush even if 
 heard from the lips of a drunken rowdy in a pot-house, were 
 suggested and explained to young children ; while it would 
 have been literally at the risk of life for their parents to have 
 expostulated: — to do so would have shown want of faith, and 
 want of faith would have justified some fanatical scoundrel in 
 using his knife or his pistol for the loving purpose of cut- 
 ting off his brother's soul from earth in order to save it in 
 heaven ! 
 
 Meanwhile, Jedediah did not for a moment cease his exhor- 
 tations, the work must be done thoroughly: the Blood-Atone- 
 ment must not be forgotten. On one occasion, in the 
 Tabernacle, this crazy fanatic said : — 
 
 "I would advise some of you men here to go to President Young, and confess 
 
gl6 THK BLOOD OF OFFENDERS tO BE SHED. 
 
 your sips, and ask him to take you outside the city and have your blood shed to 
 atone for your sins." 
 
 " There are men and women that I would advise to go to the President imme- 
 diately, and ask him to appoint a committee to attend to their case ; and then let 
 a place be selected, and let that committee shed their blood. . . , < 
 
 "I would ask how many covenant-breakers there are in this city and in this 
 kingdom? I believe that there are a great many; and if they are covenant- 
 breakers, we need a place designated where we can shed their blood." 
 
 " We have been trying long enough with this people, and I go in for letting 
 the sword of the Almighty be unsheathed, not only in word but in deed." 
 
 Lest he should be mistaken he said : 
 
 " What ought this meek people who keep the commandments of God do unto 
 them ? ' Why,' says one, 'they ought to pray the Lord to kill them.' I want to 
 know if you would wish the Lord to come down and do all your dirty work? 
 When a man prays for a thing, he ought to be willing to perform 
 it himself. .... Putting to death the transgressors would exhibit the 
 law of God, no matter by whom it was done." 
 
 Heber C. Kimball, the " model Saint," after a speech to the 
 same effect, in which, as usual, he made use of the most dis- 
 gusting language, added : 
 
 "Joseph Smith was God to the inhabitants of the earth when he was among 
 us, and Brigham is God now ! " 
 
 But more shocking than any other was the language of 
 B-righam Young himself. On the 2 1 St of September, 1856, in 
 a discourse delivered in the Bowery, Great Salt Lake City, and 
 afterwards re-printed by authority in the Journals of Dis- 
 courses, Vol. .IV., pp. 53-4, he said : 
 
 " The time is coming when justice will be laid to the line and righteousness to 
 the plummet ; when we shall take the old broadsword, and ask, 'Are you for 
 God ?' and if you are not heartily on the Lord's side, you will be hewn down .'" 
 
 " There are sins that men commit for which they cannot receive forgiveness in 
 this world or in that which is to come ; and if they had their eyes opened to see 
 their true condition, they would be perfectly willing to have their blood spilt upon 
 the ground, that the smoke thereof might ::scend to Heaven as an offering for 
 thei" sins, and the smoking incense would atone for their sins ; whereas, if such 
 is not the case, they will stick to them and remain with them in the spirit world. 
 ~ " I know,: when you hear my brethren telling about cutting people off from the 
 earth, that you consider it is strong doctrine ; but it is to save them, not to 
 
 destroy them 
 
 " I do know that there are sins committed of such a nature that, if the people 
 
BRIGHAM young's INTERPRETATION OF SCRIPTURE. '3 If 
 
 did understand the doctrine of salvation, they would tremble because of their 
 situation. And, furthermore, I know that there are transgressors who, if they 
 knew themselves, and the only condition upon which they can obtain forgiveness, 
 would beg of their brethren to shed their blood, that the smoke thereof might 
 ascend to God as an offering to appease the wrath that is kindled against them, 
 and th'i.t the K;w might have its course. I will say, further, I have had men come 
 to me and offer their lives to atone for their sins. 
 
 " It is true that the blood of the Son of God was shed for sins through the fall 
 and those committed by men, yet men can commit sins which it can never remit. 
 As ;t v.-:is in ancient days, so it is in our day ; and though the principles are 
 taught publicly from this stand, still the people do not understand them ; yet the 
 law is precisely the same. There are sins that can be atoned for by an offering 
 upon an altai, as in ancieift days ; and there are sins that the blood of a lamb, 
 of a calf, or of turtle doves cannot rehiit, but they must be atoned for by the blood 
 of the man." 
 
 One would have supposed that even Brigham had now 
 reached the culminating point of horror and blasphemy, But 
 no ; — a month or so later he even surpassed himself when in a 
 Tabernacle sermon he said : 
 
 " When will we love our neighbors as ourselves ? In the first place, Jesus 
 said that no man hateth his own flesh. It is admitted by all that every person 
 loves himself. Now if we do rightly love ourselves we want to be saved, and 
 continue to exist, we want to go into the kingdom where we can enjoy eternity, 
 and see no more sorrow nor death. This is the desire of every person who 
 'believes in God. Now take a person in this congregation who has knowledge 
 with regard to being saved in the kingdom of our God and our Father, and being 
 exalted, one who knows and understands the principles of eternal life, and sees 
 the beauties and excellency of the eternities before him compared with the vain 
 and foolish things of the world, and suppose that he is overtaken in a gross fault, 
 that he has committed a sin that he knows will deprive him of that exaltation 
 •which he desires, and that he cannot attain to it without the shedding of his 
 blood, and also knows that by having his blood shed he will atone for that sin 
 and be saved and exalted with the gods, is there a man or a woman in this house 
 but would say, ' Shed my blood that I might be saved and exalted with the 
 gods ? ' 
 
 "All mankind love themselves : and let those principles but be known by an 
 individual, and he would be glad to have his blood shed. This would be loving 
 ourselves even unto an eternal exaltation. Will you love your brothers or sisters 
 likewise when they have a sin that cannot be atoned for without the shedding of 
 their blood ? Will you love that man or woman well enough to shed their blood ? 
 That is what Jesus Christ meant. He never told a man or woman to love their 
 enemies in their wickedness, never. He never meant any such thing ; His lan- 
 guage is left as it is for those to read who have the spirit to discern between 
 truth and error ; it was so left for those who can discern the things of God. 
 Jesus Christ never meant that we should love a wicked man in his wickedness. 
 
 ^ I could refer you to plenty of instances where men have been righteously slain in 
 
3i8 "out of love he cut her throat!" 
 
 order to atone for tJieir sins. I have seen scores and hundreds of people for whom 
 there would have been a chance (in the last resurrection there will be) if their 
 lives had been taken and their blood spilled on the ground as a smoking incense 
 to the Almighty, but who are now angels to the devil, until our elder brother, 
 Jesus Christ, raises them up and conquers death, hell, and the grave. 
 
 "I have known a great many men who have left this Church, for whom there 
 is no chance whatever for exaltation, but if their blood had been spilled it would 
 have been better for them. 
 
 " The wickedness and ignorance of the nations forbid this principle being in 
 fulj force, but the time will come when the law of God will be in full force. This 
 is loving our neighbor as ourselves ; if he needs help, help him ; if he wants 
 salvation, and it is necessary to spill his blood on the earth in order that he may 
 ber saved, spill it. 
 
 '" Any of you who understand the principles of eternity, if you have sinned a 
 sin requiring the shedding of blood, except the sin unto death, should not be 
 satisfied or rest until your blood should be spilled, that you might gain that 
 salvation you desire. That is the way to love mankind. . . . Light and 
 darkness cannot dwell together, and so it is with the kingdom of God. 
 
 " Now, brethren and sisters, will you live your religion ? How many hundreds 
 of times have I asked that question ? Will the Latter-Day Saints live their 
 religion ? " 
 
 And SO, according to Brigham Young, their Prophet, this 
 was the religion of the Saints ! And the people acted up to 
 the " religion " thus taught : and the story is so terrible that 
 one dare not even whisper all its details. 
 
 It is no secret that all this was understood /zV^ns//;'. The wife 
 of one Elder, when he was absent on a mission, acted unf aithr 
 fully towards him. Her husband took counsel of the authori- 
 ties, and was reminded that the shedding of her blood alone 
 could save her. He returned and told her, but she asked for 
 time, which was readily granted. One day, in a moment of 
 affection, when she was seated on his knee, he reminded her 
 of her doom, and suggested that now when their hearts were 
 full of love was a suitable time for carrying it. into execution. 
 She acquiesced, and ozii of love he cut her throat from ear to ear. 
 
 In many instances the outrages committed against persons 
 who were known to be innocent were so revolting that no 
 woman — nay, even no right-minded man — would venture, to 
 more than just allude to them. A few however, and only a 
 few, and they by no means the worst, of the milder cases, I 
 will just mention. 
 
THE BLOOD ATONEMENT: — A VICTIM. 319 
 
 There was the murder of the Aikin party — six persons — 
 who were killed on their way to California. The same year a 
 man named Yates was killed under atrocious circumstances ; 
 and Franklin McNeil who had sued Brigham for false impris- , 
 onment and who was killed at his hotel door. There was 
 Sergeant Pike, and there was Arnold and DrownJ There 
 was Price and William Bryan at Fairfield ; there was Almon 
 Babbitt, and Brassfield, and Dr. Robinson; there was also 
 James Cowdy and his wife and child, and Margetts and his 
 wife ; and many another, too, — to say nothing of that frightful 
 murder at the Mountain Meadows. 
 
 Besides these there is good reason to think that Lieutenant 
 Gunnison and his party were also victims, although it was 
 said that they were shot by " Indians." The Potter and Parrish 
 murders were notorious ; Forbes, and Jones and his mother, 
 might be added to the same list ; the dumb boy, Andrew 
 Bernard ; a woman killed by her own husband ; Morris the 
 rival Prophet, and Banks, and four women who belonged to 
 their party ; Isaac Potter, and Charles Wilson, and John 
 Walker. These are but a few. The death list is too long for 
 me to venture to give it. 
 
 One instance I can give from my own personal knowledge. 
 A sister who occasionally does a little work at my house on 
 one occasion said to me : " Mrs. Stenhouse, when first I came 
 to this country I lived in the southern portion of Utah. One 
 day I saw a woman running across the fields towards our 
 house, pale and trembling. When she came in she looked 
 round her as if she were frightened, and she asked if any one 
 besides our own family were present. _ On being assured that 
 there was no one present whom she might fear, she said : — 
 ' Two men came to our house late last night and asked to see 
 my husband, who had already retired. He was in bed, but 
 they insisted that he must get up as they had a message from 
 "the authorities" for him. When they saw him they re- 
 quested him to go with them to attend, they said, to some 
 Church business. I became very much alarmed, for my poor« 
 husband had been known to speak rather freely of late of 
 
320 "HAD THKIR BLOOD SHED — ALL FOR LOV-e!" 
 
 some of the measures of the Church, but he tried to reassure 
 me and finally left the house with the two men. In about 
 an hour after they eame back bearing between them his 
 lifeless body. They laid him upon the bed, and then one of 
 them pulled aside the curtain which constituted pur only 
 cupboard, and took therefrom a bake-kettle and stood it beside 
 the bed, in order to catch the blood that was flowing from a 
 fearful wound in his throat. They then left the house telliog 
 me to make as little noise about it as possible or they might 
 serve me in the same way. The men were masked,, and I 
 cannot tell who they are, but I spent a fearful night with my 
 poor dead husband.' " This sister added : " Sister Stenhouse, 
 in those more fearful times we dared not speak to each other 
 about such things for fear of spies." 
 
 These were a,ll well-known and notorious instances. I say 
 nothing of those of whose fate nothing — not even a whisper 
 — was ever heard ; and I say nothing of the frightful " cut- 
 tings off" before the Reformation and in recent years. 
 
 Gentile men and women were killed, for hatred ; and that 
 "killing" was no murder, for theirs was not innocent blood. 
 Apostates, and Saints of doubtful faith, and those who were 
 obnoxious, had their blood shed — all for love — and that " cut- 
 ting off" was also no murder, because to secure their salvation,, 
 by cutting their throats was an act of mercy. Can it be pos- 
 sible that men should thus act and say — and believe — that 
 Jesus, the gentle and merciful Saviour, commanded it when 
 He said : "Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself .' " 
 
 All through this Reign of Terror, marrying and giving in 
 marriage was the order of the day. It mattered not if a man 
 was seventy years of age, according to Brother Brigham he 
 was still a boy — "the brethren are all boys until they are 
 a hundred years old" — and some young girl of sixteen, fifteen, 
 or even younger would be "counselled" — that is, commanded 
 — to marry him. She might even have a sister no older than 
 herself, and then as likely as not he would take the two to. 
 wife, and very probably both on the same day. The girls 
 were told that to marry a young man was not a safe thing, for' 
 
AT WHAT AGE GIRLS SHOULD MARRY. 321 
 
 young men were not tried — it was better to marry a well- 
 tested patriarch and then their chances of " exaltation " in 
 the kingdom of heaven were sure and. certain. In this way 
 the life-long happiness of many a girl — little more than a 
 child — was blighted for ever. At the time of which I speak, 
 every unmarried woman, or girl who could by the utmost 
 stretch of possibility be thought old enough to marry, was 
 forced to find a husband, or a husband was immediately found 
 for her, and without any regard to her wishes was forced upon 
 her. Young men, and even boys, were forced, not only into 
 marriage, but even Tolygamy, and none dared resist. The 
 marrying mania, in fact, was universal and irresistible — every 
 one must marry or be given in marriage. So evidently was 
 this the case that women in jest said that, if one were to hang 
 a petticoat upon a fence-pole, half a dozen men would flock at 
 once to marry it ! Absurd as this may seem it was not very 
 far from the truth. Young men and maidens, old men 
 and children, widows, virgins, and youths — in fact every one 
 whether married or unmarried, it mattered not, was " coun- 
 selled " — commanded — to marry. 
 
 There is above fanaticism a stronger law which, despite 
 every effort of the deluded victim, will occasionally make itself 
 heard — the voice of Nature. Even during that strange time 
 in which every Saint seemed to have gone stark crazy mad, 
 the frightful anomaly of men of fifty, sixty, and even seventy 
 marrying mere children — girls of fourteen, and even thirteen, 
 —forced itself upon the attention of some of the leaders. 
 The question arose — an odd question to Gentile ears — " At 
 what age is a girl old enough to marry ? " Considerable dis- 
 cussion ensued, and even in the Tabernacle the subject was 
 taken up. The voice of authority, however, eventually 
 answered the matter, but not in the way that any ordinary 
 civilised person would expect. 
 
 In those times, unmarried girls were very scarce — in the 
 
 settlements it was difficult to find any at all. Not infrequently 
 
 it happened that a brother was "counselled" to marry, but 
 
 could not obey, as there was no unmarried woman in the place 
 
 20 
 
12Z SOME EXTRAORDINARY MARRIAGES^ 
 
 where h6 lived. In that case he generally paid a visit to 
 Salt Lake City. But business at the Endowment House 
 nevertheless was pretty lively ; in fact so much so that it was 
 deemed necessary to set apart certairi days for the various 
 Settlements. Once, when the " Prove day " was fast approach- 
 ing, two old brethren from that town who had been counselled 
 to enlarge their families, but who had been unsuccessful in 
 finding partners, began to despair of being able to obey " the 
 word of the Lord ! " The day before that appointed for the 
 Endowments and Celestial Marriage arrived, and they were as 
 far from success as ever. Being neighbors, the two old 
 gentlemen met and mingled their griefs, and considered what 
 might be done. It then occurred to them that there was a 
 certain brother who had two daughters, respectively twelve 
 zxidf out teen years of age, and they resolved to call upon him 
 about these children. As might be supposed, the father at 
 first refused them, giving as a reason that the girls were too 
 young. The old men explained that if they could not marry 
 the children it was impossible for them to "obey counsel," 
 and the father then agreed. The next morning the marriage 
 ceremony was performed in the Endowment House. One of 
 these wretches was sixty years of age, and the other a few 
 years younger. The father of the children was about forty, 
 I am really afraid that the reader will think that I exaggerate 
 or misrepresent facts. I wish it were so, for the case is so 
 outrageously atrocious ; but I am sorry to say that scores 
 and hundreds of instances similar to this, which occurred 
 during the Reformation, might be given. 
 
 Not long before this infamous transaction, one of these men 
 looking round in search of a wife, learned that a young Eng- 
 lish girl was stopping at the "house of a certain brother in the 
 neighborhood. He immediately visited that brother, and said 
 he should like to be made acquainted with the girl. It hap- 
 pened that , the young sister in question had recently been 
 married, but of that the ancient brother was of course ig- 
 norant, and his friend at whose house the . lady was stopping, 
 being fond of a little practical joke at times, did not inform 
 
A LOVERS DISAPPOINTMENT. 
 
 323 
 
 him of the fact. The would-be lover in a business-like way at 
 once began with his wooing ; spoke to the young lady about the 
 Revelation ; of the " counsel " he had received ; of his desire 
 to obey ; and finally offered her his hand and heart — at least as 
 much of the latter as remained. He expatiated upon his 
 prospects and possessions : — he had a small house and a large 
 lot, a good farm, a few cows, a yoke of oxen, and a wagon, 
 — another wife was a trifle which he felt himself well able to 
 keep. The sister listened in silence and seemed a little bash- 
 ful. At last she said that about such a serious matter she 
 must have a little ' time for consideration, and asked for a 
 week's thinking-time. 
 
 Delighted with his success the gentleman withdrew ; but 
 before the end of the week he found out that the lady was 
 married, he saw her husband, he saw the friend at whose 
 house the lady was stopping ; and over the matter he made a 
 considerable fuss. 
 
 There are before me as I write, letters, papers, documents 
 of various sorts relative to marriage and the matrimonial 
 affairs of the Saints, at the time of which I speak, that I wish 
 the reader could peep at. I would not like him to read them 
 — in fact, I dared not read them all myself, for some of them 
 are so shameful that the mere knowledge of having read them 
 through would make any right-minded person blush. Taking 
 more wives was the order of the day — how, was of little 
 matter. 
 
 The work of " Reformation " was in full progress ; the 
 people were excited to frenzy ; the Federal troops were ex- 
 pected ; men were marrying and maidens were given in mar- 
 riage ; every one in Utah was looking forward to the time 
 when the prophecies of Joseph, the Seer, should be fulfilled. 
 and the Son of Man should come :-^and then, when one would 
 have supposed that every man would have wished that his 
 hands should be pure, was perpetrated a deed which is unpar- 
 alleled in modern civilised times — a deed at which angels and 
 men have stood aghast with horror. 
 
CHAPTER XXIII. 
 
 THE MOUNTAIN MEADOWS' MASSACRE :— " I WILL REPAY, 
 SAITH THE LORD." 
 
 The Train from Arkansas — The Story of a Friend — How an Apostle Merited 
 Death — Mormon Hospitality? — How Justice Slumbered — That Sinner, 
 McLean — Weary and Footsore — What the Governor of the Territory Did 
 not Do — The Story of a Frightful Sin — A Weary Journey — " Without a 
 Morsel of Bread " — Christian-like Indians — Emptj' Wagons — Military Murder^ 
 ers — Corn, but no Mercy — A Regular Military Call — Pursuing the Pilgrims— 
 The Muster-Call— The Little Children Not to be Killed— The Infamous John 
 D. Lee— The Flag of Truce—" The State of Deseret "—A Deed of Fearful 
 Treachery — Surrounded by " Indians !" — The Emigrants Besieged — Dying for 
 Want of Water — Without Bread— The Mountain Meadows — Atrocious Mor- 
 mon Villainy— The White Flag— The " Indians " Again- The Mormon Story 
 of the Massacre — Treachery — The " White'" Indians — Mormon Perfidity — 
 ~ How the Emigrants Were Betrayed — Marching to Death — A Few Children 
 Saved— The Spoil— The Murder of Many Men— The End of a Terrible Story. 
 
 I FEEL myself utterly inadequate to tell the story of the 
 Mountain Meadows' Massacre— it is so shocking, so fiqnd- 
 like. And yet it must be told. 
 
 While the work of " Reformation " was going on, and when 
 the United States troops were constantly expected in the 
 Valley of the Great Salt Lake, a large train of emigrants passed ' 
 through Utah on its way to California. The train consisted 
 of one hundred and twenty or one hundred and thirty persons, 
 and they came chiefly from Arkansas. They were people 
 from the country districts, sober, hard-working, plain folks, but 
 well-to-do and, taken all in all, about as respectable a band of 
 emigrants as ever passed through Salt Lake City. 
 
THE MOUNTAIN MEADOWS MASSACRE. 325 
 
 Nothing worthy of any particular note occurred to them 
 until they reached the Valley — that was the point from which 
 they starte(^ towards death. 
 
 My old friend Eli B. Kelsey travelled with them from Fort 
 Bridger to Salt Lake City, and he spoke of them in the highest 
 terms. If I remember rightly he said that the train was 
 divided into two parts — the first a rough-and-ready set of men 
 —regular frontier pioneers ; the other a picked community, the 
 members of which were all more or less connected by family ties. 
 They travelled along in the most orderly fashion, without hurry 
 or confusion. On Sunday they rested, and one of their number 
 who had been a Methodist preacher conducted divine service. 
 All went well until they reached Salt Lake City, jvhere they 
 expected to be able to refit and replenish their stock of provi- 
 sions ; but it was there that they first discovered that feeling 
 of enmity which finally resulted in their destruction. 
 
 Now it so happened that the minds of the Saints in Salt 
 Lake City were at that time strongly prejudiced against the 
 people of Arkansas, and for a most unsaintly reason. The 
 Apostle Parley P. Pratt, who was one of the earliest converts 
 to Mormonism, and who so ably defended his adopted creed 
 with his pen and from the platform, had not very long before 
 been sojourning in Arkansas and had there run away with 
 another man's wife. This was only a trifle for an " Apostle " 
 to do, and the husband — Mr. McLean — might have known it. 
 But he was a most inconsiderate man and was actually 
 offended with the amorous Apostle for what he had done. He 
 pursued him and killed him, for in those rough parts it was 
 considered that the Apostle did wrong in marrying the man's 
 wife. Nobody, however, took any notice of the matter or 
 brought the murderer to trial. The Mormon people, of course, 
 took the side of the Apostle Parley P. Pratt. Sensitive them- 
 selves to the . highest degree concerning their wives and 
 daughters, they considered McLean a sinner for doing just 
 exactly what any Saint would have certainly done. Their 
 opinion, however, would have been a matter of consequence 
 only to themselves, had not such fatal consequences resulted 
 
326 THE ENEMY TO BE "CUT OFF." 
 
 from it. Reasoning without reason, they argued that McLean 
 was the enemy of every Mormon, and every Mormon was the 
 enemy of McLean ; — McLean was protected it Arkansas 
 therefore every man from Arkansas was an enemy of the Mor- 
 mons ; — an enemy ought to be cut off — therefore it was the 
 duty of every Mormon to "cut off" — if he could — every 
 Arkansas man. 
 
 This appears to have been the tone of thought which 
 actuated the minds of the leaders of the people at the time 
 when this emigrant train arrived in the City. 
 
 Weary and footsore they encamped by the Jordan Rivef, 
 trusting there to recruit themselves and their teams, and to 
 replenish their stock of provisions. The harvest in Utah that 
 year had been abundant, and there was nothing to hinder 
 them from obtaining a speedy and full supply. Brigham 
 Young was then Governor of Utah Territory, Commanderrin- 
 Chief of the Militia, and Indian Agent as well : — he was there- 
 fore responsible for all that took place within his jurisdiction. 
 It was his duty to protect all law-abiding persons who either 
 resided in or travelled through the country. The emigrants, 
 so far from beipg protected, were ordered to break Up their 
 camp and move on ; and it is said that written instructions 
 were sent on before them, directing the people in the settle- 
 ments through which they would have to pass to have no 
 dealings with them. This, considering their need of provi- 
 sions, was much the same as condemning them to certain 
 death. 
 
 Compelled to travel on, they pursued their journey slowly 
 towards Los Angeles. At American Fork they wished to 
 trade qff some of their worn-out stock and to purchase fresh, 
 — they also desired to obtain provisions. There was abund- 
 ance of everything from the farm and from the iield, for God 
 had very greatly blessed the land that year ; but they could 
 obtain nothing. They passed on, and went through Battle 
 Creek, Provo, Springville, Spanish Fork, Payson, Salt Creek 
 and Fillmore, and their reception was still the same, — ^^the 
 word of the Mormon Pontiff had gone forth, and no man 
 
THE EMIGRANTS ON THE ROAD. 327 
 
 dared to hold communion or to trade with them. Now and 
 then, some Mormon, weak in the faith or braver or more fond 
 of money than his fellows, would steal into the camp, in the 
 darkness of the night, bearing with him just what he was able 
 to carry ; but beyond this they could procure nothing. Their 
 only hope now lay in the chance of holding out until they 
 could push through to some Gentile settlement where the 
 word of the priestly Governor of Utah was not law. Through 
 fifteen different Mormon settlements did they pass, without 
 being able to purchase a morsel of bread, With empty 
 wagons and on short allowance, they pushed on until they 
 reached Corn Creek, where, for the first time in saintly Utah, 
 they met a friendly greeting from the Indians and purchased 
 from them thirty bushels of corn, of which they stood very 
 greatly in need. 
 
 At Beaver they were again repulsed, and at Parowan they 
 were not' permitted to enter the town — they were forced to 
 leave the public highway and pass round the west side of the 
 fort wall. They encamped by the stream, and tried, as before, 
 to obtain food and fresh cattle, but again to no purpose. 
 The reason why they were refused admission into the town 
 was probably because the militia was there assembled under 
 Colonel Wm. H. Dame — which militia afterwards assisted in 
 their destruction, for which preparations were even now 
 made. 
 
 They made their way to Cedar City, the most populous of 
 all the towns of Southern Utah. Here they were allowed to 
 purchase fifty bushels of tithing wheat and to have it ground 
 at the mill of that infamous scoundrel John D. Lee^ upon 
 whose memory will rest the eternal curses of all who have 
 ever heard his name. It was, however, no act of mercy — the 
 supplying of this corn. The sellers of . it knew well enough 
 even then that it would return to them again in the course of 
 a few days. After all, they had but forty days' rations to 
 carry them on to San Bernardino, in California — a journey of 
 about seventy days. Scanty kindness — miserable generosity ! 
 — fifty bushels of corn for a seventy-days' journey, for men. 
 
328 THE MILITIA ASSEMBLED. 
 
 women, and young children, and at least one little one to be 
 born on the road. 
 
 They remained in Cedar City only one day, and so jaded 
 were their teams that it took them three days to travel thence 
 to Iron Creek — a distance of twenty miles ; and two days 
 were occupied in journeying fifteen miles — the distance 
 betweei? Iron Creek and the Meadows. 
 
 The morning after they left Iron Creek, the Mormon 
 militia followed them in pursuit, intending, it is supposed, to 
 assault them at Clara Crossing. That this was no private 
 outburst, and that, on the contrary, it was done by authority, is 
 evident from sworn testimony to th6 effect that the assembling 
 of those troops was the result of "a regular military call 
 from the superior officers to the subordinate officers and privates 
 of the regiment. . . Said regiment was duly ordered to 
 muster, armed and equipped as the law directs, and prepared 
 for field operations." A regular military council was held at 
 Parowan, at which were present President Isaac C. Haight, 
 the Mormon High-Priest of Southern Utah, Colonel Dame, 
 Major John D. Lee, and the' Apostle George A. Smith. 
 
 No military council, whether of the militia or the ordinary 
 troops of the line, would dare to determine upon such an 
 important matter as the cutting off of an emigrant train of 
 one hundred and thirty persons without receiving permission 
 from superior authority. Brigham Young was in this case 
 the superior authority — he was the Commander-in-Chief of 
 the Militia : — the inference is obvious. I do not, of course, 
 say that he gave the order for this accursed deed, but that it 
 was his business to bring the criminals to justice no one can 
 doiibt or deny. 
 
 The regiment which started from Cedar City under the 
 command of Major John D. Lee, the sub-agent for Indian 
 affairs in Southern Utah, was accompanied by baggage- 
 ' wagons and the other paraphernalia of war, excepting only 
 heavy artillery, which in this case would have been useless. 
 But, at the same time, a large body of the Piede Indians had 
 been invited to accompany them. 
 
THE ORDER FOR THE MASSACRE. 329 
 
 An order came from head-quarters to cut off the entire 
 company except the little children. The emigrants were 
 utterly unprepared, and the first onslaught found them 
 defenceless. Accustomed, however, to border warfare, they 
 immediately corralled their wagons and prepared for a siege — 
 their great misfortune was that they had not any water. 
 
 Major John D. Lee, finding the emigrants resolute, sent to 
 Cedar City and Washington City for re-inforcements, which 
 duly arrived. 
 
 The next morning. Major John D. Lee assembled his 
 troops, including the auxiliaries which he had summoned, 
 about half a mile from the intrenchment of the fated emi- 
 grants, and then and there informed them, with all the cool- 
 ness which such an infamous scoundrel alone could muster, 
 that the whole company was to be killed, and only the little 
 children who were too young to remember anything were to 
 be spared. 
 
 The unfortunate emigrants did not know who their foes 
 were. They saw Indians, or men who were so colored that 
 they looked like Indians, and they saw others who were more 
 than strangers to them, but they had no clue to the cause of 
 their detention. To them all was mystery. That Indians 
 should attack them was quite within the bounds of probability, 
 although there was at that time no cause for such an outrage ; 
 but tha:t such an attack should be persistent, and should be 
 carried on under the peculiar circumstances in question, was, 
 to say the least, highly improbable. 
 
 A flag of truce was sent down to the unfortunate emi- 
 grants: but wherefore a flag of truce.' — wherefore any condi- 
 tions of warfare .' and wherefore should the militia regiment be 
 militant against them .' No answer can be returned to these 
 questions without disclosing secret scenes of sin and shameful 
 iniquity at the mention of which even the souls of fiend might 
 stand aghast. 
 
 A message was sent to the emigrant camp — a message not 
 of Christian love and help, but such as might be sent from 
 one ioeman to another. A flag of truce was sent, and with it 
 
330; THE FLAG OF TRUCE. 
 
 a message to the effect that, if the emigrants chose to lay down 
 their arms and .surrender themselves to the miUtia, their lives 
 should be spared. Consider the atrocity of this. Here was a 
 company of harmless emigrants, against whom not even the 
 slightest wrong-doing had been suggested. Yet, unquestioned, 
 unaccused, innocent of all wrong-doing, the authorised and 
 duly constituted militia of Utah Territory — a Territory claim- 
 ing even then to be admitted into the Union as the State of 
 "Deseret" — was encamped against those unoffending citizens, 
 with the cruel, the iniquitous purpose of cutting them off. 
 
 Who could rightly tell a story so fearful as this.' The 
 emigrant train; — men, women, and children fainting and fam- 
 ishing for want of bread and meat. In their pockets was 
 money wherewith the necessaries of life might have been 
 bought, and the generous hand of the Almighty had that year 
 been open so wide and had scattered those necessaries so lib- r 
 erally that nothing but the wickedness of man towards his 
 fellow could have created a dearth. But so it was that dark- 
 ness and the fear of death — a fearful death even at the door — r 
 was all those poor emigrants had standing before their eyes. 
 What right had the Mormon militia to be pursuing, to be 
 hanging about the skirts of any body of emigrants. Their 
 very presence was in itself unauthorised — criminal. The 
 emigrants supposed that they were surrounded by Indians and 
 expected the cruellest treatment in case of resistance — not 
 death, but the outrage and shocking atrocities of savages, 
 They did not know that the red men who threatened their 
 lives and the lives of their helpless wives and infants were 
 brought together at that spot for that same purpose by the 
 counsel of Mormon authorities. They did not know that so 
 many of the appearing red-skins were only painted devils, mocks 
 of humanity, wretches who under the mask of a red-skin's color 
 were eager to perpetrate the foulest of offences — scoundrels a 
 thousand times damned in the opinion of men and by the 
 decree of God. 
 
 Day after day went by, and the poor creatures began to 
 despair — who can wonder? The brave men cared little for 
 
FIEND-LIKE DEEDS OF THE MORMON MILITIA. 33 1 
 
 their own lives ; but there was something fearful in the thought 
 that their darling ones would be scalped, and torn in pieces, and 
 brutally outraged ! Who can wonder that they resolved to sell 
 life as dearly as they possibly could ? They might at least die in 
 defence of those they loved. 
 
 Sp day followed day. The agony of the unhappy men and 
 women who were thus besieged and were in daily, hourly peril 
 of the most frightful of all deaths can be imagined — not told. 
 Meanwhile, what were those atrocious scoundrels doing who 
 were lying in waij for their blood.' Some of them were 
 tricked out as Indians ; some were in their own proper dresses ; 
 and, moreover, real Utes were there. The unhappy victims 
 qould not possibly escape — there was time for the murderers 
 to do their work leisurely. Between chance shots, which were 
 intended to, and did, carry death with them, they amused them- 
 selves with "pitching horse-shoe quoits:" — such heartlessness 
 is almost beyond conception. 
 
 In terrible need of water, they thought that even the Indians 
 who they supposed were their assailants might possibly respect 
 a token of truce ; so they dressed two little girls in white and 
 sent them down to the well. But the fiends — the Mormon 
 militia — shot them down. In the day of doom, the blood of 
 those" babes will testify more heavily against Major John D. 
 Lee and Isaac C. Haight, and Colonel Dame, and George A. 
 Smith, and the other wretch who plotted and contrived that 
 fearful iniquity, than any of the base and cowardly crimes 
 which have for years and years blackened 'their contemptible 
 and miserable souls. 
 
 They could not possibly advance. Their corn would not 
 last long. They were famishing for water. How long they 
 could hold out was evidently only a matter of time. Had the 
 train consisted only of men, they might certainly, if with loss, 
 have cut their way through their besiegers and escaped ; but 
 with wives and children, and others bound to them by the ten- 
 derest ties, such a thing was impossible. They looked and 
 waited. Savage Indians they supposed were their only ene- 
 mies. Coldly, strangely as they had been treated at the 
 
332 THE " WHITE INDIANS '' :— TREACHEKy*,, 
 
 Mormon settlements, they never for a moment supposed that 
 white men could be in league against them or could meditate 
 their destruction. 
 
 Up in the meadows — in the distance — there was a white 
 dusty cloud as if of some person or persons approaching: — 
 the hearts of the emigrants leaped for joy. Was help coming 
 at last? It was evident that a wagon was coming near, and the 
 wagon was filled with armed men ; — here was hope. After all 
 the misery of that waitful watching, they were overjoyed, and 
 shouted aloud with gladness, and sprang with open arms to 
 welcome their visitors. Little did they suppose that the fiends 
 who then came down, with pale faces and the manners of 
 white men, were the same as those who, painted and decked 
 out like Indians, had been leaguered about their camp with 
 murderous intentions for so many days. 
 
 The wagon came near, and was found to be filled with armed 
 men. Surely now, the unhapj^ emigrants thought, sub- 
 stantial help had come — the authorities of Utah in the 
 neighborhood, whether Gentile 'or Mormon, had come out in 
 the cause of civilisation and humanity, and succor was at hand. 
 
 A white flag was waved from the wagon as an emblem of 
 peace, and in order that the emigrants might know that it was 
 white men and not the red demons of the hills who approached. 
 They did not, indeed, know that these themselves were the 
 monsters who had wronged them all this time and who were 
 even now compassing their death. 
 
 Inside that wagon was President Haight, the infamous 
 Mormon Bishop John D. Lee, and other authorities of the 
 Church in Southern Utah. They professed to the emigrants 
 that they came upon the, friendly errand of standing between 
 them and the Indians. They said that the Indians had taken 
 offence at something that the emigrants had done, that they 
 were thirsting for their blood, but that they— the Mormon offi- 
 cials — were on good terms with them and had influence, 
 and would use their good offices in the cause of mercy 
 and of peace. After some discussion they left with the pro- 
 fessed view of conciliating the Indians. Then they returned 
 
THE MASSACRE. 333 
 
 and said that the Indians had agreed, that if the emigrants 
 marched back to Salt Lake City their lives should be spared ; 
 but that they must leave everything behind them in their 
 camp, even including the common weapons of defence which 
 every Western man carries about his person. The Mormon 
 officials then solemnly undertook to bring .an armed force and 
 to guard the emigrants safely back again to the Settlements. 
 
 The emigrants were not cowards, and would doubtless have 
 preferred to cut their way through to the South, but they could 
 not leave their wive^ and little ones, and any terms, however 
 disadvantageous, were better than leaving those they loved to 
 the tender mercy of those wretches. 
 
 This agreement being made, the Mormon oilficials retired, 
 and after a short time again returned with thirty or forty 
 armed men. Then the emigrants were marched out — the 
 women and children in the front, and the men following, while 
 the Mormon guard followed in the rear. When they had 
 marched in this way about a mile and had arrived at the place 
 where the Indians were hid in the bushes on each side of the 
 road, the signal was given for the slaughter. Sq taken by sur- 
 prise were the emigrants, and so implicitly had they confided 
 in these murderers that they offered no resistance. The Mor- 
 mon Militia — their guard — immediately opened fire upon them 
 from the rear, while the Indians, and Mormons disguised as 
 Indians, who were hidden among the bushes, rushed out upon 
 them, shooting them down with guns and bows and arrows, 
 and cutting some of the men's throats with knives. The 
 women and children, shrieking with mortal terror, scattered and 
 fled, some trying to hide in the bushes. T\ko young girls 
 actually did escape for about a quarter of a mile when they 
 were overtaken and butchered under circumstances of the 
 greatest brutaUty. The son of John D. Lee endeavored to 
 protect one poor girl who clung to him for help ; but his 
 father, tearing her from him by violence, blew out her brains. 
 Another unhappy girl is said to have kneeled to this same 
 monster Lee, entreating him to spare her life. He dragged 
 her into the bushes, stripped her naked, and cut her throat 
 
334 "I WILL REPAY) SAITH THE LORD." 
 
 from ear to ear, after she had suffered worse at his hands than 
 death itself. About half an hour was probably occupied in 
 the butchery, and every soul of that company was cut off, 
 excepting oi;ily a few little children who were suppv^sed to be 
 too young to understand or remember what had taken place. 
 The unfortunate victims were then stripped, without reference 
 to age or sex, and then left to rot upon the field. There they 
 remained until torn and di,smembered by the wolves, when it 
 was then thought prudent to conceal such as lay nearest to 
 the road. An eye-witness^ subsequently visiting the spot 
 said : — 
 
 The scene of the massacre, even at this late day, was horrible to look upon. 
 Women's hair in detached locks and in masses hung to the sage bushes and 
 was strewn over the ground in many places. Parts of little children's dresses, 
 and of female costume dangled from the shrubbery, or lay scattered about, and 
 among these, here and there on every hand, for at least a mile in the direction 
 of the road, by two miles east and west, there gleamed, bleached white by the 
 weather, the skulls and other bones of those who had suffered. A glance into 
 the wagon, when all these had been collected, revealed a sight which never can 
 be forgotten. 
 
 The remains were subsequently gathered together by Major 
 Carleton, the United States Commissioner, who erected over 
 them a large cairn of stones, surmounted by a cross of red 
 cedar, with an inscription thereon : " Vengeance is mine : 1 
 will repay, saith the Lord;" and on a stone beneath were 
 engraved the words :- 
 
 "Here 120 men, v/omen, and children were massacred in 
 cold blood, early in September, 1857. They were frpin- 
 Arkansas." 
 
 "It is said that this monument was subsequently destroyed 
 by order of Brigham Young, when he visited that part of the 
 Territory. 
 
 The little children, while their parents were being butchered, 
 had clung about their murderer's knees entreating mercy, but 
 none of them finding it save those who were little more than 
 infants. Their fears and cries the night after the murder are 
 said to have been heart-rending. One little babe, just begin- 
 ning to walk, was shot through the arm. Another little girl 
 
THE SPOIL OF THE MURDERED EMIGRANTS. $37 
 
 was shot through the ear, and the clothes of most of them were 
 
 saturated with their mothers' blood. They were distributed 
 
 among the people of the settlements, and when finally the 
 
 Government took them under the protection of the nation, 
 
 the people among whom these little ones lived actually charged 
 
 for their boarding. Two of them are said to have uttered 
 
 some words from which it was presumed that their intelligence 
 
 was in advance of their years. They were taken out quietly 
 
 and — buried! This happened some time after the massacre. 
 
 Most of the property of the emigrants was sold by public 
 
 auction in Cedar Cit^ : — the Indians got most of the flour and 
 
 ammunition, and the Mormons the more valuable articles. 
 
 They jested over it and called it " Spoil taken at the siege of 
 
 Sevastopol." There is legal proof that the clothing stripped 
 
 frorri the corpses, blood-stained, riddled by the bullets, and 
 
 with shreds of flesh attached to it, was placed in the cellar of 
 
 the tithing office, where it lay about three weeks, when it was 
 
 privately sold. The cellar is said to have smelt of it for years. 
 
 Long after this time, jewelry torn from the mangled bodies 
 
 of the unfortunate women was publicly worn in Salt Lake City, 
 
 and every one knew whence it came. A tithing of it all is 
 
 reported upon very conclusive evidence to have been laid at 
 
 the feet of Brigham Young. 
 
 This is the story — most imperfectly told — for I dare not 
 sketch its foulest details, — of the Mountain Meadows Mas- 
 sacre. Brigham Young, who was at the time Governor of 
 the Territory and also Indian Agent, made no report of 
 the matter. Let that fact of itself speak for his innocence or 
 guilt. Would any other governor or agent in another Ter- 
 ritory have been thus silent } John D. Lee, and Dame, and 
 Haight, and the other wretches have never been brought to 
 trial or cut off from the Church, although their monstrous 
 crime has never been a secret, nor have any endeavors been 
 made to conceal it. 
 
 . This fearful deed was one of the unavoidable results of the 
 teachings of the Mormon leaders during the Reformation. 
 There were crimes then perpetrated in secret which will never 
 
J38 THE MURDER OF DOCTOR ROBINSON. 
 
 be known until the Day of Doom ; and there were horrors 
 which have been known and recorded, but for which no one 
 has been brought to trial or has suffered inconvenience. 
 There are men in Salt Lake City, who walk about unblush- 
 ingly in broad daylight, but who are known to be murderers, 
 and whose hands have been again and again dyed with blood 
 under circumstances of the most atrocious cruelty. 
 
 There was one cruel murder — but by no means the worst — 
 which came under my own personal observation, and which I 
 have alluded to elsewhere — the murder of Dr. John King Rob- 
 inson in Salt Lake City — which attracted more than ordinary 
 attention. This gentleman was a physician of good standings 
 who came out as assistant-surgeon with the United States army, 
 and afterwards began to practice in Salt Lake City. He was 
 known as a man of unimpeachable moral character, and there 
 are to this day hundreds of responsible people who would 
 testify to his fair fame and rectitude ; although he had by some 
 means incurred the dislike of many of the Mormon leaders. 
 He formed the idea of taking possession of some warm springs 
 on the north of the city, and proposed to erect there baths, an 
 hospital, etc. A small wooden shanty was erected for the 
 purpose of holding possession, but the city authorities claimed 
 the spring, and, after some very unpleasant proceedings, the 
 matter was referred to the law courts, and Judge Titus decided 
 against the doctor. 
 
 After this verdict had been rendered, Dr. Robinson seems 
 to have acted very prudently, and to have remained in-doors 
 as much as possible during the succeeding days. Between 
 eleven and twelve o'clock on the night of the third day, how- 
 ever, after the family had retired to rest, a man called at the 
 house, and stating that his brother had broken his leg by a 
 fall from a mule and was suffering very much, he, after some 
 earnest persuasion, induced the doctor to accompaiiy him. 
 Anxious as he might be to remain in-doors at such a time, no 
 professional man would refuse to perform an act of mercy. 
 He accordmgly went. At a distance of about a couple of 
 hundred steps from the house he was struck over the head 
 
"WHEX 'DESERET' becomes A STATE?" 339 
 
 with some sharp instrument, and immediately after shot 
 through the brain. His wife, a young girl, to whom he had 
 only been married a very short time, heard the report of the 
 pistol, and witnesses saw men fleeing from the spot. The 
 police were sent for, and the body was carried to Independence 
 Hall, and afterwards to the victim's house. The Mayor of 
 the city was not informed of the murder until ten o'clock the 
 next day, and the chief-of-police who was sitting round the 
 fire with his men when news of the murder arrived, went to 
 bed immediately and did not visit the scene qf the outrage for 
 three days. * 
 
 The following Sunday, Brigham Young, in the Tabernacle, 
 publicly suggested that the doctor had probably been mur- 
 dered by some of the, soldiers from Camp Douglas, who were 
 dissatisfied with his treatment when they were under his hands, 
 or else that he had fallen in some gambling transaction — both 
 of which statements, however, were known by every one pres- 
 ent to be utterly false. No one was ever punished for this cruel 
 murder. This murder did not occur during the Reformation, 
 but it was the natural result of the teachings of those times. 
 
 I simply mention these facts without any comment of my 
 own. Let the reader form his own conclusion. More of these 
 frightful stories I do not care to relate ; and I should not even 
 have presented these to the notice of the reader had it not 
 been impossible otherwise to give any suitable idea of that 
 terrible "Reformation." The Gentile army came in. The 
 Union Pacific Railroad was opened. Changes and chances 
 altered all that had been, and brought into being that which 
 might be, and that which finally really was. Instead of look- 
 ing to the events of three or four thousand years ago, men 
 began to act up to things which were — to think and act in the 
 present, not to dream of the past. The day has gone by — but 
 not far — when the perpetration openly of such deeds was pos- 
 sible; but it is still boasted that when " Deseret" becomes a 
 State the " Saints" will " shew still greater Zeal for tJte Lord!" 
 
 21 
 
CHAPTER XXIV. 
 
 WAYS AND WORKS OF THE SAINTS :— THE PROPHET'S MIL- 
 LINERY BILL. 
 
 Life in Zion — Introduced to Brother Heber — "Have you got the Blues J" — A 
 wife's trials : Counselled to take AnotWr Wife — The Tabernacle Sermons — 
 The Crowning Glory of a Man— Spiritual Food—" Filled with the Devil "— 
 Face to Face with Polygamy — Winter in Salt Lake City — A New Position — I 
 Produce My Treasures — My "Talkative Friend" — Comforting Visitors — "I 
 don't like Crying Women — Afraid of Opposition — Paid in Salt Chips and 
 Whetstones — Creating a Business — " Something Like Home " — A Bonnet for- 
 Brigham's Favorite Wife — Running up a Little Bill — How the Honest Prophet 
 Paid It — Has He any Conscience? — My Whole Fortune Gone. 
 
 WHEN I arrived in Utah I found that nearly all the Elders 
 with whom I had formerly been acquainted had more 
 than one wife there. Many of these brethren called to see me, 
 and kindly insisted that I should visit their families ; but this 1 
 felt was almost an impossibility. 
 
 My whole nature rebelled at the thought of visiting where 
 there were several wives ; for, in defiance of all the teaching 
 that I had listened to and the tyranny to which we had sub- 
 mitted, human nature would assert itself, and my womanly in- 
 stincts revolted against the system. I could not endure the 
 thought of visiting those families in company with my husband. 
 I thought that perhaps sometimes I might venture alone; but, 
 Oh, not with him, — no, not with him. It was bad enough and 
 humiliating enough for me to witness by myself the degrada- 
 tion of my sex; but to do so in the presence of my husband 
 was more than I could calmly contemplate. I knew that I 
 
"HAVE YOU GOT THE BLUES?" 341 
 
 should not be able to control myself, and might probably say 
 some very unpleasant things, which I should afterwards regret ; 
 for I so thoroughly loathed even the idea of Polygomy at that 
 time that I was filled with a desire to let every one know and 
 understand just what my feelings were on that subject. 
 
 I had left New York against my will, although I had not 
 openly rebelled. I had never reproached my husband about 
 it, for I felt that his lot was irrevocably cast with the Mormons: 
 I knew that when I married him, and it was of no use now for 
 me to repine. I must go on to the end — there was no help for 
 me. The journey across the Plains, and all the discoveries 
 which I had made, had not tended' to soothe my rebellious 
 heart, and I am not quite sure that I did not sow by the way 
 a little discontent among the sisters. The idea, however, that 
 such was the case did not, I must admit, fill me with much 
 repentance. To my husband I had said very little, but I 
 think he would bear me witness that what I did say was said 
 effectively. Now when I was brought face to face with practical 
 Polygamy and could observe it in its most repulsive phases, I 
 hated it more than ever. 
 
 One day, not long after our arrival, as we were taking a walk 
 together, I saw across the road a man gesticulating after an 
 eccentric fashion and beckoning to us. Mr. Stenhouse said : 
 "that is Brother Heber C. Kimball;" and I looked agam with 
 interest; to see what that celebrated Apostle was like. I had 
 both heard and read a great deal about Brother Heber, and 
 what I had learned was not at all of a character to impress 
 me favorably — he had been so severe in his denunciation of 
 every woman who dared to oppose Polygamy. On the present 
 occasion his conduct was, I thought, anything but gentlemanly ; 
 and when we crossed .the road to him, — which on account of 
 his position in the Church — next to Brigham himself — we, of 
 course, were compelled to do, — my face must have betrayed 
 my feelings I am sure, for almost his first words after shaking 
 hands were : " Have you got the blues ? " 
 
 My answer was ready in a moment — " I have had nothing 
 else ever since I came here." 
 
342 "I RATHER LIKE YOUR LOOKS. 
 
 " Well," he replied, " It is time that you should get rid of 
 them, and I am going to talk to you some day soon, for I rather 
 like your looks." 
 
 I did not like his looks much, however, nor was I at all 
 pleased with his manner. I do not say that I was altogether 
 without blame in feeling thus, for I was prejudiced. Of course 
 I was prejudiced. From the first moment when I heard that 
 Polygamy was a doctrine of the Church, I was predisposed to 
 be dissatisfied with everything : — I was henceforth not myself, 
 for the terrible apprehension of my own fate in the " Celestial 
 Order" had changed my whole nature, and that change of 
 itself was a great source of grief to me. I keenly realised 
 that I was no longer the light-hearted pleasant companion to 
 my husband that I had been, and many a time and oft I wished 
 for his sake that I could die, for I felt that I never could be 
 happy in Mormonism again. 
 
 How many times have I knelt by my husband's couch when 
 he was unconscious of it, and have wept bitter tears of sorrow, 
 earnestly praying to the Lord to subdue my rebellious heart, 
 and, if it were necessary, rather than I should be a continual 
 annoyance to my husband whom I loved with all my soul, that 
 every particle of love in my heart should be withered, so that 
 I might perchance, if without love, be able at least to do my 
 duty. I fully realised that in Polygamy there could be no real 
 love ; and while my affections were still ' placed upon my hus- 
 band, it was torture to live in a community where I was 
 compelled to listen to the "counsels" which were given to 
 him, day after day, regardless of my presence, to take another 
 wife. I was too proud to notice any ordinary allusion that 
 was made to the subject before me; but when the conversation 
 was turned in that direction by those who professed to be sin- 
 cere friends and to entertain a kindly interest in my welfare, I 
 was compelled to listen and reply. 
 
 In my unhappy condition, I thought that perhaps I might 
 derive some consolation from the sermons in the Tabernacle — 
 something that might shed a softer light upon my rugged 
 pathway. But instead of obtaining consolation, I heard that 
 
THE CROWNING GLORY OF CREATION! 343 
 
 which aroused every feeling of my soul to rebellion and 
 kindled again within me the indiignation which I had been so 
 long struggling to conquer. I heard that woman was an infe- 
 rior being, designed by the Lord for the especial glory and 
 exaltation of man, that she was a creature that should feel 
 herself honored if he would only make her the mother of his 
 children — a creature who if very obedient and faithful through 
 all the trials and tribulations in life, might some day be 
 rewarded by becoming one of her husband's queens, but 
 should even then shine only by virtue of the reflected light 
 derived from the glory of her spouse and lord. He was to be 
 her " saviour," for he was all in all to her ; and it was through 
 him alone and at his will that she could obtain salvation. We 
 were informed that man was the crowning glory of creation, 
 for whom all things — woman included — were brought into 
 being; and that the chief object of woman's existence was to 
 help man to his great destiny. 
 
 Not a sentence ; indeed, not a word did we ever hear as to 
 the possibility of womanly perfection and exaltation in her 
 own right ; and not only so, but, as if this were not enough to 
 .crush all ambition out of our souls, we were instructed in some 
 new views of marriage. The great object of marriage, we 
 were told, was the increase of children. Those diviner objects 
 — the companionship of soul ; the devotion of a refined and 
 pure affection ; the indissoluble union of two existences — 
 were never presented to the yearning hearts of those poor 
 women who listened to the miserable harangues of the Tab- 
 ernacle : such aspirations had nothing to do with the hard, 
 cruel facts of their life in Polygamy. 
 
 And this I found was how the women of Utah were spirit- 
 ually sustained. Seldom, indeed, was taught anything better, 
 but frequently much that was worse. If Nature, asserting its 
 right to a full return of love, should manifest itself and inspire 
 some of these poor wives to rebel against the lives which they 
 were compelled to lead in Polygamy, then it would be said, in 
 the language of the Tabernacle, that the women were "filled 
 with the devil," and that unless they repented speedily, they 
 
344 WHAT THEY TAUGHT IX THE TABERNACLE. 
 
 would "apostatise and go to hell;" — an assurance which was 
 scarcely necessary, for many of those poor souls were endur- 
 ing as much as if they were there already. Or if some woman 
 was found objecting to Polygamy on account of its crushing 
 and degrading effects upon women generally, then, as I just 
 said, she was told in the coarse language of Brigham Young 
 himself that "such women had no business to complain; it 
 was quite enough honor for them to be permitted to bear 
 children to God's holy Priesthood." 
 
 I found, therefore, that the sermons in the Tabernacle were 
 not calculated to help me much spiritually. I had neither 
 friend nor counsellor on earth to whom I could turn for help — 
 my God alone remained to me. But, ah, how different were 
 my ideas of God then, from those which I entertained before 
 and since. Once I could look upon the beauties of nature 
 and the varied experiences of human life, and while my soul 
 was lifted up with devotion and gratitude, I could see the lov- 
 ing hand of my Heavenly Father in everything around me, 
 Now there was neither light nor beauty before my eyes — all 
 was dark and dreary; there was nothing to draw away my 
 heart from such sad thoughts as these. It was painfully clear 
 to my understanding, then as now, that in Mormonism woman 
 was to lose her personal identity. All that Christianity had 
 done to elevate her was to be ruthlessly set aside and trampled 
 under foot, and she was instantly to return to the position 
 which she occupied in the darkest ages of the world's 
 existence. 
 
 I had at that time the daily and hourly cares of a family 
 devolving upon me, and had not therefore much leisure tp 
 spend in visiting my friends even if I had desired to do so. 
 Notwithstanding that, however, I had abundant opportunities 
 of observation; and thus my experience of Mormonism and 
 Polygamy in Utah is much the same as that of any Mormon 
 woman of ordinary sense ; I only tell what others could relate if 
 they had the inclination to do so. It was not possible for me to 
 live in Salt Lake City without being brought face to face with 
 Polygamy in some shape or other every day of my life. Had 
 
PREPARING TO START AFRESH. 345 
 
 it been otherwise, and if remaining at home would have kept 
 it from my view, I probably never should have had the cour- 
 age to enter a house where it was practiced. To those who 
 know nothing of that degrading system this may seem rather 
 an exaggeration of feeling; and yet, even at that early day, I 
 had seen so much of the folly and weakness of the Mormon 
 brethren, both in London and New York, before we went to 
 Utah, and had witnessed so many evil results of their teach- 
 ings, that it was with the greatest difficulty that I could con- 
 trol my feelings stffficiently to call upon any family where 
 there was more than one wife. And yet what I knew then 
 was nothing in comparison to what I afterwards witnessed — 
 yes, that I myself endured. 
 
 During the winter, although I visited very little, I attended 
 a good many parties at the Social Hall ; but I did so more 
 from a wish to be agreeable to my husband than from any 
 pleasure that they afforded me, for life had lost its charm to 
 me, and I was not happy. How many times have I gazed 
 wistfully at those lofty mountains which surrounded the city, 
 and felt that they were indeed my prison walls. How bitterly 
 have I realised that I should never be able to go beyond them. 
 But in a new country, with a family to provide for, a mother 
 has not much time to waste in pining, even if it be for liberty 
 itself, and I would willingly draw the veil over that portion of 
 my life. 
 
 As my husband had been on mission for so many years and 
 had spent all his time in the service of the Church, with the 
 exception of a few brief months before we left New York — 
 when he was engaged on the staff of the New York Herald — 
 I naturally enough thought that when we reached Zion his 
 occupation would be gone. There would be no need of 
 preaching to the Saints : on the contrary they would be able 
 to teach us ; and we should have to find out what we could do 
 in this new country to support ourselves and our children. In 
 this I was not mistaken. 
 
 Now among the "absolutely necessary" things which I had 
 brought with me from New York, were about three hundred 
 
34§ "that looked a little suspicious. 
 
 dollars' worth of millinery goods, which I had secreted among 
 our other properties, thinking that they would very probably 
 come in useful to the fair daughters of Zion — notwithstand- 
 ing that the Elders had told me of fiery sermons delivered by 
 the Prophet himself condemning all feminine display, and that 
 the sisters would scorn to wear Gentile fashions. I knew my 
 own sex too well to believe that all this was strictly true, and 
 I felt certain that I should find, even among the Saints, some 
 weak sisters who would appreciate my thoughtfulness in 
 bringing such articles for their use. I had also noticed that 
 the American Elders themselves would frequently enquire 
 where they could buy the best gloves and the prettiest ribbons 
 and laces, and that looked a little suspicious. 
 
 Quite a number of such articles, therefore, found their way 
 into my list of "absolute necessaries," and I know that my 
 husband was secretly quite at a loss to know what had become 
 of a certain sum of money which he was aware I had ob- 
 tained from the sale of some of our things in New York. 
 But my foresight in this instance was very useful to us when 
 we arrived in Zion. 
 
 One day when Mr. Stenhouse was absent seeking employ- 
 ment, I thought I would make a display of my treasures and 
 surprise him on his return. Accordingly, with the assist- 
 ance of our faithful domestic, whom I had brought with me 
 across the Plains, and who had also lived with me in Switzerr 
 land, we contrived to place two or three planks in such a way 
 as to make a rough table on which to display the goods. I 
 had been secretly at work for about two weeks, trimming the 
 bonnets and hats, and making a number of head-dresses, such 
 as were worn in New York when we ■ left ; and, although 
 we had been three months on the Plains, and quite a month 
 in Utah, yet those bonnets and head-dresses were of the very 
 latest style to the ladies of Salt Lake City. 
 
 My Swiss girl was quite a carpenter, and when my tempo- 
 rary table was arranged, I placed a pretty-looking cloth over 
 it to hide its defects, and then began to arrange the various 
 articles. I found that I had a much finer assortment than I 
 
I INTRODUCE MY "TALKATIVE FRIEND." 347 
 
 had imagined, for I had bought them at different times, and 
 had packed them away hurriedly, lest Mr. Stenhouse or some 
 of the other Elders — ^for there were generally one or two in 
 the house — should object to my taking them. When my 
 table was filled, and I found that I had still more to display, I 
 was very much pleased, for I saw in my hats and bonnets, 
 flour, meat, and potatoes for my children, and I felt hopeful, 
 for one of the sisteis had assured me that I should be certain 
 to sell them. The next thing to do was to advertise my stock. 
 After some reflectien, I remembered another of the sisters, 
 who was quite a good talker, and who felt very kindly towards 
 me. I had known her in England — she had been in Vtah 
 about three years, and her husband had by that time been 
 blessed with two other wives. She used to say that she had 
 no patience with a set of grumbling women who did not know 
 what was good for them. I do not think that the blessed- 
 ness enjoyed by her husband was shared by the two wives, 
 for more forlorn-looking women I never saw. My husband, 
 however, told me that this was none of my business, and I 
 believed him, of course, after the fashion of all good wives. 
 
 But to return. This good sister, besides being an excellent 
 talker, had really nothing else to do besides visiting her neigh- 
 bors, for the other wives now took entire charge of all the 
 household duties. So I made her a present of a new bonnet, 
 as I knew that then in two days my goods would be quite 
 sufficiently advertised ; and in this I was not mistaken. 
 
 Almost the first visitors who called to ^ee me were a lady 
 and her daughter. I talked freely to her and answered her 
 enquiries, and she told me that she herself had had some 
 experience in the business. " In Salt Lake City," she said, 
 " I think you will not be able to sell those goods ; they are too 
 fashionable for the people here, and there is no encouragement 
 given to any one in this business. I am afraid you will be 
 disappointed." 
 
 I believed every word she said, and felt all my airy, hopeful 
 castles begin to crumble away. Before she left, however, she 
 very kindly offered to purchase all my good? at a low figure 
 
348 "I don't like crying women." 
 
 and thus relieve me of the anxiety and trouble of selling them. 
 But I had had a little experience in the world, — although prob- 
 ably I appeared to her somewhat innocent, — and I thought 
 that if she could sell them, there was a chance at least that I 
 also might be able to do so. At-any-rate, I resolved to try, 
 and I told her so when she left me with many kind wishes for 
 my success. But what she had said during her visit- had 
 chilled my enthusiasm, and I pictured all my pretty newly- 
 made articles becoming soiled and faded, with no one to buy 
 them ; while the little ones, barefooted — like so many children 
 in Utah then — were running about crying for bread which I 
 cou4d not buy them. I felt bad, and — if I must confess it — I 
 sat down and had a good cry. 
 
 Just at that moment I heard a knock at the door, and 
 hastily drying my eyes, I opened it, and there stood my talk- 
 ative friend. 
 
 "Stop crying'!" she exclaimed, "What is the matter, my 
 dear .' Oh do stop crying. I don't like crying women : we 
 see so many of them among the Saints of God that it is really 
 ■a shame and a disgrace. Tell me what is the matter ? 
 Has your husband got another wife, or are you afraid that 
 he won't be able to get one ? Come, tell me !" 
 
 All this was uttered in a breath, and without the possibility 
 of my putting in a word by way of reply or remonstrance. At 
 last I told her that I had just had a visit from 'one of the 
 sisters and her daughter, whom I described. 
 
 " I know," she said, " I met her as I was coming here. Do 
 you know who she is T 
 
 " No," I replied, " I do not think she told me her name ; she 
 •simply came to look at the goods;" 
 
 "And did she tell you that they would sell well, and 
 that they are the best investment that you could have 
 ■made ?" 
 
 " Quite the contrary," I said, " She discouraged me so much 
 that I could not help shedding tears." 
 
 "Well now," she answered, "that was Mrs. C , one 
 
 of our milliners here ; and you suppose she was going to en- 
 
PAID IN SALT-CHIPS AND WHETSTONES.' 34g 
 
 courage you to set up an opposition shop, do you? If you do, 
 why, you've got something yet to ,learn." Indeed I felt that I 
 had got a great deal to learn. 
 
 " Now / have come to tell you quite a different story," she 
 said, "This very afternoon you will have at least a dozen ladies 
 here ; and ladies, too, who have got the money to pay for what 
 they have, and who won't pay you in salt chips and whet- 
 stones." 
 
 " Do they ever pay in such things .'" I enquired. 
 
 "Why certainly ttey do. That is the kind of pay that the 
 good Saints generally expect their poor brethren and sisters 
 to be satisfied with, and to feed their hungry children upon. 
 But I say that this is wrong. Not that I want to set myself 
 :up as a judge in Zion, or that I should criticise the actions of 
 the brethren^God forbid ! But when I see the rich brethren 
 grinding the faces of the poor in that way, why, I say that it is 
 wrong. But you must not take any such pay as that. You 
 may not always get money, but you can at least get flour, 
 potatoes, and molasses. Now, I tell you that you are going to 
 sell every article that you have got, and I shall take pleasure 
 in recommending you and talking about it. Why, I've been to 
 about two score .people already ;— but, there ! I see your hus- 
 band coming, and I must go !" My husband, indeed, was 
 .there. He was not very fond of my talkative friend, and 
 ipassed her by with a polite salutation only ; but when he saw 
 what I had been doing the light dawned upon his mind — he 
 no longer wondered what had become of the dollars in New 
 York, and — astonished at my success'— he congratulated me 
 upon the good use to which I had put them. 
 
 After this interview I felt quite encouraged, and I very soon 
 found that my friend's predictions were correct. I had no 
 difficulty in selling, and I created quite a little business, 
 although we lived a considerable distance from Main Street. 
 And what with my efforts, and some employment which 
 my husband obtained, we contrived to get through our first, 
 winter in Salt Lake City. 
 
 But I anticipate. 
 
3SO THE MILLINERY BILL OF BRIGHAM S WIVES. 
 
 One day my husband informed me that there was a house 
 about to be vacated shortly, and that Brigham Young had told 
 him we had better take it. It was pleasantly situated near 
 the Tabernacle, and, as houses then were, it was quite a desir- 
 able residence. We had it thoroughly cleaned, and then 
 moved in. When I arrived in the evening I found that Mr. 
 Stenhouse, with the assistance of our faithful Swiss girl, had 
 arranged everything as the goods arrived from the other 
 house ;, and the place looked so clean, and there was such a 
 bright fire burning that I felt that we now had really some- 
 thing like a home, and my heart was filled with gratitude. 
 
 Soon after our establishment in our new home, Brigham 
 sent for me and asked me to make a handsome bonnet for his 
 then favorite wife Emmeline. He left it entirely to my taste ; 
 I was to make just what I pleased, so that it suited her and 
 gave satisfaction. 
 
 I made my bonnet ; and when I presented it, Brigham 
 Young was so pleased that he immediately gave me an order 
 to make one for each of his wives. I was very much pleased at 
 this, for we needed furniture and many other necessaries very 
 badly, and I thought that this would enable me to get them. I 
 expected, of course, that my account would be paid in money, 
 for I did not suppose that the Prophet of the Lord would 
 offer me chips or whetstones : — he could afford to pay cash, 
 and, of course, would do so. He had furnished me with some 
 material out of his own store — for Brigham Young had a dry- 
 goods' and grocery store of his own at that time — and I was 
 to furnish the remainder. It was very little indeed that he 
 supplied, and therefore my account was likely to amount to a 
 considerable sum, for almost every wife had at least one 
 bonnet which she wished made over with new trimmings, 
 besides the new one. 
 
 I worked constantly for three weeks, with the assistance of 
 two girls, to each of whom I paid six dollars a week besides 
 board. This was a difficult thing for me to do at that time in 
 Utah, for money was seldom seen there then ; but I was 
 rejoicing in the prospect of the comfortable new furniture 
 
HOW BRIGHAM PAID FOR HIS WIVES* BONNETS ! 3^1 
 
 which I should have when it was all done. Furniture at that 
 time was very expensive ; there was nothing better than white 
 pine articles — stained or painted. The commonest kind of 
 wooden rocking-chair cost fifteen dollars, and common painted 
 wooden chairs were six dollars a piece, with everything else in 
 proportion. This being our first winter, we had not been able 
 to get much, and I thought I would devote the proceeds of 
 the work I was doing for Brigham to fitting up the house a 
 little ; and, with what I earned from my other customers, 
 I contrived to pay my help, so as to have all the rest clear. 
 
 All was I completed, and great satisfaction expressed at the 
 result of my labors. So I asked my husband to present my 
 account and, if possible, get it settled — it amounted to about 
 two hundred and seventy-five dollars, although I had dealt 
 very liberally with the Prophet, and had charged for the goods 
 but little more than they cost me. When he returned, I 
 hastened to meet him, for I had partly selected the furniture 
 and I wanted to go and purchase it. But I was like poor Per- 
 rette, the milkmaid, who counted her chickens a little too 
 soon ; for Mr. Stenhouse told me that Brother Brigham had 
 given orders that the amount should be credited to us for 
 tithittg ! What a shock this was to me ; for that sum, small 
 as it may appear, was my whole fortune at the time, and it 
 was gone at one sweep ! " Can it be possible," I said, " that 
 he can be so mean as that .' Where can his conscience be .' 
 or has he any ; to deprive me of my hard earnings in this 
 way. He shall not do it — I will make him pay me." 
 
 My indignation was so great that I did not reflect how 
 imprudent I was to talk thus of the Prophet of the Lord ; but 
 my husband said : " What can you do f You cannot help 
 yourself. You can do nothing but submit. Let us try to 
 forget it ; or, if not, it will perhaps be a lesson to us." But I 
 did not forget it and never could, although I tried very hard ; 
 and when many months had passed, and I no longer suffered 
 from the effects of my loss, I still remembered it — and I 
 always shall remember the way in which Brigham paid for his 
 wives' bonnets. 
 
CHAPTER XXV. 
 
 MYSTERIES OF THE ENDOWMENT HOUSE:— FEARFUL OATHS 
 AND SECRET CEREMONIES, 
 
 Saintly Privileges — The Origin of the Endowments — The Fraternity of the 
 Saints — Story of the Mysteries — Shocking Doings in Days Gone By — Whis- 
 perings of Terrible Deeds — How the Mormons Mind Their Own Business — 
 The Temple Garments — Inside the Endowment House — The Book of Life — 
 Our Robes and Our Oil Bottles^The Washings and Anointings — The High- 
 Pritstess — Invoking Blessings — The Mysterious Garment — A New Name — 
 The Garden of Eden — An Extraordinary Representation — The Duplicate of 
 the Devil — The First Degree — Terrible and Revengeful Oaths — The Punish-' 
 ment of the Apostate — Pains and Penalties of Betrayal — Grips and Pass- 
 words — The Mysterious Mark — Singular Apostolic Sermon — The Second 
 Degree — Secret and Significant Signs — Behind the Veil — The Third Degree 
 — Celestial Matrimony — Eight Hours of "Mystery" — I Justify Myself. 
 
 NOT many weeks after our arrival in Salt Lake City, my 
 husband told me that we might now enjoy the privilege 
 of going through the Endowment House. 
 
 This was intended as a great favor to tiSj on the part of the 
 authorities, for most people have to wait a long while before 
 receiving their Endowments ; but my husband's influence 
 and position in the Church was, I presume, the reason why 
 we were admitted so soon. 
 
 Now, I had heard so much of the Endowments and the 
 Endowment House that I quite dreaded to pass through this 
 ordeal. The idea of the whole ceremony was, that thereby we 
 should receive the special grace of God ; be united — man and 
 
THE MYSTERIES OF THE ENDOWMENT HOUSE. 353 
 
 woman — making one perfect creature; receive our inherit- 
 ance as children of God ; and, in fact, be made partakers of 
 the plenitude of every blessing. 
 
 All this sounds very well as a statement, but it is only the 
 statement which would be made from the ideal Mormon 
 standpoint. I had heard other things about the Endowments' 
 which did not present such a favorable impression, and 
 although I do not wish to record all the absurd stories which 
 were, and are, current among the Gentiles, I think it only 
 right that I should state what my own views were before we 
 received our privileges. 
 
 Joseph Smith, the Prophet, and very many of his early 
 associates belonged to the ancient and honorable order of 
 Freemasons. When he was initiated into the mysteries of 
 that society, and what position he attained therein, I do not 
 know ; but one thing is certain, that when he, under the 
 influence of his own peculiar religious fanaticism, endeavored 
 to engraft upon Freemasonry some of the leading ideas of the 
 new religion, he and those connected with him were publicly 
 disavowed by the lodges in the West. I .cannot without some 
 trouble give here any documentary evidence, but I may be 
 permitted, perhaps, to state that I have myself seen newspapers 
 of that period — and the West then was a very primitive 
 country — which contained formal official declarations duly 
 signed by respectable persons, stating that Joseph Smith and 
 others were no longer to be considered in fellowship with any 
 of the Western lodges. 
 
 The idea of a bond of brotherhood — secret and indissoluble 
 — seems ever to have been present in Joseph's mind. Whether 
 the germ of this idea was derived from Masonry, or not, is of 
 little moment. Gentlemen who certainly ought to know have 
 assured me that such a notion was altogether ridiculous ; but 
 of that, as a lady, I am, of course, not competent to judge. It 
 is, however, quite clear that the clannish or fraternal spirit 
 among the Mormons has always pre-eminently distinguished 
 them, and is just as noticeable at the present day as it was in 
 Joseph's time. 
 
354 THE MORMON IDEA OF LEGAL' MARRIAGE. 
 
 It has always been commonly reported, and to a great 
 extent believed, that the mysteries of the Endowment House 
 were only a sort of imitation — burlesque, it might be — of the 
 rites of Masonry ; but I need hardly say that this statement 
 when examined by the light of facts is altogether ungrounded 
 and absurd, as the reader will presently perceive. Still, the 
 notion that some deeply mysterious ceremony was celebrated 
 by the initiated has always possessed a charm to Gentile as 
 well as Mormon minds, and the most extravagant statements, 
 have been made in reference to the Endowment House ; — in 
 fact, to such an extent has this been the case, that most, if not 
 all, of the Saints who have passed through the House have 
 looked forward to the period of their initiation as a most 
 impressive and painful ordeal, and the influence of this feeling ' 
 I myself fully realised. 
 
 I knew well that no marriage was considered binding unless 
 it had been celebrated in that place. I knew that the Saints, 
 however long they might have been wedded, were under the 
 necessity of being reunited there before they could be con- 
 sidered lawfully married and their children legitimate. Accord- 
 ing to the highest Mormon Authority no marriage is valid 
 unless the ceremony is performed in the Temple. The 
 Temple is not yet built, and as Joseph, the Prophet said, " No 
 fellow c^n be damned for doing the best he knows how," the 
 Saints meanwhile do "the next best thing," and are married 
 in the Endowment House. I knew that there and then the 
 faithful were said to be "endowed" with their heavenly 
 inheritance. I saw how absolutely needful it was that my 
 husband and myself should become partakers of those mys- 
 teries ; but I was influenced by the strange stories which I 
 had heard of unhallowed and shameful doings in that same 
 Endowment House, and consequently I feared to enter in. 
 
 My fears were not, however, altogether groundless or 
 visionary. It has been whispered — falsely perhaps — that in 
 that Endowment House scenes have been enacted so fearful 
 that words would falter on the lips of those who told the tale 
 concerning them. I have heard of such things from men of 
 
WHISPERINGS OF TERRIBLE DEEDS. 355 
 
 integrity and honor; but they were not «ye-witnesses of 
 what they related, and they could not, or would not, give me 
 their authorities. One thing I am certain of ; — if such hor- 
 rible deeds were ever perpetrated within those walls there 
 remains no living vsritness to testify of them. The lips of 
 who alone could tell the whole truth are sealed in silence 
 which the trump of doom alone shall break. 
 
 When I refer the reader to what I have already spoken of 
 the Blood-Atonement, and of the " Reformation," I think that 
 that plain statement of facts renders it clear to any ordinary 
 intelligence, that, if in the Endowment House no such deeds 
 pf darkness were ever perpetrated, it was not because such 
 things were contrary to the spirit of Mormonism as taught by 
 Brigham Young and the Apostles, nor was it because such 
 things had never been done with the full approbation of the 
 leaders of the Church, but on account of some accidental 
 reason, into which it is needless to enquire. 
 
 It was, of course, no fear of any personal violence or any 
 painful disclosures in that respect that made me reluctant to 
 receive my Endowments, for at that time I was by profession 
 apparently a good Mormon ; — if I had my doubts and mis- 
 givings, I had them in common with nine-tenths of the Mor- 
 mon women, and had therefore nothing to fear. The true 
 cause of my reluctance was of a more delicate and personal 
 nature. I had been informed that, if I refused to go, my husband 
 could not go alone, he would be compelled to take another wife 
 and go with her. This was not all. I found that it was quite 
 common for the Elders to take a second wife when they took 
 their first Endowments, and thus, as they coarsely expressed 
 it, " kill two birds with one stone." Moreover, I had heard of 
 men who feared to introduce Polygamy into their households, 
 presenting to their wives, while going through the House, a 
 young girl as their intended bride, feeling sure that the wife 
 would not dare to make a scene before the Assembly. How 
 could I know that my husband also had not such an idea in his 
 mind .' True, I trusted him implicitly, and did not believe it 
 possible that he could deceive me. But had not men who 
 22 
 
3S6i PREPARING FOR THE CEREMONY. 
 
 were universally known for their integrity and honor acted in 
 the same way to their wives ; and with so many evidences of 
 the best and most honest natures being corrupted by the 
 unrighteous teachings of their religion, could I be blamed for 
 doubting him whom I loved best ? Wives out of Utah doubt 
 their own husbands, and very frequently have the best of 
 reasons for doing so, but what woman, other than a Mormon, 
 ever lived in constant dread that her husband, who she knew 
 was devotedly attached to her, would do to her the, cruellest 
 wrong that man can inflict and woman can endure, for the 
 sake of his religion and in the holy Saviour's name ? 
 
 My mind was agitated by conflicting thoughts. Sometimes 
 fear and apprehension, sometimes indignation and hatred 
 would make me feel perfectly reckless. Then love to my 
 husband, and thoughts of our little ones calmed my troubled 
 mind, and I was tranquil, until excited by some injury which I 
 witnessed, when once more brooding over the cruel wrongs 
 which, in God's name, had been inflicted upon the women of 
 Utah, my anger would revive again. 
 
 There was also another reason why I particularly objected 
 to passing through the Endowment House. I had been' told 
 many strange and revolting stories about the ceremonies which 
 were there performed, for it is said that in the Nauvoo Temple 
 the most disgraceful things were done. About what was done 
 at Nauvoo I can say nothing, as it was before my time, but 
 still it is only fair to say, that people who in every other rela- 
 tion in life I should have deemed most reliable and trustworthy 
 were my informants respecting those strange stories. Of the 
 Endowments in Utah I can, of course, speak more positively, 
 as I myself passed through them ; and I wish to say most dis- 
 tinctly that, although the initiation of the Saints into "The 
 Kingdom," appears now to my mind as a piece of the most 
 ridiculous absurdity, there was nevertheless nothing in it in- 
 decent or immoral ; — of which the reader himself shall pres- 
 ently be the judge. 
 
 It is an invariable rule among the Mormons, as I have before 
 intimated, for every man or woman to mind his or her own busi- 
 
WHY THE SECRET IS KEPT. 357 
 
 ness, and nothing else. In this respect they certainly present 
 a good example to the Gentile world. Thus it was, that until 
 I myself went through the Endowments, I was totally ignorant 
 of what they were ; although, of course, so many people with 
 whom I had daily intercourse could so easily have enlightened 
 me if they had been thus minded. With apostates, I, of course, 
 had nothing to do ; and, had it been otherwise, it is most prob- 
 able that they would have been so much ashamed of the folly 
 of the whole performance that they would not have spoken 
 explicitly about it. ^Besides this, every Mormon's mouth was 
 closed by the oath of that same Endowment House — the 
 penalty of breaking which was death — a penalty which no one 
 doubted would be sternly enforced. Thus, totally in the dark, 
 and remembering only the strange stories told about " wash- 
 ings " and " anointings " and an imitation of the Garden of 
 Eden, with Adam and Eve clothed in their own innocence 
 alone, it can be no wonder that any modest woman should wish 
 to evade all participation in such scenes. 
 
 I spoke to my husband about it, and he tried to reassure me, 
 but what he said had rather a contrary effect. 
 
 Before we left England, when speaking of these ceremonies, 
 my husband told me that they were simply a privilege and a mat- 
 ter of choice. But what a choice ! I might go or refuse to 
 go ; but, if I refused, he must — if he went through it all — take 
 another wife in my place — and, as I knew, there would be no 
 difficulty in finding one. I should in consequence be known as 
 a rebellious woman ; annoyance and indignity would be heaped 
 upon me ; while within my own home I should be compelled 
 to occupy the position of second wife — as the one who is 
 married first in the Endowment House is considered the first 
 wife and has the control of everything. My husband told 
 me that now he was most anxious to go : — he had already been 
 notified three times that such was his privilege, and there were, 
 he said, good reasons why we ought gladly to accept the op- 
 portunity. It was an honor, he said, for which many people 
 had waited for years. 
 
 My husband reminded me that we had been married by a 
 
3s 8 THE TEMPLE ROBES. 
 
 Gentile and while living among Gentiles, and that— as I said 
 before — our marriage was not valid, and our children were 
 not legitimate. Only those children of ours who were born 
 after the ceremony in the Endowment House would be legiti- 
 mate, — the others were outcasts from the " Kingdom " unless 
 we adopted them after our initiation, and thus made them 
 heirs. In any case, poor children ! they could never be con- 
 sidered the real\i&\x% — they could only be "heirs by adoption." 
 
 So I agreed to go, trying to persuade myself that it was a 
 sacred duty; for although my faith in Mormonism had been 
 roughly shaken, I still believed that its origin was divine. 
 
 As we had been but a few weeks in Utah we had not pre- 
 pared our " Temple garments," not thinking that we should be 
 called upon so soon to go through. We had therefore to bor- 
 row, as most people do, for the occasion. 
 
 The Temple robe, which is a long, loose, flowing garment, 
 made of white linen or bleached muslin, and reaching to the 
 ancle, had been placed upon us just before we took the oaths. 
 It was gathered to a band about twelve inches long, which 
 rested on the right shoulder, passed across the breast, and came 
 together under the left arm, and was then fastened by a linen 
 belt. This leaves the left arm entirely free. The veil consists 
 of a large square of Swiss muslin, gathered in one corner so 
 as to form a sort of cap to fit the head ; the remainder falls 
 down as a veil. The men wear the same kind of under gar- 
 ment as the women, and their robes are the same, but their 
 head-dress is a round piece of linen drawn up with a string 
 and a bow in front, something after the fashion of a Scotch 
 cap. All good Mormons, after they have received their first 
 Endowments, get whole suits of Temple robes made on pur- 
 pose for them so that they may be ready for use at any time 
 when they are needed. All marriages in the Endowment 
 House are performed in these robes, and in them all Saints 
 who have received their Endowments are buried. Besides our 
 robes we were instructed to take with us a bottle of the best 
 olive oil. 
 
 At seven o'clock in the morning of the day appointed, we 
 
INSIDE THE ENDOWMENT HOUSE. 359 
 
 presented ourselves at the door of the Endowment House, and 
 were admitted by Brother Lyon, the Mormon poet. Every- 
 thing within was beautifully neat and clean, and a solemn 
 silence pervaded the whole place. The only sound that could 
 be heard was the splashing of water, but whence the sound 
 proceeded we could not see. In spite of myself, a feeling of 
 dread and uncertainty respecting what I had to go through 
 Would steal over my mind, aind I earnestly wished that the day 
 was over. 
 
 We waited patiently for a little while, and presently a man 
 (Entered and seated himself at a table placed there for that pur- 
 pose, upon which was a large book. He opened the book, and 
 then calling each person in turn, he took their names and ages 
 and the names of their fathers and mothers, and carefully en- 
 tered eacli particular in the book. Our bottles of oil were 
 then taken from us, and we were supposed to he ready for the 
 Ceremony. 
 
 First we were told to take off our shoes and leave them in 
 the ante-room, and then to take up our bundles and pass into 
 another room beyond. This was a large bath-toom which was 
 divided down the middle by a curtain of heavy material placed 
 there for the pufpose of separating the men from the women. 
 Here my husband left me — he going to the men's and I to the 
 women's division. In the bath-room were two or three large 
 bathing tubs supplied by streams of hot and cold water. We 
 were as much concealed from the men as if we had been in an 
 entirely separate room, and everything was very quiet and 
 orderly. 
 
 Miss Eliza R. Snow, the poetess, and a Mrs. Whitney, were 
 the officiating attendants on that occasion. The former con- 
 ducted me to one of the bathing tubs, and placing me in it, she 
 proceeded to Wash me trom the crown of my head to the soles 
 of my feet. As she did this she repeated various formulas to 
 the effect that I was now washed clean from the blood of this 
 generation and should never, if I remained faithful, be partaker 
 in the plagues and miseries which were about to come upon 
 the earth. When I had thus been washed clean, she wiped 
 
360 WASHINGS AND ANOINTINGS : — A MYSTERIOUS GARMENT. 
 
 me dry, and then taking a large horn filled with the olive oil 
 which we had brought, she anointed me. The oil was poured 
 from the horn by Mrs. Whitney into the hand of Eliza Snow, 
 who then applied it to me. The horn was said to be the horn 
 of plenty which, like the widow's cruse of oil, would never fail 
 as long as the ordinance should continue to be administered. 
 In addition to the crown of my head, my eyes, ears and mouth 
 were also anointed ; my eyes that they might be quick to see, 
 my ears that they might be apt at hearing, and my mouth th^t 
 I might with wisdom speak the words of eternal life. She 
 also anointed my feet, that they might be swift' to run in the 
 ways of the Lord. I was then given a certain garment to 
 put on. :;. 
 
 Now this garment is one peculiar to the Mormon people; 
 It is made so as to envelop the whole body and it is worn 
 night and day. I was told that after having once put it on,. I 
 must never wholly take it off before putting on another, but 
 that I should change one half at a time, and that if I did so 
 I should be protected from disease and even from death itself ; 
 for the bullet of an enemy would not penetrate that garment, 
 and that from it even the dagger's point should be turned 
 aside. It has been said that the Prophet Joseph carelessly 
 left off this peculiar garment on the day of his death, and that 
 had he not done so the rifles of his assassins would have been 
 harmless against him. 
 
 When thus arrayed, I proceeded to put on a white night- 
 dress and skirt, stockings, and white linen shoes. A new name 
 was then whispered into my ear, which I was told I must never 
 mention to any living soul except my husband in the Endow- 
 ment House. This name was taken from the Bible, and I was 
 given to understand that it would be the name whereby I 
 should be admitted into the celestial kingdom. This was of 
 course very gratifying. A circumstance, however, occurred 
 which took from me all the pride which might have been mine 
 in the possession of a new name. There was among our num- 
 ber a deaf woman ; Mrs. Whitney had to tell her her name 
 once or twice over, loud enough for me to hear, and thus I 
 
A VOICE FROM BEHIND THE CURTAIN. 36I 
 
 found that her new name, as well as mine, was Sarah. To 
 make the matter worse, another sister whispered : " Why that 
 is my name too." This entirely dispelled any enthusiasm 
 which otherwise I might have felt. I could well understand 
 that I might yet become a Sarah in Israel, but if we all were 
 Sarahs, there would not be much distinction or honor in being 
 called by that name. As a matter of course I supposed that 
 the men would all become Abrahams. 
 
 Our washing and anointed being now over, we were ready 
 for the initiation — there were about fifteen couples in all. 
 
 A voice from behind the curtain asked Miss Snow if we 
 were ready, and was answered in the affirmative. We were 
 then arranged in a row, the curtain was drawn aside, and we 
 stood face to face with the men who had, of course, on their 
 side of the curtain been put through the same ordeal. I felt 
 dreadfully nervous, for I did not know what was coming next, 
 and I could not quite dismiss from my mind the stories that I 
 had heard about these mysteries. But in spite of my ner- 
 vousness, curiosity was strong in me at that moment — as it 
 was, I suppose, in the others ; for, as soon as the curtain was 
 drawn aside, we all cast our eyes in the direction of the men. 
 They, as might be expected, were looking in our direction, and 
 when I beheld them, I must say that my sympathies were 
 drawn out towards the poor creatures. However little vanity 
 or personal pride they possessed, they must have felt it 
 unpleasant to have to appear in the presence of ladies in such 
 a dress — or rather ?<;/dress ; and notwithstanding the solemn 
 meaning of the ceremony, there was just the ghost of a smile 
 upon our faces as we looked at each other and dropped our 
 eyes again. To any one who did not feel as we did the reli- 
 gious nature of the initiation, the scene must have appeared 
 perfectly ludicrous. In fact, some of us felt it so. One sister, 
 just as the curtain was drawn up and we came in full view of 
 our lords, cried out : " Oh dear, oh dear, where shall I go ? 
 What shall I do.'" This, as may be supposed, caused a laugh 
 which was, of course, immediately suppressed. 
 
 We could see how the men looked, but of our own appear-, 
 
$6i A LUDICROUS SC£NE : — VANITY At A DISCOUNT. 
 
 ance we could not so easily jtidge. Certainly, we must nave 
 looked anything but handsome in ouf white garments and 
 with the oil trickling down our faces and into our eyes, making 
 them smart and look ^ed. Thete Was nothing, however, fot 
 us to do but to Subniit qtiietly and make the best of it we 
 could. Ashamed as I Was, I thought 1 might ventufe to look 
 at my husband — there cduld be no harm in that; — but when 
 I saw his demure-looking countenance and his efforts to keep 
 his clothing in order, I thought I should be compelled to laiigh 
 outright, for I could see that his thoughts were more occupied 
 about his personal appearance than with the solemnity of the 
 occasion. The men were all dtessed in the same kind of gar- 
 ment as the women:' — drawers and shirt all in one -^ very 
 much like those which are iised fof children to sleep in—' 
 and over that an ordinary white shirt, such as men always 
 wear; — that, with socks and white linen. shoes, completed theit 
 toilet. 
 
 Clad after this interesting fashion, we sat opposite to each 
 other for several minutes, and then niy husband and myself 
 were instructed to come forward and kneel at the altar while 
 all the rest remained standing. It is the custom thus to select 
 two persons, and we were either picked out by chance, or !t 
 might be, as my husband was thought a good deal of by the 
 kuthorities, that they considered he would feel honored by the 
 preference. 
 
 Suddenly a voice was heard speaking to some one, who alsb 
 replied. This voice from the unseen was supposed to be the 
 voice of Elohim in conversation with Jehovah, and the words 
 that were used were much the same as those contained, in the 
 first chapter of the book of Genesis describing the cre&tioh 
 of the world. Finally, Jehovah and Elohim declare their 
 intention to come down and visit the earth. This they do, 
 and pronounce all that they behold very good ; but they declare 
 that it is necessary that one of a higher order of intelligence 
 than the brute creation should be placed in the world to 
 govern and control all else. 
 
 Michael the Archangel is now called, and he is placed ilpon 
 
THE DEVIL MAkES HIS APPEARANCE. 363 
 
 the earth under the name of Adam, and power is given him 
 over all the beasts of the field, the fowls of the air, and the 
 fishes of the Sea. Moreover the fruits of the earth are all 
 giveri to him for his sustenance and pleasure, but he is strictly 
 charged, as in Bible-story, not to eat of one particular tree 
 which stands in the midst of the garden. This tree is repre- 
 sented by a small real evergreen, and a few bunches of dried 
 raisins afe hung upon it as fruit. 
 
 It is now discovered that it is not good for man to be alone ; 
 Elohim and Jehovah, therefore, hold another conversation 
 upon that subject, ahd they finally determine to give a com- 
 panion to Adam. They, therefore, cause a deep sleep to fall 
 upon Michael — or Adam as he is now called — and tbey pre- 
 pare to Operate upon him. Here we were all instructed to 
 assume the attitude of deep sleep by dropping our heads upon 
 our breasts. Elohim and Jehovah then came down and go 
 through the motions of Removing a rib from the side of the 
 sleeper, which said rib appears immediately upon the scene in 
 the person of Eliza R. Snow. Elohim and Jehovah are gen- 
 erally represented by two of the Twelve Apostles. When 
 Brigham is present he plays a pr6minent part. 
 
 And now the devil makes his appearance in the person of 
 W. W. Phelps. Phelps used always to personate the devil in 
 the endowments, and the r6le suited him admirably. He is 
 dead now, but whether it has made any difference iii his status, 
 I dalitiot tell, nor do I know who has succeeded him in his 
 office. The devil wears a very tight-fitting suit of black mus- 
 lin, with knee breeches and black stockings and slippers. This 
 dress had all the appearance of a theatrical costume, and the 
 man himself looked as much like one might imagine the devil 
 tirould look, as he possibly could. He began by trying to 
 scrape acquaintance with Eve, whom he meets while taking a 
 walk in the garden. The innocent, unsuspecting woman is 
 fascinated by his attentions. Father Adam — who seems to 
 have had a touch of the Mormon about him — perhaps was not 
 the most attentive of husbands ; or he may have fallen into 
 the same error into vhich many of his sons have fallen sinC8 
 
364 THE GARDEN OF EDEN: ^TAKING THE "FIRST DEGREE." 
 
 — neglecting to pay the same attentions after marriage as he 
 was wont to before — and left his young wife to the mercy of 
 the tempter. However that may be, Satan and Eve are soon 
 discovered in conversation together, and Eve appears to be 
 particularly pleased with Satan. At length he offers her some 
 of the fruit of the forbidden tree, and after some little denuir 
 she accepts it and eats thereof. 
 
 Then the devil leaves her, Adam makes his appearance, and 
 Eve persuades him also to eat of the fruit of the tree. After 
 this they make a dumb show of perceiving their condition, 
 and an apron of white linen is produced, on which are sewn 
 pieces of green silk, in imitation of fig leaves, and in these they 
 both attire themselves. 
 
 Then all the brethren and sisters produced similar aprons 
 which they had brought with them on purpose, and these they 
 put on, as Adam and Eve had already done. Elohim now 
 appeared again, and called Adam ; but Adam was afraid, and 
 hid himself in the garden with Eve. The curse was now pro- 
 nounced upon the serpent^— the devil — who reappears upon 
 his hands and knees, making a hissing noise as one might sup- 
 pose a serpent would do. We were then all driven out of the 
 Garden of Eden, into another room which represented the 
 world ; — and this ended the " First Degree." 
 
 We were now supposed to be out in the world, earning our 
 daily bread by the sweat of our brows, and we were informed 
 that although we had been driven out from the presence of the 
 Lord, yet a plan of salvation would be devised for us, by 
 which we should be enabled to return to our first estate. 
 We were to wait patiently until this plan should be disclosed 
 to us. 
 
 There was here such a mixture of persons and events that 
 I could not exactly follow the idea that was intended to be 
 conveyed, — if there was any idea at all. Men representing the 
 ancient prophets entered, and gave instructions to the people to 
 prepare themselves for the first coming of our Saviour upon 
 earth. Then we were taught certain pass-words and grips ; 
 and then we were all arranged in a circle. The women 
 
THE TERRIBLE OATH OF SECRECY :-THE TRAITOR's PENALTY. 363 
 
 covered their faces with their veils, and we all kneeled down, 
 and, with our right hands uplifted towards heaven, we* took the 
 solemn oath of obedience and secrecy. We swore that by 
 every means in our power we would seek to avenge the death 
 of Joseph Smith, the Prophet, upon the Gentiles who had 
 caused his murder, and that we would teach our children to 
 do so ; — we swore, that without murmur or questioning, we 
 would implicitly obey the commands of the priesthood in 
 everything ; — we swore that we would not commit adultery — 
 which was explained to mean the takinj; of wives without the 
 permission of the Koly Priesthood ; — and we swore that we 
 would never, under any circumstances, reveal that which trans- 
 pired in the Endowment House. 
 
 The penalty for breaking this oath, which was worded in 
 the most startling and impressive way, was then explained to 
 us. — The throat of the traitor was to be cut from ear to ear ; 
 his heart and tongue were to be cut out ; and his bowels 
 were — while he was yet living — to be torn from him. In 
 the world to come, everlasting damnation would be his 
 portion. 
 
 Let not the reader think that this was merely an imaginary 
 penalty, or that it was expressed merely for the purpose of 
 frightening the weak-minded, for I have already shown that 
 punishments quite as horrible as that have been deliberately 
 meted out to the Apostate, the Gentile, and the suspected 
 Saint by the Mormon Priesthood. Th'C innocent blood which 
 cries for vengeance against Brigham Young and some of the 
 leaders of the Church is sufficient to weigh the purest spirit 
 which stands before the throne of God down to the nether- 
 most abysses of hell. 
 
 After these fearful oaths had been taken, with due solem- 
 nity, we were instructed in the various signs representing 
 those dreadful penalties ; and we were also given a " grip " 
 peculiar to this degree. 
 
 • I myself made a movement with my hand — for I believed that my life was 
 at stake and I dared not do otherwise. The words of the oath I did not utter. 
 [See explanation at the end of the chapter.] 
 
366 THE MYSTERIES OF THE "SECOND DEGREE." 
 
 We were next entertained by a long address from the 
 Apostle Heber C. Kimball. Never in my life — except from 
 Brigham Young — had I listened to such disgusting language, 
 and I trust I never shall be compelled to listen to anything 
 like it again. Brother Kimball always used to pride himself 
 upon using " plain " language, but that day I think he sur- 
 passed himself ; he seemed to take quite a pleasure in saying 
 anything which could make us blush. The subject of which 
 he discoursed was the married life in the " Celestial Order ;" 
 he also laid great stress upon the necessity of our keeping 
 silence concerning all that we had witnessed in the Endow- 
 ment House — even husbands to their wives, and wives to their 
 husbands were not to utter a single word. With the sermon 
 ended our " Second Degree." 
 
 We were now taken to another room for the purpose of pas- 
 Sing through the " Third Degree " of the Order of the Mel- 
 chisedec Priesthood. When we were all arranged on one side 
 against the wall, a number of individuals entered who werg 
 supposed to represent the ministers of every denomination and 
 religion upon the face of the earth. The devil also makes his 
 appearance again. The ministers set forth the various claims 
 of their respective creeds, — each one striving to show that his 
 is the purest and the best, — but the devil sows division and 
 hatred among them, and a good deal of confusion ensues. 
 
 Then canie in personages representing Peter, James, and 
 John, the Apostles, and they commanded ministers, devil, and 
 all, to depart. They then appeared to organise a new Church 
 in which the true principles of the Gospel were to be taught J 
 our Temple robes were also all changed from the right 
 shoulder to the left, indicating that we were now in the true 
 Church, and that we were to be absolutely and in every way 
 dependent upon the priesthood. Another grip was then given 
 to us, and thus we received the third degree of the Order of 
 Melchisedec Priesthood. In that room was a division made of 
 bleached muslin ; in the division a door and in the door a hole, 
 with a lap of muslin over it, through which to pass the hand. 
 Whoever was on the other side could see us, but we could not 
 
GRIPS AXD PASSWORDS OF THE "THIRD DEGREE," 367 
 
 see them. The men first approached this door. A person 
 representing the Apostle Peter appeared at the opening and 
 demanded who was there. He was told that some one desired 
 to enter. Hands came through the opening in the muslin 
 curtain, and mysterious fingers cut a mark on the left breast 
 of the men's shirts — one mark also over t^e abdomen, and one 
 over the right knee — ^which marks the women religiously imi- 
 tated upon their own garments when they got home. The 
 apphcant was then told to put his hand through the opening, 
 9.nd give the last grip belonging to the " Third Degree,'' and 
 mention his new name. He was then permitted to enter. 
 This was called " going b,ehind the veil." When the men 
 were all admitted, the women were suffered to approach, and 
 were passed through by their own husbands. When a woman 
 has no husband she is passed through by one of the brethren, 
 and to those who are not going to be married or sealed for 
 eternity here the ceremonies end. 
 
 Now, as I before stated, according to Mormon ideas, we had 
 never before been legally married. It was therefore neces- 
 sary that we should now pass through that ceremony. We 
 accordingly were conducted to a desk where our names were 
 entered and we were then passed into another room. In that 
 room was a long, low altar, covered with red velvet, and an 
 arm chair placed at one end of it, in which sat Brigham 
 Young. My husband knelt at one side of the altar and I at 
 the other, with our hands clasped above it in the last grip 
 which had been given to us. Then the ordinary formula of 
 marriage was gone through with, and we were informed that 
 we were sealed for time and for eternity. 
 
 Thus we passed through the mysteries of the Endowment 
 House, and at three o'clock in the afternoon we found our- 
 selves at liberty to return home. The various ceremonies had 
 occupied eight hours. 
 
 When we reached home, my husband said : " Well, what do 
 you think of the Endowments?" But I did not dare to 
 answer him truthfully at that time. Had I done so, I should 
 have told him that I was ashamed and disgusted. Never in 
 
368 "WHAT DO you think of the endowments?" 
 
 all my life did I suffer such humiliation as I did that day; for 
 the whole time, I was under the impression that those who 
 officiated looked upon us as a set of silly dupes, and I felt 
 annoyed to think that I dared not tell them so. So I told my 
 husband that I would rather not speak about it, and we never 
 have spoken of it to this day. What were his own feelings 
 about the matter, I do not know, for Mormon wives are taught 
 never to pry into their husband's feelings or meddle with their 
 actions. But notwithstanding all my feelings in reference to 
 the Endowments, so foolish was I, that when I afterwards 
 heard the brethren and sisters talking about the happiness 
 which they had experienced while. going through, and saying 
 how privileged we ought to feel at being in Zion among the 
 Saints of God, secure in His Kingdom where we could bring 
 up our children in the fear of the Lord, I began again to think 
 that the fault was all in myself, and that it was I who was 
 wrong and not the Endowments. I wondered how, with such 
 a rebellious heart, I should ever get salvation, and I mourned 
 to think that I had not accepted everything with the sim- 
 plicity of a child. 
 
 Some time after our initiation I met the Apostle Heber C. 
 Kimball, and he asked me how I felt upon the occasion. I 
 frankly told him all, but added that I regretted feeling so. 
 He said : " I shall see if you cannot go through again ; it is 
 not just the thing, but I shall try and make the opportunity." 
 Nothing more, however, was said about it. But that which 
 troubled hie most was the fact that while the oaths were being 
 administered, I dropped my hand and inwardly vowed that I 
 would never subscribe to such things, and at the same time 
 my heart was filled with bitter opposition. This, although I 
 did it involuntarily — my better nature rising within me and 
 overcoming my superstition — I thought at the time was sinfuL 
 I now, however, rejoice that such was the case ; for not 
 having actually vowed to keep secret those abominable oathSj 
 I can say, without any cavil or equivocation, that I have 
 broken no promise and betrayed no trust by the discoveries 
 which I have just made. 
 
"NO ONE CAN CHARGE ME WITH TREACHERY." 369 
 
 / wish distinctly to make this statement. Others have more 
 or less divulged the oaths of the Endowment House, and 
 have excused themselves with much doubtful sophistry. I 
 NEVER really took the oaths, although present, and therefore 
 no one can charge me with treachery. 
 
 At a later date, some of the sisters kindly suggested that 
 the spirit of the Evil One had entered into me at that time. 
 But this was at least a very inconsistent statement, for the 
 Mormons believe that no evil spirit can enter into the En- 
 dowment House, 
 
 Of one thing I am certain — I was then indeed a miserable 
 slave, with no one to stretch forth a kindly hand and strike 
 away the fetters of my mental degradation and lead me forth 
 into light and liberty. 
 
CHAPTER XXVI, 
 
 SECRETS OF SAINTLY SPOUSES :— A VISIT FROM MY TALK- 
 ATIVE FRIEND. 
 
 I Receive Congratulations — A " Bit of Advice " — How a Woman found Wives 
 for Her Husband — A " Rather Backward Man " — How a Mormon Hus- 
 band was Managed — Anxious for Alice to Marry — A Very Obedient Husband 
 — Marrying for Principle : Not Love — How Saints are Silly over New Wives 
 — Taking Life Easily — " Miss Alice ! We shall See " — Bringing Home a 
 " Sister "—Wife, Number Three— How a Wife Lost Her Influence— How 
 a Wife Consoled Herself Under Difficulties — Understanding the " Order of 
 the Kingdom " — The Necessity of Having Two Wives at Least — Not Need- 
 ful to Fall in Love — A Good Example. 
 
 NOT long after I had received my Endowments my talk- 
 ative friend, of whom I have already spoken, came to see 
 me and to offer her congratulations. She was quite enthusi- 
 astic upon the subject, spoke of the honor which had been con- 
 ferred upon us, and promised to call frequently to " build me 
 up." She was particularly anxious to learn whether I did not 
 feel much better and happier now. 
 
 On that point I could say little, for to have answered her 
 truthfully would have provoked discussion, into which I did 
 not care to enter. I knew, too, that anything I said to her 
 would soon be known to everyone else. So I told her that I 
 was feeling well enough. 
 
 " 'Well enough !' " she said, "Is that how you feel .' Come 
 
HOW A CERTAIN LADV MANAGED H£R HUSBAND. 371 
 
 now, I thought you would have got over all that when you had 
 been through your Endowments. You remind me of what 
 Brother Brigham says, — We have so many whining women in 
 Zion that it is quite a reproach. I do hope that you are not 
 going to become one of them. Let me give you a bit of 
 advice : The wisest thing you can do is to look out for another 
 wife for your husband, and get him to marry her." 
 
 " Oh My !" I said, " What are you talking about .? You 
 surely cannot be in earnest." 
 
 "I never was more earnest in my life," she answered. 
 If you had persuaded your husband to take another wife when 
 you went through your Endowments you would have got 
 over all your troubles at one time. The anticipation is ten 
 times worse than the reality." 
 
 " I do not see it in that light," I said. " My own opinion is 
 that my troubles in that case would only then have begun. I 
 do not think that you yourself are really happy." 
 
 " Oh, nonsense !" she exclaimed. " Why you can see how 
 happy I am. My husband has two other wives, besides myself, 
 and a more comfortable family could not be." 
 
 " You never told me," I said, " how your husband managed 
 to get those wives. I should like to hear." 
 
 " My husband managed ! Why he did not manage at all ; 
 ■it was I who arranged everything for him, and I'll tell you 
 how it was done. 
 
 " During the Reformation," she continued, " you, of course, 
 know the men were constantly urged to take more wives ; 
 but my husband was rather backward, and used to tell me 
 there was plenty of time and not the slightest occasion for 
 him to be in a hurry. I had my own opinion of the matter 
 and did not agree with him, for you see I was afraid that 
 after all, he would pick up some young girl or other and fall 
 in love with her, and all my plans would be disarranged. It 
 is you know much the best for the first wife' to look out for 
 some girl who will look up to her and respect her, but not love 
 her husband too much, and then they are likely to get on 
 .well together. If the first wife selects the other wives, it has 
 21 
 
372 - "they get used to it. 
 
 the effect of showing them that the husband thinks much of 
 her judgment and is willing to abide by it, and that they will 
 have to do the same. This, of coui'se, is as it should be. But 
 if she lets her husband choose his own wife, he is almost cer- 
 tain to take a fancy to some one whom the first wife does not 
 like at all, and consequently her authority is undermined. 
 The first wife ought to keep all the power in her own hands." 
 
 " Well," I said, " I should not care much, I think, who ruled 
 in my home if another wife was there." 
 
 " You think so now," she replied, " but when you get used 
 to Polygamy you will feel quite otherwise. People get used 
 to 'it — the women as well as the men — and then they leave off 
 fretting and become less selfish. But I was going to tell you 
 how I managed my husband. 
 
 " I was very anxious, as I told you, to find another wife for 
 him, and I took into consideration all the suitable girls I 
 knew. There was some objection to almost every one. Some 
 were too pretty and I knew I should detest them ; and others 
 were not good-looking, and those my husband could not beai*. 
 So I waited patiently, but did not give up the hope of suc- 
 ceeding eventually. At last I met with a girl who I thought 
 would do. She was certainly not bad-looking, but she was 
 very young and I thought I should be able to manage her. 
 The name of this girl was Alice Maynard ; she was a neigh>- 
 bor of ours, and one of a large family. She seemed to me to 
 be a quiet, modest little creature, and I knew that she had to 
 work hard and received very little in return. In fact, she led 
 at home a life of drudgery, and even her very clothing bore 
 witness to the poverty of the family. Her mother had often 
 told me that she felt badly for Alice, for Mr. Maynard had 
 three other wives and it was more than he could do to sup- 
 port them all properly 
 
 " I called one day upon Mrs. Maynard to broach the matter 
 to her. She received me very kindly and entered into my 
 views at once. She was anxious, she said, for Alice to get 
 married, for then she would be better off. I asked her how 
 she would like her to marry my husband, and told her that we 
 
PROPOSING BY PROXY. ^73 
 
 were very comfortably off, as you know we are, and that my 
 husband owned his house and lot and was doing a very good 
 business, and, of course, ought to take another wife. Would 
 she agree to my proposal and let me mention Alice to him ? 
 
 " She said, she herself, had no objection, but that perhaps my 
 husband might not like Alice, or Alice might not like him. 
 
 " I felt indignant at the idea that any girl should hesitate to 
 marry my husband, and I told Sister Maynard that there could 
 not possibly be any hesitation on Alice's part. ' I'm sure I 
 have no objection,',she said, 'if Alice has none. I should 
 only be too happy to see my child in a more comfortable 
 home.' 
 
 " Well then, we'll consider the matter settled, I said, and 
 asked if I could see Alice ; so her mother called her in, and I 
 proposed to her for my husband. You can guess, perhaps, 
 how astonished I was when she actually laughed in my face 
 and said she should like to consider the matter ! I did not, 
 however, show her what I thought, but assented to what she 
 said, and invited her to come and take tea with us. 
 
 " My husband had often told me, when I was teasing him 
 about taking another wife, that he would willingly marry any 
 girl I might choose for him ; and I felt pleased at this for it 
 showed confidence in my judgment. So when he came in, 
 later in the day, I told him I had found a wife for him at last, 
 and that I knew he would like her. ' Why, Ann,' he said, 
 ' I do believe you are going crazy over the wife question ; but 
 if you are I do not want you to drive me crazy also. I rea:lly 
 thought this was too bad, after all my trouble for him ; but nev- 
 ertheless I was resolved that the marriage should take place. 
 
 " Three days after that, in accordance with my invitation, 
 Alice came to take tea with us, and I fixed her up to look 
 nice. When she was ready, I took her into the parlor to 
 introduce her to my husband who was sitting there reading.- 
 Henry, I said, this is Miss Maynard — the young lady of whom 
 I spoke to you the other day. He looked up from his paper, 
 and, to my astonishment, said, ' Why, Alice, my girl, how do 
 you do ? How are mother and father ? ' 
 
374 AN INTERVIEW WITH MISS ALICE. 
 
 " What ; I said, do you inow Alice, Henry ? 
 
 " ' Certainly I do,' he answered, ' Alice and 1 have met 
 many times before this, haven't we, Alice?' 
 
 " ' Yes, sir,' she said, and, oh, so demurely. Why, Sister 
 Stenhouse, I began to think that I had actually been deceived, 
 and that while I had innocently supposed that I had found out 
 the girl myself, it was the very one upon whom my husband had 
 had his eye for a long while past. I watched them, however, 
 very narrowly, for I was determined that if my husband 
 had really taken a fancy for the girl he should never have 
 her." 
 
 " Why, that would have facilitated matters, would it not ? " 
 I said. 
 
 "Do you think," she replied, "that I would have allowed 
 them to marry, if they loved each other .' No, indeed I The 
 Saints marry from principle and not from love, as Brother 
 Brigham has often told us. I hope you believe me, dear, 
 when I say that I'm not at all a jealous woman, but if my 
 husband dared to fall in love with a girl and to hide it from 
 me, I could not stand it I am sure. No ! principle is the only 
 thing, — there can be no love in Polygamy. If a man loved 
 his wife do you think he could have the heart to pain her by 
 taking another.' On the other hand, it is because of the 
 love which still remains in their hearts, and which they weary 
 themselves to crush out, that so many of the first wives are 
 miserable. But I was going to tell you about Alice. I was 
 mistaken in thinking that my husband had been paying her 
 any attentions. It appeared that he was acquainted with her 
 father and mother, and that at their house he had frequently 
 seen the child Alice, but never supposed she was the Miss 
 Maynard of whom I had spoken. But now they had come 
 together at last he took to her kindly and she to him, and 
 really I sometimes almost thought that they wished to ignore 
 me altogether. 
 
 "I did not let them waste much time fussing with one 
 another, but they got on very rapidly, nevertheless ; and before: 
 I had had time to arrange matters properly, my husbaiid told 
 
ASTONISHED AT THE CHANGE. "375 
 
 tne that to please me he was going to marry AlLfe. Only 
 fancy me being pleased at him marrying . Alice ! Why, it 
 wasn't to please myself that I introduced thfe child to him, but 
 simply because, if he must have another wife, it was certainly 
 best for me to choose one whom I could manage. However, 
 they were married not long after, and really I think I never 
 was more disgusted in my life than I was on that occasion. 
 I was not jealous, but I do think he might have paid her a 
 little less attention. In fact I quite regretted, when it was 
 too late, that I had ever brought them together. 
 
 " The Mormon men always do make themselves silly over 
 their new wives, and I did not expect my husband to be an 
 exception to the rule ; but I was perfectly astonished at the 
 change that took place in Alice. Instead of the quiet, modest 
 girl she used to be, she put on all sorts of airs, and treated me 
 as if I were of not the slightest consequence. I couldn't 
 Stand that, and I resolved, if it were only to take the pride 
 out of her, I would get my husband to marry another wife 
 still. He wouldn't object, I knew, for he takes life very 
 easily and he has a great respect for my opinion. Besides . 
 which, he is quite well enough off to support three wives, and 
 as a matter of duty, if nothing else, he ought to do so. That 
 would soon bring Miss Alice to a proper state of mind, and 
 she needed something of the sort, for, do you know, she had 
 actually made that silly husband of mine think that she ought 
 to be treated with the same consideration as myself." 
 
 " Well but," I said, " if the principle of Polygamy is of God, 
 it is only just that all the wives should be treated alike. If 
 my husband were to marry another woman, much as it would 
 pain me, I should certainly treat her as an equal." 
 
 " Then;" she- replied, " if you do so you will find that the 
 first wives will have nothing to do with you. You will find, 
 when you come to be better acquainted with the people here, 
 that the first wives do not waste much love over the poly- 
 gamic wives ; and, of course, as a rule, the polygamic wives 
 detest the first wives. Then the plural wives get together 
 and talk all manner of evil about the first wives, who do pretty 
 
376 SISTER Ann's labor of love. 
 
 much the same in respect to them. It is only natural that 
 they should do so. 
 
 "But I was going to tell you," she continued, "how I 
 selected the third wife. There was an emigrant-train expected 
 in every day ; and you know, when the emigrants arrive, all 
 those women who want wives for their husbands, and all 
 those men who want tq choose for themselves, go down to the 
 camping-ground, and if they see a girl who takes their fancy, 
 they ask her if she has got a place to go to, and if she has not 
 they offer to receive her themselves. There are hundreds of 
 young girls who arrive here without any one to look after 
 them, and who are only too glad to accept a home for the 
 winter. Now this was exactly what I did. I went down to 
 the camp and looked round for myself, and at last my eyes 
 rested upon a young woman of about thirty or thirty-five 
 years of age, who I thought would be a more suitable wife for 
 my husband than that giggling chit that I chose for him at 
 first. I decided at once that she would do, so I went up to 
 her and asked her if she had any friends. She said she had a 
 brother living in the City ; but when I explained to her how 
 we were situated and said that I should like her to come and 
 stay with us till she could look round a little for herself, she 
 agreed at once. Now — I thought — -Miss Alice, we shall see 
 whether you are going to have things all your own way any 
 longer ! 
 
 " I told her, however, as well as my husband, that I had 
 brought home a sister to stay with us awhile, and they 
 received her very kindly, and she soon made herself very 
 useful and agreeable to us all. The Bishop came and talked 
 to my husband, and he made no difficulty at all in acceding to 
 my wishes, and before long he made our visitor — wife, number 
 three ; and Alice, as a matter of course, lost a good deal of her 
 influence over him. For my own part, I am much more com- 
 fortable. The two plural wives do nearly all the work, and I 
 -have Httle else to do than superintend the household and 
 enjoy myself. My husband is one of those quiet sort of men 
 who never interfere with domestic affairs, and I have matters 
 
"SET ONE TO WATCH THE OTHER. 377 
 
 pretty much my own way now. The only thing that annoys 
 me is his fondness for Alice who makes herself appear most 
 amiable to him, deceitful thing ! I can't break him of that, 
 but I otten tell him that he will find her out some day. He 
 tells me that he looks upon her as a child and feels like a 
 father towards her ; no woman, he says, can ever have his 
 love but me. That sounds all very well, but as for believing 
 it, that is quite another thing : — I keep my eye on them and 
 watch them well." 
 
 " But," I said', " if appears to me that it would have been far 
 better if you had never given him another wife at all. You 
 would have been saved from annoyance, and the privacy of 
 your home would not have been disturbed. I am the more 
 surprised, as your husband did not himself desire it." 
 
 " When you understand better the order of the kingdom, 
 you will not speak in that way," she said. " Do you suppose 
 that I should be satisfied to be the wife of a man who could 
 not exalt me in the celestial kingdom — a man with only one 
 wife .^ Why I have often told my husband that if he did not 
 get other wives I would leave him. It is necessary for a man 
 to have two wives at least if he would enter into the celestial 
 kingdom. That is why I have been so anxious to get wives 
 for my husband. At the same time there is no necessity 
 for him to fall in love and act in a silly way over them. The 
 only way in such a case is to set one to watch the other, and 
 then they are pretty certain to keep the old man straight. 
 You think, perhaps, that I don't feel all this, but you must 
 not be deceived by appearances. I try to do the will of 
 Heaven with a smile on my face ; and the brethren have 
 often told me that if the other sisters were more like me they 
 would not have so much difficulty in establishing Polygamy. 
 But, dear me, Sister Stenhouse, what a long talk we've had ! 
 I'll come and see you soon again, but I must hasten away 
 now, for my husband will be home to supper by this time." 
 
 So she left me wondering over her strange story of a 
 woman's experience in supplying her own husband with 
 wives. 
 
CHAPTER XXVII. 
 
 SOCIAL LIFE IN SALT LAKE CITY :— BALL-ROOMS, "WALL. 
 FLOWERS," AND DIVORCE. 
 
 Seeking for Old Friends — In the Bail-Room — Social Life — How Brother' 
 Brighara Built a Theatre — Short-Sightedness of the Prophet — Poets and 
 Polygamy Disagree — What a Woman Would Think — The Ideal of True 
 Love — Unpleasant Comparisons — Bearing the Cross — Rather Old Boys — Sub- 
 duing a Wife and Getting a Wife — What the Wives Say in Secrets-Intro- 
 duced to An Apostle's Five Wives — " I'm Afraid You are Not Too Strong 
 in the Faith "—The " Model Saint " — Improved Prospects— An Old Friend 
 Discovered — Another Victim to Polygamy — A Divorce for Ten Dollars ! — 
 Pin-Money for Brother Brigham's Wives — Four Husbands of a Girl of Twenty- 
 One !— How Will the Knot be Untied ? 
 
 SPRING opened bright and beautiful, and I began to feel 
 more at home in Zion and more contented with my posi- 
 tion. I do not, however, mean that I was satisfied with 
 Polygamy or that I contemplated calmly the prospect of my 
 husband taking a plurality of wives ; but that I had begun to 
 adapt myself to the manners and customs of the Saints, and 
 had already formed many of those pleasant intimacies which 
 lend such a charm to life. 
 
 My talkative friend was a constant visitor at our house ; 
 and her strange views of life and of that all-absorbing subject 
 — the management of man under the plural wife system — 
 together with her lively conversation and unceasing flow of 
 spirits, made her visits acceptable ; and she often banished 
 from my mind thoughts which, if unchecked, would have made 
 
"TWO FACES I LONGED TO SEE. 379 
 
 my life unbearable. Her husband, too, poor creature, some- 
 times followed in her train, and on one occasion she actually 
 brought Alice with her that I might see what sort of a girl 
 she was. I found her quite good-looking, intelligent, and as 
 pleasant a little body as one could wish to know ; but, at the 
 same time I detected in the expression of her features — lively 
 and self-reliant as she was — too many traces of that look of 
 subdued sadness which casts a cloud over the countenance of 
 every woman living in Polygamy. 
 
 Other friends, be^es, I had, too numerous to mention — 
 friends whom I had known in England, with whom I had 
 wept over the horrors of Polygamy when it was first an- 
 nounced ; and dear Swiss friends, not a few, who had come 
 to Zion before us and were now quite settled and at home; 
 
 Two faces I longed to see, but of their owners I could at 
 first get no tidings. Poor, dear Madame Bailiff — my old Swiss 
 friend, who in past days had shown me so many kindnesses 
 and whom I had so tenderly loved — ^where was she .-• Some- 
 where, I knew, in Zion, but not in Salt Lake City ; and to the 
 chapter of accidents, I felt that I must leave it, whether I ever 
 saw her again or not. And there, too, was Mary Burton, with 
 all her sweet, winning ways — she whom I had known as a 
 child ; whose early womanhood had been darkened by appre- 
 hensions of that accursed abomination — Polygamy ; who had 
 suffered that terrible martyrdom upon the Plains ; who, for 
 aught I knew, might at that very time need most my sympathy 
 and sisterly love— Oh, where was she .' Poor Mary ! Might 
 it not be, that ^vorn out with the fearful sufferings which she 
 had endured, sHe had gone to that peaceful rest which she had 
 so vainly sought on earth ? I had asked every one who came 
 across my path, who was likely to know, whether they could 
 give me any information as to where she was ; but I could 
 learn nothing more than that, not long after their arrival, she 
 and her husband had left the city and had gone to one of the 
 Settlements in Southern Utah. I had, therefore, to wait in 
 uncertainty for any chance which might accidentally bring us 
 again together. 
 
3 So THE BALL SEASON IN SALT LAKE CITY. 
 
 I was very glad that the winter was over, for we had had 
 rather a rough time during our first few months in Salt Lake 
 City, and the various associations of our life had tended rather 
 to strengthen than to relieve my apprehensions respecting the 
 future. The ball season, which, of course, I cannot pass by 
 in silence, had been a source of annoyance, and, I may say, 
 disgust to me. I had seen so much that was unpleasant at 
 those balls ; and although what I witnessed did not then 
 affect me personally, yet it was painful to see others suffer, 
 and to hear poor women, whose hearts were crushed and broken, 
 tell to each other in whispers the sorrow which had blighted 
 their existence. 
 
 Dancing was always very popular among the Saints, and the 
 leading men among them have wisely fostered a taste for it. 
 When the people first went out to Utah, as may be supposed, 
 life was hard and amusements were few. The Mormons, as a 
 body, are examples of industry and diligence ; to them labor 
 is one of the cardinal virtues ; and like all other pioneers- 
 they found plenty of employment for their energies. Houses 
 had to be built, land prepared for cultivation, the commonest 
 necessaries of life to be manufactured or raised ; and busy 
 hands were perpetually engaged in a thousand useful indus- 
 tries. But when the day was over, and the dust of toil was 
 washed from the careful brow, it was but natural that the need 
 of a little recreation should be felt. 
 
 So in very early days Brigham built a theatre, and a very 
 fair amount of histrionic talent was developed among the 
 Saints. The Social Hall, in which were held balls, public 
 entertainments, and other amusements, was used for his- 
 trionic performances before the theatre was built. Brigham 
 owned the theatre. Money was to be made out of it ; and 
 the chance of making money Brother Brigham never per- 
 mitted to slip through his fingers. Brigham's eyes were sharp 
 enough to see that a theatre would be to him a source of 
 profit, but he did not look far enough. That theatre, — under 
 the immediate direction of the Prophet ; with his own 
 daughters acting in it ; with the plays which were performed 
 
BRIGHAM young's THEATRE. 38I 
 
 under his own censorship — has been one of the many causes 
 which have perceptibly, although perhaps indirectly, shaken 
 the hold which Mormonism had upon many a woman's mind. 
 
 A man would probably witness the performance of a play 
 and return from the theatre with no other thought than the 
 remembrance of an hour's amusement. But not so a woman. 
 To her the play suggested something more, and her daughters 
 would share her thoughts. Daily and hourly, it might be, the 
 effects of Polygamy would be brought under their notice as a 
 matter affecting thsmselves personally. They might be firm 
 in the faith, but the observant instincts of their sex could 
 never be wholly crushed. They would notice the neglect 
 which wives endured even from good husbands ; they would 
 see a man leaving the wife of his youth, the mother of his 
 children, and careless of the cruel wrong he did her, leave her 
 in lonely sorrow Tvhile he was spending his time in love- 
 making with some young girl who might have been his 
 daughter. They would see a wife crushing out from her heart 
 the holiest impulses which God had implanted there, striving 
 to destroy all affection for him whose dearest treasure that 
 affection should have been, because, indeed, Polygamy could 
 not exist with love. They would see, and know, and them- 
 selves personally feel, the degradation and' misery of the 
 " Celestial Order of Marriage " ; and that to them would be 
 the practical picture of life. 
 
 But in the theatre — short-sighted Brigham, to allow it to be 
 so ! — another picture would be presented for their consider- 
 ation, — a picture, it might be, ideal in its details and surround- 
 ings, but true to the letter in the lesson which it conveyed 
 and the thoughts which it suggested. The disgusting, the 
 brutalising cruelties of Polygamy were never represented on 
 the stage. Thoughts so coarse, so sensual, could never in- 
 spire the true poet's pen. No ; the tale of love as the poet 
 tells it, is all that is refined, and chaste, and delicate, and pure 
 -+-the commingling of two souls, the unison of two loving 
 hearts, the hopes, the aspirations, the tender joyful sorrows of 
 two fond natures — of two alone! Such is the picture pre- 
 
382 A STARTLING COMPARISON. 
 
 sented as the ideal of the beautiful and of the good. ' Then, 
 too, the delicate attentions of the devoted lover — his happiness 
 even in the shadow of a smile from her, — the lofty pedestal 
 upon which to his imagination she stan'ds, a queen and peer- 
 less ; — or the confiding love of the heroine of the story-^ 
 blushingly confessing to herself that there is one heart on 
 earth which is all her own and in which none but herself can 
 ever rule or reign. 
 
 The Mormon women are not devoid of common sense, 
 nor are they destitute of those quick perceptions which under 
 all circumstances distinguish their sex. They see on the stage 
 representations of the happiness attendant upon love and mar- 
 riage, such as God ordained, and such as finds a response in 
 every heart ; and they compare such pleasant pictures with 
 what they know and have witnessed of Polygamy, and they 
 draw painful inferences therefrom. Their faith may be proof 
 against apostasy, but the impression left upon their minds 
 produces its effect notwithstanding. 
 
 Another institution was the dance Brigham and the lead- 
 ers knew that it would never do to leave the people without 
 amusements of some kind, and thus the balls and social gath- 
 erings were originated. The idea of Prophets, Apostles, High- 
 Priests, and Patriarchs attending a ball and joining in a dance 
 must appear grotesquely incongruous to the Gentile mind ; 
 but out among the Mormons it is quite the thing ; and to the 
 men those balls and parties were very pleasant. 
 
 I do not think that many of the Mormon women enjoyed 
 the ball season, and I know to some of them it was the most 
 painful part of their lives. It is a cruel thing for a woman 
 anywhere to know that her husband's affections are divided, 
 that she is not his only love, and that his heart is no longer 
 all her own. But far worse is the lot of the wife in Utah. 
 She has to see and be present when the love-making is going 
 on, when her husband is flirting and saying soft nonsense, or 
 looking unutterable things at silly girls who are young enough- 
 to be her daughters ; — nay, her own daughters and her hus- 
 band's may actually be older than the damsel he is courting 
 
ilATHER OLD "BOYS." 383 
 
 fpr his second wife ! Such an outrage upon the holiest feel- 
 ings of womanhood would not for a moment be tolerated in 
 any civilised community ; but among the Saints women are 
 taught that this is but one part of that cross which we all 
 have got to bear. Cross-bearing is all very well, and I do not 
 doubt that sorrow and trial have a sanctifying influence upon 
 the soul, but by all means let us have a fair division of the 
 burden. It is not just that the heaviest end of the beam 
 should be placed on poor, weak woman's shoulders, and that 
 her " lord " should even find pleasure in that cross which 
 weighs her to the dust and crushes out from her weary soul 
 the last sparks of love, and happiness, and hope ! How sweetly 
 did the men preach patience and submission to the will of 
 Heaven. I. wonder where their own patience and submission 
 would have been had matters been reversed and their wives 
 had been taught that it was their privilege and a religious duty 
 to court, and flirt with and marry men younger and handsomer 
 than their husbands ! 
 
 The brethren never forget what Brother Brigham once said 
 about the Mormon men being all boys under a hundred years- 
 of age, and they do not neglect their privileges. Here in the 
 ball-room you may see men of three-score years and even older , 
 joining in the dance with girls of sixteen and even younger — 
 making love to them, flirting with them, marrying them. Age 
 or plain looks are nothing with such men ; the girls are taught 
 that they can exalt them to greater honor and happiness in 
 heaven than young and untried men could, and that they ought 
 to feel honored by receiving tender attentions from the chosen 
 servants of the Lord. Olie wife, or even half-a-dozen, if they 
 chance to have so many, of course will not stand in the way. 
 The husband is the lord and master, and a woman's wishes 
 count for nought. 
 
 In the ball-room the company of the first wives and, in fact, 
 of many of the plural wives, — once worshipped, but who " had 
 had their day " — was not so much sought as that of young and 
 interesting maidens ; and after having stood up with their • 
 husbands in the first dance, as a matter, of form, many ot those 
 
384 THE "WALLFLOWERS." 
 
 forlorn wives might be seen sitting along the sides of the" hall, 
 keeping each other company and talking over their sorrows. 
 We used to call these poor ladies " the wall-flowers." Sitting 
 there watchful, noting all that their husbands did or said, those 
 poor women were in themselves a touching protest against the 
 cruelty of the system, such as none but a Mormon heart could 
 have resisted. 
 
 But for that horrible system, these balls and parties would, 
 of course, have been extremely pleasant. With the feeling of 
 fraternity which exists among the Saints, such gatherings 
 ought only to be a source of pleasure ; but Polygamy blighted 
 everything, and it is with feelings almost of hatred that I re- 
 call some of those occasions. How many an aching heart has 
 there felt weary — felt so weary as to long for death. No 
 change of feature might betray the mental struggle, but the 
 bitterness of the soul was all the same. And I have seen 
 wives there whose husbands paid them marked attentions, so 
 that the girls to whom they were making love might notice 
 their devotion and draw favorable auguries for the future in 
 case thej married them. And the wife has known all this, 
 and has valued her husband's attentions accordingly. And 
 yet the poor deluded women persuade themselves that this 
 system is right and in accordance with the revealed will of 
 God ; and they think that the evil — poor creatures !^is in 
 their own hearts and that they deserve to suffer.. 
 
 The Mormon men sometimes would be rather surprised, I 
 think, if they could hear what their wives say of them at those 
 balls. I have seen very obedient wives so goaded to anger by 
 the conduct of their husbands that they have said very bitter 
 things indeed ; and what was not spoken, was felt, I know, by 
 every wife in whose nature the last traces of womanly feeling.' 
 had not been altogether crushed out. 
 
 At one of those balls the Apostle Heber C. Kimball came 
 up to me and said in his jesting way that he would introduce 
 me to his wife. He brought up five or six ladies of various 
 ages, one after the other, and said : " There now, I think I'll 
 quit now, for I'm afraid you're not too strong in the faith." 
 
A MODEL SAINT. 385 
 
 " Are these all you have got ? " I asked. 
 
 " Oh dear no," he said, " I have a few more at home, and 
 about fifty scattered over the earth somewhere ; but I've never 
 seen them since they were sealed to me in Nauvoo, and I hope 
 I never shall again." 
 
 Heber.was called the model Saint !" 
 
 But the ball season passed, and the spring came on and our 
 prospects began to brighten. My husband not only found re- 
 munerative employment for his pen in Salt Lake City, but was 
 also engaged as special correspondent to the New York Herald, 
 and several of the California papers. 
 
 One morning, a countryman, roughly dressed and looking 
 the picture of care, called at our house and asked to see Mr. 
 Stenhouse. I gazed at him for a moment, for I thought there 
 was something familiar in the sound of his voice. He looked 
 at me and I at once recognised him — it was Monsieur Baliff 
 himself, in whose house we had lived in Switzerland. But, oh, 
 how changed he was ! Once a refined, handsome, gentlemanly 
 man ; now a mere wreck of his former self-^-careworn, rough- 
 looking, poorly clad. He and his family had been in Utah six 
 years, and had suffered all the ills that poverty can induce :— - 
 the change which was wrought in him was so greats that for 
 some moments I was so overcome by my feelings that I could 
 not utter a word. In the few short years which had elapsed 
 since I saw him in his own bright and happy home, he had 
 become quite an old man. I hardly dared to ask about his 
 wife, for I feared what his answer might be ; but after a little 
 while he told me that she had sent her love and would like to 
 see me whenever I could find an opportunity to call upon her. 
 They lived some miles from the City, but I told him that I 
 would not fail to visit them whenever it was possible for me to 
 do so. 
 
 I talked a long while with Monsieur Baliff, and was much 
 interested in what he told me. He made no complaints; he 
 had still firm faith in Mormonism, and said that if the brethren 
 had not dealt fairly by him they would be answerable to God 
 for what they had done. "Besides," he added, " I do not blame 
 
386 MY SWISS FRIEND. 
 
 them so much, for they are Americans and would not be happy 
 if they did not get the advantage in some way." 
 
 I was anxious to ask him if he had been induced to take 
 another wife, as he had been in Utah during the " Reforma- 
 tion," and I did not see how it was possible for him to have 
 escaped ; but while I was thinking how I might put the ques- 
 tion delicately, he saved me the trouble by himself telling me 
 that he had married the young servant girl whom his wife had 
 taken from Switzerland with her. This information was quite 
 a shock to me, for I well knew the proud spirit of his wife and 
 I could realise what anguish this second marriage must have 
 : caused her,; I did not, however, like to question him on the 
 subject. So I turned the conversation into another channel, 
 and when he went away I sent kind messages to Madame 
 Baliff, saying that I would seize the very first opportunity of 
 hearing from her own lips the story of all they had gone through. 
 Here again I found the trail of that monster — Polygamy. 
 This time in the home' of my dearest friend. From the mof 
 ment when she and I had mingled our tears together, in Switzer-- 
 land, over that abomination, life had been to me one long, 
 weary, sickening battle with my own heart, one futile attempt 
 to fully convince myself that Polygamy was right and that I 
 was wrong. I certainly did believe, or thought that I believed, 
 the doctrine was true. But at times Nature prevailed in the 
 struggle, and womanly indignation and anger rose in arms 
 against Faith. These feelings were, however, at once and un- 
 hesitatingly subdued ; Faith returned triumphant and I was 
 again convinced that the Revelation must have been the will 
 of the Lord, and that my duty was to submit but not to ques- 
 tion. In moments of comparative self-control I had even tried, 
 as a Missionary's wife, to justify it to others, but only to wit- " 
 ness an outburst of sorrow and anger, and to feel still more 
 the weakness of my position. That had been my own ex- 
 perience ; but how had the time passed with my dear old 
 friend ? She must, no doubt, have been as greatly disappointed 
 as I was when she came to Zion and saw things as they really 
 were, and not as they bad been represented to us. 
 
THE REALITIES OF 3AINTLY LIFE. 387 
 
 My own eyes had certainly been opened not a little since 
 my arrival. Instead of finding the people enjoying the com- 
 forts and blessings of life, which we had been taught were 
 strewn around them in profuse abundance, we fqund among 
 all but the leading families the greatest poverty and priva- 
 tion. The majority of the people were living in little log or 
 adobe houses, of one or at the utmost two rooms, of most 
 primitive construction, and without the slightest convenience 
 of any description. Their food was bread, and molasses, aiid 
 it might be an occasional morsel of meat ; but many of them 
 scarcely even induced in the latter or in any article of 
 grocery, for months at a time. Their floors and walls were 
 bare, and their clothing poor and scanty ; and yet, destitute 
 as they were of all the comforts and conveniences of life, they 
 were conscientiously endeavoring like good Saints to practice 
 Polygamy, because, as they believed, the Lord had com- 
 manded it. 
 
 In respect to education they were in even a worse position. 
 Books, pictures, and periodicals of any kind there were none, 
 with the exception of that dreary organ of the Church, the 
 " Deseret News" — the soporific influence of which some 
 wicked Apostate has likened to a dose of Winslow's soothing 
 syrup ; — Brigham Young, himself an illiterate mto, and the 
 leading Elders frowned upon every attempt to raise the intel- 
 lectual status of the people ; and so little encouragement was 
 given that no one could afford to keep school. The conse- 
 quence was that the boys and girls grew up with little more 
 education than their own sense of necessity taught them to 
 acquire for themselves, and it was not until very, recently that 
 any suitable efforts were made to supply trained teachers and 
 to open schools in which a thorough education could be afforded. 
 
 I have already mentioned the sermons in the Tabernacle, 
 and observed how little calculated they were to elevate the 
 character or cultivate the minds of the people. I have before 
 me as I write a choice morsel extracted from one of the 
 sermons of Heber C. Kimball, which I think I must give for 
 the reader's benefit. 
 24 
 
388 AN apostle's VIEWS OF "EDICATED MEN !" 
 
 Fancy an '^Apostle!" thus addressing a large and mixed 
 congregation of men, women, and children : 
 
 " Here are some edicated men jest under my nose. Tliey come here and fhey 
 think they know more than I do, and then they git the big head, and it swells 
 and swells until it gits like the old woman's squash— you go tio touch it and it 
 goes ker-smash ; and when you look for the man, why he aint thar. They're 
 jest like so many pots in a furnace — yer know I've been a potter in my time — 
 almighty thin and almighty big ; and when they're sot up the heat makes 'em 
 smoke a little, and then they collapse and tumble in, and they aint no whar." 
 
 This was Heber's style in general. Next to making modest 
 people blush, nothing pleased him better than to annoy or 
 ridicule any one who had the smallest pretensions to educa- 
 tion ; and yet naturally Heber was a kind-hearted man. 
 Brigham's style is very little better, and the substance of his 
 discourses quite as bad. I will give a very favorable specimen 
 taken from a sermon on Polygamy, delivered some years ago, 
 touched up and corrected, and published in the official organ, 
 the Deseret News: 
 
 "Men will say — 'My wife though a most excellent woman has not seen a 
 happy day since I took my second wife.' ' No, not a happy day for a year, says 
 one ; and another has not seen a happy day for five years. 
 
 " I am going to set every woman at liberty, and say to them, Now go your 
 way — ^my women with the rest ; go your way. , And my wives have got to do one 
 of two things ; either round up their shoulders to endure the afflictions of this 
 world and live their religion, or they must leave ; for I will not have them about 
 me. I will go into heaven alone rather than have them scratching and fighting 
 around me. I will set all at liberty. ' What, first wife too 1 ' Yes, I will 
 liberate you all. I know there is no cessation to the everlasting whinings of 
 many of the women in this territory ; I am satisfied that this is the case ; and if 
 the women will turn from the commandments of God, and continue to despise 
 the Order of Heaven, I will pray that the curse of the Almighty may be close, to 
 their heels and that it may be following them all the day long. And those that 
 enter into it (the celestial order) and are faithful, I will promise them that they 
 shall be queens in heaven and rulers to all eternity. 
 
 " Now if any of you will deny the plurality of wives, and continue to do so, I 
 promise that you will be damned." 
 
 This was sweet language for a Prophet and a Saint to utter, 
 and yet it is not half so coarse or improper as some whole 
 sermons that I have listened to from the lips of Brothei 
 Brigham and the other leaders of the Church. 
 
 The Apostle Orson Pratt is the only one who has dared, it* 
 
BROTHER BRIGHAM's IDEAS OF EDUCATION. 389 
 
 the presence of Brigham, to say that education was a proper 
 thing, and that there were many books which would be of 
 good service to the Saints, if they obtained and studied them. 
 On one occasion, Brigham arose in ire, and said : 
 
 " The Professor has told you that there are many books in the world, and I 
 tell you that there are many people there. He says there is something in all 
 these books ; I say each of those persons has got a name. It would do you just 
 as much good to learn those somebodies' names as it would to read those books. 
 Five minutes revelation would teach me more truth than all this pack of non- 
 sense that I should have packed away in my unlucky brains from books." 
 
 But the Prophet, has changed with the times, and there 
 are now in Utah very good schools, both Mormon and 
 Gentile, but none of them are //r^-schools. Bishop Taylor 
 once said in a public lecture that they were " destructive to 
 the best interests of the community;" — and the Bishop's 
 " lord " in the Lion-House is exactly of the same opinion, for 
 he has repeatedly declared that ''there shall be no •free- 
 schools' within his Saintly 'Kingdom' on earth." Neverthe- 
 less, Brother Brigham and his " Infallible Priesthood " are at 
 last beginning to discover that although the night of igno- 
 rance and superstition may hate the clear dayhght of truth 
 and knowledge, when the great Ruler of All commands the 
 light to come forth, it is not in the power of man, with all his 
 boasting, to forbid the sun to shine upon the dark places of 
 the earth. 
 
 Balls, parties, and the tiieatre provided amusement for the 
 people in Salt Lake City itself ; Ijut in the Settlements there 
 was little else in the shape of recreation than idle gossip or 
 the harangues of the Tabernacle. In the city, of course, this 
 has all been changed of late years, but in the Settlements of 
 Utah there is the same lack of civilisation as there was fifteen 
 or twenty years ago. 
 
 At the time when, we went to Utah, Mormon society was 
 slowly recovering from that terrible marrying mania which 
 had set in during the " Reformation," and a season of divorce 
 was the result. 
 
 The authorities at that time — as I have already observed — 
 had urged every person, without distinction, into Polygamy. 
 
396 • A DIVORCE FOR TEN DOLLARS ! 
 
 Men and women had been forced to marty one another with- 
 out any respect to affection or fitness, and the result was 
 that hundreds of marriages were entered into which made 
 those who contracted them miserable for life, but the conse- 
 quences of which they could not avoid. At the same time 
 not a few were divorced almost immediately after they were 
 married, and these things were a matter of daily occurrence. 
 Brigham Young, with his eye perpetually on the dollar, find- 
 ing that his marrying scheme^ like many other of his " divine" 
 plans, was a failure, saw at once that quite a nice little sum 
 might be realised by charging a fee for divorces. Nothing' 
 was charged for marrying; but if the people insisted on 
 having divorces— why, the best, and certainly the most profit- 
 able, thing was to make them pay for them. When we first 
 went to Utah, the Prophet was doing quite a flourishing 
 business in that line. Any one could get a divorce for ten 
 dollars ; and Brigham publicly in the Tabernacle jested about 
 it and said that the money thus obtained came in very con- 
 veniently as pin-money for his wives — though I doubt if they 
 ever received a dollar of it. He added, that so far as " eter- 
 nity " was concerned, these divorces were not worth the paper 
 they were written on, — the people had married for eternity, 
 and in eternity they would have to live together, whether they 
 liked it or not. He says the same to-day ; but still he sells 
 his divorces and gathers in the ten dollars. 
 
 All this is an anomaly, although the people do not appear 
 to see it. While, more than any other community, they 
 profess to regard marriage as a sacred institution, they marry 
 and are divorced in a more careless fashion than the people 
 of any civilised country. I could mention instances which 
 would be really ludicrous were they not so shocking. 
 
 I know a young woman in Salt Lake City, who is not over 
 .twenty-one years of age. She is a very pretty girl and has 
 engaged quite extensively in the divorce business, for she now 
 lives with her fourth husband. She was in my employment 
 after she left her third," and I had an opportunity of studying 
 her character. I noticed that she was frequently visited by a 
 
A YOUNG lady's FOUR HUSBANDS, 391 
 
 certain young man who seenaed to make himself very agree- 
 able to her, and feeling a great deal of interest in her — for 
 she had left her father and mother in England, when a mere 
 child, in order to gather to Zion under the paternal care of 
 one of the Elders — I asked her why the young man cajne so 
 often to see her. , 
 
 " He is my intended husband/' she replied. 
 
 "Why," I said, quite astonished, "you have only just been 
 separated from your last husband, and after so much ill-treat- 
 ment I should have thought you would have been afraid of 
 trying another — at-any-rate, so soon as this." 
 
 "You're wrong there," she replied, in quite a serious, earnest 
 way, " I am determined to marry until I get the right one, even 
 if I have to do so a dozen times. Don't you think I am 
 right ?" This really seemed so shocking that I did not know 
 what to say. 
 
 The most absurd point in all this was, that of her three 
 former husbands, one was a Gentile, and two were Mormons. 
 The Gentile, of course, would have no chance in the world to 
 come, but to each of the two Mormons she was sealed for 
 eternity. Now if Brigham's divorces are of no force in the 
 next world, and if his marriages are binding, what will this 
 young woman do between her two Mormon husbands — to say 
 nothing of the two other Gentile ones, who "do not count!" — 
 for the Mormons, though they are so generous to themselves 
 in the matter of wives, will not allow a woman to have a couple 
 of husbands, either here or in eternity. 
 
 What nonsense is all this : what blasphemy to ascribe it to 
 "the Lord!" How different I found the Mormon "lord" from 
 that great and glorious Being — source of all goodness, holi- 
 ness, and truth — to whom in the days of my childhood I had 
 looked up aiid adored I The "lord" of whom they so flip- 
 pantly spoke, was not the same with Him to whom things in 
 heaven and earth do bow, by whom, and in whom, are all things. 
 He never blighted the heart of woman, or cursed her with a 
 perpetual curse ; but to Him, since I escaped from the cruel 
 thraldom which once blighted my existence, day by day my 
 
392 THE "lord" of WHOM THET SPEAK. 
 
 soul goes out in love and gratitude. Would that I could infuse 
 into the worn and weary hearts of the women of Utah the 
 knowledge, that God has given freely to all His creatures^— to 
 woman as well as man — no cruel laW to torture their souls, 
 no wretched "Revelation" to embitter their lives, but a Gospel 
 of peace, and gentleness, and love, which makes perfect those 
 who walk therein. 
 
CHAPTER XXVIII. 
 
 WHAT WOMEN SUFFER IN POLYGAMY:— THE STORY OF 
 MARY BURTON. 
 
 A Surprise— Meeting an Old Friend — The Traces of Grief-— Mary in TrouMe— 
 Sympathy — " There is No Help ! " — Painful Memories — The Remembrance 
 of a Dead Love— "He Used to Almost Worship You"— "It Changed Him 
 Altogether " — " How can we Help Ourselves ?"— Living up to His Privileges — 
 The Time for Beginning Polygamy — That Protni^e ! — A Wife's Prayers Re- 
 fused—The System a Fearful Curse— Dangerous to Talk!— "Is the Child 
 bead ? "—His Whole Nature Altered— Mary's Little Girl— Frantic with Sor- 
 row—** Not Much to make Them Happy " — A Miserable Resouree — ^A Sad 
 Story of Wifely Sorrow — How Elder Shrevusbury Kept His Promise to His 
 Wife — " She Shall Believe "-^Marrying two Sisters on tiie same Day — Mem> 
 ories of Other Days. 
 
 ONE bright summer morning, about six months after our 
 arrival in Salt Lake City, I was sitting in the work-room 
 busy with my girls, when a light tap was heard at the door, 
 and the next instant a lady entered, and coming straight up to 
 me was about to kiss me. 
 
 I started back a step, held out my hand, looked her full in 
 the face, and in a moment we were in each other's arms. It 
 was my old friend Mary Burton ! 
 
 I could with difficulty find words to express my astonish- 
 ment when I recognised her, so greatly was she changed in 
 every respect. From the very first, whenever we met after a 
 long separation, I had noticed a more than ordinary alteratioii 
 
394 THE UNEXPECTED VISIT. 
 
 in her appearance. But it must be remembered that at the 
 time of our first reiinion she had grown out of childhood into 
 womanhood; when I met her again in New York she had 
 passed through the most interesting phase of a woman's life, — 
 she had forsaken maidenhood for matrimony, — and now I met 
 her once more after she had endured those horrors on the 
 Plains, — of which the reader has already heard, — and she 
 had entered into a life of sorrow worse than any she had 
 known before. No wonder then, that now, as upon pre- 
 vious occasions, I noticed quite a startling change in her 
 appearance. Her dress was of the coarsest and plainest 
 kind, but neat, as was everything she touched, — yet not so 
 carefully arranged as in the old time in England. She used 
 formerly to have a way of adjusting a dress or a bonnet so 
 that it set her off ten times better -than it would a girl who 
 had not naturally the same taste ; but now, although, as I said; 
 her clothes, if coarse, were neat, she evidently had not taken 
 any pains to set herself off to the best advantage; and in. a 
 woman what a story did that simple fact tell ! But it was in 
 her features and manner that the change was most remarli;a- 
 ble. In looking at her face you would have been puzzled fo 
 say in what the alteration consisted. Her cheeks were thin- 
 ner and sadly pale, but that was not the cause of her appearing 
 as she did. Had she been older, I verily believe the anguish 
 she had passed through would have blanched her hair and left 
 upon hei" brow deep marks of , thought and suffering. As it 
 was, however, though no one feature in particular was very 
 greatly altered, the whole expression of her face was that of 
 one whose heart was utterly crushed and broken ; and when 
 her eyes met mine, I could hardly refrain from tears as I saw 
 the mournful look of subdued pain, which told in them the 
 terrible conflict which her heart had endured. 
 
 1 took her to my own room — poor girl, how my heart bled 
 for her! — and again and again I held her in my arms and 
 tried to comfort her, for she was very weary; and at last she 
 wept. I was glad to see that passionate flood of tears, for I 
 knew it would relieve her, and in that I was not mistaken; 
 
THE STORY OF MARY BURTON. 395 
 
 She threw her arms round my neck, and kissing me repeatedly, 
 sobbed out: "Don't blame me, Sister Stenhouse, don't blame 
 me very much, I cannot help it," 
 
 "There, there, Mary," I said, "be calm and you will soon be 
 better. You must tell me all your troubles, and I will do all I 
 "can to help and comfort you." 
 
 "There is no help, Sister Stenhouse, no comfort for me — 
 I'm past all that," she answered. 
 
 "Don't say that, Mary," I said, "I know that you have passed 
 through a terrible amount of suffering, and have had much to 
 trouble you in every way ; but your husband is still alive, is he 
 not? — and there may be many years of happiness before 
 you." 
 
 "It is the thought of him that makes me so wretched," she 
 said, "oh, I could have borne death a thousand times rather 
 than this. I would gladly have seen him die rather than see 
 him changed as he is now. You do not know, Sister Sten- 
 house, how my whole soul was wrapped up in that man, how I 
 almost worshipped him. When we suffered so much together 
 on the Plains, I felt happy in comparison with what I feel now. 
 I remember that terrible night when I believed he was dying, 
 — I. remember the anguish that I felt; but, oh, I knew then 
 that he loved me and that his heart was all my own. Had I 
 lost him — if I could myself have lived — I should have felt 
 that he had never loved another beside me; I should have 
 known that we would meet together again in heaven and be 
 happy in each other's love. After all we went through 
 together, I loved him more and more ; we seemed to live with 
 one life ; we had the same thoughts, and hopes, and pleasures. 
 I leaned upon him, and I loved him — Ah, so fondly! — and, 
 Sister Stenhouse, I know he loved me then. We were getting 
 over the effects of our sufferings on the Plains, and I was 
 gaining strength and was looking forward to the time when 
 my child should be born. It was then that they came and 
 taught him that devils' doctrine and led him away from me. — 
 Oh dear ! I cannot bear it, Sister Stenhouse, I cannot bear it- 
 it will drive me mad!" 
 
Sg6 ELDER SHREWSBXJftt's BRG«£N PROMISE. 
 
 She buried her face in hef hands and sobbed again. 
 
 "Mary dear," I said, "Don't talk like that — he cannot have 
 ceased to love you, I am sure ; he used to almost worship you, 
 dear." 
 
 " It is because I know that he did ohbe, that drives me crazy. 
 You do not know what I feel, what I have to bear!" 
 
 I did not utter a word — my own Sorrows were hidden in 
 my own heart — The heart knoweth its bitterness, and a 
 Stranger intermeddleth not in the matter. "You have been 
 through the Endowments.'" she as/ked. "So have I. We 
 went through. Sister Stenhouse, about three months after we 
 came to Utah, and never since then have I known a moment's 
 peace. I do not know what they said to my husband, but 
 whatever it was, it produced a great eifect upon his mind, and 
 changed him altogether — he has been an altered man from 
 that very time. I have no doubt that they told him that it was 
 his duty to take anothet wife, and they would say that- no 
 promise made to me before our marriage is binding if it comes 
 in opposition to our religion. You know how devoted he is, 
 how firm his faith is. Why, I do believe that he would obey 
 Counsel even if it btoke his heart and cost him his lifcv 
 Did they say anything to ydu or fmr husband, dear?" 
 
 "Certainly they did, Mary-^-'We have heard it daily and 
 hourly, and my husband is constantly being counselled aboat 
 ft. I am wretched, Mary, you know I must be ; I feel just a$ 
 ydu do, but how can we help ourselves?" 
 
 "No, we cannot help ourselves— there is no hope;" sh<» 
 said; "but it is a cruel wrong. You know well enough how 
 determined I was never to marry a man who \v*ould take 
 another wife. When I thought that Elder Shrewsbury mi^t 
 be influenced by his religion, I made him go to the Apostle 
 and get counsel, and then he solemnjy vowed to me that he 
 «^w;- would enter into Polygamy without my consent — which, 
 of course, was the same as saying that he never would do so at all. 
 Until wre went through our Endowments, he never even hinted 
 at such a thing. But they spoke to him then ; and one day 
 after he had been having a long consultation with the Bishof^ 
 
GETTING USED TO IT. 3g7 
 
 he came and spoke to me. He was not unkind in the least. 
 In fact he seemed to be as ttiudh pained at all mention of the 
 subject as I was. He said that the Bishop had been urging 
 him to live up to his privileges, and had explained to him liow 
 great a loss in the celestial "vmrld it would be, both to him and 
 to me, if he did not take more wives. He was told that now 
 while he was young was the time, and that I would soon get 
 over any pain that I might suffer. Yes, they actually said so. 
 Fancy tearing out the very affections of one's heart and blast- 
 ihg every hope and, happiness in life, and then saying that 1 
 should soon "get used to it!" I tell you, Sister Stenhouse, a 
 true woman never can "get used" to this hideous system. If 
 the hearts of some are dead and cold, it is a curse to them and 
 a curse to their husbands and their children ; and if a wife 
 seems careless or callous, as the case may be, it is because love 
 for her husband has first died out in her heart. She feels no 
 jealousy because she has no love ; but if a woman has but a 
 spark of love for her husband she will hate with a deadly 
 hatred any other woman whom that husband loves." 
 
 "But what did Elder Shrewsbury say when they told him to 
 enter into Polygamy.?" I enquired. 
 
 "At first he told them it was utterly impossible," she replied, 
 "and he mentioned his promise to me, and said we were very 
 happy together, and that he wished for nothing more. But 
 they knew his weakness and that he would do anything for his 
 religion, and th^ urged him on that point. It was even a sin 
 against me they said, for if he had no more than one wife he 
 could never exalt me in the Celestial Kingdom, — that I ought 
 to be treated like a child — a very dear, but spoilt child, -^ and 
 if I refused what was for my own and my husband's benefit and 
 everlasting welfare, he ought to act up to what he knew was 
 right, and leave the consequences with the Lord, who would 
 order all things for the best. My husband told me all this 
 Very sadly at first, but I could see that it had an effect upon 
 his mind. They saw it, too, and did not let the subject drop. 
 Every day they spoke to him otf it, and at last he gave way — 
 for my sake, he said! This was the cruellest wrong of all. 
 
398 MARRYING A GIRL OF FOURTEEN. 
 
 Then one day he told me very firmly and very coldly, as if he 
 had steeled his heart to do so, that he had made up his mind 
 to take another wife." 
 
 "What!" I exclaimed, "After the solemn oath he swore 
 never to do such a thing ? Why, I could not have believed it 
 of Elder Shrewsbury!" 
 
 " I reminded him of his promise," she said, "but he told me 
 that the Revelation justified him in breaking it ; that it said 
 in the second clause that ' All covenants, contracts, and oaths 
 not sealed by him who is appointed on earth to hold this power 
 in the last days are of no force after the resurrection' ; that 
 for this cause we had been married again for eternity, and 
 that now he was free from his oath. I knelt down before him, 
 and I wept and prayed as if for life itself — I entreated him, if 
 no more, to wait and put off all thoughts of another marriage 
 for a few months, until he had time to consider the matter 
 carefully. He had already thoroughly thought it over, he said, 
 and could not go back now, for the Bishop had chosen a wife 
 for him and had arranged everything. He even told me who it 
 was — a young girl named Wilbur, about fourteen years of age: — 
 a mere child. I prayed him if he would be so wicked as to. per- 
 jure himself and wrong me so foully, at least not to add to his 
 sin by injuring a poor innocent child. He was very indignant 
 writh me for that, said that he was doing the child the greatest- 
 good he possibly could by marrying her ; that he was ensuring 
 her salvation as well as mine ; and that he expected to receive 
 the blessing of God." 
 
 "Mary," I said, " this system is a fearful. curse." 
 " Curse!" she exclaimed, "Curse is a heavenly word to apply 
 to such a system. Why there is nothing in hell so hateful, so 
 vile, so detestable. It is blight and ruin to everything that is 
 fair and good — I never pass a day but I curse with the bitter- 
 est hatred the men who devised it. Women can hate bitterly 
 when they choose ; but I hate them more than ever woman 
 hated before." 
 
 " Hush! Hush, dear," I said, ".You mustn't talk so, Mary! " 
 "I mustn't ifllk it perhaps-rit's dangerous, I know ; — but I 
 
ALL lostI^ jgg, 
 
 may think it. There is not a true-hearted woman in Utah 
 who does not feel as I do this day. Do you think that when 
 they have ruined all our hopes for time and for eternity we 
 shall love them still .' Here, but for this wretched system, I 
 should have been a happy wife and mother, and now see what 
 I am — husband, child, all lost — all lost ! " 
 
 " Is the child dead, Mary ? " I asked, very gently, for I feared 
 to pain her. 
 
 "Yes dear," she replied, "in fact I believe it never lived — 
 the one I was thinking of. I was ill, very ill indeed, after what my 
 husband had told me. They thought I should die, and I think 
 he was sorry, for he became very kind and tender to me, but 
 that only made me feel worse. Then my child was born, but 
 I never saw it, for I was unconscious for more than a week 
 after, and then they told me that it was not alive, but my hus- 
 band would never speak to me' about it. As I grew better, 
 his cold, stern manner returned, and then at last he married 
 that girl Wilbur, and since then he has married two more, for 
 he is doing very well in business. I think that all his love for 
 me has gone. At first he thought of marrying again because 
 it was a religious principle ; and as it was the time of the Re- 
 formation he did not dare to refuse ; but now his heart is 
 grown hard and cold. You see a change in me. Sister Sten- 
 house, but I think you'd see a greater change in him. I know, 
 of course, that I used to look at him with the eyes of love, and 
 of course did not see him as other people did ; but that is not 
 the only change — it isn't in his face alone ; his whole nature 
 seems altered. It quite pains me sometimes to see it." 
 
 " Do you feel any happier now — any calmer, Mary.'" 
 
 " Yes," she said, "Yes, and no. I do not love him as I used 
 to — how could I } But when I look into my heart I find, if I 
 tell you the truth, that a little love does remain there. If only 
 I could quite cease to love him I think I should be happy ; but 
 when I pet and play with my little girl — for we have had one 
 child since that dreadful time — some of my love for him comes 
 back again, and I sit down and have a good cry. Sometimes 
 that isn't enough to calm me and I shut the door and walk up 
 
400 A WIIfElS PESEAIR. 
 
 and down the room and swear ;-— there, don't look so homfied, 
 Sister Stenhouse ! I cannot help it ; if I did not give way to 
 my feelings now and then I should die outright ; — and some- 
 times I break a few things, — but he never knows it, and it 
 does me good. We came into the city yesterdayon a visit, 
 and we shall stay for a few days. He brought me, I believe, 
 as a matter of form ; but I found out where you lived, and I 
 came to see you. You never answered my letter and I did 
 not know whether you had left New York yet. I really am 
 glad to see you. Sister Stenhouse. And it is true that Brother 
 Stenhouse has not taken another wife yet.'" 
 
 " Not yet," I said, " But, as I told you, he has been spoken 
 to about it, and I cannot tell what he may do. As you say, 
 Idary, the Mormon women have not much to make then* 
 happy." 
 
 I took her in then to get some refreshments, and I asked her 
 to stay for the day. She said that she had a message which 
 some one had left for Elder Shrewsbury ; that she would go 
 and leave it, as it was of some importance, and that she would 
 come back again. 
 
 In about an hour she returned, and somehow, although I had 
 intended to talk of quite another subject, we got back to our 
 common grievance again. I do not wonder at this for it was 
 the perpetual theme of all our thoughts. Queen Mary, of un* 
 pleasant memory, is said to have fretted over the loss of the 
 town of Calais until she believed that after her death that 
 name would be found written upon her heart ; and I really do 
 think, were such a thing possible, the word ' Polygamy' would 
 be found indelibly engraved upon the heart of many a wretched 
 wife in Utah. 
 
 Mary gave me a great deal of information. In that she was 
 quite herself, as I knew her in by-gone days. Nothing escaped 
 her observation. She sat down with me and told me all her 
 troubles and I need hardly say how deeply I sympathised with 
 her; So I tried to comfort her, and spoke about her child, but 
 even respecting that poor little thing she felt no hope. "Why 
 wheo it grows up, she said, it will be as miserable as I am— I 
 
THAT BROKEN VOW. 4OI 
 
 can see no prospect of happiness in the future for it." W© 
 agreed that the only way whereby we might prevent our chil- 
 dren from experiencing sorrow and misery similar to our. own, 
 was to teach them from the very first that Polygamy was the 
 natural and proper, as well as the revealed, order of marriage — 
 ih fact to " bring them up" in the system. What a miserable 
 resource was this for a mother who loved her children ! 
 
 " One thing, Mary," I said, referring to her own personal ex- 
 perience in Polygamy — " one thing I do not quite understand. 
 You, of course, had made your husband specially promise be- 
 fore you married ffim that he would never take another wife, 
 and he was therefore bound, as a man, by every moral obliga- 
 tion, not to do so. But other women have not been situated 
 as you were, and they have exacted no promises from their 
 husbands. Yet it always seemed to me that your doing so 
 was quite superfluous, for you must be aware, Mary, that the 
 Revelation says that before a man can take a second wife he 
 must have the full consent of the first. The Elders in Europe 
 used to make a great deal of that point, as you may remem- 
 ber, for they said that this provision took from the Revelation 
 any harshness or injustice which it might otherwise appear to 
 show. I know many women who submitted on this ac- 
 count, for they argued that if their permission was necessary, 
 they could always, by refusing, save themselves from any 
 further trouble. Now if that was so, how came jyour husband 
 to take another wife against your will? I say ^^wr husband, 
 because! should have no difficulty in many other cases. I 
 have been repeatedly told that husbands never troubled them^ 
 selves about the Revelation when they wanted another wife, 
 unless it was to silence the first wife with it, if she rebelled 
 But I always regarded Elder Shrewsbury as a conscientious 
 man, and I firmly believed that he would never willingly give 
 you a moment's pain. When he made that promise to you, he 
 had the Revelation before him, and had also the Apostle to go 
 to if he needed the ' Word of the Lord.' He was theretore 
 bound by that promise, notwithstanding anything that the 
 Revelation might say to the contrary ; and even had he made 
 
402 "I.WILL DESTROY HER. 
 
 no promise, the Revelation was on your side. We are told 
 that every woman must first give her consent." 
 
 " That is all very true, Sister Stenhouse," she said, " to a 
 certain extent. The theory is as you say, but you have not 
 heard the whole. I know the Revelation pretty nearly by 
 heart and so I can tell you exactly what it does say. The first 
 wife is said to hold the keys of this power, by which is meant 
 ■that she can refuse. But then it goes on to say that when her 
 husband has taught her the law of the Priesthood — that is 
 Polygamy — " she sliall believe or she shall be destroyed, saith 
 the Lord your God, for I will destroy her." You see there is 
 no loophole of escape for the woman. Her husband is to teach 
 her the law and she shall believe ; and if she does not — and 
 of course people have no power to make , themselves believe 
 what they please — she is to be destroyed, and God will destroy 
 her! Do you know, Sister Stenhouse, there are stories 
 whispered here of women who did refuse and who stood in 
 their husband's way, and it is said that the Priesthood did not 
 wait for the Lord to destroy,. but carried out the law them- 
 selves. 
 
 " My dear Mary, we really must not talk in this way," I 
 said — " it's quite wicked. My husband would never forgive 
 me if he knew what we have been talking about. He says 
 that all these stories are untrue, and that they are all exaggerr 
 ations or fabrications of the Apostates who wish to bring 
 scandal on our religion." 
 
 " I do not wish to shake your faith. Sister Stenhouse, but 
 my own is pretty well gon'e," she replied. " Of course I 
 never speak to my husband about these things, nor do I 
 dare to talk to any one else ; but I feel it quite a relief to see 
 you and to be able to say what I think, for I know I can 
 confide in you. But we have wandered sadly from your 
 question. You were talking about the first wife giving her 
 consent .'" 
 
 "Yes," I said, "and you were about to tell me whether 
 it was really and practically necessary in every instance. 
 You have been here longer and have seen more than I have." 
 
THE FOUR WHO GIVE GONSENt. '' '40^ 
 
 "The wife's donsent is by no means necessary, Sistei- 
 Stenhouse. It may be asked sometimes as a mere matter 
 of form, and, of course, in the Endomnnent House, when she 
 gives the other wives to her husband, she may be said to 
 give her consent to his marrying them. It is ftothing but a 
 piece of folly to talk about women having the power to with- 
 hold thdr consent, and it is simply an insult and a mock- 
 ery for their husbands to ask it ; they well know before they 
 ask that their wives dare not refuse to give it. But it enables 
 them to boast to the Gentiles that they do not take othet 
 wives until their first wife gave her consent. This is what is 
 meant by ' the liberty of the Gospel,' I suppose, about which 
 Brothet Brigham talks so much. But every one knows per- 
 fectly well that this is all a farce, and that he would take 
 other wives all the same however stoutly the first wife might re- 
 fuse. She would only make herself miserable, even if she got 
 off as well as that. The idea really is that in Polygamy there are 
 four who must give their consent : Brigham Young must first 
 receive a revelatioii from the Lord stating that he approves of 
 the proposed maxriage. Then the first wife's permission 
 must be obtained. Then the consent of her parents. And, 
 last of all, the girl herself is to be asked. 
 
 " This all sounds very fair," she continued, " but in prac- 
 tice it -is quite otherwise. Without Presideht Young's coto- 
 ,sent there can be no marriage at all ; but if it is the will of 
 Brigham, the refusal of the first wife and the parents and 
 the girl herself do not for a moment signify." 
 '^But did your husband, Mary, act in this way?" 
 " Well, not quite. He told me that if I refused it would 
 make not |hp slightest difference ; and as I believed him, I, 
 of course, went, and did not make a scene. It would have 
 only made matters worse. Some of the older sisters came 
 round and talked me over, and explained and insisted, and 
 ''labored" with me as they called it, until I hardly knew 
 what to think or do-n-my mind was quite unsettled. Eliza 
 R. Snow is quite great at that sort of work. When n^ 
 husband took his other two wives, he did not consult me at 
 25 
 
404 "laboring" with refractory wives. 
 
 all, but simply told me that on a certain day I must go with 
 him to the Endowment House. We went, and he married 
 two sisters on the same day, but it did not do him much 
 good. They are handsome girls, but have very bad tempers 
 and we often have a very unpleasant time. The second wife, 
 poor child, suffered most when he married the other two. She 
 did not seem to like me very much at first, which was quite 
 natural, but when the other two were brought home she 
 seemed quite to cling to me, and I have, strange to say, taken 
 quite a fancy to her. In all our disputes she always sides with 
 me, and in return I always stand up for her, as a matter of 
 course. I am getting used to this wretched life ; I have stifled 
 all my love ; and I am sorry to say that sometimes I almost 
 hate every one around me, including my husband. Now and 
 then the old longing for some one to love, for some one to 
 confide in, comes over me. I felt like that this morning when 
 I came here, and that is what made me act so badly." 
 
 " Say nothing of that, Mary ;" I replied. " I wish you would 
 stay with me while you are in the City." 
 
 " No," she said, " We shall be here for a day or two, but I 
 do not think my husband would like me to stay here 
 altogether. He knows that you are aware of his attachment 
 to me once and his promises in the old times, and very likely 
 he would be a little ashamed to meet you. He'll make 
 business an excuse, and in fact he is busy all the day. So 
 I'll come round alone as much as I can, and we'll have a good 
 talk again." 
 
 I saw her to the door, and then she turned and said, " I'll 
 come again and see you. Sister Stenhouse, before we leave 
 the city. I know you think me very wicked ; but, there ; 
 don't be shocked, dear ! — I'm not so very bad, after all." 
 
 Thus saying, she kissed me, laughed with the ghost of her 
 former merry ways when first I knew her; and said good-night. 
 I watched her till she was lost in the darkness, and then I 
 closed the door, saying to myself, with a sigh, " Ah me ! can 
 this be the Mary that once I knew ?" 
 
CHAPTER XXIX. 
 
 HOW MARRIAGES ARE MADE IN UTAH— A NEW WIFE FOUND 
 FOR MY HUSBAND. 
 
 My Old Friend Madame Baliff — Painful Reverses of Fortune — Shameful 
 "Counsel" during the "Reformation" — A Choice of Two Evils — Reminis- 
 cences of a Happier Life — A Message from Brigham Young — A Serious Trust 
 — An Interesting Case — Suffering for the Faith — My Talkative Friend Again 
 — I Receive Strange Congratulations — ^An Inquisitive Lady — A Lady who 
 Could " Build-Up " a Rebellious Wife— The Apostle Heber C. Kimball Pays 
 Me a Special Visit—" Plenty of Wives Around the Town " — A Morning drive 
 with the " Model Saint " — A Lesson on Children's Dresses — Good " Coun- 
 sel " Thrown- Away — Heber Suggests a Wife for my Husband — How Love 
 is Developed in Mormon Wives^" The Finest Thing in the World " — The 
 Shadow of Coming Evil. 
 
 NOT long after this, I was enabled to visit my Swiss 
 friend, Madame Baliff. Ever since her husband had 
 called upon me in Salt Lake City, I had watched anxiously 
 for an opportunity of seeing her, for I felt much interested in 
 learning how time had passed with her since we parted in 
 Geneva. 
 
 I found, her in a little log-cabin of two rooms, with bare 
 walls, bare floor, and miserably furnished ; and in this 
 wretched abode Poverty and Polygamy had wrecked the life 
 of my poor friend, whom I had known under such different 
 circumstances. Here, together with their five children, lived 
 also the second wife, with her two children. It was with diffi- 
 
406 A CONTRAST, 
 
 culty that I could recognise in the poor, careworn, broken- 
 spirited, and ill-clad woman who stood before me, the once 
 gay, light-hearted, happy, and elegantly-dressed lady whom I 
 had known in Switzerland. MormOnism had in her case 
 utterly blighted her existence. It seemed to me hardly pos- 
 sible that so great a change should have been wrought in her 
 in such a few years as had elapsed since last I saw her. What 
 suffering she must have endured, I thought, what mental 
 agony, what physical pain, to write those wrinkled lines of care 
 upon her once handsome face ; and. Ah ! what a pang I felt at 
 the remembrance that I myself had beeft instrumental in lead- 
 ing her into Mormonism and Polygamy. Self-reproach I did 
 not feel, but sorrow I did. I had thought to lead her into th© 
 way of holiness and. heavenly peace by winning her to the 
 religion of the Saints, but that which I in my enthusiasm had 
 believed would be the greateJst blessing which one poor mortal 
 could communicate to another, had turned to a curse, and 
 instead of the happy wife and mother which she once had beeh, 
 she had become a victim to that faith which in its very exist- 
 ence is an insult to womanhood. 
 
 In temper and disposition she was, however, just the same ; 
 her affectionate nature was, unchanged. No doubt she read 
 in my features the painful surprise which I experienced in 
 witnessing her altered circumstances ; but she met me with not 
 a single, word of reproach for my being the cause of her leav- 
 ing her own dedr country. I should not have blamed her had 
 she hated me, though she knew, of course, that I had wronged 
 her innocently. 
 
 She told me of the difficulties which they had had to con- 
 tend with after their arrival in Utah, and how they had been 
 conipelled to part with almost everything they had, in order to 
 provide bread for theii' children. When they left Lofidon, 
 they took with them several handsome carpets, ehina, glass, 
 and a large quantity of silver ware, besides bedding and cloth- 
 ing of every description, for they wfere well-to-do in the world, 
 and had quite enough for themselves, after they had liberally 
 assisted the poorer- Saints to emigrate. Upon their arrival itt 
 
REVERSES OF FORTUNE. 407 
 
 Utah, the husband — good man that he was — was willing to 
 come down to the level of his brethren and to go farmii^ 
 among them. A brother who knew him in his own country, 
 and imagined, I suppose, that he could afford to lose, sold him 
 a farm that he himself had become disgusted with, though, of 
 course, he did not say so, and when my inexperienced friend, 
 Monsieur Baliff, found that nothing could be done with it, he 
 •supposed that the land was good enough but that he himself 
 was not competent to work it. No one ventured to hint that 
 he had been cheated, as it was one of the Church authorities 
 who had sold him the land. After spending upon it all that 
 he possessed, he was finally compelled to abandon it. They 
 were now very much straightened in circumstances, and my 
 poor friend told me that she had frequently been compelled — 
 as they were entirely destitute of money — to take a silver 
 spoon or fork to the butcher's market to trade with, and there 
 they drove a hard bargain with her, and she obtained next to 
 nothing in exchange for her silver. Her crystal and plate 
 now grace the table of a certain rich man in Utah. Every 
 article they possessed went in this way at a most ruinous 
 sacrifice, until nothing remained, and then the husband was. 
 forced to engage in manual labor, while the poor wife employed 
 : herself in whatever feminine work she could obtain ; they re- 
 ceiving in return just what people chose to pay them. In the 
 midst of their troubles the husband was " counselled " to take 
 another wife. 
 
 *' But why did he not refuse to do so .'" I asked. 
 
 " If you had been here during the Reformation you would 
 not ask me such a question as that. Sister Stenhouse,'you 
 ought to thank God that you were not here then. There 
 were shocking things done at that time, and the men were all 
 crazy about marrying. They married every woman who was 
 single, and even little girls who had scarcely reached their 
 teens ; it was a time of terror, and no one dared to rebel." 
 
 She then told mc that her husband had been, as one might 
 say, compelled to marry a young Swiss girl whom they had 
 brought out to Utah with iJiem as a domestic This girl had 
 
408 SOME RATHER COOL " COUNSEL ! " 
 
 been a very faithful servant and Madame BaliflE had become 
 very much attached to her. During the Reformation the 
 Bishop visited them and "counselled" Monsieur Baliff to take 
 a second wife. The girl was also "counselled" to marry, and 
 when she said that she did not know of any one to whom she 
 would like, to be married, the Bishop told her that he himself 
 would find a suitable man. 
 
 " My husband told me what the Bishop had urged him to 
 do," said Madame Baliff, " and we talked the matter over in a 
 practical way. We knew that the girl would be forced to 
 marry somebody, and that then she would have to leave us, 
 which would put us to the very greatest inconvenience, for 
 situated as we were we could hardly get on without her 
 assistance. At the same time, he also would be compelled to 
 obey counsel, and we came to the conclusion that as there was 
 no way of evading the difficulty altogether, it would be better for 
 him to marry the girl than to bring a stranger into the house. 
 So he asked her, and she accepted him, and they were mar- 
 ried. She is a good girl and tries to do her best, but it is a 
 great trial to me, and one which I trust you may never be 
 called upon to bear. My husband is as kind and gentle a 
 man as ever lived, and he has done all he could to keep me 
 from feeling unhappy ; had it been otherwise I dare not think 
 what I should have done — I believe I should have gone mad 
 or died. In our household arrangements, of course it made 
 very little difference, but it was inexpressibly painful to me, 
 and though I suppose I shall remain a Mormon till the day of 
 my death I have learned to hate Mormonism." 
 
 Poor Madame Baliff! Hers was a life of privation and 
 sorrow, of late years. Happy as woman could be in her 
 youthful days, she little dreamed what Providence had in 
 store for her ere her earthly course had run. With a faithful 
 and devoted husband ; with a charming little family growing 
 up around her ; with all that could make life fair and beautiful. 
 But that accursed thing — Polygamy — came and poisoned all 
 her happiness, and blighted all her hopes ; and when, but a 
 few months ago, worn out and weary of life, she left behind 
 
THE LAST OF My PO0R SWISS FRIEND. 4O9 
 
 her all her sorrows and all her misery, I could not weep that 
 she had gone to a better land beyond the veil, but I thanked 
 God that at last, poor soul, her days of trial were for ever over 
 and she had entered into her eternal rest. 
 
 One day Brother Brigham sent me word that he wished to 
 see me. 
 
 I went to him, and he told me that he wanted me to become 
 acquainted with a certain young girl in whom he took a great 
 interest. She was the daughter, by his first wife, of Jedediah 
 M. Grant, the famous Apostle of the " Reformation " — her 
 name was Carrie, and she was now an orphan. Brother 
 Brigham wished me to have her with me every day, for she 
 was not "feeling well," he said, and he thought I might do her 
 some good. This " not feeling well " I afterwards discovered 
 meant that she was almost ready to apostatize. If she desired 
 it, I was to teach her my business ; not that she needed to 
 follow any profession, for, as President Young explained, she 
 had a good home ; but her mind needed occupation, and he 
 did not care how she employed her time, so long as she was 
 with me every day and could be made to " feel well." 
 
 I listened to all that Brother Brigham said, and accepted 
 the trust in good faith — not only to please him, but because 
 the girl was an orphan, and my heart went out towards her 
 even before I had seen her. 
 
 Before I returned home, I called at the house where Carrie 
 was stopping, and arranged that she should come every day to 
 see me, under pretext of learning the business. Now it so 
 happened that we each conceived a liking to the other the 
 very first moment we met ; we made friends together at 
 once, and she wanted to begin coming to me the very next 
 day. She was a sweet-looking and intelligent girl, fair but 
 fragile, -and with a peculiar expression of melancholy sadness 
 dwelling upon her features, which gave her a painfully inter- 
 esting appearance. I never, befpre or since, met with a young 
 girl who habitually looked so unhappy ; and I thought that 
 perhaps physical weakness might be the cause, for it was 
 
419 "CARRIE. 
 
 evident that iil constitution ^e was extremely delicate — I 
 almost feared consumptive. 
 
 The first day we spent together she told me that her 
 parents had been among the pioneers to Utah, that her only 
 sister had died on the Plains, and that she had lost her mother 
 66on after they had arrived in Salt Lake City. As the only 
 remaining child of her mother, she had been a great pet with 
 her father, but he too had died about four years f)revious to 
 the time of which I speak, and she had never been happy 
 since. " I often long to die," she said, "that I might join my 
 mother and father ; no one loves me here, and I have nothing 
 to live for." Her father had married four wives after her 
 mother's death, and they were all very kind to her, but she 
 did not feel that she had a home. She told me, that about 
 six months before she came to me, she had started to go east, 
 to her mother's friends, for they had frequently written to her 
 urging her to come to them, and that when she was about 
 two weeks' journey from Salt Lake City, Brigham Young 
 sent after her, and she was brought back. " But," she said, 
 "I shall never be happy here, Sister Stenhouse, I know I 
 never shall ; and why should they not let me leave and go to 
 my relatives ? " 
 
 I knew Very well that it was of no use for her to try to get 
 away, for we had no railroad then, and escape was almost 
 impossible. I therefore tried to make her more cheerful, and 
 told her that a girl as ybung as she was — for she was scarcely 
 seventeen — .had much to live for. But her unhappiness had 
 become almost a settled melancholy and she seemed to be 
 interested in nothing. Besides which, the task I attempted 
 was all the more difficult as I was not at all happy myself. . 
 
 One day the conversation happened to turn upon Polygamy, 
 and in a moment I saw that all her trouble arose from that 
 miserable doctrine, and from that alone. We had not ex- 
 changed many words upon the subject when she exclaimed : 
 " Oh, how I hate Polygamy ! God forgive me ; but I cannot 
 help it, Sistfer Stenhouse ! I do hate it ; and yet I believe 
 that it is, true." . Poor child !^. I. understood her too well, for 
 
BRIGHAM young's PROTEOB^'. 4II 
 
 her position was exactly mine ;— f rem that moment we were 
 fast friends. 
 
 Here was the child of one of the greatest fanatics that 
 Mormonism has ever known, one of the wildest advocates of 
 the " Celestial Order of Marriage/' perfectly loathing the sys- 
 tem ; and yet, poor girl, believing it firmly, and believing too 
 tliat she could not obtain salvation unless she entered into 
 it. How I pitied and loved that poor girl! — and yet what 
 strength or consolation could I offer her, being myself as 
 painfully situated as 'she was. Our mutual sorrow united us 
 still more closely in loving companionship. I had rarely met 
 among the Mormon girls with one so thoughtful and observ- 
 ing, so kind and gentle. She had not been with me many 
 weeks before she had entwined herself so completely round 
 my heart that I was lonely when she stayed away and I tried 
 to keep her with me altogether. I tried in every way to 
 make her feel at home when at my house ; and noticing her 
 delicate health, and thinking that she did not always get those 
 little things to tempt her appetite which an invalid should 
 always have, I found out many trifles which I believed would 
 please her, and always tried to get them for her. She seemed 
 to think much of these little attentions, and I have always 
 believed that she loved me very dearly. 
 
 Some of my neighbors began to whisper pretty plainly to 
 me that Brother Brigham had an object in view in asking me 
 to interest myself in Carrie's welfare. They told me they 
 believed that my husband, if he had not already been coun- 
 selled to marry her, would be before long. Knowing, as I 
 did, Carrie's aversion to Polygamy, these suggestions did not 
 trouble me very much ; but I begged my informants not to 
 speak of the matter in my young friend's presence as it would 
 only disturb and annoy her. I was the more anxious on this 
 point as her health iiad by that time began very perceptibly 
 to improve, and sometimes she seemed to be almost joyous 
 and light-hearted. -Sometimes she would sew, and sometimes 
 she read pr played with the children, of whom she was very 
 fond, and I always allowed her to do just as she pleased. 
 
412 "so MANY BUSYBODIES HERE. 
 
 One day my talkative friend called to see me. She had 
 not been near the house for several months, and I think, at 
 her .last visit, she must have taken offence at my telling her 
 that I thought she had not acted wisely in procuring wives 
 for her husband. She had, however, now an object in coming 
 which I soon discovered. 
 
 She was shown in, and as soon as she was fairly seated, I 
 observed that, while talking to me, she was inquisitively scru- 
 tinizing Carrie's face, as if trying to discover her character or 
 read her thoughts. Suddenly — -she did everything impuls- 
 ively — she interrupted the conversation, saying : " Sister 
 Stenhouse, I want to speak to you privately." I asked her to 
 come with me into the next room, and she did so, but before 
 I had time to close the door, she exclaimed : " Allow me to 
 congratulate you : you have done very wisely ! " 
 
 "Congratulate me upon what.'" I asked. 
 
 " Upon the excellent choice you have made for your hus- 
 band," she replied ; " I knew very well you would ponder over 
 my good counsel and seek another wife for Brother Stenhouse, 
 and I am certain that my example and my faith and prayers 
 have helped you, for I have asked the Lord to strengthen you 
 to do just what you are doing." 
 
 "Doing!" I said, "What am I doing? I really don't 
 understand what you mean." 
 
 " Oh nonsense ! " she exclaimed, " But / understand, if you 
 don't. You wish to keep it a secret, I suppose, until the 
 happy event takes place. And you are quite right in that, for 
 there are so many busybodies here, and they do interfere so 
 much in their neighbors' affairs that it isn't pleasant. But, of 
 course you needn't fear me — / shouldn't think of breathing 
 one single word of the matter, unless you wished me to do 
 so." 
 
 " I'm really at a loss to know what you mean," I said, very 
 much annoyed with her. 
 
 " Oh," she said, " If you think that I am interfering, I will 
 not say another word, for I should very much dislike to be 
 considered meddlesome. But you know, my dear Sister Sten- 
 
REALLY QUITE DISAPPOINTED. 415 
 
 house, the great interest I have always felt concerning you ; 
 from the very first when I knew you in England I always 
 prophesied great things of you, but I was a little afraid when 
 I saw your opposition to Polygamy, and I cannot tell how 
 happy I felt when I heard yesterday that you had found a 
 v/ife — and a good wife too — for your husband. 
 
 " I find a wife for my husband ! " I exclaimed. " That I 
 never would. I dislike Polygamy far too much to do so. No ; 
 if he ever wants another wife, I shall never help him to find 
 her — he'll have to j;et her himself. Besides which, I "don't 
 believe he does think of ever taking more wives." 
 
 I believed what I said. During our residence in Utah, my 
 fears had calmed down, for my husband very seldom mentioned 
 Polygamy in my presence, unless the brethren or sisters intro- 
 duced the subject. I naturally concluded that, now he had 
 seen so much of the practical results of the doctrine, he, like 
 myself, had become disgusted with it. But my talkative 
 friend, of course, knew nothing of my thoughts. "Who is 
 that young girl, then, that I saw just now?" she askfcd; "Is 
 not that Miss Grant ? " I replied that it was. 
 
 " Well," said she, " I was told that you had asked her to 
 marry your husband." 
 
 " There is no truth in the report," I said, " I am sure that 
 she has never thought of such a thing, nor have I, nor has my 
 husband; and I would not have such a thing spoken of for 
 the world." 
 
 " Well," she replied, " I am really quite disappointed. You 
 have a splendid opportunity, and I do believe that that was 
 what Brother Brigham meant when he asked you to see after 
 her. In fact, I was told that it was his only motive, all along." 
 
 " Then Brother Brigham will soon find out his mistake, I can 
 assure you," I answered, " for I never will ask her ; and, more- 
 over, if I thought for a moment that she would ever wish such 
 a thing, much as I love her, I should then hate her." 
 
 " My dear Sister," she said, " how do yoii expect ever to get 
 salvation } I suppose you think that is none of my business, 
 and that I should leave you in the hands of the Lord. But 
 
4l6 "I WANT SISTER FANNY." 
 
 .before I go, let me ask you to see Eliza Snow as soon as you 
 have an opportunity. She will build you up, and do you a 
 world of good." 
 
 I told her I needed no " building up;" all I wanted was that 
 nvy husband and myself should be left alone, and that people 
 should not meddle with our affairs. 
 
 She apologised for what she had said, and we returned to 
 the sitting-room, and she asked me to introduce her to Miss 
 Grant. I did so, although I feared that in some way or othec 
 she would be the means of interrupting the pleasant relation- 
 ship which had hitherto existed between us. 
 
 After she had gone, her conversation troubled me a great 
 deal What did it all mean ? Had the busybodies been try- 
 ing to bring about an alliance between my husband and Carrie ? 
 Had Brigham Young been working all along to this end? 
 However it might be, I resolved that, at least, Carrie should 
 know nothing of the matter from me. 
 
 One morning, the Apostle Heber C Kimball called in bis 
 carriage. It was very early, being only about seven o'clock. 
 Mr. Stenhouse went out to see him, but in his blunt way he 
 said : " I do not want you, I want Sister Fanny to take a ride 
 with me." My husband brought him into the house and he 
 told me he wanted to have a talk with me, " You must not fix 
 up," he said, " or I won't ride with you. Come along in your 
 wrapper and slippers, and just put on your sunbonnet." 
 
 I told him that I never went out in a sunbonnet. " Well 
 then, do it for the first time," he said. 
 
 I suggested that I had had no breakfast, and asked him if he 
 would wait and have some with us. 
 
 " No," said he, " I have plenty of wives around this town, 
 and we will find breakfast somewhere." So I started just as 
 I was, and he told the driver — -who, I think, was one of his own 
 sons — to call round and see "the folks " — meaning his wives. 
 Then, turning to me, he said : " You never looked prettiei^ 
 Sister Fanny, you ought always to wear a sunbonnet, but you 
 like dress a great deal too much — you will keep your husband 
 poor — ^3nd then how will he be able to carry out the commands 
 
"the finest thing in the world." :4I7 
 
 - of God"? Did you ever thmk of that ? Then, again, you dress 
 
 - your children too much ; it must take pretty well all your 
 time to make their clothes ; and, see, what it must Cost. Now, 
 I'm going to give you some good advice.. Do what my folks 
 do. I tell them to make a linsey dress for each of the chil- 
 dren, in the spring, and let them wear it all the summer, and 
 then, when the wiiiter comes, it will be so full of grease and 
 dirt that it will be sure to keep them warm. Now I'm sure 
 you won't consent to do that with your children, so it is'good 
 counsel thrown away." I knew well enough that Brother He- 
 ber was only jesting, for apparently he provided very well for 
 his family, althbugh he allowed them no luxuries. He went On 
 to say : " But that isn't what I wanted to speak to you about" ; 
 I had something else to say. When is your husband going to 
 mairry Miss Grant } That girl has got to be looked after by 
 some good man and woman, and I think that you and Brother 
 Stenhouse would do first-class. What do you think .' " 
 
 " I should not like my husband to marry her," I said. 
 
 "And why not. Sister Fanny?'* he asked. ! 
 
 " Because I myself love her," I replied. 
 
 " Why that is the very reason why he ought to do it the 
 sooner," he said, " and you would continue to love her, and 
 love her all the better, too, when she belonged to your hus- 
 band, and when you saw how much he loved her." He laughed 
 outright as he said this, and told me not to look so soliemn. 
 " Why," he said, " it's the finest thing in the world to develop 
 love in the women ; a man never gets so much attention in his 
 life as when he has got several wives all trying their best to 
 please him." 
 
 " That may be," I said, " but who is to pay attention to their 
 wives ? " 
 
 " Things have been all upside down in the world, Sister 
 Fanny," he answered, " and the Priesthood is going to set them 
 all in order. It is the women's place to minister to the men, 
 and the mien, in return, will save them in the Kingdom, if 
 they are good girls." 
 
 "Sty this time we had driven rbund several of his fields in the 
 
■418 AN UNPLEASANT FACT, 
 
 lower part of the City, and at last we stopped at the house of 
 one of his wives. She very kindly prepared breakfast for us ; 
 after which we called to see two or three other wives, and 
 then returned home. On the way back, he tried to get me to 
 promise that I would persuade my husband to marry Miss 
 Grant. This I positively refused to do, although it would have 
 been dangerous for me not to acquiesce had it not been that 
 Brother Heber was attached to me and allowed me to say what 
 I likfed against Polygamy, laughing at me and telling me to 
 " hold on " when I became too much in earnest. 
 
 This constant reference to Carrie began to trouble me se- 
 riously, although, so far, I had not yet spoken about it either to 
 her or to my husband, and did not intend to. I felt sure that 
 Carrie, poor child, was perfectly innocent ; she had refused to 
 go to several parties with us, and had otherwise declined to 
 accompany my husband, and I believed that I had no cause 
 for uneasiness. 
 
 Thus time passed, and more than a year flew by, and Carrie 
 still remained with me. Lately I thought that her manner 
 was changed and that she was a good deal altered. I noticed 
 that she was shy when in the presence of my husband, and 
 that she rather avoided him. For a long time I had not sus- 
 pected that anything was wrong between them, and the knowl- 
 edge that Carrie was troubled, and that my husband was the 
 cause, came upon me suddenly. She began by staying away 
 for several days at a time, and at last she told me that she was 
 going away for a while to visit a friend in the country. She 
 looked so unhappy that I felt sure that all was not right, and 
 begged her not to go, but she would not listen to me. It was 
 necessary for her to go, she stated, and would say no more. 
 She bade me good-bye, and for two months I heard nothing 
 of her, supposing that she was in the country, and then I was 
 surprised to learn that she was visiting with a friend in an- 
 other part of the city, and that she was very ill indeed. I im- 
 mediately went to call upon her, and she was much pleased to 
 see me, and then I discovered that she had not been in the 
 country at all, but had been there in the City with her friend. 
 
CARRIES LADY-FRIEND. 419 
 
 I could not at the time understand her conduct, but as she, in 
 common with most other delicate people, was rather capricious, 
 I allowed it to pass without any comment. She told me that 
 as soon as she felt a little better she would come and see me, 
 but she never came, and I was somewhat offended at her sup- 
 posed neglect, and thought that before I visited her again I 
 would wait and see whether she first came up to our house. 
 
 All this time, a friend of Carrie's was in the habit of look- 
 ing in very frequently upon some trifling errand or other, and 
 I noticed that she'&lways waited for the return of my husband, 
 and then made some excuse to go out with him, and they had 
 long conversations together. There was some mystery, I 
 clearly perceived, and as a wife and a woman I determined 
 that it was my duty to find out what that mystery was. 
 
CHAPTER XXX. 
 
 TAKING A SECOND WIFE :— THE EXPERIENCE OF THE 
 FIRST. 
 
 A Mysterious Errand — Going a Courting — Silence and Obedience, a Wife's 
 Duty — Kept in the Dark — Mistaken Kindness — The Conflict Between Faith 
 and Reason — A "Rebellious Woman" — My Poor Friend Carrie — Women 
 Advocating Polygamy — Finding a Wife for My Husband — The Poor Victim 
 — An Unusually Loving Husband — A Consultation with Brother Brigham — 
 The Curse of a Whole Life— The Fiat of the Prophet— The Penalties of 
 Disobedience — " I Can Only Consent" — A Message from Eliza R. Snow — 
 The Bad Logic of the Poetess — An Unwilling Sacrifice — ^An Unalterable 
 Decision. 
 
 I DID not presume to ask my husband what it was that he 
 had to talk about with Carrie's friend, but I instihctively 
 felt what it might be, and I was so much troubled in mind 
 that I thought I would never go to see her again. 
 
 By that time I had learned, as every Mormon wife does 
 learn, never to ask questions. The wife of a Saint never 
 dares to ask her husband whither he is going or when he will 
 return. She is not expected to know or care what business 
 her husband may have on hand when he leaves , home in the 
 evening, after making a most elaborate toilet, with frequent 
 admiration of himself in the mirror. If the poor wife feels 
 that she must say something, to give vent to her overwrought 
 feelings, she simply asks in a conscious, guilty way, when he 
 will be home again ; wishing too often in her secret heart 
 
SPARING A WIFE'S FEELINGS. 421 
 
 that he might say — Never. Her duty is to be silent and 
 unobservant ; and though some poor women have, when their 
 outraged feelings were overcharged, inadvertently betrayed 
 curiosity respecting the movements of the absent ones, they 
 have soon been sternly taught their duty, and those loving 
 husbands have given them good cause to repent of their 
 inquisitiveness. 
 
 And who can blame these disconsolate, lonely women if 
 thus they feel.' Their religion alone is to blame. It has 
 been the destruction of that sweet confidence which should 
 exist between husband and wife, and it has divided hearts and 
 interests which should inseparably have been for ever one. 
 This, slowly but no less painfully, I was beginning to under- 
 starid. However earnestly I might try to combat the idea, 
 my life was wretched with the one continual fear of what I 
 might see or hear of my husband. I tried to drive away such 
 thoughts, and I called to mind all the acts of kindness and 
 devotion which he had shown whose love my heart held dear. 
 Sometimes, arguing with myself, I said : No, my husband will 
 not deceive me ; no matter what other men may do or be with 
 their wives, my husband will be frank and true with me. 
 
 So I thought then ; but I was destined to realise in my own 
 experience how utterly impossible it is, for any man, no matter 
 how honest and truthful he may naturally be, to practice 
 Polygamy without becoming a hypocrite ; and the more he 
 loves his wife, the greater hypocrite he will become, trying to 
 deceive her >with the foolish notion that half his cruelty is 
 done in attempting to " spare her feelings." 
 
 Up to this time I had been able, with some effort, to banish 
 those doubts which would, against my will, intrude upon my 
 mind. I had schooled myself to believe, that when it was 
 really necessary, my husband would frankly and freely speak 
 to me about that subject which was ever uppermost in my 
 heart, and I knew my own nature sufficiently well to feel sure 
 that I could grapple with any difficulty, if once I looked it 
 boldly in the face. All that I feared was deception on my 
 husband's part. That, I felt, would be more than I could 
 26 
 
422 "I DARED NOT THIXK. 
 
 endure. In the whole course of our married life hitherto, I 
 , had never known him to deceive me, and even now, although 
 influenced by the counsel of the Elders, he thought of bring- 
 ing to our home another wife, I well kn^w that he sympa- 
 thised with me ; for he knew the deep, deep sorrow that the 
 dread alone of Polygamy had for years brought to my heart, 
 and he might well be apprehensive of what the practical 
 reality would be. At a later period, I knew that he fell iato 
 that error, common among Mormon men, of keeping "it" 
 from their wives until all was settled. This was not the kind 
 of treatment calculated to inspire me with confidence ; it may 
 suit some natures, but I doubt even that. Men frequently 
 imagine that they understand a woman's nature better than 
 she does herself, and acting upon this belief, and full of good 
 intentions, they err most fatally. 
 
 My husband thought that he was acting kindly to me when 
 he said nothing of all that transpired between him and Carrie; 
 but when I saw the visits of Carrie's lady-friend so frequently 
 repeated, I began to suspect the truth and was much troubled. 
 I was, however, too proud to question him on the subjetJt, at 
 the risk of getting an evasive answer, and it was evident that 
 the two persons most intimately interested in the matter 
 intended that I should be kept in the dark. I saw through all 
 this and it did not tend either to restore my peace of mind or 
 to make me more pleasant in my intercourse with Carrie or 
 my husband. , In their conduct I could see nothing but 
 deception, however good their intentions might be, and I felt 
 that they were treating me as a child. The thought was very 
 painful to me, and it was only with a great effort tha/t I. sup- 
 pressed it. 
 
 In fact, I dared not think ; but when doubts and fears 
 crowded themselves upon my mind, so that I was compelled 
 to give them utterance, I would lock myself in my room or 
 wander away to some lonely spot and there vent my feelings 
 in indignant words. At other times I did think over the 
 wrongs which Polygamy inflicted, until my feelings were' 
 almost ibeyond endurance ; then in those moments of anguish 
 
A "REBELLIOUS WOMAN. 433. 
 
 I would prostrate myself in humility and repentance feeiore 
 the Lord, and would plead lor strength to endure and submit 
 to His will. Then again, I would pace the room-, my soul 
 filled with rebellion, and heartfelt curses against a system 
 vsilich had so withered and blighted all my laf e arid had taken 
 for ever the sunshine out of my exjsljence. For ever ! Ah ! 
 how those words lingered in wiy thoughts ; how they chilled 
 my heart, and left me utterly without hope i; for we ;were told 
 that eternity would be but a repetition of this life on earth. 
 Polygamy, we were. taught, was to be practiced in eternity;- 
 it was to be the "Celestial Order of Heaven*'; it was an 
 eternal law. But if it was so Joaitihsome now, how should I 
 ever become reconciled to, and happy in, it } Then too we 
 were told by the Elders that we should have no other heaven 
 than that which we began on earth, and I was at a loss to 
 conjecture what sort oi a heaven mine would be. It may 
 appear strange that such absurdities should ever seriously 
 have found a place in my mind ; but when one at starting 
 accepts a system as true — however absurd that system may 
 be — and learns to regard aU that is connected with it as 
 beyond the shadow of a doubt — after years of discipline, the 
 mind is ready to receive almost anything that may be offered 
 to it from the same source. In my own case, I was so con- 
 vinced that, however reason might object, all that we were 
 taught was true, that I was utterly without hope, and would 
 have felt happy could Ihave believed that death was annihila- 
 tion. Of earthly happiness I had given up all expectation. 
 
 These painful feelings, of course, had a marked effect upon 
 my daily life. I grew weary, and my health failed, I became 
 thin, and my features were marked with care and anxiety. 
 When people came to see me, I said little to them and their 
 very presence I felt irksome. Mechanically I went through 
 the daily routine of duty, but my heart was in nothing that I 
 did. I dared not even trust myself to speak to any one, for 
 fear of becoming the subject of conversation and attracting 
 the attention of the authorities, which was not at all desirable, 
 for the position of a " rebellious woman " in those days was 
 
424 ALONE ! 
 
 anything but pleasant. I stood alone. Upon my husband I 
 looked with suspicion ; my children were too young, to under- 
 stand me ; Carrie, whom I had taken to my heart, to whom I 
 had confided my sorrows, whose own welfare had been so dear 
 to me, had, as I thought, turned against me, like an adder, 
 and there was no one in whom I could trust. It seemed to 
 me too cruel for Carrie to treat me so, and yet I could not 
 doubt that she was acting unfaithfully towards me. 
 
 Surrounded by my children, living under the same roof 
 with my husband, my heart was, nevertheless, filled with a 
 sense of utter loneliness and desolation. There was no one 
 in whom I could confide, to whom I might tell my sorrows, 
 and from whose counsel or strength I might derive comfort. 
 I dared not even go and lay my griefs before God, for I had 
 been led to believe that all my suffering was caused by an 
 arbitrary decree which He willed to be enforced. How false 
 a notion of that loving heavenly Father whose tender care is 
 so manifestly shown in his geritle dealings with the weakest 
 of His creatures ! 
 
 It was now about six months since Carrie left my house, 
 and I was under the impression that all that time certain 
 well-intentioned sisters had been doing all they could to bring 
 about a marriage between her and my husband. Her health, 
 however, was so bad that sometimes for weeks together she 
 did not leave her room. At the time, of course, I knew 
 nothing of this, but I afterwards heard of it. When I called 
 upon her, which I did when I found that she was too ill to 
 come to see me, I thought she was greatly changed in her 
 manner, but when I thought of , her lonely position my heart 
 warmed towards her and I forgot all my suspicions. Cer- 
 tainly, I wanted to ask her one plain question relative to my 
 husband, but my pride would not allow me to speak to her on 
 that subject unless she first mentioned it to me. One day I 
 thought that she was about to make a confession. Talking 
 indifferently of ordinary matters, she suddenly said, ," I am 
 surprised you ever Wish to see me ; " but when I asked her 
 why, expecting that she would now explain what had so long 
 
AN OBJECT OF INTEREST. 425 
 
 troubled me, she answered evasively, and nothing more was 
 said. 
 
 I shall always believe that I myself was not the only person 
 interested at that time about Carrie's feelings. There are 
 some of the sisters who — strange as it may seem — spend their 
 lives in promoting the practice of Polygamy. When once 
 these good sisters have set their hearts to get a man a second 
 wife, they do not let a trifle discourage them ; if they do not 
 succeed with one girl, they try with another, and it is seldom 
 that they fail of meeting with their reward. 
 
 In Carrie, at this time, they found a subject of peculiar 
 interest. If her failing health put an end, for a time, to all 
 thoughts of her own marriage, that was no reason why my 
 husband should not select a second wife elsewhere. Poor 
 victim ! He, of course, had no pleasure or interest in the 
 matter ; his religion alone compelled him ; he suffered as 
 much as I did ! To look round on all the young and pretty 
 girls he knew ; to select one and pay his court to her, was 
 painful enough I dare venture to assert ; but he seemed to 
 bear it very well indeed, and the " Revelation " appeared to 
 agree with him nicely. 
 
 With Carrie's absence from our house, the rumors about 
 her which had troubled me so much somewhat subsided. 
 Nothing could silence the secret apprehension which contin- 
 ually held my soul in dread ; but the fear of my young friend's 
 influence once removed, I was comparatively at peace. It was, 
 however, but the lull before the storm. I soon learned that 
 in losing Carrie I did not lose Polygamy, and from about that 
 time I can date my husband's desire to sustain his brethren in 
 the performance of their duty and his wish to act as they did, 
 especially in reference to the " Celestial Order of Heaven." 
 Just at that time the " Morrill Bill " for the suppression of 
 Polygamy was presented to Congress, and all true Mormons 
 were made to feel that it was their duty to stand by their 
 leader ; and though, in itself, they might see nothing desirable 
 in Polygamy, yet, if they had not already multiplied wives, it 
 was their duty to do so without any delay. 
 
426 POLYGAMY UPON THE MIND. 
 
 Evet watchful as I was, I noticed little changes in my hus- 
 band, which under ordinary circumstances would have escaped 
 my observation. By this time one all-absorbing idea bad 
 taken possession of my mind, and my husband's thoughts) I 
 beheve, were turned in the same direction — only our wishes 
 did not exactly coincide. Polygamy was the thought common 
 to both, but upon its desirability: we entertained dissimilar 
 views. 
 
 A man with Polygamy upon his mind was then a creature 
 which I did not understand, and which I had not fully studied- 
 Some years later, when I had a little more eicperience jn Mor- 
 monism, I discovered several never-failing signs by which 
 one might know when a man wished to take another wife. 
 He would suddenly awaken to a sense of his duties ; he would 
 hate serious misgivings as to whether the Lord would pardon 
 his neglect in not living up to his privileges ; he wouM become 
 very religious, and would attend to his meetings^bis " tes- 
 timony meetings," singing meetings, and all sorts of other 
 "meetings," which seemed just then to be very numerous, 
 and in various other ways he would show' his anxiety to live 
 up to his religion. He would thus be frequently absent from 
 home, which, of course; he deeply regrets, as he loves so 
 dearly the society of his wife and children. The wife, per- 
 haps, poor simple soul ! — thinks that he is becoming unusu^ly 
 loving and affectionate, for he used not, at one time, to express 
 much sorrow at leaving her done for a few hours ; and she 
 thinks how happy she ought to feel that such a change has 
 come over her husband, although, to be sure, he was always 
 as good as most of the other Mormon men. 
 
 My husband was a good and consistent Mormon, and very 
 itnuch like the rest of his brethren in these matters ; and the 
 brethren, knowing themselves how he felt, sympathised with 
 him, and urged hira on, and, by every means in their power; 
 aided him in his noble attempts to carry out " the commands 
 of God!" 
 
 One evening, when he came hoiae, he seemed preoccupied 
 as if some matter of importance were troubling his mind. 
 
BROUGHT HOME TO ME. 427 
 
 This set me thinking, too, I saw that he wanted to say some- 
 thing to me, and I waited patiently. " I am going to the ball," 
 he presently remarked, " and I am going alone, for Brother 
 Brigham wishes me to meet him there." I knew at once 
 what was passing in his mind and dared not question him. 
 He went and saw Brigham. What passed between them, I 
 do not know, but when my husband returned he intimated 
 to mc that it had been arranged that he should take another 
 wife. 
 
 The idea that some day another wife would be added to our 
 household was evdSr present in my mind, but somehow, when 
 the fact was placed before me in so many unmistakeabljC 
 words, my heart sank within me, and I shrank from the real- 
 isation that our home was at last to be desecrated by the foul 
 presence of Polygamy. The very effort which my husband 
 made to break the news gently to me made my heart more 
 rebellious. 
 
 What intelligence could be more terrible to an affectionate 
 wife, the mother of a family, than this. In my girlhood, as 
 the reader knows, I had forsaken all for the sake of my hus- 
 band and his religion. We had toiled together and suffered 
 together. Fpr fifteen long years our interests and our affec- 
 tions had been one and inseparable. Nothing, but the fear 
 of Polygamy, had ever come between my husb&nd and myself ; 
 — but for that horrible apprehension, and the unhappy feeling 
 which it occasioned, no wedded pair could have been more 
 truly united than my husband and my§elf, but that, certainly — 
 that only — had cast a shadow over the bUss of our domestic 
 life. Our little ones^-a mutual care — had grown .up aroun'd 
 us ; they had occupied all our thoughts and all our atten- 
 tion, and in them our own love seemed to be renewed. They 
 were now, at least the elder ones, fast ripening into man- 
 hood and womanhood and gave promise that they would be 
 the glory and blessing of our old age. Our home was never 
 disturbed by any of those petty dissentions and divided inter- 
 ests which make so many families unhappy. When in the 
 evening we gathered round our peaceful fireside, , in th» 
 
428 "father TAKING ANOTHER WIFE." 
 
 pleasant interchange of thought, in intelligent conversation, 
 and domestic amusements, and in little loving courtesies, we 
 reahsed, as far as could be realised in this imperfect state, the 
 meaning of that household expression — " a little heaven upon 
 earth." In a word ; — while God had abundantly blessed us in 
 basket and in store, — my husband's tender affection had ever 
 been to me the same as it was on our marriage-day ; my heart, 
 with all the true deep love which a woman can feel, had found 
 its only happiness in him ; while our children, bound to each of 
 us alike by the fondest ties, formed a family, which for unos- 
 tentatious, but true, affection, and for unity of thought and 
 aim, could not anywhere have been surpassed. 
 
 But now all this was to be changed. Let a Gentile mother 
 think how she would feel if she heard her children talk of 
 " Father taking another wife !" Let her think what it would 
 be if another woman — however good and pure she might be 
 — were brought home to take her place in the family circle, to 
 divide with her her husband's affections, to come, after years 
 of undivided love, between herself and him who had so long 
 been all in all to her ! And yet, a]l this Lfelt, and, oh, much, 
 fttuch more than I could ever express ; for who can tell in words 
 the deepest bitterness which the heart too sadly feels } 
 
 Everything around me changed. Every one I met re- 
 minded me of the miserable idea which had taken possession 
 of my thoughts. All that before had seemed so bright and 
 beautiful now revolted me, and my soul itself seemed filled 
 with unavailing and unnatural hatred. I hated Mormonism, I 
 hated the Revelation. I hated myself, and I hated my hus- 
 tand. All that had been influenced by, or in contact with, the 
 detested and accursed thing I utterly abhorred. My woman's 
 soul within me made me feel that I should gladly stand aloof 
 fropi that degrading horror, and shake even from my clotheg, 
 the touch of any one, or anything, that had been polluted by 
 any connection with it. 
 
 Almost fainting, now that the truth came home to me in all 
 its startling reality, I asked my husband when he proposed to, 
 take his second wife. 
 
HALTING BETWEEN -TWO OPINIONS. 429 
 
 " Immediately," he replied, " that is to say, as soon as I 
 can." 
 
 We were silent for some time. My mind was troubled. 
 Had I been able to consider the whole affair as an outrage 
 upon humanity in general, and an insult to my sex in particu- 
 lar, I should have replied with scorn and defiance. Had I 
 implicitly believed in the divinity of the Revelation I should 
 have bowed my head in meek submission. But I did neither 
 of these. The feelings of my heart naturally led me to hate 
 with a most perfect hatred the very mention of the word 
 Polygamy, while at the same time I still believed, or tried to 
 make myself believe, that the Revelation was from God, and 
 must therefore be obeyed. Such was the strange and contraT 
 dictory position in which I was placed. 
 
 I tried to reason with myself. My husband and the Elders 
 had taught me that the fault was not in Mormonism but in my 
 early Gentile training; and I believed them, and thought that 
 all the inconsistencies which I had heard of, or seen, in Brig- 
 ham Young and the other prominent men, should be attributed 
 to the weakness of human nature ; and not to the system. Still, 
 doubts would suggest themselves ; only, however, to be imme- 
 diately suppressed, for it was by slow degrees that the 
 truth dawned upon my mind. It wa^ only natural that I 
 should hesitate. I was a wife and a mother, and I could not 
 consult my own wishes or desires. It was my duty, I knew, 
 to do what was right, at whatever cost to my own feelings, and 
 I dared not think of open rebellion. Had I then rebelled, I 
 must have renounced, all that in life I held dearest — husband,- 
 children, all. I knew my husband's devotion to the faith and 
 that he would not hesitate to make any sacrifice for it. He 
 would even glory in giving up what men hold dearest, for the 
 sake ot the Church, and we had both been taught that whoso- 
 ever forsook husband or wife for the sake of the Church, it 
 should be accounted to them for righteousness. I saw around 
 me daily and hourly the effects of this teaching upon the un- 
 fortunate wives and children, but I nevertheless strove — .how 
 painfully none but myself could tell— rto banish from my mind 
 
430 DISCUSSING THE DIFFICULTY. 
 
 every doubt, and to esteem the natural questioning of my heart 
 a sin. 
 
 "Are you not satisfied that it ig^,rigljt for me to take another 
 , wife?" my husband asked. 
 
 "I have never yet really doubted that the Revelation was 
 from God," I replied, "for I cannot believe that any man would 
 be so blasphemous and wicked as to set forth such a revela- 
 tion in God's name, unless he received it as he said he did. If 
 it is from God, of course you are right to obey it ; but if I 
 were to consult my own feelings I would never consent to live 
 in Polygamy. I would rather risk salvation, and tell the Lord 
 that He had placed upon me a burden heavier than I was able 
 to bear, and that I regarded Him as a hard taskmaster. But 
 when the salvation of my husband and childa-en, to say noth- 
 ing of my own, is at stake^ my wishes and happiness go for 
 nothing, and I can only consent." 
 
 From that moment, I felt like a condemned criminal for 
 whom there was not a shadow of hope or a chance of escape^ 
 Could I possibly have looked, upon the sacred obligations of 
 marriage as lightly as Mormonism taught me to regard them, 
 I believe I should have broken every tie and risked the conse- 
 quences. But I had vowed to be faithful unto death, and if 
 this second marriage was for my husband's welfare, and for the 
 salvation of us and of our children, I resolved to make the 
 effort to subdue my rebellious heart, or die in the attempt. 
 For the iirst time in my life, I thanked God that I was not a 
 man, and that the salvation of my family did not depend upon 
 me ; for if fifty revelations had commanded it I could not have 
 taken the responsibility of withering one loving, trusting 
 heart. I felt that if such laws were given to us, our woman's 
 nature ought to have been adapted to them, so that submission 
 to them might be as much a pleasure to us as it was to the 
 Biien, and that we might at least feel that we were justly dealt 
 with. 
 
 Not long after this, my husband brought me a message 
 from Eliza R. Snow. She wanted me to take tea with her and 
 he urged me to accept the invitati©ii. . I did not >yant to go, 
 
ELIZAS LOGIC. 43 1 
 
 for I knew too well her object in sending for me. She had 
 been talking with my husband about me, I felt sure, and that 
 was how she came to send the message by him. I went, how- 
 ever, and, as I anticipated, she wanted to talk with me about 
 Polygamy, and to try to convince me that it was for our best 
 interests that my husband should take another wife, and that 
 it was quite time he did so. 
 
 I told her that he was not yet in a position to do so. "We 
 have quite a family," I said, "and I think he should at least be 
 alloA*ed to wait until he has accumulated a little before he 
 embarrasses himself with new responsibilities." 
 
 "And where would the kingdom of God be," she asked, "if 
 we had all talked in this way ? Let your husband take more 
 wives, and let them help him, and you will feel blessed, in 
 keeping the commands of God." 
 
 "There would be no good in my husband taking another 
 wife," I said, "while I feel as I do now. To be acceptable to 
 the Lord, a sacrifice should be made willingly and in a proper 
 spi*it, and I do not think that under present circumstances it 
 is proper fca: him to do this thing." 
 
 " Let him be the judge of that," she replied ; " do not seek 
 to control him ; he alone is responsible, and therefore let him 
 do as he thinks best." 
 
 "But," I said, "he himself does not want another wife yet." 
 But I spoke with hesitation, for my heart misgave me. 
 
 "You are mistaken ; " she answered, "your husband is a very 
 good man and desires to live his religion, and it is a great grief 
 to him to know that you fed as you do, and you really must 
 try to overcome your opposition. If you had a loaf of bread 
 to make, and you made it, and it was pronounced good, do you 
 think it would be of the slightest consequence what feelings 
 agitated your mind while you were making it, so long as it was 
 well made.' So it is with the Lord. He does not care with 
 what feelings you give your husband another wife, so long as 
 you do so." 
 
 This was a miserable attempt at reasoning, to say nothing 
 if its falsity ; and notwithstanding all she said, I still felt that 
 
432 I RESOLVE TO GIVE THEM TROUBLE. 
 
 no blessing would even attend an unwilling sacrifice, and I 
 told her so. She spoke to me very kindly, however, and tried 
 to encourage me, and suggested that Carrie would be a very 
 proper person for my husband to marry. I had now no longer 
 any doubt in my mind' thdt it had been all "arranged," and that 
 opposition on my part would be all in vain. I was indignant 
 at this, for I believed that, as the Revelation itself said, I — 
 the first wife — ought first to have been consulted. This, how- 
 ever, I subsequently found was as false as the system itself. 
 I believed that I was the victim of a conspiracy, and I did not 
 intend to submit without giving them some trouble. 
 
 I returned home, pondering over what had been said to me, 
 with a feeling of intense weariness oppressing my heart. I 
 did not know what to think. It appeared to me that every 
 one had determined that Carrie should be my husband's sec- 
 ond wife, and I now believed, with my talkative friend, that 
 Brigham Young had certainly intended it from the beginning. 
 I felt that I would rather that he should marry almost any one 
 else than her ; for I felt certain that I should hate any woman 
 whom he might marry, no matter how much I might have 
 loved her before. 
 
 But my mind was soon relieved of its trouble respecting 
 poor Carrie, for, as I before mentioned, her failing health forbade 
 all thoughts of marriage, and my husband, after a short time, 
 never spoke to me about her. The real cause of my distress, 
 however, was by no means removed — it was determined, 
 without appeal, that my husband should, notwithstanding any 
 impediment to the contrary, take another wife, whoever that 
 chosen one might be, — my apprehensions, therefore, were not 
 removed, they were only turned in another direction. 
 
CHAPTER XXXI. 
 
 TRIALS— THE SECOND WIFE CHOSEN— SHADOWS OF LIFE. 
 
 A List of Eligible Young Ladies — Making a Selection — Asking the First Wife's 
 Consent— My Husband's Bride Elect — Watching a Husband's Wooing — " Her 
 Little Day of Triumph "—Another Victim to the Heavenly "Order"— The 
 Important Claims of Love — Reminiscences of a First Love — Submissive to 
 the Faith — A Man Cannot Love Two at One Time — A Very Youthful Bride— 
 A "Very Painful Task" — A Long Courtship — Bearing the Cross — A Visit 
 from my Husband's Bride-Elect — Belinda — Carrie Grant's Illness — Divulging 
 a Secret — " Love me one day Longer " — TheApproach of Death — A Strange 
 Promise for a Wife to Give — I Choose a Wife for My Husband — Carrie's 
 Last Hours— "It is Better So" — A Sacred Pledge— My Last Visit to Carrie— 
 A Sad Farewell. 
 
 THE next day my husband proposed several young girls for 
 my consideration, but I felt that it was of very little 
 consequence to me upon whom his choice might fall. 
 
 It is a custom among the Mormon married men — those at 
 least who make any pretensions to doing what is right and 
 who wish to spare the feelings of their wives as much as the 
 degrading system will allow — to make it appear as if the sec- 
 ond wife were chosen by the first, and they go through the 
 form of consulting with her as to who shall be selected. The 
 husband will mention the names of several eligible young 
 ladies, among whom is sure to be the one upon whom he has 
 already set his affections. If the wife should try to make 
 herself agreeable by suggesting one or another of the^e young 
 
434 THE BRIGHT, PARTICULAR STAR. 
 
 ladies, some objection is sure to be raised. One is top thought- 
 less ; the relations of another are not quite so agreeable as 
 they might be ; and the temper of a third is said to be not 
 very good. In this way, one after another is taken off the list, 
 until only one remains — the bright particular star of whom 
 all along the husband has been thinking, — and if the wife 
 should make any objections to this one, the husband, of course, 
 has a ready answer. In most cases her extreme youth is an 
 excuse for everything ; she will have plenty of time to learn, 
 and will be the more ready to be taught. 
 
 When once they have obtained, the reluctant consent of 
 their wives, it is astonishing how bright and cheerful these 
 Mormon husbands become. Notwithstanding all that they 
 have said to. the contrary, it is evident that Polygamy is no 
 trial to their faith. They say that it is as great a cross to 
 them as it is to their wives, but somehow or other they take 
 very kindly to it. 
 
 It was soon settled who should be the honored maiden to 
 whom my husband should pay his addresses. Her name was 
 Belinda, and she was thef daughter of the Apostle Parley P. 
 Pratt, whom I have already mentioned as coming to an untimely 
 end in Arkansas. I, of course, was not expected to ask any 
 questions or evince any curiosity respecting the girl or my 
 husband's relations towards her. I had given my consent, I 
 had acted my part, or at least all the part that was expected of 
 me ; I had fulfilled my duty as a Mormon first wife when I 
 agreed to another wife being taken, and, henceforth, all that 
 transpired was — so the Elders would have said— no business 
 of mine. 
 
 Mormon domestic matters are to the Gentile looker-on a 
 perfect mystery. No one outside of Mormonism can realise 
 the position of a wife, in her husband's own house, waiting for 
 hirri to bring home to her another wife. But the Mormon 
 women understand and feel it all; They know what it is to 
 watch the course of a husband's courtship and note how he 
 progresses with his wooing ; and they could, if they dared, tell 
 the painful feelings that rankle in their breasts at such a time. 
 
"ANOtHER JEWEL IN HIS CROWN." 435 
 
 Nor is the new wife much happier. The girl against whom 
 the first wife now feels so bitterly, will, in all probability, some 
 day be as unhappy as she is now. In due course of time, 
 when the wooing is over and the maiden is won, she will be 
 brought home, and will have her little day of triumph until 
 her lord and master deems it necessary to add another " jewel " 
 to his crown, and then her heart will be rent, as the first wife's 
 was, and another crushed and degraded victim will be added 
 to that list of suffering women who have become martyrs to 
 this heavenly order, of marriage 1 
 
 Intent on his wooing, the husband is, of course, particularly 
 attentive to his personal appearance, and spares no pains to 
 render himself attractive to the young lady whose affections 
 he proposes to win. Business, and domestic duties, of course, 
 give place to the more important claims of love, and every- 
 thing must be sacrificed upon the altar of that blind divinity. 
 The wife sees all this, but she is not expected to feel. She 
 remembers the time when her husband used to find his great- 
 est pleasure in paying to her those little endearing attentions 
 which lov3 demands, and finds its reward in rendering. She 
 remembers the time when he vowed at the altar to be faithful 
 until death, and how often afterwards he has reiterated that 
 vow and declared that no other woman should ever win from 
 him a thought that would be disloyal to her. 
 
 It is impossible for any man to act justly — ^to say nothing 
 of acting with affection^towards his wife while his thoughts 
 and wishes are wandering towards a younger rival. Words 
 are uttered, which in themselves perhaps are trifling, but which, 
 under the circumstances, have a meaning bitterly cruel ; and 
 little things are done which, like the worm at the root, gnaw 
 the heart itself and embitter the whole existence. Women 
 whose minds were said to be strong, have written and spoken 
 much of late years in an endeavor to unsex themselves. That 
 men and women should be morally and socially equal, no right- 
 minded person can for a moment doubt, but a woman never 
 was and never will be a man. In sentiment and feeling, her 
 mind is utterly the reverse of masculine, and no man, how- 
 
436 HE COULD NOT LOVE TWO AT ONCE ! 
 
 ever refined or sensitive he may be, can ever fully understand 
 a woman's heart. A man, may be faithfully and devotedly at- 
 tached to his wife, but she can never be to him what he is to 
 her. Every thought and affection of her soul is centred in 
 him. He is the life of her own existence. In her eyes he is 
 all that is noble and good and true. He is her idol, her love, 
 her all. Horribly then, Ah, a thousand times horribly and 
 cruelly do they sin against the holiest principles of human na- 
 ture, who crush with coldness and unkindness those warm and 
 tender sentiments of affection which in her heart a woman 
 cherishes towards her husband. How often haye I mourned 
 in secret some careless word, or cold, indifferent look which 
 my truant husband has thoughtlessly bestowed upon me when 
 leaving the house to visit his intended bride — words, which, to 
 him, had no particular meaning, perhaps, but which pierced 
 my heart : — I knew too well that he could not love two at once. 
 It was evident which way his thoughts were wandering, al- 
 though he, like the rest of his brethren, assured me that prin- 
 ciple and religion — and no other motive — attracted him so 
 often to the side of his more youthful and, of course, more 
 pleasing companion. 
 
 My husband's intended certainly was very young — almost 
 too young for a bride she would have been considered in any 
 other community — and I must in fairness allow that she was 
 very handsome. It is of the utmost importance that a Mor- 
 mon girl should marry young. Women everywhere are never 
 anxious to grow old, but among the Mormons age is especially 
 dreaded by the women, for when years have robbed them of 
 their personal attractions, in most cases they lose all hold upon 
 , their husband's affections and find themselves obliged to give 
 place to prettier and more youthful rivals. A woman's posi- 
 tion in the world to come, as I have before mentioned, depends, 
 so the elders say, very much upon the number of children she 
 has borne in this ; it is, therefore, a consideration of the very 
 first importance that she should marry as early in life as possi- 
 ble, and this, obligation is never for a moment overlooked by 
 the refined and pure-minded Mormon men. 
 
A VERT PAINFUL TASK I 437 
 
 ■ And now began the " painful task " of wooing the young 
 lady. My husband told me that it was " a very painful duty," 
 and as an obedient wife I felt bound to believe him. It was, 
 of course, no pleasure to him to pay his addresses to an in- 
 teresting young girl ; it was no anxiety to be with her which 
 made him hasten away to the damsel's house of an evening. 
 Oh dear no ! it was pure principle, love for the kingdom of 
 God, and " a very painful task ! " He seemed, however, to 
 bear it remarkably well, and manifested a zeal which was per- 
 fectly astonishing -tj me considering the circumstances. In 
 fact, I felt it my duty to restrain him a little for the sake of his 
 health, for he seemed so anxious to perform his " task " prop- 
 erly that he could scarcely spare time to take his meals ; but 
 regardless of his own feelings he did not pay much attention 
 to my suggestions. 
 
 But deeply as I sympathised with my husband, there were 
 times when I felt that mine was indeed no imaginary sorrow, 
 and that nothing could lull the storm that had gathered in my 
 breast. The affliction which I had so long dreaded was now 
 right at my door, and the most painful feelings agitated my 
 mind. Sometimes I shut myself up in my own room and tried 
 to reason with myself ; then I would kneel, and pray, and weep 
 with passionate emotion ; and again I would pace the floor, 
 my heart overflowing with anger and indignation. I never, at 
 that time, knew what it was to be happy, for I felt that I was a 
 burden and hindrance to my husband and I longed to die. I 
 had loved him so devotedly that I could not even now cast 
 him from my heart, and though I felt bitterly my position, I 
 believed that he would not willingly wound me and that he 
 was acting from the purest of motives. But it was all in vain. 
 I could not change my nature, and my heart would rebel. 
 
 The courtship was continued for months, and the end seemed 
 as far off as ever ; for on account of the youthfulness of the 
 bride elect my husband wished the marriage indefinitely post- 
 poned. It would be impossible for me to tell the thousand 
 annoyances and indignities to which I was forced to submit-— 
 trials which might appear too trifling even to nauie, but which 
 27 
 
438 " IF MATTERS WERE REVERSED ? " 
 
 to a wife, under such circumstances, were crosses which she 
 found it hard enough to bear. My husband knew nothing, of 
 these things, and, had he done so, ij is more t*han probable that 
 he would have considered it weakness in me to be troubled 
 about matters of such small consequence — little actions and 
 foolish words which he would have said I ought to have treated 
 with contempt. It was easy to say that, but not so easy to do. 
 Let any wife picture to herself how she would feel, if after 
 schooling her heart to submission, after realising that she was 
 no longer to be first and dearest in her husband's affections, 
 she were to be constantly hearing the friends and relations of 
 the young girl to whom her husband was engaged boasting of 
 his devotion to her and openly expressing their belief that he 
 had never loved before ! How would' any wife be pleased if, 
 whenever her husband's intended received a valuable present 
 from him, she were particularly informed of the fact, and a 
 thousand little aggravating details were added to make her, if 
 possible, more miserable. I do not know how such things 
 would appear to a man's mind if matters were reversed and 
 the wife took a couple of husbands to her heart, but I have 
 noticed that " the lords of creation " are generally — and, no 
 doubt, justly — sensitive enough, even if they only suspect their 
 wives of engaging in a. trifling flirtation ; and I know that, 
 however silly she may be considered for doing so, a woman in 
 her heart feels all these things. 
 
 A woman can nerve herself to endure almost anything, and 
 outwardly she may conceal her feelings, but there are limits 
 beyond which endurance is not possible. A chance meeting 
 with the girl who has superseded her in her husband's love ; or 
 worse still, should she chance to surprise the affectionate couple 
 tHe d tite, is sufficient to dispel all her good resolutions and 
 to destroy that tranquility of mind which she finds it so 
 difficult to preserve. She becomes sick at heart, nervous and 
 entirely unfitted for her duties. I have frequently heard Mor- 
 mon women say that, notwithstanding their husbands had been 
 for many years polygamists, they could never see the .other 
 wives without a feeling of anger and indignation arising in 
 
CULTIVATING BELINDA'S ACQUAINTANCE. 439 
 
 their hearts. I know that in my own case I never became 
 reconciled to the system. 
 
 My husband was called away to the Eastern States upon 
 business, and his marriage was 'postponed, as I have already 
 mentioned, to give the bride an opportunity of growing a little 
 older first. I thought that the present would be a good time 
 to show her some little attentions, which I believed it was my 
 duty to do. The idea of coming in contact with her was cei'- 
 tainly not at all pleasant, but I felt that it was only right for 
 me to act in a friendjjr manner towards her, however painful it 
 might be. She was the cause of much sorrow to me, but I 
 could not blame her, for she had been born and brought up in 
 the system, and, of course, supposed it true ; but, for all that, 
 it is utterly impossible for any woman to think complacently 
 of another who is weaning from her her husband's affections, 
 however innocent that other may be of intentional wrong. 
 
 Belinda was a very nice girl and, under other circumstances, 
 I believe I should have liked her very much. I looked upon 
 her as little more than a child, and my husband has frequently 
 told me that he also regarded her in that light, but to me it 
 was of small consequence that he thought of her as a child, 
 so long as he acted towards her as a woman. Now that he 
 was away from home there was no danger that she would meet 
 him, so I invited her in a friendly way to call upon me. She 
 came, and I had one or two other ladies present, for I was not 
 like my husband in that particular — / had no anxiety to be 
 alone with her. My effort to cultivate a friendly feeling 
 towards her was not very successful. There was a coldness 
 and restraint on both sides which we could not overcome, and 
 I felt not a little relief when the evening was over. Subse- 
 quently I renewed the attempt, but to no purpose ; her very 
 presence in my house and among my children seemed in itself 
 an insult to me. 
 
 It was not strange that I should feel thus. Think what the 
 feelings of any wife would be under such circumstances. A 
 family of children was growing up around me. Anxious for 
 their future welfare, I surrounded them with the best influences 
 
44° MY husband's affiance;d wife! 
 
 which I could command, ^nd my constant effort was to traiil 
 them so that they should blush at everything that was not 
 honorable and upright, I had daughters of my own — one of 
 them quite growing up into womanhood. Had my husband 
 been a Gentile, and had he gone astray, his wrong-doing would 
 not have been introduced into my home itself, nor would it 
 have been a subject of conversation among my children. But, 
 under Mormonism how was I situated ? Why, I was compelled 
 to drain the cup of degradation to its very dregS' — the sanctity 
 of my home itself was invaded, and I felt ashamed to think 
 that I — wife and mother as I was — was entertaining my hus- 
 band's affianced "wife" (!) — a child no older than my own 
 eldest girl ; and before long she would be brought home in 
 my presence and among my children! Oh, detestable and 
 unnatural desecration of the sanctity of home! Oh brutal- 
 ising and immoral burlesque upon religious faith ! How could 
 I ever have deluded myself into the idea that such a profanation 
 of all that is good could by any possibility be right, that, such 
 an outrage upon decency and propriety, si^ch a violation of the 
 laws of reason and religion could be pleasing in the sight of 
 an all-pure God ? 
 
 During my husband's absence, my poor friend Carrie Grant 
 had been daily growing worse in health. I had once asked 
 my husband if there was any truth in the rumors that I had 
 heard of his attachment to her, but he had assured me that 
 there was no foundation for them. Subsequently I learned from 
 Carrie's own lips that this was not exactly true. She said he 
 had deceived me for the sake of sparing my feelings, but I did' 
 not appreciate such kindness, Mormonism is full of decep- 
 tions. Men deceive their wives, and in return the wives 
 deceive their husbands; and it is all for the sake of the 
 kingdom of God. 
 
 Poor Carrie! Her's was a short and unhappy life — even 
 her little dream of love was overclouded by disappointment. 
 She was now constantly confined to her room, and whenever 
 it was possible I used to call upon her, and attempted to make 
 her feel more happy and cheerful. She used to ask me to talk 
 
"I AM WEARY WAITING FOR DEATH." 441 
 
 with her about Mormonism. "You know," she said, "that I 
 have never known' any other religion, and I believe that this 
 is right though it does not make me happy. My father loved 
 Mormonism so much that I feel it mmt be right ; the fault is 
 in my own evil nature that does not bend to the will of 
 Heaven." 
 
 One day she said to me: "I am getting worse, Sister 
 Stenhouse, and I am glad of it, tor I shall die. I am of no 
 good here — there is nothing for me to do ; if I lived, I should 
 only cause trouble ;, it is better as it is." 
 
 "Carrie," I said, "You must not talk like that. You are 
 still very young and probably will live for many years, and you 
 do not know what future may lie before you." 
 
 "Do not blame me too much," she replied, for I am not the only 
 'unhappy girl in the city. I know many girls who are very mis- 
 erable. Married women think that they are the only ones who 
 suffer, while we girls know that nowhere upon the face of the 
 earth can be found such an unhappy set as we are. Why did 
 Brigham Young keep nle from going to my friends in the East.' 
 I should have been happier then — I should have felt better. 
 But now I want to die, and I am weary waiting for death." 
 
 In this melancholy mood I found her one day when she 
 appeared particularly sad. She had been ill then about ten 
 ihonths; but her loving blue eyes were just as bright as ever, 
 and I could see very little change in her, except that she was 
 not able now to leave her couch without assistance, and she 
 spoke as if it fatigued her very much. It was quite impossi- 
 ble to arouse her from the state of melancholy into which she 
 had fallen, and it seemed to me that she could not last long. 
 Z offered to take her to my house, and said I would nurse her 
 there and take care of her ; but she said she was very kindly 
 treated by her father's family and did not wish to change. 
 She seemed to cling to me as if she could not bear that I 
 should leave her, and she told me she had something on her 
 mind that troubled her; she wanted to have a long talk vnth 
 mc about it, but not that day* she said. I went home that 
 evening with tears in my eyes. 
 
>J -j?, "INDEED YOU DO LOVE ME." 
 
 As the end was fast approaching, she one day said: "I want 
 to tell you now, Sister Stenhouse, what I spoke of before, if 
 you are willing to listen and will not be angry with anything 
 I say. Remember, I am dying, or I never would speak to you 
 as I am going to." 
 
 I told her of my great love for her, and that nothing that 
 she could say would change that love. 
 
 "You do not know what I want to ask you, or you would 
 not say so," she replied ; "and I so dread to lose your love that 
 I am afraid to tell you what is in my mind. But you know 
 that I am dying and you will not be very hard with me." 
 
 She was then silent for some time, as if too much fatigued 
 to continue the conversation. "No: I cannot tell you to-day," 
 she said at last, " I want you to love me one day longer." 
 
 I urged her not to doubt that my love towards her could 
 never change, and told her that it was better for her to speak 
 at once and relieve her mind. She took my hand, and looked 
 long and tenderly at me, and then she said: "I will tell you 
 all, and if your love can stand that test, then indeed you do 
 love me." 
 
 I encouraged her, and she began: "Would you hate me if I 
 told you that I loved your husband.'" 
 
 "No," I replied, "I would not hate you, Carrie." I said no 
 more, for it seemed to me that it would be wrong of me to tell 
 her of my suspicions and all that I had suffered at the thought 
 that my husband had conceived an affection for her. 
 
 "Can you possibly answer me as calmly as that.'" she said; 
 "I thought that the very mention of such a thing would almost 
 kill you, for I saw how much you loved your husband, and. Ah, 
 how I have suffered at the thought of telling you. But that 
 is not all I wanted to say, or I need never have spoken to you 
 at all. I wanted to ask you to do me one last kindness, and 
 then I think I shall die happy. You know that we have been 
 taught that Polygamy is absolutely necessary to salvation, and 
 if I were to die without being sealed to some man I could not 
 possibly enter the celestial kingdom. My friends wish me to 
 be sealed to one of the authorities of the Church, but I can- 
 
A SOLEMN PROMISE, 443 
 
 not bear the idea of being sealed to a man whom I do not 
 love. I love your husband, and I want you to promise that I 
 shall be sealed to him. If I had thought that I should recover, 
 I never would have let you know thiS) for I would not live to 
 give you sorrow. But, when I am gone, will you kneel by 
 your husband's side in the Endowment House, and be married 
 to him for me? Will it pain you much to do that for me. 
 Sister Stenhouse?" 
 
 I felt so strangely as I listened to all this that I could not 
 utter a single wor^, and she continued: "We shall then be 
 together in eternity, and I am happy at the thought of that, 
 for I think I love you even better than I love him. And then 
 I believe we shall have overcome all our earthly feelings and 
 shall be prepared to live that celestial law, and perhaps we 
 may prefer it, for no doubt we shall know no unhappiness 
 there." 
 
 The exertion of talking seemed to be too much for her, and 
 she remained silent for some time. I felt ashamed that I had 
 allowed my feelings, to influence me at such a moment, for 
 while she had been speaking I had allowed my thoughts to 
 travel back over the past year, and, now that she admitted her 
 love for my husband, very many circumstances came painfully 
 to my recollection and confirmed all that she said. I resolved, 
 however, not to question her, but to allow her to tell me just 
 what she pleased. So I knelt down by her side and whispered 
 into her ear a solemn pVomise that I would do all that she 
 desired. Poor girl : how I felt for her ! When I had givei- 
 her this pledge, she appeared much relieved and told me freely 
 all that had passed between my husband and herself, and she 
 said she had left my house simply because she could not endure 
 to cause me any sorrow. I told her of my husband's contem- 
 plated marriage with Belinda Pratt, and she appeared a good 
 deal troubled at it. "Let me be second," she said, "for then I 
 shall feel that I am nearer to you, and I want you always to 
 think that, when you die, if I have, the power, I. shall be the 
 first to meet you and take you by the hand." 
 
 Thus we talked together for a long time, and it was with 
 
444 HOPING AGAINST HOPE, 
 
 painful interest that I listened to what she said. It was a 
 singular interview; — a wife receiving from a young girl the 
 confession that she loved her husband; that he had fully 
 returned her affection, and had even talked with her about 
 marriage : the girl requesting the wife to be married for her 
 to her own husband, and the wife, full of tender love towards 
 the girl, freely giving her a promise that she would do so. In 
 my sorrow at parting from her, and the great affection that I 
 felt towards her, all feelings of jealousy were utterly forgotten. 
 Before I left I said: "Carrie, whether you live or die, you shaU 
 be married to my husband, if he ever enters into Polygamy ; 
 and I say this although I do not doubt that he will do so, and 
 at the same time I think that you will live." 
 
 I really believed that she might recover ; for now this bur- 
 den was off her mind, I thought she would have strength to 
 subdue her sickness, and at first it seemed as if this would 
 really be the case. The next day she appeared so much 
 better that her friends all became hopeful, and when I told 
 her that I had written to my husband and had told him, that 
 since he had made up his mind to go into Polygamy, I wished 
 him to -marry her, she appeared so happy and showed her joy 
 in so many innocent ways that I could not be angry. 
 
 " How do you think he will feel," she said, " when he gets 
 your letter.'— Do I look pretty well to-day? And do you 
 think that if I continue to get better I shall have regained my 
 looks before he comes home." 
 
 " Oh," I said, humoring her, " You will look quite pretty by 
 the time he returns, I shall be really jealous of you." 
 
 In an instant the thought of how much all mention of her 
 in connection with my husband must be painful to me, occurred 
 to her mind, and she begged me to forgive her for her care- 
 lessness. " No," said she, " I will try never to give you pain, 
 and you must always love me." 
 
 For some days this improvement in her appearance con- 
 tinued, and. I thought, and hoped, that we should soon have 
 her round again. I really wished her to live now, for if it 
 was absolutely necessary that Mr. Stenhouse must practice 
 
BESIDE THE BED OF DEATH. 44? 
 
 Polygamy, I would prefer that, rather than any other woman, 
 he should marry her, for I felt that she would understand me 
 as no. one else could. 
 
 Thus, after all, I really had selected a second wife for my 
 husband ! 
 
 But the change in poor Carrie's looks was altogether 
 deceptive. News came to me one morning that she was very 
 much worse, and I hastened to see her. As I entered the 
 room, her eyes brightened, and she said : " I'm glad that you 
 have come. Sister gtenhouse, for I feel that I am going soon. 
 Then, after a pause, she added, holding up her hands — " Do 
 you know what that means ,' " The finger nails were turning 
 blue. 
 
 "That means death," she saifl ; "and it is better so." 
 After this we conversed together for some time upon various 
 topics of special interest to her in the position in which she 
 then was, and presently she said, as if asking a question, — 
 " You will keep your promise, I know." 
 
 "Carrie," I answered, "if there is anything that I can say 
 or do that will make you feel more certain that I will keep 
 my promise, if I live to do so, tell me, and I will do it." 
 
 " I am afraid," she said, " that, after all, he never loved me. 
 He pitied my lonely situation and was so kind and good to 
 me that I learned to love him, and those, meddlesome sisters 
 tried to get him to marry me, but I would not be false to "you. 
 Then we both thought it was best not to tell you, as it would 
 make you grieve, although it never could take place. Even 
 now, had I not known that I was dying, I never would have 
 told you. But you will not love me less when you think of 
 me after I am gone } " 
 
 I told her that my affection for her would never change, 
 and I talked with her, and tried to soothe her dying moments, 
 and to make her feel less lonely ; and thus the morning passed 
 away. In the afternoon she was sil'ent and apparently uncon^ 
 scious, and before another day dawned she had passed away 
 to her rest. 
 
CHAPTER XXXII. 
 
 MARRIAGE FOR THE DEAD— ENTERING INTO POLYGAMY— 
 
 THE NEW WIFE. 
 • 
 
 Memories of My Poor Friend Carrie — The Last Untroubled Sleep — Her Hopes 
 and Mine — ^Alone in the Night — A Mysterious " Presence " — " I Plainly Saw 
 Carrie Leaning Over Me" — The Wedding- Ring — "The 'Presence' in the 
 Room jVas Gone" — Troubled About the Ring — Beside the Coifin of My 
 Dead Friend — I Place the Ring on Her Finger — My Husband's Gift for 
 Csrrie — "He Considered it was Only a Dream" — Waiting for the Event — 
 The Saddest Day of My Life — My Husband's Second Marriage — I Give 
 Away the Bride ! — Fulfilling My Promise — I Am Married to My Husband ior 
 Carrie — Brigham's Decree : The Claims of the Living and the Dead — Mar- 
 ried for Eternity — The Bride and Bridegroom — After the Wedding — Lone- 
 liness and Grief — A Night of Darkness and Sorrow. 
 
 THE following evening I went round again to the house, to 
 gaze once more at the form of my dear friend. She war 
 lying in her coiifin, dressed for the grave, and 1 looked at her 
 long and tenderly as she rested sleeping there. Her features 
 were peaceful and natural as if in slumber ; an expression of 
 calm tranquility hovered around her countenance, and in the 
 repose of death she seemed almost happy. Poor girl ! her 
 life had been short indeed, and she had known but little 
 pleasure, but I believed that she was now beyond the reach of 
 earthly sorrow and earthly disappointment, happy in that land 
 where suffering and tears are all unknown. " There shall be 
 no night there," the Lord of that other life had said. Sorrow 
 and sighing shall flee away from that bright and glorious land ; 
 
BEYOND THE FLOODS OF DEATH. 447 
 
 and the grief and pain which on earth are the portion of so 
 many tried and weary hearts, shall find no entrance into that 
 eternal rest which our Father in heaven has prepared for us 
 beyond the floods of death. 
 
 Oh, better far, I thought, it is that thus she should pass 
 away. True, she has seen but little of life, and has not tasted 
 many of its joys ; but, as a compensation, how much has she 
 been spared. She was so gentle and so sensitive, so unfit to 
 battle with the stern realities of existence, that I felt she had 
 gained rather than lost in being taken away in the morning 
 of her life. Those anxieties, trials, and cares, which are more 
 or less the portion of every one of us, would never weary her 
 now ; and, especially, she was for ever beyond the reach of 
 those painful thoughts and feelings which are the lot of the 
 Mormon women alone. Certainly, she thought, as also did I, 
 that in that other, future life, after the resurrection, we should 
 live together a life much like that which we lived on earth, 
 only more glorious and happy. We could not marry or be 
 given in marriage in the world to come ; but those who had 
 been united on earth for eternity, whether personally or by 
 proxy, would, in heaven, lead a married life together and fulfil 
 all the duties and obligations of that position. Carrie believed 
 firmly, that if I were sealed to my husband for her, she would 
 be his second wife in heaven ; and the reason why I had 
 promised to be married for her before my husband was united 
 to other wives was, that by so doing, she would rank before 
 all the rest. I, as first wife, would be queen in my husband's 
 kingdom, if I continued faithful and very obedient : Carrie, as 
 second wife, would rank next to me ; and the others who 
 might afterwards be added would be placed according to the 
 date of their marriage. We none of us doubted that all this 
 was true ; and the thought that by her marriage with my hus- 
 band she would be sure of " exaltation " in the celestia,l kingdom 
 had comforted the last hours of my poor friend. 
 
 I was musing sadly over these things as I returned home 
 that evening, resolved that nothing on my part should be left 
 undone which might ensure her future happiness, and I pre- 
 
448 / ALONE AT NIGHT. 
 
 sume that in toy mind her death, and the promise which I had 
 made, were the all-absorbing thoughts. Certain it is' that a 
 little incident occurred to me, which produced a vivid impres- 
 sion upon my mind, then and for a long time after. I believed 
 that I was visited by my departed friend. 
 
 Now, I was not naturally superstitious, and I would not, on 
 any account, have the reader think that I was a believer in the 
 very extraordinary claims of modern Spiritualism. At the 
 time of which I speak, I knew absolutely nothing of the 
 " manifestations " and " communications " received at stances 
 — I had, in fact, been so isolated, and was so ignorant of the 
 doings of the world in general, that I had never even heard of 
 such things. I certainly did not believe that apparitions of 
 the dead returned to trouble us with communications of any 
 kind ; but, nevertheless, I was that night convinced that 
 Carrie's spirit stood beside me, and spoke to me, just as in life 
 she might herself have done. Even now, after the lapse of 
 several years, I hardly know what to think of the ipatter, for 
 it made such a powerful impression on my mind. Probably 
 it was all a dream — a vivid and life-like dream, but nothing 
 more. The reader will remember that at the time I was in a 
 very delicate condition of health, my mind was quite unsettled 
 with trouble and anxiety, and for some time past my thoughts 
 had been constantly fixed upon poor Carrie and her sad fate. 
 These circumstances combined might perhaps have shaped 
 my ideas and raised up before me that strange vision. To 
 me, however, at the time, it had all the force of reality ; and 
 ^yhile I leave it to the reader's common-sense to determine 
 what really were the facts of the case, I think I should not be 
 justified in altogether omitting an incident so singular, which, at 
 such a critical period of my life, so strongly affected me. 
 
 I was sitting alone in my, room, and reading, when suddenly 
 I felt as if some one had opened the door and entered, and I 
 looked round to see who it was. I felt a " Presence," if I 
 may so speak, but I saw no one. So, thinking that I was 
 nervous, and resolved to control ttiy feelings, I took up my 
 book again and tried to interest myself in it. A few minutesf 
 
THE "PRESENCE IN MY ROOM. 449 
 
 elapsed, and then I was startled again, for I felt sure that 
 some one was leaning over me, and I seemed almost to hear 
 them breathe. 
 
 Quite certain now that the events of the preceding day had 
 unsettled my mind, I laid aside my book and prepared to 
 retire for the night. But still I could not get rid of that 
 feeling which we all experience when some one is near us 
 whom we cannot see but of whose presence we are instinct- 
 ively aware. After disrobing, I lay down and began to read 
 until I was sleepy ; I then turned down the light, without 
 entirely extinguishing it, when, immediately after, .the " Pre- 
 sence" seemed to stand beside my bed, and I lost all power 
 over myself. I was not, I believed, asleep, but at the, same 
 time I did not seem to be perfectly awake. But the 
 " Presence " was now no longer invisible — I plainly saw Carrie 
 leaning over me. 
 
 " Is that you, Carrie .'" I said. 
 
 " Yes," she answered, or seemed to answer, " I want some- 
 thing from you." Then pointing to a gold ring upon my 
 finger — not my wedding ring, though it was a wedding ring 
 — she said : " I want you to give me that ring." 
 
 " You shall have it," I answered ; and she then bent over 
 me and kissed my cheek. I distinctly felt the coldness of 
 her lips as she touched me ; and in another instant she was 
 gone. 
 
 I was wide awake, but trembling, and cavered with a cold 
 perspiration, for I felt certain that Carrie's spirit had been 
 with me, and now that she had spoken to me I felt that 
 the " Presence " in the room was gone. I could sleep no 
 more, although all fear had left me, and I lay awake 
 for hours thinking over the matter and trying to explain it 
 away. 
 
 In the morning, I persuaded myself that it was all a dream 
 or the effects of a disturbed imagination ; but as I had prom- 
 ised — whether dreaming or awake it mattered little— to give 
 her the ring, I resolved to keep my word and put it on her 
 finger secretly as she lay in her cofSn. With that intention I 
 
450 POOR CARRIES RING. 
 
 went to the house,, some time before the funeral was appointed 
 to take place, but, as there was constantly some one in, the 
 room, I felt ashamed to carry out my purpose, lest they should 
 think me silly to do such a thing. 
 
 As the time approached when they should carry her to the 
 grave, I became so troubled about the ring that I could not 
 rest, so I went into another room where one of Brigham 
 Young's' wives, and a plural wife of Carrie's father, were 
 talking together ; and I told them of my dream ; for so I 
 called the vision of my dead friend, although it seemed to 
 me reality. 
 
 They urged me to lose no time but to go instantly and put 
 the ring on the finger of the corpse. " If you do not," they 
 said, " You will never feel happy ; she will never rest, but 
 will be sure to come back to reproach you." So I went and 
 did as they said. Without any one noticing me, I stood beside 
 the casket, and raised the beautiful hand which looked so pure 
 and wax-like, but oh, so cold ! — and I placed the ring on the 
 wedding finger, and then covered it with the other hand. 
 Then again, beside the dead body of my friend, I vowed to be 
 faithful to the promise that I had made to her ; and after that 
 I felt at peace. 
 
 Not long subsequently to this, my husband returned home. 
 The following morning he took from his pocket a very beauti- 
 ful ring which he presented to me, asking me to wear it for 
 his sake. Directly after, he held up another — a plain gold ' 
 ring — and asked me if I knew who that was for. I thought 
 that I knew, for, as he was soon to be married to Miss Pratt, I 
 supposed it was for her. My pride, however, would not allow 
 me to say so. I therefore simply replied that I did not know, 
 feeling, at the same time, very much inclined to add, " You 
 had better give this one with it, whoever it is for ;" for I 
 thought it unkind of him to show Belinda's ring to me. 
 
 I was silent, however, and he then said: " This one I bought 
 for Carrie when I received your letter." 
 
 " Then I shall have to wear it now," I said ; and then I 
 told him all that I have just related, but I think he con- 
 
THE TIME APPROACHING. 45 1 
 
 sidered it was only a dream or the fancy of a troubled imag- 
 ination. 
 
 I now expected very soon to be called upon to undergo the 
 most painful ordeal that any wife can be required to pass 
 through : I was to give my husband another wife — such is 
 the sacrifice demanded of every Mormon woman. 
 
 The thought of doing this was worse than death to me. I 
 felt injured, humiliated and degraded by it, and yet I still tried 
 to believe that it was the will of God, and must therefore be 
 right. To me, this outrage upon all the purest feelings of 
 womanhood seemed more like the will of men — men of the 
 basest and most unholy passions. It was repulsive to me in 
 whatever form it was presented, but still I reproached my own 
 rebellious heart for feeling so, for I had been told that the 
 ways of the Lord were past finding out, and however unlike 
 Him this Revelation rnight appear, we Mormon women 
 had been taught that it was our duty to bend our wills 
 and to suffer in unquestioning and uncomplaining silence. 
 
 As the time approached, I felt like a condemned criminal 
 awaiting the day of execution. A sense of apprehension, a 
 dread of coming evil, was ever present to my mind, and every- 
 thing appeared to me through the medium of my griefs. To a 
 certain extent, ray husband also suffered, for it would be im- 
 possible, I think, for any man to see his wife sufEering so 
 intensely without feeling for her, and I sometimes believed 
 that his sympathy for me was so great, that, if he had dared, he 
 would even then have refused to obey the counsel of the 
 Priesthood. 
 
 Then, too, he had a little trouble of his own, for he began 
 to realise that this innovation upon the sanctity of our home 
 would make a great change in his future — his freedom woidd 
 be gone. 
 
 However gratifying it may be to a man's feelings to know 
 that there is no limit to his privileges,.and that he is always at 
 liberty — no matter how many wives he may already possess — 
 to fall in love with every pretty girl he meets, and marry her 
 
453 THAT DAY. 
 
 if she consents ; yet every inteUigent man must be conscious 
 that it can be no easy matter to keep peace between many 
 wives in one house, and that, if he wishes to act rightly by all, 
 he must train himself to be scrupulously just, never showing 
 any partiality in look or deed/ or even by a word. There are 
 many such men among the Mormons. They are conscien- 
 tious and good men, who try to live their religion, but who at 
 the same time desire to act kindly towards their wives. My 
 husband bfegan to realise the great responsibility that he was 
 about to take upon himself, and seeing his thoughtful and 
 troubled look, I tried to hide my own feelings ; for every true 
 •wife knows that nothing so powerfully arouses a woman to' 
 struggle with her own sorrows as the knowledge that her hus- 
 band is unhappy. 
 
 The dreaded day at length arrived, the day which for so' 
 long, and with such painful forebodings, I had anticipated. I 
 had spent a very wakeful and unhappy night, and felt very 
 sick and nervous, for I was about to become a mother, and my 
 health was anything but strong. I hardly felt as if I shoilld 
 have courage to go through that day. I was, however, com- 
 pelled to nerve myself to the task, and I began to make my 
 preparations for going to the Endowment House. The only 
 thing that gave me strength was the thought that my husband 
 had consented that I should go through the ceremony of being 
 married to him that day for Carrie ; for even then I supposed 
 that those who would be married in heaven must first be mar- 
 ried on earth, and that, too, by those who had received author- 
 ity from on high. 
 
 -Ever since I had, first embraced Mormonism I had been 
 entirely cut off from Gentile society, although living in the 
 Gentile world. Abroad, and also when in New York, the 
 cares of a family kept me very much at home, and the con- 
 tinual state of apprehension in which I was, rendered me 
 averse t6 visiting among friends. Thus it was that I never 
 conversed freely with any one who could have informed me 
 truthfully of the origin of Mormonism, and Consequently I 
 brooded over my religion as a melancholy fact ; but, though 
 
MY HUSBANDS SECOND MARRIAGE. 4S3 
 
 with moments of weakness and wavering, I never thoroughly 
 doubted its divine origin. The terrible sacrifice which was 
 about to be required of me, might, J thought, be painful to 
 msJte, but it was no less the will of God, I must submit, 
 whatever the effort might cost me. 
 
 The mprning was bright and lovely — a morning calculated 
 to inspire happy hopes and pleasant feelings ; but to me 
 it t>rought nothing but fea;r and trembling, Even the innocent 
 prattle of my children annoyed me, and they not knowing how 
 deeply I was suffering looked at me with wonder in their eyes. 
 Qh, I thought, surely my husband wilj at length comprehend 
 the greatness of the love I bear him ; surely he will now.appre- 
 ciate the sacrifice I make for his sake and for my religion, 
 pven now, if I did not know that he believes this doctrine to be 
 true, and he would feel condemned if, through any opposition 
 of mine, he were not allowed to practice . , I would at the last 
 moment dash this bitter cup from my lips and take ray chancy 
 of the consequences in a future state ! 
 
 l/tterly cast down and broken-hearted, I felt almost as if 
 the Lord himself had forsaken me, and there was no one to 
 whom I could look for aid. I could not go to my husband in 
 that hour for sympathy ; for I well knew that his thoughts 
 must be with his intended bride, aod that my sorrows would 
 only trouble him at a time when he must desire to be at peace. 
 Resides which, I was too proud to plead for love at a shrine 
 that I felt should rightfully be all my own, And then, too, 
 I knew not but what he might tell /lef of my feelings ; and it 
 would be too great a humiliation for me should she think me 
 jealous of the position which she now occupijed, and her influ- 
 ence over my husband. 
 
 With such feelings I went to the Endowment House. 
 There at the altar I was to give proof of my obedience and of 
 my faith' in my religion, by placing the hand of the new wife 
 in that of my husband. The thought was almost madness. 
 To have followed my husband to the grave would have beej^i 
 a terrible blow to me ; but to live to see him the husband of 
 another woman was something that seemed to me beyopd en- 
 28 
 
454 "FOR ALL ETERNITY. 
 
 durance. Notwithstanding every effort; of faith, doubts 
 would arise, and in bitterest anguish I thought — this is more 
 like the work of cruel man than of God. Why should man 
 have this power over woman, and she so helpless ? Surely a 
 just and impartial God can have nothing to do with this ! 
 There was a darkness before my eyes, and struggle as I might, 
 I could see no ray of light. No glimmering of hope. 
 
 First, my husband was married to Miss Pratt ; and then to 
 me for Carrie. Thus I fulfilled my pledge to my departed 
 friend. Later in the day, I placed the ring which my husband 
 had bought for her upon my finger, instead of the one which I 
 had put on her wedding-finger in the coffin. I shall always 
 wear it in remembrance of her, although among the Mormons 
 at that time wedding-rings were never thought of, and to this 
 day are only used by the more educated and refined who cling 
 to Gentile customs. I had found before going to the Endow- 
 ment House that I could not have Carrie sealed to my hus- 
 band next to me, for Belinda had objected, and her mother 
 had appealed to Brigham Young about it. They told me that 
 he had said that the living had claims before the dead, although 
 my own feelings would have led me to think otherwise. Brig- 
 ham Young performed the ceremony. He sat at the end of 
 the altar and we three knelt down — my husband on one side 
 and Miss Pratt and myself on the other. Speaking to me, 
 Brigham Young asked : "Are you willing to give this woman 
 to your husband to be his lawful wife for time and for all 
 eternity ? If you are you will signify it by placing her right 
 hand within the right hand of your husband." 
 
 I did so ; but what words can describe my feelings ! The 
 anguish of a whole lifetime was crowded into that one single 
 moment. The painful meaning, of those words, "for all 
 eternity'' withered my soul, and the unending contract which 
 my husband had made with another woman was practically a 
 divorce from me. I had now laid everything upon the altar 
 of sacrifice, for I had given away my husband. What more 
 could the Lord require of me that I was not prepared to do ? 
 
 I was bewildered and almost beside myself, and yet I had 
 
AFTER THE MARRIAGE: — HOME. 457 
 
 to hide my feelings. Hope was for ever banished from my 
 life. To whom could I look for sympathy among those who 
 were around me .' They were most' of them men who had 
 ruthlessly wrecked the lives and lacerated the hearts of hun- 
 dreds of women before my turn came, and the sight of an 
 unhappy wife was so common in their experience that it was 
 more likely to awaken their anger than their pity. I felt this 
 instinctively, and I resolved that they should never know how 
 much my poor heart was torn. My husband, it is true, was 
 there. My husbaq^ ! Was he not now the husband of an- 
 other woman, and, therefore, no longer belonging to me. I 
 knew that I never could overcome my early teaching suffi- 
 ciently to feel that this was right, though, such was my wretched 
 fanaticism, that I mentally and verbally assented to it. I felt 
 that now I stood alone — our union was severed. There could 
 never be any copartnership between that other wife and my- 
 self — no, never. Salvation or no salvation, it was impossible 
 that I could ever love her. From that day I began to hide all 
 my sorrows from my husband, and it was but very seldom that 
 1 1 uttered a word of discontent, and when I expressed what I 
 felt, it was in anger ; but never in sorrow, seeking sympathy. 
 
 I remember when we returned home — that home which had 
 now lost its charm, for the young wife was to live there — my 
 husband said to me : " You have been very brave, but it is not 
 so hard to bear, after all, is it.'" I had hidden my feelings so 
 well that he really thought that I was indifferent. But during 
 the remainder of the day how I watched their looks and noticed 
 every word ! To me their tender tones were daggers, piercing 
 my heart and filling me with a desire to revenge myself upon 
 the father of my children. Oh, what tanatics we Mormon 
 women have been ever to have believed for a single moment 
 that a just and loving Father and God would have given a 
 command that in almost every instance has produced such 
 fearful results upon those who should have been happy wives 
 and mothers, and consequently upon their children. Indeed, 
 even then it made me feel that there was no justice in heiven, 
 if this love which is the best part of woman's nature — this 
 
458 THAT NIGHT. 
 
 love that we had always believed was a part of divinity itself 
 — this principle, without which there would be nothing worth 
 living for — if this had been made our greatest curse, and the 
 woman who showed herself most actuated by this gentle in- 
 fluence was to be the greatest victim. 
 
 I felt that day that if I could not get away by myself alone, 
 and give expression to my overcharged feelings, I should cer- 
 tainly lose my reason. I was utterly miserable. It was only 
 in the dead of night, in my own chamber, that I gave way to 
 the terrible anguish that was consuming me. God and my 
 own soul can alone bear witness to what I suffered in that 
 time of woe. That night was to me such as even the most 
 God-forsaken might pray never to know ; and morning dawned 
 without my having for a moment closed my eyes. 
 
CHAPTER XXXIII. 
 
 DOMESTIC ARRANGEMENTS OF THE SAINTS :— POLYGAMY 
 FROM A WOMAN'S STANDPOINT. 
 
 A First Wife's Experience in Polygamy — "Getting Used to it" — The Doings 
 and Devices of Polygamic Wives — How Mormon Men Deceive and are De- 
 ceived — Feminine Drill-Sergeants — The Ladies who advocate Polygamy ! — A 
 Present for Brother Brigham — Getting up a Petition — How Signatures are 
 Procured — Inscribing the Names of the Dead as Voters — Cruel efforts of 
 Hopeless Women — A Mormon idea of a Husband's Duty — The Domestic 
 Arrangements of the Saitits — A Man with Six Wives — How he Divides his 
 Time — A Crafty Proceeding — The Reward of Generosity — Primitive Habita- 
 tions — Polygamy in the Rough — The Discarded Wife in the Wagon-Box — 
 " Build up the Kingdom ! " — Four Wives and their Children in One Room — 
 Advantages of a Large House — Wealthy Polygamists — Married to Two Sis- 
 tets' — Marrying a Step-Daughter — Managing a Husband — The Influence o£ 
 Good Cookery^Wives in Various Settlements^The Case Reversed: A 
 icture. 
 
 I WAS now to realise personally in my own home life what 
 Polygamy actually was. Hitherto I had observed how 
 other women suffered and how other men treated their wives ; 
 but now the painful reality had come to my own door, and I was 
 to experience the effects of the system upon myself, and in- 
 stead of noting the conduct of other men I should be able to 
 observe the change which Polygamy might work in my own 
 husband. 
 
 How little do the Mormon men know what it is in the truest 
 sense to have a wife, though they have so many " wives " after 
 their own fashion. Almost imperceptibly to the husband, and 
 even to the wife herself, a barrier rises between them from the 
 
460 DIVIDED INTERESTS, 
 
 very day that he marries another woman. It matters not how 
 much she believes in the doctrine of plural marriage, or how 
 willing she may be to submit to it ; the fact remains the same. 
 The estrangement begins by her trying to hide from him all 
 her secret sorrows ; for she feels that what has been done can- 
 not be undone now, and she says, " I cannot change it ; neither 
 would I if I could, because it is the will of God, and I must 
 bear it ; besides, what good will it do to worry my husband 
 with all my feelings .' He cannot help me ; and is he not an- 
 •other woman's husband .' " Then comes, perhaps, the painful 
 thought, " I have no longer any desire to confide in him." Or 
 it may be that. she detects some familiarity between her hus- 
 band and the other wife ; and she feels bitterly towards both, 
 for strive ' as she may, human nature cannot be altogether 
 crushed out. 
 
 Before long the wife begins to feel her husband's presence 
 itself become irksome to her — even his touch makes her shud- 
 der. She strives to hide all this ; but, oh, with what anguish of 
 soul! She may keep up an appearance of tranquility, and 
 when spoken to about plural marriage may lead people to 
 believe that she is happy, and even her own husband may 
 think that she has become " used to it ; " but women never 
 " get used to it " until they have in a great measure, or perhaps 
 entirely, lost their love for their husbands. 
 
 This was a mistake that my own husband made, in respect to 
 me. He realised, I know — as much as the generality of men 
 ever can realise of a woman's feelings — that I was suffering 
 intensely, and he tried in every way to make my burden 
 lighter. But, like his brethren, he thought that, because he 
 was getting used to it, I was also. I can truly say I never did 
 get used to it, and never could. 
 
 That was a time of great misery to me, much as I tried to 
 control my feelings. Day by day I strove to hide from my 
 heart even the knowledge of my own unhappiness, and when 
 I could no longer endure, I would lock myself in my room and 
 give vent to the anguish that was consuming me. 1 realised, 
 however, that this continual conflict of feeling was unfitting 
 
EFFECTS OF POLYGAMY. 461 
 
 me for my duties. Everything was becoming a trial to me. I 
 could not bear to be spoken to ; the prattle of my children 
 that had always been so dear to me, was now discordant to my 
 feelings ; and all their little questionings' were irksome. I de- 
 termined that this should no longer be the case ; I would bat- 
 tle with my own heart ; I would henceforth devote my whole 
 life — worthless as that life appeared to have become — to the 
 welfare of my little ones. This was a conclusion that hun- 
 dreds of wretched Mormon wives have arrived at, and when 
 this is the case there is some hope for them. But many give 
 way to despair, and go down broken-hearted to their graves. 
 
 How much of true affection do the Mormon husbands lose! 
 A man may have a dozen wives ; but from them all combined 
 he will not receive as much real love and devotion as he would 
 from one alone, if he made her feel that she had his undivided 
 affection and confidence. How terribly these men deceive 
 themselves! When peace, or rather quiet, reigns in their 
 homes, they think that the Spirit of God is there. But it is 
 not so. It is a calm not like the gentle silence of sleep, but 
 as the painful stillness of death — the death of the heart's best 
 affection and all that is worth calling love. All true love has 
 fled, and indifference has taken its place. The very children 
 feel it. What do they, what can they, care about their father, 
 whom they so seldom see ? Of course, as in everything else, 
 there are exceptions to the rule ; but I am speaking now of 
 Polygamists in general. 
 
 Some wives, afraid of creating a prejudice against themselves 
 and of being forsaken altogether, deceive their husbands, and 
 make them believe that they are satisfied. It must be admit- 
 ted .that, in acting thus, these wives are not always actuated 
 by a fear of losing the society or love' of their husbands, for, 
 in Polygamy, love dies a natural death ; but it is galling to a 
 woman's pride to have it said that she has been cast off for 
 another. Then, too — and some women would consider this 
 the most important reason of all— the best provision is 
 usually made for the home where the husband stops most fre- 
 quently; and the wife, if not for her own sake, at least for her 
 
4^2 THE "female relief SOCIETY." 
 
 children's, will be anxious to have a well-provided house. 
 This is only natural. The "divine" plan has always been 
 Worked out in a very human way. 
 
 When a man has several wives, there iS, of course, no 
 necessity for him to stay with an unhappy or mopish one, as 
 he can always find a more pleasant reception elsewhere. Men 
 who can really believe that Women are satisfied and happy 
 under such a system must be entirely ignorant of human 
 nature. And yet I have known maily gentlemen from Utah 
 who, when asked how the MorrrlcJn women submitted to Poly-^ 
 gamy, have answered: "Oh, very well. They are perfectly 
 happy, for they look upon it as a religious duty, and are satisfied 
 and contented with it." 
 
 How false is all this! What an incorrect idea does it give 
 of the wives of Utah ! Some of these very men, to my cer- 
 tain knowledge, know better than this, and have had a very 
 different experience in their own families. I have in my mind 
 a prominent man from Salt Lake City, who told a reporter of 
 the New York Herald how happily his own wives lived 
 together, while every one at home knows that they could not 
 well be more miserable, for his wives do not wear the mask. 
 I could name many other families in which it is just the same. 
 
 There is a class of women in Utah who act as a sort of 
 drill-sergeants to the other women ; these form what is called 
 "The Female Relief Society;" they take the lead among the 
 Mormon women, get up memorials to Congress against anti- 
 Polygamic bills, and otherwise spend their time in advancing 
 the interests of the " Celestial Order." To the good brethren 
 these ladies are invaluable helpers when they desire to add to 
 the number of their wives ; and going from house to house to 
 gather contributions for the Society, they have ample oppor- 
 tunities for discpvering the feelings of those who are rebellious, 
 and giving a great deal of "counsel"' which frequently produces 
 very painful results. The membets of this Relief Society-^ 
 even the poorest — are, without exception, expected to contrib- 
 ute to its funds — if it be only a skein of yarti or a spool of 
 thread. They make their visits fortnightly, and gather in 
 
A PRESENT FOR BROTHER BRIGHAM. 463 
 
 contributions virith such success that in more than one ward 
 they have been able to build a fine store, have filled it with 
 goods, and have had a surplus in hand, which was duly handed 
 over as a present to Brother Brigham. Brother Brigham is 
 always ready and willing to receive gifts, whether large or 
 small. There was an instance of this which fell un^er my 
 own observation, and which, though I was still in the Church, 
 ailhoyed me very greatly. An old lady applied to me for sew- 
 ing, and, as I was in need of some one, I employed her. She 
 suffered a good deal from asthma, and finally became s.. bad 
 that it was with the greatest difficulty that she could even 
 walk. She told me fi'equently that a cup of tea was " such a 
 coittf ort to her ;" but she would not allow herself that luxury, 
 as she was resolved to put by all that it might have cost her 
 for tea, and sugar, and other little luxuries, and make a present 
 0f the money to Brother Brigham. I learned subsequently 
 that she did save up as much as ;^20, which, in the preSenc'e 
 of witnesses, she presented to the Prophet — and he actually 
 took it! I was told that in a sermon delivered at Ogden, a 
 Short time after, he gave the poor woman great credit for hav- 
 ing performed a good deed, and recommended others to go 
 and do likewise ! 
 
 it is difficult to discover how, the poor are benefited by the 
 Relief Society, and yet it was ostensibly for their welfare and 
 assistance that the Society was called into existence. I know 
 of many instances where poor persons have applied for help, 
 which has either been refused them, or else has been offered 
 in such a way that it could not be accepted. 
 
 It must not be supposed that all the Mormon women who 
 belong to the Relief Society are as great admirers of Brother 
 Brigham as the ancient dame of whom I have just spoken. 
 Some belong to it because they cannot help themselves. Ons 
 of these very sisters once told me that when they got up the 
 ladies' petition to Mrs. Grant, praying her to use her influence 
 with the President in favor of Mormon husbands practicing 
 Polygamy, they did not give themselves the trouble to call 
 upon all the ladies who belonged to the Society, but took their 
 
464 THE SIGNATURE OF THE DEAD. 
 
 names from the books, without even obtaining permission first. 
 Another lady told me that when they came to her house to get 
 the signature of herself and daughters, they asked her if she 
 had any dead daughters, as, if she had, it was just as proper to 
 sign for them as for the living, for they would be certain to 
 believe in Polygamy now they were in heaven, whatever might 
 have been their condition on earth. This is the way in which 
 elections are conducted, and memorials and petitions are got 
 up in Utah. 
 
 Moreover, it must not be imagined that those who are most 
 zealous in signing petitions and forcing them upon their sisters, 
 are necessarily the greatest believers in the " Celestial Order." 
 No ; in not a few of these women are seen some of the worst 
 effects of the system. One of these very ladies told me that 
 she had "seen enough of old Brigham and Polygamy in this 
 world, she hoped she would never set eyes on him in the 
 next." And yet this lady was very highly spoken of for her 
 zeal in getting up the petition in favor of Polygamy. These 
 are the women who, finding their own happiness wrecked, are 
 not satisfied until they have dragged every other woman they 
 meet with into the same snare. They appear to have no 
 mercy upon their own sex, and when persuasive words fail to 
 soften the " rebellious " wife they will repeat to her that portion 
 of the "Revelation" which says that the wife who refuses 
 consent shall be destroyed ; and thus they work upon her fears 
 aild her devotion to her religion. It is painful to see women 
 so hopeless themselves that they find a satisfaction in making 
 others equally miserable. 
 
 An utter disregard to the feelings or happiness of individ- 
 uals is one of the distinguishing features of Mormonism.: 
 Polygamy hardens the hearts of both men and women towards 
 those whom they should love most tenderly; what wonder 
 then that the less sacred ties of friendship and common 
 humanity should be disregarded .■• " Do I not furnish you with 
 breadstuffs.?" the wealthy Bishop or Apostle has often said to 
 a neglected wife, "what more do you want.'" She had per- 
 haps complained of neglect, but his coarse nature could not 
 
DOMESTIC ARRANGEMENTS IN POLYGAMY. 465 
 
 comprehend that her soul craved its daily food as much as her 
 body — that a true-hearted wife needs the love and compan- 
 ionship of her husband ; and that she ought to feel that he is 
 living for her and for her children, just as faithfully as she is 
 living for him. 
 
 Any idea of mutual obligation between husbands and wives 
 has, I believe, never entered the mind of Brigham Young and 
 the leaders who most nearly imitate him. He himself has 
 forsaken wife after wife, giving them no love, no companion- 
 ship ; nay, scarcely even a thought. They have gone out of 
 his life as complefely as if they had never possessed the 
 slightest interest in his eyes. He has, however, continued to 
 give them " breadstuff s," clothing and shelter, which he could 
 so well afford ; but it was for appearance sake, and certainly 
 not for love. 
 
 When a man has more than one wife, his affections must of 
 necessity be divided ; he really has no home in the truest sense 
 of the word ; his houses are simply boarding-places. Should 
 he have all his wives in one house, as is often the case, they 
 are then all slaves to the system, each one is watching the 
 others — and they know it — trying to discover something that 
 can be secretly told to the husband to draw away his affections 
 from the rest. What more miserable position could be 
 imagined ? 
 
 There is, however, no fixed principle regulating Mormon 
 men in the management of their families — every one is at lib- 
 erty to do as he thinks best, and scarcely two families are 
 governed alike. When Salt Lake City was first settled, the 
 people had to live as best they could, and a man was glad to 
 get even one roof under which he and all his wives might be 
 sheltered. Now, when the husband is wealthy he generally 
 provides separate homes for his wives. Some wealthy men, 
 however, still have all their wives and families together. 
 
 I have in my mind, as I write, a very prominent Mormon, 
 who has half a dozen wives ; and he divides his time among 
 them after this fashion. The first week he stays with the first 
 wife; the next week he is with the second; then he goes back 
 
466 THE WIFE IN THE WAGON-BOX. 
 
 to the first. The fourth week he passes with the third wife; 
 then he returns for another week to the first. And thus he 
 continues to give one week to the first wife, and the next to 
 one 6f the other five in turn, until he has blessed them all 
 with his presence. Now, it would at a casual glance appear 
 that this first wife has by far the largest share of her hus- 
 band's society; but if the truth must be told, it must be 
 adrftitted that the husband is not quite So generous as he 
 appears. The last wife of this good man is a young and pretty 
 girl, and she lives with the first wife, and thus his devotion to 
 the latter is rewarded by the presence of the former. Each 
 of the other wives has one week of his society and attentions 
 in every eleven — about five weeks apiece of companionship 
 with their husband in the course of a whole year. Other men 
 with the same number of wives pass constantly between one 
 house and another ; they can never be found when wanted ; 
 their lives are one eternal round, and they may be said to have 
 no real abiding place. 
 
 In every settlement in Utah,- long, low-roofed houses may- 
 be seen with a row of doors and Windows alternating. Even 
 in Salt Lake City, much as it h^is changed of late years,' such 
 houses may still be found. To every door and window there 
 is, of course, a wife ; and the furniture of her room consists 
 of a bed, three chairs, and a table. Then, if the man is a very 
 devout Mormon and wishes to increase his kingdom by adding 
 another wife to the inhabitants of the long many-doored house, 
 a wagon-box is so arranged as to form, a sleeping apartnieiit 
 for tbe new comer; or, what is more likely, one of the old 
 wives is put into the wagon-box, and the new one takes her 
 place. 
 
 A house with two wings is rather a favorite style with those 
 men, who, to silence their conscience and the priesthood, con- 
 clude to take "just one extra wife," and no more. The wives, 
 with their children, occupy, respectively, each a wing ; and the 
 entrance-door opens into a parlor, which serves as. a recep- 
 tion-room for both families. The husband in this case spends 
 a week on one side of the house and a week on the other. 
 
BUILDING UP THE "KINGDOM." 467 
 
 alternately ; and thus, by an impartial division of his attentions, 
 he preserves peace in his family, A man who is comfortably 
 off can, of course, arrange his domestic affairs so as to avoid, 
 as far as is possible, th? inconveniences of the system, but ,a 
 poor man is forced to submit to circumstances. Many merj 
 have entered into Polygamy, with two, three, and even four 
 wives, all, with their children, living together under one rocrf 
 — in one roomr-rln the most disgraceful and barbarous 
 manner ; but evei;! for this the leaders were really more to 
 blame than the poor deluded men themselves ; for the com- 
 mand to " Build up the Kingdom ! — build up the Kingdom !" 
 — in other words, take many wives and raise up large families 
 — has been so constantly and imperatively insisted upon 
 that good sense and propriety have at last been entirely 
 overlooked. 
 
 In a very large house, with many wives, there is greater 
 safety and peace for the husband than in a small house with 
 only two wives. When there are only two apartments, th? 
 husband, if not in one is supposed to be in the other, and th^ 
 neglected wife frequently ejfpresses her opinion of her rival JJJ 
 the opposite room in very powerful language. Scenes may be 
 witnessed in such households which are too shocking to dis- 
 close. Brigham Young was conscious of this when he §qid 
 he " would stand no more fighting and scratching around 
 him" ; and yet, in the face of all this, he dares to tell the people 
 that this is the " Order of Celestial Marriage." With many 
 wives living together in a large house there are many adyanr 
 tages. The whereabouts of the husband is not so easily dis- 
 covered, and the unhappy or jealous wife is at a loss to know 
 upon whom to vent her ire. On this account even men with 
 small means prefer to have three wives instead of two, as each 
 wife, not knowing which of the other two she ought to hate 
 the most, divides her jealousy. It takes, however, a wise man 
 to know how to live in Polygamy, so as to balance all the con- 
 flicting interests and obtain a little peace, if happiness is out 
 of the question. 
 Where the husband is a rich man and has abundant wealth 
 
468 HORRORS OF THE SYSTEM. 
 
 wherewith to supply the wants of his numerous wives and 
 children, and to furnish all the necessary accommodation that 
 a growing family demands, much of the jealousy and ill-feel- 
 ing inseparable from , Polygamy can, to a certain extent, be 
 avoided. But when poor men, as I myself have witnessed, 
 live with several wives and a whole army of children, hud- 
 dled together in a miserable room or two, it is painful and 
 inconvenient in the extreme. And yet such is frequently the 
 case. I know one man, otherwise very respectable, who lives 
 with three wives and eleven children in two wretched rooms 
 no better than a stable, and they think that in this they are 
 pleasing God. 
 
 Some men have entered into Polygamy so poor and unpro- 
 vided for that their dwelling consisted of just one sitting room 
 and one sleeping apartment, for the two wives together with 
 the husband ; and it is quite a common' thing to see two or 
 even three wives living together in one very small house. A 
 family was pointed out to me, which consisted of two wives, 
 one son about sixteen years of age, a daughter of fifteen, and 
 numerous other younger children ; and all lived together in 
 two small rooms and a shed. 
 
 It would be quite impossible, with any regard to proprietyj 
 to relate all the horrible results of this disgraceful system; It 
 has debased the minds, and degraded the lives, of good and 
 honest men and women, while those who naturally had a ten- 
 dency towards evil have become a hundred times worse. Mar- 
 riages have been contracted between the nearest relatives; 
 and old men tottering on the brink of the grave hgve.been 
 united to little girls scarcely in their teens ; while unnatural 
 alliances of every description, which in any other community 
 would be regarded with disgust and abhorrence, are here 
 entered into in the name of God, and under the sanction 
 of a " Revelation " supposed to proceed from the pure and 
 holy Saviour. 
 
 I was much shocked and disgusted when first I went to 
 Utah, to"^ find a man whom under other circumstances I had 
 known in London, living with two sisters whom he had mar- 
 
MARRYING A WIDOW AND HER DAUGHTER! 469 
 
 tied in the manner I have just described, and, strange as it 
 may appear, it was not with them a matter of necessity. When 
 I knew the husband in Europe, I considered him a man of 
 education and refinement, but I certainly was mistaken, for no 
 man whose nature was at all sensitive would have lived as he 
 did. His wives, too, who had been considered highly respec- 
 table English girls, were not ashamed of their degraded posi- 
 tion — they professed to believe in bringing the world back to 
 its primitive purity and innocence. 
 
 It is quite a conynon thing in Utah for a man to marry two 
 and even three sisters. I was well acquainted with one man 
 who married his half-sister; and I know several who have 
 married mother and daughter. I know also another man who 
 married a widow with several children ; and when one of the 
 girls had grown into her teens he insisted on marrying her 
 also, having first by some means won her affections. The 
 mother, however, was much opposed to this marriage, and 
 finally gave up her husband entirely to her daughter ; and to 
 this very day the daughter bears children to her "step-father, 
 living as wife in the same house with her mother ! 
 
 In another instance, a well-known man in Salt Lake City, 
 who has several wives and married daughters, married a young 
 girl of fifteen years of age whom his wife had adopted and 
 brought up as her own. 
 
 Men who do such things as these have no excuse in their 
 religion. It is pretended that the Mormon Prophet received a 
 Revelation sanctioning Polygamy, but no one ever supposed 
 that it was therefore necessary for persons so near, akin in 
 blood to marry ; when such disgraceful alliances have taken 
 place they have been the result of the brutal passions of men, 
 and cannot be charged directly to their religion. Their reli- 
 gion is to blame for debasing their minds and destroying in 
 them those pure feelings which would have rebelled against 
 these shameful marriages ; but their religion only enjoined 
 them to marry many wives ; it never taught them to select 
 those wives from their own households. 
 
 The women, in Polygamy, as might be expected, have all 
 
470 "SEE HOW I MANAGE MY WPMEDT ! " 
 
 along had to bear the heaviest part of the burden. It is pain- 
 ful to see how some of them will strive to maintain a hold 
 upon their husband's affections. They may, perhaps, feel bitr 
 terly their lonely and neglected position, and they may detest 
 the system, but they try, nevertheless, to make their homes as 
 pleasant, and attractive as possible. Some do this for one 
 reason, some for another ; but in most instances the chief 
 motive is a desire to draw away the husband from the other 
 wives ; — not that they particularly wish for his company or his 
 love, but they like to sh6w their power over him. I know 
 some of these Mormon men whose wives " manage " theni !» 
 this way. They think not a Ijttje of themselves, and believf 
 that they are indeed the lords of creation, and can have every-r 
 thing their own way ; while, all the time, they are perfect 
 objects of ridicule to every one who knows them, on account 
 of the way they are " managed " by their wives. Such men 
 fancy that they govern absolutely in thek households, and with 
 head erect they will boastfully say to their neighbors, " Seg 
 how I manage my women " — little thinking that it is the 
 women who are " managing " them. 
 
 Other good women make their hpmes pleasant from a sin- 
 pere desire that their husbands should be happy, and wil} 
 study, the most rigid economy while living alone, so as to save 
 out of their frequently poor allowance sufficient to entertain 
 the husband well when it comes to their turn to receive a visit 
 from him. Many a woman has thus earned the flattering 
 opinion of her husband for economy, and it has very materia% 
 strengthened her influence over him. I knew a lady, who by 
 a little management of this sort so pleased her spouse that hg 
 placed her at the head of his household, and the other wives 
 had to go to her for everything. This was all the glory shg 
 had ever dreamed of or desired. 
 
 Women of years and experience act thus ; but young and 
 thoughtless wives frequently try an opposite experiment, and 
 when their husbands come to see them they are always poor, 
 always needy — they never have enough of anything. Thl? 
 attempt to excite sympathy is seldom or never so successfu} as 
 
AFFECTION AND Gohv COOKERY. 4^1 
 
 the other plan. Th'e pleasant honie and smiling welcome are 
 more attractive to the Mormon husband than the complaints 
 of a dissatisfied wife. Many a good Saint, although, of course, 
 he would scorn to acknowledge it, is wtell known to make his 
 principal home with the wife who is the best cook, notwith- 
 standing that affection may not run in the same direction ; but 
 when the wife Vvho sets the best table is also the wife best 
 beloved, the husband is a happy man indeed. 
 
 Quite a number of the leading Mormons have wives in the 
 various settlehienta ; and this is Very convenierit to them if 
 they have to travel much. If the wives are old and expe- 
 rienced, as wives who are sent into the country generally ar€, 
 they can then look after and manage a farm ; and if they have 
 growing boys, the farm can be worked upon a very economical 
 plan. The younger wives in the city can be supplied from them 
 with all tlie butter, cheese, vegetables, &c., that they require. 
 It takes considerable shrewdness to manage women in such a 
 way as to turn all their abilities to good account and to make 
 them profitable. American men, I have always found, were 
 most successful in this experiment ; the English, as a general 
 rule, are not smart enough, thougli I have known instances 
 "where smart Englishmen with several wives have so arranged 
 as to live entirely without working themselves. They man- 
 aged matters to perfection ; getting all the labor that was pos- 
 sible out of those unhappy women, and in return breaking 
 their hearts With unkindness and neglect. 
 Mormon men say, "Do not the Gentiles do just as bad.'" 
 No ; they do not ! There are bad men everywhere, and, a^ 
 every one knows, there are among the Gentiles men whose 
 cruelty to their wives could not be surpassed. But those men 
 do not attempt to hide their sins under the mantle of religion ; 
 ^hey do not crucify tbeir wives in the name of God. Bad 
 men atnong the Gentiles support a woman — whether wife or 
 not — so long as they care anything about her ; and do the 
 Mormon men do anything more? Hundreds of discarded 
 wives in Utah could bear me witness that when they grew 
 old, or their husbands grew tired of them, they cast them off 
 29 
 
472 A PICTURE, 
 
 quite as ruthlessly and with as little compunction as any 
 unprincipled Gentile man ever discarded a mistress who no 
 longer had any place in his affections. In one respect cer- 
 tainly the Mormon men bear off the palm for cruelty; for 
 they add insult to injury. The sins of wicked Gentiles are 
 hidden from their wives ; but the Mormon men flaunt their 
 sins in their wives' faces, and in the faces of their grown-up 
 sons and daughters, and style their iniquity " The Celestial 
 Order of Heaven ! " 
 
 Let me ask the good brethren who read this, to act for 
 once impartially, and try to put themselves in a woman's 
 place ; and let me for their benefit draw a little picture for 
 them to contemplate. 
 
 It is evening, and the family are all assembled in their 
 pleasant home — a home made happy by the kind and thought- 
 ful care of a loving father. Peace and tranquility dwell in 
 every heart, and the father is happy in being surroiinded by 
 his children, to whom he is fondly attached. He listens to 
 the prattle of the little ones, or the music and songs of the 
 elder children ; and for a time he is forgetful of everything 
 save the happiness of the hour. 
 
 Suddenly his wife — the mother of his children — whom he 
 dearly loves, rises from her seat beside the fire and retires to 
 her own apartment. There she arranges her toilet with irre- 
 proachable care, sees that every straying curl is in its place, 
 and gives every touch to her appearance which she thinks is 
 likely to render her attractive in the eyes of a man. She now 
 descends the stairs, ready to leave the home of this, her first 
 husband, for she is going to see her second husband, or some 
 young man to whom she has taken a fancy, and who she 
 thinks would be suitable for a third. She kisses her children 
 good-bye, and is about to take an affectionate farewell of their 
 father when she suddenly discovers that he is not looking 
 happy. " What is the matter now "i " she says ; " Is not your 
 home a pleasant one ; have I not taken pains to train your 
 children in a proper manner ; and have I not remained an 
 hour longer than usual with you .'' What folly it is for you to 
 
THE CASE REVERSED, 475 
 
 be moping in this way : this is not the way to live our reli- 
 gion, if we expect to get the blessing of God. You know 
 very well it is very painful for me to leave you and my 
 children ; but we must be obedient to the commands of God, 
 and I owe attentions to my other husband as well as to 
 you!" 
 
 Can any man be supposed who would for a moment endure 
 such an outrage upon decency and common-sense — such a 
 violation of all that is sacred in the human heart ? And yet 
 this is only reversiag the case ; and just as any Mormon man 
 can suppose he would feel, if the wife he loved were to act in 
 the way I have described, so do Mormon wives feel — only as 
 much more acutely, as women are more sensitive in their 
 affections than men. I remember painfully the bitterness of 
 soul which I experienced when there was only one wife 
 besides myself ; and thousands of women in Utah could bear 
 witness, if they would, to the hopeless misery which the 
 system causes, and the desolate void which it creates in the 
 heart of every thoughtful and affectionate wife. 
 
CHAPTER XXXIV. 
 
 LIGHTS AND SHADOWS OF POLYGAMY :— MARRIAGE AND 
 BAPTISM FOR THE DEAD. 
 
 Domestic Difficultie's^Husband and Lover — How Brother Brigham Treats Hi* 
 Wives — Polygamy in Poverty — Obedience the Crowning Virtue — How 
 Women Feel and Act in Polygamy — ^A First Wife's Trials — The Young 
 Second Wife — Home Life in Polygamy — The Husband Displays His 
 " Jewels " — Our Worldly Prosperity — The First Daily Paper rn Utah=- 
 Whisperings of Murder — Not in the Confidence of " The Church " — Brig- 
 ham's Inconsistencies — Mr. Stenhouse Refuses a Contract — How Brother 
 Brigham "Jumps at an OflEer" — How He Makes His Money — I Remind My 
 Husband of Certain Things — Another Visit from My Talkative Friend — 
 Baptism for the Dead — Baptized for Queen Anne — A Strange Description of 
 ^Paradise — Napoleon and Washington Mormon Elders — Queen Elizabeth 
 Enters into Polygamy — Becoming Proxy for Henry VIII. — The Wife of the 
 Thief on the Cross — Waiting for Queen Fanny! 
 
 MY life was now one continued series of deceptions, as 
 was also that of my husband, and we began habitually 
 to wear the mask when in each other's presence. It cannot 
 be otherwise in Polygamy. To avoid wounding the feelings 
 of the first wife, the husband, if he cares for her, affects an 
 indifference for the second wife which he does not really feel ; 
 and the first wife is not deceived by it, for she knows he is 
 only acting a part, and that as soon as her eyes are off him 
 he will be transformed into the most ardent lover. 
 
 If affectionate before and demonstrative in his love towards 
 
SECRET SORROWS- 477 
 
 his wife and children, he has to suppress it all now, lest he 
 should arouse jealousy in the heart of the other wife and be 
 thought partial. He can never now manifest a husband's or 
 a father's love ; hence his own nature becomes cramped, and 
 the affections of his heart are dwarfed. His children grow up 
 ignorant of what he really is, and, although he is living in the 
 same house with them, it might truthfiilly be said that they 
 do not know what it is to have a father. Consequently, their 
 love for him is very limited ; they know nothing of those 
 spontaneous effusioos of tenderness which link the heart of 
 the child to its parent ; and themselves, in their own experi-r 
 ence, ignorant of that domestic happiness which in childhood 
 is the charm of home, and, in fact, never knowing what a 
 home should be, when they, in their turn, marry and have 
 children of their own, they set up another of those cold and 
 soulless homes with which Polygamy is cursed. 
 
 But let me lift the curtain and give an illustration from 
 the family of Brighaih Young himself. In that family I have 
 seen the practical working of the plural-wife system exempli- 
 fied under its most favorable aspect. I have conversed with 
 Brigham's wives as a sister in the same faith, and I know how 
 they feel ; but I am compelled to confess that, notwithstand^ 
 ing all the order and system which characterise the Prophet^i 
 household, and the fact that his wives are, on account of his 
 great wealth, free from the troubles and inconveniences 
 entailed by Polygamy in poverty, and although they are, 
 taken collectively, as amiable and good women as any in 
 Utah — their lives are unhappy and they themselves are 
 miserable. They have never known the meaning of domestic 
 happiness, and though to the casual observer they may 
 appear contented with their lot, secretly they mourn over the 
 constant struggle in their hearts between the system and 
 their own womanly nature. Even the most favored of thera 
 lead cold, mechanical lives ; joy and affection they have never 
 known. Many of them have been cast off for years, and all 
 are neglected except the favorite, of the hour. 
 
 The Mormon leaders teach that a woman's exaltation in 
 
47^ HOW BRIGHAM TREATS HIS WIVES. 
 
 heaven depends upon the number of her children, and yet 
 Brigham has wives who might be mothers of large families, 
 but whom he has neglected for years. 'They are called the 
 wives of Brigham Young, and they live under the same rOof 
 with him ; but they have no real husband, and their children 
 no father in the dear sense of that word as ordinary Chris- 
 tians understand it. They know nothing of the sweet famili- 
 arity, the loving interchange of thought and feeling which 
 belongs to true married life. Once a day they are honored 
 by the presence of their lord and master at their table ; and 
 this privilege is, of course, only enjoyed by those who live in 
 the same house with him, — those who live in other houses 
 very seldom see him more frequently than once in two or 
 three months. They bask in the sunshine of his presence for 
 about half an hour in the evening when the family assembles 
 in the Lion House for prayer. But in the theatre, the Taber- 
 nacle, and the ball-room, the majority of them only see and 
 worship him at a distance. They are but pensioners upon 
 his bounty ; all their individuality is destroyed, and they are 
 completely lost in him. They have no position in society — 
 he is the only person ever seen or talked of. People in Salt 
 Lake City neither know nor care any more about Mrs. Young 
 the first or the nineteenth than they do about the wives of 
 any other Saint. In their home life they have to bear all the 
 bitterness and heartburnings which, patient, pious women as 
 they are, the silly and licentious favoritism of their "husband" 
 for the last new wife, whoever she may be, always produces. 
 I think that no man in Utah so recklessly wounds the feelings 
 of his wives in this respect, or acts as if he thought it was a 
 woman's duty to crush every feeling and bring herself to 
 submit without a question to her husband's will, as does 
 Brigham , Young. And yet his wives, whose withered and 
 blighted existence is a reproach to humanity, are very good 
 specimens of what the Celestial Order of Matrimony can 
 produce. What, under less favorable conditions, Polygamy is, 
 I leave the reader to imagine. 
 
 Let us look at the family life in some of the country 
 
THE "privilege" OF POLYGAMY! 479 
 
 settlements where the husband — ^without any order or system 
 in his nature, and without the means or even the idea of 
 providing for the comfort of his family — is seeking in his 
 coarse way to imitate Brother Brigham and to work out his 
 own idea of Celestial Marriage. There we shall find the same 
 repression of all womanly feding, the absence of any sancti- 
 fying or refining influence, while at the same time the hard 
 lot of the wives is unrelieved by even the solitary recreations 
 and the personal comforts of Brigham Young's wives. This 
 is the condition of many a poor, weary wife in Utah. 
 
 These are the women who Brigham Young has said should 
 be " damned " if they murmured or rebelled. What hope is 
 there for them or for their children ? Between the two ex- 
 tremes — Polygamy as it exists in the Prophet's household, and 
 as it is in the homes of poor Mormons in the Settlements — 
 the celestial order of marriage can be found under all conceiv- 
 able circumstances of poverty and wealth, ignorance and cul- 
 ture. It had been told us frequently and emphatically that 
 the " privilege " of Polygamy was reserved for those who had 
 demonstrated their purity by a life of goodness ; and the idea 
 that it was denied to the wicked and licentious was very re- 
 assuring to the minds of many. But we soon discovered that 
 if only a man was obedient to the Priesthood, his moral charac- 
 ter had little or nothing to do with his obtaining more wives. 
 Assassins and inebriates like Porter Rockwell, and even 
 murderers like Bill Hickman and John D. Lee, and other 
 wretches, had as many wives, and even more, than some of the 
 best men in the community. It is, I believe, true that John 
 D. Lee had several wives sealed to him after it was known that 
 he had taken such an atrocious part in the Mountain Meadows' 
 Massacre. 
 
 It is a fact that Polygamy among the Mormons has been 
 entered into by people of every kind, under all circumstances, 
 and from every conceivable motive — from the basest to the 
 purest. But its effect has invariably been to develope the 
 weaker side of human nature. At the same time, Hke othfer 
 institutions which for religious purposes have suppressed true 
 
4,80 THE MOTIVES OE MORMON WOMEN. 
 
 manly and womanly instincts, it has in. exceptional cases pro- 
 duced much that was noble and, generous. Many faithful first 
 wives, seeing in the practice of the celestial order the prospec- 
 tive glory of their husband^, have borne the heavy, burden of 
 life patiently and uncomplainingly, and even, while daily suffer- 
 ing that which was worse than death, have sought to be kind 
 and loving to those very women, who under a false belief have; 
 inva,ded the sanctuary of their rights and stolen from them 
 that which they held most dear. While I know of very many 
 polygamic wives who have sacrificed themselves continually, 
 receiving the most meagre, show of love and attention, hoping 
 and striving to harmonise matters ; on the other hand I could 
 tell of many first wives who have urged their husbands into, 
 Polygamy, merely that the plural wives might become, the 
 household drudges while they thernselves took their ease an4T 
 pleasure. Then, again, there are polygamic wives who have, 
 taken the power into their own ha,nds, grasping every comfort 
 and monopolising every attention, while the first wife pinedt 
 away unnoticed and crushed with domestic cares. With men, 
 top, there was the same variety. Some have delayed entering 
 into Polygamy for years, and then they have taken every pre-, 
 caution to avoid giving pain, to their first wives ; while others,, 
 on the contrary, have been perfectly indifferent as to what; 
 pain they caused their wives, relentlessly trampling under their, 
 feet every sentiment of delicacy and affection. 
 
 In my own case, my husband, did all he could to spare my 
 feelings as much as possible ; but it was, nevertheless, a hard, 
 task for me to subdue my own heart, and I found that all that- 
 I had anticipated in imagination was nothing compared with 
 the realisation. Feelings of degradation, disgust, and humilia-; 
 tion filled my heart constantly and without ceasing. From the: 
 day of my husband's second marriage, I could never look upon 
 him with pleasure-^he was no longer my husband, and I now, 
 felt, no desire to confide in him. Even the very sight of him 
 filled my rebellious soul with the bitterest feelings, although, atp 
 the same time; I knew and felt that he tried in every way to 
 sn^ooth my rugged pathway. 
 
THE SECOND WIFE, 48I 
 
 Strange as it may at first appear, had it been otherwise my 
 burden would have been lighter, for> if he had treated me with 
 cruelty and neglect, I should have withdrawn all affection from 
 him and would have cast him out of my heart for ever. It is a 
 painful thing for a wife to think thus of the father of her 
 children. 
 
 It may have been wrong, perhaps, but T confess that for my 
 husband's intended bride I felt such a detestation that I could 
 not endure her presence, although I knew that she was not to 
 blame. I believed that I should not have felt it so much if 
 she had been a little older ; but to have a mere child' placed on 
 ai level with me, and to be compelled to treat her with all the 
 respect due to a wife, was so terribly humiliating to me that at 
 times I thought that I could not endure it another day. She, 
 of course, expected to be treated with all the consideration 
 which is proper to a wife, and to be consulted in everything 
 by my husband, as a wife should be. She was not, however, 
 competent to undertake any household duties or wifely cares, 
 and was herself an additional responsibility to me. Young' 
 and inexperienced as she was, she had everything to learn ; 
 but, at the same time, she stood so much upon her dignity that 
 it' was anything but a pleasant task to teach her. It, of course, 
 dtvolved upon me to instruct her in everything, and I found 
 it anything but a congenial task. I soon began to look upon 
 her simply as a boarder, and expected nothing -more from he? 
 than I should if she had really been such. 
 
 She took very kindly to this position, and would spend her 
 days in her own room, reading and otherwise amusing herself, 
 and, of course, was always pleasant and well-dressed to receive 
 her husband. But this did not suit me. In fact I do not 
 know what would have suited me at that time, for I was dis- 
 posed to be displeased with everything. And yet a visitor to 
 our house would, I have no doubt, have said, How very pleas- 
 antly those two wives get along together. This has been said 
 of scores of women in Utah by casual observers— Gentiles 
 who thought they " understood " the system. How little do 
 they know the. aching void and the bitter hatred which exists 
 
482 HOME LIFE IN POLYGAMY. 
 
 in the hearts of those wives — the detestation which they have of 
 one another. How little can they know, when everything is so 
 carefully hidden, even from their husbands. It is a shameful 
 thing that women — faithful wives and mothers — should be 
 placed in such a position. . 
 
 How many times durifag the day have I been compelled to 
 leave everything and rush to my chamber, and there on my 
 bended knees supplicate for strength to endure, thinking all 
 the time that, in ordaining this Revelation, God had given us a 
 burden greater than we could bear. 
 
 Then, in the evening, when we were assembled together in 
 our cosy parlor, as we were wont to be, all traces that remained 
 of the terrible struggle which I had endured were a sad coun- 
 tenance and perhaps the deepening lines upon my brow, which 
 contrasted unpleasantly with the bright and cheerful face of 
 the young wife, and made my husband feel that I was getting 
 very sour in my disposition, as, indeed, was probably the case. 
 
 I was totally ashamed of these thoughts, at times, and felt 
 that it was very wrong of me to feel so unkindly towards this 
 young girl, whose only offence against me was that she had 
 acted up to the religious teachings that had been instilled into 
 her mind from infancy. I reminded myself that, for aught I 
 knew, my own dear child might be placed in a similar position ; 
 and then how should I feel ? How prophetic this fear proved 
 eventually, the reader will presently see. 
 
 Such thoughts as these would soften my heart towards the 
 young wife, and although she probably never dreamed that I 
 had felt unkindly towards her, yet, to silence my conscience, I 
 would strive in every possible way to show her some kind 
 attention. I could but feel and know that she was a good but 
 inexperienced girl ; and I am bound to say that both she and 
 my husband tried to conduct themselves in such a way as to 
 give me as little offence as possible. Situated as I was, how- 
 ever, nothing escaped my observation, and I felt most keenly. 
 Had I been treated with the cruelty and neglect which has 
 fallen to the lot of- so many unfortunate women in Utah, I 
 should probably have been in my grave to-day, or in that 
 
DISPLAYING HIS " JEWELS !" 483 
 
 I 
 
 Asylum, which has been provided by the Church — situated on 
 a lonely hill at a sufficient distance from the city, so that the 
 cries of the unhappy, ill-treated, insane women should not be 
 heard. 
 
 Things and actions, which at another time I should have 
 considered too trifling to notice, had now a painful significance 
 to me. On one occasion, not long after the wedding, my hus- 
 band asked me to take a walk with him, and I consented. 
 Among the Mormons it is a custom to take their wives out 
 together very frequently. Their object, I presume, is to dis- 
 play the " jewels " in their crowns before the eyes of their less 
 fortunate brethren. I had resolved that I would never sub- 
 mit to this — if my husband would not take me out alone I 
 would stay at home. On the occasion I mention, when I came 
 out of my room ready dressed, I found him and his wife, Be- 
 linda, waiting and chatting pleasantly together and looking 
 unutterable love at each other. At least, so I thought, and I 
 felt greatly insulted and annoyed, and told them I did not wish 
 to go. I carefully avoided showing any outbursts of temper 
 before the young lady which I thought would be undignified, 
 for I desired at least that she should respect me, though I did 
 not want her love. If I had expected that they would urge 
 me to accompany them, I should. have been greatly mistaken, 
 for my refusal appeared to be just what they wanted. They 
 tripped off together as light-hearted and happy as children, 
 while I remained rooted to the spot, tearing my pocket hand- 
 kerchief to pieces, and wishing I could do the same with them. 
 
 I used sometimes to wonder whether it would-be the same 
 in the Mormon heaven, where this Celestial Order of Marriage 
 is expected to be carried out in all its fullness, and I felt 
 troubled for myself. These dreadful feelings would, I believed, 
 be the ruin of my soul, and I thought it was impossible for 
 me to obtain salvation until I had entirely subdued them, and 
 that I had not power yet to do. I had, however, so concealed 
 what I felt that my husband believed that I was becoming 
 used to this new life, which I am happy to say I never did. 
 Sometimes I felt that it was useless for me to fight against 
 
484. ARGUMKNTUM AD; HOMINEM. 
 
 the will of Heaven, if this indeed was a divine law, and as yet 
 I dared not take upon myself to say it was not, although in 
 my secxet heart I had at last begun sometimes to question in 
 earnest. My poor, benighted soul was looking anxiously at 
 that time for a ray of light toj guide my faltering footsteps. I 
 did not wholly belie\^, but I dared not rebel, for fear of draw- 
 ing down the wrath of an offended God upon my innocent 
 children and upon my husband, who I was firmly convinced 
 was actuated by a sincere desiretodo the will of Heaven. 
 
 There were, however, sometimes, little things which did not 
 quite harmonise in my mind. I remember once saying to my 
 husband, when he was telling me that nothing but a firm belief ' 
 in the divinity of the Revelation would induce him to take 
 another wife and that he would do so from principle alone, that 
 I thought, if that were the case, an older and more plain- 
 looking woman would do quite as well, and that he could dis^ 
 pense with so much courting. '* You are compelled to wear 
 dresses," he replied, " but you do not allow those dresses to 
 occupy all your thoughts. Nevertheless, you take some pleas'* 
 ure in selecting them, and you desire that they should be 
 pretty and look well. . So it is with men seeking wives." 
 
 This mode of putting the case was, I have no doubt; very 
 convincing to my husband's mind, and, at the moment, I could 
 not answer him. But calmer thought would have told me that 
 while wearing and choosing dresses was by every right-minded' 
 person considered perfectly legitimate, taking other wives was 
 by no means regarded in that light. The wrong was not so 
 much in the way the thing was done' as in doing it at all and 
 under any circumstances. Logically speaking, the argument 
 was good enough, but the premises were utterly unsound. 
 
 Day after day my rebellious soul was agitated by the same 
 troubled feelings. There was no rest for me — nothing upon 
 which I could stay my mind. My husband was painfully 
 aware that there was a coldness. and restraint existing bietween 
 his young' wife and myself, and I know that he was grieved by 
 it, for he had tried in every way to create a friendly feeling' 
 between us. I felt, however, that it was utterly impossible 
 
THE FIRST DAILY PAPER JN UTAH. 485 
 
 that I could ever be affectionate towards his other wife, much 
 as I might strive. I would do my duty, but I could not loVe 
 her, or, in fact, him either for that matter, when he was asso- 
 ciated with her. I regret to "be obliged to confess such a 
 truth, but from that time, and as long as I remained in Mor- 
 monism, the sentiment that was uppermost in my mind was an 
 utter detestation of the whole System. I despised myself for 
 being the abject slave that I was. Why could I not have the 
 moral courage to set everything at defiance — Revelation and 
 jail— and free myself from the bondage that enthralled me ? 
 
 I know this day scores of women in Utah who think and 
 ;feel ^exactly as I did then, who suffer wrongs against which 
 their hearts daily and hourly rebel, but who, like me, dread to 
 cast aside the yoke of the oppressor. 
 
 At that time, in respect to pecuniary matters we were very 
 comfortably bff. Almost immediately after our arrival in 
 Utah, Mr. Stenhouse had found employment on the staff of 
 the Deseret News. Before long,' he obtained the appointment 
 of Postmaster for Salt Lake City, and before his marriage 
 with Miss Pratt, he had started the Telegraph — -fhe first daily 
 paper that was ever published in Utah. From the beginning 
 it had been remarkably successful, for Brigham had counselled 
 the people to sustain it, knowing very well that he himself 
 would in return be supported by my husband. Brigham had 
 no more devoted follower than Mr. Stenhouse was then, for 
 the scales had not yet fallen from his eyes, and he believed the 
 •Prophet was really what he claimed to be — a faithful servant 
 of God. True, we had frequently talked together of his very 
 mean actions ; but my too generous, or perhaps too credulous, 
 husband had attributed all that to the weakness of his human 
 nature, and would not believe that it affected his priesthood. 
 He therefore sustained him strongly and consistently before 
 the ipublic ; not for gain, for he had given too many instances 
 of' his devotion to be suspected of that ; but I may say from 
 pure attachment, for I know too well that at that time he was 
 almost ready to lay down his life for the sake of his religion. 
 
 The Telegraph soon became the heading journal in Utah, 
 
486 OUR PROSPECTS BRIGHTEN. 
 
 and in a little while we were surrounded by every comfort and 
 luxury which at that time could be procured in Salt Lake City. 
 No family in the Territory was better provided for than was 
 ours, not excepting Brigham Young's. I had always believed 
 that if my husband were left alone, untrammelled by the 
 Church, to make his own way, he would do so successfully. In 
 this I was not mistaken. We now owned a fine dwelling- 
 house, a valuable city lot and house, where the paper was 
 printed, and also another very desirable lot, near to Brigham 
 Young's residence. This last lot was my own ; it was very 
 beautifully situated, and we expended on it upwards of three 
 thousand dollars. Everything that my husband undertook at 
 that time seemed to prosper-^not excepting his love affairs. 
 
 Just then a great deal was whispered privately about certain 
 murders which had been committed, all knowledge of which 
 was strenuously denied by the authorities. When any case 
 was so notorious that it could not possibly be altogether 
 hushed up, we were told that the murdered persons were dan- 
 gerous people and had been killed in self-defence by those 
 whom they in the first instance had attacked. 
 
 My husband, like hundreds of others, was never in the confi- 
 dence of the Church authorities in these matters. He believed 
 firmly in the divine mission of Joseph Smith, and shut his 
 eyes to the actions of Brigham Young, thinking that he alone 
 would be responsible to the Lord for his misdeeds. When I 
 drew his attention to the inconsistency of Brigham's conduct, 
 as on more than one occasion I did, he said we had enough to 
 do to look at home and see that we ourselves did what was 
 right. This, of course, was true, but I thought, nevertheless, 
 that a little more consistency on Brigham's part would not be 
 amiss. 
 
 I recollect a gentleman named Cook, for whose memory I 
 entertain the most sincere respect, wishing my husband to 
 take a contract to furnish grain for the Overland Mail Com- 
 pany, and how he urged him to do so for the benefit of his 
 family. Not long before that, however, Brigham had de- 
 nounced in the Tabernacle all those who took contracts or 
 
THE prophet's SWEET LANGUAGE. 487 
 
 who had any dealings with the Gentiles in any way whatso- 
 ever. One merchant in particular he singled out, and before 
 the whole congregation, showered upon him all his wrath — 
 going so far as to call him a thief, and saying that he " would 
 apostatise and go to hell." Yet Brigham to-day is associated in 
 business with that same man ! 
 
 Another gentleman, a Mr. Street, who constructed the first 
 telegraph line from California to Salt Lake City, acted a very 
 friendly part towards my husband, and wished to advance his 
 interests. He one day came to me and said, " Mrs. Stenhouse, 
 let me beg of you to use all your influence with your hus- 
 band, and, if necessary, even insist upon his taking this con- 
 tract which I have offered him. He is doing wrong to his 
 family by refusing, for he would make twenty thousand dol- 
 lars, with very little trouble. I have urged him until I am 
 tired, and unless you insist he will refuse from fear of doing 
 wrong, after all that Brigham Young has said upon that sub- 
 ject ; though I told him that Brigham would take it himself 
 and jump at it, if I were to offer it Jo him." 
 
 I had urged my husband before, and I felt certain that he 
 would not listen to my counsel. The contract was offered to 
 Brigham Young, and he did jump at it, and made his thousands 
 out of it. Even at that time I could not see why it would be 
 a sin for my husband to make the money, any more than for 
 Brigham to do so. But this inconsistency was observable in 
 everything. Many of the farmers' wives have frequently 
 told me that their husbands had been called to account 
 severely for taking their provisions to Camp Douglas to sell to 
 the Gentiles, while at the same time they ha9 seen many of 
 Brigham's own teams there with prcjduce 
 
 I felt it my duty to keep such things always before my 
 husband's eyes ; but he was what is vulgarly called a " hard- 
 shell " Mormon and it took a great many raps to crack the 
 shell and let in a little light. He, of course, would deny this ; 
 but wives, I think, are not generally mistaken in such matters. 
 I never neglected any opportunity, and when once I perceived 
 the slightest signs of weakness, I went to work with a will, 
 
488 "CHARMS FOR THE MEN." 
 
 until! got him to admit frankly that he was dissatisfied with 
 many things. But for all that, he still held to the belief thsSt 
 -Mormonism was true, whatever Brigham might be. To get 
 him to admit that Brigham was not right was a great deal, and 
 it gave me hope for the future. I tried hard to enlighten his 
 understanding, but made very little progress. The difficulty, 
 I believe, was that Mormonism possesses charms for the men 
 that it never has for the women. I firmly believe that they 
 willingly close their eyes to that which it does not suit them 
 to see. However that may be, notwithstanding all my 
 efforts, my husband still continued to sustain Brigham, and 
 worse still, before long he began to evince an earnest desire to 
 sustain one of Brigham's daughters also — of which I shall say 
 more presently. 
 
 My talkative friend called one day to speak of a very serious 
 subject. 
 
 " I have come. Sister Stenhouse," she said, " to talk to yoU 
 about a matter of great importance, but I don't want to 
 •offend you, and you must promise beforehand to forgive me." 
 
 I readily promised, and she added : " I thought I should find 
 you very unhappy, Sister Stenhouse, about poor, dear Carrie 
 Grant, and I think if you are so you deserve it, but I don't like 
 you to be miserable, and so I came to comfort yoii." 
 
 " But, Sister Ann," I said, " I don't want to be comforted 
 in the way you seem to mean. I have been very sad indeed 
 at losing Carrie, but you know I did everything I could 
 for her, poor girl, and I have nothing to blame myself for." 
 
 "Nothing ttf blame yourself for?" she exclaimed. " Why, 
 Sister Stenhouse, you have everything to blame yourself for. 
 If poor Carrie has less glory it is all your fault." 
 
 " How so ?" I said. 
 
 " Why," she answered, " if you had not held back and ex- 
 pressed your dislike, Carrie would have married your husband, 
 and would most likely have been alive now. She would have 
 had /ler family, and would have added to your husband's glory:; 
 while now;, although she is your husband's wife, she has no 
 
SISTER ANN " COMFORTS " J^E ! 48 
 
 fbildren, and, of course, must have less glory in the King- 
 dom." 
 
 " Well, Sifter Ann," I said, " I never thought of it in that 
 light. I loved Carrie very much, and I tried to make her love 
 me. It was not vintil almost the last that I knew of her love 
 for my husbj(,nd ; bi^t if I had known before, I am sure my 
 own heart would have rebelled against my husband taking 
 ijdaother wife. I did, however, ask him to marry her, and 
 ffter she was dead I was married to him for her." 
 
 " That's all very jyell. Sister Stenhouse," she replied, " butf 
 i^qr all th^t, I think you have committed a great wrong against 
 that poor orphan girl. You ought to be thankful that at last 
 you were able to repair a little of the mischief which you did. 
 I don't want to vex you, but I am really sorry that you had 
 such an antipathy to your husband having Carrie. However, 
 I suppose now he has really got another wife you are i ■; so 
 much set against Polygamy. You must find it quite a Mess- 
 ing to have Miss Pratt — I beg pardon, I mean Mrs. Stenhouse, 
 ji^imber two — with you now." 
 
 I did not answer her, for I had my own opinion about the 
 matter. She went on without hesitation : " Well, you must 
 not be vexed \yith me, dear ; I say it ajl for your good, yoi| 
 know ; but I do w:ish you felt a little more as I do about these 
 matters. Why, do you, know, I have been trjdng to show 
 |ny ffiith j^iid zeal in every possible way ever since we 
 came to Utah. It was only last wee^ I was baptized for 
 Queen Anne." 
 
 "Queen Anne!" I exclaiiped. "What can you possibly 
 mean ? " 
 
 "Exactly what I say. Sister Stenhouse — I was baptized for 
 Queen Anne, j^nd if you like I'll tell you all about it. It i^ 
 only just what every one else ha,s been doing, only they were 
 baptized fpr other people. I don't think you've ever thought 
 much of thi^, ^nd so I'll explain myself. You see, Sistes 
 Stenhouse, the Elders teach us that the whole world is lying 
 jn ^rlcnes^ s^d pin, and has been so, ever since the apostoliq 
 gifts were Ip^t ^ges ago. J^ow there is no salvation outside 
 30 
 
490 BAPTISM AND MARRIAGE FOR THE DEAD. 
 
 the Church, and you may remember that Christ Himself went 
 and preached to the miserable souls in Paradise." 
 
 "In Paradise.'" I said, "why I thought that was a happy 
 place." 
 
 " Oh, no, Sister Stenhouse," she' said, "not very happy. The 
 souls of those who have not heard the Gospel, and have not 
 been baptized, go there, and it's a sort of prison for them until 
 they are brought out again through the kindness of some 
 believer. The thief on the cross went there, and Christ went 
 there and preached to the spirits in prison, and when the 
 Elders die they go on mission to Paradise and preach to them 
 also. All your people and my people, our fathers, and moth- 
 ers, and grandfathers, and so on, right up to the apostolic, 
 times, are waiting in Paradise with millions and .mil lions -of 
 souls to be released and be admitted into the Celestial King- 
 dom. All the good brethren and sisters have been doing their 
 best to get out their relations and friends, arid I know many 
 of them who have sent over to England and have spent large 
 sums of money in tracing their pedigrees and genealogies, in 
 order to find out the right names and to be baptized as prox- 
 ies for the dead who owned those names. I have been baptized 
 for a good many of my own relations, and I mean to be bap- 
 tized for scores more ; and many of the brethren, too, have 
 been married as proxies for their own friends, and for distin- 
 guished people besides, so that they might be admitted into 
 the celestial kingdom and raise up patriarchal families of their 
 own. The pdor souls, if they were released from Paradise by 
 a proxy baptism, could not, of course, have been married in 
 heaven, as there is no giving in marriage there ; so some one 
 was married for them as proxy to some one else, and now they 
 can begin to establish their own celestial kingdoms." 
 
 "And have you been proxy in this way. Sister Ann >" I asked. 
 
 " No, and yes," she replied, " I haven't yet been proxy in 
 marriage for any one, but I was proxy in baptism. When we 
 were children I remember we used to have some rhymes abbilt 
 Queen Anne, and as it was my own name I always thought'a 
 great deal of her. It seemed to me that it would be very nic^ 
 
NAPOLEON AND WASHINGTON BECOME MORMON ELDERS. 49I 
 
 and at the same time very charitable, if I were to help her out 
 of Paradise — It quite struck my fancy, for it was no small 
 thing to have a real queen thankful to you for so much. So I 
 went and was baptized for her, and now she is out of Paradise 
 and has entered the Celestial Kingdom. But that isn't all. 
 There was my old friend, George Wilford, who heard all about 
 the matter, for I see him frequently, and he at once said that 
 he would be baptized for Prince George of Denmark, Queen 
 Anne's husband, and he means to do so, and, after that, we'll be 
 married by proxy for them here on earth, and then they'll both 
 be happy." 
 
 "Why, Sister Ann, what a droll idea," I said. 
 
 "Sister Stenhouse," she replied, quite seriously, "It's very 
 wrong of you to talk so. Some of the best Saints have stood 
 proxy in this way. There was one lady who stood proxy for 
 the Empress Josephine, and her son stood for Napoleon, and 
 some one else for Washington. Queen Elisabeth, too, has 
 been baptized by proxy. And now Napoleon and Washington 
 are both Mormon Elders, and I suppose some one will be 
 married for Queen Elizabeth, and she'll enter into Polygamy. 
 Do you know, Sister Stenhouse, there was one brother who 
 out of pure kindness said he would be baptized for the thief 
 on the cross, for he supposed that no one else would take pity 
 on him, and a sister who was present said she would be bap- 
 tized for his wife, if Brother Brigham thought he ever had 
 one. I've been persuading my Henry to be baptized for Henry 
 the Eighth, for I'm sure he needed baptism for the' remission 
 of sins ; and he — I mean my Henry — has promised me to do 
 so ; but he says that he means to ask Brother Brigham first 
 before he is married for him — if ever he is — as King Henry 
 was almost a polygamist in his way, and my husband thinks 
 there is not much need to be married for him at all." 
 
 "I can't help being amused," I said. "Of course I have 
 often heard of being baptized for the dfead, and I know the 
 Elders say that St. Paul spoke of it in one of his epistles, but 
 I never thought of it in that light; I always thought we should 
 have to wait till the Temple was finished." 
 
492 WAITING FOR QUEEN FANNY ! 
 
 "That's true, Sister Stenhouse;" she replied,— "all the 
 marriages of all the Saints -r- of every one, in fact, on the face 
 of the earth — ought to be solemnized in the Temple here 
 in Salt Lake City, and every one ought to receive their Endow- 
 ments in it ; but as it is not yet finished, the Lord permits us 
 to be married, and everything else, in the Endowment House. 
 But you know yourself that there's a Record kept, and that 
 when the Temple is finished, the ceremony will be all gone 
 through with again. I've heard it said that many of the Elders 
 and their wives will live there, and that day and night perpet- 
 ually the ceremonies will be going on. You ought to be bap- 
 tized, however, now for as many relations as you can think of." 
 
 " I think I shall wait. Sister Ann," I said, " until I can find 
 a Queen Fanny, and then I'll be baptized for her." 
 
 She did not like me saying this, for she evidently thought I 
 was jesting. I was not jesting, however, but I felt greatly 
 amused, for this peculiar doctrine of the Saints had never 
 struck me in such an odd light before. Sister Ann was 
 shocked at the way in which I viewed her strange stories, but 
 " I'll come again in the course of a day or two, Sister Sten- 
 house," she said, "and put you all straight." 
 
CHAPTER X.XXV. 
 
 FESTIVITIES AND SOCIAL GATHERINGS OF THE SAINTS :— 
 THE PROPHET'S WHISKEY SHOP, AND DRY-GOODS STORE. 
 
 An Absent Husband's "Kingdom" — A Suggestion — A Pleasant Time for a 
 Wife— "The Old Woman is Full of the Devil"— What I heard at the Pic- 
 Nics — A " Bishop " and his Four Wives — Quite a Spectacle : — The " Woman 
 in White ! "—The " Peg " that God Made for Brigham's Hat— Dancing among 
 the Saints — How Balls and Social Parties are Conducted — ^A Man Disgraced by 
 Following his Wife — Sad Fate of a Swedish Lady — Life in a "Dug-Out" — 
 Another Phase of Celestial Marriage ! — A Wronged Wife who Poisoned Her- 
 self—An Apostle's Five Wives ! — Doing a Kindness for a Dead Uncle — 
 Marrying four Wives on the Same Day— The Fish Brought in by Brother 
 Brigham's Net — A Slumbering Conscience — The Prophet's Theatre — The 
 "Word of Wisdom" — Brigham Young's Whiskey-making Establishment — 
 The "Revelation" and the Five-gallon Keg— Why Brigham sells bad Whis- 
 key— The Dry-Goods Store of "the Prophet of the Lord." 
 
 THE more I saw of the practical working of the system in 
 Utah, the more did I learn to detest Polygamy; for 
 although I hesitated to reject Mormonism altogether, I could 
 not for a moment believe that many things of which I heard, 
 and many which came beneath my own observation, could 
 under any circumstances be considered right. 
 
 About that time, I made the acquaintance of a sister whom 
 I shall call Mrs. W . Her husband was on mission and 
 
494 A ABSENT husband's "KINGDOM." 
 
 had left his family without any suitable provision. She herself 
 was a remarkably neat and lady-like woman ; but she appeared 
 to be delicate in health, and spoke with so much languor and 
 despondency that, directly I saw her, I was led to suspect that 
 her house also was haunted by that spectre — Polygamy. 
 
 She complained of poverty, and told me that her courage 
 was really failing ; for, after she had striven so hard to provide a 
 home for her children, her husband had taken a young wife, 
 who seemed to think she had as much right in the sister's 
 house as the sister had herself. " She does not assist in the 
 least towards getting a living," she said, " and we have been left 
 entirely unprovided for, as the Church takes no care of the 
 Missionaries' wives. What is the use of slaving as I do to 
 prolong such a life as mine.' My husband is coming home 
 soon, and he is sure to bring one or two girls with him. They 
 all do so." 
 
 During our conversation, she told me that some of the dig- 
 nitaries of the Church had intimated to her that the wives of 
 Missionaries who were obliged to be absent for several years 
 had duties to perform which ought not to be neglected. It 
 devolved upon them to see that their husband's "kingdom" 
 did not suffer 4uring their absence, and that if she herself 
 were more complying in this respect, her pathway would be 
 rendered smoother. I had heard it hinted before that such 
 abominable suggestions had been thrown out, but this was the 
 first time that I had met with any one to whom they had per- 
 sonally been made. There are bad men in every community, 
 and the Saints are no exception. It is but fair to state that 
 the great mass of the Mormon people would be as truly horri- 
 fied at such doctrines and practices as any Gentile man or 
 woman could be. 
 
 The constant anxiety of this lady, of whom I have been, 
 speaking, was such that she often threatened to poison herself 
 and thus put an end to her misery. Her husband began to 
 pay his addresses to a young English girl who came in with 
 the hatid-carts, and he made as great a simpleton of himself 
 as it is possible for a man to do when he is in love. He was 
 
"THE OLD WOMAN IS FULL OF THE DEVIL." 495 
 
 scarcely ever at home ; and often of an evening the wife would 
 see the young girl walking towards the house waiting for. 
 her — the wife's — husband, and on two occasions the girl 
 threw a little stone at the window to indicate that she was 
 there. The poor wife never dared to say a word against 
 Polygamy in the presence of her husband. When she felt so 
 utterly miserable that she could no longer contain herself, and 
 ventured a word of remonstrance at his cruel neglect of 
 her and her five little ones, he would tell her — quoting the 
 brutal language of Brother Brigham — that " she had had her day, 
 and that it was nothing but right that his future wife should 
 now have some attentions paid her. She mus^ round up her 
 shoulders and submit to the cross which we all have to bear ! " 
 
 One day he brought the young girl home to tea without 
 saying a single word previously to his wife about it, and it was 
 as much as she could do to be civil to the girl. She mastered 
 her feelings, however, sufficiently to treat her properly ; but 
 during the evening she had her temper tried to the uttermost. 
 Her husband sat all the time beside the girl, talking in an 
 under-tone, and toying with her curls. At last the wife's feel- 
 ings were worked up beyond endurance, and she told her 
 husband that, if he did not instantly desist, she would leave 
 the house. "You can go when you please," he said, "there 
 are plenty more women in the world, I guess. I suppose you 
 are jealous that you are not getting the same attention 
 yourself." 
 
 Then he turned to the girl and said, "Come, let us take a 
 walk; the old woman is full of the devil — she will get better 
 after awhile." 
 
 To say nothing of the man himself, what can be thought of 
 a girl who would marry a man who treated his wife in this 
 manner in her presence? And yet many Mormon girls think 
 that such men have simply been unfortunate in their first 
 choice of a wife, and will never treat them so. 
 
 This was another home, the happiness of which I saw 
 wrecked. In England, that poor wife had been gay and 
 happy, and her husband was as faithful and attentive to her as 
 
i^ A MORMON "bishop's" FOUR WIVES. 
 
 a husband should be. Now, utterly broken-hearted, trithout 
 Jtriy interest in this world, and without hope for that which is 
 to come, she was going to her grave, forsaken by man and, as 
 she poor woman also thought, forsaken by her God. 
 
 Often at parties and at pic-nics I met with unhappy wives 
 who unfolded their griefs to me, and some of the things which 
 they related were of a very painful nature. There were in- 
 stances of downright brutality arid cruelty which would not 
 adrriit of repetition. There were also hundreds of cases in 
 which wives suffered, not so much by any one particular act of 
 wrong, as by innumerable daily and hourly trials, which came 
 ■upon them at all times, and made existence itself a curse to 
 them. 
 
 1 retnembei- once, at a pic-nic party, meeting With several 
 first wives whom I had known before I came to Utah, and the 
 Stories which they told me were really shocking. At those 
 if)arties, which, of course, were intended for pleasure and 
 ■ amusetaent, there was much that was painful in the conversation 
 ' of the women among themselves, but which would never have 
 been noticed by a stranger. Pic-nics are generally understood 
 to be held in the open air, and in the country ; but we used 
 to call the ward-parties which were held in the Social Hall by 
 that name. The Social Hall was built "for this and similar 
 ..purposes, and was provided with a kitchen and other neces- 
 sary offices, for the preparation of suppers and other refresh- 
 ments. It was in this building that plays were acted before 
 the theatre was erected. 
 
 The pic-nic parties are quite an institution. Rich and poor, 
 young and old, babies and all, assembled at them to have " a 
 good time." They take their own " pic-nic " with them, set 
 their own tables, make their own tea and coffee, and nurse 
 ' their own babies. On the occasion to which I allude we went 
 rather early, and thus I had an opportunity of watching the 
 "arrivals. Some of them presented a very amusing appearance; 
 ^here was the Bishop of the ward and all his wives. Two of 
 his boys went in front of him, carrying a very large clothes 
 basket full of "pic-nic," as the eatables were called. Then, 
 
"the woman in white!" 497 
 
 striaggling after him, came four women and a bevy of noisy 
 children. The wives were all dressed in grey linsey skirts^ 
 blue muslin sacques, and green sunbonnets. When they took 
 off their bonnets I found that they all wore wreaths of roses or 
 some other flowers. On entering, I found that quite a num- 
 ber had already assembled and weire sitting bolt upright along 
 the sides of the hall, as whist as mice — the women on one side, 
 and the men on the other. At the further end of the hall I 
 saw an old lady sitting whom I recognised as one of my neigh- 
 bors. She struck, me as looking so strangely that I went 
 over to see what was the matter with her. She was pleased 
 to see me, asked me how I thought she looked, and Said that 
 this was the first party she had attended since she came to 
 the Valley. She had supposed that it was absolutely neces- 
 sary for her to wear something white, and had therefore ar- 
 rayed herself in a white night-dress which answered the pur- 
 pose of a loose sacque. Sacques and skirts were all the rage 
 at that time. She had on also a little white muslin nightcap, 
 and altogether she looked very neat and clean, but certainly 
 hot fit for a party. I did not, of course, like to tell her so, but 
 I felt sorry to see her dressed in that style. 
 
 Brigham Young was there, and kept his hat on all the time, 
 as was his custom ; and Heber C. Kimball sat during the 
 evening with a red pocket-handkerchief thrown over his head, 
 while the Apostle George A. Smith, a cousin of Joseph, the ori- 
 ginator of Mormonism, had a similar article thrown carelessly 
 round his neck. Heber once said publicly in the Tabernacle, 
 when speaking of the wearing of hats, and the proper degree of 
 I'espect which ought to be shown to the Prophet : " I never 
 feel as though I wanted to wear my 'at when Brigham is pres- 
 ent. I consider that the master should wear his 'at, or 'ang 
 it on the peg that God made for it, which is his 'ead, of 
 course." All these thitigs, however, have been changed since 
 Brigham came under the gentle control of Amelia. 
 
 On the occasion of which I speak, Heber came up the Hall, 
 soon after we entered, with five or six of his wives following 
 him, The wives always follow the husband. In fact, every- 
 
498 LADIES GO last! 
 
 thing that is done, whether in word or deed, impresses one 
 with the conviction that the Mormons are determined to make 
 the wohien feel and fully understand that they are inferior 
 beings. Even in the dance the man takes the lead. In all 
 the.c/iasses and promenades he precedes his wives and all 
 other women. In a special council, held in Salt Lake. City,, 
 Brigham Young once said : " For a man to follow a woman is, 
 in the sight of Heaven, disgraceful to the name of a man." 
 They have a curious kind of dance in Salt Lake City, called a 
 double cotillion, in which one man dances with two women. 
 This is done in order to accommodate those who have many 
 wives. On entering the hall, a number is given to each man, 
 and he is not expected to dance until his number is called.; 
 When that is done, they come like a streak across the hall to, 
 the ladies' side, to get partners ; and when the dance is ended 
 they conduct them back to their seats, and then all retire as 
 they came, with the exception of a few love-sick swains who 
 are reckless enough to break through this rule, in order to, 
 enjoy the society of their lady-loves between the dances. 
 
 It is only old and hardened Saints, however, who will ven- 
 ture to set at defiance long established regulations and endure 
 the scrutinizing gaze of the brethren on the opposite side of 
 the hall. All this has a very unsociable and stiff appear- 
 ance to those who attend one of these parties for the first , 
 time. 
 
 At the particular pic-nic of which I speak, I met a Swedish 
 lady whom I had known in New York. She had come out to 
 Utah, believing fully all that had been told her of that new 
 Zion. She was not very young or good-looking when she. 
 arrived, but she had a good deal of money, and consequently 
 was much troubled with offers of marriage. Finally she con- 
 sented to become a second wife ; but she very soon dis- 
 covered that her husband thought more of her money than he 
 did of herself. He gave her no peace until he got it all into his 
 own hands, and then he neglected her utterly ; scarcely ever 
 even coming to see her. 
 
 This poor woman, quite deserted by her husband, was 
 
HE MARRIED FIVE WIVES AT ONCE ! 499 
 
 obliged to live in what they call in Utah a " dug-out." A 
 " dug-out " is a large cellar, or hole, excavated in the ground, 
 just like the place formed in digging the foundation for a 
 house. It generally is only one fair-sized room, roofed in on 
 the top with boards, and with a few steps in front by which to 
 descend. Sometimes in such a place a man lives with a 
 couple of wives and a host of children, and this is one phase 
 of the order of " Celestial Marriage." 
 
 The Swedish lady, of whom I speak, had been well brought 
 up in her own country and was well educated ; she could, how- 
 ever, speak but Uttle English, and therefore found it very diffi- 
 cult to find employment, after the good brother had relieved 
 her of her property. So she worked in the fields, or did any- 
 thing else which she could get to do. She lived a wretched 
 sort of life, and, finally, poisoned herself ; but no one seemed 
 to care much about it, for very little attention is paid to the 
 death of a woman in Utah, unless she is a favorite wife. No 
 one troubles himself to make any investigations in such a case : 
 — the woman was neither young nor handsome, and she might 
 just as well die as live ! 
 
 The visitor to Utah is only allowed to see the holiday, out- 
 side manners of the people. If he thinks he sees more, he is 
 in most cases, deceived. But anyone who really knows the 
 great mass of the Mormon wives as they really are, would con- 
 fess that a more weary, worn, and dejected set of women could 
 nowhere be found. 
 
 How could it possibly be otherwise .' The whole system is 
 radically wrong. How could men act properly to their wives 
 when they marry as many as three, four, five, and six in one 
 single day ? Such things have actually been done, absurdly 
 impossible as it may seem. There was the Apostle Franklin 
 D. Richards, of whom I have previously had occasion to speak. 
 He married ^z*!? wives. Geoi-ge Grant — the brother of Jede- 
 diah M. Grant, the Apostle of the Utah " Reformation "— 
 warn&^fotir women at one time. They owned some very fine 
 property, and ill-tempered people said that Brother Grant had 
 an eye principally to that. But he, good soul, would tell you 
 
JOO NO COKFIDENCE. 
 
 that he did it altogether from principle. They all do, and 1 
 presume they ought to know best. 
 
 When Franklin D. Richards married the five or six widows 
 6f his uncle,* Dr. Richards, some people said that he was act- 
 uated by the same motive ; but his friends said that his only 
 wis'h was to be a father to the fatherless and a husband to the 
 widow! Brigham is always very willing that any of the 
 brethren should marry the widows of deceased Apostles or 
 other dignitaries ; but as for their property, that is quite An- 
 other thing. He himself always has an eye to that, and wben^ 
 ever it is possible, the net of the Prophet draws into its 
 meshes all that is valuable, whether small or great. 
 
 As for Brother Brigham's own iniquities, it would take a 
 book much larger than this present volume to tell theift 
 all. He lives, in fact, and has lived, for years, in a condition 
 of such constant antagonism to all right and honorable prin- 
 ciples, that I really believe that at last he hardly knows ^vheft 
 he is doing wrong. He does not like his actions to be scru- 
 tinized, and he has always taken special pains to prevent the 
 people from intermingling with the Gentiles, who he feared 
 might excite in them a spirit of inquiry. 
 
 When the United States army went to Utah, in 1857, oiie 
 half of the old Tabernacle was appropriated to the sisteiSj 
 and the other half to the brethren. The centre of the new 
 Tabernacle is now devoted exclusively to the sisters, and no 
 husband or brother is permitted to sit near them. This is 
 done for the purpose of avoiding the slightest opportunity 
 for any Gentile to converse with them ; for the Mormons, 
 as ■a. rule, have not the slightest confidence in their wives, 
 and are very jealous of them. I suppose this is natural, and 
 that the men, knowing their own frailty, judge their wives 
 from their own stand-point of morality. Brigham Young is 
 the most distrustful of them all. He not only guarded the 
 women in the Tabernacle, but when the theatre was built, 
 he arranged so that it would be impossible for Gentiles to mix 
 with the famiUes of the Saints. The Mormon families occu- 
 pied the parquette, and the Gentiles had the first circle. The 
 
THE DOER ANP NOT THE DEED. JOI 
 
 poor among the Saints are, of course, regarded as the common 
 herd, at all times, except when a collection is required, and 
 Ihen they are solemnly reminded that they are a sanctified and 
 peculiar people. It is not therefore necessary that any 
 trouble should be bestowed upon them, and no effort is made 
 to preserve them, in the theatre, from contamination with the 
 Gentiles. Gentiles and Mormons sit together in the second 
 aod third circles, and no one is expected to take any notice o| 
 it, as the theatre is Brigham's own property. 
 
 If the theatre had been owned or conducted by any one 
 else than Brother Brigham, it would have been a sin for the 
 Mormons to have mingled in it with the Gentiles. The people 
 Tjfovild have been " counselled " to remain at home, if they 
 eould not sit by themselves exclusively. But the fact that 
 Brigham is the owner of the theatre does away with any sin^ 
 fulness in the people attending it and sitting side by side with 
 the Gentiles. 
 
 In the same way, ^yhen Brigham made whiskey, the whiskey 
 \vas panctified. Joseph Smith gave a " revelation " which he 
 called " The Word of Wisdom," enjoining those who among 
 tjie Saints vfould be most saintly, never to touch any kind of 
 ^rong drink ; not even tea or coffee, or anything warm. This 
 rev^ation, as I before mentioned, we ourselves followed while 
 on mission, as, in f^ct, did all the members of the Church in 
 Jwrepe. It was pnly when we saw the American Apostles 
 qnd Elders — more fond of creature comforts than obeying the 
 commands of the Prophet — that we thought it was needless^ 
 for us abstain any longer ; and accordingly foUowed their ex- 
 ample, and ceased to deny ourselves many of those things 
 which are generally considered to be among the necessaries of 
 IJfci. The Saints in Europe were not backward in imitating 
 the Apostolic example ; and thus the " Word of Wisdom " has 
 ^len into disuse. 
 
 This I do not think was a matter to be regretted ; for orig- 
 inally this revelation was, I believe, given not for the promo^: 
 tjpR qf sobriety, but simply to get the people to save their 
 money, so a§ to bring in more to the coffers of the Chucchr 
 
502 BROTltER BRIGHAM S WHISKEY. 
 
 Its disuse enabled many a poor soul — old men and sick 
 women to whom a cup of warm tea or coffee was the greatest 
 comfort of their lives — to partake of those beverages without 
 fear ot committing sin against the " Word " of the Lord. 
 
 Whether Brother Joseph himself kept his " Word of Wis- 
 dom " may very well be doubted, for his own son, Alexander, 
 says, " There are those who say that the Revelation [on Poly- 
 gamy] was received over a five-gallon keg of whiskey.'' Cer- 
 tain it is that Brother Brigham, seeing that even among the 
 Saints every one did not care to keep this " Word of Wisdom," 
 turned the weakness of the people to profitable account. 
 
 A certain Mr. Howard set up a whiskey-making establish- 
 ment in Salt Lake City, and was doing a very good business 
 in that line ; but Brother Brigham declared that no more 
 should be made, and Mr. Howard was told to go on a mission 
 to preach the Gospel. Soon after he left, the establishment 
 was again running, and a great quantity of whiskey was sold ; 
 but as it was dispensed at a store surmounted by an imitation 
 of the All-seeing Eye, over the inscription, " Holiness unto 
 the Lord " — the sign of Zion's Cooperative Institution — no- 
 thing was thought of the matter. The nature of the whiskey 
 was, of course, changed. Some said, however, that it was not 
 changed for the better, and that Brother Brigham's whiskey 
 was much inferior to Brother Howard's, and much weaker. 
 Probably, Brother Brigham thought that strong drinks were 
 not good for the people, and made the whiskey weaker out of 
 pure love to them. 
 
 Many young Mormon boys, otherwise respectably brought 
 up, have been ruined by the too free sale of whiskey by the 
 Church. I know one young man, in Utah, who told me that 
 this had been the case with himself and several others. He 
 always silenced his conscience by saying that he had never 
 tasted anything but what was made at Brother Brigham's 
 establishment and sold at one of the Church stores. Finally, 
 seeing the inconsistency of these things, he turned away from 
 Mormonism, Brigham, and whiskey, all at the same time, and 
 then became a respectable and steady young man. 
 
THE prophet's DRY-GOODS STORE ! 505 
 
 When we went to Salt Lake, the Saints were not permitted to 
 keep Gentile boarders. If they did so they lost their stand- 
 ing in the Church. Those who persisted in doing so created 
 great scandal, and were themselves attacked without mercy in 
 the Tabernacle sermons. They were told that intercourse in 
 any shape with the Gentiles would cause them to lose the 
 spirit, and they were, therefore, warned against it. Since then, 
 however, so greatly have matters changed, that two of Brigham 
 Young's own wives have taken in Gentile boarders ; and more 
 than one of his daughters have taken in Gentile sewing in 
 order to provide a little extra pocket money for themselves — 
 money which they spent in what their father calls "wretched 
 Gentile fashions." 
 
 While the Prophet himself, and Daniel H. Wells, hia coun- 
 sellor, the Mayor of Salt Lake City, have made themselves 
 conspicuous in denouncing everything that was not Mormon, 
 some of their wives, and also their own sons and daughters, 
 are at this moment aping every Gentile who comes within 
 sight, and have done their very best to dress according to the 
 very latest Gentile style. The people, when they see Brigham 
 and his family themselves leading the way, think that there 
 can be no great sin in following ; and the more so as they are 
 able to purchase all the finery that their hearts can desire at 
 the dry-goods store of "the Prophet of the Lord!" 
 
CHAPTER XXXVI. 
 
 MY DAUGHTER BECOMES THE FOURTH WIFE OF BRIGHAM 
 YOUNG'S SON— THE SECOND ENDOWMENTS. 
 
 reaming More of the Inner Life — The Mistakes of Newspaper Correspond^ntSi 
 in Utah — Looking through Mormon Spectacles — Kept in the Dark — The Sec- 
 ond Wife Begins Housekeeping — Getting Rid of Her! — My Clara's Lover- 
 Joseph A. Young — The Engagement — Waiting for "Something" to Turn 
 Up — Asking Permission to Go East— How Mormon Girls are Deceived and 
 Deceive Themselves — Brother Brigham "Counsels" Brqther Stenhouse, — The 
 Wedding Day Fixed — The Marriage Ceremony in the Endowment-House — 
 Brother Brigham Officiates — Married for Time and for All Eternity — The 
 Fourth Wife of a Polygamist — A Mother's Sorrovy — We Receive our Second 
 Endowments — " Our " Husband Anpinted King and Priest — Belinda and_ 
 Myself made Queens and Priestesses — A Little Stranger : The Second Wife's 
 Baby—" The Conclusion of the Whole Matter." 
 
 AFTER I had consented, and m reality nad given my 
 husband a second wife, my status in Mormon polygamic 
 society was very considerably improved. First wives who lived 
 in, and firmly believed, this " Order of Celestial Marriage," 
 tried in every way to make me feel that I was one with them ; 
 and those who had not much faith felt more kindly towards me, 
 because I had been caught in the same snare with themselves. 
 Every polygamic wife — whether first, second, third, or 
 tenth — no matter how much or how little she may believe in 
 " Celestial Marriage" ; no matter how refined or how coarse and 
 
INTERVIEWING THE SAINTS. 507 
 
 degraded her nature may chance to be ; cannot help feeling 
 that her position is inferior to that of a monogamic wife. On 
 this account, many of the Mormon women are never satisfied 
 until they "have drawn every woman of their acquaintance 
 down to their own level. The influence of this supposed 
 "Eevelation" is by no means elevating or refining. 
 
 I was now upon an equal footing with other first wives. 
 They had, therefore, no hesitation in confiding to me their 
 griefs ; and situated as I was, I had abundant opportunities of 
 hearing stories of cruelty, wrong, and suffering, under the 
 " Celestial " system — many of them so utterly revolting that I 
 would not dream of relating them again. Polygamy among 
 the Mormons is so involved in disgusting and disgraceful 
 details, that a modest woman would not dare to relate all she 
 knew. In this book I have endeavored to be true to my title 
 and to "tell all" as far as such a thing was possible. But 
 there are thousands of horrible incidents, too degrading for 
 mention, which form part and parcel of the system of Poly- 
 gamy, but which no woman who had any respect for herself 
 would think of putting upon paper. 
 
 Previous to the time when my husband took his second 
 wife, although I had learned too much, I had to a certain extent 
 been kept in the dark respecting some of the vile and loath- 
 some practices of Polygamy ; but after that, by slow degrees, 
 I was thoroughly initiated into the system. 
 
 Visitors to Utah would perhaps notice in the faces of the 
 Mormon wives a dull, careworn, weary expression, altogether 
 the reverse of that contented look which is seen among 
 " Gentile " women. But those very women would never dis- 
 close to the stranger the depth of that sorrow which is wearing 
 away their lives. Some few, indeed, have been led to speak 
 of their troubles ; but they have afterwards found that the 
 very persons in whom they confided most, distorted and exag- 
 gerated eyery word that they had uttered, for the sake of 
 making a good story for the press. In many cases, the names 
 of those who were thoughtless enough to expose their sorrows, 
 together with little personal matters which should never have 
 31 
 
508 LOOKING THROUGH MORMON SPECTACLES. 
 
 been made public, were put into print; and when the matter 
 came before the Church authorities — as in course of time it 
 was certain to do — there was a great deal of trouble and 
 unpleasantness. Women, consequently, as a rule, tell nothing ; 
 and book-makers and people connected with the press, while 
 they give to the world astonishing stories of what they have 
 heard know really nothing of the truth. When a smart man, 
 or a man connected with the press, comes to Utah, the Church 
 authorities take him in hand at once. He is carried here and 
 there, and treated with the utmost deference ; a pair of Mor- 
 mon spectacles is placed by Brigham, or one of his numerous 
 factotums, upon the visitor's eyes, and through them he looks 
 at all that transpires. Then comes a glowing account in the 
 papers, or else apocryphal stories appear in the visitor's last 
 new book ; and unsophisticated people, who innocently suppose 
 that all that is in print must be true, begin to think that the 
 stories of the evil-doing of the Prophet, which from time to 
 time have crept out, were only scandalous reports, and that 
 Brigham Young — like Somebody else who shall be name- 
 less ! — was, after all, not quite so black as he has been painted. 
 
 The intelligent Saints, however, are not thus deceived. 
 They may hold to Mormonism, and may regard Brigham in 
 his priestly capacity as a Prophet ; but they are not blind to 
 his sins. I could, from my own personal knowledge, mention 
 the names of men in whom Brigham Young has the fullest 
 confidence and who are in daily communication with him. 
 Their faith, in most instances, has really fled, although in name 
 they are still "Saints;" they bow the knee before the Proph- 
 et's throne, but in their hearts they despise him ; for years of 
 intercourse with him have taught them what he really is. 
 
 This is, however, carefully hidden from the outer world. A 
 gentleman, who had for five years resided in Salt Lake City, 
 said to me a few months ago : " Mrs. Stenhouse, when I had 
 been here about three weeks I thought that I knew enough of 
 Mormonism to write a book; when I had been here three 
 months I began to think that I did not know quite as much; 
 and now, after five years, I have come to the conclusion that I 
 
"our" second wife begins housekeeping. 509 
 
 really know nothing at all. I have lived in a Mormon family 
 for the past year, but that has not increased my knowledge. 
 They are constantly upon their guard. They treat me kindly, 
 but they never let me know any thing." 
 
 This, I believe, has been the experience of nearly all the 
 Gentiles resident in Salt Lake City. Gentlemen had no 
 chance of learning anything, and the opportunities of ladies 
 were only a trifle better. 
 
 Up to this time I had said very little to my children about 
 my doubts and feaiis. With the exception of my daughter 
 Clara, they were all too young. Clara was just budding into 
 wotaianhood and day by day gave promise of more beauty and 
 ■interest in her future life. I dreaded to cast a cloud across 
 her way by telling her of my own apprehensions in respect to 
 Polygamy. If that were the "Order" of "Heaven," she would 
 certainly have to live in it ; and in any case it was the "order" of 
 Brigham Young, and my child could not escape from it, for no 
 one, unless at peril of life, could flee from Zion, in those days. 
 I kept, therefore, from my daughter all my own troubles, feel- 
 ing that she herself would soon enough have trials of her own. 
 She saw how much I suffered, and no doubt knew the cause ; 
 and, although she could not fully enter into my feelings, her 
 companionship was a great consolation to me, and I loved her 
 all the more because I felt that my own heart was widowed. 
 How often I prayed that she might be spared such a life as 
 that which I lived. 
 
 We had lived together in Polygamy about a year, when my 
 husband told me that his young wife desired to have a home 
 of her own, and that he intended to provide her with one. 
 This was very pleasant intelligence to me ; for the sight of that 
 other wife constantly before my eyes — sitting at my table, in the 
 midst of my family, walking in the garden with my husband in 
 the evening, or iiie-d-iSte with him in the parlor-:- was more 
 than I could bear. I began to feel, whether justly or not, that 
 my presence was a restraint to them, and that they felt 
 annoyed when I was with them. This feeling was so strong 
 with me that I constantly avoided them, and I finally concluded 
 
5IO MY CLAKAS LOVER. 
 
 to spend the evenings in my own room with my children, for 
 then, being out of their presence, I should perhaps be at peace. 
 All this time I hoped that my husband would urge me to come 
 back again to the parlor, and several times he did so, but I 
 thought that I was de trop, and remained in my room. He 
 thought that I was making myself quite disagreeable, and 
 such probably was the case, for no wife could be pleasant or 
 happy, situated as I was. 
 
 This, however, was all changed when my husband established 
 a second home. I did not mind being deprived of his society 
 so long as I could get rid of her. Personally I had no ill feeling 
 towards her, for she had always treated me with respect ; the 
 only reason why I hated her was because she was his wife ; 
 even her presence was painful to me, and when she was near 
 me I hardly felt able to breathe. 
 
 Just at that time, the marriage of my daughter Clara first 
 began to be talked about seriously. One day my husband 
 being out driving with Joseph A. Young, the eldest son of the 
 Prophet, the subject was discussed between them, and Joseph 
 A. made a proposition of marriage. This, to me, was the 
 cause of considerable uneasiness, as Joseph A. was a polygg.^ 
 mist, and at first I altogether refused to listen to the suggestion. 
 At that time Clara was not fifteen years of age, and not only 
 did I consider her altogether two young to think of marriage, 
 but I was shocked at the bare idea of her becoming a polyga- 
 mic wife. I almost hated Joseph for asking for her. 
 
 Personally I had no objection to Clara's lover. I had known 
 him for several years. He was an intelligent, generous-hearted, 
 and handsome man, of very good standing among the Saints, 
 and wealthy. As a friend, I valued and esteemed him ; but 
 that he, a,polygamist, should wish to marry my darling daughter, 
 was very repugnant to my feelings. Clara was then growing 
 old enough to understand my more serious thoughts and sen- 
 timents, and her companionship was very precious to me. The, 
 thought of her marrying into Polygamy was to my mind almost 
 as painful as the thought of her death would have been. 
 
 My husband agreed with me that she was too young to 
 
WAITING FOR "SOMETHING TO TURN UP." '511 
 
 marry ; but on that point he could not offer any great objec- 
 tion, as his own wife, although very womanly in appearance 
 was but very little older in years. I told Joseph A. of my re- 
 luctance to the proposed marriage and he fully entered into 
 my feelings. I could not absolutely refuse him, but I wished 
 to gain time. Every day found me more and more weak in 
 the faith, and I thought that, if I could only postpone my 
 Clara's marriage for a few years, something might transpire 
 which would relieve me of my difficulty. 
 
 Joseph promised tdwait just as long as we thought proper, 
 if only we would allow him to speak to Clara and explain to 
 her the sentiments with which he regarded her. In this he 
 acted in a way very unlike the Mormon men generally, and I 
 respected him accordingly. I promised him that I would not 
 influence my daughter, but would let her decide for herself. 
 This, after much careful consideration, I came to the conclu- 
 sion was all that I could do. My mind at that time was in a 
 very troubled state. Day by day my doubts respecting the 
 plural wife system became stronger and stronger, and I felt 
 that before very long some great change must take place, both 
 in my faith and in my life. At the same time, outward cir- 
 cumstances gave no promise of any such change. My hus- 
 band gave no signs of apostacy, and, as a Saint, I knew he 
 would never think of undertaking anything without the per- 
 mission of Brother Brigham. We did not even dare to leave 
 the city without consulting the Prophet. In times, then very 
 recent, it was at the risk, and sometimes, indeed, at the sacri- 
 fice, of life, that any one left Salt Lake Valley without permis- 
 sion ; and even at the present moment no good Saint who 
 values his standing in the Church would dream of going East 
 without first obtaining the approval of Brigham Young. I 
 could not, therefore, at the time of which I write, foresee the 
 great changes which have since taken place. To refuse my 
 daughter to the Prophet's son, would, I knew, be utterly use- 
 less. By partial submission I might gain some advantages ; 
 and the longer I postponed the marriage, the greater chance 
 there was that "something" might turn up, which we all 
 
513 BRIGHAM SETTLES THE MATTER. 
 
 more or less look for when we are placed in circumstancep 
 .which admit of the pxercise of very Uttle choice or effort, 
 
 My only objection against Joseph A. was, as I just stated, 
 that he was a polygamist ; but so long as we remained in the 
 Church I could not openly allege this in opposition to the 
 proposed marrifige. If my Clara married a single man, there 
 was every chance, if not an absolute certainty, that after a 
 while he would take another wife, or wives. This had been 
 the case with other girls with whom my child was acquainted. 
 They had married single men, trusting that their influence 
 over them would be sufficient to retain their affections ever to 
 themselves alone ; but they had soon reason to see how ground- 
 less their expectations and hopes had been. If, on the other 
 hand, I gave my daughter to a polygamist, there was' certainly 
 no reason why Joseph A. should be refused. I felt surrounded 
 on every side by difficulties, and out of them all I endeavored 
 to choose the least. 
 
 One day my husband told me that Brigham Young had se- 
 riously spoken to him about the matter, and had " counselled " 
 him to let the marriage take place at once, saying that my 
 Clara was quite old enough. After this, objection on my part 
 would have been utterly unavailing. Everything was settled 
 at the fiat of Brigham ; and the feelings and judgment of a 
 father and mother in respect to their own daughter were, of 
 course, of not the slightest consequence. 
 
 The wedding-day was therefore fixed, when the sweet flower 
 of my own quiet garden was to be transplanted to another 
 home. 
 
 We went to the Endowment House — my husband, myself, 
 and our daughter, together with some friends oi the family. 
 There we met with Joseph A. Young, the expectant bridei 
 groom ; his father, Brigham Young ; Joseph A,'s first wife—, 
 Mary Young ; and several of the brethren. Xhe bride and 
 bridegroom, and the bridegrqom's first wife, were all dressed 
 in their Temple robes. We then entered a §mall room where 
 the altar, of which I have already spoken, is placed. At the 
 end of the altar, Brigham was seated in a large arm-chain 
 
MY Clara's wedding. 513 
 
 covered with crimson velvet The altar was also crimson. 
 Brigham officiated. Joseph A.'s first wife, Mary Young, knelt 
 in front of the long crimson altar ; and my daughter Clara 
 knelt beside her on a sort of faldstool or ledge, arranged for 
 that purpose. Behind the altar, knelt Joseph A. Brigham 
 said : " Joseph, are you willing to take Clara Stenhouse to be 
 your lawful and wedded wife for time and for all eternity .' " 
 Joseph answered, " Yes." Then Joseph's first wife was told 
 to place the right hand of my daughter in the right hand of 
 her husband, in token that she was willing ; and then Clara 
 was questioned, as Joseph had been. When she replied in the 
 affirmative, Brigham said, " I pronounce you man and wife in 
 the name of the Lord. Amen." They were now married ; 
 and Brigham Young, Joseph A.'s first wife, and a few other 
 friends came home to the wedding breakfast, after which my 
 daughter went to her own pleasant home. 
 
 Thus my worst fears were realised — my own daughter had 
 become a polygamic wife — she was the fourth wife of her hus- 
 band, Joseph A. Young. 
 
 It is a source of sorrow to any mother who really loves her 
 children to lose them, even if it be for their own good and 
 happiness ; but in my own case there were reasons why I felt 
 the loss of my daughter more than I should have done under 
 Ordinary circunistances. I felt quite desolate without her ; for 
 when left all alone, when my husband took his second wife, 
 and when I had no one else to turn to, my little dafUghter had 
 entwined herself about my heart in a thousand sweet and 
 loving ways. She knew how great an influence music had 
 over me, and how much I loved to hear her play and sing ; 
 and when she saw how sad my heart was, or caught me in 
 tears, she would go to her piano, and lure me to her side by 
 some sweet song which she knew was dear to my memory. 
 But, with ber went all that love and gentleness which in my 
 time of deepest trouble sustained me and kept me from abso- 
 lute despair. 
 
 I have often wondered whether Joseph ever realised how 
 great, how dear, a gift I bestowed upon him when I gave him 
 
514- THE SECOND ENDOWMENTS. 
 
 my little Clara. But in saying this I do not mean to cast the 
 shadow of a doubt upon his true-heartedness and love towards 
 her. He was always kind and thoughtful, considering her 
 comfort in everything; and although they have now been 
 married seven years, he has never changed, but is the same to 
 her as on the first day of their marriage. A good, kind, and 
 gentle husband he has ever been, anticipating her every wish, 
 tenderly and carefully guarding her from even a painful thought. 
 My only regret has been that he is a polygamist, and she a 
 polygamic wife. 
 
 Not long after this, my husband one day told me that a select 
 few had been chosen to receive their Second Endowments, and 
 that we were to be honored with the same privilege. This I 
 was told was one of the highest honors that could be co;if erred 
 upon us, as the Second Endowments had never been given to 
 any one since the Mormons left Nauvoo. 
 
 The glory of this privilege I did not myself, however, feel ; 
 and, notwithstanding any respect which might be intended by 
 our names being added to the list of chosen ones, I refused to 
 see the slightest good in the whole affair. I am afraid I was 
 naturally perverse, — or was it that the light was now begin- 
 ning to dawn more clearly upon my niind .' I know not. But 
 I raised every possible objection, feeling, though I did, that all 
 opposition on my part was useless. I knew that I should have 
 to go, but J felt a dismal satisfaction in letting every one know 
 how much I hated the system. 
 
 Our second wife; — I say "our" because I had beer^ taught 
 that my husband and myself were indissolubly one, even in 
 the matter of taking wives ; — " our " second wife seemed the 
 happiest of us all when the day arrived, and I believe she con- 
 sidered that we were very highly favored. After preparing 
 our Temple robes, we started for the Endowment House. 
 The reluctance which I felt caused me to lag behind.'and I 
 was gently reminded several times that I was making myself 
 very disagreeable. I did not, however, feel much remorse, for 
 my husband had still one good, obedient wife walking at his 
 
POLYGAMY IN LOW LIFE:— THE POOR MAN'S FAMILY. 
 
 POLYGAMY IN HIGH LIFE:-THE "PROPHET'S" MANSION. 
 
WE ARE ORDAINED QUEENS AND PRIESTESSES ! 517 
 
 * 
 
 side, who I knew would sympathise with him ; and that, as 
 every one is aware, is more than falls to the lot of every man. 
 
 When we reached the Endowment House, we ladies were 
 shown into one room and our husband into another. We then 
 proceeded to array ourselves in our robes, caps, and aprons — 
 the same as when we received our first Endowments — and 
 when all was ready we were ushered into another room by one 
 of the brethren, who was also dressed in his Temple robes. 
 There we met our husband and several other brethren, all 
 dressed in the saaie way. We sat down, and oil was then 
 poured upon the head of our husband, by two of the brethren 
 — Daniel H. Wells, and another — and he was then ordained a 
 King and Priest to all eternity. After that, we two wives were 
 anointed in like irianner, and ordained Queens and Priestesses, 
 to reign and rule with our husband over his kingdom in the 
 celestial world. 
 
 Had I ever solaced myself with the notion, which some 
 Mormon women entertain, that first wives are queens over all 
 the rest, I should have been sadly disappointed when I heard 
 "our" second wife ordained to the same high ofifice as myself. 
 As it was, however, my faith was so small that I should have 
 been quite contented had they consecrated her alone queen for 
 Eternity, so long as they would have allowed me to rule and 
 reign by myself in my own home for Time. 
 
 The ceremony did not last long ; but it all appeared to me 
 such folly that I was anxious to leave the place, and though 
 I dared not say so, I was truly ashamed to be seen coming 
 out of the House. While going through these Endowments 
 I was filled with a thorough contempt for everybody and 
 everything around me, .and I suppose that my feelings were 
 visible upon my countenance, for, after leaving the House, I 
 remember the Apostle John Taylor asking me if I did not feel 
 well, and I told him as plainly as I dared what really was the 
 matter. He spoke to me very kindly, and tried to re-assure 
 me, but the scales were now falling from my eyes, and all his 
 arguments availed nothing. " 
 
 Notwithstanding all this, I was not ready yet to cast off the 
 
5i8 "GOD bLess you for that." 
 
 yoke, and a few months after our Second Endowments I again 
 gave evidence of my faith. An event occurred in the other 
 branch of my husband's family which produced a strong im- 
 pression upon my mind — a little daughter was presented to 
 him by his second wife. I was, of course, expected to go and 
 visit the young mother and child, and I thought I could never 
 bring my mind to do that. 
 
 It would be impossible for me to define my feelings at that 
 time ; — loathing and hatred for him and for her, and even for 
 the poor innoceijt babe, on the one side ; and, on the other, 
 thoughts of what I considered was my duty towards God, my 
 husband, and his other lawful wife. I was bewildered. — My 
 heart said. Do not go ; but my conscience said, It is your duty 
 to treat her kindly, for she believes she has done you no 
 wrong. Then I thought — She is a young mother, and with- 
 out ypu frowning upon her, sorrow will come swiftly enough 
 to her door. 
 
 I saw that my husband was troubled as to what my feelings 
 might be, although he had not had courage to tell me himself 
 of the interesting event. He was afraid of paining me and 
 sent a lady friend with the intelligence. I spoke to him 
 myself and told him that I would go and see Belinda and her 
 child. He thanked me and said, " God bless you for that." 
 Then I went to see her ; but I was thankful when the visit 
 was over, and although I went again many times, and tried my 
 very best to treat her kindly and even affectionately, I could 
 never get over the painful feelings which agitated my mind 
 when in her presence. 
 
CH-APTER XXXVII. 
 
 feEALITIES OF POLYGAMIC LIFE:— ORSON PRATT : THE STORY 
 OF HIS YOUNG ENGLISH WIFE. 
 
 Peculiar Position of Plural Wives — The Troubles of a Pretty Young Welsh Girl 
 —The Story of Orson Pratt and His Young Wife— The "Champion erf 
 Polygamy "— rThe Wife of an Apostle — Leaving a Mother and her Babes to 
 Starve — The Neglected Wife — Destitute and Forsaken — Attacked by Fever 
 —The Wretched Wife Loses her Senses — She Wanders Forth Upon the 
 Prairie with her Babes — The Good Deeds of Brother Kelsey and his Wife 
 —They Clothe and Feed the Poor Wife— The " Philosopher " and his dying 
 Wife— He Takes Matters Comfortably—" It is Too Late, Orson; Too Late !" 
 Another Victim to Polygamy — How a Wife's Rocking-chair was Stolen — 
 How a Good Brother Whipped His Little Wife — Whence Come the Elders" 
 Wives— Dupes from the Old World—" Gone East .'"—His other " Home"— 
 The Advent of Three Little Babies— Why I Blame those Men. 
 
 I DO not think that Polygamic wives feel the anomalies and 
 cruelties of the " Celestial Order " half so keenly as the first 
 Tjvives, or they would never enter into it. 
 
 The position of the plural wives — second, third, fourth, or 
 twentieth, it matters not — is but a mockery, after all ; and in 
 ipany respects they are more to be pitied than the first wives. 
 The first wives have known, if only for a little while, a hus- 
 band's love and care ; but that has never been felt by the 
 second wives. They are, in fact, in many respects little 
 hotter than slaves ; arid if they are sensitive girls, their posi- 
 tion musi; be extremely painful, for they must realise at all 
 times that they are receiving the attentions of another 
 
520 TROUBLES OF A PRETTY WELSH GIRL. 
 
 woman's husband; and in many instances they are even 
 afraid to be seen speaking to their husband for fear of 
 bringing down the wrath of the first wife upon their heads. 
 Others, who are not so sensitive, assert their own rights and 
 are defiant. 
 
 I am well acquainted with a pretty young Welsh girl who 
 was a second wife. Her husband had converted her to Mor- 
 monism while he was on a mission to Europe, and, when they 
 reached Salt Lake, he married her. I saw her first two years 
 after her marriage, when one day she came to me in the great- 
 est distress. She asked me if I would give her some employ- 
 ment, and, greatly surprised at the request, I asked her how 
 she came to need anything to do, as I knew her husband could 
 well afford to support her. 
 
 " I have left my husband," she answered, " for I could stan4 
 no longer the ill-treatment that I received. I endured it 
 until, as you see, my health is failing and I am broken-hearted. 
 The creature I married has no manhood in him. He has 
 allowed me to be treated like a slave, and has himself half- 
 starved me and has acted towards me with the greatest in- 
 humanity. When I married him," she said, " I was willing to 
 make myself useful in the family, and I did so. But one thing , 
 after another was given me to do until I became a regular 
 drudge — they would not have dared to treat a hired girl in the 
 way they treated me. I was put into a miserable little back 
 room, and was never allowed to see any of my friends ; I had 
 to work early and late. When at last my position would not 
 admit of my working quite so much, they punished me with 
 all sorts of petty unkindnesses, and nearly starved me, giving 
 me only a little flour or a few potatoes every day, 
 
 " At last," she continued, " I went to Brother Brigham to 
 know what I should do. He sent for my husband and talked 
 to him a long time, and he promised to do better if I would 
 go back with him.. Brother Brigham counselled me to do 
 so, and try him again ; and I went. Soon after that, my 
 babe was born, and then they treated me with worse iin- 
 kindness." 
 
"THE CHAMPION OF POLYGAMY!" 52 1 
 
 *' Who do you mean by they ?" I asked. 
 
 " I mean my husband and his wife," she replied ; " They 
 did not seem to look upon me as a wife at all, and, even in the 
 coldest mornings and immediately after my child was born, 
 they used to make me get up first and light fires and pre- 
 pare breakfast and begin work generally, and I was only too 
 glad if I escaped with a little fault-finding. I stood it as 
 long as I could, because Brother Brigham had counselled 
 me to do so ; but now I have left them again and do not 
 mean to return."^ This was the story of one poor girl's 
 troubles. 
 
 Now the man who did this is a good Mormon in good 
 standing in the Church to-day. He is employed by the 
 authorities and his poor young wife is now working for the 
 Gentiles — a much happier woman, if her face speaks truly, 
 since her separation, although she has to support herself and 
 child. She, like hundreds of other young girls, came to Utah 
 without friend or relative, and this is how a good brother 
 " took care " of her. 
 
 But I must be permitted to relate a still more painful story 
 — the story of a poor innocent girl allured from her happy 
 home in England by one of the most distinguished of the 
 Mormon Apostles ; brought over by him to Utah as his wife, 
 and there suffered to die in misery and neglect. 
 
 The Apostle Orson Pratt, who is called among the Saints 
 " The Champion of Polygamy," — a man who has devoted his 
 life to Mormonism, and whose writings have done more than 
 the labors of all the other Apostles to win converts to Poly- 
 gamy ; a man who on more than one occasion has boldly stood 
 up against many of the absurdities and blasphemies of Brig-" 
 ham Young ; a man upon whom, on account of his independ- 
 ence, Brigham has frowned, and who has consequently never 
 attained to the wealth of his more obsequious brethren ; a 
 man who in all the ordinary affairs of life would command the 
 respect of every one around him. — This was the man who per- 
 petrated the atrocious villainy which I am about to relate ; 
 and much against my own personal inclinations I feel com- 
 
522 DESTITUTE AND FORSAKEN. 
 
 pelled to tell the story, as it shows how shockingly this 
 debasing system can pervert an otherwise upright mind. 
 
 Orson Pratt married the young girl of whom I speak, in 
 Liverpool, by special dispensation from Brigham Young, and 
 her parents — themselves devout Mormons — thought that 
 their daughter was highly honored in becoming the wife of an 
 Apostle. She was very pretty and attractive, and for a time. 
 he paid great attention to her, and brought her over to Utah 
 as his bride. Arrived there he utterly neglected her, and she 
 experienced all the horrors of polygamic life. 
 
 The Apostle was living in Salt Lake City. He had left his- 
 young wife and her children in Tooele-^a place about forty 
 miles distant. There they lived in a wretched little log-cabin,, 
 the young mother supporting her little ones as best she could. 
 When her last child was born she was suffering all the miser- 
 ies of poverty, dependent entirely upon the charity of her 
 neighbors. At the time when most she needed the gentle 
 sympathy of her husband's love that husband never came to 
 see her. 
 
 One morning there was literally nothing in the house for 
 herself and her children, who, knowing nothing of their 
 mother's sufferings, cried to her for bread. 
 
 The poor mother quieted them with a promise that they 
 should soon have something to eat, and then she went and 
 begged a few potatoes from a neighbor ; and upon these they 
 subsisted for three days. She then took her children with 
 her, for they were too young to be left alone — her babe was 
 only three weeks old — and she went round to see if she could 
 get work of any kind to do. In this she was not successful ; 
 and at length, worn out by continual anxiety and privation, 
 and heart-broken by the neglect which she had experienced, 
 she sank beneath a fever which promised very soon to prove 
 fatal. 
 
 For some time the neighbors nursed her ; but they, ol 
 course, had their own families to attend to, and could not give - 
 her quite all their time, and thus occasionally she was left 
 alone. One evening, when such was the ease, she got up in a 
 
THE "philosopher" AND HIS DYING WIFE. 523 
 
 state of delirium, and barefooted, and almost destitute of 
 clothing, took her children, and wandered forth with them 
 into the snow. The good people of Tooele went out over the 
 prairie, anxious to find and bring back the poor maniac, but 
 for a long time their search was in vain. At last, not know-' 
 ing whither she went, she wandered to the house of Brother 
 Eli B. Kelsey — a " vile apostate " as Brigham Young would 
 call him ; but known to every one else. Saint, Apostate, or 
 Gentile, as one of the best and kindest-hearted men that ever 
 lived. In Brother Kelsey's house, she and her little ones were 
 kindly received by him and his good wife — from whose lips I 
 first heard this painful story^and their wants attended to. 
 They were clothed and fed, and were then carried back to the 
 log-cabin which they called their home. 
 
 Next day the Mormon Bishop of Tooele assembled the 
 people, and money was collected ' and sent to Salt Lake City, 
 to Orson Pratt, begging him to come immediately, if he wished 
 to see his wife alive. But the Apostle did not come. At 
 that time he was actually engaged in taking another bride; 
 and he wanted to hear nothing of his dying wife. 
 
 Then the good Bishop sent a young man, who rode all 
 night, to compel him immediately to take the coach fo.f 
 Tooele — the young man paying his fare so that he might 
 have no excuse. Then, at last, he came. 
 
 Arrived at the little town where his poor wife lay dying, 
 Orson conducted himself like the philosopher he professes to 
 be. Before him stood the hovel, within which were his 
 deserted little ones^ — wailing, as if sensible of the great loss 
 of a mother's care which they would soon have to sustain ; — 
 and there, on her dying bed, was that poor wife and mother 
 tossing in wild delirium. But he, the cause of all that woe, 
 passed by that wretched hovel and its death-scene to the com- 
 fortable home of a well-to-do brother, at whose house he first 
 obtained his supper, and then calmly returning, entered the 
 place where his wife was lying, and for a moment surveyed 
 the scene. Then he quietly remarked to one of the sisters 
 present: "She has a good deal of fever." 
 
524 "TOO late!" 
 
 Another sister who stood by, impulsively exclaimed, "Good 
 God! — Brother Pratt, this is more than fever — she is dying." 
 
 "Oh dear, no, sister;" he calmly replied, "she will recover." 
 
 It was evident, however, to all but Orson that his wife was 
 dying, and that no earthly power could save her. 
 
 The next day she was still raving, and it was told me that 
 in her wild frenzy she even attempted to strangle her babe. 
 Orson essayed to hold her, but she caught his gold chain and 
 snapped it in two. His touch and the sight of the chain recalled 
 her for a moment to her senses, and she said reproachfully — 
 "You are puffed up with pride, Orson, with your gold chain 
 and rings, while you leave me and my babes to starve. Poor 
 little lambs! where are they.'" 
 
 For a moment the yearning of a mother's heart for her 
 children conquered the fever that tortured her mind, and she 
 listened to her husband's attempted words of comfort, as he 
 said, "I am with you now Eliza, and I will take care of you." 
 
 Steadily^ for a moment, she looked up into his face, and, with 
 tears in her eyes, said mournfully: "It is too late, Orson^It is 
 too late!" 
 
 These -were the last sane words which she uttered in this 
 life, although she still lingered on insensible. 
 
 The next morning, the Apostle Pratt resolved to leave for 
 Salt Lake City and his young bride. The Bishop, however, 
 called a council and summoned him to remain until his wife 
 was dead. Nevertheless he did not wish to stay, and, being 
 an Apostle, he overruled the council. At the last moment 
 before his intended departure, one of the sisters said : '• Brother 
 Pratt, should she die, what shall we do with her?" 
 
 "Oh, she won't die," he replied. 
 
 " But should she," the sister urged. 
 
 "Then bury her with her children," he answered. 
 
 After much solicitation, he was prevailed upon to remain for 
 a few hours, and the next morning his wife died. The lan- 
 guage of her last moments, as she raved and tossed in mad 
 delirium, showed how terrible had been her mental agony, and 
 how much she had suffered from this frightful system. 
 

 ill: 
 
 « '''I- 
 
 i 
 
 ■» 
 
A MODEL HUSBAND. 527 
 
 But one might easily fill a large volume with stories quite 
 as cruel as this. It is simply absurd to expect that it should 
 be otherwise. Men and women can train and discipline their 
 minds, they can crush out the' affections of their hearts if they 
 will; but no effort of man can change man's nature entirely 
 or root out altogether humanity from the soul. Women may 
 endure, as that poor woman did whose story I have just related, 
 but they never can get perfectly adapted to the system of 
 "Celestial Marriage." The nearer they approach to its require- 
 ments, the further tl^y recede from all that is held good and 
 noble in womanhood, and as for the men, they are brutalised 
 by every effort which they make to conform with it. 
 
 During the summer, about three years ago, a young-looking 
 woman, very shabbily dressed, came frequently to my house 
 with heavy baskets of fruit which she entreated me to buy. 
 One day she said: "You do not remember me. Sister Sten- 
 house, 1 think, and I do not wonder for I am so changed. I 
 have to work very hard now, for all I have to live upon is what 
 I can make by selling fruit, or any little work that I can get 
 my neighbors to give me to do ; and if my husband could pre- 
 vent even that I believe he would. I am obliged to gather 
 my fruit at night and hide it from him, and that is why I 
 urged you so to buy, for I never know when I may meet 
 him." 
 
 I was very much surprised at this, as her husband, I knew, 
 was getting a good salary, and appeared to be a most gentle- 
 manly man. His first wife, I was aware, had left him — it was 
 said, on account of cruelty and neglect — and he had married 
 this one just after her arrival from England. I had every 
 reason to believe that she had been a good wife to him, and a 
 mother to his motherless children ; but he had taken another 
 wife since he married her and had cruelly neglected this poor 
 woman, leaving her his first wife's children to take care of. 
 She said that he was again paying his addresses to another still, 
 and she expected that he would soon marry her. And yet 
 this woman [his second wife] told me that all he had left for 
 her and the children to live upon was a sack of bran and 
 32 
 
528 A REASON FOR WHIPPING A WIFE. 
 
 about fifty pounds of corn meal. Everyl^iing- else had been 
 taken to the third wife, even to the best articles of furniture.- 
 
 She said: "One evening I had been sitting in theporch in. 
 my foeking-chair, when he came in and remained about an 
 hour. As soon as he left, I went out to bring^ in the chair, 
 and was just in time to see him carrying it off ;^ I' knew where 
 he was going with it." I saw this poor woman frequently, and 
 bought her fruit often when I did not need it, for it grieved 
 me to see her carrying such heavy loads in her then delicate 
 situation. After a time I lost sight of her, and then I heard 
 that she was dead. One day her own daughter, — for she was 
 a widow when she married this man, — ^came to me before; 
 leaving the city. " I am going away to some friends," she 
 said, "for I will never live near that man — he killed my 
 mother ; he kicked her so severely that she never recovered, 
 and when her child was born, they both died from the effects 
 of the blows which she had received— and I hate him." 
 
 Nothing was ever done to this man — his wife was his own 
 property. He is still regarded as a good Mormon; and when 
 he went to Washington, about two years ago. he took with 
 him letters of recommendation from the leading men in the 
 Ghurch, and the Washington papers spoke of him as being a 
 very gentlemanly and intelligent man. I would give his name, 
 but that I hardly think it would be fair to single him out from 
 his brethren, of so many of whom T could tell just as shame- 
 ful stories. My Mormon friends, however, will know very well 
 of whom I speak. 
 
 Another first wife of one of the Mormon authorities told 
 me how her husband whipped her because she would not 
 consent to his stripping their home of everything that was 
 either useful or handsome in order to furnish a house for' his 
 second wife. Finally he shut her up while he took her entire 
 , parlor furniture away. She was a fragile little woman and 
 perfectly helpless when in the power of a strong man, and 
 therefore was forced to submit, as there was no appeal to law 
 in Utah. 
 
 It is a very difficult thing for a woman after listening, day 
 
"HE COULD jbST AS WELL MARRY HIMSELF!" ^2^ 
 
 after day, to such tales 6i woe and misery, and knowing them 
 to bte true, to retain much respect for a polygamist, whoever 
 he may be. For my own part I regard them all with such 
 feelings of loathing — for I cannot forget my own sufferings — 
 that I can hiardly speak civilly of them, and would prefer never 
 to speak to them. I know scores of ladies — married ladies— 
 Mormon ladies; who in secret feel and speak just as I do upon 
 this subject. 
 
 For many years pist, the American Elders have derived a 
 rich harvest from Britain, and Scandinavia. After the intro- 
 duction of Polygamy, an Elder was seldom known to return 
 from mission without bringing with him one, two, and some- 
 times three young girls, or else arranging in some way for 
 their emigration. The Missionaries, however, preferred, when- 
 ever it was possible, to bring the girls with them, for if they 
 trusted them to the care of a brother returning before or after, 
 he very frequently turned traitor, and carrited off the prize 
 himself. 
 
 The Elders were not permitted to marry these extra wives 
 while on, or returning from, a mission, unless they had special 
 permission from Brigham Young. But quite a number of the 
 poor weak brethren were so impulsive and so anxious to be 
 married, that they could not wait for the ceremonies of the 
 Endowment House. One conscientious Swiss brother, named 
 • lioba, who could find no one willing to take the responsibility 
 of marrying him while crossing the Plains, said that as he was 
 an Elder he could just as well marry himself, and be under no 
 obligation to anybody; and he did so. He had fallen in love 
 with a little miss — a mere child, about one quarter of his own 
 age. 
 
 Many men have married wives, and have brought them 
 home, before their first wives knew even that they were iri 
 love. They had not had courage to intrbduce the subject, but 
 believed that when the wife fbund that it was done and could' 
 not be undone, she would see the usdessness of feeling badly, 
 and Would soon get over it. But no wife who has been thus 
 treated ever did " get over it" What can a man know of 
 
530 KEEPING "COVENANTS," 
 
 woman's nature who would dare to act thus towards her, and 
 think that she would become reconciled to such treatment ? 
 
 What strange ideas the Mormon men must have of woman's 
 nature if they believe that women can submit to such treat- 
 ment as this and still love them ! What folly to think even 
 of love ! Can they not discover, if by nothing else, by the 
 changed manner, the almost cold indifference, of those who 
 were once gushing over with affection, whose winning and 
 endearing ways captivated their hearts — that something must 
 be wrong — that love has ceased to exist in the hearts of their 
 wives, and that a cold, stern sense of duty and religious obli- 
 gation has taken its place ? 
 
 It would be very wrong for me to say that there are no men 
 who try to be just in the practice of Polygamy, for I know 
 many who try their very best to act impartially to all their 
 wives, but this is not really the result of their religion about 
 which some of these men appear to care very little. I feel 
 sure that if they are good men, notwithstanding the evil 
 effects of Mormonism upon them, they would have been much 
 better men without it. 
 
 On the other hand, I have known men who, before they 
 became Mormons, were reputed good husbands and fathers, 
 but who afterwards became cold and harsh in their natures, 
 cruel to their wives, and neglectful to their children, — it 
 seemed as if they thought of nothing else but courting the girls, 
 and taking more wives, altogether regardless as to ^whether 
 they could support them or not. 
 
 Some of the Elders, finding that they might not marry 
 plural wives before they reached Utah, have bound the foreign 
 girls by solemn vows and covenants to marry them when they 
 arrived in Salt Lake Valley; and the poor girls, believing, 
 that because these men were Missionaries, all they said and 
 did must be right, have often — in fact, in almost every 
 instance — to their own great injury, kept their " covenants " 
 and married the men to whom they were vowed. I havp 
 known personally and intimately several sisters who have in 
 this way ruined their prospects and blighted the hopes of 
 
. •particular friends." 531 
 
 their whole lives, and sadder stories than theirs could not be 
 told. 
 
 t 
 
 My husband had again left Salt Lake City, and had gone to 
 ," the States," — as we then called " going East ;" for it was 
 such a long journey that we felt ourselves altogether out of 
 the pale of civilisation. I felt, therefore, comparatively free ; for 
 I could now, whenever I desired to do so, walk out, or visit a 
 friend, without the constant dread of meeting him and his 
 wife. It always humiliated me to see them together, although 
 I believed that it was perfectly right that my husband should 
 show attentions to his other wife. It was not now jealousy 
 that I felt — the day of jealous feeling was long past ; — I felt 
 disgusted, and I was humbled at the sight of them. At one 
 time, for nearly six months I remained at home, never going 
 further than my own garden, — simply for the reason that I 
 feared to meet /ter in the presence of any of my friends — 
 particularly any of my Gentile friends ; or worse still, with 
 /lim. I felt sure that, had we met, I should have tried to 
 avoid them or have passed them by unnoticed, which would, 
 of course, have been an insult, and would have caused re- 
 marks from strangers, and ill feeling, which, of all things, I 
 felt most anxious to avoid. 
 
 There is no privacy in a polygamic family where the wives 
 live together, and very little indeed when they live in sepa- 
 rate hotises ; for each wife finds pleasure in telling all the 
 little weaknesses of the other wives to her own " particular 
 friends," — and those "particular friends," in turn tell ikeir 
 " particular friends," until in due course it becomes known to 
 some kind-hearted busybody who considers it her duty to go 
 to the wife whose foibles have thus been bandied about from 
 one to the other, and tell her " how shamefully she has been 
 Slandered." Then it is the poor husband's turn to hear the 
 whole burden of trouble, — never, of course, exaggerated in the 
 least, — and he is expected to make peace, if he can, among his 
 numerous wives. 
 
 Perhaps all this fuss has been caused by the husband 
 
,532 A HUSBAND IN TROUBI^E. 
 
 himself— he never intending it, all the tisine. Not unlikely he 
 gave a new dress or some article of wearing apparel to one 
 wife or her children, and the others have noticed it. > It may 
 be that, perhaps, he did not think that the others needed it, 
 and prohably they did not ; but that does not matter in the 
 least. Jealous wives do not stop to consider such a trifle as 
 that. The poor man is told that he must be just and fair to 
 all, and when he gives a dress to one, he must give dresses to 
 the others ajso, whether he can afford it and they need it, or 
 not 
 
 These wives are lynx-eyed, and each one notices every 
 article of clothing that the others wear ; and, no matter how 
 economical one wife may be, or how extravagant another, the 
 careful one must never look better dressed than her less 
 saving rival, or the husband will certainly be blamed for 
 favoritism. 
 
 After living in Polygamy and observing all these things, I 
 came to the conclusion that the men who tried to act justly 
 were, after all, greatly to be pitied ; and I had no doubt in my 
 mind that many of them would only be too happy to be mono- 
 gamic husbands once again. At one time I believed this of 
 my own husband, fie appeared to be annoyed when " duty " 
 compelled him to leave my home and family circle, and go to 
 his other " home." I half fancied that he had at last come 
 to think that Polygamy was a most unnatural eonditiow 
 of affairs, and that he would be very glad if it were not 
 compulsory. Of course, I drew my own conclusions, but I 
 by and by lound that they were somewhat premature. 
 
 I had supposed that, possibly, his young wife was not so 
 attractive to him now as she had been ; and this I must 
 confess, did not grieve me very much. But, notwithstanding 
 all that, so great had been my fanaticism, that I had still re- 
 maining sufficient faith in the unholy prp.ctice to make me 
 feel that if we expected ever to get a blessing from heaven 
 through compliance with the "celestial" command, it was neces^ 
 sary that my husband should be just to his other wife and 
 treat her kindly and considerately. 
 
"IN THE FOOTSTEPS OF BROTHER BRIGHAM." 533 
 
 A? I said before, from the moment when he first selected 
 another wife, his society lost every charm for me, and there- 
 fore I was not so very generous, after all, when I urged him 
 to spend as much time as he possibly could with Belinda. I 
 felt that if I had lo&t everything in this life for Polygamy ; and 
 if Polygamy, after all, by any chance, might turn out true ; I 
 might as well strive to get a little glory in the next world. 
 But, after all, it was but a poor soulless attempt, and so miser- 
 able did I feel that I frequently wished that I could be com- 
 pletely annihilated |fter death. 
 
 My husband's cares were also increasing, for his young wife 
 had already presented him with three daughters. I presume, 
 if at any time she was cross at his long absences, the children 
 were influenced by her spirit, and when my husband did visit 
 her, his reception was probably either too warm or too cool, 
 and, in any case, more lively than suited his quiet tastes. He 
 assured me that he never spoke an unkind word to her, but 
 would listen to all she had to say in a meek and quiet spiriti 
 feeling all the time that she was young and inexperienced. 
 This no doubt was all very well, but what woman can bear to 
 see a man listening quietly to all she has to say, when 
 she herself is in anything but a calm state of mind .' We like 
 men to fee I what we say. 
 
 I have known many husbands ui Polygamy who made it a 
 practice not to say anything to thrir wives when they were re- 
 counting their wrongs, but pr^ifprrad to get up and leave with- 
 out a word — ^showing them Po symj/athy whatever, but teach- 
 ing them, with all that cold indifference which in time chills 
 the most loving heart and silences the voice of affection for 
 ever, what their position really was. 
 
 I have also heard husbands say : " I provide my wife with 
 all she needs or can wish for, and surely she cannot suppose 
 that I will allow her or any other woman to dictate to me as 
 to what I shall do with myself or how I shall spend my time. 
 I shall follow in the footsteps of Brother Brigham, and go 
 where I please, and stay as long as I please, and come back 
 when it suits me." 
 
534 INCOMPATIBILITY. 
 
 The Mormon men are very much to blame in this Tespedt. 
 They take young innocent girls from the warm and happy 
 influence of home, and after a few brief weeks of devotion, 
 they leave them in the cold atmosphere of the world, to battle 
 single-handed with new cares and new duties, to bear sick- 
 ness and solitude with what courage they may, and thus, dis- 
 consolate and alone, go their way into the tangled mazes of 
 life. This the Mormon husbands do, without a thought of 
 the solemn vows they break and the neavy responsibilities 
 which they evade ; for they never for one moment reflect, 
 that if there is incompatibility, it results in most instances 
 from the fact that they have acted worse than foolishly in 
 choosing girls so young and inexperienced that they could not 
 possibly be fit companions for men who might in point of age 
 have been their fathers, and even then have had a very fail, 
 margin of years to spare. 
 
CHAPTER XXXVIII. 
 
 "OUR" HUSBAND'S FIANCEE— K SECOND WIFE'S SORROWS- 
 STEPS TOWARDS APOSTACY. 
 
 A Little Misapprehension — My Husband's TCingdpm — The chosen Maiden — 
 The Prophet's daughter, Zina — Reviewing a Lady-Love — A Strange Consulta- 
 tion — The Accepted Lover — Love of no ordinary Kind — "Something very 
 BeautituI " — "'He never loved Before" — Progressive Affection — Why Zina 
 pitied Us—" Our Husband ! " — Sorrows of a Second Wife : Belinda in 
 Trouble— A Pleasant "Duty!"— The Flirting in the Prophet's Parlor- 
 Wavering Faith — The " Revelation " Criticised — Homoeopathic Religion — The 
 Book ol Mormon condemns Polygamy ! — A very Questionable " Prophet " — 
 Belinda's Bereavement— Accused of Favoring the Gentiles — Lover's Quarrels 
 — A Long Courtship — " If one girl wont, another will ! " — Steps towards 
 Apostacy. 
 
 AT one time, as I have already stated, I had almost begun 
 to think that my husband had seen enough of the dis- 
 comforts and heartlessness of polygamic life, and that his eyes 
 were looking back wishfully to the time when, as the old Scotch 
 ballad says : 
 
 " One loving heart was all his own, 
 But there as king he reigned supreme." 
 
 My faith in my own acuteness and perception was, however, 
 very considerably shaken when one day he told me that he 
 thought it was about time for hinj to think of taking another 
 wife. I suppose he expected that I should express some aston- 
 ishment or offer objections,, for he proceeded to give me 
 
536 QUITE A DISTINGUISHED YOUNG LADY ! 
 
 excellent reasons for what he was about to do. — His greatly 
 improved circumstances ; his desire to sustain his brethren ;, 
 and, above all, the necessity that he should " build up a king- 
 dom!" , 
 
 There was no gainsaying all this. The Lord had certainly 
 very greatly blessed him in basket and in store ; it was, more- 
 over, praiseworthy in him to wish to sustain his brethren ; and 
 nobody could deny that he ought to have a " kingdom ! " To 
 crown all, the young lady whom he proposed to honor this 
 time could not possibly be objected to by any loyal Saint, for 
 she was of the seed royal of the rnqdern Israel — a daughter 
 of the high-priestly house of Brigham Young ! 
 
 I suppose, if I had been a right-minded woman, I shoujd 
 have felt the great glory that there was in this proposed alliance.* 
 But, in point of fact, such is the perversity of human nature, 
 I did not feel at all pleased, although I could say nothing ifl 
 objection. I had had some slight suspicion that my husband's 
 eyes, to say nothing of his heart, had lately befen inclined to 
 wander in a certain direction, for he had become so particularly 
 regular in his attendance at the theatre. I mentioned the 
 matter to him once or twice, but he answered, that as an edi- 
 tor it was a matter of necessity for him to attend, and that he 
 ought to be there always. This I ijiigbt, perhaps, have believed, 
 had it not been that it was now several years since his paper 
 was first established, and hitherto his personal attendance at 
 every representation had not been considered absolutely indis- 
 pensable — reporters had been able to do all that was necess^y. 
 
 His proposal to marry this young lady, now it was openly 
 stated, shed light upon many things which had before appeared 
 to me rather obscure. Her name was Zina, and she was the 
 daughter of Mrs. Zina D. Huntington Jacobs, whom I have 
 a.lready mentioned as one of the Prophet's wives. She was 
 one of the actresses in the theatrer-rfor many of Brighajfti's 
 daughters at that time tooi part in the representations — aijd I 
 had frequently observed very pretty little notices of her in the 
 Salt Lake Daily Telegraph. Sometimes it had occurred to me 
 that these notices were not quite merited, for other actresses 
 
A CURIOUS C.ONSULTATION. 537 
 
 in the same play had really appeared more proficient ; but that, 
 of course, was only my own private opinion. Somehow or 
 other, my husband's opinion seemed always to clash with mine 
 whenever there was a lady in the question ; and in this case I 
 had again and again differed from him in opinion concerning 
 this same young lady, long b^ore I suspected that he had a 
 more thfn friendly interest in her. 
 
 Strange as it would have appeared to any one unused to the 
 ivays and works of IVf ormon Polygamy, my husband consulted 
 me about the m^ttec ; and it was agreed that he should pro- 
 pose to the lady in question. I offered little objection, except 
 petitioning that I thought he would have quite as well fulfilled 
 the commands of God if he had takeo an older and plainer- 
 looking wife. These things are generally fully determined 
 before any mention of the matter is made to the first wife, and 
 opposition on her part is seldom of any avail. Besides which, 
 I did not much care now how many wives my husband took,-^ 
 Jie might as well have twenty, as the one too many which he 
 .already had, — his marriage to another could not possibly make 
 me feel any worse, provided I was- not compelled to associate 
 with her. I had resplved that I would never live on familiaf 
 tprms with his other wives^ — not because I might disrespecjt 
 or dislike them personally, but because I could not overcome 
 the purer and better tpacbings of my early life. 
 
 My husband in due form proposed, and was accepted ; and 
 it was soon rumored abroad that he was going to marry one of 
 the " President's " daughters,-^Brigham is always spoken of as 
 " President " Young among th^ Saints. In the course of a 
 day or two they were formally " engaged," and a more loving 
 couple could not possibly have been found. The young lady 
 herself afterwards told me that their love was of no ordinary 
 kind ; and I'm sure I did npt doubt her word. But consider 
 how pleasant such intelligence must have been to a wife ! 
 
 Zina's friends who wished to cheer me up and make me 
 happy, told me that my husband's love for her was perfectly 
 engrossing, they " thought he could never have really loved.be- 
 fore " — thqre was something very be^ytif ul in their loves ! " { 
 
538 "he never really loved before!" 
 
 need hardly say that I saw these things in quite another light 
 Of course, <l?hen I saw the letters which were constantly pass- 
 ing to and fro, — brought to my house by persons who evidently 
 knew they were bearers of missives of love, — and when I 
 witnessed their effect upon my husband, and saw such anxiety 
 evinced that / should not see them, I did not for a moment 
 doubt their affectionate devotion to each other, but I must ad- 
 mit that to me there was very little " beauty" in it. 
 
 The young lady, I believe, regarded my husband's second 
 wife and myself with a great deal of sympathy ; for she thought 
 that, however affectionate he might have been' to us, she was 
 his first real love. It is a most astonishing fact, that if a 
 Mormon man has ten, fifteen, or even twenty wives, he will be 
 certain, when courting the twenty-first, to make her believe 
 that "he never really loved before;" and then, if afterwards 
 he took a twenty-second, you may be quite sure that she too 
 -would be persuaded, or would persuade herself, into a belief in 
 the very same statement. With the last wife, it is always an 
 article of .faith that she is the husband's first and only love. 
 It is a curious question : — If a man of many wives starts with 
 as much love for his first wife as ordinary one-wifed men have 
 for theirs, and goes on increasing his love with each addition^ 
 wife, so that he can always say to the last that "he never really 
 loved before ; " how much love will he have when he gets to 
 the tenth or the twentieth .' At that rate, Brigham, who in 
 the course of his life has had — say, thirty wives, must have a 
 " 30-love " power of affection for the last. The extent of his 
 devotion must be something utterly astounding ; by this time 
 the old man must be a perfect Vesuvius of love ! 
 
 Zina pitied us, I know, when she realised that we could never 
 know the great depth of our husband's love for her. She 
 spoke and acted as if this were how she felt ; and I have no 
 doubt that she intended, after her marriage with our husband, 
 to treat us with great kindness and consideraition, as a sort of 
 "reconiperise for what we never had truly known, and never could 
 know now— our husband's love! This was very kind, certainly, 
 ■t»ut I fear it was not at all appreciated by' Belinda or myself. 
 
MISS ZINAS OPINION.. 539 
 
 As is almost always the case when the husband takes a third 
 
 wife, a better state of feeling was brought about between my 
 
 own husband's second wife and myself. Belinda no longer 
 
 centred all her jealousy in me, and I, of course, had to divide 
 
 mine. She now, to a certain extent, began to realise what I 
 
 had suffered when my husband courted her ; she felt badly, 
 
 and I really did sympathise with her when I remembered how 
 
 young she was and that she was the, mother of three little 
 
 children. She had her moiety of a husband, it is true ; but, 
 
 like all other polygamic wives, that was her misfortune rather 
 
 than her comfort or strength. Many a wife would be happier 
 
 were she a widow ; in fact, widows are the happiest class of 
 
 women in Utah, for they realise that it is far better to have a 
 
 dead sorrow than a living one. 
 
 Now, our husband always maintained that he was not in 
 
 . love with Miss Zina, but that in making love to her he was 
 
 acting entirely from principle. So all the brethren say ; and I 
 
 have never yet heard of any one of them ever confessing — 
 
 except, of course, to the maiden herself — that he was in love. 
 
 To the maiden herself he says, not only that, but a great deal 
 
 more. But if our husband, at the time of which I speak, was 
 
 not in love, the saints forbid that I should ever see him in that 
 
 condition! I am sure when I heard his fianc6e speaking of 
 
 their devotion to each other, and of the fond attachment of 
 
 her heart to him (for she felt no delicacy in speaking to me — 
 
 his wife — about such matters,) I came to the conclusion that 
 
 I had never known what it was to really love, and -that my 
 
 nature was too crude and unrefined to understand the mysteries 
 
 of the tender passion. There was no love in the case, our 
 
 husband repeatedly told us — all pure duty! — There are some 
 
 men, especially among the Mormons, and at certain times, who 
 
 find this kind of "duty" quite a pleasure. 
 
 Long courtships had become quite fashionable among the 
 brethren in Salt Lake City, and I dreaded a long courtship 
 more than anything else, for there is so much that is humilia- 
 ting, and I might even say disgusting, to a wife when her hus- 
 band is engaged in love-making to another woman, that I 
 
S40 NOT THE ONLY ONE. 
 
 hoped, as much as possible, to be spared passing through sufeh 
 an .ordeal a second time. 
 
 As the accepted lover and affianced husband of Brother 
 Brigham's daughter, our husband was, of course, constantly in 
 attendance at the Prophet's house. But he was not the only 
 good brother who spent his evenings in Brigham Young's 
 parlor ; for it was then — and I suppose it is to-day — a regular 
 rendezvous for middle-aged and young men, and even boys ; 
 and there the Prophet's little girls, as well as those who were 
 grown or growing up, obtained an excellent training in the 
 art of flirting and courting. 
 
 It has always been said among the Saints that Brigham's 
 girls and the daughters of Daniel H. Wells were the boldest 
 and least retiring maidens to be found in Salt Lake City, and 
 that they presumed greatly upon their imaginary high posi- 
 tion ; which position nobody but themselves cared anything 
 about. It is well known that the very people upon whom 
 they look down are those who rightly should receive their 
 warmest gratitude and respect, on account of the more than 
 liberal support which they have given to their father, even to 
 the detriment of their own children. But too much must not 
 be expected of young girls brought up in Polygamy. 
 
 When first I heard that my husband had set his affections 
 upon one of these girls, I felt convinced that he could not 
 have made a very wise choice. Men are never very wise in 
 such matters, but when they are influenced by the peculiar 
 motives which actuate the Mormon men they become doubly' 
 silly ; and I could not help dreading that the mere fact of 
 my husband having selected a daughter of the Prophet as his 
 future wife would bring trouble upon us all. What shape that 
 trouble would take, I could form no conjecture, but I felt 
 sure that a change of some sort was fast approaching. My 
 faith was almost gone — I felt the degrading position in which 
 the " Celestial" system placed me and my children, and it 
 seemed to me that I could no longer endure it. My children 
 I could not, and would not, leave, but it was impossible for me 
 to continue to live as I had been living— nor would I think of 
 
" SIMIUA SIMILIBUS COkANrtrR." tf^I 
 
 bringing up my children any long^ to beliieve and live a reli- 
 gion which had so cruelly blighted" all my own life. It was for 
 them that I feared now,^-I felt that for their sake I must 
 break away from this horrible system. 
 
 My own life, I thought, was not worth caring for, but the 
 idea of my little girls - growing up' and following in my 
 footsteps and enduring as I had endtii^, wias' more than I 
 could bear. Something must be doirte' to save them from 
 such a fate. 
 
 About, this time 1 procured a copy of the "Revelation on 
 Celestial Marriage," and read it through carefully and calmly, 
 from beginning to end. The reader may, perhaps,, remember 
 that when a copy of it was first given to me, in Switzer- 
 land, years before, I was so angry and indignant that when 
 I had got only partly through it I cast it from me in disgust 
 as an outrage upon all that was good' and true. From that 
 tittie, although I had heard portions of it quOtfed and read, I 
 had never perused it as a whole. On two Occasions, at'lbast, 
 ifty Mend' Mary Burton was very near reading it through with 
 me, and had we done so, I have not the slightest doubt that 
 my eyes would have been opened to the absurdity and wicked- 
 ness of the whole system, and years of wretchedness' would 
 have been spared me. 
 
 Such, however, was not the case. It w'as not until t had 
 dmost drained the' cup of sorrow and degradation that, at last, 
 Ifound an antidote in the deadly thing itself which had been 
 the source of all my unhappineSs. I was aCtiiig upon' the 
 llbriioeopathic principle — " shnilia similibus curantur" — and 
 using a' dose of poison to cure a disease caused by that 
 poison; — but if the reader has perused' the "Revelation " I 
 think he will admit that it was a pretty big dose for any 
 woman to Swallow. 
 
 As- 1 read, I saw plainly from the "^oorcRn^' of the docu- 
 ment that if ever it was given to Joseph Smith — no matter by 
 whom, it was given long after he hdid' practiced Polygamy — or 
 soihethihg as bad — and to sanction what he had already done, 
 fhad read in the Book of Mormon : 
 
542 WHAT THE PQOK OF MORMON SAYS. 
 
 "David and Solomon truly had many wives and concubines, which thing wai~ 
 an abomination before me saith the Lord. ...... Hearken to the Word 
 
 of the Lord : for there shall not any man among you have, save it be one wife ; 
 and concubines he shall have none." \_Bookof Mormon, p. ii8.] 
 
 In the Book of the Covenants, given through Joseph Smith, 
 and held sacred by every Saint, I had read : 
 
 " Thou shalt love thy wife with all thy heart, and cleave unto her and none 
 else." \Booh of Covenants, p. 124.] 
 
 And yet when I turned to the " Revelation " I found in. 
 the very first clause : 
 
 Verily, thus saith the Lord unto my servant Joseph, that inasmuch as you' 
 have enquired at my hand, to know and understand wherein I, the Lord, 
 JUSTIFIED [!] my servants Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, as also Moses, David 
 and Solomon, my servants, as touching the principle and doctrine of their 
 having many wives and concubines," &c. 
 
 What could I possibly think of a " Prophet " \yho, after 
 having the law laid down sq clearly, and being told so dis- 
 tinctly that the doings of David and Solomon were an " abom- 
 ination," and that a man should have but one wife, should 
 enquire of the Lord how he "justified" the very things which 
 He had just declared were " an abomination" unto him .' — ; 
 Then, too, what blasphemy to represent God as one day 
 givihg a " Revelation " declaring a thing, sinful, and the next 
 day " justifying " it ! I felt perfectly humiliated with myself 
 that I had never before had the courage to look the matter 
 calmly in the face and discover, as I must have discovered, 
 had I only used my unaided reason, the shameful imposture 
 which had been palmed upon us. I now made careful en- 
 quiry, and it was soon clear to me that evidence was not 
 wanting to prove that the doctrine of plural marriages origin- 
 ated in the licentious hearts of Joseph Smith and those asso- 
 ciated with him. When once I was convinced of that, the 
 whole fabric of my religion crumbled before my eyes ; and 
 from that time I Can hardly say that I had faith in anything 
 that had been taught m'e. 
 
 My husband's second wife was also very unhappy now. 
 She, too, after the general rule, had flattered herself that she 
 
BELINDA S CHILD. . 543 
 
 was " his first and only love," and it was not pleasant to have . 
 her dream of happiness dispelled ; but now that another 
 " jewel " was to be added to our husband's crown she could no 
 longer deceive herself. She little knew, poor girl, when she 
 married, that a Mormon's heart is like a honeycomb — 
 there is always a vacant cell wherein another may nestle. 
 
 Real trouble, too,^ she had. — One of her children was taken 
 very sick, and after a severe illness died. I remained with her 
 night and day, and did what I could for the poor child. Had 
 it been possible for^i^me to have felt a greater loathing and 
 detestation for; that vile, system of Polygamy, that feeling 
 would have been conceived while I watched at the bed-side of 
 my husband's dying. child. It was there that I vowed that no 
 Polygamist should ever marry another daughter of mine, and 
 resolved that to my dying day my voice should be raised, 
 against the unholy and unnatural teachings of the Mormon. 
 Eriesthood. I looked at that lonely young mother, who in her 
 hour of trial ought to have had all her husband's sympathy, , 
 all his attention, to support her ; but who, instead, knew that, 
 however kind he might be to her, he was contemplating a new 
 marriage, and his thoughts must of necessity be more or less, 
 with his purposed bride. All unkind feeling was banished 
 from my heart — I forgot that she was my husband's wife,, 
 and remembered only that, like myself, she was a suffering 
 woman, a victim to a false faith ; and I felt very deeply for 
 her in her time of sorrow and bereavement. 
 
 My husband, at this time, had been a member of the Mor- 
 mon Church for twenty-five years. He had lectured, preached, 
 written and; published, in Great Britain, Switzerland, and the 
 United States, in support of the Mormon faith. He had been 
 a most earnest and consistent member of the Church, and 
 devotedly attached to Brigham Young. This attachment to 
 Brother Brigham he shared in common with all the staunchgst 
 Qf his brethren ; for while the members of the Church retain 
 unshaken confidence in the new r,fvelation, they naturally 
 acquire a great regard for the Prophet, and render him un- 
 33 
 
544' SOME SERIOUS CONSIDERATIONS. 
 
 questioning obedience. I believe that my husband would 
 willingly have laid down his life, if by so doing he could have 
 shielded Brigham Young from harm or have been of essential 
 service to him^ 
 
 But causes were now in operation which, by and by, de- 
 tached him from the Church, and made it possible for me also 
 to leave the Mormon faith. Hitherto; for my children's sake, 
 I dared not leave the Church without my husband, and I 
 therefore anxiously watched for anything which- might rescue 
 him from the bondage in which he was held. 
 
 As proprietor of a daily paper, his business had frequently 
 called him to the Eastern States for several months at a time, 
 atid I observed that after those visits his editorials took a 
 more liberal turn. My Mormon friends frequently said to me, 
 " Brother Stenhouse is doing himself no good by his constant 
 association with the Gentiles ;" and subsequently, when we did 
 apostatise, our secession from the Church was attributed to 
 contaminating Gentile influences. 
 
 Then, too, we had frequent visits from strangers passing 
 through Salt Lake City. I saw, with- pleasure, that this inter- 
 course with the outside world was gradually undermining my 
 husband's confidence in the teachings of the Elders, and it 
 gave me courage to hope that, after all, the day of liberty 
 might dawn at Ikst. Feeling as I did thus, it will not surprise 
 the reader that I regarded with more -and more distrust the^ 
 proposed marriage of my husband to Brother Brigham's 
 daughter ; f or I felt that then he would be deeper than ever in 
 the toils of -the Priesthood, and I sometimes alnaost believed that 
 it was my duty to use every influence in my power to prevent it. 
 
 Putting my own feelings out of the question, it is proba- 
 ble that I might have done this simply for his own good; 
 for I doubted not that some day the scales must fall from 
 his eyes, and then he would be thankful that I had prevented 
 the marriage. Our paths by this time had certainly diverged 
 far asunder, and my husband had another wife and family:; 
 but I believed that he was sincere, though sadly mistaken, 
 or I should not have felt so kindly towards him as I did.' 
 
LOVERS gUARRELS. 545 
 
 At other tiities, dtid observing hi&' devotion, I alriosf mysdf 
 began to think that perhaps the nonsense that I had heard 
 was, after all, true, and that this girl was the only one he had 
 really loved ; and, if so, of course he ought to marry her. In 
 fact, so divided was my attention that I hardly knew what to 
 think ; I therefore resolved to act according to circumstances. 
 
 Brigham Young, in one of his sermons, says that: "The 
 first thing manifested in the case of apostacy was the idea 
 that the Prophet Was liable to make a mistake : when a man 
 believes that, he has.taken the first step towards apostacy ; he 
 nfeed only take one step more, and he is out of the Church." 
 This \(ras spoken of Joseph and his Saints, but it suits just as 
 M^ell Brigham and his : I knew Very well that my husband had 
 taken the first step, aild I sincerely hoped that he might soon 
 take the second. For my, own part, I had for some time, hot 
 only believed that a Prophet might be mistaken, but, as Brother 
 Heber would say, I knew it. 
 
 My husband and his bride elect, like all other lovers, had 
 frequent little quarrels — I suppose for the purpose of making 
 up again, and being then all the more ardent in their affection. 
 But they now had z. disagreement which lasted longer than all 
 that had gone before; although I suppose that neither of them 
 had, at that time, the slightest idea how it was going to end. 
 They had been courting for fifteen months at least, and after 
 so much devotion on the part of my husband, and so much 
 ferveht affection' on the part of the young lady, it really did 
 seem too bad that so large an amount of love should be thrown 
 away. It was hard that after such a long strain upon their 
 religious and devotional feelings — for they were both very 
 pious lovers— all their labor of love should come to nought. 
 Things had certainly taken a twist, for I know well enough 
 that at one time they both firmly believed that their marriage 
 w^s preordained in heaven, and that they were as completely 
 one in feeling as rtiortals ever could be. The mother, too, who 
 was a very piotis woman, once told my husband that she had 
 had a vision in which it was revealed to her that they were 
 destined for each other in the eternd worlds:^- the lovers of 
 
546" "le ONE. won't, another will!" 
 
 course firmly believed her. But, for all that, the estrange- 
 ment still continued, and my husband was constantly making 
 it wider by the articles which appeared in his paper, until at 
 last certain of the sisters whispered that the heart of the lady 
 had been attracted towards some brighter luminary. 
 
 Long courtships often end disastrously ; but when I heard 
 rumors of the lady's presumed faithlessness, it seemed to me 
 hardly fair, for the day had been fixed for the marriage and 
 the wedding-diress actually made. Of course I sympathised 
 with my husband. — Would any wife like to see her husband 
 disappointed in his love-affairs with another woman, I wonder ? 
 
 While under these natural feelings of indignation, I one 
 day told Brigham Young, that I thought, after all the courting 
 that had been done — and it was not a trifle — they certainly 
 ought to be married. He said he was willing enough himselfy 
 if they wished it ; but girls, he said, often changed their minds, 
 and as they could have but one husband, it was only fair that 
 their wishes should be consulted. "If Zina has really changed 
 her mind," he added, " I have plenty of other daughters, and 
 they have all got to be married, let him take one of them, — if 
 one won't, another will ! " The reader will see the liberal ideas 
 which Brother Brigham entertains on the subject of marriage. 
 
 It may, perhaps, seem rather strange that I should be anxious 
 to have them marry; but, after all that I had seen and endured 
 in Polygamy, can it be wondered at that I should no longer 
 regard the father of my children as my own husband .' Had 
 I thought him a bad man, or had he acted as I know 
 many of the good brethren do act; had he brought home girl 
 after girl with the hope of alluring one or more of them into 
 Polygamy, or had he been utterly reckless of my feelings, I 
 might perhaps have been able to cast him from my heaft 
 without a single regret. But I really believed that he was 
 acting consistently with the teachings of his religion, and if I 
 felt degraded by the life I lived, it was not his fault — it was 
 the fault; of. the system. I therefore felt that if things came 
 to the worst, ahd. if I were driven to extremities, and forcied 
 to separate from him, I should like to knoW.that he had a wife 
 
THEN AND NOW. 547 
 
 whom he loved. I felt certain that there was now but little 
 love between him and his second wife, and that some day a 
 separation was sure to take place. The idea of divorce was 
 so repugnant to my feelings that it was only in moments when 
 grief overpowered me, and my heart was wrung with anguish, 
 and I felt utterly reckless, that I for one moment thought of 
 anything like it. Even then I only entertained the idea of a 
 separate life — not divorce. That last resource of the unhappy 
 wife was, however, spared me; and, looking back, I thank 
 God that in His all-wise prpvidence He so shaped my life at 
 that time that my husband and myself, no longer disunited by 
 that disgrace to civilisation and Christianity — Polygamy — can 
 now rejoice together that that last step was never taken, and' 
 that no false creed or superstition can ever again divide our 
 interests or our hopes. 
 
 ' Nevertheless, it was strange that the words of my talkative 
 friend should be again verified, and that a second time I should 
 be found persuading my husband to take another wife! 
 
CHAPTER ;§CXXIX. 
 
 SOWE CURIQUS COURTSHIPS— BRIGHAM RUINS OUR fOR- 
 TUJfgS— BELINDA DIVORCES "OyR" HUSBAND. 
 
 Some Curious Courtships—" The Nicest ole 'oman in the Country!"--" Bespoke " 
 Wives — Marrying in Haste — A Woman with Nme Husbands — A Difficult 
 Question — The Autocrat of Utah — Reminding a Husband — Accused of Favor- 
 ing the Gentiles— The "Subjugation of Women" — The Daily Telegraph in 
 Trouble — Removing to Ogden — Brigham Young Resolves to Ruin Us — A 
 Crafty Prophet— The Ruin of Our Fortunes— "It Makes Me a Free Man!" 
 "Our" Husband's Divorce— " Take Care of That Paper "—Inside the 
 Prophet's Office — Signing the Document — A Curious Bill of Divorce — Be- 
 linda — Forming a Resolution — A Sacrifice Worth Making. 
 
 THE reader will see that, setting aside the fact that my 
 husband was already married, there was nothing in his 
 courtships to distinguish them from those of lovers among the 
 Gentiles. 
 
 But all courtships in Utah are not carried on in this fashion. 
 Some of the brethren entirely omit the love-making part, and 
 with them to take a new wife is simply to make a bargain. 
 The better the Saint, the less, as a rule, does he seem to care 
 about the feelings of the woman whom he makes his wife. 
 My husband, however, was still leavened with the fashions of 
 the old world and the days of his youth, and like some of the 
 
" THE rf ICEST OLE 'OMAN IN THE CaUNTRY ! " 549 
 
 f>ther brethren of good standing in S^h Lake City, he fell into 
 Gentile ways instead of keeping to the true style of Mormon 
 courtship. 
 
 I heard of one American Elder who went to the young lady 
 upon whom he had fixed his choice, and without a word of 
 preliminary discourse of an affectionate nature, said : " I've 
 twenty head o' stock, fifty acres o' good land ; got a good log- 
 house, an' the nicest ole 'oman in the country ! — Now, sis, will 
 you have me ?" Whether the fair damsel was dazzled by this 
 alluring picture or not, I am not quite certain, but one would 
 suppose that she ought to have been. 
 
 Now, to balance the Yankee, it is only fair that I should 
 tell you of a certain Englishman who lived in Cache Valley, 
 about a hundred miles from Salt Lake, and who was very anx- 
 ious to find a second wife. He could not get one in the place 
 where he lived, as the girls were all either married, or, as the 
 Mormons say, "bespoke;" so he came to Salt Lake City as a 
 last desperate resort. To the first unmarried girl to whom he 
 was introduced, without a moment's hesitation he proposed in 
 |he following abrupt fashion : 
 
 " Say, sis ! My bishop told me to take a week's holiday, and 
 Gome down here and get a wife. Now, if you don't mind going 
 back with me, I shall start to-morrow morning." 
 
 The neJft morning, at seven o'clock, the young lady was to 
 be seen standing by the Englishman's wagon with a sunbon- 
 net on her head and a bundle under her arm. They went to 
 the Endowment House, got sealed for all eternity, and started 
 for home. Hundreds of girls in Utah have been won "for all 
 eternity" with just as little trouble. They must have been 
 girls of rather more than average mortal intelligence, if in the 
 time taken to form their decision they could tell from the little 
 they jknow of the men who had proposed to them, that they 
 would be willing to live with them "for time ;" but to make a 
 bargain for "eternity" with so little ground to rest upon, 
 certainly does seem a little rash. 
 
 The Mormons, of all people, with their peculiar notions 
 respecting the eternity of the marriage contract, should be 
 
J550. "sealed" xoAVA^^ husbands! 
 
 careful whom they marry, But> to tell the truth, they are the 
 most careless. 
 
 There is living in Utah, to-day, a woman whom I know, who 
 has been sealed "for all eternity'' to no less than nine hus- 
 bands; and if the divorces which she has obtained arc, as 
 Brother Brigham says, not worth the paper upon which they 
 are written, she will be likely to have some trouble when she 
 meets them all in another world. I know of several others 
 who have been sealed to four, five, or six husbands! One of 
 Brigham's own sisters was the wife of several husbands after 
 this fashion. How all these matters can be set right it is 
 difficult to determine, but somebody will have work to do. 
 . Mormonism had been, to my husband, everything. It had 
 for years grown with his growth, until it had become a part of 
 himself. Doubts had occasionally crept into his mind, it is 
 true, but it required time to effect a change. The measures 
 adopted by Brigham Young in the spring of 1869, for the 
 purpose of controlling the commerce of Utah, as well as the 
 property and faith of the people, caused great discontent; 
 The teachings of the Tabernacle were wild and arrogant, and 
 Brigham assumed that it was his right to dictate in every- 
 thing, " even," he said, " to the setting up of a stocking or the 
 ril;>bons which a woman should wear." Many of the people, 
 when they heard these words and witnessed the fanaticism 
 created thereby, were aroused to opposition, but Brigham only 
 became more fierce in his denunciations and more harsh in- 
 his measures. 
 
 I could plainly see that all this had the, to me, much 
 desired effect of alienating my husband from Mormonism, and' 
 I never allowed an opportunity of strengthening the impres- 
 sion thus produced to pass unimproved. The articles in his 
 paper showed the condition of his mind, and brought down 
 upon him the wrath of Brigham; At this also I rejoiced, and 
 did not fail to make him feel that he ought to resent the 
 Prophet's interference. Brigham felt too cerfain of the sub- 
 mission of his slave, and accused Mr. Stenhouse ot havmg 
 published favorable notices of -Gentile, stores, also of having 
 
"THE SUBJUGATION OF WOMEN." 55 1 
 
 their advertisements in his paper, and otherwise ; aiding and 
 abetting the wicked Gentiles.^all which accusations my hus^ 
 band began to feel was an infringement upon his own private 
 personal rights as a citizen and a man. One circumstance 
 followed another, and I could plainly see that his confidence 
 in Brigham's inspiration was slowly but surely dwindling 
 away, and that the day which I had so long anxiously watched 
 for was breaking at last. Notwithstanding this, however, 
 there was one bond which still united him by no weak tie to 
 the Church-^he was a Polygamist. The contemplated mar- 
 riage between hini and Brigham's daughter could, I believed, 
 never now take place ; but even allowing that, he still had 
 another wife ; and - now that I had entirely lost faith in 
 Mormonism generally, and the " Celestial Order of Marriage ".in 
 particular,. I resolved that I would, no longer have a partner 
 in my husband's affections^as if he were a "joint-stock 
 concern ! " — I would have the whole of a husband, or none. 
 1 had not yet, however, sufficient courage to speak to him of 
 my f eeUngs. 
 
 I can imagine I see some strong-minded woman smile- at 
 the idea of a wife wanting courage to speak to her hiisbandi 
 But such women never knew what Mprmonism is. Had they 
 been born Gentiles, they would probably never have entered 
 the Mormon Church ; had they been born in the Church 
 they would have been what John Stuart Mill calls " subju- 
 gated." John Stuart Mill considered the " Subjugation of 
 Women " among the Gentiles a hard thing, and he wrote a 
 pamphlet and " expressed his mind " about it. But I fancy, if 
 he could have known the iron cruelty of Mormon Polygamy ] 
 if he could have seen how the hearts of women are crushed 
 and ground down by the " Celestial " Order among the 
 Saints, until not a spark of womanhood remains in them ; if 
 he could have seen the " Subjugation of Women " in Utah, 
 he would have considered their case a thousand times harder 
 than that of their Gentile sisters and would never have ceased 
 writing pamphlets or " expressing his mind." 
 
 One Sunday evening, Mr, Stenhouse, when he came home^ 
 
55 2 THE TRIAL OF OUR FAITH. 
 
 said to me : " Broliier Brigham has given me a mission ; he 
 wishes me to go to Ogden and publish my paper there." - 
 
 This was very unexpected news ; but with the vividness of 
 lightning, a glimpse . of what the Prophet intended by such 
 a jstrange proposition flashed across my mind.. " He wishes 
 to ruin us ! " I exclaimed ; " You surely will not go !" 
 
 Now Brigham, of course, knew that my husband's paper 
 had a large circulation in Utah Territory as well as in Salt 
 Lake City, and that his business was in a most prosperous 
 condition ; he knew also that to do aught that might impair 
 or destroy that business, would be to bring misery and 
 disaster upon all who were dependent upon it for their daily 
 bread. And yet, for all that, he told my husband to break up 
 his establishment, or in his own words, to " pull up root and 
 branch," and go to a place where the people were so miserably 
 poor that it was impossible to make a newspaper successful 
 among them. 
 
 In all this the crafty Prophet no doubt acted wisely. The 
 Daily Telegraph would in all probability become a power in 
 the Territory, and he feared that in a short time it would 
 emancipate itself from his control. Brother Brighani has 
 none of the far-seeing perception lof the eagle — that percep- 
 tion which has enabled great men to forecast coming events, 
 and thus, to a great extent, mould them when they came. 
 His is more the cunning, crafty eye peculiar to cats, which 
 axe blinded when the pure light from heaven falls upon them, 
 but are very quick indeed to perceive the very smallest thing 
 which transpires in holes and dark places within their own 
 contracted little circle of vision. No man can be sharper or 
 more quick-sighted than Brigham in his own circle and within 
 range of his own mental powers ; but his circle is limitedj 
 and beyond it his mental powers never soared. 
 
 I do not doubt that, long before this time, he had noted 
 that my husband was weakening in the faith ; but he had 
 waited for his opportunity, and now he considered that it had 
 come. We knew very well that this was the way in which he 
 had always acted towards those whbiin he feared or doubted : 
 
pulliKg up root and branch. 553 
 
 p^hen he saw them growing wssak in the faifh be ruined 
 them, or did the best he could to that effect, before they 
 finally left the Church. I urged my husband to resist this 
 arbitrary decree on the part of the Prophet, and represented 
 strongly the misery which would result from his failure, and 
 the utter impossibility of success. But I soon found that^ 
 though he doubted Brigham, his faith in Mormonisra was by 
 no means all gone — he, like many another, feared that in 
 disobeying Brigham, perhaps, after all, he might be resisting 
 God. He could see the wrongrdoing of the Prophet, and 
 felt that his conduct was unworthy of one who pretended to 
 euch great things ; but he regarded this as the weakness of 
 the Prophet's humanity, at the same time believing that in 
 matters of religion he might be divinely inspired. He was 
 still under the influence of the past— he could not yet break 
 ^nder the yoke, and bid defiance to Brigham and the 
 Priesthood. He told me that now was the time for him to 
 proive his obedience, cost what it might ; and all the brethren 
 urged him to submit, saying that the Lord would overrule 
 everything for his good. 
 
 i, 'Believing this, he broke up his establishment at Salt Lake 
 City, and went, as " counselled," to Ogden. There he re- 
 mained for several months, during which time he was losing 
 money every day. Finding at last that he could stand it no 
 longer, he asked Brigham Young's permission to return and 
 recommence his paper in Salt Lake City, for no one then 
 dared stir a foot without permission. This was granted, for 
 Brigham had now accomplished his purpose. But some of 
 our friends told me that the teachers, when making their 
 weekly visits, were telling the people not to take in Brother 
 Stenhouse's paper again, if he came back to Salt Lake City, 
 for he was apostatising, and they must not sustain an 
 Apostate. Now, I thought, my husband will believe that I 
 was right in my judgment of Brigham's motives. 
 
 My own family and that of the second wife, did not accom- 
 pany my husband to Ogden ; be was therefore quite at home 
 when he returned, but. the. expense of transferring hisbusijuess 
 
554 A FREE MAN again! 
 
 from one place to another was perfectly ruinous. He ha4 
 not only purchased valuable property, as I before mentioned, 
 in the City, but he had also realised quite a comfortable little 
 fortune by the success of his paper ; but now the property 
 had to be mortgaged, and his fortune was, of course, utterly 
 insufficient for these heavy daily losses. Just then, the severe 
 illness of my eldest son, in San Francisco, made it necessar)^ 
 that we should leave immediately to attend him, for we had 
 received intelligence that he was not at all likely to recover. 
 As it was my own son who was sick, my husband had very 
 naturally determined that I should accompany him ■, but this 
 brought on such a severe fit of jealousy on the part of his 
 young wife, who already was by no means too happy> that 
 when we returned, after my son's recovery, she threatened to 
 obtain a divorce. My husband told me of this, but I had so 
 frequently heard such 'threats from wives who were unhappy 
 or neglected that I thought little about it. ,ir. 
 
 One day, not long after our return, I was quite surprised, to 
 see Mr. Stenhouse and Joseph A. Young drive up to the 
 door, looking as if something of great importance had just 
 transpired. Mr. Stenhouse jumped out of his buggy and 
 hurriedly gave me a letter, as I thought, — at the same time 
 saying, " Take great care of this for it makes me a free man 
 again." Saying this, he left the house, jumped into the buggy 
 again, and was gone, while I stood holding the paper, wonder^ 
 ing what it all could mean. 
 
 ■ My husband had told me to "take care" of the paper. He 
 neither said " read it " or " don't read it," and, of course, I was 
 not in the least curious. The envelope was not sealedj so I 
 made up my mind that, though he had not said so, he must 
 have wished me to read what was inside, and at any rate I re- 
 solved to risk doing so. To my astonishment I found that the 
 document which he said set him free, was nothing. else than 
 a bill of divorce between him and his young wife. It appeared 
 a:fterwards that she had been to Brother Brigham, had told 
 him of her grievances, and had asked for a divorce. 
 
 Now when the wife of any maji who is of good standing in 
 
THE "BILL OF DIVORCE": — FEE, TEN DOLLARS! 5^5 
 
 the Church, and whom Brigham wishes to honor, comes to 
 him for a divorce, he generally sends for the husband first, 
 tdls him about it, and they talk it over together. The hus- 
 band is counselled to " make the matter up," and a compro- 
 mise is effected. In the case of my husband, Brigham acted 
 otherwise. The clerk had been directed to make out the pa- 
 pers, which the second wife signed, and, as far as she was con- 
 cerned, her marriage was dissolved. My husband was then 
 notified that he was wanted at the Prophet's office, and he had 
 a very shrewd guess^as to what the nature of the business 
 was for which his presence was desired. He waited till the 
 afternoon when he knew that Brigham would be absent, and 
 then as he was driving out with Joseph A.f the Prophet's son, 
 he drew up before the office and asked Joseph to accompany 
 him inside in order to witness a little business which he had 
 to transact. Joseph agreed ; but' when he found what the 
 business really was, he strongly urged my husband not to 
 sign the papers, or, at least, to take time and consult with 
 President Young first. Mr. Stenhouse, however, never for a 
 moment doubted that Brigham had expected by this hasty 
 move to bring him to his feet, and he would not therefore yield. 
 So, asking the clerk for the papers, he signed them, and Joseph 
 also ; signed them as a witness — the other witness was David 
 Mackenzie, Brigham's clerk. Belinda had already affixed her 
 name. Ten dollars were then handed over as the usual fee ; 
 My husband took, one copy of the ■" bill of divorce," the wife 
 had a right to a second copy, and the third was deposited in 
 the archives of Zion. My husband had then, as we have seen, 
 hastened home to tell me that he was "a free man:" — and yet 
 these two had been " sealed " to each other at the altar in the 
 Endowment House- "for all eternity ! " 
 
 . This is the way that divorces are granted in Utah : — there 
 is not the slightest difficulty about them, if only Brother Brig- 
 ham is willing. The reader would, perhaps, be interested in 
 seeing one of these terrible documents. I therefore append a 
 true, perfect, and exact copy of my husband's own bill of di- 
 vorce. It is a /ac simile — type, signatures, and all; This is 
 
5S6 MY NEW Position. 
 
 a specimen of an orthodok divorce aniong the Von toil in Salt 
 Lake City. Out in the Settlements they do things in a much 
 more primitive style, and some of their documents are rathef 
 amusing. The following is a correct copy of a Mormon di-> 
 vorce bill taken from the records of Beaver City : — . 
 
 March 8th 187 1 
 To whomsoever it may concern 
 
 This is to certify that in the beginning of 1869 when I gave a bill of divorce 
 to Sarah Ann Lowry I gave to her for the good of her four children the follow- 
 ing property viz A parcel of land of about riine acres enclosed all around with a 
 house of two rooms and one co* and heifer 
 
 William C Ritter 
 
 I could, if space permitted, give many others equally in- 
 teresting. 
 
 I cannot say that I was much grieved at the sight of my hus' 
 band's divorce. At the same time, long training in the school of 
 trouble had hardened my heart and rendered me almost indif- 
 ferent, and I cannot say tha!t I very greatly rejoiced. Nature 
 adapts us morally, as well as physically, to the positions Which 
 we have to occupy in life. The hand' of him who labors miich 
 becomes hard, and the unshodden foot grows horny, and the 
 heart which at first is tender and, like the seolian harp, ready 
 to answer to the slightest passing breath, by and by, beneatih 
 the rough hand of trial and the world, becomes callous and 
 stony, and the roughest storms and the sweetest pleasures 
 alike seem to make little impression upon it. 
 
 Thus it was with me when I received that paper. A fe# 
 years before, a reliable assurance that my husband vPould never 
 enter into Polygamy would have been to me the realisation of 
 my best earthly wishes. But now- my heart was almost dead, 
 and I felt as if I hardly cared one way or the other. If I felt' 
 thus, who had still all my. dariing children around me, who 
 had never missed one dear little face from the fireside or from 
 the table ; what must have been endured by those mothers 
 who not only gave away their husbands to other wives, but 
 who lost child after child, until, bereft of all they loved on 
 earthj they could but, like Rachael, sit down in ashes 1 and 
 mourn for the dead .' 
 
BRIGHAMS DEVICES. 55g 
 
 But the more I thoiught over what had happened, the more 
 doubtful I felt as to what the result would be. That there 
 would be some great change in our life, I felt assured ; but to 
 me the change was coming almost too late. Then, too, the 
 young wife who in her hasty anger had obtained the divorce. — 
 I felt that her happiness must surely be gone^ and I could not 
 bear the thought that my peace should be purchased with the 
 sorrows of another. Brother Brigham's part in the matter 
 was also ever present in my mind. That he had resolved to 
 bring ruin upon my hiasband I did not now for a moment 
 doubt. But if a weak woman's efforts could in any way assist 
 in thwairting his designs, I fully resolved that he never should 
 have the satisfaction of seeing those designs successful. I 
 would stand by my husband, I would work for, and assist, him, 
 and would give not even a passing thought to what I might 
 have suffered, or remember that he had ever loved others bet- 
 ter than myself. I would be to him now the true wife that 
 before God I had vowed to be, for worse as well as for better ; 
 and however I myself might have been wronged, I would, for 
 my part, endeavor faithfully to perform my whole duty to my 
 husband and to God. 
 
 After I had formed this mental resolution, and had begun 
 to realise our new position, I felt as if awakening from a loflg 
 dream of many years ; — I was released from the clutches of 
 that frightful nightmare — Polygamy ; and I could once more 
 take my place beside my husband as his wife. I knew that 
 he would have much to contend against, and would need all 
 the moral support that I could accord to him. Brigham's 
 efforts in respect to my husband's paper had been far too suc- 
 cessful, and although it was still carried on, fresh difficulties 
 sprang up every day. My husband had been deceived by Brig- 
 ham's oily manner and plausible way ; but to others his inten^ 
 tion in sending him away was no secret. A man, name^i Bull, 
 who is now and was also at that time, employed in the Deseret 
 News office, said that no one but Mr. Stenhouse had ever been 
 deceived by what the Prophet had done — it was commonly re- 
 ported that Brigham intended to ruin my husbai)^, and that 
 34. 
 
560 KNAVE OR FOOL? 
 
 when he prophesied that the paper in Ogden should be a great 
 success, he was himself perfectly aware that it was utterly im-r 
 possible that such should be the case. 
 
 Whether Brigham was the deceiver or the deceived, I do 
 not wish to say. Men who consider themselves inspired, and 
 go on day by day uttering all sorts of nonsense and blasphemy, 
 and giving impertinent and mischievous advice in the " name 
 of the Lord," at last become thoroughly impervious to reason, 
 and daily and hourly deceive themselves. I hope, for his own 
 sake, it was so with Brigham, for I would rather believe him a 
 self-made fool than a downright knave ; and in many of his 
 transactions — perhaps I ought almost to say «// — it is clear to 
 every one that he is either one or the other. Of one thing I 
 am certain, — I was fully contented that we should lose all, if 
 only my husband were taken, once and for ever, clean out of 
 the meshes of Mormonism. We might have to make a ter- 
 rible sacrifice, but to nie it was a sacrifice well worth the 
 making. 
 
CHAPTER XL. 
 
 MARY BURTON— LIFE'S JOURNEY ENDED : REST AT LAST. 
 
 Sent for in Haste — " Sister Mary had taken Poison" — Mary's Troubles— ^Elder 
 Slfrewsbury's Wives — Removing to Salt Lake City — Domestic Life without 
 
 , Love — A Wife's Despair — A Divided Household — Seeking Sympathy-^The 
 forsaken Wife — ^The change which Polygamy produced in a Husband^— Com- 
 forting a heartbroken Wife— Dark thoughts-^ Waiting for the End — Mary at- 
 tempts to destroy Herself — A Painful Story-^Heartless conduct of Elder 
 Shrewsbury — A Wife's Curse — Shadows of the Night — Broken-Hearted — The 
 little Medicine Chest — ^A fatal Potion — Elder Shrewsbury visits his dying 
 Wife—" What a Ctirse was there ! " — With my dying Friend — Life's Journey 
 Ended— Rest at last 
 
 IT was about this time that one morning, very early, before 
 I was Ayell up, a young girl came to the house in a great 
 hurry, asking to speak to me without a moment's delay. 
 
 I threw a wrapper round me, and went out at once to see 
 her. She said she came from the house of Sister Mary Bur- 
 ton, and begged me to come directly and see her, for Mary- 
 had taken poison and it was thought she was dying. 
 
 Now, I have been so much engaged of late in telling my 
 own sorrows, that Mary Burton has quite dropped out of my 
 story. But it must not be supposed that all that time I saw 
 nothing of my poor friend. On the contrary, I had seen her 
 much more freqiiently of late than I used to when I first came 
 to Salt Lake City. When I last spoke of her it was when she 
 was about tb return to Southern Utah, where she and her hus- 
 band then resided. It was evident to me from her conversa- 
 
S62 MARY BURTON. 
 
 tion, as it must have been to the reader, that her faith in 
 Morraonism had even then entirely gone, that she felt her 
 husband's neglect and unkindness most keenly, and that she 
 had become a miserable, broken-hearted woman. It was verj 
 painful to contrast what she now was with what she had been 
 when I first knew her, and then to think what a happy wife 
 and mother she might have been if the spectre of Mormonism 
 had not crossed her path. 
 
 Mary and her husband. Elder Shrewsbury, left the Settle- 
 ments about a year after the time I last mentioned her, and 
 took up their abode in Salt Lake City. Elder Shrewsbury 
 had prospered exceedingly, and when he came to Salt Lake he 
 brought with him, besides Mary, his second wife, Ellen, who, 
 as we before noticed, had become very much attached to her. 
 The other three wives and their children were left at the farm 
 in Southern Utah. He would probably have brought them all 
 with him, had there been in the City a house large enough to 
 hold them all. As it was, he purchased a good lot about half 
 a mile from where we resided, with a comfortable house upon 
 it ; and there his first and second wives lived together. This 
 was the man who had solemnly sworn before God, that he 
 would never practice Polygamy ! But I doubt if Elder Shrews- 
 bury, with his comfortable house in the City, his farm and 
 lands in the South, his fast increasing property, and his many 
 wives, felt truly the hundredth part of the happiness which he 
 would have experienced in the devotion of one faithful heart, 
 even had it been in the midst of poverty and care. He, how- 
 ever, poor infatuated man, did not think thus ; he was. actually 
 even now courting a young girl of about seventeen years of 
 age, who the two wives daily expected would be brought home 
 to jaid in building up their husband's " Kingdom." I do not 
 think Mary cared much about this. It was the taking of the 
 first plural wife that was her great sorrow. After that, her 
 love for her husband weakened, until it altogether died out, and 
 she did not care how many wives he took. 
 
 Mary's high' spirit was always urging her into rebellion; In 
 married life both husband and wife give way to each other in 
 
THE STORY OF A WASTED LIFE. 563 
 
 a thousand little things, of no consequence in themselveSj trat 
 quite sufficient, without the presence of love, to sow the seeds 
 of discord. But when love has fled, and the husband looks 
 upon his wife — the companion of his youth, the mother of his 
 children — not as the partner of his whole life and the sharer 
 of all his joys and sorrows, but as a person whose presence is 
 a reproach to him and who is an inconvenience rather than 
 otherwise ; — and when the wife regards her husband as one 
 whom formerly she loved with true devotion, but who has 
 cruelly broken her laeart and trampled upon her feelings, and 
 who is nothing to her now but a tyrant whose very presence 
 is painful to her, — can there tJien be any forbearance, any of 
 those gentle kindnesses, any of those loving forgivenesses, 
 any of those mutual tendernesses and sweet confidences which 
 constitute the charm of married life, and make it what the 
 Apostle said it was — a type of the sacred union between 
 Christ and His people in heaven. 
 
 In giving up Mormonism, my unhappy friend gave up, as 
 too many have done, faith in aill else. She had lived, as she 
 thought, a life of religion ; and when she found what a terrible 
 mockery of all that is holy that so-called religion was, she cast 
 it aside, thinking that all religion was vain. She did not see 
 that she would have acted just as wisely in rejecting all food 
 because she chanced to partake of some that was poisoned ; 
 she did not see that, although the broken reed on which she 
 rested was unable to yield her any true support, nevertheless 
 the everlasting foundations of Eternal Truth which God Him- 
 self has laid can 7iever be removed ; and that though creeds 
 and systems may fail and pass away, only to give place 
 to others equally unsatisfactory, yet those divine verities 
 are established for ever, are beyond the reach of earthly vicis- 
 situdes, and know nothing of time or change. 
 
 Utterly miserable and sick at heart, Mary cared not 
 whether she lived or died. There was nothing to bind her to 
 life, and beyond the life of this world she was altogether with- 
 out hope. A more wretched existence it is scarcely possible 
 to imagine. 
 
564 DESOLATE AND ALONE. 
 
 While they were still in the Settlements, she treated the 
 other wives with the greatest contempt, sitting by them at the 
 table or passing them in the house without vouchsafing a lool? 
 or a word. Her husband, as might be expected, avoided her 
 whenever it was possible, and the other wives returned her 
 coldness and disdain, and in turn annoyed her as much as they 
 could when they were not too busy looking after one another. 
 It would be impossible to picture a house more divided against 
 itself than was that of Elder Shrewsbury. 
 
 When the two wives, Ellen and Mary, lived together with 
 their husband in Salt Lake City, Mary, of course, had no op- 
 portunity of showing her hatred and contempt for the Poly- 
 gamic wives. But towards her husband she evinced a cold dis- 
 dain, as if he were now nothing at all to her — as if her very 
 heart itself had been withered. For Ellen, who since Elder 
 Shrewsbury had taken his other wives had clung to her 
 with a child-like affection, and to her own little girl alone, shq 
 showed that deep and constant love which she had once 
 lavished upon such an unworthy object. 
 
 She used to come to me and tell me all her griefs ; and in 
 a passion of rage and tears she would hurl defiance at Mor- 
 monism and curse bitterly the system that had wrecked her 
 life. Then I would soothe her, and speak calmly to her, and 
 try to place matters in their best light ; and she would sit and 
 listen in a painful state of apathy as if she cared for none of 
 these things. Presently she would rise and go, and then, per- 
 haps, I would not see her for weeks together, unless I chanced 
 to call upon her at her own house. Sometimes, for days and 
 even weeks at a time, she would shut herself up in her room 
 and refuse to see her husband or any one else, except her 
 little girl, who slept in the same room with her, and who at 
 such times used to bring in what food they wanted ; for in 
 these melancholy fits she would not even let the servants 
 come near her. 
 
 There was a little table near the window, and from the case- 
 ment of the window could be seen in the far distance the 
 lofty ranges of the Wahsatch Mountains. And sitting at that 
 
A CHANGED MAI*, 565 
 
 table, gating from that window, with her" cheek resting upon 
 her hand, Mary would watch the whole day long as if en- 
 tranced in some ecstatic vision. Her Kttle girl — a child of 
 winning ways, bashful to an extreme and very pretty, but, 
 though so young, with a look of wistful sadness upon her 
 childish face — had become accustomed to her mother's ways ; 
 and when one of these long spells of melancholy came upon 
 her, she would either steal out quietly and wander away for a 
 long walk all by herself — for she never played with the other 
 children in her father's house — or else, as was more frequently 
 the case, she would sit down on the ground near her 
 mother and silently amuse herself with a book or some 
 childish toy. 
 
 To my mind there was something inexpressibly painful in 
 all this. When Mary did not come to see rrie, I would call 
 round at her husband's house, and try to draw her out from her 
 melancholy seclusion. It was very seldom that I saw Elder 
 Shrewsbury, and I cannot say that I wished to do so. He 
 had, as his wife told me, undergone a complete change since I 
 knew him in England. — The open look, the upright bearing, 
 the earnestness of speech, which then characterised him', 
 were now gone for ever. He was still a handsome man, 
 rather portly, and evidently well to do in the world ; but 
 there were lines about his- eyes which ought not to have 
 been seen in the face of a man of his years ; and his lips, 
 without uttering a word, told theii- own story. I could re- 
 member watching those lips — rather full and voluptuous even 
 then — in the old days when Polygamy was unknown and 
 Morrtionism came upon us in all its freshness and stirred our 
 very souls to their utmost depths. — Then they seemed instinct 
 with the thought and intellect of the man, and their very ex- 
 pression conveyed a meaning almost as eloquent as the words 
 which proceeded from them. Now they were listless and 
 heavy ; and if any expression hovered around them stilly it 
 was an expression of sensuality and selfishness. Was it, I 
 sometimes asked myself. Polygamy that ruined that man ; or 
 was there in his nature — hidden of course in early days — ^that 
 
566 WEARY OF LIFE. 
 
 which led him to Polygamy,' and which, had there been no 
 Mormonism, would have developed itself in some other 
 degrading way? 
 
 Heartbroken and wretched, weary of life, and yet with no 
 hopeful assurance of life beyond the grave, poor Mary lived on 
 year after year, while those who seemed to dance in the very 
 sunshine of existence were cut off Uke the summer flowers in 
 the harvest-field. Lately, however, I thought I saw symptoms 
 of a change. The pitcher may be taken often to the fountain, 
 but it will be broken at last, and this poor, weak body of 
 ours, wonderful as its powers of endurance are, cannot last 
 for ever. With a mind at ease and happy, we can bid defiance 
 to many of the ills which flesh is heir to, but when the 
 mind is troubled, and the heart is weary, and the flesh also 
 is weak, the thread of life is ready at any moment to be 
 snapped asunder. 
 
 I saw this clearly in the case of my poor friend. Every 
 time she came to see me, or I called at her house, I noticed 
 that she was perceptibly growing thinner and thinner ; her 
 eye seehied brighter, and there was always a flush upon her 
 Cheek, which would have been beautiful had it not been for the 
 seal of melancholy which was stamped upon every feature. 
 But the brightness of the eye, and the flush upon the cheek, 
 were not symbols of health, but the imprint of the finger 
 of death. 
 
 She did not know this. Though she longed to die, she 
 little thought that death was so near her. Sometimes she 
 would talk almost happily of the old by-goae days ; then she 
 would sit brooding over her griefs ; and then again she 
 would talk anxiously about the future of her little daughter. 
 I had seen other wives as wretched as poor Mary was, — aye, 
 more so, for they had abject, grinding poverty superadded 
 to all their woes ; — but, more than for any other I felt for 
 my poor friend, and exerted myself to the uttermost to com- 
 fort her. In this I had been to a certain extent successful. 
 She would appear for a tipie a little more cheerful, but it was 
 not long before she relapsed into her habitual melancholy way. 
 
PAINFUL QUESTIONS, 567 
 
 That which troubled me most of late, in my intercourse 
 with Mary, was the fact that she was always talking about 
 death. This certainly was no matter of surprise to me, but 
 it was very painful. Over and over again she would dis- 
 cuss the question — whether under any circumstances suicide 
 could be justified, and whether if any one, in absolute de- 
 spair were to take away their own life, God would ever pardon 
 them. 
 
 I would never enter into such subjects as these, for I con- 
 sidered that such conversation showed a morbid condition of 
 mind, could not possibly be of any good to either of us, and 
 would only suggest harmful thoughts. But again and again 
 Mary reverted to the subject, and I really at last began to 
 grow quite anxious about her. 
 
 It was not, therefore, with surprise that I received the 
 summons that morning. I did not wait to ask any questions 
 about the poisoning, but hastened to the bedside of my 
 unfortunate friend, trusting that I might yet be in time to 
 render some assistance. 
 
 I found her lying on the bed, partly dressed, and, as it 
 seemed to me at first, asleep. There was, at the bedside, and 
 bending over her, the second wife, who was in as much 
 trouble as if the sufferer had been her own sister. The poor 
 girl had been weeping, and was evidently very much dis- 
 tressed. There was also present in the room another sister, 
 whom I recognised as a friend of Mary's. The little daughter 
 of the unfortunate woman was there as well. One person, 
 whom every one -^ould naturally have expected to see at the 
 bedside of a dying wife under such circumstances, was con- 
 spicuous by his absence, — I mean, of course. Elder Shrews- 
 bury himself. 
 
 I sat down on the bed, beside poor Mary, and took her 
 hand in mine. It was cold but damp, and her breathing was 
 somewhat heavy. She was still unconscious. I asked the 
 pretty pale-faced girl — the second wife — who was bending 
 over her, how it had all happened, and whether they had had 
 a doctor. 
 
568 A CRUEL PROPOSItlON. 
 
 " Oh, yes," she said, sobbing all the time, " we sent for tlie 
 doctor, and he has only just gone. He said he had done all 
 he could, and that we could let her sleep on now." 
 
 She then told me what had taken place. It appeared that 
 the night before. Elder Shrewsbury had gone up into Mary's 
 room to speak to her about a matter of some importance. 
 Although living in the same house she had not seen him for 
 several weeks, and the mere fact of being in his presence 
 agitated her. He told her he had conie to talk about her child 
 •^little Mary, called Mary after her mother. For some reason 
 or other, which nobody then seemed to understand. Elder 
 Shrewsbury had taken a fancy that the child should be sepa- 
 rated from her mother ;. he wanted to send her to stay witli 
 his other family in the Settlements, and it was for this pur- 
 pose he came to see Mary that night. It certainly did seem 
 the refinement of cruelty to separate the child from her poor 
 mother, who would thus have become, as one might say, 
 doubly widowed ; and I am strongly inclined to question 
 whether Elder Shrewsbury's motives were of the purest kind.. 
 It isi however, only just to state, that subsequently, when 
 speaking to a friend about the matter, he said that he had 
 long noticed in his wife, what he considered were incipient 
 symptoms of madness, and he thought that his duty towards- 
 the child imperatively demanded that he should immediately 
 take her away from her mother. He added^as was indeed 
 true — that his other wives in the South would have taken the 
 greatest care of her. 
 
 Mary was furious when the proposal was made to her. 
 She bitterly upbraided her husband for all his cruelty and 
 neglect, she cursed him for his perfidy, and she vowed that 
 nothing but death should separate her from her little girl. 
 
 Elder Shrewsbury trembled at the anger of his poor for- 
 saken wife, and he crept out of her room and downstairs. 
 But Mary could not be appeased. She went to the room of 
 ' the second wife — the only creature in the house, besides her 
 little girl with whom she sometimes condescended to hold 
 intercourse — and there she acted in a very wild.and extrav- 
 
TROUBLED AT HEART. 57I 
 
 agant way. It was with great difficulty that she was at last 
 persuaded to lie down and take a little rest. She would 
 not go to her own room; so Ellen — the second wife — ^per- 
 suaded her to remaia with her all the night. She lay down, 
 but did not sleep. She muttered strange things, and by and 
 by sat up in the bed and spoke as if people were present 
 whom she had known years and years ago. Ellen was 
 frightened ; but out of love to Mary, and not wishing that 
 others should see her in that crazy condition, she did not call 
 for help, thinking tjj^t presently she would fall asleep and in 
 the morning all would be right. But the long night passed 
 away, and just before day-break Ellen fell into a sort of 
 fitful slumber. It would seem that just then poor Mary dis- 
 covered for the iirst time that she was not sleeping in her 
 own room, and that her little daughter was not with her. 
 Distracted as her mind was, she probably thought that they 
 had stolen the child away, and went in search of her. 
 
 She found her way to her own room, and then what hap- 
 pened no one, of course, could teL She must have seen that 
 her child was safe ; and it is not unlikely that, reassured on 
 that point, she felt that she needed rest, and thought that it 
 would be best to take some sedative to produce the sleep 
 which she believed would restore her to herself again. She 
 had in her room a little leather medicine-chest — a very useful 
 article for any one travelling, or to keep in the house — and to 
 that she must have had resort. Certain it is, that when, an 
 hour later, Ellen awoke and went to see what had become of 
 her husband's first wife, she found the little medicine-chest 
 open upon the bureau, Mary lying upon the bed, apparently 
 asleep, and a faint sickly smell, which one better versed in 
 such things would have known was the smell of opium, per- 
 vading the whole room. 
 
 Ellen began to scream and call for help, and one of the 
 women about the house, who was up at that early hour, came 
 to see what was the matter. She, upon hearing what Ellen 
 said, rushed downstairs shrieking for assistance. Fortunately , 
 for every one,' Elder Shrewsbury, ■ who had just risen, was 
 
572 "OH god! WHAT A CURSE WAS THERE ! " 
 
 Standing in the hall-way below. He took hold of the noisy 
 woman and asked her what was the matter, and after hearing 
 all she had to say he sent her to attend to her domestic duties, 
 with a strict injunction to say nothing to a living soul about 
 what she had seen or heard. 
 
 Elder Shrewsbury then went up to Mar/s room, and there 
 he learned that all that the silly woman had just said to him 
 was quite true. He, however, betrayed no emotion. Very 
 calmly he put the stopper back into the laudanum bottle, then 
 looked at his watch and hesitated, all the while that pale- 
 faced Ellen was looking anxiously at him, wanting to know 
 what she could do. After a few moments of indecision, Elder 
 Shrewsbury turned to Ellen and said, "Yes; go for the 
 doctor." 
 
 Ellen flew upon her mission. 
 
 Meanwhile, Elder Shrewsbury looked towards the bed 
 where poor Mary lay — Mary, for whose love he had perjured 
 his soul — Mary who never would have been his had he not 
 given that sacred promise, the breaking of which made him 
 an outlaw from heaven and a thing to be despised of men. 
 He looked for one single moment at his poor wife as she lay 
 there, and then he turned upon his heel and went out of the 
 room. For the wealth of all the world I would not feel as 
 that man felt, if the thoughts which then crowded upon his 
 brain were what, for the sake of our common humanity, I 
 trust they were. The remembrance of the life which his folly 
 or fanaticism — it matters little which — had blasted ; the 
 thought of that solemn vow which he had taken to love her 
 only and for ever ; the sight of that dear one to whom he 
 had once plighted his troth, nciw desolate, forsaken, almost 
 inaniac in her wretchedness. — Oh God ! what a curse was 
 there for any man's soul to bear ! 
 
 The physician, when he came, administered an emetic and 
 made them walk the patient about the room. Ellen and 
 the friend of Mary who was present volunteered for this 
 service. They supported her, one on each side, and paced 
 her round and round the room, thus compelling her to exer- 
 
NEARING THE HAVEN. 573 
 
 tion ; and from time to time they made her swallow doses of 
 strong coffee, in which a little brandy had been mixed. When, 
 at length, signs of returning consciousness were apparent, the 
 physician left, promising to call again in the course of the 
 morning. 
 
 It was then that some one present thought of sending for 
 me, and I arrived not long after the physician had gone. I 
 was the only person, outside the family, beside the friend 
 whom I have mentioned, who knew of any thing that had 
 taken place — so easeful were they that the matter should not 
 get abroad ; and I should certainly not have been summoned 
 had it not been for the close intimacy which existed between 
 Mary and myself, which made us more like sisters than 
 friends. The reader must not, however, suppose that in relat- 
 ing this I am even now betraying a trust ; for my friends in 
 Utah know as well as I do that so many unhappy wives have 
 in their desperation been driven to attempt self-destruction, 
 that having no clue in the name, which solely out of love for 
 my poor friend, I have all through this narrative given her, 
 they will not know who to fix upon as the person to whom I 
 allude.* There is, however, one still living — he will know — let 
 his own conscience be his accuser. 
 
 In about half an hour's time, Mary began to recognise those 
 who were around her, but she did not seem disposed to speak. 
 She opened her eyes and looked dreamily at me for a long 
 time, but the slight pressure of my hand was her only recog- 
 nition of my presence. I bent down over her and whispered 
 a few assuring words in her ear, and for a moment a faint, 
 weary smile lighted up her thin, pale face. It was not like 
 the sweet smiles of the by-gone days which used to suffuse her 
 whole countenance with sunshine — it was but the very ghost of 
 a smile. Presently she sank into a gentle slumber; but I 
 still sat by her on the bed, holding her hand in mine, and I 
 
 • Besides poor Mary's family, in every other instance [with the solitary excep- 
 tion of Sister Ann— my " talkative friend "—who is still living and is so well 
 known in Salt Lake City,] I have been as scrupulous in giving rra/ names as I' 
 have been in stating only facts which I had either witnessed or knew beyond, 
 question were true. 
 
574 life's journey over, 
 
 remained there for two or three hours. Then, after seeing 
 that every thing was at hand which she could possibly want 
 if she awoke, and assured by Ellen that she would not leave 
 her until she was able to sit up, I left for my own home. 
 
 At the bottom of the stairs, in the hall-way, I was con- 
 fronted by Elder Shrewsbury himself. This" surprised me, as 
 hitherto he had most sedulously avoided coming in contact 
 with me. He gave me one searching glance, as if to read my 
 thoughts, and then said : " Sister Stenhouse, this is a most 
 unhappy affair, but say nothing about it — no good can come 
 of talking of such matters." 
 
 I assured him that for Mary's sake— not for his — I would 
 not speak of what had transpired ; but when he held out his 
 hand for me to shake I affected not to see it, but wished him 
 good-morning, and left the house. 
 
 For some time she said nothing to me about the sad event 
 which had so greatly troubled us, and when at length shfe 
 hesitatingly dluded to it, I was much relieved to find that the 
 taking of the deadly drug was on her part wholly accidental. 
 It was as I from the first suspected — for I knew and loved my 
 dear friend too well to wrong her even by a thought Cruelly 
 as she had suffered, wretched and miserable as she was, bit- 
 terly as she felt, the instincts of her heart were too true and 
 her nature too noble to allow of her seeking oblivion from her 
 troubles in voluntary and premeditated death, as I have known 
 was the case with many wretched Mormon wives. She had' 
 only thought to take an opiate to soothe the feverish excite- 
 ment which had almost bereft her of reason, and, in the weak 
 and enfeebled condition in which she was, the draught had 
 been too powerful for her. Guiltless as she was, she dreaded 
 that others might impute wrong motives to her in what she 
 had done ; and even to me she spoke of her sickness pain- 
 fully and with hesitation. 
 
 After this, I called day after day^ upon my poor friend, 
 until she was sufficiently recovered to walk about and even to 
 get out of doors a little. The story of the unhappy attempt 
 
REST AT LAST. 575 
 
 which she was supposed to have made upon her life, by some 
 means, however, got rumored abroad, and she heard of it She 
 said nothing at the time, but I believe it preyed upon her mind. 
 Weak and failing in health, as she long had been, the shock which 
 her system had received was too much for her, and it was evident 
 to every one who saw her that her earthly trials would soon 
 be ended. She sank gradually, and life ebbed from her gently 
 and without pain. A few days before she died, she sent for 
 me, and I spent several hours with her. I might say that 
 they were happy hours ; for the near prospect of death 
 seemed to have dispelled ill those gloomy fears of the future 
 life, which had for so many years troubled her soul ; and she 
 now looked forward with peaceful resignation to her approach- 
 ingchange. Death came at last to her when she was sleeping, 
 and she passed away tranquilly and without a sigh. I almost 
 rejoiced when I heard that at last her weary journey was 
 over and she was at rest. She had been ever very dear to 
 me, and I loved her with the fondest affection. But I shall 
 never think of her without bitter feelings towards that unholy 
 system which brought her to an untimely grave ; for she of 
 all others was one of the fairest flowers which were ever 
 blighted by Mormonism and Polygamy. 
 
CHAPTER XLI. 
 
 MY HUSBAND DISFELLOWSHIPPED— WE APO'STATISE— 
 BRUTAL OUTRAGE UPON MY HUSBAND AND MYSELF. 
 
 A Crisis — Effects o£ Superstition and Blind Obedience — Questioning Brother 
 Bfigham's Authority — The Faithful are " Counselled " Against My Husband 
 — The School of the Prophets — Arbitrary Measures — My Husband is Dis- 
 fellowshipped— "I Will Be Free ! "—The Breaking of Bonds— The Day of 
 Liberty — Asking to be "Cut Off" from the Church — A Brutal Outrage 
 Upon My Husband and Myself— The Secret Police— Who Were the Guilty ?— 
 How the Bodies of Murdered Men are " Discovered ! " — The Fate of Apos- 
 tates — Carrying Out the Teachings of Brigham — Who Ought to be Blamed — 
 What an lU-Treated Wife .Told Me— Brjgham's Explanation— He Accuses 
 Belinda's Brothers — How Crimes Are Explained. Away — Why Brigham 
 Withdrew an Offered Reward— What People Dared Not Say. 
 
 NOTWITHSTANDING all my own personal troubles 
 and the difficulties which surrounded us, the loss of my 
 dear friend affected me very deeply. And yet her story is 
 the same as might be told of hundreds of other English girls 
 who have been lured from their happy homes and have died 
 broken-hearted and neglected in Utah. 
 
 Now came that change in our life which I had so long 
 hoped for, but which had always seemed to me so very far 
 distant. We had been tossed by many a storm, but the 
 violence of this last gale was such that it forced us clean out 
 of the sea of Mormonism, and landed us high and dry upon 
 the firm ground of apostacy. 
 
 My husband had been so long engaged in the defence of 
 
REBELLION AND APOSTACY. 577 
 
 Mormonisra that it had beconje alinost a part of himself ; — its 
 doctrines and observances seemed to him beyond a question, 
 its weak and doubtful points were ignored, and implicit 
 obedience to the behests of the Priesthood was with him an 
 article of faith. When therefore I heard him, with others, 
 talking over some of the questionable teachings of the Church, 
 criticising Brigham's counsellings, doubting some of his 
 measures, and speaking of him as they would of any of the 
 other brethren, I was satisfied tliat his days of faith were 
 numbered. The point that I had all along been aiming at 
 was to get him to think for himself, for hitherto he had been 
 a mere tool in the hands of the Priesthood. Long years of 
 submission and receiving as divine inspiration 'all that a 
 " Prophet " is pleased to say, necessarily benumbs the soul 
 ?ind withers its life, until unconsciously the victim becomes 
 an abject slave. And this is the position to-day of many 
 otherwise well-informed and intelligent people in the Mormon 
 Church^they are mere automata. 
 
 •About the time when my husband' returned with his paper 
 to Salt Lake City, the Uiak Magazine, a liberal journal 
 just struggling into existence, began to call in question some 
 of Brigham's measures, and the editors, who were all men of 
 some mark in the Mormon Church, presumed to hint that the 
 people had rights and privileges as well as the Priesthood. 
 This was done in a very quiet, unobtrusive way, but it was, 
 nevertheless, pronounced rebellion and apostacy. My hus- 
 band's paper was silent upon the subject ; and, in consequence, 
 he was suspected of being in league with the enemy. This 
 was another good reason why the people should be " coun- 
 selled " • not to take in the Telegraph. Although he was not 
 yet sufficiently advanced. in thought to give much direct aid 
 to the questioners of Brigham's authority, I saw with pleasure 
 that he did not wish to oppose them ; the tone of his paper 
 was evidently changing, and the articles which appeared frpm 
 time to time gave serious offence to Brigham Young. This, 
 however, was not all his wrong-doing; — he had of laite been 
 neglectful in his attendance at the " School of the Prophets " 
 35 
 
5/8 DISFELLOWSHIPPED. 
 
 —a meeting which was then held every Saturday for th^ 
 benefit of the Elders, but which has now for a time been 
 discontinued, on account of some of the bretliren turning 
 traitor and revealing all that was said. 
 
 Together with the editors of the Utah Magazine, Mr. 
 Stenhouse and one or two others were summoned to appear at 
 the School on the following Saturday, to give their reasons for 
 previous non-attendance. This they had all along anticipated, 
 and were therefore not surprised at the summons, but they 
 hardly expected that Brigham would act so precipitately ; for, 
 without waiting to hear their reasons, he disfellowshipped them 
 all for irregular attendance. 
 
 Brigham's assumption of the right to disfellowship men 
 from the Church because of irregular attendance at the School 
 was a stretch of authority which startled my husband: "What 
 will he not do next?" he said. "To submit. would be to ac- 
 knowledge him absolute, and me a slave. There is but one 
 alternative now — slavery or freedom. Cost me what it may, 
 I w/// be free!" 
 
 Those who have never been enslaved by a superstitious faith 
 which mentally and bodily enthrals its devotees, as Mormon' 
 ism does, can form no idea of the joy, the happiness, whichis 
 experienced when, after years of spiritual servitude, the 
 shackles are burst asunder arid the slave is" free ! " There is 
 pleasure even in the thought itself that one is free — free to 
 think and free to act, free to worship according to the dictates 
 of one's own conscience, and free to speak one's own opinions 
 and sentiments, without the consta;nt fear that some spy is 
 listening to every word and that the consequences may be far 
 from pleasant ! ' 
 
 In August of the same year, my husband sent a respectful 
 and kindly letter to the Bishop of our Ward, stating that' he 
 ' had no faith in Brigham's claim to an " Infallible Priesthood," 
 and that he considered that he ought to be cut off from the 
 Church. I added a postscript, stating that I wished to share 
 my husband's fate — little thinking that within three days rny 
 request would be answered in a too literal manner. 
 
A NIGHT ATTACK. ' 5791 
 
 A little after ten o'clock, on the Saturday night succeeding 
 our withdrawal from the Church, we were returning home 
 together. The night was very dark, and as our residence is 
 in the suburbs of the City, north of the Temple block, and 
 the road very quiet, the walk was a very lonely one and per- 
 haps not altogether too safe. We had gone about a third of 
 the way, when we suddenly saw four men come out from under 
 some trees at a little distance from us. In the gloom of the 
 night we could only see them very indistinctly, and could hot 
 distinguish who thej^ were. They separated ; and two of them 
 came forward and stumbled up against us, and two passed on 
 beside us. For a moment I thought, that they- were intoxicated, 
 but it was soon clear that they were acting from design. As 
 soon as they approached, they seized hold of my husband's 
 arms, one on each side, and held him firmly, thus rendering him 
 almost pov/erless. They were all masked, for it was supfjosed 
 that thus we should not be able to discover their identity, and 
 that if by any chance an investigation should subsequently be 
 made into the doings of that night it would not be possible for 
 any one to witness against them. 
 
 I am inclined to think that these wretches, when they 
 planned the attack, had not calculated upon my being present 
 with my husband, and I imagine that when they saw me with 
 him they supposed I should scream and run away, after the 
 manner of many women. In this, however, they were mis- 
 taken. I still clung to my husband's arm, but with my left 
 hand caught hold of one of the ruffians by the collar of his 
 coat ; for I apprehended the worst, well knowing of what 
 atrocities these men were capable. It is no secret that the 
 police of Salt Lake City — for it is the police who there com- 
 mit murders and other inhuman outrages — treat with the 
 greate'st brutality all the unhappy Gentiles and Apostates 
 Whose misfortune it is to fall into their power. This also is 
 the wretched effects of the fanatical teaching of the Church. 
 These men believe that Utah is Zion — the "Kingdom of 
 God," and that citizens of the United States are but intruders 
 upon this holy ground; that tliey ought to be driven out and 
 
J8a "BRETHREN, DO YOUR feUTY ! * 
 
 despoiled of everything, and even muMered if opportunity 
 offers. They make no secret of thtese feelings towards the 
 Gentiles, and towards Apostate Mormons it is shown, if possi- 
 ble, in a somewhat stronger manner. 
 
 The movements of the two men who held my husband were 
 Somewhat impeded by my clinging to his arm, and they seemed 
 to hesitate for a moment. The other two, who stood a few 
 feet distant from us, also hesitated. One of the men who 
 held my huisband'said to them, "Brethren, do your duty." We 
 recognised his voice at once as that of a certain policeman — 
 a young man whom we had known in England when a child, 
 and. with whose family we had been upon the most friendly 
 terms. 
 
 In an instant I saw them raise their arms, as if t^dkifig aim, 
 Bind for one brief second I thoiaght that our end had now surely 
 come) and that we, like so many obnoxious persons before us. 
 Were about to be murdered for the great sin of apostacyj 
 This, I firmly believe, would have been my husband's fate, if I 
 had not chanced to be with him or had I run away; — they 
 would probably have beaten him to death ; — they, who I have 
 every reason to believe were two of the regular and two of the 
 special policemen; — and then, the next morning, they would 
 have "discovered" the body, and it would have been said that 
 he had been murdered by Gentiles or Apostates in a persond 
 quarrel or a street brawl. My presence somewhat disaf- 
 ranged their plans, and it was that probably which caused the 
 two men to hesitate, not knowing what would be considered 
 their "duty" unddr present circumstances. 
 
 A much less noble fate than assassination was reserved for us. 
 The wretches, although otherwise well armed, were not hold* 
 ing revolvers in their hands as I at first supposed. They were 
 furnished with huge garden-syringes charged with the most 
 disgusting filth, in the preparation of which they took especial 
 pains. So kindred to their own base natures was such an act 
 that I doubt not they found it quite a labor of lov«. The 
 moment the syringes were pointed at us, my husband, think- 
 ling a shot was coming, moved his head, and thus to a certain 
 
The pate of apostates. S^i 
 
 CJrtent escaped the full force of the discharge. I, however, wa^ 
 not so fortunate. My h^r, honadt, face, clothes, person — 
 every inch of my body, eveiy shred that I wore — ^were in an 
 instant saturated, and my husband and myself stood there 
 redcing fi-om head to foot. 
 
 The villains, when they had perpetrated this disgusting and 
 brutal outrage, turned and fled. We ran after them for some 
 little distance, but we had no arms and nothing with which 
 to defend ourselves ; in fact we pursued them instinctively 
 rather than wkh apy idea of overtaking them. There was 
 Another man standing a little distance off in the direction in 
 which they were running, and we could not tell how many 
 inight be concealed: — the place, too, was dark and lonely, for 
 Ifeey had gone behind the Temple block — a fit comer for mur- 
 derers to skulk in ; a convenient spot for the commission of 
 any unholy deed. I was burning with indignation, and longed 
 to revenge myself upon the brutal cowards who had assaulted 
 us. In my anger I called upon them to come and kill us out- 
 right, for I would have preferred death to such an indignity; 
 I almost wonder that they did not take me at my word and 
 return and finish tfieir foul work, for they have long acted 
 upon the principle that "dead men tell no tales." 
 
 There were, at that time, in Uta:h, a great many special or 
 secret police who were always ready for any dirty, brutal, ot 
 murderous work. Just near bur home in Salt Lake City, there 
 is one miserable old fellow who has not yet been called to 
 account for his numerous crimes and villainies. In his younger 
 ^ilays he was one of these secret police, and, to judge from his 
 language, his only regret now is that he is no longer fit f of 
 active service. He has often told a neighbor of mine, who he 
 believes is a good Mormon, that nothing would give him more 
 pleasure than to serve my husband and myself as he thinks 
 we deserve — simply because we have dared to oppose Mor- 
 monism. The wife of one of the men whom we had suspected, 
 not long after came to see me and told me that she did not 
 doubt that her husband had been engaged in the affair, for she 
 had accused him of it and he had not denied it. It seems 
 
S82 WHERE THE BLAME KEALhY LIES. 
 
 perhaps strange that any wife should act thus/but this poor 
 woman had a great regard tor me, but none at all for her hus- 
 band who treated her most brutally. j 
 
 I shall never forget that night. I declared that henceforth 
 t would tear from my heart every association — every mem- 
 ory — every affection, which still remained to bind me to Mor- 
 monism — not one solitary link should be left. Henceforth I 
 would be the declared and opein enemy of the Priesthood. To 
 the utmost of my power — weak though I might be^— I would 
 arouse the women of Utah to a sense of the wrongs which 
 they endured; I would proclaim to the world the disgrace 
 which Mormonism is to the great American nation, the foul 
 blot that it is upon Christianity and the civilisation of the age! 
 
 I do not blame the mass of the Mormon people that such 
 outrages as this can be perpetrated in their midst, — I blam^ 
 the Priesthood, and I blame the leaders and their teachings. 
 I know the honest hearts of the Mormon community at large, 
 and that as a body they revolted at the atrocious wrong that 
 had been done to us. Although no one who valued their 
 standing in the Church dared openly express what they felt, 
 hundreds did so in private ; while the whole Gentile commu- 
 nity was aroused and indignant, and letters came from all parts 
 of the country, and'^ visitors daily called upon me to express 
 their sympathy. , I 
 
 My son-in-law, Joseph A. Young, on the night of the attack 
 offered a reward to the chief of the police, for the apprehen;- 
 sion of the ruffians ; but we knew well enough they would 
 never be discovered. A few Gentile friends also offered a 
 reward of five hundred dollars for any evidence that might 
 lead to their identification, but nothing, of course, was elicited. 
 The Mormon paper, in order to divert attention from the guilty 
 parties, insinuated that the outrage had been provoked by 
 some family difficulty, and suggested that the brothers of my 
 husband's second, and now divorced, wife were the offenders. 
 This I knew was utterly false, for they were respectable young 
 men who would have scorned such an action, and between 
 them and my husband not the slightestili feeling existed. | 
 
BRIGHAM AFRAID OF PERJURY ! 58,3 
 
 therefore sent a letter to Belinda, telluig her what had been 
 said and asking her to ■wrrite to me stating that it was all 
 untrue. I felt sure that she would willingly comply with my 
 request, and I proposed, as I informed her, to publish her 
 reply, and thus exonerate her brothers from all blame. 
 
 A lady who was present when Belinda ]:eceived the note, 
 told me that she asked her mother, who was also there at the 
 time, what she should do about it, and that her mother said — 
 " You had better take the letter to Brother Brigham, and do 
 whatever he counsels you to do." She did so, and Brother 
 Brigham told her to'^ay no attention to it. Brigham did not 
 care whether her brothers or any one else were disgraced, or 
 who was made the scapegoat, so that the vile minions of the 
 Priesthood might escape undetected. 
 
 The suggestion that a personal difficulty or a family matter 
 had provoked the outrage was by no means a new one. In the 
 same way the " Indians " had been credited with many a deed 
 of blood when Apostates fleeing from Zion were found mur- 
 dered and horribly mangled in the Canons or on the Plains. 
 The same course also was adopted when Dr. Robinson, of 
 whom I have already spoken, was assassinated. On the fol- 
 lowing Sunday, in the Tabernacle, Brigham Young suggested 
 that the doctor had met his death in a gambling quarrel, and 
 that some man whom he had personally wronged had dealt the 
 fatal blow. But every one in Sa^t Lake City — whether Mor- 
 mon or Gentile, Brigham Young included — knew that Dr. 
 Robinson was innocent of any gambling predilections, and 
 was the last man to make a personal enemy. Then Brigham 
 offered a reward of five hundred dollars for the discovery of 
 the murderers ; but subsequently, when several of the brethren 
 had been arrested, charged with that very crime, and indict- 
 ments against them had been foynd by the Grand Jury, he 
 withdrew his offer lest, as he said, some evil-minded person 
 might commit perjury for the sake of the reward ! 
 
 It was the same with ourselves. Every one could conjec- 
 ture with tolerable accuracy who it was that had planned the 
 outrage, but the reward which was offered was, as we well 
 
5^4 THE RESULT OF TABERNACLE TEACHINGS. 
 
 knew it would be, all in vain. Good Mormons did not dare to 
 express their thoughts ; but we all knew thai the outrage was 
 the direct result of the teachings o£ the Tabernacle, and that 
 although the authorities might not, and proTiably did not, 
 directly command it, they connived at it, and never took the 
 first step towards the discovery of the wretched scoundrels 
 who perpetrated the deed. 
 
CH.APTER XL II. 
 
 AMUSING TROUBLES OF MY TALKATIVE FRIEND— CHAR- 
 LOTTE WITH THE GOLDEN HAIR ! 
 
 Another Visit from my Talkative Friend — A preliminary Fuss — " The picture of 
 Despair?"— He did it on Purpose— "That little Shrimp of a Girl"— Hei 
 red hair : "Charlotte's hair is Celden!"-~K Little Hasty !— An Ol^ect ef Ih- 
 
 , lErtSt — "Myhuslland is a Man" — "You dn't calculate a Man" — A nice 
 Question of Privilege— Rather too much to Manage — A nice Young Woman 
 of Thirty-Five or so ! — Stout in Proportion — Old enough to be his Grand- 
 awther, and Squinted — Getting used to a proposed Bride — Watching a Ten- 
 ant Husband — N»t the least Jealous ? — A curious kind of Church-Meeting !— t 
 Keeping up his Dignity — " Enjoying themselves without met " — A little " Un? 
 pleasantness " — Charlotte's Scratched Face — She didn't like such " Acci- 
 dents " — " My Henry and that Girl ! " — Millinery and Prayers — Bringing a 
 Husband to Reason — Wife against Wife — Too busy to Apostatise. 
 
 NOT long after our separation from the Mormon Church, I 
 received another visit from my talkative friend. 
 
 As according to her custom she was making a prelirainarjt 
 "fuss" at the door before enteting, I heard her voice, and was 
 at a loss to conjecture whether she came for the purpose of 
 lamenting my apostacy and entreating my immediate return 
 to the bosom of Tthe Church, or to condole with me concern- 
 ing the brutal outrage to which we had been subjected. In 
 both suppositions I waS, however, mistaken— she came to talk 
 about her own woes. 
 
 "You'll be surprised, my (dear Sister Stenhouse," she sai(i 
 " to see me looking so Utterly, miserable. I'm sure I must 
 l^ok the picture of dteSpalr, and I feel it. You don't know 
 
586 "HE DID IT ON purpose!" 
 
 what I've been suffering, and how shamefully I have been 
 used." 
 
 " You look very well I think, but 'I'm sorry to hear you have 
 met with any difficulty," said I, when she stopped for a mo- 
 ment to take breath. 
 
 " Oh, you may say so," she replied, " but you know you 
 don't think so in your heart. Why, I did not even stop to put 
 on my bonnet straight," she said, stealing a look at the glass, 
 " and I ran all the way here, for I felt as if I should die if I 
 could not pour my sorrows into the bosOrii of some faithful- 
 hearted friend. Oh ! I have been treated shamefully, and I 
 feel it the more as you know what a reserved woman I am and 
 how seldom it is that I open my lip^ about family matters, 
 even to my dearest friends ! " 
 
 , " Well, but," I said, " what really is the matter > You have 
 not yet told me what your trouble is." 
 
 " Sister Stenhouse," she said, " you have had a few little 
 vexations in the course of your life, I know, but they are 
 nothing to compare to the frightful indignities that I have 
 suffered in the course of the last few days. I never thought 
 I should come to this ! I hate eVery man in the place, and I 
 detest my husband most of all, and I loathe his wives, and I 
 execrate Brother Brig — " 
 
 " Why, Sister Ann, what can have happened .' " I exclaimed, 
 interrupting her. 
 
 " Happened ! " she cried, starting from her chair in indigna- 
 tion, " I tell you, Sister Stenhouse, nothing has ' happened' — 
 nothing was done by chance — he did it all with his eyes open 
 and against my advice — I tell you he did '\\: on pii.rpose !" 
 
 " Did w/tai ? " I asked, " and who was it that did it ? " But 
 by this time I had begun to form a shrewd 'guess as to who 
 the culprit was. 
 
 " Why, he married that wretched little shrimp of a girl, with 
 blue eyes, and red hair, and a die-away, lackadaisical manner- 
 it was he — my husband, Henry— he married her this very day, 
 and I tell you he did it on purpose !" 
 
 " I'm sorry that it annoys you," I said, " but really I am sur- 
 
CHARLOTTE WITH THE GOLDEN HAIR. 5S7 
 
 prised after all you have said to me that you should care if he 
 had taken half-a-dozen wives, to say nothing of the one he 
 married this morning, and who you say is only a very little 
 one. 
 
 " It doesn't matter the size. Sister Stenhouse," she said, " but 
 the color of the eyes and the shade of the hair matters a great 
 deal. If that miserable little minx had had black hair or green 
 eyes I daresay Henry would not have cared two straws about 
 her, unless he had done it out of sheer perversity, for all men 
 are made of the same contrary stuff. But he dotes on blue eyes ; 
 I heard him myself tell her so one day, when I was listening 
 to them through the crack of the door, and they didn't know I 
 was so near. But my wounded feelings would not suffer me 
 to remain silent, and I bounced in, and, said I, — Henry, how 
 dare you talk such outrageous nonsense to that child in my 
 presence ? 
 
 " ' But I didn't know you were present,' he said. 
 
 " I tell you," said I, " I'm quite disgusted with you ; a man 
 with three wives — and me one of them — to go talking twaddle 
 to a little chattering hussy like that, with her cat's eyes and 
 her red hair 1 " 
 
 " ' Golden hair, my dear,' he said, ' Charlotte's hair is golden.' 
 
 " I say red/ — it's straight, staring red — as red as red can be^ 
 I told him ; and then we had a regular fight over it. I don't 
 mean that we came to blows, but we had some hot words, and 
 he went out and left us two alone. Then that young hussy 
 was impudent, and I don't know how it was, but, somehoviTi 
 when we left off our conversation I found some of Charlotte's 
 red hair between my fingers ; and there" — she said, innocently, 
 holding out quite a respectable sized tuft of auburn hair, — 
 " there ; I put it to you, Sister Stenhouse, is that red, or is it 
 not.?" 
 
 I was about to reply ; but, without waiting an instant, she 
 dashed the stolen locks to the ground, and said — " I daresay 
 Sister Stenhouse, you think me a little hasty, and yet among 
 my friends I've always been quite proverbial for the calmness 
 and evenness of my temper ; but I've been tried very much 
 
5"8S THE PROVERBIAL CONSTANCY O? WOMEN ! 
 
 lately, and — if only you wouM' not keep hiterrtipting itie, dear ! — 
 if you'd just allow me to say a word of two in my turn ! — I'd 
 tell you something that would open your eyes to the ingrati- 
 tude and wickedness of men. I don't wonder that you have 
 left the Church ; I am thinking of doing so myself, and you 
 won't wonder at it when you hear what I've got to say. What 
 do you say to my feaving the Church .' Won*t people be 
 astonished ? But I declare, Sister Stenhouse, I do seriously 
 mean to leave the Church as soon as Iget my new bonnet^— " 
 
 "Why your new bonnet ?" I asked in surprise. 
 
 " Because, dear, I shaH become an object of interest. All 
 the sisters will have their eyes upon me, and even Gentiles 
 will say — -There's a lady who had the Courage to leave the 
 Mormon Church and quit an ungrateful husband who was not 
 worthy of her. Atid you know, Sister Stenhouse, it would nrot 
 do to have people looking at me and talking about me before 1 
 got my new bonnet." 
 
 This was a rather amusing reason for delay in changing 
 one's religion, but it was quite characteristic of my friend. S6 
 i humored her a little and tried to get her to explain how it 
 all came about. 
 
 " Oh yes," she said, " I ought to have told you that before, but 
 I was so angry at what had just happened that I forgot every- 
 thing else. The fact is, my husband is a man, and there's no 
 calculating what a man will do. Women, you know, are pro- 
 verbial for the constancy of their affections and their slowness 
 in Changing their minds — you kno* when you're talking to a 
 woman that she is a woman, and you know exactly what to do 
 with her ; but with a man it's quite different. You can't calr 
 culate a man — ^you can't fathom him. When you've been 
 thinking one way and another, and at last tfegin to fanqy you 
 know what to do, why then, a man^if .it's him you've got to 
 do with — will turn just round, and ^hilie you've been making 
 everything smooth for him to do one thing, he'll go and do 
 exactly the opposite. I know what men are by this time, and 
 I speak from experience. 
 - " It was just so with Hehry and this girl. He has goflt 
 
RATHER :mORE THAN SHE COULD mS.NAGE. 589' 
 
 qmite against the grain with me, and I feel it all the more be- 
 cause he used to be so quiet and anjdous to do exacUy what I 
 wanted. But he doesn't care a fig now whether I'm pleased 
 or mot — he omiy thinks about this red-headed girl. In fact he's 
 quite crazy about h«r, and if there's any sin in apostacy, you 
 may remember that it was he who drove me iiito it." 
 
 "That seems hardly fair," I said, " for you knew all along 
 that it was his privilege to take more wives." 
 
 " That's very true," she exclaimed, " it is his privilege to 
 take wives, but it's m)t^ privilege to choose them for him. I'm 
 a good Mormon and I don't mind how many wives my hus- 
 band takes, if he'll only act reasonably about getting them. 
 But, Sister Stenhcjuse, I do not want a parcel of girls about tfce 
 hou^e. I'm so far from wishing to usurp authority, (hat, as I 
 told Henry, I would not mind if his wives were even a little 
 dder than me, but I won't have them, younger. It makes 
 Henry look so silly. Why, to see him with that girl Charlotte,, 
 now, who isn't mofe than half my own age-^No ; I don't m^n 
 that, I mean she's slightly younger than I am — ^you might 
 really almost imagine that he thought more of her than he 
 does of me, I know he doesn't, for he has told me so, but 
 any one to see them together would get quite a wrong im- 
 puession." 
 
 " When did he marry Charlotte V I asked. " You spoke so 
 hastily, Sister Ann, that I did not quite understand you." 
 
 "When .' Why he married her this morning, as I thought 
 I, tdld you — he has only just done it. — 'He said he was anxious 
 to be in a quiet state of mind to-day, so I gave him a piece of 
 »9" mind, and he was so astonished at the pointed way in 
 which I explained to him what a fool he'd been making of 
 hinKelf that he quite showed it in his face. The fact is. Sister 
 Stenhouse, he has lately become rather more than I could 
 manage. About six months ago he: seemed, I thought, to -be 
 S^XSig a little inattentive to his last wife, so I thought it was 
 quite time for me to see about finding him another. Sq I 
 looked round, but didn't for some time meet with a suitable 
 person. At last I found a very nice young woman, thirty-five 
 
590 A NICE, MOTHERLY WOMAN ! 
 
 or forty years of age, who I thought would do. She was nice 
 and tall— a little taller than Henry himself, but that didn't 
 matter for she was stout in proportion. Henry would have it 
 that she didn't look straight with her two eyes, but that was 
 all nonsense. She was a nice, motherly woman, with a deep 
 bass voice which sounds so well in large, fat women ; but 
 though she wasn't what you would call handsome, she certainly 
 wasn't plain. My reason in choosing her was that I thought 
 she would do nicely for the housework and could look after 
 the children, for I was forced to stay at home so much that it 
 was quite injuring my health." 
 
 " A very good reason," I said. 
 
 " So I thought, dear," she replied ; " but I could not bring 
 Henry to see it in that light. Whenever I spoke to him 
 about her he said she was old enough to be his grand-i 
 mother, and squinted. At last I got quite tired out, for I 
 could never get him to call upon her, and when she came to 
 the house he hardly said a word to her ; so I got her to come 
 and stay with us, for then I thought Henry would become 
 accustomed to her presence. But he took to holding' his 
 tongue at meal times — the only times when we all met 
 together — and it was as much as I could do to keep up the 
 conversation, for you know I am naturally very taciturn. 
 Then he suddenly took to attending all the Church meetings, 
 and it was astonishing how many he discovered it was his duty 
 to attend, he seemed to be absent almost every evening. The 
 mystery to me was, what could have made him so pious all of 
 a sudden — he seemed altogether too good — You can under- 
 stand. Sister StenhouSe, that had there been any young girl 
 at the meetings, to whom he had taken a fancy, it would have 
 been useless for them to try to throw dust in my eyes — you 
 know that /';« not likely to be deceived.'" 
 
 I said that I did know it, and she continued: — 
 
 "There was one of the brethren — a near neighbor of ours, 
 vi\o, between ourselves, I think rather admires me, for he said 
 once quite publicly that I beat every one he knew in conver- 
 sation, and if that's not a compliment, I don't know what is: — ■ 
 
DOUBLY watchful! jqi ; 
 
 well, this brother I got to watch nly husband. I told him that 
 I did not want him to act as a spy upon his movements, as 
 that would have been very mean. I only wanted him to watch 
 carefully all that he said and did at the meetings and to notice 
 who he spoke to, and if it was a meeting where women were 
 admitted, to be doubly watchful, and especially to notice how 
 he looked when he talked with any one. You see, Sister, I 
 agree with you that it is quite right for us to look closely after 
 our husbands, although, of course, I would be the last one to 
 encourage a system of espionage'.' 
 
 I ventured to suggest that I had not expressed any opinion 
 at all about watching our husbands, and said I believed there 
 were not half-a-dozen women in Salt Lake City who would 
 dare to think of such a thing. 
 
 "Well, never mind all that, Sister Stenhouse," she said, "If 
 you did not have that opinion you might have had it, and it 
 comes to much the same thing. I used to see the good brother 
 I spoke of very frequently — in fact, almost every day — and the 
 first question I always asked was — Did my husband; come to 
 meeting last night } As often as not he said he didn't know for 
 he hadn't been himself, and after a month or more I had learned 
 nothing, except that my husband was never seen with a lady 
 at- any of the meetings. This was all very well ; but so cer- 
 tain was I that all his dressing and titivation was not done for 
 nothing, and that he wouldn't be so pious without expecting to 
 get something in return — for he is a very good and sensible 
 man in all religious matters — that I resolved to take the 
 whole affair in hand .myself, and ferret out the mystery, if 
 there really was one. The very next night he went out as 
 usual, and I, having dressed myself in readiness, followed him. 
 But we hadn't gone two minutes walk before I met the brother 
 I just mentioned, and, of course, I was compelled to stop and 
 tell him all about it ; and, by the time we left off, my husband 
 was out of sight and it was no good looking after him. Some 
 people, when they begin to talk, you never know when they'll 
 end, and this good brother is one of them — ^you can't edge in 
 aiyord. 
 
592l BROTHER HEJ^Bir'S. *' CHURCH-MEETING ! " 
 
 "Well, you s^e, now I was out it seemed a pity to go houie, 
 without calling upon some one ; so ' I went round to Sistser 
 Ellis. They told me she was out and I was just going away 
 when» lo and behold, who should I see but my dear Henry 
 ma,rching down the street in the direction of the theatre with 
 a red-headed girl hanging on his arm. Oh, said I to m)r5eM, 
 that's the kind of Church-meetii\g you go to my dear, is it.' 
 They were so busy with one another — I never saw Henry 
 Ipok worse or more stupid in my life — that they didn't see me 
 at all. I did not cross over to them, for I felt too much com- 
 passion for their folly to wish to interrupt them then. Go on, 
 my dears, I thought; make the most of your opportunity for. 
 I'll answer that otze of you won'* go to the theatre again for, 
 some time. 1 wasn't the least bit jealous — jealousy is a sen- 
 timent that could never xiwell in mj: bosom — but I did hate 
 the sight of that odious girl, and I resolved to take my husband, 
 in hand immediately." 
 
 "Well Sister," I said, "I should have thought that his finding 
 a wife for himself would have saved you a world of trouble." 
 
 " Oh dear no. Sister Stenhouse," she replied, "it was trouble 
 I did not want to be saved. Men ha,ve no business, in my 
 opinion, to choose their own wives, after the first. I know the 
 men do do it, one and all ; but it's a shameful stretch of authority. 
 I should like to know whether it is not of much more conse- 
 quence to me what wife my husband has than it is to him? 
 However, I resolved that my husband should never marry the 
 red-headed girl, and the very next morning I told him so, and 
 what do you think the inhuman creature said? 'You've been, 
 persuading me all these years,' he said, ' to take another wife, 
 although I've already got three, and now I've begun to do so 
 you blame me. I think I've as good a right as any one to say 
 who I'll marry and who I won't.' Did you ever hear of such 
 ingratitude? Would you hear of such a thing from ^ouf 
 husband. Sister Stenhouse?" 
 
 I told her that with Mormonism my husband had given up 
 Polygamy ; and she continued : 
 
 "V^ellj I tried to bring him to reason, but it was of no use. 
 
" WAS IT NOT SHAMEFUL ? " 59 j " 
 
 And then I told him that the girl should never set foot inside 
 the house while I was in it. This was a very unfortunate 
 speech, for I do believe that up to that time he wanted as 
 much as possible to keep the girl out of my way ; but the 
 moment I said that, to show his dignity I suppose, he declared 
 that she should come to tea with us that very afternoon, and 
 he would go and fetch her; and he did so. I wouldn't go 
 down to tea at first, though both the other wives were there 
 and he sent up for me, but my pride would not allow me to 
 stoop. At last I go* tired of being all alone, and as it occurred 
 to me that perhaps they might be enjoying themselves with- 
 out me, I resolved to go down and see if I could not do 
 something to annoy them. Down I went, and Henry, all 
 smiling, introduced the girl to me as ' Sister Charlotte,' talking' 
 of her as if he had known her for years. Was it not 
 shameful .-' " 
 
 " It must have been very awkward for you," I said. 
 
 "It was indeed. Sister Stenhouse, and I soon made it 
 awkward for them; I assure you, after I joined them, there 
 was not a soul present who had a moment's comfort till that 
 girl went away. My husband, however, took her home, and 
 from that very day he seemed resolved to have the upper 
 hand. He never for a moment would listen to a word I said 
 about the girl ; he brqught her in every evening and took her 
 to the theatre cdnstantly, and paid her ten times more atten- 
 tion than he ever paid me. I wasn't jealous, Sister Stenhouse ; 
 no one — as I said before — could ever suspect me of jealousy, 
 but I did hate that girl. If he had not loved her, I can't say 
 whether I myself might not have liked her. But the very 
 fact of him loving her makes me detest her, but its only a 
 little proper pride on my part — I'm not in the least jealous, 
 Oh dear no!" 
 
 "Of course not," I said. 
 
 "I don't know about that," she said, "I've borne enough, 
 from those two to drive fifty women crazy with jealousy, and 
 things went on from bad to worse, until the other day \yhen, 
 as I told you, we had that little unpleasantness. My husband 
 
 36 
 
594 "THAT DETESTABLE, LITTLE VIXEN ! " 
 
 vjr-hen he came back was downright angry, and made use of 
 shocking language, and told me that, if he could not have 
 peace in the house, he would have me board out by myself in 
 some other part of the city. He said that I had scratched 
 charlotte's face and torn out her hair; but that was quite 
 untrue, as I told him ; and as for the hair which fell out, it was 
 all an accident. He said that Charlotte did not like such acci- 
 dents and that he would not put up with it. He was very 
 cross and disagreeable all the rest of the day and made me 
 quite miserable and broken hearted, and the next day, to wind 
 it all up, he told me that he and Charlotte had arranged the 
 day of the wedding. I stormed and raved, for I had fully 
 resolved that, marry whom he might, he should never marry a, 
 girl if he really loved her or if I had not chosen her. But it 
 was of no use — I was forced to go over with him to the 
 Endowment House to give him that detestable little vixen. I 
 tell you. Sister Stenhouse, I hate her; and oh, oh, dear what 
 shall I do now my husband has fallen in love with her ! " 
 
 Here, to my infinite astonishment, she rose from her seat 
 and rushed about the room, wringing her hands and exclaim-, 
 ing, "Oh dear! Oh dear!" She then threw herself right 
 down on the couch and actually burst into tears, crying out 
 " Oh dear, what shall I do with my Henry and that girl ! *' 
 
 I raised her up and tried to comfort her as well as I could, 
 but she was a very awkward woman to deal with under such 
 circumstances. The more gently I spoke to her, the more 
 violent did she become, and the louder were her lamentations., 
 She forgot that she had been the cause of her husband taking 
 any plural wives at all, and she upbraided him as the source 
 of all her woes. One moment she would denounce him as a 
 heartless wretch : then she would go into fits of maudlin sym- 
 pathy over him, declaring that her Henry was the dearest man 
 alive until "that horrid red-headed girl" led him astray. "Oh 
 dear, dear Sister Stenhouse," she exclaimed as she threw both 
 her arms round my neck and covered me with tears, — "never 
 do as I have done — never get a wife for your husband again, 
 or he'll learn to do it for himself. And, oh, Sister Stenhouse 
 
MAKIKG A WEbDlNG-DAY PLEASANT ! 595 
 
 let US kneel down and ask the Lord to streijgthen us in this 
 hour of tribulation ; and, oh," she added piteously, " I should 
 take it such a very great favor. Sister, if you wouldn't mind 
 trimming that bonnet for me — you've got such taste!" ' 
 
 I assured her that I would trim the bonnet or do anything 
 else that would help to assuage her grief. So she had her cry 
 out and then she went on talking. She stopped and had some 
 lunch, and still she talked ; and at last when a little girl came 
 round with a message from her husband saying that she was 
 wanted at home, sljf left me in the middle of a long speech in 
 Which she was explaining the steps which she meant to take 
 to bring her Henry "to reason," and to compel him to obtain 
 a divorce from "that red-headed hussy." 
 
 The same evening she came again. This time she brought 
 with her the bonnet and the materials for trimming it, and I 
 promised her that she should have but a little while, to wait ; 
 for she said she was overflowing with anxiety to quit the Mor- 
 mon Church, and she felt convinced that that could not properly 
 be done by any one wearing an old or dowdy bonnet. She 
 had had a warm time with the bride and bridegroom, and 
 seemed quite cheerful at the thought that she had thoroughly 
 spoilt the happiness of their wedding-day, for she had left 
 them both with ruffled tempers and in the worst of humors. 
 After that she was almost always with me until the bonnet 
 was finished, which was not until a couple of days later, for I 
 was delayed by some more important matters which unexpect- 
 edly engaged my attention ; and when she went away she was 
 as lavish with her thanks and praises as she was with her 
 .promises respecting the mighty things which she was going to 
 do, and the bright example she would become to the women of. 
 Utah. 
 
 I did not see her for several weeks, and then I accidentally 
 met her in the street, and asked her why she had not called 
 upon me lately. She was wearing the new bonnet, but I had 
 heard nothing about her apostacy. 
 
 "Oh, Sister Stenhouse;' she said, "I'm delighted to see you !' 
 You've been constantly in my thoughts, but I've been so hard 
 
59^ TOO BUSY TO APOSTATISE. 
 
 at work — Oh, so busy, that I really had not time for anything 
 — not even to apostatise." 
 
 " Mow was that ? " I asked. 
 
 "Oh," she replied, "when I thought over the matter I saw 
 very clearly that it wouldn't do to render myself conspicuous 
 with this old dress. The bonnet's very nice and I want to 
 thank you, dear, for the trimming ; but I must wait till I get 
 that silk dress which Henry says I really shall have soon. 
 I'm not so very sure though whether he would give me the 
 dress if I were to apostatise, so I'd better wait and get it first. 
 Then, too, you see I've had my hands fiill. If you want to 
 make a man slight one woman and get tired of her, there's 
 nothing like putting a nicer woman than her in his way. So 
 I reconsidered the matter and resolved, cost what it might, 
 I'd get another wife for my husband right away. I don't care 
 now whether she's old or young, ugly or pretty,. so long as she 
 cuts out that detestable red-headed girl. I've run all over the 
 town and rushed about here and there, all for his sake, though 
 he'll never be grateful for it ; and now at last, do you know, 
 dear, I really do think I've got the girl I want. She's all dark 
 — dark hair, dark eyes, dark complexion. If he marries her, 
 as I mean him to do, she'll lead him a fine life, notwithstand- 
 ing all her winning ways. I wouldn't stand in his shoes when 
 she's his wife ; but I know l shall be able to manage her, for I 
 have a deeper insight into character than he has, and a better 
 command of temper. She'll teach Miss Charlotte to keep her 
 place, and she'll make Henry mind too. It'll do him good; — : 
 I've done it all out of love to him, not a spark of jealousy or 
 ill feeling, as you are well aware." 
 
 The idea of setting one wife against another, in order to 
 keep the peace, would appear in the case of my talkative 
 friend to have been successful ; for, sure enough, six months 
 after the time of which I have just spoken, her Henry did 
 marry the dark beauty, and she and her auburn predecessor 
 presented an interesting contrast when they chanced to appear 
 in the street together in the company of their husband. There 
 ^id not seem to be much love lost between them. 
 
"at least seven wives!" 597 
 
 Successful in her plans, and having, as she said, now 
 brought her Henry to reason, my talkative friend gave up all 
 idea of leaving' the Church, and when I last saw her she said 
 "I'm busy now looking after a likely girl, for I do think a man 
 in my Henry's position ought to live his religion and have at 
 least seven wives t — seven, you know, is such a very lucky 
 aumber" 
 
CHAPTER XLIII.' 
 
 AFTER WE LEFT THE CHURCH— INTERESTING FACTS AND 
 FIGURES— THE MORMONISM AND MORMONS OF TO-DAY. 
 
 After We Left the Church — Beginning Life Afresh — The Coldness of Our 
 Former Friends-^Disposing of the Daily Telegraph — How Fuller Flourished : 
 Ran a Paper and Ran Away — Our New Position — My Husband Goes East—* 
 Effects of the "New Movement" — "Zion's Co-operative Mercantile Insti- 
 tution" — Brigham's Store — "Country-folks Seeking After a Sign" — An Old, 
 Lady's Stock in the " Coop "—A Pound and a half of Nails !— The " Order of 
 Enoch "—The Crowning Swindle !— The Very Vilest Slavery of All— How 
 Reporters and Visitors are Fooled by Brigham — The Ladies' Petitions — Legal- 
 ising the Marriage of Children ! — The Franchise Conferred on Mormon 
 Women — How Unanimously they Vote ! — The Ballot Farce in Utah — How 
 they Allowed the Mules to Vote ! — Finery verstis Faith — ^The Position in Utah 
 To-day — The Apostacy of Brother Brigham's Son — Some Singular Statistics^ 
 Undoing the Past, 
 
 " The world was all before them where to choose 
 Their place of rest : with Providence their guide, 
 They hand in hand with trembling steps and slow, 
 Through Eden took their solitary way." 
 
 Paradise Lost. 
 
 WHEN we left the Mormon Church, we were not quite as 
 badly off as were our first parents when they began life, 
 although in some respects we certainly resembled them. The 
 world was all before us, and it was necessary that we also 
 
THE CRISIS Ot OtJR LIVES. 599 
 
 should choose a place of rest; but it was by no means an 
 Eden from which we were dismissed,— or, rather, had dis- 
 missed ourselves, — and in the matter of experience in the 
 thorny ways of that world in which we were about to begin 
 affesh the battle of existence, we certainly had the advantage 
 over the exiles from Paradise. 
 
 The crisis of our own lives had now arrived ; — the act of 
 •sending in our resignation as members of the Church cut us 
 off from all the associations of the past and all the friendships 
 and pleasant intimacies of so many years ; — a great gulf divided 
 our by-gone life from the unknown future which lay before us. 
 
 My husband was now made painfully aware that it was alto- 
 gether useless for him to attempt to carry on his paper, for his 
 subscribers, as I before stated, had been "counselled" to dis- 
 continue taking it in. The Batly Telegraph had had a very 
 large circulation, but as there was very little money in the 
 Territory, the yearly subscriptions were mostly paid at harvest 
 time, and many of them in grain. At the time, therefore 
 when the paper wa:s finally given up, the Mormon people, as 
 the book-keeper in Ogden informed me, owed about twenty 
 thousand dollars ; but when it was discovered that we were 
 "Apostates," the majority of them considered that they were 
 released from all obligations on that score, and my husband 
 being an easy, generous-minded man, most of them evaded 
 payment. The idea that, because we had left the Church, no 
 Saint was bound to pay us any debts which they might hap- 
 pen at the time to owe, was the natural result of the teachings 
 of the Tabernacle. Apostates are delivered over to "the 
 buffetings of Satan," and the Saints consider it is their duty 
 to begin in this world their master's work of castigation. Any 
 ill turn that can be done to an Apostate is consequently a 
 good action in the opinion of the Mormons, and they neglect 
 no opportunity of showing that these afe the sentiments which 
 influence them. 
 
 Although we had now left the Mormon Church, never to 
 return, my husband could not at once shake off entirely that 
 influence which had so long held him captive. His thoughts 
 
600 BEGINNIXG LIFE AFRESH.; 
 
 3.nd belief, his hopes and ambitions, had for a quarter of a 
 century all pointed in one direction^ and the very idea of 
 rebellion on his part against the authority of the Priesthood, 
 would, but a very little while before the time of which I speak,, 
 have been considered by him an utter impossibility. It was 
 impossible, in a few short months only, to undo the work of 
 five-and-twenty years— the best years of his life. He could 
 no longer remain, in the Church or conscientiously support 
 Brigham Young ; but he had not outgrown Mormonism suiifl- 
 ciently to enable him to throw off the yoke entirely and make 
 his paper an opponent of Brigham and his faith. Could h^ 
 have done so, I think it is highly probable that the Telegraph 
 might yet have been saved, for I know that many of the more 
 influential of the Gentiles would' have aided him materially in 
 such a course. As it was, nothing remained but to give it up 
 with th^ best grace he could. 
 
 Two offers in reference to the paper were received by Mr. 
 Stenhouse, and it remained for him to decide which he would 
 accept. , One of them came from a Gentile, who proppsed to 
 run it in opposition to Brigham Young, and the other came 
 from a certain Mr. Fuller, who had for some time been my 
 husband's travelling agent, and was a very intimate friend of 
 John W. Young, Brigham's youngest son by his first wife. 
 We knew that this Mr. Fuller had nothing beyond his salary, 
 but, as the friend of Brigham's son, we thought that probably 
 it was the Prophet's wish that he should have this paper and 
 we believed that he was simply buying it for the Church. My 
 husband argued that, although he could no longer unite with 
 the Mormons, he could at least refrain from doing them any 
 injury ; he therefore concluded that, rather than let the paper 
 go into the hands of an avowed enemy, he would sell it to Mr. 
 Fuller, who, on account of his friendship for the Prophet's 
 family, wsould, he presumed, try to be just to the people. 
 
 This, no doubt, was very conscientious and just; although, 
 of course, no Mormon would give my husband credit for en- 
 tertaining such sentiments. For my own part, I naturally 
 wished him to accept the offer that would pay him best, which 
 
OUR NEW POSITION. 6o^ 
 
 was that made by the Gentile. He could not, however, bring 
 his mind to do this. The paper, therefore, was sold to Mr. 
 Fuller, who ran it for a few months and then himself ran 
 away, leaving behind him debts enough to swallow up every- 
 thing. Thus ended the Telegraph under that name, but des- 
 tined, however, to rise again as the Salt Lake Herald-^z paper 
 devoted to the interests of Brigham and the Priesthood. To 
 my husband it was an utter loss, but it was hardly fair that 
 his conscientious conduct should meet with such an ill return. 
 It was now necessary that some steps should be taken to 
 provide for our family. The reader may, perhaps, remember 
 that when we first arrived in Salt Lake City, as I stated/ 1 my- 
 self engaged in business until my husband was able to find 
 some suitable and profitable employment. When the Tele- 
 graph, however, was established and proved such a great suc- 
 cess, and we were in a position of affluence, I considered — the 
 pressure of necessity being removed — that I should do well to 
 resign my own business connection and employ my time more 
 profitably in domestic affairs. This was a great relief to me, 
 for I always felt considerable repugnance to mixing with the 
 world in the way of business, while among my children arid 
 attending to their wants and interests I found myself in my 
 own legitimate sphere. But there was now no alternative. 
 All interest in the Telegraph had been resigned ; my hus- 
 band's property had been wasted in an attempt to keep it up, 
 and he had nothing now to depend upon. Something must 
 be done, and I resolved that I would not be backward in bear- 
 ing my full share of the burden. 
 
 , It was only natural that we should feel very much unsettled 
 in mind by the great change which had taken place in our 
 position, for it is no easy matter to cut asunder the ties and 
 associations of a life-time. Any one suddenly changing his 
 religious faith would, to a certain extent, feel and understand 
 what I mean in this respect. But in reference to any ordinary 
 religion, the person forsaking it would probably experience 
 comparatively little alteration in his every-day hfe. ^ In Mor- 
 monism it is very different, especially to any one who has 
 
603 THE BREAKING OF BdNDS. 
 
 occupied a prominent position among the Saints. To resign 
 our religion was to revolutionize our lives. Every thing was 
 changed : the friends of years would look coldly on us and 
 avoid us ; persons whom we had before shunned as Gentiles 
 or Apostates would be the only individuals who would regard 
 us with favor ;— our entire position in the midst of a most ex- 
 clusive community was completely reversed ; in a word, we 
 ourselves were now " Apostates ! " 
 
 Thinking to turn the current of his thoughts, and believing 
 that change would be beneficial to him, I suggested to my hus- 
 band that he should pay a visit to the Eastern States. In 
 New York I believed he could find employment which would 
 help to divert his thoughts from Mormon affairs and, at the 
 same time, would be profitable to him in other respects. « My 
 suggestion was acted upon, and my husband set out East, 
 while I prepared to engage again in the same business which 
 I had formerly conducted so successfully. 
 
 Now, for the first time since I embraced Mormonism, I 
 mixed freely with Gentiles and those who had left the Church, 
 and it was not long before I found that this intercourse with 
 the outer world produced a marked and decided effect upon 
 my mind. My views were enlarged and my thoughts became 
 more liberal in their tone. My husband's letters showed me 
 -that a similar change was taking place in him. 
 
 We were not the only Apostates from the Church at that 
 time. The New Movement, as the reaction against the 
 tyranny of Brigham Young was called, was then in progress ; 
 and the minds of all intelligent Saints were led to reflect upon 
 the unheard-of claims of Brigham's " Infallible " Priesthood. 
 At this time the Prophet endeav®red to rivet still more firmly 
 the fetters which bound his dduded followers, by establishing 
 " Zion's Cooperative Mercantile Institution " and reviving 
 the " Oi^er of Enoch." 
 
 The Cooperative Institution was announced as a joint-stock 
 concern, established under the pretence that it would be a 
 benefit to the working classes, and all the members of the 
 Church were invited tp purchase shares, which were sold at 
 
THE "CO-OP," 603 
 
 twenty-five dollars each. The statement so often made by 
 Brigham and repeated by strangers, to the effect that the ex- 
 orbitant prices charged by Gentile merchants necessitated the 
 establishment of such an institution was, as every Mormon 
 knows, only a pretence, and a very shallow one, too ; for the 
 Walker Brothers and other merchants had, for many years, 
 supplied goods to Mormons and Gentiles alike, at what, under 
 the circumstances, were reasonable and just prices; for the 
 railway not then being constructed, and every article of com- 
 merce being of nec^sity carried across the Plains — a dis- 
 tance of over a thousand, miles—- by horse-teams, prices were, 
 of course, very high, and would, if this circumstance were not 
 taken into consideration, appear extortionate. In fact, subse- 
 quently, the " Cooperative " stores, which had started with high 
 rates, under the belief that every rival would be crushed, were 
 compelled to lower their prices to those of the Walker Broth- 
 ers, or, in spite of their faith, the Mormons would have for- 
 saken Brigham's Institution for the sake of their pockets. 
 Many, in fact, did secretly go to Gentile stores, but they were 
 watched by the police and reported to the teachers. 
 
 .That large Mormon store, in which Brigham Young had 
 such a heavy interest, was to become the parent establishment, 
 the fountain-head from which temporal blessings, in the shape 
 of cheap goods of every description, were to flow unto the 
 people. Each Ward was to have its own store, and there the 
 Saints of that Ward were expected to deal exclusively, and, as 
 the teachers said, " keep off Main street where the Gentile 
 stores were located." These Ward-stores purchased their 
 goods from the parent store where nothing was sold by whole- 
 sale. 
 
 All the lesser Mormon Merchants were " counselled " to sell 
 out their stock to the Church, for just what the Church chose 
 to offer them, or dispose of it otherwise as best they could, 
 and then they might go farming, or on mission, or anything 
 else — but sell out they must, for they were plainly told that they 
 would not be allowed to carry on business in opposition to the 
 new Institution. 
 
,6CJ4 SEEKiNG AFTER A' SIGN ! 
 
 Now, instead of benefitting the' poorer Saints, by supplying 
 goods to them at a small advance upon cost prices, as was at 
 first proclaimed to be the objefct of the "Co-op" — as the In- 
 stitution was briefly and familiarly called — the reverse was the 
 case, for competition was altogether banished. All the trade 
 of the Gentile merchants — with one or two exceptions — was 
 forcibly taken from them, for the people were not to trade in 
 any store without first looking to see if the sign of the Insti- 
 tution — a picture of " The All-seeing Eye," and the words 
 " Holiness Unto the Lord " — were over the door-way. How 
 often I have seen groups of country people straggling along, 
 with their heads thrown back and their eyes straining aloft in 
 eager quest of that sign, although perhaps their purchases 
 would only amount to a few yards of ribbon or a paper of 
 pins ! 
 
 No one can predict what the Church — otherwise Brigham— 
 will do, if money should chance to tempt him. In this case, 
 the parent Cooperative store turned, as I might say, traitor to 
 the Ward-stores — its own children — for no sooner had they 
 all been established, and had bought up all the old stock from 
 the parent store, than it was whispered abroad that the latter 
 was about to open in the retail line with a splendid stock of 
 new goods — to suit the Gentiles, of course ; for the Saints 
 were not allowed to trade outside of their own Ward-stores, 
 where they were expected to buy up all the old goods. In 
 fact, in order to gain Gentile trade and fill the pockets of Brig- 
 ham and the leading Elders who really constituted the Institu- 
 tion (and do so still), the same prices were asked at the parent 
 store as had been charged the poor, confiding stock-holders of 
 the Ward-stores at wholesale. This, of course, caused great 
 dissatisfaction, and many of the Saints rebelled, declaring they 
 would go where they pleased to spend their monty, when they 
 had any to spend. The Ward-stores, in consequence, wei-e 
 obliged, at great loss, to lower their prices, and many were 
 utterly ruined. Others which had more capital tided over the 
 difficulty, and learned a lesson concerning the honesty of the 
 Church leaders which it is to be hoped did them good 
 
THE " ORDER OF ENOCH." goj 
 
 As an example of the way in which matters were managed, 
 I may instance a very old and infirm woman who was one of 
 their victims. She came to me one day and said, "Sister 
 Stenhouse, will you buy put my stock in the Cooperative store? 
 Qur store has failed, and I have my twenty-five dollars' worth 
 in my basket. I pitied her and asked her to let me see her 
 stock, and thereupon she brought but a pound and a half of 
 nails! I did buy out her stock, for I thought that the nails 
 might be handy to have in the house, although I did not give 
 her twenty-five dollars^for them. Another person — a French- 
 man, whom I knew — bought a share, and when he saw certain 
 ruin looming over his Ward-store, he wenttto the headquarters 
 and ^purchased twenty-five dollars' worth of goods, and having 
 got them all secured, laid down his shareholders' receipt in 
 payment and beat a hasty retreat. He was a fortunate man 
 and acted prudently, but Alas ! for the poor souls who ven- 
 tured all their little savings in these Church "Institutions" and 
 then were' left to poverty and starvation. 
 
 The "Order of Enoch'' is the crowning swindle of all. Its 
 victims, under a legal form, make over to the Church every 
 cent of which they may be possessed, even to the very clothes 
 upon their backs, and place themselves — their whole life and 
 being — ^^entirely at the command of "The Church." They do, 
 in fact, literally make themselves slaves, only their slavery is 
 infinitely worse and more debasing than the bondage of the 
 Negro, for they give soul and rnind, as well as body and goods. 
 Utterly, absolutely, and for ever, into the iron grasp of the 
 Mormon Priesthood. This "Order of Enoch" is quite a favor- 
 ite institution with Brigham Young, who has lately been 
 preaching it up throughout Utah ; and many hundred fanatical 
 and deluded Saints have at his instigation given — not sold, for 
 they receive nothing in return — themselves into this abject 
 slavery. And yet these are the institutions which "unpreju- 
 diced" newspaper reporters and editors, when they visit Utah, 
 and are, according to the fixed and ordinary custom of 
 Brigham, treated and toadied to until, poor dupes, they think 
 that the favors they receive are simply marks of the appre- 
 
i6o6 GEftlNG UP I^BIES' PETITIONS. 
 
 ciation of the Mormons for their own conceited or deluded 
 selves personally, and not part and parcel of his system: — 
 these^ I Say, are the mstitutions which such- visitors laud to 
 the skies when they speak of the Prophet's generosity, his 
 open-heartedness, his patriarchal benevolence, and his other 
 saintly virtues. 
 
 When we left the Church, these institutions were attracting 
 a good deal of attention among the Saints. The " Coopera- 
 tive" still flourishes, and the "Order of Enoch" has within the 
 last few weeks been gathering into its net, not tens, but 
 hundreds of dupes. 
 
 About this time, also, it was that the Mormon women, under 
 the auspices of Eliza R. Snow and the Female Relief Society, 
 got up that petition to Mrs. Grant, to which I have referred 
 in another place, begging her to use her influence with the 
 President in favor of a toleration of Polygamy. The names 
 to that petition were affixed without any reference to propriety 
 or right. Hundreds of names were copied from the books of 
 the Society without any permission being obtained, or even 
 asked, of their owners. It was then, as I before Stated, that 
 the names of the dead were actually added as subscribers tO' 
 the petition, and in one case, when a lady mentioned that her 
 dead daughter had never belonged to the Church, as she died 
 before her mother heard of Mormonism, she was told that her 
 daughter would now, of course, have found out that Poly^my 
 was the true order of domestic life in heaven, and that she 
 would certainly be willing to subscribe if she could return to 
 earth. Her name was,, therefore, added without any further 
 ceremony, although she had been dead a good many years. 
 
 In January, 1872, a counter-petition was got up by the 
 Gentile and Apostate ladies. It set forth the cruel bondage 
 which Polygamy inflicts upon women ; spoke of the heartless 
 conduct of the Mormon leaders, and of the murders and other 
 foul crimes which had been committed by them or at their 
 instigation; showed that, should Utah become a State, under 
 the name of Deseret,— which has ever been the ambition of 
 Brighara Young, — there would be no protection for life or 
 
THE MARRIAGE OF CHILDREN LEGALISED ! 6o7' 
 
 property ; stated that the authorities themselves had declared 
 that when statehood was conferred, Gentiles and Apostates 
 would have good cause to tremble; and, finally, prayed the 
 National Government to stretch forth its long arm of power 
 for the defence and protection of honest and law-abiding citi- 
 zens. This petition was signed by four hundred and forty 
 ladies of Utah, most of them members of the Mormon Church, 
 whose real names were all fairly and openly affixed by their 
 own selves. It was presented to the Senate by the Hon. 
 Schuyler Colfax — then Vice-President; was read, discussed, 
 and ordered to be printed. As might be supposed, it excited 
 a great deal of angry discussion on the part of the Chiu"ch 
 authorities ; and the following Sundays the names of those 
 who had signed were read out in the Tabernacle, and strong 
 remarks made upon their conduct, in order to intimidate them 
 and prevent others from following their example. The conse- 
 quence was that many of their husbands and sons were 
 threatened with loss of employment, and they were thus 
 forced to retract. 
 
 That same year, a bill was brought into the Territorial 
 I(,egislature, providing that boys of fifteen years of age and 
 girls of twelve might legally contract marriage, with the con- 
 sent of their parents or guardians 1 In stating this disgraceful 
 fact, I feel certain that the reader who has never lived among 
 the Saints and is not versed in Utah affairs will think that I 
 must be mistaken in what I say. It is, however, I am sorry 
 to say, only too true, and the records of the Legislature will 
 bear me witness. The fact was stated in the New York 
 Herald Qi January 27, 1872. 
 
 It will be a matter of interest to the advocates of women's 
 suffrage to learn that Brigham Young conferred the franchise 
 upon the Mormon ladies. This, at first, appears to be a very 
 liberal measure ; but let not the innocent reader be deceived 
 thereby. The opening of the mines and the great influx of 
 Gentiles, consequent Upon the completion of the Union Pacific 
 Railroad, proved very clearly to Brigham that the day might 
 come when the Gentiles would have an equality, if not a 
 
6o8 ! A WAGON-LOAD OF LADY-VOTERS ! 
 
 majority, of votes, and in that day the slavish despotism of 
 the Mormon Priesthood would be overthrown. The time, 
 certainly, was very far off, but it was wise to provide for con- 
 tingencies. So a bill was brought in conferring upon women 
 the privilege of voting. No Mormon woman would for a 
 moment ever dream of voting otherwise than she was directed 
 by her husband, and no man would think of voting except as he 
 was "counselled" by the Priesthood. Thus, a man with half 
 a dozen wives would now have half a dozen votes, and Brother 
 Brigham, instead of having only his own single vote, would 
 have nineteen for his nineteen wives, to say nothing of his 
 daughters and the whole army of spiritual wives which he might' 
 produce. I have often seen one solitary man driving into the 
 City a whole wagon-load of women of all ages and sizes — :they 
 were going to the poll, and their votes would be 07te ! It is 
 very easy to see how in this way the influence of the Priest- 
 hood has been extended, and women themselves have been 
 made the instruments for rivetting still more firmly their own 
 fetters. But it is by no means easy to see that women in 
 Utah have derived any benefit from being permitted to vote. 
 
 Voting among the Saints has always been carried on in a 
 very free and easy manner. One gentleman — an English 
 convert — not long since told me that when he had been less 
 than two months in the States, and, of course, was not natur- 
 alised, and had no rights as a citizen, he was "counselled"- by 
 the Mormon leaders to give in his vote; he did so, and, in 
 obedience to instructions received, he gave in also his wife's 
 vote and the vote of their little baby girl — an infant of only 
 a few months old — although that was before the voting of 
 women was legalised. 
 
 Others have voted two or three times, so as to make sure 
 that the Church should not lose their interest. And this very • 
 common practice of the same persons voting over and over 
 again renders all statistics given by Mormon authority utterly 
 untrustworthy. Besides which, the voting-tickets are all num- 
 bered, and the voters' names carefully registered in a book, so 
 that the Priesthood can tell at a moment's notice on which 
 
HOW THEY MADE THE MULES VOTE ! 609 
 
 side, or for whom, a man has cast his vote. In this way the 
 ballot in Utah becomes a most ridiculous farce, instead of a 
 means for obtaining unbiassed and uninfluenced elections. 
 Anxious to obtain admission into the Union as a State, it is 
 the interest of Brigham Young and the leaders to swell the 
 numbers of the population by every means in their power. 
 For this they have strained every nerve to bring over converts 
 from abroad, and with the same object — to " build up the king- 
 dom" — they have forced Polygamy upon the people. The most 
 unscrupulous measures have been resorted to, and it is even 
 said that on one occasion when a goodly show of names was 
 needed, not only were the names of the dead and of relations 
 and converts who had never been in the country at all, added 
 as subscribers to the document, but that they actually Christ- 
 ened their mules — conferring upon them the names of men, 
 and then made them vote also ! 
 
 Notwithstanding the vigilance of the Priesthood, many 
 young Mormon ladies have preferred Gentile husbands, and 
 some of them have left the Territory ; but they have been 
 invariably traduced and scandalised, and whenever the rumor 
 of misfortune occurring to any of them reached Salt Lake 
 City, it was retailed with undisgliised gratification, as a sweet 
 morsel, by the Priesthood. Some Mormon mothers, hating 
 the idea of their daughters marrying polygamists, have encour- 
 aged the addresses of Gentiles, and were only too glad to have 
 their children marry out of Mormonism. Such mothers, of 
 course, are apostate in heart, although nominally they may not 
 have left the Church. 
 
 The extravagancies of modern dress render it every year 
 more and more difficult for men of moderate means to support 
 many wives. Fashion is proving a deadly foe to Polygamy, 
 and the feminine taste for finery is in Utah helping to bring 
 about some really good practical results. There is now a 
 pleasing change noticeable in the plural marriages in Salt 
 Lake City. There are not nearly so many marriages of this 
 kind among the actual citizens as there were three or four 
 years ago. The opening of the mines and the construction of 
 
 37 
 
^lO HOW THE GIRLS REGARD POLYGAMY, 
 
 the railroad' brought so many strangers among ua that it 
 was impossible to withstand their influence. Many of our 
 young Mormon maidens have been beguiled into matrimony 
 by these wicked Gentiles, against whom Brother Brigham has 
 so often warned us ; and not only so, but many good Saints 
 have apparently come to theconclusion that though Polygamy 
 was so absolutely necessary to their own salvation, it is not by 
 any means essential to the salvation of their daughters. 
 Thus, some of them have given their daughters to the sons of 
 strangers, to become in due time mothers of a race of wicked 
 Gentiles, and if one might judge from their conversation they 
 do not appear to regret it very much. 
 
 The dislike of the women to Polygamy has increased, espe- 
 cially in Salt Lake City, although in the Settlements fanati- 
 cism is as rampant as ever, and the " Celestial " system is the 
 order of the day. Young Mormon girls are disgusted when 
 "they hear young men and even boys talking of their " privil- 
 eges," boasting how many wives they mean to take, and how 
 they will take two on the same day in order to preserve peace. 
 Girls of the sHghtest feeling or intelligence resent all this and 
 the more refined regard these little would-be Polygamists, and 
 all they say, with intense loathing and contempt. To Gentile 
 girls such insults are of course, unknown, and the Mormon 
 girls, when they have the opportunity of mixing with the 
 outside world, are not slow to discover that while, if they 
 marry among people of their own faith, they will never occupy 
 their proper position in society, if they become Gentile wives 
 they will be the cherished companions and equals of the men 
 to whom they are united. Sensitive girls will say that they 
 would rather have a little less glory in the world to come and 
 have a little more comfort in this. 
 
 Then, too, the marrifed women compare the condition of the 
 Gentile wives with their own, and the cornparison is by no 
 means in favor of Polygamy. A polygamic wife who is one 
 of many and only sees her husband occasionally, and that as 
 a favor, cannot well visit a Gentile wife in her own home 
 without drawing a comparison by no means in favotof Mor- 
 
BROTHER BRIGHAM's APOSTATE SON. 6ll 
 
 monism. Many Mormon wives have thus become unhappy ; 
 and hence the most strenuous exertions are made on the part 
 of the leaders to prevent as far as possible all intercourse 
 between the Saints and the outside world. Nbtwithstanding 
 this, a leading' attorney in Salt Lake City told me, that during 
 the year succeeding our abandonment of Mormonism, more 
 than one hundred first wives called upon him proposing to 
 enter suit for divorce and alimony, and this represents but a 
 small proportion of those who would sacrifice almost anything 
 if only they could escape from Polygamy. 
 
 Left to itself, Mormonism would long ago haVe perished, so 
 great has been the number of Apostates. But England and 
 Sean'dinavia furnish yearly a multitude of dupes, who come 
 over every summer by thousands to aid in carrying on the 
 imposture. These, with the people in the Settlements, who 
 are purposely, kept in ignorance, slavery, and poverty, perpet- 
 uate Polygamy in Utah. 
 
 John W. Young, the Prophet's son, to whom I have already 
 alluded, became disgusted with Polygamy and abandoned it. 
 Therefore, according to his father's teaching, he cannot now 
 enter into the " Celestial Kingdom." But Brigham Young 
 says that he, as the successor of Joseph Smith, holds the 
 " Keys of the Kingdom," and he probably thinks that he will 
 be able to shuffle his son John W. in, in a quiet way. For: 
 my own part I do not suppose that Brigham Young believes 
 one word of the nonsense he teaches to the people — he is far 
 too shrewd for that ! A certain Utah official once said to my 
 hasband, " Brigham has got the best thing in America, and 
 he means to hold on to it." That is about the sum and sub- 
 stance of Brigham's religion. 
 
 About eight years ago, John W. — ^who is a handsome, 
 gentlemanly young man — married a Miss Lucy Canfield, of 
 Ogden — it was said, in obedience to the " counsel " of his 
 father. Two years subsequently he married Miss Clara 
 Jones, whose father when living had occupied a prominent' 
 position in the Church. This lady also, it was stated, he 
 married in obedience to a command of the Prophet, who had 
 
6X2 MEETING HIS "AFFINITY." 
 
 been known to say that he wished one of his sons to marry 
 her and that, if they did not, he would marry her himself. 
 Brigham has often told men to marry certain women, and they 
 have felt bound to obey, believing, probably, as Mormon men 
 generally do, that it makes very little difference, after all, who 
 they married, as they have got to have a certain number of 
 wives in order to enter the " Celestial Kingdom," and among 
 them all they will be sure to find one whom they can love. 
 Mormon men are not very different from other men ; for 
 although they tell their numerous wives quite another story, 
 they can truly love but one woman at a time. Some good 
 Saints, I doubt not, do really believe to the contrary, but love 
 thus divided is not worthy of the name. In this respect men 
 resemble women, — no woman can love two men at the same 
 time. 
 
 The -two young girls, the wives of John W. Young, of 
 course, each in turn, believed that she was the beloved one ; 
 but subsequently they discovered how greatly they had been 
 mistaken, for John W. had not yet met with his " affinity." 
 In the course of time, however, the fair one appeared who was 
 to enslave his heart, arid John W. submitted without a 
 murmur. 
 
 Mrs. Lucy Canfield Young, the first wife, had cousins living 
 in Philadelphia, and as John W. was returning from England, 
 where he had been on mission, at the request of his wife he 
 called to see them, and there he met with his fate in the 
 person of Miss Lizzie Canfield — one of his wife's cousins. He 
 immediately fell deeply in love with this young lady and 
 requested her to go with him to Salt Lake City to visit his 
 wife. She agreed, and, with her sister, accompanied him, and 
 before they arrived at the termination of their journey she 
 had promised to marry him. She had no faith in Mormonism, 
 but every thing was forgotten in love. 
 
 After their marriage. Miss Canfield — now Mrs. John W. 
 Young, number three — became very unhappy, for she felt 
 dfeeply her degraded position, and though she dearly loved her 
 busband, would have left "him had she not felt that such a step 
 
THE prophet's NEPOTISM. 613 
 
 would render him perfectly miserable, for it was evident that 
 he cared nothing at all for his other two wives. They, poor 
 girls, were also destined to become victims to this disgraceful 
 system — abandoned in their youth, and one of them the 
 mother of two or three children. 
 
 , The first wife — Lucy Canfield Young — perceiving that her 
 husband no longer cared for her, with true womanly dignity 
 withdrew from his husbandly care, obtained a divorce, and 
 became "Miss" Lucy Canfield again. 
 
 Mrs. Clara Jones JToung could not so easily bring her mind 
 to leave the father of her children, but still hopes that her 
 truant husband will return to his unhappy wife, from whom 
 he has not yet been divorced, although he no longer lives 
 with her. In this, however, she is mistaken ; — John W. will 
 never return to her, for he is completely disgusted with his 
 father's pet scheme of " Celestial " marriage, and, undoubtedly, 
 would be formally separated from his second wife, were it not 
 that, according to Mormon law, the wife alone has the privi- 
 lege of applying for a divorce. He is, in fact, at heart a " vile 
 Apostate," as his father calls seceders from the Church ; for 
 no one can possibly be a good Mormon without believing with 
 ■all his soul in Polygamy. Take Polygamy and the Endow- 
 ments from Mormon ism, and there is nothing left to distin- 
 guish that faith from any other of the absurd religions which 
 have from time to time been advocated by fanatical men. 
 
 John W. Young, notwithstanding the apostate spirit which 
 has fallen upon him, has lately been appointed to preside over 
 the Saints at St. George, in Southern Utah, and I sincerely 
 trust that he will lead all those good Saints, over whom he is 
 sent to preside, to think as he does respecting plural marriage, 
 and that his wife may do her best to create in the minds of 
 the unhappy and degraded sisters around her a desire for that 
 higher social position, that perfect equality with man, which 
 is the inalienable right of every woman. 
 
 It is very fortunate for John W. Young that he is the son 
 of his father ; for if he had been any other man's son, and 
 had abandoned Polygamy, he would never have been appointed 
 
6l4 BRIGHAM THE PRINCE OF APOSTATES ! 
 
 to preside over the Saints in St. jGeorge, or anywhere else. 
 But Brigham is aU-powerful in MprTOondom ; it is he who 
 controls the affairs of the "Kingdoni"; and if he chooses to 
 allow an Apostate son not only to .pass muster hu,t to be 
 accounted worthy to rule among the Saints, who shall gainsay 
 it ? Brigham has a bitter hatred of Apostates and apostacy. 
 The very name — " Apostate " — is the most cruel arrow in his 
 quiver. And yet the very man, who if Brigham's own precedent 
 were followed, ought to succeed him — Orson Hyde, the 
 President of the Twelve Apostles, was once an Apostate, in 
 Missouri, and a very cowardly one at that. Brigham himselif, 
 ■iittle ^s he perhaps imagines it, is the Prince of Apostates. 
 He becam"2 an Apostate Methodist when he left Methodism 
 and joiped the Mormons, and certainly he is now an. Apostate 
 from Mormonism as Joseph Smith first taught it. The change 
 from Methodism to Mormonism, as it was first presented to 
 the world, was nothing near so great as the departure which 
 Brigha,m has made from the original faith of the Saints. 
 There have been many Apostates from the teachings' of 
 Joseph in early days, but, of all Apostates, Brother Brigham is 
 the chief. 
 
 It may, perhaps, surprise the reader to learn that in poly- 
 gamous Ut?ih, notwithstanding the constant importation of 
 young girls from abroad, there are two thousand and fifty-six 
 more males than females. In four counties only are the 
 females in excess of the males. In Salt Lake County, which 
 includes Salt Lake City, there are two hundred and ninety- 
 nine more females than males ; in Cache County there are 
 ninety-three more ; in Iron County there are thirty-one ; and 
 in San Pete there are two hundred and thirty-eight more 
 ifemales than males. In all the other seventeen counties, the 
 males are in excess of the females. In many instances the 
 sexes are singularly balanced ; as, for instance, in Washington 
 County, where there are fifteen hundred and thirty-two males 
 and exactly the same number of females. Weber County has . 
 an excess of three hundred and thirty-six wajes ; Piute has 
 SHtty-nme males to thirteen fein^J^^. and in Sevier County 
 
FACTS AM1> FIGURES EXTRAORDINARY. 6lS 
 
 tfeere are nineteen Unfortunate males Who are not blessed with 
 the presence of a single female ! These figures I obtained 
 from the Census Bureau at Washington-. They speak for 
 themselves, and clearly demonstrate that, as far as Utah is 
 concerned, instead of Polygamy being a necessity on account 
 of the preponderance of the female sex, the facts are exactly 
 the reverse ; and if some men have two, four, six, eight or ten 
 wives, for every wife they take some othei' man is forced to 
 remain single. Considering the multiplicity of wives among 
 the more pioiis Saints, aiid the large number of miners who, 
 of course, are either unmarried or have not brought their 
 wives with them to Utah, it is quitfe evident that there must 
 be a good many single men in Utah. 
 
 •But before closing my narrative, I must add a few words 
 relative to myself. After my husband had been in New York 
 for some months, it became necessary on account of business 
 that I should join him there. I did so, and found him busy 
 upon a history of Mormonism which he had for Some years 
 contemplated wiriting, and for which he had collected a large 
 amount of valuable facts and statistics from the Historian's 
 Office in Salt Lake City. While still a Mormon he had pro- 
 posed to vindicate the Saiints and justify their leaders, but 
 now that his eyes were open to the degrading superstition and 
 cruel bondage of the system, he was determined, as far as he 
 had ability to do so, to expose the corruption and tyranny of 
 the Priesthood. I heartily coincided with him, and encouraged 
 him with wifely commendations. 
 
 At that time, I had no idea of becoming myself an author, 
 and it was not until the close of that same year, ^hen I paid a 
 second visit to New York, that I first seriously entertained the 
 idea of appearing before the public. I was induced to write a 
 little volume which I thought would expose some of the cruel 
 wrongs which Mormon Polygamy inflicts upon deluded, help: 
 less women. My work was very kindly received and exten» 
 sively circulated!, but it was, I must cowfeSs, only a very 
 imperfect and brief sketch* In this present volume I have 
 endeavored to supply the defieiencies of the former, and- in a 
 
6l6 UNDOING THE PAST, 
 
 truthful, if imperfect, sketch of my own life and my own ex- 
 perience in, and observations of, the workings of the polyga- 
 mic system, I have endeavored to give my readers a just idea 
 of what Polygamy and Mormonism really are. 
 
 With the exception of the little literary efforts which I have 
 made from time to time to expose through the press the iniquity 
 of the " Celestial Order of Marriage/' no event of more than per- 
 sonal and private interest has, since I left the Mormon Church, 
 interrupted the even tenor of my life. Last year, however, I 
 was able to deal another blow — weak, it might be, but still it 
 was a blow — directed at that false system against which I have 
 sworn eternal enmity. I lectured upon Mormon Polygamy, in 
 Washington, and Boston, and other large cities, and attempted 
 in my humble way to attract the attention of the Gentile 
 world to the iniquities of that terrible superstition which, in 
 Utah, has degraded womanhood and wrecked the happiness of 
 thousands of my deluded sisters. I met with sympathy every- 
 where, and then, as now, I resolved that efforts like these I 
 wolild never relax until, if God spared my life, I should see 
 the last stone in the fabric of Mormonism overturned and Mor- 
 mon Polygamy counted among the sins and follies of the past 
 
 His literary work accomplished, my husband returned to 
 Salt Lake City. Looking back over the past, our Missionary 
 life and our faith in Brighamism seems like a dream, so diffi- 
 cult is it for us to realise that we ever submitted our souls to 
 the slavery of the Priesthood or placed any credence in that 
 mass of folly, superstition, and licentiousness, known as Mor- 
 monism. During all his efforts to obey counsel and build up 
 a " kingdom," my husband, I know, never ceased to love me. 
 For the misery which he then, in — as I firmly believe — his 
 conscientious endeavors to live his religion, inflicted upon me, 
 I have long ago freely and fully forgiven him. I think that 
 during all that time he never ceased to entertain the fondest 
 affection for me ; and, if he was foolishly confiding in those 
 who he believed were divinely authorised and speaking by in- 
 spiration, can I blame him when I remember that I myself 
 was actuated by the same faith? 
 
THE serpent's TRAIL. 617 
 
 It was impossible to obliterate utterly the education and in- 
 fluences of a whole life's experience. That wall of partition — 
 Polygamy — which separated my husband from me for so many 
 years, is now for ever broken down. But the effects of Mor- 
 monism will, no doubt, though unconsciously to ourselves, 
 tinge the whole of our future life. We can never forget the 
 past. The mournful sympathy which, according to the poet, 
 the Peri at the gate of Paradise expressed over the sins and sor- 
 rows of humanity, might, with a slight variation, be applied to 
 
 our own lives : — 
 
 * 
 
 " Poor race of men, said the pitying spirit. 
 
 Dearly ye pay for your primal fall ; 
 Some traces of Eden ye still inherit, 
 
 But the trail of the serpent is over them all." 
 
 The terrible effects of our religion will, I know, follow us to 
 our graves ; but that temporary alienation has, I think, like 
 the quarrels of lovers, only made us still dearer to each other ; 
 and now, happy in our family circle, and with our children 
 growing up around us, untainted by the fearful superstition 
 which embittered and wasted their parents' lives, we feel that 
 in them is our greatest blessing, and thank God that we have 
 lived to see the day when our greatest ambition is, by every 
 effort which lies within our reach, to aid in undoing that work 
 which we spent the best years of our life in endeavoring to 
 perform. 
 
L' ENVOI. 
 
 In the preceding pages I have endeavored to present to the 
 reader the story of my life's experience in Mormonism and 
 Polygamy, and to place before him a truthful picture of the 
 doctrines and practices of the Saints. 
 
 Much has already been written on this subject — much that 
 is in accordance with facts, and much that is exaggerated and 
 false. Hitherto, with but one exception* — that of a lady who 
 wrote very many years ago, and who in her writings, so mixed 
 up fiction with what was true, that it was difficult to determine 
 where the one ended and the other began — no woman who 
 really was a Mormon and lived in Polygamy ever wrote the 
 history of her own personal experience. Books hive been 
 published, and narratives have appeared in the magazines and 
 journals, purporting to be written by Mormon wives ; it is, 
 however, perhaps, unnecessary for me to state that, notwith- 
 standing such narratives may be imposed upon the Gentile 
 world as genuine, that they were written by persons outside 
 the Mormon faith would in a moment be detected by any in- 
 telligent Saint who took the trouble to peruse them. 
 
 Two objects influenced my mind when I first proposed to 
 write this volume. In the first place, I earnestly desired to 
 stil- up my Mormon sisters to a just sense of their own posi- 
 tion. I longed to make them feel, as I do, the cruel degrada- 
 
 *Mrs. Ettie V. Smitli. 
 
RIGHTS AND DUTIES OF WOMANHOOD. €19 
 
 tion, the humiliating tyranny, which Polygamy inflicts. I 
 wanted to arouse them to a sense of their own Womanhood, 
 -and a just appreciation of those Rights and Duties which, as 
 women, God has conferred upon them. I was anxious that 
 they should Understand and know the inconsistency and folly 
 of that superstitious faith by which they have been so egregi- 
 ously deluded ; that they might learn to hate and loathe the 
 falsely-named " Celestial " system of marriage ; and rising in 
 honest indignation and disgust against the tyranny of the op- 
 pressor, break asui^er the yoke of bondage, cast from them 
 for ever the moral, religious, and social fetters wherewith they 
 are bound, and, walking in the light of truth, assert their per- 
 fect 'equaUty with their sons, their husbands, their fathers, and 
 their brethren, and henceforth claim and occupy that position 
 which God assigned them, and which by right is theirs ! 
 
 In the second place, I was anxious to enlist for them the 
 sympathy of the Gentile world. Most strenuous efforts have 
 been made, large sums of money have been spent, and secret 
 intrigues, as well as open and honorable negotiations, have 
 been carried on for the purpose of obtaining admission for 
 Utah into the Union, under the title of The State of 
 JPeseret. The name " Deseret " itself is taken from the Book 
 of Mormon, and is said to signify in the celestial tongue a 
 honey-bee ; wherefore it is that the escutcheon of Utah Terri- 
 tory is a bee-hive ; and to grant that name " Deseret " alone 
 would be a concession to Mormon superstition. Out here in 
 the Valley of the Great Salt Lake we are perfectly well aware 
 that, with Utah once admitted as a State, it would be almost 
 impossible for Gentiles to live peaceably and safely among the 
 Mormons ; and of this fact their leading men and their official 
 organs have repeatedly boasted. With Utah as a State, and 
 Brigham Young once more Governor, the enslavement of the 
 people to the Priesthood would be complete, and the cruel 
 bondage of Polygamy would be rivetted a thousand times 
 more firmly ypon the unfortunato women. I was anxious, 
 therefore, to attract the attention of Congress and the Nation 
 at large to these facts ; that thus, when Mormon bills and 
 
620 THE RESUMS OF MY LIFE. 
 
 Mormon petitions, replete with falsified statistics, and perver- 
 ted, and — in many instances — utterly untrue, statements, are 
 presented to the National Legislature, neither the representa- 
 tives of the Nation nor the Nation itself may be deceived 
 thereby. These were the two objects which I proposed to 
 myself in writing my own experience as a wife and mother 
 among the Mormons, and I trust to some extent at least I have 
 realised them. 
 
 I have told my story simply, but truthfully, and, as far as was 
 possible, I have endeavored to Tell it All. Some facts I have 
 had occasion to relate, so horrible and repulsive, that a person 
 unused to Mormonism and unversed in Mormon doctrine and 
 Mormon practice would find dificulty in giving credence to 
 such things — and yet, Alas! they are all too true! It is only 
 right that I should add, that in the conduct and publicly ex- 
 pressed opinions of Brigham Young and many of the leaders, 
 there have been such disgusting atrocities and such impure 
 statements that for the sake of decency and propriety I dared 
 not even mention them. For this suppressio vert I feel 
 assured the reader will not blame me. In all that I have said 
 I have most scrupulously kept to the very letter of the truth — 
 I have neither exaggerated nor concealed, and in every respect 
 my great endeavor has bfeen to act with the strictest impar- 
 tiality and justice. 
 
 Mine, in one sense, is the story of a wasted life. From the 
 day when I linked my destiny with that of a Mormon Mis- 
 sioHiiry Elder, to the time when, after long weary years of 
 trial and endurance, I abjured the faith of the modern Saints, 
 I suffered a constant martyrdom. Poverty, self-denial,, arid 
 suffering, I gloried in, when I believed myself the humble in- 
 strument in the hands of the Almighty for proclaiming the 
 " Fulness o' the Gospel" to those who were walking in the dark- 
 ness of unbelief. The trials of a Missionary life were to me 
 a pleasure. I bore with gladness the cross, believing that 
 hereafter I should exchange it for the glories of an eternal 
 crown ; and I think, even now, I should never have wearied of 
 that life of devotion, so great was my faith in my religion, had 
 
THE RECORD OF MY OWN EXPERIENCE. 621 
 
 the leaders of the Church remained steadfast to that simple 
 Gospel creed which we were at first taught was the Evangel 
 of the Latter-Day Dispensation. But when Polygamy — that 
 accursed thing ! that offspring of deceit and licentiousness ! — 
 came across our path, darkening the way and blighting the 
 affections, the hopes, the whole life, of every true woman 
 among the Saints ; when Polygamy came, casting its foul stain 
 over all that was holy, crushing out from our hearts all that 
 was good, and pure, and heaven-born, degrading our woman- 
 hood and embittering existence itself ; when its dark shadow, 
 like the gloom of the deadly Upas, brought death of the soul 
 and the withering of the heart's true love to all who came 
 within its influence ; — then my faith began to waver, my zeal 
 to wax cold, and in anticipation, and subsequently in realisa- 
 tion, of the cruel wrong which that system could inflict upon 
 the affections and life of a wife and mother, I endured daily a 
 trial of my faith — a moral and spiritual martyrdom, such as I 
 trust my readers may never experience. 
 
 Not a day passed but what more and more evidence of the 
 wickedness of the system, and its cruel debasement of woman's 
 nature, was brought beneath my observation. Whatever came 
 in contact with it, whoever fell beneath its influence, was the 
 subject of immediate loss ; — men, women, and children alike 
 suffered from its effects. The innocence of childhood was 
 sullied by its contamination ; girlhood and youth were 
 degraded and disgraced ; the fair, sweet dreams of virgin 
 purity were marred by its presence ; the ideal of love — pure, 
 faithful, holy, heavenly, which God himself has implanted in 
 the heart, was rudely trampled upon, and perverted, and 
 destroyed ; the lives of wives and mothers were but the 
 record of outrage, cruelty, and wrong, or else the deadening 
 and blasting of every holy impulse and every tender emotion ; 
 while men themselves were brutalised and debased ; — the 
 husband became the lord, and frequently the tyrant and the 
 despot ; and the wife was either the toy of the hour, or the 
 drudge who looked after the children — but never the cherished 
 companion, the help-meet of the man. Such was the influ- 
 
622 THE TELL-TALE WITNESS TO THE T&tTTH. • 
 
 ence of Polygainy — such the resmltrs of the "Celestial Order 
 of Marriage ! " 
 
 Contrary to the laws of the land ; contsrary to the holiest 
 sentiments of the heart ; contrary to the divine teachings of 
 Heaven, that system still 'exists ! It is a disgrace to the 
 National Government ; it is a reproach to Civilisation ; it is a 
 blot upon the fair escutcheon of the World's Greatest 
 Republic ! 
 
 And yet visitors will come from Utah, and will tell you that 
 the Mormon women are happy in Polygamy, for it is a part 
 of their religion. Never; until new hearts and new natures 
 are given to the women of Utah, and all that is womanly, and 
 pure, and sacred, is crushed out from their souls, can one 
 single woman be truly happy in Polygamy ! They may say 
 so publicly, they may, for their religion's sake, tM strangers 
 that thus it is ; but listen to them when they are alone among 
 themselves ; read, if you can, their hearts, and mark the 
 bitterness which they try to stifle there ; nay, see upon their 
 very features the handwriting which bears witness against 
 their assertion that they are happy and which proclaims to 
 the world the sorrow which they vainly try to hide ! 
 
 I send forth this little book with many earnest prayers and 
 many heartfelt aspirations that my Mormon sisters maj^be 
 benefitted thereby. Out of the evil which man originates, 
 God alone can produce good; and I trust that my feeble 
 attempt to portray the cruel wrong which Polygamy inflicts 
 upon the Women of Utah may excite the sympathy of every 
 man and woman whose influence may avail to hasten that 
 time when this relic of ancient barbarism may be utterly 
 rooted out before the advancing civilisation of the age. 
 
 The night — the gloomy night of stiperstition — cannot last 
 for ever. Already there are signs of the coming dawn. The 
 time, I trust and pray, will not long be delayed when the veil 
 shall be removed from the eyes of the enslaved men and 
 women of our modern Zion, and th«y shall cast aside for ever 
 the yoke of the Priesthood. I trust that I shall yet live to see 
 the day when the Mormon wives and mothers shall awak« to 
 
V ENVOI. 623 
 
 a sense of their position and responsibilities, shall understand 
 that God never required that their womanhood should be 
 degraded, their love crushed out, and the holiest instincts of 
 their nature perverted; I trust to see them assert their 
 inalienable rights — their womanly prerogatives — their very 
 birthright itself ; I trust to see them shake off the slavery of 
 that cruel superstition which has so long held them captive ; 
 I trust to see them take their places side by side with Gentile 
 matrons — the honored wives and mothers of the men of 
 Utah ; I trust to see that dark shadow banished from their 
 features, banished from their hearts, banished from their lives, 
 — I trust to see them Free ! 
 
 Full of love for them — my sisters, my friends, the compan- 
 ions of my life hitherto, whose religion was once my own, 
 whose hopes and joys I have shared, whose sorrows and trials 
 have been also mine' — with hopeful prayer I lay down 
 my pen and present my labors to the world. And if my 
 humble efforts shall have conduced, even in the smallest 
 degree, to keep one sister from entering into this sinful 
 " Order " ; if they shall have aroused the Women of Utah to 
 investigate the foundations of their faith, to calmly and 
 impartially consider the iniquities of the system of Polygamy, 
 to renounce the man-made slavery of the " Celestial Order " ; 
 if I shall be found to have awakened in the minds of thinking 
 men and wo;nen a hatred for the licentious doctrine which 
 enslaves the wives and daughters of the Saints ; if I have to 
 any extent enlisted active, practical sympathy in their behalf — 
 I shall feel that my endeavors have been abundantly rewarded 
 and that my labors have not been bestowed in vain.