THE: INSCiillABLE WOMAN" 
 
 eSWard da i^/d baron 
 
 — .■^■^' — — ~- 
 
CORNELL 
 
 UNIVERSITY 
 
 LIBRARY 
 
Cornell University Library 
 PS 3503.A7446Z5 
 
 The inscrutable woman an autobiography 
 
 3 1924 022 245 405 
 
Cornell University 
 Library 
 
 The original of tliis book is in 
 tine Cornell University Library. 
 
 There are no known copyright restrictions in 
 the United States on the use of the text. 
 
 http://www.archive.org/details/cu31924022245405 
 
The Inscrutable 
 Woman 
 
 AN AUTOBIOGRAPHY 
 1896-1910 
 
 BY 
 
 Edward David Baron 
 
 BROADWAY PUBLISHING COMPANY 
 835 BROADWAY, NEW YORK 
 
 branches: BALTIMORE,' ATLANTA, FLORENCE, ALA. 
 
Copyright, 1910, 
 
 by 
 
 Edward David Baron. 
 
 3?7^/V,^S 
 
CONTENTS 
 
 chapter page 
 
 Introduction 5 
 
 I. "Woman's Lie" iS 
 
 II. Cupid Gets Re-enforcement .... 45 
 
 III. Cupid's "Not Guilty" Unavailing 107 
 
 IV. Some Adventures in the Old 
 
 World 159 
 
 V. The Four Perjurers 171 
 
 VI. "Business is Business" 196 
 
 VII. "The Better Part of Truth" . . . 225 
 
 VIII. "My Name is Legion; Because 
 
 we are Many" 279 
 
INTRODUCTION. 
 
 Very rare, indeed, have been the occasions on 
 which I have spoken to anyone during the last 
 three years. This sounds Hke fiction, neverthe- 
 less, it is not. No foptune has been taken here, 
 a hero there, and tied together to tickle the 
 fancy of the reader or thrill him with shocks 
 of tragedy. Every part of it is true. Every care 
 has been taken neither to add to, nor subtract 
 from, what has actually happened.* 
 
 The almighty dollar, in the hand of an ig- 
 norant, immoral and unscrupulous woman, is 
 liable to work shocking deeds. Such a woman 
 I had the misfortune to meet about six years 
 ago. Since my sister's advent to this country — 
 June, 1909 — I have begun to doubt if there are 
 any truthful women in the world at all. I found 
 the latter to be as unscrupulous in telling the 
 truth as any other woman. We have in history 
 
 *I have substituted Martian for my nationality, in 
 order to preclude vitiation of judgment on the part of 
 the reader, incident to national bias. The best of us 
 still says, "Out of Galilee ariseth no prophet," and 
 omitted the names of two towns, the one where the 
 Inscrutable Woman lives, and the other where I went 
 immediately after I left the first one; also the name 
 of a librarian and a few residential numbers in the 
 City of New York. 
 
 6 
 
the record of men who have been truthful un- 
 der the most tempting and adverse circum- 
 stances, but of women, so far as I know, we 
 have none. 
 
 But this woman proved herself to be the 
 greatest bar that I had ever seen or heard of. 
 She surrounded me with an atmosphere of false- 
 hood for six years, played thousands of roguish 
 tricks upon me, repeatedly attempted to rob me 
 of all my savings, (in which she failed with the 
 exception of $200), hired tramps who threat- 
 ened "to smash my jaws if I did not get out of 
 the country," sent a host of women of the street 
 to the house where I had been rooming in order 
 to entice and entrap me ; in short, she left no 
 crime uncommitted short of murder, and this lit- 
 tle by little — she had been torturing me to death, 
 "Woman's characteristic way of murdering her 
 victim." 
 
 She never denied her authorship to these dev- 
 iltries and crimes, but she considered them a 
 means to a good end, and so still she does. 
 Thus, she has, all this while, been diligently en- 
 gaged in paving hell with good intentions. She 
 earnestly believes that her lies are the better 
 parts of truths. From her behavior it may easily 
 be inferred that she also believes license to be 
 the better part of matrimony, and deviltry the 
 better part of wisdom. 
 
 She sent me a book, a novel, which says that, 
 sometimes "a he is the better part of truth." 
 She sent me a second book; this was only a 
 challenge implying that if I still considered such 
 authority inadequate to convince me, I was at 
 liberty to present or expose her lies and devil- 
 c 
 
tries to the world and see if they are so or not. 
 The author of the second book — Upton Sinclair 
 — had done something, not exactly alike, yet 
 very similar to what she wished; he had paved 
 the way for me; I could follow his example. 
 
 To write a book was, for me, one of the most 
 difficult things in the world to achieve; but I 
 did not consider it an impossibility. My means 
 were limited, yet I reckoned I could devote two 
 years to the study of the English language, and 
 six months to the writing of the book, and so 
 did I resolve to do. This I said to others when 
 asked, and so she soon heard of it, but it only 
 provided her with another object for ridicule. 
 She laughed at the idea more heartily than 
 she had ever done in her life. For me to 
 write a book, from her point of view, was 
 an impossibility; I was only making a fool of 
 myself. But I paid no attention to her. I went 
 on with my studies for about twenty months, un- 
 til, compelled by some lung trouble, I discon- 
 tinued reading and commenced the writing of 
 the book, which I completed in five months, and 
 herewith I present the same to the public. 
 
 This story will not be a surprise for not less 
 than one thousand men and women who took 
 part in it, and who were of different nationali- 
 ties — Americans, Germans, Jews, Italians, Eng- 
 lishmen, Frenchmen and Martians ; and of vari- 
 ous professions — real estate and insurance men, 
 school teachers, doctors, clergymen, jewelers, 
 electricians, pianists, writers, librarians, detec- 
 tives, one policeman,* a well-known author,* 
 
 * His name and the part he played has besn omitted 
 throughout the story. 
 
 7 
 
the editor of one of the most popular maga- 
 zines,* a well-known brewer,* and a great num- 
 ber of tramps and women of the streets. She ar- 
 rayed such a large crowd under her flag against 
 me — one man — ^by. force of lying and the power 
 of the "almighty dollar." Big crimes can only 
 be concealed behind a big crowd. She kept her- 
 self, all the while, at the background, and never 
 for a minute exposed herself to my view. 
 
 Most Americans, undoubtedly, will regard 
 this story, more especially the first part of it, as 
 an oddity. They may not be able to understand 
 how in the world things could have taken such 
 a course and come to such a climax. The differ- 
 ence between this story and fiction, or even the 
 story of a man born to convention, is the dif- 
 ference of a snowflake and a piece of manufac- 
 tured ice, or an organized being and a cast or 
 carved statue. By reducing the temperature of a 
 drop of water it may be converted into ice, but 
 not to a snowflake. A man can carve a statue 
 with hammer and chisel, but he cannot make 
 with such tools an organized being. The former 
 is matter mechanically shaped, by some artifice, 
 after some pattern or design; the latter involves 
 birth, growth and development. Most of the 
 stories filling the shelves of the libraries are 
 cast in the mold of the convention. They repre- 
 sent dead matter; there is no life in them, and 
 by implication, no growth or development. 
 This story is a growth ; convention has playgd no 
 part in its formation, although it has stimulated 
 the growth and development, and has also, alas! 
 marred, here and there, the exquisite beauty' and 
 delicacy of the texture by handling it too rudely. 
 
The events narrated in this book could never 
 have happened between two Americans or two 
 individuals of any one nationality, even though, 
 it be assumed one of the parties to have been a 
 woman given to strict conventionalism, and the 
 other one, a philosopher of the opposite sex. It 
 is further necessary to assume the woman to 
 have been extremely selfish and devoid of the 
 sense of right and wrong, one who considered 
 right that which served her narrow, selfish end, 
 and wrong, what was prejudicial to her per- 
 sonal interests, plus a third quality — the habit 
 of inveterate lying. This is the kind of woman 
 whom we shall meet throughout the story. But, 
 on the other hand, had the philosopher been 
 conversant with the conventions of the country, 
 yet disregarded them in his daily life, still he 
 might have been tempted either to submit him- 
 self to her will, or, what is the more likely, to 
 deal with her after her folly or ignorance. So, 
 as a second condition with respect to the second 
 party, it becomes necessary to assume him en- 
 tirely ignorant of the conventions of the coun- 
 try; and this represents the second person to be 
 met with in the story. 
 
 I was thirteen years old when I left home — 
 father, mother, brother, sister, etc. — and have 
 been wandering since. I know the customs and 
 conventions of no country to speak of. But I 
 had learned to a certain extent, the inflexible 
 law4 of nature or the order of the universe, and 
 the principle of right and wrong, true and false, 
 for the regulation of conduct, consequent 
 thereon, and had considered any deviation to the 
 paths of propriety, practicability or pleasurable- 
 
ness, as an infringement of this principle. When 
 I came to this country I read of men and women 
 advertising for wife and husband. I thought 
 it to be a way as proper as the best one known 
 to me up to the time for entering into the bond, 
 and I still think it so. But later on I heard peo- 
 ple say, "I married for love," and they seemed 
 to be very proud of it, too. Whereupon I tried 
 to learn the meaning of "love" as it is under- 
 stood in this country. "Love" seems to be a 
 word of a very common use, but having a good 
 many meanings, sometimes opposed one to an- 
 other, it required a large number of examples, 
 given by the Americans who came in contact 
 with me for a full decade, before I could learn 
 what it means when applied to matrimony. Add 
 to this whatever help I might have derived from 
 the reading of one hundred and ten volumes 
 of books and a big pile of periodicals and maga- 
 zines. And now, after all, I think I know what 
 "marrying for love" means. It means to secure 
 a wife by brute force or abduction. 
 
 The savage of the antiquity when he fell in 
 love resorted to brute force to obtain the object 
 of his love, because he was the stronger. This 
 is still true with respect to us; man is stronger 
 than woman, as it has always been. But with 
 us, the positive law, backed by a strong govern- 
 ment, renders this brute superiority ineffective; 
 and this circumstance leaves but one alternative, 
 namely, to assail the object of his passion by 
 flattery and false promises. It is universally ad- 
 mitted that love is blind; which is to say, it has 
 not the guidance of reason, it disregards the 
 dictates of reason; or, a man in love acts as if 
 
 10 
 
he had no reason, like an animal. Abolish the 
 law and watch the result; the lover will resort 
 to brute force just like an animal or the savage 
 in order to gain his end. And conversely, if it 
 was possible to introduce into the savage com- 
 munity a government like our own with its laws 
 and regulations, marriage by force would have 
 been replaced by marriage for love. From this 
 no other inference can be drawn than, that the 
 difference between the so-called civilized man 
 of to-day and the savage of the antiquity, is 
 very much like that of a tiger in captivity and 
 one at large. The former has not been cured 
 of his brute nature or habit ; on the contrary, he 
 is still as aggressive as the latter centuries ago. 
 Society, which is man taken collectively, has 
 only caged the individual and thus made aggres- 
 sive conduct impossible for him. This is a very 
 poor progress, if any, for civilized man to have 
 made over the savage, during some sixty or more 
 centuries. It is not worth the powder wasted 
 for the celebration. Nevertheless, people are 
 very proud of it, and so enthusiastic as to 
 recommend it to others not favorably inclined 
 to it. I was expected to follow their example, 
 nay, compelled to. I refused to comply, hence 
 this book. 
 
 The question under discussion throughout the 
 book is as complicated as it is delicate ; and some 
 parts of it is liable to excite a certain offence or 
 scandal to minds trained in good moral habits. 
 To such I can only say, in the first place, that 
 I, as a novelist, by no means would have treated 
 this question. I have done so on the plea of 
 having had no control over the events, because 
 
 11 
 
they are true. I have only been the unfortun- 
 ate witness to, and suffered by them, and here- 
 with the unwiUing narrator of them, prompted 
 by duty, with a view to showing the mistaken 
 notions and perverted use which is being made 
 of the attraction existing between the two 
 sexes ; and secondly, I will simply mention the 
 answer of an American missionary in response 
 to the question — if he did not think it advisable 
 to pass over the xxxviii chapter of Genesis, put 
 to him by one of our school teachers who taught 
 the story of the Bible to a class, and having 
 commenced from the beginning of the book of 
 Genesis had arrived there. 
 
 "In that," he says, "I do not agree with you. 
 There is a good lesson for every youth to learn 
 from Onan's sin and the consequence of it. 
 There is hardly any other vice that ruins as 
 many lives, impairs health, blunts the sensibil- 
 ities, and blights the soul, and is a frequent 
 cause of idiocy and insanity. No young man 
 can afford to be ignorant of the pernicious con- 
 sequences of an unchaste life. It devolves on 
 parents and teachers to teach in due time, genital 
 hygiene, which is being neglected from motives 
 of false modesty, to all those whose instruction 
 is entrusted to them." 
 
 I, however, have treated the problem exclu- 
 sively from moral point of view, leaving the 
 hygienic treatment of it to those who are bet- 
 ter qualified. 
 
 The narrative of this work is, in reality, a 
 sketch of my life, covering a time of fourteen 
 years — 1896-1910. I had never thought of writ- 
 ing until I met the woman, after whom the 
 
 12 
 
book is entitled with one of her self-applied 
 epithets, and who gave it an entirely different 
 direction and made it so tragic as to justify me 
 to undergo all the troubles and the privations 
 which the preparation of such a work required, 
 in order to show the ferocious nature of the 
 conventions, and the kind of criminals it makes 
 of ignorant and immoral women and, no doubt 
 to a certain extent, of men. 
 
 13 
 
"And although it singes the wings of the gnats. 
 Destroys their heads and all their little brains. 
 
 Light is still light; 
 And although I am stung by the angriest wasp, 
 
 I will not let it go." 
 
 1« 
 
THE INSCRUTABLE 
 WOMAN 
 
 CHAPTER I. 
 
 "woman's lie." 
 
 "Who dares think one thing and another tell. 
 My heart detests him as the gates of hell." 
 
 It was on the nineteenth day of November, 
 1900, that I landed in New York, the greatest 
 city, the center of the wealth, the pride of the 
 New World, at a time when all the world 
 waited, with eagerness, for the swing of the gate 
 that opens but once in ten decades, to march 
 into the twentieth century, a compulsory for- 
 ward march impossible of return. 
 
 The sight of the magnificent buildings and 
 the imposing height of the skyscrapers could 
 not but invite my gaze and excite my open ad- 
 miration, as they invariably do those of every 
 alien who is welcomed to the harbor of the 
 great metropolis by the hospitable portion of 
 the population. 
 
 Wonderful! said I to myself. Matter in the 
 New World appears to possess life comparable 
 to that of the vegetable kingdom, responsive to 
 
 15 
 
1 6 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 stimulation, capacious of growth, superior in 
 degree to, and differing in kind from, the species 
 of Hfe whereby hylosoists hold all matter to be 
 animated. But if merely evincive of archi- 
 tectonic skill of the builders, why raise them to 
 such a towering height? An attempt to connect 
 their tops with the abode of the Most High and 
 thus assure safety of life from a possible del- 
 uge! How to account, then, for the failure 
 that was to be seen all over? Could the plural- 
 ity of languages give a clue to the situation? A 
 second confusion of tongues, forsooth, in the 
 New World, similar to the one which occurred 
 centuries ago in the Old World, new at the 
 time, at Babylon, the only city then in exist- 
 ence all over the --orld, and when the human 
 race was in its prime of youth according to the 
 narrative of the Scripture. A result, apparently, 
 of an angry visit by the Deity in chastisement 
 for their stubbornness, for disbelief in His prom- 
 ise, and disregard of His token displayed in the 
 heavens, expressive of the merciful covenant 
 established with Noah against destruction of 
 life by the inundation of water. Yet averse to 
 leaving the creatures of His hand thus dis- 
 mayed and confounded, moved by compassion 
 He ordered His bow, divesting it of its hues 
 and solidifying it, to descend upon the earth and 
 span the East River, uniting the two sister is- 
 lands, and thus give them a full assurance of 
 life for which they had been in vain striving. 
 
 The age of miracles seemed to me just to 
 have commenced on this side of — I will go, how- 
 ever, no further. Because the impressions of 
 
Woman's Lie 17 
 
 an ultramundane being, as I may be supposed 
 to be, may not interest, much less appeal to the 
 vanity of the Americans in general and New 
 Yorkeans in particular, to say nothing of those 
 who in sudden outburst of indignation may ..de- 
 nounce them as the whimsical ravings of some 
 superannuated eccentric ascetic upon whom 
 ruthless time has not failed to stamp its indeli- 
 ble marks of senility. I pass on, therefore, in 
 haste to the narration of my story, regardless 
 of, because irresponsible for, the consequences 
 by reason of its being a true story — yes, a love 
 story without love, though to some with love in 
 excess. 
 
 New York dailies, especially the Herald and 
 the World, soon presented to my view a strange 
 case, advertisements under the heading "Per- 
 sonal," expressive of appeals from the victims 
 of Cupid soliciting means of cure for their 
 heart's wound; nor did I wait very long before 
 a few copies of matrimonial papers found their 
 way into my room, coming from different States 
 of the Union without my asking or sending for 
 them, wherein was to be found full description 
 of both sexes — their age, complexion, accom- 
 plishments, financial standing, etc., with a view 
 to securing a life-partner. It was quite natural 
 for me to infer that the woman's position in life 
 had been raised to the level with that of the 
 man. In other words, that equality of the sexes 
 was an acknowledged fact in this land of free- 
 dom and liberty. 
 
 Simple equality of sexes, however, did not 
 seem to me quite consistent with the real state 
 
1 8 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 of affairs. Some inequality was still observable 
 which was in favor of the female element, con- 
 sidering their forward or somewhat aggressive 
 manners, the prevailing splendor of their dress 
 and ornaments far surpassing those of their 
 male partners or escorts, and their numerical 
 superiority among the pedestrians in the streets. 
 
 A little courtesy on the part of the stronger 
 toward the weaker sex may be said to account 
 for this seeming anomaly. But courtesy when 
 one-sided becomes before long, what may be 
 called, a mechanical routine, and loses its moral 
 value like habitual benevolence which soon re- 
 duces the benefactor to a debtor and the bene- 
 ficiary to a creditor of the most obnoxious kind 
 who regards charitable contributions as his 
 rightful claim and resents upon failure to get 
 the wonted portion. 
 
 This being the case, it seemed to me that a 
 lady was as much at liberty to make love to a 
 young man, as the latter to the former, or even 
 propose to him were her discretion so to dictate. 
 While courtship was naturally to be divided 
 equally between the contracting parties. 
 
 Entering into the bond of matrimony on 
 rational grounds and the basis of equality, I con- 
 sidered, as one of the strongest and incontestable 
 marks of progress. 
 
 The nature and extent of my knowledge with 
 regard to the matter in question, can by no 
 means be said to be inconsistent with such data 
 as the above. To have known any worse, or 
 better, if you will, I had not the means during 
 
Woman's Lie 19 
 
 the first three years and a half which I spent 
 in New York City. 
 
 On the sixteenth of September, 1904, I ob- 
 tained a position as a clock repairer in P , 
 
 a town of about twenty thousand population, at 
 a salary of eighteen dollars per week. My em- 
 ployer, Mr. W. H. Mortimer, after a cordial 
 welcome, introduced me to his employees — an 
 optician, W. Garris; two watchmakers, S. Chap- 
 man and H. Wilcoxon; an engraver, E. Clouser, 
 and an assistant jeweler, W. Laughler. Then 
 he sent me out with a boy to look for a board- 
 ing house. We soon found one. At dinner 
 time I found that I was the only boarder. The 
 boarding house was conducted by two sisters — ■ 
 the Misses Lindenmuth. 
 
 As a clock repairer I was soon known as one 
 who knows his trade thoroughly. "The best 
 . one" my employer ever had from the time he 
 went into the business thirty years ago. 
 
 About four weeks after I had been in P , 
 
 Miss Annie Lindenmuth told me that a very 
 wealthy and prominent lady in the town desired 
 to learn needle-work of her, especially on rainy 
 days when she could not go out. She would 
 either come to the house or send for her. She 
 told me further how her husband had left 
 five hundred thousand dollars to her and that 
 she was liable to lose all in case she married 
 again. She kept on repeating the same story 
 adding, occasionally, that she had two daughters 
 "very rich, but not very beautiful." 
 
 I used to pass in front of their house four 
 times a day on my way to and back from work. 
 
20 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 and once or twice more to or from the reading 
 room of the Y. M. C. A. 
 
 The rich lady, Mrs. Hause, and her daugh- 
 ters met me many a time in Market Street, yet 
 I never took special notice of them nor knew 
 them to be the rich parties so often spoken of, 
 until one day on my way to work my foot 
 slipped and I was about to fall. I mentioned 
 this to Miss Lindenmuth. She desired to know 
 the exact place where the incident had occurred. 
 When I described the place she said she knew 
 the cause of it; namely, that the wealthy girls 
 lived there and that apparently while trying to 
 see them through the window I stepped on the 
 ice. From that day on I knew where the rich 
 lady and her daughters lived. I used to meet 
 them occasionally, yet I hardly paid any par- 
 ticular attention to them. I could not even dis- 
 tinguish one sister from the other for a whole 
 year. 
 
 On the last day of December, 1904, Mr. Mor- 
 timer called me down to his office and told me 
 that although he was perfectly satisfied with my 
 service yet he thought he could not engage me 
 any longer on account of not having enough 
 clock-work. He gave me a month's notice. 
 Whereupon I advertised in the "Jeweler's Cir- 
 cular" for a position. But before I obtained one 
 Mr. Mortimer sent word through Chapman that 
 he did not like to lay me off, that he would be 
 glad to offer me a steady position if I were will- 
 ing to stay with a salary of fifteen dollars per 
 week, promising to raise it again to eighteen 
 
Woman's Lie 21 
 
 dollars as soon as the clock-work increased. I 
 consented, after all, to stay. 
 
 Cummings Bros., real estate, insurance agents, 
 etc., occupied two rooms on the second floor of 
 the Hause building, which stands right opposite 
 to Mr. Mortimer's store. After a while they 
 hired a little girl to do typewriting. She had 
 her machine near the window and seemed to 
 be very much anxious to be taken notice of, and 
 was trying to engage my attention by every pos- 
 sible means. 
 
 One evening, in the dining-room at supper 
 time, I was introduced to a new boarder. He 
 to,ld me that he was a dealer in Oriental car- 
 pets, that he had been in the town once before, 
 and had had an established business for a num- 
 ber of years, and that he was well acquainted 
 with the prominent citizens who constituted the 
 sole patrons of his trade. The expensiveness 
 of his goods excluded the poorer class from 
 buying. The next day he spoke about distribut- 
 ing business cards and giving one to Jennie. 
 Who is Jennie ? 1 asked him. "Mrs. Hause has 
 a daughter," he said, "and Jennie is her name." 
 This answer was a clear indication of his ignor- 
 ance about her other daughter, who, probably, 
 I thought, had been married and was living with 
 her husband in Philadelphia during the time he 
 was at business in the town and did not happen 
 to see or hear about her. 
 
 The two sisters, Jennie and Dorothy, were 
 living with their mother. Dorothy was taller, 
 more stout and * corpulent than Jennie. I 
 naturally, took her to be the elder of the two, 
 
22 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 who, it was said, had once been married but 
 left her husband and was keeping company with 
 a man who had abandoned his wife. 
 
 I put no more questions to him about her. 
 The rest of the time we passed in various talk. 
 
 Friday, May i, 1905, I went to a new board- 
 ing house conducted by Mrs. Darby. The next 
 morning while I was going to the store I saw 
 Miss Hause standing on the steps in front of 
 their house. I advanced nearer and was not 
 very far from the door when she suddenly 
 walked in and closed the door. At six o^clock 
 in the evening, while I was coming from the 
 store, she was seated on the steps with her 
 mother. The same night, at about half-past 
 eight, her mother passed me with a quick pace 
 and stood on the doorstep. I walked up the 
 street slowly and went to my room. 
 
 They seemed to have found the successful 
 management of the Campaign, unassisted, too 
 hard a task for them. So they secured the ser- 
 vices of the typewriter in the following way. 
 If the window-blinds of Gummings Bros.' office 
 were pulled down all the afternoon on any Sat- 
 urday, I could invariably see Miss Hause at six 
 o'clock in the evening while going home, seated 
 either on the doorstop of their house or near 
 the window, sometimes reading, other times 
 sewing. On the contrary, if the typewriter 
 stayed in the office with her girl friends until 
 four o'clock in the afternoon, I knew she would 
 not expose herself to my view. 
 
 In the month of August I was about to ask 
 for a two-week vacation when Mr. Mortimer 
 
Woman's Lie 23 
 
 called me down to his office and told me that 
 he would give a month vacation for the simple 
 reason that I was single, and, by implication, 
 without pay. Seven months previously he had 
 reduced my salary from $18 to $15 per week, 
 which meant an annual reduction of $156. Now 
 another curtailment of $60 per annum. Nor is 
 this all; the worst to follow. All that is needed 
 is a little patience. 
 
 I was quite ready to leave the town for my 
 vacation trip, which I had decided to spend in 
 New York City. 
 
 Miss Hause, her mother, the typewriter, etc., 
 had doubled, if not trebled, their efforts just be- 
 fore my departure. They met more frequently 
 than could be accounted for by chance. 
 
 These people could not be deaf and dumb. 
 They all were born in this country, and, un- 
 doubtedly, knew the language well. I had been 
 studying English very hard for a number of 
 years. They knew I could understand' and 
 make myself understood to others without much 
 difficulty. Why not speak to me in some way or 
 other? How to account for their behavior, which 
 is characteristic of animals devoid of speech? 
 Could it be a means of discovering my inclina- 
 tion with regard to their plan, whatever it may 
 have been, from a mere acquaintance up to the 
 highest possible alliance, to preclude the pangs 
 of humiliation consequent on my possible atti- 
 tude of indifference to it? 
 
 I could see no better reason. I made up my 
 mind of making them know, in a somewhat in- 
 
24 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 direct way, of my willingness to meet her. Thus 
 I wrote the following letter: 
 
 "Mrs. F. Hause. 
 
 "Madam— I could hardly think that a day 
 would come when I would be bold enough to 
 write a similar letter to a lady who is a per- 
 fect stranger to me, and with whom I have not 
 exchanged a word as yet. Such a day, how- 
 ever, has come, and after much hesitation I 
 write this letter to ask the favor of a conversa- 
 tion with your daughter.* I hope the justness 
 of my intention will excuse the freedom of this 
 letter, and certain incidents in the past devised 
 by you and others closely related to the matter 
 
 *The Martians, like the Roman Catholic Church, 
 consider marriage a sacrament. Its regulation as such 
 falls within the exclusive jurisdiction of the Church. 
 Divorce is practically unknown. It cannot be obtained 
 but for adultery on the part of the wife, which the 
 husband may urge. A divorced woman must live 
 hated and alone in this world, and be prepared for 
 damnation in the next. 
 
 I have no such unfavorable opinion about divorced 
 women. Nevertheless, having lived the first twenty- 
 four years of my life under such an opinion, I have 
 contracted a decided, if not unsurmountable, antipathy 
 against them. Nor would I ascribe to the other party 
 much divergency of opinion on this particular, by 
 reason of their being a Christian family, and within 
 easy access to the authority — ^the Bible I laid her out 
 of the list of eligibles as a matter of course, and 
 never for a moment thought of the possibility of a 
 misunderstanding. This is why I wrote "with your 
 daughter," as if she had but one, while I knew she 
 had two daughters. 
 
Woman's Lie 25 
 
 in question almost assure me my request will 
 be granted when convenient. 
 
 "I made an attempt to save me any humilia- 
 tion or embarrasment that may follow in case I 
 am mistaken, and what I called above 'cer- 
 tain incidents devised by you,' etc., were usual 
 and commonplace occurrences, and conveyed no 
 special meaning. 
 
 "Yours, 
 
 "A' Stranger." 
 
 I mailed this letter from Philadelphia, where 
 I spent two of my vacation days. After spend- 
 ing the rest in New York City, I went back to 
 P . 
 
 During the first week, nothing special hap- 
 pened. But from the first day of the second 
 week Dorothy met me daily in the morning un- 
 til Friday. This displeased me for two reasons. 
 First, she was the wrong one; second, I had be- 
 come weary of this old pantomime, my let- 
 ter being in part an evidence of it. I stopped 
 passing through Market Street. 
 
 One evening Dorothy was seated on the door- 
 step of their house, while I was coming from 
 the Y. M.C. A. As soon as I came near her, 
 she laughed at me. On the following evening 
 the two sisters were seated together. They both 
 laughed this time. Three days later, Mrs. 
 Hause and her two daughters were seated, with 
 a fourth one unknown to me. They all laughed 
 at me. Whereupon I resolved to go to work 
 through West Market Street as usual, giving 
 them in this way all the chance to laugh at me. 
 
2^ The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 None, however, laughed at me after this; be- 
 sides, Jennie began to meet me, instead of her 
 sister Dorothy. 
 
 I am very fond of animals — dogs, cats, etc. 
 They took notice of this fact. They had a big 
 shepherd dog. Now this began to meet me, at 
 first every morning for over a month, accom- 
 panied with a servant boy, sometimes with Jen- 
 nie or her brother Fred. 
 
 The house where I had been residing was sold. 
 I moved to another boarding house situated at 
 SI2 West Norwegian Street, conducted by three 
 sisters, the Misses Callen. 
 
 I used to get a copy of the Evening Journal 
 daily. The newsdealer, being right opposite 
 their store, they well knew what paper I read. 
 One day I took notice on the "Home News" 
 page, under the heading "Advice to the Love- 
 lorn," of the following question and the answer 
 subjoined to it: 
 
 "Dear Miss Fairfax. 
 
 "About six months ago I saw a young man. 
 I became very desirous of being acquainted 
 with him. So far I have not been able to secure 
 an introduction. One evening a gentleman who 
 did not know the young man I wish to meet 
 offered to go and speak to him and then intro- 
 duce me. This I would not consent to. Would 
 it have been wrong? The young man I wish 
 to know, I believe, is very respectable, and if I 
 meet him I should like to make a good impres- 
 sion; therefore, I refused to take this chance, 
 as I was afraid it might not be proper. He 
 
Woman's JAe 27 
 
 lives here in my city, and I occasionally see him 
 on the streets. Can you not help me?" 
 
 "(Signed) F. H. 
 "You will make a great mistake if you force 
 an introduction in any way. I am very glad 
 you did not allow your friend to speak to the 
 young man. He would have thought it a very 
 strange proceeding. I£ you wish to make a 
 good impression on him, you will have to meet 
 him in the ordinary way, by introduction. If 
 he is anxious to meet you, he will find a way." 
 
 I was quite sure the above question was sent 
 by Miss Hause for two reasons. First, because 
 it was our case exactly ; second, because the sig- 
 nature represented her last two initials — Frank, 
 her father's name; Hause, her surname. 
 
 Now, a third party, well acquainted with per- 
 sons seeking each other's acquaintance, seems 
 to be considered indispensable to effect a for- 
 mal introduction. Such a one was not forth- 
 coming in this case. At the same time not a 
 few examples can be adduced to prove that this 
 rule has by no means been invariable. As a 
 clock repairer I had the charge of the clocks of 
 scores of families. I had made their acquaint- 
 ance without any formal introduction. They 
 could have followed this very same course. The 
 result would have been unerring. But they 
 seemed to have considered the matter quite dif- 
 ferently. They never had any clocks repaired. 
 
 One evening, while I was seated in the parlor 
 together with the three sisters, we happened 
 to talk about the wealthiest people of the town. 
 
28 Ttie Inscrutable Woman 
 
 After they had mentioned a few of them by 
 their names, I inquired of Mrs. Hause. "Oh, 
 she is very wealthy, too," said one of them. 
 
 "How many are there in the family?" I asked. 
 
 "Five in all," she said; "that is, Mrs. Hause, 
 her two sons, and two daughters." 
 
 "Can you tell me their respective ages?" I 
 asked. 
 
 "I cannot tell you by their names," she said. 
 "The one who was married once but is divorced 
 now — ^though not legally, as far as I know," she 
 added, "she has consented to leave her husband 
 upon his payment of a certain amount of money 
 — she is the oldest; next come the two sons, 
 while the other girl is the youngest in the 
 family." 
 
 I found this account quite in conformity to 
 my previous knowledge. I reckoned Jennie's 
 age to be between twenty-five and thirty. 
 
 A young man about twenty years old began 
 to draw my attention at the reading room of 
 the Y. M. C. A. I heard that he was partially 
 deaf. As a rule, he came to the reading room 
 a little earlier than I, and left there a little later. 
 He was very quiet, and spoke to nobody. He 
 usually took the chair next to mine, sometimes 
 turning his back towards me, other times his 
 face, and watched me closely, and would take 
 up the very same paper or magazine immediately 
 after my putting it on the table. One of his 
 favorite ways was to extend his arm and take 
 it right off my hand and mumble "Thank you." 
 This he would do if my behavior or demeanor 
 on that day had been cordial or friendly to- 
 
Woman's Lie 29 
 
 ward the Hause family, or been regarded so by 
 them; otherwise he would turn his back towards 
 me or would leave the reading room as soon as 
 I entered it. 
 
 One day I saw Jennie with another lady and 
 a gentleman, the latter being in a buggy, talking 
 and laughing in front of their store. It lasted 
 about half an hour. Clouser came to our side, 
 and, addressing Chapman, said: "Do you see 
 Miss Hause, Mr. Chapman? She is a kitchen 
 girl, you know, a regular flirt. She has been 
 talking and laughing with Mr. So-and-So for 
 half an hour in the street," etc. Another time, 
 while repairing a bag for her, he told me that 
 she had half a dozen husbands, yet was not 
 satisfied, and wanted more. 
 
 This remark, I thought, could not be applied 
 to Jennie, who, as far as I knew, had never been 
 married, nor even to Dorothy, without allow- 
 ance being made for a great deal of exaggera- 
 tion. 
 
 Upon another occasion I was standing near 
 the dumb-waiter. He had a few articles to send 
 down. I was the clock repairer, and, as a rule, 
 not as busy as the watchmakers. When he had 
 anything to go down, he used to tell me from 
 the other side of the partition to put them on 
 the waiter, unless somebody was near the waiter. 
 I was standing very close to the waiter, while 
 the rest were at their benches. Instead of tell- 
 ipg me to send them down, he turned to Chap- 
 man and said : "Mr. Chapman, you put this on 
 the waiter, please," and walked away toward 
 his bench. He had several times made the re- 
 
30 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 mark that I had my eyes on a rich girl in the 
 town. The idea that those articles might have 
 belonged to Miss Hause suddenly occurred to 
 me, nor was I mistaken ; three articles — a paper- 
 knife, an inkstand, and a magnifying glass, with 
 "J. H." engraved on. "Miss J. Hause" was 
 marked on the envelope. 
 
 Now, what does it matter to me if a certain 
 girl, especially when unknown to me, be a flirt 
 or have a number of husbands? These abusive 
 remarks had been but of recent date, having 
 been confined to the last two or three months. 
 Upon many occasions previously to this he had 
 behaved himself manfully. Once he repaired a 
 diamond ring for her, which was worth a few 
 hundred dollars. He told me, without my ask- 
 ing, to whom it belonged, how wealthy they 
 were, that the big building opposite to our store 
 was their property, etc. How to account for 
 such a sudden change to the worse? 
 
 Man, as a rational being, cannot but think, 
 judge, make deductions, and draw inferences. 
 
 As a matter of fact, she had been quite ag- 
 gressive in her "campaign." Everything tended 
 to show that he soon became aware of it. But 
 the idea of a wealthy woman marrying a for- 
 eigner having been repugnant to him, he had 
 resorted to scurrility as a means of giving vent 
 to his envious malignity. But if what he said 
 of her were true, I would be the loser in the 
 matrimonial bargain. 
 
 With regard to myself, I had not as yet been 
 contemplating matrimony, having been finan- 
 cially unprepared to meet the responsibilities in- 
 
Woman's Lie 31 
 
 cumbent upon married life. While in such a 
 state of mind, I took notice of her struggles. 
 She seemed to have something to say, yet could 
 not or would not do so. From the nature of 
 her efforts, Cupid's implication in the matter 
 was quite unerringly inferable. That sinister 
 and mischievous little god of antiquity seemed 
 to be hard at work in the background. Our 
 knowledge of each other was inadequate. She 
 had a good figure and a healthy constitution — 
 two commendable traits. On the other hand, 
 she stood at a disadvantage in regard to her 
 complexion. She was a brunette, while I greatly 
 prefer blondes. Nevertheless, the color alone 
 could not reasonably stand in the way, provided 
 we were otherwise adapted to each other. She 
 was of means; that meant leisure or opportunity 
 for acquiring a good education and high accom- 
 plishments. The thought that wealth oftener 
 than not makes its possessor an inveterate sen- 
 sualist, blind to the higher vocation of life, never 
 occurred to me. 
 
 Thus I had begun to regard her as my su- 
 perior. But there was another and still greater 
 obstacle to be surmounted. 
 
 The husband is considered the breadwinner by 
 nations all the world over, with but few and in- 
 significant exceptions, and justly so. Marriage 
 contracted between a wealthy woman and a poor 
 man implies a clear subversion of the general 
 rule, involving an extreme humiliation on the 
 part of the latter. This being the case, my next 
 thought was of making her know of my willing- 
 ness to undergo, though reluctantly, the implied 
 
32 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 humiliation, and as a result expecting her to 
 meet me half-way, or at least use some other 
 reasonable means instead of the hide-and-seek 
 which had been going on for over twenty 
 months. This reasoning led me to write on 
 Decoration Day the following letter to Mrs. 
 Hause : 
 
 "In a crystal well lies a drop of ink; 
 I seize my pen — but stop and think: 
 What power in this globule lies 
 To grieve the heart or to gladden the eyes! 
 Pause, my soul, and linger yet; 
 What wouldst thou do with this liquid jet? 
 Search out thy motive, ponder it well; 
 The solemn truth I bid thee tell ; 
 Is thy message one of love or hate, 
 Of truth or falsehood? For soon or late 
 Thy written words shall come again 
 To bless or curse thy ready pen. 
 If loving kindness move thy heart, 
 If noble impulse bid thee, start. 
 If clear sincerity be thine — 
 Then write; and show what power divine 
 May dwell in a drop of ink." 
 
 "Mrs. F. Hause. 
 
 "Madam — I find myself unable to keep si- 
 lence any more, ignoring the undesirable con- 
 sequences which hurt my feelings and threaten 
 to endanger your honor and respectability. 
 Fearing lest my silence be questionable as the 
 cause of aTl, I write this letter as a sort of seda- 
 tive to my conscience, and to exonerate myself 
 from further responsibility. I also hope this 
 will be of some service to you, warning you 
 against your being the subject of gossip by peo- 
 
Woman's Lie 33 
 
 pie who are eager to mind other's business rather 
 than their own. 
 
 "About two months ago, while Miss Jennie 
 was standing in front of your store with a lady 
 friend of hers, one of the employees of Mr. 
 Mortimer made a few remarks about her which 
 were anything but honorable. No gentleman 
 worthy of the name would ever make a similar 
 remark of any girl whatever. The next day he 
 was impudent enough to repeat the same re- 
 marks. I thought prudence required that I 
 should keep silence under the circumstances, 
 which I did. His conduct has been surprising 
 to me, as I had been very careful not to men- 
 tion your name, nor try to get information about 
 any one of you from him or any other .person in 
 the store. 
 
 "About a month ago he tried to conceal from 
 my view a few articles upon which was en- 
 graved the initials 'J. H.' A few days ago, 
 while you were passing through Center Street, 
 accompanied with your daughter, I was watch- 
 ing you. At the same time I noticed him try^ 
 ing to turn the attention of one of the watch- 
 makers towards me. All this, and other in- 
 stances not mentioned here, make me think that 
 he has already imparted all he knows, or thinks 
 he knows, to the watchmaker, and probably to 
 many of his acquaintances in the town. 
 
 "I shall proceed now to state in this letter 
 my past experience, my present views and in- 
 clinations with regard to the matter in ques- 
 tion. 
 
 "About eighteen months ago some of your 
 
34 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 actions impressed me with the idea that you 
 desired to become acquainted with me. I should 
 be very glad to avail myself of the first oppor- 
 tunity to secure your acquaintance, but for the 
 recollection of my past experiences.* I can 
 hardly remember an introduction to a lady or 
 gentleman who would not be sorry for, or indif- 
 ferent to, it within a week or a month. The 
 reasons are not far to seek, but I cannot go 
 into detail for want of space in a letter, the con- 
 tents of which should be limited. 
 
 "After some time 1 thought I had enough en- 
 couragement from you to justify myself in be- 
 
 *I had in mind my love of solitude and indifference 
 to society, besides, having been brought up under 
 widely different circumstances and surroundings, sub- 
 ject to a despotic government yet enjoying economic 
 independence; in contrast, on the one hand, to the 
 political liberty conceded to the American, and on 
 the other hand to the industrial slavery to which he 
 is subjected, I had ere long noticed the wide gap sep- 
 arating the Martian from the American of the «ame 
 class. 
 
 The fact that I am far from representing the aver- 
 age Martian, but one of those few who place their 
 happiness in intellectual activity, pursuit of science, 
 discoveries and inventions, makes the gap still wider, 
 and a close friendship with any average American al- 
 most impossible. 
 
 I well remember, while working for John Wana- 
 maker as a clock repairer, together with twelve others 
 — engravers, jewelers and watch repairers — some of 
 them, having one evening met me at the corner of 
 Tenth Street and Third Avenue, offered to treat me to 
 a drink. They well knew I had been a total abstainer. 
 I had told them so for no other reason than that I 
 did not like the taste, nor expected to derive any 
 benefit, from it. I thanked them, but refused to ac- 
 
Woman's Lie 35 
 
 lieving that mere acquaintance was not the goal 
 you had been striving for, but the propriety and 
 possibility of our acquaintance growing into 
 friendship, and that friendship culminating into 
 love with your daughter. Miss Jennie. Do you 
 think this too plain a statement? So much the 
 
 cept their offer. They insisted that I should accept, 
 and began to pull me in the direction of a near-by 
 saloon. Off flew three of my overcoat buttons into 
 different directions. All my pleadings were of no 
 avail. As a last refuge I threatened to call for a po- 
 liceman. This proved as effective as Ali Baba's "Se- 
 same Open." All hands were withdrawn forthwith, 
 as if by magic. 
 
 "Friends" (good, respectable, not drunkards), says 
 Ibsen, "are a costly luxury, and when one has devoted 
 one's self wholly to a profession and a mission here 
 in life, there is no place left for friends." 
 
 Compliance with their request would have put me 
 under obligation, the discharge of it leading to others, 
 rendering the entanglement in vice the more certain 
 and extrication from it the more difficult. 
 
 My spare time had been devoted to the reading of 
 mostly scientific matter, and carrying on mechanical 
 contrivances or electrical experiments. No up-to-date 
 clock repairer can dispense with a general knowledge 
 of the properties of electricity. There are numerous 
 clocks on the market run by electricity, and their num- 
 ber has been constantly increasing. 
 
 I perfected my trade in this way, and my salary was 
 raised from six dollars to eighteen dollars per vveek 
 within two years and a half. 
 
 Such a manner of living seems to be extremely re- 
 pugnant to the average American. I have been told 
 by more than one American that they would rather 
 commit suicide than live my life. I am quite sure of 
 this being an honest declaration. 
 
 I have traveled extensively, and know from my own 
 experience how the manner of living appreciably varies 
 with every change of country, the variation being 
 
36 
 
 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 better. There can be no excuse for misunder- 
 standing; besides, I do not like conventionalism. 
 "Such a thought, whether founded on facts 
 or mere imagination, did have its effect on me. 
 I felt myself highly flattered and honored. But 
 it was for a short time only, because real hap- 
 piness, to me, is not to be found in being loved, 
 but, on the contrary, in the loving.* To derive 
 happiness from the thought of being loved, in- 
 
 now slight, now so great as to be almost incredible. 
 It is being constantly reduced to a minimum of dif- 
 ference through increased facility of transportation, 
 spread of industrialism and commercial intercourse, 
 international law and arbitration consequent thereon. 
 Nevertheless it can never be entirely eliminated. It 
 will exist to a certain extent even among the indi- 
 viduals of the same nation. At the present, human 
 nature is far from being uniform all the world over. 
 Those who are aware of this, make allowance for the 
 seeming eccentricities of foreigners. 
 
 But when I told them that I would rather commit 
 suicide than live their life, they were struck dumb. 
 
 America, the most civilized country, and Americans, 
 the most civilized people in the world, who know — 
 nay, ought to know best, if it is knowable — how to 
 live, how to "have a good time," to prefer suicide to 
 such a life is a sure indication of insanity on the part 
 of those who entertain such an opinion. 
 
 Now, this book is the result of : First, a misunder- 
 standing between Americans, principally a woman and 
 a Martian ; and, second, an encounter of an iconoclast 
 against a conventionalist, the outcome of which, from 
 time immemorial, has always been as deadly and de- 
 structive as the falling of a spark on a powder 
 magazine. 
 
 *It is superfluous in me to remark that the word 
 "love," as it is used here, excludes sexual love, being 
 innate or organic with human nature in common with 
 
Woman's Lie 37 
 
 dicates pride, conceit, and egotism, while loving 
 is a sure sign of devotion and self-sacrifice. 
 
 "To my great surprise, I have been unable 
 to find Miss Jennie mentioned under the heading 
 
 'Personal Mention' of the 'P Republican' 
 
 for a time covering over twelve months. My 
 inference from this was to the effect that she 
 does not agree with other young ladies, who 
 form an overwhelming majority, in the belief 
 that the number of paying and receiving visits, 
 going to dances and balls, etc., has to decide the 
 extent of the dignity, sociality and popularity 
 of a girl. She seems to find more pleasure and 
 comfort at home than elsewhere. This, from my 
 point of view, is an ideal and most useful life. 
 She is healthy, strong, of good form, and re- 
 spectable to the extent of my knowledge. She 
 commands my highest respect and admiration. 
 
 "This letter cannot but fail to fulfil its in- 
 
 animals; nor is the vegetable world entirely exempt 
 from its influence. 
 
 I consider this impulse or appetite unmoral, and too 
 common to attach any importance to it, being always 
 tacitly understood. 
 
 The equivalent word in our language has the per- 
 manent, as opposed to this transitory, meaning. It 
 was about a year hence when I heard one of the watch- 
 makers say that he loved his wife for one hour daily. 
 This was a very queer way of making use of the 
 word love from my point of view, for the reason that 
 each man is supposed or expected or even enjoined to 
 love his wife not merely one, but twenty-four hours 
 daily, as well as his father, mother, sisters, brothers, 
 God and humanity. How I learned the full meaning 
 of love will be manifest as we proceed. 
 
38 The, Inscrutable Woman 
 
 tended mission if I neglect to make a few re- 
 marks about love. 
 
 "Love has often been described as something 
 capricious, uncontrollable, endowed with full 
 power to drag us to any direction, regardless of 
 the dictates of reason. 
 
 "Love in me is subject to Reason. It wears 
 Reason like a coat of mail no Cupid's dart can 
 pierce. Those who have passion for their 
 guide, 'we cannot resist our nature's demand' 
 for excuse, and say, 'It is better to love and be 
 lost, than never to love at all,'* to support their 
 views, and jump into the sea of matrimony with- 
 out taking the inadequacy of their means into 
 
 * 'Tis better to have loved and lost 
 Than never to have loved at all. 
 
 — Tennyson. 
 
 I had heard this of a lady in Hotel M . I can- 
 not tell whether I misunderstood her or she knew no 
 better, yet I am positive she attributed these lines to 
 Shakespeare, and in order to make her argument con- 
 sistent, it was requisite to assume the lover and the 
 lost one as identical. 
 
 The discovery of my error caused me a good deal 
 of uneasiness, yet served me a wholesome discipline 
 never to consider oral testimony as adequate for pur- 
 poses of quotation. 
 
 I have elsewhere mentioned how I had entirely de- 
 voted my spare time to the study of science and me- 
 chanics. Having been entirely in ignorance of litera- 
 ture, it would have been almost impossible for me 
 
 to have found the authority in a small town like P , 
 
 where even the need of a public library had not yet 
 been felt. 
 
 I would fain change at least this part of my letter, 
 but in that case the book would have to forfeit its 
 title, "A True Story." 
 
Woman's Lie 39 
 
 consideration, nine times out of ten, sink into 
 insignificance, plodding all day long for a bare 
 living, unable to discharge the duties incumbent 
 on a married life, and are actually lost for the 
 better, according to the opinion of Shakespeare. 
 In this I do not agree with him, and I doubt if 
 he would not greatly modify his views were he 
 living with us in the present century. 
 
 "Enclosed you will find a self-addressed enve- 
 lope. Kindly return this letter to me within a 
 week, not allowing anybody to read it. 
 
 "This request of mine might seem strange to 
 you, but never mind; as the old saying goes, 
 there is nothing too strange to happen. 
 
 "Yours respectfully, 
 "E. Baron," 
 
 Next Friday Clouser died. Wednesday even- 
 ing, at six o'clock, I locked the door of the fac- 
 tory as usual, and came down to the office to 
 put the key in the drawer. There I saw the two 
 sisters seated, apparently engaged in buying 
 some jewelry; and Thursday I received the fol- 
 lowing letter from Mrs. Hause: 
 
 June 7, '06. 
 "Mr. E. Baron. 
 
 "Dear Sir — Kindly call at 315 West Market 
 Street the coming Saturday evening, between 
 the hours of seven and eight o'clock. 
 
 "Respectfully, , 
 "Mrs. Frank Hause." 
 
 I went to their house at eight o'clock Satur- 
 
40 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 day evening. I rang the bell; Dorothy opened 
 the door. 
 
 "Will you tell me if Mrs. Hause is in?" I 
 asked her. 
 
 "Why do you want to know if she is in?" 
 
 "I should like to see her." 
 
 "Why do you want to see her?" 
 
 "Because I got a letter from her in which 
 she expresses a desire to see me." 
 
 "What is your name ?" 
 
 "Edward Baron." 
 
 Then she called her mother to the parlor. 
 Mrs. Hause walked in, and, oifering me a chair, 
 said: "Yoti write in your letter that you have 
 been in this town for eighteen months. Is that 
 right?" 
 
 "Over eighteen months. It will soon be two 
 years." 
 
 "I have never seen you. And you say you 
 work for Mr. Mortimer?" 
 
 "Yes, ma'am." 
 
 "Strange! I never knew. What is the name 
 of the jeweler who made the unbecoming re- 
 mark about my daughter?" 
 
 "Clouser, who died four days ago." 
 
 "What is your nationality?" 
 
 "Martian." 
 
 "Do you know the custom of this country?" 
 
 "The longer I stay, the better I learn.'* 
 
 After a little talk about Mr. Mortimer, I 
 asked her if she would kindly return my letter 
 and say nothing about it to anybody. "Cer- 
 tainly!" she said, and returned the letter, prom- 
 
Woman's Lie 41 
 
 ising to keep everything secret. I bade her 
 good-night and went home. 
 
 I did not expect such a complete denial of 
 facts. She could have admitted noticing me as 
 a stranger without friends and acquaintances, 
 and made a slight effort with a view to befriend- 
 ing me, in hope of rendering life more cheerful 
 or a little happier for me, or anything of like 
 nature. 
 
 I thought we could never get along with each 
 other if she would thus practice mendacity while 
 I adhered to strict veracity, being incapable of 
 acting otherwise. Truth is as irreconsilable to 
 falsehood as light to darkness. She said she 
 never knew me. It will be better for us both 
 to prolong that state of ignorance of hers in- 
 definitely. I preferred to discontinue the ac- 
 quaintance made between us, and as the only 
 means under my disposal I wrote the following 
 letter : 
 
 "June JO, 1906. 
 "Mrs. F. Hause. 
 
 "Madam — Do you remember the conversation 
 we had last night? I could not believe all what 
 you said, as I had a diary of past events. I 
 hope, however, you will excuse me for all, and 
 join with me in forgetting the past, and remain, 
 in the future, strangers to each other. 
 "Respectfully yours, 
 
 "E. Baron." 
 
 Everything went on as usual, notwithstanding 
 my expectation to be let alone, as if nothing 
 
42 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 had happened, until next Saturday evening. 
 That evening Mr. Mortimer called me to_ his 
 office and demanded an explanation for writing 
 love-letters to Miss Hause. 
 
 I simply said to Mr. Mortimer that it was not 
 a love-letter, because I wrote it to Mrs. Hause, 
 who is over sixty years old. I would by no 
 means write love-letters to a lady of her age. 
 I explained to him in a succinct manner what 
 had happened, and how people were beginning 
 to talk of us. I had merely tried to caution 
 her, as much as possible, against giving occa- 
 sion to the people to speak unpleasant things or 
 make unbecoming remarks about us. 
 
 Mr. Mortimer told me that life was too short, 
 that I did not know this country well enough, 
 that people in this country would believe the lie 
 of a woman, but not the truth of a man, and so 
 forth. 
 
 I left the office wondering all the time why, 
 if there was anything wrong in my letter, she 
 did not tell me while I was in her house. She 
 willingly returned my letter, and promised to 
 keep everything secret. After only one week 
 she broke her promise, and complained against 
 me to Mr. Mortimer in the presence of four 
 girls. I went up to my bench, whence I could 
 see the two sons of Mrs. Hause walking up and 
 down Center Street, and throwing occasional 
 glances expressive of resentment at me. 
 
 Cummings Bros, changed their typewriter — 
 an older girl, about eighteen years of age, who 
 not only tried hard with renewed vigor to draw 
 my attention from the office window, but com- 
 
Woman's Lie 43 
 
 menced to meet me five or six times, and 
 sometimes more, in a week on my way to dinner. 
 If I happened to walk on one side of a street 
 and she on the other side coming towards me, 
 she would cross the street and pass me, keep- 
 ing as close to me as possible. Chapman and 
 Wilcoxon took notice of her behavior. The 
 former said to me several times that the type- 
 writer was winking at me, and the latter made 
 the remark that perhaps she "got stuck" on me, 
 and that if he were me he would take her out. 
 
 Fred, Jennie's brother, used to meet me very 
 often; sometimes alone, at other times accom- 
 panied with the dog. Lately he had adopted a 
 new way of meeting. He tried to overtake me at 
 the corner of any street, and there come to a 
 sudden stop. I had been all the time wonder- 
 ing what he meant by it. I failed to give a sat- 
 isfactory explanation until February 9, 1907. 
 While I was sitting in their house, Mrs. Hause 
 told me how her son had heard of my letter, 
 and was angry with me. The only inference 
 that I could draw was that he was threatening 
 or trying to intimidate me. 
 
 I used to take a walk every evening up to 
 Howard Avenue, and often sit on the grass 
 anywhere between Sixteenth and Eighteenth 
 Streets. Their dog would be there sometimes 
 with a servant boy, and at other times they 
 would follow me. The young man in the read- 
 ing room of the Y. M. C. A. had been doing- 
 his part very faithfully, as mention was made 
 before. 
 
 One day, after dinner, I went to Mr. Morti- 
 
44 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 mer's office and asked him why Mrs. Hause and 
 others related to her did not let me alone. I 
 further inquired of him if he knew who Cum- 
 mings Bros, were, and who their typewriter 
 was. He said that the typewriter was not Miss 
 Hause. I said I knew that, yet she represented 
 her, or had been working in her behalf. Then 
 I asked him if he could tell me what kind of 
 people the Hause family were. 
 
 "Oh, I know them very well," he said; "they 
 are very queer people ; pay no attention to what- 
 ever they do." "I tried," I said, "but I got 
 tired. They have been doing it day after day, 
 week after week, month after month, and year 
 after year. Is there no end to it?" I gave 
 him the newspaper clipping, "Advice to the Love- 
 lorn." He read it and laughed, and advised me 
 to show it to nobody. 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 45 
 
 CHAPTER II. 
 
 CUPID GETS RE-ENFORCEMENT. 
 
 "For wealth, the god most serve, I little care. 
 Since the worst man his favors often wear." 
 
 Everything went on as usual until August 9, 
 1906. On that day I went to Mr. Mortimer and 
 expressed my desire to have a two weeks' vaca- 
 tion. He led me to the office and said that he 
 was going to lay me off on account of' not 
 getting sufficient clock-work, and that a new 
 man was soon to come who could engrave be- 
 sides doing clock-work and repairing jewelry. 
 At this time I was having much more work than 
 ever. I said, "all right," and went up to the fac- 
 tory. After a little while he called me to his 
 office again and told me to stay one more week 
 and advertise in the meanwhile for a position. 
 At the end of the week I told him I was ready 
 to go, although I had not obtained one yet. 
 
 "You can stay until the new man comes, keep- 
 ing on looking for a situation, should you fail 
 to obtain one until then you can hold your posi- 
 tion with me at a salary of thirteen dollars per 
 week. Now I am about to send William (his 
 son) to a military school," he added, "that will 
 cost a thousand dollars a year. I do not know 
 where that money is to come from." 
 
 From my wages, I suppose. 
 
 I thought I Jiad been contributing more than 
 
4-6 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 I could afford towards the education of his son. 
 The reader well remembers how my salary had 
 already been reduced: first three dollars per 
 week and then a four weeks' vacation without 
 pay, making the two together $216 per annum. 
 Not satisfied with this, he is planning a third 
 yearly reduction of $104. Who can endure this? 
 I, "the best clock repairer he ever had," was the 
 only one among the other ten employees whose 
 salary had to be trimmed at least once a year. 
 At the same time he was worth probably over 
 $300,000 and could well afford to spend ten 
 thousand dollars a year without curtailing my 
 salary. 
 
 I consented to stay until the new man came, 
 but refused to work for him at a reduced salary. 
 Seeing my inflexibility he gave up the idea of a 
 third reduction. 
 
 When the "Old Home Week" was over I 
 asked him if I could have my vacation. 
 
 "No, I don't think you can," he said "there 
 is so much work to be done, but you can have 
 one week if you are very desirous to have a 
 vacation." 
 
 This occasioned great surprise to me as well 
 as to the other employees, who could not swear 
 to his sanity. It was but a few weeks ago he 
 seemed to have decided to dispense with my serv- 
 ices for lack of clock-work, now he refuses to 
 give me a vacation (without pay). But it seemed 
 to me that Mr. Mortimer had been acting upon 
 the advice of Mrs. Hause, who had an idea that 
 I was in love and would on no account consent 
 to have me leave the town. When she discov- 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 47 
 
 ered her mistake she devised more effective 
 means to carry on her purpose, as will be made 
 clear by what is to follow. 
 
 After spending my vacation in New York, I 
 came back and resumed work. The situation had 
 not changed, yet nothing special happened until 
 about the middle of October, 1906, when a new 
 boarder came — a school teacher, engaged by Mr. 
 Tailor, the proprietor of a private school. His 
 name was W. D. Anthony. We met each other 
 on Sunday at the breakfast table. I was told he 
 was a stranger having no friends in the town. 
 I was engaged in remodelling a toy ferris wheel 
 so it could be run my motor and battery. Hav- 
 ing a large, sunny and cheerful room, I knocked 
 at his door and told him that if he felt lonesome 
 he could come to my room and make himself at 
 home. He appeared to enjoy the sight as well 
 as the operation of the wheel. I showed to him 
 many other toys and contrivances operated 
 mostly by electricity of which I had over a dozen 
 kinds. I had been interested in electricity ever 
 since I was seventeen years old, and am a fairly 
 good theoretical electrician. After a while he 
 asked me if I was married. No, not yet, I said, 
 nor do I expect to marry for a number of years 
 to come. 
 
 He had only been in the house for three days 
 when he commenced to make girls a subject of 
 constant talk. He said that he could not find a 
 good-looking girl in the town; that he had seen 
 the beautiful girls of the South and thought he 
 could not stay here a whole year, and were he to 
 stay a full year that would be the longest year 
 
48 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 for him; that he would not live one day in this 
 world were there no girls at all; that he was an 
 artist and beauty expert, also that he had al- 
 ready fallen in love seventeen times so far — one 
 one hundred and seventy-five-pound girl, another 
 one hundred and fifty pounds, a pigeon-toed girl, 
 etc. At the present he had but one, in Virginia 
 somewhere, a very beautiful girl. He loved her 
 very dearly, and had the photo of her. He had 
 been striving hard to win her and was always in 
 fear of losing her because she had many other 
 admirers. 
 
 Next Sunday morning he knocked at my door, 
 He had in his hand some art-work to show me — 
 three nude figures of women, his own drawings. 
 In the afternoon we took a walk together. We 
 were coming down West Market Street. When 
 we came as far as Fourth Street he made an at- 
 tempt to pass over to the other side where the 
 Hause family lived. I noticed the direction of 
 his movement, but without paying any attention 
 I kept on walking down the same side of the 
 street and he followed me. We walked down 
 as far as North Center Street, while turning 
 around the corner I noticed Fred coming to- 
 wards us. I turned my face toward Mr. Ken- 
 nedy's drug store, pretending not to see him. 
 He advanced and made his wonted stop, making 
 enough noise to draw my attention. I turned 
 towards him. He was walking sideways and 
 wearing a severe expression of countenance. 
 We came home, Anthony still complaining that he 
 could not see any good-looking girls in the town. 
 
 Next Wednesday he took me into his room, 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 49 
 
 and after showing me a number of books he 
 gave me "The Science of Nature" to read, which 
 treats exclusively of love, matrimony, etc. 
 "Whether you intend to marry or not," he said, 
 "the reading of it is bound to do you good. This 
 is a book which is to be read by all of either 
 sex." I took it to my room and began to read. 
 
 Besides his frequent talk of girls, making 
 love, courtship, etc., I could not but see that his 
 actions were in full accord with those of Cum- 
 mings Bros., their typewriter and the young man 
 in the reading room of the Y. M. C. A., also he 
 had his name written on the fly-leaf of all his 
 books except the one which he gave me to read. 
 This gave me the impression that he did not 
 own the book ; that it was lent to him only to be 
 given to me for reading. Remembering how 
 Mrs. Hause had asked me, while in their house, 
 if I knew the custom of this country, I thought, 
 probably Mr. Anthony would teach me all about 
 it, how to behave, what the convention approves 
 and what condemns, etc., I decided to confide 
 in him everything that had taken place. 
 
 One evening while taking supper he narrated 
 a long chain of his adventures with girls. After 
 supper I invited him to my room and making 
 him promise to keep everything secret, I began 
 this way. 
 
 "I have never kept company with girls nor 
 had anything to do with them so far. I came 
 to this town a little over two years ago. Almost 
 during the whole of this time I have had some 
 adventures. Some queer things have happened 
 to me and still are happening. I cannot under- 
 
30 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 stand them nor do I know what to do." I told 
 him all that had happened to me, and then asked 
 him if he could understand or make anything 
 out of it. 
 
 He said that mine was a very strange case, 
 that it had never happened to him nor had ever 
 heard the like happening to someone else, in con- 
 sequence he was unable to understand, much le^s 
 to give me any advice, and that after a night's 
 sleep and rest he might be able to say something 
 about it. In the morning I asked him if he could 
 make anything out of it. He said that he was 
 as puzzled as ever. 
 
 Upon another occasion I told him about the 
 typewriter — how she met me so often on my 
 way to dinner and other places, looking at my 
 face, etc. I asked him what he would do if he 
 were me. He said he would ask the girl if his 
 face were dirty. I mentioned the peculiar be- 
 havior of Fred, his coming to a sudden stop at 
 the corners of streets. I further told him how 
 while we were taking our first Sunday walk to- 
 gether he had done the very same thing. He said 
 he took no notice of it, probably on account of 
 not having known him in person. I said that it 
 was childish whatever he may mean by it. Evi- 
 dently he gets his instructions from his mother, 
 so does the typewriter, and all the rest. They all 
 have been behaving like little children from my 
 point of view. There seems to be a great deal of 
 truth in the assertion of woman's intellectual in- 
 feriority to man. They do not seem to abandon 
 their childishness even in their most mature 
 years. (Let the reader have this in mind in 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforccment 51 
 
 order to see how she will vindicate her superior- 
 ity to man in the future.) Anthony said that he 
 could not see any sense in doing such things. 
 After this conversation Fred never acted in the 
 same manner again. Apparently Anthony told 
 him all the remarks I made and so he stopped it. 
 
 On the eleventh day of November Anthony 
 announced the advent of a new boarder, a teacher 
 in the same private school, B. Dougherty. 
 
 I had not taken much interest in his frequent 
 talk of girls, hugging, kissing, etc., and had 
 even objected more than once to it. But the 
 coming of the new boarder gave Anthony a good 
 chance to talk of girls. They were free, of 
 course, to talk on any subject whatever. Dough- 
 erty also, like Anthony, said he had a girl with 
 whom he had been in constant communication. 
 He had her photo which he showed to me. 
 Thus they would take up the girl problem daily 
 and discuss it from every possible point of view. 
 
 The harmony of the actions of all concerned, 
 had been too plain for me to have escaped notice. 
 If I happened to pass any day through West 
 Market Street, and was considered to have been 
 in good humor and favorably disposed towards 
 them, Cummings Bros, and their typewriter 
 spent the greater part of the day near the win- 
 dow ; she looked towards me from the window 
 and smiled ; she met me in the street on my way 
 to dinner. Either Jennie or her brother Fred 
 also met me accompained with the dog. The 
 young man at the Y. M. C. A. sat close to me 
 wearing a very friendly expression, and picked 
 up every paper or magazine immediately I put 
 
52 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 it on the table, and at six o'clock in the evening 
 Anthony and Dougherty would wait for me in 
 the parlor talking of girls. At the ringing of 
 the supper bell we would go down to the dining- 
 room and continue the discussion while eating 
 our supper. After supper some more girl-talk, 
 or some other subject like watches or clocks, 
 physics or electricity, or anything which was 
 more or less interesting to me, and enabled me to 
 have my part in the conversation. Last of all 
 they would go to night school and I to the 
 Y. M. C. A. 
 
 On the contrary, if I did not happen to pass 
 up or down West Market Street, and was re- 
 garded not to have been favorably disposed to- 
 wards them, then on that day the typewriter did 
 not expose herself at the window; nor did she 
 meet me in the street while going to get my 
 dinner. Even the dog did not neglect its ex- 
 pression of displeasure by hiding itself from my 
 view. Anthony and Dougherty did not wait for 
 me in the parlor just before the supper. At the 
 supper table they discussed American history of 
 which I was entirely ignorant; I had, in conse- 
 quence, to keep silence. After supper they went 
 direct to school, while I took a walk first and 
 then went to the Y. M. C. A. The young man 
 at the Y. M. C. A. either turned his back to me 
 or left the building as soon as I entered. 
 
 Anthony and Dougherty used to go to church 
 every Sunday morning and evening and the latter 
 to Sunday-school as well. The reason, they said 
 they went to church was to see the girls, other- 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 53 
 
 wise they had the Bible in their own rooms and 
 could read it any time they desired. 
 
 One day Anthony told me of a good-looking 
 girl in the choir of the M. E. Church, where 
 they always went. He would, he said, very much 
 like to know who she was, but that he had been 
 tmable so far to get any information of her. 
 He asked me to go to the church with him, to 
 see if I could tell who she was, as I had been 
 ' in the town much longer than he. One Sun- 
 day evening I consented to go with them to the 
 church, and discovered her to be the bookkeeper 
 in the store of Mr. Mortimer, where I myself 
 was employed. From that day on she became 
 the principal subject of talk for several weeks 
 as the best-looking girl in the choir, until one 
 day we were told that she was engaged, expect- 
 ing soon to marry. 
 
 Dougherty tried many a time to win my con- 
 fidence with regard to my adventures with the 
 girl. He said to me that I did not look like one 
 who is interested in girls, or care for them, or 
 contemplate matrimony, etc. I paid no attention 
 to him. At last when he discovered that I 
 would not confide in him he began to excuse 
 himself, leaving me and Anthony alone. 
 
 Next Anthony bought some art pictures, 
 mostly classic poses, and decorated their room 
 with them. 
 
 On Sundays after dinner we used to sit in the 
 parlor. Anthony very often would say, "Ah, I 
 wish I had a one hundred and fifty-pound girl 
 on my lap now. How I would kiss her, love 
 her (an example for the use of the word love). 
 
54 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 hug her, embrace her (in an ascending tone). I 
 would not live in this world one day but for 
 that." 
 
 I prefer to omit here some of their remarks 
 as liable to be offensive to the readers ; neverthe- 
 less, few of them will be mentioned in the 
 sequel. 
 
 One evening while Anthony was telling me 
 how he met his girl I listened to him very at- 
 tentively for the express purpose to see how he 
 got introduced to her. But he made no mention 
 of it. Whereupon I asked him if a formal in- 
 troduction to a girl was absolutely necessary be- 
 fore one could speak to her. 
 
 "No," he said, "not always." 
 
 "Now you see," I said, "I have been sur- 
 rounded by so many people for such a long 
 time. They neither let me alone nor gave me 
 a chance to speak to her so we could understand 
 each other. What do they mean, do you think, 
 practicing coquetry to the extreme degree ?" 
 
 "No doubt they mean something," he said, 
 "and if you wait long enough everything will 
 come out as it should. It cannot possibly be 
 coquetry, but rather something favorable to 
 you." 
 
 "Last June," I said, "while I was in their 
 house, Mrs. Hause asked me of my nationality, 
 and I told her that I was a Martian. This 
 answer may have disappointed her, because we 
 are not much thought of in this country. And 
 in order to get rid of me she may have said 
 that she did not know me. Should this be the 
 case, it would still be all right; but why not let 
 
Cupid 'Gets Re-enforcement 55 
 
 me alone. I do not care for the girl, nor could 
 I as far as that is concerned, because I do not 
 know the girl at all." 
 
 About a week after this Anthony asked me if 
 
 I had seen an article in the P Republican 
 
 about Martians. I said that I had not. Then 
 he said that it was on the table, and I could 
 read it if I liked. 
 
 I immediately went to the parlor. There were 
 two copies of it. ,One of them was the current 
 edition, and the other, containing the article, was 
 old by three days. It read as follows : 
 
 "MARTIANS IN AMERICA. 
 
 "It is asserted that in proportion to their 
 number here the Martians have more vot.ers 
 than any other nationality among our immi- 
 grants. It is said that there are 500,000 * Mar- 
 tians in the country and that 350,000 * of them 
 are voters. This being the case, it has been 
 asked whether they form a desirable source 
 from which to recruit citizens. In reply Dr. 
 Andrew White is quoted by The Marse as say- 
 ing: 
 
 " 'It is one of the finest races in the world, 
 physically, intellectually, and morally. If I were 
 asked to name the most desirable races to be 
 added by immigration to the American population 
 I would name among the very first the Mar- 
 tians. The most correct electric meter is said 
 to have been the invention of a Martian. It may 
 
 *A11 the numbers are altered for a reason ah-eady 
 mentioned. (See Introduction, page S, footnote.) 
 
S6 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 be surprising to know that the green color of 
 the American banknotes was invented by a Mar- 
 tian youth years ago. As they are merchants 
 and have established themselves in the business 
 ■centers of the country, so they are a people of 
 learning, and number scores of skillful physi- 
 cians, dentists, and theologians throughout the 
 States. It is interesting to notice that while 
 American missionary societies send missionaries 
 among the Martians, there are one hundred and 
 seventy ordained ministers of Martian birth in 
 the country laboring in the American churches. 
 
 A Martian, H. Patigon, of Fresno, was the 
 winner of the McKinley monument contest, and 
 it was only the other day that another young ar- 
 tist, L. D. Jacobi, captured the highest prize 
 ($2,000) at Yale among the hundreds of native 
 scholars. The Martians in this country publish 
 one hundred and forty periodicals in their lan- 
 guage, chiefly in Boston, New York and Cali- 
 fornia. Wherever they go they establish libra- 
 ries and reading-rooms. If you go to any public 
 library the librarian will tell you that the Mar- 
 tians attend that institution, too, more regularly 
 and draw more books from it proportionately 
 than any other class.' " 
 
 There were three reasons for thinking that 
 this article was intended exclusively for me. 
 First, I was the only Martian in the town ; sec- 
 ond, this article offered evidence in disproof of 
 my statement of an unfavorable opinion as en- 
 tertained by Americans with respect to Mar- 
 tians, and, third, I had somehow overlooked 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 57 
 
 the article. They undoubtedly inferred this from 
 my silence about it. It failed of its object, so 
 they brought an old copy to show me my mis- 
 take. This article, very flattering and encour- 
 aging though it was, could not show me the way 
 out of the dilemma. 
 
 Anthony wrote many love letters to his girl. 
 As a rule they were very long and full of en- 
 dearing or affectionate expressions. Before 
 mailing them he would call me to his room or 
 come to mine and read everyone of them to me. 
 I thought that he was, in an indirect manner, 
 trying to teach me how to write love letters, how 
 to address to a girl, what kind of words and ex- 
 pressions to use. 
 
 One evening, after reading his love letters to 
 me as usual, I asked him if he would write one. 
 for me. "Certainly," he said, "but you will have 
 to sign your name and mail it to her." 
 
 "Whom do you mean by 'her' "? I asked him. 
 
 "Why, your girl," he said. 
 
 "Who is my girl," I queried. 
 
 "Well, I do not pretend to know, but who- 
 ever she may be," he said. 
 
 I did not consent, after all, to have him write 
 any letter for me, yet what inference could have 
 been more natural for me to have drawn from 
 his love letters than the . probability of my 
 would-be-girl's expectation of a letter or letters 
 interspersed with terms expressive of affection, 
 esteem, and admiration towards her. In order 
 to put this reasoning to the test I wrote the fol- 
 lowing note or one very similar to it. I have 
 not kept the duplicate. 
 
58 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 "Dear Miss Jennie: Will you kindly let me 
 know at your first convenience if I may call on 
 you at your residence. I do not think a formal 
 introduction to be necessary. Should you please 
 to give me a chance, I have no doubt I shall ex- 
 plain everything to your satisfaction." 
 
 I do not exactly remember how I ended or 
 signed my name. 
 
 I received no answer. I said nothing to An- 
 thony about my writing of such a note, but he 
 soon began to complain that the answer of his 
 last letter was much overdue, wondering if post- 
 office authorities had been detaining his letter. 
 He said he was going to set the postoflfice build- 
 ing on fire as soon as he discovered that the non- 
 delivery of the letter was due to the neglect of 
 the letter carriers. He repeated the same story 
 day after day, expressing it in different ways, 
 and giving it different forms, that somebody was 
 soon to suffer for the delay of his letter. 
 
 "How is it," I asked him one day, while he 
 was complaining again for not getting the an- 
 swer of his letter, "that when I write a letter 
 and get no answer I make no mention of it, 
 while you have been making so much fuss about 
 it?" 
 
 "Because," he said, " 'a faint heart never won 
 a fair lady.' I am not like you. I never give 
 up. Should the answer delay I go to the post- 
 office and make inquirements about it, then ask 
 the neighbors if any letter, not belonging to 
 them, has by some mistake been delivered to 
 them." 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 59 
 
 I was much puzzled and could not understand 
 what had been going on around me. It seemed 
 as if everything went wrong. Who was to 
 blame for it? Myself? Perhaps so, but I could 
 never see where my mistake was. I had asked 
 Anthony many a time if I had done or still been 
 doing anything wrong. He merely said that he 
 could not see anything wrong on my part, that 
 he could have done no better if he were me un- 
 der the circumstances, and that the blame rested 
 entirely on the other party. 
 
 Dougherty said that he was a prohibitionist. 
 He frequently talked about the drinking evil, 
 against intoxication, and saloons. I soon dis- 
 covered that he was at pains to learn if my par- 
 ents had been addicted to the use of intoxicants. 
 One day I said that there was one good thing 
 together with many bad ones abounding in our 
 country, viz., the absence of saloons, and that 
 very few people were habitual drunkards. 
 
 From this day on he entirely dismissed the 
 subject, apparently this remark was considered 
 a satisfactory proof of my not being descended 
 from drunkards. 
 
 I had been suspected of a number of defects, 
 some natural, others inherited. Anyone, they 
 said, would take me for a misogamist, that 
 phrenologists would unanimously declare the re- 
 gion of amativeness in my cranium to have been 
 atrophied or not developed in full, etc. All of 
 them were extremely frivolous, and they knew 
 them to be so. But I was in this way expected 
 to be put to thinking as to why people should 
 entertain such absurd opinions about me unless I 
 
6o The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 had given them good reasons for it. I was well 
 aware of the difference between my manner of 
 living and that of the average American. But 
 this was due to difference of nationality, etc., as 
 has already been mentioned. The unexpected 
 appearance of a feminine figure in the street had 
 not yet caused a sudden turn of my head so as to 
 have dislocated the neck-bone, nor flattened the 
 tip of my nose by holding it against the window- 
 glass in order to keep her in view the longest. 
 
 Anthony, while seated in my room, frequently 
 rushed towards the window, looking out. At 
 first, I naturally asked him the reason of it, but 
 later on I could well dispense with this trouble. 
 I knew a woman was passing through the street, 
 and he told me unasked whether she were 
 homely or good looking, well or ill-dressed, of 
 good figure or out of all proportion. Also few 
 remarks about her corporeal frame, and the 
 most probable size and shape of the children she 
 was liable to give birth to, adding occasionally 
 as to his constant feeling of helplessness under 
 the charm of feminine beauty. Woman's influ- 
 ence over him was irresistible. No matter how 
 deeply he may have been immersed in his studies; 
 the rustling of a dress, an easy and nimble walk, 
 or a soft, sweet voice, was enough to disturb 
 his study, make his heart palpitate, and set his 
 gaze upon the intruder in sheed admiration. He 
 could no more help this than the sun could help 
 rising at the east in the morning; 
 
 One day he brought a diary wherein, he said, 
 was to be found the record of his meetings v/itb 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 6i 
 
 his girl. He read in it a few passages as fol- 
 lows : 
 
 "July 5, 1905. I went to my sweetheart's resi- 
 dence. I was led into the parlor and given a 
 seat. She stepped in, a merry smile drifting 
 over her sweet, healthily-delicate face, her cheeks 
 flushed like two full-blown roses, beautifully 
 dressed in pure white. I wonder if she is a mor- 
 tal or a visitor from the empyreal sphere. Am 
 I awake or dreaming? Lo, she gracefully ex- 
 tends her hand and takes mine in hers. I feel a 
 tremor running through my body, my mind be- 
 comes agitated, my heart palpitates. Oh, how 
 unworthy I feel myself of her. Her gentle touch, 
 her graceful, radiant smile, her delicate, sweet 
 voice uttering greetings to me allays my excite- 
 ment and subfuses my heart with hope and cour- 
 age. We commenced our talk at two o'clock in 
 the afternoon, our conversation being limited to 
 one hour. I thought we had only five minutes' 
 talk when the clock struck three. Could the clock 
 be out of order? I consulted my watch. It in- 
 dicated three o'clock exactly. ' We had to part 
 from each other. Oh, cursed hour 
 
 "August 10, 1905. She was playing the piano 
 and singing as I stepped in. I assured her noth- 
 ing could please me more than to see her play, 
 as I was so fond of music, vocal or instru- 
 mental. 
 
 "Oh, how beautiful to see her little white fin- 
 gers nimbly plying the keys. The silver sweet 
 sound of her voice sends a delightful thrill 
 through my whole frame. I become enchanted 
 with the music, I feel as if I am living no more 
 
62 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 among mortal surroundings nor standing on the 
 'cursed' earth, but — Ah, miserable time, cruel 
 monster, thus swallow my most delightful mo- 
 ments as soon as they are created 
 
 "September 15, 1905. It is half past two, I 
 have to wait another full hour before I can call 
 on my beloved. What a long time to wait, the 
 hands of the clock seem to hesitate to advance, 
 a minute never seemed so long to me, even the 
 ticks of the clocks do not seem to succeed with 
 their wonted rate of rapidity — it is fifteen 
 minutes after three now. I hurry to my girl's 
 residence. At half-past three I ring the bell. 
 The door is opened. A written message for me. 
 'My dear Anthony; I greatly regret that I shall 
 be unable to keep the appointment made for half- 
 past three o'clock this afternoon, as I have been 
 suddenly called from the city by the illness of 
 my aunt at Carbonville. Your loving, D.' 
 
 "How depressed I feel and full of fore- 
 bodings." 
 
 "Have you got one like this?" he asked me. 
 
 "Yes," I said, "but there is a great difference 
 between the contents of my diary and yours. 
 You have in your diary the record of your mental 
 states or subjective feelings. They are true re- 
 latively to yourself, but considered objectively 
 they are no more true than the ravings of some 
 maniac. People give little credence, nor attach 
 any importance to them. But what I have in 
 mine are objective facts. They are true for me, 
 for all; now and always. Nevertheless I prefer 
 not to read them to you." I was quite sure he 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 63 
 
 would impart to the other party all he thus could 
 learn from me. 
 
 "Whether you show them to me or not," he 
 said, "I would advise you not to discontinue the 
 writing of them. You will value them very 
 highly in the future, I would not exchange mine 
 for an equal weight of gold," and he put it 
 away. 
 
 The suicide prohlem had been another subject 
 for discussion. Anthony talked now and then 
 about people who had committed suicide under 
 various circumstances and in different ways. He 
 asked me my opinion, if the act would admit of 
 justification in some cases. I told him I had al- 
 ways thought that it was cowardly to commit 
 suicide, that I had had many miserable times 
 yet my still being alive was an undeniable proof 
 that I had not taken my life with my own hands, 
 nor did I think a day might come when I would 
 perpetrate the act in cold blood. In a word, I 
 assured him that under no circumstances would 
 I commit suicide. Occasionally, upon seeing 
 me more or less nervous and complaining against 
 their unnatural or barbarous treatment of having 
 constantly compelled my attention to a certain 
 direction for over two years, thus making an 
 abusive use of my mental faculties, as no human 
 being could be subjected to without infliction of 
 irreparable injury to his mind, he said, "If you 
 do not commit suicide you will marry the girl." 
 
 I had told him many a time that it was not a 
 question of marryinsr but, first of all, knowing 
 the girl. Of the three species of love — Sexual, 
 
64 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 Aesthetic, and Platonic* or Rational love, Sex- 
 ual love is organic shared with animals. There 
 is no perfect man who is incapable of loving 
 transitorily one of the opposite sexes without 
 selective discrimination. Bawdy-houses, abound- 
 ing in almost all parts of the world, fully cor- 
 roborate this. Sexual love is the most common 
 and morally considered the most worthless love. 
 The most developed man has the least of it. 
 
 Aesthetic love may be said to be partly innate, 
 but capable of cultivation to an almost indefinite 
 degree. Beauty has always been a guide in the 
 selection of a wife, yet the type is never invaria- 
 ble for different persons. Nor any moral value 
 can be attached to this love. 
 
 Platonic, rational, or divine love, the love that 
 may be accounted for, as when one lavishes 
 his affection upon another for the sake of her 
 character, disposition and habits that have moral 
 value, are prized universally and declared to be 
 worthy of love, is the most important love. It 
 is lasting while the others are only temporary. 
 To consider love at sight as an innate recognition 
 of affinity is a gross superstition. All the female 
 creation has affinity to the male creation as all 
 edibles have affinity to sentient beings. The 
 union of the latter being of more importance and 
 of far more frequent occurrence than that of the 
 former. Agamogenesis is known to exist among 
 certain lower stages of the animal kingdom, but 
 the sustenance of life without taking in nutriment 
 is an impossibility. The highly developed man 
 
 *For a full discussion of this subject, see pp. 107-124. 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforccment 6^ 
 
 of the future will contract matrimony from duty, 
 and rational love, leaving the sexual impulses en- 
 tirely out of account. Now rational love as in- 
 dispensable in the selection of a life-partner can 
 in no way be cultivated than through intimate 
 acquaintance and friendship with the proper 
 party. This being the case I am either to be 
 allowed to see and speak to her so we can know 
 and understand each other or be let alone." 
 
 "Yes," he said, "you are perfectly right, but 
 I cannot understand why the other party should 
 have treated you in this way." He did not say, 
 however, how he knew I was going to marry her 
 if I did not commit suicide. 
 
 The old year passed and the new one, 1907, 
 stepped in, but the situation had not changed. 
 To live under the scrutinizing gaze of so many 
 people for an indefinite time was as much un- 
 natural as it was impossible. I began to give 
 way. My nervousness increased, worry and rest- 
 lessness overtook me. I could not sleep very 
 well and when I got up in the morning I felt 
 tired. My condition was becoming intolerable. 
 Something was to be done, but what and how I 
 could not tell. One day at our supper I asked 
 Anthony to come to my room after supper. 
 
 "Yes, I will," he said. 
 
 So we went to my room. 
 
 "If I give you the name, address and other 
 necessary information about the girl in question 
 would you try to introduce me to her," I asked 
 him, after being seated. 
 
 "Yes, I will," he said, "but it will take a very 
 long time to do that because I know none of the 
 
66 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 family. I have, first, to get acquainted with them 
 and then find some way to introduce you to her." 
 
 "Well, I am willing to wait as long it is be- 
 comes necessary," I said, "because I know of no 
 better way. Besides," I added, "you had not 
 been in this boarding-house more than a fort- 
 night when one evening while sitting together in 
 the parlor you told me how you had introduced 
 many young people who were so situated as to 
 have no means of an introduction, and reconciled 
 many more who had been alienated from each 
 other on petty quarrels. But for the recollection 
 of this I would never have thought of making 
 you such a proposition." 
 
 "I do not remember saying anything of that 
 kind," he said. 
 
 He may have been right, but I am quite sure 
 that if he did remember and it suited to his pur- 
 pose to say he did not he would not hesitate to 
 deny it. 
 
 Immediately after this both sisters, Jennie and 
 Dorothy, began to keep themselves out of my 
 sight. The typewriter stopped meeting me and 
 flirting from the window of the office. The dog 
 was not to be seen in the streets any more. The 
 young man did not come regularly to the reading- 
 room as he used to do, and when he did come 
 he would leave the building as soon as I went in, 
 or if he stayed there would turn his back towards 
 me. The indication was that I was to be de- 
 serted and left all to myself. Anthony and 
 Dougherty were very eager to talk about girls 
 from every possible point of view, remarking 
 now and then that woman's "No" meant "Yes," 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 67 
 
 that they were willing to spend for an engage- 
 ment ring so much and no more, and asking me 
 how much would I spend for one, or if I was 
 afraid lest I could not get along with my mother- 
 in-law. 
 
 As a rule, Saturday evenings after supper, 
 Anthony and Dougherty went out together. On 
 Saturday evening, January 12, Anthony offered 
 to take a walk with me. While going up West 
 Norwegian Street, he invited my attention to 
 the lights burning in a house just built and 
 situated five or six doors from our boarding- 
 house. I was not interested to find out who 
 lived there. Next Saturday evening we walked 
 together in the same direction, but nothing of 
 importance occurred. During the following 
 week Dougherty gave me a book called "What a 
 young man ought to know." I read it to the 
 end. 
 
 Friday, January 25, I went to St. Clair, to fix 
 a musical box owned by a German lady. She 
 asked me if I was married. I said no. She 
 said I was old enough to marry and that any 
 girl would be but too glad to marry a young 
 man having my trade. She offered to introduce 
 me to the girls of her acquaintance, numbering 
 over a dozen, so I could make my choice. I 
 simply thanked her and said that I was not in 
 a hurry as far as that was concerned. 
 
 It makes no difference whether she was 
 merely joking or not, but it put me to thinking 
 that if this lady could and was willing to intro- 
 duce me to so many girls why could not Mrs. 
 Mortimer introduce me to Miss Hause? So J 
 
68 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 made up my mind to speak to her of it the very 
 next day, having in mind the advice of Miss 
 Beatrice Fairfax that "It is the young man's 
 place to find a means of introduction to a young 
 lady." Therefore, to see Mrs. Mortimer, the 
 wife of my employer, I thought, would be proper 
 and to the point. 
 
 Having a headache that day, I went to bed 
 at half-past nine. After a few minutes Anthony 
 and Dougherty came from night school. An- 
 thony sat down in his room, being next to mine, 
 and Dougherty, standing near the door, com- 
 menced to talk in a loud tone until eleven 
 o'clock. I could not sleep, not even after they 
 had retired to their separate rooms, because I 
 was tired rolling over and over in my bed. I 
 had but two hours sleep during the night. I got 
 up in the morning tired and suffering from 
 headache. 
 
 At ten o'clock A. M., while going to see Mrs. 
 Mortimer, I met the two sisters at the door of 
 the new-built house to which, fourteen days ago, 
 my attention was drawn by Anthony. I could 
 see now the occupants of the house, the two 
 daughters of Mrs. Hause, buying groceries. 
 Thereupon I changed my mind and did not go to 
 see Mrs. Mortimer. At dinner time I inquired 
 of Miss Callen about the party that occupied 
 the new house. 
 
 "About three weeks ago," she said, "one of 
 the daughters of Mrs. Hause got married and 
 has been living there." 
 
 "Which one," I asked her. "Can you tell me 
 the name?" 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 69 
 
 "No, I cannot," she said, "because I do not 
 know them by their name but only by sight." 
 
 "Do you know if she is the old one?" I asked 
 her again. 
 
 "No, the young one," she said. 
 
 I put no more questions to her. The girl 
 whose introduction and acquaintance I was seek- 
 ing had been married for three weeks. It was 
 all over. But I was at a loss to understand the 
 behavior of those around me. I could not but 
 give two explanations, either I was insane or 
 Mrs. Hause had been trying to avenge some 
 supposed injury caused by my letters, or for 
 having held the aifection of her daughter for 
 such a long time and trifled with it. This last 
 explanation seemed to me the more probable be- 
 cause the first was clearly absurd, having the 
 testimony of all those who came in contact with 
 me to the contrary. I knew well that it was not 
 my fault. I had always been ready and willing 
 to meet her and come to an understanding, but 
 I did not know how. This worried me a great 
 deal. At first I made up my mind to see Mrs. 
 Hause and apologize ; her daughter having been 
 married she could not possibly suspect the" sin- 
 cerity of my apology. 
 
 In the afternoon Mr. Mortimer called me 
 down and told me that the sleigh was ready for 
 me to go to Minersville in order to fix a musical 
 box. The sleigh soon started, gliding along 
 over the snow. It was a clear day ; the sun was 
 shining. I did not feel well, as I said before. 
 The reflection of the sun's rays from the white 
 snow made my head dizzy. I said to the driver 
 
70 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 to turn back because I could not go any further, 
 much less fix the musical box. I came back to 
 the store and told Mr. Mortimer how I felt. I 
 received permission to go home. It was four 
 o'clock in the afternoon. Before going home I 
 walked across the street to see Mr. Cummings. 
 "Do you know Mrs. Hause and all the fam- 
 ily?" I asked him, when we were left alone in 
 his office. 
 
 "I know every one of them very well." 
 "It is over two years during which it has 
 always seemed to me that there was some tacit 
 understanding between me and the younger 
 daughter of Mrs. Hause; and of late the indi- 
 cations were that I was about to meet her, when 
 at a sudden I heard that she had been married 
 for three weeks. I have been surrounded by a 
 number of people planning and working all in 
 one accord, their attention having been centered 
 at me, especially two school teachers, who have 
 been boarding with me, and all the time talking 
 about girls, using, sometimes, indecent and im- 
 proper words. They gave me certain books to 
 read. All were matrimonial books, and they 
 acted in such a peculiar way as to leave no 
 doubt of their being in constant communication 
 with Mrs. Hause. They seemed to take all their 
 advice from her, either directly or indirectly. 
 Now what can her intention be after her daugh- 
 ter is married, unless to avenge some injury, real 
 or imaginary, done to her by my letters, because 
 I wrote to her three letters, whereupon she went 
 to Mr. Mortimer and complained. I assure you 
 I have done absolutely nothing to offend or pain 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 71 
 
 her. What kind of a lady is she, one that will 
 be offended easily?" 
 
 "No, she is not that kind of a lady, but if you 
 think you have offended her I would advise you 
 to see her in person or write to her." 
 
 "Well, then, I will think of it and do my best. 
 Now that her daughters are married she cannot 
 possibly question my earnestness, as I can have 
 no self-interest in view." 
 
 "You are mistaken. Only one of her daugh- 
 ters is married. The old one is not married yet, 
 although she married once some ten years ago, 
 but she is no longer living with her husband. 
 She is a nice girl. You can marry her if you 
 like." 
 
 "How old is she?" 
 
 "Forty-one or forty-two years old." (My 
 senior by eight years.) 
 
 "Oh, it is impossible. The prospect was be- 
 tween me and her younger sister." 
 
 "Well, it is too late then. She is married 
 now." 
 
 We had so much talk about the two sisters, 
 all the time calling them "the older" or "the 
 younger one," and never by their names. Had 
 I asked them, or if he had mentioned them by 
 their names, this story would have never been 
 written. 
 
 "Is there a girl typewriter here?" 
 
 "Yes, we have one." 
 
 "Do you know why she meets me so often 
 while going to take my dinner, and other places 
 at other times?" 
 
72 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 "She has not been meeting you lately, has 
 she?" 
 
 Now this answer clearly shows that he was 
 aware of everything. She stopped it lately and 
 he knew of it, too. 
 
 "Not for the last few weeks, but she used to 
 meet me as often as every day in the week and 
 sometimes two or three times daily, except on 
 Sundays." 
 
 I bade him good-by and went home. 
 
 Sunday morning, January 27, after breakfast, 
 I went to my room. After a while Anthony 
 came in and said, "How did you find out that 
 she was married?" 
 
 "Yesterday morning, while going to ask Mrs. 
 Mortimer if she would introduce me to her I 
 saw the two sisters in front of the new build- 
 ing buying some groceries. Upon this I changed 
 my mind and did not go. At dinner time I 
 learned from Miss Callen that she was mar- 
 ried." I also told him of the conversation which 
 I had had with Mr. Cummings. 
 
 "Do you see any- signs of insanity in me?" 
 
 "Why, you are as sane as anybpdy that ever 
 came in contact with me. May I as|c you what 
 makes you put such a funny question' to me?" 
 
 "Now what kind of treatment do you call 
 this to which I have been subjected all this 
 while? It cannot be all imagination. Here is 
 the letter which I wrote about nine months ago 
 to Mrs. Hause, who took it to Mr. Mortimer and 
 made so much fuss about it. Read it and tell 
 me if there is anything wrong or offensive in it. 
 If so, tell me which part and in what way." 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement * 73 
 
 "I cannot see anything wrong," he said, after 
 reading it through. "On the contrary it is a 
 credit to any lady to be addressed in such a man- 
 ner as this. I can find ijo reasons whatever for 
 complaint nor understand why they should have 
 treated you in this way. But I would rather 
 have sent the letter to Miss Hause than to her 
 mother." 
 
 "I have always thought myself to be in the 
 right, or at least trying to do what seemed to be 
 right to the extent of my judgment and ability, 
 yet fearing lest my judgment be defective on 
 account of my being a foreigner and not having 
 been long in this country, I wanted to hear the 
 opinion of an American about the matter. Now 
 that you agree with me in declaring your impar- 
 tial opinion (to be sure about it I asked him if it 
 was his impartial opinion, and he said that it 
 was), that I have been right under the circum- 
 stances, then why should I worry about it or 
 even think of it?" 
 
 "Some day, no doubt, everything will come 
 out as it should." 
 
 I had a good dinner and a good supper. After 
 supper, Anthony, Dougherty and I, the three of 
 us, went to the M. E. Church. 
 
 "What do you think of marrying a widow," 
 asked Anthony, while walking towards the 
 church. 
 
 I immediately remembered how two days pre- 
 viously Mr. Cummings had told me to marry 
 her older sister, who was married once. They 
 all spoke the same thing. . 
 
 Widows and girls older than me will always 
 
74 iThe Inscrutable Woman 
 
 be kept out of my list of eligibles. I say this 
 boldly and without hesitation for the reason that 
 I cannot fall in love (marrying for love is un- 
 known among Martians), and consider marrying 
 for love a disgrace and degradation for a ra- 
 tional being. 
 
 The next day, Monday, I went to work at 
 eight o'clock in the morning. I had sat down 
 in front of my bench when I saw Mrs. Mortimer 
 going to the railroad station to leave the town. 
 Probably Anthony, to whom I had told how I 
 was going to see Mrs. Mortimer and why, had 
 told Mr. Mortimer or Mrs. Hause all about it, 
 so they sent her away. After a while both sis- 
 ters, whom I had not seen for over a month but 
 once, made their appearance in Center Street, 
 walking up and down, going in and coming out 
 of their store. They were to be seen there dur- 
 ing the greater part of the day. Cummings 
 Bros., more especially their typewriter, would 
 hardly go out of sight or keep still at the win- 
 dow of their office. After supper I told Anthony 
 of all this. 
 
 "It is strange that she should expose herself 
 like that instead of keeping out of sight until 
 you forgot her," he said. 
 
 "There is nothing to forget, nor does it make 
 any difference whether she hide herself from, 
 or expose to, my view ; they must have played 
 upon me some childish trick to amuse them- 
 selves. But I have not seen her yet in the com- 
 pany of her husband." 
 
 Three days after this talk, that is, Thursday, 
 January 31, I took a car in the morning to de- 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 75 
 
 liver a clock at St. Clair. On my way back I 
 saw her in a sleigh with her husband. I could 
 not see his face, as it was away from me, having 
 his head turned towards his wife. Later on I 
 saw her brother wearing a seal-skin cap and 
 clothing exactly alike to those of the man who 
 was in the sleigh with Jennie. It looked as if 
 she only had a sleigh ride with her brother; 
 nevertheless, it gave me the impression, as they 
 evidently intended, that he was her husband. 
 
 "I do not know where I got this quarter," 
 said Anthony, the next Saturday, holding a 
 spurious quarter in his hand, "I am going to 
 pass it this evening in the rush, so I shall be 
 unable to accompany you in your walk this 
 week," and he went to the market with Dough- 
 erty while I went to the opposite direction to 
 take my solitary walk. He did not have to come 
 with me any more because I knew now who 
 lived in the new building. 
 
 Late in the evening he came to my room, hold- 
 ing in his hand a bag of candy. "I bought ten 
 cents worth of candy with the quarter and got 
 fifteen cents change in good money," he said. 
 "Now help yourself," and put the bag on the 
 table. 
 
 From the first to the seventh of February I 
 saw her either alone or with her mother. On the 
 seventh day she met me in a sleigh with her 
 mother while I was going to Minersville to fix 
 a musical box. Well, I said to myself, after all 
 she does not seem to have married. I told all 
 this to Anthony and asked him what he thought 
 it meant? 
 
76 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 "Apparently," he said, "they are giving you 
 another chance; unless you take advantage of it 
 somebody is sure to snatch her from you." 
 
 While alone in my room I said to myself, An- 
 thany says he cannot do anything for me. Mrs. 
 Mortimer has left the town: The only thing that 
 I possibly can do is to write a note to Mrs. 
 Hause asking her if I could call on her and see 
 if she would be willing to introduce me to her 
 daughter. 
 
 In my previous letter, as the reader remem- 
 bers, I wrote to Mrs. Hause that she had been 
 trying to get acquainted with me, but since then 
 I had read the advice of Miss Beatrice Fairfax 
 that it was the gentleman's place to find a means 
 of introduction to a girl, and had listened to the 
 occasional remarks made by Anthony about a 
 girl in the neighborhood who was said to court 
 her lover, which was, for a girl, a very unnatural 
 thing to do, and that it was proper for the young 
 man to court his girl, etc., so I decided to make a 
 start from the opposite end by telling her that I 
 had been seeking the acquaintance of her daugh- 
 ter with a view to matrimony. 
 
 It seemed to me very unnatural to go from 
 introduction direct to matrimony without taking 
 the intervening steps. But I could draw from 
 their behavior, covering a period of two years 
 and a half, no other inference than that I was 
 expected to make a solemn promise to marry 
 her before I would be allowed to speak to her. 
 I further thought that I would still be at liberty 
 to refrain from marrying her in case I did not 
 like her. After all something was to be done in 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforccment 77 
 
 order to bring things to an end. So I wrote a 
 note asking leave to call on her the next Sat- 
 urday evening, and I received the following 
 answer : 
 
 "February 7, 1907. 
 "Mr. E. Baron: 
 
 "Dear Sir: It will be convenient to have you 
 call at 315 West Market Street this coming Sat- 
 urday evening at eight o'clock. 
 "Respectfully, 
 
 "Mrs. Frank Hause." 
 
 I went to their house at the appointed time. 
 Mrs. Hause opened the door, then led me to the 
 parlor and offered me a seat. Before I had time 
 to say anything to her, Miss Hause came in with 
 the dog. 
 
 "Do you object to her presence here?" asked 
 Mrs. Hause. 
 
 "No objection whatever," I said, "so much the 
 better." 
 
 "I desired to see you," I said, after a little talk 
 and turning towards Mrs. Hause, "for the ex- 
 press purpose of asking you to introduce me to 
 Miss Jennie, but you introduced me to her be- 
 fore I had a chance to speak to you, and then I 
 was going to ask you if her affection was en- 
 gaged by anybody," whereupon she laughed. 
 
 "It is my private affair," said Jennie, "and 
 concerns none but myself." 
 
 "I admit it is not proper for me to concern 
 myself in your private affairs," I said, "but," 
 turning to Mrs. Hause, "if her affection is not en- 
 
78 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 gaged by anybody I am going to ask her hand 
 in matrimony." 
 
 Upon this both of them burst into laughter. 
 
 "I was very much displeased with your let- 
 ter," began Jennie, "and when I took it, together 
 with my mother, to Mr. Mortimer, all the girls 
 in the store said that they could not believe you 
 wrote this letter, because they all thought you 
 were a woman hater. We said that you were 
 neither a woman hater nor a flirt, but a very re- 
 spectable young man. And Mr. Mortimer said 
 he would discharge you on account of the letter, 
 but for our intercession, asking him to excuse 
 you for this time. Even my brother became 
 very angry when he heard of it. Besides, you 
 write in your letter that I had been trying to get 
 acquainted with you. I cannot see how you 
 make that out. I never knew you until we got 
 your letter. Then I wanted to see you but did 
 not know how. Mr. Mortimer said that I could 
 see you if I would come to his store any day at 
 six o'clock in the evening. So I came to the 
 store one Thursday evening, together with my 
 sister Dorothy, who got married a few weeks 
 ago and has been living in that new building, 
 and saw you there for the first time." 
 
 This was a genuine lie, but ever since my ac- 
 quaintance with Anthony and Dougherty I had 
 constantly been told that all women were liars, 
 that their "No" meant "Yes." So I resolved to 
 swim with the stream instead of making hope- 
 less efforts against it. 
 
 "We had better leave the past alone," I said. 
 "I have been seeking your acquaintance." 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 79 
 
 "Why did you not find out which church I 
 went to and come to my church?" she asked. 
 
 Holy smoke! thought I. Is this what I have 
 been expected to do ? But how in the world can 
 one infer church-going from girl- talk, lewd pic- 
 tures, and obscene talk? However, I recalled to 
 mind one favorable circumstance, "We go to 
 church to see the girls," they had said, "other- 
 wise we have the Bible in our room." Evidently 
 I was expected to follow their example and go 
 to church to see her. 
 
 I did not go to her church for two reasons: 
 First, because I had never made anybody's ac- 
 quaintance through a church, and, second, be- 
 cause she was a brunette while I gave a decided 
 preference to blondes. I had mentioned this to 
 Anthony more than once. I would not go to her 
 church merely to see her but to get acquainted 
 with her. This I did not expect to accomplish 
 through the church. Having been convinced 
 that if after intimate acquaintance we should 
 find ourselves otherwise adapted to each other her 
 color alone could have no bearing upon the issue. 
 
 "I never thought of it," I said. "Which church 
 do you attend ?" 
 
 "Second Presbyterian Church," she said. 
 
 After a little talk I went home. 
 
 The next day I went to the Second Presby- 
 terian Church. After the service Mrs. Hause in- 
 troduced me to the pastor and a few of her ac- 
 quaintances. When I went home I told all to 
 Anthony. He congratulated me on my success 
 after such a long delay. In the evening I in- 
 tended to go to the same church agam, but 
 
8o The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 Anthony woald not consent to it, advising me to 
 wait until the next Sunday morning. I thought 
 he knew the custom of the country better, and 
 fearing lest I displease her again I took his ad- 
 vice and went to the M. E. Church with him. 
 
 On the following day at six o'clock in the 
 evening Anthony was waiting for me in the 
 sitting-room. 
 
 "How are you going to spend your evenings," 
 he asked, "as the Y. M. C. A. will be closed for 
 three weeks." (They were hard at work trying 
 to raise money for a new building.) 
 
 "Why, I can do some reading in my room," I 
 said. 
 
 "If you had made an arrangement with your 
 girl," he said, "you could call on her and spend 
 a few evenings with her." 
 
 "We made no appointment, and the best way 
 would be to wait until next Sunday morning, 
 when I shall have another chance of seeing her, 
 and try to make an appointment for the follow- 
 ing week." 
 
 "Two weeks is a very long time under the cir- 
 cumstances. I can see now the reason why it 
 took you two years and a half to get acquainted 
 with a girl. You are too slow, you see. You 
 leave everything entirely to the girl. You were 
 about to lose her altogether when with just a lit- 
 tle pluck or exertion you got acquainted with 
 her. You are still liable of losing her any time 
 unless you appear more active, take more inter- 
 est in her, and show more devotion to her." 
 
 "Well, is there anything that I can do?" 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 8i 
 
 "Why, write a letter expressive of a desire to 
 see her." 
 
 "I have had so much trouble for writing a let- 
 ter and you know it very well — I have told you 
 all — and do you still advise me to write an- 
 other?;' 
 
 "It is not proper to write to a lady whom one 
 has never met, but your case is quite different. 
 You have been properly introduced to her by 
 her mother and are, in consequence, entitled to 
 write." 
 
 "Will you write one for me ?" 
 
 After a minute's hesitation, "Yes, I will," he 
 said, "give me a piece of paper." 
 
 I gave him what he wanted and he wrote as 
 follows : 
 
 "Miss Jennie: 
 
 "If agreeable to you I would appreciate the 
 privilege of calling on you Wednesday evening. 
 
 "Very truly yours." 
 
 I copied this and mailed it to her but kept the 
 original and still have it. 
 
 The following day when I came home at six 
 o'clock P. M. the light in the sitting-room was 
 not burning. Anthony and Dougherty had gone 
 to their rooms. Everything looked dreary and 
 desolate. Before I opened the letter I forboded 
 some mischief to be imminent. It read as fol- 
 lows: 
 
 "Dear Sir: If you write any more letters I 
 
82 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 will put it in the hands of the officer and deal 
 accordingly. 
 
 (Signed) "Mrs. Frank Hause." 
 
 I went to supper with suppressed feelings; 
 they also came down and took their respective 
 seats at the table but neither of them opened his 
 mouth to utter a word ; the like had never hap- 
 pened before. 
 
 "There don't seem to be anything to talk about 
 this evening," I said, breaking the silence. "Bet- 
 ter talk of the weather," and I made a few re- 
 marks about it. I said nothing of the letter or 
 the contents of it. Evidently they expected to 
 see me angry or excited, but being disappointed 
 in their expectation they tried to provoke me in 
 another way. 
 
 "I never happened to know a man but you 
 who would give out his love affairs to strangers," 
 said Anthony in the presence of Dougherty, after 
 supper was over. 
 
 I understood every word of what he said, but 
 to make it sure I asked him if he would repeat 
 it. He repeated it and walked out, laughing, to 
 night school, and I went to my room. 
 
 What fools these people be by whom I have 
 been surrounded day and night! Woman's 
 whims seem to have no bounds. Each concession 
 opens but ways for new demands, increasing in 
 geometrical progression. I am quite sure An- 
 thony was advised by her to induce me to write 
 that letter. She seems to derive a sort of satis- 
 faction or pleasure from playing childish tricks 
 upon me. Who knows it may feed woman's"" 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 83 
 
 vanity! She shall not have her own way in a 
 matter that does not exclusively concern herself. 
 I will not debase myself for her daughter nor for 
 any girl in the world. It is mean and extremely 
 ridiculous to be a rational human being capable' 
 of speech, yet behave like an irrational animal. 
 Man has incomparably more important duties to 
 discharge in this world than waste his time and 
 use up his mental and physical energy in vain 
 efforts to unravel childish feminine tricks, cun- 
 ningly devised for cherishing vanity. I will go 
 from this town. Let her find a merry-andrew to 
 play hide-and-seek with. I am sick of it. 
 
 I wrote three letters containing advertisements 
 for a position. I mailed one of them to "Jew- 
 elers' Circular Weekly" in New York, another 
 to the "National Jeweler" of Chicago, and the 
 third one to "Keystone" in Philadelphia. 
 
 After night school was over Anthony came to 
 my room. I pretended to be jolly and in good 
 spirits, nor had I any reason not to be such. 
 Then Dougherty came in with a bag of candy, 
 apparently to cheer me up. After a little talk 
 Dougherty went to his room; Anthony did not 
 stay very long. "You seem to be very much in a 
 hurry," I said to Anthony as he was about to 
 leave my room. 
 
 "What is the use of staying late in your 
 room," he said, "when you are not in need of 
 being cheered up," and went to his room. 
 
 I made no mention to Anthony of the letters 
 which I had written for a position in order to see 
 the "show" which was sure to take place the next 
 day under the direction of Mrs. Hause. 
 
84 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 On the following day I went to work. Every- 
 thing was quiet. Nobody was to be seen at the 
 window of Cummings Bros.' office, the blinds 
 were pulled more than half way down. None of 
 those who were connected with the case would 
 expose himself or herself to my view. Mr. Mor- 
 timer said to Chapman that a new clock repairer 
 would soon come. In the afternoon I fixed a 
 clock and looked for the book to enter it in, but 
 it was novirhere to be found. I 'asked Mr. Mor- 
 timer about it. He said that he was going to 
 examine it because the clockwork did not seem 
 satisfactory, and, by implication, he was going to 
 lay me off as soon as the new man came. In the 
 evening I went to the reading-room of the Y. M. 
 C. A. The young man met me at the door go- 
 ing out of the building. 
 
 The same night I told Anthony about the ad- 
 vertisements for a position which I had sent to 
 three different papers, and how I was going to 
 give Mr. Mortimer a month's notice and leave 
 the town at the expiration of the time whether 
 I could obtain a position or not. 
 
 The next day Mr. Mortimer came to the fac- 
 tory. He was very jolly and in good humor, 
 and looked extremely friendly towards me. "I 
 found the clockwork satisfactory," he said, "and 
 a boy is coming from Bethlehem to assist the 
 jeweler." Thus everything seemed changed. 
 The typewriter began to expose herself at the 
 window. She met me on my way to dinner, in 
 fact she kept on meeting me until I left the town. 
 Jennie, her brother and the dog passed many a 
 time up and down Center Street, and the young 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 85 
 
 man at the Y. M. C. A. was not defective in his 
 exhibition of friendly feeling towards me. 
 Everything and everybody appeared friendly to 
 me, but my final decision was given not to be 
 fooled and debased any longer. 
 
 Friday, February 15, after dinner I gave Mr. 
 Mortimer one month's notice. Anthony, Dough- 
 erty, Mr. Mortimer, and the rest did their best, 
 directly or indirectly, to induce me to stay but all 
 in vain. 
 
 On the following Sunday morning while I was 
 going to church together with Anthony she met 
 me right in front of her church. I had been, by 
 this time, in the town for about three years, but 
 had never met her while going to church. It 
 seemed as if prearranged so as to meet me. 
 "Good morning, Mr. Baron," she said. I tipped 
 my hat and said good morning to her, but did not 
 follow her to the church, though I may have been 
 expected so to do. I went to the M. E. Church 
 with Anthony. 
 
 In the evening Anthony took me to Dough- 
 erty's room, after a little talk he took the "Sci- 
 ence of Nature" and began to read in that part 
 where it says "Unless the husband loves his wife 
 passionately no healthy offspring can be expected 
 from their union." 
 
 What has the health of the children to do with 
 the love of the father or even the parents? Can 
 love be transformed and appear in the offspring 
 in the form of health? Can flesh, bone, and 
 sinew be made out of feelings, emotion or pas- 
 sion? Impossible, it is the health of the parents 
 that is transmitted as such, while love can only 
 
86 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 appear as love in the children. This is no other 
 than the same old doctrine of the conservation of 
 energy. Parents cannot use up their health, 
 strength and energy under the excuse of intense 
 love towards each other and yet be capable to 
 transmit it to their progeny. Of parents of equal 
 health the least affectionate couple beget the 
 healthiest children. This is a simple physiolog- 
 ical fact. Many examples can be adduced in 
 proof of this. The following are a few from the 
 Bible which is within easy reach of all : 
 
 1. * Jacob was cheated into marrying Leah, 
 whom he did not love; nevertheless the descend- 
 ants of the two sons, Levi and Judas, out of the 
 four born of her, cut the most prominent figure 
 in the history of the Hebrews. All the priests, 
 judges, learned and cultured element were de- 
 scended from Levi, while Judeans early showed 
 their pre-eminence both in respect to number and 
 extent of territory occupied by them. Jesus also 
 descended from Judas, born of the unloved wife 
 of Jacob. 
 
 2. tTwo nations, Moabites and Ammonites, 
 were descended from Moab and Ben-ami, born 
 of an incestuous union between an intoxicated 
 father and his two daughters. 
 
 3. tHosea could not have very well loved the 
 whore whom he married by the command of 
 God and became the father of two sons. 
 
 4. Nor much love could have existed be- 
 tween a man and his deceased brother's widow, 
 leaving no son, whom he had to marry. To con- 
 
 * Gen. xxix., 29. t Gen, xix., 36. t Hosea, i., 3. 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 87 
 
 sider such loveless marriages as at the expense 
 of the health of the offspring is entirely unwar- 
 ranted. 
 
 When consideration is given to the art of 
 breeding animals it will be found that breeders 
 in their system of selection attach not the least 
 importance to the love or attraction that may ex- 
 ist between the parents. In cross-breeding not 
 only love is entirely wanting, but there is, in the 
 majority of cases, a decided repugnance to pair, 
 nevertheless the offspring of a first-cross between 
 distinct species frequently possess very desirable 
 qualities, but their sterility prevents the forma- 
 tion of a new race. There exists a natural re- 
 pugnance between the ass and the mare to pair, 
 the crossing of them is accomplished by human 
 ingenuity. 
 
 It is against nature's law, common sense, and 
 every-day experience to ascribe any magical ef- 
 fect to love over the destiny of the offspring. 
 
 "Why does she (Mrs. Hause) speak so many 
 lies?" I asked Anthony one day, while talking 
 about his favorite subject. 
 
 "Why, you have been trying to understand 
 women," he said. "Have you ever seen a man 
 who could understand women? We never can, 
 they are inscrutable." 
 
 I hesitated for a while, could give no answer 
 to it. This was something entirely new to me. 
 Such a statement I had never heard or thought 
 of nor given any consideration to it. I began to 
 think it over in my mind. Women can under- 
 stand men but not men women, why? Are 
 women more intelligent than men? Impossible. 
 
88 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 It is an acknowledged fact, confirmed beyond the 
 possibility of doubt, both historically and physio- 
 logically, that women are inferior to men intel- 
 lectually. To say that woman can understand 
 men without being understood by them, at least 
 to the same degree, is equivalent of saying that 
 the less intelligent can understand the more intel- 
 ligent the better. Carrying the analogy a few 
 steps further we might just as well say that the 
 animals understand us still better and the brute 
 creation the best, which is absurd, consequently, 
 inscrutableness, if this can be predicated of 
 women, must be due, as the only conceivable al- 
 ternative, to their mendacity, slyness and trick- 
 ishness, in contrast to the veracity, honesty, and 
 frankness of men. 
 
 "When I am told that a man fails to under- 
 stand a woman," I said, turning to Anthony, "I 
 can give but two explanations — either he is a 
 fool or she is mendacious, cunning and deceit- 
 ful. In the first case I do not wonder at all; in 
 the second she is not worthy of being under- 
 stood; she is the most worthless creature. This 
 reasoning, by a reversion of the terms, holds 
 good when a woman cannot understand a man. 
 It is their most sacred duty to explain themselves 
 so either of them can understand the other." 
 
 Women, evidently, have heard of a species of 
 inscrutability predicated of them, but those who 
 have comprehended the exact meaning of it con- 
 stitute a very small minority. It may occur, as 
 it frequently does, that each member of a couple 
 takes a liking, in their everyday life, to a differ- 
 ent calling, otherwise happy and well adapted to 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 89 
 
 each other. The husband may have an extraor- 
 dinary interest in poHtics, be devoted to his club 
 to an unusual degree, or so engrossed with the 
 acquisition of wealth that he cannot be induced 
 to relax. On the other hand, the wife may be 
 devoted to music, religion, or the management of 
 household affairs. In such a case the wife con- 
 siders her husband a mammonite; she cannot 
 understand how a human being can waste his life 
 and energy in the pursuit of what she considers 
 dross. While the husband regards his wife's 
 likings or pursuits as too puerile and fanciful, un- 
 worthy of devotion and serious consideration. 
 This is an innocent inscrutability that may exist 
 between a husband and his wife. But to speak 
 thousands of lies and play as many tricks upon 
 a man, and then consider oneself inscrutable and 
 boastful of it, indicates the extreme depravity of 
 the agent. When a woman says that she under- 
 stands a certain man, she invariably means that 
 he loves her. Oh, what a great honor it is to be 
 loved! Women only seem to know the exact 
 value of it. But if love really means what they 
 made me to understand in this country, the 
 women of the street should be the happiest in the 
 world. 
 
 Mention has already been made of true hap- 
 piness which one ought to find in the rational, 
 divine love, whereby one loves and can account 
 for it. The vain and the fool or the vain fool 
 find happiness in being loved. 
 
 When I had but one more week to stay, Mr. 
 Mortimer called Wilcoxon, one of the watch- 
 makers, down to his office. After a long talk he 
 
90 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 came up to me and said that Mr. Mortimer 
 wished I would stay with him as he was very- 
 much satisfied with my work. I said that I could 
 not stay any longer, that it was my private af- 
 fairs which compelled me to go. He said he was 
 very, very sorry and left me. 
 
 Monday, March i8, 1907, I left P and 
 
 came to N , where I had obtained a position 
 
 through my advertisements. I immediately be- 
 gan to work for Mr. Tapken, my new employer. 
 My bench was between that of the engraver, 
 Charles Wolpert, who also repaired jewelry, and 
 that of the assistant jeweler, William Henry. 
 There were two watchmakers, Alfred Pierson 
 and Edwin Dawson, and an all-around man in 
 the store. 
 
 Anthony had told me to write to him from 
 
 N , so I wrote a letter to him on the twentieth 
 
 day of March. It was mostly about the city and 
 my work. I got the answer on the twenty-fourth 
 of the same month. We exchanged letters for 
 the second time, but there was nothing special 
 in them, only that he had seen the girl twice, 
 once while sitting at the window reading, and the 
 other while going to church with her mother. 
 
 On the thirty-first day of March a piano agent 
 representing John Wanamaker in New York, 
 together with his wife, rented the room opposite 
 mine. They began to take their meals in the 
 boarding-house where I had been taking my 
 meals. At first they were at a different table, 
 but within a day or two they managed to take 
 the two seats next to mine, Mrs. Percy sitting 
 between her husband and me. 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 91 
 
 Mr. Percy frequently made remarks about love 
 or being in love, matrimony, grass-widow and 
 grasshopper. (It was a witty anecdote or some 
 analogy, so far as I remember.) He Would leave 
 the table first and go, probably to attend to busi- 
 ness, while Mrs. Percy would leave the table im- 
 mediately after me and seemed very anxious to 
 walk with me going home. Next Sunday after 
 breakfast I was reading my paper and the rest 
 were getting ready to go to church. She had 
 changed her dress and was standing near the 
 door of my room. "I am a Congregationalist," 
 she said. "I am not going to church because 
 there is no Congregational Church in this town." 
 Then turning towards me, "Mr. Baron, you are 
 not going to church, are you?" she added. 
 
 I belong to the Congregational Church, so did 
 my parents. This I had mentioned to Anthony. 
 Whether she really belonged to the same church 
 or was merely advised to say so is hard to tell, 
 yet it does not alter the case. "I usually go to 
 the church where there is the best music," I said, 
 offering her at the same time my paper to read. 
 She hesitated at first and then took it. I went to 
 church. After dinner I came to my room and 
 commenced to read my paper again. After a 
 little while Mr. and Mrs. Percy came, went into 
 their room and locked the door. After about an 
 hour, while I was still reading, they opened the 
 door and came out of their roorn, husband and 
 wife, with their night dresses on, and stood in 
 front of me. The constant girl-talk, etc., of An- 
 thony and Dougherty, were not so bad as this. 
 I thought that I had merely jumped out of the 
 
^2 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 frying-pan to fall in the fire. Such a sight could 
 not but excite my aversion toward them. From 
 that day on I began to keep my door closed and 
 shun their company. After a hasty breakfast 
 and dinner I would go to work, and after supper 
 to the public library. I gave them no chance to 
 speak with me, nor have anything to do with me. 
 By this time I received a letter from Miss Callen 
 stating that Anthony and Dougherty talked of 
 
 girls no more since I left P , nor went to the 
 
 church but in the evenings. 
 
 Mr. and Mrs. Percy failed to accomplish their 
 mission, because I shunned their company, and 
 paid no attention to them. Whereupon the em- 
 ployees of Mr. Tapken took up the case. 
 
 Pierson and Dawson, the two watchmakers, 
 one Monday noon, just before dinner, Mr. Tap- 
 ken having been in New York City, brought a 
 few drawings of their own make, representing 
 both sexes anatomically, and laid it upon my 
 bench. Pierson said that he was a married man' 
 and, consequently, experienced; Dawson that he 
 was engaged to marry and was very much in 
 need to know, and that I was old enough to 
 know, etc. I wonder how they came to know 
 that I did not know those things. I had not been 
 with them for quite a month yet, it being hardly 
 sufficient to get acquainted with each other. 
 
 Wolpert ha^ a blue-print — the most obscene 
 drawing imaginable. He would draw a scene 
 upon the paper covering my bench during my 
 absence. I objected time and again that it was 
 improper, unchaste, immoral, that no good could 
 possibly come out of it. But they kept on doing 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 93 
 
 this week after week, telling me, at the same 
 time, that I was a heart-smasher, that I had left 
 
 the girl * in P with a broken heart, that I 
 
 was stubborn, unwilling to come to terms, etc., 
 while Percy began to meet me quite often on 
 my way to work. Sometimes, "How do you do," 
 he would say to me, other times he would turn 
 his face away from me and pass by without ut- 
 tering a word. His wife would treat me in the 
 same way. In the store the employees of Mr. 
 Tapken kept on their lewd talk and obscene 
 drawings. Wolpert said he had a letter, com- 
 plete in every way, that it was in his room, he 
 would bring it down to the store ; all I had to do 
 was merely sign my name to it and mail to her ; 
 everything would be all right, that it was too bad 
 
 for me to look for a girl in N , while my girl 
 
 was waiting for me, etc. Decoration Day was 
 near. They all said that it was a good chance 
 
 *One day Wolpert asked me if I were married. I 
 answered naturally in the negative. Thereupon he 
 
 said that there were many pretty girls in N , and 
 
 that it would not be very long before I would be 
 trapped by one of them. And Henry said that he 
 had two sisters, and was going to speak to them about 
 me. Whereupon I told them not to disturb the girls, 
 as I had one already; that one girl was enough for 
 anyone who did have no trouble. 
 
 I had never said such a thing in my life. This was, 
 no doubt, the result of my association with Anthony 
 and Dougherty. But I said nothing more — no name, 
 no address, no particulars ; just a girl, that was all. 
 Nevertheless, it proved to be a sufficient foundation 
 for the Inscrutable Woman to build the highest sky- 
 scraper upon it, ^§ will be evident by what is to fol- 
 low. 
 
94 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 for me to go and see my girl, how she would be 
 glad. I told them to stop and let me alone, but 
 they did not listen to me. The more I objected 
 the more they did. I thought I was in the most 
 abominable spot in the world. They made me 
 exceedingly uneasy, in fact, beyond endurance. 
 What made it the more aggravating was to think 
 and feel sure that all this was being done at the 
 instigation of a woman. I was at a loss as to 
 what to do. To resign my position and go some- 
 where else? I could not afford to change my 
 position so often, and she could follow me no 
 matter where I went. The only way that I could 
 think of was to see each other and come to an 
 understanding. But what if she pretended total 
 ignorance of the matter? Yet hoping the result 
 to be no worse than what it was, I resolved to 
 make another attempt for meeting her. 
 
 "Have you ever been in P ?" I asked 
 
 Percy, calling him to my room one Sunday. 
 
 "I have never been there." 
 
 "Do you know anybody there, or are you in 
 communication with anyone residing there?" 
 
 "I do not know a soul there." 
 
 "There had been some kind of understanding 
 or better call it misunderstanding, between me 
 and a girl. I was obliged to leave the town on 
 
 that account and come to N ; here I have 
 
 ' een pursued again. I have always thought you 
 ^vere connected with the party in question, either 
 directly or indirectly. Even the employees of 
 Mr. Tapken seem to be advised to treat me in a 
 very unnatural and objectionable way, which an- 
 noys me exceedingly." 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 95 
 
 "I know absolutely nothing about the matter." 
 
 No help of any kind was coming from him in 
 this way. On the following day I went to his 
 room, and, "Did you have any trouble with your 
 wife before you married her?" I asked him. 
 
 "Lots of it. One can hardly find a young man 
 who did not have some kind of trouble or other 
 with his wife before he married her. That's 
 the time one hears more lies than during the rest 
 of all his life, and more tricks are played upon 
 him than he could ever have suspected. The 
 girl will aim at finding out the weak point of 
 the young man in order to make her assault upon 
 that point with concentrated energy. Nothing 
 pleases her more than to see him stumble and 
 fall." 
 
 I was wondering if all this could be true. 
 Encomiums would seem to be pouring upon the 
 head of women like April showers. I knew 
 absolutely nothing yet of others coming from B. 
 Shaw, A. Schopenhauer, D. Hume, E. Kant, 
 the "Hardened Benedict," F. Nietzsche, etc., in- 
 deed it is hard to find one among the philoso- 
 phers with the exception of M. Conte who 
 speaks in laudatory terms of women. On the 
 other hand poets, with but few exceptions, 
 would seem to feel uneasy if they failed to find 
 enough words to sing the excellencies and per- 
 fections of the fair sex. This seeming incon- 
 sistency, however, can easily be accounted for 
 when consideration is given to the fact that 
 philosophers depict the woman as she is now, 
 here; among us, as she is actually found in 
 every-day life, while poets as she should be or as 
 
96 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 their ideal of a woman is. She may exist in 
 some part of the universe, or on this planet of 
 ours in a remote future, but for us she has no 
 practical value. 
 
 "Girls are very funny creatures," he added; 
 "you don't seem to know them yet, but you will 
 soon learn when you meet one of them." 
 
 "What would you advise me to do?" 
 
 "Write a letter." 
 
 I wondered if the Inscrutable .Woman had been 
 making a collection of letters in order to have a 
 "Letter- Writer" published ! Every one of her 
 agents advised me to write a letter. 
 
 "Do not speak of writing any letters, because 
 all this worry and trouble is the result of a very 
 short letter. How would it be if I go there in 
 person on Decoration Day?" 
 
 "It would be better than writing a letter." 
 
 "Which one shall I see — the mother or the 
 daughter ?" 
 
 "You will have to see the daughter. The 
 mother has nothing to do with the case. We 
 shall leave here next Wednesday for New York," 
 he added. 
 
 I left him and went into my room. 
 
 "Winning a wife," "Wooing a girl," are 
 phrases, I said to myself, much in use in this 
 country. I wonder if the worth of a woman is 
 measured by the extent of the sacrifice which 
 a man makes in gaining her consent in marriage ? 
 Can a fifty-dollar counterfeit bill be good for 
 its face value, just because a certain laborer has 
 worked for it, say, a whole month ? Or would a 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 97 
 
 genuine bill lose its value if found, and not 
 labored for? 
 
 The husband of a worthless wife will ever 
 grudge the time, the energy, he spent, the sacri- 
 fices he made, and the privations he underwent 
 on her account. On the other hand, the man 
 whose matrimonial solicitations to a worthy wo- 
 man meet with a readiness of compliance, con- 
 siders himself, and justly so, very fortunate, and 
 praises her the more for not subjecting him to 
 unnecessary troubles. We should look where 
 true worth is to be found. A worthy woman 
 has it within herself. All our anxiety and trouble 
 taken, and energy spent for her, do not add to, 
 but, on the contratry, detract from, her worth. 
 Matrimony is nothing more than a simple alliance 
 formed between a man and a woman on equal 
 terms, with a view to accomplishing a certain 
 end. Winning of a wife or husband is non- 
 sense. But one swallow does not make spring. 
 The journey which I intend to make may be 
 considered a commendable sacrifice on my part 
 made for her sake. So let me try to abide by 
 the paralyzing corruptions of custom, and thus 
 fulfil the requirements of the convention, the 
 blind monster, cruel and exacting. 
 
 On Decoration Day I went to P . I rang 
 
 the bell of their house. Mrs. Hause opened the 
 door, and, leading me into the parlor, gave me a 
 seat. 
 
 "I hear you have left P . Is that true ?" 
 
 She had over a dozen people around me, and 
 yet she only heard of my departure from P . 
 
 "Yes, I did." 
 
98 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 "Where did you go?" 
 
 "To N . (Although "To hades"_ would 
 
 have been a better answer to her question, for 
 pretending to be in total ignorance about it.) 
 
 "What kind of a place is N ?" 
 
 "It is an old city, a little larger than P , 
 
 having a population of about twenty-four thou- 
 sand. I came here to ask you if I could see Miss 
 Hause and have a talk with her." 
 
 "No, it is impossible." 
 
 "All right; if it is impossible, let it be so." 
 
 "Did you see Mr. Mortimer ?" 
 
 "No, not yet." 
 
 "Go and see him, then. There are friends in 
 the house to-day, so I shall not be able to speak 
 with you any longer." 
 
 I left her, and went out to see Mr. Mortimer. 
 
 Mr. Mortimer was my old employer in P . 
 
 She wanted me to see him. I thought it could 
 not be for anything else than to tell him that I 
 was willing to come back and resume work, so 
 we could attend to the settlement of the other 
 problem in order. I' said this to Mr. Mortimer, 
 but he said that he had a clock repairer, and 
 consequently had no position open for me. We 
 had about half an hour's talk, but he said noth- 
 ing about her. I came back to N , knowing 
 
 no more about the case than before. Three days 
 after this — that is, the following Sunday — I went 
 
 to P in the hope of meeting her in church 
 
 and speaking to her, remembering how about 
 three months ago she had expressed her desire 
 that I should go to her church. But she had not 
 gone to the church that morning ; probably Percy 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 99 
 
 informed her of my departure over the telephone. 
 I came back without being able to accomplish 
 anything. There was absolutely no chance of 
 speaking to her so we • could understand each 
 other. In N they had been teasing and pro- 
 voking and treating me in an objectionable way. 
 I felt myself helpless between two flames — un- 
 certainty in P , abuse and insult in N . 
 
 My nerves were strung to their utmost capacity. 
 I was in such a condition when I wrote a letter 
 to Mrs. Hause, asking her for an explanation of 
 all that she had done, within a week ; upon failure 
 to get an answer during the specified time, I 
 
 would resign my position and go to P . I did 
 
 not write to her of the proceeding I intended to 
 take, which was to consult a lawyer with a view 
 to taking the case to court, and thus try to bring 
 things to a head. 
 
 The next day I went to work. "Why, you 
 don't look well. I wonder what ails you?" said 
 Wolpert to me. 
 
 "I am going to give a week's notice, quit my 
 
 work at the end of the week, and go to P to 
 
 consult a lawyer." 
 
 "Under the circumstances, you cannot afford 
 to lose your position and wages, pay^a lawyer's 
 fee and other expenses which are bound to be 
 very heavy for you. You will simply ruin your 
 future by spending your hard-earned savings. I 
 would advise you to give it up and attend to your 
 
 business. I will not let you go to P any 
 
 more." 
 
 I thought that he was right. I could not 
 afford to carry on my project without incurring 
 
100 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 great damage to my future. I would be but too 
 
 glad to stay in N , look after my business if I 
 
 were only left alone, undisturbed and unmolested. 
 
 "I know a mean, rich woman," said Wolpert, 
 next Wednesday, "so mean, so inhuman, indeed, 
 beyond description. She gave me so much 
 trouble, that if a robber should break in her 
 house and murder her, upon his being caught by 
 the authorities and tried for murder, I would 
 sicquit him if I were in the jury-box. What do 
 you think of this?' 
 
 There never had been a more childish question 
 put to me.. How could I know what he meant 
 by trouble? I simply said that if all the jurors 
 were no better than he, they would soon fill the 
 country with robbers and murderers. 
 
 "Don't you think women are intellectually in- 
 ferior to men?" he asked me, after a little pause. 
 
 The Inscrutable Woman seemed, at this time, to 
 have been fully convinced that I was in love, 
 hopelessly and helplessly, and that she had 
 brought me to this "state of bliss" through her 
 ingenuity. Was not this a sufficient disproof of 
 her childishness and intellectual inferiority to 
 man which I had predicated of her? 
 
 "It is the general opinion," I said, "because the 
 average weight of a woman's brain is less by 
 about ten ounces than that of a man. This is a 
 physiological proof. Then it has been said that 
 no woman has as yet originated a system of 
 philosophy or an ethical treatise. In art, science, 
 literature and inventions they have been and still 
 are far behind men." 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement loi 
 
 "I think so, too. Oh, I hate women. I never 
 like to wait upon them." 
 
 In the first place, there is almost an impass- 
 able gulf between a discussion of woman's intel- 
 lectual inferiority to man, due to some natural 
 cause or causes and hatred of them; and, sec- 
 ondly, he says he hates women in general, and yet 
 was engaged to one of them with a view to 
 speedy marriage. All this, and what is to fol- 
 low, clearly shows that he was only a tool in 
 the hands of the Inscrutable Woman, who stood, 
 so far, self-confessed, deserving my hatred yet 
 quite confident of the final victory of her scheme 
 after repeated failures. 
 
 Heroic feats are commonplace occurrences, and 
 the final success of the hero is certain when they 
 depend upon the caprice of the novelist; but in 
 actual life they are exceedingly rare. I had 
 thought quite differently, had despised the end,- 
 however desirable, so long as it had mendacity, 
 tricks and deception for its fneans. I pitied her 
 for her immorality and extreme ignorance, when 
 she had leisure and the chance to know better. 
 
 Everything went- on all right until Saturday. 
 All the afternoon of that day Wolpert spoke or 
 made questions about the town P , Mr. Mor- 
 timer, his employees, his store, etc. "Do you go 
 
 to see Mr. Mortimer when you go to P ?" he 
 
 asked me, at about six o'clock in the evening. 
 
 "Yes, I always do, because he has told me to 
 call on him any time I happened to be there." 
 
 "It is going to be a very nice day to-morrow," 
 said he, in the evening, just before going home, 
 
i02 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 pointing me to the skies ; "indeed, the right one to 
 go to P- 
 
 This was clearly a hint to me to go to P- 
 
 and see Mr. Mortimer. Mrs. Hause also had 
 told me nine days ago to see him. So I made 
 up my mind to go once more for the last time 
 and see Mr. Mortimer for the express purpose 
 of speaking of her. 
 
 The next day I went to P- . I found Mr. 
 
 Mortimer in his house. "Why am I not allowed 
 to see that girl ?" I asked him, as soon as I seated 
 myself opposite and close to him. 
 
 "What girl do you mean?" 
 
 "I mean Jennie, the younger daughter of Mrs. 
 Hause." 
 
 "But you_ are mistaken. In the first place, 
 she is the elder of the two; and, secondly, she 
 is engaged, and expects to marry within a month 
 or two. Both sisters were married and divorced. 
 But the young one, Dorothy, re-married about 
 five months ago, and has been living in the new 
 building." 
 
 "Well, what has rhe been trying to do, then? 
 And the Cummings Bros., their stenographer, a 
 young man in the Y. M. C. A., two school teach- 
 ers in my boarding house, and many others?" 
 
 "It must be all imagination." 
 
 "Hold on a little. I went to their house on the 
 ninth of February. I asked Mrs. Hause, in the 
 presence of Jennie, if the affection of her daugh- 
 ter were engaged by anybody. She laughed at 
 this, while Jennie said that it was her personal 
 affair that concerned herself alone ; but I pressed 
 my inquiry further, saying that it would be all 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 103 
 
 right if it was so ; if not, I was going to ask her 
 hand in matrimony ; whereupon both laughed to- 
 gether. After a while Jennie asked me why I did 
 not find out which church she went, and go to her 
 church. I said I never thought of it. Then I 
 asked her which church she went to, and she told 
 me. The following day I went to -her church, 
 and her mother introduced me to the minister 
 and others of her acquaintance. If this is not 
 encouragement, then I do not know what it is. 
 As to the last letter that resulted in so much 
 worry and trouble, Anthony wrote and induced 
 me to mail it to her, and I have no doubt An- 
 thony has been acting upon Mrs. Hause's advice, 
 either directly or indirectly." 
 
 "Did he write the letter ?" 
 
 "Certainly; I mailed her a duplicate of it, and 
 kept the original. I still have it. At this he 
 frowned, pressed his lips close together, and 
 shook his head. The sudden change which the 
 expression of his countenance underwent was a 
 clear indication that he did not approve of it. 
 
 "After I left here and went to N ," I added, 
 
 "Miss Callen wrote to me stating that Anthony 
 and Dougherty ceased going to church Sunday 
 mornings, and also talking about the girls. Be- 
 sides, she has a man with his wife in N , 
 
 rooming and boarding in the same house where I 
 do. And it was upon the hint of the engraver 
 of Mr. Tapken that I came here to see you. 
 You cannot very well dare to call all this imagi- 
 nation, without standing in doubt of my sanity. 
 This is the fourth time I have come to you about 
 this subject. You never told me that she was 
 
104 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 the eldest in the family, or that she was married 
 and divorced, or even that she was engaged to 
 marry. I do not think that I have been treated 
 right by these people." 
 
 "Well, now, Baron, you do not know this 
 country yet well enough, because you have not 
 been here long. People in this country believe 
 the lie of a woman, but not the truth of a man. 
 Rich people do what they like. One has no right, 
 unless he has money. Have you been reading 
 about the Thaw case? He shot and killed Stan- 
 ford White. Everybody knows he is a mur- 
 derer, yet no jury in this country can convict 
 him, just because he is rich. Now, Jennie and 
 her would-be husband are both rich. He is a 
 very desperate man, too. If he hears all about 
 this he will immediately put you in jail. Life is 
 too short. Forget everything." 
 
 How cowardly, how cowardly, to try repeat- 
 edly to scare me into submission to what I shall 
 call an ignorant woman's caprice, like a little ill- 
 fated child who is now and then threatened by 
 his ignorant mother to be thrown out of the win- 
 dow , of a seven-story building for misbehaving 
 himself (say for chewing his food with the right 
 jaw, in spite of his mother's order to use the left 
 one, in which the poor child has toothache), this 
 would be more illustrative of the case in hand. 
 And if the proper administration of Justice in 
 this country is to be inferred from the very case 
 he referred to, I do not hesitate to say that there 
 is justice in this country. His millions could not 
 restore him his liberty, and at the end he was 
 committed tq an asylum. 
 
Cupid Gets Re-enforcement 105 
 
 When I was about to leave him he said : "Write 
 
 to me when you go to N ." I thought he 
 
 simply wanted to know if I could forget her, and 
 did not worry about her any more, so I said, "All 
 right, I will," and left him. 
 
 I went to the Misses Callens. There I met 
 Anthony and Dougherty, but told them absolutely 
 nothing about the girl or the interview which 
 I had with Mr. Mortimer. I had already written 
 in one of my letters to Anthony of my resolu- 
 tion not to speak or write of her any more. This 
 resolution I never broke, nor have I been sorry 
 for it. He had been of no use to me. Taking 
 advantage of my strict truthfulness, he would 
 put all kinds of questions to me, eliciting none 
 but true answers, and impart all to the other 
 party; on the other hand, he would not hesi- 
 tate to tell a hundred lies for some trivial self- 
 interest, or even just for the fun of it. No stigma 
 seems to be attached to a lie any more. 
 
 After supper I got ready to leave the town. 
 Anthony and Dougherty accompanied me to the 
 railroad station. The train being delayed some 
 thirty-five minutes, I told them not to wait for 
 me, but they did not listen to me. At last the 
 train came into the station. "Now I believe this 
 will be our last meeting," I said. "I will come 
 to this town no more, unless some unexpected 
 event compels me to." 
 
 "No, you will spend your vacation here," they 
 said, both together. 
 
 This was quite a surprise to me. I wondered 
 what made them say that I was going to spend 
 my vacation here. Was it because I was in love 
 
io6 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 and would prefer to spend it in the vicinity of 
 the object of my love? Then what to say of 
 Mr. Mortimer's "Write to me" ? Does he think 
 me to be in love, expecting me to write that I 
 could not forget her, and that I would very much 
 
 like to come back to P ? 
 
 We shook hands and parted. I came home 
 at eleven forty-five P. M. The light of the room 
 occupied by Mr. and Mrs. Percy was burning. 
 At twelve o'clock I turned off my light, being 
 ready to go to sleep, and ten minutes later they 
 turned off theirs. 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 107 
 
 CHAPTER III. 
 
 cupid's "not guilty" unavailing. 
 
 "Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned, 
 Nor hell a fury like a woman scorned." 
 
 Monday morning I went to the store calm and 
 quiet, and began to work. The storm was over. 
 I felt as relieved of some heavy burden. It 
 seemed as if I had been running for about three 
 years after a shadow, or striving to clasp a 
 spectre which melts at mortal's touch. Now 
 everything was clear to me. There was no more 
 any mystery about the matter. A divorced wo- 
 man of forty-one, my senior by eight years, had 
 been trying to attain an impossible end by childish 
 means. She had left no stone unturned within 
 her reach, in order to enslave me to passion and 
 make me blindly jump into the sea of matri- 
 mony preferably to a river. ("You will marry 
 her if you do not commit suicide.") 
 
 I did not know as yet, nor could I believe it 
 possible to exist, among the wealthy and promi- 
 nent population of one of the most civilized 
 countries who have leisure to know better, such 
 women as would endeavor to degrade the very 
 young man whom they intend to marry to the 
 rank of an animal, instead of elevating him to the 
 highest stage of which a rational human being 
 is capable. I am unable to understand how a 
 
io8 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 reasonable woman, or one possessed of common 
 sense, can prefer one enslaved to passion to one 
 who is a "slave to the reason"-^an uncommon 
 expression — for the reason that man implies a be- 
 ing subject to the dictates of reason. Reason is 
 the divine element in us, the human characteris- 
 tic, the only attribute which discriminates man 
 from the animals, and by means of which he 
 reigns over brute creation. Acts committed with- 
 out the guidance of reason are unmoral. If mat- 
 rimony is a moral institution, which most cer- 
 tainly it is, it should be entered upon rational 
 grounds, otherwise it will be an immoral act, 
 or, at best, unmoral. 
 
 "Shall I take you to a woman at Burnet 
 Street?" said Wolpert. "I know her very well." 
 
 "Why, what makes you say that to me ?" I de- 
 manded. 
 
 "Because you are in love." 
 
 I wonder how did he come to know that I was 
 in love, notwithstanding the fact that to be in 
 
 love is unmeaning for me. I went to P on 
 
 Sunday morning, and came back the same day 
 in the evening. I had absolutely said nothing to 
 anybody, yet they seemed to know not merely 
 where, but, what is stranger still, why I went. 
 Nothing was further from my mind, nay, a pro- 
 posal on her part would have met but a prompt 
 refusal. 
 
 The word "love," as it is used here, seems to 
 carry the most popular meaning among many 
 others which it appears to have in the English 
 language. This was my last lesson; I have not 
 been able to add any more to my vocabulary. 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 109 
 
 People marry for love; they go to a disorderly 
 house for love; adultery and fornication is mak- 
 ing love, only with the epithet "free" prefixed. 
 They go to church and kneel in prayer to ex- 
 press their love to God; ministers and teachers 
 enjoin upon them to entertain love toward their 
 parents, brothers, sisters, home country, human- 
 ity, etc., etc., and also God is love. 
 
 In order to punish, reward or bestow a gift 
 upon one, his presence is required, while a curse 
 may be expressed or an anathema thundered at 
 him in his absence. For love (sexual), in order 
 to attain its end, the presence of the object is 
 indispensable; but for love (emotional), its ab- 
 sence is no hindrance; we can love our dead 
 mother, etc. The first is an act or a tendency to 
 act, having exclusive reference to one of the 
 opposite sex. The second is a feeling, an ab- 
 stract sentiment. There is a great deal of dif- 
 ference between the two. They are to be ex- 
 pressed by two different words ; nor is there any 
 need for coining a new word, as there are two 
 already — love and lust — conveying the two des- 
 ignations required. (It is so in our language.) 
 Love implying our emotions of respect or ten- 
 derness towards God or our fellow-creatures, 
 and lust a pathological agitation directed to the 
 opposite sex. After drawing a line of demar- 
 kation between the meanings of the two words, 
 and assigning them to their respective scope, 
 it becomes evident that marrying for love is 
 impossible, and justly so. Matrimony can be 
 contracted either from lust or duty. From the 
 former by all who are on the same level with 
 
no The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 the animals or degrade themselves to the same 
 stage in conjugal affairs; from the latter by the 
 highly developed man, both intellectually and 
 morally — the philosophers, moralists and sages 
 of all ages. 
 
 Love cannot be left entirely out of account. 
 A man and a woman may love each other, as 
 they often do, or ryen they are morally en- 
 joined to love each other; but love and matri- 
 mony have nothing in common. Our love to our 
 father, brothers, sisters, friends, etc., never sug- 
 gests matrimony. The sun has light and heat; 
 both fall on the snow. But it is the heat that 
 melts the snow, and not the light. In like man- 
 ner it is the lust and not love that leads people 
 into matrimony. I am aware there is an odium 
 attached to the word "lust," or the meaning it 
 conveys. That odium is not to be detached from 
 the word; on the contrary, fastened to it more 
 securely. It may be asked, if matrimony for 
 love is unmeaning, and for lust I attach a stigma 
 to it, do I then declare against matrimony? By 
 no means; not against it, but its motive. I will 
 substitute as a true motive, duty in place of 
 lust, this being the motive for irrational animals. 
 Indeed, it will be urged, as it has ever been, 
 that the sexual appetite is an innate yearning, a 
 God-given impulse; it is so natural as to be 
 almost impossible to speak lightly of it. We 
 cannot, nay, ought not to, resist this demand of 
 nature, and even put a premium upon it as the 
 only means of perpetuation of self, etc. 
 
 Advocates of simple naturalism will be more 
 consistent with their doctrine if they would go 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing iii 
 
 to a butcher's shop to take their meals than a 
 restaurant. "Natural" has different meanings 
 for different classes of beings. It is natural for 
 unsupported bodies to obey the law of inertia, 
 for vegetables to respond to stimulation, for 
 animals to respond to impulse, for rational be- 
 ings to obey, the dictates or the guidance of 
 reason. Impulse in animals is followed by ac- 
 tion; in man, deliberation, judgment, choice and 
 voilition intervene between impulse and action. 
 We have feelings, desires, emotions, passions. 
 Love is one of them, lust another; a hking to 
 robbery, murder, rapine, etc., are others, in- 
 herited from our remote animal-like ancestors. 
 All are natural impulses, directed to its specific 
 object. It is given to reason to refrain from 
 some, to yield to others, and give preference 
 to the most worthy as judged by the conse- 
 quences of the act upon self and others, now and 
 in the future. 
 
 Our aggressive desires or tendencies have 
 been checked by various means — legislation, re- 
 ligious dogmas, public opinion, etc. — with good 
 results; but with respect to the sexual impulse 
 now, the systematic repression or regulation of 
 it has been enjoined or simply recommended, 
 now full indulgence allowed by nations or foun- 
 ders of religions. The Christian doctrine, as 
 propounded by Christ was very strict, calling the 
 eye of lust to account with the adulterer. But 
 during the nineteenth and twentieth centuries a 
 change has occurred. A premium has been put 
 upon its indulgence throughout the civilized na- 
 tions, owing mainly to the influence of the im- 
 
112 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 moral doctrines promulgated by a number of 
 moralists like Bentham, Mill, Oustin, Spencer, 
 Schiller, Dewey, Prof. James, etc., making 
 pleasure or happiness, under the name of He- 
 donism, Eudemonisni, Utilitarianism, Evolution- 
 ism, Pragmatism, and what not, the principle of 
 moral action. And what is more pleasurable to 
 animal nature than sexual indulgence? Wo- 
 men are very anxious to be loved because it is 
 pleasing to their weak nature and appeals well 
 to their vanity; men like to give full play to 
 their lust for like reasons ; moralists enjoin it as 
 a principle of moral action ; public opinion coun- 
 tenances, and the hotbeds of vice (modern 
 theatres) provide for the required stimulation. 
 All in accord have given to lust — a vice — the 
 name "love" — a virtue — Shaving been well con- 
 vinced for two centuries that by a mere change 
 of name the act as well as the tendency to it may 
 be sanctified; thus the civilized countries are 
 overflowing with love. The long-looked- for mil- 
 lennium, it would seem, has arrived after all. 
 
 One hesitates to say to an American, "Love 
 your neighbor." According to the law of asso- 
 ciation, he invariably pictures in his imagination 
 his neighbor's wife or daughter; because the 
 word "love," as it is used in this country ninety- 
 nine times out of a hundred, implies sexual in- 
 dulgence. How long is this blind impulse to rule 
 
 over usr 
 
 ? 
 
 The main reason as to why the sexual im- 
 pulses have always proved the least amenable 
 to discipline is because it relates to a want which 
 offers the greatest opening for sophistry. But 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 113 
 
 it should not be forgotten that when conjugal 
 intercourse is restricted exclusively to propa- 
 gation, the number will be reduced to such a 
 small figure as to be altogether insignificant, the 
 balance having no end as to justify the indul- 
 gence. Some have named as an end "the satis- 
 faction of the sexual appetite, in analogy to our 
 appetite for food, as if it subserved life in 
 like manner that the latter does. But this is an 
 error for the reason that the former has always 
 proved injurious to the health of the organism. 
 Two persons of equal health and means, taking 
 equal nourishment, etc!; supposing one of them 
 married and the other remained single, the latter 
 invariably lives longer and preserves his health 
 the better. Breeders of animals well know this. 
 They will not keep the sexes together. There 
 is every reason to do away with sexual indul- 
 gence except for the purpose of propagation, 
 which, as was said above, is altogether insigni- 
 ficant. Indeed, it is our duty so to do, if we 
 consider ourselves, as we should, morally bound 
 to preserve and prolong our life to its utmost 
 extent. Is it possible? Certainly. Numerous 
 examples may be cited to show that all those 
 who are incapable of thought, reflection, judg- 
 ment, deliberation, who are in total ignorance 
 as to the order of the universe, to whom a talk 
 of duty is a jargon, speaking physiologically, 
 whose cerebral activity is in the minimum, the 
 energy is naturally directed to the lower ex- 
 tremity and transformed into irresistible sexual 
 impulse. Nature takes utmost care for the 
 preservation of the species. To this end ani- 
 
114 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 mals and ignorant people are impelled to matri- 
 mony blindly under the lash of the sexual ap- 
 petite. Children born of such parents are not 
 provided for with education, general culture, or 
 the means of a good start in life. They find 
 themselves engrossed with earning a mere live- 
 lihood while yet in their teens. They can do 
 no better than follow the parents and meet the 
 same fate. 
 
 Returning to the parents, as soon as passion 
 subsides, the bond of matrimony is practically 
 sundered. Should contracting parties be of 
 means, they keep the divorce court busy; if not, 
 a daily quarrel takes the place of the family 
 prayer. The number of dissatisfied marriages 
 can only be ascertained by giving both husband 
 and wife full liberty to forsake each other at 
 pleasure. Should this be allowed, more than 
 seventy-five per cent, love or lust marriages 
 would dissolve; a very ominous fact. After the 
 lust, the law compels them to keep the matri- 
 monial contract inviolable. 
 
 There are others, a very rare class, who make 
 proper use of their brains. They keep the men- 
 tal and moral faculties in full activity. Such an 
 one does not become enslaved to the sexual im- 
 , pulse. Its demand for satisfaction is not felt 
 as a thing irresistible. He marries from the 
 duty of self-perpetuation, transmits his good 
 character and habits to his offspring, setting be- 
 fore him a good example, and giving him a good 
 education, this being his main object for enter- 
 ing into the matrimonial state. World's progress 
 in all the departments of life would be very 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 115, 
 
 rapid if all children were born of such dutiful 
 parents, even though they had less love or none 
 at all. 
 
 The true philosopher is the man who uses 
 the faculties of his mind, so far as it lies in his 
 power, to their utmost capacity, having for ob- 
 ject of speculation or contemplation the intel- 
 lectual and moral order of the universe. Leav- 
 ing the Middle Age mystics out of account, we 
 have had a number of philosophers — Rene Des- 
 cartes, Nicholas Malebranche, Benedict de Spi- 
 noza, Francis Bacon, John Locke, David Hume, 
 George Berkeley, Thomas, Hobbes, Wilhelm 
 Leibnitz, Emmanuel Kant, Friedrich Hegel, Au- 
 gust Comte, Arthur Schopenhauer, Herbert 
 Spencer, and I will add also the anarchist philo- 
 sopher Friedrich Nietzsche, one of the most dar- 
 ing thinkers. 
 
 These are the leading philosophers. Each of 
 them may be said, except Nietzsche, to have de- 
 veloped a system of philosophy quite independ- 
 ent of the rest. They are, in the main, origina- 
 tors in contrast to those who have been rather 
 imitators or followers of a system already pro- 
 pounded. 
 
 What strikes one, first of all, is the fact that 
 the above list is composed almost entirely of 
 bachelors. Bacon made an unsuccessful attempt 
 to marry a wealthy widow because he was in 
 debt. Hagel married at forty-one — a duty, not 
 a love or lust match. Comte made a mess of 
 it, and was obliged to live separate from his 
 wife. Thus the leading philosophers, the most 
 intelligent men of the world, lived a single life. 
 
1 1 6 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 This clearly confirms that brain activity is op- 
 posed to the sexual impulse. Women nowadays 
 are averse to marry the man who does not "ele- 
 vate" himself to the rank of an irrational animal. 
 A philosopher cannot possibly degrade himself 
 to that stage, and prefers a single life — the lesser 
 of the two evils. 
 
 Socrates, Plato, Aristotle, the Greek philoso- 
 phers, were married because they lived in an 
 age, though backward in many ways, neverthe- 
 less "the half-brutal and half-childish chivalry" 
 did not prevail among them, when marrying a 
 woman was hardly different, and even much 
 easier, than the hiring of a maid or a nurse is at 
 the present., It was not necessary to "strain the 
 gnat and swallow the camel" in order to be able 
 to win a girl in matrimonv. 
 
 Nations advance in special directions; the 
 progress in one line is often accompanied by 
 backwardness in some other. Each nation has 
 its excellencies and defects. The motive of mat- 
 rimony as is being sought for in this country 
 and in most of the civilized countries, marks the 
 lowest stage, their being no room for a single 
 retrograde step to take. There is no irrational 
 animal that does not marry or pair for sexual 
 love. This state of affairs is to be considered 
 either a retrogression, or no advance or im- 
 provement upon brute nature in this particular 
 direction. I am far from saying that anything 
 prevalent among the animals is improper or even 
 immoral for man, but simply that all impulse or 
 desire is to be brought under the censorship of 
 the reason, as befitting a rational man. 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 117 
 
 To cite the views of all the philosophers con- 
 cerning the problem in hand will be superfluous, 
 and take more space than can reasonably be 
 given. I shall adduce none but those of A. 
 Comte's, who was the only enthusiastic defender 
 and stanch champion of womankind among the 
 philosophers. To feminine love he attributed 
 the highest moral value, elevating the woman to 
 the rank of the deity on account of the ascend- 
 ency of her affective element. Yet is it not 
 strange that he could not get along with one of 
 the goddesses — his wife — and was obliged to 
 leave her? 
 
 That by "love" Comte never meant the sexual 
 love is very clear from the fact that he con- 
 sidered it a disease, a species of human frailty 
 of which man is to be cured and restrict the re- 
 productive function exclusively to women. He 
 devoutly wished and believed in the probability 
 of the virgin motherhood in the future. (See 
 "System of Positive Polity," vol. IV, pp. 60, 
 242-3, 251, etc.) 
 
 Evidently Comte refers to some other species 
 of love. There is the love of benevolence, of 
 amity, of sympathy, of motherhood, etc. All 
 these are closely allied to one another. To ma- 
 ternal love is given a prominent place among the 
 affections ; its purity and disinterestedness have 
 been chanted in verse and prose. But what of 
 its moral value? Here is a typical description 
 of maternal love as felt by a mother: 
 
 "As soon as a wife becomes a mother, her 
 whole thought and feeling, her whole being, is 
 
1 1 8 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 altered. Until then she had only thought of 
 her well-being, of the satisfaction of her vanity; 
 the whole world appeared only for her; every- 
 thing that went on about her was only noticed 
 so far as it had personal reference to herself; 
 she asked of everyone that he should appear in- 
 terested in her, pay her the requisite attention, 
 and as far as possible fulfil her wishes. Now, 
 however, the center of the world is no longer 
 herself, but her child. She does not think of 
 her own hunger; she must first be sure that 
 the child is fed. It is nothing to her that she 
 herself is tired and needs rest, so long as she 
 sees that the child's sleep is not disturbed; the 
 moment it stirs, she awakes, though far stronger 
 noises fail to arouse her now. . . . Every 
 limb of the still hideous little being appears to 
 her beautiful; every movement fills her with de- 
 light. She has, in one word, transferred her 
 entire egoism to the child, and lives only in it. 
 Thus, at least, it is in all unspoiled, naturally- 
 bred mothers, who, alas ! seem to be growing 
 rarer ; and thus it is with animal mothers. . . . 
 She does not herself know why she is so happy, 
 and why the look of the child and the care of 
 it are so agreeable, any more than the young 
 man can give an account of why he loves a 
 maiden, and is so happy when she is near." 
 
 Here is another by the same mother : 
 
 "The maternal joys of a cat, for example, are 
 not to be disguised. With an expression of in- 
 finite comfort, she stretches out her fore-legs to 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 119 
 
 offer her teats to her children, and moves her 
 tail with delight when the little hungry mouths 
 tug and suck. . . ." 
 
 The latter, as it is evident, is the description 
 of a mother-cat's maternal love. Now, what is 
 the difference between the two? So far as their 
 affection is concerned, neither of them has any 
 superiority over the other; both are on the same 
 level. The sight of maternal love tends to ex- 
 cite in us aesthetic emotions ; it is beautiful to 
 look upon it, but has no moral value. A woman, 
 however, is valued incomparably higher than a 
 cat, and if this universally acknowledged supe- 
 riority is not due to her affection, we must look 
 for some other attribute of hers to account for 
 it. 
 
 When we see a mother chastising her child for 
 some disobedience, waywardness or misbe- 
 havior, we attach great importance to the act 
 as having moral value, assigning, in the mean- 
 while, the agent a higher position among the 
 creatures. Here lies her superiority to a cat. 
 A cat is all love; she never punishes her kittens, 
 no matter how naughty they become. A kitten 
 grows spontaneously to a normal cat. Her ways 
 in life are marked out quite definitely for her 
 by nature, but not so for a child; advice, educa- 
 tion, punishments, etc., are corrective means to 
 the child's realization of himself of what an 
 ideal human being should be. These correc- 
 tives as applied to children do not imply love in 
 the agent, but intellect. A woman's or man's 
 superiority is not due to her maternal or his 
 
I20 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 paternal, nor even to any other kind of love 
 which they may possess, but to the intelligence, 
 by virtue of which proper means are devised to 
 gain the worthiest and noblest ends. 
 
 Such "mothers, alas! seem to be growing 
 
 rarer," wails Mrs. S . She grieves at what 
 
 she should rejoice. Mothers such as she de- 
 scribes are unfit to bring up their own children, 
 and should hand over the duty to a more im- 
 partial guardian, in whom the sense of equitable 
 judgment is not disturbed, and the love of right 
 is proof against the cowardice of sympathetic in- 
 dulgence. 
 
 We give our vote to the most intelligent candi- 
 date for president, governor, mayor, judge, etc., 
 but never inquire as to his affections. Imagine a 
 mother seated on a magisterial chair; justice 
 goes to the wall. How worthless maternal love 
 is, but for irrational animals for the care of 
 offspring and consequent preservation of the 
 species ; and for human beings on the same level 
 with them who are ignorant of the moral duty 
 enjoined upon them by the author of the uni- 
 verse. Intelligence builds nurseries or estab- 
 lishes foundling hospitals to bring up children. 
 If well managed, the absence of the maternal 
 love is never felt; it enacts laws and compels 
 undutiful parents to care for their children. In- 
 tellect does love's work infinitely better, but the 
 latter can never do that of the former. 
 
 Comte at first instituted the worship of hu- 
 manity after endeavoring to get rid of the 
 deities, metaphysical entities, and the Christian 
 God as the mere products of imagination. But 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 121 
 
 humanity is no better than a metaphysical en- 
 tity, indeed, it is a nonentity apart from the 
 individual. The worship of women was an ad- 
 dition as 'something palpable or visible. Comte 
 regarded this addition as a new discovery, a 
 happy hit, an improvement on the old institu- 
 tions contributive to the elevation and purifica- 
 tion of the morals in general. In reality, this 
 was a retrograde step and would have been 
 more obvious if he had taken another step in the 
 same direction by the institution of the worship 
 of the domestic dog on account of the predomi- 
 nance of its affective element. Dogs are known 
 to starve themselves upon the grave of their 
 masters from grief. Can a wife or mother 
 show, or is it possible to reveal a higher degree 
 of affection? But the worship of the dog as 
 well as that of other animals had centuries ago 
 been practiced by the Egyptians and other na- 
 tions; and the number of the goddesses exceeds 
 that of the gods in the treatises on myths. Even 
 in our own time female figures are employed in 
 the production of art. Were there more women 
 artists than men, the use of the male figures 
 would increase, and justly so, because the latter 
 is superior in more than one way to the former, 
 as is invariably the case among the animals. 
 And if antiquity had women as founders of re- 
 ligions, more gods than goddesses would be met 
 with in their systems of myths. This simply 
 shows the higher valuation which either sex 
 puts upon the other consequent on mutual path- 
 ologic attraction. 
 
 If there is anything in man worthy of wor- 
 
122 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 ship it is the reason. Take away part of the 
 love of a cat and give it a Httle intelligence, 
 and it becomes a woman ; take more of its affec- 
 tion and add more intelligence, it becomes a 
 man. Deprive it of all love but endow with per- 
 fect intelligence and it becomes god as he is 
 imagined by us to be. Our ideal, most perfect 
 being (God), if deprived of all intelligence, and 
 by implication, of wisdom and justice, becomes 
 no higher than an animal, no mater how much 
 blind love he may possess. 
 
 The Greeks gave Juno to Jupiter. The other 
 deities had one or more wives. Impotency in a 
 god was considered by them a defect. But we 
 Christians no more predicate sexual love of our 
 God, nay to do so we regard a profanity to His 
 holiness, a deficiency in Him. Why not in man 
 as well as in woman? But still we ascribe to 
 our God some kind of paternal love, because 
 He watches, with the most perfect composure, 
 the burial of thousands of human beings under 
 the hot ashes of a volcano, and also the gradual 
 starvation of tens of thousands of others dur- 
 ing periods of famine, instead of saving them, 
 of which He is believed to be capable. 
 
 The time shall come when no love of any kind 
 will be attributed to God or our most perfect 
 ideal being. Love of every kind is a frailty, an 
 imperfection, a disease in human nature; even 
 the love of benevolence, charity, sympathy. 
 (See pages 265-274.) It will be the age of 
 moral duty, duty to father, mother, brother, sis- 
 ter and humanity. Love to God will be super- 
 seded by an emotion of admiration mingled with 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 123 
 
 awe entertained towards the universe, its un- 
 known cause or author, infinity of time and 
 space, and our departed ones. 
 
 Here is a young man kneeling before a young 
 lady making vows and declarations often under 
 a solemn oath. What has he to say ? Let us listen 
 to him for a minute. 
 
 "I will do all in my power to make you the 
 happiest woman in the world. I will make you 
 the queen of our home. I will give my heart to 
 your keeping. Love me and the world is mine," 
 etc. 
 
 This is an open revolt against God's will as 
 expressed in the order of nature. Ay, it is a 
 crime to expect from matrimony what God did 
 not ordain. Let us look for a while over the 
 sentient creation. Procreation implies sacrifice 
 of the parents ; self-sacrifice, either entire or in 
 part. In some lower orders the mother dies on 
 the same instant that her young comes into life, 
 and serves it for food; indeed, some die even 
 before it gams consciousness. Whence does 
 man derive his idea of loving, being loved, hap- 
 piness, pleasure, a kingdom to rule over, etc. 
 No wonder marriages prove failures, when im- 
 possibilities are expected. What right has a man 
 or woman to expect to be loved by the other? 
 What right to expect to be happy, have a good 
 time, enjoy life the more pleasantly, the one to 
 have a heart to rule in, the other exclusive pos- 
 session of a human being, as if she were a piece 
 of property or furniture? For the woman mat- 
 rimony involves martyrdom, self-sacrifice; for 
 the man becoming a slave, a provider, a servant, 
 
124 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 a caretaker, in order to perpetuate themselves 
 in their offspring. This is equivalent of saying 
 to give up part if not all of their, pleasure, hap- 
 piness, freedom and leisure. But a new kind of 
 pleasure, a true happiness attends the discharge 
 of duty. It is as impossible to attain pleasure 
 or happiness as it is to possess a certain color 
 without the object that has the color. True hap- 
 piness accompanies the discharge of duty: false 
 happiness the satisfaction of whims. I have 
 never experienced a feeling of disappointment 
 for failure to possess the moon, for the reason 
 that I never expected to. But little children do 
 and cry for it. 
 
 When matrimony is contracted with the right 
 end in view — duty, sacrifice, martyrdom for off- 
 spring as ordained by God, and not like little 
 children, for sport, fun, pleasure, or the vanity 
 of ruling, and the satisfaction of a diseased 
 craving-love of any kind, passive or active, then 
 it will be as impossible for matrimony to prove 
 a failure as for a body to disobey the law of 
 inertia. 
 
 Dawson brought a newspaper clipping, "Why 
 men do not marry their first love." It was 
 passed over to me and I read it. Two or three 
 days later Pierson brought another one which 
 read as follows : "It is of no use for a girl to 
 run after a young man when his love wanes, 
 and cares for her no more." This also was 
 given 'to me and I read it. 
 
 I received at this time a postal card from my 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 125 
 
 sister in Egypt, addressed care W. H. Morti- 
 mer. 
 
 Mr. Tapken fixed the date of my vacation. I 
 regarded the girl subject all over when I re- 
 ceived a letter from Anthony telling me that it 
 was "roasting hot," and in consequence he had 
 laid the girl problem aside, but when fall came 
 he was going to look for one. 
 
 This made me uneasy, because this was a 
 hint at what they had been planning to do next 
 fall. He had done the very same thing many a 
 time before; nor was I mistaken. There were 
 troubles in store for me, troubles incomparably 
 greater than the ones I had before. 
 
 I wrote my promised letter to Mr. Mortimer, 
 stating that I had found it easy to forget every- 
 thing as he had advised me to do, and that I 
 was going to spend my vacation in New York, 
 and also that I expected to be let alone; and if 
 she did not keep away from me trouble would 
 be inevitable. 
 
 She seemed to have considered me madly in 
 love, and according to the general opinion in this 
 country a lover's lie, oath, threatenings, etc., 
 could not be taken seriously. But she was mis- 
 taken. I was not in love, nor do I know what 
 it is to be in love. When a Martian young man 
 falls in love, that is, loses his head about a girl, 
 or merely exhibits more devotion to her than 
 reasonably can be expected, his neighbors im- 
 mediately begin to make inquiries about his 
 father, mother, grandfather, grandmother, etc., 
 in order to locate the origin of the insanity; if 
 not traceable in one of hi? ancestors then it is 
 
126 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 declared to have originated in him. Such a 
 young man is liable to meet the refusal of the 
 girl, while in this country no young man can 
 err in loving his girl to excess. To fall in love 
 among us is a very rare occurrence. In this 
 country they fall in love mainly for two reason? : 
 First, to please the woman, for whom love is 
 life, life never ending, pursuit of vanity,, and 
 vanity feeds on love; second, to conform to the 
 requirements of the public opinion based upon 
 the ravings — the superstructure of brute-nature 
 — of the eccentric poets. 
 
 Percy and his wife, who had told me that 
 they would leave the city the night before Deco- 
 ration Day, did not do so until two weeks after 
 Decoration Day. Before he went away he ad- 
 vised me again and again to take out my natu- 
 ralization papers. 
 
 I spent my vacation in New York and en- 
 joyed it very much. When I came back I found 
 in the boarding house an Episcopalian minister, 
 Dr. David Guillon, an Englishman, and his wife, 
 rooming and boarding there. Dr. Guillon, as a 
 rule, would precede, and his wife would fol- 
 low me to breakfast. On seeing his wife com- 
 ing to the dining-room he would immediately 
 rise from his seat, pull her chair out so she 
 could sit on it; after this he would be seated 
 again and say to his wife, "Oh, what a joy, what 
 a joy, you brought to me, my dear." He kept 
 on doing this for some time and then began to 
 say the same thing to me. "Oh, what a joy, 
 what a joy you brought to me; how glad I am 
 to see you." This was his third remark at the 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 1:27 
 
 breakfast table. The first one naturally was 
 "Good morning," the second, "How did you 
 sleep last night?" 
 
 "I do not see any reason why you should be so 
 glad to see me," I said to him one day. 
 
 "Because I like to see happy, smiling faces." 
 
 "Foreigners, as a rule, do not have happy or 
 smiling faces." 
 
 "You are not a foreigner, you are an Amer- 
 ican. Ignorant and uneducated people are the 
 foreigners." 
 
 "Foreigner simply means a man living in a 
 country where he is not born, having absolutely 
 no reference to his education or other qualifica- 
 tions whatever." 
 
 To this he made no answer. One Sunday at 
 dinner time he complained that the best part of 
 the chicken was given to me while he only had 
 • some bone and gristle. He left the boarding 
 house on account of that, taking a room close to 
 his church. He stayed there until he left the 
 city. He had already said to me that he had a 
 church in New York and was only having a 
 vacation. 
 
 As soon as he left the boarding house he sent 
 the fountain of his joy to New York City. 
 
 He called me once to his room and we had a 
 long talk together. Among many other things 
 he wanted to know where I had been in Eng- 
 land, and I said to him that I had been about 
 three months in London and eighteen months 
 in Grays, Essex. This was a good bit of in- 
 formation for her, now that it would seem she 
 had aimed at writing my biography. In the 
 
128 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 end he advised me to take my naturalization 
 papers, as Percy had done before. The em- 
 ployees of Mr. Tapken also seemed very anxious 
 that I should take my citizenship papers. 
 
 "Americans," they said, "will feel very proud 
 to have a well-educated young man like you 
 added to their number." 
 
 In the meantime a young man had occupied 
 the room next to mine. He would not go to bed 
 until I went. I had set my alarm clock so as to 
 go off at five forty-five A. M. As soon as it went 
 off in the morning he would jump out of bed, 
 making a loud noise. He would go out of his 
 room at six fifteen if I got up out of my bed 
 right away; otherwise he would wait for me, no 
 matter how long he had to, and then go out. 
 
 Dr. Guillon's daily "Good morning" would be 
 followed, as was said above, by "How did you 
 sleep last night," so regularly as to make one 
 think that they were inseparable. 
 
 Wolpert, in the meanwhile, began to tell me 
 of his experiences while dancing with the girls 
 in the evening, and the feelings thereby excited. 
 This was merely prefatory to his purpose that 
 was to follow, namely, the reducement of his 
 experiences to questions and put them to me, 
 coming at the end to the conclusion that nobody 
 would believe a young man of my age who, be- 
 ing neither married nor going to disorderly 
 houses, could live a pure life, that anyone could 
 tell from my hand and face that I had been 
 mistreating myself, and end his talk by advising 
 me to see a specialist before it was too late. 
 
 Wolpert professed himself to be a good Chris- 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 129 
 
 tian; he believed in the Bible. He would reject 
 modern "heretical", interpretation of it. If he 
 had read his Bible he would have found in it 
 mentioned one hundred and forty-four thousand 
 men who "Are they which were not defiled with 
 women because they are virgins, and in their 
 mouth there was found no lie." (Rev. XIV, 4.) 
 Jesus, John, Paul and many others were un- 
 married. The Bible contains numerous recom- 
 mendations of genuine and pure celibacy. 
 (Matt. XIX, 2. Luke XX, 35. i Cor. VII, 
 1-2 and 25-40. I Thess. IV, 3. John III, 3. 
 Virginity is the perfect state, a divine, heavenly, 
 angelic virtue; marriage as an expedient to 
 avoid greater evil, only a makeshift for the 
 weak. 
 
 In the public library, where I used to go every 
 evening after supper, there was a young man 
 
 like the one at the Y. M. C. A. in P , who 
 
 took a seat oposite to me at the same table, 
 which was left, it would seem, for our exclu- 
 sive use, because the number of the readers 
 seldom exceeded that of the tables. He passed 
 the greater part of the time in sleeping. 
 
 Thus she arranged everything in such a way 
 as to have one of her men in close proximity 
 to me day and night. Can a man live such a 
 life? Have I nothing else but to think of her? 
 What right, what excuse she had to compel my 
 attention constantly in a certain direction? This 
 is worse than slavery. 
 
 "Why do you not speak of your girl any 
 more?" said Wolpert one day. 
 
 "In the first place, when did I ever speak of 
 
130 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 my girl? In the second place, I have no girl. If 
 
 you mean the one in P , Mr. Mortimer said 
 
 to me that she was engaged to marry soon." 
 
 "Why don't you go and win her back ?" 
 
 "I don't care, and if you make any more 
 questions of her you will get no answer." 
 
 "The next day he began to sing the following 
 song, the rest of the employees chiming with 
 him. "And you know you're not forgotten by 
 the girl you can't forget, and the girl you left 
 behind is waiting for you yet." He changed, 
 many a time, some of the words and sang in this 
 way, "Baron, you know you're not forgotten by 
 the girl you can't forget, and the girl you left 
 in P is waiting for you yet." 
 
 It was in the last week of August that Wol- 
 pert and some of the other employees of Mr. 
 Tapken drew my attention to the folowing ad- 
 vertisement in the "Jewelers' Circular": "First 
 class clock repairer wanted, one who can assist 
 with plain watch repairing. W., 1106, care 
 'Jewelers' Circular Weekly.' " I looked at it, 
 there was Mr. Mortimer's initial. I was a "first 
 class clock repairer," and used to assist with 
 watches while working for him. Apparently he 
 wanted me back again, while only about two 
 months ago he had told me that he already had 
 a clock repairer and there was no position open 
 for me. However, I paid no attention to the 
 advertisement, although it appeared in the same 
 paper for about two months and a half succes- 
 sively. 
 
 "I shall go to New York to-morrow, together 
 with some of my friends to have a good time," 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 131 
 
 said Wolpert one day, "and I know how in- 
 quisitive Miss Hall (the lady who conducted 
 the boarding house) is. She will invariably in- 
 quire of me; when she does, tell her that you 
 do not know where I went." 
 
 "Do you know where Charles has gone?" 
 asked Miss Hall the next morning, while taking 
 my breakfast. 
 
 "Yes, I know, but he told me not to tell you 
 where he went. I suppose you will have to 
 wait until he comes so you can ask him about 
 it." 
 
 "Well, r don't care," she said. 
 
 I went to the store at eight o'clock; two hours 
 later Wolpert came from New York. 
 
 "Did Miss Hall ask you about my where- 
 abouts?" he inquired. 
 
 "Yes, and I told her that I knew but was ad- 
 vised by you not to tell her," I said. 
 
 Wolpert could hardly conceal his surprise at 
 my giving such an answer. "If you had not 'told 
 me where you would go," I added, "my answer, 
 naturally, to Miss Hall's question would have 
 been, I do not know. I did not ask you to tell 
 me where you intended to go. Why did you 
 tell me about your going to New York and then 
 advise me to tell Miss Hall that I did not know? 
 What kind of a lie do you call this, white or 
 conventional ?" 
 
 "Thene is but one kind of lie," he said, "and 
 that is a damned black lie." 
 
 "Then you are a damned black liar," I said 
 to him. He gave no answer, but I regretted my 
 hastily-drawn conclusion as it was liable to ex- 
 
132 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 cite ill-will towards me, without doing any good 
 by way of inciting him to an habitual truthful- 
 ness. But I soon discovered my mistake. To 
 be called a liar did not imply a charge of dis- 
 honor to him. Upon another occasion he spoke 
 a lie but soon confessed it to" be such, where- 
 upon I asked him, "Why do you speak so many 
 lies, Charles?" 
 
 "Don't you think Americans are clever?" he 
 said. 
 
 To this I gave no answer. Such a cynical 
 reply was enough' to silence anybody. 
 
 I did not know as yet that this was a deep- 
 laid scheme on the part of the Inscrutable 
 Woman to make me tell a lie, or to habituate me 
 to it. This will be clear by what is to follow 
 next. 
 
 "Did you get your pay?" asked Wolpert one 
 Saturday morning. (We were paid every Sat- 
 urday morning.) 
 
 "No, not yet," I said. 
 
 "I got mine," he said. "I got mine, too," said 
 Henry. 
 
 A few minutes later Mr. Tapken came in and 
 paid us all. 
 
 "Why, you said to me that you were paid 
 before. What did you mean by it?" I de- 
 manded. 
 
 "We only meant our last week's pay," they 
 said together. 
 
 I took it simply for a harmless joke and 
 laughed a little. 
 
 "Did you get your pay?" they asked nie the 
 next Saturday again. 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 133' 
 
 "Yes," I said, remembering the joke of the 
 preceding week. 
 
 "We got ours, too," they said, exposing the 
 money to my view, but hardly a minute passed 
 when Pierson (Mr. Tapken being absent) paid 
 me but not the rest, having paid them before 
 in my absence. Upon seeing this, "You're a 
 liar," they exclaimed, triumphantly, "because 
 you said you had your pay while you did not 
 have it." 
 
 "I meant my last week's pay," I said, remind- 
 ing them, at the same time, how they had played 
 the same joke on me the previous Saturday. 
 But they would not listen to my expostulations; 
 they said I was a liar. 
 
 A few days later a man came to the store and 
 asked Mr. Tapken if his clock was ready. Mr. 
 Tapken stepped in and said, "Did I tell a he or 
 the truth, when I told the man that you were 
 working at it?" 
 
 "No," I said, "this clock does not belong to 
 that man." 
 
 Mr. Tapken went out, while Henry said, "Not 
 only you are a liar, but you made Mr. Tapken 
 a liar, too. Now, had you been repairing that 
 man's clock Mr. Tapken would have told the 
 truth." 
 
 This remark is too childish and absurd to need 
 any comment, so I pass it by. Whereas, Wol- 
 pert said that "good natured, simple-minded 
 Americans make a joke and you take it seriously; 
 and call it a lie." 
 
 The summary of all this is quite clear. I was 
 given a sufficient number of examples to show; 
 
134 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 that everybody tells a lie once in a while, that 
 there are harmless, aye, useful lies. Mr. Tap- 
 ken told a lie, so did Wolpert, Henry, and the 
 rest, even I was caught in it. Mr. Mortimer 
 told me that the girl was engaged to marry soon. 
 This was a lie but meant for my good. I was 
 a foreigner, a Martian, I did not know the cus- 
 tom of this country, how to behave myself in 
 the presence of women, how to flatter, how to 
 show them little courtesies. The Inscrutable 
 Woman sent Dr. Guillon and his wife to teach 
 me all about it by their example: so I know it 
 now and am capable of courting a young lady. 
 Wolpert had been singing the truth. I was not 
 
 forgotten by the girl I left behind in P ; 
 
 she was waiting for me yet. Mr. Mortimer had 
 been advertising for a clock repairer. This also 
 shows that it was only a lie of the same kind 
 when he said that he had no position open for 
 me, after all, everything was properly arranged; 
 
 all that I had to do was to go to P , call a 
 
 clergyman and tie the knot. They used every 
 possible means for two months and a half to send 
 
 me to P but they failed. On Wednesday, 
 
 October i6, the day Dawson got married, and 
 Saturday, October 26, that is two days previous 
 to my birthday, the atmosphere of the store was 
 badly contaminated with lewd talk and obscene 
 drawings of the vilest kind and songs to match, 
 Mr. Tapken himself having his share in it. 
 They did all they could to induce me to go to 
 P , saying that they had heard from a re- 
 liable party about my preparations for my wed- 
 ding on my next birthday, that the reason why I 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 135 
 
 had concealed it from them was to give a sur- 
 prise. It was all in vain, I did not leave the 
 city. 
 
 After Dr. Guillon left the city a druggist 
 came from one of the western states. He took 
 the seat next to mine at the table, the one oc- 
 cupied by Mrs. Percy and Mrs. Guillon. It is 
 hardly necessary to say that he was another 
 admirer of girls, though he was a married man. 
 One day after supper he left the table and 
 walked out with me. I was going to the li- 
 brary, as usual. 
 
 "How old are you, forty?" he asked. 
 
 "Not yet, thirty-three," I said. 
 
 "You have to get married,' he said. 
 
 "Oh, no hurry about that," I said. "Plenty of 
 time yet." 
 
 We soon came near the library building and 
 parted. On the following day I mentioned this 
 incident to Wolpert. "Don't you think it strange 
 for the druggist," I asked him, "to tell me in 
 his first walk and talk with me that I had to get 
 married? One should have carried his acquaint- 
 ance with another to a certain extent before he 
 can make such a remark without being ridicu- 
 lous." 
 
 "Oh, it is only a joke," he said, "we do that 
 all the time. You are a very queer fellow." 
 
 The next day five of the boarders said to me 
 that I had to get married. 
 
 After the druggist left a bachelor minister 
 (Rev. Campbell) came and took the druggist's 
 seat. He was with us only for two weeks and 
 nothing of interest occurred except that Wol- 
 
136 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 pert told me that he had come to his room once 
 or twice, and was so fond of girls that he could 
 not be induced to speak about anything else, 
 that he had attempted more than once to intro- 
 duce some other subject, but in vain, he would 
 immediately return to the same subject and tell 
 him his adventures with them. After this came 
 an electrician and his wife, Mr. and Mrs. Ar- 
 lington. It was said the latter was a writer. 
 We shall return to this couple in the sequel. 
 
 Everyone in the store seemed very anxious 
 to introduce me to girls. Judging from what 
 they said, there was hardly a girl, rich or poor, 
 educated or illiterate, accomplished or not, in the 
 city as well as in the outskirts of the city, who 
 was not desirous to meet me with a view to 
 making my acqua.intance. Some of them, they 
 said, had seen me, in the library and thought I 
 was a very intelligent young man, others that I 
 was highly educated, another party that I looked 
 very respectable. Once Wolpert offered to buy 
 two show tickets for me if I would take a girl 
 to the theater; naturally I refused his offer, 
 whereupon he began to sing the following song, 
 "Well, I would if I could but I can't because 
 I'm a married man." Then he said to me that 
 I must be a married man with a wife some- 
 where or probably more than one, otherwise I 
 would invite young ladies out as every young 
 man does. I simply told him that he was per- 
 fectly free to suppose me a married man if he 
 preferred to do so. 
 
 Another characteristic of the American 
 women much emphasized by them was her feel- 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 137 
 
 ing of aversion to the man whom her presence 
 failed to impress, and my pretended indifference 
 to female society was a scheme on my part to 
 obviate the pang of humiliprtion consequent upon 
 rejection — a deserved contempt of women upon 
 the discovery. 
 
 Incontinence to such an extreme degree can- 
 not even be attributed to the animals. Does the 
 possession of reason degrade man so low, in- 
 stead of elevating him to a higher stage in obedi- 
 ence to its salutary dictates of repression and 
 control of a transient physical appetite, by the 
 unchecked indulgence of which thousands of 
 human lives are being yearly blighted in their 
 prime of life ! Compare this with what Jesus 
 said, "Whosoever shall look on a woman to lust 
 after her hath already committed adultery with 
 her in his mind." (Matt. V, 28.) Adultery is a 
 word never made use of by the American young 
 man; he can never be convicted of adultery. 
 An honorable name has been substituted for it — 
 "Free love," and "Man cannot be without." 
 
 One day, tired and disgusted of their con- 
 stant abuse and derision, I said to Wolpert that 
 I had decided to leave N about the begin- 
 ning of March and go probably across the At- 
 lantic with a view to going either into the jew- 
 elery or the photograph business. The next 
 day he began to sing the following song: 
 
 "Honey boy I hate to see you leaving, 
 Honey boy, you know my heart is grieving. 
 When you are sailing, sailing over the sea, 
 honey boy, honey boy. 
 
138 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 And if ever you should take a notion to come 
 
 home sailing across the ocean, 
 Honey boy, never fear, 
 I will be waiting, waiting, waiting for you, 
 
 honey boy." 
 
 Dawson and his wife came to the store after 
 their honeymoon trip. Dawson introduced me 
 to his wife. After a little while she came to 
 our side in order to thank us for the wedding 
 present we had given her. 
 
 "Mrs. Dawson," said Wolpert, "Baron wants 
 to come to your house when your husband is 
 away." 
 
 "Why do you employ such profane lan- 
 guage ?" I asked when she had gone home. 
 
 "Just because you do not like it," he said. 
 
 "There are many good things that I do not 
 like, yet I have been trying to make myself ac- 
 customed so in time I may be able to like them," 
 I said, "but I cannot see a reason why I should 
 like to use such language or hear what is uni- 
 versally regarded as unbecoming, and those who 
 use it are called ill-bred." 
 
 "You are in love," they said, "and that is 
 the reason you do not like it; all Americans 
 speak that way and all of them like to hear it 
 spoken. We are only helping you on into matri- 
 mony; there are so many girls in the city, we 
 would like to see you married." 
 
 What fools these people be! Is this the way 
 to induce one to matrimony? It may lead a 
 weak-minded man to a bawdy-house but seldom 
 to matrimony; and if to the latter the result is 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 139 
 
 bound to be worse than that of the former. 
 That same evening I went to the Hbrary, and 
 taking "Laws of New Jersey," commenced to 
 read in it "Crimes and Criminal Proceedings." 
 I soon came across to the act making abscene 
 talk and exposing or selling lewd pictures a mis- 
 demeanor punishable by one hundred dollars fine 
 and two months' imprisonment or both. Evi- 
 dently, I said to myself, those who enacted this 
 law must have been in love and who would like 
 neither to hear obscene talk nor see lewd pictures. 
 The solution ! 
 
 The next day I mentioned the law to Wolpert. 
 "Well," he said, "then you can have me ar- 
 rested." 
 
 "No, I don't mean that," I said, "until now I 
 thought you have only been breaking the law of 
 decency or modesty, but now I know it is against 
 the law of the country also. You do not seem 
 to have much respect for it." 
 
 He said nothing about it until the next day; 
 just before going to dinner. "Have you ever 
 seen drawings on the walls of the public lava- 
 tories?" he asked me. 
 
 "Yes, I have seen a few of them, what about 
 it?" I said. 
 
 "Oh, the detectives," he said, with a dose of 
 irony, "will soon arrest the offenders and put 
 them in jail." 
 
 It looked as if he had been instructed by the 
 "gang" with whom he seemed to have been in 
 constant communication to say this to me. I 
 said nothing because it was plain enough he was 
 trying to make me understand that the law in 
 
140 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 question was no more than a dead letter and 
 was being broken with impunity. 
 
 Tolerance, I said to myself one day, is a sign 
 of civilization. Can it be that I lack tolerance 
 because I belong to a nation which is considered 
 uncivilized! Why not let them do what they 
 like. I wonder if the Americans who are sup- 
 posed to be one of the most civilized nations in 
 the world would endure with equanimity the 
 treatment I have been subjected to? The fol- 
 lowing three instances show clearly that they 
 fall a great deal short of the mark. 
 
 I. One day I wrote the following letter on a 
 piece of paper from memory (I cannot claim 
 originality to it), and gave it to Dawson. 
 
 Dear Sir: Does personal property include 
 umbrellas? If so somebody, at this moment, 
 must be bewailing the loss of such a piece of 
 property which is resting with the stolid uncon- 
 sciousness of an inorganic mattef in our ma- 
 jolica jar where you left it; but, alas! mine is 
 not there; could it be that, wearied by its long 
 imprisonment, my umbrella prevailed over your 
 umbrella to change places with it so that mine 
 could have an airing while yours secured a much 
 needed rest? Far be it from me to blame you 
 for the exchange. It is, no doubt, a deep-laid 
 scheme on the part of the umbrellas themselves. 
 
 Your umbrella, which I now have, is much 
 larger, newer, and showier, as to the handle, 
 than mine, which you now possess? As I object 
 to large, new and showy umbrellas and prefer 
 small, old and plain ones, will you do yourself 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 141 
 
 the favor of re-exchanging them when you next 
 cross our threshold and thus set at rest the 
 heart of 
 
 Yours concernedly. 
 P. S. — It may happen to be a bright day when 
 you next call at our house, but never mind; 
 bring the umbrella. To be obliged to carry it 
 under a clear sky may serve a wholesome disci- 
 pline to the umbrella. 
 
 I thought this was an oddity and very amus- 
 ing. He read it and then turning towards me, 
 "What are you insinuating by that?" he said. 
 
 "Nothing at all," I said, "I merely thought 
 that it was a queer piece of literature. The 
 original is to be found in a letter writer." 
 
 He gave it to Pierson who, after a little while, 
 brought it back to me, subjoined, "Please do not 
 write anything like that any more," and signed 
 "B. U. Tapken," but the handwriting was Pier- 
 son's. 
 
 They had been insinuating something daily 
 both by words and actions, week after week, 
 month after month; they thought I was trying 
 to get even with them. This they could not 
 tolerate. I had not such intention. If I had 
 known that it would displease them I would not 
 have written' it, and when they told me to stop 
 it I did and never wrote any more like that. 
 On the other hand I had told them not to do, 
 not harmless and amusing things like mine, but 
 what are against the law, morality and good 
 breeding; they would do them twice, thrice as 
 often, declaring that they would do so just be- 
 
142 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 cause I did not like them. They were, indeed, 
 very far of proving themselves possessed of 
 the degree of tolerance attributed to the civilized 
 people. 
 
 2. One morning while seated at my bench in 
 
 P several comic postals and other pictures 
 
 came to me by mail. One of them represented 
 a lady and a gentleman in the act of osculation, 
 holding an umbrella, made of very thin ma- 
 terial, over their head. A second one an electric 
 incandescent lamp with human eyes, nose, and 
 mouth, few lines at the bottom to the effect that 
 I had been dazzling the eyes of the girls, and 
 scaring them; also others. They bore no sig- 
 nature. 
 
 "What is the meaning of these comic pic- 
 tures?" I asked my fellow-employees. 
 
 "They are Valentines," they said, and 
 laughed. 
 
 "What is a Valentine?" I demanded. 
 
 "Don't you know what a Valentine is?" they 
 said. "Why, people send comic pictures on Val- 
 entine's Day, more especially fellows and girls, 
 to each other. Didn't you send any Valentines 
 at all?" 
 
 "How could I," I said, "when I do not know 
 what a Valentine is? Well," I added, "I shall 
 send a few of them next year." 
 
 The following year I bought seven or eight 
 Valentines, all comic ones. But before mailing 
 them I asked Chapman (a watchmaker about 
 fifty years old) if it was proper for me to send 
 comic Valentines or not. "Certainly," he said, 
 "you can send the good ones on Christmas and 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 143 
 
 New Year's Day; comic ones are made espe- 
 cially for Valentine's Day." I took the second 
 precaution of enclosing them in sealed enve- 
 lopes, affixing a two-cent stamp to each one of 
 them, so they could be destroyed in case they 
 were displeasing. 
 
 They were delivered by the first mail. When 
 they opened the envelopes and saw all comic 
 ones they immediately went about the task of 
 finding who had sent them. By comparing the 
 handwritings on the envelopes they rriade sure 
 of the offender. Without losing time they went 
 out to a dealer and bought some Valentines to 
 match what they got and mailed them to me. I 
 received some on the fifteenth and others on the 
 sixteenth of the month. 
 
 I sent one of them to a lady in the house 
 where Chapman boarded, but before sending it 
 I asked Chapman's advice about it, whether she 
 would like it or not, after having told what the 
 picture represented. 
 
 "She will like it," he said, "that is just the 
 proper thing for her. Oh ! send it, please, we 
 shall have a hearty laugh." 
 
 So I mailed it to her. As soon as she opened 
 the letter, "I know who sent this," she said. 
 She went to a store, bought one to match it and 
 mailed it to the party whom she suspected; later 
 on she discovered her mistake, whereupon she 
 mailed a second one to a second party; she is 
 wrong again. After a month she learned from 
 Chapman that I was the disturber of her peace 
 of mind. I think it was in April when she sent 
 it back to me by the mail. 
 
144 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 What I did was no more than what they had 
 done the previous year. I took the advice of an 
 old and experienced man. I enclosed them in 
 sealed envelopes, and yet the result was more 
 than I could ever have imagined. Is this the 
 manner in which foreigners are treated by the 
 descendants of foreigners? This was the only 
 Valentine's Day in which I had any part. I have 
 sent none since nor do I care to send any more. 
 Many times I have asked for information of the 
 Americans and they have almost always given 
 me the very wrong one. I suppose they do it in 
 order to see us foreigners stumble, so they can 
 laugh at us and thus amuse themselves. Amer- 
 icans are a very sportive people and far less 
 serious than foreigners, nor are reasons lacking 
 to account for this fact; nevertheless, they often 
 push it too far. 
 
 3. "Is R — — 's clock ready?" asked Pierson 
 one day. "The man has called for it." 
 
 "Yes, it is ready," I said, "if you only wait 
 a minute so I can dust it." 
 
 "Never mind the dust," he said, "he is only a 
 damned Hungarian," and he took the clock from 
 my hands and went out to the store. 
 
 "Why," I said, "damned Hungarians, damned 
 Italians, damned Martians, damned Germans, 
 damned Jews and not damned Americans ?" 
 
 "Hey," shouted Wolpert, who was seated 
 close to me at his bench, to Pierson, "do you 
 hear, this damned Martian calls the Americans 
 damned ?" 
 
 Does it not indicate conceit in the extreme on 
 his part, who represents the average American, 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 145 
 
 to call me damned at the same time that he re- 
 sents a like offense? 
 
 "This is the first time I have ever used the 
 word damned in connection with any national- 
 ity," I said, "and if I ever use it again it will 
 be under a similar circumstance. The law of 
 this country puts no distinction between the 
 Americans and foreigners, regards them as 
 equal. If one of them is damned why not the 
 ■other?" 
 
 "But foreigners make their living in this 
 country," he said. 
 
 "What have you to say about your grand- 
 father," I demanded, "whom you say was a 
 German and came to this country years ago? 
 Would you call him damned grandpa were he 
 living now?" 
 
 "I am not speaking about my grandfather," 
 he said. 
 
 The epithet "damned" was seldom divorced 
 from the word foreigner. I had reminded him 
 more than once of his grandfather's and grand- 
 mother's being foreigners, but he had invariably 
 answered that they were either dead or that he 
 was not speaking of them. He considered this 
 a satisfactory answer and was well pleased with 
 it. Now let us throw this argument into the 
 form of syllogism: 
 
 (Mjr.) Those who come to this country to 
 make a living are damned. 
 
 (Mnr.) My grandfather came to this coun- 
 try to make his living. 
 
 (Con.) Therefore I am not speaking of my 
 grandfather. 
 
146 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 To draw such a conclusion from the forego- 
 ing premises indicates extreme ignorance; but 
 how great is the number of those who are per- 
 fectly satisfied with it. The range of vision of 
 these comon, ignorant, immoral people is very- 
 limited. They can hardly see beyond the tips 
 of their noses. Should one lead them to the 
 truth, make it visible, they immediately close 
 their eyes lest they see it; and if truth is made 
 audible for them they close their ears forth- 
 with. It is simply "Casting pearls before swine." 
 
 That a feeling of hatred of, or aversion to, 
 foreigners is being entertained by, I will boldly 
 say, all Americans, but of varying degrees of 
 intensity, can hardly be contended, it being at 
 its maximum among the lowest class. What 
 the higher or the highest class has for reasons I 
 do not pretend to know. They may have good 
 reasons for it. 
 
 But the lower class seems to have three prin- 
 cipal reasons for it, each one of them being as 
 groundless as the above conclusion. 
 
 The Americans appear to think that one reason 
 why foreigners come to this country is to see 
 and come in contact with highly educated, cul- 
 tured human beings. If the Americans should 
 go to Northern Siberia, foreigners would surely 
 not follow them. It is not the Americans, but 
 America, its prosperity, which is due mainly to 
 the energy of the foreign element of the present 
 as well as of the past, and affords better means 
 for making a livelihood, that thus attracts the 
 tide of the immigrants. 
 
 Foreigners are not to be regarded inferior be- 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 147 
 
 ings just because they have lately arrived in this 
 country, nor Americans superior on account of 
 their longer habitation on the continent, in some 
 cases extending to a number of generations; nor 
 is the broken English or foreign accent of the 
 former a sure indication of their ignorance. As 
 a rule, the foreigner knows his mother tongue 
 as well as the American knows his own, while 
 his English, imperfect though it may be, is a 
 clear advantage over the latter. 
 
 The first charge against the foreigner is the 
 depresion of wages. I have not seen yet the 
 man of any nationality who would willingly work 
 for low wages preferably to a higher one within 
 his reach. But when it is a question of star- 
 vation and working for low wages, the one alter- 
 native to be chosen is too clear to need any com- 
 ment. However, the facts are against the low- 
 ering of the wage scale. The industrial com- 
 mission, after hearing the most conflicting evi- 
 dence on both sides of the question, is forced 
 to conclude that a positive effect of immigration 
 on wages cannot be predicated. But, in fact, 
 native wage-earners have been pushed to higher 
 grades of employments, because foreigners form 
 mainly the illiterate, unskilled and non-profes- 
 sional laboring class ; the best men, being fairly 
 placed at home, are naturally disinclined to emi- 
 grate. 
 
 With respect to crimes, the great ones, as re- 
 liable statistics show, are committed mostly by 
 native-born criminals, and the petty ones by those 
 of foreign-born. Nor the latter class shows 
 more tendency to crime over the former, class 
 
148 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 for class. There are no worse governed or more 
 corrupt cities in the Union than some where the 
 foreign element is relatively small. 
 
 A second charge against foreigners is hoard- 
 ing the money of the country and keeping it 
 from circulation. 
 
 It is an undeniable fact that foreigners are 
 more frugal than Americans ; nor can it be other- 
 wise, so long as the circumstances promoting 
 frugality remain as they are. Ten Christmases 
 and as many New Years have passed by since 
 I have been in this country. But they all have 
 not cost me ten cents. Would this have been 
 possible if I were an American, or if I had been 
 in my own country. One St. Valentine's Day 
 cost me fifty cents, the story of which is well 
 known to the reader. Friends, acquaintances, 
 and relatives are a costly luxury. They drain 
 one's income. However, they have their good 
 side, as every thorn has its rose. Foreigners are 
 exempt from the one and often hopelessly de- 
 prived of the other. The balance of their wages, 
 after spending for the necessaries of life, are 
 deposited in a savings bank. This is wrongly 
 called by some hoarding or keeping from cir- 
 culation. Hoarding is hardly practised these 
 days to any extent worth mentioning. 
 
 In the early times, when the hold on property 
 was insecure, saving took the form of storing up 
 money and useful commodities to remain idle 
 and unproductive. This is hoarding, and may be 
 carried to such an extent as' to lead Xo currency 
 famine or a scarcity of marketable products. 
 
 In modern times money is mainly saved for 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 149 
 
 investment in some productive enterprise, bring- 
 ing greater returns. Such investments are made 
 either directly by the persons themselves or in- 
 directly through some bank. In these times sav- 
 ing is evidently the very opposite of hoarding. 
 In fact, it marks the first step in capital forma- 
 tion, and capital is defined as stored up labor 
 to assist future production. 
 
 There are a great number of intelligent people 
 who excuse extravagance on the ground that it 
 increases trade. But those who save and invest 
 their savings are the means of as great an in- 
 crease in trade as the prodigal who spends his 
 entire income. With the latter, there is noth- 
 ing in hand to show for the money consumed, 
 while the former still have an equivalent in either 
 goods, buildings, machinery, etc. Consumption 
 is not an end to economic activity; it is merely 
 a means to that end. 
 
 It is most desirable that everyone should 
 maintain a high standard of living, develop their 
 higher wants, satisfy their highest ambitions, 
 and at the same time abstain from useless and 
 injurious expenditure. Any amount of money 
 saved and invested means the addition of an 
 equivalent sum to the wealth of the country, but 
 if it is spent for destructible goods, the addition 
 dwindles down to a mere fraction of the sum — 
 namely, the profit made by the producer. 
 
 Dante assigns to the prodigal the same punish- 
 ment and expiation as to the miser; the society 
 of to-day goes further — regards the latter su- 
 perior to the former. The prodigal is as selfish 
 as the miser, except in the eyes of those who 
 
150 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 are benefited by flattery, and is wanting in self- 
 control. Avarice implies discipline to which a 
 better direction may be given, but prodigality ad- 
 mits of no such transformation. 
 
 Savings banks, insurance companies, friendly, 
 co-operative and trade union societies, have all 
 a lesson for us — to be saving, frugal. Ameri- 
 cans as well as foreigners are all desirous to 
 have something saved for rainy days. The for- 
 mer, living among relatives, find themselves often 
 badly handicapped. They like the savings but 
 not the saver, more especially if he is a for- 
 eigner. Saving, when expressed in a feeling of 
 envy, becomes hoarding. 
 
 A third charge against foreigners is the ex- 
 portation of money — taking it out of this country 
 and spending in their own country. 
 
 Ten thousand Italians come to this country 
 and lay a railroad track, say from New York to 
 Philadelphia. They save $10,000,000, and re- 
 turn home with the money. "Damned Italians ! 
 They took $10,000,000 out of the country." 
 They left behind their combined labor, repre- 
 sented by the railroad worth $50,000,000 ; but no 
 mention is made of it. 
 
 One thousand foreigners work in a gold mine. 
 They save $1,000,000, and go home with the 
 money. "Damned foreigners ! They robbed the 
 country of its $1,000,000 cash." They extracted 
 gold from the mine valued $10,000,000, which 
 has been circulating in the country, but no men- 
 tion is made of that. 
 
 Now, were it possible for the foreigners to 
 drain this country of more than half of its specie, 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 151 
 
 the consequence, in a very complicated way, 
 would be depression of wages, reduction of price 
 of goods, produce and rent. Control of the 
 foreign markets would follow. Goods would be 
 exported and sold as fast as they could be manu- 
 factured. There would be no idle man in the 
 country, provided he was willing to work, until 
 money by a constant influx into this country 
 finds its level as well in wages, rent and the price 
 of produce. 
 
 An enormous decrease of specie is as un- 
 favorable to general prosperity as an increase of 
 it in a country. Money is a sort of common 
 measure for calculating values. It ought always 
 to be fixed, and to conform to an established 
 rule. Extreme fluctuations entail disorder in a 
 country; small fluctuations do not affect appre- 
 ciably the public in general ; but it may, in vary- 
 ing degrees, the capitalists, banking and loaning 
 companies. 
 
 Money saved and exported by foreign laborers 
 affects this country no more than the Gulf 
 Stream or other similar currents do the level 
 of the water at the equatorial or arctic regions, 
 although the efflux of water apparently has been 
 constantly going on from the former to the lat- 
 ter for many centuries. There are undercur- 
 rents to keep up the level. Whatever is taken 
 out of this country has, as a rule, been paid for ; 
 something different in kind, it may be, is given in 
 exchange, and in the majority of cases what goes 
 out is only a fraction of what remains behind. 
 
 Wolpert's memorable answer, "Because for- 
 eigners make their living in this country," to my 
 
152 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 question as to why they were damned, but not 
 Americans, is a typical answer to be found upon 
 the lips of almost every American, ready to re- 
 mind the foreigners that they are greatly in- 
 debted to this country for making their living 
 here, and, in consequence, are expected to make 
 any sacrifice that may be required of them for 
 the good pleasure of those who own the country 
 • — the Americans, and bear patiently when ex- 
 posed to raillery, contempt and abuse. In ac- 
 tuality, a native-born laborer owns the country 
 no more than a foreign-born laborer. 
 
 Now let us, for a minute, consider the prob- 
 able result if only wealthy immigrants were ad- 
 mitted to this country. It is evident that such 
 a class of foreigners do not have to make their 
 living in this country, and, by implication, they 
 cannot be called "damned." 
 
 These wealthy foreigners want domestic help 
 — cooks, waiters, servants, nurses, etc. — which 
 will be recruited from the available Americans, 
 and the balance will be engaged in a great num- 
 ber of employments which are indispensable for 
 the existence and the preservation of any com- 
 munity. Nine out of every ten, if not even 
 more, required for the proper conduct of busi- 
 ness will not be forthcoming. What a poor, 
 stagnant, lifeless place America would become! 
 There would be nothing to export; everything is 
 to be imported, even what is necessary for the 
 wants of existence. 
 
 The poor immigrants who come to this coun- 
 try "to make a living" have made this country 
 what it is. They have enabled vast enterprises 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 153 
 
 to be carried out, agriculture, mining, rnanufac- 
 turing industries, canals, railroads, highways, 
 public works, etc., etc. The least progressive 
 states are those with the least number of foreign- 
 born. The most progressive states are those 
 with the greatest number of foreign-born. _ For- 
 eigners have added directly as well as indirectly 
 to the nation's wealth. Now it is quite clear 
 whether foreigners are indebted to the country 
 or the country to foreigfners. 
 
 Every foreigner who offers his honest labor 
 contributes to the wealth of the country in vary- 
 ing quantities; some of them just a little, others 
 many times the amount they save. When an 
 alien prefers to go to his own country — aye, even 
 carrying his savings with him — it is the duty of 
 every American to thank him for his services 
 rendered to the country, for leaving it better 
 and wealthier than it was when he landed. 
 
 The American who neglects this sacred duty 
 is an ingrate. 
 
 It was about in the middle of November, 1907, 
 when I received a letter from a mining company 
 in New York soliciting investments, having 
 offered for sale a number of preferred shares of 
 the stock of some gold mine located, if I remem- 
 ber correctly, in Mexico. There was no fear 
 of losing the principal, for the reason that the 
 laws of Mexico are more strict and more favor- 
 able to insure security of the investor's money 
 than those of the United States. As to the rate 
 of dividend, a remittance of twenty-three per 
 cent, was guaranteed, with a further prospect of 
 
154 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 as high as fifty-five per cent, per annum to the 
 shareholders. 
 
 The youth occupying the room next to mine, 
 and aping my movements in the mornings and 
 evenings, left his room on the twenty-sixth day 
 of October, on the same day when lewd songs 
 were being sung in the store, I suppose, to the 
 devil, and congratulations were showered upon 
 me for the prospective wedding, which, diey 
 said, was going to take place on the twenty- 
 eighth day of the month (my birthday). 
 
 Wednesday, November 20, a young man 
 rented the same room. The first night, while I 
 was sleeping, he dropped something on the floor, 
 probably one of his shoes, from the height of 
 about two yards, judging from the noise it made. 
 This woke me up. I lit the gas, and it was 
 twelve-thirty A. M. The following night he did 
 the same thing again. I got up, and it was one 
 o'clock A. M. The next day I asked Mrs. Walker 
 (the mistress of the house) of the man who had 
 occupied the next room, and of his business, 
 wondering if he was a railroader, and worked 
 late in the evenings. 
 
 "Why, no," she said; "he said that he was a 
 broker. When I remarked that this was a very 
 small city, he said that he expected to do a very 
 extensive business and stay very long." 
 
 This was enough; I understood everything. 
 I remembered how I had told Wolpert, about 
 two weeks ago that a certain newspaper was 
 advising the public to invest their savings or 
 surplus money buying stock or bonds, as they 
 were very low that year on account of the cur- 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 155 
 
 rency famine and financial distress. Whereupon 
 he had asked me if I would invest my savings. 
 I had, in answer, told him that I would not, for 
 the reason that I knew no reliable broker, and 
 was quite ignorant of the laws and the regula- 
 tions of investments, bonds, etc. Now a broker 
 had come, and was living in the same house with 
 me. He was evidently making that noise in 
 the nights in order to draw my attention towards 
 him, so as to have me inquire of him, expecting 
 that my knowledge of his business would be suf- 
 ficient to induce me to make investments through 
 him. 
 
 The Inscrutable Woman seemed at this time 
 to have been hard at work. It was a pretty good 
 scheme to rob me of my hard-earned savings by 
 promising an impossible rate of dividend up to 
 fifty-five per cent, per annum. 
 
 As soon as I went to the store I said to Wol- 
 pert that a broker had rented the room next to 
 mine. 
 
 "Are you going to invest your savings?" he 
 asked me. 
 
 "Not a cent of it," I said. I expected that he 
 would go and tell him all about it, and thus stop 
 making noise during the nights. It happened 
 just as I expected. He never made any more 
 noise after that. 
 
 I received a second letter from the same com- 
 pany, stating that it was the last chance to avail 
 myself of the opportunity offered. But I paid 
 no attention to it. When the broker found out 
 that I was not going to invest any money, he 
 left the city, giving his room to an insurance 
 
156 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 man on the same day of his departure. I was 
 ignorant of the change for some time, because I 
 did not know him by sight, having never spoken 
 to him, until Mr. McClellan, another roomer in 
 the same house, told me about it. This was ap- 
 parently a device to make me think that the 
 broker was still doing "extensive business." But 
 if he had left his room vacant I should have 
 good reason to think that he came there for the 
 express purpose to induce me to make invest- 
 ments. 
 
 Every time that I received a letter, especially 
 from home or my sister, Wolpert as well as 
 Dawson, Pierson and Henry would throng about 
 me and examine the envelope to see how it 
 was addressed. 
 
 "Do you write and pronounce your name in 
 your own language exactly as you do it in Eng- 
 lish?" asked Wolpert one day. 
 
 "No, not exactly; considered in one way, the 
 difference is very small, and in another way very 
 great." 
 
 "I cannot understand how the difference can 
 be small and great at the same time. It sounds 
 very queer to me. Will you write and explain 
 to me? It must be very interesting." 
 
 Whereupon I wrote my name, letter by letter, 
 "Yedward Davit Baron." "Now you see the dif- 
 ference is quite insignificant; but I have three 
 more surnames, Frenchmanson, Clergymanson 
 and Smithson (Goldsmithson). No one in our 
 country," I went on, "excepting in a few princi- 
 pal cities, will haye his name printed on cards 
 to give to his friends or customers, nor have his 
 
"Not Guilty" Unavailing 157 
 
 name or business sign painted on the window of 
 his store. Everyone is called after his first or 
 Christian name, while the surname indicates the 
 trade or the business of one's father, grand- 
 father or great-grandfather. My oldest surname 
 is Frenchmanson, deriving its origin from the 
 country whence my grandfather came years ago, 
 who, being a clergyman, we are called Clergy- 
 manson also. My father was a goldsmith; this 
 gave us a third surname. The last two are be- 
 ing used indiscriminately or with equal fre- 
 quency, while the first one so seldom as the next 
 generation will hardly know of it. When I ap- 
 plied for my first citizenship paper I signed rny 
 
 ■ full name on the application blank, which cov- 
 ered two lines. I told the clerk the reason why 
 I had so many names that I had never used them 
 in this country nor intended to do so. Thus I 
 dropped them with the advice of the clerk. As 
 a rule, Martians have long names and longer sur- 
 names. They are exceedingly hard for the 
 Americans to pronounce. It sounds so bad to 
 our ears that nearly fifty per cent, o^ all the 
 
 ■ Martians change or modify their names as much 
 as practicable." 
 
 He copied my full name in his notebook, and 
 put it in his pocket. He took it out once in a 
 while and studied it. 
 
 Then he commenced to talk of the suicide 
 problem. I recollected that Anthony, exactly a 
 year ago, had done the same thing, at the end 
 telling me that I was going to marry her if I did 
 not gpmmit suicide. Now Wolpert took up the 
 same subject, and wanted to know what I 
 
158 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 thought of those who commit suicide, v(rhether 
 such persons might have good reasons for the 
 act. I gave him about the same answer which I 
 had given to Anthony, namely, that it was cow- 
 ardly to commit suicide, and that I was going to 
 live as long as I could, regardless of the condi- 
 tion I should happen to be in. 
 
 This suicide problem, however, made me quite 
 uneasy. I began to suspect that some more 
 trouble was ahead of me. I could even tell the 
 kind of trouble that was to follow, if it did, be- 
 cause there was but one source, England, and 
 the English Episcopalian minister, Dr. David 
 Guillon, was the messenger. 
 
 Next the talk was turned upon detectives, 
 prison, trials, of people who were recently ar- 
 rested and had to spend the next Christmas in 
 jail. Then he asked me if I had seen the Tombs, 
 Sing Sing, or had ever gone to Blackwell's Island. 
 The talk in the boarding house also was turned 
 upon the same topics. Several days passed in 
 this manner; I felt that the Inscrutable Woman 
 was very active, and that something would soon 
 turn out. 
 
 "Have you ever been in jail?" asked Wolpert 
 to me, after making such an elaborate prepara- 
 tion for the question. 
 
In the Old World 159 
 
 CHAPTER IV. 
 
 SOME ADVENTURES IN THE OLD WORLD. 
 
 "Since toss'd from shores to shores from lands to 
 
 lands, 
 Inhospitable rocks, and barren sands." 
 
 On the twenty-fifth of July, 1897, I went to 
 London, the metropoHs of England, the largest 
 city in the world, being about one hundred times 
 as large as the largest city I had ever been in up 
 to the date, leaving out of account the glimpses 
 that I had taken of Marseilles, Lyons and Paris, 
 through which I had passed. London had an 
 entirely 'different meaning for me. As I was 
 destined to stay there, to become a Londoner, 
 I had to get acquainted with • the city. It ap- 
 peared to me a regular labyrinth, more intricate 
 than those of Egypt and Crete, with its almost 
 innumerable streets, roads, lanes and terraces 
 running to every possible direction, not a few 
 of them deflecting from their regular course as 
 much as forty-five degrees, intersecting each 
 other at irregular intervals. To lose my way was 
 by no means an uncommon event for me. I well 
 remember the day I walked, like Robinson Cru- 
 soe, in a circle while in search of my room. At 
 first I asked a policeman if he would tell me 
 where Southwark Street was. He described the 
 
i5o The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 course to be taken. I began to proceed with a 
 quick pace. After a while I asked a second 
 policeman, then a third one; but when I put the 
 same question to a fourth one, he said, "You 
 asked me the very same thing about half an 
 hour ago; I hope you enjoyed your round trip." 
 
 Upon another occasion I happened to be in 
 the neighborhood of Piccadilly, a good distance 
 from Southwark Street or Southwark Bridge, 
 where I had a room. I did not know which way 
 to go. I thought that if I should ask a police- 
 man he would rather tell me which omnibus to 
 take, on account of the greatness of the distance, 
 while I preferred to walk. I knew Westminster 
 Bridge was not very far, if I only could get 
 there or come within sight of the Thames at 
 any point the rest would have been easy. So I 
 asked a policeman the wherabouts of Westmin- 
 ster Bridge. He was standing near a lamp-post 
 and did not appear to have anything to do. He 
 soon discovered from my accent that I was a 
 foreigner, just the one to have a little fun with. 
 
 "It is over the Thames," he said. 
 
 "Where is the Thames?" I asked again. 
 
 "Under the bridge," he said. 
 
 I made another attempt. "Where are the 
 Thames River and Westminster Bridge?" I de- 
 manded. 
 
 "In London, and London is in England, and 
 England is in this world," etc. No, he did not 
 push the fun so far. To my third questfon he 
 gave the right answer, and in about fifteen min- 
 utes I was walking over the bridge. 
 
 On the first day of October I was to be seen in 
 
In the Old World i6i 
 
 a cement factory, at work as a common laborer 
 in Grays, Essex, a small but pretty lively and 
 fast-growing town about twenty miles east of 
 London, with a population of eighteen thousand. 
 It has one endowed and two training-ship schools, 
 and factories to manufacture brick, lime, and 
 Portland cement. There were two more Mar- 
 tians in the factory. 
 
 I worked there for a whole year, when I left 
 Grays to go to Cyprus, having bought a camera 
 and photographic supplies. I took train as far 
 as Marseilles, and from Marseilles one of the 
 steamers of the Messagerie Maritime Company. 
 She took the most circuitous route, sailing close 
 to the northern shore of the Mediterranean as 
 far as to Canea; then she took an eastern direc- 
 tion to Smyrna, and thence to Constantinople, 
 where she harbored for two days; then back to 
 Smyrna, and then to Larnaca. 
 
 Thus after a cruise of a fortnight I landed 
 at Larnaca, a dead city in a lifeless and stagnant 
 island. On the third day of my landing I went 
 to Limasol, a city no better than the one I had 
 left, nor did I expect to find it better. 
 
 The change was so abrupt, the contrast so 
 great, I could still vividly imagine the immense 
 crowd surging on the sidewalks in the streets 
 of London at almost any hour of the day; the 
 incessant rumble caused by an endless chain of 
 wagons, cabs, and omnibuses were fresh in my 
 memory. Here everything was calm and quiet. 
 The dirty and dusty streets were almost en- 
 tirely deserted. Now one could be seen walking 
 across the street, or lingering, hesitating to ad- 
 
1 62 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 vance, lest, as it were, he should traverse the 
 whole length of the street too soon. 
 
 I stayed there a little over a month. The 
 Greek language is the only one spoken through- 
 out the island, although there are a good many 
 who can jabber English, and the old element 
 among the Mohametans can speak their mother 
 tongue as well. 
 
 The talk of the town was the disturbance in 
 Crete, this having been considered a question 
 of great importance with respect to the opposed 
 interests of the Greek and Moslem population, 
 they had temporarily laid aside the problem that 
 has engrossed the thoughts of at least ninety 
 per cent, of all the population of the world for 
 centuries, namely, the means of subsistence. 
 Those in Limasol appeared very far from prov- 
 ing themselves a rare exception to the general 
 rule prevailing among mankind. Any deviation 
 from the main topic meant the discussion of 
 the latter. 
 
 The Moslems appeared to be the more dissatis-- 
 fied with the general state of affairs. "The 
 change of a Medjidie," they said, "would make 
 eighty Metalics" (one cent in American money), 
 "and fill up one's purse, while now it makes but 
 twenty coppers in English coin; besides, each 
 Metalic had more purchasing value than a cop- 
 per has now. Allah's blessings are absent from 
 the Giavoor's money." 
 
 Nothing gives me more satisfaction than to 
 hear of the enhanced cost of living in countries 
 where a considerably lower rate prevails in com- 
 parison with the more advanced countries. I 
 
In the Old World 163 
 
 should very much like to see the day when the 
 cost of living will be on about the same level 
 all over the world, a sure sign of the approach of 
 the long-looked- for millennium of some, the 
 Utopia of others. "Brotherhood of humanity" 
 will be more than undulations of air traveling 
 from mouth to ear and vanishing like a bubble. 
 Exports and imports will be reduced to a mini- 
 mum, being confined mainly to natural produce. 
 Each country will be left upon its resources and 
 products for subsistence, and the population dis- 
 tributed according to the degree of fertility of 
 the different areas on the world. Enmity and 
 distrust betwen nations will cease, because con- 
 quest of one power over another will incur ir- 
 reparable damages, the advantage thus gained 
 being insufficient to counterbalance the loss of 
 the conqueror alone. Greed, an international 
 vice, will be eradicated for want of medium of 
 gainful activity. Billions of dollars will be saved 
 by the dismissal of millions of strong, healthy 
 young men supported by the labor of the rest 
 The working hours of every class will be greatly 
 reduced by such increase of laborers and re- 
 trenchment of the national expenses ; and if the 
 leisure thus gained is given the proper direction, 
 acquirement of culture will be within the reach 
 of each and all, be his vocation in life what it 
 may. Civilization and progress will be predi- 
 cated of more than a handful men living prac- 
 tically isolated from the rest of the population, 
 an overwhelming majority, who are wallowing in 
 vice and ignorance. 
 I left LJmasol oij the twenty-eight of Novem- 
 
164 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 bar, and went to Candia, a city of twenty-two 
 thousand, and still surrounded by its extensive 
 Venetian fortifications, situated in Crete, a sis- 
 ter island of Cyprus lying only about four hun- 
 dred miles west of it. The climate of the one 
 differs considerably from that of the other. 
 Scarcity of water is unknown in Crete, at least 
 in those parts which I have visited; while in 
 Cyprus rain water is being accumulated in cis- 
 terns and used for drink and culinary purposes. 
 The heat of summer is excessive and very de- 
 pressing in" the latter, while the Cretans enjoy 
 a cool summer without being subjected to the 
 inconvenience of a severe cold in winter, the 
 difference of temperature between summer and 
 winter being slight. The Cyprians are of sallow 
 complexion, as if suffering from ill-health; on 
 the contrary, the Cretans are lively and brisk, 
 flushed with color indicative of good health. 
 
 Candia had been occupied by England since 
 the fourteenth of November, 1898, after an at- 
 tack made by the Moslems of Candia on the 
 British garrison of that city, which had neces- 
 sitated the removal of the Ottoman troop. Retimo 
 was occupied by Russian, and Canea, the princi- 
 pal port of the island, by the international troops. 
 
 England had four thousand soldiers, consist- 
 ing of the Northumberland Fusiliers and the 
 Second Battalion Rifle Brigade, two thousand of 
 each. I had a pass from the colonel to go to the 
 camp. 
 
 Prince George of Greece, who was appointed 
 governor of the island, or, to state it more cor- 
 rectly, a high commissioner by the protecting 
 
In the Old World 165 
 
 powers, visited Candia. I snapped him twice. 
 Both of them proved to be good ones. They 
 were the best photos that could be had in the 
 city. I sold hundreds of copies of them. 
 
 After six months the Boer War commenced, 
 whereupon the English soldiers prepared to go 
 to South Africa. I did not stay very long in 
 Candia, but went to Piraeus, with a view of visit- 
 ing Athens, a name that reminds one of an old 
 nation and its history, its conquests and its de- 
 feats, a nation that has given birth to a number 
 of sages and philosophers, a religion, a system 
 of myths concerning the supernatural actions of 
 gods, goddesses and heroes swarming on the top 
 of the mountain Olympia. 
 
 I went twice to Athens. I walked up the hill 
 which they call Acropolis. The gods, goddesses, 
 and heroes had vanished, and their temples, 
 shrines and altars were in utter ruin. I went 
 thence direct to a near-by photographer and 
 bought photos representing the deities of otd 
 Greece. After visiting the national archaeolo- 
 gical museum, I came back to Piraeus, ready to 
 sail to Marseilles. 
 
 The steamer took us first to Naples. I sur- 
 veyed first of all, as it is natural, everything that 
 lay within my reach and ken. There was a spot 
 on the horizon, miles away. My attention was 
 instantly drawn to it, it being incomparably more 
 interesting to me than anything else — a trunkated 
 mountain, the volcano Vesuvius. Clouds of 
 smoke and steam were to be seen issuing from 
 the crater and orifices at day-time, at night 
 
1 66 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 tinged deep red by the reflection of the glowing 
 lava. 
 
 If the power that has been wasted through 
 the crater of this volcano could have been stored 
 up by human skill, harnessed and used economi- 
 cally, it would have been sufficient to supply 
 every house in the world with heat and light, 
 turn the wheels of every factory, run all the 
 trains, omnibuses, cars, etc. 
 
 "What power lies under that mountain ?" I ask 
 in awe and admiration. "A brute, blind force, 
 such as all natural agents are, a reservoir of im- 
 mense power. Can it be brought under proper 
 management, given a direction, an eye? Then 
 it is a blessing to mankind ; if not, a curse, 
 spreading havoc and destruction around." 
 
 Some women, numbering over a dozen, came 
 under my notice, pacing to and fro in the 
 steamer. They all were called "Margaretta." 
 It did not take very long to discover a sight most 
 pitiful, having never seen the like before. They 
 had their sex for sale, or rather for hire, in 
 order to prolong their miserable life. This is 
 the lowest stage a human being can make a 
 descent. Cast a glance upon the animals; a like 
 case can , nowhere be seen. The sexes in the 
 lower creation, in the majority of cases, serve 
 their end, though blindly; among mankind, 
 hardly one per cent., and this with a full knowl- 
 edge of consequences. Intelligence, like any 
 blind, brute, natural force, is a blessing if prop- 
 erly managed, well harnessed and directed to 
 the required channel; otherwise the possession 
 
In the Old World 167 
 
 of it becomes a curse, degrading the possessor 
 much below the level of brute beast. 
 
 The next day the steamer left Naples. I was 
 glad that I had left behind the most abominable 
 spot in the world that had come under my notice 
 up to the date. We soon found ourselves fac- 
 ing the city of Genoa. We were still in Italy. 
 This meant that the probability of another visit 
 from the "Margarettas" was not over. Happily 
 nothing of the kind happened. 
 
 I got off the steamer and walked up the whole 
 length of the harbor, having an area of some five 
 hundred acres. In the city a number of statues 
 were to be seen here and there. The most in- 
 teresting one for me was the marble statue of 
 Christopher Columbus in the piazza of Aqua- 
 verde. Next I bought a set of views of Genoa, 
 and a number of illustrated postal cards, a fad 
 quite unknown in England, and probably in the 
 United States, at the time. 
 
 We soon bade adieu to Genoa, and without 
 making any more stops, arrived at Marseilles. 
 I stayed there a week, in order to see the prin- 
 cipal parts of the city, the museum, the zoologi- 
 cal garden, etc. 
 
 One day, while walking all alone, I chanced to 
 go down a certain street. I took no notice of 
 the name. At the door of almost every store, 
 if I may so call it, there was a woman or more 
 who tried to induce me to go in. I wondered 
 what they wanted of me, or what they had to 
 offer for sale. Nothing was visible. Naturally, 
 prompted by curiosity, I peeped in through the 
 door of some of them. There was nothing 
 
1 68 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 visible but a bed or two. I thought I had left 
 Naples, together with its vice, far away, but I 
 was mistaken. It was true with respect to the 
 city, but not the kind of vice. 
 
 Degenerated, demoralised human (unworthy 
 of the name) beings; degraded, sunk in filth, 
 biped brute beasts. We will not tolerate our 
 domestic animals to live such a life, although 
 animals are seldom guilty of access in sensual- 
 ity. We get rid of them, or keep the sexes iso- 
 lated from each other, and watch them grow 
 stronger and healthier as the result of the sep- 
 aration with a feeling of satisfaction. Intro- 
 duce the man into the arena, and observe the 
 change. A religious significance is given to brute 
 feeling. It is called holy love, union of soul with 
 soul, finding of the affinities, divine mystery, 
 and what not. No wonder that man surpasses 
 the lower creation in sensuality, the unrestrained 
 indulgence of which entails increased intensity 
 of the appetite. The full extent of the evil, 
 however, can only be realized in consideration 
 of the inheritability of the appetite to the off- 
 spring growing more powerful or unmanageable 
 with each succeeding generation. 
 
 Such a mystical explanation with respect to 
 the emotion, or the intense degree of it — ^pas- 
 sion — in question was far from being satisfac- 
 tory to the moralists of the nineteenth century; 
 in consequence, they resolved it to a moral duty. 
 Pleasure, or a chain of pleasures — happiness, 
 they said — is the principle of morality. In other 
 words, we are morally bound to seek pleasure. 
 Sexual indulgence is a source of pleasure ad- 
 
In the Old World 169 
 
 mitting of no dispute, hence it is a moral duty 
 just for the pleasure it affords, even apart from 
 its procreative end. 
 
 Others again thought that man could do no 
 better than obey an innate, universally existing 
 demand, a powerful desire as the voice of God 
 commanding submission. 
 
 In the first argument the moral "ought" is 
 unsound. To make pleasure or happiness the 
 principle of morality is to nullify morality. 
 While in the second one the moral "ought" is 
 entirely eliminated, impulse being immediately 
 followed by action, a characteristic of the irra- 
 tional animal, without taking the intermediate 
 steps of deliberation, judgment, choice or pref- 
 erence, a characteristic of the rational animal- 
 man, of whom morality can be predicated. No 
 impulse, feeling, emotion, passion or desire is 
 moral unless it subserves the end which it ought 
 to when realized in action. The final end where- 
 by an act is to be tested implies the universal 
 element in morality. The intermediate acts be- 
 tween a desire and the final end — ^what are called 
 the means — are separate ends in themselves, each 
 to be put to the same test in succession. This 
 being the only way to discriminate virtue from 
 vice, a moral act from the immoral, and embrace 
 the one, rejecting the other. 
 
 At the end of the week I left Marseilles and 
 went to Paris. This was my third visit to the 
 great city. I stayed there but two hours. I 
 had planned spending two weeks in Paris during 
 the World's Fair of 1900, but how ignorant we 
 poor mortals are of the future! Nothing short 
 
lyo The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 of a miracle wrought by some supernatural be- 
 ing could have brought me to the scene of the 
 exhibition. How often our plans are subverted, 
 our trend in life deflected, in spite of ourselves, 
 by, as it were, an unseen yet irresistible hand, 
 from its regular peaceful course, while dream- 
 ing pleasantly in a bliss of ignorance, and put 
 to a path all too thorny, and shown a direction 
 wherein to proceed, though ill adapted to our 
 natural bent and likings; but implicit obedience 
 to the command is enjoined upon all — the philo- 
 sopher by the call of duty, the ignorant and un- 
 instructed by the lash of hunger and love or 
 lust, until the span of life is traversed. We 
 depart from the world with desires unattained 
 and ambitions unfulfilled. 
 
 I took the train. Paris soon began to recede 
 until it was lost to sight. She made her last 
 stop at Dieppe, on the northern boundary of 
 France. I had travelled by this time the whole 
 length of the country, but not arrived at my 
 destination. A steamer was ready to carry us 
 across- the rough waters of the English Channel, 
 and while carrying, to shake off, as it were, the 
 dust from our feet and clothing before we would 
 be allowed to land on English soil. From New- 
 haven it took about two hours for the iron horse 
 to transport to London, whence I had departed 
 but nine months ago; a return much sooner, if 
 ever, than I had tibought of at the time of my 
 departure. 
 
The Four Perjurers 171 
 
 CHAPTER V. 
 
 THE FOUR PERJURERS. 
 
 "Stone walls do not a prison make. 
 Nor iron bars a cage; 
 Minds innocent and quiet take 
 That for an hermitage." 
 
 It was time that I should look for something 
 to do. I could not continue spending money 
 very long without earning any. I had some 
 money saved, and thought of going into the jew- 
 elry business, my old trade, preferably in a small 
 city or town. 
 
 I went first of all to Grays, to see my old 
 friend Shine, and in the meanwhile consult him 
 about my business plan. His brother also had 
 come there while I was away. 
 
 Shine was a little dark complexioned young 
 man. He could speak, read and write Martian, 
 Russian, English, French and Greek, also Ger- 
 man, Arabic and Persian enough to understand. 
 Besides being a linguist, he was a living ency- 
 clopaedia, a genius. None of my questions put 
 to him had remained unanswered. For a whole 
 year he had been the source of almost all my 
 information. He had but a small head. I used 
 to tell him very often that what his cranium con- 
 tained was not of ordinary brain-matter, but 
 the essence of it. He had been a student of 
 R College in C . His father, a telegra- 
 
172 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 pher, died when he was seventeen years old, 
 wftile having still two more years to complete 
 the regular course of the college which would 
 entitle him to the degree of A. B. Whereupon 
 he was obliged to discontinue study in order to 
 support himself, his mother and a younger bro- 
 ther. He obtained a position as a bookkeeper, 
 but on account of some political unrest and con- 
 sequent bloodshed, he left his country and went 
 to England. Repeated attempts to obtain a posi- 
 tion as a boookkeeper or clerk ended in failure. 
 
 His mother in distressed condition in C , he, 
 
 penniless in London, wrote to a friend in Man- 
 chester to lend him a pound. His friend imme- 
 diately sent the money, tilling him not to think 
 of paying it back. Later on he repaid the 
 money. At last Mr. Brooks sent him to his 
 cement factory as a laborer, where he had been 
 ever since. 
 
 I had worked with him for a whole year. He 
 was perfectly honest, reliable, truthful, punc- 
 tual, and a hard worker. He used to send ten 
 shillings to his mother every Saturday regularly. 
 Not one among a hundred young men will show 
 so much regard and care for their superan- 
 nuated mothers. Model of a dutiful son is what 
 I call him. 
 
 His character had changed beyond recognition. 
 He had been working there for two years. It 
 was impossible for him to save money so long 
 as he had to send half of his regular wages to 
 his mother. There was no hope of advance- 
 ment. He had no time nor the means to look 
 for a more suitable and remunerative position. 
 
The Four Perjurers 173 
 
 He was small in size, dark in complexion, and 
 had one of his eyelids injured slightly. This 
 gave him a very queer and unpromising appear- 
 ance. Those who came in close contact with 
 him only could know his real worth and ability. 
 
 "How are you getting along, Shine?" I asked 
 him, after a handshake. 
 
 "All right," he said. But I could notice marks 
 of distress and despondency upon his fp-ce. These 
 two words did not express his real thoughts. His 
 expression was at variance with his feelings. 
 
 "Do you like your work any better, now that 
 you have been at it for about two years? You 
 must be accustomed to it by this time." 
 
 "Like my work? To be frank about it, it is 
 something more than I can do, nor could you, 
 if you had been with us all this while. After 
 you left us, the wages of my fellow-laborers 
 were raised from fourpence to fivepence an hour, 
 but not mine." 
 
 "But not yours? Why should not yours be 
 raised with the rest? Evidently they do not re- 
 gard you as efficient a laborer as the rest. 
 
 "On the contrary, I am as good a laborer as 
 any, even better than some of them." 
 
 "That is what everybody thinks of himself." 
 
 "If it was only my opinion of myself I would 
 not mention it to you nor to anyone else." 
 
 "Whose opinion is it, then?" 
 
 "Mr. Brown, the foreman, told me that I was 
 doing as much work as any one of the rest, and 
 advised me to go to the superintendent and ask 
 him to raise my wages to the same rate with 
 the rest," 
 
1.74 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 "Well, did you see the superintendent?" 
 
 "Yes ; I saw him and spoke to him about it." 
 
 "What did he say?" 
 
 "He said that he knew of my being a good 
 laborer; he was satisfied with my services, but 
 he expressed his regret that he could not raise 
 my wages." 
 
 "Did he give any reason for it?" 
 
 "None whatever." 
 
 "What do you think the reason is, then? Have 
 you an idea at all?" 
 
 "Why, the reason cannot be anything else than 
 because I am not an Englishman." 
 
 "It is a strange reason, indeed; nevertheless, 
 quite satisfactory for some, perhaps for the ma- 
 jority. After this you will know better, and 
 choose England for the country to be born in, 
 in case you make up your mind to come to this 
 world again. Then you have been paid, all this 
 while, at the rate of fourpence, while the rest get 
 fivepence per hour?" 
 
 "Not so lately. It is about two months since 
 we have been working on a new plan. The firm 
 contracts the work to be done with Chapman 
 (a bricklayer's wages forty shillings per week 
 on the old plan), for a certain amount of money. 
 He pays us at the rate of fivepence an hour, but 
 he makes us work at least twice as hard as wte 
 did before. At the end of the week we get 
 twenty-five shillings each, while he makes from 
 two hundred to three hundred shillings." 
 
 "Does the firm know that injustice is being 
 done to the laborers?" 
 
 "The firm does not care for the laborers who 
 
The Four Perjurers 175 
 
 are complaining; some already have quit work. 
 Unless some change is soon introduced more 
 favorable to the laborers it will be hard to in- 
 duce men to work. Every evening after the day's 
 work when I come home I feel tired and ex- 
 hausted." 
 
 "But, after all, we have to do the best we 
 can." 
 
 "Yes, but the best does not seem to consist in 
 being honest and scrupulous about your ways and 
 deeds ; this has been my experience, and I have 
 resolved upon changing my conduct." 
 
 "I hope it will be a change to the better." 
 
 His brother called him, whereupon he left me 
 and they went to their room without making it 
 clear to me as to what he meant by changing his 
 conduct. 
 
 I rented a room in the same house and im- 
 mediately began to look for a store in order to 
 go into business, but there was not to be found 
 any vacant store in the town, so I spoke to the 
 lady of the house where I was rooming if she 
 would speak to the landlord of the house to find 
 out if he would object to my using the front 
 room temporarily as a place of business. She 
 promised me to speak to him about it. 
 
 The next day the housekeeper told me that 
 the landlord said he would not make any objec- 
 tion to it. So I began to make purchases and fix 
 up the place. 
 
 The evening previous to the day upon which I 
 was going to open my temporary store I went 
 to Mr. Brooks' factory for a walk; I saw Shine 
 standing near the wharf with a big knife in his 
 
176 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 hand. "What's that knife for?" I asked him. 
 
 "Now, I will tell you the truth," he said. ",My 
 brother is inthe shanty to rob it and I am watch- 
 ing here. If 'anybody comes and takes notice of 
 it I will murder him." 
 
 I would not have expected anything of that 
 kind of him. It seemed to me too strange and 
 horrible to believe, but he spoke with all seri- 
 ousness and everything appeared to confirm what 
 he said. I began to tremble. In order to con- 
 ceal it from him I kept myself in motion by tak- 
 ing a few steps forward and then turning back- 
 wards. "Go home, hurry up, go home," he said. 
 "I did not know that you were such a coward. 
 If somebody comes here you will betray us, 
 quick! quick!" 
 
 I went direct home and thought that the best 
 way for me would be to leave Grays and go 
 somewhere else, but it was too late. 
 
 The next day I opened ray store, but the sec- 
 ond day the housekeeper had a letter from the 
 landlord telling her that he could not allow the 
 front room to be used as a business place. After 
 all, I had to close it. Then I went to Ockendan, 
 two miles from Grays. I rented a place there, in 
 order to conduct business for a time. I used to 
 go there daily in the morning, and come to Grays 
 late in the evening. 
 
 One day I noticed I had a half-sovereign gold 
 piece which did not look good. I showed it to 
 Shine. "Oh, it is very easy," he said. "Take 
 that half-sovereign and two good ones, and buy 
 postal orders for a pound and a half." 
 
The Four Perjurers 177 
 
 "I will try some day, when I go out of the 
 town," I said. 
 
 He used to go to London qujte often, and I 
 gave him money to buy such articles which I 
 needed in my business, because I was all alone 
 in the stoi-e. Sometimes he bought what I 
 wanted, other times brought the money back or 
 a postal order or more, instead of the money, 
 telling me that he did not happen to go to Cler- 
 kenwell Street, or that the article asked for could 
 not be obtained. 
 
 "Did you pass it?" he asked me a few days 
 after. 
 
 "No," I said; "I have not been out of the 
 town yet. 
 
 "Now, there is nothing to be afraid of," he 
 said. "If they take notice of it, they will simply 
 tell you that it does not seem to be a good coin 
 and ask you to give another one in place of it. 
 This is the worst that can happen." 
 
 One day, being out of the town, "I tried to 
 pass, it in the prescribed way. The clerk took 
 notice of it, and made quite a big fuss about it. 
 
 "Where did you get this?" he asked me. 
 
 "I cannot tell you where or from whom," I 
 said. 
 
 "Have you got any more of them?" he asked. 
 
 "No," I said; "that is the only one, so far as 
 I know." 
 
 He examined my purse, but found none; then 
 he took my name, address, business place, etc. 
 A man in the office looked as if he put a ques- 
 tion to the clerk, who led him close to the wall 
 and read some written matter hung on top of 
 
lyS The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 others. I could not tell what it was until every- 
 thing came out, namely, that a number of spuri- 
 ous half-sovereigns had already been passed, and, 
 consequently, it must have been a circular sent 
 by the secret service men, probably one to every 
 post office as a warning. This seemed to be the 
 reason why I was so closely questioned and ex- 
 amined. He kept the half-sovereign and let me 
 off. 
 
 It will no doubt be urged against me as to why 
 did I attempt to pass the coin, knowing it to be 
 bad. 
 
 The following two circumstances will serve as 
 an answer to this question, and, I believe, greatly 
 extenuate the offence. 
 
 I. It was some time ago, before my Mediter- 
 ranean trip, while walking together. Shine and 
 myself came upon a crowd at the corner of High 
 and Union Streets, where there was a vacant 
 lot on which auction sales were held now and 
 then. We joined the crowd. A man, having 
 some watches for sale, was seen to be actively 
 engaged in explaining the good qualities of his 
 ware. "A timepiece, gentlemen," he said; "stem- 
 winder; the case is guaranteed for twenty-five 
 years ; indeed, it lasts a life-time. These watches 
 were put on the market but recently, the regular 
 retail price being five shillings. The company 
 has adopted this way of advertising their goods. 
 A limited number of these watches will be sold 
 at a reduced price in order to acquaint the pub- 
 lic with them. I am authorized by the company 
 to charge for these watches the nominal price of 
 one shilling apiece; this is simply giving them 
 
The Four Perjurers 179 
 
 away, a very rare chance indeed to own a good 
 watch." He wound one of them, exposing it to 
 their view at a distance, but did not hand it to 
 them for a close examination. Up went forth- 
 with over a dozen hands, some holding a shil- 
 ling, others one of a larger denomination, in ex- 
 pectation of getting the change with the watch. 
 
 "Now, gentlemen," said the man, "I will first 
 give you a card for your money, and then ex- 
 change it with a watch." 
 
 There were two or three boys among the 
 buyers, but he refused to take their money. 
 After the collection he told the card-holders 
 to come close to him; then he exchanged each 
 card with a watch enclosed in a paper box as 
 quickly as he could. The majority of the buy- 
 ers did not even look at it; they put it in their 
 pockets and went away. But 'I became very 
 much interested to know what kind of watches 
 they were. While looking round, I noticed one 
 taking his out. I watched him for a few sec- 
 onds, having my eyes fixed upon the dial and the 
 hands; in the meanwhile he had commenced to 
 wind it. This was enough; I understood all. 
 "A watch, a good timepiece" for the world where 
 there will be time no more. It was only a toy 
 watch, having no mainspring, no wheels but one, 
 and a click, the crown and the hands being con- 
 nected to the wheel. Winding the watch would 
 only turn the hands round. I turned back to see 
 if the faker was still selling his watches. He 
 was gone. 
 
 I had seen many street venders offering jew- 
 elry for sale, claiming their silver-plated nickle 
 
i8o The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 articles were solid silver and gold-filled or gilt 
 ones, gold. 
 
 "Why doesn't the Government prohibit the sale 
 of spurious articles?" I asked Shine. 
 
 "The Government always aims at reducing the 
 number of the laws as much as possible," he 
 said. "Things like that are left to the judgment 
 or discretion of the individual. People are not 
 compelled to buy such articles. What they need 
 is a little common-sense, and if they are cheated 
 once in a while it will not entail a very great loss 
 to them, but, on the contrary, make them more 
 experienced and wiser; those who bought fake 
 watches a little while ago cannot be caught in the 
 same or a similar trap." 
 
 The selling of a gold-plated article as solid 
 gold, and the passing of a gilt coin, are both 
 wrong in an equal degree. There is not the 
 slightest difference between the two acts, viewed 
 in themselves. It is only when they are con- 
 sidered with reference to the counter-effects of 
 each, upon the maintenance or preservation of 
 society, that the insignificance of the former and 
 the enormity of the latter become evident. But 
 thirteeen years ago I was incapable of going so 
 deep into the matter. The only inference I 
 could draw was to the effect that the hold of the 
 law in England was loose upon its subject, and 
 that probably the "greater freedom or liberty" 
 so often spoken of and attributed to countries 
 more advanced and civilized had reference to 
 this and like cases. 
 
 Such fakers are invariably punished in our 
 country by the Government when brought to its 
 
The Four Perjurers i8i 
 
 notice, nor is there need for a law; the judge 
 will enact one to suit the occasion. 
 
 2. But, recurring to bad coins, the case is en- 
 tirely different in our country. I hardly believe 
 that the Government collects the old coins in 
 order to melt and re-stamp them, and if it does, 
 must be on a very small scale. There are many 
 coins that have been put in circulation for fifty 
 or sixty years, and some even more than this. 
 A good many of them are naturally so worn out 
 that one can hardly tell what they are; they can 
 only be known by their size, but never from 
 the stamped characters. Once in a while a 
 herald goes through the streets crying out that 
 all old and worn out coins should pass, and if, 
 anyone refuses to accept them he will be fined. 
 
 The herald's warning, however, often means 
 that the Government officers have some bad 
 money, and are going to circulate it. The store- 
 keepers are in this way compelled to accept it, 
 and try to get rid of it in dim light or by mix- 
 ing them with good ones. Still others give them 
 to simple, timid countrymen, under threat of ar- 
 rest and fine. Nor in England was the case any 
 better years ago, quoting from the "Essays: 
 Moral, Political and Aesthetic," by Mr. Spen- 
 cer. "Respecting the trade of past time in Eng- 
 land, there was scarce a shopkeeper who had not 
 a bag of spurious or debased coin, from which 
 he gave change whenever he could ; and that men, 
 even the most honest, triumphed in their skill 
 in getting rid of bad money." ("The Morals of 
 Trade," page 137.) 
 
 I thought that in England, as well as in every 
 
1 82 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 country, there must have been thousands of bad 
 coins circulating, and that he who should hap- 
 pen to be the unlucky owner of such a piece at 
 any time would try to pass it as best as he could. 
 The reader must remember how W. D. Anthony 
 
 passed a spurious quarter in P . I never 
 
 took it as a thing of rare occurrence, but ex- 
 pected to get more of it now and then, now that 
 I had gone into business. What is immediately 
 to follow, however, was not entirely due to the 
 passing of this one alone. It turned out to be 
 much more complicated than I ever could think 
 of, as will be seen. 
 
 I rented a store in Grays, and six rooms in 
 connection with it. I reserved the two for my- 
 self. SKine wanted one for himself, his brother 
 being away from the town for some weeks, and 
 a family of three wanted the remaining three. 
 I let the family have the four rooms at the same 
 price they agreed to pay for the three rooms, 
 in order to keep Shine out of the house, because 
 I was afraid lest he should bring trouble upon 
 me. He rented a room somewhere in Clarence 
 Street, but I never went to his room. 
 
 About three weeks after I went into business, 
 three detectives came to my store and told me 
 that they had a warrant for my arrest for uter- 
 ing counterfeit coins. In reality, I do not know 
 what they said, but they must have said so, be- 
 cause I knew just a little English, and under- 
 stood no more than the last two words, "coun- 
 terfeit coins." 
 
 I denied the charge as best I could ; neverthe- 
 less I knew that I had attempted to pass a bad 
 
The Four Perjurers 183 
 
 half-sovereign, but did not know if it was all 
 the charge, or something else. When they be- 
 gan to search my store I believed it was more 
 than this. 
 
 "Here, I've got one," said one of the detec- 
 tives ; "this will do." They continued the search 
 of my store and bedroom for about two hours; 
 then took some tools and articles and went to- 
 gether to the police station. After a while Shine 
 was brought there. We were taken to London 
 and arraigned before a magistrate. 
 
 "Do you know what the charge is?" I asked 
 Shine, as soon as I got a chance to speak to him, 
 for we were kept separate, which seems to be the 
 general rule. 
 
 "Uttering counterfeit coins," he said. 
 
 "What do they mean by it ?" I asked again. 
 " 'Utter' means to speak or express, so far as I 
 know. I expected the charge to be either pass- 
 ing or making." 
 
 "It means neither the one nor the other," he 
 said, "but something between the two, namely, 
 passing a low-priced coin at a higher value by 
 altering or coloring it or something of that kind." 
 
 Now it is evident that he was mistaken. His 
 answer was far from giving the correct meaning 
 of the word, it being merely the description of 
 the way as to how the coins were made. Later 
 on I saw one of them divided into its constituent 
 parts — a silver sixpenny piece, of which one side 
 is exactly like that of a half-sovereign, had a 
 thin sheet of metal stamped the "George and 
 Dragon" on, and soldered upon the unlike side, 
 and then gold-plated all over. 
 
184 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 In due time we were tried before a jury. The 
 jury pronounced Shine not guilty, and Baron 
 (under a different name) guilty. So Shine was 
 discharged, and I got twelve months (actually 
 ten and a half months) imprisonment. 
 
 I had served more than half of the term when 
 I got a letter from the brother of Shine express- 
 ing a desire to see me, whereupon a pass was 
 sent to him. 
 
 "Have you heard the news?" was the first 
 question he put to me. 
 
 "It is impossible for us to hear anything that 
 may occur in any part of the world. What news 
 do you mean?" 
 
 "My brother was drowned in the Thames 
 about a month ago." 
 
 After telling me the story of the death, the 
 discovery of the body, and the cost of the burial, 
 etc., he took a gilt coin out of his pocket and 
 showed it to me from a distance of about two 
 yards, the space of a double grating that separ- 
 ated us. "It is a South African coin; I made 
 it," he said. 
 
 I could see nothing more than the mere out- 
 line of it, nevertheless it tended to strengthen my 
 suspicion of his brother's being the originator 
 of it. 
 
 "Was your brother ever in the same business ?" 
 I asked him. 
 
 "Yes," he said, with an air of pride indicatory 
 of the skill and ingenuity of his brother. "He 
 made those half-sovereigns." 
 
 "Did he not have anything in his room that 
 would have furnished a clue to the detectives 
 
The Four Perjurers 185 
 
 who must have searched his room?" 
 
 "My brother told me that he had four bat- 
 teries, which, by the way, had not cost him 
 anything. He went one Sunday evening to Mr. 
 Brooks' factory, and, seeing them near the win- 
 dow of a boiler-room, broke the glass of the 
 window and brought them home. A few half- 
 sovereigns of his make, several pieces of sheet 
 metal having the "George and Dragon" stamped 
 on and cut to size just ready to solder, were ly- 
 ing about, but, luckilv, the detectives had not 
 searched his room. He kept them in the closet 
 ('cupboard,' as it is called in England), but they 
 did not even open the door. Had they done this, 
 he would have pleaded guilty ; you would not be 
 here nor he in the grave. His good luck in the 
 end turned to bad. I wish he were put in jail, 
 in which case he would be living now. I do not 
 know how to break the news to my mother. 
 This is the most difficult task for me to per- 
 form." 
 
 "Do you know what metal he used to stamp 
 the 'George and Dragon' on?" 
 
 "Sheet brass." 
 
 "Did he make any alteration upon the six- 
 penny pieces?" 
 
 "None whatever; my brother was wondering 
 how everything went favorable with him. He 
 told me that he used the newest and the best 
 sixpenny pieces he could obtain, and soldered the 
 additional part upon the coin without filing or 
 even scratching it. The mutilated coin found in 
 your possession could not have anything to do 
 with the case." 
 
1 86 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 "Did he tell you how he had managed to pass 
 one in the main post office at Grays ?" 
 
 "You already know very well how my brother 
 used to buy a postal order for half a pound every 
 week, and send it to mother; he had been doing 
 this for about two years. The clerk knew him 
 very well, so that when he offered one of his 
 own make she took and put it away without 
 even looking at it, as she had no reason to sus- 
 pect him. But you do not seem to know," he 
 went on, "of another one which he had passed 
 in the High Street post office. Here it is where 
 cunning and wit come in. My brother went to 
 the window and asked for a postal order for 
 ten shillings, giving the clerk one pound in gold ; 
 as soon as he got the change in gold, he dropped 
 it in his pocket (one especially made for that 
 purpose), and, having the bad one in his hand, 
 first pretended to examine it, and then turned 
 to the clerk. 'This half-sovereign does not look 
 good,' he said. 'Will you look at it, please ?' Ts 
 this really the one that I gave you?' asked the 
 clerk. 'Yes,' he said ; 'I have no other money in 
 my possession. I get a pound per week in wages, 
 and send half of it to my mother' ; and he handed 
 out his purse so that the clerk could examine it. 
 Whereupon the clerk gave him another one and 
 kept the bad one." 
 
 The time was up ; we could not carry our con- 
 versation any further. He said that he was 
 going direct to South Africa. He bade me good- 
 bye, and went. 
 
 I went to my cell and began to think the mat- 
 ter over. On the day when the three detectives 
 
• The Four Perjurers 187 
 
 searched my store and room, but found practi- 
 cally nothing, and heard me say to the lady in the 
 house that I expected to be back, they felt very 
 much disappointed. They arrested Shine, but 
 did not search his room, fearing they should find 
 something, no matter how small, just enough to 
 prevent them from making him testify against 
 me. This was why they made no mention of a 
 gilt farthing found in his possession, and con- 
 cealed every case to which Shine was to be 
 held solely accountable, telling him repeatedly 
 that they knew he was innocent, that they ex- 
 pected him to tell the truth and get discharged; 
 nor did he disappoint them. 
 
 There were no less than eight witnesses against 
 us, three postal orders, two of them cashed by 
 myself, and a third under the signature of "Peter 
 Smith," also several spurious coins. 
 
 The first witness testified that the coins in 
 question were not genuine. 
 
 The second witness said that the two postal 
 orders cashed under my signature were in my 
 handwriting. 
 
 The third witness said that I had cashed the 
 two postal orders in the post office under her 
 charge. 
 
 The fourth witness said that the third postal 
 order, cashed by Peter Smith or under that name, 
 was bought by Shine at the post office of which 
 she had charge. 
 
 It was assumed by the court that Shine had 
 bought the postal order for me, that I must 
 have been afraid to sign my name to it, and 
 
1 88 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 that I had it cashed to Peter Smith (a witness 
 against me). 
 
 Shine denied that he had bought the postal 
 order in question, while Peter Smith, the fifth 
 witness, testified in favor of me, in spite of the 
 court's expectation to the contrary, by telling 
 that he did not sign his name to it nor cash it. 
 
 The sixth witness said that a counterfeit half- 
 sovereign was discovered in the cash on a cer- 
 tain Saturday evening at the main post office in 
 Grays, Essex, but was unable to tell whom she 
 got it from. 
 
 The seventh witness said that the two postal 
 orders cashed under my signature were bought 
 of her by Shine and myself. 
 
 Shine admitted buying them of her, but he did 
 not make it clear if he was alone or had some- 
 one else with him. If I had been with him, or 
 known that those two postal orders were bought 
 in exchange for bad money, I would not have 
 signed my name to them. Shine had given me 
 others at different times, and I had used them 
 in making remittance for goods ordered by mail. 
 I had cashed those two in the very same town 
 where I had been conducting business, after hav- 
 ing kept them for several weeks and been un- 
 able to make use of them in the same way. 
 
 The reader must be well acquainted with the 
 eighth witness. This was the only evidence 
 against me, nor did I deny my attempt to pass 
 one; the rest were either too insignificant or 
 forcibly brought to bear upon me. 
 
 They had found in my possession the follow- 
 ing articles: 
 
The Four Perjurers 189 
 
 1. A silver sixpenny piece having the same 
 side which the counterfeit coins had the "George 
 and Dragon" soldered on, turned on a lathe or 
 filed down, this being the one upon the discovery 
 of which one of the detectives had exclaimed, 
 "Here, I've got one, that will do." It was con- 
 sidered the most convincing proof against me, 
 yet I learned from young Shine that his brother 
 had made no alternations whatever upon the 
 original coin, no turning, no filing. 
 
 There are many people in almost every coun- 
 try who prefer to wear a breast or scarf pin, or a 
 charm made of a coin to any other design. Jew- 
 elers turn thousands of coins in a single year 
 into jewelry. The sixpence in question, which 
 I had had for a number of months, must have 
 been worn by a country swain or lass as a piece 
 of jewelry, and put in circulation again. It was 
 very easy to pass it if I had attempted so to 
 do, because it was a genuine coin, and the side 
 having the queen's bust stamped was unimpaired. 
 A sixpence has about the size and a little above 
 the value of an American dime. After all, as 
 long as the coin found in my possession was 
 mutilated, while counterfeit ones were made of 
 unmutilated ones, the nullification of their 
 strongest proof against me admits of no dispute. 
 
 2. A piece of silver anode. It was assumed 
 to be the sheet metal upon which the "George 
 and Dragon" had been stamped. This was the 
 second strongest proof against me. One part of 
 it had been taken to the Hint and the "George 
 and Dragon" stamped upon. Why did they not 
 (lo it with my own tools? Because it was im- 
 
190 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 possible. The silver anode was so thick that 
 even the one stamped by the up-to-date die and 
 machinery available in the Mint was so bad that 
 it would have been impossible to pass one made 
 with it. But again I learned from young Shine 
 that it was made o£ brass. It must have been 
 very thin, probably only a shade thicker than 
 common tinfoil, so as to take a good impression, 
 not requiring the application of a strong pres- 
 sure, a thing entirely out of his reach; and then, 
 why use silver? Brass is just as good, so long 
 as the finished one was to be gold-plated. 
 
 Now this proof also goes to the wind, unless 
 I had the secret of changing silver into brass; 
 but in that case I would have preferred the re- 
 verse process, and made some silver out of brass. 
 
 3. A dynamo; proves nothing. 
 
 4. A spark-coil of my own make; such an in- 
 strument has no application whatever in elec- 
 troplating. 
 
 5. A jar of gold-bath; proves nothing. 
 
 6. A jar of diluted sulphuric acid, having 
 lead cylinders immersed in it. I had been ex- 
 perimenting upon it with a view to making a 
 storage battery which was not completed yet. 
 This is irrelevant to the case. 
 
 7. A bobbin of insulated copper wire; ridicu- 
 lous. 
 
 I had nothing else in the line of electricity but 
 a copy of Alexander Watt's "Electrometallurgy." 
 It could have easily been shown that the direc- 
 tions contained in the book were adequate to en- 
 able one to electroplate sixpenny pieces, but 
 somehow they overlooked this fact, and in con- 
 
The Four Perjurers 191 
 
 sequence the book was not confiscated. Had I 
 been a dealer in electrical goods, it seemed as if 
 my store would have been put upon wheels, with 
 all its contents, and give a regular exhibition in 
 the court. 
 
 After hearing the testimony of the witnesses, 
 I was called to the stand. 
 
 The presiding magistrate appeared to be a 
 sportive man ; nay, he proved himself to be such 
 when I pleaded not guilty. "Not guilty!" he 
 said, and laughed; and everyone in the court 
 joined him. I did not like to be interrupted like 
 that, nor would he have liked it if he were me; 
 therefore, as a precaution, I told the interpreter 
 to ask the magistrate if I would be given suffi- 
 cient time for my defence, so that I could make 
 it fully, and without undue interruptions until 
 I was through. 
 
 "I do not have to translate it," said the inter- 
 preter, "because that is just why you are here. 
 You will have to say all that you know to de- 
 fend yourself." 
 
 Whereupon I commenced my defence. "I 
 have been in Grays for only about four months. 
 I came here from Candia, a city in the island 
 of Crete, where I had been engaged in taking 
 photographs. There are to be found in Candia, 
 Greek, French, Turkish and English coins in cir- 
 culation. Occasionally one is paid also in coins 
 belonging to other countries. Just before leav- 
 ing Candia I went to a money-changer and had 
 all my money exchanged for English coins — 
 sovereigns and half-sovereigns — and brought 
 them here with me. There are no banks there, 
 
192 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 so as to enable one to get a check for his money. 
 If I did not get the spurious coin here in this 
 country, I may have brought it from there." 
 
 Here I made a stop, and beckoned to the inter- 
 preter to translate it. 
 
 The interpreter had scarcely uttered a dozen 
 words when the magistrate interrupted him. 
 "Tell him we don't want that ; tell him we don't 
 want that," he shouted with a frown. Where- 
 upon the interpreter omitted the middle part, and 
 gave an end by translating the last sentence, 
 namely, "I may have brought it from Candia." 
 
 "Oh, is that what he means ? Is that what he 
 means?" said the magistrate, and left his chair 
 exhibiting marks of restlessness. 
 
 My defence would have taken no less than 
 thirty minutes, if I was let alone until through. 
 I would have mentioned my recently made pur- 
 chases from an importer, Wollridge & Co., 92 
 Queen Street, London, E. C, the three months' 
 rent which I had paid in advance, and other 
 transactions, asking them to make inquiries if I 
 had made any attempt to pass spurious coins, or 
 if any complaints had been made in Ockendan 
 and Grays, where I had conducted business ; next, 
 naturally, I would have compared the mutilated 
 sixpence found in my possession with the spuri- 
 ous coins, in. order to mark out any dissimilarity 
 that was noticeable between them. I might have 
 asked them to warm one of them and wipe oflf 
 the solder, in order to see if the sixpenny pieces 
 of which the half-sovereigns were made had also 
 been mutilated in like manner. Had this test 
 been carried out, the result would have nullified 
 
The Four Perjurers 193 
 
 what was assumed to be the most glaring proof 
 against me, because the others would have been 
 found to be perfect. 
 
 "Ask him what he wants," I said to the inter- 
 preter, expecting him to translate it; but he did 
 not translate. 
 
 "Give him that sixpence and ask him where 
 ■he got it," said the magistrate. 
 
 "I cannot tell where or from whom," I said. 
 "I must have got it in trade." 
 
 "Hum!" said the magistrate. "Well, I don't 
 care," he added. "Give it to the jurors. Let 
 them examine it," and he sat upon his chair. 
 
 He could not have spoken a better truth in 
 his life, for the simple reason that true and 
 false are not susceptible of degrees. A state- 
 ment is either true or false ; there is no tertium 
 quid of which it admits. It would seem as if 
 the jurors were only scarecrows there. He pro- 
 nounced the verdict before I opened my mouth. 
 His restlessness, frownings, sarcastic expressions 
 and interruptions made me forget my case; in 
 fact, I laid it all aside. My whole thought was 
 concentrated upon the person of the magistrate. 
 I began to meditate, wondering how that man 
 came to be elected to office, instead of being put 
 on a coal wagon. I could not think of a better 
 place. That he was ill-placed in the magisterial 
 chair, I could see well enough. It is not be- 
 fitting a magistrate to misbehave himself during 
 a trial. He should keep within the prescribed 
 limits of his office. 
 
 Next my silver anode was brought forward, 
 also the part of it which had been sent to the 
 
194 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 Mint, and the "George and Dragon" stamped on. 
 It is well known to the reader that the same 
 part of the spurious coins was made of brass, 
 and I had no sheet brass as yet in my store. 
 However, I did not even open my mouth any 
 more. I let them alone, to pull the case to any 
 direction they pleased. 
 
 Shine's defence has already been mentioned; 
 he denied the charge of the fourth witness and 
 admitted that of the seventh. 
 
 "What did you find in Shine's possession?" 
 asked the magistrate. 
 
 "Nothing," said one of the detectives. 
 
 This was a lie, or, considering the circum- 
 stances, perjury; the right answer would have 
 been as follows: 
 
 1. We did not search his room, and found 
 nothing. No wonder! 
 
 2. We found a gilt farthing in his possession, 
 but we are not going to mention it. 
 
 3. He has passed a spurious half-sovereign in 
 the High Street post office, a sub-station, in a 
 very daring manner. We have left no stone un- 
 turned to hold "Baron" accountable to it, but 
 hopelessly failed; in the end, we preferred not 
 to make any mention about it, because we know 
 "by intuition" (some men also have woman's 
 intuition) that "Baron" is guilty and Shine not 
 guilty. But for the requirement of the law to 
 pass the accused through certain formalities, we 
 would have transported "Baron" to a prison- 
 cell direct from his store, and laid no hands upon 
 innocent Shine. 
 
 Next the magistrate made a long harangue 
 
The Four Perjurers 195 
 
 lasting no less than half an hour, but I have not 
 the least idea what he said; it was not trans- 
 lated, and I suppose it was addressed to the jury. 
 But he was no longer the same frolicsome man; 
 he looked very serious, spoke in a solemn tone, 
 deported himself gravely ; he was indeed changed 
 so much as to be almost unrecognizable. Never- 
 theless this was a change for the better. Now 
 he had the true aspect of a magistrate, but a 
 true magistrate is the one who has the appear- 
 ance without being a dissembler or hypocrite. 
 
 Neither of my two applications for a second 
 trial or making of a petition to the Martian am- 
 bassador was granted. Thus I had to wait for 
 eleven years until the Inscrutable Woman gave 
 me another chance to speak, and here it is. 
 
 About two weeks before my acquittal I noticed 
 a new Discharged Prisoners' Aid Society card 
 upon the desk in my cell. There had been an 
 old one all the time hanging on the wall; this 
 was a special one. I thought that a man who 
 has the secret of the transmutation of metals 
 needs no help, much less that of a Discharged 
 Prisoners' Aid Society. I put the new card 
 behind the old one, and made no application. I 
 was discharged on the twenty-eight of October, 
 1900. 
 
 I had already planned crossing the Atlantic in 
 order to give the benefit of my secret to Uncle 
 Sam, but, unluckily, I have failed to accomplish 
 anything in this line for a whole decade. 
 
196 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 CHAPTER VI. 
 
 "business is business." 
 
 "Get place and wealth, if possible with grace; 
 If not, by any means get wealth and place." 
 
 Thursday, November 9, 1900, at four o'clock 
 in the afternoon, the steamer "New York" began 
 to move. Southampton was receding. 
 
 Farewell, England, proud conqueror of the 
 world ! Farewell, Old World, the cradle of civi- 
 lization! Farewell, land of my birth, wild fan- 
 cies, childish dreams and youthful errors ! After 
 a stormy life of a quarter of a century I leave 
 you all behind ; aye, I bury you in the sea of ob- 
 livion. The rest of my life will be lived away, 
 beyond this wide, wide belt of water. A new 
 life in a new country, if it is given to a mortal — 
 a straw over the ruffled sea — ^to draw the plan of 
 his life. 
 
 The next morning no land was within sight. 
 The sky, like a huge, multifold tent, spread over 
 and around us, had put, it would seem, a lirilit 
 to our progress in all directions. But at the 
 approach of the steamer each layer would mir- 
 aculously rise in succession in the front, and 
 ^ cprresponding one descend at the r^ar, tq 
 
"Business Is Business" 197 
 
 keep us, as it were, out of the sight of some 
 pursuing foe. 
 
 On Saturday, the eighteenth of November, the 
 long-looked-for land became visible. In the even- 
 ing the Statue of Liberty was within sight, but 
 we had to sleep one more night in the steamer 
 before we were allowed to put foot on the land 
 of liberty. 
 
 Sunday, at noon, I found myself in the New 
 World, in a country where George Washington 
 had lived, the boy who could not speak a lie, 
 the general who had conquered the armies of the 
 most powerful nation of the world, the presi- 
 dent who had ruled over a virgin nation; the 
 country whence missionaries come, pious, devout 
 men of grave deportment, truthful and reliable, 
 who inculcate the duty of unconditional ve- 
 racity — ^"Let your communication be yea, yea, 
 nay, nay; and that which is over and above this 
 is of evil." 
 
 They are far from countenacing hedonism, 
 eudemonism or pragmatism. The doctrine of the 
 justification of a means by the end has no place 
 in their teaching. They are true Christians, fol- 
 lowers of Christ and mystics to a certain degree, 
 as every genuine Christian can not but be; be- 
 lief in the inspiration of the Bible, and impHcit 
 obedience to its dogmas being the two corner- 
 stones of Christianity. 
 
 They have done incalculable good to our coun- 
 try in general and our nation in particular. If 
 expression of my gratitude in appreciation of 
 benefits thus conferred upon us have any worth, 
 howsoever little it may be, by way of a paltry 
 
198 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 recompense, I do not hesitate for a moment 
 to extend my thanks from the depth of my heart 
 to all those who have contributed to the cause, 
 directly or indirectly. 
 
 I had always entertained a high regard for 
 missionaries, nor without good reasons. I had 
 learned a good many valuable things worth know- 
 ing. Now I was in their country, surrounded by 
 missionaries or missionary-like Americans, and 
 expected my progress to be by leaps and bounds. 
 
 Progress can be made by two ways, emulation 
 and opposition. I little thought that mine would 
 be mainly by the latter method. I resolved upon 
 giving preference to the furnished room or the 
 boarding house conducted by an American 
 family, even if it should cost more. 
 
 I immediately rented a room in Washington 
 Street for one week only, because it was a dirty 
 street, expecting to get acquainted with the city 
 and move to a better and cleaner neighborhood. 
 
 Next Wednesday I saw a position for a watch- 
 maker advertised in the World. I applied for it. 
 The store was located at 884 Ninth Avenue. 
 
 "Is the position advertised for a watchmaker 
 still open?" I asked. 
 
 "Yes; where have you worked before?" 
 
 "Not in this country; I landed in New York 
 but three days ago." 
 
 "What is your nationality?" 
 
 "Martian." 
 
 "Can you repair clocks ?" ■ 
 
 "Certainly." 
 
 "Have you got tools?" 
 
 "I have some ; the rest I will buy," 
 
"Business is Business" 199 
 
 "Well, it does not matter much; I have got a 
 full set of tools here on the bench; you can use 
 them. Come to work to-morrow morning at 
 eight o'clock." 
 
 He took my name and address, and I went out 
 to get ready. 
 
 The next morning I went to the store ready 
 to work. 
 
 "You do not seem to have received my postal 
 card," he said, as soon as I entered. "My old 
 employee came back yesterday, right after you 
 left, and I re-engaged him because I knew him 
 very well; he has worked for me a number of 
 years." 
 
 I went out and bought a copy of the World. 
 He still wanted a watchmaker. The same ad- 
 vertisement appeared in the two succeeding 
 issues of the same paper. As to the postal card, 
 I have not received it yet. 
 
 Well, I said to myself, probably this man 
 was too busy to read George Washington's story, 
 or forgot it. Let me see a few more. 
 
 A second one said that he would let me know 
 by to-morrow ; a third one by Monday ; a fourth 
 one by Thursday, etc. It is about ten years ago 
 now, but I have not heard from them yet. 
 
 "You might be the most honest man in the 
 world," said a jeweler in Harlem one day, "but 
 so long as you can furnish no city reference I 
 cannot engage you." 
 
 Now this man, I said to myself, shall have 
 a medal given to him. A bold truth is always 
 preferable to a modest lie. I know now what 
 
200 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 is required of me. I will try to do something 
 else for a while. 
 
 I noticed in the paper a number of employ- 
 ment bureaus advertising for help. One of them 
 claimed to have been an old-established mercan- 
 tile agency, and capable of obtaining all kinds of 
 positions, located at Washington Street, Brook- 
 lyn. I had a good distance to go, having rented 
 a room at East Thirtieth Street; yet I selected 
 this bureau ai the best one among the advertised. 
 
 Monday morning I went there, and after a 
 little while approached the window where ap- 
 plications were being made. 
 
 "What can I do for you ?" said a man, walking 
 towards me. 
 
 "Can you get a position for me?" 
 
 "What is your trade? What can you do?" 
 
 "I am a watchmaker by trade. I have failed 
 to obtain a position because I came to this coun- 
 try only four weeks ago, and am, consequently, 
 unable to furnish references. It is not necessary 
 that I should obtain a position in this line; any 
 other kind will do." 
 
 "We can get you a situation even in your line,, 
 but it is liable to take rather a longer time, and 
 you may not be disposed to wait very long. We 
 have others that are quite ready. How would 
 you like to be a night watchman; wages, sixteen 
 dollars a week?" 
 
 This was a much higher salary, to begin with, 
 than I expected. "That will do," I said; "how 
 much is your fee ?" 
 
 "Ten dollars, in advance. Next Friday even- 
 ing, at six o'clock, you will be on duty." 
 
"Business is Business" 201 
 
 "But if you should fail to get it for me, what 
 then?" 
 
 "We will get you another one. We guarantee 
 to ob'fain a position for you. Upon failure to 
 do so, we shall be compelled by the law to re- 
 fund your money." Then he read the law, which 
 was printed on the back of the receipt. Where- 
 upon I gave him ten dollars, and got a receipt 
 for it. I came home, having full confidence in 
 what he said. 
 
 On Friday I went to the bureau, and presented 
 myself at the window. 
 
 "We got a letter from the party to-day," he 
 said, "who regrets that he will be unable to come 
 here this week; but next Wednesday, sure, at 
 three o'clock in the afternoon, he will be here. 
 So you come at two o'clock, and in case he ar- 
 rives here a little earlier he will not have to wait 
 for you, or, what is still worse, engage somebody 
 else." 
 
 "All right," I said; "I will wait until then," 
 and went out, because I still believed what he 
 said to be true. 
 
 Sunday my attention was drawn to a number 
 of advertisements by fortune-tellers. They called 
 themselves "Professor," a high-sounding title, 
 but if women, "Madame." I thought that if 
 only half of what they claimed to be capable of 
 telling of one's destiny were true, I would con- 
 sider them as real miracle-workers. There were 
 fortune-tellers in our country, too, although 
 comparatively very rare, but I had never read 
 or heard of them pretending to know what are, 
 in general, believed to be known to none but 
 
202 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 the Omniscient Being, and people would not give 
 any credence to them ; they were considered to be 
 swindlers. 
 
 Could it be that fortune-telling had kept a for- 
 ward pace parallel with the sciences, inventions 
 and discoveries to such a degree of perfection as 
 to be reckoned one among the many professions 
 affording the means of making an honest living? 
 But progress in this direction seemed to me, 
 judging from the advertisements, to have been at 
 an incomparably higher rate than in any other 
 direction, and reached, in fact, its limit, admit- 
 ting of no further progress. This I hardly could 
 believe; so I made up my mind to investigate 
 the matter. I cut out the following advertise- 
 ment from among the thirty-six others of the 
 same kind, and all in one paper: 
 
 PRO. EDGAR DOBSON, 
 Most Reliable, Longest Established 
 CLAIRVOYANT. 
 He stands alone in his wonderful power of reading 
 the future of human kind. Born with a double veil. 
 EDUCATED IN OCCULT MYSTERIES AND 
 HINDOO PHILOSOPHY IN EGYPT 
 AND INDIA. 
 IF YOU ARE GOING TO CONSULT A LIFE 
 READER, WHY NOT SEE 
 THE BEST? 
 As the best is the cheapest in the end. 
 PROF. DOBSON ALWAYS 
 TELLS YOU THE 
 TRUTH. 
 He fully appreciates that there are thousands of 
 anxious ones only too eager to consult a good, honest 
 and reliable clairvoyant if they really felt sure of re- 
 ceiving complete satisfaction. Yet they hesitate and 
 are perplexed whom to consult, in fear of spending 
 
'Business is Business" 203 
 
 their money without receiving any benefit. He knows 
 of no better way to help you in deciding than to sub- 
 mit to your careful consideration THE FOLLOWING 
 HONEST PROPOSITION: 
 
 READ CAREFULLY! 
 A BONA-FIDE GUARANTEE. 
 
 I DO HEREBY SOLEMNLY AGREE AND 
 GUARANTEE TO MAKE YOU NO CHARGE IF 
 I FAIL TO CALL YOU BY NAME IN FULL;. 
 ALSO FRIENDS, ENEMIES, RIVALS; WHOM 
 AND WHEN YOU WILL MARRY; I GIVE 
 NEVER-FAILING ADVICE UPON ALL MAT- 
 TERS OF LIFE, SUCH AS LOVE, COURTSHIP, 
 MARRIAGE, DIVORCE, BUSINESS, LAWSUITS, 
 SPECULATIONS AND TRANSACTIONS OF ALL 
 KINDS. I NEVER FAIL TO REUNITE THE 
 SEPARATED, CAUSE SPEEDY AND HAPPY 
 MARRIAGES, OVERCOME ENEMIES, RIVALS, 
 LOVERS' QUARRELS, EVIL HABITS, STUM- 
 BLING BLOCKS AND BAD LUCK OF ALL 
 KINDS. I LIFT YOU OUT OF YOUR SORROW 
 AND TROUBLE, AND START YOU ON THE 
 PATH OF HAPPINESS AND PROSPERITY. 
 
 I FURTHER GUARANTEE AND PROMISE TO 
 MAKE YOU NO CHARGE UNLESS YOU FIND 
 ME SUPERIOR TO ANY OTHER CLAIRVOY- 
 ANT YOU EVER CONSULTED. THERE IS NO 
 HOPE SO FOND OR WISH SO GREAT THAT I 
 CANNOT ACCOMPLISH FOR YOU. I GUARAN- 
 TEE SUCCESS WHERE ALL OTHER CLAIR- 
 VOYANTS FAIL. I DO GUARANTEE TO TELL 
 IT ALL TO YOU BEFORE YOU UTTER A WORD 
 TO ME, AND AFTER I AM FINISHED, IF YOU 
 ARE NOT ABSOLUTELY SATISFIED, DE- 
 LIGHTED AND AMAZED AT MY WONDERFUL 
 POWER, AND IF I DO NOT FAITHFULLY FUL- 
 FIL EVERY WORD AND CLAIM SWORN TO 
 ABOVE, THEN YOU PAY ME NOT ONE 
 PENNY. AND I DO HEREWITH SIGN MY 
 NAME UNDER SOLEMN OATH. 
 
 (Signed) PROF. EDGAR DOBSON. 
 Gives His Full and Complete 
 $5 READING FOR $1 
 
204 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 TO ALI^NO HIGHER--TO ALL. 
 
 DON'T MISTAKE NAME AND NUMBER. 
 
 LOCATED IN HIS OWN HOME, 
 
 76— WEST 47th STREET— 76 
 
 (Only 2 doors from 6th Av.) 
 
 Hours, 10 A. M. to 5 P. M., daily and Sunday. 
 
 The next day I got "Professor" Dobson's 
 house. 
 
 "Do you wish to have your fortune told?" 
 asked a man standing at the door. 
 
 "Yes," I said. 
 
 "But it is a little too late to-day," he said. 
 "Can you come again to-morrow, between one 
 and two o'clock in the afternoon?" 
 
 "Yes, I can do that," I said ; "but can he really 
 tell what he claims in his yesterday's advertise- 
 ment? I am very particular about it." 
 
 "If he does not give full satisfaction," he said, 
 "you do not have to pay a cent," with a gesture 
 of the arm and emphasizing the word "cent." 
 
 "All right," I said; "I will be here to-morrow 
 at the time appointed," and left him. 
 
 The next day, at half-past one, I rang the 
 door-bell; the same man opened the door, and, 
 leading me to the parlor, gave me a chair. 
 
 "Now, take this card," said the man, "and 
 this magazine to put the card on. Here is also 
 a pencil. Write all your questions upon the card, 
 sign your name at the bottom, then fold the card 
 and put it in the palm of your left hand. See 
 that you do not drop it nor give it to anybody." 
 
 Now, it was plain enough that they would 
 get the copy of my questions, and name. Never- 
 theless, I made no objection to it. 
 
"Business is Business" 205 
 
 I wrote the following four questions: 
 
 1. Where am I born? Tell me the name of 
 the city, preferably to the country. 
 
 2. What is my trade? Do you advise me to 
 stick to it or change it? 
 
 3. Have I an enemy or enemies? If so, man 
 or woman? What is the cause of enmity, and 
 how can we come to an understanding with each 
 other ? 
 
 4. Is there any girl in this city that loves 
 me? 
 
 I signed my name to it, then, folding the card, 
 held it in my left hand, just as directed. The 
 man came and led me to the "Professor's" room. 
 Here I was given a chair right opposite to the 
 "Professor's," and very close to it. He took my 
 left hand in his right hand. 
 
 "You have an enemy," he began, "but it is only 
 on account of some misunderstanding; it will 
 soon end amicably, and be all right." 
 
 "Will you tell me if my enemy is a man or 
 woman, and the exact cause of it? What do 
 you mean by 'some misunderstanding'?" 
 
 "To tell the truth, I cannot tell that part. I 
 can see, as if through a thick fog. Here is a 
 piece of paper; write it down. I will not look 
 at it. I will go to the other end of the room 
 while you are writing. If you do that, then the 
 fog melts, as it were, and I can see much clearer. 
 I have tried it many a time." 
 
 He already had a copy of my questions hold- 
 ing in his hand, and now was trying to get that 
 of the answer, and give it back, to nie as his 
 own. 
 
2o6 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 "All right," I said, took the paper and pencil, 
 and wrote in Martian, "I have no enemy." 
 
 "Did you write it?" 
 
 "Yes, I did." 
 
 "I seem not to be able to make it out, but 
 there is a blonde girl with blue eyes who loves 
 you; she is twenty-two years old; you will hear 
 about it within only two weeks. Is your name 
 Bacon?" 
 
 "No, Baron." 
 
 "Oh, yes, I see; Baron." 
 
 "Now, let us go over the questions once more, 
 if you do not object. The first and the second 
 questions remained unanswered. You made no 
 mention of them at all." 
 
 "Well, I cannot tell you what your trade is, but 
 have you got money?" 
 
 "What has money to do with the question?" 
 
 "You just tell me if you have any amount of 
 money." 
 
 "Yes, I have a little." 
 
 "I advise you to invest your money without 
 delay ; you will make a fortune." 
 
 "Now, if you look over my questions, you will 
 observe that they refer to some past or present 
 incidents of my life, but never to those to come. 
 If I shall be successful in the future, and you 
 tell me of it, such knowledge might render me 
 careless; if unsuccesful, drive me into despair. 
 I am never interested to know of my future, 
 but like to have the experiences of the past, to 
 avoid the repetition of such acts as have proved 
 disastrous to self or others. Of the four ques- 
 tions, to the first two you gave no answer; that 
 
"Business Is Business" 207 
 
 of the third is wrong, because I have been in 
 New York for only five weeks; I can have no 
 enemy, and even the thought of it is simply ridi- 
 culous. Nor that of the fourth one can be true, 
 because I have spoken to no girl as yet. I have 
 a much more important thing to do at the pres- 
 ent than bother about the girls." 
 
 "Well, if you are not satisfied, you do not have 
 to pay anything." 
 
 Now, the above advertisement costs about one 
 hundred dollars. Add to this fifty dollars as the 
 weekly expenses of the "Professor," his two at- 
 tendants, and rent (a very conservative esti- 
 mate), which equals one hundred and fifty dol- 
 lars per week. This shows that during each 
 week no less than one hundred and fifty women 
 (about ninety-five per cent, are women) go to 
 this one alone, and part with their dollar in a 
 few minutes, knowing no more of their life or 
 destiny than they knew before. In this city 
 alone, no less than five hundred thousand dollars 
 are being swallowed by these fortune-tellers. 
 
 I have but one advice to give to those who are 
 desirous to have their fortunes told. Let your 
 questions refer to the past. You will save your 
 money and send these "Professors" to some pro- 
 ductive activity. One's future almost always de- 
 pends (leaving out occasional calamities pro- 
 duced by natural causes) upon how he makes 
 use of the present; the former follows the lat- 
 ter as invariably as an effect its cause. One 
 knowing his past and present ought to be able 
 to foretell his future far better than anybody 
 else in the world. 
 
2o8 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 The following Wednesday I went to the 
 bureau quite ready and anxious to do something. 
 It was about six weeks I had been wandering 
 about. 
 
 "Take a seat, please," said the man; "we ex- 
 pect him here every minute." 
 
 I waited about half an hour. "We have just 
 got a telephone message from the man," he 
 said, "telling us that his old watchman is going 
 to stay for another month ; but never mind, let 
 that go. We have another opening for next 
 Monday, wages sixty dollars a month. You 
 come here at three o'clock in the afternoon. 
 This man is a far better man to work for; he 
 is a gentleman. We have known him for the 
 last ten years." 
 
 The next Monday I went there again at three 
 exactly; in fact, I had always been punctual. 
 
 "We regret greatly to have disappointed you 
 so often," said the man. "You can hardly 
 imagine how anxious we are to see you placed 
 upon duty; but not everything depends on our 
 choice. We must please the employers. The 
 man will be here day after to-morrow; that is, 
 next Wednesday. Now, you live in New York, 
 at Thirtieth Street, don't you?" 
 
 "Yes." 
 
 "Well, that's a good distance from here. I 
 would advise you to wait until you hear from 
 us. This will save you the trouble of coming 
 here, and when you get our letter, come here 
 without delay, being assured that everything is 
 arranged for you satisfactorily." 
 
 I waited for a whole week, but did not hear 
 
"Business Is Business" 209 
 
 from them. Then I wrote a letter stating that 
 I could wait no longer. They should either ob- 
 tain a position within a few days or return the 
 money. I received the answer on the next 
 Thursday telling me that everything was ar- 
 ranged; the position would be ready the next 
 Monday, sure ; and that I was expected to appear 
 at the bureau at nine o'clock in the morning. It 
 was marked on the envelope under the address, 
 "REMOVAL," with big letters. 
 
 Monday, at nine o'clock in the morning, I went 
 to the bureau to hear the same old story that 
 the position was not quite ready. 
 
 "I do not want your position any more," I 
 said to the man. "Refund my money." 
 
 "Oh, no; we cannot do that," he said. "We 
 have advertised for you several times. I can 
 show you the advertisements. You know how 
 expensive they are. We have spent for you 
 three dollars and fifty cents so far. You cannot 
 expect us to lose money. We are here to make 
 a living, and think of the rent that we pay for 
 this place." 
 
 I said nothing, but went right out of there to 
 the street, and asked a policeman the where- 
 abouts of the nearest municipal court. He gave 
 me the required information. When I got to 
 the court I gave the receipt to the clerk, direct- 
 ing his attention to the date of it. "These peo- 
 ple," I said, "will neither obtain a position for 
 me nor return the fee which I paid in advance." 
 
 "Go and tell them," he said, "the clerk says 
 you must refund the money, aad you will get 
 it." 
 
2IO The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 I returned to the bureau. "I went to the 
 court," I said, "and the clerk told me to tell you 
 you should return " 
 
 "Certainly, certainly," he said. "Did you go 
 to the court? Well! well! Why didn't you tell 
 me that you wanted your money?" 
 
 "I said so to the other man," I said. 
 
 "Oh, apparently he was busy," he said, "and 
 did not know who you were, or what you said. 
 Come right in and take a chair. We are very 
 sorry to have disappointed you. Is that the re- 
 ceipt? I see it is exactly four weeks to-day 
 since you paid us this money. I hate to send 
 you away empty-handed, after having kept you 
 waiting so long. There is an opening for next 
 Thursday. I will give you five dollars now, and 
 keep the balance. You come here next Thurs- 
 day. I am sure the position will be ready. Pay 
 me back that five dollars when you resume work. 
 Now, what do you say? This is an honest 
 proposition, and there is only three days." 
 
 "All right ; I will try once more," I said. "You 
 can keep the balance." I came back to New 
 York. 
 
 The next Thursday I returned. "Here I am 
 again," I said. "I hope you have the position 
 ready to-day." 
 
 "One can hardly tell what is going to hap- 
 pen to-morrow. Some unexpected event upsets, 
 now and then, our plan, and we are compelled 
 to disappoint our patrons. It is postponed to 
 next Thursday. I hope you dp not mind wait- 
 ing a few more days." 
 
"Business is Business" 211 
 
 "Do not say a word more. Give me the five 
 dollars. Here is the receipt." 
 
 Here is a man with a conscience hopelessly 
 seared, devoid of the sense of right and wrong, 
 destitute of feeling of shame, who has but one 
 object in view, to gain money, and will leave no 
 'crime uncommitted to attain this one end, but 
 for the baton of the policeman. 
 
 Both of my eyes began to ache, due probably 
 to overstrain. Knowing no doctor or eye 
 specialist whom I could consult, I went to the 
 Ophthalmic Hospital, at the corner of Third 
 Avenue and Twenty-third Street. The doctor 
 told me to use a pair of eyeglasses while read- 
 ing. She filled out a blank, and enclosing it in 
 an addressed envelope but without sealing it, 
 gave it me in order to buy a pair from the opti- 
 cian. 
 
 I took the prescription out of the envelope to 
 look at it. I noticed a promise made by three 
 opticians, all having their stores located in 
 Twenty-third Street, to supply those coming 
 from the hospital with eyeglasses at a fifty per 
 cent, reduced price. At this time everybody was 
 under suspicion. I had said, "In my haste all 
 men are liars." I wanted to know if these opti- 
 cians would really allow the promised discount, 
 or if it was only one of the lies with which the 
 country was overflowing. So, making a copy of 
 the prescription, I took it to an optician and 
 asked him how much he would charge to execute 
 the same. Glasses with gold-filled frame were 
 being advertised in the papers for three dollars 
 
212 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 a pair, but, considering it to be a temporary aind 
 special price, I wanted to know the regular price 
 of it. Here are his prices: Nickel-framed, three 
 dollars; gold-filled, four dollars and fifty cents; 
 solid gold, seven dollars. Then I took the pre- 
 scription given to me at the hospital to B. M. 
 Levoy, 24 East Twenty-third Street, to whom it 
 was addressed. 
 
 A yeung man met me in the store, who took 
 the prescription out of the envelope, read it, took 
 the measure, etc. "Now, a pair of aluminum- 
 framed glasses costs four dollars," he said; 
 "gold-filled, five dollars and fifty cents ; and solid 
 gold, eight dollars and fifty cents. Which kind 
 would you have?" 
 
 "Aluminum-framed will do," I said. "The 
 glass is the important part, not the frame." 
 
 "But the aluminum does not last very long," 
 he said. "It soon breaks, and is hard to solder. 
 "In the end, it costs you more. I would advise 
 you to buy a pair of gold-filled framed glasses ; I 
 will make it five dollars for you. One dollar 
 down, and the balance any time to-morrow morn- 
 ing after ten o'clock ; the glasses will be ready by 
 that time." 
 
 I paid the dollar and got a receipt for it. The 
 next day, just before paying the balance, I asked 
 him, "Is the regular price of this pair of glasses 
 ten dollars?" 
 
 "Why, what do you mean?" he said. 
 
 "According to your promise, you are supposed 
 to allow a discount of fifty per cent, upon the 
 regular price." 
 
"Business is Business" 213 
 
 "Oh, we have a special price for hospital peo- 
 ple," he said. 
 
 This answer immediately followed my ques- 
 tion, showing that it was a ready one, instructed 
 to be given, probably, to every employee of the 
 store, so as to convey the same answer to all 
 those who were bold enough to remind them of 
 their promise. 
 
 Upon another occasion I had taken a woman 
 not knowing English to the hospital. A 
 prescription was given to her, and she paid, if 
 I remember well, four dollars for a nickel- 
 framed pair of eyeglasses. 
 
 I do not know if there is some agreement or 
 contract between the hospital and these opti- 
 cians, or simply the latter, moved by a spirit of 
 benevolence, are charging fifty cents more than 
 the regular price to "hospital people." 
 
 Next I was reminded" by toothache of the 
 necessity of paying a visit to a dentist. 
 
 "I had that gold crown put on some time 
 ago by the New York Painless Dental Company." 
 I said to Dr. Rankin. "I have a written 
 guarantee for ten years, but they are no longer 
 there, and a new building stands in place of the 
 old one. It has been aching for these two days ; 
 see what is to be done." 
 
 "If you want it properly fixed I will have to 
 pull it out and put an artificial tooth in place of it." 
 
 "How much will that be?" 
 
 "That will cost you five dollars." 
 
 "How long will that last?" 
 
 "A life-time, but I shall give you a written 
 guarantee for ten years. The New York Pain- 
 
214 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 less Dental Company hires young men who are 
 just graduated. They do not know the business, 
 have no experience; they simply spoil the 
 tooth. I do my own work and have a well 
 established business here." 
 
 "All right, go on with your operation." 
 
 While extracting the tooth it broke. It took 
 fully five minutes before he got the fifth piece 
 out of my jaw; next he took the impression, 
 and then made the bill. 
 
 "That will cost you ten dollars," he said, "five 
 down and the balance you can pay when the 
 work is finished." 
 
 "Why, you told me before, when asked, that 
 it would cost me only five dollars. What is the 
 other five for?" I asked. 
 
 "I said five dollars apiece." 
 
 "Apiece" is a word seldem used in common 
 parlance. Apparently it was intended to convey 
 a magic meaning for a man like me speaking 
 with a foreign accent. 
 
 "How many teeth are you going to put in?" 
 
 "One, but I cannot drop it loose in your jaw, 
 I shall have to fix it, fasten it to the next one, 
 and this costs you another five dollars." 
 
 "Now I see everything clear enough. When 
 I came here you took me for a retail dealer 
 in artificial teeth and were going to charge five 
 dollars apiece at wholesale price; but after you 
 extracted the tooth you saw your mistake and 
 that the case was quite different from what you 
 had supposed it to be at first, so you doubled the 
 price. Poor, fallible mortals as we are, such a 
 small blunder is to be excused in a dentist!" 
 
"Business is Business" 215 
 
 ' The forty-two closing days of the nineteenth 
 century which I spent in New York had passed 
 without my doing anything. The first two 
 months of the twentieth century also passed in 
 the same way, but about the middle of March I 
 
 could be seen quite busy in hotel M helping 
 
 one head-waitress and four waitresses. Wages, 
 twenty dollars a month and board. This is the 
 very same hotel where I had learned Tennyson's 
 couplet in the twisted form. I was told that 
 no one would stay there more than a month on 
 account of the work being so hard. I was there, 
 however, for about five months. 
 
 One day while cleaning the tables I noticed 
 a dime upon one of them where a French nurse 
 used to take her meals. I knew nothing about 
 "Tips" as yet. "This dime," I said to the head- 
 waitress, "was left on the table at which the 
 French nurse sits ; she must have put it on there 
 by some mistake." 
 
 "All right," she said, "I will speak to her 
 about it," took the dime and put it on the shelf. 
 After a while I noticed one of the girls dusting 
 the shelves. She saw the money, and taking it 
 in her hand examined it closely; it was a gen- 
 uine dime, then she looked all round to see if 
 anyone was watching her. I was the only one 
 who knew what was going on, but pretended not 
 to see her. She appropriated it. 
 
 A new nurse came with four children. One 
 day the oldest among them, a boy of about ten 
 years old, having a dollar in his hand, called me 
 to his side and handed it to me. "What is this 
 for?" I asked him. 
 
2i6 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 "Mamma told me to give it to you," he said. 
 
 I knew a man who had been a waiter for 
 many years. I told him about the dollar asking 
 him, at the same time, the reason why it was 
 given to me. 
 
 "We call that 'Tip,' " he said, "I thought you 
 knew about it. See that those children are well 
 treated; let their meals be served in time; ask 
 them, now and then, if they will have anything 
 else, etc. If you do all this you will get a 
 dollar every week." 
 
 I could not follow his advice, because not 
 being a waiter I was 'not supposed to wait upon 
 them; my work commenced after the meals 
 were over. Then too, I thought that a waiter's 
 time or services were to be divided equally be- 
 tween the patrons. Should more time be given 
 to the one, the others would be deprived of the 
 services to which they were entitled. 
 
 Another day I was on the elevator with two 
 waiters. One of them was serving a plate of 
 ice cream. I saw the waiter spit on the ice 
 cream. I was shocked at it; I could hardly 
 believe my eyes. I had seen so many Board of 
 Health signs, "Spitting on the floor is a mis- 
 demeanor." What about spitting on the ice 
 cream, on the meals? 
 
 "What are you trying to do?" I asked, after 
 the lapse of a few seconds. 
 
 He said nothing, but seeing my surprise at 
 what he had done, spat twice more to show 
 that he was bolder still and capable of doing 
 more of it. 
 
 At this time the other waiter turned round, 
 
"Business is Business" 217 
 
 looked first on the ice cream and then at the 
 waiter. "That serves him all right," he said. 
 
 "Why, what's wrong with the man?" I de- 
 manded. 
 
 "He is so stingy," said the latter, "that he will 
 not give more than ten cents for each meal." 
 
 "How much do you expect?" I repeated. 
 
 "At least twenty-five cents ; the same as the 
 rest," he said. "Some of them give as much as 
 fifty cents. He is too stingy, that is what is the 
 matter with him." 
 
 The man gives thirty cents a day to the waiter, 
 who is not satisfied and spits upon his meals. 
 He expects from seventy-five cents to one dollar 
 and fifty cents per day, a sum for which many a 
 man and woman work all day, and very hard 
 too; and this happens in, if not a first-class, at 
 least, a second-class hotel. It occupies a whole 
 block, has one thousand rooms, is twelve stories 
 high, and located opposite Central Park. The 
 building, furnishings and general equipment are 
 valued at two million five hundred thousand 
 dollars. Heaven knows what impurities are 
 served in cheaper hotels and restaurants. 
 
 A second case was brought to my notice, but 
 not in the same hotel. A pitcher of water had 
 kidney excreta added to it, and a third one, 
 rice pudding, was medicated so as to cause 
 diarrhoea. I have heard of many others but this 
 work contains none but what I have seen. 
 
 Spitting on a meal is as cowardly as it is 
 common among the waiters. It is their easy and 
 ready way of avenging the deprivation of what 
 they consider their rightful dues. The Board of 
 
21 8 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 Health little suspects that spitting on the meal 
 is a misdemeanor of more frequent occurrence 
 than on the floor, but it is helpless; a sign for 
 its prohibition would be an ineffective as ridi- 
 culous. 
 
 Who is to blame for this world-wide nuis- 
 ance? The waiters? No. "Tips" could never 
 have been originated by the waiters themselves. 
 A wealthy, vain, coxcomb, fond of flattery, 
 hankering after the breath of popular favor, 
 craving approbation and applause, places a quar- 
 ter in the hand of some mercenary cad. Words 
 like "Mister," "Sir," "Generous," the "Gentle- 
 man," etc., are showered upon him as a tribute 
 of adulation. The waiter can never do enough 
 for him; in his presence the others are over- 
 looked, while he is the center of attraction. 
 The rest, if desirous to have a like service ren- 
 dered to them, are to follow his example. They 
 do follow, in fact, they are compelled to follow 
 his example. But it is evident that when all 
 tip a waiter they all get an equal service as if 
 tips were unknown. The case, however, never 
 comes to this state; a competition is being car- 
 ried on among the patrons of hotels or restau- 
 rants. The best tipper gets the best service 
 rendered to him. This is why in some hotels 
 waiters make from one hundred to two hun- 
 dred dollars per month in tips alone. 
 
 To the question, "How much is a waiter to 
 be given?" the proper answer will be, as the 
 case stands at the present, "As much as he 
 expects." And, "How much does he expect?" 
 "At the same rate that a vain fop gives or has 
 
"Business is Business" 219' 
 
 given him some time ago." Those who fall 
 short of the mark are maltreated and their meals 
 adulterated. The confession of the average 
 waiter would shock any sensible man. 
 
 It has been urged that the waiter is underpaid, 
 and the tip is meant to make up the deficiency of 
 his wages. But the fact is that people do not 
 know, nor do they care to know, of the insuffi- 
 ciency of a waiter's wages. 
 
 Four weeks after I had been in the hotel 
 
 M , the gentlemen's cafe was divided into 
 
 two parts and the smaller one assigned for the 
 use of the nurses as a dining-room. The wait- 
 resses were laid off and waiters hired, myself 
 being one of them. I waited for a whole month 
 on the nurse having the care of the four chil- 
 dren who had given me a dollar, my first tip, 
 but I got not a cent more from them although I 
 never kept them waiting and I am positive they 
 received from me a far better service than from 
 the waitress. But why did his "Mamma" not 
 send me any more tips? I did not expect, nor 
 was I sorry for not getting them. Was it be- 
 cause my wages were raised? Not at all. She 
 had not the least idea what my wages were, 
 but she well knew how waiters abused the man 
 or woman who would not tip them. It was 
 intended to obtain my good-will towards her 
 children and their nurse, to treat them well, 
 show due courtesy to them, etc. But my ques- 
 tion, "What is this for?" being a sure indication 
 that I expected no tips, she stopped it. That 
 this is the only reason why people tip the waiter, 
 and not the inadequacy of his wages, is still more 
 
220 Thie Inscrutable Woman 
 
 evident from the fact that no one will ever 
 think of tipping the omnibus and the dish 
 washer who work harder and get smaller wages 
 than the waiter; nor the cook, who almost roasts 
 himself, especially in summer in the hot kitchen 
 over the stove. 
 
 If all the help in hotels and restaurants are 
 well paid why should the waiters be excepted? 
 If the price of the meals be raised but ten per 
 cent, the increased profit thus made would be 
 amply sufficient to double the wages of every 
 waiter. While now as the case stands, some 
 give to the waiter as high as thirty to forty per 
 cent. They are the "Generous" class, tested and 
 pronounced such by the waiter who is as good 
 a judge of men as a glazier is of diamonds. 
 Others give about twenty per cent., who are 
 fairly well served when the waiter is in a good 
 humor. But those who give only ten per cent, 
 or less get their meals adulterated or poisoned. 
 They belong to the "Stingy" class. 
 
 But there is another and more important side 
 of the question. My plea is for the waiter. 
 Waiters, waitresses, porters, etc., the part of 
 whose wages is paid in tips are, in the majority 
 of cases, on duty every day in the week, Sun- 
 day included. This class of people have nothing 
 else to think of all day long but tips. Now, 
 take a waiter; when he gets up in the morning 
 the first thing, perhaps his prayer, is to make a 
 guess as to the amount he expects or wishes to 
 make in tips that day. He goes to work; every 
 man or woman that steps into the dining-room 
 is scrutinized from head to feet. If it be an old 
 
"Business is Business" 221 
 
 customer belonging to the "Generous" class, 
 adulation and good service for him; if to the 
 "Stingy" class, abuse, etc. Now what becomes 
 of such a man? The sight of a waiter invari- 
 ably reminds me of the animals of the zoological 
 garden who expect to get peanuts from passers- 
 by. The latter are superior to the former in that 
 they do not resent, "cuss" or swear at those 
 whp give them nothing. 
 
 Let a chance be given these tip-takers to think 
 of something else than this perpetual tip. Were 
 waiters to marry waitresses for a number of gen- 
 erations in succession, the begetting of such chil- 
 dren as to be capable of pronouncing the word 
 "Tip" on the day of their birth may not be an 
 impossibility. Another parallel case, by the way, 
 the successive coupling of actors and actresses 
 for generations, might give birth to a race of 
 maniacs or lunatics ; the difference between the 
 two is that the former pretends to be other than 
 himself consciously, while the latter, uncon- 
 sciously. 
 
 I know of nothing more demoralizing than 
 the giving or, more especially, the taking of tips. 
 All those whose services are partly paid in tips 
 are, or, knowing how pliant human nature is, 
 soon become flatterers, parasites, hypocrites, 
 mercenary in the extreme ; they lose self-re- 
 liance and self-respect. These qualities are to be 
 listed either among the virtues as commendable 
 for all, or among the vices, and the practice of 
 them discouraged. A weekly ethical address in 
 Cooper Union, a discourse in a lyceum, and a 
 lecture in a public school building delivered to 
 
222 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 a handful of men are entirely ineffectual when 
 hundreds of thousands are being encouraged in 
 immorality in their every-day life. In order to 
 eliminate a vice it should be torn up by the 
 roots. 
 
 Tips should be prohibited by legislation riot 
 only in tjhis country but all over the world. 
 That this is, from mere hygienic considerations, 
 of far more importance than the prohibition of 
 spitting on the floor has already been shown be- 
 fore. An end will thus be put to the poisoning 
 of the meals, to the practice of servile adulation 
 to some and abusive treatment to others. 
 Waiters will gain in self-respect, an invaluable 
 human quality ; a uniform service be rendered to 
 all. Those affected by the law will have some- 
 thing else to meditate than the never-ending tip, 
 or, in analogy to the animals in a zOo, peanuts. 
 This will deprive the vain, the wealthy fool, 
 eager to rule and command, and who will take 
 a great deal of trouble to dazzle some insignifi- 
 cant cad whose personality they heartily despise, 
 of the ill-accorded flattery, praise, and applause. 
 A salutary lesson to the rich that respect does 
 not belong to wealth; it rightly belongs to the 
 wise, the man who knows himself and the uni- 
 versal order of things or God's will as expressed 
 in this order; who lives a perfect life, discharg- 
 ing his duties conscientiously. Craving for 
 praise, however, is a disease; the perfect man, 
 the highly developed human being of the future, 
 will be cured of it. 
 
 The time shall come when praise will not be 
 given even to the man who lives a perfect life. 
 
"Business is Business" 223 
 
 Do we praise a body because it falls towards 
 the center of the earth if unsupported? When 
 the laws of nature are well understood and all 
 human desire brought under the censorship of 
 reason, living a perfect life will be as mechanical 
 and uniform as the falling of an unsupported 
 body is. At this stage respect will be given to 
 the man who is capable of unraveling the 
 secrets of nature. 
 
 Recurring to the main problem, prohibition of 
 tips is far from being an attempt to compel 
 people into the observance of some foreign 
 standard or precept, much less a capricious im- 
 position upon them. It is simply closing the 
 channels of widespread vices — flattery, hypoc- 
 risy, parasitism, etc., which has arrested the, 
 development of the virtues of self-respect, self- 
 esteem, self-reliance and impartiality. Its salu- 
 tary effect will be felt in every department of 
 life. 
 
 I had been an omnibus for the first four 
 months, but in the fifth I became a waiter, 
 though only in the nurses' hall. Another step 
 would have joined me with the regular waiters 
 making from sixty dollars to one hundred dol- 
 lars a month in tips alone. But I did not like to 
 be a waiter; I could neither flatter those who 
 would tip me nor maltreat those who would not. 
 I made up my mind to resign. I gave a week's 
 notice to the head-waiter who told me that he 
 would send a young man to help me if my 
 work was too heavy. But I spoke to him of my 
 intention to change the kind of work as I did 
 not like to be a waiter. 
 
224 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 At the end of the week I left the hotel and 
 advertised for a position as a watchmaker. 
 During my first attempts to obtain a position, 
 some of the jewelers, upon hearing of my 
 nationality, had asked me if there were, in 
 reality, any watches in our country. A watch- 
 maker coming from a country where there are 
 no watches is contradictory to common sense. 
 I thought it necessary to conceal my nationality 
 and thus part company with George Washing- 
 ton, and so I did until I got two letters of testi- 
 monials. 
 
 Within a week I obtained a position in a 
 very small jewelry store, wages only six dollars 
 a week for three months. I could refer now to a 
 jeweler in the city. Next I worked for a German 
 jeweler at a salary of nine dollars per week; 
 then for a company making experiments upon 
 wireless telegraphy, wages ten dollars a week, 
 working only five hours daily and three hours 
 on Saturdays until the induction coil was 
 burned. Next I worked for John Wanamaker 
 at a salary of twelve dollars per week. My 
 fifth position was in Newark, New Jersey, 
 
 wages fifteen dollars, and the sixth in P , 
 
 wages eighteen dollars per week. This brings 
 us to the beginning of the story. 
 
'Better Part of Truth" 225 
 
 CHAPTER VII. 
 
 "the better part of truth." 
 
 "Though love repine and reason chafe. 
 There came a voice without reply, 
 'It is man's perdition to be safe, 
 When for the truth he ought to die.' " 
 
 Mention has already been made of my three 
 long surnames which I had dropped, having pre- 
 ferred to be called by my school name, as the 
 easiest to pronounce. 
 
 Myself, as well as my brothers and sisters, 
 were all recorded under the surname of Gold- 
 smithson at the Government register, but we 
 preferred, with our relatives and neighbors, 
 Clergymanson. During my stay in Grays, Eng- 
 land, every one there was called by his second 
 name, while I was called by my first name, my 
 last name having been considered as unpro- 
 nounceable. In this country I made no mention 
 of those long surnames, except when I applied 
 for my first naturalization paper, and that only 
 to be dropped entirely. My sister, when she 
 goes to Cairo, Egypt, and discovers that Eng- 
 lishmen could not pronounce her last name, ex- 
 amines her passport, and, finding it registered 
 Goldsmithson, adopts this name, which, though 
 long and hard to pronounce, is not as hard as 
 the first one. 
 
 The reader, I presume, remembers the postal 
 card which I received from my sister when I 
 
226 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 was in N , working for Mr. Tapken. It 
 
 was addressed as follows : 
 
 "Mr. E. D. Baron, 3 North Center Street, 
 
 P , U. S. A. Care of W. H. Mortimer." 
 
 On the other side, "Dear Brother, . . ." 
 "(Signed) Marie Goldsmithson." 
 
 Mr. Mortimer read the postal card, carefully 
 examining the two sides of it, then took it to the 
 Inscrutable Woman, directing her attention to 
 the fact that my sister and I had different sur- 
 names. This bit of information was enough for 
 her; probably she lost her rest and sleep, her 
 intuition got wild. This being equivalent to ap- 
 plying a match to the fuse of a bomb, an ex- 
 plosion was inevitable. It did explode, and the 
 damage incurred is beyond calculation. 
 
 I did not commit suicide nor marry her daugh- 
 ter the heiress. Was this possible in a country 
 where, were a modern Nebuchadnezzar to erect 
 a golden image, not even as many as three men 
 could be found refusing to kneel before it in 
 worship? She thought to have found a clue 
 that might lead to the discovery of the true rea- 
 son to account for such an impossibility. 
 
 She knew I had been in England, as I had 
 told W. D. Anthony, her first and principle mat- 
 rimonial agent in P . So she sent Dr. David 
 
 Guillon, the Episcopalian minister, an English- 
 man, to my boarding house to learn where I 
 had been in England. His question and my an- 
 swer to it have already been mentioned. This 
 was the reason why Percy, the piano agent, ad- 
 vised me again and again to take my naturaliza- 
 tion papers just before leaving N . So did 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 227 
 
 Dr. Guillon and all the employees of Mr. Tap- 
 ken, but having just taken my first paper, I had 
 to wait "two years before I would be given the 
 second one. 
 
 Dr. Guillon had told me of his intention to 
 pay a visit to his relatives in England. He may 
 have gone to Grays personally, or sent someone 
 else to inquire about me. But who can tell how 
 jubilant the Inscrutable Woman became when 
 the news of my cpnviction reached her, because 
 the discovery was due not to my truthfulness 
 — no, but to her intuition, woman's intuition. 
 May heaven save us all from woman's intuition. 
 
 How much reliance may safely be given to a 
 woman's intuitive cognition? As much as to the 
 weather prognostications of the ancient astro- 
 loger for each day of a century or more to come. 
 It is like the throwing of dice. One guess out 
 of six comes true. She keeps the record of the 
 one and discards the rest, assigning, in the ma- 
 jority of cases, an irrelevant circumstance to ac- 
 count for each failure. After a number of years 
 she comes to have a long list of these success- 
 ful guesses, which could easily be accounted for 
 by the law of probability or chance, had a faith- 
 ful record been kept of the unsuccessful ones 
 also. She regards this as the invariable result of 
 her intuitive perception. Of this she is very 
 proud, and believing herself to be the possessor 
 of some innate prophetic faculty, despises dis- 
 cursive reasoning as too bungling and awkward 
 a process, and considers reasoners as dunces or 
 dullards. 
 
 Thus she discovered at last the true reason, 
 
22 8 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 having taken three years and a half, as to why 
 I neither married her daughtor nor committed 
 suicide, and all the credit was due to her intui- 
 tion. Is she going to let me know of this al- 
 most miraculous discovery, indicatory of her 
 sagaciousness and the great penetrativeness of 
 her mind? Certainly, but not directly, because 
 she does "not even know my whereabouts"; she 
 
 only "heard that I had left P , but did not 
 
 know where I went"; she has "not been doing 
 anything to me"; I have been "imagining," and 
 her "lies are the better parts of truths." The 
 talk of detectives, arrests, conviptions, prison- 
 ers, in the store and the boarding house, fol- 
 lowed by the question, "Have you ever been in 
 jail?" by Chas. Wolpert, her chief agent in 
 N , has this end in view. 
 
 I understood everything, but before I gave 
 him an answer, "I mean," he said, "to see a 
 friend or attend to some business." 
 
 "Many a time," I said. "In England," I went 
 on, "the lawyers wear wigs ; I wonder if they do 
 it in this country also?" 
 
 "Why, how do you know? Have you ever 
 been in a court in England?" 
 
 "Yes, I have." 
 
 "As a witness, I suppose." 
 
 "No, I was implicated in a case myself." 
 
 "Did you have a lawyer?" 
 
 "No; only an interpreter." At this our con- 
 versation was interrupted. 
 
 "I was just thinking of that rich woman," 
 said Wolpert in the afternoon; "that mean. 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 229 
 
 heartless, inhuman woman who had given me 
 so much trouble; in fact, beyond description; 
 and if a man should murder her and be arrested 
 and tried, I would pronounce him not guilty 
 were I one of the jurors. Don't you think this 
 would be right?" 
 
 This question, which was put to me about four 
 months previously, and my answer to it, have al- 
 ready been mentioned in their proper place in 
 the regular order of the events. He was only 
 trying to remind me of the Inscrutable Woman, 
 and I thought it not worth while to attach any 
 importance to the question, much less to give 
 an appropriate answer to it. "I am afraid," I 
 said to him, "my thought or opinion will not be 
 received with cordiality in your mind. I prefer 
 to let you alone in order to proceed with your 
 criminal case as best you can." 
 
 In the meanwhile I noticed some of the em- 
 ployees of Mr. Tapken carrying specimens of 
 my handwriting in their pockets. They took 
 them out now and then, showed them to me, and 
 folding them carefullj^, put them back in their 
 pockets again. 
 
 '*I wonder," I said one day, "what you intend 
 to do with my handwriting?" 
 
 "Why," said Dawson, "we know you are the 
 leader of a gang of blackmailers. We are going 
 to put your handwriting in the hands of the 
 policemen and detectives, and trace you out. 
 The proper place for you to work is on the 
 treadmill, and not a jewelry store." 
 
 "No," said Wolpert, who was standing be- 
 side me; "that is where the horses work," 
 
230 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 "I wonder," said Dawson, "how you can man- 
 age to keep out of jail. Now, tell me the truth, 
 how much short of bail were you?" 
 
 "Will you come to my room?" said Wolpert, 
 right after the dinner. 
 
 "Yes, I will," I said, and went up together 
 to his room. 
 
 "Christmas is so near," he said, giving me a 
 chair, "and I have to wait on women. Oh, how 
 I hate women ! You can hardly imagine the ex- 
 tent of my feeling of aversion to them; how 
 mean, heartless and inhuman they are ! When a 
 woman hates a man and seeks to put him to 
 death, she will not murder by one blow, but tor- 
 ture him to death." 
 
 Think of a young man engaged to marry one 
 of these women, and making three yearly trips 
 to Lancaster, a distance of about one hundred 
 and fifty miles, to see her ! Could this have 
 been the true description of his feelings with 
 respect to all women indiscriminately? Impos- 
 sible! He was still trying to remind me of the 
 Inscrutable Woman. 
 
 I soon left him in his room and went out for 
 a little walk. At half-past one we naturally met 
 each other again in the store. 
 
 "Don't you think women are intellectiially in- 
 ferior to men?" he asked me. 
 
 "I think they are," I said, cursorily. 
 
 This question, as the reader should remember, 
 was asked before, but now the case was quite 
 different. She had incontestable evidence in 
 proof of her intellectual superiority. Did she 
 not find out that I had been convicted years ago, 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 231 
 
 and that way in England? Show her the man 
 who could have achieved such a deed requiring 
 great intellectual power. Did I still consider 
 women intellectually inferior to men? Did I 
 dare to pronounce the same verdict with respect 
 to the Inscrutable Woman? 
 
 I shall try to please her by calling her the In- 
 tellectually-higher-than-man Woman in the re- 
 maining part of this book. She will like this 
 name better. 
 
 The talk in the store as well as in the board- 
 ing house was mainly, as mentioned before, about 
 detectives, arrests, convictions, prisoners, etc., for 
 two weeks. During the third week such was the 
 talk of the whole town (population about twenty- 
 four thousand). The next show to be exhibited 
 in the only theater being "The Detectives," big 
 signs were painted and carried about in the 
 streets for a whole week. 
 
 If I should say that this show was, in all proba- 
 bility, ordered especially for the occasion, the 
 reader may be inclined to laugh at the idea as 
 too absurd to give credence to it, being unable 
 to see any possible connection between my case 
 — an insignificant, personal affair — and the show 
 of a theater which concerns the population of the 
 whole town, or at least those for whose interest 
 it is ordered and exhibited. 
 
 But let us consider some of the circumstances 
 of the case. Mr. Miller, the manager of the 
 theater, and his wife were rooming and boarding 
 in the same boarding house where I used to take 
 my meals. He was one of the Intellectually- 
 higher-than-man Woman's chief agents. With 
 
232 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 many other things, which will be too long to men- 
 tion, he was the third one who tried to induce 
 me to invest my savings where, he said, he had 
 invested his — a sum of five thousand dollars — and 
 got a dividend of fifty-five per cent, the previous 
 year. 
 
 He had no children. His weekly expenses, 
 together with that of his wife, could not have 
 been more than fifteen dollars, living, as they 
 did, in a boarding house. Being the manager of 
 the theater, and having received in dividends 
 two thousand seven hundred and fifty dollars, 
 he was still unable to support his wife, who left 
 him for a six-month tour in order to make some 
 money. It was only another scheme of hers 
 to rob me of my savings. On the other hand, 
 when it is well known, as will be seen more in 
 the next chapter, what a desperate devil of a 
 woman the Intellectually-higher-than-man Wo- 
 man was, who had spent thousands, and was go- 
 ing to spend tens of thousands of dollars to carry 
 on her capricious design, very little room for 
 doubt will be left. 
 
 At six o'clock Saturday evening I was about 
 to leave the store. "Are you going to the theater 
 to-night ?" said Dawson to me. "There is a good 
 show there, 'The Detectives.' " 
 
 He knew as well as the rest that I did not care 
 much for shows. I went about once a year. But 
 this was an opportune show, having special ref- 
 erence to an incident in my life. "The Detec- 
 tives" must have been very interesting to me, 
 and full of suggestions, capable of resuscitating in 
 my mind the memory of such events of bygone 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 233 
 
 days as may have been buried in the sea of ob- 
 livion, because I had had some dealings with 
 them, and he was aware of it. 
 
 "No, I will go to the Carnegie Theater," I said, 
 and went out. 
 
 One evening, only a few days before Christ- 
 mas, while going to the store, Mickle, a boarder, 
 met me in George Street. "Did you hear the 
 news?" he asked. 
 
 "I do not know what news you mean," I said ; 
 "but I have heard nothing of any importance." 
 
 "Arlington, the electrician, and his wife have 
 run away early this morning without paying the 
 last four weeks' board bill, amounting to forty- 
 four dollars." 
 
 "That is not a good thing to do," I said. 
 
 "No, indeed," he said; "but they cannot catch 
 him any more; he must have passed to some 
 other state by this time. But say nothing of it 
 to anyone, please." 
 
 Later Wolpert told me the same story, advis- 
 ing in the end to mention it to nobody. In the 
 evening Mrs. Hall gave me the news of the run- 
 aways and asked me to keep everything secret. 
 The next morning Miss Hall mentioned the case, 
 and asked me not to divulge the news to the 
 others. 
 
 "Do you know that I have already heard of 
 this from no less than three different persons 
 within the twenty- four hours?" I said. "And 
 you still tell me to keep secret what everyone 
 seems to know of?" 
 
 "Whom did yoa hear it from?" she asked me. 
 
 "From Midde, Wolpert, your mother, and now 
 
234 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 from you," I said ; "and they all told me to with- 
 hold the news from the others." 
 
 She laughed. "I never thought it would spread 
 within such a short time," she said, and turned 
 away. 
 
 I was quite sure that Arlington had paid his 
 board bill. Arlington pretended to run away, 
 and Miss Hall gave a false alarm. This was 
 only one of the many roguish tricks devised by 
 the Intellectually-higher-than-man Woman that 
 had been succeeding one after the other in their 
 order, as arranged by her. She was making 
 criminals of straw, and trying to have them ar- 
 rested. 
 
 "Arlington's case," I said to Wolpert after two 
 weeks, "seems to me to have been some kind of 
 a joke, as Miss Hall appears to feel all the hap- 
 pier for it." 
 
 To this he gave no answer, but the following 
 morning Miss Hall told me that Detective Dun- 
 ning had been after them, and that she expected 
 to hear the news of their arrest every minute. 
 At the end of another week, she said: "Detec- 
 tive Dunning has not been able to locate them. 
 They must have gone to some other state, in 
 which case they could not be arrested, because a 
 criminal can only be arrested in the state where 
 he commits the crime." 
 
 Here is a new law, enacted by the Intellec- 
 tually-higher-than-man Woman to suit the occa- 
 sion and serve her end. 
 
 "I have written down all that was said to me," 
 I said one day to those in the store. 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 235 
 
 "You must not do anything of that kind," they 
 said; "we have only been fooHng." 
 
 "I am very anxious to know what the world 
 thinks of this kind of fooling," I said. "I in- 
 tend to present it to them as soon as I get a 
 chance; if that way of fooling is commendable, 
 you will have many followers, and bring honor 
 to your name ; if not, it may serve you as a salu- 
 tary lesson, and prevent a good many from fol- 
 lowing your example." 
 
 I should have prefererd to continue my work 
 until the winter was over, till the beginning of 
 April. Such was the plan I had previously laid 
 down, but I felt my condition almost intolerable. 
 The room next to mine had all the time been oc- 
 cupied by a mimic; there had been an ape in 
 the library, five fools in the store, and over a 
 dozen clowns in-^he boarding house. Live every 
 minute of your life among such a crowd if you 
 can. A body has a certain degree of resisting 
 power to external impression or force, but be- 
 yond that power it yields, breaks down, and loses 
 its shape. Nor man makes an exception to 
 this rule; abusive treatment ruins and dehu- 
 manizes him. It was impossible for me to stay 
 there, nor would it have beeii for her if she 
 were in my place. I saw her for the last time 
 while taking communion, apparently a stanch 
 Christian; but does she read her Bible in order 
 to learn with many other things to do to others 
 as she would be done by? A woman who twists 
 the laws of the country to make them serve her 
 selfish ends, the more easily can she tamper with 
 the teachings of her religion. 
 
236 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 I gave two weeks' notice to Mr. Tapken, hav- 
 ing resolved to go to New York. ' 
 
 The next Friday, after dinner, Wolpert 
 
 brought some candy to the store, and gave me 
 
 a Httle of it. "Do you remember," he said, "my 
 
 revolver, which I showed to you the other day?" 
 
 _ "Yes, I do." 
 
 " "I bought that revolver for self-protection, be- 
 cause one can never tell what may happen to 
 him, whom he may encounter at almost any 
 time. There are so many crooked people round 
 here; in fact, everywhere. I saved my girl once 
 with that revolver from the attack of a negro." 
 
 I said nothing. After a silence of about two 
 minutes, he said: "Have you also a revolver? I 
 mean," he added, "just for self-protection. There 
 is nothing wrong in having a revolver. You 
 know, I have one, and almost everybody has 
 one." 
 
 I had no revolver, and an answer "No" would 
 have immediately followed to such a question un- 
 der any other circumstance. But during the last 
 month such questions were put to me as would 
 have disgusted anybody. The following are some 
 of them. 
 
 "Have you ever been in Mott Street? The 
 blackmailers, it is said, hold their meetings there. 
 Is that true? There is a death chamber also, 
 they say, in Mot)t Street, to put unransomed kid- 
 napped children to death. Have you seen it? 
 Anarchists have raised a red flag in New York. 
 Do you sympathize with them? Have you ever 
 been in Ellis Island, Blackwell's, Sing Sing? Do 
 you know where the Tombs is ? Have you ever 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 237 
 
 been in jail? Did you never marry?" I omit 
 here to mention a number of questions as entirely 
 unfit to print, and, lastly, as the reader well re- 
 members, having called me the leader of a gang 
 of blackmailers, she now wants to know if I have 
 a revolver. Taking advantage of my truthful- 
 ness, she left no question unasked. First, by 
 Anthony, then Dr. Guillon, and now Wolpert. 
 A strictly truthful man catechised by an inveter- 
 ate liar is the most pathetic scene in the world. 
 I was not going to stay with them very long, 
 yet I made an attempt to discourage him asking 
 such questions. "I prefer not to answer your 
 question," I said. 
 
 "You damned Martian!" he said. "You eat 
 my candy, but refuse to give a straightforward 
 answer to my straightforward question." 
 
 "I thought it to be a straightforward answer," 
 I said. "I wonder what makes you think that 
 one is obliged to answer your questions, and this 
 in such a way as to please you ? This is tyranny, 
 imposing your will upon the others ; besides, you 
 do not seem to be careful to ask pleasant ques- 
 tions to others, but very desirous to get such 
 answers from them. This is selfishness, indif- 
 ference to the feelings and sentiments of others. 
 Once more, if I put you a similar question, and 
 it does not suit you to give a correct answer to 
 it, you tell me a lie with no feeling of compunc- 
 tion, because you seem to have a hopelessly 
 seared conscience in regard to lying. Had I told 
 you a lie about my having a revolver or not, you 
 would have known no better than you do now. 
 In other words, it is at best immaterial to the 
 
238 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 questioner whether he get a wrong answer or 
 none to his question, not to mention cases when 
 the former is misleading and Hable to give birth 
 to grave consequences. But it is far from being 
 so with respect to the one who answers. In the 
 first instance he proves himself mendacious, but 
 in the second a truthful, reliable man, a habit no 
 one can well afford to be indifferent to. Now 
 will you tell me which one of the two alterna- 
 tives — a wrong and no answer — ^you would pre- 
 fer to have to your question, and why?" 
 
 "Well," he said, "I am not going to ask any 
 more questions of you." 
 
 "I am well satisfied," I said. "Nothing will 
 please me more than to put an end to this kind 
 of questions" 
 
 Men cannot live together amicably, unless 
 there exists a certain degree of respect towards 
 one another. la our case, none was left. Now 
 that the news of my conviction had been imparted 
 to them, nothing but constant abuse and insult 
 were in store for me. I had to leav6 them as 
 the only remedy to restore peace in the store and 
 give myself a little rest. 
 
 "What do you intend to do when you leave 
 us?" asked Wolpert. 
 
 "Probably," I said, "I will go into the photo- 
 graph business." 
 
 "Are you going to fix up a rogues' gallery and 
 put your picture in?" he said. "Now, now," he 
 added, "you will write it in your book; I know 
 what goes in there." 
 
 "Aha!" said Henry; "that's right." 
 
 "I may or not," I said; "but I do not see any 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 239 
 
 reason why I should disappoint you in that. Not 
 a few of those pictures now decorating our 
 churches would have been kept in rogues' gal- 
 leries by their contemporary population, were the 
 art of photography known to them. It is for the 
 sons to hang the picture in a church which their 
 fathers put in a rogues' gallery." 
 
 The echo of the cry, "Not this man, but Bar- 
 abbas ; now Barabbas was a robber," has not died 
 out ; it can be still heard in any church. 
 
 It may be urged that this is a case of heresy, 
 and not a crime; a second example will fully 
 meet this objection. Francis Bacon, Lord Keeper 
 of the Great Seal, Lord Chancellor, Baron Veru- 
 1am St. Albans, the celebrated English philoso- 
 pher of whom England as well as the world is 
 proud, was convicted of bribery. He confessed 
 himself guilty, was condemned to pay a fine of 
 about two hundred thousand dollars and im- 
 prisonment for an indefinite time during the 
 king's pleasure. 
 
 Bacon did nothing that was not done by his 
 contemporaries ; if he were not a philosopher, his 
 offense in all probability would never be known. 
 
 The true philosopher, simple, hair-splitting, 
 consciencious and truthful son of nature, given to 
 the world fresh and pure from the hands of the 
 Creator, undefiled and unsophisticated, lives, as 
 it were, in the Paradis«, secure from the outside 
 world's chances and mishaps, not having tasted 
 the fruit of the forbidden tree. One mis-step, 
 and he is lost. Conceal it he cannot. He be- 
 comes uneasy; the remembrance of it torments 
 him until he confesses his error and thus be- 
 
240 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 trays himself with child-like simplicity. He pays 
 the penalty, oaly to discover, to his great morti- 
 fication, that the world never absolves the one 
 who pays to the last mite, but him who refuses 
 to pay anything. 
 
 Let us see what Walt Whitman has to say 
 about criminals : "Of criminals, to me, any judge, 
 or any juror, is equally criminal, and any repu- 
 table person is also, and the president is also." 
 
 The world, however, divides the criminals into 
 two classes — those who pay the penalty of their 
 offense and the rest who do not. Only the for- 
 mer class are considered criminals. 
 
 Saturday evening I packed my tools. Every- 
 one of them shook my hand. "I expect you back 
 within two months," said one of them, "with a 
 wife and two children. Do you know how?" 
 
 "I cannot understand such things as that," I 
 said. 
 
 "Why, it is very easy," he said ; "simply marry 
 a widow with two children." 
 
 Another hoped that I was going to marry a 
 wealthy girl in Astor Library. To the last min- 
 ute the talk was hardly of anything else than 
 girl, wife, marriage. "What fools these people 
 be!" 
 
 Monday I left N and came to New York; 
 
 I rented a small room temporarily in West 
 Twenty-second Street. I immediately began to 
 look at the advertisements of photographic maga- 
 zines, with a view to buying an old-established 
 photograph studio, although I was somewhat in 
 hesitation as to the advisableness of the plan, on 
 account of the financial depression of the country. 
 
"Better Part of Truth" >^ 241 
 
 On the fifteenth of February, while coming 
 from the library, at about eight o'clock in the 
 evening, I halted for a minute or so near the 
 curb at the corner of Twenty-third Street and 
 Seventh Avenue. A young man came after me 
 and stood a . few steps aiyay from me. Where- 
 upon I walked back towards Sixth Avenue; he 
 began to follow me. I turned back and came 
 as far as the curb again. He followed, me, but 
 stood this time in front of the tobaccd'^store ^f 
 the corner. I went close to him, to see who he 
 was. He was a young man, clean-shaven, but a 
 total stranger to me. I passed him and went to 
 the penny arcade ; in the meanwhile I noticed an- 
 other one following me. After a minute or two 
 I came out of the arcade, and the second one 
 was coming towards me. I moved into Seventh 
 Avenue and stood in front of the tobacco store; 
 the second one came, and, passing me, halted in 
 front of the door of Gaffey's big school, at Sev- 
 enth Avenue, while the other one was standing 
 near the curb. I m.oved towards Twenty-third 
 Street again, and took a few steps in the direc- 
 tion of Sixth Avenue. The first one began to 
 follow me, whereupon I turned back and went 
 as far as Twenty-second Street and Seventh 
 'Avenue. There I stood at a comparatively dark 
 spot round the corner. Both of them came to- 
 gether as far as Twenty-second Street, and then 
 one of them went down Seventh Avenue and 
 the other Twenty-second Street. Now it was 
 my turn to go home, and so I did. 
 
 I used to go every Sunday morning to Twenty- 
 tliird Street Y. M. C. A., and, sitting in front 
 
242 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 of one of the windows on the ground floor, read 
 my paper. On the first day of March a pursy 
 old man of about sixty, with dirty clothes, was 
 sitting in front of the window. As soon as I 
 took a seat opposite him, he said: "Have you 
 heard about the murder of a great chum of 
 President Roosevelt?" 
 
 "No, I have not," I said to him. 
 
 "Here it is," he said, ofifering me his paper; 
 "you can read it." 
 
 After reading it, I said, "The murder seems 
 to have been committed just for a trifle." 
 
 "Yes," he said, and then, directing my atten- 
 tion to a young man sleeping on a sofa, added: 
 "H!ow mean the rich people of this country are! 
 They never care for the poor. That poor young 
 man probably did not have a pillow last night 
 upon which to rest his head. Indeed, they are 
 very bad. I would not stay in this country if I 
 could afford to go to another country; for ex- 
 ample, France, where everything is cheap and 
 the climate mild and healthy." Then he asked 
 me of my trade, the whereabouts of my room, 
 and whether I were at work or not. "Do you 
 see that young man?" he said again. "He is 
 sleeping yet, poor man! Do you know John 
 Rockefeller?" 
 
 "He is the richest man in this country," I said, 
 "so far as I know." 
 
 "He is as rich as he is mean," he said. "He 
 never cares for the poor. I wish I was in some 
 other country, or could afford to go. I have been 
 out of work for four weeks." 
 
 This talk naturally reminded me of the two 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 243 
 
 men who had pursued me only a few days ago, 
 evidently to frighten me, and now this old man 
 was' trying to induce me to leave the country. 
 There could be no doubt that at the background 
 of all this stood the Intellectually-higher-than- 
 man Woman, from whom the orders had been 
 emanating. 
 
 The old man would be seen there every Sun- 
 day, but I never went near him, nor had any 
 more talk with him. By this she made me to 
 understand, however, that I was still watched, 
 as I had been for the last four years ; that I could 
 not escape her vigilance. 
 
 One evening, when I came to my room, I 
 found two books on my desk, "The Wheel of 
 Life," by Ellen Glasgow, and "The Jungle," by 
 Upton Sinclair. One of the contents of the for- 
 mer reads : "In Which a Lie is the Better Part of 
 Truth." Thus she had sent me a ten-cent novel 
 instead of her Bible, to justify lying. I did not 
 tell one lie for the four years during which I 
 had been constantly subjected to abusive treat- 
 ment, while the lies that she had spoken or made 
 others speak, in behalf of her were beyond cal- 
 culation. 
 
 I would recommend for her reading "Anglican 
 Difficulties," by Cardinal Newman, a far better 
 book than "The Wheel of Life." The following 
 passage on page 190 should interest her : 
 
 "The Church holds that it were better for sun 
 and moon to drop from the heavens, for the earth 
 to fail, and for all the many millions upon it to 
 die of starvation in extremest agony, so far as 
 
244 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 temporal affliction goes, than that one soul, I 
 will not say should be lost, but commit one single 
 venial sin, should tell one wilful untruth, though 
 it harmed no one." 
 
 What was she going to do if I were a liar 
 like herself? It is quite evident that a truth- 
 ful man is always the loser at first in his deal- 
 ings with a liar. But woe to the liar who drives 
 the truthful to desperation by using his veracity 
 as a weapon against him! The reaction is more 
 than equal to the action. "Who ever knew truth 
 put to the worst in a free and open encounter ?" 
 
 But why did she send "The Jungle"? What 
 else could she have to teach? What new lesson 
 to give me? I took it for a challenge to follow 
 Upton Sinclair's example, write a book, and 
 expose to the world what she had done to me. 
 This was the hardest demand that could have 
 been made upon me, or any other one in my 
 place; nevertheless, I accepted the challenge. I 
 made up my mind to devote the two following 
 years to the study of English, and then try to 
 oblige her. 
 
 "Who gave you these two books to put them 
 in my room?" I asked the housekeeper the next 
 day. 
 
 "Nobody," she said; "I put them there so you 
 could read." 
 
 I wondered if she, the wife of a bricklayer, did 
 have a private library, and was so generous and 
 kind-hearted as to supply her roomers, number- 
 ing over a dozen, with books, to say nothing 
 about the miraculous selection of the books, just 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 245 
 
 the ones I was very much in need of. I had my 
 room for two months, but she gave me no more 
 books. 
 
 To me it was clear enough, as it should be to 
 the reader, that she was given a dollar or two for 
 her service, or at best merely to please the other 
 party she would not hesitate to tell me as many 
 lies as there were cents in a dollar. I made an- 
 other resolution on the same day, viz., never to 
 put any more questions of the same nature to 
 anyone else, and thus to give no occasion to tell 
 Hes. 
 
 I had despaired of finding a truthful man 
 among the lower class. Could there be found 
 some among the higher class, or was the chair 
 of George Washington left vacant? To take a 
 lantern like the Greek philosopher, and go about 
 in search of one at daytime would have ended 
 in failure. The highest class was inapproachable 
 to me, but, thanks to the printing press, I could 
 read their books, although the writings of an 
 author always reflect the best side of him; in 
 fact, some of them will tell us to do what they 
 would not do themselves. Assuming the philo- 
 sophers and moralists to occupy the summit of 
 a nation, I made up my mind to read their ethi- 
 cal treatises. I perused first that of Jeremy 
 Bentham, and here is what he says of lying: 
 
 "Falsehood, take it by itself, consider it as not 
 being accompanied by any other material circum- 
 stances, nor therefore productive of any material 
 effects, can never, upon the principal of utility, 
 constitute any offense at all." 
 
246 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 Eight plus seven equals thirteen, is not a lie 
 or falsehood, but merely a harmless error 
 or mistake, and does not constitute an offense; 
 while a lie or falsehood is always influential in 
 producing some material effect. When I enter in 
 the debit side of my account, eight dollars plus 
 seven dollars equal thirteen dollars, and in the 
 credit side eight dollars plus seven dollars equal 
 fifteen dollars or more, this is more than an error 
 — it is a lie, falsehood, deception, fraud. Sidg- 
 wick is more explicit in this point. He says: 
 "Nor do. we expect that a tradesman in describ- 
 ing his goods should frankly point out their de- 
 fects to his customers." 
 
 Think of a jeweler selling a flawed diamond as 
 perfect, or an imitation for a genuine one. Is 
 not this fraud ? He does not sell the article he 
 speaks of but one entirely different. Sidgwick 
 continues : 
 
 "If we may even kill in defense of ourselves 
 and others, it seems strange if we may not lie, 
 if lying will defend us better against a palpable 
 invasion of our rights. . . . Those who ask 
 questions which they have no right to ask will 
 have lies told them; nor, again, should we be re- 
 strained from pronouncing it lawful to meet de- 
 ceit with deceit merely by the fear of impairing 
 the security which rogues now derive from the 
 veracity of honest men. . . . Few will hesi- 
 tate to lie to an invalid, nor shrink from telling 
 fictions to children. ... It is not uncom- 
 monly said that in defense of a secret we may 
 not lie. . . . That the most important truths 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 247 
 
 of religion cannot be conveyed into the minds of 
 ordinary men, except by being enclosed, as it 
 were, in a shell of fiction. . . . The lawyer 
 is justified in lying. . . . Persons may be de- 
 ceived by the reply that one is 'not at home' to 
 an inconvenient visitor." 
 
 In the end he tries to reduce to a general rule 
 as to under what circumstances one may be al- 
 lowed to lie. 
 
 "But if the lawfulness of benevolent deception 
 in any case be admitted, I do not see how we 
 can decide and how far it is admissible, except 
 by considerations of expediency; that is, by 
 weighing the gain of any particular deception 
 against the imperilment of mutual confidence in- 
 volved in all violation of truth." 
 
 When the immediate gain of self is weighed 
 against that of others to be realized in the fu- 
 ture in the partial scale of blindness and selfish- 
 ness of the man of to-day, who prefers a present 
 gain to a greater remote one and greatly over- 
 rates a personal advantage to the opposing in- 
 terests of society; the latter is largely neutral- 
 ized and in some cases utterly outweighed by 
 the former. 
 
 Quoting from a contribution to "Mind," by 
 Felix Adler, a critique of Kant's ethics : 
 
 "And here again I can see no reason why the 
 rule of prevarication should be self-defeating, in 
 case falsehood were to become general. Let us 
 
248 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 consider for a moment how such a plan would 
 work. In the first place, there would be one 
 element of certainty upon which we could al- 
 ways rely. Everything that a man said to us 
 would be sure not to be true." 
 
 The experience of this essayist would have 
 been entirely different had he spent a few years 
 in a community where falsehood was general. 
 I have had some experience of the kind. For 
 three years everyone that came in contact with 
 me was a hired liar; the result of this was that 
 I spoke to no one for the following three years. 
 This is equivalent to saying that under such a 
 state of things society dissolves, or is reduced 
 to an aggregation such as prevails among the 
 so-called gregarious animals. Progress and civi- 
 lization become impossible. 
 
 John Bascom takes a bolder step by introduc- 
 ing theft as an innocent action. 
 
 " 'Thou shalt not steal' is a tabulated law of 
 duty, but theft is scarcely capable of universal 
 definition, as it passes by a sliding scale into 
 doubtful actions, and through these into actions 
 wholly innocent." 
 
 He cites no example of "innocent theft," but 
 it would seem as if we shall be allowed to steal 
 leather, like St. Crispin, from the rich, and 
 make shoes for the poor. 
 
 A. Bain, J. S. Mill, N. Porter, H. Spencer 
 (in his "Relative Ethics"), T. Thily; in fact, al- 
 most all the hedonists, eudemonists, evolution- 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 249 
 
 ists, and pragmatists justify lying, and this 
 mainly for two reasons. 
 
 I. Because some of them were jurists rather 
 than moralists. They treated of ethics from a 
 legal rather than philosophical point of view, 
 having for object of investigation the expedi- 
 diency of the positive institutions rather than the 
 ultimate principles of right conduct. The field 
 of ethics is much wider than that of the posi- 
 tive laws; the former comprises the latter, and 
 there are eternal grounds of morality, it being 
 co-extensive with life as conditioned on the 
 earth, while positive laws, strictly so called, are 
 relative to the stage in development of life. 
 They are supplementary to the moral laws, and 
 have but temporary application to limit each 
 man's activities, necessitated by the simultane- 
 ous activities of others. Government,* "a neces- 
 sary evil," will be unnecessary when all men 
 spontaneously obey duty. 
 
 These juridical moralists tell us that from the 
 highest military officer to the common soldier, 
 to whom is entrusted the nation's defense, neces- 
 sarily practice deception upon the enemy in war, 
 when "force and fraud are the two cardinal vir- 
 trues" ; also that falsehood is often the only 
 means of preventing a criminal from accom- 
 plishing a crime or entrapping him if accom- 
 plished. 
 
 * Government is used here in a restricted sense, as 
 this concerns us here. Its other functions — regulative, 
 educational, hygienic, etc., are irrelevant to the ques- 
 tion under discussion. In the discharge of such duties 
 it does not resort to mendacity. 
 
250 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 When a rifle is given a man for the express 
 purpose of shooting his fellow-creatures, to tell 
 him, in the meanwhile, not to deviate from the 
 path of veracity would be as absurd as the giv- 
 ing of an umbrella to a man overboard in order 
 to keep himself dry from rain. It would be 
 equivalent to advising him to swallow the camel 
 but strain the gnat. A truthful murderer is con- 
 tradictory to common sense. 
 
 Or, again; people would feel very much dis- 
 appointed should a lecturer upon physiology, as 
 previously announced, tell the audience that 
 quinine sulphate is an excellent febrifuge, or cas- 
 tor oil a mild cathartic. This is what people ex- 
 pect to hear from a physician, but not from a 
 physiologist. The latter treats of the general 
 structure and functions of the healthy organ- 
 isms ; it ignores imperfections and derangements. 
 So, likewise, the moralist treats the healthy, per- 
 fect man, while the former takes account of 
 abnormal actions with a view to bringing the 
 organism to the normal, healthy state. 
 
 The man of medicine is allowed, now and then, 
 to administer a certain quantity of medicine, 
 which is in the majority of cases poison, in order 
 to kill the germ and save the man. The enemy 
 in war and the criminals of a country represent 
 diseased persons, and the great doctor, the Gov- 
 ernment, is justified in administering falsehood 
 (poisonous medicine), and, if necessary, get 
 them in the hospital (jail), until they are cured 
 of the disease. But just as an ordinary man is 
 liable to prosecution as a criminal for adminis- 
 tering medicine to any person, be he ill or not; 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 251 
 
 in like manner a similar charge, expressed in 
 public opinion, is to be brought against anyone 
 who practices deception upon a fellow-citizen, 
 seeing that the positive law can take no cogniz- 
 ance of it. 
 
 To tell a lie implies either to profess one's self 
 a criminal or consider the one spoken to as such. 
 We may discard the first alternative, as no one 
 will regard himself other than respectable; as to 
 the second, it is entirely unwarrantable to tak^ 
 every one as a criminal, until he can prove him- 
 self to be otherwise, like the Intellectually-higher- 
 than-man Woman, who called me first a "scamp," 
 on account of forcing the girl to propose; next 
 she took me for a woman-hater, or one descended 
 from parents addicted to intoxicants; then "I 
 would (keep company with the girls) if I could, 
 but I could not, because I was a married man," 
 or I had no manhood; next for a leader of a 
 gang of blackmailers ; then for an anarchist, the 
 would-be murderer of her daughter; in fact, 
 everything that has a contemptible meaning at- 
 tached to it. Thus she watched me for six years 
 as a cat does the mouse in a hole. Such be- 
 havior cannot but lead to grave consequences, 
 and this book fully corroborates this. 
 
 The pain and disadvantage ensuing to society, 
 in increased suspicion, mutual distrust, impaired 
 credit, from lying, far outweigh the immediate 
 advantage gained by the liar. A man of good 
 morals greatly prefers being deceived to deceiv- 
 ing; would rather suffer than inflict suffering. 
 The questions the answer to which is Hkely to ex- 
 pose the respondent or anyone connected with 
 
252 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 him to shame, trouble or loss, are impertinent 
 questions; one should be a refusal to answer. 
 Those who consider such behavior as rude and 
 offensive, and prefer a he courteously expressed, 
 are to be excluded from the circle of friends. 
 
 There is an analogy, ridiculous to some though 
 it may seem, between mathematics and men- 
 dacity. The former is the most general, simple 
 and abstract science; the latter is the most gen- 
 eral, simple and abstract offense. The former is 
 necessarily and rigorously universal; there is no 
 science that can dispense with the application of 
 mathematical analysis, nor is there a crime that 
 can be committed without the practice of false- 
 hood. All the sciences may be reduced to mathe- 
 matics; all crimes may be reduced to lying; no 
 truthful man can be a criminal. 
 
 The positive law does not consider lying, from 
 its abstract nature, as a crime. It is difficult of 
 proof, discovery, and detection, excepting a cer- 
 tain class of lies which are comparatively easy 
 of detection and serves its end fairly well. The 
 law calls them perjury, and punishes those who 
 are found guilty of it. Before the tribunal of 
 morality, however, there is no difference between 
 a perjury and lie; in other words, a perjurer is 
 a liar, and, conversely, a liar is a perjurer. Those 
 who abstain from perjury but not from lying, 
 show their disrespect for moral laws, lack of 
 sense of right and wrong. Such are to be 
 brought to obedience under threat of punish- 
 ment. But the true moralist feels himself 
 bound to obey the law without being urged by 
 external authority. He feels a blind pressure 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 253 
 
 towards the right. This is the kind of man of 
 whom the world is very much in need. 
 
 Those who consider lying as immoral under 
 any circumstances greatly exceed the other class 
 in number. E. Kant, P. Janet, H. Calderwood, 
 A. Comte, M. W. Wundt, J. Martineau, T. H. 
 Green, J. Wilson, T. Fowler, G. J. Fichtes, and 
 many others belong to this class, but the for- 
 mer class has many more followers than the lat- 
 ter. For what a man had rather were true, he 
 more readily believes. And who is the one that 
 does not like lying, an easy way to get out of 
 difficulty or gain the desired end? "Peace and 
 Prosperity" cries one and all the rest believe him. 
 A doctrine which is in sympathy with human 
 nature, and gives a promise of fulfilment of 
 hopes and longings, is readily accepted though 
 it may not be true. Were the healing properties 
 of medicines to be judged by their palatibleness 
 a large portion of them would be laid aside as 
 useless or injurious. It is not what is comfort- 
 able and pleasant, that is to be believed, but what 
 is true. 
 
 Dr. James Martineau has a graphic descrip- 
 tion given of the feelings, reasoning and behav- 
 ior of the liar. I can do no better than quote 
 verbatim. 
 
 "Besides the agreement between thoughts and 
 words, there is the agreement between thoughts 
 and things. . . . He has tampered with the 
 order of facts which God has made true : he 
 wants us to think of them not as they are, but 
 as it suits him that we should imagine. He de- 
 
254 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 dines to accept the consequence of truth, and 
 quarrels with the reahzed order of the world, as 
 soon as he is hard pressed by it and it threatens 
 to baffle his designs; so he rebels against it, and 
 takes to the crooked ways of his own cunning. 
 . . . The explanation of the Apostle Peter, 
 'Thou hast not lied unto men only, but unto 
 God,' holds good of every lie. . . . A lie is 
 not only a human delinquency but an impiety." 
 
 2. The erroneous assumption of pleasure or 
 happiness as the basis of morality, whereby ly- 
 ing is made a good means of easily avoiding 
 pain or gaining some pleasurable end. 
 
 What is pleasure? A poor by-product or cor- 
 relate of what subserves life; an agreeable sen- 
 sation relative to the organic structure of the 
 being, its states, age, habits, frequency of re- 
 petition. To make pleasure, such a changable, 
 unstable and indiscernible feeling conducing to 
 indefinite ends, the ultimate goal to which man, 
 an insignificant phenomenal being of a short 
 span of life in an infinity of life, should tend, is 
 to nullify morality. 
 
 We do feed our domestic animals, shelter 
 them, and look after their health : we build hives 
 for our bees, and put them, if possible, in the 
 vicinity of water and flowers ; in neither case we 
 attain our goal, although they may be well 
 pleased, happy, and comfortable. We expect 
 that the horse shall draw the coach or wagon, 
 the cow give milk, and the bees make honey for 
 us. The sick horse, the uncared cow, and the 
 wandering bee are ill-adapted to perform what 
 is expected of them, 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 255 
 
 Pain and pleasure attend every degree of life, 
 both of them are necessary for its evolution, and 
 neither would have any meaning apart from 
 the other. Pain is the warning, a signboard 
 marked "Danger," set up along the pathway of 
 life, that we are not what we ought to be, that 
 we are unfit, physically, or intellectually, or spir- 
 itually, or in all of them, to discharge our duties. 
 A man well provided with physical necessities, 
 well educated and cultured, feels, as a rule, 
 happy; but this is far from being the end of 
 life; this is merely an indication that he is fit to 
 enter upon his duty ordained by God; or, in 
 analogy to our domestic animals, he is well 
 qualified to draw the coach of the creator, give 
 milk or prepare honey for him. 
 
 There are not many who doubt the existence 
 of some author of the universe, call him God, 
 Creator, World's Spirit, just as you will; and 
 although pleasure or happiness has so blinded 
 our moralists for a few centuries, as to be quite 
 unable to see anything beyond it, nevertheless 
 the voice of the author of the world has all this 
 while been declaring as to what our duties in 
 life are. If the author of the universe is an 
 incorporeal spirit, as we believe him to be, we 
 cannot expect of him to speak to us like one of 
 our fellow-creatures. He can and does com- 
 municate His will through uniform natural laws, 
 first principles, ultimate truths, or axioms. 
 Now our task will be to make a thorough search 
 in Nature for principles whereon to base moral 
 conduct. 
 
 Spinoza said, "All life tends to persevere in 
 
256 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 life." This is a uniformity to be met with in 
 Nature that admits of no exception. Among us 
 the highest value is set upon life, violation of 
 which is a capital crime. Now this is God's 
 voice speaking to us to preserve and prolong 
 our life as much as it lies in our power so to 
 do ; nor has mankind or even the irrational crea- 
 tures shown any reluctance to obey this com- 
 mand of self-preservation. 
 
 A second uniformity which cannot escape 
 notice is that all life tends to perpetuate itself. 
 The desire of reproduction is as universal as 
 that of self-preservation. 
 
 This is a second command of God enjoining 
 upon us the duty of prolonging the short span of 
 life indefinitely by living in our offsprings. 
 Life which is only a postulate, a principle, for 
 us is what Nature cares the most to preserve 
 and in the meanwhile improve in order to raise 
 to a higher state. Nature prefers a life of one 
 hundred years duration (omitting for the pres- 
 ent considerations that concern rational beings 
 only and to which we shall soon recur) lived in 
 pain, to one of fifty lived in comfort; and a life 
 of fifty years begetting offspring to one of a 
 double or more length of time, but leaving none 
 to take its place. 
 
 These two principles, self-preservation and 
 procreation have been well observed by irrational 
 as well as rational creatures, to which fact is 
 mainly due the continuation of life on the earth 
 for countless generations. 
 
 Upon these two principles an animal ethics 
 may be framed, so simple and plain as to be ex- 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 257. 
 
 pressed in a few lines. It is the duty of every 
 animal, first, to preserve self and thus prolong 
 its life as much as possible, and second, beget 
 its kind. A gregarious habit in each species is 
 more favorable in some cases than one isolated 
 from the rest in pairs. But in the case of man, 
 the rational being, the presence of a third prin- 
 ciple makes the framing of a system of ethics 
 so complicated as to almost defy a complete 
 solution. 
 
 When the attention of an animal is drawn to 
 an object that has no life, examines it with a 
 view to finding out if it is something edible or 
 not; if alive, whether it be a friend or foe. 
 Here ends everything, its curiosity goes no fur- 
 ther. But the case is entirely different with a 
 human being; take^ a little child, for example, 
 he pelts his father, mother, brother, sister, in 
 fact, anyone at hand, with questions, "Mamma, 
 why does the clock tick?" "What makes the 
 wheel go round?" "What is this for, what is 
 the use of that?" As soon as we pass to a man, 
 be he a scientist, chemist, philosopher, or astron- 
 omer, questions about rain, lightning, fire, elec- 
 tricity; life, consciousness, suns and planets, be- 
 come innumerable. The most superstitious sav- 
 age is not exempt from this curiosity. Thus 
 there is in man a universal desire for progress, 
 and this constitutes the third principle of moral 
 conduct. The three principles of moral actions 
 are, therefore, preservation of self, procreation 
 and progress. 
 
 Progress, in fact, is rightly predicated not only 
 of rational but irrational creatures as well. But 
 
258 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 there is an important difiference between the 
 two. The former may be called conscious prog- 
 ress as distinguished from the latter which is 
 unconscious. 
 
 Inferior animals respond by physical changes 
 to changes in their environment. Their bodily 
 structure is modified by natural selection, while 
 man adapts himself to his environment without 
 modification of bodily structure; he meets the 
 changes by intelligent contrivances. The for- 
 mer is effected by blind natural agents; the lat- 
 ter, by the mind of man, a faculty capable of 
 ideally resuscitating and combining relations not 
 present to the senses. The first is a process too 
 slow and involves wasteful expenditure on the 
 part of the animal, with a result quite inconsid- 
 erable in comparison with the second, which is 
 so rapid as to accomplish in an instant what 
 Nature takes ages to do for the animals. With 
 the rise of intelligence man became the veritable 
 heir and ruler of the world. 
 
 Now it may be said of progress ir general, 
 the third principle of moral actions, that it has 
 achieved considerable, and is still advancing in 
 a rapid pace with a prospect of indefinite con- 
 tinuation. But it is evident that progress would 
 have been impossible had the human species 
 lived isolated from each other. In such a case 
 the struggle with Nature would be found so 
 intense that the efforts to provide food, clothing, 
 shelter, and to ward off enemies would take all 
 the time and energy. 
 
 Society, no doubt, was not formed with a 
 view to progress. Why and how it was formed 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 259 
 
 is a question, the answer to which is irrelevant 
 to the problem under discussion. But it is a 
 well established fact that the human species can 
 make no progress in any branch of research, un- 
 dertaking or enterprise except by means of that 
 union which constitutes human society. 
 
 The child born to society inherits all the ma- 
 terial and mental wealth accumulated by the pre- 
 ceding generations, in the form of forests felled, 
 houses built, roads constructed, rapacious beasts 
 annihilated, fields tilled, rapid and inexpensive 
 means of transportation established between dif- 
 ferent localities. Besides these tangible products 
 of labor he inherits the improved methods of 
 labor, by which he is capacitated to produce the 
 maximum of result with the minimum expendi- 
 ture of labor. He has at his disposal vast ac- 
 cumulations of knowledge; he knows the physi- 
 cal and chemical properties of liquids, gases, and 
 solid substances. Discovered laws of Nature, 
 mathematical formulae, ethical, politcal, philo- 
 sophical and psychological speculations are at 
 his service. 
 
 Language, which is clearly a product of social 
 organism, gradually elaborated under the pres- 
 sure of social needs, furnishes the most strik- 
 ing example of this process. It is the most im- 
 portant ready-made instrument that the child in- 
 herits from the society in which he lives. By 
 learning the language he can speak, meditate, 
 and combine relations not present to the senses; 
 he learns the primary elements of grammar and 
 logic; lays down the foundations of philosoph- 
 ical and psychological speciil^tigng by the us? 
 
26o The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 of such words, as matter, force, substance, con- 
 sciousness, thought, will, emotion. The same is 
 true to a certain extent of every branch of in- 
 quiry. Without the knowledge of language it is 
 inconceivable of any but the simple process of 
 thought taking place in the mind. Progress in 
 the arts and applied sciences would be almost 
 impossible as these are based on pure science and 
 the latter upon thought. 
 
 It is manifest from the consideration of this 
 how much a child owes to society. We prize these 
 acquirements so highly that no degree of hap- 
 piness will induce us to leave society and live 
 an isolated life. We consider it far better to be 
 born amid the fierce struggle of civilization than 
 in some stranded nation free from all the flow 
 of enterprise and knowledge. We choose the dis- 
 satisfied, ambitious life of Socrates rather than 
 that of Plato's beatified oyster, or Aristotle's 
 perpetual childhood attended with a great share 
 of ignorant bliss. 
 
 Thus, organized society is indispensable to the 
 attainment of the desired alternative. Social 
 order is the primary condition which makes in- 
 dividual development possible, and this, taken 
 collectively, conduces to the development of so- 
 ciety as an organism, implying general progress. 
 The vast accumulations of wealth, which is 
 claimed to belong to a fortunate minority, has 
 been produced by the members of the society; 
 nor has wealth intrinsic value apart from so- 
 ciety. The millions of a millionaire lose all 
 value when both are placed in an uninhabited 
 island. When Robinson Crusoe found a lump of 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 261 
 
 pure gold he threw it aside indignantly, and 
 said, "I wish you were a grain of wheat." What 
 a man, be he poor or rich, owes to the society 
 is entirely beyond his means and ability to re- 
 pay, even if a life of a million years be granted 
 him; in fact, such prolongation of life would 
 only augment his debt. 
 
 This is the description of the bright side of 
 the society, the benefits we reap of it. But as 
 every rose has thorns, so there is a thorny side 
 to the question. Society bestows its gifts upon 
 certain conditions. Certain laws are revealed by 
 the nature of things in every society, due ob- 
 servance of which is seen to be indispensable in 
 order to derive the maximum of beneficial re- 
 suh. 
 
 The duties consequent upon social organiza- 
 tion are two-fold, negative and positive. The 
 former enjoins upon each member abstinence 
 from theft, mendacity, murder, and such acts 
 which are prejudicial to the interests of the rest. 
 There is to be found a great number of indi- 
 viduals in every society unwilling spontaneously 
 to obey these laws, hence the institution of gov- 
 ernment with all its punitive laws. The latter, 
 to show good-will and render assistance to those 
 who are in need. 
 
 We are now about to enter into the science 
 of ethics, which is out of the scope of this work ; 
 nevertheless, before passing to the narration of 
 the story, which was interrupted a few pages 
 back by a discussion of mendacity, I will bring 
 forward a few points wherein I differ from 
 those moralists whose ethical treatises I read be- 
 
262 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 fore I undertook the writing of this book. 
 
 Jesus gave us a Golden Rule, "Thou shalt 
 love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and 
 with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and 
 with all thy mind; and thy neighbor as thyself." 
 
 Elsewhere he explains what he means by 
 "love" in saying that, "If ye love me, ye will 
 keep my commandments." To love God, then, 
 means to keep His commandments. His com- 
 mandments are to be found in the Bible. Add 
 to this scores of volumes of commentaries writ- 
 ten by as many theologians, and the vagueness 
 of the rule becomes manifest, and knowledge 
 and obedience to it not an easy task for the ordi- 
 nary man. While "love" in the latter part can- 
 not have a like meaning, otherwise we should be 
 expected to keep the commandments of our 
 neighbor. I leave the finding of the correct 
 meaning of it to the commentators or theo- 
 logians, and pass on to give a rule, which I will 
 call "Diamond Rule" in order to distinguish 
 from the Golden Rule. "Live by thine own 
 labor." This was given six thousand years ago 
 by God to Adam, "In the sweat of thy face shalt 
 thou eat bread." This is the most important law 
 of God given to man, the rational being. This 
 rule has not been observed by mankind with 
 sufficient scrupulousness. A few inferences 
 from this rule inevitably follow which have been 
 ignored. Startling and revolting though they 
 may seem to some, are, nevertheless, true. 
 
 I. A thief or robber lives upon the labor of 
 others; so does the man who lives by charity. 
 Both of them break nature's first law. 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 263 
 
 2. I have often heard people say, "I have 
 very little to do, or there is hardly anything to 
 do, but I get very high wages." To the same 
 class belong this kind of people. Somebody else 
 must be working for them; they live by his 
 labor. Each has to see that he renders a service 
 equivalent in value to the wages he receives. 
 The necessities of life, as food, raiment, shelter, 
 are not provided by nature but only in response 
 to our effort and labor. Each man has to do 
 his share in the production thereof. I should 
 very much like to hear people say, "I work for 
 every cent I get, and I am proud or glad of 
 it." 
 
 3. When a man calls me a thief, evidently he 
 means that I live upon others' labor. The man 
 who gives me alms or charity does the very 
 same thing; the former, by word or expression; 
 the latter, by action. Both are guilty of libel. 
 
 By this I do not mean to say that the rich 
 have to use their wealth exclusively for them- 
 selves, leaving the poor to starve. The sick, 
 the crippled, the enfeebled by age, are to be 
 supported by the society, as some of them 
 are being supported by the rest of the 
 family to which they belong. Society is a family 
 on a large scale. But there is a class of poor 
 people who cannot justly be held responsible 
 for their poverty, being mainly due to the de- 
 fective ordering or ill-management of the so- 
 ciety during our transitional state; in other 
 words, each member of which the society is 
 composed is responsible for it, but the bad con- 
 sequences do not equally fall upon all, but 
 
264 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 mainly on those who are ill-placed and ill-pro- 
 vided in the battle of life. There are some 
 who even reap advantages from the very cir- 
 cumstance which is a source of suffering for 
 the unfortunate. Still, poverty should not 
 rob one of his self-respect and make him for- 
 get the law of living by one's own labor. Such 
 an one, apart from the consideration of the duty 
 of self-preservation imposed by nature upon all, 
 not excluding the irrational animals, has to pre- 
 fer death by starvation to living on others' 
 labor, even though it be administered to him in 
 the form of charity. Only in obedience to this 
 duty he ought not to refuse assistance rendered 
 to him, as the lesser of the two evils. 
 
 Turning our attention to the rich for a mo- 
 ment, it was said of them that they accumulate 
 their wealth through the society, that it retains 
 its value as long as society exists, that they owe 
 so much to the society wherein they live — the 
 source of their material acquisitions and intel- 
 lectual acquirements, and that by the distribu- 
 tion of their possessions they cannot but repay 
 a very insignificant part of their debt. The 
 rich are under great obligations. They are the 
 stewards of society; but they have to use their 
 wealth wisely to produce the best results. 
 
 When a rich man meets or hears of one 
 struggling hard for existence and falling short 
 of the mark of making a decent living, and 
 who cannot be held accountable for his short- 
 comings or incapacity, which is the result of 
 disaster, sickness, mishap or misfortune, he is 
 morally bound to extend a helping hand to him. 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 265 
 
 But he must know that in so doing he is step- 
 ping on forbidden grounds. The poor man 
 naturally is averse to accept any assistance. The 
 thought of living by the labor of others must 
 be repugnant to him. He can only be induced 
 in remembrance of the duty of preservation of 
 self and those of others dependent upon him. 
 And when the poor man is prevailed upon to ac- 
 cept such aid, he has achieved a heroic deed, 
 has undergone a humiliation for the sake of the 
 duty, a humiliation which he would have been 
 unwilling to undergo under the most adverse 
 circumstance. It is for the rich to thank him, 
 write once a month, or at least once a year, to 
 express his obligation to him for being kind 
 enough to use part of his wealth in the best pos- 
 sible way. Not until the rich and the poor 
 feel and behave themselves in the manner here 
 described will I predicate morality of either 
 class. Those unwilling to work are prodigies; 
 they are to be left to the discipline of nature 
 to bear the painful results of defying her laws. 
 In such cases any material help will be the means 
 of prolonging the evil. 
 
 Here another question suggests itself for con- 
 sideration — namely, the part which the moral 
 feelings, strictly so-called, certain emotions, play 
 in moral conduct. Aristotle divided the virtues 
 into two classes, moral and intellectual. A good 
 many have followed his example. It is admitted 
 that man, or rather civilized man, possesses a 
 complex group of emotions — internal feeling or 
 sense (Hume), moral sense (Hutcheson), con- 
 
266 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 science (Butler), leading him to seek the right 
 and avoid the wrong. 
 
 Intelligence and morality can never be di- 
 vorced from each other ; on the other hand, pure 
 emotion of any kind, not tinged with intelligence, 
 is entirely unrelated to morality. Irrational ani- 
 mals can only cultivate a gregarious habit, but 
 never enter into that union which constitutes 
 society. And morality outside of a social bond 
 is inconceivable. There can be no emotion, or 
 acts prompted by the emotions, having moral 
 value, and such value may not be traced to be 
 entirely due to the intellectual element of which 
 the agent possesses. Acts committed without 
 the knowledge of the agent as to the "why" and 
 "wherefore" are invariably unmoral. 
 
 Adam Smith went so far as to base all moral 
 action on sympathy. He could have made no 
 greater mistake. Sympathy is a human frailty, 
 a disease, a vice. Such are pity, mercy, even 
 love of every kind, and all the emotions. 
 
 Seneca regarded pity as a positive vice; that 
 only diseased eyes grow moist in seeing tears 
 in others' eyes. This implies weakness of nerves, 
 that leads some to laugh when others laugh, and 
 yawn when others yawn. 
 
 When it was told Anaxagoras that his son 
 had died, he said: "I never supposed that I had 
 begotten an immortal." 
 
 I cannot think of an action which loses the 
 moral value when committed unaccompanied with 
 feelings of sympathy or love; nor an immoral 
 act to which moral value can be given when 
 prompted by love, sympathy, pity, benevolence. 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 267 
 
 It is often said that the feelings of sympathy 
 have constantly been growing deeper and wider 
 with the gradual advance in civilization. This 
 is equivalent of saying that a good many new 
 stars have been created during the last thousand 
 years. The fact is that almost every one of 
 them has been in its respective place for thou- 
 sands of years, but in antiquity people were un- 
 able to see with unaided eyes or imperfect in- 
 struments what we can see with perfected instru- 
 ments. It is intellectual discrimination that is 
 becoming the more refined, and thereby the soli- 
 darity or interdependence of the society in par- 
 ticular, and the humankind in general, is being 
 the better realized. Intelligence is the pioneer 
 of moralization ; it cuts new channels, discovers 
 new territories, and thus enlarges the sphere of 
 emotional activity. 
 
 In the primitive life the most common form 
 of benevolence is hospitality; in later times we 
 have philanthropy. The former implies an ac- 
 cess of the emotive element in the agent over the 
 intellectual; with respect to the latter, the con- 
 verse is true. Hospitality strives to meet an im- 
 mediate demand, and is more akin to blind ma- 
 ternal love; while philanthropy has for its object 
 a whole. nation, the humankind, nay, generations 
 that are to follow. This is clearly the result of 
 a highly developed intelligence capable of mak- 
 ing complex calculations. 
 
 The feelings of hunger and satisfaction, sexual 
 love, love for offspring, and fear, are the primary 
 feelings and emotions which man has in com- 
 mon with the animals ; all of them are unmoral. 
 
268 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 A cat's feeding her kittens, ignorant of the con- 
 sequences, is an unmoral act. But when intel- 
 ligence made its appearance in man, it gave the 
 primary emotions a moral value by assigning 
 them appropriate actions with an end in view. A 
 mother's love for her child, expressed in such 
 acts as nursing, clothing, punishing, with the 
 view to making him a good citizen, is moral. 
 And, conversely, a mother's love may so much 
 predominate the intellectual element as to "spoil" 
 the child, making him lose his initiative and re- 
 sourcefulness, develop an exaggerated sense of 
 the relative importance of itself. In such a case 
 the mother's love becomes immoral. 
 
 Next, intelligence discovers the secondary or 
 faint emotions which are mostly modifications of, 
 or derived from, the primary ones, just as the 
 astronomer discovers the faint stars bv means 
 of his telescope. For instance, of sympathy, ben- 
 evolence, pity, mercy, commiseration, admiration, 
 respect, reverence, enthusiasm: terror, hatred, 
 aversion, disgust, indignation, resentment, mal- 
 evolence, antipathy, malice, envy, jealousy, con- 
 tempt; the former are grades of love, the latter 
 of fear. Intelligence tabulates and classifies 
 them, assigns them appropriate actions. When a 
 certain feeling or emotion leads one to the com- 
 mission of the appropriate act, or an act of others 
 elicits in one the corresponding emotion, and fur- 
 ther, if required, responds to such emotion with 
 right action, the agent is called virtuous and the 
 act moral. Indiscriminate charity, ill-directed 
 sympathy — in fact, all violation of moral laws — 
 imply lack of intellectual discrimination on the 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 269 
 
 part of the agent, acts prompted to the commis- 
 sion by the blind emotions. 
 
 Until two thousand years ago people could not 
 imagine their gods exempt from the sexual love. 
 We cannot imagine Him to be otherwise than 
 exempt from it. I do not think two thousand 
 years will be needed before mankind will come 
 to think of Him as truly He is — possessed of no 
 emotions of any kind whatever. Love, sympathy, 
 mercy, pity, etc., are wrongly predicated of Him 
 because justice and the emotions are opposed 
 to each other. Can God deviate from His course 
 of action marked by justice under the influence 
 of some emotion or emotions? God is just, a 
 quality, an attribute, far superior to the best emo- 
 tion known to us. It comprises all the emotions 
 in a perfect equilibrium. The rise of an emotion 
 implies an unbalanced state of mind, or the men- 
 tal faculties out of equilibrium, a ruffled sea. 
 
 We poor mortals find ourselves too weak and 
 helpless amidst the blind, irresistible forces of the 
 world, coming we know not whence, and going 
 we know not whither. We are desirous to be 
 loved, to be assisted, to be comforted in our 
 afflicted moments. We are constantly on the 
 lookout for someone who will infuse hope, give 
 us heart and encouragement when we are in 
 despair. Look at the maidens, advanced in life, 
 who, finding no one to love them, turn to the 
 Church. They imagine God loves them, and find 
 consolation in the thought. Observe old men and 
 women, for whom the world is too dreary. In 
 their descent down the declivity of life's journey 
 they are neglected by the younger generation. 
 
270 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 They are no more objects of interest among their 
 kind as they had been when the blood of youth 
 circulated in their supple bodily frame. They 
 pass their time in prayer. They want to be 
 taken notice of, and loved by God. 
 
 These instances show what we imagine God to 
 be, or what kind of a God the most suits us. 
 But if there is a way of knowing God as He is, 
 it is judging Him by His works; just as a man 
 is known by his works, and "a tree by its fruit." 
 
 The works of God declare His glory, His ma- 
 jesty, His wisdom. That He is infinitely supe- 
 rior to us in intellectual attributes is clearly in- 
 ferred from His works, but as to the emotional 
 attributes, in relation to us, or the sentient crea- 
 tion in general, none can reasonably be predicated 
 of Him. The lightning strikes the good and the 
 bad; the saint's prayer does not save him from 
 the knife of the assassin. Millions of creatures 
 are being slowly tortured to death every minute. 
 Uniform laws prevail everywhere. Each effect 
 has a cause or causes, and a cause invariably pro- 
 duces a certain effect. 
 
 If God tias some teleological purpose in the 
 universe, some definite end in view, and we do 
 constitute a means to that end, which everything 
 tends to corroborate, then prayers, uttered to God 
 for some miraculous aid, should remain unan- 
 swered, as they have invariably remained from" 
 time immemorial, despite the opposed prevailing 
 belief entertained by a majority. 
 
 Why do we pray .'' Clearly for deliverance when 
 in pain, trouble or danger. Had God fed the 
 man from the beginning when hungry, healed him 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 271 
 
 when sick, provided him with raiment when cold, 
 and given another sun to illuminate the world, 
 all the arts and sciences would have been un- 
 known to us, and we would be no better than fat 
 pigs ready for the slaughter-house. God is never 
 so pleased, if I may humanify His ways, as when 
 we are in pain and in search of means of de- 
 liverance. All progress, unconscious or con- 
 scious, which is predicated of the irrational and 
 rational creatures, is due to the feeling of pain 
 and the consequent effort to get rid of it. 
 
 Pain is a stimulant, be it mental or physical. 
 It wakes one up from stupor. A physical pain 
 implies an undue or inadequate discharge of some 
 function of the organism. A mental pain is often 
 indicative of a disorder caused by the defective 
 discharge of functions of some member or mem- 
 bers of the family or the society, as an organism. 
 In both cases the remedy is obtainable here on 
 the earth where we are placed. We are not 
 transported from a celestial region to this planet. 
 We are indigenous creatures. All the elements 
 of which our physical frame is constituted is to 
 be found in this world of ours. So, likewise, 
 every remedy to ward off pain, and all the means 
 of subsistence are to be had here, but only in 
 response to effort and labor. By such effort we 
 discover the laws of nature, the physical, chemi- 
 cal, an organoleptic properties of matter. We 
 learn how to resolve one power of nature into 
 another, how to arm one cosmic force against 
 another, and thus remove every obstacle, subdue 
 every enemy, and proclaim ourselves the rightful 
 possessors and rulers of the world. All this is 
 
272 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 due to the feeling of pain and uneasiness, and 
 tne consequent effort for deliverance. Until the 
 time comes when man will spontaneously co- 
 operate with nature to promote God's purpose as 
 expressed in the order of the universe, pain will 
 be the only spur inciting him to action, as it has 
 been such ever since the first life made its ap- 
 pearance on the earth. When man rises to this 
 stage he will justly be called a moralized being. 
 Pain will be unnecessary for further develop- 
 ment, and no doubt it will be minimized both in 
 extent and intent. But in our present state 
 prayer for removal of pain and suffering is an 
 impiety, an effort to frustrate God in His design, 
 and will justly be unheeded by Him. 
 
 God may be all love; so may Halley's comet, 
 which is approaching us, for all that we know. 
 But judging by His behavior in relation to us, 
 we have good reasons to consider Him as exempt 
 from all the emotions known to us. He is just, 
 impartial, and works by natural laws, cause and 
 effect, and persistence of force. 
 
 If we could imagine a world where birth, 
 death, hunger, fear, sexual and parental love 
 were unknown, we could not imagine the in- 
 habitants of such a world to possess emotions. 
 We believe God to be, according to the teachings 
 of the Bible, such a Being. How can the emo- 
 tions be predicated of Him? With the advance 
 of moralization of humankind, pain, misery, suf- 
 fering will be reduced, and the intensity of the 
 emotions diminished in the same proportion. In 
 a world like ours, where there are birth and 
 death, pleasure and pain, hunger and satisfaction 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 273 
 
 and the sexual impulses, man can never be en- 
 tirely exempt from that perturbation of mind 
 called the emotions ; but he who has the least is 
 the best. Love has been considered the best emo- 
 tion, and is given such a high value as to consider 
 it the essence of God, or His highest attribute. 
 What is love? 
 
 I love a man or woman for some quality or 
 qualities which he or she possesses ; another per- 
 son hates him or her for the very same quality or 
 qualities. One loves his mother, but not his 
 mother-in-law; another his mother-in-law, but 
 not his mother. One loves the Gentile, and hates 
 the Jew; another loves the latter, but hates, or 
 at best is indifferent to, the former. We are now 
 prepared to answer the above question. Love is 
 an emotion excited by some caprice, whim or 
 eccentricity in the agent or patient. What im- 
 portance or reliance can be given such a dis- 
 eased state of the mind? The first place among 
 the virtues has been assigned to it for a number 
 of centuries. It may still be so for the man 
 more akin to the lower animals, but not for the 
 moralized man. 
 
 The man who has the least degree of love, but 
 discharges his duties in life according to the re- 
 quirements of morality, is a saint. One pos- 
 sessed of much love, but defective in the dis- 
 charge of his moral duties, is an animal. A wo- 
 man having a minimum of love but abiding by 
 the principles of morality, is an angel; one af- 
 fectionate but ignorant of her moral duties, is 
 the very demon. This reasoning applies with a 
 greater cogency in respect to the other emotions. 
 
274 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 One discovers a remedy for a certain disease; 
 another, through some contrivance, equips a blind 
 force of nature to serve man. All the world re- 
 joices. This is the kind of emotion which is 
 bound to last and increase in intensity, while th« 
 rest shall diminish with the advance of morali- 
 zation. This is a species of benevolent emotion 
 much more akin to love, but it is not excited by 
 some unstable, variable freak in man, different 
 for each man, and for the same man under dif- 
 ferent circumstance, but by the one and the same 
 cause ; it holds good for all. It is divine, because 
 it is universal. It is unending, because we can 
 read yet but a little, a very insignificant part, in 
 nature's book of infinite secrecy. 
 
 The rich distribute their wealth to the poor; 
 both parties are the losers. The former because 
 their wealth is reduced, the second because their 
 initiative, resourcefulness, self-respect and self- 
 reliance become diminished. But knowledge, 
 science, inventions, and all intellectual acquire- 
 ments are increased when shared. This is the 
 kind of aid, charity, alms, which the moralized 
 man will give to others. It is a source of gen- 
 eral exultation. It is divine, because it is uni- 
 versal. 
 
 We come at last face to face with the one and 
 the last question. What are classes of acts which 
 elicit the feelings of moral approbation or dis- 
 approbation; in other words, the standard by 
 which actions are to be measured ? 
 
 Acts that contribute to the preservation of 
 self, procreation and progress, are moral. 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 275 
 
 This is what God speaks through nature to 
 every one : 
 
 1. Edibles have different degrees of palatable- 
 ness; some are the most grateful, while others 
 are repugnant to the taste ; but their life-sustain- 
 ing properties can never be measured by the de- 
 gree of palatableness. Take cod-liver oil or cas- 
 tor oil, if it prolongs thy life, though unpleasant 
 to the taste. Do not refrain from enduring pain 
 or suffering, mental or physical, if it proves to 
 be on the whole beneficial to thy life. If by some 
 pleasurable activity the same result may be at- 
 tained, give preference to the latter and enjoy it. 
 No impulse is low or high in itself, but is made 
 so by the end it subserves, and also by the means, 
 taking them as separate ends in themselves. 
 
 2. Thy second duty consists in self-perpetua- 
 tion. But if thy offspring will come to this world, 
 traverse the span of life, and depart contributing 
 nothing to the world's progress and betterment, 
 thou mightst just as well have none to take thy 
 place. Raise thy eyes and look round. I create 
 billions of creatures in a day, and destroy an 
 equal number of them in the next. It is quality 
 that counts, and not quantity. Add something, 
 no matter how small, on what thou hast learned 
 from thy parents, and hand it on as a sacred 
 trust to thy children, and inculcate upon them 
 the duty of following thy example. 
 
 3. Thou are the child of the race, born to 
 society, heir of all the ages of its experience. 
 Outside of society thou canst not but scantily 
 provide food, raiment and shelter for thyself; 
 thou art too weak and helpless, hardly able to 
 
276 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 defend thyself from the attack of the rapacious 
 beasts, more powerful and better armed by 
 nature. Thou art indebted to the society for 
 everything thou possessest; have this in mind 
 during all thy life, lest thou forgettest thy great 
 benefactor, for society has no existence apart 
 from the individuals of which thou art one. 
 
 4. Desires in seeking self-satisfaction are not 
 selfish in themselves, unless sought by injury of 
 others; do not stop the fountain that quenched 
 thy thirst, or cut the tree the fruit of which 
 satisfied thy hunger. Devotion to the good of 
 others is not always commendable. Sacrifice of 
 present good for one in future, without com- 
 parison of values, is an unworkable rule. All 
 activity in life is to be harmonized in view of 
 moral ends. A pleasurable or happy life is not 
 to be condemned, nor a painful one preferred, 
 but for a balance of beneficial results as meas- 
 ured by the principles of morality. 
 
 5. When thy physical, intellectual and spiri- 
 tual capacities are developed by assimilation and 
 instruction to the highest point of which the so- 
 ciety is capable, thy duty does not end here. 
 Do not behave like a machine in thy vocation in 
 life, as though adapted to produce certain things 
 and obtain in exchange the means of subsistence, 
 until by wear and tear or senility thou art laid 
 aside or thrown into a grave, and replaced by a 
 new one. After the society has discharged its 
 duty by raising thee to the highest level, thou 
 doest change places with the society. It is for 
 thee hereafter to contribute thy share in the de- 
 velopment of the society. Add something, how- 
 
"Better Part of Truth" 277 
 
 soever little it may be, to what was trusted to 
 thy care. Thy mite will not be refused ; share it 
 with the rest. Intellectual acquirements always 
 increase when shared. This is how societies ad- 
 vance. Considering the greatness of the number 
 of the individuals, and the length of the time to 
 come, the combined result will be miraculous. 
 But if thou givest nothing of worth to the world, 
 leavest no trace before thy departure, thou hast 
 proved thyself a failure, a prodigy, and with such 
 thou shalt be classed and catalogued. 
 
 6. The meaning of thy life is part of the 
 meaning of the universe itself. The purpose of 
 nature is life and growth. Thy moral duty con- 
 sists in assisting her in her purpose. Strive to 
 attain to the highest degree of excellence and 
 perfection of which thy nature is capable. 
 
 This theory of ethics is not opposed to that 
 of the evolutionist, as it predicates of man the 
 capacity of an infinite degree of development, 
 and enjoins upon him the duty of regulating con- 
 duct with a view to that end; nor is it opposed 
 to the doctrine of the intuitionist. The principles 
 are found by intuition. The task of applying the 
 general principles to particular cases is left to the 
 moralist. Nor, again, is it opposed to that of the 
 hedonist, eudemonist, or utilitarianist. Although 
 it does not teach man to aim at pleasure, but the 
 contents of it, yet it considers pleasure a con- 
 comitant to it, and emphasizes the fact that coal 
 cannot be had without the black, nor flowers 
 without their characteristic colors and odors, and 
 that we still ought to have the coal in cold 
 
278 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 weather, even though some mischievous urchin 
 may have painted it white ; it will serve our pur- 
 pose perfectly. But try to have the black with- 
 out the coal, the end in view becomes frustrated. 
 
 When the process of moralization of man ad- 
 vances far enough, moral conduct will be in- 
 separable from pleasure, happiness and utility. 
 
 This theory of ethics expresses our fellow- 
 ship with nature in her purposes, and reconciles 
 opposed moral theories. 
 
'My Name is Legion" 279 
 
 CHAPTER VIII. 
 
 "my name is legion, because we are many.'' 
 
 "O woman, woman, when to ill thy mind 
 Is bent, all hell contains no fouler fiend." 
 
 Having resolved to devote the next two years 
 to the study of the English language and then 
 write a book, I went to a boarding house on 
 West Fourteenth Street. There I rented a bet- 
 ter room, where I could do some reading and 
 writing. I had a pocket dictionary. Later on 
 I paid twenty-five cents and bought a second- 
 hand Webster dictionary, which was my senior 
 by only two years. So far I have made no more 
 additions to the number of the books of my 
 private library. I expected to get books from the 
 circulating libraries, so I made an application for 
 a card at a branch of Carnegie Buildings, but 
 failed to get one, being unable to furnish "proper 
 reference" — someone who owned property. I 
 had to do my readings in the libraries. 
 
 In the boarding house I was given a seat at 
 the dining room at a small table, together with 
 a carpenter, Wm. Huntington, and a rug sales- 
 man, Chas. Hutton. When they asked me my 
 business, I said I was a writer. After supper we 
 
28o The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 usually went to the parlor and had now a little 
 talk, now some reading. 
 
 Everything went all right for only five days. 
 After this, however, I soon noticed the change 
 around me. The Intellectually-higher-than-man 
 Woman made me clearly feel her unwelcome 
 presence in the boarding house in her old aggres- 
 sive way. I was closely catechised by such ques- 
 tions as, "What paper do you write for ?" "How 
 long have you been a writer?" "How much 
 money can you make?" "Did you never work 
 at anything else?" "Do you make translations 
 only, or submit original composition also?" 
 
 For a few days the subject of the talk was al- 
 most exclusively about girls in the old fashion. 
 I kept myself aloof ; I did not have my share 
 in it. Then it changed into murder. Newspapers 
 containing accounts of cases of murder were 
 ofifered to me for my reading. 
 
 "Those who commit murder from jealousy,^' 
 said Hutton one day, "can never sleep. They 
 cannot get the thought of the murder out of 
 their minds, but are constantly haunted by the 
 apparition of their victim, and so they keep the 
 light burning all night." On another day he said : 
 "The Jews have been drawing the wealth of the 
 country. It won't be very long before a gen- 
 eral persecution of the Jews will take place, 
 their wealth be confiscated and distributed among 
 the Americans, to whom it justly belongs." 
 
 That there is a general hatred of Jews in this 
 country, and more of it in other Christian coun- 
 tries, will not be denied by anyone, although 
 some may regret that it is so. Among the lower 
 
"My Name Is Legion" 281 
 
 class, the words "damned" and "Jews" are sel- 
 dom divorced. I had often reminded this class 
 of people about their religion, of which they 
 are so proud as the best one in the world, hav- 
 ing been given them by the Jews, and that Jesus 
 and the apostles were Jews. 
 
 The full extent of the influence of early train- 
 ing upon mind is never so clearly seen as when a 
 Christian kisses the Bible and "cusses" the Jew, 
 without whom the Bible and Christianity would 
 have been unknown. 
 
 Hutton, advised by the Intellectually-higher- 
 than-man Woman, made the above remark about 
 the Jews, expecting me to defend them as be- 
 fore, and thus draw me into the conversation, 
 because I had already begun to keep silence and 
 shun their company; but I said absolutely noth- 
 ing. 
 
 The next day he had something else to tell me, 
 very much like the one he had said the previous 
 day. 
 
 "Do you know the number of those who are 
 out of work in New York alone?" he asked me. 
 
 "No," I said, "I do not know." 
 
 "Two hundred thousand," he said; "a whole 
 army of unemployed men and women. I believe 
 the poor will make a combined attack upon the 
 rich, murder them, and divide the wealth among 
 themselves. Yes," he added, "I honestly believe 
 this." 
 
 "Do you consider yourself belonging to the 
 poor or rich class?" I asked him. "A murderer, 
 or one to be murdered?" 
 
 He kept silence. He did not seem quite pre- 
 
282 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 pared to give an appropriate answer to it. I 
 suppose he had to consult the Intellectually- 
 higher-than-man Woman ahout it. Such a ques- 
 tion was unexpected. 
 
 One afternoon Huntington gave me a copy of 
 the New York Evening Journal, and recom- 
 mended me to read an article on the editorial 
 page, contributed by Mrs. Ella Wheeler Wilcox, 
 in reply to a letter of some sixteen pages, which 
 she said she had received from a Russian anar- 
 chist recently arrived in New York. The al- 
 leged anarchist stated that he had expected moral 
 help from the Americans, but was very much dis- 
 appointed; that in his estimation the morals of 
 the Americans were very low, and that he had 
 resolved to leave the country. 
 
 In answer to this she said that, after traveling 
 in the European countries, she came to the con- 
 clusion that the morals of the Americans were 
 much higher than those of the people of the 
 European countries, and that failure to derive 
 any moral assistance from the Americans must 
 have been due to his own fault. She further 
 advised him to change his conduct and disposi- 
 tion, to be cheerful, sociable, friendly towards 
 others, willing to see the bright side of every- 
 thing, to be generous and confiding, and not sus- 
 picious. 
 
 It is extremely improbable that a Russian anar- 
 chist came to this country at the time, and found 
 none better to complain to than a woman, or 
 that he wrote such a long letter in English, ac- 
 knowledging himself to be an anarchist, the most 
 
"My Name is Legion" 283 
 
 contemptible and abominable name in this coun- 
 try, if not in others. 
 
 She had applied to me all the abusive, insult- 
 ing, contemptuous and degrading names that were 
 to be found in her vocabulary, except the "anar- 
 chist." She had to devise some means to call 
 me by that name, and this is what she did. She 
 pretended to be an anarchist for a little while, 
 as she can change her color as readily as a chame- 
 leon. She becomes now a lover, now a liar — now 
 an anarchist, now a robber. She may have writ- 
 ten herself, or rather had someone else to write 
 it ; nor is it improbable that she made a few sug- 
 gestions as to the nature of the answer. 
 
 I had said of Mrs. E. W. Wilcox more than 
 once to W. D. Anthony and others that, in my 
 estimation, she was a good writer among her 
 sex, and that I always read her articles. 
 
 I had also said to Chas. Wolpert that if I were 
 to judge the morals of Americans from those of 
 the employees of Mr. Tapken, I could not help 
 but think that Americans had the lowest morals 
 among the nations I had known. 
 
 Now, Mrs. E. W. Wilcox, whom I consider to 
 be a good writer, says of Americans that they 
 have the highest morals among the nations, and 
 to me, though indirectly, that I have to associate 
 with Americans, be cheerful and confiding, in 
 order to get moral help from them, and also 
 raise my "low morals" to the same level with 
 those of Americans ; and that if I do not comply 
 with her advice, I should miss not merely the 
 moral help that is to come from the Americans, 
 
284 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 but incur a positive harm by being called an 
 anarchist. 
 
 She has not reformed yet, the ignorant, im- 
 moral, "hardened Benedict"; she is still trying 
 to scare me into submission, not knowing that 
 nothing in the world can scare me, that the 
 whole world were quite unable to shake me so 
 long as I consider myself to be in the right; and 
 yet a child could lead me if it only would show 
 my mistake. Submission without conviction of 
 error makes one a reluctant slave and hypocrite. 
 
 I still consider Mrs. E. W. Wilcox a good 
 writer; but this does not imply that I implicitly 
 acquiesce in all she says. I have not known yet 
 such an one in the world. Her answer to the 
 anarchist's letter consists of two parts : First, 
 that Americans have the highest morals in the 
 world; and second her advice to the anarchist 
 directly, and to the foreigners or perhaps to 
 everyone indirectly. I agree with her in neither 
 of them. 
 
 Had she known the five Americans with whom 
 I had been working, that they were teaching me 
 how to draw pictures very much like those to be 
 seen on the walls of some of the public lava- 
 tories, the use of profane language or obscene 
 talk, were trying to take me to the bawdy-houses, 
 etc., which are mentioned in this work more mi- 
 nutely, would she still advise me to be sociable, 
 confiding, not suspicious, in order to derive moral 
 help from them and raise my morals? That she 
 would not, is clear enough to everyone who has 
 common-sense. What she has above is a general 
 
"My Name is Legion" 285 
 
 rule, but it can never be applied indiscriminately 
 to all particular cases. 
 
 With respect to the first part of her answer^ 
 the comparison, evidently, is not made between 
 the higher class of Americans and the lower class 
 of Europeans, but taking only class for class. 
 Even in this case, to say that American philoso- 
 phers, moralists, authors, writers, have higher 
 morals than the same class of Europeans is to 
 speak nonsense. There is not an ethical treatise 
 that has any worth, and which is not translated 
 to all the European languages. They all acquire 
 their moral instructions from the same sources. 
 The highest class of the civilized nations, morally 
 considered, are at the same level. 
 
 I will pass over the next two classes, the 
 wealthy, who do not have to work for a living, 
 and those who are at some business on their own 
 account, the storekeepers; the first because they 
 are too busy with their automobiles, visits and 
 entertainments ; they do not care for morality as 
 much as for conventionality ; the second because 
 they are tied to their business daily from eight 
 A. M. to ten P. M. They have but one end in 
 view, to make money. The degree of the mor- 
 ality that may be predicated of these two classes 
 will still be found to be about the same when 
 compared with that of the same classes of Euro- 
 peans. 
 
 When comparison is made between the lowest 
 classes, American laborers will be found to make 
 the highest wages, and spend naturally the most. 
 But this is a case entirely unrelated to morality. 
 One reason why the American laborer earns 
 
286 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 higher wages, is because he works longer hours, 
 which means that he has less leisure, and this is 
 opposed to the cultivation of morality. He is apt 
 to become more like a machine rather than a 
 moral or moralized being. But another and more 
 obvious defect of the American is, as mentioned 
 before, his haughtiness. Of the seven countries, 
 which I have visited, America is the only one 
 where foreigners are called "damned," by those 
 who are themselves descended from foreigners. 
 
 It is said, now and then, of Americans that 
 they are more law-abiding than Europeans. This 
 is not true. This conclusion is not arrived at by 
 careful investigation and impartial judgment 
 based on reliable statistics. The extent of viola- 
 tions of law in a particular locality is found to 
 vary with the degree of effectiveness of the police 
 force in that locality. But supposing it to be 
 true, there still exists a wide gap between the 
 law-abiding and moralized man. The man who 
 obeys the positive laws but is indifferent to the 
 observance of the moral laws that are not speci- 
 fied and sanctioned by the government, is no 
 more moralized than the one who breaks them. 
 ISio morality can be predicated of the man who 
 refrains from perjury, but not from lying, any 
 more than of the lion or the tiger in the zoologi- 
 cal garden who obeys the keeper's order at the 
 sight of the iron bar. The former is brought to 
 obedience by the baton of the policeman, the 
 latter, by the iron bar of the keeper. Both are 
 scared to submission; the sense of right and 
 wrong is wanting in the one as well as in the 
 other. 
 
"My Name is Legion" 287 
 
 But what to say about the education of the 
 American. It is a world-wide notion that Ameri- 
 cans are better educated than the rest of the 
 world. It is said that from ninety-five to 
 ninety-seven per cent, of the Americans can read 
 and write. Education and morality at first glance 
 appear closely related. Not all kinds of knowl- 
 edge, however, have a direct relation to morality. 
 The study of arithmetics, grammar, geography, 
 and all the applied sciences, sharpens the intel- 
 lect; but it is of as much use to the honest man 
 for the proper management of his business as 
 to the rogue for successfully accomplishing his 
 criminal purpose. Instructions given at the pub- 
 lic schools are mainly of that kind which may 
 be called unmoral. They leave the morals of 
 the instructed unaffected. Before the morals of 
 the different nations can be compared with each 
 other, morality, based on the true principles, is 
 to be inculcated upon all, in order to have a uni- 
 form criterion to judge by. Inculcation of true 
 morality should be commenced as soon as the child 
 is capable of forming simple' abstract notions. 
 This has been neglected, because some codes of 
 moraUty are opposed to the dogmas of the ex- 
 isting religions, and the latter are the more 
 pleasing and easier to comply with, while men, 
 as a rule, lean towards what is agreeable and 
 shun what seems comfortless. 
 
 It is a first condition in primary as well as in 
 higher education to discuss freely of the funda- 
 mental problems of life, the nature of mind, its 
 faculties, its laws, the duties of man to society, 
 
288 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 and of society to man, the origin and the gov- 
 ernment of the world. 
 
 The following rules, derived from the order 
 of nature, is to be inculcated upon the mind 
 of the child, and later of the youth, not dogmat- 
 ically, but always by showing reasons for, refer- 
 ing to concrete examples to be met in every-day 
 Hfe. 
 
 Live by your own labor. 
 
 1. Nature does not provide man with the 
 necessities of life; he has to labor for it. Liv- 
 ing upon the labor of others, obtained, as alms, 
 charity, tip, by working less and getting more 
 in exchange, is robbery. Even inheritance has 
 the same demoralizing effect upon the heirs and 
 heiresses, unless such effect is guarded against 
 by special instructions and proper arrangement. 
 
 2. Strive to be happy, but not at the expense 
 of the happiness of others. Seek your gain, if 
 it does not entail a greater loss to others. Others' 
 right to life, happiness and gain is just as sacred 
 as yours. 
 
 3. Add to your stock of knowledge and share 
 it with society. You can never repay what you 
 have received from the society; but you ought 
 to contribute your mite to its progress. But 
 not so with your tangible products of labor, un- 
 less your loss will be counterbalanced hy a 
 greater moral gain to society or any member of 
 it. In such a case it is your duty tb give freely, 
 and honor, respect and thank him who receives 
 what you give, but never expect any respect, 
 honor or thanks from him in exchange. 
 
 4. Obey the call of duty. Refrain, under 
 
"My Name is Legion" 289 
 
 no circumstances, from commission of acts pro- 
 ductive of moral value, in respect to self or 
 others indiscriminately, as judged by the prin- 
 ciples of morality, and give preference to the 
 one having the most value over the rest. 
 
 Let deliberation intervene between impulse 
 and action. 
 
 1. Have some end in view, no matter what 
 you do. Let no impulse be realized in action, 
 unless it conduces to some worthy end. 
 
 2. Endeavor to cure and free yourself from 
 the influence of the emotions. They all are 
 species of human frailties, diseases. Do not let 
 pity, mercy, sympathy, benevolence, overrule 
 your reason and blind your judgment. Innumer- 
 able lives have been wrecked, immorality vastly 
 encouraged, and nature's divine purpose frus- 
 trated or protracted by acts committed from the 
 blind impulse of those emotions. 
 
 3. Do not marry for love; it is brutalizing. 
 This will be regarded little short of profanity 
 
 by those groping in darkness, ignorant of the 
 order of nature. It may draw indignation from 
 some men and all the women, just as a state- 
 ment that "the gods are exempt from sexual 
 love, and none of them has wife," would have 
 drawn a like indignation from the Greeks 
 twenty-five centuries ago. God is not liable to 
 be tossed by passion. Such a thought is un- 
 worthy of the perfection predicated of Him. The 
 next step will be the extension of the same view 
 with respect to the man who is subject to a mini- 
 mum degree of emotional excitement. 
 
 Indulgence in emotions is so much waste of 
 
290 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 power, is throwing away of energies. An intense 
 or passionate mutual love of husband and wife 
 disqualifies them for begetting of healthy chil- 
 dren. This should be so by a priorary considera- 
 tions, as it is proved to be so a posteriory, by con- 
 crete examples to be had from breeders of ani- 
 mals. 
 
 Marrying for love implies a certain impulse re- 
 alized in action without the intervention of delib- 
 eration ; nor has it a worthy end in view, precrea- 
 tion being considered as a by-product, which is 
 characteristic of the brutes. "You are in love." 
 "You behave like a brute." Likewise, "I married 
 for love," "I behaved like a brute," are equivalent 
 expressions. 
 
 Do I not please you, reader? "Go, then, to 
 the priests, and leave the philosophers in peace." 
 How do we discriminate the animal from the 
 man? By its actions, which immediately and 
 invariably follow the blind impulses. No moral 
 being can possibly fall in love without bringing 
 disgrace and reproach to his kind. To lay aside 
 reason, to ignore its mission and behave like a 
 brute, is an inexcusable defect in a man. 
 
 How ludicrous it is to hear a young man ex- 
 press his love to a woman by such phrases, 
 "You are the only woman whom I have loved. 
 I can never love anyone else." 
 
 The prevalence of polygamy and polyandry 
 among some nations and sects past or present, 
 the existence of the bawdy-houses everywhere, 
 and young men standing at street corners and 
 announcing the ajjproach of a "peach," and then 
 another, then a third and a fourth one, to each 
 
' "My Name Is Legion" 29 1 
 
 other within a short time, go to show that it is 
 a gross lie, only intended to please the woman 
 who invariably expects such confessions, and is 
 in perfect harmony with the requirements of the 
 custom of the country, although every one knows 
 it to be of recent invention, secreted by the 
 seething brains of a number of eccentric poets. 
 I can love thousands of girls in this city alone, 
 and all in an equal degree; from love, I could 
 marry all of them; from duty, one or none. 
 Therefore, 
 
 4. Marry from the duty of self-perpetuation, 
 which is a worthy end, enjoined upon you by 
 morality, assigtiing to love an insignificant place. 
 Even maternal and paternal affections are un- 
 necessary to parents who are sufficiently alive to 
 the reason of supporting the young. Marriage 
 implies self-sacrifice, for progeny; if it brings 
 any amount of pleasure or happiness as a by- 
 product, enjoy it; but to make pleasure or hap- 
 piness the end of matrimony is immoral, brutish. 
 
 Until these rules, which are only the a, b, c of 
 morality, are universalized and inculcated, esti- 
 mation and comparison of the morals of the 
 different nations will be as impossible as the 
 measuring of a gnat's wing with a yard-stick. 
 Actions, for the most part, are regulated by the 
 rule of expediency and not by the codes of mor- 
 ality. ^ 
 
 One of the boarders named Harry, who had 
 occupied the room next to mine, opened the door 
 of his room right after I did that of mine, as 
 if the iQcks gi the two doors were mechanically 
 
292 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 connected with one another, and came down to 
 breakfast right after me, following my steps. 
 He kept on doing this until I changed my room. 
 
 The librarian of the A Library began to 
 
 Scrutinize me from head to feet. I was sure I 
 had given him no reason for such behavior; it 
 must have come from some external source. I 
 naturally blamed the Intellectually-higher-than- 
 man Woman for it. One morning, just after the 
 library was opened, I went in. and while walk- 
 ing towards the section where the reference books 
 are kept, he met me, coming towards me. On 
 seeing me, he turned back, and, following me, 
 stood opposite to me for fully two minutes, hiss- 
 ing, and "Uhum ! Uhum !" clearing his throat. 
 Then he went away. 
 
 Saturday Huntington gave me his paper, point- 
 ing with his finger at a short paragraph, which 
 read something as follows: "Jennie" (the reader 
 must remember that this is the name of the In- 
 tellectually-higher-than-man Woman's daughter) 
 "says she is so afraid of the monster lest he 
 should murder her, because he is very fond of 
 money." This was all, consisting of but three 
 lines, standing by itself, and having no connec- 
 tion whatever with the subject of the article, 
 which was about the case of a woman who, 
 having lured over eighteen men and women to 
 her house, situated in a farm, had robbed and 
 murdered them, and when her crimes were dis- 
 covered by the authorities, set the house on fire. 
 
 So this was a message to me from her, to the 
 effect that she was afraid of me, the monster. 
 
"My Name is Legion" 293 
 
 lest I should murder her, because I was very 
 fond of money. 
 
 The next morning, at breakfast, Hutton led the 
 conversation to murder and murderers of all 
 kinds, which had been his favorite subject for 
 the last three weeks. "How strange it is," he 
 said, "that there are men who have nerve 
 enough to commit murder. Oh, I can never do 
 that; I can never raise my hand to take the life 
 of a man ! I hate even the thought of it ; but 
 then it is so easy to hire a tramp at the Bowery 
 for five or six dollars, and have him commit 
 the murder." 
 
 I thought that things could not be left as they 
 were; something was to be done to dispel her 
 fears and restore peace in the boarding house. 
 I could think of no better way than applying 
 to a detective agency, which I did the next day. 
 I told the detective how I was treated at the 
 boarding house, and of the suspicious or scru- 
 tinizing looks of the librarian, and asked him if 
 anything could be done to stop them. 
 
 "It is absolutely necessary," he said, "that 
 you should tell me all the circumstances. Do you 
 know anything that could have given occasion 
 to such behavior on the part of the men you 
 complain of?" 
 
 Then I told him all that had happened to me, 
 in an abridged way, during the past three years 
 and a half. 
 
 He made a memorandum of it, and said that 
 he was sure to find out everything, and even have 
 some of them arrested within twenty-four hours. 
 I left him with the understanding that he would 
 
294 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 see Hutton on the same day, and the librarian 
 on the following day. 
 
 The same evening Hutton came home very 
 much disturbed. "I wish," he said, "John" (the 
 waiter) "would put me at some other table." He 
 did not like to sit with me at the same table any 
 more. So everything tended to show ■ that the 
 detective had seen him. 
 
 The next day, at the hour appointed, I went to 
 see the detective. 
 
 "Good morning, Mr. Baron," he said, as soon 
 as he saw me, with a smiling and happy expres- 
 sion, and shook my hand with apparent cordial- 
 ity. He did not seem to have completed the full 
 course of the school of Judas Iscariot; he neg- 
 lected the act of osculation. "I could not see 
 him yesterday, but I can to-day," he went on. 
 "Let us go to see the librarian; I shall be ready 
 in five minutes." He gave me a chair and 
 went out. 
 
 "I am ready now," he said, after about five 
 minutes; "let us go." 
 
 "You do not mean to say that we shall go to- 
 gether, do you?" I asked. 
 
 "No," he said; "you go first; that is right," 
 he added. "Someone belonging to the other 
 party might see us together; that won't do, of 
 course." 
 
 So I went to the library first, and, taking a 
 call slip, I wrote on it, "B. Jowet, Dialogues of 
 Plato, Vol. IV," and, signing my name to it, 
 handed it to one of the attendants, who gave me 
 the book without keeping me waiting, because it 
 had been reserved for me from the previous day. 
 
"My Name is Legion" 295 
 
 I took a seat at the table nearest the entrance. 
 After about fifteen minutes the detective came in 
 and took a seat at the same table, i. httle above 
 and opposite to me. After a while I noticed he 
 had gone. 
 
 About five o'clock in the evening the lady who 
 conducted the boarding house told me that a 
 gentleman had inquired about me. From the 
 description she gave, I inferred that it must have 
 been tiie detective, whereupon I went to see him, 
 in order to find out if he had anything to inform, 
 or inquire of me. He was talking to someone 
 in his private office. After a few minutes the 
 man left him. Then he called me in and gave 
 me a chair. 
 
 "Now," he began, "you cannot find any fault 
 with a detective like me ; I have your signature." 
 
 He took out the call slip which I had signed 
 in the morning to get the "Dialogues of Plato," 
 but he did not show me the whole of it. He 
 folded it up so as to expose my signature. "Is 
 this your signature?" he asked. 
 
 "Yes," I said. 
 
 "Well," he went on, "we soon got acquainted 
 with each other. We had a few minutes' friendly 
 chat, and he offered me a cigar. When I asked 
 him for your signature, he did not refuse, al- 
 ■ though he showed some reluctance by telling me 
 that they were not supposed to do that. Now," 
 he added, "the law requires that I should keep 
 your signature." 
 
 "Poor devil!" I thought. "She is still after 
 my handwriting. Did she not already have 
 enough of it? I wonder what makes her think 
 
296 . The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 that 1 could be scared by my handwriting or 
 signature. She can have at least one slip bear- 
 ing my signature every day. She has been 
 treating my as an ignorant and whimsical mother 
 treats her five-year-old child." 
 
 "I don't care; you can keep it," I said to him. 
 "But what did you learn from them?" 
 
 "I said to the librarian that you were a mar- 
 ried man," he said, "and also that you were all 
 right, but only that you would not work, expect- 
 ing to be supported by your mother-in-law, who 
 was very rich." 
 
 "The voice is indeed the voice of Jacob; but 
 the hands are the hands of Esau." My eyes saw 
 the detective, but my ears heard the Intellec- 
 tually-higher-than-man Woman. By this time I 
 knew her ways, which are those of the average 
 woman, too well to mistake her. 
 
 First of all she had the following phrase put 
 in the paper, "What to say of the 'scamp' who 
 forces the girl to propose." How could I prove 
 that I was not a scamp? Simply by taking the 
 lead and proposing to her. Next, that people 
 would take me for a woman-hater, or one de- 
 scended from parents addicted to drink, and ex- 
 pected that I would prove myself to be otherwise 
 by showing more interest in women, by "going to 
 church to see the girls," by telling of women 
 that "without them this life would not be worth 
 living." Then they said of me that "I would if 
 I could, but I could notj because I was a mar- 
 ried man" ; and in order to prove that I was not 
 a married man, I "had to take girls out." Next 
 I was considered one having no manhood, and to 
 
"My Name is Legion" 297 
 
 show that they were wrong I was expected to 
 marry. Next Mr. and Mrs. Arlington pretended 
 to run away with the forty-four dollars of Miss 
 Hall's money, which means that all the criminals 
 run away. In the meanwhile I was called the 
 leader of a gang of blackmailers, and threatened 
 with arrest. In order to prove that I was not a 
 criminal, like Mr. and Mrs. Arlington, I had to 
 
 stay in N . Then again, I was threatened to 
 
 be called an anarchist if I did not associate with 
 Americans, of whom Mrs. Ella Wheeler Wil- 
 cox said that they had the highest morals among 
 the nations ; also Jennie, her daughter, was afraid 
 of me — the monster — lest I should murder her. 
 Now, if I do not work, people will say that I 
 expected to be supported by my mother-in-law; 
 and in order to prove the contrary to be true, I 
 had to work. 
 
 My moral sentiments are not an adoption of 
 the public wish, nor my duty the contents of 
 its expectation from me. The praise or blame 
 of my fellows can never be my guide. I have an 
 inner yet universal touchstone, by which to judge 
 my actions. The scorn of fools and of the vul- 
 gar herd does not disturb me. 
 
 But it is a great crime to take people for 
 scamps, woman-haters, drunkards, blackmailers, 
 and what not; and demand of them to prove 
 that they are not so, instead of considering every 
 human being to be just, honest and reliable, un- 
 til he is caught in an offense committed deliber- 
 ately, and afterwards showing no sense of guilt 
 or compunction. It is applying the axe to the 
 root of the society. And this had been her ways 
 
298 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 with respect to me for about four years ; nor was 
 it yet ended. 
 
 "And when I asked him," he went on, "if he 
 knew anything about you, he said that he did not. 
 He asked the lady at the desk, who said that 
 you were all right, that she had seen you at 
 the library for about a year, either reading or 
 writing all the while. So you see all spoke 
 well of you, and don't seem to know anything 
 else." 
 
 "What about his scrutinizing looks at me?" 
 I asked him. 
 
 "I suppose," he said, "he does that to every- 
 body, because it is his duty to watch them all, 
 and see that no books are stolen from the 
 library." 
 
 Now, in the first pace, it is not his duty, as 
 there is a man near the door exclusively for that 
 purpose — ^namely, to check umbrellas, overcoats, 
 parcels, and examine everything that goes out of 
 the library. 
 
 If I were under suspicion as one who steals 
 books from libraries, why not watch me in secret, 
 and catch me in the very act unawares ? Instead, 
 he takes great pains to make me know that I 
 am watched. 
 
 It is absurd to think that at nine o'clock in 
 the morning, right after the opening of the 
 library, I was going to steal one of the massive 
 volumes of the encyclopaedias and go out un- 
 noticed at the door. 
 
 "Well, what about Hutton?" I asked him. 
 
 "I went first to the boarding house," he said. 
 "I had to go there, because if Hutton asked me 
 
"My Name is Legion" 299 
 
 how I found out that he knew you, I had no 
 answer to give. I inquired about you of the 
 lady at the house, who expressed her good 
 opinion of you, that you were very quiet and 
 clean. In this way I pretended to learn from 
 her that you and Hutton dined at the same table ; 
 after this I went to see him. Now, let me see," 
 he went on; "what is the He that I told him. I 
 tell half a dozen lies in five minutes. Oh, yes, I 
 remember now. I said that you would go into 
 the liquor business; that you made an applica- 
 tion for a license, and that he was mentioned 
 as one of the references. So I asked him of 
 your financial standing, your habits, whether you 
 stayed out late at nights or not, how you dressed 
 yourself. And he said that you did not stay 
 out late in the evenings, that you were not ex- 
 travagant, one who spends his money or rather 
 wastes it for pleasure or unnecessary amuse- 
 ments, that you were very quiet, and so forth ; so 
 you see they all have good opinions of you." 
 
 Now, this is the third time he emphasized the 
 circumstance that people think good of me. How 
 disgusting it is to be told directly, and in plain 
 words, of others' good opinion about one's self. 
 But when such a declaration comes from a per- 
 son who had only a short time ago called the very 
 same one a blackmailer, the disgust is indescrib- 
 able. 
 
 Most women, if not all, regulate their conduct 
 so as to win the good opinion of others, regard- 
 less of the goodness or badness of the conduct 
 pursued. They take great pains to draw glances 
 of admiration, and hear words of flattery and 
 
300 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 praise from even the most worthless cad whom 
 they heartily despise. Nor are a good many men 
 exempt from this vanity. Their conscience is 
 the pleased or displeased mood of those who 
 come in contact with them. Like a reed they 
 yield to the mildest zephyr, instead of raising 
 themselves above the common herd, and stand- 
 ing erect and undisturbed like an oak against 
 the strongest wind. To be thought good of is, 
 for them, the most desirable thing in the world; 
 as if the good opinion of others were a reliable 
 touchstone by which to test true goodness. The 
 martyrs of the world, to whom the greatest share 
 of the progress is due, were despised by all. Not 
 until people shall know what good is, can good- 
 ness be justly ascribed to him who really is good. 
 
 "Now," he went on, "when you go home he 
 will ask you if you are going into liquor busi- 
 ness, and what you told me about those people 
 must be all imagination." 
 
 "No one," I said, "can imagine such things 
 and yet be of a sane mind ; you might just as well 
 tell me I am crazy." 
 
 "If you rent a room in the boarding house 
 for a man whom you know, he will find out 
 everything within a week or two." 
 
 "I will think of it," I said. 
 
 After making a few questions about our coun- 
 try, he said: "Do you intend to go back to your 
 own country?" 
 
 "No," I said; "I am going to stay in this 
 country." 
 
 "Then you are going to look for a position, 
 are you?" he asked me. 
 
"My Name is Legion" 301 
 
 "I am not going to do that, but study Eng- 
 lish," I said, "and then write a book." 
 
 I said this to him, expecting that he would 
 tell her about it, so as not to disturb me until 
 I was ready. 
 
 "Did you hear of the thirty anarchists com- 
 ing to this country from Russia?" he asked me. 
 
 "No," I said; "I heard nothing of the kind; 
 who told you of it?" 
 
 "Why, it was in the paper," he said. 
 
 I suppose in "The Better Part of Truth," 
 edited by the Intellectually-higher-than-man Wo- 
 man. I wonder if anyone else heard or read of 
 thirty anarchists coming to this country in May, 
 1908? Anarchists of straw. She imagines wild 
 and fantastic things, and I have to suffer for it. 
 I left him and went out. 
 
 The following evening Hutton asked me if it 
 were true that I intended to go into the liquor 
 business. 
 
 "No," I said to him, "I am not going into the 
 liquor business ; but if I ever make up my mind 
 to go into a business, I shall consider that one 
 also." 
 
 "Someone told me that you applied for a 
 license," he said, "and he wanted to know if I 
 could tell what kind of a man you were. I 
 told him that you were all right, that you were 
 not extravagant, that you did not stay out late 
 at nights. But I wonder who told him that I 
 knew you?" 
 
 "The lady of the house must have told him," 
 I said. 
 
 "No," he said; "sh§ gays she did not, I have 
 
302 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 been trying to find out who it was, but so far I 
 have failed to do so." 
 
 "Well, keep on trying," I said; "if you think 
 it very important, do not give it up; you may 
 succeed yet." 
 
 The next day, while some of us were sitting 
 in the parlor, they began to talk about bad 
 money. One of them said that he had once a 
 counterfeit English half-sovereign; another one 
 described the way a friend of his had passed a 
 spurious English pound, until supper was an- 
 nounced. 
 
 The librarian began with renewed activity to 
 walk round the table where I had my seat in 
 the library, hissing and "Uhum ! Uhum !" clear- 
 ing his throat, for about two weeks, very much 
 like gnats flying round a jet of flame; then he 
 gave it up altogether, being assured, I suppose, 
 that I was not going to steal any more books 
 from the library. 
 
 About four weeks previously to this a girl had 
 come to the boarding house, a good pianist and 
 singer. She had tried hard to engage my at- 
 tention, but having failed to do so, had left us, 
 and now six more girls came to the boarding 
 house within a week. Four of them could play 
 the piano. (I am very fond of music, and she 
 well knew it.) They all seemed very anxious to 
 see me and speak to me. She also had a girl 
 or more in every library I went into, who pre- 
 tended to take great interest in me; but I paid 
 no attention to them; nor would anyone else 
 under the circumstance. Besides women, she had 
 young men of different nationalities, who sat be- 
 
"My Name Is Legion" 303 
 
 side me in the library, read the same book I 
 read, went out to dinner, and came in with me. 
 If she expected that I would contract friendship 
 with them, it was an absurd expectation never 
 to be realized, because a library is not a place 
 to make friends; if to provoke me, she was be- 
 having foolishly. Probably she meant both, as 
 she never undertakes to do anything having but 
 one end in view. As soon as she fails of her 
 first end, she aims at another, and then a third 
 and a fourth one, often opposed to one another. 
 
 One day a tramp at the Union Square Park, 
 without any apparent reason or provocation, be- 
 gan to "cuss" and swear at me. I told him to 
 shut up and keep away from me. I was not 
 afraid of him, because I was much stronger than 
 he, and he could do no harm to me. But soon 
 another one came to his help. Whereupon I moved 
 uptown, in the hope of seeing a policeman. I 
 went as far as De Young's photograph gallery, 
 but none was to be seen. Then I turned towards 
 Fourteenth Street ; they followed me all the way, 
 swearing at me, and telling me that I was a 
 foreigner, that I had no business in this coun- 
 try, and that I had better get out of the country 
 before they smashed my jaws. They left me at 
 about the corner of Thirteenth Street, when a 
 policeman came in view. I said nothing of it 
 to the policeman, as I had no witness with me. 
 Many people heard them "cussing" me, but they 
 passed by and went their way. 
 
 So she hired "Bowery tramps," not quite to 
 murder me, but only to scare and drive me out 
 of the country. This she had failed to do by 
 
304 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 keeping my handwriting and signature. Two 
 days later he met me again. "Will you buy me 
 a sandwich, please?" he said. 
 
 "You are looking for trouble," I said, and 
 walked away. He did not swear nor say a word, 
 because he was not paid this time. I met him 
 many a time in the same park, but he had nothing 
 to say. 
 
 One afternoon, while reading in the library, a 
 young man took the seat next to mine. He looked 
 as if waiting for someone, having neither book 
 nor paper to read. After about half an hour he 
 gave his seat to a middle-aged man, who was 
 charged with some disagreeable odor. He took 
 a magazine and commenced to read, but now 
 and then he would lift up his head and scrutinize 
 me. In the evening, at supper time, Hutton and 
 Huntington began to talk about the insane asy- 
 lum at Ward's Island, also about insanity and 
 the symptoms of it. Some of them, they said, 
 shun society, do not speak a word, as if they 
 were deaf or dumb and that sometimes it was 
 impossible for an ordinary man to distinguish 
 an insane man from a sane one; but an alienist 
 could tell at a glance ; and that often people who 
 considered themselves sane and were regarded 
 to be so, were taken by surprise when they were 
 declared to be insane by a specialist, and found 
 themselves confined in an asylum. 
 
 This conversation naturally made me think that 
 the man who scrutinized me in the library was 
 either an alienist, or, which is more likely, pre- 
 tended to be one, and now Hutton and Hunting- 
 ton were trying to frighten me by th6 thought 
 
"My Name is Legion" 305 
 
 that I might be pronounced insane, unless I asso- 
 ciated with them, the girls and others. After 
 the talk about the passing of the counterfeit coins, 
 I had almost stopped going to the parlor alto- 
 gether, not even when the girls were singing 
 or playing the piano. Whereupon they tried to 
 compel me to go to the parlor in the following 
 way. 
 
 Supper was usually served at half-past six. 
 The waiter rang the bell so hard as to be heard 
 at a distance of two or three blocks. For a few 
 days he rang the bell at exactly six o'clock, and 
 then for a few days at seven. One evening I 
 waited until seven-fifteen, and not hearing the 
 bell ring, I went down to the dining room and 
 asked the waiter if the supper was not ready. 
 "The supper was served at six o'clock," he said. 
 From that day on, if I went down at six o'clock, 
 the supper would not be ready, so I had to sit 
 with the rest in the parlor, and if I waited in 
 my room until after six o'clock, supper would 
 have been served at six, without ringing the 
 bell, and, in consequence, I could only get some 
 cold, or a very scanty, supper. In the mean- 
 while, every day, in the afternoon, when I came 
 to my room, the soap would be found on the 
 floor, the towel thrown into one corner, the um- 
 brella lying on the floor; everything upset, done 
 by a negro servant. I thought that my condition 
 had become once more unbearable, and that I 
 had to move. 
 
 One evening, after supper, while taking a walk, 
 I met Marshall, a friend of mine, at about Thir- 
 tieth Street and Broadway. He asked me if I 
 
3o6 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 would mind going with him to a Martian cafe to 
 have a Httle talk. He said he went there al- 
 most every day to have a smoke. We went there, 
 and when we were talking, the man who con- 
 ducted the cafe asked me where I was living. 
 
 "In an American boarding house," I said. 
 
 "I have a nice front room," he said. "I will 
 let you have it for a very reasonable price; you 
 can take your meals in a Martian restaurant a 
 la carte.. That is, what you like, and not what 
 you are given; which is the case in most of the 
 boarding houses." 
 
 "I will consider your proposition," I said to 
 him, "and let you know in time." 
 
 When we went out of the cafe I asked my 
 friend if he knew him, if he had any children. 
 
 "I know he has no children," he said, "but I 
 cannot tell you what kind of a man he is. If you 
 intend to make a change, come to my house and 
 make yourself at home as you never did before. 
 You will not take me for a stranger. We have 
 known each other for this twenty years." 
 
 "But your house is so far from the library," 
 I said. He was living at Fox Street, in the 
 Bronx. 
 
 "Take the subway, just as I do," he said. 
 "That will take only half an hour." 
 
 After all, I consented to move to his house. 
 
 Sunday was my last day at the boarding house. 
 The topic of the talk at dinner time was about a 
 wealthy young lady, who, they said, was going 
 to marry a poor but respectable and industrious 
 young man, contrasting her wealth with his pov- 
 erty and good qualities ; but no mention was made 
 
"My Name is Legion" 307 
 
 of her character and disposition, as if the amount 
 of the fortune were the measure of the worth 
 of the individual. 
 
 "But," said Hutton, "his father has been dis- 
 covered to be a horse thief" (luckily he was not 
 a counterfeiter), "and got arrested at a time he 
 never suspected. Criminals, as a rule, are ar- 
 r«sted when they think they are safe." 
 
 After dinner, while I was in my room and the 
 door closed, I could hear two or three of them 
 talking and laughing near the door, and occa- 
 sionally pulling the trigger of a revolver. So the 
 coward adds now something else — firearms — to 
 my handwriting and the hired tramps, in order 
 to scare me. I am as much afraid of dying as 
 she is of lying. 
 
 "Come, lovely and soothing death, 
 
 Undulate round the world, serenely arriving, arriving. 
 
 In the day, in the night, to all, to each. 
 
 Sooner or later delicate death. 
 
 "Dark mother, always gliding near with soft feet. 
 Have none chanted for thee a chant of fullest wel- 
 come? 
 Then I chant it for thee, I glorify thee above all, 
 I bring thee a new song, that when thou must indeed 
 come, come unfalteringly. 
 
 "Approach, strong deliveress, 
 
 When it is so, when thou hast taken them, I joyously 
 
 sing the dead; 
 Lost in the loving floating ocean of thee, 
 Laved in the flood of thy bliss, O death!" 
 
 Monday I went to Marshall's house to live with 
 them. On Wednesday— that is, only two days 
 
3o8 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 after my removal to his house — I was left out 
 of the house for three hours, waiting for Mrs. 
 Marshall to come home. She had the key of the 
 house, and had gone down town apparently for 
 a visit. She came back at half-past seven, and 
 hurriedly prepared the supper, which consisted 
 entirely of what was left of the previous day's 
 supper. After supper Marshall told me that 
 his wife thought she would not be able to do 
 the cooking, as she did not feel well, and that 
 I had better look for a room or boarding house 
 the following day. He did not give me even a 
 week's notice. I took only two meals with them 
 — ^breakfast, which consisted entirely of fried 
 eggs and a cup of coffee, and supper. Luckily I 
 found a room the next day, at East Twenty-fifth 
 Street, between Lexington and Fourth Avenues, 
 a good and very quiet neighborhood. Friday I 
 moved to my new room. Monday I went to their 
 house to bring my grip over. The house was all 
 in disorder. Mrs. Marshall had been sickj they 
 had sent for the doctor. Her mother had come 
 to do the house work for her. She was afraid; 
 she wanted to go down town, to live among the 
 Martians. Mr. Marshall told me that he never 
 felt so bad in all his life; that he was afraid 
 lest his wife should die; in which case there was 
 no one to take care of his children, and he was 
 determined not to re-marry. Within a week they 
 rented a flat in an apartment house at East 
 Twenty-seventh Street, and moved there. 
 
 Who is to be held accountable for all this 
 trouble ? The Intellectually-higher-than-man 
 Woman. 
 
"My Name is Legion" 309 
 
 I commenced to take my meals in a Martian 
 restaurant at East Twenty-sixth Street; dinner 
 at eleven-fifteen A. M., and supper at five-fifteen 
 P. M., at a time when the dining room was al- 
 most vacant. Tuesday I went to the restaurant 
 to get my dinner. As soon as I sat down at the 
 table, a Martian, unknown to me, walked in and 
 sat right opposite to me, arid gave the very same 
 order that I did. It was impossible not to feel 
 her aggressive and unwelcome presence. From 
 that day on he would come to the restaurant and 
 hang around while I was taking my meals. For 
 about three weeks every Martian who knew me 
 or got acquainted with me at the time, asked me 
 if I were at work or not, where I had learned to 
 be a writer, how long I had been in the business, 
 if I had any other trade, and the reason for giv- 
 ing it up, and how much money I had made. 
 
 One morning, while waiting for the library to 
 open, being a little early, a young German ac- 
 costed me. "Good morning," said he. "Do you 
 like so much reading that you come so early ?" 
 "Yes," I said ; "I like to read once in a while." 
 "But I don't see you in the afternoons." 
 "I do a little writing in my room." 
 "You got a printing press ?" 
 "No, just a typewriting machine." 
 "But if you buy a printing press, you can pub- 
 lish your own writings, and I give you some job, 
 too. I wrote a book; it is at home; I've got no 
 money, and the publishers won't publish it with- 
 out money." He could hardly withhold his sin- 
 ister smile. 
 For three successive days he met me and said 
 
3IO The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 "Good morning." I paid no attention to him, 
 and so he stopped it. 
 
 One day, while taking my dinner, three or four 
 Martians all sitting together at the same table 
 began to discuss the meaning of the name Baron 
 (my name). After mentioning about half a 
 dozen absurd meanings, they came to the con- 
 clusion that the most popular meaning of Baron 
 was "ass." 
 
 If she had as much sense as an ass has, and 
 let people alone as all the asses do, she would 
 be well off. 
 
 I soon stopped going there. I began to take 
 my breakfast and supper in my own room, and 
 dinner in restaurants. But wherever I went, she 
 sent a tramp to sit opposite to me at the same 
 table, and order the very same rneals I did. 
 
 About the end of the month of August I began 
 to take a daily walk in the evenings over to the 
 recreation building at the foot of East Twenty- 
 fourth Street. On the first day of September a 
 young tramp, approaching me, said, "What is 
 the time?" 
 
 "Half-past five," I said. 
 
 "Wouldn't you like to have a job in the Float- 
 ing Hospital?" he asked. 
 
 "I prefer the soHd ground to work on," I 
 said. 
 
 "I got a furnished room," he said, "between 
 First and Second Avenues ; I pay only one dol- 
 lar and a half a week, and can take girls to my 
 room. Wouldn't you like to have such a room?" 
 
 "I like a quiet room the best," I said. 
 
 "But then you see," he said, "some women 
 
"My Name is Legion" 311 
 
 will not let you bring girls into your room ; they 
 want to come themselves." 
 
 This was enough for me. I left him there 
 and went to the upper end of the building. 
 After a while when I turned back I saw him 
 sitting on a bench. He asked me to sit down 
 beside him, but I refused. After two days he 
 met me there again. I pretended not to know 
 him. 
 
 About six months previously to this, that is, 
 in the month of March, while taking my din- 
 ner at a restaurant in the Bowery, two young 
 Jews came and sat at the same table with me, al- 
 though the dining room was all vacant. 
 
 "I am not going to marry," said one of them, 
 "there are so many girls; I can have the one 
 I like, and when I get tired of her, someone 
 else." 
 
 "Certainly not," said the other one. "Be- 
 sides, to support a wife costs much more money 
 than having several girls. You don't have to 
 pay for their room., board, dress, as you are 
 compelled to pay for your wife." 
 
 "You can drop a girl," said the first one, 
 "when she gets old, and have a young one; her 
 sickness does not bother you." 
 
 They kept up the conversation, speaking al- 
 ternately in English and Hebrew, until I got 
 through with my dinner and went out. 
 
 Evidently she expected of me to ask them 
 where and how I could get a girl or girls ; she 
 failed ; and now she sends a tramp to tell me 
 where T could get a room for only one dollar 
 and a half per week and take girls into my 
 
312 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 room. I paid no attention. So she failed again. 
 The next step was to send street women to the 
 house where I was rooming; and so she did. 
 The first one came about the middle of Novem- 
 ber, who occupied the room underneath mine and 
 next to the bathroom. At the end of the week 
 she went away, and a second one came. She 
 stayed for six weeks ; then a third, next a fourth, 
 and then a fifth one came. Everyone of them 
 exhausted her ingenuity in order to get me into 
 her room. I have always been regular in my 
 daily work and habits. I do each one at a cer- 
 tain time in the day; retiring, getting up, walk- 
 ing, bath, meals, study, etc., succeed one the 
 other at a regular order. Whenever they heard 
 my footsteps they rushed to the bathroom. 
 I bought a pair of carpet-sole slippers, so 
 as to be able; to go to the bathroom un- 
 heard; and when in the bathroom they 
 tried to open the door. It became impos- 
 sible for me to take bath regularly. They turned 
 on the hot water and let it run out. I had to 
 change the day and hour of my bath. Some- 
 times they let the door of their room open, upon 
 my approach, banged hurriedly and locked, it ; at 
 other time met me with a smiling expression at 
 the passage-way close to their room and the 
 door wide open. They never spoke to me ex- 
 cept the second one, who one Saturday afternoon 
 called me into her room, having the door of 
 her room half open, and her head thrust out 
 through the opening. I passed by paying no 
 attention to her. But none of them ever came 
 near my room. 
 
"My Name is Legion" 313 
 
 A young couple had occupied the room op- 
 posite to mine on the third floor. They began to 
 make noise about three o'clock in the morning 
 daily, by going out, coming in, opening 
 and closing their trunk, which they had 
 outside of their room. It was impossible for 
 me to sleep. I began to get up at the same hour, 
 light the gas and read. After about two weekg 
 they left the house, but the habit thus made was 
 enough to keep me awake. The same room was 
 occupied and vacated several times by different 
 sleep-disturbers at different hours in the night, 
 until the second week of December when the 
 room was occupied by a number of tramps, 
 hard to tell how many. They disturbed my 
 sleep almost any hour in the night. There was, 
 all the time, someone going out or coming in. 
 I kept my book near my pillow and the light 
 lowered. Whenever I was awakened by their 
 footsteps, knocking at the door, or their voice 
 calling to those inside the room. "Open 
 the door, will you, don't you hear me? 
 Come on, come on," etc. I turned my light on 
 and began to read until my eyes closed and the 
 book fell from my hand. This did not last very 
 long; someone else came and repeated the same 
 thing. This was kept up for three weeks. I 
 suppose they were afraid lest I slept in the after- 
 noons, because two or three of them stayed in 
 the room and made enough noise so as not to let 
 me sleep in the day time. 
 
 I could not complain of my situation, as I had 
 been warned of it beforehand. I was to be tor- 
 tured to death : "Woman's characteristic way of 
 
314 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 murdering her victim." She was on the right 
 track. 
 
 When they left the room I asked the house- 
 keeper about the number of the occupants of the 
 room. 
 
 "Two young men rented the room," she said, 
 "but God knows how many they were ; not less 
 than half a dozen. The two men who room on 
 the second floor complained of them for being too 
 noisy, so I sent them away." 
 
 The two men on the second floor left their 
 room which was immediately rented by a woman 
 who pretended to be very wealthy. 
 
 There are only two rooms on the second floor ; 
 one each side of the bathroom. Both of them 
 were occupied by women in order to seduce me 
 into their room. And the room on the third 
 floor, by tramps to disturb my sleep. For the 
 next fifteen months I hardly had fifteen nights 
 during which my sleep was not disturbed. 
 
 I had invested two hundred dollars in the 
 American Exploration Company, which is my 
 first and only investment. I held two one- 
 hundred-dollar bonds. I received the following 
 letter from the general manager at Paris : 
 
 "Dear Sir : Kindly let me know how many of 
 our bonds you hold carrying a bonus of Eclipse 
 common shares, also the number of each of the 
 bonds as well as the date of the same, and the 
 number of the coupons attached to them; also 
 the price you paid for same, and oblige. 
 
 (Signed) "W. Gammon, 
 
 "General Manager." 
 
"My Name is Legion" 315 
 
 I wrote a letter to him containing all the in- 
 formation desired; whereupon I received a 
 second letter as follow: 
 
 "Dear Sir: I have your esteemed favor of 
 the twenty-ninth ult., and thank you most 
 heartily for your promptness and kindness in 
 responding to my inquiries. The matter as ar- 
 ranged with you is perfectly in order, and is 
 exactly the way it was represented to me by Mr. 
 Walker (the New York agent). If you will 
 send me your October, 1907, and January, 1908, 
 coupons direct to me here we will remit to you 
 the seven dollars due on same without expense 
 to you. 
 
 "I think the more you look into the system, as 
 we have it now, of guaranteeing an investor 
 against loss by our bonds and giving him a fair 
 income on his money while he is waiting for the 
 mine to be developed and equipped, giving him 
 the shares absolutely free, which shares may 
 give an exceedingly large profit, is a plan, which 
 can but commend itself to you. 
 , "You will be pleased to hear that our new 
 mill is now at work crushing ore; the com- 
 pressor and air-drills started on the first instant, 
 the rock breaker on the seventh of February, 
 and the stamps commenced crushing on the tenth 
 instant. I feel confident that in time you will 
 be greatly pleased with our business and our 
 financial system, and the results it will bring and 
 trust eventually to have you co-operate with us 
 in many of our future enterprises. 
 
 "Thanking you for you co-operation and 
 
3i6 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 assistance in the past, and trusting that we may 
 have your heartiest support and co-operation in 
 the future, I am, with kind wishes, 
 "Yours cordially, 
 
 ' "W. Gammon, 
 "General Manager." 
 
 I sent to him a letter enclosing the coupons 
 in it. Two months passed but no answer came. 
 This naturally reminded me of the Intellectually- 
 higher-than-man Woman, who had repeatedly 
 tried to rob me of all my savings by inducing 
 me to invest them, and had failed. W. D. 
 Anthony was the only one to whom I had spoken 
 of my investment. Could it be that Anthony 
 told her of it, and she wrote to the company not 
 to consider my letters any more? I made an 
 attempt to find out if it was so. 
 
 I wrote a letter to the vice-president in San 
 Francisco, Gal., where the head office of the 
 company is, stating my failure to receive an 
 answer to my letter sent to Mr. Gammon over 
 two months ago, if he could account for the 
 delay. 
 
 After five weeks I received the following 
 answer : 
 
 "Dear Sir: I have delayed answering your 
 favor of September tenth, hoping to hear from 
 Mr. C. W. Gammon on the subject of the bonds 
 held in America, but as I have not heard from 
 him yet on this subject, I am writing him par- 
 ticularly about your case. 
 
 "I do not understand why you have not heard 
 
"My Name is Legion" 317 
 
 from him, unless either your letter to him, or his 
 reply, has gone astray. 
 
 "I am sending him a copy of your letter to 
 this office and have requested him to take the 
 matter up with you as soon as possible. We 
 cannot do anything about it from this end, see- 
 ing that the coupons in question have been sent 
 to Mr. Gammon. 
 
 "Should we receive any instructions on the 
 matter from Mr. Gammon, we shall be very 
 glad to take the matter up with you immediately 
 thereafter. 
 
 "As active work (development), has not been 
 started at the mine, we regret to say that we 
 cannot report any recent progress. Delays in 
 the closing of several big deals, due principally 
 to the scare caused by the panic of last year, 
 will explain the lack of progress. 
 "Yours very truly, 
 
 "P. C. TURMAN, 
 
 "Vice-president American Exploration Co." 
 
 My attention was immediately drawn to the 
 circumstance that the two accounts concerning 
 the development of the mine were opposed to 
 each other. MV. Gammon, who wrote his letter 
 several months before Mr. Turman and had not 
 received her letter yet, said that active work was 
 begun at the mine, while the latter writes, at her 
 instigation, that it is not started yet. 
 
 I immediately wrote a second letter to Mr. 
 Gammon, which contained a duplicate of the 
 letter which has not been answered, and a copy 
 of the one from Mr. Turman, adding also that 
 
3i8 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 a wealthy woman, on account of some matri- 
 monial disappointment, had been maliciously 
 uttering slanderous reports about me. If to 
 such false reports was due his silence, to kindly 
 let me know, as by so doing he would help me 
 to eliminate this country of a criminal, as I had 
 been gathering evidences so as to bring judicial 
 action against her. I sent this letter by regis- 
 tered mail on the twenty-eighth of December, 
 1908, I got no answer from Mr. Gammon, but 
 only an indirect one from the Intellectually- 
 higher-than-man Woman in the following way. 
 
 Beginning from the third week in December 
 until the end of the first week of January I 
 found on my desk in my room, three letters and 
 one postal card which did not belong to me. 
 They were addressed to the same house, but 
 not to my name. Naturally I put them out of 
 my room. 
 
 Some seven or eight shorthand telegrams were 
 to be seen in the bathroom for a few successive 
 days, written on Western Union blanks, and the 
 same number of envelopes. I did not touch 
 them. 
 
 Two Legal Aid Society pamphlets were laid 
 by somebody on the table at the East Twenty- 
 third Street library, where I went every morn- 
 ing from nine to eleven o'clock, for about three 
 weeks to read a certain book. I had written to 
 Mr. Gammon for evidences against her, but 
 someone in the house showing me the way how 
 I could get evidences, namely, by reading the 
 letters and telegrams of her tramps and women 
 of the street, and then apply to the Legal Aid 
 
"My Name is Legion" 319 
 
 Society. I was only trying to find out who the 
 robber was. She confessed herself to be the 
 one, and this was enough for me for a while. 
 
 After this a few letters were put on the floor 
 outside of my room. One day when I came 
 home after dinner, there was a letter on the floor, 
 and very close to the door, and another one from 
 my sister in my room. The one outside of my 
 room was not addressed to me, so I laid it back 
 on the floor and went into my room. After a 
 little while I heard very light footsteps on the 
 stairway. I listened for a minute or so. Some- 
 one came up softly and went down again. I 
 opened my door; the letter was gone. I was 
 unable to see who it was ; but it must have been 
 the housekeeper. 
 
 The last decoy was a letter, on the envelope 
 of which there was no name or number what- 
 ever ; only "Affix no stamp here" was printed on 
 the right upper corner. It lay on the floor be- 
 hind the door that opens to the street. It was 
 about noon when I came home. I took the 
 letter, examined it, and laid it back on the floor 
 again. It did not belong to me; nor could any- 
 one else justly lay claim to it. I went up to my 
 room, and resolved to do some detective work 
 for the first time. I took oflf my shoes, put on 
 my carpet-sole slippers, and taking my glass 
 went down for water. Water can be had on 
 the second floor, but I went down to 
 the first floor, to watch the fate of the 
 strange letter. She did not keep me waiting 
 very long; the housekeeper came up from the 
 basement, and picking up the letter went back 
 
320 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 to the kitchen. So, I was not mistaken, another 
 bait to entrap me, which was the last of the kind. 
 
 For some time, as mentioned before, a tramp, 
 not always the same one, but changing con- 
 stantly, was sent to the restaurant, wherever I 
 went, to sit opposite me at the same table and 
 ape my actions, while taking my dinner. Later 
 on three or four came together, and sitting close 
 to me, not necessarily at the same table, com- 
 menced to talk about girls, hugging, kissing, etc., 
 in the well known fashion, to give me the idea 
 that all the Americans use obscene language, as 
 if it was not clear enough to me that they were 
 only hired to do that. In the meanwhile, at the 
 library, a young man having an art magazine 
 took a seat next to mine and began to hiss, snifif 
 and hit the table with his fist. This has been 
 done many a time before, and I well knew what 
 it meant, namely, that he had something to 
 show me. There was a nude drawing in the 
 magazine, and he wanted me to look at it ; and I 
 always leaned towards him and looked at it, 
 making him sure that I had noticed the picture. 
 After this he kept quiet and I went on with my 
 study undisturbed. 
 
 I wonder if there is a man or woman in the 
 world who possesses just a little common sense, 
 and still considers unnameable drawings to be 
 creations of art? 
 
 This was only one of the many obscene pic- 
 tures that was drawn on my bench no less than 
 ten times, and exposed to my view over fifty 
 times. There is as much difference between an 
 art and obscene drawing as there is between 
 
"My Name is Legion" 321 
 
 matrimony and debauchery. An immoral 
 woman may not be able to tell the difference, 
 but the world knows it. The first is approved 
 by all and the latter condemned ; and the posi- 
 tive law of this country, as well as that of many 
 others, regards the latter a misdemeanor, and 
 punishes those found guilty of it. 
 
 Drawing or exposing of lewd pictures cannot 
 be justified by the prevalence of art pictures; 
 nor can the obscene talk of a few tramps prove 
 that it is approved by all the Americans in gen- 
 eral, even if this could be said of all the Ameri- 
 cans; still no one is compelled to follow their 
 example. These instances were irrelevant to 
 my case, and I went on with my studies as 
 usual. This conduct of mine, however, seemed 
 to have been contrary to her expectations; the 
 lesson she intended to give was unheeded ; she 
 failed of her end; whereupon she resorted to 
 rash measures in order to bring me into submis- 
 sion. She commenced to annoy me in the 
 library to such a degree as to make it impossible 
 for me to carry on my studies any more. 
 
 One day while reading in the library a tramp 
 came in, and taking a chair, sat behind me. My 
 back was turned to the radiator. Between me 
 and the radiator there was a little space just 
 sufficient for one to pass. He closed that space ; 
 his knee touching my chair. He held a mag- 
 azine in his hand the leaves of which he began 
 to turn, at the rate of about twenty leaves to 
 the minute; and at each turn he giggled as if 
 something funny was on each page. He kept up 
 doing this for two hours. 
 
322 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 The next day another one came, and sitting 
 opposite me commenced to sniflf, from ten to 
 fifteen times per minute, until I went to dinner. 
 After the dinner a new one with a magazine, 
 turning the leaves and giggling like the first one. 
 The next day a new tramp sat opposite to me, 
 who had a magazine in his hand, but he did not 
 look in it more than four or five seconds at a 
 time, when he abruptly lifted up his head and 
 looked to his front over my head, as if some 
 strange thing had happened in the library. 
 After a while he left his seat which was im- 
 mediately taken by another one, who looked as 
 if he was a human volcano, hissing, sniffing, or 
 coughing all the time. It was impossible for 
 me to read any more. I had to give up going 
 to the library, and so I did. But luckily, some 
 time previously to this I had succeeded to ob- 
 tain a card from Ottendorfer — a circulating 
 library, giving a deposit of three dollars in lieu 
 of references. Branches in Carnegie Buildings 
 accept no deposit, but the rest do. Next I went 
 to the catalogue room and made a list of thirty 
 books. If any one of them could be had in a 
 branch within about forty blocks from my 
 room, I went personally and got the book, other- 
 wise sent for it. 
 
 Thus I began to read in my room. She 
 played similar tricks in the restaurants while 
 taking my dinner, whereupon I commenced, 
 about the same time, to take all my meals in my 
 room, which consisted, mainly, of eggs, am- 
 brosia (herissa), and fruit. I went out of my 
 room at ten o'clock in the morning daily, and 
 
"My Name is Legion" 323 
 
 came back at half-past eleven; and in the eve- 
 nings I was out from four-thirty to six o'clock 
 for a walk. On Sundays I went to the Central 
 park and had rather a long walk, from ten 
 A.M. to three-fifteen P.M.; at other times I 
 was in my room. 
 
 She made a last but unsuccessful attempt to 
 disturb my study in my room. The two tramps 
 in the opposite room, besides disturbing my 
 sleep, they aped all my actions. They got up 
 in the morning together with me, went out about 
 five minutes before I did and came home about 
 as many minutes later. Such aping did not 
 bother me much, though "in the beginning it had 
 been very hard to bear, but not so at this time; 
 my sensibility had become deadened by per- 
 sistent familiarity for five years. But they also 
 let the cat out in the back yard, right under my 
 window, early in the morning. She cried until 
 ten o'clock when I went out, and when I came 
 back the cat was to be seen near the front door, 
 outside of it. Ten or fifteen minutes after I 
 went to my room, someone let the cat in and 
 drove her to the third floor; she did not stay 
 there, but went down to the ground floor. She 
 wanted to get into the kitchen, but the door was 
 locked, so she began to cry again until four- 
 thirty in the evening, when I went out to take 
 my regular walk. I saw the housekeeper twice 
 beating the cat. I suppose, for not crying loud 
 enough so as to disturb my study; but to tny 
 judgment, no fault could have been found with 
 the cat ; she cried not less than eight hours daily 
 for two weeks, when an assistant was brought 
 
324 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 to cry during the night. For three more days 
 the two cats cried alternately day and night. 
 These were pitiful, heart-rending cries, very 
 hard for me to endure, but there was no escape. 
 I pretended never to take notice of them; and 
 they seeing the uselessness of making the cats 
 cry, stopped it. 
 
 At this time I was making a close study of 
 the evolution of some of the animals. For five 
 successive Sundays I went to the Fossil Mammal 
 Hall in the museum of natural history. After 
 taking my dinner I went there, but being always 
 a little early, I sat on a bench in the Central 
 Park and waited there until one o'clock, when 
 the doors open. 
 
 One Sunday, while sitting on a bench in the 
 park a young man came and sat beside me. 
 After a few minutes he said, "Is that Mr. 
 Carnegie in the cab?" 
 
 "I do not know," I said. "Is Mr. Carnegie 
 in New Yprk?" 
 
 "No," he said, "he is in Scotland." 
 
 He did not stay there more than a minute, 
 but went to the museum before me. I thought 
 that only the Intellectually-higher-than-man 
 Woman could bring Mr. Carnegie from Scotland 
 to New York to have a drive on Sundays and 
 send him back to Scotland on the same day. 
 Apparently she tried to make me understand 
 that I was still being watched wherever I went. 
 
 On the fourteenth of March I went there and 
 sat down on a bench as usual. There were two 
 nurses and two little children, besides a baby 
 in the carriage, on the next bench. They had 
 
"My Name is Legion" 325 
 
 been there before me. After a little while one 
 of them taking a kodak pretended to take the 
 photo of the children. She tried from different 
 directions, but seemed not to like them. At last 
 she brought the children and set them in line 
 with me. Then I knew she was trying to take 
 my photo. I looked direct to the lense, thus 
 giving her a chance to make a good one, easy to 
 identify me with it, if it became necessary so to 
 do. She snapped the kodak, and I suppose, she 
 took my photo. I marked the date in my pocket- 
 book and went to the museum. 
 
 The following Sunday I was sitting there 
 again. There was a big crowd, but the nurses 
 were not there. After about ten minutes I 
 heard a woman's voice saying: "Here is the 
 place where we took the photo last Sunday: do 
 you remember?" 
 
 I turned to the direction whence the voice 
 came, and saw the very same nurse who had 
 taken my photo the previous Sunday, about 
 three yards away from me, speaking to the 
 other nurse who stood so close to me that her 
 dress almost touched my knee. I had taken the 
 end seat of a bench, and she stood between the 
 end of my bench and the second one. 
 
 "Yes, I remember," she said, and moved to- 
 wards her. They went away together. 
 
 The Intellectually-higher-than-man Woman 
 first made a collection of my handwritings and 
 signatures, but was unable to scare me out of 
 this country; and now she takes my photo, and 
 wants me to know that she has it, expecting that, 
 as soon as I heard of it, I would run away be- 
 
326 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 fore giving her time to have me arrested. 
 
 I wonder if all the women are such cowards 
 as this one ? I hope not. There may be some who 
 l^ave a little more sense and are more reason- 
 able. It is five years now, and yet I have been 
 unable to make her understand that nothing in 
 the world could scare me. I can be governed by 
 right and wrong; submission to what is right 
 and true ; opposition to what is false and wrong. 
 She may succeed in raising the whole world 
 against me by her inexhaustable lies and wealth, 
 yet she gains nothing, unless she comes bravely 
 face to face with me, speaks reason, and shows 
 me my mistake. She can bend me but not break. 
 
 We were in May, the last month of the spring 
 of the year of 1909. The women had done their 
 best to ensnare me, but all in vain, Something 
 else was to be done. The two tramps on the 
 third floor began to bring a girl into their room 
 some evenings at seven o'clock, and let her out 
 at nine. My door was closed all the time; I 
 could not see her, but I could hear her voice; 
 she talked and laughed very loud while coming 
 in or going out. 
 
 One evening while reading I noticed the two 
 leaves of the book were torn off. I well knew 
 the same book could be had at the West Twenty- 
 third Street library. I went there immediately, 
 and taking the book I read those four missing 
 pages, and returned to my room at about nine 
 o'clock. While coming back the girl met me on 
 the stairway. She was going out. She looked 
 to be a young girl of about sixteen years old. 
 This encounter reminded me, in a sudden, 
 
"My Name is Legion" 327 
 
 of the tramp on the recreation building, and of 
 what he had said, namely, that he had a room 
 for which he paid only one dollar and a half a 
 week and could take girls into his room. He 
 had asked me if I would not like to have a like 
 room, and I had paid no attention to him. Now, 
 others, rooming with me in the same house and 
 on the same floor, were using their rooms for 
 improper purposes, meaning, apparently, that I 
 also could do the very same thing; exercise my 
 choice. The housekeeper made no objection to it. 
 
 The girl went out, and this was the last time; 
 she never came to their room again. 
 
 In spite of all this I still refused to follow 
 their example. Could she do anything else for 
 me ? Certainly. The same tramp, on the recrea- 
 tion building, had also said that "Some women 
 wouldn't let you bring outsiders in ; they want to 
 come themselves." 
 
 The housekeeper was the only woman with 
 whom, now and then, I exchanged a word or 
 two, because I had to pay the rent of my room 
 every week, or make inquries about papers and 
 packages that might have come in my name. 
 Should she show some inclination, would I 
 avail myself of the opportunity? Better try 
 once. So long as she has the "almighty dollar" 
 she can try anything. So, one day, at about 
 noon, when I came home, I found the door of 
 every room in the house (nine rooms in all), 
 wide open and no one was to be seen in them. 
 On the third floor I saw the housekeeper mak- 
 ing the bed in the room next to mine, As soon 
 
328 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 as she saw me, she said, "I am the only one 
 in the building." 
 
 She had left every door open so as to leave 
 no room for doubt. I could not disbelieve, 
 under the circumstances, what she said. She 
 was the only one in the building. Well, what 
 did I care ? Why, I was a young man in love, 
 and she was the only woman in the house, and 
 so close to my room. 
 
 "You are well off, then," I said, "there is no 
 one to bother you." And went to my room and 
 closed the door. I always kept the door of my 
 room closed. 
 
 She failed again, but there was yet one more 
 source of hope for success; another and the 
 last trap — the woman on the second floor, who; 
 as mentioned before, pretended to be very 
 wealthy. She had a big pile of dresses in her 
 room, and changed her dress several times in 
 a day. She ordered her meals brought to her 
 rooms, went out, now and then, in a cab, and 
 also she threw, occasionally, secret glances at 
 me, implying that I was an object of interest 
 for her, and would very much like to meet me 
 or make my acquaintance, if I only should take 
 the first step. She kept up doing this for five 
 months. At last tired of waiting she took the 
 first step herself. One Sunday afternoon when 
 I came home from the Central Park, I met her 
 standing in front of her room. 
 
 "My door is locked," she said, "Mrs. Lederle 
 (the housekeeper), has the key and she is out. 
 Will you please, try if your key will open my 
 door?" 
 
"My Name is Legion" 329 
 
 After a silence of five months, the wealthy 
 lady spoke to me. I tried, but it did not open. 
 She thanked me very much, and I went to my 
 room. 
 
 The next day she perfumed the bathroom, 
 the stairway, the passageway, in fact, almost 
 the whole building. I could hardly get a chance 
 to go to the bathroom. She hung about in front 
 of her room all day long. I behaved towards 
 her as if she was a perfect stranger. I did not 
 look at her face, much less speak to her. 
 
 The last week of June, as well as the first 
 two weeks of July were quite warm. During 
 these three weeks she left her door open, took 
 her clothing off, and exposed her semi-nude 
 figure to me daily, sometimes walking, other 
 times seated on a chair or lying on her bed. 
 And the door of her room was never locked 
 during the nights, the key being in the lock, in- 
 serted into it from the outside. Beginning from 
 the second week of July she did not expose her- 
 self to my view but once in a week, either on 
 Saturday or Sunday; and later on, only once in 
 a fortnight until September. 
 
 From the window of my room three build- 
 ings were visible. In the one, on the left, there 
 were seen to be six or seven dressmakers. The 
 opposite building was a hotel, and there were 
 a number of women-servants there ; in the build- 
 ing on the left there was, I think, but one 
 woman. Whenever I went near my window a 
 regular show commenced in those buildings; 
 the expenses were, of course, defrayed bv the 
 Jntellectually-higher-than-man Woman. Some- 
 
330 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 one opened a window, while another closed one ; 
 one shook a handkerchief, another let the lace 
 curtain down leaving a little hole on the one 
 side of it. These free shows were given to 
 me for a whole year. In September the dress- 
 makers went away from the building; the 
 women in the hotel had each one a baby in her 
 arm ; so likewise, the woman on the left had one, 
 while the wealthy woman on the second floor in 
 our building had a young man in her room one 
 night. 
 
 How to account for such a sudden and 
 strange change that had occured in the neigh- 
 borhood? Could she have another lesson, in- 
 genuously devised and deliberately prepared, to 
 give me? 
 
 The woman had failed to entrap me; she 
 gives now a dififerent meaning to it ; she changes 
 her color. Another example to teach me the 
 American ways. Those women, who had been 
 flirting with me all the year round, .were mar- 
 ried women, and had children ; and even the 
 wealthy woman in the house, who flirted with 
 me and showed her semi-nude figure daily for 
 three weeks, was married, too. I saw her to- 
 gether with her husband in her room. Now, this 
 is the way the American women behave. They 
 all flirt with men, even mothers and grand- 
 mothers; they even expose their nude body to 
 the opposite sex just for the fun of it. Now 
 you know American ways and manners ; see that 
 you look for a position, and go on with your 
 clock repairing, in the meanwhile, I will give 
 
"My Name is Legion" 331 
 
 you some more examples and make you a per- 
 fect American. 
 
 After this she gave me a ten-day rest. One 
 of the women had gone in June; the wealthy 
 woman was absent, probably on a visit; she had 
 the room, paid the rent, but she was not there 
 day or night. The tramps also, on the third 
 floor, left their room, and there were no sleep- 
 disturbers. But I went on with my studies as 
 usual. The changes round me had no effect 
 upon me. Her expectations were not realized; 
 she had failed again. 
 
 What would I not give to know this ignorant 
 and immoral woman's inmost thoughts which 
 crowded in her mind at this time. She had 
 given me so many concrete examples as to how 
 American women behave themselves, and how 
 American young men swear, "cuss," use pro- 
 fane language and obscene talk; they make ap- 
 pointments with new married women to call 
 upon them when their husband is not in; they 
 draw art pictures, the originals of which are to 
 be found on the walls of some of the public 
 toilets. And yet Mrs. Ella Wheeler Wilcox had 
 said that Americans had the highest morals 
 among the nations of the world. She had tried 
 very hard, and spent thousands of dollars, to 
 teach me the American manner of living, to raise 
 my foreign low morals to the height of the 
 American morals; in a word, to make me a 
 highly moralized and civilized American, but she 
 had failed. In fact, she had never before in her 
 life realized so convincingly the often repeated 
 fact, that some nations are incapable of pro- 
 
332 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 gress, that it is impossible to infuse in them 
 American high ideals. She could have made 
 thousands of Americans kneel down before 
 those "almighty dollars," which she spent to re- 
 form me, to do good to me. And still I was in- 
 flexible, stubborn, unbent and unmoved like a 
 lifeless rock. If she had authority, she would 
 have me tied hands and feet and "Cast into the 
 midst of a burning fiery furnace." What else 
 could she do for me. So long as she had more 
 money to spend, and I more life to live, many 
 other things might still be done. 
 
 A Martian young man, who had been a close 
 friend of mine for a number of years, and who, 
 for the last eighteen months, was keeping away 
 from me on account of this case, surprised me, 
 one day in September, by coming into my room. 
 
 "I am hungry," he said, "I did not have my 
 dinner yet, so, I cannot stay very long here. I 
 hear you gave up clock repairing, and have been 
 doing literary work." 
 
 "You have been informed quite right." 
 
 "Why did you give up clock repairing; 
 any reason for it?" 
 
 "I like literary work better." 
 
 "What do you intend to become, or what line 
 to follow?" 
 
 "I have been studying the English language 
 with a view to writing a book. I shall commence 
 writing it the first of March, 1910." 
 
 "Will it be a novel, or what?" 
 
 "It will be about my love affair in P , of 
 
 which I have told you already." 
 
 It was evident from his expression that he 
 
"My Name is Legion" 333 
 
 did not believe me at all. He took it just for a 
 joke. After examining my typewriter and the 
 books, he left me, having been but fifteen 
 minutes in my room. 
 
 After about a month he called again upon me 
 in my room, but stayed, this time, for five hours. 
 I told him the old story, namely, that I was 
 getting prepared to write a book upon the very 
 same subject. But I could not make him believe, 
 by no matter what I said. I had made a sketch 
 of the story, consisting of one hundred pages. I 
 took it out of my desk and read to him the first 
 two pages, and a third one from the middle. I 
 said nothing else. He was perfectly convinced. 
 He took my hand into his, and shook it wishing 
 me success. "You may be able to make money 
 with that book," he said. 
 
 "I have not aimed at making money," I said, 
 "but if I do make money, I shall consider it as 
 a by-product." 
 
 It was about six o'clock in the evening when 
 he left me and went out never to return again. 
 
 According to my old plan I was to continue 
 my study until March, 1910, and then commence 
 writing of the book. But I contracted a throat 
 trouble (inflammation of the esophagus), which 
 proved to be a severe kind; the inflammation 
 having spread way down into my lungs, and it 
 became impossible for me to read for more than 
 half an hour at a time. And then I had to rest 
 from two to three hours before I could read for 
 another half an hour. In order not to lose time 
 I decided to discontinue reading, and commence 
 writing my story. Luckily, it did not interfere 
 
334 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 with my writing, or only very little. It was in 
 the first week of December when I began to 
 write. 
 
 The last woman left the house in the latter 
 part of October. Not long after, the two rooms 
 on the second floor were occupied by two young 
 men. They behaved towards me just like the 
 women had done before them. They went and 
 new ones came. They did the very same thing. 
 She multiplied the instances as much as she 
 could, in order to confound me; but everything 
 was very clear to me. I could see no inscrut- 
 ableness in the Inscrutable Woman. 
 
 The room on the third floor was occupied by 
 two night-workers, or sleep-disturbers. After a 
 few weeks they went and a new one came. But 
 a decreasing intensity was clearly noticeable irt 
 the discharge of their mission. Those who 
 came last were not as rough, rash, or inconsid- 
 erate as the ones before them had been. The 
 fury of the storm had been abating gradually. 
 She had been trying to bury and conceal for- 
 ever from human knowledge what I had aimed 
 at digging out and exposing to the world. Men 
 and women should live an open life. Do noth- 
 ing that you would be ashamed of doing in the 
 presence of others. 
 
 Mrs. Lederle, the housekeeper, seemed to be 
 averse to lose her share in this great fun. One 
 day when I came home I found the floor of my 
 room sprinkled with cigar ashes, and some nine 
 or ten cigar ends. The odor being offensive to 
 me, as I do not smoke, I immediately called her 
 up to my room and demanded an explanation. 
 
"My Name is Legion" 335 
 
 "I cleaned the next room," she said, "and put 
 those cigar ashes in a towel, and when I came 
 into your room I laid it on the floor and forgot 
 that there was ashes in it; while going out of 
 your room I must have taken hold of the end of 
 the towel and let the ashes fall on the floor." 
 
 In the first place, they were so pvenly scattered 
 on the floor covering an area of about four 
 square feet that they could not have been let 
 fall in the way she described. And secondly, 
 "I have never heard of anyone putting cigar 
 ashes in a towel,"- 1 said. 
 
 "Oh, it is to be washed, anyhow," she said. 
 
 Another day when I came into my room, I 
 noticed something stuffed in one of my slippers. 
 I pulled it out and examined it. It was the half 
 of a woman's drawer. I do not know what ex- 
 cuse she had for it; but I made no mention of 
 it. I simply laid it outside of my room. After 
 a day or two it was gone. 
 
 "Do these spiders," I said one day, "pay you 
 anything for occupying the four corners of my 
 room ?" 
 
 "What?" she said. 
 
 "Come here, please," I said, "and I will show 
 them to you." 
 
 Whereupota she stepped in and I showed her 
 the cobwebs. 
 
 "Oh, they are lucky," she said. 
 
 "Poor mortals as we were," I said to myself; 
 "how short life is, when there are so many 
 things to learn." 
 
 She never touched them; nor did I. After a 
 time it looked as if those little creatures took 
 
336 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 heart, became bolder and bolder, until one morn- 
 ing I noticed my bedstead tied to the wall with 
 their tiny ropes. Thenceforward I was safe; 
 there was no danger of being washed off to 
 the sea. 
 
 One day my umbrella lay on my bed, another 
 day one of the books dropped on the floor; some- 
 times I found the bottle of my tooth-powder 
 knocked down, other times my fan or a picture 
 dropped on the floor. She never upset the 
 things in my room all at a time, like the negro 
 in the boarding house, but only one at a time. 
 Because the negro did not care whether I stayed 
 there or not; if not, he would have less work 
 to do and still get the same wages. But the 
 case was entirely different with Mrs. Lederle. 
 Her personal interest required that she should 
 please the two parties at once. I was a per- 
 manent roomer and paid the rent in advance, 
 and, besides, I had brought a train of roomers 
 along with me, and also she was, undoubtedly, 
 well paid for ber services. Naturally, she was 
 careful not to make my condition intolerable so 
 as to lose me, and thus deprive herself of the 
 regular income. But I never thought of chang- 
 ing my room, because I well knew that wherever 
 I went the succubus would follow me. I would 
 only lose time. 
 
 But there are many roguish tricks which the 
 Intellectually-higher-than-man Woman played 
 upon me, which, if they were written everyone, 
 the world itself, I think, would not be able to 
 contain the books that should be written. 
 
 Some have likened women to angels. These 
 
"My Name is Legion" 337 
 
 people, I suppose, imagine angels to be animals. 
 Woman is angel-like, because, they say, like A. 
 Cumte, she is affectionate. The dog is more so. 
 She is cunning, sly, tricky; the fox is so, too. 
 These qualities cannot be applied to angels. Af- 
 fection is an emotion; and all the emotions are 
 disturbances in the human frame. Contrast a 
 woman tossed with some emotion, her heart 
 palpitating, cheeks reddened, the whole frame 
 trembling, with a philosopher calm and quiet, 
 enjoying an undisturbed serenity, moving in an 
 atmosphere of pure thought, and making the 
 perturbations, labors, and struggles of others 
 only an object of investigation. Which one of 
 the two is divine or angelic? Angels are thought 
 to hold an intermediate place between God and 
 human beings. To predicate of them affection, 
 or any of the emotions, is assigning them a stage 
 below man, or only equal to him. Angels must 
 have been cured of the diseases, the emotions, be- 
 fore they became angels. In like manner, men 
 and women are to be cured before they become 
 angels. If women are the more affectionate, 
 then they are the more diseased, and the more in 
 need of a cure. 
 
 The affections of a mother are of use in the 
 nursery; and this only, if she is not alive to her 
 moral duties to her offspring. 
 
 "Civilization raised the position of women," 
 has been a catch-word of the writers of the last 
 two centuries. Why not the same civilization, 
 if it has any magic or miraculous power, raise 
 the position of the Bowery tramps, and elect 
 
338 The Inscrutable Woman 
 
 president, judges, governors, and mayors from 
 among them? 
 
 You do not have to empty your oil barrel in 
 the sun; it will shine, give heat and light with- 
 out your oil. If the tramp raises himself, the 
 nation will elect him to the office which he de- 
 serves. If women staiid high in any quality, or 
 in all the qualities which are attributed to human 
 beings, they will exhibit them, but if they stand 
 low, and civilization raises them up, it sins 
 against God and commits crime against society. 
 There is but one attribute to human beings which 
 raises them above the animals, and that is reason 
 or inteUigence. Intelligence is the measuring- 
 rod with which the relative worth of men and 
 women are measured or to be measured, and the 
 respective rank of each assigned. By this 
 method the average woman's inferiority to the 
 average man becomes obvious; and she can do 
 no better than acknowledge her subordination to 
 him. In the nursery her duty is to lead; in 
 social affairs, to follow. As soon as she shows 
 her intellectual superiority to man, let her take 
 the lead and the man follow. So far as I am 
 concerned, I greatly prefer to be led by some 
 reasonable man or woman than to lead. There 
 is nothing more hateful to me than to be a leader, 
 apart from the consideration that it is as hard to 
 lead as it is easy to follow. To lead is to walk 
 over rugged mountains and dales; to follow, 
 over smooth pavements. The former is to lay 
 railroad tracks, the latter, to travel in a train. 
 
 The average man raises the average woman; 
 the average woman "razes" the average man; 
 
"My Name is Legion" 339 
 
 nor can it be otherwise, so long as divine in- 
 telligence predominates in man, and brute, blind 
 love in woman. 
 
 The best man in the world, for a woman, is 
 the one who -admires her, and speaks good of 
 her. Woman's affections and smiles can only be 
 had in exchange for songs of praise to her name. 
 Rub her back, and she purrs; speak reason, and 
 she scratches your face. 
 
 Women should be excluded from public action. 
 They should be raised above material care, and 
 well educated with a view to fitting them to the 
 reproductive function, care, and primary educa- 
 tion, of children. 
 
 She still has a chimpanzee, a baboon, a horse, 
 a fox, and two common apes in the house; and 
 a few monkeys outside, so I can only say: 
 
 TO BE CONTINUED! 
 
OUR NEWEST ISSUES 
 
 (vo 5J CX** fl C&jOJQ GtffJ) CW^JQ 02^jO G?k2Lfl OiiPjOCNO 5)C>^P 5)C>j'' 5)C>jP JF)6X2^ 
 
 sSfew 5^0(0 V"C* >oT^''/o?a V"C^ v.S!(° v"k^ 5^^010 9^0^ 55^010 5^0^ ^iSjC* 
 
 By Wilbert C. Blakeman. 
 The Black Hand 1.50 
 
 By John W. Bennett. ', 
 
 Roosevelt and the Republic i.Sni 
 
 By Hon. Joseph M. Brown. 
 
 (Governor of Georgia.) 
 
 Astyanax — ^An Epic Romance _.:.-. x.50 
 
 By John Tracy Mygatt. 
 What I Do Not Know of Farming 75 
 
 By Esmee Walton. 
 Aurora of Poverty Hill 1.50 
 
 By Josephine Merwin Cook. 
 Bandana Days • . . ...1 •^^S 
 
 By Howard James. 
 The Wraith of Knopf and Other Stories. ..... z.00 
 
 By George Fuller Golden. 
 My Lady Vaudeville and Her White Rats.... 2.00 
 
 4 
 
 By J.,A. Salmon-Maclean. \ 
 
 Leisure Moments i.oo' 
 
 A Stricken City , .50 
 
OUR NEWEST ISSUES 
 
 S^^2p?C ^Kfe ^^^ yp^ ^?dP 9^° ^^pS'^^^f^'^^SrSf^^ySH 
 
 By James A. Ritchey, Ph.D. 
 Psychology of the Will $1,50 
 
 By Charles Hallock, M. A. . 
 
 Peerless Alaska l.oa ! 
 
 « 
 
 By Dwight Edwards Marvin. 
 
 Prof. Slagg of London 1.50 
 
 The Christman 1.50 
 
 By Caroline Mays Brevard. 
 Literature of the South 1.50 
 
 By Susan Archer Weiss. 
 Home Life of Poe (3d ed.) 1.50 
 
 By Irving Wilson Voorhees, M.D. 
 Teachings of Thomas Henry Huxley (2d ed.) . i.oo 
 
 By Mrs. Annie Riley Hale. 
 Rooseveltian Fact and Fable 1.00 
 
 By Hon. D. W. Higgins. 
 The Mystic Spring X.5* 
 
 By Edith NichoU Ellison. 
 The Burnt-Offering ij»g 
 
OUR NEWEST ISSUES 
 
 fiJsiS^isSLJD '^IsSlS **?sSJi) *'N2JDQ»?j9cv> 5)cn/> flexor c>iP s) Ofisj^/) cxpjD (*)s£A 
 
 By Alexandre Erixon. 
 The Vale of Shadows 1.50 
 
 By Mrs. Josephine M. Clarke. 
 The King Squirrel of Central Park (Juvenile) ., .60 
 
 By William N. Freeman. 
 St. Mammon 2.50 
 
 By Mrs. I. Lowenberg. 
 The Irresistible Current 1.50 
 
 By M. Y. T. H. Myth. 
 
 Tales of Enchantment i.oo 
 
 A Tale Confided by the Woods 75 
 
 By Ida Blanche Wall. 
 Comedy of Petty Conflicts 1.25 
 
 By Elizabeth Helene Freston. 
 
 Poems (portrait) beautifully bound 1,00 
 
 Italia's Fomarina (leather) 3.00 
 
 Compiled by Darwin W. Esmond. 
 Poetry of Childhood, by Paul Warner Esmond 
 (Memorial Edition) 1.50 
 
; t: — ■* I| Kj