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CHRISTIAN CORRESPONDENCL 
 
 BEING 
 
 A COLLECTION OF LETTERS, 
 
 WRITTEN BY THE I.ATE 
 
 REV. JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 AND SEVERAL 
 
 METHODIST PREACHERS, 
 
 IN CONNECTION WITH HIM. 
 TO THE Late 
 
 MRS. ELIZA: BENNIS, 
 
 WITH HER ANSWERS, 
 
 I 
 
 Chiefly Explaining and Enforcing the Doctrine of 
 Sanctijication. 
 
 HOW FIRST PUBLISHED FROM THE ORIGINALS. 
 
 PHILADELPHIA 
 
 i'aiNTtD BY B.GRAVES, NO. 40, NORTH FOt'RTH STREET5 
 1?0H THOMAS BENNIS, NO. 121, MULBERRY STREET. 
 
 1809. 
 
District of Pennsylvania, to <U)ii .• 
 
 BE it remembered, that on the tenth day of May, in the 
 thirty-third Year of tlie Independence of the United States 
 of America, A. D. 1809 ; Thomas Bennis of the said District, 
 hath deposited in this office, the Title of a Book, the Right 
 whereof he claims as Proprietor, in the words following, to 
 wit : 
 
 " Christian Correspondence.. ..being A Collection of Let- 
 ters, written by the late Rev. John Wesley. And several 
 Methodist Preachers, in connection with him. To the late 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis, with her answers. Chiefly explaining the 
 and Enforcing the Doctrine of Sanctification. Now first pub- 
 lished from the Originals.'* 
 
 In Conformity to the Act of the Congress of the United 
 States, intituled, '* Act for the Encouragement of Learning, 
 by securing the Copies of Maps, Charts, and books, to the 
 Authors and Proprietoi's of such Copies during the Times 
 therein mentioned." And also to the Act, entitled *' An Act 
 .supplementary to an Act, entitled, "An Act for the Encour- 
 agement of Learning, by securing the Copies of Maps, Charts, 
 and Books, to the Authors and Proprietors of such Copies du- 
 ring the Time therein mentioned," and extending the Benefits 
 thereof to the Arts of designing, engraving, and etching 
 historical and other Prints." 
 I ( L. S. ) D. CALDWELL, 
 
 Clerk of tie Disttict of Pennyslvania. 
 
 mm THE 
 
 t. 
 
 i*% 
 

 f\DVERTISEMENT. 
 
 THE Publisher declines writing any re- 
 gular Preface to the following pages, lest it 
 lioiild be considered a panegyric on his de- 
 eased mother;.,. Her works now praise her in 
 the Gate.... To all who were acquainted with 
 her; her worth was well known.... and to those 
 who did not kno^v her, her character v/ill 
 shine with more lustre from these letters,than 
 by any encomiums that might be heaped on 
 it.... 
 
 Hilt he thin^ii! U \V^':''-i:S W} ::..■.../..; l^.J ;c:t^■- 
 
 r how he came by these letters.... On his mo- 
 ther's death... (in Philadelphia, June 1802).. .» 
 her books and papers devolved to him, among 
 which were theOriginals from whence thepre- 
 sent work is copied, their perusal often afford- 
 ed much satisfuCtion to him and family, and on 
 occasionally reading a few of them to some re- 
 ligious friends, they advised their publicatiou. 
 urging as a reason, that they had found much 
 
. iv ; 
 
 christian strength and benefit from them; and 
 that it was a duty incumbent on the possessor 
 to extend their usefuliness... under this idea, 
 they are now presented to the public, in their 
 native garb... (a few local circumstances only 
 being suppressed) and if they should be made 
 a means in the hands of God, of awakening, 
 convincing or comforting Oiie Soul, the pub- 
 lisher's trouble Vvili be fully repaid. 
 
 THOMAS BENNIS. 
 'Philadelphia, May 1 809. 
 
CHRISTIAN CORRESPONDENCE 
 
 BEING 
 
 A COLLECTION OF LETTERS, 
 
 WRITTEN BY THE LATE 
 
 REV. JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 THE LATE 
 
 MRS. ELIZA BENNi;S. 
 
 AND OTHERS 
 
 LETTER L 
 
 From Mrs. Eliza Bennis......To the Rev. 
 
 John Wesley. 
 
 Limerick^ August 2, 1763. 
 
 REV. AND DEAR SIR, 
 
 AFTER many struggles, (from a sense 
 of my inability), I have at last ventured to 
 lay the state of my mind before you, request- 
 ing your opinion and advice. 
 
 About four years ago, I was given to sec 
 the absolute necessity of holiness of heart,.... 
 was burdened under the weight of my corrup- 
 tions, and could not be satisfied, with less 
 A 2 
 
( 6 ) 
 
 than a total deliverance,.... though Mr. Oliv- 
 ers (who was then stationed here) preached 
 this doctrine, yet very lew would receive it; 
 so that I was partly reasoned and partly laugh- 
 ed out ot my earnestness, and by degrees lost 
 all hope and desire after it, and sunk into a 
 dead formal state, 'till I became a back-slider 
 in heart, having only the sad remembrance 
 of what I lost,... this made me completely mi- 
 serable, because truly sensible of my state, 
 but as utterly unable to struggle out of it, as 
 lo create a new world. In this state 1 was, 
 when you were last here,... the doctrine of ho- 
 liness which you then revived, however desi- 
 •rable in itself, only tended to aggravate my 
 guilt;.. .the beauty of holiness stood continu- 
 ally before me, but I dared not reach after it, 
 it seemed as the childrens bread which I must 
 not touch; till in one of your sermons you 
 described my state more clearly than I could 
 myself, and desired ** that such should not be 
 dismayed, but seek after both pardon, and 
 holiness, that God was able to give the two 
 blessings at once, and you did not find it said 
 in scripture that he would not;" these words 
 ^came with such power to my soul, and garc 
 
( ? ) 
 
 me such encouragement, that I was deter- 
 mined never to rest 'till God had made 
 me a witness of this truth. In a few weeks 
 after, the Lord did heal my back-slidings, and 
 greatly refresh my soul ; but this did not suf- 
 fice ; I found still an evil heart of unbelief, 
 bent to back- slide from God; a stubborn per- 
 verse will, that would not be subject to the 
 Divine will ; and an enmity in my heart 
 against God, neither could I give up all for 
 him.... I found many idols in my heart, which 
 I had not power to give up, though I griev- 
 ed to see them there,... in this state I could 
 not rest and was determined I would not ; but 
 here the fear of deceiving myself, made me 
 put the blessing from me, I looked for it to 
 come with observation, and was not content 
 to receive it in the ^^ small still voice, ^^ I had 
 large manifestations of the love of God, and 
 many comfortable texts of scripture occurred 
 to me, and my soul at times emptied of all 
 but God, yet could not receive this as the 
 blessing I was seeking, because the measure- 
 of joy I felt, was not greater than what I had= 
 often before experienced, though my com- 
 forts were stronger; thus I continued for 
 
C 8 ) 
 
 some time, resisting the grace of God, and 
 \<^ould not receive him in his own way, least I 
 should deceive myself, 'till I fell back again 
 into my former state ; feeling the weight of 
 my corruptions more than ever; then I could 
 clearly see I had resisted the graceof God,... 
 but soon determined never to rest with- 
 out it, and was now content to receive him 
 in his own way, content to be any things to 
 die if only by death I might be delivered from 
 my burden... thus I remained 'till the 22nd 
 May last, (being Whit Sunday) when going 
 to the Lord's- Tabic heavy laden with the bur- 
 den of my coiTuptions, but particularly be- 
 cause of the enmity I found in my heart 
 against God, I there found my burden much 
 heavierand therefore cried the more earnestly, 
 when these words were applied to my heart, 
 ^^ helie^est thou that I am able to do thisV^ 
 my soul immediately answered. Lord I be- 
 lieve thou art able ; the word came again ^ 
 ** Be it unto thee according to thy faith'''' here 
 unbelief came in, and raised disturbance in 
 my soul, and I could only cry, Lordgiiie me 
 faith i"*^ I was now filled with large expecta- 
 tion and a firm persuasion that God would 
 
( 9 ) 
 
 bless me, thus I continued till the second of 
 June, when at prayer I found in a moment 
 my idols taken away, and my will wholly 
 subjected to the will of God... nothing re- 
 mained in my lieart to oppose his will or 
 work, and such a measure of peace and love 
 poured into my soul, as left no room for 
 doubt,... I had not at this time such a mea- 
 sure of joy, as I have often had before, but 
 such a calm serenity of soul as I had never be- 
 fore experienced,! sought for my corruptions 
 but could not find them ; the enmity that was 
 before in my heart was taken away and it was 
 filled with love both to God and his people, 
 and so far as I have stated it still continues, 
 only with this difference, I often find heavi- 
 ness of soul and then am apt to suspect my 
 love to God, I know of no competitor he has 
 in my soul at any time, but cannot at all times 
 find my affections warm to him, . . .my thoughts 
 are not always on God or the things of God, 
 even when they are not necessarily employed 
 they are frequently taken away on I know 
 not what, and it is hard to stay them aright ; 
 I frequently find deadness in prajer, and ab- 
 sence under the word, I do not ahvays sec 
 
( 10 ) 
 
 God ; in employment and conversation my 
 eye is often taken off from him, and some- 
 tim esa thoughtless forgetful spirit... .Indeed 
 hitherto the lord has kept me from sin, I find 
 no desire towards it, I love the law and purity 
 of God, and find a jealousy over myself lest 
 I should even in thought offend, I find no 
 condemnation, but do ahvays even in the 
 most grievous temptations know that God for 
 Christ's sake has forgiven my sins... this evi- 
 dence I have had clear without intermission 
 since the second of June, which I could never 
 say before, for in temptations it was often 
 clouded, but now Satan seems to level his darts 
 against this late work that God has wrought in 
 me, and indeed I find his temptations 
 sharp, strong and continued, insomuch that 
 it is f-'?n-iei-i.nes Inird lo Lt:iud c^r^r^^nu ihcni,, 
 and am often at a loss to know whether they be 
 temptations or not ; and am often tempted to 
 think I keep a presumptuous hold,... I almost 
 continually have questionings in my mind 
 concerning it, and often think the blessings 
 have received are only the effects of justifying 
 faith, tho' I find I would not be satisfied with 
 this, and do earnestly desire the witness of the 
 
( 11 
 
 spirit to ascertain whjil God has wrought ; but 
 find freqiu nt reprools for this, telling me that 
 God has not cleansed my heart, therefore that 
 it is not right I should look for the witness ; 
 that when he does the one, he will give the 
 other.... Indeed I think the words sanctifica- 
 tiouj a c/ea?i heart, and lovifig God with all the 
 heart, are great expressions, and such as I 
 cannot appropriate to my state, because of the 
 deficiencies I have already mentioned, there- 
 fore request your thoughts and advice. And 
 am Rev. and dear sir, 
 
 Your Respectful and Affectionate 
 Friend in Christ Jesus, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER IL 
 
 Rev John Wesley....to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 Pembroke August, 23, 1763. 
 My Dear Sister. 
 
 You did well to write, this is one of 
 the means which God genenally uses to 
 convey either light or comfort ; even while 
 you are writing you will often find relief, 
 
( 12 ) 
 
 frequently while we propose a doubt it is re- 
 moved. 
 
 There is no doubt but what you at first ex- 
 perienced was a real foretaste of the blessing, 
 altho' you was not properly possessed of it, 
 Hill the Whitsunday following; but it is very 
 possible to cast away the gift of God, or to 
 lose it, by little arid little... tho' I trust this is 
 not the case with you, and yet you may fre- 
 quently be in heaviness, and may find your 
 love to God not near so warm at some times, 
 as it is at others, many wanderings likewise, 
 and many deficiencies, arc consistent with 
 pure love; but the thing you want is, the 
 abiding witness of the Spirit touching thisvery 
 thing. And this you may boldly claim, on the 
 warrant of that word ** we have received the 
 Spirit that is of God; that we may kncm the 
 things which are freely given to us of God,^^ 
 I am, my Dear Sister, 
 
 Your Affectionate Brother, 
 
 JOHN WESLEY 
 
( ^s ) 
 LETTER in. 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis....to the Kevd. John Wesley. 
 Limerick^ March* 11, liTOG. 
 
 Revd. and dear sir. 
 
 WHEN you were last here, my state was a 
 mixture of happiness and distress, I found an 
 entire deliverance from that natural propen- 
 sity to evil which for many years before had 
 beset me, and had the clear testimony of my 
 heart's being cleansed from sin ; but finding 
 many things in myself, which I did no expect 
 in that state, I gave way to fearfulness and 
 unbelief.... 'Till God withdrew this evidence 
 from me, but did not withdraw his grace, his 
 work in my heart was still the same, and 
 sometimes shone by its own light ; but this 
 oould not satisfy, I was often under painful 
 uncertainty concerning my state, I was iix-. 
 deed happy, yet the fear of sin lurking in my 
 heart pained my very soul, I now saw and be-< 
 moaned my loss, and could not be satisfied 'till 
 I had again received the testimony of God*s 
 spirit that my heart was cleansed from sin yet 
 my ignorance and carnal understanding often 
 B 
 
 v; 
 
^ 14 ; 
 
 blocked up the way;... at this time, I became 
 acquainted with a gentleman from Holland, 
 (who was on business in this city) he was a 
 Godly man, and had a deep work of grace 
 wrought on his heart... the Lord did often 
 bless us together, and gave me much light in 
 conversing with him.. .after some time, here- 
 quested I would give him my experience hi 
 writing, which I did not wish to do for two 
 reasons,... first, lest thro' ignorance I should 
 only darken what I attempted to explain, and 
 secondly, if I wrote I must do it honestly, 
 and confess that I had lost the witness of my 
 sanctification, and this might appear to him 
 (who was not clear concerning this work) as 
 tho' I had only deceived myself in the matter, 
 and lessen the work in his eyes.... But he urg- 
 ing the request, and a christian friend with 
 whom I advised recommending me to comply, 
 I reluctantly began the task, leaving the event 
 to God; yet earnestly wrestlingfor the witness; 
 when one day while employed in this business, 
 I w'as struck with a sentence I had just wrote, 
 and enabled to believe, and found in that mo- 
 ment the testimony of God*s spirit, that my 
 heart was cleansed from sin,... since then the 
 
. .oi\\ bus enabled me more than ever, to re 
 c[\:\cc my o"ivn wisdom, and attend more 
 raiply to the teachings of his spirit, which 
 iiables me to go on with more steadiness and 
 omfort...! now see, that I expected many 
 things in a sanctified state, which belong to a 
 ;;lonfied....'i'he servant would be above his 
 ]^ord...yLt it is a blessed state, a glorious li 
 berty, a happy rest, and I find the more confi- 
 dent I am in v/hat my God has done for me, 
 'he more liappy I am. 
 
 I do not see why the people of God should 
 stumble at words which declare his Vv ork ; is 
 It not more pleasing to him, that we should 
 (when called to it) declare to the full c xtent 
 what he has done for us, than out of (false) 
 prudence or discretion hide any part r surely 
 this would not be doing him justice; I would 
 be thankful for your opinion on this ; as also, 
 if there be not as absolute a necessity for press- 
 ing sanctification on believers, as for press- 
 ing justification on penitents....! v/ould also 
 request your judgment concerning other mat- 
 ters, which arc at times made very clear to 
 my mind, yet am afraid to trust to these sud- 
 den illuminations (if I may call them so) lest 
 
( 16 ) 
 
 there should be any degree of my own wis- 
 dom in them ; I desire to be taught of God 
 and you, and indeed by any whom God shall 
 send. 
 
 Is sin (either more or less) some degree of 
 rebellion in the will? and where there is no 
 degree of rebellion in the will, ean there be 
 sin ? 
 
 May there rot be many imperfections, 
 V. here there is no sin ? nay must it not be un- 
 avoidably so, as a consequence of the fall ; our 
 bodies and all their fliculties having suffered 
 greatly by it, and left in a shattered imperfect 
 state, nnd so derecti\e in every part, as leaves 
 us quite incapable of acting, thinking, or judg- 
 ing perfectly right in every thing.... Now are 
 these bv this m.eans become our natural infir- 
 mities, taken up and laid down with the 
 body, Vitii] therefore not inconsistent with an 
 heart cleansed from sin ? 
 
 So long as I find vny \vill wholly given up 
 to, and svrceily lost in the will of God, (not- 
 Withsti.ndirg my many defects,) do I sin ? or 
 rather do not all these things Vvhich before 
 rp])eared a-, inconsistencies vanish as such, 
 and appear to be mere natural infirmitie*-* 
 
( ir ) 
 
 vvhlch ^ve must cany about with us as a 
 mark of our fallen state, as a badge of our po- 
 vcrty, and the consequence of our first pa- 
 rents sin. 
 
 I know not whether I have stated these 
 
 matters right, but requesting you to make 
 
 allowance for my ignorance, and to set me 
 
 right by your opinion and advice. I remain, 
 
 Rev. and dear Sir, 
 
 Kespectfully and Affectionately, 
 Yours in our Lord Jesus. 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER IV. 
 
 Rev. John Wesley. ...to Mrs. Eliza Bennis, 
 
 Manchester, March, 29, 1706. 
 My Dear Sister. 
 
 ONE of our preachers has lately advanced 
 
 fa new position among us,,.. That there is no 
 
 direct or immediate witness of sanctification, 
 
 but only a perception or conscioi^sness, thnt 
 
 B S 
 
( 18 ) '' 
 
 we are changed, filled with love, and cleansed 
 from sin.... But if I understand you right, you 
 find a direct testimony, that you are a child 
 of God. 
 
 Now certainly if God has given you this 
 light, he did not intend that you should hide it 
 under a bushel.... It is good to conceal the se- 
 crets of a king, but it is good to tell the lov- 
 ing kindness of the Lord.... Every one ought 
 to declare what God has done for his soul, and 
 that with all simplicity ; only care is to be ta- 
 ken, to declare to several persons, tbat part 
 of our own experience, which they are seve- 
 rally able to bear, and some parts of it, to such 
 alone as are upright and simple of heart. 
 
 One reason -why those who are saved from 
 sin should freely declare it to believers, is be- 
 cause nothing is a stronger incitement to 
 them, to seek after the same blessing. And 
 we ought by every possible means, to press 
 every serious believer, to forget the things 
 which are behind, and with all earnestness go 
 on to perfection. Indeed if they are not thirst- 
 ing after this, it is scarce possible, to keep 
 what they have ; they can hardly retain any 
 
( 19 ) 
 
 power of faith, if they are not panting after 
 holiness. 
 
 A thousand infirmities are consistent with 
 even the highest degree of holiness ; which is 
 no other than pure love, an heart devoted to 
 God ; one design and one desire.... Then 
 whatever is done either in word or deed, may- 
 be done in the name of the Lord Jesus, 
 Press after all the residue of the promises. 
 
 I am My Dear Sister, 
 
 Your Affectionate Brother, 
 
 JOHN WESLEY- 
 
 LETTER y. 
 
 ?Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev. John Wesley. 
 
 Limerick^ July^ 10. 1766. 
 Dear Sir. 
 
 I RECEIVED yours of 29th. March, 
 wherein you mention that ** one of our 
 preachers has lately advanced a new position; 
 that there is no direct or immediate witness 
 of the work of sanctification, but only a pert 
 
( 20 ; 
 
 ception or consciousness that we are chang- 
 ed.-' 
 
 I believe there is no passing through such a 
 change, without being sensible that a change 
 is VvTOUght ; but how can any know what the 
 grace is which they have been made parta- 
 ker of, without the direct testimony of God's 
 spirit ;... if Satan was bound, so that he should 
 never have power to disturb such souls, then 
 the work wrought on the heart might always 
 be manifest ;...but are there not times when 
 the powers of darkness shew their strenght, 
 do they not often raise a mist in the soul which 
 clouds almost every grace, and then throAvs 
 in a multitude of doubts and questionings into 
 the mind, and in this case is there not need 
 of a direct testimony from God?.., if this be 
 not attainable what shall comfort a soul under 
 such circumstances?.... for my part a state of 
 uncertainty was always painful to me, how- 
 ever happy my soul might be ;.♦. the weight 
 of my corruptions was so grevious, and ray 
 heart so torn on account of inbred bin, that 
 my deliverance was quite clear to me, for I 
 had got into a new world ! I found an entire 
 change;....! had that perceptioji or conscious- 
 
t 21 ) 
 
 ness that I was changed ; but I also found 
 doubts, fears, and questionings, continually 
 cast into my mind, whether sin was really cast 
 out of my heart or not, this doubtful state 
 was exceedingly painful to me ; my heart 
 was broken at the thoughts of sin still sub- 
 sisting, or only subsiding for a time, I could 
 not be satisfied with less than the total exter- 
 pation of it ; this made me cry mightily to 
 God for the witness of his spirit, which he 
 was graciously pleased to grant in such a 
 manner as was very clear to me, and often 
 since in time of grievious temptation I should 
 be ready to give up my confidence were it 
 not for this testimony, which frequently shines 
 indisputably clear, indeed it is such a blessed 
 privilege that I think it a pity all do not seek 
 it, but I believe many are content with being 
 happy without knowing their freedom, I some- 
 times think that these miss many distresses 
 which I have, and do still labour under, yet 
 they also miss the comforts proceeding from 
 this testimony which I think more than equivo- 
 lent,.. indeed I have been asked some ques- 
 tions which appeared to me very oddconcerning 
 these things, but I believe if all the children of 
 
( 2- ) 
 
 God were more simple they would be more 
 wise. 
 
 Dear Sir, I have wrote fi-eeh' according to 
 that measure of light and understanding 
 which I have ; requesting you would shew 
 your love to my soul, by setting rae right 
 u'herein I err ; my ignorance is so great, and 
 my ideas of things so confused that I dare 
 not trust to my own judgment in matters of 
 such importance, this sense of myself, has 
 often occasioned me much distress,... v,hen I 
 have heard these things spoken against, I have 
 been ready to admit the doubt and say, sure 
 this person is more wise more holy than I, 
 and therefore knows more of the mind of God 
 and if it be so I am hitherto all wrong :...and 
 still in such cases after ail that the Lord has 
 done for me, I am too apt to question, being 
 in my self a poor, dark, unstable creature.... 
 But blessed be God for his free grace, through 
 this alone I am what I am, and find every 
 moment the same need of the same grace, 
 my indigence appears every day more and 
 more, and this drives me to my Lord Jesus, 
 and my multiplying necessities makes him 
 still more precious to my soul. O what should 
 
C 23 ) 
 
 1 do without such a Saviour, I find I havt 
 need of all his merit, and would not be saved 
 without it, O it is sweet to be a beggar at his 
 feet, subsisting wholly on his bounty !... my 
 Dear Sir, I request your prayers, I have 
 much need of them,.... mine weak and im- 
 perfect as they are, are daily offered up for 
 you. By 
 Rev. and Dear Sir, 
 Yours in the bonds of Christian affection, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS 
 
 LETTER VI. 
 Rev. John Wesley, to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 Leeds ^ August^ 14. 176G. 
 My Dear Sister. 
 
 ALTHOUGH I am at present exceedingly 
 hurried with various business, yet love con- 
 strains me to write a few lines, your lettei^ 
 are always welcome to me, as the picture of 
 an honest and affectionate heart, 
 
 What you say concerning the witness of 
 the spirit, is agreeable to all sound experi- 
 
( 24 ) 
 
 ence. We may in some measure be satisfied 
 without it, in die time of broad sunshine ; 
 but it is absolutely necessary in the time of 
 clouds, and heaviness and temptation ; other- 
 vvise it would be hardly possible to hold fast 
 your confidence. 
 
 Beware of voluntary humility, even this 
 may create a snare ;...in the *' thoughts on 
 christian perfection", and in the " farther 
 thoughts " you have the genuine experience 
 of the adultchildren of God ; oppose that au- 
 thority, to the authority of any that contradict, 
 ( if reason and scripture are disregarded) and 
 look daily for a deeper and fuller communion 
 with God ; O w hat is it to walk in the light, a 
 he is in the light ! 
 
 Do not cease to pray for 
 
 Your truly affectionate Brother, 
 
 JOHN WESLEY 
 
( 25 J 
 
 LETTER VIL 
 
 ivirs. Eliza Bennis, to the Rev. John \v esle} . 
 
 Limericky Julij^ 15, 1/^67, 
 Dear Sir, 
 
 I have made many attempts to write you> 
 sincey ou left this ; but my state has appeared 
 so confused, that when I have taken up the 
 pen, I knew not where or how to begin ; nor 
 indeed do I now know what to say, though 
 love and gratitude constra^ins me to write. 
 
 Your late visit to this city, proved a great 
 blessing to my soul ; your word w^as accom- 
 panied with power,and enabled me more clear- 
 ly to see the work of God on my heart, yet I 
 cannot say I am satisfied. 
 
 The Lord does give me at times the testi- 
 mony of his spirit, that sin is cast out of my 
 heart, but I feel so much slackness, thought- 
 lesness, unstayedness of mind, forgetfulness, 
 wanderings, and listlesness of soul, that I am 
 ready to question this evidence, even whilst I 
 have it; and from this view of myself, am ready 
 to cry out, how can these things be I indeed it 
 r appears sometimes as a perfect inconsistence, 
 so that I know not what to conclude ; I do 
 not find that measure of life or love which 
 r C 
 
C 26 ; 
 
 I once enjoyed, nor that clearness of sight, oi 
 strength of faith, though at all times I feel my 
 heart wholly given up to God ; yet find also a 
 continual questioning in my mind about it. 
 Indeed I think my experience such a jumble, 
 and feel myself such a poor, dark, blind, igno- 
 rant creature, that I am at times as one bewil- 
 dered, and can only cast myself as I am on the 
 Lord Jesus, taking him alone as my all in all, 
 and beseeching him to point out my way, and 
 not suffer my ignorance to err ; blessed be my 
 God, I do not find any propensity to sin, but 
 do not find that constant breathing after him 
 which I think should belong to the state, and 
 w^hich I have felt in times past; I am often 
 feaiful and distressed on this account, weary 
 of my unprofitableness, and filled with grief 
 and dejection of spirit; and though I find no 
 condemnation froTU God, yet feel a continual 
 dissatisfaction at nayself,... Indeed I find the 
 L,ord Jesus precious, ^^ry precious to mysoul, 
 iand am distressed5because I do ript,cannot ren^ 
 dcr hiin that pbedience which I should, and 
 which he knows I desire to do, 
 
 Dear Sir, I have endeavoured to lay my 
 heart uncovered before you, as the lL*Qrd 
 
aUows I would not appear any thing to }0'., 
 out such as I am in bis sight who knows ali. 
 things, and shall hope for an answer as soor' 
 :s your business will permit. 
 
 I am Dear Sir, your unworthy, 
 
 But truly affectionate^ 
 
 M^Yt J@hft W§§l§yM?l§> Mrs? %\\m Serinis, 
 
 1J?:ar Sister Ben>is. 
 
 When you write to me, you iiave only to 
 ihink aloud, just to- open the windo\v in yo'Ji 
 breast ; when we love one another, there Is i\o 
 need of either disguise or reserve, I \o\QyoUi 
 and I verily believe you love mc: so you havi*. 
 only to write just what you feel. 
 
 The essential part of christian holiness i^ 
 giving the heart whoHy to God, and certainly 
 we need not lose any degree of that light ; and 
 love which at first attend this; it is our own 
 'nfirmity if we do ; it is not the will of the 
 
i.ord concerning us. Your present business is, 
 not to reason whether you should call your 
 f^xperience thus or thus ; but to go straight to 
 bhjj that loves you, with all your wants, how 
 i^reat or how many soever they are. Then 
 ail things are ready ; help while yet you ask is 
 given ! you have only to receive it by simple 
 iliith ; nevertheless you will still be incompas- 
 scd v» ith numberless infirmities j for you live 
 111 an house of clay, and therelbre this corrup- 
 tible body will more or less press down the 
 ^.oul. yet not so as to prevent your rejoic- 
 ing evermore, and having a witness that your 
 heart is all /m; you may claim this, it is yours 
 for Christ is yourg. Believe and feel him 
 
 • » /-> '^ V 
 
 My Dear Sister Adieu, 
 Yours Affectionately, 
 
 JOHN WESLEY. 
 
29 ) 
 
 LETTER JX. 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Btnnis, to the Rev. John V/esIey*. 
 
 Limerick, Maij, 25, 1789. 
 Dear Siu, 
 
 SINCE the Lord first called me by his 
 grace to partake of his mercy, he has given 
 me to esteem and love you as a dear parent ; 
 f)ut my own littleness and your great worth 
 created such an awe in me, as caused me to 
 keep a painful distance, notwithstanding your 
 kind and loving* solicitations to the contrary | 
 (I hope this will not appear as flattery, it is- 
 aideed the truth of my heart) but have nov/ 
 resolved by di\ine assistance, this shall not 
 i^e the case in future. 
 
 Blessed be my God, I have found my soul 
 much quickened by your late visit; but am 
 not satisfied 'till I feel restored all that I have 
 lost, I find many hindrances in pursuing this;, 
 and many plausible reasons why I should not 
 expect it, but my necessities drive me forv/arc! 
 and the mercies ofGod encourage mc at time:; 
 to hope and expect an entire deliverance, but 
 the thought of my own unfaithfi^lness stil" 
 comes between and causes my heart to {liil, 
 ndeed it is just, should I never be restored, 
 C2 
 
( 30 ) 
 
 aiici should I wait all the days of my life, and be 
 saved at the last, surely it would be wonderful 
 mercy ; yet my heart is pained at the thought, 
 I-^vant a present salvation, a heaven within, 
 I want that I should sin no more. 
 
 That every inoment I should feel 
 His love, and know I do his will, 
 Should find no slackness on my part, 
 But praise flow constant from my heart. 
 
 I cannot describe my present state, other- 
 wise than by calling it a mixture of happiness 
 and misery, and must continue to be so, 'till 
 the Lord condescends again to visit with a 
 fresh supply of his grace, this unfaithful back- 
 sliding heart. Indeed whilst I am desiring, 
 longing, and asking for this, 1 am ready to 
 cry out, ** will the Lord mdeca condescend so 
 far;'* O 1 want more faith and more poverty 
 of spirit. 
 
 27th. I feared when you left this for Cork, 
 I should again lose all my earnestness, and 
 sink down where I was before, I have 
 many fears of that kind still, but blessed be 
 my God, it is not the case as yet, my soul 
 is at times all desire and expectation, but my 
 release is not yet come, this morning I found 
 my heart all earnestness in prayer, being de- 
 sirous not to come away 'till the Lord had 
 
( 51 ) 
 
 blessed me, but not finding my expectations 
 answered, I came away much cast down, and 
 opened the bible on Ezekiel 20th chap. 15th 
 verse. ..this threatening I thought appUcable 
 to my state, and suitable to my deserts. 
 
 But I will yet hope, even against hope, 
 perhaps the Lord may be intreated....My Dear 
 Sir, I think if you would pray for me, the 
 Lord would answer. 
 
 29th. Blessed be my God, my soul has been 
 all yesterday and this morning in some degre 
 happy, and still continues so, but not satis- 
 fied ; I want a fuller manifestation of his love, 
 I want to be all as he would have me be, I 
 would make no conditions with him, only 
 that he would give me himself... Amen Lord 
 let me be wholly and only thine. 
 
 The people here seem much stirred up, 
 and happy in the expectation of your returning 
 to us for a few days, I hope you have deter- 
 mined it shall be so; O come, and I fully 
 think you will bring a blessing to your un- 
 worthy, but truly Affectionate, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
LETTKH X, 
 
 "Raw John V/esley...to Mrs Eliza Bennis* 
 
 CorAMuij, 50 y 1769, 
 Dear Sister, 
 
 Some years since, I was mclined to think, 
 chat none who had once enjoyed and then lost 
 the pure love of God, must ever look to enjoy 
 it again, 'till they were just steping into eter- 
 nity.. ..But experience has taught us better 
 things, we have at present numerous instan- 
 ces of those who had cast away that un speak 
 able blessing, and now enjoy it in a larger 
 measure than ev^r ; and why should not this 
 be your case? because you are unworthy r 
 so were they; beqause you have been an un- 
 faithful steward ? so had they been also ; yet 
 God healed them fneely, and so he will jy^w.. 
 only do not reason against him.... Look for no- 
 thing in yourself but sin and un worthiness.... 
 ¥ or gtt yourself.... Worthy is the lamb, and^f 
 has prevailed for youj you shall not die, but 
 live I live all the life of heaven on earth, you 
 need nothing in order to this but faith.. .And 
 who gives this ? he that standeth at the door! 
 
( 33 ) 
 
 I hope to see you at Limerick on Monday 
 next, and I pray, let there never more be any 
 reserve between you, and 
 
 Your truly AfFectionate &c, 
 
 JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 LKTTEE XI. 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennii,..,to the Rev, John Wesley. 
 Limerick July^ 13, Uim 
 
 DEAR SIR, 
 
 I HAVE often thought since you left 
 Limerick, if you did not know me before, you 
 now know me perfectly jail my weakness, 
 ignorance and errors lie open before you ; the 
 Lord knows I desire to appear in your sight 
 what I am in his who knows and sees my 
 heart; yet have been grievously exercised 
 since I put my papers into your hands ; when 
 you asked them I found a satisfaction in 
 gratifying you, but have since been much 
 tempted both to pride and shame ; the exer- 
 cise has often proved a blessing to my soul, 
 and the looking over former experience has 
 
frequently borne me up and strengthened ni^ 
 hands when ready to faint, which makes me 
 still willing to keep them ,• but indeed they 
 were never intended to be even seen by any 
 but myself, and from their many defects do 
 not see how they can be useful to any other,... 
 ds I suppose ypu have by this time looked 
 them Gv^t^ I shall thank you to return them 
 
 by tfm iw§^\m who ym tmy mni ter^ from 
 
 In the mldgt of many t^mptntiong, I defind 
 the Lord my refuge and ^uppmt, md at times 
 am given to iee, that my heart k wholly dedl' 
 eated to him,!,, Yet am almost &miUn}Mly 
 distreised that I do not live more suitable to 
 such, a profession ; not only outwardly but 
 inwardly, I see myself every moment full of 
 flaws, wants and deficiencies ; an inconstancy 
 of mind that causes much grief ; I know this 
 should not be. ...I see it is my privilege to 
 enjoy constant union and communion with 
 God, to live by faith, and rest in his will....! 
 see the happiness of this state, and have had 
 some s\yeet experience of it, and think I can^ 
 not be satisfied 'till I re-attain it; yet while 1 
 thus see it, my privilege and desire, and long- 
 
so after it, I do not grow toward it, I do not 
 enter into it, there is a something in the way, 
 which hinders, and which God only is able to 
 remove, O that he would take it out of the 
 way, that he would totally destroy every thing 
 that opposes his will in my soul. 
 
 Mr. Bourk's visit here, has proved a bless- 
 ing to my soul, and to his also, I hope the 
 Lord will enable him to keep his hold, and 
 stand by faith against every opposition ; he has 
 had some seals to his ministrv since he came 
 here; if you coqld spare him to us this yearj 
 I think it would be productive of good. 
 
 Dear Sir, at present I am exercised iit- 
 wardly by my enemy, and outwardly by the 
 sickness of two of my children, so that 1 have 
 much need of your prayers; through all the 
 Lord does support me, ^nd am confident tliat 
 what is best he will do \ may he continue to be 
 your strength and support, and give you 
 counsel in all your consultations, is the earnest 
 prayer, of your ever Affectionate, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS> 
 
C 56 } 
 
 LETTER XII. 
 
 Rev John Wesley... .to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 Dubiin. July 24, 1769, 
 Dear Sister. 
 
 IF the reading over your papers has no 
 other effect, this it certainly has, it makes me 
 lo\'e you abundantly better than I did before ; 
 I have now a more intimate knowlege of 
 you.... I enter more into your spirit, your 
 tempers, and Hopes, and fears, and desires, all 
 which tends to endear you to me... It is plain, 
 one of your constant enemies and the most 
 dangerous of all, is evil reasoning.... Accord- 
 ingly the thing which you chiefly want is 
 christian simplicity.... Brother Bourke and 
 you should carefully watch over each other in 
 that respect, and let each deal faithfully with 
 the other, let there be no reserve between you 
 encourage one another also, to pray for, and 
 expect the continual and direct witness of the 
 spirit.... They are by no means the best^diVt 
 of our preachers in any sense, who doubt of 
 this : I know but of one who had experienced 
 the work, that doubted concerning the witness 
 namely James Oddie: and I am affraid tlv<^ 
 
 
( 37 ) 
 
 for some time he has experienced neither 
 the one nor the other.... Two of your writ- 
 ten books I send back by that lovely woman 
 Jenny Moore, the third I must borrow a little 
 longer,... My Dear Friend, Remember 
 
 Yours Aifectionately, &c. 
 
 JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 LETTER XIII. 
 Rev. John Wesley.. ..to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 Bristol^ September 18, 1769. 
 
 MY DEAR SISTER, 
 
 I WROTE a longer letter to you than 
 I usually do, before I set out from Dublin, 
 where or how it stopped I cannot imagine. 
 I think of you every day, indeed I do not 
 know that I ever loved you so well as since I 
 was at Limerick last, the more we are ac- 
 quainted with each other, the more we ought 
 ^o love one another. ; 
 
 I hope brother Bourke and you, faith- 
 fully endeavour to help each other on. 
 s your own soul all alive ? All devoted to 
 D 
 
I 
 
 ( 38 ) 
 
 God? Do you find again what you found 
 once ? And are you active for God? Remem- 
 ber you have work to do in your Lord's vin- 
 yard, and the more you help others the more 
 your soul will prosper. I am my Dear Sis- 
 ter. 
 
 Yours Affectionately, he. 
 
 JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 LETTER XiV. 
 Mrs. Eliza 6ennis....to the Rev. John Wesley. 
 Limerick^ October 17, 17o9. 
 
 DEAR SIR, 
 
 AFTER son^e delays occasiom d by un- 
 foreseen circumstances, I have received the 
 two books, and your kind letters from Dublin 
 and Bristol, I want words to express the gra- 
 titude I feel for your love and tender care 
 over me, may God still continue this mercy 
 to a poor unworthy creature; weak and imper- 
 fect as my petitions to the throne of grace are, 
 I cannot cease offering them up for you, whilst 
 I am able to praj for myself. 
 
 As to the state of my soul at present, it 
 
{ 39 ) 
 
 Still continues (as mentioned in a former let- 
 ter) to be a mixture of happiness and distress, 
 I feel my heart given to the Lord, and he 
 knov/s that it is the desire of my soul that his 
 will should be done in me, by me, and upon 
 me, yet I find such deficiencies in c\ ery re- 
 spect us bows me down and hinders my con- 
 stantly rejoicing in him, and am often afraid 
 that I shall perish after all. Can this be con- 
 sistent with perfect love ? I do not feel that 
 measure of happiness and resting in God, 
 which I once did, my soul mourns after it, 
 and cannot be satisfied without it, yet cannot 
 come by faith so as that I may receive it ; 
 when I would, I find my way so closed up, 
 that I cannot get through, and such a feeble- 
 ness of soul that I cannot persist, but sink 
 down again into an inactive sorrow and dis- 
 tress ; the Lord does give me to feel the con- 
 solations of his spirit, and does draw^ my heart 
 after himself; but do not find that total obli- 
 vion of self, that entire sequestration from 
 every earthly thing, that delightful fellowship 
 w^th, and constant enjoyment of God wdiich I 
 once possessed, but lost by my unfaithfulness, 
 
( 40 ) 
 
 O how can I feed those sheep, committed to 
 my care, the charge Hes very heavy on me ; 
 Dear Sir cease not to pray for your unworthy, 
 •diild in Christ. 
 
 ELIZA BENNLS, 
 
 LETTER XV, 
 ^iev. Jf hn Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bcnnis. 
 
 Whitehaven^ April 12, 1770- 
 
 DIAR SISTEK, 
 
 If two or three letters have miscarried all 
 will not, so I am determined to write again. 
 How does the work of God go on at Lime- 
 lick.^ Does the select society meet constant- 
 ly ? And do you speak fieely to each other ? 
 What preachers aie with you noix) ? do you 
 converse frankly and openly with them, with- 
 out any Ihyness or Reserve ? Do you find 
 your own soul prosper .^ Do you hold fast 
 ivhat God had given you .'' Do you give 
 liiim all your heart ? And do you find the w^it- 
 ness of this abiding with you ? One who is 
 now in the house with me, has not lost that 
 witness one moment for these ten years. Why 
 should you lose it any more ? Are not the gifts 
 
( -1 ) , 
 
 of God \oithout repentance ? Is he not willing 
 to give always, what he gives once ? Lay-hold, 
 lay-hold on all the promises. I am, 
 
 Your affectionate Brother. 
 
 JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 LETTER XVI. 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Bcnnis....to the Rev. John vVesley 
 
 W at erf or d. May 20, 1770. 
 
 DEAR SIR^ 
 
 Having come to this city on a vi^it to 
 my daughter, your kind favor of l2di April 
 was forwarded to me from Limerick. Indeed 
 my heart is thankful for your care over, and 
 advice to me ; your kind enquiry concerning 
 my state, fills me with shame and distress 
 when I consider what a dwarf I am amongst 
 the people of God. The Lord does make it 
 the desire of my soul to do his will and 
 knows I ivould be wholly and entirely his, but 
 feel many hindrances, which nothing but his 
 all powerful grace can remove, these bear me 
 down, and keep me continually loaded with 
 D 2 
 
C 42 j 
 
 distress. O when shall my complainings end. 
 I know assuredly that it is the privilege of 
 God's people to have and retain the testimony 
 of his spirit, and think it cannot be otherwise 
 in the nature of things ; that I find it clouded 
 is owing to my own disobedience and unbe- 
 lief, and is indeed a cause of sorrow to me, at 
 times I have strong hopes that the Lord will 
 reviv^his work in my soul, at other times 
 have girevous fears and dejections, and am 
 leady to give up all hope ; I have been parti- 
 cularly exercised in this manner since I came 
 to this city ; my own unfaithfulness so placed 
 in view, and such severe reproaches for my 
 baseness, as has caused sore and bitter repen- 
 tance ; oh that it would last, that I could 
 " weep my life away, for having grieved his 
 '- love." 
 
 But I am such a poor unstable creature, that 
 even this does not last, but like the natural 
 man beholding his face in a glass. I quickly 
 forget until the Lord again reminds me of my 
 state. 
 
 Brother Saunderson is now in Limerick, 
 the select band meet regular, and a few have 
 been lately added to jt, they speak open and 
 
( 43 •; 
 
 free but mostly in a complaining state. I have 
 conversed freely with brother S. and do now 
 correspond with him (he seems athirst for 
 sanctification) but I think I discern self in all 
 I do and say, and this discourages my for- 
 wardness in speaking to others, and generally 
 fills me with after distress, brother Bourke is 
 on this circuit, the people here go on at a poor 
 rate, nor do I think it likely to be otherwise 
 until they have a stationed preacher, they 
 desired me to mention this, and ^vould thank 
 you to think of them, as I shall return home 
 in a few days, you will please direct your next 
 to Limerick. 
 
 I am dear Sir, &c. 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER XVIL 
 Rev. John Wesley.. .to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 2arw, June 13, 1770, 
 
 MY DEAR SISTER, 
 
 JUST Now we have many persons all over 
 England, that arc exactly in the state you de- 
 scribe ; they were some time since renewed 
 in love, and did then rejoice evermore ; but 
 after a few years, months or weeks, they were 
 
( 44 ) 
 
 moved from their stedrastr.ess, yet several oi 
 these, have vvithin a fc\v irior.ih^ recovered all 
 they had lost, and some wkh increase, being 
 far more established than ever they were be- 
 fore, and why may it not be so withjcw? The 
 rather, because you do not deny, or doubt of 
 the work whicli God did work in you; and 
 that bv simple faith. Surelv vou shoukl be 
 
 ^ A .1 ml 
 
 every day expecting the same free gift. And 
 he will not deceive your hope. 
 
 But how is this with respect to Waterford: 
 They woukl, and they woukl not, I sent t\\ o 
 preachers to that circuit, why did not they 
 keep them ? W. L. wrote word that there 
 was neither employment nor maintenance for 
 two, and therefore wished leave to return 
 to England. Let me hear more Crom you on 
 this matter. 
 
 If you can guard brother S. against pride, 
 and the applause of well rneaning people, he 
 will be a happy man, and an useful labourer. 
 I hope brother M. has not grown cold. Stir 
 up the gift of God which is in you ! 1 am. 
 My dear sister. 
 
 Your Affectionate Brother, 
 
 JOHN WESLEY. 
 
( 45 ) 
 
 LETTER XVIII. 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis....to the Rev. John Wesley 
 
 Limerick, Julij 8, 1770. 
 My Dear Sir 
 
 YOUR Letters always bring encourage- 
 ment, I rejoice to hear that many have again 
 recovered their strength ; and at times am 
 enabled to hope it may be my case ; but am 
 often cast down and ready to doubt, from the 
 great unfitness I find in myself. I feel it the 
 desire of my soul to be wholly given up to the 
 Lord, yet do not find my mind so clear con- 
 cerning the work of sanctification as it has 
 been. Neither does the necessity of it appear 
 in the manner it used to do. And yet my 
 soul is reaching after a something, without 
 coming to any particular point, only this, that 
 I want more of God ; I feel happy, yet feel 
 a void which nothing but God can fill. The 
 intercourse is open, but have not that full 
 clear vision, that immediate, intimate, open 
 access which I have had in time past, there 
 is a mist between, which my sight cannot 
 penetrate. I cannot help sighing after for- 
 mer experience, but have not that earnestness 
 of soul, that might bring the blessing near. 
 
( -*^ ) 
 
 But why should I not also acknowledge 
 the goodness of my God. 
 
 He does make himself the desire of my 
 soul, and I find his love to be belter than 
 life ; I am nothing, I have nothing, I desire to 
 be nothing ; but He is my all in all ; and for 
 him I give up eveiy other good ; taking him 
 alone for my portion and my inheritance in 
 time and in all eternity. He knows I fear 
 nothing so much, as a seperation from him, 
 and desire nothing so much as an establish- 
 ment in his grace, so as never more to offend 
 him. O that he would bind my heart to him- 
 self forever. Sisters P. and B. have lately 
 been taken home ; they both died triumphant- 
 ly rejoicing in God their Saviour, and have 
 left a clear testimony that the religion of Jesus 
 is not a cunningly devised fable. 
 
 I believe brother L : met with trials' in Wa- 
 terford, the people are poor and think the ex- 
 pence of a preachers Horse (and family) more 
 than they can well bear, but if it were possi- 
 ble to let them have a single preacher resident 
 in the city, or even to exchange monthly with 
 the circuit preacher (without throwing any of 
 the Horse expence on them) I think it might 
 
( 47 ) 
 
 answer a good end, as yet the circuit is best 
 able to bear expence, indeed I feel much for 
 the city society, a handful of poor simple souls 
 that need every support, and encouragement. 
 Dear Sir, 1 hope you will not think me too 
 presumptuous, in dictating, but I find my 
 soul knit to these poor sheep. 
 
 Sister Ann S : is lately married to brother 
 L : of Clonmell, brother Bourke and I made 
 up this match, and think it is the Lord's doing; 
 she is as usual all alive to God, and I trust 
 will be a means of saving his soul : brother 
 Bourke at my request has taken Clonmell into 
 the circuit, and doubt not but there will be 
 good done there, but as this has caused an 
 entire alteration in the circuit from the former 
 plan, I have to request your forgiveness for 
 'my officiousness, if you disapprove it can be 
 re-altcred, I am dear Sir, 
 
 Your sincerely affectionate, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
( ^8 ; 
 
 LETTER XIX 
 Rev. John Wesley...io Mrs. Eliza Bennis, 
 
 Ashby.jfuly 27, 1770. 
 
 DEAR SISTER, 
 
 WILL You ever find in yourself any- 
 thing but unfitness ? Otherwise your salvation 
 would be of works, not of grace. But you 
 are frequently sick of a bad disease, ei)il reason- 
 ing ; which hinders both your holiness and 
 happiness, you want the true christian simpli- 
 city, which is indeed the highest wisdom. 
 Nothing is more clear according to the plain 
 bible account, than sanctification ; pure love 
 reigning in the heart and life. And nothing 
 is more plain, than the necessity of this, in 
 order to feel happiness here and hereafter. 
 Check all reasoning concerning these first 
 principles, else you will exceedingly darken 
 your soul, and go on denying yourself, and 
 taking up your cross, until you 
 
 " Sink into Perfections Height. 
 •* The debth of huiuble Love." 
 
 If the preachers on Waterford circuit had 
 punctually adhered to the plan which 1 fixed, 
 the horse would have been no burden, but 
 
( ^y ; 
 
 the misfortune is... every dunce is wiser than 
 me, however at your desire I will send a se- 
 cond preacher into the circuit alter confe- 
 rence, but the preachers must change regu- 
 larly, it would never do, to let one man sit 
 down for six months with a small society, he 
 w^ould soon preach hin^self and them as life- 
 less as stones. Your alteration of the cir- 
 cuit so as to take in poor dead Clonmell I 
 much approve, and hope sister L : will be 
 made a blessing to the few there. I rejoice 
 at sisters P. and B's happy release.... I3 not 
 this worth living for ! 
 
 Still draw near to the fountain by simple 
 faith, and take all you want, but be not sloth- 
 ful in your Lords vineyard. 
 
 My Dear Sister, yours affectionately 
 JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 LETTER XX. 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Ben'-iis...to the Rev. John \\\sl!i) . 
 
 IFaterfordj Maij^ 7* 1771. 
 l>fcAR SIR, 
 
 I THINK all my expectations are only 
 ^rom the Lord ; nor do I desire any blessing 
 
 V. 
 
( 50 ) 
 
 which does not borne immediately from his 
 hand ; I purposed to myself much happiiiess 
 in seeing you here, and think my expectations 
 were not from man. Then how shall I ac- 
 count for the deadness and heaviness of soul 
 which I laboured under \\ hilst you were here : 
 but since then have found the Lord parti- 
 cularly gracious. This has caused some jeal- 
 ousy over myself. I fear I do not know my- 
 self aright, and am often fearful least I should 
 judge too fav^ourably of myself, that is, least 
 I should imagine I had received that grace 
 which I have not received ; the Lord 
 knows I would not deceive myself; and bles- 
 sed be his name he does give me to see con- 
 tinually that I am nothing, that I am behold- 
 en to his free grace for all things ; that I can- 
 not keep myself one moment without his 
 special mercy. Nor indeed do I desire to 
 be kept without him ; I find it my sweetest, 
 my most delightful experience to be poor 
 and destitute in myself, subsisting \^'holIy on 
 his bounty, and at times do feel r^ysclf, even 
 as water spilled belore him, and yet how many 
 thousand things do I find in me continually, 
 which seem contradictory to this, and which 
 
C ^^ ) 
 
 cause difficulties and perplexities in my mind 
 tliat none but God can clear. Yesterday I 
 corrected my little child in a hasty manner, 
 my spirit being agitated and angry at the 
 child ; my heart smote me immediately, I 
 %vas grieved and distressed, and thought 
 '^surely in vain do I profess to be cleansed 
 from sin, for thus am I overcome continual- 
 ly," showers of accusations came in upon 
 me, and I had no defence to make, in this 
 state I \^ ent to prayer, and acknowledged my 
 transgression in much deadness cuid heavi- 
 ness, vrhich as a c^otid fell instantly upon 
 me, when the Lord was pleased to visit my 
 soul, and gave me the testimony of liis spirit, 
 that I had not siuned. I was struck with 
 surprise and cried *^how can this be'M I looked 
 for condemnation, but found none, my heav- 
 iness of soul was gone, and the Lord did pour 
 into my heart the sweet refreshings of his 
 love. Indeed it is still surprising to me, for 
 I think I was angry at the child, but would 
 be glad of your judgment and advice, for 
 tliere is a constant fear over me, least I should 
 deceive myself. 
 
( 52 ) 
 
 I do find the Lord very gracious, and 
 wcndcr at his love, O surely it is all free 
 grace. 
 
 8th, I just now received a satisfactoiy letter 
 from brother S : he says he wrote to you, the 
 Lord has begun a great revival in Dublin, 
 and trust he will carry it on. O tiiat he 
 w^ould do so here also. Since you left this, 
 brother C : lias preached regularly, his heart 
 seems earnest for the work and people of God 
 The day you left town, I met the womcns 
 bunds, the Lord did vronderfuUy bless us to- 
 gether, and 1 find w.y heart closely united to 
 them ; last .Monday I v/ent lo^the room, but 
 none of them came ; I do lind it a heavy ^.rocs. 
 yet by the grace of God shall take it up. 1 
 know he can, and often does, ivork with the 
 weakest instrument; though at times it seems 
 next to impossible that the Lord should ever 
 do any thing by me. 
 
 9th, My dear sir I have simply wrote you 
 the workings of my mind, I know you will 
 bear with me, I have had so many proofs of 
 your love thut I cannot doubt it, may the 
 Lord prosper } our labours, and make your 
 visit to Limerick a blessing to his little flock, 
 
C 53 ) 
 
 indeed my heart aches when I lliirik of your 
 being there, and I at such a distance ; for 
 though I am sensible of your kindness and 
 thankful to you, for affording me so much of 
 your company when here; yet I think I had 
 not that satisfaction with you, which I woukl 
 have in Limerick. But I am enabled to look 
 upon every hinderance as well as every help, 
 as coming immediately from the Lord, and 
 equally serviceable to me, O shall I say pray 
 for me, I hope the Lord, does sometimes 
 bring even me to your remembrance, my love 
 to the select band, I hope they remember me 
 when they meet. I am my dear Sir. 
 
 Your Sincerely Affectionate, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER XXL 
 
 Rev. John Wesley. ...to Mrs. Eliza Bcnnls. 
 
 Limerick^ May^ 15. 1771. 
 My Dear Sister. 
 
 WHENEVER There is a dependence, 
 though frequently secret and unobserved, oa 
 any outward thing, it is the mercy of God 
 E 2 
 
( 54 ) ♦ 
 
 w'^Vh disappoints us of our hope, tfiat \vt 
 may be more sensibly convinced '' Neither is 
 ** he that planteth any things nor he that iva- 
 '^ tei'eth, but God th at giveth the increase.'*'* 
 
 From time to time you must find many 
 difficulties and perplexities, that none but God 
 can clear. But can he clear them ? That is 
 enough. Then he surely will. This is the 
 very use of that anointing which we have 
 from God. It is to teach us of all things^ to 
 clear up a thousand doubts, and perplexities 
 ^vhich no human wisdom could do, this was 
 ^^ivcn you in the case of your child, and 
 when that came, temptation spake not again. 
 This is never more needful than with regard 
 to anger; because there is an anger which is 
 not sinful, a disgust at sin, which is often at- 
 tended with much commotion of the animal 
 spirits ; and I doubt whether we can well dis- 
 tinguish this from sinful anger, but by that 
 light from Heaven. 
 
 I really hope J. C. will do well, within tliese 
 two years he is improved exceedingly^ 
 
 If our sisters miss you any more, there is but 
 one way ; you must go or send after them. Be 
 not idle, neither give way to voluntary humi 
 
' ( 55 ) 
 
 lity. You was not sent to Waterford for no- 
 thing; but to ** strengthen the things that re- 
 '' main" 
 
 It would be a strange thing, if I should pass 
 a day without praying for you; by this means 
 at least \\'e may reach each other, and there 
 may be a still increasing union between you 
 and 
 
 Your Affectionate Brother, 
 
 JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 LETTER XXII. 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis....to the Revd.John Wesley. 
 
 Waterford, July r, 1771. 
 Dear Sir, 
 
 THERE Has been no material alteration 
 here since my last. Mr. Newel paid one visit 
 to this city, and Mr Breden three, in the in- 
 terims brother C. acts as usual, and I think 
 whilst they have him, they can feel no lack, I 
 have had some opportunities of conversing 
 with him, for which I have reason to be 
 thankful, the cause and people of God arc very 
 dear to him, and he loves you as his father, 
 I have heard some object to his opinions, but 
 I think his manner of manageing them is such, 
 
( 56 ) 
 
 that they do no hurt to him or the people. I 
 spoke freely to him on this head, and find he 
 entirely agrees with you, as to the essential 
 doctrines of justification and sanctification. 
 He holds election but not reprob-^stion, he 
 believes that God is willing to save all, and 
 that those whom he saves cannot finally fall. 
 This doctrine he says brings great comfort to 
 his soul, but as it might not have the same ef- 
 fect on others, he does not advance it, lest 
 any should rest in it. 
 
 Mr. T. comes on Sundays to hear, and is 
 at times so affected, as to run out of the house, 
 not being able to contain his voice; but his 
 convictions do not last the week out, he keeps 
 such close acquaintance with his former anti- 
 nomian intimates, that his stings of consci- 
 ence are quickly gone, until the next Sunday; 
 then again torn under the word, and again 
 careless; yet so rivited to those Antinomian 
 professors that I fear it will all come to 
 nothing. I meet the womens bands regular, 
 and we generally have an happy hour. 
 
 I thank my God, I have found him very 
 gracious since I c;,me to this city, he has af- 
 forded me such helps, as I did not expect, and 
 
C 57 ) 
 
 lias been himself to me instead of every help, 
 O what cause have I to praise his name and 
 record his dealings with me, it is now two and 
 twenty years since he first made known his 
 pardoning mercy to my soul ; and O what 
 have my eyes seen and my soul experienced in 
 that time ! I am astonished at the sight, and 
 ashamed at my own baseness. O surely there 
 is not such an other worthless creature 
 existing; so backward, so unsteady, such a 
 dwarf amongst his people I I am not at all sa- 
 tisfied v/ith myself. But at times am sup- 
 ported with sweet expectations that my God 
 will rectify all, will remove every hindrance, 
 supplyevery want,and stay my mindcontinually 
 on himself. Indeed I am w'cary of the constant 
 wanderings of my hear t, and deadness of my 
 afiections. The Lord only, knows what I 
 suffer on this account, and the question is con- 
 tinually on my mind " Can this be consistent 
 with an heart cleansed from sin" the Lord 
 knows it is the most anxious desire off my 
 soul, to be all as he would have me be; O 
 that he would w^ork his own will, and make me 
 such. I am just returned from a general class 
 meeting, %nd Mr. T. was there, for the fir^ 
 
( 58 ) 
 
 time these six mojitlisjie seems in earnest, the 
 Lord grant him steadiness and resolution. O 
 may the Good Lord whom you serve prosper 
 your labours, and give you the desire of your 
 soul, is the earnest prayer of, 
 
 Dear Sir, Yours &c. 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS 
 
 LETTER XXIIL 
 Rev. John Wesley.-.to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 Dublin, yuhj^ 80,17: 
 
 MY DEAft SISTER. 
 
 t 
 
 I AM much pleased to hear so good an 
 accountof J. C. If 1 vvas resolved to understand 
 all Gods dispensations, I should embrace his 
 opinion; because it in a manner accounts for 
 some things which otherwise are unac- 
 countable. But thisi do not expect : I am 
 content to understand exceeding little, while 
 I am in the body,.,. What He does, I know- 
 not now ; it is enough, that I shall know- 
 hereafter. Qur business jjoiv is to love and 
 obey, knowledsre is reserved for eternity. 
 
( S9 ) 
 
 My chief objection to Miltons doctrine of 
 election is, tliat I cannot reconcile it to the 
 words of St. Peter which manifestly refer to the 
 eternal state of men ' '' God is no respecter 
 of persons.'''* Now how can we allow this, 
 if we believe he places one man, as it were 
 suspended between heaven and hell, while 
 he fixes anotlier e'er ever he is born, under an 
 absolute impossibility of missing heaven ? 
 
 I am well pleased you see some reason to 
 hope well of Mr. T, speak close to him. He 
 has u strong cultivated understanding, and 
 would make a shining christian. If he con- 
 tinues serious, he will not long be pleased 
 with his former company, they will grow 
 tasteless, nay irksome. 
 
 It is not material whether this or that in- 
 firmity or defect, be consistant with this xx^ 
 that gift of God. Without reasoning about 
 this, it is your part simply to spread all your 
 wants before him who loves you, and he will 
 richly supply them all ! 
 
 Your ever Affectionate Brodier, 
 
 JOHN WESLEY 
 
( 60 ; 
 
 LETTER XXIV. 
 
 Mrs. Eliza 3enms...to the Rev. John Wesle 
 
 Limerick October 15. 1771. 
 
 DEAR SIR. 
 
 WHEN I consider the many privi leges 
 I enjoy, and this not the least, that I can freely 
 unbosom myself to you ; I am lost in wonder 
 and gratitude before the Lord. O surely I 
 have cause to say, Lord what am I, that thou 
 dost deal thus mercifully and bountifully with 
 such a worthless worm." Indeed at present 
 every thing around me contributes to increase 
 my thankfulness and astonishment; the 
 world is running mad after amusement, filling 
 their bellies with the east wind. At present 
 horse racing is here the business of the day, 
 (and the multitude wonders aftej the beasts) 
 and balls, plays, and taverns, the drudgery of 
 the night. My heart is pained to see the 
 poor mistaken croud weary and fatigued to 
 tojdeath with restless days and sleepless nights, 
 search of happiness where rt cannot be 
 found. But when I ask, *'why am I not 
 amongst them?" v.hy am I particularized^ 
 
: -^ ) 
 
 made one of that little flock to whom it is our 
 Fathers good pleasure to give the kingdom? 
 my Dear Sir, who can answer this question f 
 I never could one moment believe that God 
 had confined his mercy to a certain number ; 
 or unconditionally elected some, and left the 
 rest to shift for themselves. Yet when I con- 
 sider the particular dealings of God with my 
 soul, there is something in it (to me) as in- 
 comprehensible as the Deity itself, and 
 which I suppose I shall never understand at 
 this side eternity. Indeed I am often obliged 
 to withdraw my mind from the contempla- 
 tion of it, and at a distance to admire and 
 adore what I cannot comprehend ! 
 
 Since my last, I have been closely exercis- 
 ed by trials from w^ithout and temptations 
 from within, and at times found them as much 
 as I could bear, being so suited to my natu!al 
 disposition as to make them come with the 
 greater force. So that I have sometimes been 
 ready to say '' why does the Lord deal thus 
 with me," I could at times see it was the wor* 
 of the enemy, but not at all times,' ' Indeed 
 my greatest sufferings were my fears least 1 had', 
 ro should, offend my God, and frequently these 
 F 
 
( 62 :) 
 
 were attended even with terror and dismay, 
 which sunk my spirits very much, and caused 
 continual questioninj^s concerning my state, 
 that text ; '* Perfect loi:e castetb out fear'* w^as 
 often brought against me ; at limes a ray of 
 hope supported my soul when ready to sink, 
 and kept me from giving up my profession 
 of sanctification ; for this is what the enemy 
 aimed particularly to wrest from me; one day 
 at prayer, being grievously distressed at the 
 sight of myself, and not able to conclude con- 
 cerning my state I simply told my distress 
 to the Lord, beseeching him to answer for 
 himself; indeed he did put words into my 
 mouth to plead with him, and gave me so clear 
 a testimony of his work on my heart, as 
 answered all doubts, and enabled me to pur- 
 sue my way w ith more courage ; this was a 
 trying time, and continued long, but I found 
 it was good, and know it was permited in 
 love. The Lord has now granted me a cessa- 
 tion, and my soul enjoys a calm settled peace. 
 I see my nothingness, my extreme poverty ^ 
 my numberless deficiencies; and find the 
 Lord Jesus my great, full, rich supply ; and 
 enabled to see clearly his work on my 
 
( 63 ) 
 
 heart, notwlthiJtanding many seeming contra- 
 dictions. The inconstancy of my mind is a 
 continual cause of grief to me, O that he would 
 enable me to walk more evenly before him. 
 Brother Heme and family leave town tomor- 
 row, he was much blessed here, and has left 
 an increase of sixteen to the society, he is in- 
 deed a good upright faithful labourer ; his 
 \vife finding the affairs of the society much 
 embarrassed, refused the usual subsistence, 
 and supported herself and children by work- 
 ing at her trade v.hile here, tho* she had a 
 young child at the breast. Mr. C. has arriv- 
 ed, we do not doubt his abilities and good 
 qualities, but we are rather cast dovvU by 
 having an other married preacher widi a 
 
 I young family sent to us before we cculd 
 recruit our fmances ; we a now owe a heavv 
 debt, and the Vvcekly collections are not 
 equal to the weekly expences, the bulk of 
 the society are poor, so that the weight lies 
 on a few, who are wiling, and do contribute 
 to answer the present expences. But the 
 debt still lies. Could we not have a singly 
 
 \ preacher at least every other year 'till we are 
 It of debt. Your sincerely affectionate, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
' 64 ) 
 
 LETTER XXV. 
 Hev. John V/esley....to Mrs. Elizu Bermis. 
 
 Rye, October 28, 1771. 
 
 II y DEAR SISTER., 
 
 IT Is no wonder that finite cannot mea- 
 sure Infinite. That man cannot comprehend 
 the ways of God. There ahvays will be some- 
 thing incomprehensible. Som.ething like him- 
 self in all his dispensations, we must therefore 
 be content to be ignorant, until eternity opens 
 our understanding, particularly with regard to 
 the reasons of his acting this or tbus. These 
 we shall be acquainted with when in Abra- 
 hams besom. 
 
 As thinking is the act of an embodied spi- 
 rit) playing upon a set of material keys, it is 
 Kot strange, that tlie soul can make but ill 
 music, when her instrument is out of tune. 
 '""his is frequently the case withyou. 
 
 And the trouble and anxiety you then feel, 
 are a natural effect of the disordered machine ; 
 which proportionably disorders the mind* 
 But this is not all, as long as you have to wres- 
 tle not only with flesh and blood, but with 
 principalities and powers, wise as well as po^- 
 erjul, will they not serve themselves of every 
 bodily weakness, to increase the distress of 
 
( 65 ) 
 
 ihesoul ? But let them do as they may: let our 
 frail bodies concur with su'ode and malicious 
 spirits! yet see that you cast not away your 
 confidence wliich hath great recompense of re- 
 ward, '' be strong in the Lord^ and in the pow- 
 er of his might'''' whereunto you have attained, 
 hold fast! and when you feel the roughest and 
 strongest assault, when the enemy comes in 
 like a flood, do not reason, do not (in one 
 sense) Jight with him, but sink down in the 
 presence of your Lord, and simply lookup! 
 telling him; '* Lord, I cannot help myself, I 
 have neither wisdom nor strength for this 
 war, but I am thine, I am all thine! under 
 take for me. Let none pluck me out of thine 
 hands ! keep that safe which is committed to 
 thee, and preserve it unto that day.'^ 
 
 I am in great hopes, if we live until an 
 other conference. L C, will be useful as 
 a travelling preacher, so would J. M. if he 
 had courage to break through. However I 
 am pleased he exercises himself a litte, en- 
 courage him.; I wish you would lend Mrs. 
 Dawson the appeals; take them from the book 
 room, and present them to her in my name, 
 go yourself, for I wish you to be acquainted 
 •with her. I believe they will satisfy her about 
 F 2 
 
66 
 
 the church; she halts just as i did many 
 years ago. Be not shy towards brother Col- 
 iins, he is an upright man. Sister L. is al- 
 ready doing good in Cionmell, do you cor- 
 respond with her.? Your Affectionate, 
 JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 LETTER. XXVL 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis,...to the Rev. John Wesley. 
 Limerick November 14, 1771. 
 
 DEAR SIR, 
 
 I am truly thankful for your last favour, it 
 has proved indeed a blessing to my soul, O 
 ma}- 1 be grateful for every help my merciful 
 God aiibrds. I do in some degree Und my 
 soul prosper, I know the Lord has taken the 
 bent of back- sliding out of my heart, and do 
 find it my settled purpose to cleave to him, 
 and follow^ him wheresoever he shall lead me, 
 but O I want to live more close to him, more 
 entirely devoted to his will. I have often admir- 
 ed that expression, of the apostles. *' Not I 
 Ihe^' this is what I want to experience. That 
 death of self, that may enable me also to say 
 '' Not I live^^ indeed the trials I meet with 
 from this /, makes me long for that happy 
 period. Lam Dear Sir Sec. 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
( 67 ; 
 
 LETTER XXVri. 
 Rev John Wesley.... to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 Canterbury December 3, 1771. 
 
 MY DEAR SISTER, 
 
 I Did believe brother Collins would be of 
 use to you, and you may be of use to him, 
 speak to each other without reserve, and then 
 you will seldom meet in vain. Thrust him out 
 to visit the whole society, (not only those that 
 can give him meat aud drink) from house to 
 house, according to the plan laid down in the 
 minutes of conference ; then he will soon see 
 the fruit of his labour, I hope he is not asham- 
 ed to preach Full sahation receivable now by 
 faith. This is the word which God will al- 
 ways bless, and which the devil peculiarly 
 hates. Therefore he is constantly stiring up 
 both his own children and the weak children 
 of God against it. 
 
 All that God has already given you, hold 
 fast. But expect to see greater things than 
 these. Your affectionate J. Wesley. 
 
 LETTER XXVIIL 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis, to the Rev. John Wesley. 
 
 'Limerick^ March^ 17, 1772. 
 Dear Sir, 
 
 SINCE My last to you, I have had some 
 
 opportunities of conversing with Mrs. D. in 
 
( 68 ) 
 
 her I see what I have often thought; that God 
 has his hiden ones unknown to the world, 
 even among the rich and great, and surely she 
 is one of them, she has living faith, and a 
 tender feeling of her corruptions, but cannot 
 yet comprehend a total deliverance from them. 
 But O my ignorance ! what shall I do with her. 
 
 The select band in particular, and the soci- 
 ety in general are much stirred up since bro- 
 ther C came here; he appointed several days 
 of fasting and prayer for the revival of the 
 work of God, and these were happy, blessed, 
 seasons indeed, the class meetings are lively, 
 the prayer meetings through the city are reviv- 
 ed, the public congregation is in general much 
 larger, and a deeper seriousness and spirit of 
 enquiry observable on outward hearers. I 
 think brother G. will also be made a blessing, 
 you sent him just in time, he preaches a full 
 and present salvation, and is liked by all. 
 
 Mr. T. of Waterford, seems now in ear- 
 nest, I have had two letters from him, he 
 has bought a horse for brother C. and sent 
 him out on the circuit, he has joined the soci- 
 ety, and prays at the prayer meetings. God 
 
 tloes graciously throw in a rich person here 
 
( 69 ) 
 
 and there, to bear the needful expences of his 
 poor followers. 
 
 As to my own state, every day brings new 
 trials, and satan does dispute every inch of 
 ground with me, but through the infinite 
 mercy of my God, I am preserved,- so far as 
 I know of my own heart it is wholly devoted 
 to his will, yet many things arise which ap- 
 pear contradictory to this, and causes much 
 pain, at times I do find a testimony from God 
 that my heart is cleansed from sin; but I 
 want the abiding witness. Indeed I want a 
 steady faith ; the constant sight I have of my- 
 self, keeps me continually disputing ; perhaps 
 the Lord sees it needfull to keep me down, 
 that I may seek my all in him. O may he 
 perfect his work in my soul, by whatever 
 means he sees fit. Dear Sir cease not to pray 
 for..,. your affectionate child in Christ Jesus, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS 
 
( ro ) 
 
 LETTER XXIX. 
 
 Rev. John Wesley.. .to jSIrs. Eliza Beniiis. 
 
 Liverpool, March 31, 1712. 
 Dear Sister. 
 
 YOU did well to break through and con- 
 verse with Mrs. D. there is no doubt but she 
 has living faith, but not having opportunity to 
 converse with believers, she cannot express 
 herself u ith that clearness that our friends do ; 
 cultivate the acquaintance. Noii\ lay before 
 her by way^ of promise the whole christian 
 salvation, she will quickly see ihe desirable- 
 ness of it, you may then lend her. The ** plain 
 account of christian perfection" she will not 
 be frightened, but rather encoui-aged, at hear- 
 ing it is possible to attain what her heart longs 
 for. While you are thus feeding God*s lambs, 
 he will lead you into rich pastures. 
 
 I do not wonder you should meet with 
 trials ; it is by these your faith is made per- 
 fect. You will find many things both in your 
 heart and in jour life contrar}' to the perfection 
 of the Adamic law, but it does not follow that 
 they are contrary to the law of love, kt this 
 fill your heart, and it is enough, still continue 
 active for God, remember a talent is intrusted 
 
( n ; 
 
 to you, see that you improve it, he does not 
 like a slothful steward. 
 
 Your Affectionate Brother 
 JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 LETTER XXX. 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis....to the Rev. John Wesley. 
 
 Limerick^ Maij 26, 1772. 
 
 DEAR SIR, 
 
 SHORTLY After my last, Mrs. D. her 
 husband and the children, were visited with 
 sickness, this affliction has been made a bles- 
 sing to her, she is now preparing to go to the 
 salt water, and I go immediately to Waterford 
 (where I shall expect your next). Our soci- 
 ety is in a happy prosperous situation, the 
 Lord sent a blessing by Mr. C. and has se- 
 conded it by Mr. G. there are several aded, 
 some converted, and some made perfect in 
 love, the conversions are deep and solid, and 
 chiefly amongst the young men, three of 
 whom are aded to the select band, Mr. G's, 
 deportment has gained him the hearts of all, 
 and his manner of enforcing holiness makes it 
 desirable even to its opposers. Indeed we 
 now feed on the sincere milk of the word.... 
 
( 72 ) 
 
 that sower of discord J. D. is expected here ! 
 may God frustrate his coming, or the evil 
 which I dread from his visit, his conduct to 
 brothers G. and H. was so inconsistent, and I 
 saw such mischief likely to proceed from it, 
 that at my instance they lay the whole before 
 you, (which I now inclose) in cases which so 
 materially affect the church of Christ, and the 
 evils resulting from which, you may prevent, 
 the wounding your feelings must be made a 
 secondary matter ; God knows I would not 
 wound them by this or any other disagreeable 
 information, did I not think it much more 
 a breach of duty to screen these circumstances 
 jfrom you. 
 
 As to myself. I thank God my soul is hap- 
 py,the Lord is pleased to make himself the de- 
 sire of my heart, and it does as by a natural 
 propensity cleave to him. I certainly do find 
 many things both in my heart and life contra- 
 ry to the perfection of the Adamic law: but are 
 they not also contrary to the law of love ? and 
 I have been told that every breach of that law 
 is sin. How shall we reconcile that with St. 
 John? \i e'-oery wandering thought, cDery for- 
 
( rs ) 
 
 getful interval is a breach of that law, and 
 every breach is sin! how is it that they who arc 
 born of God sineth not? There has been so 
 much said to me lately on this head, that I 
 would be thankful for your thoughts on it, and 
 posithely what sin is. I request this, not so 
 much for my own' sake, as for the sake of 
 others. I am Dear Sir &c. 
 
 ELIZA BEN!<FIS. 
 
 LETTER XXXr. 
 Rev. John Wesley. ..to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 7'arm, June 16, 1772. 
 KY Dear Sister, 
 
 AS Often as you can, I request you will 
 converse personally or by letter with Mrs. D. 
 her heart is much united to you, and I believe 
 you are particularly called to be useful to 
 those whom the riches or the grandeur of 
 this world, keep at a distance from the pure 
 word of God.... V/hen you are at Water- 
 ford, see that you be not idle there. You 
 should gather up, and meet a band immedi- 
 ately. If you would also meet a class or two 
 it would be so much the better, you know, 
 the noore labour, the more blessing. You 
 'lid well to send me the last inclosure. it »« 
 G 
 
7m^ 
 
 absolutely needful I should be acquainted with 
 all such matters.... the contrary would be 
 false delicacy. I have written to Limerick 
 if J. D. should go there in the same spirit 
 wherein he has been for some time, to take 
 care that he do no mischief. If he should 
 proceed in that impetuous manner, we shall 
 be obliged to take harsher measures. This 
 I should be sorry* for ; one would not cut oft 
 a limb, while there is any hope of recovering 
 it. 
 
 Nothing is sin strictly speaking, but a vo- 
 luntary transgression of a known law of God. 
 Therefore every voluntary breach of the law 
 of love is sin : and nothing else, if we speak 
 properly. To strain the matter farther, is 
 only to make way for Calvinism. There 
 may be ten thousand wandering thoughts, and, 
 forgetful intei-vals without any breach of 
 love though not without transgressing the 
 Adamic law. But Calvinist's would fain con- 
 found these together. Let love fill your heart, , 
 and it is enough ! Your Affectionate Brother, 
 
 JOHN WESLKY 
 
( rs ) 
 
 LETTER XXXIT. 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis....to the Revd.John Wesley. 
 Waterford, August 8, 1772. 
 
 DEAPv SIR^ 
 
 YOUR Last favour reached me here, it 
 ame timely to quiet many fears, blessed be 
 God who has in mercy restored you again to 
 his people, I request to know particularly how 
 your health is at present. This society is in- 
 creased in number and grace since I was last 
 here ; I do meet a Band and a class, we all 
 speak with freedom. I love the people, and 
 I believe they love me, there are three preach- 
 ers on the circuit and all have work enough. 
 J. D. is now in Limerick, but as yet quiet, 
 why did you not write to himself also ? Your 
 answer to my last question has given me 
 much satisfaction, as I would always chose to 
 have your authority for any thing I should 
 advance. I thmk I am ever learning, and 
 still a novice, I am even astonished at my own 
 blindness; yet my greatest defect does npt 
 lie here, I find I do not want the light of truth, 
 so much as the fire of love. Here indeed I 
 am miserably deficient, my cold, dead, stupid 
 heart is seldom lively or active after God. 
 
( 76 ) 
 
 How is this, if it be wholly given to him? 
 (which indeed I think it is) in short I think I 
 am the most inconsistent of all creatures, and 
 amongst all I converse with, can meet none 
 like myself, my mind is prone to wander, or 
 rather it is seldom stayed, and though I feel 
 almost continual distress for this, yet still it 
 continues the same ; this makes me less use- 
 ful than I might be, and is often a reproach to 
 me, when I speak or act for God. Amongst 
 the number that do request, and are in some 
 degree worthy of your prayers, may the Lord 
 sometimes bring to your mind, your weak 
 unworthy Sister. 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER XXXIII. 
 
 Rev. John Wesley. i..to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 Bristol, August 31 1772. 
 My Dear Sister. 
 
 MY Health is not worse, but rather bet- 
 ter ; your account of the society in Waterford 
 is pleasing, continue to exercise your talent / 
 amongst them, and you will be a gainer by it. 
 You need not dispute or reason about the 
 na77ic which belongs to the state you are in. 
 
( 'r7 ) 
 
 you know what you have : be thankful for it. 
 You know what you want, zeal, hvehness, 
 StabiUt}^, deliverance from wandering imagi- 
 nations. Well then, ask and it shall be given. 
 The way into the holiest is open through the 
 blood of Jesus. You have free access through 
 him, 
 
 *' Tolilm your every want 
 In instant prayei* display 
 Pray always, pray and never faint 
 Pray, without ceasing Pray !" 
 
 See lielp while yet you ask is given ? I am 
 Dear Sister, Your AfFectionate Brother, 
 JOHN WESLEY, 
 
 LETTER XXXIV. 
 
 iNIrs. Eliza Bennis....to the Rev. John Wesley 
 
 Limerick^ October 1^, 1772. 
 jMy Dear Sir. 
 
 A multiplicity of hindrances prevented 
 my acknowledging the receipt of your last 
 favour till now. I left the Waterford Society . 
 in a prosperous situation : but have found 
 this in a decline, and in confusion ; the sower 
 of tares has got amongst them* O how is it 
 that the followers of Christ cannot speak and 
 think, and act in love ? since my last I have- 
 been wading through deep waters ; many tri- 
 G 2 
 
( ^8 ) 
 
 als pressing hard on me, and all together, 
 and so suited as to make them the more dis- 
 tressing ; so that I have been at times ready 
 to sink under their weight, And yet I think 
 these very trials would not be so tryiug to 
 another, and therefore that this is a mark of 
 the want of grace in me ; my ignorance and 
 blindness is so great, that I frequently know 
 not whether I am right or wrong. But the 
 Lord my God knows that the desire of my 
 soul is to do his will ; he knows why he 
 suffers me to be so closely exercised. I do 
 not, I cannot, find fault, with what he either 
 docs with or suffers upon me ; but I would 
 that he would give me more strength, and that 
 his presence might be with me, for I feel it 
 more than nature is able to support under, to 
 bear the weight of inward and outward afflic- 
 lions, and the absence of God altogether. 
 His love is better than life, and under the 
 cheering light of his countenance, I could 
 suffer any thing, but for some time past this 
 has been eclipsed, except at short and seldom 
 intervals, my desire is, that he himself would 
 search out the cause ; and think my heart lies 
 open and honest before him; he knows I 
 would not be deceived, and that all in Heaven 
 
C 79 ) 
 
 or Earth cannot satisfy without himself, i 
 feel a consolation in thus spreading my state 
 before you, and am thankful to God for this 
 privilege. Had I such an opportunity as I 
 long for, I could say much, which I cannot 
 commit to paper. But as the Lord in mercy 
 to us has spared your useful life, and restored 
 to you a measure of health, shall we not see 
 you next summer? may we expect it ?...! have 
 had some late opportunities of Mrs. D. I think 
 her in a happy state ; but the distress of my 
 mind, has made these opportunities fewer than 
 otherwise they would be.... I know Satan de- 
 sires to sift me as wheat, and I am content to 
 undergo the winnowing, so I lose only the 
 chaiF. My soul with all the feeble power it 
 has, hangs upon the Lord, and hope he wiU 
 again restore to me the joy of his salvation. O 
 pray for your weak unworthy Sister 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER XXXV. 
 Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 Colchester^ -November 3, 1772. 
 
 DEAR SISTER, 
 
 YOUR time was well bestowed at water- 
 ford ; many I doubt not will remember it with 
 thankfulness. But why this want of dicipline 
 
( 80 ) 
 
 in Limerick ! whenever this is clroped all is 
 confusion, see that it be immediately restored. 
 Captain Webb is now in Dublin, invite him 
 to visit Limerick, he is a man of fire, and the 
 power of God constantly accompanies his 
 word, speak a little to as many as you can, 
 go among them, to their houses, speak in love 
 and discord will vanish. It is hardly possible for 
 you to comfort or strenghten others, without 
 some comfort returning into your own bosom. 
 
 It is probable I shall visit Ireland in spring, 
 though I am almost a disabled soldier. I am 
 forbid to ride, and am obliged to travel mostly 
 in a carriage. 
 
 Whom do you think proper to succeed the 
 present preachers at Limerick and Waterford? 
 You have need to stir up the gift of God that 
 is in you. Light will spring up. Why not 
 now ? is not the Lord at hand ? I am, my 
 Dear Sister Your Affectionate Brother, 
 
 JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 LETTER XXXVI. 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis...to the Rev. John Wesley. 
 Limerick^ December^ 1st 1772 
 
 DEAR SIR, 
 
 Blessed be my God, through many and 
 grievous trials, he does still support and up 
 
( 81 ) 
 
 hold a feeble worm ; he does perfect his 
 strength in my weakness, and enables me to 
 pursue my way, determined by his grace to 
 follow him, whithersoever he shall lead me. 
 But I think in this, I do not enjoy that mea- 
 sure of sweetness and delight, which others 
 do. 
 
 However distressing it may be to con- 
 sider you as a disabled soldier, the expecta- 
 tion of seeing you here again, gives me much 
 satisfaction, may the Lord prosper your way, 
 and make your coming a blessing to all. 
 
 Our society is once more re-adjusted, we 
 all seem to be in love, and in earnest ; Captain 
 Webb's visit has proved a blessing; our 
 house was not large enough for the congre- 
 gations, many outward hearers seem under 
 awakenings. If we could now have a succes- 
 sion of strange preachers from the neighbour- 
 ing circuits, perhaps poor Limerick might 
 once more raise its head. I am my Dear 
 Sir, Your Affectionate Sister, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS» 
 
( 82 ) 
 
 LETTER XXXVII. 
 Rev. John Wesley.. .to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 Shoreham^ December 16, 1772. 
 Dear Sister Bknnis. 
 
 THE plan which you mention, I prefer 
 to any other, and have wrote to put it in prac- 
 tice immediately. 
 
 I think you make most of your trials, by 
 unbelief and giving too much way to rea- 
 soning; do not stoop to reason with the ad- 
 versary, but fly to the strong for more strength, 
 which by asking you will receive. Be dili- 
 gent in helping others. I hope you visit 
 Mrs. D. frequently ; let not your talent rust, 
 but see to gain double interest, you work for 
 a generous master. Fight on and conquer 
 all ! Joy you shall have, if joy is best.. ..My 
 dear Sister adieu. Your aifectionate Bro- 
 ther. 
 
 JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 LETTER XXXVIII. 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis.. .to the Rev. John Wesley. 
 Limerkk^ January 23, 1773. 
 
 DEAR SIR. 
 
 THE first day of this month was kept by 
 thissociety, and by all the societies in the three 
 neighbouring circuits, as a day of fasting and 
 
( 83 ) 
 
 prayer, to intercede with God for a revival of 
 his work here ; it was indeed a solemn day, 
 and at the renewal of the covenant at night, 
 God did hear prayer, and wonderfully mani- 
 fested himself in the midst of us; I think 
 many Avill remember it long ; since then our 
 congregations are encreased, seventeen added 
 to the society, nine of which are justified, 
 and seven of our old members profess to be 
 renewed in love. The prayer meetings are 
 re-established, and our preachers are liked ; 
 and beloved as holy zealous men. Why are 
 not fast days more frequent among the Me-r 
 thodists in general ? I have observed that 
 God always particularly blesses such times 
 here, and why not elsewhere ? 
 
 I find that the Lord is indeed my portion, 
 and he does enable me to press after him 
 through many hinderances; I see there is no 
 standing still, and am ashamed I have loiter- 
 ed so long, may he help me to double m)^ 
 diligence; this by his grace is my determi- 
 nation. Yet I am so well acquainted with 
 my own extreme weakness, that I cannot pro- 
 mise for myself one hour. Hitherto my God 
 hath helped me, and in him is all my dej^:>en 
 
( 84 ) 
 
 dance; past mercies encourage me to trust 
 him for future support, and his faithfulness 
 strengthens my confidence. I see myself a 
 poor weak helpless creature; poor beyond 
 description I and this view drives me to the 
 Lord Jesus, whose fuUness alone, I find suffi- 
 cient for all my wants ; and my whole soul 
 acquiesces and is thankful for this gracious 
 glorious method of Salvation, O that the obe- 
 dience of my life might testify my gratitude, 
 and my heart return love for love. But here 
 I fail ; in both I am miserably deficient, and 
 cannot say I am at all satisfied with myself; 
 yet when the power of faith is strong, this 
 brings me again to the same place, so that 
 I am not the poorer for my poverty, Christ 
 is my refuge, and my soul hides under his 
 merit, and leaves the whole to him, thus I am 
 supported with strength not my own, and 
 live wholly on the bounty of an other ; and 
 while I expect nothing from myself, I am not 
 disappointed ; could I always be able thus to 
 exercise my faith, I should always be happy. 
 But O my blindness, what labyrinths am I 
 too often led into by my own ignorance. Dear 
 Sir, continue to instruct one of the w^'^l*'^'^* 
 
( 85 ) 
 
 that applies to our common Father, and to you 
 as his special messenger for counsel. 
 
 Your truly Affectionate Sister, 
 
 ELIZx\ BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER XXXIX. 
 
 Rev. John Wcfsley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 February^ 12, 1773 
 
 My dear sister. 
 
 WHEN we draw near to God in his ap- 
 pointed ways, he will surely draw near to us ; 
 pray remind Mr. G. of using the same means, 
 then he and you will find the same blessing ; 
 write to Waterford to brother S. and encour- 
 age him to do there as he did at Limerick. 
 
 I can observe by Mrs. D's. manner of wri- 
 ting, a very considerable change in her spirit 
 
 more acquaintance \\\\h Ccd; more humility 
 and more artless simple love j I am much 
 pleased ye visit so frequently continue to lead the 
 simple, and God will give you more wisdom. 
 As long as you trust, not in yourself, but 
 in him that has all power in Heaven and in 
 Earth ; you will find his grace sufficient for 
 you and his strengdi made perfect iny our weak- 
 ness. Look to him continually, and trust in. 
 
 him, that you may increase with all the in- 
 H 
 
3G 
 
 crease of God, I am, my Dear Sister, Your 
 ever AiFecticnate Brother, 
 
 JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 LETTER XL. 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis, to ihe Rev. John Wesley. 
 Limerick^ March 16, 1773. 
 
 BEAR SIR, 
 
 By a letter from Mrs. D. now in Cork, 
 I am informed that Ave may expect you in the 
 kingdom next month, may the Lord prosper 
 your way, and give you to see much fruit of 
 your labour. I never longed more to see you, 
 yet am afraid to solace myself in the expecta- 
 tion, least the Lord should see fit to cfisappoint 
 me. I am still the same poor tottering fee- 
 ble creature ; bowed down under a sense of 
 my numberless deficiencies, yet wonderfully 
 and graciously supported by strength not my 
 own. I think others go on much more comfort- 
 ably than I do, but perhaps the Lord sees this 
 best for m.e, and could I always see his will in 
 it, I should be satisfied ; for he knows I de- 
 sire to suffer his will. Indeed I think in the 
 whole world there cannot be a more feeble or ' 
 unprofitable creature. When I consider the 
 helps which are afforded me, and my non-.im-. 
 
( er ) 
 
 prove ment of all, my spirit is even sunk 
 within me ; and though I am enabled to come 
 to the Lord Jesus as my only refuge, yet I 
 f^c] a v/ant of that strength and vigour of soul 
 >vhich would bring glory to God, or comfort 
 sufficient to my own soul.... I propose much 
 satisfliction to myself in laying open my state 
 before you, when 1 have the happiness of see- 
 ing you, if the Lord shall think fit to afford 
 me an opportunity : 'till then I hope for the 
 assistance of your prayers, and am, &g. 
 
 EI.IZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER XLL 
 Key. John \ytsley...:o Mrs. Eliza Bennls. 
 
 Dublin, April, 1, 177 Z. 
 
 MY DEAR SISTER. 
 
 I FEAR you are too idle, this will cer- 
 
 . imly bring condemnation. Up and be doing ! 
 
 do not loiter, see that your talent rust not, 
 
 rather let it gain ten more, and it it?///, if you 
 
 » use it* 
 
 You are permitted to be in heaviness, to 
 
 ; humble and prove you yet more. Then you 
 
 shall come forth as Gold. If vou love me 
 
 you will both VvTite and speak freely, to 
 
 my Dear Sister, Your Affectionate ; 
 
 JOHN WESLEY. 
 
( C8 ) 
 
 LETTER XLir. 
 Mrs.. Eliza Bennis, to the Rev. John Wesle). 
 Limerick, August, 25, 1773. 
 
 DEAR SIR, 
 
 THE want of any thing particular this 
 some time past, has prevented my troubl- 
 ing you, or intruding on your more precious 
 time. Br.t the desire of receiving a line from 
 you, has obliged me to break through. Bles- 
 sed be God he does carry on his work amongst 
 us ; tjiere has been several days of fasting and 
 prayer kept by the select band, and two by 
 the whole society, and I believe most, found 
 them solemn seasons; nor has the Lord suf- 
 fered us to seek his face in vain, some are 
 added, some ccnvtrrcd, and some renewed in 
 love. The young men are again stirred up, 
 and I hope more in earnest than they have 
 been for several months; the select band 
 meet well, and our meetings are comfortable 
 because preachers and people are all of one 
 mind, and whilst this is the case, the band 
 will thrive. As for myself, I have taken the 
 Lord for my portion, instead of every other 
 good. I have solemnly (and I think without 
 reserve) surrendered m} self and all my con- 
 cerns into his hands with an entire submission 
 
{ 80 ) 
 
 to his will ; then how is it, that I find disap- 
 pointments in temporals (with which I am 
 now surrounded) bear so heavy on me ? And 
 be capable of giving me so much distress ^ 
 The effect thatoutward trials have on my mind, 
 causes many questionings, and uneasy fears ; 
 and often puts me to a stand concerning my 
 experience. At times the Lord does give me 
 to see that I am all his ; but are not trials the 
 surest proof of our grace ? Indeed I see what 
 a poor novice I am ! How little I know, and 
 how little I can suiTer or bear for my great 
 and gracious Master's sake, surely, I want 
 an increase of faith ! O help me by your 
 prayers....! am Dear Sir, Your affectionate, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER XLIII 
 Rev. John Wesley. ..to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 Bristol, September 10, 1773, 
 
 MY DEAR SISTEll, 
 
 WHEN two or three agree to seek God 
 by fasting and prayer, it cannot be that their 
 labours should be in vain. Especially if they 
 add their endeavours to their prayer for the 
 increase of the work of God. I hope you 
 will incourage every preacher to visit the 
 H2 
 
( 90 ) 
 
 whole society in order ^ from house to house ^ 
 dinner or drinking tea, does not answer the 
 satne intention. This may and ought to be 
 done over and above. 
 
 I thought you had been in more danger of 
 being hurt by worldly abundance than world- 
 ly care. But we cannot stand under either 
 one or the other, unless we be endued widi 
 power from on high. And that continually, 
 from hour to hour, or rather from moment to 
 moment. Yet distress is not sin ; we may 
 be grieved and still resigned. And this is 
 acceptable with God. In all these cases, you 
 should reraember that observation, never to 
 be let slip, 
 
 ** With even mind, thy course of duty nin : 
 
 *' God notliing dees, or suffers to be donc^ 
 
 •' But thou wpuld'at do thyself; if thou coulc/'st see 
 
 " The end oi all events, as well as He !" 
 
 My dear Sister, Adieu.. ..Your Affection- 
 ate Brother. JOHN WESLEY. 
 
 LEITERXLIV. 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis, to the Rev. John Wesley. 
 Limerick, November 11, 17TS. 
 Dear Sir, 
 
 THOUGH the Lord has blessed my 
 husband's industry, far above our expectation, 
 and has given me both the necessaries and 
 
( 91 ) 
 
 conveniencics of lifej yet with these I feel 
 such a measure of trouble and care, and such 
 a mixture of uneasiness^ as makes me often 
 sick of the enjoyment. 
 
 I see the hand of God in this, and have 
 reason to praise his name, that he does not 
 suifer me to rest in any thing below himself, 
 but does so embitter earthly enjoyments to 
 me as continually to remind me that happi- 
 ness is not in them, thus trials, disappoint- 
 ments and difficulties in life are at times made 
 profitable by keeping my heart weaned from 
 earthly comforts, and pointing me constantly 
 to the Lord Jesus where only solid happiness 
 is to be found. But in my passing through 
 these, I find much cause of dissatisfaction 
 with myself; I see I do not suffer or bear as I 
 should ; in every respect I come short, and 
 thereby continually make additional cause of 
 sorrow and distress for myself. 
 
 There is one particular evil that cleaves to 
 me, and causes me much bitterness of soul; 
 that is a hastiness of spirit with my children, 
 a fire within, that like lightning suddenly flash- 
 es, and is ready to bum up all before it ; this 
 is worse to me than all outward tryals, these 
 I look upon as under the direction of that pro- 
 
( 9:2 ) 
 
 vidence who guides all things for his own 
 glory and my good, But this appears as a fiend 
 within ; as an enemy cf God, still harboured 
 in the heart, and rises continually as an evi- 
 dence against me. that I am all wrong. I 
 i;trive and pray against it, but am not deliver-^' 
 ed : is this consistent with an heart perfected 
 in love 1 There are some of my intimate 
 friends, whose complaints are the same with 
 mine ; and for whose sake as well as my own 
 I would be thankful for your judgment and 
 advice. And as your letters are always made 
 a blessing to me, I request you will favour me 
 with your opinion, directed to Wateiford, 
 where I am nov/ preparing to go, I am Dear 
 Sir. Your truly Affectionate Sister, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LKTTiiH XLV. 
 
 Kev. John Wesley.. ..to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 Sheerness December 1, 1773. 
 
 MY DEAR SISTER, 
 
 SOME Time since, when I heard brother 
 Bennis had got '^i^ery rich, I was in fear for 
 you, least tlie world should again find a way 
 into your heart, and damp your noblest affec- 
 tions ; I am not sorrj' that you have not that 
 
( 93 ) 
 
 temptation; It is most desirable, to have nei- 
 ther poverty, nor riches j but still, you cannot 
 be without temp tation, unless you would 
 go out of the world. How far that sudden emo- 
 tion which you speak of, is a preternatural 
 dart from Satan, and how far it springs from 
 your own heart, it is exceeding hard to judge. 
 It is possible it may be neither one nor the 
 other, buta meer effect of the natural mecha- 
 nism of the body, which has no more of 
 either good or evil, than the blushing or burn- 
 ing pole. But whether it be natural or pre- 
 ternatural it is grievous to one whose consci- 
 ence is tender. We naay therefore undoubt- 
 edly pray against it. And surely he can and 
 will deliver us. Come therefore boldly to the 
 throne of grace, and find grace to help in time 
 of need. 
 
 You wdll find full emoyment in Waterford ; 
 I believe that society wants your exertions ; 
 see therefore that you be not weary of well 
 doing. I am my Dear sister. 
 
 Your Affectionate Brother, 
 
 JOHN WESLEY, 
 
( ^i ) 
 
 LKTTER XLVI. 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis..*.to the Ktv. John V/tsle) , 
 JVaterfora', December 29, 1773. 
 
 DEAR SIR, 
 
 YOUR Last gave me much satisfaction, 
 as indeed all your letters do ; O what cause 
 have I to be thankful for such helps; when I 
 find any thing in my experience \\ hich appears 
 doubtful, 1 am rather api lo conclude against 
 myself, and though this may proceed from an 
 honesty of heart ; yet it has often been cause 
 of much distress to me, by opening a way for 
 the disputations of the enemy, and indeed of 
 my owTi mind, for I am of myself led to look 
 for that uniformity in all my experience which 
 appears to me consistent with a state of per- 
 fection, but which I certainly do not find ; and 
 so great is my ignorance that I knownot where 
 to lay the blame ; I cannot charge it on God, 
 therefore I willingly lay it on myself; and 
 from this cause have been times without num 
 ber ready to give up my hold as to the work 
 of sanctification, but am prevented, I know 
 not how? Indeed in every particular case 
 your judgment determines the matter, and 
 gives full satisfaction, nor can I be satisfied 
 
however clear the case may appear to my mind, 
 until I receive your approbation of it, and 
 even then I am often apt to think you pass too 
 favourable a judgment on me. 
 
 Indeed in general I find such a deadness of 
 affection, such a want of ^varmth and fervor 
 of spirit towards God, and such an unaccoun- 
 table unsteadiness of mind, and proneness to 
 wander, as I think none else who make the 
 same profession does experience ; what shall 
 I say to this ? If the evil propensity be taken 
 out of my heart, why should I find any diffi- 
 culty in keeping it stayed upon God ? This • 
 was the case once, but it is not so now, nor 
 can I at any time doubt but that the work was 
 w rought, but finding it not with me no%v as 
 it , was then, I ofteUj suffer painful fears, least 
 all sfiould not now be right. My Dear Sir, I 
 know your love, will bear w ith all my folly, 
 and as I would act without disguise before 
 you, so I hope you will lay my weakness 
 I before the Lord; indeed it is often my request 
 that he would lay me upon your heart in pray- 
 er, blessed be his name, through the \\hoIe, I 
 do find it the desire of .my soul to do his will* 
 »,.,He has in much mercy brought me safe t<^ 
 
( 96 ) 
 
 this place, but cannot see wherein I can h% 
 useful here, 1 think I never was less fit to act 
 for God, yet find a willingness to act even 
 without life, but the people are very dead and 
 do not meet. I am Dear Sir, Yours &c. 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 LETTER XLVU, 
 
 Rev John Wesley... .to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 London January 18, 1774. 
 
 MY DEAR SISTER, 
 
 A WILL steadily and uniformly devot- 
 ed to God is essential to a state of sanctifica- 
 tion ; but not an uniformity of joy, or peace, 
 or happy communion with God. These may 
 rise and fall in various degrees; nay and may 
 be affected either by the body or by diaboli- 
 cal agency, in a manner which all our wisdom 
 can neither understand nor prevent. As to 
 wanderings, you would do right well to con- 
 sider the seiTnon on wandering thoughts, you 
 might likewise profit by Elizabeth Harper's 
 journal, whose experience much resembled 
 yours, only she was more simple : and you 
 may learn from her, to go straight to liod, as a 
 litde child, and tell him all your trouble; , and 
 hindrances and doubts; and desire him to 
 
iiirn them all to good. You are net 
 sent to Waterfofd to be useless. Stir up the 
 gift of God which is in you; gather together 
 those that have been scattered abroad, 
 and make up a band ; if not. a class or two* 
 Your best way would be to visit from house to 
 house, by this means you can judge of their 
 conduct and disposition in domestic life, and 
 may have opportunity to speak to the young 
 of the family. Besides, this will stir up the 
 preachers to do the same, which will be a great 
 point gained ; as it is very hard to get them to 
 attend to this most essential part of theirduty.... 
 By motion you will contract warmth. By im- 
 parting life you will increase it in yourself. 
 
 As to the circumstance mentioned in the 
 post- script of your last. I should really think 
 you would do well to exert yourself in that 
 matter as much as possible. It will be a cross, 
 take up that cross, bear your cross, and it will 
 bear you ; and if you do it with a single eye, 
 k will be no loss to your soul. 
 I .im my Dear Sister, 
 
 Your Affectionate Brother, 
 JOHN WESLKY. 
 I 
 
( 98 ) 
 
 LETTER XLVIII. 
 
 From Mrs. BeFin]s....to the Rev. John Wesley. 
 IVaterfcrd^ Fcbruarij 10, 17/4. 
 
 DEAP. SIR. 
 
 AS usual your letter brought a blessing 
 with it, from the time I received it my miixl 
 has been more at rest, and my soui more 
 happy; I have Elizabeth Harpers journal, and 
 sincerely wish I had her simplicity, I know 
 I suiFer for want of it. When I can come 
 simply to the Lord I always find it does best 
 with me, But there are certain exercises of 
 mind v. hich I am often under, when the pow- 
 er ofthis is taken from me; I endeavour at 
 such times to come to the Lord Jesus as at 
 other times, but all before me is contused and 
 clouded, so that I cannot get through. I then 
 think none whose hearts are given to God are 
 in this state ; and from the view I then have of 
 myself am ready to fear that all is ^vrong; and 
 am obliged to stand still without concluding 
 on either side, until the Lord determine for 
 me. Indeed I may say my ^vhole experience 
 is one continued conflict with the pov/ers of , 
 darkness ; I do not say this by way of com- 
 plaint, but I think there is still such a mix- 
 ture of self in me, that it has need of this fire 
 
( 99 ) 
 
 to purge it ; and I am satisfied it should be so. 
 I love the Lord, he is my God, and his will is 
 street to me, and am desirous he should 
 perfect it in me, by whatever means he 
 sliail see fit; I have only one condition to make 
 that he would keep me ever his: But it is ve- 
 ry grievous to me when my state is not clear ; 
 I think if I had the constant approbation of 
 his spirit, I should never complain ; I have 
 .been asking for this, but it is always object- 
 ed i how can God approve of such an unholy 
 creature ? how can he be always v/ell pleased 
 with me, when by reason of my folly I must 
 be displeased with m}rself. Yet I know it is 
 an easy thing with him to remove every hin- 
 drance, and give the abiding witness ; O that 
 he would increase my faith, to ask so that I 
 might receive. 
 
 I am not likely to leave this soon ; but can 
 do no good here, by the frequent neglect of 
 preaching, and the almost total neglect of dis- 
 cipline, the people are scattered, and of the 
 few that remain, some are grieved, and some 
 offended widi this new method of preaching 
 salvation by works ; they have for many }ears 
 by-n taught to depend on the Lord Jesus 
 
alone ; and through his merit and death alone 
 to seek for justification here, and a final ac- 
 quittance at the great day. But now after ally 
 are ^v*e to be made perfect in the flesh, aud to 
 be accepted only for our works ; and even at 
 the great day is our faith, nay and the righte- 
 ousness of Christ to profit us nothing ? but 
 our works only ; if this was the case, might 
 I not say , . . . ' * U^ho then can be sated. ' ' 
 
 Mr. Hawksworth a calvinist preacher under 
 Lady Huntington has come here, and preach- 
 es regularly at Methodist hours, (in a large 
 room) and to large congregations ; he is to 
 stay for some time, and when he goes another 
 is to be sent in his room ; our people though 
 forbid by the preachers, go almost constantly 
 to hear him... I have spoken to several, but 
 with little effect, and have heard his discours- 
 es so praised that I did wish to hear him.... 
 but would not shew the example.... but I yes- 
 terday paid him a visit at his lodging, and. 
 had an hours conversation with him... I charg- 
 ed him with unfriendly and unchristian- like 
 conduct in taking advantage of the disordered 
 state of your Society, and trying at such a 
 particular time to widen the breach and glean 
 
( 101 ) 
 
 all to himself, which he indirectly acknow-. 
 ledged was his motive for coming. 
 
 Dear Sir, the situation of these poor scat- 
 tered sheep distresses me much ; O that God 
 may interpose in behalf of poor Waterford, 
 and may enable you to jDoint out some way 
 for their reunion, inclosed I send you a par- 
 ticular request from a few sincere souls. 
 Indeed my heart is pained for them pray let 
 ili^ hear from you soon. I am Dear Sir, 
 Your Affectionate Sister, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER XLIX. 
 
 Kev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 London^ March 1, 1/74. 
 jMy Dkar SietivH. 
 
 ELIZABETH Harper was frequendygin 
 clouds too: and in that case, it is the best 
 way to stand still, you can do nothing but 
 simply tell all your wants to him that is both 
 able and willing to supply them. 
 
 I inclose James Perfect's letter to you, on 
 purpose that you may talk with him. He 
 has both an honest heart, and a good under- 
 standing ; but you eni'irely mistake his doc- 
 trine. He preaches salvation by faith in the 
 I 
 
C 102 ) 
 
 same manner, that my brother and I have 
 clone : and as Mr. Fletcher (one of the 
 finest writers of the age) has beautifully ex- 
 plained it. None of us talk of being accept- 
 ed for our works : that is the calvinist slan- 
 der. But we all maintain, we are not 
 saved without works ; that works are a 
 condition (though not the nieritorious 
 cause) of final salvation, it is by faith in the 
 righteousness and blood of Christ, that we are 
 enabled to c^o all good works. And it is for the 
 sake of these, that all who fear God and 
 work righteousness are accepted of him. 
 
 It is far better for our people not to hear 
 Mr. Hawks worth, calvinism will do them no 
 good, as to the rest I refer to my inclosure to 
 Mr. M'c Donnel with whom I wish you to 
 have so me conversation. Be not discoura- 
 ged, I really believe God will visit poor Water 
 ford in love ; do you go on. Bear up the hands 
 that hangdown, by faith and paayer support the 
 tottering knee : reprove, encourage ; have you 
 appointed any days of fasting and prayer, Storm 
 the throne of grace, and persevere therein 
 and mercy will c^me down, I am yours &c . 
 JOHN WES!,KY. 
 
( 103 ) 
 LETTER L. 
 Mrs. Eiiza Bennis...to the Rev. John Wesley. 
 Limerick^ April 12, 1774. 
 
 DEAK SIR, 
 
 I think I do not at all mistake your doc- 
 trine, and so far as I am able to comprehend 
 it, do find my whole soul acquiesce in every 
 point. Nor would I, if I could be saved in 
 any other "way ; you have seen enough to be 
 able to discover all my mistakes/ but you 
 have not reproved my errors ; and surely I 
 should take this as the greatest instance of your 
 love ; I do not meet with many w^ho are faithful 
 in this respect; and as you have seen the 
 workings of my heart for many years, (nor 
 indeed is there a thought in it, I would wish 
 to conceal from you) my errors both in prin- 
 ciple and practice must be more conspicuous 
 to you than to any other. 
 
 I believe Mr. Perfect is a good man, and 
 in whose conversation, I should liaye much 
 satisfaction, I think the people are happy in 
 him,' 'and his fellow labourer, and their la- 
 bours have been particnlarly blessed in the 
 county Wexford. But as I may be free to 
 \^rlte you in}- thoughts without your taking 
 .'i: amiss. In time r^ar,!, w -icii all contended 
 
C i04 ; 
 
 for salvation by faith, I often thought.- that 
 through zeal for this, the necessity of good 
 works was not enough enforced up n the 
 people, but since Mr. Fletchers writings on 
 this subject have appeared ; I think, with 
 some, the error seems to be now on the 
 other side. Nor do I wonder ihat the incau- 
 tious, full of zeal against any thing, should 
 take a step too far, but then we must also expect 
 that such a step will not pass unnoticed. 'Nor is 
 every person able to make allowance for such 
 a mistake ; especially when it is often repeat- 
 ed. But as to that particular point, I would 
 willingly have your judgment on it for itiy 
 p:^va satisfaction, whether we are to e:xpcct 
 final justification or acquittance at the day of 
 judgment meerly for our works, and whether 
 the merit and righteousness of Christ shall 
 then avail us any thing. 
 
 I received your last letter in Waterford, 
 Mr. Perfect being then on the circuit I did 
 not see him to deliver yours but left it for him, 
 and have received one from him since I came 
 home; since I wrote lastto you, my soul has 
 been in general more happy, the Lord has 
 been pleased to keep ihe enemy at a greater 
 distance, and to allow me a clearer and more 
 
( 105 ) 
 
 constant sense of his work on my heart ; so 
 that whilst I remained at Waterford, I found 
 my soul more established in his grace, I 
 have reason to thank the Lord that he did thus 
 6trenghten mej for I found when I came 
 home, I had need of it. I have since then 
 been much weighed down, discouraged, and 
 distressed. I found the preacher and people 
 by the ears, divided into parties, and some 
 turned out of the way, for the most trifling 
 matter that can be conceived. It is very 
 unusual with me, to trouble you with such 
 disputes, but as there has a letter gone to jrou 
 already concerning it, I thought in common 
 justice you ought to be acquainted with the 
 whole '^•^^'^^•^■^'^^if'^*"^'^'^^^^'^'^!^'^"''^'^^^^"^^'^^^^ 
 
 l^<J» vl><l».\l<'t>«M««Xt\i<U>xl«>l.»lj»Li»i<«l>^!yv'<sl«Nl/U >^^>I<\l<v U\^M/<i>\l>>l»\t>>U 
 
 TT^"^ ff> ^^ !f! .^ ^ ^ J^ ^ Jf' ^ ffi Jf> )fl J^ ^ If, ^ ^ ^ JS ^ ^:^k^/^V'T>'i\'^/r 
 
 matters here wear a gloomy aspect, both as to 
 spirituals and temporals, and in the present 
 situation much depends on the person who 
 may succeed Mr. W....had your plan been 
 followed, there would be none of all this, 
 not do I ever see good proceed from the op- 
 posing your commands, may the Lord res- 
 tore peace and unity among us ; and may he 
 
( 106 ) 
 
 long preserve you over his church is the 
 
 ardent prayer of Dear Sir, yours he, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 Lfci' lEK LI. 
 Rev. Joha V/e8ky,..to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 Leeds, May 2, 1774. 
 MY Dear Sister, 
 
 UNTIL Mr. Hill and his Associates 
 
 puzzled the cause, it was as plain, as plain 
 could be ; the Methodists always held, 
 and have declared a thousand times ; the death 
 of Christ is the meritorious cause of our Sal- 
 vation, (that is pardon, holiness, glory) lov- 
 ing obedient faith is the condition of Glory. 
 This Mr Fletcher has so illustrated and con- 
 firmed, as I think scarce any one has done be- 
 ibre or since the Apostles. 
 
 When Mr. W. wrote me a vehement letter 
 concerning the abuse he had received from 
 the young men in Limerick, and his determi- 
 nation to put them all out of the society, if 
 they did not acknowjegc their fault. I much 
 wondered what could be the matter, and only 
 wrote him word ** I never put any out of our 
 society for any thing they say of me*\,.. 
 You are come in good time to make peace. 
 feo on, and prosper. Your ever AfTectionate 
 
 JOHN WESLEY, 
 
C ^^7 \ 
 
 LETTER Lil. 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis....to the Rev. John Wesley 
 
 L'nnerick^ Jiilij 21, 1774. 
 
 r/EAPw SIR, 
 
 SINCE I v.Tote you last, I have been 
 exercised with sickness in my faaiily ; and at 
 tlie same time my oldest son (apprentice in 
 Waterford) had a fever and by all accounts 
 was in great danger; I found this to be a hea- 
 vy trial, but the Lord was with me in it, and 
 did enable me in the most grievous part of it 
 to say with my whole heart *'Thy will be 
 done"... this' trial, and the Lords dealing in itj 
 has proved a great blessing to my soul, as in- 
 deed every trial does. I do find in general 
 that afflictive dispensations are of all others 
 the most profitable to me. Such is the stub- 
 bornness of my heart, that it has need of being 
 softened with stripes ; yet surely the Lord does 
 deal very graciously, by affording me only 
 such a measure of these as he sees absolutely 
 necessary ; and by the many deliverances he 
 works out for me, gives me to see his tender^ 
 ness and love towards me ; so that I may tru- 
 ly say my whole life is one continued scene of 
 mercies. And in some deg^^ee the Lord does 
 
( 108 ) 
 
 make me sensibla of, and thankful for his 
 goodness.... For some time past, my soul has 
 been kept more than ordinarily happy in God ; 
 frequent opportunities of Christian conver- 
 sation always has this effect, and Mr. Snowden 
 has afforded me many happy seasons of this 
 kind, which have been much blessed to both, 
 he still retains his happines and confidence, 
 and I trust Will continue to do so ; I, with ma- 
 ny others have reason to thank the I^ord for 
 sending him to Limerick. 
 
 He came at a very critical time, and his en- 
 tire deportment since, has been such as to 
 gain the love and esteem of all the people. 
 Peace and harmony subsists?now amongst us, 
 ajid the generality seem to have but one end 
 in view. Yet we want a greater revival, the 
 Select Band set apart some days to wres- 
 tle with God for this,... which has not been al- 
 together in vain ; but we wait for a fuller an- 
 swer : by a letter from Mr. M'donnel, the 
 work of Gcd is prospering in the county Wex- 
 ford.. .but in Waterford they are still lifeless, 
 we have proposed to them, and all the coun- 
 try societies on this and that round, to set 
 apart the first of next month as a day of 
 
C 109 ) 
 
 fasting and prayer, solely on their behalf.... 
 perhaps the Lord would be intreatcd, and 
 cause the dry bones to live. I am Dear Sir, &,c. 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER LIIL 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis, to the Rev. John Wesley. 
 
 Limerick, December 24, 17'74. 
 Dear Sir, 
 
 I HAVE delayed to acknowledge the 
 receipt of your last, 'till I could inform you of 
 my son's arrival at Kingswood school, in this I 
 have given him up to the Lord, without mak- 
 ing any choice, desiring that he may dispose 
 of him as seemeth him best ; and in this sur- 
 render I find my mind entirely eased of every 
 burden concerning this child ; Indeed not 
 only in this, but in every aflPair of life I see the 
 Lord is willing to bear my burden, when I 
 simply and confidently cast it upon him. Nor 
 do I find any other way of deliverance, and 
 had not the Lord in many cases pointed me 
 to himself, and enabled me to cast all my care 
 upon him I should have sunk under the weight; 
 but glory be to him, though outward things 
 are still the same, yet they have not the same 
 K 
 
( 110 ) 
 
 effect on me, they do not distress me in the 
 manner they used to do ; my heart and trea- 
 sure is laid up above, and as to temporal af- 
 fairs, I desire to leave them entirely to the dis- 
 posal of my heavenly father ; 'svho knows best 
 how to distribute them, being fully confident 
 of his care and protection over me and mine ; 
 and knowing assuredly that his will is best 
 however humbling it may appear. This is 
 the present state of my mind, and has been so 
 for some time, and surely I may say "this hath 
 the Lord done", for no power but his, could 
 ever have subdued the world in my heart. 
 
 But a doubt arises whether I shall always 
 enjoy the same deliverance ; I trust 1 shall, 
 and am enabled to depend upon my God for 
 this also. 
 
 The work of God goes on blessedly here 
 under Mr. Snowden and Mr. M'donnel, we 
 have indeed happy meetings both in public 
 and in private ; the Lord is also at work in 
 Waterford, and in most of our country socie- 
 ties; but as you have got an account of these 
 1 liceo not recapitulate. 
 
 We rejoice at the expectation of seeing you 
 here once more, may the Lord prosper your 
 
( 111 ) 
 
 way, and send his blessing with you ;..*and 
 grant you many happy returns of this solemn 
 season... prays your truly Affectionate 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER LIV. 
 
 Rev. John Wesley. ...to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 London^ December 21, 17f6, 
 YOU are a great deal less happy thark 
 
 you would be, if you did not reason too much. 
 This frequently gives that subtle adversary, 
 an advantage against you. You have need to 
 be continually as a little child, simply looking 
 up for whatever you v/ant. 
 
 It is devoutly to be wished for, that we 
 may rejoice evermore: aud it is certain, the 
 inward kingdom of God, implies not only 
 Righteousness, and peace, but joy in the Holy 
 Ghost. You have therefore reason to ask for, 
 and expect the whole gospel blessing. Yet 
 it cannot be denied, that many times joy is 
 withheld, even from them that walk upright- 
 ly. The great point of all is, an heart and 
 a life entirely devoted to God. Keep only 
 this, and let all the rest go : give him your 
 heart and it sufficeth. I am my Dear Sister 
 Your ever Affectionate Brother, 
 
 JOHN WESLEY, 
 
( 112 ) 
 
 LETTER LV. 
 
 Mr. Thomas Walsh. ..to Mrs. Eliza Bennls. 
 
 Dublin^ December 13, 1755 . 
 
 MY DEAR SISTER. 
 
 FROM your letter, I do believe God 
 has revealed his son in yciir heart, and that 
 you have tasted of his good word: yet still 
 you feel a want of many things ; there is an 
 enij;tlnes?i in your soul. The perfect love of 
 God is Mhiit you v^ont to make you mdy holy 
 and cowpkiely happy. Hereunto are we call- 
 ed, to inherit the blessing of perfect love ; to 
 be made pure in heart, to have the glorious 
 image of God stamped on our immortal spirits. 
 
 I dare not say, that I have already attained 
 this, yet T firmly believe there is a possibility 
 of living to God every moment; and of doing 
 his \v\\\ on earth as it is done in Heaven. 
 
 Keep up a divine acquaintance with Jesus 
 Christ. Be often on your knees before him ; 
 tell him what you fear and feel. I praise his 
 name I feel his love to my soul, while I am 
 
 writing of it I am my Dear sister, your 
 
 Affectionate Brother 
 
 THOMAS WALSH. 
 
( li- ) 
 
 LETTER LYL 
 jMrs. Eliza Bennis,....to Mr. Thomas Walsh. 
 
 Limerick^ January 20, 1757. 
 SINCE I had last the pleasure of seeing 
 my Dear Brother Walsh, I have been 
 exercised with many and heavy trials; and 
 have sometimes found it hard to stand and 
 bear the stroke, and yet to look up and say 
 ^' Thy will be done".... But hitherto the Lord 
 hath brought me ; however weak, yet hang- 
 ing upon him, believing in him, and desiring 
 to do his will ; my heart is often enlarged, and 
 my desires great after perfect holiness; yet 
 finding how iniiQitely short I come, and how 
 often my purposes are broken, I am brought 
 to doubt whe Jier it be lav/ful for me to ask it 
 or not ; in your next letter I beg you will say 
 a great deal on this head, both as information 
 and instruction....! do desire that the whole 
 will of God may be done in me, and I believe 
 it is his will that I should be clean ; but the 
 promise seems to me, afar off; my heart is 
 evil, very evil; my will perverse, my affections 
 cold and dead, and my faith so weak that I often 
 doubt whether I have any or not.. I believe that 
 there is not a soul that hangs upon Christ, more 
 K 2 
 
( 114 ) 
 
 weak and helpless, and more unclean than I 
 am.... Now in this state may I expect or look 
 for an entire instantaneous change of heart 
 without first experiencing a growth in grace, 
 which I cannot say I do?. ..I shall anxiously 
 expect your Answer.. .and am Your Affec- 
 tionate Sister 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER LVn. 
 
 Mr. Thomas Walsh. ..to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 London^ February 5, 1757 
 
 MY DEAR SISTER, 
 
 BLESSED be the author of every good 
 and perfect gift, that he has inspired your soul 
 with fervent desire to be made holy and with- 
 out blame before him in love ; may the Holy 
 Ghost through the blood of the everlasting 
 covenant, make you perfect and entire lack- 
 ing nothing. You ask weighty questions in 
 your letter, as far as I have learned by scrip- 
 ture Conifer satton and Experience the general 
 method is this. 
 
 Fir St... The soul by the spirit of God ^ apply- 
 ing the commandment, is deeply convinced 
 of its darkness, guilt, misery and helplessness, 
 then a man is poor in spirit, and has noth- 
 
( 115 ) 
 
 ing to pay, but being weary and heavy laden, 
 seeks and groans to be delivered. 
 
 Secondly.... The same spirit works faith in 
 the broken heart ; giving divine light, where- 
 by the soul sees God, gracious in Christ; 
 and divine power whereby the soul can trust 
 God ; then is given the spirit of Adoption, 
 and the heaven born soul rejoices in God 
 through Christ ; loves and delights in the 
 Lord Jesus, has free access to the throne of 
 grace ; the man thus translated out of darkness 
 into marvelous light, thinks, all is right witb- 
 in him and that he shall learn war no more. 
 But in some weeks or months, by some exter- 
 nal object, of temptation, or by the direct light 
 and power of the blessed spirit, the roots of 
 bitterness in the heart are made manifest ; an- 
 ger, pride, foolish and hurtful desires, unbe- 
 lief, and spiritual indolence rise in the aifec- 
 tions ; a man is amazed and ready to conclude 
 he has deceived himself; and satan takes all 
 the advantage he can to bring him into doubt 
 and condemnation.... Yet if the man cries to 
 God, he soon answers and bears witness, that 
 nevertheless all this vikness^ he has redemption 
 Jn the blood of Jesus... then. 
 
( li^ J 
 Thirdly. Arises a cry in the soul for the 
 perfect image of God, and the mind of Christ; 
 and there follows grea.t tenderness of consci- 
 ence, deeper hatred to sin, and a vehement 
 love to holiness ; likewise the soul examines 
 and proves itself, to see if it loves, or desires, 
 or does any thing that the Lord hates or for* 
 bids ; or whether it neglects any known duty 
 it may and ought to perform ; then begins 
 more resolutely and constantly than ever, the 
 true self de?iial, and taking up the cross. 
 Right hands are cut off; right eyes are pluck- 
 ed out ; all forsaken in heart and affection. 
 In this state there is a growth in grace, and 
 the destruction of the old man ; oftentimes 
 joy, hope and liberty in prayer, yet quickly 
 follow fearS; sorrows, temptation and impa- 
 tience. After these strong desires, and stre- 
 imous endeavours. At length the soul com- 
 prehends the nature of the thing more per- 
 fectly, and believes the promise of God, that 
 he will do it. Now the tempter rages more 
 than ever ? but he has not his former power, 
 to enter or grieve the soul by his fiery darts. 
 The mind labours with greater freedom; finds 
 a sensible increase of faith, hope, and love, 
 
( 117 ) 
 
 with all the fruits that naturally grow on thenfi. 
 Yet sin is in the heart; unbelief, pride or 
 some evil affection may yet stir. But the 
 man being set upon the work, never gives 
 over, until the spirit of burning totally extir- 
 pates sin; until the blood of the lamb has 
 cleansed from all sin. This final stroke 
 is as instantaneous as justification ; and then 
 the soul is made Innocent^ has no evil temper^ 
 is strictly united to God in Christ, and finds 
 all its affections centre in God. The spirit of 
 God, shortly reveals to the mindwhat is wrought 
 in it, upon which it triumphs and is filled 
 with gratitude to God, good will to mankind 
 and a perfect desire to do and suffer all the good 
 acceptable and perfect will of God. Again. 
 
 Fourthly.... after all this is accomplished, 
 the soul sees and fetis in an niexpressible 
 manner, how little it knows, loves or enjoys 
 of God; and although no fear, (that hath tor- 
 ment) no darkness does now arise; there is 
 great humiliation before God. The soul dilates 
 and expands itself, and daily receives more 
 light, love, power, meekness, rest, life and 
 liberty ; this is growing in grace, and in the 
 knowledge of our Lord and saviour Jesus 
 Christ. 
 
( lis ; 
 
 Finally, when the corn is fully ripe, the 
 sickle is thrust in, and the spirit, returns to 
 God who gave it. 
 
 You will observe, that I say, this is the 
 ^d';2d'r^/ method of Gods working on the souls 
 he brings to glory. But particular incidents 
 may happen to different persons ; and there 
 are many things in the work of God (even in 
 our own souls) that we cannot account for, 
 much less, speak clearly concerning. Souls 
 may be differently awakened, as to the means 
 and measure, so also they may have clear or 
 faint manifestations as to the time of justifica- 
 tion. Again, some may abide months or 
 years in a state of peace and rejoicing, others 
 only days or hours. Moreover, some may be 
 more deeply awakened after justification than 
 others, their sense of sin may be more deep and 
 piercing; and this likewise may continue 
 longer or shorter according to various circum- 
 stances : Solomon '* could not tell the ivay 
 of the spirit^\ Christ inculcates the same 
 truth..,. John 3-8. Our duty and interest 
 then is; to search our heart, and commune 
 with our spirits ; and see if we are willing to 
 give up all and be sived in Gods own way. Let 
 
( 11» } 
 
 us never rest until every evil temper is des- 
 troyed, and our souls truly united to Jesus 
 Christ. Let us seek to know for ourselves, 
 that the Lord has created a clean heart in us, 
 and also renewed a right spirit within us ; and 
 then will follow, that divine affiance, that God 
 will keep us from every evil work, and pre- 
 serve us blameless to and for his heavenly 
 kingdom. 
 
 My love to the church of Christ at Lime- 
 rick, the Lord Jesus knows I love you all, 
 and earnestly pray that ye may be filled, yea and 
 abound with every good gift; that ye may be a 
 church without spot or wrinkle, or any such 
 thing ; at present my body is weak. But my 
 mind is stayed on God ; and I think, I feel 
 renewed strength of both body and mind when 
 I am presenting )x at the throne of grace, 
 which is my daily duty, and delight, farewell 
 My Dear Sister, I am Your Affectionate 
 Brother, THOMAS VVALSH„ 
 
 LETTER LVin. 
 
 Mr. Thomas Walsh.. ..to Mrs. Eliza Bennls. 
 London^ November 5, 1757 
 
 MY DEAR SISTER, BENNIS 
 
 YOU Must fight on still, Jesus will help 
 >ou, and faith will make all things possible. 
 
( 120 ) 
 
 We do not want the light of truth, so m 
 as the fire of love, practice will make a man 
 truly wise. John 7-1 7. If we want to know 
 our duty, let us do what we know, Christ's 
 word must remain forever true, and no other 
 will do as well. Now, saith he ** If any man 
 ** will come after me, let him deny himself, 
 and take up his cross daily*'. This is the way 
 to become and remain a disciple of Christ's. 
 To deny our senses is an arduous work, but to 
 deny our affections is more difficult still. 
 From the moment we intend to h^ perfect^ we 
 ought to examine ourselves in all things that 
 impede the spiritual life. O self-will and 
 pride, what a devil in human nature ihese ! 
 O beware of the^r^r motions, 
 
 I find less and less inclination to dictate to 
 others. Jesus Christ is the great teacher in 
 his church, O let us all learn of him. My 
 body is growing much weaker daily, but my 
 soul is hap' y^ happy ^ happy in my God. 
 
 May the Holy Ghost teach and assist 
 you to pray for me, and all the church of 
 God ; and may his fellowship be with you 
 forever more Amen. 
 
 THOMAS WALSH. 
 
( 121 ) 
 
 LETTER LIX. 
 Mr.Thoinas Olivers.. .to Mrs. Eliza Beiinis. 
 
 Clonmell^ April 25, 175/. 
 My VERY Dear Sister. 
 
 DO you continue as earnest with God for 
 
 your immortal souPs eternal happiness, as you 
 were when I last saw you ? O never rest 
 without that ** perfect love which casteth out 
 fear'', which are your desires after this, get- 
 ing stronger or weaker, examine your- 
 self; one or other must be the case ; for there 
 is no standing still in the ways of God. O 
 that you may so run as to obtain the prize 
 that is set before you ; which is no less than 
 glory ;make sure of the mark which is perfect 
 holiness, and then the prize is certain. Pray 
 much for an earnestness of spirit, and for a 
 constant sight of your wants. Seek the image 
 of God, as you did the favour of God, and it 
 will come as surely, and perhaps as instantane- 
 ously. *' It shall be unto you, according to 
 your faith''. Pray then, constantly pray, for 
 power to believe. Remeniber, there are giv- 
 en to all who believe, many exceeding great 
 and precious promises; that you may thereby 
 
 be made partaker of the Divine Nature, see 
 
 L 
 
C 122 ) 
 
 2d. Peter 1,4. In this sense, I may say, the 
 promise is to you, and to your children, and to 
 all who believe. Come,Comemy Dear sister ! 
 these bunches of spiritual grapes which you 
 often taste, plainly shew that the land of prom- 
 ise whereunto you are going is a good land ; 
 
 *' O that you might at once go up, 
 ** No more on this side Jordan stop, 
 ** But now the land possess. 
 
 " This moment end your legal 3'ears, 
 '• Sorrow and sin, and doubts and fears, 
 •' A howling wilderness". 
 
 be patient, be diligent, the tops of the towers 
 will soon appear, O look to your Joshua^ and 
 follow him, and he will surely bring you in. 
 Fear not the tall sons of Anack ; gigantic foes, 
 such as Pride, Unbelief, Anger, Self-will &c. 
 these are nothing to ihe omnipotent Jehovah 
 with whom you have to do as your captain. 
 Then fight and conquer through the strength 
 of the lamb, and victory is certain. Then 
 comes the great prize ! the treble crown! Glo- 
 ry ! Glory ! Glory I 
 
 O my Dear sister, does not this transport you- 
 Yours Affectionately 
 
 THOMAS OLIVERS 
 
( 123 ) 
 
 LETETR LX. 
 
 Mr. V/miam Penington....to Mrs Eliza Bennls. 
 
 Cork, yw72ff4, 1764. 
 I HOPE my Dear S ister Bennis is still 
 -imply following on to know the Lord j being 
 determined to know nothing but Christ, and 
 him crucified. To know what he did> suffer- 
 ed, and taught, that you may be fully conform- 
 ed both in heart and in life, yea in all things 
 to Christ your exalted head ; so shall you be 
 qualified to hold communion with him here, 
 and to be happy eternally with him hereafter. 
 I see no other way to live the life divine ; 
 J?yt by simple; yet actiy^ feith in Christ Tesus i 
 to go to him by faith every moment, for every 
 thing you want, whatsoever it is ; is the only 
 way to retain or increase life, and so far as 
 this is neglected, so far a soul will assuredly 
 suffer loss. Let not the Devil by any means 
 prevent your thus living from God, to God, 
 and for God, according to that precept, Re- 
 mans 12 chapter 1 and 2 verses. ...Do you find 
 it thus at all times ? Is your heart wholy takeiu 
 up with, and possessed by God ? Can you no'-^c 
 rejoice ever more, Pray without ceasing, 
 and in cverv thinfr oivc thanks ■ If j^ot, what 
 
( 124 ) 
 
 hinders ? O lay aside every weight, and the sin i 
 which doth most easily beset you, and look 
 steadfastly and constantly to Jesus the Author, 
 and he w ill be the support and the finisher o 
 }'our faith, and make you now, and ever more- 
 happy, which is the sincere and fervent prayer 
 v-'-rjuv Affectionate Brother 
 
 WILLIAM PENINGTON 
 
 LETTER LXI. 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Dt;nni3...to Mr. William Penington 
 Limerkk, June 10, 1764. 
 I AM truly thankful to my Dear Brother 
 Penincton, for your close and affectionate en- 
 quiries.... Blessed be my God, I hope I am 
 simply following on to know the Lord; and 
 think I arn determined to know nothing but 
 Christ and him crucified ; I long to be fully 
 conformed in heart, life, and all things to my 
 exalted head. I know that my Redeemer 
 liveth, and find him mdeed precious to my 
 soul. My way is often strewed with thorns, 
 but blessed be my God, I am enabled.to look 
 to the Qn(\^ and see my treasure laid up above. 
 Since I have lost you and brother Dillon, I 
 have learned to live wholly upon God, and 
 
(^ 125 } 
 
 :!o find him a supply for all my wants. You 
 ask, can I rejoice evermore, pray without 
 ceasing, and in every thing give thanks i In- 
 deed hitherto I ha"v'e been enabled in every 
 thing to give thanks; but am not able to pray 
 without ceasing ; I often find a heaviness of 
 spirit, a listless, stupid, inactive state, which 
 also damps my joy in the Lord, and brings 
 on sorrow and distress of soul ; my comforts 
 ebb and flow as the tide, and my py increases 
 and diminishes accordingly. 1 find much 
 cause of thankfulness, and wz/^/6 fjiiicb to be 
 ashamed of, but blessed be my God, hitherto 
 he hath helpedme ; and I find a degree of con- 
 fidence in him, that he will keep me to the 
 eyid. I think the sum of my desires is, to be 
 more closely united to him, and in compari- 
 son with this, all other things are as nothing, 
 and vanish from my view in a moment....! 
 'am weary of my wanderings, thoughtlesncss, 
 and stupidity, and would die to be delivered 
 from them. O when shall the time come, 
 when I shall love and enjoy my God without 
 intermission or alloy !...My Dear Brotlier^ 
 prav for me, and may the Lord establish vour 
 L 2 
 
( 126 ) 
 
 heart with grace, and make you useful to his 
 people... Your Affectionate Sister 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER LXII. 
 
 Mr. Thomas Taylor... to Mrs. EUza Bennis. 
 
 Dublin July 28, 1765. 
 MAY grace mercy and peace be mul- 
 tiplied unto my dear Sister Bennis from God 
 the father, and from the Lord Jesus Christ. 
 I trust you are in a better state of bodily 
 health, than when I left you.... Indeed ** all 
 things ijoork together for Good to them that 
 lo^e G<?^ "...Therefore as nothing comes by 
 chance, be assured of this ; that '* these light 
 afflictions luhich are but for a moment^ shall 
 wor/i out for you an exceeding and eternal 
 zveight Oj g lory \,. Glory my dear sister, glory! 
 floes not the very sound of that word transport 
 you ? how much more the realizing prospect. 
 Then let this encourage you, to bear these 
 fiery trials, which are not sent to consume, 
 but to purify the soul.i .God does not send 
 them as judgments on his children j ' no, they 
 are only like the rod of an indulgent father, 
 •v\'hich necessity constrains him to take... And 
 
 # 
 
( 127 ) 
 
 when we set our joyful feet, once on Canaans 
 happy shore, we shall with a pleasing aspect 
 turn our eyes and look back upon this tem- 
 pestuous sea, and ascribe our glorious deliver- 
 ance to our exalted Redeemer... We shall 
 then see that every trial has been sent by a 
 kind and tender hearted father who pitieth his 
 own children... So that we have reason to 
 bless the Lord for afflictions.... Undoubtedly 
 sin is the occasion of every disorder ; but al- 
 though it be, our divine master, can and does 
 bring good out of evil; but we see the grace 
 of God does not work a physical change upon 
 the body ; on the contrary that grace, taking 
 place in the heart, and bringing trouble upon 
 the mind, is very often the occasion of many 
 disorders ; and hence many I believe stifle 
 their convictions, by applying to the physi- 
 cians of the body, when the cause of com- 
 plaint is supernatural ; and the advice is fre- 
 quently to get into light, trifling company, or 
 join in those amusements, which only tend 
 to quench the spirit of God.... But blessed be 
 God, you have not so learned Christ, no, you 
 know into whose hands you have committed 
 
 m^ 
 
i, 128 ) 
 
 the keeping of your soul, and who has pro- 
 mised none shall pluck you out of his hands. 
 O live near to the captain of your salvation. 
 that you may be enabled to say. 
 
 " My cheerful soul, now all the day, 
 Sits waiting liere, and suigs ; 
 Looks through the ruins of her clay, 
 And practices her w/ngs. 
 
 " Faith almost changes into sight, 
 When from afur she spies; 
 Her fair inheritance in light. 
 Above created skies. 
 
 " The smiles ofheav'n rush sweetly in, 
 At all the gaping flaws ; 
 Visions of endless bliss are seen, 
 And native air she draws." 
 
 Thus may you sing your precious moments 
 away, while here below, until you shall be 
 called to Empyreal mansions; where ** tbc 
 ** wicked cease from troubling, aud the weary 
 " are at resf\ 
 
 Tried and tempted you must expect to be, 
 while in this vale of tears, but ^^ yet a little 
 " while'*'' and he that shall come^ will come, and 
 ^* will not tarry'\ O may he complete the 
 work of faith with power, enabling }'oii to re- 
 joice evermore, to pray without ceasing, and 
 
( 129 ) 
 
 in every thing to give thanks ; for this is the 
 will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. 
 
 I am now ready to take my farewell of Ire- 
 land, perhaps for ever ! O my God grant I 
 may be ready to take my farewell of this world 
 when it shall please >i?^c to call me home. 
 
 Indeed I find the necessity of keeping close 
 to the captain of my salvation, least after pre- 
 tending to preach to others, I myself should 
 become a cast-away. Here the soul is like the 
 thirsty earth, longing for the drops of rain. We 
 have not long to be in this miserable world ; 
 O may we continually be fighting our pas- 
 
 oagc tiuougn. i\nu wiiuc omers are worlc- 
 ing to get more and more into the world ; let 
 us labour to get out of it. There are many 
 temptations to draw us from God. The 
 Devil was obliged to hide himself in the ser- 
 pent in paradise, to execute his helish designs, 
 but he has a variety of more pleasing objects 
 now ; so that we have need continually to be 
 upon our guard ; my love to the church of 
 Christ at Limerick ; live near to God, love 
 one another; live in peace, and '*the God of 
 peace be with you all. evermore'' Amen. 
 
 THOMAS TAYLOR. 
 
( 130 ) 
 
 LETTER LXIir. 
 
 Mr. Richard Biackwell....io Mrs. Eliza Bennj-. 
 London^ October 23, 3 766, 
 PEACE be unto my Dear Sister Ben- 
 iiis, and to the whole Israel of God at Limer- 
 ick J absence of body does not, cannot, erase 
 any of you from my mind, while united by 
 Divine Love. 
 
 I trust you still live in the spirit of your glo- 
 rified head, Christ the Lord, growing up in 
 him ; in order to this, it is always needful to 
 Jiave a clear witness to the work already 
 wrought,both for stability and encouragement, 
 else in time of trial we should give way to un- 
 belief, and under the pressure of infirmities, 
 surrounded by the powers of hell, we should 
 utterly be discouraged. To Keep this wit- 
 ness, (which is the seal or earnest of our inhe- 
 ritance) how necessary to take up our cross 
 daily ; to be deaf to the voice of nature, and to 
 attend constantly to the teaching of the Divine 
 spirit. O let us go on, this is the way to 
 glory. Walk close with God, exercise your 
 faith for more grace, be zealous for the glory 
 of God, Attend to these things, and you shall 
 neither be barren nor unfruitful. 
 
( 131 ) 
 
 Let the select band meet regularly and con- 
 stantly; you know such meetings are pre- 
 cious times, for Jesus loves the simple in 
 heart, and they that are so, shall, with the be- 
 loved disciple, know the secrets of the Lord. 
 O may Jehovah encrease your faith, and pro- 
 tect you all in the arms of love, Prays Sec. ' 
 RICHARD BLACKWELL. 
 
 LETTER LXIV. 
 Mrs. I:Lliza Bennis...to Mr. Richard Blackwell. 
 Liinerick^ No-ceinber 27, 1766* 
 I AM thankful to my d^ar Brother Black- 
 well for his welcome letter, and truly thank- 
 ful to the Lord for bringing me to your Re- 
 membrance : The society her? is in a prospe- 
 rous situation, the select banddoes meet re- 
 gularly, and we generally have\lessed times 
 together.... As to my own state, \blessed be 
 my God, I am enabled through aVariety of 
 incidents to stay my soul on hito....I see 
 myself a poor helpless needy creatuVf, full of 
 wants, full of necessities which increa\e every 
 moment, and whilst I stand bemoan in grny self 
 they thicken all around me ; so that 1 a^ ob- 
 i liged to fly to my Jesus for refuge, bringing 
 ! \ 
 
 \ 
 
( 1-^2 ) 
 
 all my wants with me, and here alone do I 
 find solid footing, substantial happiness ; my 
 soul rejoices in his salvation, and would have 
 nothing, would be destitute, imperfect, defi- 
 cient, that his own free grace may have all 
 the glory. 
 
 In this sense my necessities and deficien- 
 cies makes my blessed Savour still more pre-^ 
 cious to my soul ; O what should I do without 
 such a Saviour ! Indeed I find something in 
 this exercise of soul, which I cannot find 
 words to explam, and which is above all others 
 unspeakably sweet to me ; but this is not al- 
 ways the case, m^ thoughts are often drawn 
 aside, and my attention taken up with trifles 
 and this not either seldom or short. I often 
 find slackness of Spirit, and heaviness of soul^ 
 which causes grief and sorrow of heart, 
 and ushers m many doubts ; and was it not 
 that the Lrrd gives the testimony of his spi- 
 rit to the «vork he has wrought in my heart, 
 I should be ready to give up all, but hither- 
 to the Lord my God hath kept me, and does 
 enable ne to trust in him for future grace. 
 
 I ajain request an interest in your prayers/ 
 and ail Your Affectionate 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. ' 
 
( 133 J 
 
 LETTER LXV. 
 Mr. Richard Blackwell....to Mrs. Eliza Bennis» 
 London^ February 10, 1767. 
 
 MY DEAR SISTER, 
 
 I AM glad to find the work of God pros- 
 pers in Limerick, and the select band con- 
 tinue to meet, I doubt not but God is with 
 you, fear not, go on ; it is a great blessing to 
 have such opportunities ; O let us improve 
 them. 
 
 I rejoice in your felicity in our Blessed 
 Lord, surely he takes pleasure in the prosper- 
 ity of his children... Does your faith increase? 
 by this you may judge, is your obedience en- 
 larged ? Faith cleaves to Christ, and embra- 
 ces the promises ; enabling the soul through 
 I every trial to surmount all difficulties, crying 
 out '^through Christ I can do all things*'^ Hold 
 fast the precious gift, being assured the end 
 of the commandment is love, out of a pure 
 heart ; have you not this testimony in your 
 heart? if so glory in the bleeding lamb. It 
 is an unspeakable blessing to obtain this wit- 
 ness ; to retain it requires close walking with 
 God.... But suppose any should lose it, let 
 them humble themselves before the Lord, and 
 M 
 
( 134 ) 
 
 he will restore it again.... Speak freely to each 
 other of these things, pertaining to the king- 
 dom of God.... Keep your zeal and simpUcity, 
 and our Lord will fulfiill in you all the good 
 pleasure of his will. ...Though your mind be 
 employed about many things, yet if your heart 
 cleaves to God, that is the point.... Go on to 
 perfection. Yours Affectionately 
 
 RICHARD BLACKWELL. 
 
 LETTER LXVL 
 
 Mr. Richard Bourkc... to lyTrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 W'.terford^ November 29, 1768. 
 
 MY VERY DEAR SISTER, 
 
 I TRUST you are growing up into 
 Christ in all things, as your living head. I 
 have often admired what the Apostle says of 
 himself, 2 Corinthians 12 chapter 9 and 10 
 verses : and indeed my soul longs for power 
 so to glory. But is not his request for the 
 Ephesians 3 chapter 16 to 19 verses far more 
 extraordinary, here is a most beautiful de- 
 scription of Christian perfection. My Dear 
 Friend let us press anziously after it, if it 
 were not attainable, it would not be set be- 
 fore us; do not waver, say not '*you have no 
 
( 135 ) 
 
 povver/^ your whole strength is in God, and 
 that is received every moment by simple faith ; 
 the good Lord strengthen you inthis good work* 
 I have just so much union with God, as 
 sets me longing for more. 
 
 '*0 who that loves can love enough !" 
 
 I am not without my trials ; I look for them 
 as my portion while in this tenement of clay ; 
 but they are all sweetened by the closer em- 
 braces of my gracious redeedmer, 1 read his 
 love as clearly in them, as in his manuscrint 
 of sun, moon, zT.i stars. I feel that God 
 tVould have us live bere the life of heaven; 
 that therefore we should as little as possible live 
 the life of earth. To live with him abstract- 
 ed from the world, delighting in all he causes 
 us to feel, and suffer ; under this happy influ- 
 ence acting according to our calling, and in- 
 cumbering ourselves with no more ; is to 
 walk with God ; this is to be dead, and to 
 have our lives hid with Christ in God. Let 
 us pray that we may inherit this, and I have 
 not the least doubt but we shall... .To sum 
 up all, being absorbed in God, satisfied 
 with his will. Blessed with his nature, gov- 
 erned by his spirit ,... this is christian perfec- 
 
C 136 J 
 
 tion, and this is fully attainable. Comt 
 Dear Sister let us join hand and heart i pray- 
 ftr and supplication ; never to rest 'till we at* 
 tain, ^^perfections height, The depth of hum- 
 ble love.*^*.Yours Affectionately 
 
 RICHAKDBQURKE. 
 
 LEiTEK LXVIL 
 
 Mr. John Dillon.,,. to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 MY DEAR 8XSTEX, 
 
 YOU reason too much for your own 
 happiness, O what powerful effects proceed 
 *' — ^ ^» Qnv thing: stronger 
 ixom simple s i Q^w\i^i<^^ ----■■ y 
 than simple love; can there be any thing more 
 powerful than simple faith, try these medi- 
 cines, prove them, you will find them the 
 most effieatious for your disorder. 
 
 " Believe and all your sins forgiven^ 
 ** Only believe and yours is heaven". 
 
 *VBeit (saith our Lord) unto you even a^i 
 thou wilt.'' O my dear sister, who would not 
 love the Lord Jesus ? come join with me and 
 let us say ; '* O Lord here are our hearts, do 
 thou work in them to will and to do all thy 
 good pleasure.'' " We sink by dying lov( 
 compelled. And own thee conqueror" 
 My dear friend all is yours only believe. 
 Your Affectionate, 
 
 JOHN DILLON. 
 
( 137 ) 
 
 LETTER LXVIII. 
 
 Mr. John Dillon.. ..to Mrs Eliza Bennis 
 Ditb/in, September 15, 1764. 
 
 I REJOICE that my dear sister's late 
 severe aiSiction of body, has been sanctified 
 to your souls benefit, this is the end God 
 has in view in afflicting, !)lesscd be his name 
 that you have been made sensible of it, and 
 that }'ou feel you now walk more comfortable^ 
 and your mind more stayed on that gracious 
 God who heared prayer on j^our behalf.... 
 Consider your self as restored from the dead 
 and therefore once more placed in a proba- 
 tionary state, and O let your future days be 
 spent to the glory of God ; your duty is made 
 your benefit, your performance a delight, and 
 the recompence of reward is placed before 
 you, as a mark for perseverance.... O let us 
 go on to perfection, 'till it is crowned with 
 glory ; Let me ask my dear friend ; is not 
 the comfort you now enjoy, received by si?n- 
 ple faith in and from a God of love ? this is 
 the medicine I so often recommended, and as 
 you have now proved its efficacy, have con- 
 stant recourse to it... But you still complain of 
 M2 
 
{ 138 ) 
 
 your short-comings, un watchfulness, forget- 
 fulness, coldness and stupidity ; it is a great 
 mercy you are sensible of these, and the sight 
 of them ought to create thankfulness to him 
 who sheweth them to you.... But are you not 
 the cause of an increase of these upon yourself. 
 
 First.... You see your short-comings! are 
 they not increased by looking on them so long, 
 instead of looking to Christ, who is the propi- 
 tiation. 
 
 Second. ..Your unw-atchful spirit ; is it not 
 irxreased, by turning your eye upon, and 
 reasoning wath it, instead of instantly looking 
 to, and calling on the Lord for wisdom to 
 discern Satans devices. 
 
 Third.. .Is not your forgetfulness increased, 
 by reasoning with,and saying "how can these ' 
 things be consistent" &.c. Do you not plain- 
 ly see while you do this, you are in a greater 
 degree adding to that forgetfulness, by forget- 
 ing to look to the Lord Jesus and his promis- 
 es. 
 
 Fourth... Your coldness will never be re- 
 moved by looking at it, but by looking on 
 the Lord, whose bowels of mercy, are open 
 
C 13y ; 
 
 to all his tempted followers, and has promised 
 to make away for their escape, and 
 
 Fifdi...Your stupidity will be encreased if 
 you look to any thing but Christ alone : ihen 
 it is the highest pitch of it to reason ; ponder 
 and look at these, when relief can be found 
 in none but the friend of sinners. 
 
 My dear Sister.... It is not the expecting, 
 to have these done away, and so coming to 
 Christ (is the way) but to look to him by sim- 
 ple faltby and the beholding him as he is pre- 
 cious to the believing soul, dispels all those 
 and ten thousand more at once... .Does not 
 your heart bear me witness in this ? when you 
 behold Christ Jesus, do not all fly before his 
 face, and your soul remain in perfect peace 
 and love.... Then instead of looking on these 
 again, as in time past : look simply to the 
 Lord Jesus and you will draw water sufficient 
 out of the well of salvation ; only hold fast the 
 rope of the huckeU,. (simple faith) 
 
 Yours most Affectionately 
 
 JOHN DILLON. 
 
( HO ) 
 
 LETTKR LXIX. 
 Mr. Jbhii Dillon. ..to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 Dublin^ June 1, 176J 
 I AM thankful to God that my dear Sis- 
 ter Bennis finds herself enabled to call him 
 lier t.ord and her God, then all the promises 
 of God are yours; yea when Christ is yours, 
 <7//is yours, if you can only believe j the more 
 grace and light we receive, the more VvC see 
 of our own weakness and nothingness, this 
 iays us low at the feet of Christ... yet take care 
 that you do not look at your weakness so as 
 to take your eye off of Christ, who is our ad- 
 vocate, who ever liveth to make intercession 
 for us; but rather let it fill us with thankflil- 
 ness, for that heavenly light which shews us 
 what we are, and in whom is our strength ; 
 also take heed that you do not trust to, and 
 strive to live by, comforts, and so not be sat- 
 isfied without you feel that degree of them 
 which you may measure to yourself; this of- 
 ten hurts simple minds... Our life is to be a 
 life ol faith tried in the fire ; ^ve are called to 
 be good soldiers ofChrist enduring hardships 
 resisting the Devil, quenching all his fiery 
 darts. • .Now this is not to be done by comfort^, 
 
( 141 ) 
 
 but by faith the christians shield; though 
 your heart, be entirely given up to God, y^t 
 you xvill find yourself tried to the very quick 
 and you may be kept In a ferment, for want 
 of wisdom to discover the hellish plots of Sa- 
 tan who if he cannot destroy, will strive to 
 torment you ; but you arc not called to Rea- 
 son, but simply to look and cast vour burden 
 upon the Lord, who will make all yourene- 
 mies as chaff. Your Affectionate 
 
 JOHN DILLON. 
 LETTER LXX7 
 
 Mr. jonn i^!.*on..Mto Mrs. £!*!!:» ^e»n:s: 
 Cork, September 26,, ir66* 
 My Dear Sister Bcnnis's letters are al- 
 ways a blessing to me, your experience in so 
 many instances tallies with vay own ; your 
 case **in coming to God though a cloud be- 
 tween, yet without condemnation;^' has ofte^ 
 been my state ; and there is no other way at 
 such times, but to lay ourselves at the feet of 
 our Lord, and like King Hezekiah spread our 
 letter of complaint before Him, who will be a 
 present help in all times of need, and we have so 
 often proved him such, that we have no right 
 
C 1^2 ) 
 
 to doubt for the future*... If poor Sister B. has 
 been drawn aside, cast her not off, nor use 
 harsh words, take St. PauPs advice, Galatians 
 6 chapter, and 1 verse, for Gentleness Meek-, 
 ness and Love, with a povicrful quantity of 
 the prayer of Faith, are the only efficatious 
 medicine in this Disorder. 
 
 O what a happiness, to^ be enabled at all 
 times to say, that God is yours and you are 
 his ! a privilege, few of the Kings or princes 
 of the Earth do, or ever did enjoy, and which you 
 never can be sufficiently thankful for... Now, the 
 Glorious hght from on high, attended by-j 
 heavenly wisdom, will discover to you the^ 
 snares and wiles of the crooked serpent, and 
 the rough places (occasioned by unbelief), 
 shall be made smooth. Let not my Dear 
 Friend no'm begin to reason but stand fast in 
 the liberty wherein God hath called you ; In- 
 firmaties vou will feel, inconsistencies vou 
 will meet with, while in this clay tenement, 
 but pass them by and go straight to GdcI, he, 
 can reconcile all inconsistencies, he can solve 
 all doubts : do thou only Belie've, ivatch, Prayy 
 Yours, most Sincerely, 
 
 JOHN DILLON. 
 
( 143 ) 
 
 LETTEK LXXr. 
 Mr. John Dillon.. to Mrs. Eliza Bennib. 
 
 Dublin, May, 1770, 
 
 I HAVE got my self bolstered up in bed 
 
 to write a last farewell to my dear dear Sister 
 
 Bennis, (if strength will permit ;) I am worn 
 to a skeleton, and generally in great pain, but 
 
 blessed be God, he is my all in all : my soul 
 
 is happy in him, and I testify with my latest 
 
 breath that " / bavc not followed a cunningly 
 
 devised fabl€\^^ but that there is reality ,nay^(7/if/ 
 
 happiness in the religion of Jesus. O my dear 
 
 friend how could I now support without him; 
 
 he is precious ! he is precious! he is all- together 
 
 lovely ! my soul longs to be set free, that I 
 
 may enjoy him in full glory... well ; a few 
 
 hours will complete my happiness* 
 
 " Hark they whisper, Angels say, 
 *• Sister Spirit come away !". 
 •' Lend, lend your wings I mount I fly ! 
 " O Grave where is thy victory ? 
 •* O Death where is thy sting'*. 
 
 My Dear Sister, I am transported^ I now 
 see the goodly land in view, and it delights 
 me so, that I am ready to rush into the nar- 
 row sea between. My last love, my last admo" 
 nition, to the society in Limerick ; they 
 
( 144 ) 
 
 have been dear to me, they have my last fee- 
 ble prayers, that God may keep them in the 
 hollow of his hand, and make them " all glo- 
 rious 'witbiriy^* tell them, I am now going to 
 give an account of my mission to them, to 
 him who sent me ; and O how grievous if I 
 must appear as a witness against any of them 
 in the great day! Lord Jesus forbid it, 
 
 I cannot go on, my strength fails : My 
 Dear, Dear^ Dear Sister Bennis fareivell^ 
 may that Lord and God which is now my all 
 in all, by his grace protect you ; may his 
 power preserve you, may his wisdom guide 
 you, and his everlasting arms be forever un- 
 derneath yoU; and hold you up to the end, 
 then our next meeting will beat the right hand 
 of Jesus. O that blessed Jesus whom we have, 
 so often conversed about, and whose love is^ 
 now drawing the chief of Sinners to himself! 
 I dont know where or how to end, I could die 
 avriting of his love, but they drag the pen from 
 me, a last and again farewell. 
 
 JOHN DILLON. 
 
 N. B. 11% died foiip hours after concluding this letter 
 
( 145 ) 
 
 LETTER LXXIL 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis...to Mr. Hugh Saunderson 
 Limerick December 4, 1771' 
 IT gives me sincere pleasure to hear that 
 my dear Brother Saunderson's soul prospers ; 
 my heart's desire for you is, that you may 
 stand fast as a good soldier of Jesus Christ; 
 you have need of watchfulness on every side, 
 because the enemy will turn himself into ma- 
 ny shapes, if by any means he may (by force 
 or fraud) turn you out of the way,... Your last 
 letter gave me much satisfaction j I am thank- 
 ful to God on your behalf, that you do find 
 him a present help, and are enabled to give 
 yourself up to his will... I do not forget you 
 at the throne of grace; it is matter of encour- 
 agement that you are punctual to the days and 
 hours we appointed for this purpose, conti- 
 nue so, and be assured that you shall meet me 
 there ; the Lord loves to see his children im^ 
 portunate with him for each other. 
 
 " I'll bow my knee to God in pray'r, 
 • ■ For you, and liope to meet you tliere, 
 ■ On tlie same errand for your friend, 
 '• That both our prayers mav one asceiid. 
 
( 14S ) 
 
 " While thus >ve seek the things abwe, 
 " And faith iul to each other prove, 
 " In friendship's sacred power we taste, 
 " Delights which shall forever last." 
 
 Blessed be God, my soul does prosper. I 
 think I do love the Lord my God, with all 
 my heart ; and am by his grace enabled to 
 chose him as my oi;rly portion and inheritance, 
 and to give myself unreservedly to his will. 
 I constantly meet with obstructions of various 
 kinds, but a merciful God sustains my fee- 
 ble soul, wonderfully clears my way, and gra- 
 ciously condescends to be my guide : indeed 
 it is by his all powerful grace alone that I am 
 upheld ; he constantly proportioning his 
 strength to my great need ; for he knows I 
 cannot, nor do not desire, to stand one mo- 
 ment without him. My soul hangs on him, 
 and desires no other support, and am deter- 
 mined by his grace to follow him wheresoever 
 he shall lead me.... I hope this is also your 
 determination; O give yourself up without 
 reserve to him, he knows best how to dispose 
 of you... You are often on my mind, and I 
 then wish for past opportunities, to speak 
 plain and without reserve ; but can only pray 
 that the Lord himself would be to you instead 
 
( 147 ) 
 
 of a friend ; that he would shew you all that 
 is wrong, and keep you in the right way. I am 
 at times jealous over you, least your heart 
 should be drawn aside after the creature, or 
 taken up too much with yourself.... This idol 
 oV^is the worst of all enemies to the soul, O 
 guard against it ; watch not only every mo- 
 tion of your heart, but of your mind, thoughts, 
 desires, and even of your body ; there is a 
 certain gesture, or air in walking, sitting, or 
 conversing; or in coming in and going out; 
 which is not becoming a preacher of the gos- 
 pel, whose "mhole department should always 
 be free from every thing that looked like self 
 confidence, self esteem, pride or foppery. I 
 had some objections to you in respect of these, 
 when you were here ; but having said so 
 much to you then about other things ..I was 
 afraid were I to add these, you would think 
 me too severe ; but finding since, that others 
 took notice of the same, I have been troubled 
 that I did not speak ; as I know you will re- 
 ceive it from me- in love... The Lord knows 
 I have no motive but your welfare, and should 
 be thankful to you to deal in the same man- 
 ner by me ; do receive it as from your friend. 
 
C 148 ) 
 
 kiid be thankful for a friend... You will meet 
 with many who will turn aside and laugh at 
 your little fciables ; but few, 'Dcryfenx)^ will be 
 faithful enough to point them out, and warn 
 you of them.... This, and this only, is the 
 friendship my heart approves ; nor can I call 
 that person my friend, who could withhold 
 reproof where he saw I needed it... My Dear 
 Friend, watch ovtr your own spirit, and ob- 
 serve ^'^z^r 0^71 conduct, and let nothing pass 
 unheeded by you ; your youth, your natural 
 prcpensit}' to gaiety and sprightliness, your 
 unmarried slate, and the pride oFyour own 
 heart ; will insensibly incline you to little fop- 
 peries in gesture and dress, and little niceties 
 about yourself; which will hurt your own soul, 
 lessen your usefulness, and make you ridicu- 
 lous to others, if not guarded against.... Now 
 don't let the enemy represent this my freedom 
 in a wrong light, but pray that the Lord 
 would shew you yourself^ and save you from 
 yourself^ I could say much more, were you 
 present, but I forbear; may the Lord instruct 
 you, and lead you into all truth, prays your 
 
 Sincere friend 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
( 149 ) 
 
 LETTER LXXIII 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis....to Mr. John Christian. 
 Limerick, October 20, 17/1. 
 MY Dear Brother Christian's lettci-' 
 brought welcome news ; the Waterford soci- 
 ety is dear to me, and am happy at their pros- 
 perity ; may the Lord increase the welfare 
 of Zion... I am thankful to my God, for en= 
 abling me to either speak or write any thing, 
 that has in any wise been helpful to you ; by 
 this we may see the great benefit of christian 
 communion, and how agreeable to the will 
 of God. We are not only called to confess 
 our sins to each other, but also to tell our 
 temptations ; else how can we pray for each 
 other ? Satan wiil present a thousand pruden- 
 tial reasons, why we should keep these things 
 to ourselves, but I never knew any good 
 proceed from it; on the contrary we may re- 
 mark that often whilst we are speaking or 
 writing to our friend, the doubt is resolved, 
 or the temptation removed, which should be 
 an encourigement never to keep the Devils 
 secrets. 
 
 I think you have 9:reat reason to praise th(i 
 Lord, that he does not suiTer you to speak 
 N 2 
 
( ^50 ) 
 
 for him in vain ; O be thankful, be hum- 
 ble, and be satisfied with all his dispensa- 
 tions, be assured they are all in love, how- 
 ever afflictive or distressing ;... the stubborn- 
 ness of our nature often requires these bitter 
 medicines, and how kind is it to force them 
 on us, even against our will, rather than let 
 us die of the disease. An attentive mind 
 will feel the health which these impart, 
 though unpleasant in the using. Indeed I have 
 often considered the Lord, as a wise physi- 
 cian over his own family of children ; who at- 
 tentively examines into their several constitu- 
 tions ; and at proper times administers Phy- 
 sic, or Cordials, or Bitter draughts, according 
 as each have need ; the ignorant child per- 
 haps frets and cries, and refuses the ill tasted 
 draught ; and thinking the parent unkind to 
 offer it, often persists in a stubborn refusal, 
 until his parent is obliged to use the Rod, 
 whilst his own heart yearns over the child, 
 but it is to save his life ; therefore the child 
 must not be spared 'till he submits. Cor- 
 dials are pleasant, and children would be al- 
 ways livmg on what is sweet and pleasant 
 to the taste but we knoAV nothing is more 
 
( 151 ) 
 
 unwholesome. Will not the comparison hold ? 
 Then surely it is our wisdom to leave our- 
 selves and all our affairs in his hands, w^ho 
 alone is able to help us, and knows what is 
 best for us ; but let us in all things say, 
 **Lord I will not choose, because thou can- 
 not err;" I know this is a hard lesson, but 
 we have a divine teacher, and with him all 
 things are possible. O that we may never 
 grow weary, let us pray for this.... Your tru- 
 ly Affectionate Friend, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER LXXtV. 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis,....to Mr. John Christian. 
 Lnnericky March 29, 1772, 
 
 DEAR BROTHER CHRISTIAN 
 
 I FEAR you have mistaken some of our 
 late conversation ; since our first acquaintance 
 I have had no reason to think you of a conten- 
 tious spirit, quite the contrary ; what I then said 
 was merely by way of caution, as I know it 
 is quite natural for us to speak as we think ; 
 and as your thoughts in some respects differ 
 from Mr. Wesley's, you may be apt to pro- 
 mulge your own opinions rather than his; 
 
which would certainly lessen you in the es- 
 teem of all the sensible part of youe hearers, 
 and be a cause of much disputation to the ig- 
 norant, tho' sincere. Indeed I do not see how 
 you can find your mind clear to require or ac- 
 cept a travelling station among the Methodists 
 while you hold any opinion contrary to our 
 professed doctrines, neither can I see how 
 Mr. Wesley will be justifiable in sending you 
 forth under such circumstances; and as I must 
 act according to my conscience, I have told 
 him so. Whatever opinions a private mem. 
 her, or even a local preacher may hold. I think 
 it is essential a traveling preacher should be 
 clear ^ sounds and orthodox; yet these my 
 thoughts do by no means lessen my esteem 
 for you, nor my belief that you may be useful 
 where you are. I am rather persuaded in 
 opinion that whilst you retain the same fervor 
 with which you set out, the Lord will bless 
 and own you. But be humble, be simple, be 
 satisfied to be taught by God, and by his expe- 
 rienced servants : be open to conviction, and 
 the Lord will t^ach you what you know not. 
 As to yoTir jnfts, I shall only say, 1 have al- 
 ways observed, that it was not the gifts c" 
 
( 153 ) 
 
 rfie preacher that converted the muhitude ; 
 but rather the heart of the preacher. This 
 expression I know would not go down with 
 some, but through a long course of experi- 
 ence, I have ahvays seen that gifts and grace 
 are two things ; when both meet they appear 
 very amiable, but the gracious soul wlio has 
 nothing of his own, but what he by faith draws 
 down from the heart of Christ every moment; 
 shall prosper both in his soul and in his la- 
 bours ; how hard is it to have great gifts 
 without being sensible of them ? but the soul 
 who feels its littleness, and knows its need, 
 will be constrained to do as the old papist, 
 woman, who lost her beads, saying, **now I 
 have nothing to depend on but the Lord Je- 
 sus;" these are the r^m^ boms which the 
 Lord still uses and honours in his work. 
 
 As to your temptations, I think you give 
 too much way to the enemy ; if you are wil- 
 ling to leave father and mother, wife and 
 children for Christ's sake ; what greater proof 
 can you give that you love him better than 
 they ? and if he calls you to a greater or far- 
 ther proof, are you not ready ? do you find 
 them as idols in your heart ? do they usurp 
 
( 15^ ) 
 
 the place that Christ should have ? if not why 
 do you dispute with the enemy ; if they do why 
 do you cease crying to him that is able to deli, 
 ver. Is the matter doubtful ? so that you cannot 
 conclude on either side ; then cry mightily and 
 unceasingly to the Lord, that he would answer 
 for himself, and bear his own testimony to his 
 own work ; let non^ baffle you out of this ; it 
 is certainly yo^i' privilege to knonx} the things 
 that arc freely given to you of God ; and how 
 shall we know them, but by the light of his 
 own spirit, shining on his work in our hearts \ 
 that sane light which first discovered our own 
 darkless, and pointed us to the attoneing blood, 
 and then clearly shew^ed us our interest in 
 Christ i the same light I say, discovers our 
 inbred sin, and also our deliverance from it; 
 and not only so, but lights us all our way. 
 'till we are brought to glory. This is the 
 glorious privilege of the children of God, it 
 is your privilege and mine ; why should we 
 stop short, the way is plain, it is only attain- 
 ded by sim.ple faith ; and should the enemy 
 object, "you have not this faith;" will you 
 stand and dispute it with him ?...No, but 
 lx)ok up, and say I cannot dispute, but I will 
 
C ^^o ) 
 
 ?ww believe, and take Christ as my complete 
 Saviour ; my all in time, and Eternity. O be- 
 lieve and surely you shall be established, 
 now believe and you shall be made whole. 
 The natural affection you feel for your v^ife 
 and children, and the yearnings of your heart 
 at times towards them is no proof against you, 
 the highest degree of grace does not de- 
 stroy natural affection, nor even the tenderest 
 feelings ; no it rather tenders the heart, and 
 makes it more susceptible of these, so that 
 the masculine spirit who before felt no affec- 
 tion for a wife or children, when it receives 
 the grace of God is changed into love and 
 tenderness ; then may we not suppose, as a 
 person advances in grace and increase in love 
 to God, that his love to these will also in- 
 crease ; it certainly does, and I think accord- 
 ing to the nature of things, it cannot be other- 
 ^' wise. This often brings painful sensations to 
 the mind of one under your circumstances, 
 and makes absence very trying; then the accu- 
 ser comes in, to avail himself of our weak- 
 ness ; and brings showers of accusations, 
 when the Lord does not accuse ; but let us 
 not be ignorant of his devices ; he is still the 
 
( I-^^ ) 
 
 accuser of the brethren, and all his fiery darts 
 are quenched by simple faith. 
 
 I am obliged to conclude abruptly.... You> 
 sincere friend. 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER LXXV. 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis...to Mr. John Christian. 
 Limerick^ Octuher 22, 1773. 
 I AM truly sorry, that any thing should j 
 damp my dear Brother Christians earnest df - | 
 sires, after the full and perfect enjoyment of 
 God. Truly they that will follow Christ, must 
 take up his cross, must bear his reproach ; 
 and suffer the scandle of the cross, and the 
 nearer they would come to him, the deep- 
 er they must drink of his cup. ...But all can- 
 not receive this ; many are willing to follow 
 him while he is well spoken of, and had in 
 repute ; but do not choose to own him when 
 he is evil treated..,. Many followed him with 
 loud hosannahs Vvhen he rode in triumph 
 
 into Jerusalem ; but where were these, when 
 he stood buffeted and spit upon, in a most 
 contemptable figure before Pilate ? perhaps 
 among the multitude which cried... **away 
 ^vith him, crucify him !" yet in that posture 
 
( 1^7 ) 
 
 as a condemned malefactor, scorned by his 
 enemies, and forsaken by his friends; be- 
 smeared with dirt, spit upon and beaten ; a 
 spectacle to men and devils! he was indeed 
 the very Jesus who was transfigured on the 
 mount; and who ascended gloriously into 
 Heaven in the sight of his disciples ; who is 
 no\^at the right hand of God, and **who ev- 
 er liveth to make Intercession for us." His 
 sufferings made no alteration in his person, 
 office or dignity, he was still the same, ^*God 
 over all, Blessed for-evermore."...And will 
 not the comparison hold ? let my friend make 
 the application.... It is much to be lamented, 
 that Jesus still meets with the deepest wounds, 
 in the house of his friends ; and at such times 
 who will venture to stand by him ? I say who? 
 Blessed be God there are some who 
 dare profess his truths in the face of every 
 opposition;... and can set to their seal, that 
 He is true... Indeed I cannot help wondering 
 how the Devil blinds the eyes of even the 
 most sensible part of mankind; and what is 
 worse, even of the dear childrc n of God; and is 
 it not a reproach on tlicir v/isdom and under- 
 .standing, to be so easily drawn aside b;- -he 
 
( 1-58 ) 
 
 subtle reasonings of the enemy, uhich you 
 yourself have heard confuted a thousand times ; 
 may I not say, %vhich you yourself have 
 often confuted ; and which the spirit of God 
 has repeatedly maade as clear to you,g the 
 noonday... If we were to judge of the doctrine 
 by the lives of some professors, we should ex- 
 plode justification as well as sanctification ; 
 and if it hold good in the one, it should also 
 in the other... Otherwise Judas being a traitor, 
 would prove Christ an impostor,.. But sup- 
 pose nine out often who profess sanctification, 
 turned apostates, it could not make the word 
 of God of none effect ; if this be reall)* the pri- 
 vilege of God's children, and purchased for 
 them by the blood of Christ... Some having 
 made shipwreck of the faith and a good con- 
 science, is no proof that the rest are deceived; 
 If any who do profess it, do not evidence it b}* 
 their lives, it proves that such are deceived ,' 
 but it proves no more. If some who profess 
 it, did for some time walk in the light of Gods 
 countenance, but are now turned aside, "like 
 the dog to his vomit;'' this does not prove 
 that there is no such state. But it proves 
 th*t this blessing as w^ell as justification is on 
 
( 159 ) 
 
 ly retained by constant watchfulness and pray- 
 er.. .And it proves that without this, a person 
 in that state, may as certainly fall, as Adam 
 did in paradise, or the angels in Heaven. 
 But it does not prove, that there is no such 
 state to be attained; no more than Adam's fall 
 proves that there was no such place as para- 
 dise, or the Angel's lull that there v/as no such. 
 place as Heaven. In all the persecutions 
 which the Christians underwent for the sake 
 of Christ, many sealed the truth v/ith their 
 blood; but there was also many apostates wlio 
 brought a scandal on the cause ; and shall we 
 look and point at these, and bring them as a 
 proof that therestwere deceived, and died in a 
 bad cause ; or shall we bring the multitude of 
 Ahtinomians, who at present hold the truth 
 in unrighteousness to prove that Faith in 
 Christ, is the most dangerous of all errCTs. 
 ' ' My Dear Friend bear with me, and suffer 
 genuine, naked, simple Truth, to find its way 
 to your heart; consider your calling, it is a 
 great thing to be employed for God ; howe\er 
 the hearers may plead ignorance, I cannot 
 think the preacher should. I acknowlege 
 
( 160 ) 
 
 myself insufficient in every respect to defend 
 so great a truth, should I not rather apply to 
 you as a teacher in Israel? for the explanation 
 of the many texts in scripture which point at, 
 and promise such a state... In the Old Testa- 
 ment there are many, and in all the prophesies 
 qUMs glorious gospel day, this entire rectitude 
 of heart is particularly spoken of.... But if \Ve 
 would pay a greater attention to the Ne>v 
 Testament; if this is given to us as the rule i 
 of our faith and practice, and (may I not add) ! 
 as the great Charter of ca\y profession, by i 
 ^hich Vv'e shall be either cleared or condemn- 
 ed in the great Day ; does it not concern us, 
 to search and try every page, and see if these 
 things be really so or not... It is very remark- 
 able that the strongest expression in all the 
 Scripture is used by our Lori himself... In- 
 deed I do not think that any other would 
 even dare to use it, Matthev/, 5 & 48. Be 
 ye perfect^ even as your Father u^hich is ' in 
 Heaven is perfect, ^^ and Verse 8 *' Blessed 
 are the pure in heart, ''^ and John 17 & 17 -he 
 prays, *' Sanctify them through thy truths 
 The Appostle Paul in the 2nd. Corinth- 
 
ians 7 Sc 1. advises, ^' Hamng therefore 
 these promises^ let us cleanse oursehes from 
 all filthincss of the flesh and. spirit, perfecting 
 holiness in the fear of God' \.,vind Hebrews 
 10 & 14. '* Follow peace with all men^ and 
 holiness, ivithout which no man shall sec the 
 Lord','' and 1st Peter 1 &: 15. '' But as 
 be which hath called you is holy, so be ye holy, 
 because it is written, be ye holy, for lam holy,'' 
 also 1st John 1 & 7 ** If we walk in the light 
 as be is in the light, we ha^Dc fellowship one 
 with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ 
 his son cleanseth us from all si?i," and verse 
 9th '' he is faithful and just toforgi'oetisour 
 sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteous- 
 ^iiess",»*JM.2iTiy more texts might be quoted 
 to prove the. same thing; namely that it is 
 'both our duty and privilege to love the Lord 
 our God with all our heart, and soul, and 
 
 % mind, arid strength ; which is only Avhat is 
 implied in the terms Holiness, perfection, or 
 ^anctification....But if this be not the blessing- 
 pointed at in the above texts, I would ask 
 what other blessing is meant? Avoiikl you 
 
 . answer a justified state ; then I would ask, 
 
 docseveryjustified person feel that he is pure 
 O 2 
 
( 162 ) 
 
 ii* heart ? I say ^"o^ry justified person, for if 
 these are the blessings consequent on justifir 
 cation, then they are common to every be- 
 liever, and should be the marks by which 
 they should try their faith ; and if this was 
 the case, how few, how very few believers 
 should we have left.... Most of the believers I 
 have ever met with, have been deeply con- 
 vinced of the impurity of their hearts, the un- 
 holiness of their tempers, and natural bias 
 that is in them to evil ; until the Lord by the 
 great word of his power creates all anew.... 
 x^Vnd why is it that the Lord does discover 
 this root of bitterness to every believer, and 
 puts a ciy in their hearts for a total deliver- 
 ance J with a promise that he will save to the 
 uttermost even as far as their faith can reach P 
 If my Friend never felt this plague of his own 
 heart since his justification, I heartily con- 
 gratulate him, and wish he never may ; but 
 if he feels his malady, why does he lose time 
 looking to those who are strayed into by 
 paths ; Jesus the good physician calls aloud ; 
 ** Look unto me, and be sai)ed*^ O let him 
 not call in vain. Prays your most sincere 
 Friend, '^^ 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
( 163 ) 
 
 LETETR LXXVI. 
 
 Lieutenant Charles Jones.. to Mrs. Eliza Bennis 
 Diibrm, December^ 17, 1770, 
 Dear Madam, 
 
 YOUR former letters have often afforded 
 solid comfort, and served as so many kind 
 monitors to awaken my drowsy powers, and 
 to confirm me in that great truth, that there 
 is no true happines out of Christ ; and that 
 virtue never fails of an ample reward....! am 
 at present as a ship tossed on the Ocean, the 
 port of rest often presents itself to view, but 
 sudden gusts of inbred evils drive it from 
 my sight ; and like a heedless pilot I am ready 
 to be hurried on the rocks of inevitable ruin; 
 O were it on the Rock Christ, I should then 
 be broken indeed ! but into a pleasing contri- 
 tion of spirit, which God will not dispise. 
 Although I feel not, that ardent desire of close 
 communion I formerly did with . the children 
 of God, witness my heart, I still love and res- 
 pect them, above any people on Earth ; and 
 never fail to offer up my earnest petitions for 
 the prosperity ofZion. 
 
 It appears as if providence intended I should 
 not quit the Army yet, every prospect out of 
 
it seems dismal and dreary with fespect to 
 my family ; I have therefore thought best 
 to continue as I am, 'till I can see my way 
 more clear for a change. 
 I am Dear Madam, yom' assured Friend, 
 And unworthy Brother 
 
 CHARLES JONES. 
 
 LETTER LXXVn. 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis...to Lieutenant Charles Jones. 
 Li?nerick, Jaunary 3, 1771. 
 Let it not displease my Dear Brother 
 Jones, if I should acknowlege, that I often 
 think of you with some degree of distress. 
 My fears for you are many. ...when we give 
 way to slackness, what have we not to fear ? 
 You did run well : what has hindered ? The 
 bewitching allurements of a transitory world ! 
 Alas, with what a drudgery are these purchas- 
 ed, and how foolish a barter for Chrisf and 
 Heaven : But these I trust are not already, 
 or alltogether forfeited. You do certainly in- 
 tend sometime or other to stir yourself up... 
 to seek the Lord.. .to recover all you have lost ; 
 and to continue faithful to his grace. ' But O 
 
( 165 ) 
 
 remember the fate of the foolish virgins', 
 just in your state ; their lamps not quite, but 
 almost extinguished ; whilst they slept in this 
 state, the cry was made ! their oil spent, and 
 their doom irrevocably sealed. May the 
 Lord forbid that this should be my friends 
 case ! But is there not cause to fear ? We 
 may plan and contrive to bring about our own 
 purposes in life, but whilst we are thus busi- 
 ly employed, the Lord may suddenly bring 
 his to pass, and say, '•^ Thou fool, this night 
 is thy soul required of thee.'^' This indeed is 
 an alarming thought ! O, what shall it profit 
 then, to have gained all we desired, if our 
 own desires are made our Curse, But have I 
 said too much ? I hope not. I trust you can 
 yet bear plain, honest dealing, from one who 
 indeed loves your soul, and earnestly desires 
 your true happiness. No, my Dear Brother 
 ,. Jones, be not offended... the Lord knows v/hat 
 I feel for you, even now whilst I am writing. 
 Indeed I am thankful on your behalf that the 
 Lord has hitherto kept you from outward sin ; 
 but surely I need not say to you, that this will 
 not do. The servant in the gospel was con- 
 d'-^nmed as wicked, only for his slothfulness, 
 
( ^66 ) 
 
 he had not squandered his Lords money, he 
 kept it safe, and had it to produce. Is this 
 our case ? Have we even kept his grace... has 
 my friend kept it ? Has not his heart depart- 
 ed from the Lord in search of other things.... 
 (Riches, Honour, Titles) to the neglect of 
 those very means which your ovm conscience 
 approves, and which have been so often bless- 
 ed to your soul. But let the time past suffice ; 
 the Lord who has borne long with you, calls 
 upon you noiio to arise and shake yourself from 
 the dust ; he has been wounded in the house of 
 his friend ; but is now ready to pardon alL O 
 let him not call and intreat in vain, least he 
 should at last be provoked to say, ** My spu 
 rit shall no longer stme ivitb him,,, *My dear 
 friend, it is time that you set out again... You 
 know not how short your date may be... Then 
 give this little shred to the Lord, who has 
 given all to you, and trust him with all your 
 affairs, ^vho alone knows what is best for 
 you ; and trust that promise made to those 
 who first seek the kingdom of Heaven ancl 
 its Righteousness, that ''all other things 
 sliall be added to them.-' Then take him 
 at his word, cast all vour care unon him, 
 
( isr ; 
 
 give yourself up simply into his hands ; 
 and be determined to seek his favour, which 
 alone can make you happy in life and in 
 in death, be not displeased at my freedom... 
 for I dare not use reserve in spiritual matters ; 
 if I write at all I must not wound my con- 
 science, but write what is in my heart ; and 
 the most welcome return I can receive, is 
 the same plain dealing from my friend;...! 
 know I have need of it, and such has always 
 proved a blessing to my soul.... I thank my 
 God, I do find him gracious, he is indeed 
 the ^'■desire of my soul, and the joy of my 
 heart, ''^ and I do feel his love better than life, 
 and it is by his grace my determined reso- 
 lution to follow him whithersoever he shall 
 lead me, and am content to be despised 
 derided and counted a fool for his blessed 
 names sake, who has made me wise to sal- 
 vation;...! met with Lieutenant Gibbons in 
 Waterford, a ^qw days since, and trust we 
 have been a blessing to each other ; he has 
 recovered his strength, and is now veiy hap- 
 py in his soul,... my Affectionate love to Sis- 
 ter Jones ; stir each other up, the day Is far 
 spent, the night is at hand, and little work 
 
( 168 ) 
 
 done for Eternity ! May the Lord bless you 
 both, and save you from resting in* a nega- 
 the holiness, and make you partakers of all 
 his great and precious promises, is the ear- 
 nest prayer of Your real friend, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER LXXVill. 
 
 Mrs.Eliza Bennis...to Mr. R. T. 
 
 Limerick^ December 22, 1771. 
 
 DEAR SilR, 
 
 I HAVE just received your unexpec- 
 ted favour, and am much obliged by the fa- 
 vourable opinion you seem to entertain of 
 me, and the confidence you would repose in 
 me,by so open and free an acknowledgment 
 of your faults ; the later is certainly a cir- 
 cumstance in your favour, for the promise 
 of mercy is to him who confessetb and/orsak- 
 eth his sins.. ..But as you have opened your, 
 mind so fi-eely, will you be offended at my ^ 
 plainness of speech? I hope not; may the 
 Lord shew you all your heart.... I think. 
 Pride was your first ruin ; a certain uplif ed- 
 ness of heart, and confidence in ycur own, 
 Vv'isdom and abilities, which gave you some 
 consequence in your own esteem.. .(1 observ- 
 
( 169 ; 
 
 ved something of this when I was the second 
 time in Waterford, but had not courage to 
 warn you.) This seems to escape your no- 
 tice at present, but on a strict scrutiny into 
 your heart, I think the Lord will discover 
 it to you.... When I was last there, my soul 
 was grieved at your fall, and at the reproach 
 which it brought on the little flock ; and made 
 me often ashamed to shew my face in com- 
 pany. This hindered me from speaking to you 
 though my heart ached for you ; nor did I 
 forget you in my weak petitions to the throne 
 .of grace. When brother C. told me of your 
 convictions, I think I felt some small degree 
 of what the blessed above feel, at the return of 
 a sinner ; but this was damped by many fears, 
 which still hindered me from speaking to you ; 
 I feared what you were most grieved at, was 
 the loss of your reputation, and that your 
 repentance was not so much for your sin 
 against God, as for your loss of esteem 
 amongst men. (I hope you will not im- 
 pute this to a censorious spirit, the Lord 
 knows it is not, I am rather apt to err on 
 the other side ; but would have persons all of 
 
 P 
 
( 1^0 ) 
 
 a piece ; I would have believers bring forth 
 the fruits of faith ;... and I would have peni- 
 tents bring forth fruits meet for repentance,) 
 I enquired closely concerning you, and found 
 you were then engaged in a matrimonial aifair ; 
 I thought if your heat was broken for sin, 
 you would have but little appetite for court- 
 ing. Again I understood your chief compa- 
 nions were those who had themselves depart- 
 ed from God, and were then bitter enemies 
 to his people; such could not possibly be 
 helpful to your soul, while their own hearts were 
 full of rancour and bitterness. I hope such 
 are not now your associates ? If your repen- 
 tance be sincere you will seek for other com- 
 pany, who will be able to help you up again : 
 do not think I write thus plain to reproach 
 you, my heart is witness I do not w^ant to 
 grieve you ; I feel some part of your burden, 
 and am at times enabled to lay it be- 
 fore the Lord ; but I would have you search 
 your heart to the bottom, and tear it open 
 before him ; mark the rock on which your 
 Bark has already split, and lop off every thing 
 in your affections or practice, which might 
 be a hindrance to your restoration, the Lord 
 
( 171 ) 
 
 tjiir God is a jealous God, and will not 
 Bear a competitor, he must be served in spir- 
 it and in truth. You see Vvhat you have lost 
 fey looking two ways ; your business now is 
 straight forw^ard ; may the Lord direct your 
 steps, and give that earnestness of soul which 
 ^I'ill take no denial, you will get no good by 
 lying still, bemoaning yourself, ; your rem- 
 edy is in view ; the Brazen serpent is lifted 
 up, look to him No%v^ Now, Now believe 
 and you shall be made whole this moment ; 
 the Lord is w^illing to give power, only ask 
 in faith, I am Your sincere friend 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER LXXIX. 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis...to Mr, R. T. 
 
 Lifnerick, y miliary 29, 1772. 
 
 BEAR SIR, 
 
 THOUGH I know not how to use re- 
 serve in spiritual matters ; yet I could never 
 approve of that wildness which would take 
 as given by the Spirit of God, every impres- 
 sion that may be made on the mind ; this i 
 think would lead into great extravagance ; it 
 is certain the event often proves that our fears 
 
( t72 ) 
 
 were just; but who can tell this until it hap- 
 pens ? or who would venture to act from a 
 slight impression, as though there was a cer- 
 tainty... Indeed my liableness to mistake, 
 and the sense of my inability to judge or speak ^ 
 makes me at times very backward. ..At other 
 times I think 1 am more forward than be- 
 comes me, and am ready to hide my face 
 with shame, and resolve never to do so again.. 
 But the past is over; see that you now 
 profit by your loss; the Lord is willing to 
 pardon ail that is past; to meet the prod-~ 
 igal half way, and ^velcome him with a kiss . 
 of peace, not upbraiding for past disobedi- 
 ence, but rejoicing that his Son which was^ 
 lost is again found.... O let the sense of such 
 love break your heart, and resolve by his 
 grace to cleave to him while you live.. .But 
 where do 1 stray ! surely I can say nothing to. 
 you (who was a teacher in Isreal) but wliat you 
 know already, and what you have often said^ 
 to others... My heait's desire for you is, to see^ 
 you again happy in the love of God ; and is • 
 not this also our Lords desire ? then wha^^ 
 should hinder, if my friend be willing... il^t^-^t 
 ihis moment the Lord is as willing to pai'don .. 
 
i .73 ) 
 
 as ever he will be. ...May his power make' 
 way to your heart... is the fervent prayer of 
 your Sincere Friend, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER LXXX. 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis... to Mr. R. T. 
 
 Limerick^ November 22^ 1772. 
 
 I MUST tell my dear friend that I am 
 r.ot satisfied concerning you... I am jealous 
 over you, and fearful that you do not act 
 sincerely with God.... You know how prone 
 your heart is to wander from God... How 
 ready your natural disposition to lead you 
 astray, and how prevalent your beseting evil. 
 Do you watch against these ? do you guard 
 the avenues of your heart ? do you deny your- 
 self that which your heart most desires ? 
 that which the spirit of God has at times 
 given you to see is most dangerous to 
 you ? and that by which the Devil liad almost 
 got you into his snare ? I ir.ean trifling un- 
 profitable company...! know, notwithstand- 
 ing the hurry of business, you have intervals 
 of leisure, do you buy up these opporniiM-I- ; ? 
 do you sequester yourself to poui 
 
 s6Ul in secret before the Lord,' and a 
 P 2 
 
( 174 ) 
 
 thankful for such precious opportunities ? does 
 your soul hunger after them ? and do you 
 prize them as a treasure ? do you seek the 
 company of those who are precious in the 
 sight of God ? is it with these you spend the 
 moments you hav for conversation ; and is 
 the company of others empty and tiresome to 
 you ? O bear with me ; I fear this is not the 
 case... I fear you neglect prayer, (I do not 
 mean totally) I fear you spend your leisure 
 hours, for the most part, in company that 
 will at last lead you to destruction 1 1 fear you 
 are not watchful over your own heart, and 
 that you do not attend to the admonitions of 
 God's spirit... You seem to know and feel 
 your malady, blessed be God for this ! it is a 
 gracious indication of his willingness to save ; 
 his mercy is held out to you, he calls and in- 
 vites you to accept it, and will not remember 
 against you, your former backslidings...But 
 surely though his mercy is free, yet it miist 
 be sought, in the way of his own appointing : 
 If we would attain the end, we must use the 
 means \ though w^e cannot by any preparation 
 render ourselves worthy of the grace of God ! 
 y^t there is a preparation which he requires \ 
 
( 1^5 ) 
 
 and without which he never will accept us ; 
 All the promises of the Gospel are conditional. 
 They that as^i shall receive... That seek shall 
 find. ..That kncek shall have the door of mercy 
 opened to them, And our Lord exhorts to 
 '-'•cut off the right hand''' to ^^ pluck out the 
 right eye'''' to remove e'^sery obstruction, how- 
 ever dear or profitable to us ; that we may be 
 the better prepai'cd to receive his grace ; In- 
 deed I think our desiring the grace of God 
 implies so much... If our repentance be sin- 
 cere we will bring forth fruit meet for it... If 
 we sincerely desire to be brought into the 
 favour of God, this desire will lead us to deny 
 ourselves of every thing that is displeasing to 
 
 ^ him ; surely if we would take the kingdom of 
 Heaven it must be by the violence of prayer, 
 and self-denial; for the promise is sure, that 
 at what time soever we seek the Lord with 
 our whole hearty we shall find him... Suffer va^ 
 
 ^^^p speak thus fi-eely ; God ivilhiot be trifled 
 with, what a man soweth, that he shall cer- 
 tainly reap... Examine your heart, and suffer 
 the spirit of God to reprove you, your soul is 
 at stake, and what will all your little foolisU 
 gratifications profit in that hour when you 
 
( 176 ) 
 
 .shall be called to give an account of the deeds 
 done in the body... May I ask, what profit or 
 satisfaction have you nmv of all that is past ? 
 is not the remembrance of them grievous t 
 do they not produce very painful reflections, ? 
 and so it will be, while you seek happiness 
 in the creature. 
 
 v?od only can make an immortal soul hap- 
 py, this you are a witness of; and your own 
 conscience must testify against you, that you 
 never found happiness but in God..*. Come 
 back then my Brother to the same fountain 
 which stands still open ; his blood is still suf- 
 ficient, and his merit still prevalent ; neither 
 will he upbraid for all that is past...O do not 
 be content to remain in your present state ; 
 press hard after God, cry mightily to him, 
 and resolve that nothing shall hinder your re- 
 turn : you are not in the morning of life, ..You 
 know not hov/ soon your soul may be requi- 
 red of you, and will you sell your birthright 
 for a mess of pottage ? God forbid, put forth 
 all your strength, and the Lord will help you.. * 
 Be serious, be much in prayer, and O fiy tri- 
 fling foolish company... If you would save, 
 your soul you must be content to be the scoff 
 
( 15^?^ ) 
 
 of fools.. May the Lord speak with power to 
 your heart... Is the earnest prayer, of Your 
 Sincere Friend, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS* 
 
 LETTER LXXXL 
 Mrs. KUza B€nni8...io Mr. R. T. 
 
 Limcrkk November 9, 177 Zo 
 
 DEAK SIR, 
 
 IT cerrtainly is an indication of an hon- 
 est heart, to bear plain dealing ; but will this 
 do, while you still continue in sin ? you say 
 my letter " produced half a resolution to 
 *^ amend," would to God it was a whole one. 
 such if earnestly pursued might have produced 
 some good eftects. But how long, are you to 
 go on at this rate ? half resolving, and by your 
 delay making sure your eternal damnation. 
 You acknowlege your fault, plead guilty, and 
 still go on ! as though you bid God defiance. 
 Remember '' that servant who knows his mas- 
 ter's will and does it not, shall be beaten with 
 many stripes'*'* ; I have already laid all this 
 before you, nor can I noiM say any thing new, 
 what course shall I then take ? shall I give 
 you up ! seeing you will not be reclaimed, in- 
 deed T am often tempted to this, but at such 
 
times tlnnk I will try one letter more ; nor 
 would I now desist, if I could see any hope of 
 amendment ; if intreaties could prevail, I 
 would beseech you to have mercy on your own 
 soul... TT;*^/ which Christ has purchased with 
 his blood; That which must live for ever, and 
 which is capable of such celestial enjoyment ; 
 O let it not fall a victim to the brutal gratifi- 
 cation of a filthy carcase ; O for God's sake 
 consider this, and consider what Christ has 
 done and suffered for you ; I would beseech 
 you for his sake to turn, repent, and live.... 
 what could he have done more for you than 
 he has done I he suffered a long and painful 
 life, and died a grievous and ignominious 
 death! and still interceeds, and pleads his 
 merit and death, in your behalf. And will 
 you still continue to grieve his spirit ? to pain 
 his loving heart ! to send him away mourning 
 and complaining that *' you will not come to 
 him, that you may have life'' ; if his tears 
 and entreaties w^ill not prevail ; should I urge 
 the cause of God scandalized throtigh yout* 
 means, will not all this force vou to relent? 
 Should not the, people of God whose^ouls 
 vou have e:rieved, cause you to mourn vo!i: 
 
( ir9 ) 
 
 revolt. They love you, they are pained 
 for you, they pray and weep for you, and still 
 you suffer them to bear your reproach, and 
 blush for you in vain ; whilst the enemies' of 
 God point the finger, and shake the head, and 
 cry, " so would we have it". These are, I 
 think, weighty considerations, and should 
 have some place in a heart not entirely lost 
 to all the feelings of generosity and friend- 
 ship. Shall I extend it any farther ? Shall I 
 as an individual lay claim to a share of that 
 friendship which you have so often professed 
 for me^ if this be real, why will you grieve 
 :e ; vv^hy pain TTry heart by refusing your own 
 mercies ; why cannot my tears, prayers and 
 entreaties have any influence, or at all per- 
 suade you to turn to God and live. And why 
 has not the weighty consideration of a youth 
 in the dawn of life, just now susceptible of ei- 
 ther good or ill impressions, committed to 
 your car^,* swayed by your example, and 
 guided by your advice ; some weight with 
 you^ ; if by you he is led to slight the means of 
 grace, or by looking at your life and conver- 
 sation is led to think lightly of God and his 
 ways ; and from a contempt of your profes- 
 
 * Her oldest son, then Apprentice to Mr. T. 
 
( 180 } 
 
 s:on gives way to carelessness and sin, are 
 you not answerable for his soul ; and though 
 he should perish in his sins, will not his soul 
 be required at your hands, and will not his 
 destruction enhance your own damnation. 
 
 O will not all the admonitions and friend- 
 ly warnings you have- got appear as swift 
 witnesses against you ! And those who you 
 now cherish as dearest friends, to whom you 
 have given your heart and affections, and for 
 whose sake you are at times even willing to 
 be damned; will you not then in the 
 horror of irretrievable darkness and despair, 
 look upon, as your most inveterate enemies, | 
 and mutually curse the day that brought 
 ye first together, do you not stand on the 
 brink of the most slippery precipice ! O what 
 a miracle of mercy, that your own incautious 
 behaviour has not long since tumbled you in t 
 How long it may be the case God only knows ; 
 His mercy is indeed long suffering ; but ** he 
 that has been often reproved, and still harden- 
 eth his neck, shall be suddenly destroyed, and 
 that ivitbout remedy^\ 
 
 I have just received a letter from Mr. Chris- 
 tian, who informs me, that of late you are more 
 
( 181 ) 
 
 frequent at the public meetings ; I am glad to 
 hear this ; God grant it may continue, but 
 without a uniformity of behaviour in heart and 
 life, it will do no good ; a partial reformation 
 is only a new piece on an old garment. You 
 must be all of a piece, and watch eveiy mo- 
 tion of your heart, that it lead yon not astraj'. 
 If you are in earnest, you will be much in 
 prayer, and will find a more useful manner of 
 spending your leisure hours ; until this is the 
 case, I shall have but little hopes of you. 
 I am, your real friend, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS, 
 
 LETTER LXXXIL 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis,....to Mr. Jonathan Hern^ 
 Litnericky March 27, 1773, 
 SOME time since, I received a letter from 
 my Dear Brother Hern, which some little jea- 
 lousies prevented my answering. But as I 
 hope the cause of all these is now^ removed 
 from your heart, so is the very remembrance 
 of them from mine. Sister M. has made my 
 heart glad on your account, but would think 
 it a particular favour, your acquainting me in 
 what mamier you were convinced of your in- 
 
 Q 
 
( t82 ) 
 
 dwelling sin, and how delivered from it... - 
 Blessed be God who has made you a witness 
 of that truth which you have so often, and so 
 vehemently contradicted, and fought against. 
 Surely you are now called to testify against all 
 the works of the Devil, and to hunt him out 
 of every strong hold... May the Lord make 
 you faithful in this ; if you are, your own soul 
 shall prosper... But if to please men, you keep 
 back any part of the childrens portion, be as- 
 sured the Lord will deal by you, as you do by 
 his little ones. I am my dear Brother Hern's 
 Sincere friend. 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER LXXXIIL 
 
 Mr. Jonathan Hern... to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 Cork, April IC-y, \77^. 
 I SHALL gladly comply with my Dear 
 Sister Bennis's request... God was first plea- 
 sed to make known his loving kindness to 
 me, by pardoning my sins in the year 1765, , 
 The year after, I was married ; and fell from 
 grace, lost the life of God, and continued, 
 careless and In a state of sin for four months... 
 The Lord in pity visited me again, healed my 
 
C 185 ) 
 
 backslidings, and gave me a sense of his fa- 
 vour.. .From the year 1764 to the year 1773. 
 I have often backslided in heart from God. 
 I often felt pride, passion, self-will, and eveiy 
 evil within ; and was content ; nay seemed in 
 league with these enemies of my peace ; and 
 concluded that they m.ust necessarily remain 
 so long as I carried a body. I was an enemy 
 in my heart, to the doctrine of holiness ; where 
 ever, or by whomsoever I heard it preached, 
 my old man rose up against it ; Nay though 
 a travelling preacher I watched over those for 
 evil who professed it ! Thus you see how I 
 fought against one of the most fundamental 
 doctrines of the Gospel of Jesus Christ, and 
 like Saul of Tarsus thought I was doing God. 
 service. 
 
 Last nev/ years day, I found an earnest 
 desire to live more closely to God ; insomuch 
 that I entered into covenant with hini; in my 
 chamber to that purpose. The next day he 
 laid lus afflicting hand upon me, my body was 
 racked with pain. Under this afRiction the 
 Lord gave me such a sight of my heart as 1 
 never had before; so that I was constrained tc» 
 cry aloud ; but still unbelief prevailed and 
 
( 184 ) 
 
 urged " these things cannot be done aw ay, £tt 
 least until a little before death'*, however I 
 continued to have such a sight of my inbred 
 corruptions from the second to the ninth of 
 January, as I never had before. (I cried Lord 
 this is Hell) on the ninth of January a book 
 was put into my luuids written by J^Ir. Gilbert 
 on •' Chri^:tian Perfection" ; I was convinced 
 by the arguments there made use of, that it 
 v.as attainable by simple faith, and ivat now 
 (I now saw my cv;n wisdom, kept me at a dis- 
 tance) Seeing it to be my privilege, and be- 
 ing weary of the hell in m.y own breast, I 
 cried mightily to the Lcrcl, and on Friday the 
 twenty second of January, that 77ietnorabic iiv^y 
 God wiiile I Avas at prayer removed the Hell 
 in my breast, and I ws filled with lo^'e, with 
 Heaven, and with God ! on the Monday fol- 
 lowing while meeting the select band, the 
 Lord so shined into my heart, and gave me 
 such a strong testimony of his Spirit ; as re- 
 moved every doubt that he had cleansed it 
 from all sin ; so that Jiow I know experiment- 
 ally, that his blood cleanseth from all sin. I 
 now walk with God, and converse with him, 
 as a man with his friend. He is pleased to 
 
( iS5 ) 
 
 open my understanding in his word ; and bles- 
 sed be his name I am not afraid or ashamed 
 to preach Jesus Christ as a Saviour to the 
 uttermost, as one that is able and willing nouo 
 to save his people from all their inbred sins ; 
 and from all Earthly, Sensual and Devilish 
 tempers, into all the mind which was in~ 
 Christ. Thus you see what the Lord Jesus 
 has done in a short time ; for such an unwor- 
 thy wretch. O praise him with me. *' Eter- 
 nity's too short to sing his praise. I love my 
 dear Sister Bennis 7iow better than ever... 
 Those are particularly dear to me who love 
 God with (3r// their heart. ■ I often think of 
 you and the select band in Limerick, and can- 
 not forget to pray for ye, my love to them 
 all, read this letter for them, nay publish it 
 upon the house top. God since he has bles- 
 sed me has made mine enemies to be at peace 
 with me. May the Gracious Lord bless you 
 and may your soul prosper as Carmcl, Sha- 
 ron and Lebanon, prays your truly 
 
 Affectionate Friend and Brother 
 JONATHAN HERN 
 Q2 
 
• i86 ; 
 
 LETTER LXXXlV. 
 Mr. John Bristol... to Mrs. Eliza Bennis, 
 
 Balhj Moore, October 18, 1775. 
 My Dear Friend 
 
 Though I simpathize in your trials, yet 
 you have not one too many, for God does all 
 things ix)ell, and you may greatly comfort 
 yourself by firmly believing that all things 
 ^ball work together for good to them that 
 love God ; can you say you are not one of 
 these ? No, you cannot, you dare not say so ; 
 then take the comfort to yourself. You may 
 be certain that deep waters are not more 
 needful to carry the rich laden vessel to her 
 appointed haven, than those deep conflicting 
 sorrows are to bear your precious immortal 
 soul over the tempestuous ocean of this dan- 
 gerous world, to that blessed and peaceful 
 shore where the wicked cease from troubling 
 and the weary enjoy everlasting rest. Dark- 
 ness I do not plead for, God forbid ! but 
 through great tribulation w^ must enter the 
 kingdom of God. No trial I know for the 
 present is joyous, but they tend to create in us 
 an indifference to sublunary things. High 
 winds and loud thunders are tenifying, yet 
 
. 18/ ) 
 
 ihey have their intended use, they purge and 
 cleanse the air, the application is easy, and I 
 may add that winters nipping frost, carries as 
 useful a property in it, as May-day's morning 
 sun, though not so agreeable to u. We 
 have often experienced what is most displea- 
 sing is not always most hurtful. No, for, 
 ** Crosses from his sovereign hand, are bles- 
 sings in disguise". The great Apostle, be- 
 sought the Lord thrice^ to remove the thorn, 
 but his answer was '' My grace is sufficient" 
 what can you desire more ? Jesus is never so 
 precious as when trouble is near ; then in 
 bim, we experimentally prove dwells all the 
 fulness of the God-head bodily ; and out of 
 his fulness we receive grace to help in every 
 time of need. I trust you will soon have 
 abundant cause to say with boldness, *' God 
 is my refuge and strength, and a very present 
 help in every time of trouble". I am confi- 
 dent he will give you patience under all your 
 sufferings, and an happy deliverance out of 
 every trial. I had much rather labour under 
 your present state of mind for a season, disa- 
 greeable as it may be ; than be in the state of 
 them who glide indifferently through religion 
 
( 188 ) 
 
 atid the world, without finding either pleasure 
 or pain in the former. Too many of this sort 
 have 1 met with. 
 
 I never saw more need to make a stand 
 against the rapid progress of formality than 
 at present, for it breaks in upon the Church 
 of God hke a great inundation, and has alrea- 
 dy deluged '4 great part of the believing 
 world ; happy are they who maintain the real 
 power of Godliness, though they follow the 
 redeemer through tribulations darkest night. 
 I trust and believe this is your case, and 
 would be glad to hear you enjoy more sen- 
 sible satisfaction in the good ways of our bles- 
 sed Master. Reflect on his past goodness ; 
 follow him to the garden, behold him on Cav-. 
 vtry mangled and torn ! Contem.plate on fu- 
 turity, and consider, "^// that height of gloria 
 ous bliss, our everlasting portion is; '' and then 
 I think you will joyfully ^'praise him for all 
 that is past, and trust him for what is to 
 come, "...and be enabled to welcome toil or 
 grief or pain, saying **all is well for Christ 
 is mine,'* farewell my Dear Sister, may the 
 
( 189 ) 
 
 Lord be your support... prays your truly Af^ 
 f''*:^tioiiate Brother, 
 
 JOHN BRISTOL. 
 
 LETTER LXXXV. 
 
 Ykr. John Goodwin.. .to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 nristoly March'15, 1778. 
 
 MY VERY loEAK SISTER. 
 
 THOUGH exceedingly hurried in this 
 large city, yet I cannot suffer our Dear father 
 and friend (Mr. Wesley) to pay you a visit, 
 without sending by him a short pledge of my 
 continued affection ; wherever this veteran 
 Apostle goes he carries and leaves a blessing; 
 may his visit to Ireland and particularly t 
 Dear Limerick be as profitable, as it has been 
 at this time to Bristol. Our bands both pub- 
 lic and select had got into a covered way of 
 speaking ; instead of openly and explicitly de> 
 clareing what God had done for their souls, 
 in cleansing them from all sin and enabling 
 them to love the Lord their God with all 
 their heart, they would only say that *' God 
 had given them a great blessing,'' or such 
 like general expression, which was in fact 
 saying nothing to the point, and often stopped 
 
( 190 ) 
 
 timed preachers from sinking deeper into 
 their experience. This ambiguous manner of 
 sj^eaking (which I fear has not been confmed 
 to Bristol only) springs either from World- 
 ly prudence, or voluntary humility ; both of 
 which are hurtful to the people of God. 
 But Mr. Wesley's reproof advice and encour- 
 agement, has had the good eficct of remov. 
 ing this improper shyness, and many have 
 declared in plain words, that *' God hath clean- 
 sed them from all unrighteousness, and filled 
 them with perfect love,'' some that I know 
 nothing of in that respect 'till now, and by 
 this means, the work of God seems to have.^ 
 got a fresh spur in this city. 
 
 As for my o^vn btate, I wish every one that 
 has found a clean heart, would beware of the 
 reasonings of good men, and also of their own 
 heart on this point ; devices from which I 
 have greatly suffered. May God restore to 
 me that simplicity which once I did enjoy ; 
 I clearly see nothing else will make me hap- 
 py. I am more than ever convinced that it is 
 the most sim.ple thing in the world, to give 
 the whole heart unto God ; and hence it is, 
 that it i^ so hard a thing! Pride utterly oppc 
 
( 191 ) 
 
 ses this simplicity, pride will permit us to' 
 reason but not to believe, O that I Avas as a 
 little child before the Lord ! let my Dear 
 i^ riend's petitions be addedto mine for this,... 
 Your Sincerely Affectionate 
 
 JOHN GOODWIN. 
 
 LETTER LXXXVT. 
 
 Mr. Samuel Bradburn...to Mrs. Eliza Bennis 
 Diihlin^ June 14, \777^ 
 
 MY DEAR MRS. BENNIS. 
 
 I HOPE your soul rejoices in the pos- 
 session of the mind thatwas in Christ ! what that 
 mind was is plain from Mathew 11 & 29 
 and Philip 2 & 5. This humble mind implies 
 every other blessing ; Loi)€^ the very soul of all 
 religion, can never be obtained or kept with- 
 out this. Faitb^ that is armour upon armour, 
 cannot possibly subsist without this blessed 
 grace. Hope^ that anchor of the soul, would 
 be lost in hypocrisy, or banished by despair 
 but for this disposition of the heart, in short 
 Patience^ Resignatioriy Contentment^ Peace^ 
 Joy, ^c, would all be empty names without the 
 mind of Qhv'i^t,,, Genuine Humility (that is) 
 1^ "proper estimation of all things" or in other 
 
( 192 ) 
 
 words to * 'Think right," hence the Apostie 
 ' In patience possess your souls, '^ or (as we 
 may render it) Thoughts, of God, Angels. 
 Saints, Devils, the World, Religion, the 
 Scriptures, Heaven, Hell, Ou r selves &:c.&:c. 
 I was going to proceed, but really mentioning 
 such a rich variety of subjects has quite 
 swallowed up my soul in shame and astonish^ 
 ment, under a sense of my own Ignorance I 
 Surely **I am more brutish than any man^ 
 and have not the understanding of a man" yet 
 blessed be my God, I know he is good, I feel 
 my heart w^arm with his divine love, while 
 I write about his amazing, incomprehensible 
 glorious Majesty ! I think I begin to hvae 
 wisdom enough to know I am a fool. Glory 
 to God I am not lost in folly, beyond recpv^ 
 ery ! Sometimes I am tempted to think I 
 know more than those about me, but alltliis 
 vanisheth away, when I consider things ac- ' 
 cording to their proper nature. I think upor 
 the whole, I find more faith, love, resigna- 
 tion, patience and peace of mind every day, i 
 because I find more of the blessed mind of 
 Christ. O that I may ever be kept at the 
 
v 1^^3 ) 
 
 foot of the cross; and always standing in aw^, 
 that I sin not ! I plainly see the worth of re- 
 ligion is not known to most of its professors, 
 or they would quickly renounce not only all 
 the errors in judgment about a God of love, 
 but they would renounce the world more, and 
 love to be more alone. O Sweet retirement! 
 there is no possibility of prospering without 
 being often in private with our Heavenly Fa- 
 ther, and as much as in us lies in sweet com- 
 munion with his real Children....! am Dear 
 Mrs. Bennis, Your Affectionate, 
 
 SAMUEL BRADBURN. 
 
 P. S. Without shewing this to any one 
 whatsoever ; I particularly request your honest 
 deliberate thoughts on the following queries. 
 
 First. Is it possible for God to be Ornnh' 
 cient, absolutely to know all things in time and 
 eternity, past, present, and future ; for the 
 doctrine of absolute reprobation ( or Cahinism) 
 not to be true, and for the torments of Hell to 
 be Eternal ? 
 
 Second. If it is impossible for all these to. 
 be true together, which is the least danger- 
 ous to deny ? 
 
 R 
 
( i94 , 
 
 Third. Would denying one of diem, in 
 any measure invalidate die Scriptures, make 
 the God of love less loving, and the comforts 
 of religion fewer in number, or smaller in na- 
 ture ; which is it ? 
 
 I would go on, but I spare you, it will not 
 do to say *' you should not be thinking oi" 
 these things," It is no new subject, nor do 
 I ask for asking sake.... Think closely upor 
 each of these, and send me soon the result 
 of your thoughts. 
 
 LETTER LXXXVII. 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis...to Mr. Samuel Bradburn. 
 Limerick^ June 22, 1777. 
 MY Dear Brother Bradburn must cer- 
 tainly be sensible how unequal I am to the 
 task he imposes, yet nothing will do but the 
 exposing my ignorance to a friend from 
 whom I desire not to hide it. 
 
 The questions you propose are such as I 
 think have never yet been fully answered. 
 My own mind has been often puzzled about 
 these very points, and I have always found it the 
 safest way to withdraw my mind from these 
 sort of speculations ; finding them too deep for 
 
 '-♦•.»■ 
 .>** 
 
me, indeed I think they are too deep for the 
 wisest man that ever lived. Secret things 
 belong to God, let us be content with what 
 lie has revealed, and not exalt our little nar- 
 row measure of understanding even to infini- 
 ty, here we only discover our pride and ig- 
 norance, when to bring down tlie v^-ays of 
 ^'Gotl ' to our little comprehension, we form in 
 t)ur minds a certain system of laws, which we 
 1 ink together according to our own concep- 
 tions, and then proclaim these with as much 
 confidence as if we had received them ensj^ra- 
 ven on tables of stone by the finger of God ! 
 allowing that all the v/orld may err, but U'^ 
 are infallibly right ; what sad work has this 
 sort of conceited infallibility made in the 
 i?r world, and how much of it has been blended 
 >fiin all controvercies, and it is to be lamented 
 •'that too much of this ; subsists even amongst 
 .the dear children of God. j\:ay the Lord 
 deliver my friend and me from it. 
 
 On giving your letter another reading, I 
 
 . find you are determined not to take what I 
 
 have already said for :rn answer, but! must 
 
 send you my honest deliberate thoughts on 
 
 your Queries. 
 
196 
 
 P'irst. (then,) In all my conceptions of God, 
 his ways and works, I have concluded that 
 I am very ignorant, that his ways are very 
 mysterious, and that the depths of his eternal 
 mind Is not known even to the Angels that 
 attend his throne ; beyond these limits I never 
 suffer my \houghts to wander. I certainly 
 believe God perfect in every attribute, there- 
 fore he must be omniscient, must know all 
 thirigs past, present and future ; yet we must 
 net by this destroy his mercy; He has fixed 
 certain laws whereby lie go^'erns the world, 
 and the greatest reprobate mustackiiov/iege 
 them Holy, Just, and Good ; then if so, they 
 must be unalterable, else his Justice would not 
 be perfect, for if his laws were dispensed 
 with from a respect of persons, it would be 
 Caprice not Justice, I also think he has made 
 his terms so easy that all may be saved ; I be- 
 lieve he has given a sufficient measure of grace 
 to every soul, that by improving it, they may 
 be saved ; that they are not is entirely their 
 own fault ; though he certainly se^s they will 
 not, yet this foreknowlege of his can- 
 not be imputed as the cause, no more than 
 the foreknowlege of the prophets can be the 
 
cause oi' the evils which ihey foresaw. I 
 certainly think he wills that all should be sa- 
 ved, and when all by one transgression was 
 ruined, he of his abundant mercy provided a 
 most expensive ransom ! what more could he 
 have done ? And farther, to clear his justice 
 he has provided every help to draw, to allure, 
 to invite us to accept the offers of his grace. 
 But some may say ** he knew all would not 
 accept his offered grace, and as he knew it, 
 why did he not use some more forcible me- 
 thods with them" ? I ihink this would be un- 
 just ; he holds out to them the same offers, 
 the same warnings, the same invitations, and 
 equally wills their salvation ; but as our Lord 
 complains, '^ They will not come unto him 
 that they may have life". From all these con- 
 siderations, I believe the doctrine of reproba- 
 tion unscriptural, false and very pernicious. 
 Yet there are many particular circumstances 
 in God's manner of working, \^ hich indeed 
 I cannot fathom, and which looks like predes- 
 tination, these are often very mysterious to 
 mc; and I think should be let alone by the wi- 
 sest until finite can be able to grasp infinity. 
 And among these, are the eternity of the tor- 
 R 2 
 
( 19S ) 
 
 ments of Hell, and many other matters which I 
 never expect to know in this life, and perhaps 
 some of them I shall not know to all eternity. 
 You ask, *Mvhich is less dangerous to be- 
 lieve ?" I think it is less dangerous to believe 
 him a God of universal love and benevolence, 
 as he has declared himself in his word ; who 
 desires not the death of a sinner, but is wil- 
 ling that ^//should repent and live.... These 
 are my ^Mionest deliberate thoughts" but 
 should I suffer my mind to run into nice rea- 
 soning on these matters, I would expect to b^ 
 entivngled in labyrinths of my own making ; 
 for I have ever observed in the ways and 
 works of God, something as incomprehensi- 
 ble to me, as the Deity himself ; and indeed 
 if it was not so, he would not be God ! for, 
 what sort of a God must he be that could be 
 comprehended by such little beings, such 
 groveling insects, who cannot comprehend 
 the smallest insect around us. 
 
 I hope my Dear Friend's mind is not puz- 
 zled about these matters ; this would trouble 
 me very much,though I should be apt to think 
 it was but justice for your severity towards 
 ^ose who hold these opinions, which I often 
 
( i99 ) 
 
 thought you carried too far ; I am certain 
 there are many souls in glory, who whilst 
 here held these opinions j and I really believe 
 there are many now on earth who hold them 
 and are beloved of God ; then if he bears not 
 only patiently, but lovingly with them, why 
 should not we ; perhaps their opinions are 
 less hurtftil than our zeal against them. May 
 his unerring Spirit set us all right, prays 
 vour truly Affectionate friend 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER LXXXVIII. 
 
 Mr. John Stretton...to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 jVewfoimd-land, Carbonear^ October 29, 1 770. 
 Dear Madam, 
 
 A GRATEFUL sense of your kindness 
 to me in Waterford, and a thankful remem- 
 brance of the Christian Admonitions you then 
 pressed on me, I trust shall never be eradica- 
 ted from my heart ; emboldened by these, I 
 take the liberty of acquainting you, with my 
 safe landing here, my present situation and 
 Drosnects ^scc.'^^'^"^"^'^"'^^^'^^^^'^^'''^^^^''^''^^^ 
 
 Religion is scarce to be found in this coun« 
 try, a few professors scattered through the 
 different Bays, that were awakened by the 
 
( 200 ) 
 
 labours of ISlr..Congblan, who keeps up meet- 
 ings among them in the winter season, for 
 that is the only time they have to spare. 
 
 As to myself, I see more and more of the 
 wickedness of my own heart, and it is now my 
 constant cry to have the polluted fountain 
 cleansed ; let me entreat you to remember 
 me at the throne of grace, for I fear evil 
 getting the ascendancy over my best resolu- 
 tions. It has pleased God to shake me over 
 the very brink of the grave several times, 
 since I left Ireland ; and then I could see how 
 unfit I was to appear before his dread tribu- 
 nal. Once I narrowly escaped death by a fall 
 from a loft, several times I w^as near perish- 
 ing in the great deep, having been tossed 
 about in an open boat for some hours in 
 a heavy gale of wind, when my hope 
 failed me and I could only cry for mercy. 
 Oft have I been delivered, and yet I am mi- 
 thankful ! However my resolution is fixed 
 to turn and seek him who can speak peace 
 to my soul, and though I often find Sin steal- 
 ing on me unawares, yet hope I shall be de- 
 livered from it, by that Almighty arm which 
 restrained me from diinking down iniquity 
 like wat^r. 
 
( 201 ) 
 
 Requesting a letter from you next spring, 
 and wishing you every happiness in time 
 and eternity, I am Dear Madam, Yours 
 most Respectfully 
 
 ' JOHN STRETTON. 
 
 LETTER LXXXIX. 
 
 Mr. John Str€tton...to Mrs, Eliza Bennis, 
 Newfound-hnd^ Harbour Grace, November 12, l^fl. 
 
 Dear Madam, 
 
 I AM truly thankful for your welcome 
 letter, and shall keep it as a precious relic ; 
 your plainness I esteem, as a mark of your 
 regard 'for my soul ; but must observe you 
 have mistaken an expression in mine ; I can 
 assure you I never wrote it with design to 
 cover myself with the filthy rags of my own 
 righteousness: I know my wickedness too 
 well to impose such a covering upon myself, 
 and I have a natural something within, that 
 scorns to act the hypocrite, for I am sure I 
 never professed myself to be what I really 
 was not. I shall now act sincerely, and tell you 
 that I am a very wicked creature ; that I have 
 made resolutions both in Ireland and here, 
 and yet have broke them all; T would wiK 
 
( 202 ) 
 
 ijngly hope that I am not abandoned, thougli 
 I find it hard to tear that Delila, that darhnfi; 
 sin from me. I hate sin, and yet I fall into 
 it, is that consistent? I am a lump of incon- 
 sistence ! and sec that nothing less than an 
 Almighty Arm can save me from my sins. 
 May the blessed Jesus prove that he is Al- 
 mighty to save, and strong to deiivcr ; mra 
 he pluck me as a brand out of the burning. 
 
 If I am not too bad to merit one thought 
 of yours, let me request you sometimes to 
 think of the poor fugithe^ particularly when 
 you address the throne of grace ; and favour 
 me with a letter next Spring. 
 
 I am Dear Madam &c. 
 JOHN STRETTON. 
 
 LETTER XC. 
 
 Mr. John Stretton,..to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 Harbour Grace^ Noveinber 13, 1772. 
 Dear Madam, 
 
 I DO indeed sincerely thank you foi 
 your very kind letter of last spring, it has 
 proved a cordial to my drooping spirits. Last 
 winter I met constantly in the mens' ciass, 
 which Mr. Coughlan formed in this place, 
 
( 203 ) 
 
 4jnd I believe was earnest in my search after 
 happiness : oft have I been affected with true 
 contritiop., and was constant in my attendance 
 at the throne of Grace ; yet still, 1 was, I am, 
 but an *' almost chrisliaii:" You will ask 
 the cause ! It is surely in me; I am in a world 
 of huny, confusion and noise ; and it requires 
 more Grace than I have yet attained, to st^nd 
 even and steady upon these tumultuous 
 3 business encreased, my devotion 
 ■rg-jm to languish ; the restless busy world, 
 V ouid fain engross the whole heart. Even 
 !ini) I am uneasy; this foolish fluctuating 
 vorld^ takes up too much of my thoughts and 
 desires, and either flatters with delusive shades, 
 r affrights with gloomy apprehensions. At 
 lis very instant^ I feel the powerful influence 
 A melancholy ^ and can hardly collect my scat- 
 tered thoughts to VvTite. I hope God will 
 bi'ing good out of this evil, and turn my re- 
 flections to a proper point, O may it end in 
 my sound conversion. In whatever part of 
 die world, providence may see fit to cast my 
 lot, I shall ever bear a grateful remembrance 
 
( 204 ) 
 
 ol your friendship, and entreat a continuance 
 of your prayers for a poor wanderer. 
 
 I am Dear Madam &c. 
 
 JOHN STRETTON. 
 
 LETTER XCI. 
 Mr. John Stretton...to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 Harbour Grace, November 14, 1773. 
 Dear Madam, 
 
 A SENSE of my own insignificance, 
 makes me at a loss to answer your last very 
 kind and friendly letter; I ask myself, *' how 
 can this servant of Christ trouble herself with 
 such a worthless cumber ground ?" Again, I 
 reason thus with myself; ''Art thou not 
 ashamed to write the sincere sentiments of 
 thy heart ? Mrs. Bennis expects that thou 
 canst now witness a good confession, and art 
 now rejoicing in the love of God, and wilt 
 thou undeceive her ? if thou dost, she will 
 look upon thee as a profligate wretch unwor- 
 thy her regard"....! start at the supposition! I 
 would not be despised, though I deserve it. 
 At this instant my respect for you is so great, 
 and the contempt I feel for myself so predo- 
 minant, that I am apprehensive you will not 
 
( 205 ) 
 
 trouble yourself to write me another letter ; 
 the thought is painful, for I have found your 
 letters so useful, that I dread the loss of them: 
 however I hope, I shall now and at all times, 
 act consistent with truth and honest plainness, 
 let what will be the consequence....! have to 
 say of myself that I often feel the want of a 
 Saviour ; and am clearly convinced that 1 
 cannot be happy, until Jesus the Lord, saves 
 me from the guilt and the power of sin. I 
 am often ready to lay hold on the promise, 
 to take it as my own ; but I want a power 
 to l^elieve. Blessed Jesus, thou canst give 
 the power, thou only canst open the eyes of 
 I the blindy thou canst remove this Egyptian 
 i darkness, canst break this cursed barr of 
 unbelief and turn my Hell to Heaven. 
 
 My Dear friend do not cease to pray for 
 me, pray even 7io'w^ that I might receive my 
 sight. 
 
 I return you my sincere thanks for your 
 delicate manner in disclosing the death of 
 my Dear M other ; and for your wholesome 
 advice, and all your kind admonitions, may 
 the Lord bless you.,..T have now to inform 
 vou, that I have married a native of this land 
 S 
 
( 206 ; 
 
 since I wrote last^ she is blessed with many 
 aGComplishments, that would even grace an 
 European ; but the chief is, that she fears 
 God, and walks in his ways. 
 
 After all, I find that no creature or created 
 thing can make me happy : nor can I rest 
 short of an interest, in that B hod which cl^an- 
 seth from all sin.... I hope this will find you 
 in perfect peace, and all around you happy ; 
 may a long continuance of spiritual and tem- 
 poral blessings united, be your lot, is the 
 imaffected wish, of Dear Madam Your real 
 friend, 
 
 JOHN STRETTON. 
 
 LETTER XCII. 
 Mr. John Strctton. .'o IVirs. Eliza Bennis 
 
 Harborgrace^ November 4, 17 7 A. 
 Mydearmrs. bennis. 
 
 THIS moment I feel my heart glow 
 with affection to you ; I have just now read 
 your welcome letter, and do sincerely thank 
 you for it : your directions, with respect 
 to married people, is exactly consistent with 
 my sentiments, and I lK)pe God will en- 
 able me to follow them.... You obseiTe th^t 
 
( 207 ) 
 
 I am naturally aspiring, and you shew the 
 consequences of applying or misapplying this 
 disposition : I have indeed thirsted after fame, 
 fortune, pleasure; owned they were empty 
 shadows ; and yet could not refrain from pur- 
 suing them : but blessed be God, the rapid 
 stream is in a measure turned ; now, I think 
 that I thirst only for the ^^ fountain oflhing 
 Water, '^^ I believe I was never in earnest 
 about the salvation of my soul, until the last 
 winter; then it pleased God to lay a slight 
 sickness on me, and at the same time to 
 open my eyes to the danger I was in : the 
 terrors of Dcruh j^ot lioIU upou me I I appre- 
 hended I was near my end, my fears were 
 alarmed ! I dare not look death in the face ! 
 my conscience accused me of all the evils I 
 had committed, against light, against myself^ 
 my neighbour and my God ; O what would 
 -I then give for an interest in Jesus ; but tho' 
 I prayed earnestly, I found my heart as ada^ 
 mant ; I feared, I trembled, but could not 
 weep, believe, or love. Then, Then, I saw 
 that faith was the gift of God; and that he 
 might justly withdraw it from me, who had 
 so often sinned with my eyes open; and 
 
( 208 ) 
 
 grieved his Holy Spirit :...at last my spirit 
 became somewhat composed, and my health 
 returned. When I got up, my heart was 
 bowed down, and oppressed with a guilty 
 load ; I took the bible, and the first place I 
 opened was, the 53d. chapter of Isaiah ; I 
 read, and immediately felt my heart softened, 
 I continued to read until I came to that glori- 
 ous invitation, '' Ho every one that thirsteth, 
 come ye to the waters ; and he that hath no 
 money, come ye, buy and eat ; yea, come, 
 buy wine and n-ilk, rjhhout money ^ and 'ivith- 
 out price.^* Tlien I broke out involuntarily. 
 Into a refreshing flood of tears ; I read, and 
 ^vept, and prayed by turns, and thought I 
 had faith to lay hold on the promise ; I felt 
 that I loved Jesus, I saw that he was willing 
 to be reconciled to irje, and yet some strange 
 doubt interposed, and I did not believe that I 
 was yet savingly converted ;...Idared not pre- 
 sume to say, that *' God bad forgiven all my 
 sins," this is staggering at the promise through 
 unbelief....! have been struggling with this 
 unbelief all the summer, sometimes I find 
 Any heart enlarged, and I can love God, and 
 the verv name of Jesus ; can love liis chi^- 
 
( 209 ) 
 
 ^ren unfeignedly, can even love my enemies : 
 again I find a hard heart, unworthy thoughts 
 of my Redeemer &c. : then again these are 
 dispersed, and I feel a kind aftection for him 
 return, This is as nearly as I can describe 
 the state of my soul. I hope, and believe 
 that God v^ill soon disperse the mists. Shine 
 upon my soul, and clear up my evidence for 
 Heaven : Amen, even so, come Lord Jesus, 
 come quickly !... Though I meet with many 
 trials in life, feel a great deal of perplexity 
 in and from my business, and find it hard 
 to get forward with my worldly concerns ; 
 yet blessed be God, I sit in a measure loose 
 to the world, and am resolved it shall not 
 have all my heart : O cease not to pray for 
 your affectionate friend : 
 
 JOHN STRETTON, 
 
 lettji:r xciii. 
 
 Mr. John Stretton...to Mrs Eliza Bennis. 
 
 Harbour gr ace ^ November 14, 17/'5- 
 
 MY VERY L>EAR MRS. BENNIS. 
 
 YOU desire to know, who preaches 
 here, since Mr. Coughlan's departure : I shall 
 give you a short account, of the state of the 
 S 2 
 
( ^^0 ) 
 
 Church.... After Mr. Coughlan's saUing for 
 Europe, the Justices (his avowed enemies) 
 took upon them to read prayers in the Church, 
 and laboured with all their might, to mtro- 
 duce the dullest formality in the room of the 
 pure gospel, which he had preached ; and 
 partly succeeded therein ; those that had re- 
 ceived the truth under him used to meet as 
 a class, in the Church on Sabbath evenings ; 
 but now iheir Worships would ilot suffer it. 
 Mr. Arthur Thomey,(a respectable mer- 
 chant, who was converted under Mr. C.) 
 Ciud I, being disgusted with this mode of ac- 
 tion in the Justises ; resolved to oppose the 
 torrent of iniquity ; we gathered a few togath- 
 er, who we believe loved the Lord Jesus ; 
 and found amongst them, a pcor illiterate 
 fisherman, that was not ashamed of his Heaven- 
 ly master ; who boldly stood up, and spoke 
 in his n'ime ; him we constantly attend to 
 hear :...Mr, Thomey also exhorts, and is en- 
 dowed with both gifts and grace ; this is 
 done from house to house. We have joined 
 ourselves into a society, and have drawn up 
 rules as like Mr. Wesley as we could, con- 
 sistent v/ith local circumstances, our num- 
 
( iili ) 
 
 ber about thirty, who I believe are bincere 
 in heart. 
 
 At Carbonear about three miles from this ; 
 the people attend to hear a Mr. Pottle, who 
 also received the truth under Mr. Coughlan : 
 he reads prayers and expounds to them : but 
 these have not yet formed themselves into a 
 society : though some of them meet as a 
 class, and are sincere followers of the Lamb. 
 
 Last October, a minister came to reside 
 in Harbour Grace, in the room of Mr. Cough- 
 lan ; he was sent by the '' Society lor propo- 
 gating Christian knowlege," to Trinity bay, 
 about fourteen years since ; and in all that 
 time, there has not one soul, been awakened 
 under him : I much fear the consequence 
 of his coming here : He is a man of letters 
 but oh ! he is blind : though our society now 
 attend his preaching, and received the Sacra- 
 ment at his hands last Sunday ; yet we 
 continue to meet as before, following Mr. 
 Wesley, in ail things as near as we can. This 
 is the state of the Church, in this wilderness ; 
 (and this is the only part of New-foundland 
 where the truth has yet been received.) I 
 shall now say something of myself j and to 
 
( 212 ) 
 
 be circumstantial, must inform you, that 
 our Society celebrated last Christmas day 
 as the methodistsdo in Europe; (it was the 
 first time of our drawing up rules.) In the 
 morning before day, we sung the Nativity 
 Hymns &c. and at night had a love feast : I 
 gave out and raised the hymns : all the day 
 my mind was agitated, and my body disor- 
 dered ; in the evening I grew very sick, and 
 the distress upon my mind encreased : I was 
 tempted to go to bed ; however, I resolved 
 if possible, to go through with the love 
 feast ; just before we began I went to prayer 
 alone, darkness overwhelmed my soul ; yet 
 in the midst I said, if I die, or if I perish, 
 better perish thus crying for mercy. I went, 
 and began with the first of Mr. Wesley's love 
 feast hymns ; no sooner had I given out the 
 first lines, viz. 
 
 " Come, ami let us sweetly join, 
 " Christ to praise in hymns divine.*' 
 
 and mentioned the sacred name of Christ ; 
 but my heart glowed with affection : I burst 
 out into tears, and continued with flowing 
 eyes, to give out and sing the rest of the 
 hymn; until I came to these lines ; 
 
( 213 j 
 
 •• Christ huth burst the bands of Death ! 
 " We his quick'ning- spirit breath ." 
 
 then, O then I was so overpowered, that. I 
 could neither give out nor sing any more : 
 I felt all the force of the expression ; I then 
 that moment felt, that he had burst the bands 
 of Death in my soul; and that I did then 
 breath his quick'ning spirit: all present were 
 greatly affected ; and a backslider that night 
 professed to have found with me, the quick- 
 ning influence of the spirit of our Lord : this 
 was a night much to be remembered ; Jesus 
 sprinkled my soul, with his precious blood ; 
 and the destroying Attgel had no power to 
 hurt : I went to bed veiy much disordered 
 in body, but my mind calm : but immediate- 
 ly I began to doubt ; I could not believe that 
 this was true faith ; now I was left in dark- 
 ness again ; I knew not what to do, at last 
 I concluded that as I could not believe, I was 
 one of the fearful, that are mentioned in the 
 Revelations, to be without the New-Jerusa- 
 lem: I told my fears to my friend Thomey, he 
 said my thoughts were false and vain ; and 
 asserted that the fearful above mentioned, 
 were those who were afraid of Man, and asham- 
 
( 214 } 
 
 cd of Jesus ; yet I could not believe, until 
 he proved his assertion, by the Notes of Mr. 
 Wesley, and others en the text : now my 
 doubts vanished, light broke in again upon 
 my soul, his words were like dew ; blessed 
 be God, I yet find Jesus precious to my soul ; 
 when I find I iove him^ it is an evidence to 
 me of my acceptance. As to temporals^ 
 I have gone through the furnace this summer; 
 but I believe God will bring me out of ail my 
 troubles : I greatly approve of the Journal 
 you recommend me to keep, and think noiv 
 to begin it : Lord help me, I am a poor un- 
 faithful creature, and have a poor stock of 
 experience to begin with. I note every part 
 of your letter, and particularly request you to 
 write me a long and plain one, next spring 
 your letters are always useful and welcome 
 to your truly Affectionate Friend, 
 
 JOHN STRETTON. 
 
 LKTTER XCIV. 
 Mr. John Stretton.,..to Mrs. Mliza Bennis. 
 Harbour GracCy November 8, 1776. 
 
 MY DEAR SISTER BENNIS. 
 
 -DO you think me worthy ofbein^j call 
 
C ^15 ) 
 
 ed a Brother, in the best of bonds ? I cannot 
 think myself wordiy of such an honourable 
 appellation even at present ; for O how litde 
 of the mind that was in Christ is found in me; 
 and when God is pleased to give me a sense 
 of my heart, I find it still a cage of unclean 
 birds : I know and feel, that my work is not 
 done now, that I am enabled to believe : I 
 have a w hole carnal mind, that is enmity itself 
 to subdue ; and there are spiritual wickedness 
 in high places to be overcome ; who is suffi- 
 cient for these things ? none but Christ ; he 
 conquered for fne, and I trust he will con- 
 quer in me too ; until all his enemies and 
 mine are destroyed : The enemy of souls 
 has often assaulted me, since I have tasted 
 that the Lord is gracious, but blessed be God 
 for free grace ; my Jesus saved me when I 
 could not save myself ; I know sometimes 
 that I love him, and I desire to do his will ; 
 but when I do not feel this flame in my heart, 
 and clouds and darkness rest upon my soul ; 
 yet still my desire is towards i?iw; for without 
 kis presence^ I cannot take delight in any cre- 
 ated good. This in short is the general 
 course of my experience, the last year; last 
 Christmas I began to exhort amongst our 
 
( S16 ) 
 
 little society, very unwillingly ; for it was re 
 duced to this alternative, either for me to un- 
 dertake the superintendance, or see the Soci- 
 ety decay ; then I thought myself called in 
 the order of providence to do what I could ; 
 but still I am not persuaded, that I am call- 
 ed of God to preach his word ; and should 
 be glad if some person more worthy, and fit- 
 ter for the work, was here to keept hese few 
 sheep together, and do them good ; the reason 
 I have to think so is this ; there has not one 
 soul been awakened by my speaking, that I 
 know of, now near a year; I ventured to 
 speak in public to a number of people almost 
 savage, in the upper part of this bay, where 
 business called me this summer ; but I 
 know not that any good was done ; now 
 I greatly fear being one of those that run, 
 when they are not sent ; yet if I know myself 
 I think that in this I seek not my own glory 
 and I fear to decline acting thus, least 1 should 
 offend God and bring guilt upon my own soul. 
 My Dear Sister pray earnestly for me, that I 
 may persevere unto the end. 
 
 I assure you this is a trying countr}-, and 
 I believe as perplexing a business as any in 
 
( 2ir ) 
 
 the world ; yet, there was one month this year, 
 when I was engaged in the most complicated 
 parts of it ; and (O amazing mercy and un- 
 bounded grace !) I never enjoyed a more calm 
 serenity in my life ; therefore I conclude that 
 no outward thing can effect the soul; if it keeps 
 close to Christ: I wish I did so always. Lord 
 help me I am a strange inconsistent creature ! 
 Would you think well, to consult Mr. Wes- 
 ley about my doubts of being called to speak 
 in public ; and let me have his opinion thro* 
 you. May the Lord Jesus, the good Shep- 
 herd of the Sheep, keep you safe to the Day 
 of Eternity ; prays your affectionate Brother, 
 JOHN STRETTON. 
 
 LETTER XCV. 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis...to Mr John Stretton. 
 
 Limerick, March 22, 1777 • 
 Dear Brother Stretton, 
 MAY he who has called you by his grace, 
 to the great work wherein you are engaged, 
 still keep you and make you faithful in your 
 calling ; your unfitness is no barr in his way 
 who can send by whom he will ; and general- 
 ly chooses foolish and base instruments, that 
 
( 218 ) 
 
 his power and grace may be manifest to all : 
 Blessed be God that he does give you to feel 
 your poverty, you have need of it, how oft 
 would you have fallen through the pride of 
 your ov/n heart, if you had not this view of 
 yourself; how gracious is it then, to keep 
 us within sight of ourselves, that we may be 
 equally ballanced ; and by feeling our neces- 
 sities be led to look for help where only it 
 is to be found ; by our own experience, and 
 that of others, we may notice, whatever bles- 
 sing God is willing to bestow, he first gives 
 lis to feel the want of; he deals tenderly ; does 
 not break our spirits by discovering to us all at 
 once the w^hole hateful picture of our heart ; 
 but by little and little as we are able to bear 
 and with this view points out to us the remedy 
 also ; like the discovery of a rich mine, 
 which though stored with inestimable trea- 
 sure, yet requires labour to put us into the 
 possession of it, we must dig before we reach 
 the pearl; and if we would carry on the illu- 
 sion, suppose to yourself a poor Beggar, hav- 
 ing a discovery made to him of hid treasure; 
 who instead of immediately exerting himself 
 to dig and be rich, sits down on the spot to 
 
( 219 ) 
 
 weep for his poverty ; what would you say to 
 such ? would you not upbraid him for his 
 folly ? and bid him arise and seize the oppor- 
 tunity put into his hands. ...but suppose this 
 man instead of doing so, still pleads his pover- 
 ty as an excuse for his indolence ; sits still 
 and contents himself, with discovering the 
 treasure to every passenger w^ho goes by : 
 Need I make the application ? does not your 
 own heart prevent me ? what hinders your 
 deliverance ? the Lord has given you to feel 
 your need, to feci the bitterness of sin ; and 
 has also discovered to you the remedy, then 
 what hinders ? will you plead your pov- 
 erty ? v/hy this is the very thing should 
 drive you forward ; the good physician came 
 not to heal the whole, but to cure the sick 
 of every malady ; O come taste, and sec, how 
 good he is ! do not be content with recom- 
 mending the blessing to others, this is holding 
 the door open to all to pass through but 
 yourself; the Lord bids you come, he asks 
 !** JVilt thou be made w/W^'' O let all excuses 
 J laid aside, and venture your iv bole soul on 
 [his atoning blood ; trust him, prove him and 
 ^ ^u shall find hinrall that he haspromisedto be. 
 
( 220 ) 
 
 1 forget that I am writing to a Preacher ^ 
 from whom I should receive instruction ; the 
 earnestness of my soul for you, carries me be- 
 yond my limits ; I shall make no other apo- 
 logy than that I love your soul, and would 
 have you as happy as God can make you : O 
 may he remove every hindrance, and that his 
 hand may not be stayed, see that you be a fel- 
 low worker together with him, lop off every 
 thing that might be a hindrance to his work 
 on your heart ; let nothing be too 1 ittle or too 
 great to part withj often very small things lj» 
 hinder, because we are apt to hug these to our 
 bosom, thinking that God v/ill not dispute 
 with us for such a triPx ; and though his spi- 
 rit reproves for it, yet we pass it by ; still 
 thinking that it is too small to be sin :....But 
 my Dear friend, be honest and ingenuous 
 with God : search your own heart, and be 
 jviiling that God should see it all, and point 
 out every lurking evil ; and see that you on 
 every such discovery, cut ofi the right hand : 
 remember that " Flesh and blood cannot enter 
 the Kino-dom of Heaven." If we will follow 
 Christ, we must deny ourselves, and take up'; 
 our Cross, and follow him manfully ; else he 
 
( 221 ) 
 
 will not receive us ; the indulging the flesh 
 in Meat, Drink, Sleep, Indolence or pleasure, 
 will as efFectually damn the soul, as open sin. 
 God has given us a clear light to walk by ; 
 and he expects from us in proportion to what 
 , we have received ; May the Lord help us to 
 consider our calling, and to walk wisely and 
 surely before him : and to this end what great 
 need have we of watchfulness ! 
 
 INliglit not the Devil himself be our exam- 
 ple in this ? he watches continually, and often 
 finds us sleeping, and never fails to avail him- 
 self of our indolence : O then be watchful, be 
 humble ; consider you have nothing that you 
 : have not received; and what talents you 
 • have, were given you for the good of ot-.crs ; 
 use them as his property who bestowed them, 
 not your own ; being assured that you must 
 render a strict account to your master, and 
 y theirs for whose use they were given. Be- 
 , ware how you desist from your labour ; the 
 Lord has called you to work in his vineyard, 
 wait then until he is pleased to dismiss you ; 
 but if you are self-willed, and will go before 
 you make out your days work, you are not 
 entitled to your penny ; but may flill under 
 T 2 
 
( 222 ) 
 
 the condemnation of the slothful servant, ^vho 
 hid his Lords money ; rather give cheerfully, 
 what the Lord has given graciously to you ; 
 if it be much, it is not yours ; if k be little, 
 he is able to encrease it ; leave that matter to 
 him. Cast your mite into his treasury, and 
 let him dispose of it as he sees fit. I am my 
 Dear Friend's sincerely Affectionate, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER XCVI. 
 
 Mr. John Stretton...to Mrs. Eliza Bennis, 
 Harbour gr ace ^ June ^ 30, 1777. 
 I THANK my very Dear Sister Ben- 
 nis, for your sweet letter of last March ; I 
 gladly embrace the present uncommon oppor- 
 tunity to write, and do most earnestly beg a 
 letter from you immediately^ as the ship re- 
 turns without making much delay in Ireland. 
 
 It is the desire of my heart, to attain to 
 that perfect love, you have so well described 
 in your letter, but yet how far short of it do 
 I come ! surely you must have experienced 
 what you wrote, else your arguments could 
 not be so conclusive ; if you think me wor- 
 thy, let me know ; I humbly hope it would 
 
not he ^^ casting pearls before swirie^^ ; 1 
 agree with you in sentiment, and do believe 
 this perfection attainable ; for our God is Al- 
 mighty to save, and strong to deliver ; and I 
 doubt not his willingness to save to the utter^ 
 most, them that come to him : your letter has 
 cleared up some doubts, and cast a light up- 
 on this subject ; nmch more than many hours 
 reading. Blessed be God for the least mea- 
 sure of his light, and I desire to bless his 
 holy name, for bringing me acquainted with 
 you. 
 
 You say you know I need not instruction 
 from you ; Indeed, my Dear Sister, you 
 would not speak thus, if you knew me as well 
 as I know myself; for after all my reading 
 (which I am very fond of,) I find myself 
 amazingly ignorant of spiritual things ; and 
 greatly feel the want of Christian converse ; 
 for the professors here, (except a few which 
 are dispersed) are very ignorant, and unfit 
 to keep up a conversation of any kind ; there- 
 fore let me have in your next, and always as 
 much of that sweet earnestness of heart, for 
 my spiritual welfare, as you can possibly ex- 
 press ; for I feel every line. With respect to 
 
ii24 ; 
 
 my experience, 1 liave to say, that I. ofteii 
 find Jesus Christ precious to my soul, and 
 when it is not so I am unhappy ; ^^'hen I feel 
 His Love every thing pleases; when he is 
 gone, the whole word is a wilderness ; 
 and Oh my Dear Sister ! you can hardly 
 think what barrenness, doubts, fears, sins, 
 perplexities, and evil tempers I have to grap- 
 ple with ; so that I sometimes think, nobody 
 is so violently assaulted as I am. Sometimes, 
 with all these upon me, I am obliged to stand 
 up in public to speak for God ; and often find 
 that my adorable master drives them a\\;ay, 
 cease not pray that my faith fail not, and that 
 my labour be not in vain, in the Winter 
 season, we have public preaching three times 
 a week, from house to house in the evenings ; 
 (not having yet any meeting house) and in 
 this^ I often have the cross to take up ; being 
 so situated, that I must cross an arm of the 
 sea for this purpose after night ; which in this 
 country, at that season is very dangerous and 
 disagreeable ; however I have found that my 
 God is all-sufficient... In Summer our meet- 
 ings can be only on Sundays ; as the fishing 
 business in which all here are employed pre- 
 
( 225 ) 
 
 vents meeting during the week ; not giving 
 sufficient time for necessary sleep and food : 
 however through many difficulties and dis- 
 couragements, all that first joined in Society 
 keep up together ; and one only has been ad- 
 ded : I cannot- omit mentioning here, a sweet 
 youth, of eighteen years old, (who made no 
 profession) in a sudden violent distemper 
 went to Heaven last March ; leaving a clear 
 testimony, of his dying in the Lord: last 
 Winter I travelled over land, in this desolate 
 country, about twenty-four miks : to a har- 
 bour that never heard the joyful sound ; but 
 my labour seemed in vain ; the people there, 
 but a remove from savage ; yet I have since 
 lelt, as if God would bless the seed then 
 sown. 
 
 Last spring Brother Thomey and I, went 
 to St. Johns, which lies about fourteen leagues 
 from us ; and there found Brethren ; one of 
 whom preaches ; the society only eight per- 
 sons, very poor ; and yet they have built a 
 neat little meeting house I to the admiration 
 ©f even the reprobate world ; we tarried with 
 them a few days; they are Calvinists, but 
 have the genuine mark of love ; and where- 
 
( 22G ) 
 
 ever that is met with, we should joyful!) 
 give the right hand of fellowship ] 
 
 " Let names nnd sects and parties fall, 
 " And Jesus Christ be all in all." 
 
 Farewell my Dear Mrs. Bennis, may the 
 Lord be your God in time and Eternity : 
 prays your weak, and unworthy Brother in 
 Christ. 
 
 JOHN STRETTON. 
 
 LETTER XCViL 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis... to Mr John Stretton. 
 
 Limerick^ Julij 24-, 1777 • 
 
 I YESTERDAY received my dear 
 Brother Stretton's welcome favour, of last 
 month ; and from a desire of giving you all 
 the satisfaction in my power, take the earli- 
 est opportunity of answering it :...If my last 
 has been in any wise blessed to your soul, 
 my end is answered ; let the praise be given 
 where only it is due, not to the instrument, 
 but to the hand which conducts it :...! thank 
 our gracious Lord on your behalf, I do find 
 you bound on my heart before the throne of 
 grace :... Blessed be God that you do feel it 
 the desire of your heart, to attain to that per- 
 fect love, which is the privilege of the r\\\\. 
 
( 2 
 
 di'cn of God : without this desire, and an 
 earnest pressing after it, you would be scarce 
 able to retain what you have already received : 
 and indeed I have observed, that every soul 
 after having received a sense of pardon, is 
 led by a natural, or rather supernatural pro- 
 pensity, to seek after a farther and deeper 
 work of grace ; this I think may discover to 
 us, that it is not only our privilege ; but if 
 I may use the expression, our ** right of in- 
 heritance ;" our purchased possession, our 
 land of Canaan ; to inherit which we were 
 called out of Kgypt, led through the wilder- 
 ness, fought many battles, and encountered 
 many dangers : you may ask, then why do 
 not all experience it? the Apostle tells us be- 
 cause of unbelief ; as it was with the Israel- 
 ites ; they were brought out of Egypt, cross- 
 ed the Red-sea, fed on the manna, drank 
 of the rock, tasted of the grapes ; yet by rea- 
 son of unbelief never attained to the Inheri- 
 tance :...Ni w apply the allegory in your own 
 mind, and sec if the comparison will not 
 hold ? if so what hinders ? are you brought 
 •to Jordans banks ? can you look and see the 
 goodly prospect ? and arc the taste of the 
 
( 228 ) 
 
 grapes delicious ? then away with your cow- 
 ardice ; think not of the tall sons of Anack, 
 nor the high walls of Jerico, nor the broad 
 river of Jordon ! let none of these affright or 
 retard my friend ; but look up, and see who 
 leads the way ! what are all your hindrances 
 before the all pov^erful Jesus, the captain of 
 your Salvation : then do not delay, reasoning 
 about it ; but bravely determine to venture on 
 the word, and promise of him who cannot 
 lie ; and trusting in him, say with old coura- 
 geous Caleb, ** We are "iuell able to go up, 
 and take the good land ;" be encouraged, be- 
 lieve, and entCT in ; may the Lord help you 
 to try him 7ioix) ; to put his goodness to the 
 proof this moment: whilst you are reading 
 this letter ; believe that he has purchased this 
 great freedom, this inestimable privilege^ 
 this unspeakable deliverance for you ; that 
 he is wow this moment willing to bestow it ; 
 that is it even reached out to you, with en-, 
 treaties to accept it : then no longer refuse 
 your own mercies, now dare to believe ^R: 
 spite of the Devil : venture your soul upon 
 him, and see if he will not be faithful to his 
 grace : O do not unbelievingly draw back, 
 
( 229 ) 
 
 rather presumptuously believe, and the Lord 
 will confirm it to your soul ; remember the 
 Kingdom of Heaven suifereth violence, and 
 the Lord of Heaven loveth and yieldeth to 
 the violence of faith and prayer. 
 
 In the earnestness of my heart I can almost 
 believe for you ; may the Lord help you to 
 believe for yourself; indeed until you do, you 
 can never be happy : but when you do, take 
 care you do not look for, or expect more in 
 that state, than God has promised ; remember 
 it is not a deliverance from temptations, trials, 
 or natural infirmities ; but a deliverance from 
 Sin. If you keep this in view, it will much 
 clear your way, and answer many doubts and 
 perplexities which Satan may cast into your 
 mind; it will also help you to bear the re- 
 proach, and answer the either real or scoffing 
 questions Vv'hich may be asked of you con- 
 cerning this state ; for when once you declare 
 the glad tidings of Sanctification, you set your- 
 self up, as a mark for the seeking Soul to fol- 
 low after ; and for the scoffer to jeer at : and 
 you will be likely to meet with fitr more of 
 the latter than of the former, therefore remem» 
 ber^ you are to be always ready to give an an- 
 U 
 
( 230 ) 
 
 svver for the ** hope that is in you" ; and this 
 will be more frequently sought for, iii your 
 general outward conduct and conversation ; 
 than by answers to particular questions ; then 
 what manner of persons should we be, (who 
 profess the Lord Jesus to be a complete Sa'vi^ 
 our) in all holy living and conversation. 
 
 You ask, if I have experienced this perfec- 
 tion , indeed my Dear friend, your question 
 has put my very heart to the blush; I do not 
 choose to bnng in my experience as a stand- 
 ard for any ; I have cause of shame and self- 
 reproach because of my unfaithfulness : yet 
 for your satisfaction I must do my good 
 and gracious God justice ; to the praise of 
 bis holy and ever blessed name, I acknow- 
 lege, that I, unworthy as I am, have been 
 made paitaker of this great grace : a witness 
 of his power, to save to t^e uttermost all that 
 come to him ; and had I been faithful to his 
 grace, since the year 1763. I might be now 
 a pattern to others :...but make no man your 
 standard, look to your Lord Jesus, who saysj^ 
 ** be ye holy for I am holy ^"^"^ and when you 
 meet with blots and flaws in the greatest pro- 
 fessor's ; remember our Lord's words, ** i\:hat 
 
( 231 ) 
 
 is that to thee.foUov) thou me^'^y be determiti- 
 cd to be as holy and as happy as God is willing 
 to make you ; and indeed you never can be 
 completely happy, until the Lord has full 
 possession of your heart ; until the root of 
 bitterness, the evil propensity is taken out 
 of your heart ; then you shall find it your 
 meat and drink to do his will j because you 
 love him with all your heart, and love makes 
 all things easy... this love is the fulfilling of the 
 law : for whilst we love, we cannot break any 
 of his commandments : because we love him, 
 we love all his laws ; and love leads us wil- 
 lingly into all obedience : all constraint is ta- 
 ken aw^ay, love leads us as by a natural pro- 
 pensity to do his will ; and it is not grievous 
 because we do only what we love.... My ex- 
 planation is very imperfect, may the Lord 
 write it clearly on your heart ; and surely he 
 will, his word is not yea and nay, hvXyca 
 and Amen ; sure as the pillars of Heaven : 
 open your mouth ivide and and he will fill it ; 
 if you open it but a little, you will get but 
 a little morsel j but wide and exicnshe as your 
 desires can stretchy the povver of God extends ; 
 ind his willingness will bestow : our faith 
 
( 232 ) 
 
 only can limit his bounty ; he puts a blank 
 into our hands, to fill up for ourselves ; and 
 Gays ** be it unto you, according to your 
 faith.'' O my Dear Friend, here is a door 
 thrown wide open ; will you not now haste 
 to enter, to believe, see and experience the 
 wonders of redeeming love : I long for your 
 complete deliverance, and feel my own soul 
 happy, in the prospect of your happiness ; 
 O that I could say any thing, that could con- 
 tribute to it J may the Lord speak to your 
 heart, take away the hindrance and force 
 you to. believe.... Be zealous, be diligent, ac- 
 tive and laborious for God ; and be content 
 with your station ; yo u know not for what 
 end the Lord has sent or placed you where 
 you are : but be assured it is for good, then 
 take up your cross, willingly abandoning 
 yourself to his care, and welcoming his 
 will, whatever it be : seek wisdom, and chris- 
 tian experience from him ; and you shall not 
 feel the want of society; he will be more 
 to you than many helps,... I wish you to pur- 
 sue the Diary, that I formerly recommend- 
 ed ; you will find it a great help ; I have of 
 ten experienced much comfort in reading 
 
( 233 ) 
 
 oyer past experience, and have often felt hap- 
 piness and support in comparing past with 
 present....! earnestly recommend you not to 
 neglect it, but buy up opportunities for that 
 purpose ; only, do not write much at a time, 
 that it be not burthensome ; except when 
 lyour heart is particularly enlarged ; then it 
 may not be well to cramp yourself, but 
 let your heart and pen flow together, to the 
 glory of God....M^y the Lord bless you with 
 all your hearts desire, and give you suc- 
 cess in your labours.... Prays your sincere 
 Friend . 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS, 
 
 LETTER XCVIIL 
 Mr, John Stretton...to Mrs Eliza Bennis. 
 
 Harbourgraccy November 30, 1777, 
 
 MY BEAR SISTER BENNIS. 
 
 I THANK you, for your very affection^ 
 ate letter of lasJt July ; and for your condescen- 
 sion, in answering that question I pnoposed ; 
 be assured it was not idle curiosity that indu- 
 ced me to ask it : but a desire to have some 
 secret doubts resolved, and your answer has 
 satisfied them : I am nov/ fully pasuaded, 
 U2 
 
( 234 
 
 that perfect love is attainable in this life ; and 
 in consequence of this persuasion, I proclaim 
 the joyful news to others : but I do not expe- 
 rience it myself; I find in me, mountains of 
 unbelief, of pride, the whole body of sin to 
 grapple with : I feel siniin my prayers, and in 
 all my performances; and do frequently experi- 
 ence, what Mr. Whitfield observed of him- 
 self ; '' that he never preached or prayed well, 
 but he found the enemy near, s^iyiug iveil done 
 George^' — .These things make me often groan 
 in secret ; and sometimes I am ready to con- 
 clude, that on these accounts, I had better 
 cease speaking in public ; but when I see the 
 absolute necessity there is for it, and consider 
 that it might prove the disjointing of our So- 
 ciety; I again change my mind, and abandon 
 myself, fiying for protection to my Lord and 
 master, and when I do this he comforts me * 
 I have taken your advice as to the diary; and 
 hope it may be profitable : but being often 
 from home on my blessed masters business, 
 and sometimes on my own, occasions disorder 
 in it ; but I still intend to continue it, as well 
 as circumstances will admit. Our little so- 
 ciety neither encreases nor decreases; the 
 
( 235 ) 
 
 generality of the people in this place are very 
 wicked, and the dead ministry makes them 
 quite regardless of hearing the truth : few 
 here but had some serious impressions, while 
 Mr. Coughlan was here ; and these having 
 drawn back, cannot now bear to hear the 
 truth ; therefore keep from our meetings : a 
 few days past, I was called to speak to a very 
 great audience: a mixed multitude, at the fu- 
 neral of one of our friends who died in the 
 Lord; the minister w^as present, a learned 
 scribe, filled with the lumber of the schools : 
 before I began, I felt some perturbation ; but 
 looking to the Lord, he enabled me to declare 
 his truth with boldness ; and to preach repen- 
 tance towards God, and faith in our Lord Je- 
 sus Christ ; proving this to be the doctrine 
 of the Church of England from the articles, 
 Homilies and Liturgy of that Church. The 
 learned and Reverend Doctor, when I had done 
 gave an extempore oration, of about five 
 minutes ; did not gainsay, nor enforce what I 
 had advanced ; his language seemed as hea- 
 then greek to the audience in general; he 
 ^poke much of the plastic power of Nature 
 
( 2S6 ) 
 
 of the dignity, and mortality of Man, but not 
 one word of the New Birth : 1 afterwards un- 
 derstood that some were aifected with the 
 truths they had heard ; but O our enemies 
 are not idle, we are scoffed and jeered at by al- 
 most all ; we have many trials to go through, 
 many crosses to take up ; O pray for us, and 
 get the select society to join you, in supplica- 
 ting God for a revival in this wilderness. 
 
 I shall anxiously expect a long letter next 
 spring, and therein speak plain, rebuke and 
 exhort freely, for indeed all from you shall be 
 most thankfully received ; I have much rea- 
 son to thank God for your letters, and that 
 ever he laid me on your heart ; surely I am a 
 brand plucked from the burning: the Lord 
 grant I may appear as a star in your crow|i 
 of glory. May he bless you, and make you 
 instrumental in his hand of doing much more 
 good; is the sincere prayer of your truly Af- 
 fectionate, &c. 
 
 JOHN STRETTON. 
 
( 237 ) 
 
 LETTER XCIX. 
 
 Mr. John Stretton...to Mrs. Eliza Bcnnis, 
 Harbour-grace^ Deceynber 2, i77B» 
 It was late this fall, when I received 
 my Dear Mrs. Bennis*s letter : and it proved 
 as ail the former, very profitable to me; 
 though I have not attained the end it had in 
 view. I hope your united prayers were heard 
 in our behalf, for last Winter the Gospel 
 trump was sounded through this desart land 
 Aviih some success, the people in the place 
 where we live,being almost weary of the word 
 my fellow labourer (Mr.Thomey) and I made 
 an excurtion of about sixty miles along the 
 wild shores of this dreary country at Christ- 
 mas, preaching in every place inhabited. The 
 people flocked to hear, and were greatly plea- 
 sed with the welcome sound. We again 
 and again repeated our visits, in Qne place 
 where was but four dry professors, a society 
 was soon established of thirty-seven, near all 
 believers, in one evening at a love feast, five 
 were set at liberty ; open profligates convin- 
 ced and converted, also two aged sinners call- 
 <ed in, one of one hundred years old, the other 
 
( 238 ) 
 
 of eighty, who are yet alive. Surely nothing 
 is too hard for our God. It would delight 
 your heart, to see old and young flocking to 
 the ordinances, in the most inclement weather, 
 from one to five miles distant : at Pelican 
 (near fifty miles from this) we met with an 
 aged disciple called Haskins, who has gather- 
 ed a little society j he was a member of Mr. 
 Wesley's society in England near thirty years 
 since: and enjoys the perfect love of God j 
 he and w^e were much comforted and strength- 
 ened by this visit. In St. Johns a few sol- 
 diers and servants joined themselves in socie- 
 ty, and though few and very poor, have built 
 themselves a neat meeting house; w^e visited 
 these also, their society prospers ; they are 
 Galvinists, but live the life of faith, and love 
 is even manifest in their faces. The little 
 society where I live, is at present in a very 
 disordered state ; the thorns and thistles are 
 ready to destroy the good seed, the people 
 a^e mostly very poor, the place in genera! 
 growing more and more wicked, and a carnal 
 minister makes them worse, so that those 
 who arc not of our society, will not even come 
 to hear. ' 
 
{ 239 ) 
 
 I ccntinu^ to labour without intermission, 
 though I meet with violent opposition both 
 from within and from without, this last sum- 
 mer I have endured the most grievous trials 
 I ever met with, through my dealings with 
 evil men. The customs, manners and trade 
 of this land is in my apprehension contrary to 
 pure and undefiled religion : and it is remark- 
 able that religion on these accounts flourish 
 most in the winter season, when business is 
 at a total stand. Blessed be God I am not yet 
 quite overcome by mine enemies, though it 
 sometimes seems as if all the powers of Hell 
 were combined against me ; I hope tribula- 
 tion is working patience in me : my soul suf- 
 fers on account of others ; I feel their woes, 
 I grieve for their faults, and I lament for their 
 ignorance, carnality and spleen. May the 
 Lord Jesus pity the few scattered sheep in this 
 place, that the w^olfe is ready to devour : O 
 pray for us, call on all those with you, w^ho 
 love the Lord Jesus Christ in sincerity and 
 truth, to join you in storming the throne of 
 Grace on our behalf, that w^e be not swallov/ed 
 up by our enemies....! must entreat you to 
 continue a correspondence so beneficial to me^ 
 
let me have a letter in the spring, and O 
 cheer my drooping spirits, for I am a poor 
 creature, Lord help me:... may he forever 
 dwell with you, and may you be useful to 
 many others, as you have hitherto been to 
 your unworthy Brother, but most grateful 
 Friend. 
 
 ' JOHN STRETTON. 
 
 LETTER C. 
 Mr. John Stretton...to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 Harbour gr ace ^ December 18, 1779. 
 MY very Dear Sister Bennis's letter of 
 last spring proved a comfort in time of need ; 
 blessed be my good God, I have this year 
 experienced much of his goodness to me, 
 and found his providential care over me in 
 all my undertakings. The summer before 
 last, all my property had like to be swallow- 
 ed up by the subtilty of wicked and design- 
 ing men ; who set themselves against me, be- 
 cause I openly reproved sin : they did me 
 much hurt, but God has turned it to my 
 gGod....Last Januaiy I v/as very near death 
 with a quinsey, the effects of a severe jour- 
 ney taken that \vinter along this dcsart shore, 
 
doing I trust my Master's business. Last Au- 
 gust I entered on a new business, having for 
 the present given up the fishery, and commen- 
 ced Shopkeeping ; here I found that the hearts 
 of all, even of the wricked, are in the hands of 
 God, for instantly I had many of the gentlemen 
 here ready to assist me : most of these a few 
 months past were as ready to abuse me be- 
 cause I publickly condemned their doings ; 
 yet now they gave me encouragement without 
 my seeking their good will ; and what is bet- 
 ter than all, God has blessed and is blessing 
 my endeavours. 
 
 I am now jealous of my heart, business en- 
 gages much of my thoughts, yet still I think 
 that I would not give up my God for ten thou* 
 sand worlds : O that I may never be guilty 
 of the base idolatry, of worshiping the gift, 
 and forgeting the giver. 
 
 With difficulty the professors here are kept 
 together, and I think my business has not pre- 
 vented my constantly attending on them everv 
 appointed time. Another remarkable Mercy 
 I have to mention ; the man that most griev- 
 ously injured me last year, both in name and 
 property, was last September taken Sick ; on 
 X 
 
( 242 ) 
 
 a Monday he was in a high fever, and wicked 
 beyond description, blaspheming &:c. on the 
 brink of black despair : Tuesday night he 
 sent for me, I forgave him all he had said and 
 done to me, talked and prayed with him : 
 that night and Wednesday he laboured under 
 strong convictions; Wednesday night I sat by 
 him expecting his death he was then calm 
 and resigned ; Thursday he was better, and 
 rejc^icing in God his Saviour. On Monday 
 . li, on Thursday a Saint : Behold ! 
 2i imire the power of changing Grace. Since 
 this he has joined our Society, and I hope will 
 continue faithful ; my Dear Sister my Spiri- 
 tual Mother, my Best Friend ; continue to 
 pray for me, and cease not to comfort me by 
 your ^affectionate advice. May the Lord bless 
 you with every blessing of the Upper and 
 Nether Spring, is the unceasing prayer of 
 JOHN STRETTON. 
 
 LETTER CI. 
 Mr. John Stretlon...to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 Harbour -grace, June 29, 1785. 
 AFTER a silence of five years, I was 
 exceeding glad to find, that my very Dear 
 
( 243 ) 
 
 Sister Bennis, my mother, my friend was 
 still alive ; for 1 had heard you was remov- 
 ed to your eternal rest, but blessed be God 
 you are yet spared to do more good in the 
 earth :... I suppose you have lately seen Mr. 
 Wesley, and possibl}^ have had some con- 
 versation with him about me ; I wrote to 
 him last Fall, to send a preacher to this place, 
 as the work of God seems to be at a stand 
 here, and superstition and profaneness great- 
 ly encreasing; he answered my letter, told me 
 of Dr. Coke being in America, and said he 
 would write to him to call here before he- 
 returned to England :..,but he is not yet arri- 
 ved:.. surely if he comes, he will find this a de- 
 solate wilderness, and that it requires the spi«^ 
 rit of martyrdom to carry on the work here : 
 my Dear Friend and fellow labourer Arthur 
 Thomey, who was instrumental in the con- 
 version of many souls, and laboured inces- 
 santly many years in his Lords vine}'ard, is 
 called hence to receive his eternal reward; 
 he went to Portugal last November on bu- 
 siness: just landed there, was in good health 
 going to bed, and was found dead in the 
 morning : you can hardly conceive what I have 
 
( 244 ) 
 
 felt on this melancholy occasion; yet surely 
 God is love, though Icannot see through this 
 dark cloud !...0 write to Mr: Wesley, not to 
 forget us in this benighted corner ; I know 
 by experience that sweet persuasion dwells 
 upon your tongue, and can you exercise it for 
 a more beneficial purpose ? let not these souls 
 perish for lack of knowledge :..I still exercise 
 my poor talents, but the society is broken 
 up, and few come to hear me, and my pres- 
 ent business prevents the excursions I used 
 formerly to take:... yet blessed be God he 
 keeps my own soul in peace, sweetly stay- 
 ed upon Iiim, and expectantly looking to 
 him for a revival of his work even in this 
 place ; indeed were it not for this expecta- 
 tion, I should be tempted to return to Ire- 
 land ; if it was the Lord's w411, I would be 
 glad to see you before you die; but may he 
 direct. ...My Dear Sister, cease not pray for 
 me while } ou breath : I really believe your 
 prayers for me have been remarkably ans\yer- 
 ed : O I cannot describe what a comfort, it 
 brings to my mind in the midst of aiflictioos, 
 when I recollect, nay when I am sure, I h^ve 
 one faithful praying friend yet alive, may 
 
( 245 ) 
 
 the Lord Jesus bless you, bless you in time, 
 bless you in eternity, is the earnest prayer 
 of your sincere friend and brother. 
 
 JOHN STRETTON. 
 
 LETTER CII. 
 Mr. John Stretton...to Mrs. Eliza Bennis* 
 Harbour 'grace, No'demher 15, 1785. 
 I AM much obliged to my Dear Sister 
 Bennis for yours of last August : die Lord 
 has indeed supplied the place of Dear Tho- 
 mey ; for last month a preacher arrived here 
 from London, sent by Mr. Wesley ; his name 
 John Magery ; a good man, and a good 
 preacher ; I hope he will prove a blessing 
 to this place. 
 
 We wanted one given wholly to the worJc ; 
 I see that a preacher should not be entangled 
 with the affairs of this life. My heart is ready 
 to accept your kind invitation, for be assured 
 it is not the desire of geting rich that has 
 kept me here ; but I have been waiting tOisee 
 the motion of the incumbent cloud. If I 
 had left this, the very appearance of religion 
 had vanished, and I dare not desert my post 
 until lawfully discharged : yet if the Lore} 
 X'2 ' 
 
C 246 ) 
 
 permits me to see Ireland, I would think \itit 
 of travelling one hundred miles to see you : 
 you who I may with propriety call my Mo- 
 ther in the Gospel : may the Lord encom- 
 pass you with his favour as with a shield. You 
 may well say you know the comfort of reli- 
 gious society, but I know very litde of it, you 
 can hardly conceive my situation in this res- 
 pect, I may say that singly and alone, the 
 Lord has enabled me to withstand th.G whole 
 place where I dwell, but I am yet preserved 
 by the power of God, through your prayers : 
 blessed be God. Business prevents my en- 
 larging at present. O let me partake of your 
 thoughts, when you draw near to God* 
 
 December 12th, Every thing here appears 
 so disagreeable to Mr. Magery,. that I fear 
 he will not abide long. — indeed vvhcever seeks 
 ^ase or comfort is not likely to meet much of 
 it in this Island. — Blessed be God who has 
 so wonderfully kept and supported me for 
 many years in much weakness, in many trials 
 and sundry disagreeables, preaching a free 
 Gospel in this dreary Region: but when I 
 have been weak, then I was strong. An avi^- 
 fol providence happened here this Summery 
 
to a youth, whose family perhaps you knov/, 
 the son of Mn A .P. of Waterforcl : he had a 
 violent fever in July, my soul was pained for 
 him ; he just recovered, was saved with the 
 skin of his teeth ; w^ent on a party of pleasure 
 (so called) on a Sunday, to an Island a little 
 distance from this ; rolled oyer the Clifl', and 
 was taken up Dead, wounded, broken, brui- 
 sed ! I felt much on this occasion for I had 
 a great regard for the youth, and had spoken 
 much to him just before of the one thing need- 
 ful : O when will the young take heed to 
 their ways! farewell my dear Mother, forget 
 not your Affectionate Son in Christ, 
 
 JOHN STRETTON, 
 
 LETTER cm. 
 
 Mr John Stretton....to Mrs. Eliza Bennis 
 
 Harbour-grace^ November 18, ITSS* 
 MY Dear, old, faithful, afflicted friend > 
 I did, I do sympathise with you in the fur- 
 nace ; but what can I say to mitigate the se- 
 verity of the fire? May the Lord, the only 
 good, the just, the wiss be with you,, while 
 walking through the fire,, and it shall not kiiv 
 
i 2-18 ) 
 
 die upon you; bv and bvj Heaven will level 
 all diese distinctions in life, that men call for- 
 tunate and unfortunate ; and then we shall with 
 wonder see that nothing was snatched away 
 from ^us but what would have hurled us, if 
 left in our possession. But blessed be God, in 
 the midst of affliction you abound in consola- 
 tion also. O happy troubles, fortunate trials, 
 blessed disappointments, that have turned all 
 your family to seek the Lord, here is the an- 
 swer of your many years prayers, the fruit of 
 your many supplications; surely the Lord 
 is with -you, and the jire doth 7wt^ shall not 
 kindle upon thee^ he will uphold you with the 
 right hand of his power, and you have seen, 
 and shall see his great salvation. 
 
 I have nothing agreeable to- write from this 
 wilderness, Religion seems on the decline ; 
 for my part I am absolutely left alone, I have 
 not ceased acting as a preacher, but the people 
 have lost the form and power of Godliness, 
 and though superstition and profanity abound 
 yet still I continue to preachy and some few 
 come to hear. Mr. Magery seems buried 
 alive in Carbonear, he married a planters 
 daughter, without her fluhers consent, gave 
 
( 249 ) 
 
 much offence, and his usefulness seemsto.be 
 at an end. Temporal things have been unpros- 
 perous with me this year; but I hope my 
 trust is not in the uncertain things that make 
 to themselves wings, and fly away, let you 
 and I stand still, and we shall see the salva- 
 tion of our God! O blessed expression, — ^yts, 
 Our God! 
 
 December Ith, I have just read over your 
 last letter ; I find it is through much tribula- 
 tion we must enter the kingdom of Heaven, 
 you are drinking the bitter cup, but the Lord 
 is holding your trembling hand and encour- 
 ageing you to follow him through sufferings 
 to glory : He has said (and can we doubt his 
 word) all things shall work together for good 
 to those that Love God : if so, tlie present dis- 
 pensation is for good, iov your good ; for sure- 
 ly you can say with truth, '* Lord thou know^ 
 est all things, thou knowest that / love thee^^. 
 I sometimes vainly wish that I was near you, 
 to share your troubles, and mingle mme v/ith 
 yours, but were I to tell all the exercises of 
 a public and private nature, that have agitated 
 my spirits these two or three years past, it 
 would require long time indeed, and I have 
 
( 250 ) 
 
 not time to write it: Mr. John M'Geary came 
 here as a preacher appointed by Mr. Wesley 
 he came seemingly in the spirit of the Gospel 
 full of love : He had natural lalents for the 
 work, and I gave him every help and encour- 
 agement in my poAver. 
 
 But Oh he laboured in vain, and left this 
 place for England last month; nor do I 
 know one professor or profane that wished 
 his stay :...he brought upon himself multi- 
 plied vexations, and a flood of reproach up- 
 on the cause ; I was constrained for the 
 cause sake, and for my own credit sake, to 
 keep at a distance from him for near a year' 
 past..., In these troublesome times, with 
 every possible discouragement, no friend or 
 brother to assist, and reproach pouring 
 down on the methodist name ; I say with 
 all this to discourage me, I began to build 
 a meeting house in Harbour- grace, and open- 
 ed it the last day of August this year : I 
 built it at my ow^n expense ; for we have 
 no society ; and this is the only thing at r 
 present that keeps up the protestant name in 
 this place : the protestant minister is worse 
 than none, and few go to church, while Po- 
 
( ^51 ) 
 
 pery like a deluge sweeps away the rest, ... 
 In the midst of this I have to labour for 
 the bread that perisheth, to suffer all the vex- 
 ations, disappointments and fatigue, of a bu- 
 siness the most precarious and perplexing 
 perhaps in the world. But through all, my 
 only comfort and support is this :...*' I am 
 not my own," I have already devoted my- 
 self, -dnd all I have to God ; to that God 
 who openeth his hand and supplies the wants 
 of an Universe :... this is the outlines, rather 
 the preface to all 1 could tell you, were you- 
 siting where I now write, but you are not' 
 here ! All we can do is to meet at the throne 
 of grace in this world ; by and by we shall 
 meet in a better, to tell the labours of our- 
 feet, and various toils through all this vale 
 of tears. 
 
 I have just wrote to the son of J. W. 
 of Waterford to come out and preach the 
 gospel here for one summer freely,... meet- 
 ing such discouragement makes me fear> 
 while I write on the subject.... Is the young 
 man fit for the work ? Has he gifts and 
 grace ? do not let him come to do hurt ; but 
 O encourage him if he is likely to do good : 
 
( 252 ) 
 
 may the next that comes be one that Christ 
 the Lord shall send. 
 
 The Lord be with vou, write me in the 
 spring, and pray for your Son and Brother 
 in the best of bonds. 
 
 JOHN STRETTON 
 
 LETTER CIV. 
 Mr. John Stretton...to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 Harhour.gr ace ^ December 18, 1790. 
 SHALL I again say, that I have sympa- 
 thized with my very Dear Friend, in all these 
 complicated troubles that have lately come 
 upon you; but you know the mountains are 
 high, and the vallies deep, the nearer the pil- 
 grim is to mount Zion the city of our God. 
 But as troubles abound, consolation also a- 
 bounds; and what great consolation, to sec all 
 your children with their faces Zion- ward ; is 
 net this a greater comfort, than to see them 
 rolling in gilded chariots to Hell ? know this , 
 that all things shall work together for good 
 to them that love God : have you not esteeiii' 
 cdjlif72^s your Chief Joy? cannot you still 
 say, '' Lord thou knowest all things, thou 
 
( 2o3 ) 
 
 knowest that I love thee'» and then conclude 
 that those exquisitely painful dispensations of 
 his providence, are the very best things that 
 could happen to you and yours : for ** Crosses 
 from his sovereign hand, are blessings in dis- 
 guise".-^! have felt your afflictions at many 
 hundred miles distance, and have wept, and 
 prayed for you.: O what a mercy to have Je^ 
 BUS, a Saviour,a Friend, that was made for ad- 
 versity, that sticketh closer than a brother ; to 
 fly to, in the hour of our distress : O leave 
 all to him, trust him solely: he has, he does 
 he will, turn all these seeming evils to you 
 and your childrens* everlasting good; then 
 shall you look back ** and wonder at his grace, 
 to all Eternity". I go on in a public way as 
 usual; since I opened the meeting house, many 
 attend on Sabbath evenings, but I cannot ob- 
 serve much good done; two or three w^ere 
 wrought upon last Winter, who seem still in 
 earnest; but the general hurt done by the 
 kist preacher from Europe will not be easily 
 recovered. 
 
 January 2, 1191, And is my Dear Sister 
 Bennis, now a resident in Waterford, where 
 I left her on a visit twenty years ago ! few and 
 Y 
 
( ^^54 ) 
 
 full of evil have, these days been with nie in 
 this dreary Region ; and yet here I have been 
 fed, and cloathed by miracle, and here also 
 the pillar of a cloud, was my guide, in this 
 wilderness. Has not the same blessed and glo- 
 rious guide, led you like old Jacob to sec 
 and bless all your children ? and to rejoice 
 in seeing Christ formed in the hearts of your 
 offspring, and grace given to your children's 
 children? surely your comforts are great, O 
 rejoice in them, rejoice in him who is the 
 Husband of the Widow, and who will never 
 leave or forsake you: I thought before this time 
 to be able to leave this land, but find myself 
 year after year in the same place; I toil and 
 toil for nothing ; then I think I am placed 
 here, if not for the defence of the gospel, at 
 least to be a witness against, and reprover 
 of the workers of iniquity; for O myfriend,this 
 place is like Sodom in ever}^ thing, but ful- 
 ness of bread, and I am here alone, not one 
 family heartily religious that I can associate 
 with, or hold any profitable converse with all 
 the dreary Winter. 
 
 Write to me next spring, and let me kno^v 
 all about you and yours, and O believe, yon 
 
( 255 ) 
 
 have a large share in the affection and prayers, 
 of your truly sympathetic Son, Brother, and 
 Friend. 
 
 JOHN STRETTON. 
 
 LETTER CV. 
 
 Mr. John Stretton...to Mrs Eliza Bennl's. 
 
 Harbourgrace^ November 29^ 1791. 
 Will it not rejoice my Dear Friend, to 
 hear that the Lord has been pleased to revive 
 his work in this place last August, in a most 
 remarkable manner^ through the instrumen- 
 tality of a Mr. William Black from Halifax in 
 Nova- Scotia : He is a ruleing Elder in the 
 Methodist Episcopal Church, came here on 
 a visit, spent about six weeks amongst us, 
 and then returned: while here many were 
 converted, chiefly young people, and since 
 his departure, I have gathered near sixty 
 young persons, and many litde children that 
 have serious impressions on their minds.... 
 This work was the most extraordinary I have 
 ever seen, and as remarkable if particularized 
 ^ as in parts of the continent of America, that 
 ^ I have read of: O this i« the day my soul has 
 longed for, blessed be God for it, I could al^ 
 
( 256 ) 
 
 most take up Simeons exclamation ! surely 
 he who has begun this great, this glorious 
 work in the dreary wilderness, will carry it 
 on, until this dark region is illuminated with 
 Gospel light, knowledge and love : Amen. 
 Yours Affectionately 
 JOHN STRETON- 
 
 LETTER CVI. 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis...tc 
 
 MY DEAR FRIEND. 
 
 I CANNOT express my thanks to you 
 for first beginning, and so kindly continuing 
 a correspondence from which I have derived 
 so much satisfaction, and expect yet more.... 
 Your last has proved a great blessing to me ; 
 how shall I sufficiently praise my God for lay- 
 ing me 50 close on your heart, may the Lord 
 reward you an hundred fold ; surely I cannot 
 cease to pray for you even as for my own soul, 
 and find it good to remember you before the 
 Lord. 
 
 Through the whole of your experience, 
 I see a very near resemblance to my own; 
 only I think there is something in my 
 
( 257 ) 
 
 very composition, that is harder for the grace 
 of God to work upon, than in any I meet with, 
 and (if I may use the expression) I think 
 he has had more trouble with me, than with 
 thousands ; but, blessed be his name, with 
 him all things arc possible, he has begun 
 the work^ and he will carry it on, and bring 
 forth the topstone with shouting and praise 
 to his own free grace : Let ua trust in him, 
 and we shall not be disappointed ; I am con- 
 vinced we lose much for want of this. The 
 Lord gives us according to our faith ; and 
 because our faith is weak, our conceptions are 
 narrow, and our hopes confined : so that we 
 cannot take in the measure of love and life 
 which the Lord is willing to give ; as to my- 
 self I know this is the case, yet,so inconsist- 
 ent am i diat I act contrary to niy know- 
 ledge; but thus flir I can testify for God» 
 Vvhen I did act f.uth upon him to the full, 
 and kept my faith in continual exercise I 
 was kept constantly happy: and enjoyed a con- 
 stant sense of his presence, and the con- 
 stant testimony of his spirit, that he had 
 cleansed my heart from sin. I also knew 
 it was his will I should keen this, and that 
 Y 2 
 
( 258 ; I 
 
 I need not have lost it, or have it at any time 
 withdrawn. But self ignorance, and self wis 
 dom, have caused me much sorrow, and 
 yet I have not learned wisdom by my folly ; 
 I am still as apt to hearken to the voice of 
 my enemy, and to dispute the matter on his 
 side as ever ; I want that childlike simpli- 
 city which I see so amiable in others, and 
 which I think more desirable than wis- 
 dom and great attainments : but how shall 
 I attain this ? my Dear friend, will you tell 
 me how ? there appears so many reasonable 
 objections against myself, and these so in- 
 consistent with my profession, that I am 
 ready to think it is only presumption in me 
 to keep my hold ? The constent sight Lhave 
 of myself keeps me almost continually in 
 this state of suspense, and sinks my spirit 
 down to the earth ; so that I have only a 
 melancholy remembrance of what I once 
 was, and look back with sorrow and shame 
 on the happy years that are past, when the 
 candle of the Lord did shine bright upon 
 my head, and when by his light I walked 
 tlirough darkness : O shall I ever see such 
 times again ? surely it would be just if the 
 
( 259 ) 
 
 Lord would never afford me such, because 
 like Eve I hearkened to the voice of the 
 tempter :...Vet while I endeavour to disco- 
 ver to you my own unfaithfulness, I should 
 also acknowledge the goodness and loving 
 kindness of God. At times he does give 
 me to see that my heart is wholly his, and 
 that sin is cast out ; and though I am sur- 
 rounded with many things which bring dis- 
 tress on my mind, yet I can say he makes 
 all work for good, to my soul: In all my 
 trials and distresses he is my refuge, and at 
 the worst of times, am enabled to come to 
 him as my father and my friend ; and ^ 
 far as I can see his will, do find my whole 
 soul acquiesce in it ; if I could certainly 
 think that even the abatement of my hap- 
 piness was his will, I think I should rejoice 
 to suffer it. You will be apt to ask, why 
 then do I complain ? I answer because I have 
 not that fervency of love to God which I 
 have had, nor that degree of sweet enjoyment, 
 that constant immediate access to him, that 
 near union, and intimate communion, that 
 stayedness of mind, and solidity of spirit, 
 that freedom of conversation with him, and 
 
( 260 } 1 
 
 emptiness of self before him;... I say I do 
 not enjoy any of these in that measure or de- 
 gree which I have done, and for this I grieve : 
 my complaints are all against myself, but ;how 
 easy for my Gorl to remove; a word, a touch, a 
 look can do; this would be pleasant, but if my 
 present state be more medicinal why should 
 I complain, my good physician sees what 
 medicines the disorders of my soul has need 
 of, and his skill cannot err t through grace t 
 find myself passive in his hands, and desire 
 that his whole will may be done in me, and 
 by me.. ..I am my Dear friend, ypur^ AJil- 
 ^erely /\flectionatc Sister^ . , , . | r,^. ..../ . 
 
 LETTER CVII. 
 
 The Revd. J. F to Mrs. Eliza B^nnis. 
 
 Covey April 7, irss. 
 
 DEAR MADAM. 
 
 YOU will be pleased to hear, we are 
 happy and content, and I trust (with divine 
 assistance) we shall never have reason to re- 
 pine ^t our .situation.... When we consider 
 the different pursuits of the world in search of 
 
( 261 ) 
 
 what is generally called happiness, and sec 
 with what zeal and assiduity that phantom is 
 sought after, while the more substantial bliss 
 is passed by unregarded, and at the same 
 time reflect how easy k is in the power of al- 
 inost every one to obtain it, what name shall 
 we give Ambition? — ** Fine reasoning (you 
 will say) you are but a Curate, get but posses- 
 sion of a good living, taste the sweets of rich- 
 es, let tythes increase and all these fine senti- 
 ments will be done away.*' I cannot answer 
 for myself 'tis true, if providence is pleased 
 to protect us, as he has hitherto, I trust hap- 
 piness will never be a stranger to our dwelling. 
 In any station believe me to be Dear Madam t 
 Your Affectionate &c. J. Fo 
 
 LETTER CVIII. 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis....to the Revd. J. F. 
 
 Litnericky April 19, 1783. 
 
 DEAR SIR. 
 
 I AM not versed in compliments, but do 
 
 •assure you, we all share in your happiness 
 
 and sincerely wish and hope it may continue 
 
 and increase for ever,...Thtit there is such a 
 
 thing as happiness, we all allow, but what it 
 
C 252 ) 
 
 is, and where to be found, is tlie question : 
 the pursuits after it are as various, as the tem~ 
 pers and dispositions of the world, each hav^ 
 ing some different end in view w^hich they call 
 happiness, and which when attained gratifies 
 for a time, and is often the foundation or 
 scource of much unhappiness : the mind dis- 
 appointed in its search, roves after other ob- 
 jects, which it calls by the same name ; and 
 like Solomon, pursues it in every gratifica 
 tion, seeks it in the worlds in the creature, in 
 the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eye, 
 and the pride of life : and happy for these if 
 In all they are disappointed, for then and only 
 then, they may be drove to seek it where only 
 it may be found, for in this I fully agree with 
 the Poet : 
 
 *' Search the whole Creation round, 
 *' Can it out of God be found ?'* 
 
 This is my opinion concerning happiness. 
 God as the fountain, the sourse of it, has re- 
 served it all in himself; nor can there be any 
 complete happiness in any other, but whoever 
 seeks it in him, shall most certainly find sure, 
 solid, substantial happiness, such as the care- 
 less world knows nothinr*: of, and such as the 
 
( 263 ) 
 
 world, or the creature, a curac}^ or a good 
 living cannot bestow : such as a beggar may 
 enjoy, but a Monarch cannot purchase. Does 
 my Dear friend agree with me ia this ? then 
 the question naturally follows, how is this hap- 
 piness to be attained? the answering this is 
 jy(?«;- province.... My mind has ever been in- 
 quisitive on this important subject, and hope at 
 a leisure hour, for your kind assistance : may 
 the Lard illuminate you Vv^ith his grace, and 
 V, hilst our ijuarches are agreeable to his will, 
 this exercise may be profitable to us both.,.. 
 ^ .i;n ' our sincere fiiend 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LKITER CiX. 
 
 'ih<^. Rev. J. F....to Mrs. EUza Bennis. 
 Coi}e, May 12, 1783. 
 
 THANKS to my Dear Mrs. Bennis, 
 
 for your friendly arid improving letter, the \ 
 
 assurance she gives of our friends partial 
 
 regards, will ever afford me sincere plea 
 
 i re,... How exactly have you drawn the pro- 
 
 :3S of i that imaginary happiness which 
 
 en generally pursue so earnestly, and which 
 
 , ,ur frieixd (though not a long time in the 
 
( 264 ) 
 
 world) has often found remorse to attend the 
 acquisition of.... You ask me how real happi- 
 ness is to be attained ? though I imagine 
 you have already formed a just opinion upon 
 this subject, since you desire it, I will of- 
 fer mine. We both agree that the world 
 or any of its highest enjoyments can never 
 purchase this desirable blessing, we must 
 therefore apply to another source :... where 
 the pleasures that are offered to our accept- 
 ance, natural reason alone informs us are 
 capable of satisfying the most unbounded 
 desires ; with this delightful addition, that 
 they never can leave behind the least uneasy 
 sensation. 
 
 How to acquire this happiness is the point : 
 external objects, and present giatification, 
 continually surround us, and solicit our accep- 
 tance ; to oppose these, let us in the first place 
 remember the end, that (with Almighty as- 
 sistance) w€ may not do amiss j wheii we 
 keep this rule steadily in view, it will in 
 time weaken those attacks, which the ene- 
 my to our peace is continually making upqn 
 us, to prevent our improving in virtue : apd 
 upon our proper application we may reason- 
 
. ^65 j 
 
 ably expect that assistance from tibove which 
 will carry us through our Christian warfare ; 
 and open to our view those delightful pros- 
 pects, of which if on an impartial reflec-^ 
 tion upon our conduct ; our consciences do 
 not condemn us ; we may with confidence 
 (through the mercies of th e Almighty) ex- 
 pect a happy enjoyment. I am, my Dear 
 Madam, your truly Affectionate 
 
 J. F 
 
 LETTER ex. 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis...to the Rev. J. F. 
 Limerick, Jf/^^y 26, 1783, 
 
 THE subject which my Dear Mr. F, 
 has taken in hand, and engaged me in, 
 is very copious; one which has already 
 filled volumes, and employed the pens of 
 the most learned and the most holy for ma- 
 ny ages past; how unequal am I then to 
 such a task! but as it is only for the inspec- 
 tibn of my Friend, I am content to expose 
 my ignorance ; requesting that as a friend 
 you would set me right where you think I 
 may be wrong. ;^ '* 
 
 We both agree, that solid substantial hap - 
 Z 
 
- ■ ■ - ■ --mm 
 
 ( 266 ) ' 
 
 piness cannot be found in the enjoyment of 
 any, or every temporal good : God as the : 
 fountain and centre has reserved it all iri 
 himself; therefore I suppose th^ttrue jbappi?jess 
 consists u holy in union ard communion with 
 bi77i Is a hidden life, a spiritual blessirg, such 
 as the world cannot see (except by the fruits) 
 but is wholly transacted between God ami 
 
 the soul ; and is that kingdom of heaven 
 which die Lord says is within; or as the 
 Church service expresses it, '* A peace 
 which passeth all understanding;'* or as St.; 
 Paul expresses it, "A kingdom which cannot 
 be moved," consisting of righteousness and 
 peace and joy in the Holy Ghost, proceed- 
 ing from a sense Of the favour and approbar 
 tion of God : this alone, I suppose to be 
 true, real Happiness ; sufficient to sweeteor 
 every bitter in life, and make the possessor 
 happy in the midst of triah and afflictions ; 
 but as this is wholly spiritual, and we by na- 
 ture wholly carnal i I do not think that na-. 
 tural reason alone can either direct our choice, 
 or enable us to gain this great end : tnan by 
 nature is dark and blind, as to spiritual 
 things, and not capable of understanding 
 
( 267 ) 
 
 ihcm, until enlightened by the spirit of God; 
 indeed St. Paul tells us, the natural man 
 cannot know these things (but why may he 
 not) the answer is plain ; "because they are 
 spiritually discerned." 1 Cor. 2 & 14. If 
 this be the case, how shall our blindness 
 find out the right path ] how shall we be 
 able to attain this desirable state ? is it by 
 endeavours of our own, by mortifying our- 
 selves, by calling our reason to our aid? 
 Alas my friend, this philosophical experi- 
 .iiient will never do ; our blessed Lord says, 
 ** I am the way, the truth, and the life," 
 let us then in secret hunible prayer, bCw 
 down before him and say, '' Lord what I 
 know not, do thou teach me;'\..our bless- 
 ed saviour knowing the ignorance of the hu- 
 man heart, promised his Disciples to send 
 them the Holy Ghost, the comforter; to 
 teach them all these things, and to remain 
 with them, as his gift to his church, to the 
 end of the world; not to the Apostles only, 
 for St. Peter informs us, that '- the promise 
 was to them, and to their chiklren,. and to 
 all that arc afar off", even as many as the ' 
 Lord our God^shall call." Acts 2 & 39. Bless^ 
 
( 268 ) 
 
 cd be God for the extent of this blessed prom- 
 ise i then it is free for me^ for my friend, foi 
 all; surely then it is the will of our God that 
 we should be happy ; let us not refuse our 
 own mercies, or delay our happiness, by 
 trying to overcome our corruptions by little 
 and little ; be assured my Dear friend there 
 is a shorter way, a more speedy rem- 
 edy ; the Lord is able and willing to destroy 
 them all at a stroke ; a zvord, a foucbf a looky 
 will do, when the soul is ivi/ll/ig. to be made 
 whole in God^s o«n v.cy : O may we be 
 made willing in this day of his power, to re- 
 ceive, all his goodness waits to give:... My 
 thoughts and pen have run greater lengths 
 than I at first intended, but hope your friend- 
 ly hand will set mc right, wliere you may 
 differ from me ; I have given my thoughts free- 
 ly, and expect and wish you to do the same, 
 it is an interesting subject to us both, let 
 all shyness be done away : I love the opin- 
 ion, the advice, the reproofs of a friend. 
 May the Lord grant us that wisdom which 
 cometh from above, that we may act, and 
 speak, and think in all things agreeable to 
 his Holy and Blessed will. I am &c. 
 
 ELIZA BENNJS 
 
( 269 j 
 
 LETTER CXT- 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis..,.to Majar 
 
 Limerick^ Februarij 5, •- 
 
 MY DEAR rraEND ■ ; 
 
 LOVE to your sotil obliges me to un- 
 dertake a task which even you perhaps, may 
 be tempted . to think officious and needless ; 
 ,j^ut |fkiip>i^ top well the devices of Satan, and 
 ihe many dangers a soul is surrounded with, 
 w4ien desirous to flee from the wrath to conie, 
 not to have a thousand fears for you ; consid- 
 er you are yet in the Devil's territories, who 
 our Lord teils us is the God of this world: 
 that you have not only flesh and blood to whsb- 
 tie with, but as the Apostle tells us. Prioci-^ 
 palities and powers, and the rulers of the dark- 
 ness . of this world, and spiritual wickeiiiiess 
 in high places : If you have proposed to 
 yourself an easy aud quiet way of going to 
 Heaven, you are much. niirsta}cen:,rj?/w^/?2^er, 
 the way to the Crown y is by th^ way of the 
 Cross y pur Lord trod it before us, and mark- 
 ed it out for us to follow him; and though 
 we are not called tg die as he did, yet we are 
 
 Z 2 
 
certainly caUed to take up our cross whatever 
 it be: to deny ourselves, to mortify the flesh 
 with % affections and lusts, to keep a strict 
 watch over every motion of our hearts, and to 
 see that these do tend God- ward continually. 
 The Lord has done great things for you in a 
 short time, be thankful, and never forget such 
 mercy. Let your soul lie humble at the feet 
 of Christ continually, renouncing your own 
 wisdom, and submit yourself to the teachings 
 of his spirit ; do not imagine that you are now 
 able to stand alone, that you are strong enough; 
 and happy enough, and that now you will 
 keep the matter wholly between God and 
 yourself, having no need of any outward help; 
 1 say at your peril be^vare of this grand delu- 
 sion,, which has been the destruction of many 
 souls, the strongest christians find they can* 
 not stand alone, and do still learn from, and 
 are helped by the very weakest; so that the 
 Head cannot say to the Foot, '' 1 have no^ 
 need of thee"... Remember the helps that God 
 provided for you, wiien your soul was in dis- 
 tress ; remember how these were blessed to 
 you, and think what would be your case if; 
 
( 2ri ) 
 
 you had not happened into such hands, your 
 might perhaps be still ^vadcing in the debths 
 of distress: but the Lord had mercy on you; 
 and still he has provided these helps for you 
 almost every where ^ I charge you therefore 
 at the peril of your soul that you associate 
 with these wheresoever they can be met with 
 in your travels, and that you be diligent in 
 bearing the word of God wherever you can: 
 remember these are means of improvement 
 which God has put into your hands, and has 
 promised that where two or three are met in 
 his name there he will be in the midst: then 
 let not my friend be absent ; where the Lord 
 and his people are, there be:; as you value 
 your souls happiness, and remember that 
 every omission of duty is a commission of sin: 
 where these helps are not to be had, the Lord 
 will support you without them; but let it be 
 impressed on your recollection, that I now 
 tell you before hand, when you can have them, 
 Ht vjill not suppon-jou without them... The 
 Lord has given you a talent to improve y not 
 to bury in the earth ; beware of the fate of 
 the slothful servant : be determined to be as 
 holy and happy as God would have you be, 
 and never be ashamed of your Religiona 
 
( 272 ) 
 
 Be zealous for God, and he will support 
 )'0u, but do not think to blend the esteem of 
 men' widi the favour of God... Give yourself 
 up without resene to the Lord, and be content 
 to be accounted any thing for Christ's sake; 
 you must be first tried' before you are approv- 
 ed, but remember, " w^^^i"^ ^ man's ways 
 please the Lord, he maketh even his enemies 
 to be at peace with him'\.and the sincere soul 
 who i^ives itself up wholly to be the Lord's 
 without making an)^ conditions with God, is 
 best provided for.... Be much ifi prayer, read- 
 ing the Scriptures, and self-examination : ask 
 yourself often that question which our Lord 
 asked his disciples, ('* doye now believe".) 
 Ask your own heart '' do I tio^iv believe". En- 
 deavour to keep this jewel of assurance al- 
 ways bright, and if at any time it happens to 
 be clouded, prgy it clear again; and open 
 your heart always to some Christian friend, 
 who may give you counsel, and pray with you 
 and for you.. ..DC punctual to the horui* of ele- 
 ven o'clock (in the fore-noon)^ couiit^t^y bur 
 privilege to meet theit-in secret, wrth^ybur 
 friends before the thVoneof ^ace-; alftd4et'x)ur 
 joint petitions go up" as incense' before 'tlie 
 
( 273 ) 
 
 Lord : at this hour we retire to pray earnest- 
 ly for each other, for our families, for the 
 children of God every where, and for the 
 world in general, and be thankful to God even 
 for these little few :... among them you may 
 experience the communion of Saints, and be 
 assured they will bear you upon their hearts 
 continually : I say, be punctual to this houry 
 and be thankful for it : I would also propose 
 another thing to you, which is this; you are 
 much indebted to the Lord for his gracious 
 dealings towards you, 1 would then advise 
 you to set apart a day of fasting and prayer, 
 wherein you should humble yourself before 
 God, as a lost undone sinner, saved by meer 
 unmerited grace and favour;...! think next 
 Friday would be a proper day for this, as you 
 will by then be settled in your new quarters, 
 and I also am determined to fast and pray 
 with you on that day, and will engage a few 
 more to bear us company on your behalf : and 
 if you will not bear us company ,; we will fast 
 and pray for you, but I hope you will make 
 one among us, and in so doing make a so- 
 lemn surrender of yourself to be the Lord's :.. 
 remember that text, *^ the just shalllive by 
 
( 274 ) 
 
 faith, but if any man draw back, my soui 
 shall have no pleasure in him, sa'ith the 
 
 Lord'\ 
 
 I hope by this time my friend does not 
 think I have said too much, if so let my first 
 apology plead for me, indeed it is love, for 
 your soul which obliges me to it, as having 
 myself found mercy of the Lord, and know- 
 ing the human heart, and the subtilty of the 
 enemy of souls :...you have promised to write 
 to me, which promise I insist on, but re- 
 member I do not want a complimentary epis- 
 tle, but a minute account of your state, and 
 the dealings of God with you, and after you 
 have perused this letter often, I request you 
 may frankly and freely write your thoughts 
 on what 1 have said, and your objections (if 
 any you have) without the least reserve : and 
 if you chose to receive another from me, let 
 me know how to direct;. ...It is my souls de- 
 sire that you may stand fast in the liberty 
 wherein Christ hath made you free, that you 
 may never again be entangled by the bondage 
 of sin :,..and I tell you, you need never be less 
 happy than you now are.... But you may be 
 much more so, if vou will but follow the di- 
 
^ 275 ) 
 
 rections x^lready given : ifyoii will not, be' it. 
 ut your peril :...! have delivered my own soul 
 be assured that I shall pray for you, and hope 
 if you love my soul, that you also will pray 
 forme; and now may the Lord Jesus who 
 hath purchased you with his blood, and is 
 also able to keep you by his Almighty and 
 powtrful grace keep, sustain, uphold and 
 preserve you, and bring you at last to his 
 everlasting kingdom and glory; is the earnest, 
 prayer of your. . . AiTectionate, 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER CXII. 
 Mrs Eliza Benn is... to Mr. 
 
 Limerick^ December 3. ^ 
 
 Sir. 
 
 IT may appear strange to you, to re- 
 ceive a letter from a person with whom you 
 have had but a few hours acquaintance, but 
 be assured it comes from a friendly hand,^ 
 with (shall I say) my last efforts for the sal- 
 vation of your soul,;. ..when I consider every 
 little circumstance attending our. seem- 
 ingly accidental meeting, I am rather led 
 
( 276 , 
 
 to think it entirely providentiai ; the Lord 
 who can, and frequently docs, use base and 
 foolish instruments, after having tried ma- 
 ny great and powerful ones with you at last 
 threw you into my hands;... the knowledge 
 I then received of your state, and the open- 
 ness and freedom with which you declared 
 it, has made me some way interested in 
 your souls welfare ; and have often since 
 found my heart much affected, and enabled 
 to plead with God for you, and still (though 
 painfully disappointed in your breach of pro- 
 mise) I cannot give you up ; the thoughts 
 of your being eternally damned pierces my 
 very soul. O why, why will you resolve 
 to perish? Alas, how miserably are 5^ou 
 deceived you have left the childrens' bread 
 to feed with swine on husks ! and are you 
 satisfyed? I know you are not, nor never 
 shall, until you return to the Lord : you are 
 one of those he complains of, for commit- 
 ing two evils; you have left the fountain of 
 living waters, and have hewn out to yourself 
 broken cisterns, that can hold no water:... 
 And 5^et 3'our disappointments have not 
 brought you back ; you persist in your re- 
 
( 277 ) 
 
 bellion as though you were resolved to see 
 it out with God. You are not happy (I 
 know you are not,) your most social plea- 
 sures are embittered with keen remorse, your 
 sweetest enjoyments are disturbed with pain- 
 ful reflections and your conscience tells you ^ 
 the curse of God is in your basket and in 
 your store, and pursues you as a rebel where- 
 ever you turn, and shall certainly continue 
 to do so, until you return to God : What 
 is it you have bartered your soul for ? have 
 you got what you expected ? has not the 
 Devil deceived you with false appearances ? 
 and yet you have not returned ! O ^vhat 
 proficiency might you have made in the 
 ways of God had you continued to be faith- 
 ful to his grace ; how would his love sweet- 
 en every enjoyment, lighten eveiy burden, 
 and make even difficulties easy. But look 
 up, it is not yet too late, the Lord is noiJi} 
 willing to receive you ; take the prodigals 
 resolution, now arise and go to your Father, 
 venture on his mercy, O for the Lord's 
 sake delay not : come now resolve this mo- 
 ment^ he waits to receive you with arms of love 
 and will not upbraid you for all that is past ! 
 A a 
 
( 278 ) 
 
 O let there be joy in heaven over you, let 
 the Lord himself rejoice over the lost sheep, 
 over the purchase of his own blood : does 
 your heart answer ** Amen ?" Are yoti now 
 determined to venture your all on Christ 
 without looking back, or desiring to feed 
 again on the dregs of your sins ? then be 
 encouraged, the Lord will help you, only 
 be determined : cut oiFthe right hand, pluck 
 out the right eye, give yourself with- 
 out reserve to be the Lord's, and be deter- 
 mined if you perish, it shall be at his feet ; 
 but what shall I say if you are yet undeter- 
 mined, halting between two opinions ; sen- 
 sible of your misery, yet unwilling to part 
 it : feeling your chains, yet loving and em- 
 bracing them ; if this be the case be assu- 
 red God will enter into judgment with you 
 for so many slights of his offered mercy : 
 and how will you be able to appear ? how 
 answer him to one of a thousand : how 
 will you answer the solemn promise you 
 made me, the thirteenth of last September ! 
 when the Lord touched your heart, gave 
 you a feeling sense of your state, and some 
 earnest desires to return: I say remember 
 
( 279 } 
 
 litie promise you then made me in the pre- 
 saice of Gody that you would leave your 
 bins, would give yourself to pra}'er, and as 
 soon as you should go back to Cork would 
 unite again with the children of God to seek 
 the salvation of your soul : I demand the 
 performance ; the Lord was present, and 
 heard, Q.nd dcma?ids it; and will in the day 
 of Judgment before Angels, men and devils 
 require it at your bands : and shall X be obli- 
 ged to witness against you ? indeed the 
 thought pams my heart, I. would rather re- 
 joice over you.... I cannot give you up and 
 shall not cease to offer up my poor weak 
 petitions for you whilst there appears any 
 hopes of you: but if you are proof against 
 all that God has done, and is still willing to 
 do, your damnation be upon your own 
 head: I call Heaven and Earth to record 
 against you this day, that I have delivered 
 my ow^n soul, and am clear of your blood. 
 Do not think that I have said too muchj 
 your own conscience shall witness for me 
 to the truth of all; therefore receive it in 
 love, and let it have its desired effect ;./>per- 
 ^laps it mav be the last admonition the Lord 
 
( 280 ) 
 
 may see fit to grant you, pray over it, weep 
 over it, and be thankful to God for it. And 
 if your heart be not so far hardened as to 
 take offence at what 1 have said, I entreat 
 a few lines from you by post, as scon as 
 convenient....! am uith sincere desires for 
 your souls welfare 
 
 Your Assured Friend. 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 LETTER CXIII. 
 
 Mr. John McGregor lo Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 Limericky September 1, 1790. 
 
 FRIEND OF MY HEART, 
 
 I AM in possession of a detail of your 
 sufferings, since you left this City... Your way 
 for many years has been strewed with thorns; 
 this is a part of your father's legacy to his 
 dearest children : if we be without affliction, 
 then are we bastards and not sons... David was 
 scourged in his Absalom, Eli in his two sons, 
 and my Dear Sister Bennis in her E :....But 
 my Dear Friend, there is much more for, 
 than against you, the mercies of God tq you 
 are far more abundant than your trials, a troop 
 
( 281 ) 
 
 has prevailed against Dan ; but the promise 
 is, that Dan shall prevail at last, this is com- 
 fortable to the believing soul; when your 
 heart is overwhelmed with trouble, put your 
 trust in the Lord, and stay yourself on your 
 God. 
 
 You have a gracious God to comfort you 
 his ear is open to your prayers, and he will 
 give you the desire of your heart.... You 
 have had tlie comfort, the great comfgrt of 
 seeing your Husband die in the Lord, that 
 tender and affectionate partner of forty-three 
 years ; for w^iose eternal happiness you sent 
 up many prayers, you have lived to see these 
 prayers fully answered : O may my latter end 
 be like his, you are now blessed with dutiful 
 and affectionate children, and grand children 
 with their faces Zion-ward^ determined with 
 Joshua to serve the Lord.... and anxious to 
 ^administer to your comfort ; take lawful plea- 
 sure in them, and be co-workers together ia 
 iove, and the God of love and peace shall be 
 with you. You love plain dealing, you know 
 me, and I know you; let not tvvo brands in 
 mercy plucked out of the burning, leap into 
 the fire again, whose fatal efiects v/e feel to thi^ 
 A a 2 
 
( 282 ) 
 
 day, say resolutely from your heart, '^ return 
 to thy rest O my soul, for the Lord hath dealt 
 bountifully with thee, in all thy troubles'% 
 then mercy and peace shall follow thee all thy 
 days, and thou shalt dwell in the house of the 
 Lord forever. 
 
 Now let me say something concerning my 
 
 own experience ; and O may the spirit of 
 
 truth guide my heart and pen.... The day you 
 
 left Limerick, (to reside in Waterford) I may 
 
 say as Elisha said to Gehazi, " went not mine 
 
 heart with thee", yes my selfish heart, I 
 
 cried outt whose parlour can I now turn into 
 
 a study? what woman will throw away her 
 
 work, to meditate and converse with me on 
 
 the things of God, and consult together to 
 
 make our calling and election sure ? who will 
 
 now counsel, instruct, or admonish me ? and 
 
 spur me on to run steadily my course to the 
 
 end ; who will thrust me into the jail, among 
 
 the malefactors ? to the barracks, amongst the 
 
 soldiers ? to sick beds, and distressed souls ? 
 
 this have you often done, when I \vas able, 
 
 but not always willing.. liave I not rightly sti- 
 
 led you my golden spur, lliat often brought 
 
 (as it were) blood, but never left a festered 
 
( 283 ) 
 
 wound behind. ... I see the instability of human 
 comforts, I may say with the Prophet, " he 
 has removed my lovers into a corner, that he 
 himself might be my lover, councellor, com- 
 forter and friend," my all in all.... Blessed be 
 his holy name, I find him precious to my soul 
 his holy word is precious, my select friends 
 are precious, my class and band are precious, 
 the preachers being primitive are precious 
 and the soul of my dear friend is ^oery pre- 
 cious ; and God is witness the spiritual and 
 temporal welfare of your offspring is near my 
 heart.... Now consider, you have been taking 
 care of other peoples vine -yards above forty- 
 years, (and so have I in a measure), is it not 
 full time now, that we should seriously look 
 to our own ; to beseech the heavenly dresser 
 to give us grace and power to pluck up the 
 thorns and thistles from the root, to gather the 
 stones ; and earnestly pray the divine com- 
 forter thoroughly to purge our hearts, and 
 sow the seeds of holiness to the Lord in 
 them ; without which no man can see his 
 face with joy : my sincere love to the Water- 
 ford preachers and people, remind them that 
 this is a year j of release and thanksgiving for 
 
C 28-4 ) 
 
 their passage out of trouble let us meet each 
 other in spirit for the prosperity of the Gospel. 
 
 My affectionate love to all your children, 
 while I live 1 shall not forget you or them at 
 the throne of grace :...! am old and feeble, 
 last week measured my seventy -sixth year ; 
 O Lord be merciful to me a sinner ; the so- 
 ciety here prospers, the select liand meets re- 
 gular, but I can seldom be with them ; I 
 generally meet my class in my bed-chamber, 
 often in my bed ; blessed be God for the love 
 that subsists among us, they will not let me 
 give them up until I am removed by my 
 Heavenly Father, which I expect will not be 
 long, O may 1 then be ready to give up my 
 charge with joy, ...to cease at once to work 
 and. live :...and as I never expect to see 
 you in this dying world, O let us meet in the 
 house not made with hands, to part no more 
 forever...." There shall we sit and sing and 
 tell, the wonders oflmmanuaP'. 
 
 Farewell my Dear old fellow traveller, my 
 friend, my Sister, farewell : 
 
 JOHN MCGREGOR. 
 
( 285 ) 
 
 LETTER CXIV. 
 
 Mr. Richard Concly...,to Mrs. Eliza Bennis, 
 
 Limerick March 27, 1790. 
 THE distress of my Dear Friend is such 
 that the bare account of it wrung my poor 
 soul, how much more poignant must the an- 
 guish of my friend be ? you have acted with 
 christian fortitude, patience is invincible, and 
 triumphs against all attacks... The rains de- 
 scended whilst you were yet in Limerick ; 
 when you were leaving it, the floods came, 
 but now in Waterford the winds blow and 
 beat against that house, and it falls not, for it 
 is founded on a rock ! when the enemy sees 
 that you can suffer, then he will cease to har- 
 rass you.... When he despairs of exciting 
 murmering, or impatience, then he will lay 
 aside his weapons.... The sight of God, that 
 you are still flivoured with in your greatest 
 afflictions, will powerfully help you to bear, 
 and especially whilst you see that this bitter 
 potion is sent to procure eternal health, that 
 suffering is the only way to glory, and that 
 light and momentary pains shall, be succeed, 
 ed by infinite pleasure and eternal happiness. 
 
( 26G ) 
 
 i^ we truly love, and are really pleased and 
 satisfied with the will of God, v. e cannot be of- 
 fended with the instruments God makes use 
 of to execute his will. ...That which happens 
 to us from moment to moment, is the will of 
 God concerninj^ us..., This is so universally 
 true that excepting our own sins, that which 
 comes upon us from the sins of others, is the 
 manifest will of God concerning us.... It was 
 in view of this truth, that our blessed Lord 
 called his sacred passion, which was procured 
 by the wickedest of men, " a cup which his 
 Father had given him to drink ''.... And that 
 David ventured to say that, the Lord had bid 
 Shimei to curse him. 
 
 I am commanded from Heaven to say to 
 the righteous, ** // shall be well with them*'''* 
 I have been tossed with you on a boisterous 
 ocean, and with you, I lock to rest in due 
 time, in a quiet Haven, there to lie at an- 
 chor in the bosom of God.... There remain- 
 eth a rest to the people of God, rest ! O how 
 sw-eet is rest to the solicitous mariner, and 
 how welcome is the harbour to him, espe- 
 cially after having been long beaten with 
 storms and tempests ! and how sweet nill 
 
( 2sr ) 
 
 rest be to the poor tempted, troubled, labour- 
 ing, travelling christian ; whose whole life 
 has been little else but trouble, labour and 
 sore travail ; who could scarce find all his 
 days a resting place for the sole of his foot 
 the world as to him being covered with a 
 deluge.... Death whenever it comes will turn 
 our conflicts into victory; this Aceldama 
 (this field of blood) into a mount of triumph, 
 and a throne of glory..,, We have now to 
 condict with corruptions and temptations, 
 with afflictions and Devils ; but yet a little 
 while, and the palm shall be put into our 
 hand: we shall triumphantly cry. Victory, 
 Victory, forever! O how sweet is victory 
 to a soldier that has been long and hard put 
 to it in battle... Let us hold out, and the vic- 
 tory will assuredly be ours: believe me your 
 Affectionate &c. 
 
 RICHARD CONDY. 
 
 LETTER CXV. 
 Mr. Richard Condy...to Mrs. Eliza Bennis* 
 
 Limerick, June 11, 1790. 
 My very Dear Friend. 
 
 YOU have borne the pelting of many 
 a pitiless storm: let not your wonted resig- 
 
( 288 ) 
 
 nation and patience slip from you. By how 
 much the more reiterated our afflictions are, 
 so much the more difficult is it to retain and 
 exercise the weapons of our warfare.... The 
 continual drop will fret marble :,..but still 
 be it remembered, that as the gospel hath allot- 
 ed us many tribulations, so it hath furnish- 
 ed us with many supports.... A mighty God ! 
 who is the rock of ages. A merciful High- 
 Priest ! who having been tempted himself 
 knows how to succour those that are tempt- 
 ed. Gracious experiences ; this last support 
 Experience, hath all the rest in it. A pa- 
 tient experienced Christian hath proved all 
 things; ^\hat they are, and the w^orst they 
 can do. He hath proved the world, and 
 sees the fashion of it passing away ; he sees 
 all passing, he sees the blackest clouds, 
 as flying clouds: He looks at the clear be- 
 yond the clouds. Open the eye of thy faith 
 thou Soldier of Jesus and say, ** Babylon 
 is fallen! is fallen!" not only it shall fall, but 
 it is already fallen. When the enemy hath 
 gotten the greatest advantage of you, of the 
 sun, of the wind, of the ground; when he 
 presseth with most violence, ^vith most fury 
 
( 289 ) 
 
 upon you, let your believing soul take 
 sanctuary here../* When my flesh and my 
 heart faileth, God is the st rength of my hearty 
 SLud my portion forever.^^ I love you the more, 
 by how much the more your sufferings in- 
 crease- and how much more Hi??! whose 
 marks these are. ** The sufferings of this 
 life are not worthy to be compared with 
 th e glory that shall be revealed,"^ let this 
 comfort you :... fare well my Dear Sister, you 
 have a large share in the prayers and affec- 
 tion, of your sincere friend and Brother. 
 RICHARD CONDV. 
 
 LETTER CXVl. 
 Mr. Walter Griffith.. .to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 Dublin, February 9, 1792. 
 
 MY DEAR SISTER BENNIS. 
 
 YOUR Fadier and God seems to have 
 chosen you and yours in the furnace of af- 
 fliction. You have been, you are still hon- 
 oured by being called to sufier; ** To you 
 it is given in behalf of Christ, not only to 
 believe but to suffer for his sake." But be 
 not discouraged vou now drink a mixed 
 B b 
 
( 290 ) 
 
 dip, you shall hereafter drink it unmixed ; 
 and the greater quantity of bitter in your 
 cup now, the larger will the cup of unmix- 
 ed bliss, which God v. ill put into your hand, 
 hereafter be. ** Our present light affliction, 
 which is but for a moment^ worketh out for 
 us 2(far more exceeding and eternal "weight 
 of giory !*' what an amazing disproportion 
 between the sufferings and the glory ? the 
 sufferings ** light" the giory ' * a far more 
 exceeding weight. "^^ The sufferings momen- 
 tary, the exceeding weight of glory "-Eter- 
 nal,''^ May you and yours have such views 
 of that glory, as to be enabled to say... 
 
 •' Ihankful I take the cup from thee, 
 " Prepared and mingled by thy skill." 
 
 I have sometimes thought, that we are in 
 danger of building our opinion of our present 
 state, and our hope of future glor)^ on the 
 measure of religious joy VvC feel, rather than 
 on our conformity to the image of God, or 
 cur earnestness in pursuing it. I grant that 
 ^vhere conformity to the image is, there isjv.y' 
 also ; but we may have that conformity, and 
 not the degree of joy we wish for. When 
 you tell me ^' I think my heart is sincere and 
 
( 291 ) 
 
 honest before him" and 'Mie enabled me to 
 renew my covenant in the sincerity of my 
 heart without one negative in my whole souP' 
 and ^' upon the strictest scrutiny into myself 
 I do not find my. lieart cleave to any thing 
 here belov/, ordtrsirous to indulge any sin, I 
 feel my will wholly given up to my God, and 
 desirous that his will may be done in me*' I 
 cannot entertain the smallest doubt of your 
 title to, and meetness for glory... »Yqu ask 
 then *' why have I not the comforts or sweet 
 consolations which I have had in times past''? 
 I answer, you are not entirely without joy, 
 though perhaps you have not that measure of 
 it you once had. Besides, you were once 
 without those deep distresses and heavy afflic- 
 tions, with which you have been exercised 
 for some time back ; and having outward and 
 inward peace, it is not to be wondered at, that 
 your joy has been greater than when ^\'ading 
 thro* deep waters: Upon the whole, I think you 
 have much cause of thankfulness to God, for 
 bearing you so long abov^ the water floods ;. 
 you have endured many storms, nor are you 
 beyond their re^ch yet; you have a body 
 '' dead because of sin", subject to death, fil- 
 
( 292 ) 
 
 led with the seeds of it, and rapidly tending to « 
 it.... Be thankful to God for having kept you 
 so long from sinking beneath the weight of 
 various afflictions ; and fear not but he will 
 still deliver you. 
 
 That God may ever satisfy you and yours 
 Avith the fullness of his divine presence, is the 
 earnest wish and ardent prayer of your truly 
 AiTectionate Brother : 
 
 WALTER GRIFFITH. 
 
 LETTER CXVn. 
 
 Mr, Joseph 6'r....to Mrs. Eliza Bennis. 
 
 The following letter from a well meaning 
 Papist, is inserted merely to introduce the 
 answer. 
 
 Carrick, No'vember 23, 1791. 
 
 BEAR JIADAItf, 
 
 I Make no doubt you will be a good deal 
 surprised (perhaps offended) at the liberty I 
 I now take. But when I assure you my motive 
 proceeds solely from the sincere good washes 
 I entertain for you, and your worthy family; 
 Avhose present and future happiness, it would 
 give me the greatest pleasure to promote, (even 
 in a small degree,) this being admitted, you 
 
( 290 ) 
 
 w ill I hope the more readily excuse my free* 
 dom in laying' before you the opinion T enter- 
 tain of the religion I am through the mercy of 
 God fortunate enough to be a member of, and 
 which from my soul I wish it may please the 
 Lord one day to call you to.... It is clear from 
 scripture beyond the possibility of doubts that 
 Christ established a church that did from his 
 time exist, does exist, and will exist until the 
 consummation of ages ; and that that church is 
 one holy catholic, and apostolic. That there is 
 one God, one faith, and one baptism ; and that 
 without faith it is impossible to please God. 
 There surely then cannot be two or more 
 faiths, whereby we may please him ? No, 
 there is but one. Surely then it is the most 
 important interest of every christian, to see 
 that he belongs to the true church of Christ. 
 In St. Mathew, Chapter 16 verse 15 '^ Jesus 
 saith to them." But whom do you say that I 
 am*' 16. *' And Simon Peter ansv.'cred and 
 said, thou art Christ, the son of the Ywmz 
 God" 17 '* And Jesus answering said unto 
 liim, blessed art thou Simon Bar-Jona, be- 
 cause flesh and blood hath not reveale:! it unto 
 thee, butmv Father which is in Heaven''. IS. 
 B b 2 
 
( 294 ) 
 
 And I say also unto thee ; that thou art Peter, 
 and upon this rock I will build my church, 
 and the gates of Hell shall not prevail against 
 it". 19 " And I will give unto thee the keys of 
 the kingdom of Heaven ; and whatsoever thou 
 shalt bind on earth, shall be bound in Heaven ; 
 and whatsoever thou shalt loose on earth, shall 
 be loosed in Heaven," Which sacred texts 
 prove as clearly as noon day light, the esta- 
 blishment of a church, by whom founded, and 
 on whom built. ...If it be objected that after 
 this Peter denied Christ, and was rebuked by 
 him, let it be remembered that the same power 
 and mercy which changed a persecuting Saul 
 into a great preacher and apostle could very 
 well make an Apostle who had never lost his 
 faith, the head and the foundation of his 
 church, which surely Christ did to Peter ; at 
 same time giving to him, and his successors, 
 ihe keys of the Kingdom of Heaven, saying, 
 ** go preach, and teach all nations, baptizing 
 them in the name of the Father, and of the 
 .son, and of the holy Ghost,'' *' Whatsoever you 
 bind on earth shall be bound in Heaven, and 
 whatsoever you loose on earth shall be loosed 
 :n Utav?n>,.. which clearly proves the power 
 
( 295 ) 
 
 given by Christ to his Apostles and their suc- 
 cessors, lawfully ordained in the holy catholic 
 church, of absolving from sin, when the peni- 
 tent sueing for absolution has a sincere and 
 hearty sorrow for past sins, with a firm pur- 
 pose and resolution to avoid sin and its occa- 
 sions in future... .for without those previous 
 dispositions on the part of the penitent, no 
 power on earth whether Pope Priest or Bishop 
 can validly give absolution to any person 
 whatever ; and this is an article of the catholic 
 faith,... Now that the church has been visible 
 in all ages since its establishment, is evident 
 by the regular succession of Popes, Priests, 
 and Bishops : from St, Peter down to the pre- 
 sent day; joined to the united testimony of the 
 holy fathers in every age.... which several tes- 
 timonies have been confirmed by the blood of 
 innumerable martyrs, who sealed their faith 
 with their Blood in every age of the church of 
 Christ, since its establishment.... That church 
 has been guided by the spirit of God, which 
 as promised will lead her into all truth, even 
 unto the end of the world. 
 
 In St. Mathew, are we not directed to ap- 
 ply to the church? and is it not adde4 that 
 
( 296 ) 
 
 '* he that will not hear the church, let him be 
 unto thee as an heathen and a publican."....! f 
 the church was invisible how could she be 
 applied to ? how could she be heard ? It is 
 then evident that the church since its esta- 
 blishment was always visible, and \^ill conti- 
 nue so ; and that church consists of the great 
 body of catholics spread over the believing 
 world ; and reunited under one visible liead 
 the Pope.... Compared to which, all other sects 
 added together, are but few in number; and 
 whose single point of unity, seems to be their 
 unjust and uncharitable aspersions against 
 their mother church ; fi om whom every one 
 of them may be said to have separated.... But 
 finding myself passing the bounds of a letter, 
 I will come to a conclusion by earnestly re- 
 commending to you ; If you should not for the 
 present be disposed to think as I do, not to 
 refuse at least recommending yourself to God 
 morning and evening in this, or some such 
 manner.... O God who seest the secrets of all 
 hearts, and knowest the sincerity of mine, be 
 graciously pleased to compassionate thy ser- 
 vant; and if I am not in the right faith, be 
 graciously and mercifully pleased to lead me 
 
( 297 ) 
 
 into it f assuring thee, that so soon as thy holy 
 ^vill shall be manifested unto me I shall hum- 
 bly and cheariully embrace and follow it.".... 
 Some such prayer humbly and perseveringly 
 addressed to God, cannot possibly fail of suc- 
 cess or be by any considered improper, for tho' 
 man may deceive; surely God never will. 
 In finishing this letter I once more beg of you 
 not to be offended, nor to forget that counsel 
 should not be despised, though proceed- 
 ing from the mouth of a fool. That every 
 blessing and happiness may attend you and 
 your worthy family, is the sincere wish of 
 yours £s?c. J : C : 
 
 P : S. If at any time you would wish to see 
 a full account of our faith.... Gother's catholic 
 christian instructed *' Doctor Hay's sincere 
 christian. "....or '' Maning's short way to end 
 disputes''.... will fully satisfy you. 
 
 LETTER CXVIII. 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis....to Mr. J. €. 
 
 Waterfcrd^ November 26, 1791. 
 
 iJEAH SIR. 
 
 I AM much obliged, by your kind soli- 
 citude concerning my Eternal welfare, and re- 
 
( 298 ) 
 
 ceive your letter, as the effusion of a friendly 
 heart.... But as I v/as ever averse to controver- 
 sy, I shall not ansvver yours as a clisputantj 
 (there is too much of that already in the world) 
 not from the v.eakness ci' my cause, but from 
 a sense of my own inability to defend it.... My 
 faith is not founded on St. Peter, or St. Paul ^ 
 on pope or bishop of any sect ; but on the 
 Lord Jesus Christ alone who died for my 
 sins, and rose again for my j ustification, and 
 now intercedes for me at the right hand of 
 God.. ..To him alone my soul looks for par- 
 don, and acceptance, and am not disappoint- 
 ed....! find access to him by faith, and every 
 trial is sweetened by a sense of his favour.... 
 I find many deficiencies in myself daily; I 
 come to him by faith, under a deep sense of 
 my necessities, and he docs not send me 
 empty away ; but enables me to rejoice hum- 
 bly before him.. ..My heart is open in prayer 
 to him, for «// mankind....! believe through 
 l^is merit and death, all might be saved ; that 
 all are not saved, is owing to their own wil- 
 .ful rebellion against God, and not to their 
 not being members of any particular com- 
 iTiunity...,! would not dare to confine the 
 
C 299 ) 
 
 mercy of God to any particular body of 
 people; nor would I strain any text in the 
 book of God to exclude any from his mer- 
 cy....! belive the whole Christian church of 
 every denomination is the visible church of 
 Christ ; But that thT)se only who worship 
 him in spirit and in truth, who love him, 
 and keep his commandments, are mem*bers 
 of his invisible church, and are accepted of 
 him.... This is, and has been for many years, 
 my faith ; In which I find myself happy in 
 life, and willing to die ; and by the grace of 
 my God resolved not to change.... Wishing 
 you all happiness in time and Eteniity....! 
 am Dear Sir.... Your Friend and humble 
 Servant. 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS, 
 
 LETTER CXiX. 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis...to Mr. 
 
 The Editor believes the following concise 
 account of Mrs. Bennis's experience, is the 
 one alluded to, in Letter 3d. and hopes it 
 will not be found vnhitej'esting. 
 
 Limerick^ October 18, 1765. 
 I WAS very young when the spirit of 
 God began to strive with me.... In my child- 
 
( 3Q0 ) . 
 
 hood I had many drawings, which then pas- 
 sed unheeded by me... When I was about 
 ten or eleven years old, I threw aside the 
 forms of prayer which I had learned, and 
 prayed extempore when alone ; I found no 
 form of words could affect my heart, or ex- 
 press my wants, like those which proceeded 
 from a feeling sense of my wants. I was of- 
 ten given to see myself a sinner, and to trem- 
 ble under the wrath of God ; but these con- 
 victions were not lasting. Religion did in- 
 <leed appear to me in a most amiable and de- 
 sirable light, at the same time that I found it 
 a drudgery to myself....! was fond of read- 
 ing, and would sometimes read books of 
 Divinity for want of others, and would then 
 observe the effect that these had upon my 
 mind different from the others, in calming 
 my passions, collecting my ideas, governing 
 my will, and bringing such a sweet serenity 
 into my soul, as enabled me to go through 
 my little domestic duties with composure 
 and chearfulness ;....Yet could not confine 
 myself to such books....! was, I belive about 
 thirteen or fourteen years old, when Mr. 
 Allen's alarm came to mv hands, this was the 
 
( 301 ) 
 
 first alarm my conscience got. When I had 
 read but a part, 1 began to fear exceedingly, 
 and got into such a tremor that my teeth 
 chattered together, and every hmb trembled, 
 as in a strong ague -fit. I then resolved to 
 read no more, least (according to the authors 
 observation) I should be accountable for read- 
 ing and rejecting the means of information 
 and instruction, laid down in this book at 
 the day of Judgment... .But I was immedi- 
 ately given to sec, that I must be accounta- 
 ble for every means of instruction and infor- 
 mation which / might have, as well as for 
 those which I really had, I saw that wilful 
 ignorance, was nothing less than wilful dam- 
 nation ; and that it was my duty to enquire 
 and make all possible and diligent search af- 
 ter truth ; as I should be (in the sight of 
 God) clear only of those things, which after 
 diligent searching I could not find out. These 
 thoughts made nie take up the book again; 
 which I then read with much prayer, be- 
 seeching the Lord to enlighten my under- 
 istanding, and to teach me his will. But 
 though I prayed for it, I was not attentive 
 as I should to the teachings of his spirit ; 
 C c 
 
( 302 ) 
 
 neither had I any other teacher to direct me 
 what to do.... I was for some years thus tos- 
 ed too and fro, during which time I had ma- 
 ny discoveries made to the eye of my mind ; 
 siich as the purity of God, who I saw could 
 not connive at sin. The justice of God in 
 punishing the wicked, I saw that the soul 
 that sinneth must die. 
 
 These considerations made me often trem- 
 ble before God, and envy the brute Creation, 
 whose miseries were to end with their lives, 
 and who I often thought were higlily favour- 
 ed of God in this respect....! was given to 
 see (in a great measure) what a christian 
 Ought to be, both as to his outward deport- 
 ment, and purity of his intentions, I was led 
 in some degree into the spirituality of the 
 law, I saw that in the sight of God, every 
 angry person was a murderer : every cove- 
 tous person an Idolater; every lewd look 
 or desire was in his sight an act of adultry ; 
 that mentioning the name of God irreverent- 
 ly, would be noticed by him as a breach of 
 his absolute command...! read die scriptures 
 constantly, often with tears, sometimes on 
 my knees J and was led to consider them 
 
( 303 ) 
 
 attentively. Yet my understanding being 
 shallow, I still remained ignorant of the 
 terms of my salvation, I saw indeed in the 
 scriptures, that without faith it is impossi- 
 ble to please God ; and that whoever is sav- 
 ed, it must be through faitli; but what this 
 faith was, I could not mnke out. I saw 
 clearly that it must be more than a bare 
 outward profession; the nominal christians 
 all around me convinced me of this ; not see- 
 ing any among the whole, whose lives I 
 thought agreeable to the scriptures, which 
 I was given to see must be the touch- 
 stone. The definition of faith, which I 
 had learned in my catechism, I could not 
 clearly understand, and some sermons 
 which I had heard on faith were not at 
 all satisfactory....! could give my assent 
 and consent to every thing mentioned in 
 the scriptures ; yet found, and felt, that I 
 was not saved from my sins, I wanted to 
 fmd out that faith u hich purifies the heart, 
 for I saw that a bare belief could not. But 
 who to enquire of, I knew not, therefore was 
 constrained to keep all these things to my- 
 self. Neither do I think it was visible in my 
 
( 304 ) 
 
 outward deportment, for both my heart and 
 my life remained unchanged...! saw myself 
 a sinner. Yet I continued in sin, still doing the 
 things for which I still condemned myself; 
 my religion was by iits, the spirit of God 
 w^ould sometimes awaken me to such a deep 
 sense of my sinfulness as to make me fear 
 and tremble ; then I would resolve to be 
 more frequent in prayer, and reading the 
 Bible, to watch more narrowly over my 
 words and actions, and to be more circum- 
 spect in all my behaviour.... But this would 
 not last long, I would soon grow weary 
 ^gain until another loud call from God w ould 
 again rouse me cut of my lethargy; then 
 I would again determine, and again grow 
 careless. I found the truth of the Apostles 
 words *' when I would do good, evil is pres- 
 ent with me," so that sometimes my life 
 was very bitter to me , in this distress I 
 would often open the Bible, to try what 
 text would come first to me. and if it was 
 a comfortable one, I would put it away, as 
 thinking it not intended for me ; but if it 
 was. a condemning one, I readily took it as 
 spoken to, and intended for me ; and would 
 
( 305 ) 
 
 weep and lament over it, because of my 
 wretched sinfulness. 
 
 Once after much trouble of soul, the 
 Lord did sweetly attract my heart, and incline 
 it to follow him, and in receiving the Sa- 
 crament, did enable me to take Christ as it 
 were in my arms, and offer him up to the 
 Father, as my propiciation. Here my bur- 
 den fell off, and my heart was filled with 
 such love, joy, and comfort, as I never be- 
 fore experienced...! looked for my sins, 
 but they were all gone, and I could only 
 rejoice in the Lord, with joy inexpressible... 
 I found at the same time a clear sense of 
 pardon; a testimony within that my sins 
 were forgiven. But this made me start, 
 thinking it a presumption, and therefore I 
 continually put it away, and would not re- 
 ceive this blessing.. ..(this was the second 
 time that I attended the Lord's table; and I 
 was then in my fifteenth year) for some 
 time I was very happy, and meeting with a 
 covenant, in Mr. Allen's writings, to which 
 my whole soul acquiesced, I wrote it out, 
 4iud entered into the same solemn covenant 
 with my God, to which I subicribed my i 
 C c2 
 
( 306 ) 
 
 name, on my knees, and with much pray- 
 er; being determined to Hve wholly devo- 
 ted to him....O what a sweet time I then 
 had ! the Lord did indeed kiss me with the 
 kisses of his love; and though I have often 
 since experienced large manifestations of his 
 grace and presence, I think none ever ex- 
 ceeded this. I have often looked back on it 
 with a pleasing regret.... But in a little time 
 I again grew careless, though I had still many 
 comfortable visits from God, yet continually 
 condemned for my unfaithfulness. I had 
 many sweet retired hours in the garden, and 
 in the fields quite alone, where I found it 
 sweet indeed to read, and pray, and medi- 
 tate. Yet all this passed unknown to, and 
 unheeded by any.... I then often thought, hovr 
 comfortable a thing a christian friend would 
 . be, to w horn I might declare all that passed in 
 my heart and would have prized such an one 
 as my greatest treasure below, but did not 
 then ever expect to meet with such. 
 
 In my eighteenth year, my father died, and 
 in two years after, I married....! had still by 
 intervals happy moments, and stings of con- 
 -science, I saw I was not right, yet thought 
 
( 307 ) 
 
 that I was not as bad as many ; and would 
 often with the proud pharisee, thank God that 
 I was not like such or such a person, though 
 indeed I was as bad as any.... In a little time 
 I fell into some distress again about my spiri- 
 tual state ; I wanted to know assuredly, if I 
 was one of the people of God, but could not 
 find any satisfactory information : I looked 
 for the church of Christ amongst the visible 
 congregations, but could not find any body of 
 people whom I thought deserved the name ; 
 the body of people to which I belonged, (the 
 Presbyterians,) were now as I thought, the 
 most circumspect of all, yet could not see 
 that even these could be called by this name, 
 seeing many things in their common way of 
 living, which I thought, must not be accep- 
 table to God. Thus distressed and bewil- 
 dered, I would often cast myself before the 
 Lord, and beseech him if there was any other 
 more perfect or acceptable way of serving him, 
 that he would make it known to me. 
 
 This was my state, when the Lord first 
 sent Mr. Wesley's preachers to Limerick; 
 I saw Mr. Robert Swindels (who was the first 
 of them that came here to preach) pass by 
 
( 308 ) 
 
 my door with a great mob after him, who 
 hollowed and made a great noise, and some- 
 times personally insulted him, upon my en- 
 quiring who he was, they told m.e he was one 
 of the people called Suadlers, (a name then 
 given in derision to the Methodists) of whom 
 I had heard some random accounts, but had 
 no desire or intent to hear him preach ; being 
 tenacious of my own church, and her princi- 
 ples, though indeed I knew not what they 
 were : yet thought it a great pity that a portly 
 well looking man, and by every outward appear- 
 ance a gentleman » should be so shamefully used, 
 and felt a particular concern for him.... This 
 was the 17th of March 1740 and the first 
 time that any of these preachers had come 
 here ; nor was he come to make any stay, 
 only made it his way to Cork, and was now 
 going to stand up in a convenient part of the 
 street to preach : this was in the morning 
 about ten o'clock : I did not go to hear him, 
 nor would my pride suffer me to mix with 
 such a rabble ; but afterwards hearing a gi'eat 
 account of the sermon, from a person who 
 was there, I resolved to go in the evening, 
 when I heard he was to preach again ; which 
 
( 309 ) 
 
 I did> anc} was much affected ; I was asked to 
 spend the evening in company with him, my 
 heart was much softened and affected by his 
 preaching and conversation, and was deter- 
 mined I would not miss another sermon while 
 he staid in town, which was about three 
 days : Thus did the Lord soften and draw my 
 heart after himself. In about a month after, Mr. 
 Swindels returned to town, and finding many 
 here willing to receive the word, he soon es- 
 tablished a society, of which I was determin- 
 ed to be one : many things were thrown in my 
 way by Satan, to frustrate my design, but the 
 Lord my God ^vhose mercy still hoA'ered over 
 me would not suffer it : I was one of the first 
 that joined, I believe the first that stood up, 
 and gave him my name ; indeed I did it in 
 much fear and trembling, being exceedingly 
 perplexed by various reports which were 
 brought to my ears concerning the wickedness 
 and cunning of these men, who my friends 
 had stiled *' mountebank preachers." But I 
 had set a resolution, that I would not believe 
 any report, but would hear and see for myself. 
 And for this I praise my God who would not 
 suffer me to be influenced by any, until he 
 
( 310 } 
 
 should fully establish my heart in his truths, 
 and bring me to the knowledge of himself....! 
 now felt my sins, but did not see clearly where 
 my remedy lay, until one day the preacher was 
 explaining these words....*' By grace ye are 
 saved, through faith, and that not of your- 
 selves, it is the gift of God.'* I now set my- 
 self to hearken diligently, and try if I could 
 iind out, what I so long had been in search of 
 namely. . . . What true saving faith was, A nd 
 •as he explained it, the spirit of God did apply 
 the word to my heart, and gave me both to see 
 into the true nature of faith, and tliat I was 
 wholly destitute of it. 
 
 I was particularly convinced of this sin of 
 unbelief, I saw that if I had no other sin to 
 answer for, this single one would barr Hea- 
 vens gate against me. Indeed I felt the weight 
 of ail my sins, I had no rest in my bones by 
 reason of them, the remembrance of them 
 was grievous to me, and the burden intolera- 
 ble : I read my condemnation in tlie righte- 
 ous law of God, and could pronounce it just. 
 I saw that by my original stain, I had forfeit- 
 ed the divine favour, that my nature was cor- 
 rupt diroughout, in every part, poVAcr, and 
 
( 311 ) 
 
 faculty ; and could produce only corrupt fruit. 
 I saw also that my very best actions were a 
 proof of this, I found that all my boasted 
 righteousness for which I had formerly valu- 
 ed myself, were but as filthy rags in the sight 
 of God; I even abhor'd them myself, they 
 vere my greatest burden, because I had 
 trusted in them : And I now found myself 
 miserable, and poor, and blind and naked, 
 without faith, and without God in the world ; 
 and I saw tliat without faith it was impossi- 
 ble to please God, and that I was a condemn- 
 ed unbeliever. 
 
 h) this manner I was bearing my burden 
 and groaning for redemption until the 21st 
 of Jiu^t following ; that morning, at five 
 o'clock meeting, while the preacher offered 
 Christ freely to all, I found my burden in a 
 moment taken off, and my soul set at liberty ; 
 but was still afraid to lay hold of Christ as 
 mine, by reason of my unworthiness ; I could 
 not believe that my sins were pardoned, nei- 
 ther could I disbelieve : In this manner I 
 was until the 23d. when conversing with the 
 preacher about the state of my soul, the light 
 broke in upon me in a moment, and banish- 
 
( 312 ) 
 
 ed all the shades of darkness ; All doubts 
 were done away, and I could now believe in, 
 and lay hold of Christ as mine, and appropri- 
 ate his merit to my own soul ; the spirit of 
 God did bear witness with my spirit that I 
 was his child, and I could say, '* he hath loved 
 mey and given himself for ;?2e"... My soul did 
 cleave to him, and I was happy in his love : 
 Adoring and admiring this loving Redeemer, 
 and in an holy extacy crying continually. 
 •* My Lord and my God." A large scene 
 was now opened to my view, the light which 
 had broke in upon my soul, discovered to 
 me many things which until then lay hid 
 from my view.... I saw the dreadfulness of 
 that state from which I had but just escaped 
 more clearly now than I did before, and the 
 extent of that mercy which deigned to die 
 for a lost undone world ! a world of rebels, 
 still up in arins against him. And even 
 whilst they persisted in their rebellion, he in 
 an astonishing manner goes out of his ordina- 
 ry way to save them from Hell 1 by sending 
 his messengers into the streets and lanes of 
 the city, and into the high-Vvays and hedges 
 to invite, vea to comfjd them to come in : 
 
( -13 ) 
 
 And that I should be one of them, whom 
 his messengers should call, and his spirit 
 compel was to me the greatest mercy of all, 
 and matter of astonishment indeed I and of- 
 ten caused me to cry out O Lord why this 
 mercy to me ? O my God, why hast thou 
 called me and passed by thousands, why O 
 why hast thou particularised me from the 
 guilty throng ! The sense of this overpower- 
 ed me at times. Indeed I wondered how God 
 could have borne with my impieties and pro- 
 vocations so long : I saw that it was impos- 
 sible for human nature to stand before him, 
 or any covering but the righteousness of 
 Christ ; which made my heart bleed for the 
 rebellious world, whom I had but just left 
 behind, and saw still weltering in sin, and 
 drinking down swift destruction....! praised 
 God for my wonderful escape, and for the glo- 
 rious method of his salvation. I saw by faith 
 my blessed redeemer suffering in my stead, 
 that I might go free. Reaching out his bleed- 
 ing hands to me, saying, ** I have paid thy 
 ransom." *' Thy sins which were many, are 
 all forgiven thee.'* "Go in peace." And my 
 soul accepted of this, and approved of it, and 
 Dd 
 
( 314 ) 
 
 desired no other way of salvation.../l^he scrip- 
 tures also were opened to me, and appeared 
 as though I had never read them before ; the 
 seal was unloosed, and discovered a large 
 and glorious scene. 
 
 The change that God had wrought in my 
 heart had changed all around me, so that I 
 could now see God in all ; and with the poet. 
 
 " Mf ton^ie broke out in unknown strains, 
 *' And sung surprising grace !" 
 
 The partition wall of unbelief was thrown 
 down, and I was given to see into the holiest 
 ©fall, whither Jesus my Lord had entered be- 
 fore for me, to sprinkle the mercy seat with 
 his blood on my behalf, that I also might 
 enter in by the same blood.... And the more 
 I viewed the goodness of God to me, the 
 lower did I sink in humility before him. Thus 
 did the Lord create peace in my soul, bring- 
 ing order out of confusion, and thus happily 
 did I go on for about three months, before my 
 inbred corruption began to appear. I then 
 saw my heart a sink of sin, a cage of unclean 
 birds, a den of thieves ; full of pride , anger, 
 evil desire, love of the world, and every other 
 corrupt affection* And saw that I had all 
 
C 315 ) 
 
 these united with the powers of darkness to 
 encounter ; and not only so, but also the world 
 up in arms against me.... Satan had raised 
 many storms, and thrown many hindrances in 
 my way, to try if by any means he could turn 
 me back. But I had stedfastly resolved in the 
 strength of God, to persevere at all events 
 ....I w^as as a sparrow upon the house top, not 
 one of all my family or relations seeing the 
 necessity of being born again: therefore was 
 obliged to suffer much on this account ; I 
 found the truth of our Lords w^ords, " All 
 that will live Godly in Christ Jesus shall suf- 
 fer persecution," and ** a mans foes shall be 
 those of his own household."....! found I was 
 now called to suffer..,.! thought whilst ! was 
 seeking the Lord that if I could once get an 
 interest in Christ, I should have nothing to do 
 afterward but sing and rejoice.... But I now 
 found that my faith was given me as a sword, 
 wherewith I must fight my way against the 
 world, the flesh and the Devil.... !ndeed the 
 strength of these my adversaries did often 
 make me fear exceedingly : and quake and 
 tremble : but at every time the Lord did sus- 
 tain me, and did wonderfully uphold me in 
 
( 316 ) 
 
 the midst of a thousand trials, and difficul- 
 ties, by the sweet visits of his love, and a 
 clear sense of his favour.... But this evidence 
 was not always clear, I was a poor unbelieving 
 creature, the continual risings of my corrup- 
 tions would often cloud my evidence, and 
 grievously distress my soul, so that I often 
 went heavily, mourning over my continual re- 
 voltings, sometimes up, and sometimes down, 
 according to them words of the hymn; 
 
 '* Strong^ in faith, I seem this hour, 
 •• Strip't the next cf all my power." 
 
 The Lord did often give me unquestionable 
 evidences of his love, such as would silence 
 all my unbelief of heart, and make me cry 
 out, '* Lord it is enough.^* But at other 
 times my soul went heavily groping in the 
 dark, distressed and crying out for God, often 
 cast down by the risings of pride, Anger, 
 anxious desires, and fears and cares about 
 temporal things, these continually brought 
 condemnation and distress on my soul, and 
 often caused me to cry out in bitterness of 
 spirit, *' O wTctched one that I am, who shall 
 deliver me from this body of death"; the 
 weight of these my corruptions pressed me tp 
 
( 317 ) 
 
 he earth, and grew every day still more heavy ; 
 I began now to see the necessity of that holiness, 
 without which none shall see the Lord ; for I 
 saw I was unholy throughout, a miyacle of grace 
 and sin ! pardoned, yet still alas unclean. 
 •...I saw that the justification of my person 
 would not do, without the sanctification of 
 my nature ; but how this should be accom- 
 plished I was quite ignorant, and had no 
 hopes of being delivered until I came to die, 
 w^hich made me earnestly long to lay down 
 my body, that I might also lay down my sin. 
 I was weary of my life, because of my pro- 
 pensity to sin, and would be content that God 
 should even deny me the consolations of his spi- 
 rit, if he would but keep me from sining against 
 him. Thu:3 1 continued sometimes mourning 
 and sometimes rejoicing, but continually bear- 
 ing my burden until the year 1757. Indeed lo 
 .sometime before, I saw a possibility of being de- 
 livered from sin even in this life, and was some* 
 times filled with sweet expectatio;".s of it, yet it 
 seemed still at a great distance. But about this 
 time the promise was brought nigh : I saw 
 that God w^as as willing to sanctify the unholy 
 as he was to justify the ungodly, and the 
 D d 2 
 
( 318 ) 
 
 tidings of this was sweet to my souL...I wts 
 weary of my burden and longed to lay it down. I 
 
 "' Weary of this wai* within, 
 * Weary of this endless strife, 
 " Weary of myself and sin j 
 " Wear)' of a wretched life." i 
 
 I wanted to love my God with ail my heart, 
 but found I could not, so long as the carnal 
 mind remained j which made me groan for | 
 deliverance, and rejoice at the prospect of its 
 being near. 
 
 I was now particularly stired up to seek a 
 total deliverance from all my inbred corrup- 
 tions, and encouraged to hope, as I found 
 that God was just at this time blessing his people 
 in a vronderful manner ; purifying their hearts 
 by faith. And that several in England and 
 Ireland (some of them in the country soci- 
 eties near Limerick) had just now made 
 profession that God had cleansed their hearts 
 from all sin : and many earnestly pressing af- 
 ter it. My soul also was filled with earnest 
 hungering and thirsting after it : Mr. Olivers 
 who was then our stationed preacher was also 
 much stired up to preach it, and press it home 
 tipon the society, but there were but few, 
 
( 319 ) 
 
 very ^w who could receive his testimony : I 
 think only two more and I ; and we three 
 used to meet often to confer together, and 
 were all on full stretch after this blessing.... 
 But were as yet equally ignorant of the na- 
 ture of that grace which we so earnestly de- 
 sired ; but the sight we had of our inbred 
 corruptions made us miserable without it, 
 and in the bare prospect of our deliverance, 
 we enjoyed unspeakable comfort : but as in 
 this we were singular from all the society 
 (which I believe consisted of near three hun- 
 dred persons;) my friends in the Society 
 began to fear for me, least I should go too 
 far, and as they did not see either the pro- 
 bability, or necessity of having their hearts 
 cleansed from sin, they began to take some 
 pains with me, until they had partly reasoned 
 and partly laughed me out of my earnestness. 
 Thus was the fervour of my desires abated, 
 and some of my friends rejoiced at my de- 
 liverance.... Now was I more miserable than 
 before, my corruptions stood still before 
 me, and pressed my soul to the dust, and Sa- 
 tan brought continual condemnations against 
 me for the sinfulness of m heart ; and so 
 
( .32€» 
 
 great was my ignorance that I continually 
 accused myself for what I felt, but could not. 
 help :...the Lord did often bear his testimonY 
 with my Spirit that I was his Child. 
 But the reasonings of my enemy, the strength 
 of my corruptions, and the unbelief of my 
 heart, was ever questioning ihe work of Go J 
 on my soul, and grieving his spirit, and 
 caused me in the midst of blessings to be un- 
 happy ; the fears of deceiving myself robbed 
 me of the blessings which I had in possession, 
 and my unbelief brought on me unthankful- 
 ness, and then hardncis of heart, until a kind 
 of stupification had overspread my whole soul ; 
 and I became less watchful, less tender, less 
 circumspect, until I first lost the witness and 
 then the consolations of God's spirit :... Indeed 
 the Lord did not leave me all at once, but the 
 visits of his love grew shorter and seldomer, 
 until at length I was left wholly destitute of 
 any ; yet even then the Lord did not suffer 
 me to fall into outward sin, or to quit his peo- 
 ple, or the means of grace. But having lost 
 the presence of God, and being truly sensi- 
 ble of my loss. I became completely misera- 
 ble ; the wretchedness of this my state, as a 
 
( 321 ) 
 
 ghost haunted me continually, Yet how to be 
 delivered from it, I knew not ; my greatest 
 struggles were fruitless efforts, I could do no- 
 thing but sin and grieve..,. In this state I 
 bore the weight of a class, and band ; the 
 burden of which had almost sunk me into 
 the earth. I made several applications to the 
 preachers to take them from me, but all re- 
 fused, and I dare not obstinately give them 
 up, least in so doing I should sin against 
 God.... It is indeed remarkable that I seldom 
 had either power or comfort in prayer during 
 this state of deadness, except in my band 
 and class, and seldom without it there:.... 
 Blessed be my good and gracious Lord, who 
 did not leave me to myself in this my most 
 grievous state.... Thus I continued more mis- 
 erable than words can express for near two 
 years, 'till in the year 1762 Mr. Wesley came 
 to tliis town, and again revived the doctrine 
 of holiness of heart ; this was as a dagger to 
 my very soul, because of my own fallen state : 
 the beauty of holiness stood continually be- 
 fore me, and served as a clear mirror to 
 shew me more truly my own darkness, I 
 ^aw the desirableness of that happy state, but 
 
-( 322 ) 
 
 alas it was far out of my reach, it appeared to 
 me, as the chilclrens bread, which dogs like 
 me must not touch, until Mr. Wesley in one 
 of his sermons described my state much 
 clearer than I could myself, and then encour- 
 aged such to seek the Lord both for justifi- 
 cation and sanctification, saying that God was 
 able, and could give the two blessings at once, 
 and that he did not find it said any where, in 
 scripture that he would not ; these words came 
 with power to my heart, and I was determined 
 to seek the Lord with all my might, and ne- 
 ver to rest until I had received some bles- 
 sing from him,. .From this time I found pow- 
 er to wrestle and strive with God in prayer, 
 and in a few weeks after, whilst I was at pray- 
 er the Lord did heal my backslidings, giving 
 me power to believe in him, and a steadfast 
 assurance of my acceptance through Christ ; 
 and filled my heart with abundance of peace 
 and love.... Yet 1 could not rest here, I soon 
 felt the corruptions of my heart, and could 
 not be content with less than a total deliver- 
 ance.... The Lord had greatly revived his work 
 amongst us at this time, and was deepening it 
 in the hearts of his children, he had enabled 
 
( 223 ) 
 
 soliie to testify that the blood of Christ cleau- 
 seth from all sin, and others were earnestly 
 seeking alter it. This made me cry the more 
 mightily to God, least the shower should pass 
 away and my soul remain un watered. 
 
 Yet here again the fears of deceiving my- 
 self made me prescribe rules to God ; I was 
 not content to receive this gift in his own 
 way : Indeed I was very ignorant of God's 
 manner of working this grace in the heart, 
 and therefore looked for it to come with obser- 
 vation, and could not be content to re- 
 ceive it in the small still voice, least I 
 should deceive myself. The Lord did 
 at this time abundantly bless my soul, by 
 pouring in large manifestations of his love ; 
 I searched for my corruptions but could not 
 find them; my soul rejoiced continually, 
 and could find nothing in my heart but love 
 to my God, and a continual breathing after 
 him.... The rapture of my soul would some- 
 times awake me out of sleep, and keep me 
 awake most part of the night ; and found it 
 often spoke into my heart, that God had ful- 
 ly wrought my deliverance : But here I m ould 
 
( 324 ) 
 
 Start again from it, with fear least I should 
 deceive myself. 
 
 The time that I first found this change 
 wrought in my heart, was at prayer whilst 
 I was earnestly \^Testling for Holiness of 
 heart, when by a sudden act of faith I was 
 enabled to lay hold on the promise, and to 
 rejoice in my deliverance ; being very hap- 
 py in my soul : but coming from prayer, 
 was immediately pursued by the enemy with 
 showers of doubts and fears, which put me 
 to a stand, not knowing whether to yield, 
 or keep my hold, I took the Bible beseech- 
 ing the Lord to give me a text on which I 
 might take hold in this time of my exigence, 
 and opened on Mark 11 & 24 " therefore 
 I say unto you, what things soever ye desire 
 when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, 
 and ye shall have them. "...This brought 
 much comfort to my soul, and I was ena- 
 bled for some time to believe but soon shuf- 
 fled aside by giving way to doubts and fears, 
 though my soul remained abundantly happy, 
 loving my God and rejoicing in him... Some 
 time after, being distressed about my state 
 not knowing whether to lay hold on the tes- 
 
C 325 ) 
 
 limony I' found in my breast, of my heait 
 being made clean, or to yield to the doubts 
 and fears which continually haunted me ; in 
 this state least my iself before the Lord in prayer, 
 beseeching him to answer for himself, and re- 
 eeived then a strong assurance, that the work 
 was done ; but my enemy still pursued me 
 with fears least I should deceive myself, and 
 as all this was wrought on my soul in much 
 stillness, I fear'd least it should not be genu- 
 ine, and calling to mind others who had re- 
 ceived this blessing with much rapture and 
 extacy of soul ; I said if the work on my 
 soul was right, I also should receive it in the 
 same manner. Thus distressed, and not 
 knowing whac to conclude, I took the bible, 
 beging an answer in this matter, and opened 
 into 1 Corinthians 126 & ** and there are di- 
 versities of operations, but it is the same 
 God\\h\Q\\ workcih all in all,^'* 
 
 Surely this should have silenced all m}- 
 unbelief, but my cunning adversary would 
 not suffer me to rest, but kept me still doubt- 
 ing telling me these 4exts came only by 
 chance, and not as an answer of prayer. Some 
 sho!t time after this, I vvas writing to a chris- 
 E e 
 
( 326 ) 
 
 tian friend, who desired to know my state^ 
 and being thus tossed about by doubts ancT 
 fears, I knew not what to say. My soul was 
 continually very happy, yet kept constantly 
 tjuestioning about my state ; so that I fear'd 
 concluding at the one side or the other : this 
 day whilst I was writing to my friend, I was 
 much agitated whether I should relate to 
 him all my experience or not, when all on a 
 sudden the Lord did pour such a measure of 
 his love into my heart, as I was scarcely able 
 to contain ; and was constrained to quit my 
 ^^riting, and go to prayer : and had then a 
 strong testimony in my breast that the Lord 
 had taken the bent of backsliding out of my 
 heart ; but this was followed by such strong 
 reasonings to the contrary-, and fears of deceiv- 
 ing myself, that put me again to a stand, so 
 that I knew not what to say to my friend con- 
 cerning my state. Being thus exceedingly 
 perplexed, I cried out as in an agony. *' Lord 
 shew me what thou Mouldst have me do". 
 It was immediately cast into my mind, since 
 I would not believe God in any other wa}-, 
 .to go 7ionx) to the bible, and see what he should 
 say to me on this head ; but was afraid to da 
 
( 327 
 
 this, least I should oftendGod by putting hioi 
 *o often to the proof; thus agitated I sat 
 down to finish my letter but could have no 
 rest until I would open the Bible, and see 
 what God would have me do. 
 
 Then taking the bible, and requesting the 
 Lord to guide me right, I opened it, on Ro- 
 mans X. &: loth. '* With the heart man 
 believeth unto righteousness, and with the 
 itiouth confession is made unto salvation'' 
 Here surely my request was fully answered, 
 and my mouth should have been stopped ; 
 but my adversary would not let me rest, but 
 kept me still reasoning, doubting, and fearing; 
 and puting away the blessings of God from 
 me, and was at last determined not to receive 
 this blessing whilst it was accompanied with 
 xloiihts or fears ; , thus my ignorance block'd 
 up my way still, until by degrees I lost my 
 fervor of spirit, and the sweet communion I 
 enjoyed with God ; and again found the 
 strength of my corruptions even as before. 
 Now I could look back, and see what I had 
 lost by suffering unbelief to prevail and not 
 iiccepting God on his own terms. The Lord 
 <lid not withdraw his pard^pning mercy from 
 
( ^^8 ) 
 
 iiic, 1 iVLLUiicd a scii^e of u\\ iic:cq)Uiiicc 
 ihroiiijh Christ, and was happy in liis love ; 
 but could not rest there, and was detemiined 
 I vjoidd t.ot. The weight of my inbred sin 
 w as grie\'Ous to be borne ; my soul was even 
 pressed under the load... .Indeed tlie Lord 
 did aLR}rd m.e graeious visits of^ylns love, butr 
 :his could not satisfy, so long as his enemies 
 remained in my heart ; so long as I found it 
 bent to backslide from him. I saw that I did 
 not love God with all my heart ; m} husband, 
 and children were idols set up in, and kept 
 the place that God should ha\ c ; neith.el' could 
 I by any means tear tliem thence, though I 
 laboured hard to do it. INIy distress Avas in- 
 deed ver}' great, and often ^^Tought impatience 
 in my heart even against God : When the 
 eai"nestness of my soul would not let me see 
 why God should delay the blessing I so anx- 
 iously sought after, one moment longer....! 
 was now ^\ illing to receive God in his own 
 vray, and on his own terms ; ^\'illing to be 
 any thing, even to die, if only by death I 
 might be delivered ; and was determined I 
 would not rest without it :....! was resolved 
 by ^he grace of God that nothing should hin- 
 
( 329 ) 
 
 der on my part, and therefore lopped off every 
 thing in my practice that appeared even doubt- 
 ful to me. Thus I continued earnestly strive- 
 ing, and my soul unspeakably happy, until 
 the. 22d. of May 1763, being Whitsunday. 
 My heart had been much drawn out, in earn- 
 est and sweet expectation for some days be- 
 fore, that God would on that day visit my soul, 
 and make it a pentecost indeed to me. Under 
 these expectations, I attended the Lords table, 
 and being on my knees before I went to the 
 altar, I laid my case before the Lord, deplor- 
 ing my wretchedness by reason of the contin- 
 ual revoltings of my heart from him : Be* 
 seeching him, that he would do any thing with 
 me, only to save me from sining against him* 
 My soul was indeed in deep distress, and my 
 state appeared to me like that of the Lepper at; 
 the Pool side ; both as to my disorder, and 
 my utter helplessness and inability to arise i 
 and from a feeling sense of this my state, my 
 soul cried the more earnestly after Christ, 
 having nothing to plead but my wretchedness, 
 and seeing Him pass by who only could help 
 me; when these words of our Lord were 
 spoke to my heart, " Bclievest thov, that I 
 Ee 2 
 
( 330 ) 
 
 am able to do this", my soul eagerly answer- 
 ed, " Lurd I do believe thou art ^ble", the 
 ^vord came again. '' Be it unto thee according 
 to thy faith".. ». Here 1 was enabled to lay 
 hold for a moment ; but unbelief came in, 
 and raised disturbance in my breast, and I 
 eould only cry. " Lord make me believe. 
 Lord give me stronger faith, I believe thou 
 art able. Lord I believe thou art able ; and 
 I will hold thee here until thou givest me 
 more." Thus I went to the table of the Lord, 
 my soul breathing out in earnest desires and 
 expectations, still crying " Lord I believe 
 thou art able", and in receiving the memo- 
 rials, my soul was enabled to lay hold on 
 Christ for my complete salvation from all sin. 
 But my busy enemy still pursued me, and 
 would feign have plucked it from me, so that 
 my soul kept grapling as it were, to keep her 
 hold : and awhile prevailed, and then almost, 
 lost hold, and then up again. In this manner 
 I came from the communion with my soul 
 exceeding happy, but closely exercised.... 
 Then arose a question in my mind, '* But- 
 what particular grace is it that I have been so 
 eagerly wrestling for ?" I answered, '^Thiit* 
 
( 331 ) 
 
 I should have power to live without sining 
 against God." The question came again, 
 ** But where is the Scripture for this ; there 
 has none been given to me." Then immedi- 
 ately came that Scripture to my mind, ^' Sin 
 shall not ha^oc dominion over youJ^'' This 
 brought much comfort to my soul, and I 
 strove to stay me on the promise ; thus I 
 continued grapling hard, sometimes up, and 
 sometimes down until the 2d. of June, when 
 being at private prayer, I besought the Lord 
 to deliver my soul from the power of my ad- 
 versary, and that he would give me to feel 
 that entire salvation in him^ which my soul 
 thirsted after.... Whilst I thus prayed, the 
 Lord did remove all my burden, and enlarg- 
 ed my heart, and admitted me to a closer 
 communion with him than ever I had before ; 
 then I said, I will now ask to have my idols 
 taken out of my heart ;....But whilst I sought 
 them, they were gone ! taken away in a mo- 
 ment ! and their place so filled with God, that 
 there was no room for any thing beside. O 
 how shall I describe what I then felt ! Indeed 
 it is past the power of tongue to utter, ,or 
 'thought to conceive ; and can only be known 
 
( 332 ) 
 
 to those who have experienced the like.... I 
 sought for my husband and children in my 
 heart, (that is I examined whether my heart 
 was in any degree so bound up in them, as to 
 seperate any part of it from God) But they 
 were given up to God, and my soul so filled 
 with his love, that I was constrained to cry 
 out : " Lord Jesus, thou art the only object 
 *' of my soul, thou hast taken possession of my 
 " heart, and there is no room for any beside 
 ** thyself, thou art my portion, my only trea- 
 ** sure, and as such my soul with all her 
 " strength lays hold on thee, instead of every 
 ** other good ; giving up every other comfort, 
 ^* for thee my God^ my Jesus, my all.'' Thus 
 did my soul breath after God, being wraped 
 up in his love, and brought to such a sweet 
 nearness and union with him as I never be- 
 fore experienced....! was now again brought 
 as it were into a new world ; my desires, my 
 aifections, and every faculty of my soul, was 
 as it were new moulded. The scriptures were 
 again opened to me, and I was given to see 
 more clearly into their spiritual meaning, 
 and every promise therein contained was, as 
 I read them, sealed upon my heart, yea and 
 
( ?3J ) 
 
 amen:.... The people of" God were now more 
 than ordinary dear to me, the name of Jesus 
 I found indeed as Ointment poured into my 
 soul, so that my heart did even dance, and 
 felt an uncommon emotion of joy; at barely 
 hearing the name of Jesus pronounced : The 
 h\v and purity of God, was precious, very 
 precious to me ; my soul cried out with the 
 Royal Psalmist....** O how I love thy law?*. 
 I now found an entire deliverance from those 
 evil tempers, affections and desires, which 
 before were so grievous to me: and could 
 now see clearly that I did love the Lord my 
 God with all my heart, without one negative 
 in my whole soul ; and could see my will 
 wholly brought under subjection to his divine 
 will, so that my heart cried continually, *' thy 
 will be done'\ 
 
 My love to God, was now quite of another 
 kind, from that I had ever before experienc- 
 ed ; more pure, entire and disinterested, 
 without any mixture of self, indeed the 
 change cannot be described. I was very 
 happy before it, under a sense of the pardoning, 
 love of God, of my acceptance through Christ: 
 and had often sweet access to him by faith. 
 
( 33i ) 
 
 But what I now experienced, under the full 
 influence of sanctification, did as far exceed 
 what I felt in a justified state, as what I 
 then experienced did what I felt when I 
 was first seeking redemption ; the things 
 which I found before grievous to me, and 
 which occasioned me in the midst of com- 
 forts to be unhappy (I mean- the cor- 
 ruptions of my nature) were now taken 
 away, the bent of backsliding was taken out 
 of my heart, so that it did naturally and conti- 
 nually cleave to Christ, breathing after him, 
 and longing to be wholly united to him : and 
 my soul was allowed sweet, near, and free 
 acces s to him. Thus did the Lord bring me^ 
 worthless and unworthy, to the glorious li- 
 berty of his children :....But though I was 
 thus abundantly happy, yet I found that I had 
 not got out of the reach of my adversary ; he 
 was continually bringing in a train of doubts, 
 and fears, upon me, which I was obliged to car- 
 ry to Christ to answer : and often to stand as 
 it were sword in hand, that I might not be 
 overcome.. ..It was often objected in my mind, 
 may I not feel a total deliverance from all sin, 
 or inclination to evil, and my heart filled with 
 love to God and man, and yet my heart not be 
 
( 335 ) 
 
 cleansed from sin ? May there not be a sus^ 
 pension without a total deliverance? These and 
 many other questions which arose in my mind, 
 made me earnestly desire that God would 
 give the testimony of his spirit, to the work he 
 had wrought ; this I thought I might claim on 
 the warrant of that word.../' We have receiv- 
 ed the spirit that is of God, that we may know 
 the things that are freely ghen to us of God^\ 
 The experience of others who could rejoice 
 in this testimony encouraged me to ask for 
 myself, believing that God would give it, 
 and therefore was encouraged to wrestle the 
 more earnestly ; and on the 29th of June as 
 I was at private prayer, and determined not to 
 give up until I had obtained my request : my 
 soul was brought near to God, and im- 
 portunate for this blessing, when these 
 words were spoken to my heart.../' What 
 ivouldst thou that I should do for thee'*'*. 
 I answered '* Lord that I might be made 
 clean" the word came again, " / w?7/, he thmi 
 x/<f^;/"...this came with power and assurance, 
 so that I was enabled to praise God for cleans- 
 ing my heart from sin, this was accompa- 
 nied with a ray of divine light by which I 
 could discover mv heart, and see no sin in 
 
( 336 ) 
 
 it ; the same light by which I before could 
 see my heart all sin, now discovered it whol- 
 ly cleansed and given up to God ; indeed I 
 know not how to describe this testimony, it 
 was as a light brought suddenly into a dark 
 room, by means of which one might dis- 
 cover every thing in the place : this was also 
 accompanied with much sweetness, confi- 
 dence and delight of soul, and made me go 
 on my way rejoicing for some time : but 
 Satan still thrust sore at m^e, and seemed 
 determined to make my path as thorny as he 
 could, he raised grievous trials against me, 
 from without ; such as I never had before to 
 struggle with, and such as I think I could 
 not have borne in my former state :....but in 
 all I found my God ever near: but most 
 grievous of all was his inward temptations, 
 continually questioning the work of God on 
 my soul. In this case the subtilty of my 
 enemy, and my o\^ n ignorarxe often brought 
 me into great distress. 
 
 Indeed the testimony of God's spirit did 
 Mill continue, and shone on my heai t, some 
 times with a clearer, and sometimes with a 
 fainter light :...but finding many things in the 
 
( oS7 ) 
 
 course ef my experience, which I did not 
 expect to find in that state, together with 
 the fears of deceiving myself (which still 
 haunted me) made me ready to hearken to the 
 voice of the enemy, when I should be simply 
 
 believing in Jesus Thus I continued in- 
 
 expressibly happy, yet foolishly giving way 
 to doubts, and fears, and questioning the 
 work of God on my heart, notwithstanding 
 so many clear evidences ; until I again lost 
 this witness ; after ha^dng retained it for above 
 fifteen months. I did not indeed lose my 
 grace, blessed forever be my God, he did not 
 suffer me to fall, though he punished me 
 for ray folly, by withdrawing this comfort, 
 able testimony of his Spirit. Now I could 
 look back and see what I had lost by heark- 
 ening to the reasonings of my enemy : the 
 want of this blessing proved the value of it ; 
 I could not now sec the work of God on my 
 heart, any other way, than by its own light, 
 which was not always clears and therefore 
 could not satisfy. This caused much sor- 
 row, and stired me up to ask of God, that he 
 would again restore this comfortable witness 
 of his spirit, that '' I might know the thinsp^ 
 F f 
 
( 838 ) 
 
 tfiit were freely given to me of God." Thus 
 did I continue for about a year, I was indeed 
 happy in God, but often under a painful un. 
 certainty concerning my state (that is con- 
 cerning my sanctification, for indeed the 
 witness of my justification was continual- 
 ly clear since the 22nd. of May 1763* 
 without one doubt concerning it) at times I 
 say, the work shone by its own light, but at 
 other times I feared least sin should still 
 lurk in my heart, and this thought pained 
 my very soul. 
 
 This was my state when } ou my friend, 
 Requested that I would give you in writing an 
 account of my experience. Your request 
 made me cry the more earnestly to God for 
 the witness of his spirit, that I might see 
 clearly the present state of my soul : when 
 four days since, w hile I was writing part of 
 this, I w^as struck w ith a sentence I had just 
 wrote ; in an instant the hght broke in upon 
 my heart, and I was enabled to believe : this 
 was accompanied with Peace, Comfort, and 
 Joy : and afterward it w^as (at prayer) made 
 indisputably clear to me, that God had ta- 
 ken possession of my heart, and that it was 
 
( 339 ) 
 
 ^.ovv wholly given up to htm, and still I am 
 enabled to see it, and believe;... though Satan 
 does endeavour to distress my mind by bring- 
 ing in many doubts upon me; but I trust my 
 God will enable itie to keep my hold, and 
 stand by faith ; the enemy of my soul does 
 strew my way with thorns, but my Blessed 
 Jesus does enable me to believe in him, and 
 by faith to conquer every difficulty, and an- 
 swer every objection which Satan suggests ; 
 J do not^ nor ha^e not found since the Whit- 
 sunday before mentioned, any thing in my 
 heart contrary to pure love ; no love of the 
 World- no evil Desire, Pride, Anger, or un- 
 belief: Indeed I do find sorrow, and trouble, 
 and grief, for many things, as the occasions 
 occur ; and in those things where I used to find 
 anger beset me, I now find grief and sor- 
 row, without any condemnation, I am always 
 more or less happy , but at no time unhappy, 
 having a continual abiding sense of God's fa- 
 vour ; I have no fear, but that of a sweet 
 comfortable fear of offending God. 
 
 But alas ! I see I come short, in e^cry 
 thing, of what I should be; in faith, in meek- 
 ness, in patience, in long suffering, in resig- 
 
( 340 ) 
 
 nation, in humility, in love, Indeed in ever^ 
 grace. I see that every thing I say and do, 
 might be better said, and better done :,...! see 
 my continual need of the application of the 
 blood of Christ to my soul ; indeed I never 
 did see so great a need of it as now, and am 
 enabled through grace to fly to it continually, 
 and do feel it applied to my heart, and atoning 
 for all my short comings, and this lays my 
 ^cui lew at the feet of my gracious redeem- 
 er ; abhoring myself, and leaving all I have, 
 and am behind, that I may lose myself in the 
 extent of bis m.ercy ; vrho deigned to look 
 on so poor, so worthless, so insignificant a 
 being as I am : And not only so, but still to 
 pursue, follow, entice and entreat, and may I 
 not say even to force me back, after a thousand 
 revolts. Indeed I am astonished at this, and 
 can only say. ^^ He has loved me, because 
 he is love'\...0 may I walk meekly before 
 him, all my days, who hath enabled me here 
 to set up my Ebenezer and say,.../' Thus' 
 iar hath my God helped me". 
 
 Thus my dear friend I have given you a 
 minute, but imperfect account of the deal- 
 ins^s of God with my soul. It is indeed 
 
( 341 ) 
 
 throughout, a history of my rebelUon, and an 
 instance of the long suffering and patience of 
 God.,.. Indeed I have often thought that tlje 
 Lord has had more trouble with me, than with 
 any other soul that ever lived.... What I am, 1 
 am by his meer unmerited gv2ic^ and mercy, and 
 to ban my soul desires to give the glory, and 
 never to lift my head but as a lost undone sin* 
 ner, saved by his free grace alone. 
 
 In what I have here written, I have endea- 
 voured to speak as clearly as I could, so that 
 though you do not understand English well, 
 I hope you will be enabled to read, and un- 
 derstand this without an interpreter.... Upon 
 reading it over, I find many things in it which 
 need mending, but shall now leave it as it is : 
 I know it would not bear the eye, of the curi- 
 ous or critic ; but am not careful about this, 
 if in any degree it may be made a blessing to 
 your soul, at> the writing it has been to mine : 
 I am dissatisfied at the length of it, yet did 
 not know which part I could leave out, I have 
 indeed for this reason omitted many things 
 which otherwise I would have mentioned, 
 and might be profitable.... But be it as it is, 
 let it be a demand on you for your prayers ; 
 F f 2 
 
( 342 ) 
 
 I have muck need of them, and hope when 
 you are in a distant kingdom, tiie Lord 
 will bring me to your mind, and I trust I also 
 shall remember you. 
 
 I am my dear friend yours in our common 
 Lord^ 
 
 ELIZA BENNIS. 
 
 Mrs. Eliza Bennis died in Philadelphia, 
 June 1802. ...Aged 77 years, after struggling 
 with severe and unexpected trials, nearly the 
 last twenty years, through which her confi- 
 dence in God continued unshaken, her natu- 
 ral chearfulness, and evenness of temper una.- 
 bated, and her end was Peace. 
 
( 343 ) 
 
 THE Publisher truly grateful for the 
 very liberal encouragement this work has 
 received; regrets not being able to form a 
 correct list of the Subscribers, Several friends 
 who had received subscriptions having for- 
 warded the numbers but not the names.... also 
 several subscription papers in country towns 
 not being yet returned.... and believing that 
 no list is better than an imperfect one, has (by 
 the particular desire of a few friends) instead 
 thereof, given two Poems, written by the 
 late Mrs. E. Bennis, (and copied from her 
 Journal).... Which he hopes will be found 
 more pleasing and profitable than an useless 
 list of oamesi. 
 
( 344 ) 
 
 A WISH 
 
 Should Gob, indulgent now but grant 
 IVIy WISH, and fill up ev'ry want ; 
 Speak as to Solomon from Heaven, 
 " Ask vvhat thou wilt, it shall be given." 
 
 Say, O my soul, what would'st thou have ? 
 Look round, upon the rich and brave, 
 Examine v/ell, look round again. 
 Nor throw thy Wish away in vain. 
 
 Behold what beauteous scenes arise 
 Of Rich and Fair, of Great and Wise, 
 Sure here's enough, would Reason say, 
 Thy Wish need not be thrown away. 
 
 Or, if thou woulds't be more than great, 
 In annals fame'd for Wisdom's seat, 
 For Riches, Power, and for all 
 The product of this earthly ball. 
 See Solomon amidst his train, 
 Favour'dof God, admired by men ; 
 Earth at Ivs feet her treasure poui^, 
 Nor War disturb his peaceful hours. 
 
 Around him wailing pleasures press, 
 Prevent his call, and croud to please ; 
 A pattern he of Happiness, 
 Say would'st thou now all this possess ? 
 
 Ah NO, vexatious all and vain. 
 Deceitful pleasure ! gilded pain ; 
 He who had all these at his call' 
 Wrote VANITY upon them all ! 
 
(^ 345 > 
 
 Npr gildied roofs, nor Regal state, 
 Nor all that can be fancied great, 
 Or Wise, or FamM my soul desires, 
 Far higher still my wish aspires. 
 
 Too mean are all earth-born delights, 
 Pure heav'nly J05-S my soul invites ; 
 And Asks while prisoned in this clod, 
 A nearer union with my God. 
 
 That evVy moment I might feel 
 His Love, and know I do his will; 
 Might find no slackness on my part. 
 But praise flow constant from my Heart' 
 
 I ask no portion here below, 
 Content with what my God bestow, 
 But should I ask, I sav'd would be 
 From Riches, Sin and Poverty. 
 
 A middle state l*d choose, where free 
 From Want, or Popularity, 
 In frugal neatness I would live 
 Possessing more than Earth can give. 
 
 No Airy visitants intrude 
 My happy, blissful solitude, 
 Whose trifling chat might pain my heart, 
 And leave me wounded when they part, 
 
 Few and select my Friends should be,. 
 Dear to my Jesus, and to me ; 
 Whose holy converse still would prove 
 A furtherance to my Faith and Love. . 
 
( 34G ) 
 
 But joined in holy Friendship One, 
 I, like my Lord would have my John,^- 
 My chosen, Friend, my other part, 
 And next to Jesus in my heart. 
 
 Whose Vigilant and Impartial love, 
 Should mark my faults, and then reprove ; 
 Should all my griefs and comforts share 
 One Heart, one mind, and one in pray'er 
 
 His Love unchangeable and free, 
 Faithful and true to God and me ; 
 A Friend in ev'ry state the same, 
 And worthy of that Sacred n2imt» 
 
 Thus happy in my God and friend, 
 I'd wait 'till life's short journey end ; 
 Then with my friends above appear, 
 
 To have my Wish compleated there. 
 
 E. B. 
 February ^17(^, 
 
 * Some se]ect Christian Friend. 
 
( -^r ) 
 A FAREWELL TO THE WORLD. 
 
 Farewell gay World, fond scene of false delight, 
 Nolorgernow thy fiatVing charms invite ; 
 Too long amus'd, beguil'd, ensnarM by thee, 
 With Siren art in willing slavery. 
 
 But rousM at length by sounds of danger near, 
 Great Sinai roar'd, and wakened all my fear ! 
 Fierce Thunders roll ! and Horrors ghastly throng 
 I wakM, and wonder 'd how I slep'c so long ! 
 
 My silken cords now grievous chains appear'd, 
 No voice of mirth, but dismal sounds were heard ; 
 Realities break in (the change how great !) 
 And shew the former vision all a cheat; 
 
 AshamM, confus'd bewilder'd at the sight, 
 I fain would fly ! but chains prevent my flight ; 
 I fain would hid#, but chain J I cannot move, 
 And struggling make my chains more galling prove, 
 
 'Til spent with fruitless unavailing strife 
 My woes increase, and end my wretched life, 
 Expiring, hopeless, friendless loud I cried, 
 •' Have mercy Lord, I yield, I yield," and Died. 
 
 Then Mercy found when yielded up my breath.' 
 My God step'd in, and rescued me from Death ; 
 Knock'd ofi'my chains, rais'd up my drooping head, 
 Gave me a Kiss of peace, and smil'd and said ; 
 " O slow of heart, why did'st thou doubt my Love ? 
 '^ Who ne'er to any Soul ungracious prove, 
 " In vain thy struggling 'til my aid I give, 
 *'• y/ho yields shall conquer, and who dies shall live. 
 
( 348 ) 
 
 Come follow Me, be faithful and receive 
 The Crown which I to faithful victors give; 
 My Love shall guard thee m the trying hour, 
 Have Faith in Christ, nor fear the tempters power. 
 
 Then led me forth into the open light, 
 Where scenes of wonder strike my ravish'd sight : 
 A new Creation all around appears, 
 Myself new Create, new hopes, new joys new fears. 
 So late emergM from Darkness, Chains and Death, 
 I view myself, and scarce believe I breathe ! 
 Fall prostrate, and with grateful heart adore, 
 Disstress'd, and pained that I can do no more. 
 
 Ah Lord! I cried, thy Mercies great and wide 
 Surround, and close rr^e in on ev'ry side, 
 Beneath the weight of Gratitude I mourn, 
 But nothing have to render in return. 
 
 How shall I all thy loving-kindness shew ? 
 "WTiat woulds't thou have a worthless nothing, do f 
 Thou know'stfor thee, I would with all things part - 
 My Lord replied, *' I only ask thy heart." 
 
 Alas, I said, where will thy Mercies end ? 
 How truly art thou stil'd the Sinners Friend! 
 Ten thousand heaits like mine could not repay 
 The smallest favour of the darkest day ! 
 
 My heart which longs to be entirely thine, 
 Into thy hands I willingly resign ; 
 That Love which rescued from the depths o/Hellt 
 Hath bound it now, forever to thy will. 
 
( 349 ) 
 
 Resolved by thy Grace no more to stray, 
 O let that Grace support me in my way j 
 Freely I ev'ry other good resign 
 And take my God, instead of all for mine. 
 
 O happy choice ! my soul exulting views 
 The Blissful prospect which my faith pursues, 
 Boundless beyond what human can conceive I 
 Nor terminates in less than God can give. 
 
 Again adieu, vain world of Noise and Shew, 
 Where nought but sorrows in succession grow > 
 Delusive scene of unsubstantial bliss ! 
 Which Judas-like, betrayeth with a kiss. 
 
 Henceforth Farewell, thy once allureing smile, 
 No longer my unweary Heart beguile ; 
 No other pleasures now, my soul would prove 
 "But those pure Joys, which flow from Jesu^' love. 
 
 For him alone I evVy good forego, 
 Of pleasure, profit or ought else below, 
 My lot with my despised master take. 
 Bear his reproach, and suffer for his sake. 
 
 In him alone substantial bliss I find, 
 Earth with its Gilded toys I cast behind ; 
 Through Grace divine enabled to repel. 
 And bid this World, Eternally Farewell. 
 
 E. B. 
 
 January 1, 1772. 
 
 THE EKB. 
 
CONTENTS. 
 
 Letter. Pacz, 
 
 1. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to tlie Rev. John Wesley . . 5 
 
 2. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs, Eliza Bennis . 11 
 
 3. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev. John Wesley , l5 
 
 4. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis . If 
 
 5. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev. John Wesley . . 19 
 
 6. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis . . 23 
 
 7. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev. John Wesley , . 25 
 
 8. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis . . 27 
 
 9. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to tlie Rev. John Wesley . . 29 
 
 10. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis . . 32 
 
 11. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev. John Wesley . . 33 
 
 12. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs, Eliza Bennis . . 26 
 
 13. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis . , 37 
 
 14. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev. John Wesley . ♦ 38 
 
 15. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis . . 40 
 
 16. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev. John Weslej' . 41 
 
 17. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis . . 4$ 
 
 18. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev. Jolin Wesley . 45 
 
 19. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis . . . 48 
 
 20. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev, John Wesley . 49 
 
 21. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis . 5.3 
 
 22. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev. John Wesley . 55 
 ^3. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis , . 58 
 
 24. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev. John Wesley . 6Q 
 
 25. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis . . 64 
 
 26. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev. John Wesley . 66 
 
 27. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis . . 67 
 
 28. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev. John Wesley . 67 
 
 29. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis . . 7© 
 50- Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev. John Wesley 71 
 
31. l^e/. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Beuuls - . f^ 
 
 52. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev. John Wesley 75 
 
 33. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis • 76 
 
 ^4. Mrs. Eliza Btr.nls to tlie Rev. John Wesley 77 
 
 .>5. Rev. JoJjn Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis . . 79 
 
 36. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev. John Wesley . iO 
 
 37. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 82 
 C 8. Mrs- Eliza Bennis to the Rev. Jolin Wesley - 82 
 
 39. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis . - 85 
 
 40. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to tha Rev. John Wesley - ^6 
 
 41. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 87 
 
 42. Mrs. EiizaBs.mistothe Rev, John Wesley - S3 
 
 43. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Beni'.i.n - - 89 
 
 44. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to tlie Rev. John Wesley - 90 
 
 45. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 92 
 
 46. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev. John Wesley - 94 
 
 47. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. EHza Bennis - - 96 
 
 48. Mrs Eliza Bennis to tlie Rev. John Wesley - 98 
 
 49. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs Eliza Bennis - -101 
 .50. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev. John Wesley . 103 
 
 51. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 106 
 
 52. Mrs. Eliza Bennis tdthe Rev. John Y/esIey - 107 
 
 53. Mrs. Eliza. Bennis to the Rev. Joim Wesley - - lOD 
 
 54. Rev. John Wesley to Mrs. Elizi Bennis - 111 
 
 55. Mr. Thomas Walsh to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 112 
 56 Mrs. Eliza Bennis to Mr. Thomas Walsh - 113 
 
 57. Mr. Thomas Walsh to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 114 
 
 58. Mr. Thomas Walsh to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - 119 
 
 59. Mr, Thomas Olivers to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 121 
 
 60. Mr. William Penington to Mrs. Eiiza Bennis . 123 
 
 61. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to Mr. V/illiam Peningtcn - 124 
 
 62. Nr. Tho mas Trsvlor to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 126 
 S3. Mr. Richard Blackwell to Mrs- Eliza Bennis. - 130 
 
 64. Mrs, Eliza Benras to Mr. Richard Elackv.cll - - 131 
 
 65. Mr. Ilichird Blatkwcllto Mrs. Eliza Bennis 133 
 
46. Mr. Richard Bourke to Mrs. Eliza Bcnnis . . to4 
 
 67. Mr. Joh:i Dillon to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 1S6 
 
 68. Mr JoiiM Dillon to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - -137 
 
 69. Mr. John Dillon to Mrs, Elixa Bennis - - 140 
 
 70. Mr. John Dillon to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - -141 
 
 71. Mr. John Dillon to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - - 143 
 f2. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to Mr. Hugh Saunderson - 145 
 
 73. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to Mr J(^hn Cliristian - - 149 
 
 74. MrSv Eliza Bennis to Mr. John Christian - - -151 
 t5. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to Mr. John Christian - - 15$ 
 T6. Lieut. Ciiarlse Jones to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 163 
 
 77. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to Lieu. Charles Jones - - 104 
 
 78. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to Mr. R. T. - - - - 168 
 
 79. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to Mr. R. T. - - - - 171 
 SO. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to Mr. R. T. - - - .. 173 
 
 81. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to Mr. R. T. - - - 177 
 
 82. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to Mr. Jonathan Hern - - 181 
 
 83. Mr. Jonathan Hern to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 182 
 
 84. Mr. John Bristol to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - - 186 
 
 85. Mr. John Goodwin to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 189 
 
 86. Mr. Samuel Bradburn to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 191 
 
 87. Mrs. Ehza Bennis to Mr. Samuel Bradburn - 194 
 SB. Mr. John stretton to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 199 
 
 89. Mr. John Stretton to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 201 
 
 90. Mr. John Stretton to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 202 
 
 91. Mr. John Stretton to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 204 
 
 92. Mr. John Stretton to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 206 
 
 93. Mr. John Stretton to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 209 
 
 94. Mr. John Stretton to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 214 
 
 95. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to Mr. John Stretton - 217 
 
 96. Mr- John Stretton to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 222 
 
 97. Mrs. Ellzn Bennis to Mr. John Stretton - - 226 
 
 98. Mr. John Sfretton to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - £3^ 
 
 99. Mr. John Stretton to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 237 
 100. Mr. John Stretton to Mrs. Eli/a Bennis - - ^40 
 
lOi. Mr. John Stfetton to Mrs. EUza Bennis - - 2ft 
 
 102. Mr. John Stretton to Mrs. Eliza Bennis • - 245 
 
 103. Mr. John Stretton to Mrs. Eliza Bennis . - 247 
 
 104. Mr John Stretton to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 25B 
 lOS- Mr. John Stretton to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - • 255 
 
 106. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to .— - - - 256 
 
 107, Rev. J F. to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - - 260 
 108 Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev. J F. - - - 261 
 
 109. Rev. J. F to Mrs Eliza Bennis - - * 265 
 
 110. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to the Rev. J : F. - - - 265 
 
 111. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to Major - - 269 
 
 112. Mrs. Eliza Bennis to - - - - 2 75 
 
 113. Mr. John M'Gregor to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 280 
 
 114. Mr. Richard Condy to Mrs Eliza Bennis - - 285 
 
 115. Mr. Richard Condy to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 287 
 
 116. Mr. Walter Griffith to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 289 
 
 117. Mr. Joseph Cr. to Mrs. Eliza Bennis - - 292 
 
 118. Mrs, Eliza Bennis to Mr. J. Cr 297 
 
 119. Mrs Eliza Bennis to Mr. - - . 299 
 
 A Wish - - - - - . - - 344 
 
 A Farewell to the World ... . - 547 
 
NOW preparing for the press ^ an ex* 
 tract from the journal of the late Mrs, Eliza 
 Bennisy from March 174t9 to March 1780....^/«- 
 mg a concise account of the dealings of God with 
 hery her trials, exercises, and deliverances^ includ-^ 
 ingsome remarkable circumstances of Providence y 
 to which will be added a short account of her last 
 sickness and Death, .^Intended to be published in 
 One Volume^ Duodecimo, about S5p pa^^s,,,. 
 Price, One Dollar^ Bound, 
 
500 5 
 
 8 
 
^x-' 
 
!iM^v*ti'l*miNi4iit*ith