PS 635 29 B898 Copy 1 NO PLAYS EXCHANGED Bugbee's Popular Plays ram Closing Day at Beanville School BY WILLIS N. BUGBEE Price 25 Cents The Willis N. Bugbee Co SYRACUSE, N. Y. Bugbee's Popular Plays Closing Day at Beanville School BY WILLIS N. BUGBEE Author of "Uncle Si and the Sunbeam Club/' " Jolly Dialogues," "Humorous Homespun Dialogues/' "Lively Dialogues," "Uncle Ephraim's Summer Boarders," "The Patriotic Peanut Stand," etc., etc. Copyright 1915, by Willis N. Bugbee The Willis N. Bugbee Co. SYRACUSE, N. Y. CLOSING DAY AT BEANVILLE SCHOOL CHARACTERS. The Teacher (an older girl) Pupils as follows : Henry Albert Mar* Peter Silas Jennie Sammy George Anna Joshua Minnie Susie Julia Dottie Other characters may be added if desired. The part of Dottie may be omitted when used only for intermediate chil- dren. COSTUMES. The costumes should be very plain — calico and gingham dresses for the girls, overalls and coarse clothing for the boys. Chairs and benches should be arranged to represent a school- room. Any additional songs, recitations, etc., may be introduced in the program to suit the occasion. The tune, 'Tor That Is All They Know" is found in "Merry Melodies" (price 15 cents). "Ho! Ho! Vacation Days Are Here" is found in "Nonabel Songster No. 1" (price 10 cents). Either one will be sent prepaid by the publishers of this book. OCT -7 1915 TMP92-008 CI.D 41992 Closing Day at Beanville School Scene: A school room. The children are discovered studying. Teacher. Well, children, you may lay aside your books. We will rehearse our pieces for the closing day exercises. We shall probably have a few visitors tomorrow so we must try to have them learned as well as we can. Sammy. Say, teacher, I know two that's coming — Miss Gowdy 'n' my ma. Peter. So's my ma comin' if she gets her bakin' done. You see pa don't have any work now days so all he does is eat and it keeps ma bakin' all the time. Susie. I guess my ma'll be here, too, if she gets her dress done. She's been turnin' her best alpaca so the rags won't show. Teacher. Well, never mind about telling your family af- fairs. I am sure they will all be welcome, and we must do our part to please them. (Sammy. I guess I'll do my part all right. Pa says I speak my piece just like one of them stage folks he heard down to the city last winter. Mary. Well, I guess you won't do any better'n what I do. My Aunt Jemima says I'd take first prize in a speakin' contest. Henry. Oh, gee! If there's goin' to be a prize I'll sit up all night and study mine. Teacher. Hush, children ! How can we ever rehearse our pieces when you keep up such a clatter. We can tell better after we have heard them. Peter may begin with the address of welcome. (Peter steps forward.) Peter. Dear friends and parents, everyone: We hate to see you here; — Teacher. What's that, Peter? 4 CLOSING DAY AT BEANVILLE SCHOOL Peter. Pshaw, I knew I'd say it wrong. I say it that way even time just 'cause that's what I'm thinking about. Teacher. Well, you shouldn't be thinking it, then you won't say it. Now try again. Peter. Dear friends and parents, every one: We hate — I mean — We're glad to see you here; We'll try our best to please you all, And keep you in good cheer. If some one should forget his piece, Or, maybe, skip a verse, The chances are that most of you Would do it ten times worse. Teacher. What's that last, Peter? Peter. Oh, gee! I keep forgetting and saying it the wrong way. Teacher. Well, you must be very careful and not say it that way tomorrow. Peter. Yes, mum, I'll try and remember not to forget. Teacher. Now try the last verse again, Peter. Peter. If some one should forget his piece, Or, maybe, skip a verse, Just let it pass, for don't you know, It might be ten times worse. (Nods awkwardly and takes his seat.) Teacher. That will do very well if you only keep your wits about you. Next is an instrumental piece by Joshua. (Joshua takes place at front and plays any popular tune on mouth organ j comb or any other instrument.) .CLOSING DAY AT BEANVILLE SCHOOL Joshua (stops playing). Please, ma'am, do I have to look toward the audience? Teacher. Why, of course, Joshua. Why shouldn't you? Joshua. 'Cause Henry Whipple keeps makin' me snicker. Teacher. Henry, if you don't behave yourself, I shall make you come and sit beside of me. Do you hear ? Henry. Well, I can't help it 'cause he looks just like pa does when he has the toothache. Teacher. Go on, Joshua, and if Henry bothers you again I'll give him something he isn't bargaining for. (JOSHUA finishes the tune, then takes his seat.) Teacher. Next will be Sammy Spinks' recitation. Now speak up good and loud, Sammy. Sammy. Yes, mum, I'll do the best I can. I've got a bad cold though. Caught it goin' in swimmin' yesterday with Dan Brooks. Teacher. Never mind how you caught it. Go on and speak your piece. Sammy. Yes, mum. {Recites.) Vacation Time. I'm glad vacation's come at last, An' lessons all are done; I've put my school-books all away, An' now, hurrah for fun! — For pickin' berries in the woods, An' swimmin' in the pool, For catchin' frogs an' fishin', too — Oh ho, good-bye to school! I've been to school for 'bout a year, I think that's 'most enough; My head's as full of knowledge now — As full as it will stuff, 6 CLOSING DAY AT BEANVILLE SCHOOL 'Till everything's all muddled up — I guess I've learned too much Of history and 'rifmetic, An' gogerfy an' such. My ma she read a story once — Not very long ago, About a boy that went to school, The same as me, you know, An' studied till it turned his brain As crazy as a loon, — An' gee! I think I'd better quit Or I'll get that way soon. (He makes awkward bow and takes seat.) Henry. My pa knew a man that did really get crazy from studyin' an' thought he was king of the Fiji islands. Mary. Well, I heard of a girl once that got blind from studying too much, and that's no joke either. Teacher. I don't think there's any danger of any of you ever getting crazy or of losing your sight from over-study, so you don't need to worry about that. Next is a dialogue "When I'm a Man." (Henry, Joshua, Albert, Silas and George take places at front and recite.) Henry. When I'm a man like popper is, I'm going to be a baker, The punkin pies that I shall make Will cover half an acre ; ■ My cookies will be 'most as big As grandma's pancake griddle; My tarts as big as wagon wheels With jelly in the middle. CLOSING DAY AT BEANVILLE SCHOOL Joshua. When I'm a man — a grown-up man, I'll be a candy-maker, And have a shop ten stones high, Next door beside the baker, And every day or twice a day I'll make a ton of candy, Of chocolates and caramels And Jackson balls so dandy. , Albert. When I'm a man, so big and strong, I'll be a jolly sailor — A captain of a tug of war, A submarine or whaler; I'll sail upon the ocean blue, In every kind of weather, And jolly times we'll have, yo ho! My crew and I together. Silas. George. When I'm a man 'most six feet tall, I'm going to be a barber; I'll build a shop all for myself 'Way down in Boston harbor. And when the ships come into port, You'll hear the sailors holler; I'll cut their hair and shave 'em, too, For only half a dollar. When I'm a man, a great big man, I guess I'll be a tailor, And make all sorts of nobby clothes For the baker and the sailor. (To audience.) And if you, too, would like a suit, I'll try to fit your measure; CLOSING DAY AT BEANVILLE SCHOOL I'll make them in the latest style, For business or for pleasure. All. When we are men and wear long pants, We're going to do some wonders; We'll each one try to make our mark, And maybe make some blunders. No matter what our trades may be — On land or on the ocean — You'll always find the saying true: "Each person to his notion." (All pass awkwardly to seats.) Minnie. Say, teacher, I know what I'm going to be when I get to be a man — Several. A man ? Ho ! ho ! ho ! When she gets to be a man ! Minnie. I mean when I get to be a woman. I'm going to be a school teacher. I bet I'll make the kids mind. Peter. I'm going to be a banker, then I can handle bushels of money. Teacher. Well, you've got plenty of time to think about it. We can't stop to discuss it now. Next is a recitation by Mary. ( This may be a costume recitation or not, as desired. The costume should consist of an old-fashioned dress worn over a hoop-skirt. In such case Mary may raise her hand just previous to the boys' dialogue, and at the signal from the teacher leaves the room. This will give time for the change.) L Mary (recites). When Aunt Melinda' Went to School. When Aunt Melinda Wigglesworth Was young and went to school, She says she had to "ante-round" And mind the teacher's rule. CLOSING DAY AT BEANVILLE SCHOOL 9 • I guess they had the funniest ways That ever you did see, And one of the things that puzzled them Was the funny "rule of three." They sat on benches made of wood, With backs straight up and down, {Indicates shape of desk with hand.) And the old box-stove they had to use Would almost bake you brown. And every day they toed the crack When they stood up to spell, {Motion of toeing crack.) Oh, dear! The funniest things they did, I couldn't begin to tell. The girls all wore their skirts like this, {Stretches skirt out on each side.) With hoop-skirts big and wide, Like pictures in the picture books That bulge out on each side. But lots of fun they used to have, My Aunt Melinda says, When she was 5'oung and went to school — But my! What funny ways! {A courtesy may be made, if desired, as she takes seat.) Silas. Say, teacher, I guess if they wore dresses big as that now days we'd have to* have an addition built on the school house, wouldn't we? George. Well, I should say it was a funny way to keep school. Teacher. Next is a song by Minnie, Susie and Julia. {Girls step to front and sing to tune of "For That Is All They Know.") 10 CLOSING DAY AT BEANVILLE SCHOOL Minnie. Our teacher asked us all one day What study we liked best, * And I, of course, chose history Ahead of all the rest, Because I know the dates so well, Which I can prove to you. Susie and Julia. Then tell us when the Pilgrims came. Minnie. In fourteen-ninety-two. (Susie and Julia laugh and continue to giggle as they sing the chorus.) Chorus. In fourteen-ninety-two, In fourteen-ninety-two, She says the Pilgrims landed here In fourteen-ninety-two. Susie {singing). And when she asked which one I liked, I said "Arithmetic." I know my tables all by heart And do my sums so quick, — There's six times six is thirty-six, That's easy 'nough to do, — Minnie and Julia. But nine times nine, please tell us that. Susie (counting on fingers). I — I guess it's sixty-two. (Minnie and Julia giggle as they sing chorus.) She says it's sixty-two, She says it's sixty-two, She knows her tables all by heart, But says it's sixty-two. CLOSING DAY AT BEANVILLE SCHOOL Tulia (singing). , And when it came my turn to choose, I chose geography, Because I know where all the states And where the cities be. Minnie and Susie. Then tell us where is Vera Cruz. JULIA, f TVT • Upon the coast of Maine. Minnie and Susie. _ T . k . iphl? And where, oh where, is Timbuctu f Julia. . . The capital of Spain. (Minnie aw/ Susie giggle as before.) The capital of Spain, The capital of Spain, She says— ho! ho! that Timbuctu Is capital of Spain. (They take seats.) ,. Anna. I think that's an awful silly piece 'cause anybody d know the Pilgrims didn't come over with Columbus. ' Mary. Or that Vera Cruz isn't in Maine, either. Tennie. Or that nine time nine isn't— Teacher. Well, do be quiet, children, or well never get through. Anna may read her composition next. (Anna steps forward, unfolds paper and reads) : Vacations. I think vacations are just splendid-next to Christmas and Thanksgiving and Fourth of July. All the trouble is they don IrToften enough. My pa says vacations are so folks caij g the kinks straightened outer their brains 1 guess Uncie Charlev's brain must be awful kinky 'cause he ain't had a vaca- riont 17 years, but there's Mr. Podger that lives near us, he s 12 CLOSING DAY AT BEANVILLE SCHOOL been having vacation ever since I can remember, and pa says he was having vacation when he was a boy. Last vacation I went down to my grandpa's and staid 'most all summer and if ma'll let me I'm going again this year. We had lots of fun — Johnny Brown and me. You see, Johnny's a little boy that lives on a farm next to grandpa's. Henry. Ho! ho! That's why she goes to her grandpa's — to see Johnny Brown. Anna. 'Tain't neither — so there! Teacher. Henry, I want you should keep still and let Anna finish her composition. Anna {reading). We used to feed the chickens and ducks and turkeys and gooses, and we used to ride on the loads of hay, and once Johnny fell off and hit on his funny bone, but it wasn't so funny 'cause he couldn't use it again for most three days. Then sometimes we picked huckleberries and gooseberries, but the gooseberries didn't grow on the gooses. They growed on bushes. I couldn't begin to tell all the nice things we did, but if anybody wants to spend a perfectly lovely vacation let them go to their grandpa's. That's all. {Takes seat.) Mary. Well, I haven't got any grandpa, but I'm going to my Aunt Hattie's, over to Greenville and — Susie. And I'm going to my big sister's. She got the cutest little baby — and just think — I'm its aunt! Isn't that funny? Julia. Well, you needn't think you're going to have all the fun 'cause — Teacher. Children, do keep still. How do you think we can go on with this program with so much clatter. Dottie, you may speak your piece now. Dottie {recites) : I am a tiny little girl, Just five years old, you see; I love to ride to Boston town Upon my papa's knee; CLOSING DAY AT BEANVILLE SCHOOL 13 I love to help my mamma cook And bake and everything; I love to make the music go, And then I love to sing. (Sings stanza of any child song.) I love to go to school, I do, And learn my A-B-C's, And if you think I do not know, Just listen to me, please. (Speaks quickly accenting capitals.) A, b, C, d, E, f, G; H, i, J, k, L, m, N, o, P; Q, r, S, t, U and V; Double u and X and Y and Z. There! (Points triumphantly to audience and skips to seat.) Silas. Say, teacher, I know a piece my Uncle Jim teached me. Teacher. Very well, you may speak it and we'll see what it is. Silas (recites) : Onae there was a man that lived. Beside a marshy pool, And every night the frogs would come" And hold their singing school. The bull frog was the leader bold ; H,e'd give the note, "Cra-donk!" (in coarse voice.) Then all the other frogs would join, "Cra-donk! Cra-donk! Cra-donk!" (in finer voice.) They kept it up all summer long, From early spring till fall, 14 CLOSING DAY AT BEANVILLE SCHOOL Till everyone had learned their notes, The big frogs and the small. And every night that man would sit / 1 And hear the froggies croak, And then he'd vow unto himself That every frog he'd choke. And day by day he madder grew, Till in his sore vexation, He'd often say, "You pesky fools, Why don't you take vacation?" Henry. Ho! ho! ho! The frogs take a vacation! Teacher. Jennie may now give the closing address. You may read it if you haven't it all learned. Jennie. Oh, I've got it learned all right. I sat up till half past nine last night a~learnin' of it. Teacher. Very well, you may go ahead. Jennie {going to front). Dear Friends and Feller Citizens: We've — Teacher. Why, Jennie! That isn't right. Jennie. Oh, dear ! I hope I won't forget tomorrow. Dear Friends and Parents: We've enjoyed your pres- ence here very much today and we've tried to do the very best we could to entertain you. We notice that nobody got up and went home and nobody went to sleep, so we think we've done pretty well. We're glad it's all over with 'cause now we're going to have a good long vacation and we hope you will all have just as pleasant a one as we expect to have. Good-bye. Silae. Gee! She spoke it right off just as if she was makin' it up as she went along — "Johnny on the spot." CLOSING DAY AT BEANVILLE SCHOOL 15 Teacher. Well, children, I think you've all done first-rate and I hope you will do as well tomorrow. We will all sing the closing song now. (Any appropriate song may be used, such as "Hoi Ho! Vaca- tion Days Are Here!" etc.) Curtain i..™£ RY 0F CONGRESS III 016 102 545 8 §