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TRAVELS
INTO SEVERAL
REMOTE NATIONS OF THE WORLD,
IN FOUR PARTS.
BY LEMUEL GULLIVER,
VIRST A SURGEON AND THEN A CAPTAIN Of several SHIPS
SPLENDIDE MENDAX.-HOR.
WITH COPIOUS NOTES, AND
A LIFE OF THE AUTHOR.
By W. C. TAYLOR, LL.D.,
OF TRINITY COLLEGE, Dublin.
NEW YORK,
"
SIEGEL, COOPER CO
CHICAGO,
Hubbard
IMAG. Voy.
PR
3724
G8
189-g
Rare Book Room
Gift
Lik, Hubbard
13-13-27
PREFACE.
THROUGH the kindness of the Rev. Charles Bathurst Wood-
man, the editor is enabled to offer to the reader some interesting
documents respecting the original publication of Gulliver's
Travels which have not been hitherto made public. In the Life
of Swift, it has been stated that these Travels were originally de-
signed to form part of a Satire on the Abuse of Human Learning,
projected by Swift, Pope, and Arbuthnot conjointly. The plan
of the work was probably suggested by the celebrated treatise
of Ludovicus Vives, "De Abusu Literarum," and Lucian's True
History; and the part of it completed on the original design
was published as the Memoirs of Martinus Scriblerus. In the
notes to this edition, it has been stated that the first hint of
these Travels appears in Scriblerus, also that the pedantic
Martin was originally designed to be the hero of the tale, and
that Pope was by no means pleased when the erudite scholar
was supplanted by the plain, sturdy seaman, Lemuel Gulliver.
Having so far deviated from the original plan, Swift perceived
that he had a favorable opportunity for assailing his political
enemies under the guise of fictitious characters: his own dis-
appointments were aggravated by the sufferings of his friend
Bishop Atterbury, who had been exiled by an act of attainder,
-a measure of questionable justice at all times, and in this
instance equally harsn and unnecessary. The notes will show
that Swift fully availed himself of the opportunity.
When the work was completed, he appears to have become
alarmed, and anxious to conceal his authorship, for the minis
ters of the day had shown little scruple in the use of means for
crushing a political adversary, and the law of libel was admin-
istered with more than ordinary severity. Some of the arti-
fices which the Dean employed to save himself from the Attor
ney-General are mentioned in the Life; we shall now show
that he at first kept his secret from his publisher. The follow
8
PREFACE.
ing is the letter which was sent with the MS. when it was of
fered for publication.
(COPY.)
FOR MR. Motte.
London, August 8th, 1726.
SIR: My cousin, Mr. Lemuel Gulliver, intrusted me some years ago with a copy of his
Travels; whereof that which I here send you is about a fourth part, for I shortened them
very much, as you will find in my preface to the reader. I have shown them to several
persons of great judgment and distinction, who are confident they will sell very well. And
although some parts of this and the following volumes, may be thought in one or two places
to be a little satirical, yet it is agreed they will give no offence, but in that you must judge
for yourself, and take the advice of your friends, and if they or you be of another opinion,
you may let me know it when you return these papers, which I expect shall be in three days
at furthest. The good report I have received of you makes me put so great a trust into
your hands, which I hope you will give me no reason to repent, and in that confidence, I
require that you will never suffer these papers to be once out of your sight.
As the printing these Travels will probably be of great value to you, so as a manager
for my friend and cousin, I expect you will give a due consideration for it, because
I know the author intends the profit for the use of poor seamen, and I am advised to say,
that two hundred pounds is the feast sum I will receive on his account; but if it shall happen
that the sale will not answer as I expect and believe, then whatever shall be thought too
much, even upon your own word, shall be duly repaid.
Perhaps you may think this a strange way of proceeding to a man of trade, but since I
} egin with so great a trust to you whom I never saw, I think it not hard that you should
trust me as much; therefore if, after three days reading and consulting these papers, you
think it proper to stand to my agreement, you may begin to print them, and the subsequent
parts shall be all sent you, one after another, in less than a week, provided that immediately.
upon your resolution to print them, you do within three days, deliver a bank bill of two
hundred pounds, wrapped up so as to make a parcel, to the hand from whence you receive
this, who will come in the same manner exactly at nine o'clock on Thursday, which will be
the 11th instant.
If you do not approve of this proposal, deliver these papers to the person who will come
on Thursday.
If you choose rather to send the papers, make no other proposal of your own, but just
barely write on a piece of paper that you do not accept my offer.
I am, Sir, your humble servant,
Richard SyMPSON.
On a slip of paper which seems to have been inclosed in
the preceding letter, the following postscript appears:
To MR. MOTTE, August 13th, 1726.
P.S.-I would have both volumes come out together, and published by Christmas at
furthest.
R. SYMPSON.
It appears that this communication was made through Mr.
Erasmus Lewis, who was intimately connected with Atterbury,
and that neither Pope, Gay, nor Arbuthnot were admitted into
the secret, though some intimation of it was conveyed to Lord
Bolingbroke. Mr Motte's answer to the proposal, though very
business-like, leads to a suspicion that he had penetrated the
secret, or at least that he guessed the unknown author to be a
person of some importance.
(Copy of Mr. MOTTE's reply to SYMPSON's first proposal.)
SIR: I return you your papers with a great many thanks, and do assure you, that since
they have been in my custody I have faithfully deserved the good opinion you expressed of
my integrity, but you were much mistaken in the estimate you made of my abilities when
you supposed me able in vacation time (the most dead season of the year), at so short notice
PREFACE,
o deposit so considerable a sum as 200. By delivering the papers to the bearer, I have
put you entirely in the same condition you were in before I saw them, but if you will trust
my promise, or accept any security you can contrive or require for the payment of the money
in six months, I will comply with any method you shall purpose. In the meantime I shall
trust to your honor, and promise that what shall appear to be more than the success of it
deserves shall be repaid, as you may depend upon a proper acknowledgment, if the success
answers or exceeds expectation. I have only to add, that before I received your letter, I
had fixed a journey into the country, and wrote to some dealers there to appoint times when
I should call upon them, so that I shall be obliged to set out this day sennight at farthest;
therefore if you think fit to favor me with any further correspondence, desire I may hear
from you as soon as possible.
A considerable delay appears to have intervened, the cause
of which is not explained, but it probably arose from Swift's
caution, and fear of Walpole's vengeance. His next letter is
dated in the spring of the following year. Mr. C. B. Woodman
has compared it with other letters of Swift in his possession,
and believes it to have been written by the Dean, though in a
feigned hand.
(COPY.)
These for MR. MOTTE, a Bookseller at the Middle Temple Gate, în Fleet Street.
MR. MOTTE: I sent this inclosed by a friend to be sent to you, to desire that you would
go to the house of Erasmus Lewis, in Cork Street, behind Burlington House, and let him
know that you are come from me; for to the said Mr. Lewis I have given full power to
treat concerning my cousin Gulliver's book, and whatever he and you shall settle, I will
consent to; so I have written to him. You will see him best early in the morning.
I am your humble servant,
April 27th, 1727.
RICHARD SYmpson.
Mr. Motte seems to have lost no time in bringing the
engagement to a close, for on the same sheet with the fore
going is the following memorandum in another handwriting.
LONDON, May 4th, 1727.—I am fully satisfied. E. LEWIS.
The following fragment of another letter on the same sub-
ject shows that the bookseller was anxious to comply with all
the requisitions of the author. The beginning is lost.
That the book shall be published within a month after I receive the copy, and if the
success will allow it I will punctually pay the money you require in six months. I shall
thankfully embrace the offer. The bearer stays for an answer, so that I can only offer a
proposal without assigning a reason.
These documents were preserved by Charles Bathurst, Esq.,
the grandfather of the Rev. Charles Bathurst Woodman, who
was originally in partnership with Mr. Benjamin Motte. The
Rev. C. B. Woodman, on seeing this new edition of Gulliver's
Travels, proffered the copies of these interesting documents
to the editor, though personally unknown to him, and the
editor takes this opportunity of publicly expressing his thanks
for so valuable an addition to Literary History.
10
PREFACE.
Of the editor's own share in this work little need be said.
Many years ago, when studying English History, he obtained
access to a valuable collection of books and pamphlets relating
to the reigns of Anne and the first two Georges, belonging to
a late prelate of the Church of Ireland. Amongst these was
a copy of Gulliver's Travels with MS. notes, identifying some
of the characters. These were copied by permission, and at a
subsequent period it became a source of amusement to extend
and verify them.
In compiling the life of Swift, the editor has not disguised
his want of affection for the character of this hero; but though
anable to make the biography a eulogy, he has endeavored that
at should not become a philippic. There are good points in the
worst men, and bad in the best. Human life is the acted
allegory of Beauty and the Beast.
W. C. T.
LONDON.
CONTENTS
PREFACE,
LIFE OF SWIFT,
THE PUBLISHER TO THE READER,
A LETTER FROM CAPTAIN GULLIVER TO HIS COUSIN SYMPSON,
A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT.
PAGE.
7
17
51
53
CHAPTER I.
The Author gives some Account of Himself and family-His first Inducements to
Travel-He is shipwrecked, and swims for his Life-Gets safe on Shore in the
Country of Lilliput-Is made a Prisoner, and carried up the Country,
57
CHAPTER II.
The Emperor of Lilliput, attended by several of the Nobility, comes to see the Author
in his Confinement-The Emperor's Person and Habit described-Learned Men
appointed to teach the Author their Language-He gains Favor by his Mild
Disposition-His Pockets are searched, and his Sword and Pistols taken from
him,
68
CHAPTER III.
The Author diverts the Emperor, and his Nobility of both sexes, in a very uncom
mon manner-The Diversions of the Court of Lilliput described
described - The
Author has his liberty granted him upon certain conditions,
76
CHAPTER IV.
Milendo, the Metropolis of Lilliput, described, together with the Emperors. Palace-
A conversation between the Author and a principal Secretary, concerning the af
fairs of that Empire-The Author offers to serve the Emperor in his wars,
84
CHAPTER V.
The Author, by an extraordinary stratagem, prevents an invasion-A high Title of
Honor is conferred upon him-Ambassadors arrive from the Emperor of Blefuscu
and sue for Peace-The Empress's Apartments on Fire by accident; the Author
instrumental in saving the rest of the Palace,
89
CHAPTER VI.
Of the Inhabitants of Lilliput; their Learning, Laws, and Customs; the manner of
educating their children-The Author's way of living in that Country-His Vm
dication of a great Lady,
95
to
CONTENTS.
CHAPTER VII.
The Author, being informed of a design to accuse him of High Treason, makes his
Escape to Blefuscu-His Reception there,
104
CHAPTER VIII.
The Author, by a lucky accident, finds means to leave Blefuscu; and, after some dit.
ficulties, returns safe to his Native Country,
112
APPENDIX TO THE VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT,
DDE TO QUINBUS FLESTRIN, BY TITTY TIT, ESQ.
A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAG.
•
119
126
CHAPTER I.
A great Storm described; the Longboat sent to fetch Water, the Author goes with it
to discover the Country-He is left on Shore, is seized by one of the Natives,
and carried to a Farmer's House-His reception, with several accidents that
happened there~A description of the Inhabitants,
• 129
CHAPTER II.
A description of the Farmer's Daughter-The Author carried to a Market Town, and
thence to the Metropolis-The particulars of his Journey,
140
CHAPTER III.
The Author sent for to Court-The Queen buys him of his Master the Farmer, and
presents him to the King-He disputes with his Majesty's great Scholars-An
Apartment at Court provided for the Author-He is in high favor with the
Queen-He stands up for the honor of his own Country-His Quarrels with the
Queen's Dwarf,
145
CHAPTER IV.
The Country described-A proposal for correcting modern Maps-The King's Palace,
and some account of the Metropolis-The Author's way of Travelling-The
Chief Temple described,
154
CHAPTER V.
Several Adventures that happened to the Author-The Execution of a Criminal--
The Author shows his skill in Navigation,
158
CHAPTER VL
Several contrivances of the Author to please the King and Queen-He shows his
skill in Music-The King inquires into the state of England, which the Author
relates to him-The King's Observations thereon,
166
CHAPTER VIL
The Author's love of his Country-He makes a proposal of much advantage to the
King, which is rejected-The King's great ignorance in Politics-The Learning
of that Country very imperfect and confined-The Laws and Military Affairs
and parties in the State,
176
CONTENTS.
13
CHAPTER VIII.
The King and Queen make a progress to the Frontiers-The Author attends them-
The manner in which he leaves the Country very particularly related-He returns
to England,
181
THE LAMENTATION OF GLUMDALCLITCH FOR THE LOSS OF GRILDRIG,
A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, ETC.
192
CHAPTER I.
The Author sets out on his Third Voyage-Is taken by Pirates-The malice of a
Dutchman-His arrival at an Island-He is received in Laputa,
195
CHAPTER IL
The Humors and Disposition of the Laputians described-An account of their Learn
ing-Of the King and his Court-The Author's Reception there-The Inhabitants
subject to Fear and Disquietude-An account of the Women,
200
CHAPTER III.
A Phenomenon solved by modern Philosophy and Astronomy-The Laputians' great
Improvements in the latter-The King's method of suppressing Insurrections, 207
CHAPTER IV.
The Author Leaves Laputa-Is conveyed to Balnibarbi-Arrives at the Metropolis-
A description of the Metropolis and of the Country adjoining-The Author hos
pitably received by a great Lord-His conversation with that Lord,
211
CHAPTER V.
The Author permitted to see the Grand Academy of Lagado-The Academy largely
described-The Arts wherein the Professors employ themselves,
21)
CHAPTER VIII,
A farther account of Glubbdubdrib-Ancient and modern History corrected,
CHAPTER VI.
A farther account of the Academy-The Author proposes some Improvements, which
are honorably received,
225
CHAPTER VIL
The Author Leaves Lagado-Arrives at Maldonada-No Ship ready-He takes a
short Voyage to Glubbdubdrib-His Reception by the Governor,
231
235
CHAPTER IX.
The Author returns to Maldonada-Sails to the Kingdom of Luggnagg-The Author
confined-He is sent for to Court-The marner of his admittance-The King's
great Lenity to his subjects,
240
14
CONTENTS.
CHAPTER X.
The Luggnaggians commended-A particular Description of the Struldbrugs, with
many conversations between the Author and some eminent Persons upon that
subject,
243
CHAPTER XI.
The Author Leaves Luggnagg, and sails to Japan-From thence he returns in a
Dutch ship to Amsterdam, and from Amsterdam to England,
250
APPENDIX.
د
BALLAD ON THE SOUTH SEA SCHEME,
A SOUTH SEA BALLAD,
UPON THE HORRID PLOT DISCOVERED BY HARLEQUIN, THE
BISHOP OF ROCHESTER'S FRENCH DOG,
A VOYAGE TO THE COUNTRY OF THE.
HOUYHNHNMS.
255
261
264
CHAPTER I.
The Author sets out as Captain of a Ship-His Men conspire against him, confine
him a long time to his Cabin, and set him on Shore in an unknown Land-He
travels up into the Country-The Yahoos, a strange sort of Animal, described-
The Author meets two Houyhnhnms,
267
CHAPTER II.
The Author conducted by a Houyhnhnm to his House-The House described- The
Author's Reception-The Food of the Houyhnhnms-The Author in distress for
want of Meat-Is at last relieved-His manner of Feeding in this Country, 273
CHAPTER III.
The Author studies to learn the Language-The Houyhnhnm, his Master, assists
in teaching him-The Language described-Several Houyhnhnms of quality come
out of curiosity to see the Author-He gives his Master a short Account of his
Voyage,
278
CHAPTER IV.
The Houyhnhnm's notion of Truth and Falsehood-The Author's Discourse disap
proved by his Master-The Author gives a more particular account of himself,
and the accidents of his Voyage,
283
CHAPTER V.
The Author, at his Master's command, informs him of the State of England-The
causes of War among the Princes of Europe-The Author begins to explain the
English Constitution,
287
↓
CHAPTER VI.
A continuation of the State of England under Queen Anne-the Character of a first
Minister of State in European Courts,
293
•
CONTENTS.
15
CHAPTER VII.
he Author's great love of his native Country-His Master's Observations upon the
Constitution and Administration of England, as described by the Author, with
parallel cases and comparisons His Master's Observations upon Human
Nature,
299
CHAPTER VIII.
The Author relates several particulars of the Yahoos-The great Virtues of the
Houyhnhnms-The Education and Exercise of their Youth-Their General
Assembly,
303
纛
​CHAPTER IX.
A grand Debate at the General Assembly of the Houyhnhnms, and how it was de
termined-The Learning of the Houyhnhnms- Their Buildings-Their manner
of Burials-The defectiveness of their Language,
311
CHAPTER X.
The Author's Economy and happy Life among the Houyhnhnms-His great im
provement in Virtue by conversing with them-Their Conversations-The Author
has notice given him by his Master, that he must depart from the Country-He
falls into a Swoon for grief, but submits-He contrives and finishes a Canoe
by the help of a fellow-servant, and puts to Sea at a venture,
315
CHAPTER XI.
The Author's dangerous Voyage--He arrives at New Holland, hoping to settle ther
-Is wounded with an Arrow by one of the Natives-Is seized and carried by
force into a Portuguese Ship-The great civilities of the Captain-The Author
arrives in England,
322
CHAPTER XII.
The Author's Veracity-His design in Publishing this Work-His Censure of those
Travellers who swerve from the truth-The Author clears himself from any
sinister ends in Writing-An objection answered-The method of plantingColonies
-His native Country commended-The right of the Crown to those countries
described by the Author is justified-The difficulty of conquering them-The
Author takes his last leave of the Reader; proposes his manner of living for the
future; gives good advice, and concludes,
3a8
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
LIVES of Swift are so numerous that it may seem equally
superfluous and presumptuous to add another to their number,
especially as the diligence of former biographers has left few
new materials to be collected, and scarcely any new conjec
tures to be hazarded. There is, however, perhaps, no person
whose life is so full of interest and instruction to literary as-
pirants, so replete with encouragement to pursue a course of
honorable industry, and so rife with examples of the perils
that attend every abandonment of principle. Born in ob-
scurity and almost in destitution-educated by the precarious
charity of relations-sent from his university with no honor,
and some disgrace-employed as secretary by a statesman pos-
sessing no patronage, and yet exacting more than the ordinary
homage of a patron, Swift's early years exhibit nothing but the
humiliation of genius, and the sickness of heart arising from.
hopes deferred. Yet, by steady exertion of talent he won his
way forward, and at a remarkable crisis saw himself courted
and honored by all the leaders of parties, who divided the
power of England. In the classic reign of Anne, wit and
nobility shared public influence between them; the pen of
Addison was not less valuable to his party than the sword of
Marlborough, and Bolingbroke most sufficiently supported his
cabinet in his study.
At the very moment that the Whigs had "burned them-
selves while trying to roast a parson," and had lost the con-
fidence of Queen and people, Swift, who had hitherto been
their vehement supporter, went over at once to the Tories, and
¿ssailed his old allies with all the rancor of a renegade. He
became politically powerful, and morally powerless; dreaded
by all, loved by few, respected by none. His new patrons
dared not pay the price which he expected for his desertion ;
they shelved him in the deanery of St. Patrick, and ere long
18
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
their removal from power seemed to consign him to hopeless
obscurity.
Having vainly tried to sell himself once more, Swift vowed
vengeance on those who rejected his offer. A proposal for a
copper coinage gave him an opportunity of convulsing his
country; he roused the passions of an excitable people by a
system of audacious misrepresentation, and was rewarded by
an extent of popularity which at that time was unprecedented.
in Ireland. He had thus organized an immense power, capa-
ble of producing great results; he employed it merely to harass'
an obnoxious ministry and to lacerate some semi-obscure indi-
viduals who had provoked his resentment. The power dwindled
away from desuetude; disappointed ambition nurtured a ten-
dency to misanthropy which the feelings of dependence in
early life had formed, the mind yielded to the corrosion of the
heart.
And Swift expired, a changeling and a show.
His private life was no less' extraordinary. He felt the
passion of love with the same force and keenness said to be
experienced by Eastern guardians of the harem, and like them
he displayed all the acerbity and inconsistency incidental to
their unfortunate position. At one time he spiritualized his
passion to a more shadowy tenuity than had yet been attained
in the dreams of Platonism; and again, he passed into the
wildest excesses of the opposite extreme, and wallowed in the
filth of the most disgusting obscenity. Yet, three lovely and
amiable women bestowed their affections upon him; and two
were the victims of his caprices and his selfishness. Unhappy
himself, and the cause of unhappiness to those he loved most
dearly, private life afforded the Dean no consolation for the
disappointments of his public career; if at one time he showed
that true genius cannot be crushed by misfortune, at another
he proved that fame can only be preserved by continued ex-
ertion. His entire career teaches that political influence is
only valuable when beneficially extended, and that renown
will never give comfort to the soul, unless the applause from
without is seconded by self-approval from within."
I.
JONATHAN SWIFT was descended from a younger branch
of the Swift family in the county of York. His father was
the sixth or seventh son of the Rev. Thomas Swift, vicar of
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
19
Goderich, and was bred to the profession of an attorney. The
extensive confiscations in Ireland consequent on the civil wars
of 1641, and subsequently ratified by the Acts of Settlement
and Explanation, had transferred a vast amount of Irish prop-
erty to English companies and land-owners, who were com-
pelled to employ agents in the management of their new
estates. These agencies were very lucrative; they laid the
foundation of the fortunes of many families, such as that of
the Beresfords, which have since been added to the ranks of
the nobility. Swift, through the interest of some family con-
nection obtained one of these profitable employments and re-
moved to Dublin; but before he could derive much advantage
from the employment, he died, leaving a pregnant widow with
very slender provision.
Jonathan Swift, the child thus before birth deprived of a
parent's care, was born in Dublin, at a small house in Hoey's
Court, which is still shown by the residents in the neighbor-
hood. The day of his birth was November 30th, 1667, an
anniversary which, to the close of his life, he observed as a
day of fasting and sadness, never failing to read the third
chapter of the book of Job on each of its successive returns.
Richard Brennan,* the servant in whose arms he died, stated
that one of the few instances of a lucid interval during his
fatal malady was a glimmering consciousness of his birthday,
which he showed by frequently repeating when it came round,
"Let the day perish wherein I was born, and the night in
which it was said there is a man-child conceived."
Mrs. Swift was supported by her brother-in-law, Godwin
Swift, who undertook the education of his nephew; but while
the boy was yet an infant, a singular event removed him for a
time from the care of his uncle and mother. The nurse who
had him in charge was a native of Whitehaven; on the death
of a relation she succeeded to a small legacy, which required
her presence in England; she was so fondly attached to the
infant that she stole him away from his mother, and carried
him across the Channel. His delicate health, and the diffi-
culty of procuring a passage in those days, prevented his being
sent back for more than three years. When he returned to
Dublin, it appeared that his nurse had taken extraordinary
pains with his education, for though barely five years of age,
he could spell tolerably, and read a little in the Bible.
Richard Brennan survived his master many years; a pension was paid him by Mr. G.
M. Berkeley, through the hands of T. King, Sr., commissioner in London for the Iri
courts of law; and to his kindness I am indebted for this interesting anecdote.
20
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
At the age of six years, Swift was sent to the school of Kil-
kenny, a collegiate establishment founded by the Ormond
family, and always among the best regulated of the endowed
schools of Ireland. A desk on which. Swift carved his name
with a penknife is still shown to visitors at Kilkenny.
In his fourteenth year Swift entered the University of Dub-
lin; it appears from the registers that he entered as a pensioner
under St. George Ashe, on the 24th of April, 1682. His cousin,
Thomas Swift, entered at the same time, and the two Swifts
appearing on the registers without their Christian names,
created some confusion, which, however, has been in a great
degree dispelled by the patient industry of the late Dr. Barrett.
Swift's career as a student was not very creditable to him.
He showed an invariable repugnance to logic, which was then
the favored science, and a thorough contempt for the sophisms
of Smiglecius, Keckermannus, and Burgersdicius; grave au-
thorities in their day, but now scarcely known by name.
From
his neglect of collegiate studies Swift had no chance of obtain-
ing honors; he did not even acquire the limited information
necessary to graduate, and only obtained his degree of Bachelor
of Arts by special favor, a term used in Dublin to designate
want of merit. Swift remained three years longer in the uni-
versity, and formed one of a clique remarkable for their irregu-
larities and breaches of collegiate discipline. Their disorders
brought upon them the censure of the heads of the university,"
which they retorted by lampoons of more bitterness than wit.
For one of these breaches of decorum, Swift was severely ad-
monished, and compelled to beg pardon of the dean, Dr. Allen,
on his knees; this degradation was keenly felt, and more than
twenty years afterwards Swift introduced a philippic against Dr.
Allen into his attack on Lord Berkeley's administration of the
Irish government. Amid these follies, Swift formed a taste for
the peculiar style of satire in which he subsequently became
so famous. Before leaving college he showed his first sketch.
of the "Tale of a Tub " to Mr. Waring, his chum, or chamber-
fellow, a gentleman with whose family he at one time designed
to form a more tender connection. He became acquainted with
his chum's sister, Miss Waring, and either fancied or formed
an attachment, which circumstances prevented him from dis-
closing at the time.
AR
On the death of his uncle Godwin, Swift was left without
resources; but another uncle, Dryden William Swift, came to
his aid, and though he had not much in his power to bestow,
the benevolence of his nature and the tenderness of his mannet
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
2.
enhanced the value of his gifts. The son of this kind uncle,
Willoughby Swift, was a merchant in Lisbon, and generously
contributed to the support of his cousin. Many years after-
wards, the Dean of St. Patrick's used to relate an incident in
his college life, of which Willoughby was the hero, with grate-
ful acknowledgments of well-timed generosity.
He was sitting despondingly in his rooms, contemplating the
college picture of misery-a scanty library, a naked board, and
an empty purse-when his attention was roused by some noise
in the court; he looked out and saw a foreign-looking sailor
apparently inquiring his way to the apartments of some stu-
dent, and probably perplexed by the waggeries for which the
undergraduates of Dublin were long famous. It suddenly came
into his head that this might possibly be the bearer of a mes-
sage from his cousin Willoughby; no improbable conjecture,
for Ireland had at the time a considerable, foreign trade with
Spain and Portugal. He immediately hastened down, and
found that he had guessed aright. The stranger came with him
to his room, produced a well-stocked purse, presented it as an
offering from his cousin Willoughby, and refused to receive any
portion of its contents as a reward.
Under the circumstances in which Swift was placed, a small
sum of money usually leads to extravagance, while the acquisi-
tion of a large sum generally leads to habits of economy, if
not of parsimony. Such was the effect produced on Swift; he
became very prudent in money matters, and perhaps niggardly,
a character which he maintained to the end of his life.
The year 1688 was one of painful anxiety to Ireland; the
fate of the Protestant Church and of the forfeited estates hung
in the balance. The success of James II. would have given
ascendency to the Latin Church, and the Irish lands to the
heirs of the old proprietors; nor was it at all clear that William
III. would not have made a compromise with the Irish party,
as he at first offered, which would have closed the doors of
preferment against English adventurers and their descendants.
Swift saw the danger; he accordingly left Dublin, and came
over to England on a visit to his mother, who then resided in
Leicestershire. Mrs. Swift, whose own means of support were
precarious, could do nothing for her son, but she recommended
him to seek the advice and patronage of Sir William Temple,
who had married one of her relations. Temple was a profound
statesman, an accomplished scholar, and an experienced cour
tier; he was not therefore likely to be prepossessed in favor
of a raw Irish student, who was hitherto known only for his
22
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
irregularities and his deficiency of information; he took Swift
into his service, but for some time showed him no marks of
confidence or affection. The two years, however, which the
young man spent with Sir William Temple at Moor Park, laid
the foundation of his future fortunes; he became a diligent
student, devoting eight hours every day to an extensive course
of reading: but it is probable that he gained still more valuable
information from the accomplished diplomatist, who had taken
an active share in all the important negotiations between the
Restoration and the Revolution. Hence arises the marked
difference between Swift's political pamphlets and those pub-
lished by any other man of letters: they argue only on what
appears on the public stage: he, on the other hand, manifests
an intimate familiarity with the machinery behind the scenes;
they wrote as spectators, he as an actor.
His severe studies injured Swift's health; a severe attack
of indigestion brought on fits of giddiness united to deafness,
and he continued subject to them for the rest of life. He
was persuaded to try his native air, but deriving no benefit from
a short visit to Dublin, he returned to Moor Park and resumed
his studies.
Temple introduced Swift to King William, who often came
to visit the statesman in his retirement. The monarch was at-
tended by Swift when he walked in the garden, but the only
result from these interviews was the offer of a troop of horse,
which the future Dean refused. King William, however, taught
Swift to eat asparagus in the Dutch way, that is, to eat both
head and stalk, a lesson not thrown away upon a person of his
thrifty disposition.
About this time Swift took his degree as Master of Arts at
Oxford, and was treated there with a respect and attention by
which he was highly gratified. He paid annual visits to his
mother, travelling on foot, and going at night to a penny lodg-
ing, where he purchased the luxury of clean sheets by an extra
gratuity; he thus gratified his passion for witnessing vulgar life,
and at the same time saved his money. When the bill for
triennial parliaments was strongly urged against the will of the
court, Swift was sent to convey Sir William's recommendation
to the King that the measure should be accepted. He was
honored with an audience; but William III., who had his full
share of Dutch obstinacy, disregarded Temple's remonstrances
and the arguments by which his messenger supported them ;
the bill, by a strong exertion of ministerial influence, was re-
jected in the House of Commons, and Swift, to the last hour of
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
23
bis life, used to dwell on the disappointment and mortification
produced by this failure.
In time he began to grow weary of the dependent life he led
at Moor Park, and solicited Temple to procure him some public
employment. His request not being granted very speedily, he
resigned his situation and returned to Ireland, resolved to
enter the church, though with no higher hopes than the chap-
laincy of the factory at Lisbon. The bishop to whom he ap-
plied for ordination required a certificate of his good conduct
during his residence at Moor Park. It was not without great
reluctance that he consented to ask any favor of his former
patron; when he did write, however, his letter opened the way
for a reconciliation; Sir William not only gave the required
certificate, but recommended his formery secretary so effectually
to Lord Capel, that Swift obtained the prebend of Kilroot, in
the diocese of Connor, then worth more than a hundred a year,
immediately after his admission to priest's orders.
Under these circumstances he appears to have renewed
rather than commenced his flirtation with Miss Waring, to
whom he affectedly gave the name of Varina. The courtship,
so far as it can be traced, is supremely ridiculous; while the
lady was coy and cold nothing could equal the impetuosity of
the lover, but when, after a long resistance, she unexpectedly
surrendered at discretion, the lover's ardor suddenly disap-
peared, the warm epistles to Varina were changed into a cold,
formal letter to Miss Jane Waring, in which all her former ob-
jections to the match were studiously recapitulated, and it was
hinted in terms which could not be misunderstood that the im-
patient suitor would be a very reluctant bridegroom. The lady
with proper spirit broke off all intercourse, and Swift was free
to try his arts on a more unfortunate victim.
He soon grew weary of the stagnation of Kilroot, especially
as his conduct seems not to have been in accordance with his
sacred profession, but to have excited some scandal among the
surrounding gentry. A constant tradition in the neighborhood
records that he was charged with an indecent assault on a
farmer's daughter, and that criminal informations were sworn
against him before Mr. Dobbs, a neighboring magistrate. Sir
William Temple was anxious to get back a secretary whose
talents he had now begun to appreciate; he wrote urgent let-
ters soliciting Swift's return to Moor Park, and promising to
make strenuous efforts for his promotion. Whilst he still
hesitated, he accidentally met a brother clergyman in one of
his excursions, with whose appearance he was so struck that he
24
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICEÉ
1
formed his acquaintance. He learned that he was a curate
"passing rich with forty pounds a years," that he had to sup-
port a wife and eight children out of this miserable stipend,
and that for want of interest he had no chance or expectation
of promotion. No man was occasionally more capable of
noble acts of benevolence than Swift; he borrowed a favorite
black horse from his new friend, posted up to Dublin, rẹ-
signed his prebend to the Lord Deputy, and procured the suc
cession for the meritorious curate. On Swift's return he sought
the clergyman, and informed him that he had been appointed
to a benefice. Great was the poor curate's pleasure and as
tonishment, but greater was his sorrow, when he learned that
he had been promoted at the expense of his generous friend
At first he peremptorily refused to accept the prebend, and
when his reluctant scruples were overcome he insisted that
Swift should accept his famous black horse as a small token of
his gratitude. Mounted for the first time on a horse of his
own, and with eighty pounds in his pocket, Swift departed from
Kilroot on his road to England. The memory of his gener-
osity to the curate is still preserved round Kilroot, where the
favorite black horse is a popular sign.
II.
When Swift resumed his post as secretary at Moor Park,
bright prospects seemed to be opening before him, but it was
at this period that he laid the foundation of all his future
misery, for during his second residence with Sir William Tem
ple, he became acquainted with Miss Esther Johnson, better
known under the poetic name of Stella. The best account ot
that unfortunate lady is contained in a letter addressed by her
niece, Mrs. Hearn, to Mr: G. M. Berkeley, which that gentle-
man published in his very scarce and entertaining volume of
Literary Relics.*
"Mrs. Esther Johnson, better known by the name of Stella,
was born at Richmond, in Surrey, on the 13th of March, 1681.
Her father was a merchant, and the younger brother of a good
family in Nottinghamshire. He died young, and left his widow
with three children, a son and two daughters. Whilst Mrs
Johnson lived at Ramond, she had the happiness of becom
ing first acquainted with Lady Gifford, the sister of Sir William
Temple. The uncommon endowments both of body and mind
*For the use of this volume the editor is indebted to T. King, Sr., Esq., commissionei
in London for the Irish courts of law.
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
25
which Mrs. Johnson certainly possessed in a high degree, soon
gained her not only the esteem but the warm friendship of that
excellent lady, a friendship which lasted till death. As they
seldom were apart, and Lady Gifford lived much with her
brother Sir William, it was through her that Mrs. Johnson and
her two daughters (her son dying young) were brought to the
knowledge and friendship of Sir William Temple and his lady;
who discovering so many excellences and such fine parts in
the little Hetty, as she was always called in the Temple family,
so far took upon themselves the care of her education as to
bring her up with their own niece, the late Mrs. Temple, of
Moor Park, by Farnham; a most acceptable piece of kindness
and friendship this to the mother, whose little portion had
been greatly injured by the South Sea bubbles. And here it
was that Dean Swift first became acquainted with Stella, and
commenced that attachment which terminated in their marriage.
The cause why that marriage was not owned to the world has
never been thoroughly explained. It is the opinion, however,
of her own family, that their finances not being equal to the
style in which the Dean wished to move as a married man,
could be the only one; Stella's own fortune being only £1500;
£1000 of which, as a farther mark of friendship, was left by
Sir William Temple himself. It was Dean Swift's wish at last
to have owned his marriage; but finding herself declining very
fast, Stella did not choose to alter her mode of life, and be-
sides, fully intended coming over to England to her mother."
It has been said by those who have attempted Swift's vin-
dication, that he only intended an innocent flirtation when he
first made Stella's acquaintance, and they assign as a proof
that he still continued to press Varina to consent to a marriage.
This will, to most, appear an aggravation of his offence: no
man has a right for his amusement to trifle with the affections
of a young and innocent female, to win a heart for the express
purpose of breaking it, to stake his fictions against her realities,
and when he had won by the counterfeit, triumph in the cheat
and trample on the loser.
During the four years of Swift's second residence at Moor
Park, he began to appear before the world as a poet, by pub-
lishing a Pindaric Ode to Temple, to King William, and to the
Athenian Society, "a knot of obscure men," says Dr. Johnson,
"who published a periodical pamphlet of answers to the ques-
tions sent, or supposed to be sent, by letters." These verses
are of very inferior merit: it is said that when Dryden perused
thein, he declared to the mortified author, "Cousin Swift, you
26
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
will never be a poet," and to this denunciation the perpetual
malevolence which Swift manifested towards Dryden is gener
ally attributed. It was probably during this period also that
he wrote the "Tale of a Tub," and the "Battle of the Books,"
but they were not published until several years after.
In 1699, Sir William Temple died, bequeathing Swift a
considerable sum of money, and also his manuscripts, which he
probably deemed still more valuable. Before his death, Tem-
ple obtained from King William a promise of the first prebend
that should become vacant in Canterbury or Westminster for
his secretary; that this promise might not be forgotten, Swift:
dedicated to the King the posthumous works with which he
had been intrusted; but neither the dedication nor Swift's
reiterated applications could induce the monarch to perform
his promise. Some time afterwards, Swift went over to Ireland
with Lord Berkeley as his private secretary; but soon after
they reached Dublin, a person named Bush persuaded the
Lord Justice that such a situation was unsuited to a clergy
man, and obtained the office for himself. Nor was this his
only mortification: the rich deanery of Derry became vacant
which Swift expected to obtain, but through the influence of
the secretary it was bestowed on somebody else, and Swift was
dismissed with the livings of Laracor and Rathbeggin, in the
county of Meath.
I
At Laracor he increased the parochial duties by reading
prayers on Wednesday and Friday; as this was a novelty, few
of the parishioners at first attended, and on one occasion,
Roger the clerk formed the entire congregation. Swift, with
unmoved gravity, began, "Dearly beloved Roger, the Scrip-
ture moveth you and me in sundry places," etc.; and so went
through the entire service. Notwithstanding this and some
other instances of irreverence, which need not be recorded, he
generally performed all the offices of his profession with great
decency and exactness.
Soon after his settlement at Laracor, he invited the unfor-
tunate Stella to Ireland, together with a Mrs. Dingley, whose
presence it was hoped would prevent scandal. With these
ladies he passed his hours of relaxation, and to them he opened
his bosom; but they never resided in the same house, nor did
he ever see them without a witness. They lived at the parson-
age when Swift was away, and when he returned removed to a
lodging, or to the house of a neighboring clergyman. Such a
mode of life was necessarily painful to the lady, nor can there
be any plausible defence made for withholding from her the
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
27
name and station of a wife. Palliations of his conduct have
been attempted by most of his biographers, but the circum-
stances on which they rely must to every person of proper
feeling appear aggravations of his offence.
Swift's first prose work was an Essay on the Dissensions in
Athens and Rome, published in 1701, when the author had
attained his thirty-fourth year. On its first appearance it was
generally attributed to Bishop Burnet, a circumstance which by
no means flattered the pride of the author. Three years after-
wards was published the "Tale of a Tub," a work which he
never directly owned, and never distinctly denied. "Charity,"
says Dr. Johnson, "may be persuaded to think that such a
work might be written by a man of peculiar character, without
ill attention, but it is of dangerous example." Although super-
stition and fanaticism are fairly open to ridicule, and indeed
can scarcely be attacked with any other weapon, because they
defy argument and are unassailable by learning, yet there are
certain limits, beyond which the use of such a weapon is crimi-
nal. The "Tale of a Tub" in many passages outrages common
decency, and in the Essay on the Operations of the Spirit the
author has indulged in impious blasphemy against articles of
faith recognized in every Christian church. Some have claimed
pardon for the book, because the Established Church, consid-
ered as an institution, is everywhere mentioned with reverence;
but the creed of a church is not less important than its estab-
lishment, and Swift's ridicule was not unfrequently, though
unconsciously, directed against doctrines which the Anglican
formularies have placed among the essentials of Christianity.
The digressions relating to Wotton and Bentley display an equal
want of knowledge and integrity; Swift did not understand
the controversies, and he misrepresented them at random.
Posterity has long ago decided between wit and truth; Bentley
has received his due honor from scholars, and his opponents
are forgotten. The Battle of the Books is said by Dr. Johnson
to be an imitation of the French Combat des Livres there is
no use in discussing the question of originality, for both the
French and English works have been long since consigned to
unhonored oblivion.
20
In the year 1708 he published the "Sentiments of a Church
of England Man," a "Ridicule of Astrology," an "Argument
against abolishing Christianity," and a " Defence of the Sacra-
mental Test." The "Argument against abolishing Chris-
tianity" is far the best of these works; it is written in a vein
of happy irony, and exposes with just severity the miserable.
-"
28
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
vanity of those infidels who hope to acquire fame by an affecta-
tion of singularity, and whose notions of glory are not unlike
those of the incendiary of the temple of Ephesus. In the year
following, he published a "Project for the Advancement of
Religion," which, like most such projects, is quite impracti-
cable.
At this time Swift was a zealous Whig, and wrote several
pamphlets and poetical squibs to support his party; few of
these can now be traced, for the author was subsequently very
anxious to efface all recollection of them. One of them,
"Merlin's Prophecy," designed to flatter the Duke of Marl-
borough, and encourage the English people to persevere in the
war against France, possesses more merit than is usual in such
productions, and it presents, moreover, a curious contrast to
the opinions maintained in Swift's subsequent writings.
MERLIN'S PROPHECY. 1709.
Seven and ten added to nine,
Of Fraunce her woe this is the sygne;
Tamys rivere troys y-frozen;
Walke sans wetyng shoes ne hozen.
Then comyth foorthe ich understonde
From towne of Stoffe to fattyn londe. †
An hardie chieftan, woe the morne,
To Fraunce that evere he was born.
Then shall the fyshe bewayle his bosse; ‡
Nor shall grim berrys § make up the losse.
Younge Symnele shall again miscarrye,
And Norways pryd ¶ again shall marrey;
And from the tree where blosums feele
Ripe fruit shall come and all is wele.
Reaums shall daunce honde in honde,
And it shall be merry in old Inglonde;
Then old Inglonde shall be no more,
And no man shall be soyrie therefore.
Geryon †† shall have three hedes agayne,
Till Hapsburge ‡‡ makyth them but twayne.
*
**
When Lord Wharton became Lord-lieutenant of Ireland,
Swift applied through Lord Somers, to whom he then paid
*“Dec 25th, 1709, a severe frost set in; it lasted with little intermission three months.
The Thames was frozen over; booths were built upon it, and there were all manners of
diversion upon the ice." Wade's British History.
↑ Marlborough.
The Dauphin of France.
The Pretender.
The Duke de Berry.
Queen Anne; her husband had been Prince of Denmark.
The union of Scotland and England.
†† A fabulous king of Spain said to have been slain by Hercules. The three heads are
the king of Portugal and the two claimants of the Spanish crown. Philip of France and
Charles of Austria.
#The Archduke Charles was of the Hapsburgh family.
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
зsiduous court, for a recommendation to his Exceliency. The
result is related in the following letter, addressed by Dr. Salter,
master of the Charter-house, to the eminent antiquarian, Mr.
Nichols :
"Lord Somers recommended Swift at his own very ear-
nest request to Lord Wharton, when that Earl went lieutenant
to Ireland in 1708, but without success; and the answer Whar-
ton is said to have given was never forgotten nor forgiven by
Swift, but seems to have laid the foundation of that peculiar
rancor with which he always mentions Lord Wharton. I saw
and read two letters of Jonathan Swift, then prebendary of St.
Patrick's, Dublin, to Lord Somers: the first, earnestly entreat-
ing his favor, pleading his poverty, and professing the most
unalterable attachment to his lordship's person and cause. The
second, acknowledging Lord Somers's kindness in having
recommended him; and concluding with the like professions,
not more than a year before Swift deserted Lord Somers, and
all his friends, writing avowedly on the contrary side; and (as
he boasts himself) libelling all the junto round. I saw also the
very letters which Lord Somers wrote to Lord Wharton, in
which Swift is very heartily and warmly recommended; and I
well remember the short and very smart answer which Lord
Wharton is said to have given, which, as I have observed, Swif
never forgave nor forgot. It was to this purpose, 'Oh! my
lord, we must not prefer or countenance these fellows; we have
not character enough ourselves.”
Soon after this disappointment, the busy and important part
of Swift's life began. In 1710, he was employed by the Primate
of Ireland to solicit the Queen for a remission of the first-fruits
to the Irish clergy. For this purpose, he had recourse to
Harley, then fast rising into favor, and was introduced to him
as a person injuriously neglected by the late Whig cabinet, for
refusing to co-operate in some of their schemes. Harley's
designs and situation were such as to make him glad of an
auxiliary so well qualified for his service; he therefore admitted
him to familiarity, if not to friendship, and engaged him to
employ his pen in defence of the new administration. Addison
and Steele were the principal writers on the side of the Whigs,
and Swift had long been the intimate friend of both; but no
sooner had he taken a share in political controversy than he
assailed both, but more especially Steele, with a violence quite
unbecoming the character of a clergyman or a gentleman. For
two years he supported Harley with equal zeal and efficiency;
his pamphlet on the Conduct of the Allies, published in 1712,
30
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
ten days before the meeting of Parliament, was one of the most
successful party productions that ever appeared; eleven thou-
sand copies of it were sold in less than three months; and it
rendered the war, which had been hitherto one of the most
popular in which England had ever engaged, so universally
odious, that the people clamored for peace, almost on any terms.
Such services merited a high reward, and Swift was not a man
to work without payment. He demanded an English bishopric,
which Harley was not unwilling to grant, provided it could be
bestowed without offending his clerical supporters. But the
clergy could not endure the promotion to the episcopal bench
of the author of the "Tale of a Tub." Archbishop Sharpe, in
the name of his brethren, demanded an audience of the Queen,
and besought her Majesty not to bestow episcopal dignity on a
person whose belief in Christianity was suspicious, at the same
time directing her attention to the most offensive passages in
the "Tale of a Tub;" he was seconded by the Duchess of
Somerset, whom Swift had bitterly lampooned in some verses,
called the "Windsor Prophecy," which she showed the Queen.
Anne, who, on religious matters at least, was a right-minded
woman, declared that Swift should never be a prelate, and nc
subsequent remonstrances would induce her to alter this deter
mination. The ministers gave him the best preferment they
could venture to bestow, the deanery of St. Patrick's, Dublin,
and early in 1713 he went over to take possession. His ap-
pointment, however, was not less unpopular in the Irish, than
it would have been in the English church; and on the day
appointed for his installation the following verses (written by
Dr. Smedley, dean of Ferns) were found posted on the gates of
the cathedral:
To-day this temple gets a Dean,
Of parts and fame uncommon;
Used both to pray and to prophane,
To serve both God and mammon.
When Wharton reign'd a Whig he was;
When Pembroke, that's dispute, sir ;
In Oxford's time what Oxford pleased,
Non-con., or Jack, or Neuter.
This place he got by wit and rhyme,
And many ways most odd;
And might a bi hop be in time,
Did he believe in God.
For high-churchmen and policy
He swears he prays most hearty
But would pray back again, would in
A Dean of any party
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
Four lessons, Dean! all in one day,
Faith it is hard, that's certain;
"Twere better hear thy own Peter say
God damn you Jack, and Martin.
Hard to be plagued with Bible still,
And Prayer-book before thee,
Hadst thou not wit to think at will
Of some diverting story.
Look down, St. Patrick! look, we pray,
On thine own church and steeple!
Convert thy Dean on this great day,
Or else, God help the people!
And now whene'er his Deanship dies
Upon his tomb be graven,-
A man of God here buried lies,
Who never thought of heaven.
By the
Having placed Stella in lodgings near the deanery, Swift
returned to England, where the disputes between Harley,
recently created Earl of Oxford, and his colleague, Lord Boling-
broke, threatened the ruin of the Tory party. Harley had only
become a Tory for convenience; when he obtained power, he
had formed no definite plan of policy. Obliged to court the
party by which he was supported, he was unwilling to make his
quarrel with the Whigs utterly irrecoverable; he therefore cor-
responded with both expectants of the crown, and paid secret
court both to the Pretender and the Elector of Hanover. The
Dean was dissatisfied with these half-measures; he endeavored
vainly to stimulate the tardiness of Harley; he published a
letter to the October Club, which was composed of the most
violent Tories, and when he found that Harley was not to be
stimulated to a more daring course, he connected himself with
Bolingbroke, who was both more courageous and unscrupulous
than his colleague.
The Whig leaders seem to have been aware of the danger-
ous tendency of Swift's counsels. Complaints were made of
his influence with the ministry by Finch, Earl of Nottingham,
in the lords, and by Walpole and Aislabie in the commons; they
charged him directly with plotting to bring in the Pretender.
It is remarkable that Swift in a poem upon himself, written at
the close of the year 1713, records these imputations without
attempting to deny them.
'Now Finch alarms the lords; he hears for certain,
This dangerous priest is got behind the curtain.
Finch, famed for tedious elocution, proves
That Swift oils many a spring which Harley mover
32
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
Walpole and Aislabie, to clear the doubt,
Inform the commons that the secret's out;
'A certain doctor is observed of late
To haunt a certain minister of state;
From whence with half an eye we may discover,
The peace is made, and Perkin must come over."
In 1714, Swift published the "Public Spirit of the Whigs "
in reply to the "Crisis," a pamphlet for which Steele was ex-
pelled from the House of Commons. The Dean assailed his
former friend with great bitterness, treating him sometimes with
contempt and sometimes with abhorrence. He also assailed the
entire Scottish nation with such vehemence that the Scotch lords
went in a body to the Queen to demand reparation, and a procla-
mation was issued, offering a reward of three hundred pounds
for the discovery of the author. The result, however, was in a
short time either forgiven or forgotten, and Swift boasted that
he was visited by the Scotch lords more than ever.
Admitted on terms of equality to the intimacy of the noble
and the powerful, courted by all aspirants to office, enjoying
the society of the classic wits, who gained for Anne's reign the
name of the Augustan age of English literature, Swift's malig-
nant star was still lord of the ascendant. During one of his
long ministerial attendances in London, he became acquainted
with Miss Vanhomrigh, to whom he gave the affected name of
Vanessa, a lady possessing wit, beauty, a competent share of
wealth, and universal admiration. Fascinated by the genius of
Swift, she encouraged his indiscreet advances until both became
so far involved that they could neither go forward nor recede
without a heavy sacrifice. During his absence from Dublin, he
regularly sent a journal of his proceedings to Stella and Mrs.
Dingley; a change in the style of these communications is very
obvious after he had become intimate with Vanessa; the tone
is more cold, the language more querulous, and there are occa-
sional bursts, which clearly show a heart ill at ease. For a time,
however, the increasing excitement of politics diverted his at-
tention from private affairs; the increasing jealousy and hatred
between Oxford and Bolingbroke threatened the utter ruin of
the Tory party, and Swift vainly used every effort to bring
about a reconciliation. He twice tried the effect of a personal
interview, from which both departed with mutual dissatisfaction.
Swift declared to them that all was lost; Oxford denied his
accuracy, but Bolingbroke whispered that he was right.
The Queen's closet became now the centre of agitating in-
trigues, which Anne had not strength either of mind or body to
endure. She had a natural leaning to her brother, the Pre-
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
33
tender, and had that prince gratified her by conforming to the
Protestant religion, the Stuarts would, in all probability, have
retained the throne of England; she disliked the Hanoverian
family because the Elector had endeavored to thwart her pro-
jects of peace, and because the Princess Sophia, through whom
the succession was continued to the House of Brunswick, had
indulged in injurious reflections on her sincerity. Harley
dreaded the Stuarts, and probably believed that he had suc-
ceeded in making an interest with the Protestant successor, but
he gave still deeper offence to the Queen by quarrelling with
the favorite, Lady Masham. Bolingbroke adopted all the pre-
judices of his royal mistress, and paid the most assiduous at-.
tention to her favorite. Bitter altercations took place in the
royal presence; Anne's health visibly declined; their dissen-
sions and her disease increased together. At length, on the
27th of July, 1714, Oxford was suddenly dismissed from office and
Bolingbroke seemed to have the great objects of his ambition
within his grasp; but on the 29th of the same month the Queen
was seized with a lethargic disorder, attended by the most
alarming symptoms. Swift is said to have advised Bolingbroke
and his colleagues to take immediate steps for securing the
succession of the Pretender, but they hesitated on adopting a
course that would peril their lives and fortunes. At the coun-
cil on the following day timidity and indecision prevailed; sud-
denly the two most powerful Whig lords, the Dukes of Argyle
and Somerset, entered, though they had not been summoned,
and were invited to take their seats at the board by the Duke
of Shrewsbury. Their proposals for securing the Hanoverian
succession were adopted without opposition, and Bolingbroke
saw that his visions of power were dissipated almost as soon
as they had been formed. On the 1st of August the Queen
died, and George I. was solemnly proclaimed in London and
Westminster.
On the accession of George I. the Whigs returned to power,
and immediately began to assail the former ministers with pros-
ecutions and impeachments. Bolingbroke and Ormond fled
to the continent; the Earl of Oxford was sent to the Tower;
Swift returned to Dublin, which he regarded as a place of exile,
and where he was exposed to some danger by the seizure of
treasonable papers which were found directed to him.
The Church of Ireland then, as now, was divided between
two parties, which may, perhaps, without offence, be distin-
guished as the Puritanical and the Orthodox, whose only bond
of union was their common hatred of Popery. From the very
34
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
beginning the leaders of the Reformed Church in Ireiand had
shown a strong leaning towards the principles adopted by the
English non-conformists, and this tendency was much increased
among the native clergy by the Cromwellian settlement, which
introduced a large body of Independents into Ireland, and dif-
fused an impatience of Episcopal control through the great ma-
jority of the Protestant body. As in Anne's reign the Whigs
and Tories had held power alternately, so the ecclesiastical
dignities in Ireland were divided between the high and low
church, the former possessing most influence with the clerical
body, the latter with the congregations. A whimsical incident
exasperated the mutual jealousy of the Protestant parties, "the
pious, glorious, and immortal memory of King William
frequently given as a toast in mixed companies, and, of course,
was offensive to those Tories who entertained Jacobite princi-
ples. Browne, Bishop of Cork, published a sermon against
toasts generally and this toast in particular, which gave great
offence to the majority of the Protestant community; they
added the bishop's name to their favorite toast, with no very
complimentary addition, and applied it as a test of Jacobitism
whenever a clergyman was present.
was
در
Swift came over from England a strenuous advocate for the
extreme principles of high church, which had been so long the
watchword of his party, and a resolute supporter of the clerical
privileges which the Whigs were accused of menacing. His
assertion of his own rights as Dean soon involved him in
harassing and vexatious disputes with Archbishop King and
the Chapter; but in the end Swift triumphed, and he subse-
quently acquired such an ascendency over the Chapter that
no resistance was made to any of his propositions.
Believing that Ireland was destined to be his residence dur-
ing the remainder of his days, Swift arranged a mode of living
equally consistent with his notions of parsimony and dignity.
For the most part he dined, at a stipulated price, with Mr.
Worral, a clergyman of his cathedral, whose house was recom-
mended by the peculiar neatness and pleasantry of his wife.
On two days in the week he opened his house to the public,
and dined off plate with great pomp ; his entertainments were
soon frequented by the most eminent men and most elegant
ladies in Dublin. Stella regulated the tabie on public days,
but appeared at it as a mere guest, like the other ladies.
Miss Vanhomrigh's arrival in Ireland and assertion of her
claims soon disturbed the happiness of the circle. Stella's
anxiety affected her spirits and materially injured her health:
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
35
In a few weeks she was brought to the verge of the grave.
Swift, shocked at the effects which his conduct seemed likely
to produce, applied to his old friend and tutor, St. George Ashe,
Bishop of Clogher, requesting him to inquire from Stella what
would restore her peace of mind. Her answer, as reported by
the Bishop, was to this effect, "That for many years she had
patiently borne the tongue of slander, but that hitherto she had
been cheered by the hope of one day becoming his wife; that
of such an event she now saw no probability, and that conse-
quently her memory would be transmitted to posterity branded
with the most unmerited obloquy."
She dwelt also on another circumstance, which serves to
throw a darker shade over the traits of selfishness in Swift's
character. This was an eligible offer of marriage that had been
made her by a gentleman named Tisdal, which Swift had first
endeavored to defeat indirectly by prescribing harsh conditions,
and when these were accepted by the ardent lover, had rejected
altogether.
The Bishop communicated this conversation to the Dean,
'who said in reply, "That in early life he had laid down two
maxims with respect to matrimony; the first was, never to
marry unless possessed of a competency; the second, unless
this was the case at such a period of life as afforded him a prob-
able prospect of living to educate his family; but yet since
her happiness depended on his marrying her, he would directly
comply with her wishes on the following terms: that it should
remain a secret from all the world, unless the discovery were
called for by some urgent necessity, and that they should con-
tinue to reside in separate houses."
To these harsh conditions Stella yielded a reluctant as-
sent, and they were privately married in the deanery by the
Bishop in the early part of the year 1716. Immediately after
the ceremony Swift exhibited the most violent paroxysms of
mental agitation; he hurried from the deanery to the palace,
and had a private interview with Archbishop King, which lasted
more than an hour. Towards its close Dr. Delany accidentally
entered the library; Swift instantly hurried out so distractedly
as not to recognize his friend, and when Delany came up to the
Archbishop, he found him dissolved in tears. On inquiring the
reason, the Archbishop replied, "You have just met the most
unfortunate man in the world, but you must never venture to
ask me the cause of his misfortunes." The nature of the
secret intrusted to the Archbishop never transpired; it was at
one time supposed that it might be discovered among some of
36
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
his papers, but they have been searched for the purpose in vain,
and there is a tradition in the family that the Archbishop was
heard to declare that the secret would perish with him. Delany
at one time believed that both Swift and Stella were natural
children of Sir William Temple, and that the relationship was
not discovered until after the marriage. But this theory has
been long since abandoned, and there are positive proofs that
no such relationship existed. Whatever may have been the
nature of the impediment, it is certain that Swift and Stella
never met afterwards except in the presence of a third person.
It is lamentable to add, that even after the marriage, Swift
continued to keep up a tender intimacy with Miss Vanhom-
righ. She resided at a beautiful and romantic seat near Cel-
bridge, where, according to the tradition of the neighborhood,
she led a gloomy and secluded life, and was never seen to smile
except at the periods of Swift's visits. Many anecdotes of her
kindness and benevolence are still related by the peasantry,
and the Dean's memory is anything but popular in the vicinity
of Celbridge. It was probably about this period that he pro-
jected "Gulliver's Travels," which he designed to form part of
a satire on the abuses of human learning, to be compiled con
jointly by himself, Arbuthnot, and Pope. So far as the first
sketch can be traced in the hints contained in the letters to
and from Vanessa, it appears that the project was originally
confined to caricaturing the exaggerations of travellers. The
popularity of "Robinson Crusoe appears to have suggested
the change in the character of Gulliver, from a starched phi-
losopher, as originally designed, to a blunt sailor. Dunlop, in
his erudite History of Fiction, has dwelt very forcibly on the
points of resemblance between Gulliver and Crusoe, and has
established a strong probability that the similarity is not ac-
cidental.
})
In the year 1720, Swift quitted his occupations and amuse-
ments, to appear once more upon the stage as a politician.
Ireland was at this period the most unhappy country in Europe;
its ancient nobles and landed proprietors had been driven into
exile during the civil wars, their places were supplied by the
descendants of Cromwell's soldiers and adventurers, whose sole
security for their new estates consisted in the support of the
English Parliament and the protection of the English army.
To purchase this aid they were forced to sacrifice the national
prosperity of their adopted country to the commercial jealousy
of England; but they paid the price with reluctance, and would
have resisted had they dared. But the governing party in
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
37
Ireland, the Protestant ascendency, was comparatively
small, dependent on their connection with England for their
support against the great majority, who regarded them as
aliens, and hated them for their religion, and for the lands
confiscated from the old natives. William III. appears to
have been in some degree coerced by the English Parliament
into the measures which he adopted for destroying the
woolen manufacture in Ireland, where it had acquired con-
siderable prosperity; and he applied to the Irish Parliament
to pass laws themselves for the encouragement of the
hempen and linen manufactures in their country, and the
discouragement of the woolen. In compliance with this.
requisition, an act was passed in January, 1698, for the
imposition of such additional duties on all woolens except
friezes as amounted almost to a prohibition. But this did
not satisfy the spirit of monopoly which then possessed the
British Parliament. A joint address from both Houses
was presented against Irish woolens, to which the King
made the following memorable reply:
MY LORDS AND GENTLEMEN:
I shall do all that in me lies to discourage the woolen
manufacture of Ireland, and to encourage the linen manu-
facture there, and to promote the trade of England.
July 24, 1698.
The promise to encourage linen was not kept, but the
discouragement of woolens was observed to the letter. In
the year 1699, the British Parliament prohibited the expor-
tation from Ireland of all cloths made of wool, or contain-
ing any mixture of it, to any country except South Britain,
and even in that case under such duties and restrictions as
virtually amounted to a total exclusion. These prohibitory
laws were accompanied with enforcements as inconsistent
with the legislative distinctness of Ireland, as with the prin-
ciples of the English constitution. The accused were liable
to the penalties of confiscation, imprisonment and transpor-
tation, without the benefit of a fair trial; for though they
should have been acquitted under all the forms of law in
Ireland, they might still be carried to England to be tried
by a foreign jury, far from their friends and the witnesses
in their favor, perhaps without money or resources.
Such a system of government produced general distress.
and Swift made an effort for its alleviation, by publishing
a pamphlet recommending the Irish to abstain from (
use of English manufactures, and to use no articles of d'us
38
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
that were not the produce of native industry. The ruling
powers were alarmed; the pamphlet was declared seditious;
its printer, Waters, was arrested, and brought to trial. Whit-
shed, the Chief Justice, one of the most thorough partisans
that ever sat on the Irish bench, charged the jury, and laying
his hand on his heart, solemnly protested that the author's
design was to bring in the Pretender; and when a verdict for
acquittal was tendered, he remanded the jury nine times, until
at length he wearied them into a special verdict, by which the
matter was left to the discretion of the judges. His colleagues
were afraid to act upon the verdict; the invidious business
was adjourned from term to terrn, until at length, in the vice-
royalty of the Duke of Grafton, it was terminated by a nolle
prosequi.
The violence of the government tended only to invest Swift
with extraordinary popularity; he became a universal favorite
with all classes of Irishmen, save the mere creatures of the
castle; and while his-circle of private friends was enlarged, he
tasted largely of the pleasures derived from public admiration.
But he made little use of the power thus obtained; his time was
frittered away in trifling and jocular communications to Sheri-
dan, Delany, and his other admirers, few of which rise above
the level of mediocrity. Fate had also a severe blow in store
for him. In 1723, Miss Vanhomrigh urged an immediate union
so pertinaciously that he was forced to confess that he had been
already married to Stella. Disappointment and vexation brought
the unfortunate Vanessa to a premature grave: before her death,
she destroyed a will which she had made in the Dean's favor,
and made a second, in which she enjoined her executors to
publish the poem of Cadenus and Vanessa, in which the Dean
had avowed his love, and also several of his warmest letters.
Bishop Berkeley, one of Swift's most intimate friends, was ap-
pointed the executioner of her vengeance; he published the
poem with great reluctance, but he withheld the letters, for
reasons sufficiently obvious to all who have read the portion of
this correspondence which has since appeared.
The effect produced by the appearance of the poem, both
on Swift and Stella, was very great. The Dean went on a tour
through the south of Ireland for two months, both to banish un-
pleasant reflections and to give time for calumny to subside.
Stella went to the house of a friend in the country, where, in a
few weeks, she recovered her usual equanimity.
During one of his occasional trips to England, Swift is said
to have waited on Sir Robert Walpole, and to have made over-
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
39
J
tures to that minister. In the course of conversation Swift
pointed to some ivy, and said, "I am like that ivy; I want
support." "Why, then, did you attach yourself to a falling
wall?" was the minister's witty rejoinder. The Dean saw that
there was no hope, and took his leave; but thenceforward he
cherished the most bitter animosity against Walpole. In the
notes on the character of Flimnap, in the Voyage to Lilliput,
some of Swift's attacks on the premier are pointed out; it de-
serves to be added, that they amused Walpole just as much as
they did other people.
In the year 1724 great complaints were made of a scarcity
of copper coinage in Ireland; to remedy the inconvenience a
patent was granted to Wood, a manufacturer of Wolverhampton,
authorizing him to coin one hundred and eighty thousand
pounds' worth of nalf-pence and farthings for the kingdom of
Ireland. The coins sent over by Wood were of a debased metal,
and Swift wrote a series of letters under the signature of a
Drapier, showing the folly of receiving, and the mischief that
must ensue from giving gold and silver for coin not worth a
third part of its nominal value. The nation became alarmed;
addresses against the patent were voted by the Irish Parlia
ment and most of the civic corporations. The grand jury of
the county of Lublin presented, as enemies to their country,
all who should attempt to put the coin into circulation; and
it was almost universally stigmatized by the magistrates and
gentlemen assembled at the quarter sessions throughout the
country. The british Privy Council published a report in
favor of the coin, and severely condemned the address of the
Irish Parliament. But the popular clamor was too great and
too general to be resisted, and on the recommendation of Arch-
bishop Boulter the patent was revoked in the following year.
Whatever may have been Swift's motives, and of their purity
reasonable doubts may be entertained, it is unquestionable that
on this occasion. he effected great good, not by upsetting Wood's
patent, which in fact was not injurious to the country, but by
showing the Irish what could be effected by turning from party
politics to a national object.
This publication gave serious annoyance to the government;
a proclamation was issued, offering a reward of three hundred
pounds for the discovery of the author; Harding, the printer,
was arrested, but the indictment preferred against him was
ignored by the grand jury. Swift subsequently waited on the
Lord-Heutenant Carteret, a nobleman of great politeness and
liberality, and remonstrated against the severe measures which
40
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
the government had adopted. Carteret replied by an
appropriate quotation from Virgil:
Res duræ et regni novitas me talia cogunt
Moliri.
Whenever Swift's life appeared most fraught with enjoy.
ment, some fatal shock seemed preparing for his domestic
misery. In the very midst of the Drapier's_popularity,
Stella's health began visibly to decline. The Dean was in
England when she was first attacked, preparing to pay a
visit to Lord Bolingbroke, then an exile in France; the
calamity brought him back to Ireland, where his presence
for a time restored Stella to imperfect health. He then
came back to England, and in conjunction with Pope, pub-
lished three volumes of Miscellanies.
In the year 1727 Gulliver's Travels appeared, and were
hailed with a mixture of merriment and amazement, which
at once stamped their popularity. Some contemporary
critics accused him of having imitated Defoe; and the
charge has been often repeated. No doubt, there are many
striking points of resemblance between the two great fic-
tions of these authors, especially in the air of truth which
the recital of minute and apparently trifling circumstances
gives to their narratives; but while Defoe strictly confines
himself to romantic adventure, Swift takes the higher aim
of philosophic satire, and seems to consider the incidents
of his story as secondary considerations.
Several foreign critics have expressed surprise at the
absence of all allusion to Defoe and his works in Swift's
productions. There is not, however, any part of Gulliver's
Travels in which such a reference appears necessary, or
even expedient; and if there were, it must still be remem-
bered that Swift and Defoe were at the opposite poles in
politics, and that nothing in England is so rare or so peril-
ous as justice to a party opponent. Even in the present
day, were a Tory to express admiration of Moore's witty
Lyrics, the cry of deserter would be raised by his friends;
or if a Whig paid due homage to Southey, the world would
look for his speedy enrollment in the Carlton Club. In
Swift's days the parties actually contended for life and
death; Oxford and Orford risked the penalties of treason
in their respective administrations; their followers looked
upon their rivals, not as opponents to be vanquished, but
as enemies to be exterminated. This has long been the
source of great intellectual evil in England, but perhaps
political injustice is a portion of the tax that must be paid
for political liberty,
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
III.
Gulliver's Travels were not published until after Swift's re-
turn to Ireland. They appeared with an affected mystery, of
which the Dean was very fond, and which even his most inti-
mate friends were compelled to respect. Pope, Arbuthnot, and
Gay so far humored his caprice as to write dubiously respect-
ing the author, though the two former must have known that
such a work was projected long before. There was, however, a
reason for this concealment, of which, in the present day, we
can form no very adequate notion. Walpole was so enraged
by the Drapier's Letters, that he threatened to arrest Swift ;
the Irish people formed voluntary associations for the Dean's
defence, and the minister was dissuaded from his design by a
judicious friend, who inquired whether he had ten thousand
men ready to escort the messenger charged with the execution
of the warrant? A new and more bitter attack on the admin-
istration seemed likely to awake the slumbering vengeance of
the Premier, and the recent impeachment of Bishop Atterbury
had shown that he would not be scrupulous in the use of in-
tercepted correspondence.
Few works have had greater success on their first appear-
ance than Gulliver's Travels; and there are fewer to whose
merits posterity has rendered more substantial justice. This
is not the place for entering upon the examination of its sub-
stantial deserts; but it is of some importance to examine how
it was viewed by contemporaries.
The Voyage to Lilliput is an exposure of the policy of the
English court during the reign of George I. Swift and his
friends were persuaded that the treaty of Utrecht had been
the salvation of Great Britain, that it had especially secured
our naval supremacy, and effectually prevented France from
rivalling us at sea. He therefore regarded the impeachment
of Oxford, and the banishment of Bolingbroke, as gross acts
of national injustice, attributable chiefly to the ambition and
jealousy of Walpole, whom he stigmatizes under the name of
Flimnap. The more minute political allusions are pointed out
in the notes; it will be more convenient here to confine atten-
tion to generalities. Walpole had many enemies, even in the
nominal Whig party, who professed themselves adherents to
the Prince of Wales; these persons, aware that they could not
of themselves form an administration, projected a coalition
with the Tories, or as they called them, the party of the country
gentlemen. In the language of the day, they hoped to form a
42
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
"broad-bottom ministry;" they affected to describe the d
ferences between the parties in principle as very trifling, not
greater than that between the high-heels and low-heels of Lilli-
put; and as appeals had been made to religious prejudices,
they represented the controversy between the Latin and Eng-
lish churches as not more important than that between the
Big-endians and the Little-endians. Projects for something like
a union between the churches were not unfrequently made at
the time, and the chances of success for a season, seemed far
from desperate. The Prince of Wales, afterwards George II.,
was believed not to be indisposed to a union of parties, as is
intimated by the heir-apparent of Lilliput wearing one shoe
with a high, and the other with a low heel. All these expecta-
tions were disappointed; but when the Travels appeared, they
were rife in every political circle, and the nation generally
looked for great advantages from their realization. The politi-
cal views advocated in Lilliput were therefore generally popular;
they gratified the entire body of the Tories, the discontented
section of the Whigs, and the great multitude which in every
free state looks for Utopian advantages from the mere fact of
change.
In Brobdingnag, the satire takes a wider range; the object
of assault is changed from the tactics of a party to the general
system of policy: like Bolingbroke, Swift attempts to sketch
the ideal character of a patriot king, and an efficient system of
government. The fiction is very happily suited to this design:
the opinions which beings of a reflective and philosophic char-
acter, endowed with immense force, were likely to form of the
intrigues and scandals of a European court, are developed
with exquisite skill. It is man viewing the political squabbles
of an ant-hill, or Gulliver himself estimating the court of Lilli-
put. The political principles advocated in the Voyage to Brob-
dingnag were the same as those which the Tory party supported
in Parliament. From the imperfection of the parliamentary
reports in these days, and from the influence of the cry of
Jacobitism, with which the Whig leaders assailed their oppo-
nents, we have only very imperfect specimens of the eloquence
of Shippen, Windham, St. Aubin, etc.; but even the fragments
which have been preserved prove that the Tory party in the
reign of George I. was highly respectable in character, talent,
and fearless advocacy of principle.
The contrast between Gulliver's position in Brobdingnag
and Lilliput is very happily conceived, and it lends singular
trce to the more general application of the satire. The enl
only
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
43
special attack in the Voyage to Brobdingnag is directed against
the maids of honor, for whom, as Dr. Delany informs us, Swift
had no great veneration. It was to the influence of the ladies
of the court that he attributed Archbishop Sharpe's success in
preventing him from getting a bishopric; and he suspected
that, notwithstanding all his flatteries, Mrs. Masham was far
from anxious to effect a change in his favor in the mind of
Queen Anne.
The Voyage to Laputa was the least relished, because it
was the least understood at the time of its publication. The
pursuits of the inhabitants of the Flying Island were designed
to ridicule the proceedings of the Royal Society, a body which
had previously come under the lash of the author of Hudibras.
Sir Isaac Newton had provoked the Dean's resentment, by
giving his opinions as master of the mint in favor of Wood's
copper coinage; and it was probably the absence of mind for
which that philosopher was notorious which suggested the
whimsical notion of the Flapper as an attendant upon the La-
putians. Swift had no taste for music; in his own words, he
could find no difference "'twixt tweedledum and tweedledee;"
he therefore deemed the passion for music, and especially the
general admiration of Handel which prevailed in his day, as a
legitimate object of satire. His attack on the musicians is,
however, a greater failure than that on the philosophers, for he
was too ignorant of the science to discover the points most open
to assault. In the College of Projections, he was more suc-
cessful; during the rage of speculation, which rose at the time
of the South Sea Scheme, proposals to the full as absurd as
any Swift has described were rife, and joint-stock companies
formed for their execution. Some of these will be found men-
tioned in the notes, and those who remember the years 1825
and 1826 will be at no loss to supply parallels. It was gen-
erally felt that the scenes with the ghost at Glubbdubdrib were
decided failures, and posterity has not reversed this judgment.
The melancholy description of the Struldbruggs appears to
have been written with too correct an anticipation of the ca-
lamitous end of Swift's own life; it is written with the same
feeling that dictated his exclamation to Dr. Young when they
passed a withered oak, "I am like that tree, I shall die at
top."
The most unpopular of the voyages with the generality of
readers was that of the Houyhnhnms; its misanthropy is repul-
sive, and almost disgusting; miserable indeed must be the
condition of a man who can derive pleasure from a satire
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
44
against humanity. But as Sir Walter Scott has well observed,
the state of society at that time in Ireland was well calculated
to inspire the worst opinions of human nature; Swift had be-
fore him a faction of petty tyrants and a nation of trampled
slaves; the penal laws, not less remarkable for their absurdity
than their iniquity, seemed as if the party of the ascendency
regarded persecution as a toy or plaything, and made human
suffering an unhuman sport. But there were other causes that
tended to strengthen and develop this morbid tendency to mis-
anthropy; Vanessa had sunk into an early grave, Stella was
fast following her; two tender and affectionate hearts were his
victims; all his ambitious projects were blighted, and a dis
ease, the most afflicting to which humanity is exposed, had
given premonitory warnings of its near approach. It was such
circumstances that generated the gloomy feelings under which
the character of the Yahoos was drawn. But disgusting as the
picture is, it still conveys an important moral lesson; it is a
probable delineation of what humanity might become if ex-
posed to the brutalizing influences of ignorance and unregulated
passions; it pictures the triumph of sensuality over intelligence,
and consequently sets forth in the strongest light the necessity
of moral training and religious instruction. There was in
Swift's day a large class of disappointed politicians, who, like
him, sought consolation in misanthropy. His old enemy, the
Duchess of Marlborough, who had long outlived her power, but
never lost the love of it, expressed her warm delight with the ac-
count of the Yahoos, and proclaimed Swift the only accurate
delineator of human nature.
The general narrative was not less agreeable to the mass of
readers than the satire to particular classes of politicians.
Gulliver's character is so thoroughly natural, so completely
that of the English sailor of his day, that many were disposed
to hail him as a personal acquaintance. A naval man at the
time used to assert that he knew Captain Gulliver very well,
but that he lived at Wapping, and not at Rotherhithe.
The fame of Gulliver was not confined to Britain; it spread
rapidly through Europe. Voltaire, who was then in England,
warmly recommended it to his friends in France, and advised
them to have it translated. The task was undertaken by
L'Abbé Desfontaines, who was, however, afraid to give a literal
version of Swift's bold opinions. He remodelled the work in
order to adapt it to French taste, and it is no unamusing task
to compare his translation with the original, as an example of
the differences in the style and habits of thought between the
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
45
Augustan age of England and that of France. The Abbé pub-
lished also a new Gulliver, which is utterly unreadable; the
same may be said of the continuation of Gulliver's Travels
which appeared in England; it was at once an impudent for-
gery and a miserable plagiarism from a French book not worth
robbing; it dropped, however, "stillborn" from the press.
IV.
Fortune appeared once more to shine on Swift, when Gul-
liver's Travels were published. Congratulatory and compli-
mentary letters were sent to him from the Court of the Prince
of Wales; the Princess and the Prince's mistress, who lived in
anomalous concord, both joined in these honors, and the Dean
had hopes that a new reign would open the door of promotion.
He sent the Princess a dress of Irish manufacture-a poplin,
which for the last century has been the chief glory of the Irish
loom. Caroline, in return, promised him a collection of med-
als, which she never sent. Mrs. Howard, the Prince's mis-
tress, sent the Dean a ring, in return for which he transmitted
her a little golden crown, which was designed to represent the
diadem of the Queen of Lilliput. In the midst of these en-
couraging circumstances, Stella died, and Swift's domestic hap-
piness, such as it was, ended forever. About the same time,
George I. died, and George II., to the surprise of everybody,
continued Walpole at the head of the administration. Swift
· made some efforts to preserve his favor with Queen Caroline,
but the Queen had forgotten the promises of the Princess. He
clung still longer to the hopes he entertained of promotion
through the influence of Mrs. Howard; but George II. was
governed by his wife, not by his mistresses, and atoned for his
conjugal infidelity by permitting the Queen to regulate all the
affairs of state. The Dean at length discovered that all his
exertions were vain; he returned to Ireland just before the
death of Stella, and never again visited England.
From time to time, Swift wrote occasional pamphlets on
Irish policy, which served to maintain his influence with the
public; but in private, the circle of his acquaintance became
daily more contracted, and few were admitted to his table who
did not submit to his caprices and administer large doses of
flattery to his pride. His favorite maxim became "Vive la
bagatelle," and it is probable that he found trifles necessary to
life. His petty amusements gave employment to a mind which
76
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
could not be idle, but which sickness and sorrow incapacitated
for steady exertion. As years advanced, his fits of giddiness.
and deafness became more frequent, and the acerbity of his
temper increased in the same proportion. He still preserved
the talent for minute observation, of which he had made such
good use in Gulliver, and gave a remarkable instance of it in
his "Polite Conversation," and his "Directions to Servants,"
the latter of which, however, was not published until after his
death. In 1736, while writing the "Legion Club," a bitter
lampoon on the Irish House of Commons, he was seized with
a fit of giddiness so severe and so long-continued that he never
after ventured to attempt any work of thought or labor. In
1741 his mental condition was such that it became necessary
to appoint legal guardians of his person and property. A
short interval of reason ensued in the following year, but the
hopes to which it gave rise were soon dispelled; in a few days
he sunk into a state of lethargic stupidity, motionless, heedless,
and speechless. Richard Brennan, the servant who attended
him in his last illness, and in whose arms he expired, used to
relate that whilst the power of speech remained, he continued
constant in the performance of his private devotions, and in
proportion as his memory failed, they were gradually shortened,
until at last he could only repeat the Lord's Prayer; which,
however, he continued to do until the power of utterance for-
ever ceased. His death was tranquil. "He went off," said
Brennan, "like the snuff of a candle." He bequeathed his
property to found a hospital for idiots and lunatics; in his own
words,-
He gave the little wealth he had
To build a house for fools and mad;
To show by one satiric touch,
No nation wanted it so much.
V.
Mr. G. M. Berkeley declared that there were only four au-
thentic portraits of Swift, of which that preserved as a kind of
heirloom in the deanery of St. Patrick's is the most faithful. A
copy of it adorns the Dining Hall in Trinity College, Dublin,
and represents a countenance strongly marked with grief, indig
nation, and benevolence. He was tall, robust, and well made,
his complexion was rather dark, his eyes were blue and very ex-
pressive. his eyebrows dark and heavy, his nose inclined to be
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
47
aquiline, his lips slightly curled upwards. In his youth he was
considered handsome, and in the decline of life his figure is
universally described as noble and imposing. He was a very
fluent speaker, ready at retort and reply, never thrown off his
centre by the unexpected attack of an assailant. This talent
would have rendered him a formidable auxiliary if the Tories
had given him a seat on the episcopal bench, in the English
House of Peers, at a time when, with the exception of Atter-
bury, there was not an English prelate calculated to shine in de-
bates. The successive lords-lieutenant of Ireland dreaded his
tongue as much as his pen; and all of them, from the amiable
Carteret to the haughty Dorset, sought to disarm his hostility
by paying homage to his genius.
All his biographers dwell on the charms of Swift's conversa-
tion; the originality of his humor, which was sometimes carried
too far, at first appeared startling, but when managed with the
skill which Swift could exert when he pleased, it rendered him
a companion whose society was everywhere sought. He de-
lighted in relating anecdotes, which his exquisite touches of satire
rendered irresistibly amusing, while his keenness of observation
made them not less instructive. He took great delight in puns,
and was the author of some of the best that exist; for instance,
his application of a line from Virgil to the lady who swept down
a Cremona fiddle with her mantle :
Mantua, væ! nimium misera vicini Cremonæ,
His singularity of expression was manifested on some ex-
traordinary occasions; when he introduced Bishop Berkeley to
Lord Berkeley of Stratton, he made use of these words, "My
lord, here is a relation of your lordship's who is good for some-
thing, and that, as times go, is saying a great deal.”
One day, while travelling in the south of Ireland, he stopped
to give his horse water at a brook which crossed the road; a
gentleman of the neighborhood halted for the same purpose, and
saluted him, a courtesy which the Dean returned. They parted,
but the gentleman, struck by the Dean's figure, sent his servant
to inquire who the Dean was; the messenger first made applica-
tion to the Dean's attendant, who was an original in his own
way, and he referred the man to his master. The messenger
rode up to the Dean, and said, "Please sir, master would be
obliged if you would tell him who you are?" "Willingly," re-
plied the Dean; "tell your master I am the person that bowed
to him when we were giving our horses water at the brook
yonder."
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
The Irish aristocracy had little favor with Swift; he keenly
assailed their jobbing propensities, particularly in the manage-
ment of roads and bridges; he assailed one with mock praise,
declaring,
So great was his bounty,
He erected a bridge at the cost of the county.
Another worthy had taken for his motto Eques haud male
notus, which Swift, with equal wit and truth, translated, " Better
known than trusted." Chief Justice Whitshead's motto was
made the subject of a stinging epigram:
▼
Libertas et natale solum-
Fine words! I wonder where you stole 'em ;
Could nothing but your chief reproach
Serve for the motto of your coach?
He had an extraordinary talent for extempore rhymes. An
innkeeper who wished to add the king's head to his old sign
of the bell, asked for a motto which might reconcile such an
anomaly. Swift gave him,
May the king live long;
Dong ding, ding dong.
After the publication of the Drapier's Letters he became so
popular that he was always followed by a crowd whenever he
appeared in the streets of Dublin. He used frequently to say
that the Irish ought to subscribe and purchase him a stock of
hats, for that his own was worn out by the number of salutes he
had to return.
Many apocryphal anecdotes are related of his interchange
of slang with the shoeblacks and beggars of Dublin, a race re-
markable for their readiness in repartee; but it has happened
to Swift as to other celebrated jesters, to be accounted the au-
thor of every joke, good and bad, perpetrated in his day, and
few of the jokes preserved by tradition are worthy of being re-
peated.
His epigrams and lampoons display a ready and caustic wit.
No man was more ready in "the amber immortalization" of an
enemy; the name of the unlucky offender, however unrhythmi
cal, "slides into verse and hitches in his rhyme," where it con-
tinues gibbeted, for, the mockery of all future generations. The
best example of this skill is the epigram on Whiston and Ditton,
which, however, cannot be quoted; next to it, perhaps, may be
ranked the notice of Bettesworth, a sergeant at law, who had
provoked the Dean's hostility by attacking the privileges of the
clergy:
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE.
40
4
Thus at the bar the booby Bettesworth,
Though half a crown o'erpays his sweat's worth,
Who knows in law, nor text, nor margent,
Calls Singleton his brother sergeant.
When the poem of which these lines form a part was first
published, it was brought wet from the press to a company in
which Bettesworth was present. The sergeant was asked to
read it, and when he came to the lines reflecting on himself, he
started up and vowed that he would take deadly revenge. He
hasted to the deanery, and, forcing his way to Swift's presence,
said, "Sir, I am Sergeant Bettesworth." The Dean, with a
most innocent face, asked, “Of what regiment, pray?" Bettes-
worth, still more enraged, demanded, "Are you the author of
this paper?" Swift, with great coolness, answered, "Mr. Bettes-
worth, I was, in my youth, acquainted with great lawyers, who,
knowing my disposition to satire, advised me if any scoundrel
or blockhead whom I had lampooned should ask me such a
question as you have put, that I should deny the authorship,
and I therefore tell you that I am not the author of these lines."
Bettesworth blustered, but could get no further satisfaction; at
at last he went off, saying," Mr. Dean, you are like one of your
own Yahoos; you have clambered to a place of security whence
you can gratify your vindictive temper by pelting filth at your
betters." As Bettesworth continued to threaten violent and
corporal revenge, the inhabitants of St. Patrick's district formed
an association for the Dean's defence, and the unfortunate law-
yer could scarcely venture to appear in the streets. He subse-
quently declared in Parliament that Swift's satire had deprived
him of more than twelve hundred pounds a year.
An epigram was the last composition of Swift, and almost
his last symptom of rationality. During a brief lucid interval
he was taken out for a drive by his physician; as they passed
through the park Swift remarked a new building which he had
rever seen before, and asked what it was. The physician re-
plied, "That, Mr. Dean, is the magazine of arms and powder,
for the security of the city." "O, ho!" said the Dean, pulling
out his pocketbook, "let me take an item of that, this is worth
remarking; 'my tablets,' as Hamlet says, 'my tablets, memory
put down that.'" He then produced the following lines, the
last which he ever wrote :
Behold a proof of Irish sense!
Here Irish wit is seen!
When nothing's left that's worth defence,
We build a magazine,
50
BIOGRAPHICAL NOTICE
""
The greatest difficulty in the analysis of Swift's literary
character is to discover by what depravity of intellect he ac-
quired a taste for loathsome and filthy ideas, from which every
other mind shrinks with disgust. "The ideas of pleasure.
says Dr. Johnson, "even when criminal, may solicit the imag、
ination; but what has disease, deformity, and filth upon which
the thoughts can be allowed to dwell?" The answer is not
easy; physicians, however, have frequently found such a mor-
bid perversion of the intellect connected with physiological de-
fects; the obliquity appears to have been constitutional with
Swift; it is found in his earliest as well as his latest works,
but it becomes most offensive when the symptoms of his last
lamentable disease began to manifest themselves.
стать
Few political writers could boast of such triumphs. In the
reign of Queen Anne, he turned the stream of popularity
against the Whigs, and must be confessed to have guided for a
time the entire mass of public opinion in Eugland. In the
ensuing reign he became the tribune of the Irish people, and
their political dictator. Supported only by a trampled and op-
pressed nation, he bade defiance to the crown, the bench, and
the Parliament, "and showed that wit confederated with truth
has such force as authority is unable to resist." To use the
words of Dr. Johnson, "He said truly of himself, that Ire-
land was his debtor. It was from the time that he first began
to patronize the Irish that they may date their riches and pros-
perity. He taught them first to know their own interest, their
weight, and their strength, and gave them spirit to assert that
equality with their fellow-subjects to which they have ever
since been making vigorous advances, and to claim those rights
which they have at last established. Nor can they be charged
with ingratitude to their benefactor, for they reverenced him as
a guardian and obeyed him as a dictator."
Swift's memory is still revered in Ireland, and especially in
Dublin; men of every party confess that he gave the first im-
pulse to the exertions made for constitutional freedom, and the
consequent development of a manufacturing industry. His
exertions of themselves were not, perhaps, of great moment,
but they were all-important as examples. There was in his
character much to condemn, but there was also much to admire ;
very inferior deserts may secure popularity for a day, substan-
tial merit can alone embalm a memory in the heart of a nation :
Then be his failings cover'd by his tomb,
And guardian laurels o'er his ashes bloom.
THE PUBLISHER TO THE READER.
LEMUEL GULLIVER, the author of these Travels, is my an-
cient and intimate friend; there is likewise some relation be-
tween us on the mother's side. About three years ago, Mr.
Gulliver, growing weary of the concourse of curious people
coming to him at his house in Redriff, made a small purchase
of land, with a convenient house, near Newark in Nottingham-
shire, his native country, where he now lives retired, yet in
good esteem among his neighbors.
Although Mr. Gulliver was born in Nottinghamshire, where
his father dwelt, yet I have heard him say his family came
from Oxfordshire; to confirm which, I have observed in the
church-yard at Banbury in that country, several tombs and
monuments of the Gullivers. Before he quitted Redriff, he
left the custody of the following papers in my hands, with the
liberty to dispose of them as I should think fit. I have care-
fully perused them three times. The style is very plain and
simple; and the only fault I find is, that the author, after the
manner of travellers, is a little too circumstantial. There is an
air of truth apparent throughout the whole; and, indeed, the
author was so distinguished for his veracity, that it became a
sort of proverb among his neighbors at Redriff, when any one
affirmed a thing, to say, "It was as true as if Mr. Gulliver had
spoken it."
By the advice of several worthy persons, to whom, with the
author's permission, I communicated these papers, I now ven-
ture to send them into the world, hoping they may be, at least
for some time, a better entertainment to our young noblemen
than the common scribbles of politics and party.
This volume would have been at least twice as large, if I
had not made bold to strike out innumerable passages relating
to the winds and tides, as well as to the variations and bear-
ings in the several voyages, together with the minute descrip-
tions of the management of the ship in storms, in the style of
sailors; likewise the account of longitudes and latitudes;
(61)
52
THE PUBLISHER TO THE READER.
wherein I have reason to apprehend that Mr. Gulliver may be
a little dissatisfied: but I was resolved to fit the work as much
as possible to the general capacity of readers. However, if my
own ignorance in sea affairs shall have led me to commit some
mistakes, I alone am answerable for them; and if any traveller
has e curiosity to see the whole work at large, as it came from
the hands of the author, I will be ready to gratify him.
As for any further particulars relating to the author, the
reader will receive satisfaction from the first page of the book.
RICHARD SYMPSON.
A LETTER
FROM
CAPTAIN GULLIVER TO HIS COUSIN SYMPSON.
WRITTEN IN THE YEAR 1727.
I HOPE you will be ready to own publicly, whenever you
shall be called to it, that, by your great and frequent urgency,.
you prevailed on me to publish a very loose and uncorrect
account of my travels, with direction to hire some young gen-
tleman of either university to put them in order, and correct
the style, as my cousin Dampier did by my advice, in his book
called "A Voyage Round the World." But I do not remember
I gave you power to consent that anything should be omitted,
and much less that anything should be inserted; therefore, as
to the latter, I do here renounce everything of that kind, par-
ticularly a paragraph about her majesty Queen Anne, of most
pious and glorious memory, although I did reverence and
esteem her more than any of human species. But you, or your
interpolator, ought to have considered, that as it was not my in-
clination, so it was not decent to praise any animal of our com-
position before my master Houyhnhnm; and, besides, the fact
was altogether false; for to my knowledge, being in England
during some part of her majesty's reign, she did govern by a
chief minister; nay, even by two successively, the first whereof
was the lord of Godolphin, and the second the lord of Oxford;
so that you have made me say the thing that was not. Like-
wise, in the account of the academy of projectors, and several
passages of my discourse to my master Houyhnhnm, you have
either omitted some material circumstances, or minced or
changed them in such a manner, that I do hardly know my
own work. When I formerly hinted to you something of this
in a letter, you were pleased to answer, "That you were afraid
of giving offence; that people in power were very watchful
over the press, and apt not only to interpret, but to punish
everything which looked like an innuendo" (as I think you
(39)
54
A LETTER from GULLIVER
call it). But, pray, how could that which I spoke so many
years ago, and at above five thousand leagues distance, in
another reign, be applied to any of the Yahoos who now are
said to govern the herd; especially at a time when I little
thought or feared the unhappiness of living under them? Have
not I the most reason to complain, when I see these very
Yahoos carried by Houyhnhnms in a vehicle, as if they were
brutes, and those the rational creatures? And, indeed, to
avoid so monstrous and detestable a sight was one principal
motive of my retirement hither.
Thus much I thought proper to tell you in relation to your-
self, and to the trust I reposed in you.
I do, in the next place, complain of my own great want of
judgment, in being prevailed upon, by the entreaties and false
reasonings of you and some others, very much against my own
opinion, to suffer my Travels to be published. Pray bring to
your mind how often I desired you to consider, when you
insisted on the motive of public good, that the Yahoos were a
species of animals utterly incapable of amendment by precepts
or example; and so it has proved; for, instead of seeing a full
stop put to all abuses and corruptions, at least in this little
island, as I had reason to expect; behold, after six months'
warning, I cannot learn that my book has produced one single
effect according to my intentions. I desired you would let me
know by a letter, when the party and faction were extinguished;
judges learned and upright; pleaders honest and modest, with
some tincture of common sense, and Smithfield blazing with
pyramids of law books; the young nobility's education entirely
changed; the physicians banished; the female Yahoos abound-
ing in virtue, honor, truth; and good sense; courts and levees
of great ministers thoroughly weeded and swept; wit, merit,
and learning rewarded; all disgracers of the press, in prose
and verse, condemned to eat nothing but their own cotton, and
quench their thirst with their own ink. These, and a thousand
other reformations, I firmly counted upon by your encourage-
ment; as, indeed, they were plainly deducible from the pre-
cepts delivered in my book. And it must be owned, that seven
months were a sufficient time to correct every vice and folly to
which Yahoos are subject, if their natures had been capable of
the least disposition to virtue or wisdom. Yet, so far have you
been from answering my expectation in any of your letters,
that, on the contrary, you are loading our carrier every week
with libels, and keys, and reflections, and memoirs, and second
parts; wherein I see myself accused of reflecting upon great
LO HIS COUSIN SYMPSON.
55
state folks; of degrading human nature (for so they have still
the confidence to style it), and of abusing the female sex. I
find, likewise, that the writers of those bundles are not agreed
among themselves; for some of them will not allow me to be
the author of my own Travels, and others make me author of
books to which I am wholly a stranger.
I find, likewise, that your printer has been so careless as to
confound the times and mistake the dates of my several voy-
ages and returns, neither assigning the true year, nor the true
month, nor day of the month,* and I hear the original manu-
script is all destroyed since the publication of my book; neither
have I any copy ieft. However, I send you some corrections
which you may insert if ever there should be a second edition;
and yet I cannot stand to them, but shall leave that matter to
my judicious and candid readers to adjust it as they please.
I hear some of our sea Yahoos find fault with my sea lan-
guage as not proper in many parts nor now in use.t I cannot
help it. In my first voyage, while I was young, I was in-
structed by the oldest mariners, and learned to speak as they
did. But I have since found that the sea Yahoos are apt, like
the land ones, to become newfangled in their words, which the
latter change every year; insomuch as I remember, upon
each return to my own country, their old dialect was so altered
that I could hardly understand the new. And I observe, when
any Yahoos come from London, out of curiosity, to visit me at
my house, we nether of us are able to deliver our conceptions
in a manner inte:ligible to the other.
If the censure of the Yahoos could in any way affect me, I
should have great reason to complain that some of them are
so bold as to thank my book of Travels a mere fiction out of
mine own brain, and have gone so far as to drop hints that the
Houyhnhnms and Yahoos have no more existence than the in-
habitants of Utucia.
Indeed, I must confess that as to the people of Lilliput,
Brobdingrag (for so the word should have been spelt, and not
That the origina opy of these Travels was altered by the person through whose
hands it was conveyed * the
the press is fact, but the passages of which Mr. Gulliver com-
plains in this letter are be found only in the first edition; for the Dean, having restored
the text wherever it has seen altered, sent the copy to the late Mr. Motte by the hands of
Mr. Charies Ford. The copy has been exactly followed in every subsequent edition, ex-
cept that printed in Irend by Mr. Faulkner, the editor of which, supposing the Dean te
be serious when b rtioned the corruptions of dates, and yet finding them unaltered,
thought fit to alte
which he has not
that were perfect, he
awayth.
himself. There is, however, scarce one of these alterations in
ed a blunder; though while he was thus busy in defacing the parts
suffered the accidental blemishes of others to remain.-Hawkes
• ❤ the account of he storm at the commencement of the second voyage.
50
A LETTER FROM GUILLITER
erroneously, Brobdingnag), and Laputa, I have never yet heard
of any Yahoo so presumptuous as to dispute their being or the
facts I have related concerning them, because the truth im-
mediately strikes every reader with conviction. And is there
less probability in my account of the Houyhnhnms or Yahoos
when it is manifest as to the latter, there are so many thou-
sands, even in this country, who only differ from their brother
brutes in Houyhnhnm-land, because they use a sort of jabber
and do not go naked? I wrote for their amendment and not
their approbation. The united praise of the whole race would
be of less consequence to me than the neighing of those two
degenerate Houyhnhnms I keep in my stable, because from
these, degenerate as they are, I still improve in some virtues
without any mixture of vice.
Do these miserable animals presume to think that I am so
degenerated as to defend my veracity? Yahoo as I am, it is
well known through all Houyhnhnm-land, that, by the instruc-
tions and example of my illustrious master, I was able, in the
compass of two years (although, I confess, with the utmost
difficulty), to remove that infernal habit of lying, shuffling,
deceiving, and equivocating, so deeply rooted in the very souls
of all my species, especially the Europeans.
I have other complaints to make upon this vexatious occa-
sion, but I forbear troubling myself or you any further. I
must freely confess, that, since my last, some corruptions of
my Yahoo nature have revived in me, by conversing with a few
of your species, and particularly those of my own family, by an
unavoidable necessity, else I should never have attempted so
absurd a project as that of reforming the Yahoo race in this
kingdom; but I have now done with all such visionary schemes
forever.
April 2, 1727.
A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT.•
CHAPTER I
THE AUTHOR GIVES SOME ACCOUNT OF HIMSELF AND FAMI
∙HIS FIRST INDUCEMENTS TO TRAVEL—HE IS SHIPWRECKED,
AND SWIMS FOR HIS LIFE-GETS SAFE ON SHORE IN THE
COUNTRY OF LILLIPUT-IS MADE A PRISONER, AND CAR
RIED UP THE COUNTRY.
My father had a small estate in Nottinghamshire; I was
the third of five sons. He sent me to Emanuel College in
Cambridge, at fourteen years old, where I resided three years,
and applied myself close to my studies; but the charge of
maintaining me, although I had very scanty allowance, being
* Gulliver's Travels were originally designed to form part of a satire on the Abuse of
Human Learning, projected by Pope, Swift, and Arbuthnot. In their joint publication, the
"Memoirs of Martinus Scriblerus," the sketch of the work is thus given by Pope :
"L
It was in the year 1699, that Martin set out on his travels. Thou wilt certainly be
very curious to know what they were. It is not yet time to inform thee; but what hints I
am at liberty to give I will.
"Thou shalt know, then, that in his first voyage he was carried by a prosperous storm te
a discovery of the ancient Pygmean empire.
"That, his second, he was happily shipwrecked on the land of the Giants, the most
humane people in the world.
**
That, in his third, he discovered a whole kingdom of philosophers, who govern by the
niathematics; with whose admirable schemes and projects he returned to benefit his own
dear country; but had the misfortune to find them rejected by the envious ministers of
Queen Anne, and himself sent treacherously away.
"And hence it is that in his fourth voyage he discovers a vein of melancholy, proceeding
almost to a disgust of his species; but above all, a mortal detestation of the whole flagitious
race of ministers, and a final resolution not to give in any memorial to the Secretary of
State, in order to subject the lands he discovered to the crown of Great Britain.
&A
Now, if by these hints the reader can help himself to a farther discovery of the nature
and contents of these travels, he is welcome to as much light as they afford him: I am
obliged by all the ties of honor, not to speak more openly."
Pope, however, appears to have been displeased at the substitution of Lemuel Gullive
for Martinus Scriblerus; he adds rather ill-naturedly:
"But if any man shall see such very extraordinary voyages, which manifest the mos
distinguishing marks of a philosopher, a politician, and a legislator, and can imagine them ti
belong to a surgeon of a ship, or a captain of a merchantman, let him remain in his ignor
"}
ance.
Swift himself thus announces the approaching appearance of the work in a letter to Pope,
dated Dublin, September 29th, 1725; "I have employed my time (besides ditching) in
(5%)
58
.00
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
too great for a narrow fortune, I was bound apprentice to Mr.
James Bates, an eminent surgeon in London, with whom I con-
tinued four years; and my father now and then sending me
small sums of money, I laid them out in learning navigation,
and other parts of the mathematics, useful to those who intend
to travel, as I always believed it would be, some time or other,
my fortune to do. When I left Mr. Bates, I went down to my
father; where, by the assistance of him and my uncle John,
and some other relations, I got forty pounds, and a promise of
thirty pounds a year to maintain me at Leyden; there I studied
physic two years and seven months, knowing it would be use-
ful to me in long voyages. Soon after my return from Leyden,
I was recommended by my good master, Mr. Bates, to be sur-
geon to the Swallow, Captain Abraham Pannell, commander;
with whom I continued three years and a half, making a voy-
age or two into the Levant, and some other parts. When I
came back I resolved to settle in London; to which Mr. Bates,
my master, encouraged me, and by him I was recommended to
several patients. I took part of a small house in the Old
Jewry; and being advised to alter my condition, I married Miss
Mary Burton, second daughter to Mr. Edmund Burton, hosier,
in Newgate Street, with whom I received four hundred pounds
for a portion.*
•
finishing, correcting, amending, and transcribing my Travels, in four parts complete, newly
augmented, and intended for the press when the world shall deserve them, or rather when a
printer shall be found bold enough to venture his ears.'
The existence of a nation of pigmies was firmly believed in ancient times. The diminu-
ve race is mentioned by Herodotus, Aristotle, Pliny, and even by some of the earlier modern
wavellers. The following account is from Ctesias, who was contemporary with Xenophon:
“In th~ middle of India there are black men called pigmies, using the same language as the
other I dians, they are very little, the tallest of them being but two cubits, and most of
them but tubit and a half high. They have very long hair, reaching down to their knees
and lower; and a beard larger than any man's. After their beards are grown long they wear
no clothes, but the hair of their head falls behind, a great deal below their hams, and that
of their beard before comes down to their feet; then laying their hair thick all about their
body, they afterwards gird themselves, making use of their hair for clothes.
They are flat-nosed and il-favored. Their sheep are like lambs, and their oxen and asses
scarce as big as rams, and their horses and mules, and all their other cattle, not oigger.
Three thousand of these pigmies are household troops in the service of the king of India.
They are good archers. They are very just, and use the same laws as the Indians do.”
Some of the old commentators on the Bible translated the word Gammachia, pigmies,
and it is so rendered in the Vulgate. "This circumstance," as Sir Thomas Browne re-
marks, in his " Enquiries into Vulgar Errors," "tended greatly to confirm the popular be-
lief in the existence of this fabulous race.” Viewed as a mere fiction, the account of Lilli-
ut did not appear so extravagant in Swift's days as it does in ours. Every one has heard
he story of the Irish bishop, a very learned man, who, having read the voyage to Lilliput,
said that "there were some things in it which he could not believe."
After the publication of the Travels, Swift was much amused to find that Gulliver was a
real name, and that a Mr. Jonathan Guliver was a member of the House of Representa-
tives in Boston. An American writer adds that this Jonathan deemed it necessary to dis-
laim publicly all connection with Lemuel.
Swift and Defoe are unrivaled in the art of introducing trifling and minute circum-
stances which give an air of reality to their fictitious narratives. In Gulliver's early history,
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
59
But my good master Bates dying in two years after, and I
having few friends, my business began to fail; for my conscience
would not suffer me to imitate the bad practice of too many
among my brethren. Having, therefore, consulted with my
wife and some of my acquaintance, I determined to go again
to sea. I was surgeon successively in two ships, and made
several voyages, for six years, to the East and West Indies, by
which I got some addition to my fortune. My hours of leisure
I spent in reading the best authors, ancient and modern, being
always provided with a good number of books; and when I
was ashore, in observing the manners and dispositions of the
people, as well as learning their language, wherein I had a
great facility, by the strength of my memory.
The last of these voyages not proving very fortunate, I grew
weary of the sea, and intended to stay at home with my wife
and family. I removed from the Old Jewry to Fetter Lane,
and from thence to Wapping, hoping to get business among the
sailors, but it would not turn to account. After three years'
expectation that things would mend, I accepted an advanta-
geous offer from Captain William Prichard, master of the Ante-
lope, who was making a voyage to the South Sea. We set
sail from Bristol, May 4, 1699, and our voyage at first was very
prosperous.
It would not be proper, for some reasons, to trouble the
reader with the particulars of our adventures in those seas; let
it suffice to inform him, that in our passage from thence to the
East Indies, we were driven by a violent storm to the north-
west of Van Diemen's Land.*
By an observation, we found
ourselves in the latitude of 30 degrees 2 minutes south. Twelve
as in that of Crusoe, persons are casually mentioned of whom we hear nothing more. Gulli-
ver's uncle, like Crusoe's brother, only comes on the stage to disappear again forever. This is
quite contrary to the usual course of romance writers, who rarely introduce a personage or
an incident that does not in some way aid the development of the plot. Sir Walter Scott
suggests that Swift probably imitated Defoe in this particular, but the ideal character of
Gulliver naturally led the Dean to introduce these petty particulars. He designed to por
tray Gulliver as kind of second Dampier, uniting the homely sense and prejudices of a
true-born Englishman to the acquired wisdom of a life of adventures. There is a sailor's
bluntness and ankness in everything that Gulliver teils us of himself and family; the occa
sional minuteness and even coarseness of the personal details are faithfully taken from the
journals of the early English voyagers, whose accounts of their discoveries are strangely
blended with the most trifling particulars respecting their food, clothing, etc. The character
of Gulliver is that of a thorough English sailor; his education at Leyden did not raise him
too high above the rude tars with whom he mingled, and we always find his learning brought
forward with difficulty, and by an effort, while his mother-wit and sailor's courage are pres-
ent in every emergency.
* This island was first discovered A.D. 1633, by Abel Janson Tasman, a Dutch naviga-
tor, who called it Van Diemen's Land, after the governor of Batavia, by whom he had been
sent to examine the Southern Ocean. Tasman's narrative was very loose and inaccurate,
so that Swift might people the seas which that navigator traversed with any creatures he
pleased.
60
GULLIVERS TRAVELS
of our crew were dead by ime oderate labor and ill food; the
rest were in a very weak condition. On the 5th of Novem-
ber, which was the beginning of the summer in those parts, the
weather being very hazy, the seamen spied a rock within half
a cable's length of the ship, but the wind was so strong that we
were driven directly upon it, and immediately split. Six of the
crew, of whom I was one, having let down the boat into the sea,
made a shift to get clear of the ship and the rock. We rowed,
by my computation, about three leagues, till we were able to
work no longer, being already spent with labor while we were in
the ship. We therefore trusted ourselves to the mercy of the
waves, and in about half an hour the boat were overset by a
sudden flurry from the north. What became of my compan-
ions in the boat, as well as of those who escaped on the rock,
or were left in the vessel, I cannot tell, but conclude they were
all lost. For my own part, I swam as fortune directed me, and
was pushed forward by wind and tide. I often let my legs
drop, but could feel no bottom, but when I was almost gone,
and able to struggle no longer, I found myself within my depth;
and by this time the storm was much abated. The declivity
was so small, that I walked near a mile before I got to the
shore, which I conjectured was about eight o'clock in the eve-
ning. I then advanced forward near half a mile, but could not
discover any sign of houses or inhabitants; at least I was in
so weak a condition that I did not observe them. I was ex-
tremely tired, and with that, and the heat of the weather, and
about half a pint of brandy that I drank as I left the ship, 1
found myself much inclined to sleep. I lay down on the grass,
which was very short and soft, where I slept sounder than ever
I remember to have done in my life, and, as I reckoned, about
nine hours; for when I awakened, it was just daylight. I at-
tempted to rise, but was not able to stir; for, as I happened to
lie on my back, I found my arms and legs were strongly fastened
on each side to the ground; and my hair, which was long and
thick, tied down in the same manner. I likewise felt several slen
der ligatures across my body, from my arm-pits to my thighs. I
could only look upwards; the sun began to grow hot, and the
light offended my eyes. I heard a confused noise about me;
but in the posture I lay, could see nothing except the sky. In
A little time, I felt something alive moving on my left leg,
which advancing gently forward over my breast, came almost
up to my chin, when bending my eyes downward as much as I
could, I perceived it to be a human creature not six inches
high with bow and arrow in his hands, and a quiver at his
GÜLLIVER'S TRAVELS
¿¡
ame
back.* In the mean time I felt at least forty more of the
kind (as I conjectured) following the first. I was in the most
astonishment, and roared so loud that they all ran back in fright;
and some of them, as I was afterwards told, were hurt by the
talls they got by leaping from my sides upon the ground. How
ever, they soon returned, and one of them, who ventured so far
as to get a full sight of my face, lifting up his hands and eyes
by way of admiration, cried out in a shrill but distinct voice,
Hekinah degul! The others repeated the same words several
times, but I then knew not what it meant.
I lay all this while, as the reader may believe, in great un-
easiness; at length, struggling to get loose, I had the fortune
to break the strings, and wrench out the pegs that fastened my
left arm to the ground, for, by lifting it up to my face, I discov-
ered the methods they had taken to bind me, and at the same
time with a violent pull, which gave me excessive pain, I a little
loosened the strings that tied down my hair on the left side,
so that I was just able to turn my head about two inches.
But the creatures ran off a second time, before I could seize
them; whereupon there was a great shout in a very shrill ac-
cent, and after it had ceased I heard one of them cry aloud,
Tolgo phonac; when in an instant I felt above a hundred arrows
discharged on my left hand, which pricked me like so many
needles; and besides they shot another flight into the air, as
we do bombs in Europe, whereof many, I suppose, fell on my
body (though I felt them not, and some on my face, which I
immediately covered with my left hand. When this shower of
arrows was over, I fell a groaning with grief and pain, and then
striving again to get loose, they discharged another volley larger
than the first, and some of them attempted with spears to stick
me in the sides; but by good luck I had on me a buff jerkin,
which they could not pierce. I thought it the most prudent
method to lie still, and my design was to continue so till night,
when, my left hand being already loose, I could easily free my
self and as for the inhabitants, I had reason to believe I might
be a match for the greatest army they could bring against me, if
they were all of the same size with him that I saw. But for-
66
* This incident is taken from Philostratus. (Icon. lib. ii. p. 817.) The pigmies," he
says, were anxious to revenge the death of Antæus, and having found Hercules napping
in Libya, they mustered up all their forces against him. One phalanx assaulted his left
hand, but against his right hand, that being the stronger, two phalanges were appointed.
The archers and slingers besieged his feet, admiring the hugeness of his thighs; but against
his head, as the arsenal, they raised batteries, the king himself taking his post there. They
set fire to his hair, put reaping-hooks in his eyes; and that he might not breathe, fixed doors
to his mouth and nostrils. But all the execution that they could do was only to awake him ;
and when this was done, deriding their folly, he gathered them all up into his lion's skir;
and carried them (Philostratus thinks) to Euristhenes.”
62
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
tune disposed otherwise of me. When the people observed I
was quite, they discharged no more arrows; but, by the noise
I heard, I knew their numbers increased; and about four yards
from me, over against my right ear, I heard a knocking for
above an hour, like that of people at work; when turning my
head that way, as well as the pegs and strings would permit
me, I saw a stage erected about a foot and a half from the
ground, capable of holding four of the inhabitants, with two
or three ladders to mount it: from whence one of them, who
seemed to be a person of quality, made me a long speech,
whereof I understood, not a syllable.* But I should have
mentioned, that before the principal person began his oration,
he cried out three times, Langro dehul san (these words and
former were afterwards repeated and explained to me). Where-
upon, immediately about fifty of the inhabitants came and cut
the string that fastened the left side of my head, which gave
me the liberty of turning it to the right, and of observing the
person and gesture of him that was to speak. He appeared to
be of middle age, and taller than any of the other three who
attended him, whercof one was a page that held up his train,
and seemed to be somewhat longer than my middle finger; the
other two stood one on each side to support him. He acted
every part of an orator, and I could observe many periods of
Moore he made a very amusing use of this incident, in an ode to Sir Hudson Lowe,
which is tours A to be passed over with a mere reference.
Sir Hudson Lowe, Sir Hudson Low,
(By name, and ah! by nature so),
As thou art fond of persecutions;
Perhaps thou'st read, or heard repeated,
How Captain Gulliver was treated,
When thrown among the Lilliputians.
They tied him down-these tittle men did-
And having valiantly ascended
Upon the mighty man's protuberance,
They did so strut! Upon my soul,
It must have been extremely droll
To see their pigmy pride's exuberance !
And how the doughty mannikins
Amused themselves with sticking pins
And needles in the great man's breeches;
And how some very little things
That pass'd for lords, on scaffoldings
Got up and worried him with speeches.
Alas! alas! that it should happen,
To mighty men to be caught napping;
Though different to these persecutions;
For Gulliver there took the nap
While here, the Nap-ah, sad mishap I-
Is taken by the Lilliputians.
GULINER'S TRAVELS.
63
threatenings, and others promises, pity, and kindness. I an-
swered in a few words, but in the most submissive manner,
lifting up my left hand and both my eyes to the sun, as calling
him for a witness; and being almost famished with hunger, not
having eaten a morsel for some hours before I left the ship, I
found the demands of nature so strong upon me that I could
not forbear showing my impatience (perhaps against the strict
rules of decency), by putting my finger frequently to my mouth,
to signify that I wanted food. The hurgo (for so they call a
great lord, as I afterwards learned) understood me very well.
He descended from the stage, and commanded that several lad-
ders should be applied to my sides, on which above a hundred
of the inhabitants mounted, and walked towards my mouth,
laden with baskets full of meat, which had been provided and
sent thither by the king's orders, upon the first intelligence he
received of me. I observed there was the flesh of several ani-
mals, but could not distinguish them by the taste. There were
shoulders, legs and loins, shaped like those of mutton, and very
well dressed, but smaller than the wings of a lark. I ate them
by two or three at a mouthful, and took three loaves at a time
about the bigness of musket-bullets. They supplied me as fast
as they could, showing a thousand marks of wonder and as-
tonishment at my bulk and appetite.
I than made another sign that I wanted drink. They found
by my eating that a small quantity would not suffice me; and
being a most ingenious people, they slung up, with great dex-
terity, one of their largest hogsheads, then rolled it towards my
hand, and beat out the top; I drank it off at a draught, which
I might well do, for it did not hold half a pint, and tasted like
a small wine of Burgundy, but much more delicious. They
brought me a second hogshead, which I drank in the same
manner, and made signs for more: but they had none to give
me. When I had performed these wonders they shouted for
joy, and danced upon my breast, repeating several times as
they did, at first, Hekinah degul. They made me a sign that I
should throw down the two hogsheads, but first warning the
people below to stand out of the way crying aloud, Borach
mevolah: and when they saw the vessels in the air there was a
* In the excitement that followed the Revolution, public speaking became more common
in England than it had ever been before, and several of the Whig lords rendered efficient
service to the cause of the Hanoverian succession, by their speeches at county meetings.
Swift despised and hated these itinerant orators, to whose exertions the overthrow of his
party was mainly owing, and it is prob-b that in this description he alludes to some partic
lar leader of the Whig party who was remarkable for his addresses to popular assemblies.
Sir Robert Walpole after his expulsion from Parliament was an active agitator among
the
Whigs, and was not less formidable to Harley and Bolingbroke, outside the walls of the
House of Commons, than he had been as a leader of parliamentary opposition.
64
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
universal shout of Hekinah degul. I confess I was often tempt-
ed, while they were passing backwards and forwards on my
body, to seize forty or fifty of the first that came in my reach
and dash them against the ground. But the remembrance of
what I had felt, which probably might not be the worst they
could do, and the promise of honor I made to them-for so I
interpreted my submissive behavior-soon drove out these im-
aginations. Besides, I now considered myself as bound by
the laws of hospitality, to a people who had treated me with so
much expense and magnificence. However, in my thoughts I
could not sufficiently wonder at the intrepidity of these diminu-
tive mortals, who durst venture to mount and walk upon my body
while one of my hands was at liberty, without trembling at the
very sight of so prodigious a creature as I must appear to
them. After some time, when they observed that I made no
more demands for meat, there appeared before me a person of
high rank from his imperial majesty. His excellency, having
mounted on the small of my right leg, advanced forwards up to
my face, with about a dozen of his retinue, and producing his
credentials under the signet royal, which he applied close to
my eyes, spoke about ten minutes without any signs of anger,
but with a kind of determinate resolution; often pointing for-
wards, which, as I afterwards found, was towards the capital
city, about half a mile distant, whether it was agreed by his
majesty in council that I must be conveyed. I answered in
few words but to no purpose, and made a sign with my hand
that was loose, putting it to the other (but over his excellency's
head for fear of hurting him or his train), and then to my own
head and body, to signify that I desired my liberty.
It appeared that he understood me well enough, for he shook
his head by way of disapprobation, and held his hands in a
posture to show that I must be carried as a prisoner. How-
ever, he made other signs, to let me understand that I should
have meat and drink enough, and very good treatment.
Whereupon I once more thought of attempting to break my
bonds; but again, when I felt the smart of their arrows upon
my face and hands, which were all in blisters, and many of the
darts still sticking in them, and observing likewise that the
number of my enemies increased, I gave tokens to let them
know that they might do with me what they pleased. Upon
this, the hurgo and his train withdrew, with much civility and
cheerful countenances. Soon after I heard a general shout,
with frequent repetitions of the words, Peplom selan; and I felt
great numbers of people on my left side relaxing the cords to
E
GULLIVER's travelS
such a degree that I was able to turn upon my right, and to
ease myself with making water; which I very plentifully did, to
the great astonishment of the people; who, conjecturing by my
motion what I was going to do, immediately opened to the right
and left on that side, to avoid the torrent, which fell with such
noise and violence from me. But, before this, they had daubed
my face and both my hands, with a sort of ointment, very
pleasant to the smell, which, in a few minutes, removed all the
smart of their arrows. These circumstances, added to the
refreshment I had received by their victuals and drink, which
were very nourishing, disposed me to sleep. I slept about
eight hours, as I was afterwards assured; and it was no wonder,
for the physicians, by the emperor's order, had mingled a sleepy
potion in the hogsheads of wine.
It seems, that upon the first moment I was discovered
sleeping on the ground, after my tanding, the emperor had
early notice of it by an express; and determined in council,
that I should be tied in the manner I have related (which was
done in the night while I slept), that plenty of meat and drink
should be sent me, and a machine prepared to carry me to the
capital city. This resolution perhaps may appear very bold
and dangerous, and I am confident would not be imitated by
any prince in Europe on the like occasion. However, in my
opinion, it was extremely prudent, as well as generous: for,
supposing these people had endeavored to kill me with their
spears and arrows, while I was asleep, I should certainly have
awaked with the first sense of smart, which might have so far
aroused my rage and strength as to have enabled me to break
the strings wherewith I was tied; after which, as they were
not able to make resistance, so they could expect no mercy.
These people are most excellent mathematicians, and ar
rived to a great perfection in mechanics by the countenance
and encouragement of the emperor, who is a renowned patron
of learning. This prince has several machines fixed on wheels,
for the carriage of trees and other great weights. He often
builds his largest men of war, whereof some are nine feet long,
in the woods where the timber grows, and has them carried on
these engines three or four hundred yards to the sea. Five
hundred carpenters and engineers were immediately set at
work to prepare the greatest engine they had. It was a frame
of wood raised three inches from the ground, seven feet long
and four wide, moving upon twenty-two wheels. The shout I
heard was upon the arrival of this engine, which, it seems, set
out in four hours after my landing. It was brought parallel to
*
50
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
me. as I lay. But the principal difficulty was to raise and
place me in this vehicle Eighty poles, each of one foot high,
were erected for this purpose, and very strong cords, of the
bigness of packthread, were tastened by hooks to many band-
ages, which the workmen had girt round my neck, my hands,
my body, and my legs. Nine hundred of the strongest men
were employed to draw up these cords, by many pulleys fas-
tened on the poles, and thus, in less than three hours, I was
raised and slung into the engine, and there tied fast.* Al'
this I was told; for, while the operation was performing, I la
in a profound sleep, by the force of that soporiferous medicine
infused into my liquor. Fifteen hundred of the emperor's
largest horses, each about four inches and a half high, were
employed to draw me towards the metropolis, which, as I said,
was half a mile distant.
About four hours after we began our journey, I awaked by
a very ridiculous accident; for the carriage being stopped
awhile, to adjust something that was out of order, two or three
of the young natives had the curiosity to see how I looked when
I was asleep; they climbed up into the engine, and advancing
very softly to my face, one of them, an officer in the guards,
put the sharp end of his half-pike a good way up into my left
nostril, which tickled my nose like a straw, and made me sneeze
violently; whereupon they stole off, unperceived, and it was
three weeks before I knew the cause of my awaking so sud-
denly. We made a long march the remaining part of the day,
and rested at night with five hundred guards on each side of
me, half with torches, and half with bows and arrows, ready to
shoot me, if I should offer to stir. The next morning, at sun-
rise, we continued our march, and arrived within two hundred
yards of the city gates about noon. The emperor, and all his
court, came out to meet us; but his great officers would by no
means suffer his majesty to endanger his person, by mounting
on my body.
At the place where the carriage stopped, there stood an
ancient temple, esteemed to be the largest in the whole king.
dom, which, having been polluted some years before by an un-
natural murder, was, according to the zeal of those people,
The caution of the Lilliputian courtiers is probably designed to ridicule the overacted
solicitude by which the ministers of George I. affected to protect the King from the plots of
the Jacobites. The Tories who hasted to greet the King on his landing were either refused
admittance or harshly dismissed. "Lord Harcourt, who arrived with a patent for the peer
age of the Prince of Wales, was abruptly dismissed; the Duke of Ormond, who was hasten-
ing to Greenwich, was forbidden to appear in the royal presence; and Lord Oxford, who
had shown more joy in proclaiming the King than his friends thought respectful towards the
late Queen, was barely admitted in the crowd to kiss the King's hand."-Lord 7. Russell's
Affairs of Europe, vol. 1. p. 308,
GULLIVEK'S TRAVELS.
62
looked upon as profane, and therefore had been applied to
common use, and all the ornaments and furniture carried away.
In this edifice, it was determined I should lodge. The great
gate, fronting to the north, was about four feet high, and almost
two feet wide, through which I could easily creep. On each
side of the gate was a small window, not above six inches from
the ground, into that on the left side the king's smith conveyed
fourscore and eleven chains, like those that hang to a lady's
watch in Europe, and almost as large, which were locked to
my left leg with six-and-thirty padlocks. Over against this
temple, on the other side of the great highway, at twenty feet
distance, there was a turret at least five feet high. Here the
emperor ascended, with many principal lords of his court, to
have an opportunity of viewing me, as I was told, for I could
not see them. It was reckoned that above an hundred thou-
sand inhabitants came out of the town upon the same errand;
and, in spite of my guards, I believe there could not be fewer
than ten thousand, at several times, who mounted my body, by
the help of ladders. But a proclamation was soon issued, to
forbid it, upon pain of death. When the workmen found it was
impossible for me to break loose, they cut all the strings that
bound me; whereupon I rose up, with as melancholy a dispo-
sition as ever I had in my life. But the noise and astonishment
of the people, at seeing me rise and walk, are not to be ex-
pressed. The chains that held my left leg were about two
yards long, and gave me not only the liberty of walking back-
wards and forwards in a semicircle, but, being fixed within four
inches of the gate, allowed me to creep in, and lie at my full
length in the temple.
68
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
CHAPTER II.
THE EMPEROR OF LILLIPUT, ATTENDED BY SEVERAL OF THE
NOBILITY, COMES TO SEE THE AUTHOR IN HIS CONFINE-
MENT THE EMPEROR'S PERSON AND HABITS DESCRIBED—
LEARNED MEN APPOINTED TO TEACH THE AUTHOR THEIR
LANGUAGE HE GAINS FAVOR BY HIS MILD DISPOSITION-
HIS POCKETS ARE SEARCHED, AND HIS SWORD AND PIS-
TOLS TAKEN FROM HIM.
WHEN I found myself on my feet, I looked about me, and
must confess I never beheld a more entertaining prospect.
The country around appeared like a continued garden, and
the inclosed fields, which were generally forty feet square, re-
sembled so many beds of flowers. These fields were inter-
mingled with woods of half a stang,* and the tallest trees, as I
could judge, appeared to be seven feet high. I viewed the
town on my left hand, which looked like the painted scene of
a city in a theatre.
I had been for some hours extremely tired, however, so I
crept into my house and shut the door after me. But it was of
no use to try to get rid of so much company. I had to come
out again, and, to get a little change by stepping backwards
and forwards as far as my chains allowed. I soon found that
the emperor had descended from the tower, and advancing on
horseback towards me, which had like to have cost him dear;
for the beast, though very well trained, yet wholly unused to
such a sight, which appeared as if a mountain moved before
him, reared up on his hinder feet; but that prince, who is an
excellent horseman, kept his seat, till his attendants ran in,
and held the bridle, while his majesty had time to dismount.
When he alighted, he surveyed me round with great admira
tion; but kept beyond the length of my chain. He ordered
his cooks and butlers, who were already prepared, to give me
victuals and drink, which they pushed forward in a sort of
vehicles upon wheels, till I could reach them. I took these
vehicles, and soon emptied them all: twenty of them were
filled with meat, and ten with liquor; each of the former
afforded me two or three good mouthfuls; and I emptied the
* An old word for a perch, sixteen feet and a half. These small woods were therefore
eight feet and a quarter,
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
69
For
liquor of ten vessels which was contained in earthen vials, into
one vehicle, drinking it off at a draught; and so I did with the
rest.. The empress and young princes of the blood of both
sexes, attended by many ladies, sat at some distance in their
chairs: but, upon the accident that happened to the emperor's
horse, they alighted, and came near his person, which I am
now going to describe. He is taller, by almost the breadth of
my nail, than any of his court; which alone is enough to strike
an awe into the beholders. His features are strong and mas-
culine, with an Austrian lip, and arched nose; his complexion
olive, his countenance erect, his body and limbs well propor-
tioned, all his motions graceful, and his deportment ma-
jestic. He was then past his prime, being twenty-eight
years and three-quarters old, of which he had reigned
about seven in great felicity, and generally victorious.*
the better convenience of beholding him, I lay on my side, so
that my face was parallel to his, and he stood but three yards
off: however, I have had him since many times in my hand,
and therefore cannot be deceived in the description. His
dress was very plain and simple, and the fashion of it between
the Asiatic and the European; but he had on his head a light
helmet of gold, adorned with jewels, and a plume on the crest.
He held his sword drawn in his hand to defend himself, if I
should happen to break loose: it was almost three inches
long; the hilt and scabbard were gold enriched with diamonds.
His voice was shrill, but very clear and articulate; and I could
distinctly hear it when I stood up. The ladies and courtiers
were all most magnificently clad; so that the spot they stood
upon seemed to resemble a petticoat spread on the ground,
embroidered with figures of gold and silver. His imperial
* There can be little room for doubting that in the description of the emperor of Lilli-
put, Swift dimly shadowed forth some leading traits in the character of George I. The
points of direct resemblance, however, for obvious reasons, are very few; it is only by
collecting all the incidents recorded of the Lilliputian emperor, that we find out his general
similarity to the first monarch of the house of Brunswick. The following account of
George I. will enable the reader to discover the most prominent points of identity in the
two portraits. "George I. ascended the English throne in his fifty-fifth year, when men are
usually more disposed to acquiesce in the settled routine than venture on novel and perhaps
troublesome experiments. Moreover the natural disposition and understanding of the
King were not of a kind at any period of his life to carry him out of the established orbit.
He was a person of as simple tastes as appearance; in England he was a stranger; his
home being Hanover. He naturally inclined to the seclusion of a private station, being
shy and reserved in public, but easy and facetious among his intimates. During the four-
teen years of his government of the electorate, he had acquired the reputation of a just and
circumspect prince, who well understood and steadily pursued his own interests, and would
have been well content to end his days in the petty sovereignty of his ancestors, had not the
ambition of others been greater than his own. Punctual in business, he was more dull than
indolent; and the plain honey of his temper, joined with the narrow notions of a low
education, made him look upon his acceptance of the crown as an act of usurpation, which
was always uneasy to him. He had no taste for literature or the arts, and was very pary
monious. Wade's British History, p. 336
70
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
majesty spoke often to me, and I returned answers: but
neither of us could understand a syllable. There were several
of his priests and lawyers present (as I conjectured by their
habits), who were commanded to address themselves to me;
and I spoke to them in as many languages as I had the least
smattering of, which were High and Low Dutch, Latin, French,
Spanish, Italian, and Lingua Franca; but all to no purpose.
After about two hours the court retired, and I was left with a
strong guard, to prevent the impertinence, and probably the
malice of the rabble; who were very impatient to crowd about
me as near as they durst; and some of them had the impud-
ence to shoot their arrows at me, as I sat on the ground by the
door of my house, whereof one very narrowly missed my left
eye. But the colonel ordered six of the ringleaders to be
seized, and thought no punishment so proper as to deliver
them bound into my hands; which some of his soldiers accord-
ingly did, pushing them forwards with the butt-ends of their
pikes into my reach. I took them all in my right hand, put
five of them into my coat-pocket, and as to the sixth, I made a
countenance as if I would eat him alive. The poor man
squalled terribly, and the colonel and his officers were in much
pain, especially when they saw me take out my penknife: but
I soon put them out of fear; for, looking mildly, and immedi-
ately cutting the strings he was bound with, I set him gently
on the ground and away he ran. I treated the rest in the
same manner, taking them one by one out of my pocket; and I
observed both the soldiers and people were highly delighted
at this mark of my clemency, which was represented very much
to my advantage at court.*
Towards night I got with some difficulty into my house,
where I lay on the ground, and continued to do so about a
fortnight; during which time, the emperor gave orders to have
a bed prepared for me. Six hundred bedst of the common
measures were brought in carriages, and worked up in my
house; a hundred and fifty of their beds, seven together, made
up the breadth and length; and these were four double; which,
however, kept me but very indifferently from the hardness of
Gulliver's history as a courtier at Lilliput is obviously designed to represent the ad-
ministration of Harley and Bolingbroke, at the close of Anne's reign. Whatever were
the other demerits of that cabinet, it must be confessed that they showed more tenderness
to the party by which they were opposed, and greater clemency to political delinquents than
their successors. This forbearance, especially in the case of libellers, is very ingeniously
intimated by Gulliver's granting pardon to the malicious archers. Swift used frequently to
remark that Anne was the only sovereign during whose entire reign no one suffered the
penalties of high treason.
↑ Gulliver has observed great exactness in the just proportion and appearance of the
chiects thus lessened.—Orrer.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
the floor, that was of smooth stone. By the same computa-
tion they provided me with sheets, blankets, and coverlets,
tolerable enough for one who had been so long inured to hard-
ships.
71
As the news of my arrival spread through the kingdom, it
brought prodigious numbers of rich, idle, and curious people to
see me; so that the villages were almost emptied; and great
neglect of tillage and household affairs must have ensued, if his
imperial majesty had not provided by several proclamations and
orders of state, against this inconveniency. He directed, that
those who had already beheld me should return home, and not
presume to come within fifty yards of my house, without
license from the court; whereby the secretaries of state got
considerable fees.
In the mean time the emperor held frequent councils, to de-
bate what course should be taken with me; and I was after-
wards assured by a particular friend, a person of great quality,
who was as much in the secret as any, that the court was under
many difficulties concerning me. They apprehended my break-
ing loose; that my diet would be very expensive, and might
cause a famine.* Sometimes they determined to starve me, or
at least to shoot me in the face and hands with poisoned arrows
which would soon dispatch me ; but again they considered, that
the stench of so large a carcass might produce a plague in the
metropolis and probably spread through the whole kingdom.
In the midst of these consultations, several officers of the army
went to the door of the great council-chamber, and two of them
being admitted, gave an account of my behavior to the six
criminals above-mentioned; which made so favorable an im-
pression in the breast of his majesty and the whole board, in
my behalf, that an imperial commission was issued out, oblig-
ing all the villages, nine hundred yards round the city, to de-
liver in every morning six beeves, forty sheep, and other victuals
for my sustenance; together with a proportionable quantity of
bread, and wine and other liquors; for the due payment of
which, his majesty gave assignments upon his treasury:-for
this prince lives chiefly upon his own demesnes: seldom, ex-
cept upon great occasions, raising any subsidies upon his sub-
jects, who are bound to attend him in his wars at their own ex
pense. An establishment was also made of six hundred persons
to be my domestics, who had board-wages allowed for their
The parsimony of George I. has been already noticed; "avarice was so predominant
in him, that he would raise no troops to secure the succession."-Wade's British History.
19. 334.
72
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
maintenance, and tents built for them very conveniently on
each side of my door. It was likewise ordered that three
hundred tailors should make me a suit of clothes, after the
fashion of the country; that six of his majesty's greatest scholars
should be employed to instruct me in their language; and lastly,
that the emperor's horses, and those of the nobility and troops
of guards, should be frequently exercised in my sight, to accus
tom themselves to me. All these orders were duly put in exe-
cution; and in about three weeks I made a great progress in
learning their language: during which time the emperor fre-
quently honored me with his visits, and was pleased to assist
my masters in teaching me. We began already to converse to-
gether in some sort; and the first words I learned, were to ex-
press my desire "that he would be pleased to give me my lib-
erty;" which I every day repeated on my knees. His answer,
as I could apprehend it, was "that this must be a work of time,
not to be thought on without the advice of his council, and that-
first I must lumos kelmin pesso desmar lon emposo;
"that is,
swear a peace with him and his kingdom: however, that I
should be used with all kindness: and he advised me
"to ac-
quire, by my patience and discreet behavior, the good opinion
of himself and his subjects." He desired "I would not take it
ill, if he gave orders to certain proper officers to search me; for
probably I might carry about me several weapons, which must
needs be dangerous things, if they answered the bulk of so pro-
digious a person." I said, "His majesty should be satisfied;
for I was ready to strip myself, and turn up my pockets before
him." This I delivered, part in words, and part in signs. He
replied, "that, by the laws of the kingdom, I must be searched
by two of his officers; that he knew this could not be done
without my consent and assistance; and he had so good an
opinion of my generosity and justice, as to trust their
persons
in my hands; that whatever they took from me, should be re-
turned when I left the country, or paid for at the rate which I
would set upon them." I took up the two officers in my hands,
put them first into my coat-pockets, and then into every other
pocket about me, except my two fobs and another secret pocket,
which I had no mind should be searched, wherein I had some
little necessaries that were of no consequence to any but my-
self. In one of my fobs there was a silver watch, and in the
other a small quantity of gold in a purse. These gentlemen,
having pen, ink, and paper about them, made an exact inventory
of everything they saw; and when they had done, desired I
would set them down, that they might deliver it to the emperor.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
73
This inventory I afterwards translated into English, and is word
for word as follows :*
"Imprimis, In the right coat-pocket of the great Man-moun
tain (for so I interpret the words quinbus flestrin), after the
strictest search, we found only one great piece of coarse cloth,
large enough to be a foot-cloth for your majesty's chief room of
state. In the left pocket we saw a huge silver chest, with a
cover of the same metal, which we, the searchers, were not able
to lift. We desired it should be opened, and one of us step-
ping into it, found himself up to the mid-leg in a sort of dust,
some part whereof flying up to our faces, set us both a-sneezing
for several times together. In his right waistcoat pocket we
found a prodigious bundle of white thin substances, folded one
over another, about the bigness of three men, tied with a strong
cable, and marked with black figures; which we humbly con-
ceive to be writings, every letter almost half as large as the
palm of our hands. In the left there was a sort of engine,
from the back of which were extended twenty long poles, re-
sembling the palisadoes before your majesty's court; where-
with we conjecture the Man-mountain combs his head, for we
did not always trouble him with questions, because we found it
a great difficulty to make him understand us. In the large
pocket on the right side of his middle cover (so I translate
ranfu-lo, by which they meant my breeches), we saw a hollow
pillar of iron, about the length of a man, fastened to a strong
piece of timber larger than the pillar, and upon one side of the
pillar were huge pieces of iron sticking out, cut into strange
figures, which we know not what to make of. In the left pocket
another engine of the same kind. In the smaller pocket on the
right side, were several round flat pieces of white and red metal,
of different bulk; some of the white, which seemed to be silver,
were so large and heavy that my comrade and I could hardly
lift them. In the left pocket were two black pillars irregularly
shaped we could not, without difficulty, reach the top of them
as we stood at the bottom of his pocket. One of them was
covered, and seemed all of a piece; but at the upper end
of the other there appeared a white round substance, about twice
the bigness of our heads. Within each of these was inclosed
a prodigious plate of steel; which, by our orders, we obliged
him to show us, because we apprehended they might be dan-
gerous engines. He took them out of their cases, and told
:
*This inventory is designed to ridicule the reports of the several committees of secresy
appointed by Walpole to investigate the presumed designs of the Jacobites, and especially
the secret negotiations said to be connected with the treaty of Utrecht. It was said of these
reports, that the committees "found nothing suspicious but what they could not understand;"
to which it was added, that "as they understood nothing, they suspected everything."
74
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
us, that in his own country his practice was to shave his beard
with one of these, and cut his meat with the other. There
were two pockets which we could not enter: these he called
his fobs; they were two large slits cut into the top of his middle
Lover, but squeezed close by the pressure of his belly. Out of
the right fob hung a great silver chain, with a wonderful kind
of engine at the bottom. We directed him to draw out what-
ever was at the end of that chain, which appeared to be a globe,
half silver, and half of some transparent metal; for, on the
transparent side, we saw certain strange figures circularly
drawn, and thought we would touch them, till we found our fin-
gers stopped by that lucid substance. He put his engine to
our ears, which made an incessant noise, like that of a water-
mill and we conjecture it is either some unknown animal, or
the god that he worships; but we are more inclined to the latter
opinion, because he assured us (if we understood him right, for
he expressed himself very imperfectly) that he seldom did any-
thing without consulting it. He called it his oracle, and said it
pointed out the time for every action of his life. From the left
ob he took out a net almost large enough for a fisherman, but
contrived to open and shut like a purse, and which served him
for the same use: we found therein several massy pieces of
yellow metal, which, if they be real gold, must be of immense
value.
T
"Having thus, in obedience to your majesty's commands,
diligently searched all his pockets, we observed a girdle about
his waist, made of the hide of some prodigious animal, from
which, on the left side, hung a sword of the length of five men ;
and on the right a bag, or pouch, divided into two cells, each
cell capable of holding three of your majesty's subjects. In
one of these cells were several globes, or balls, of a most pon-
derous metal, about the bigness of our heads, and required a
strong hand to lift them: the other cell contained a heap of
certain black grains, but of no great bulk or weight for we
could hold above fifty of them in the palms of our hands.
"This is an exact inventory of what we found about the
body of the Man-mountain, who used us with great civility, and
due respect to your majesty's commission. Signed and sealed
on the fourth-day of the eighty-ninth moon of your majesty's
auspicious reign:
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
75
***
When the inventory was read over to the emperor, he
directed me, although in very gentle terms, to deliver up the
several particulars. He first called for my cimeter, which I
took out, scabbard and all. In the meantime he ordered three
thousand of his choicest troops (who then attended him) to
surround me at a distance, with their bows and arrows just
ready to discharge; but I did not observe it, for mine eyes
were wholly fixed upon his majesty. He then desired me to
draw my cimeter, which, although it had got some rust by the
sea-water, was in most parts exceeding bright. I did so, and
immediately all the troops gave a shout between terror and
surprise; for the sun shone clear, and the reflection dazzled
their eyes, as I waved the cimeter to and fro in my hand. His
majesty, who is a most magnanimous prince, was less daunted
than I could expect; he ordered me to return it into the scab-
bard, and cast it on the ground as gently as I could, about six
feet from the end of my chain. The next thing he demanded
was one of the hollow iron pillars; by which he meant my
pocket pistols. I drew it out, and at his desire, as well as Í
could, expressed to him the use of it; and charging it only
with powder, which, by the closeness of my pouch happened
to escape wetting in the sea (an inconvenience against which all
prudent mariners take special care to provide), I first cautioned
the emperor not to be afraid, and then I let it off in the air.
The astonishment here was much greater than at the sight of
the cimeter. Hundreds fell down as if they had been struck
dead; and even the emperor, although he stood his ground,
could not recover himself for some time.
* The searches made by the Whigs in the houses of persons suspected of Jacobitism and
Popery, are scarcely caricatured in this whimsical account of the examination of Gulliver's
pockets. Sir Walter Scott has given a similar description in his Peveril of the Peak,
where the emissaries of the House of Commons, puzzled by the ordinary habits of life in
the higher ranks, were disposed to find treason in a laced waistcoat, and Popery in a
hooped petticoat. Writing in Ireland, Swift was likely to find an ample supply of searchers
and alarmists, for the Cromwellian settlers derived their title to their estates from no better
source than the English suspicion and hatred of Popery, were anxious to keep alive such
feelings, and catalogues of suspicious articles, even more ludicrous than those in the text,
may be found in the records of Dublin Castle.
One of the objects of suspicion in those days, wearied out by constant requisitions to
surrender his firearms, and by the repeated annoyances which he had experienced, sent his
poker, tongs, and shovel to the arsenal, and took a regular receipt for them from the officer
in command.
†There is exquisite humor in these formal preparations for security, which escaped the
notice of the persons they were intended to intimidate. The satire is directed against the
precautions taken by the Whig ministers on receiving information of real or pretended
plots of the Jacobites, particularly in May, 1722, when "orders were issued to all military
officers to repair to their respective commands. General Macartney was dispatched to Ire-
land to bring over some troops into the west of England. Messengers were sent to Scot-
land to secure some suspected persons; and the States of Holland were directed to keep
in readiness the guarantee troops to be sent to England in case of need."-Wade, 369. At
the same time a proclamation was issued commanding all papists to depart from
and Westminsterf and for confining papists to their habitations,
London
76'
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
I delivered up both my pistols in the same manner as I had
done my cimeter, and then my pouch of powder and bullets;
begging him that the former might be kept from fire, for it
would kindle with the smallest spark, and blow up his imperial
palace into the air. I likewise delivered up my watch, which
the emperor was very curious to see, and commanded two of his
tallest yeomen of the guards to bear it on a pole upon their
shoulders, as draymen in England do a barrel of ale. He was
amazed at the continual noise it made, and the motion of the
minute-hand, which he could easily discern; for their sight is
much more acute than ours: he asked the opinion of his
learned men about it, which were various and remote, as the
reader may imagine without my repeating; although, indeed, I
could not very perfectly understand them. I then gave up my
silver and copper money, my purse with nine large pieces of
gold, and some smaller ones; my knife and razor, my comb
and silver snuff-box, my handkerchief and journal-book. My
cimeter, pistols, and pouch, were conveyed in carriages to his
majesty's stores; but the rest of my goods were returned me.
I had, as I before observed, one private pocket, which
escaped their search, wherein there was a pair of spectacles
(which I sometimes use for the weakness of mine eyes), a
pocket perspective, and some other little conveniences; which,
being of no consequence to the emperor, I did not think myself
bound in honor to discover, and I apprehended they might be
lost or spoiled if I ventured them out of my possession.
་་
CHAPTER III.
ܢ
THE AUTHOR DIVERTS THE EMPEROR, AND HIS NOBILITY OF
BOTH SEXES, IN A VERY UNCOMMON MANNER THE DIVER-
SIONS OF THE COURT OF LILLIPUT DESCRIBED THE
LUTHOR HAS HIS LIBERTY GRANTED HIM UPON CERTAIN
CONDITIONS.
B
My gentleness and good behavior had gained so far on the
emperor and his court, and indeed upon the army and people
ia general, that I began to conceive hopes of getting my liberty
in a short time. I took all possible methods to cultivate this
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
77
favorable disposition. The natives came by degrees to be less
apprehensive of any danger from me. I would sometimes lie
down, and let five or six of them dance on my hand; and at
last the boys and girls would venture to come and play at hide.
and-seek in my hair. I had now made a good progress in un-
derstanding and speaking the language. The emperor had a
mind one day to entertain me with several of the country shows,
wherein they exceeded all nations I have known, both for dex-
terity and magnificence. I was diverted with none so much
as that of the rope-dancers, performed upon a slender white
thread, extended about two feet, and twelve inches from the
ground. Upon which I shall desire liberty, with the reader's
patience, to enlarge a little.
This diversion is only practised by those persons who are
candidates for great employments and high favor at court.
They are trained in this art from their youth, and are not al-
ways of noble birth, or liberal education. When a great office
is vacant, either by death or disgrace (which often happens), five
or six of those candidates petition the emperor to entertain his
majesty and the court with a dance on the rope; and whoever
jumps the highest without falling, succeeds in the office. Very
often the chief ministers themselves are commanded to show
their skill, and to convince the emperor that they have not lost
their faculty. Flimnap, the treasurer, is allowed to cut a caper
on the straight rope, at least an inch higher than any other
lord in the whole empire. I have seen him do the summerset*
several times together upon a trencher fixed on a rope which
is no thicker than a common packthread in England.† My
* Summerset or summersault a gambol of a tumbler, in which he springs up, turns heels
over head in the air, and comes down upon his feet.-Orig.
Flimnap is intended for Sir Robert Walpole, from whom Swift at first had some expec
tations of promotion: when these were disappointed, the Dean became the bitter enemy of
the minister, and his hatred was aggravated by the zeal with which Walpole persecuted
Swift's great favorites, Lord Bolingbroke and Dr. Atterbury, Bishop of Rochester. In an
epistle to the poet Gay, the Dean gives the following bitter description of Walpole.
.
And first to make my observation right,
I place a statesman full before my sight,
A bloated minister in all his geer,
With shameless visage and perfidious leer;
Two rows of teeth arm each devouring jaw,
And ostrich-like his all-digesting maw.
My fancy drags this monster to my view,
To show the world his chief reverse in
Of loud unmeaning sounds a rapid flood
you.
Rolls from his mouth in plenteous streams of mud ;
With these, the court and senate-house he plies,
Made up of noise, and impudence, and lies.
And again, alluding to Walpole's continuance in office under George II., and Sir Spences
Compton's refusal to form an administration.
I knew a brazen minister of state,
Who bore for twice ten years the public hate
78*
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
friend Reidresal, principal secretary for private affairs, is in
my opinion, if I am not partial, the second after the treasurer;"
the rest of the great officers are much upon a par.
These diversions are often attended with fatal accidents,
whereof great numbers are on record. I myself have seen two
or three candidates break a limb. But the danger is much
greater when the ministers themselves are commanded to show
their dexterity! for, by contending to excel themselves and
their fellows, they strain so far that there is hardly one of them
who has not received a fall, and some of them two or three.
I was assured that, a year or two before my arrival, Flimnap
would infallibly have broke his neck, if one of the king's cush-
ions, that accidentally lay on the ground, had not weakened
the force of his fall."t
There is likewise another diversion, which is only shown
before the emperor and empress, and the first minister, upon
particular occasions. The emperor lays on the table three fing
silken threads of six inches long; one is blue, the other red,
and the third green. These threads are proposed as prizes for
those persons whom the emperor has a mind to distinguish by
a peculiar mark of his favor. The ceremony is performed in
his majesty's great chamber of state, where the candidates are
to undergo a trial of dexterity, very different from the former,
and such as I have not observed the least resemblance of in
any other country of the new or old world. The emperor holds
In every mouth the question most in vogue
Was, "When will they turn out this odious rogue?"
A juncture happen'd, in his highest pride;
While he went robbing on, old master died.
We thought there now remained no room to doubt;
His work is done, the minister must out.
The court invited more than one or two;
Will you, Sir Spencer? or will you? or you?
But not a soul his office durst accept ;
He owed his preservation to his crimes,
The candidates observed his dirty paws,
Nor found it difficult to guess the cause;
But when they smelt such foul corruptions round him
Away they fled, and left him as they found him.
Mr. Secretary Stanhope was most probably intended by Reldresal; he supplanted
Walpole in 1717, and adopted a more temperate and conciliatory course towards the Tories
and Jacobites, with whom Swift was connected.
↑ Walpole was compelled to resign his office in 1717, through the intrigues of Lord Sun-
derland and Mr. Secretary Stanhope, who, following the King to Hanover sought and
found a favorable opportunity of supplanting Walpole and Townshend in the royal favor.
After an exclusion of four years, which seemed politically "to have broken his neck," ha
was restored by his interest with the Duchess of Kendal, the favorite mistress of George I.;
and this was the king's cushion that lay accidentally on the ground and weakened the
force of the fall."
GULLIVER'S TRAVÉLS.
99
a stick in his hands, both ends parallel to the horizon, while
the candidates advancing, one by one, sometimes leap over the
stick sometimes creep under it, backward and forward, several
times, according as the stick is advanced or depressed. Some-
times the emperor holds one end of the stick, and the first
minister the other; sometimes the minister has it entirely to
himself. Whoever performs his part with the most agility, and
holds out the longest in leaping and creeping, is rewarded with
the blue-colored silk; the red is given to the next, and the
green to the third, which they all wear girt twice round about
the middle; and you see few great persons about this court
who are not adorned with one of these girdles.*
The horses of the army, and those of the royal stables,
having been daily led before me, were no longer shy, but would
come up to my very feet without starting. The riders would
leap them over my hand, as I held it on the ground; and one
of the emperor's huntsmen, upon a large courser, took my foot,
shoe and all; which was indeed a prodigious leap. I had the
good fortune to divert the emperor one day after a very ex-
traordinary manner. I desired he would order several sticks
of two feet high, and the thickness of an ordinary cane, to be
brought me; whereupon his majesty commanded the master
of his woods to give directions accordingly; and the next morn-
ing six woodmen arrived with as many carriages, drawn by
eight horses to each. I took nine of these sticks, and fixing
them firmly in the ground in a quadrangular figure, two feet
and a half square, I took four other sticks and tied them par-
allel at each corner, about two feet from the ground; then I
fastened my handkerchief to the nine sticks that stood erect
and extended it on all sides, till it was tight as the top of a
drum; and the four parallel sticks, rising about five inches
higher than the handkerchief, served as ledges on each side.
When I had finished my work, I desired the emperor to let a
troop of the best horse, twenty-four in number, come and exer-
cise upon this plain. His majesty approved of the proposal,
and I took them up one by one, in my hands, ready mounted
and armed, with the proper officers to exercise them. As soon
as they got into order, they divided into two parties, performed
mock skirmishes, discharged blunt arrows, drew their swords,
fled and pursued, attacked and retired, and in short, discovered
• The revival of the Order of the Bath by Sir Robert Walpole, in 1726, as a cheap
means of gratifying his political adherents, was fair game to a satirist like Swift. Walpole
was distinguished not only by the Order of the Bath, but by that of the Garter, which was
conferred on him in 1726.-Coxe's Life of Walpole.
It is scarcely necessary to mention, that blue is the cognizance of the Garter, red of the
Bash, and green of the Thistle.
80
gulliver's traVELS.
the best military discipline I ever beheld. The parallel sticks
secured them and their horses from falling over the stage; and
the emperor was so much delighted, that he ordered this enter-
tainment to be repeated several days, and once was pleased to
be lifted up, and give the word of command; and, with great
difficulty, persuaded even the empress herself to let me hold
her in her close chair within two yards of the stage, when she
was able to take a full view of the whole performance. It was
my good fortune, that no ill accident happened in these enter-
tainments; only once a fiery horse, that belonged to one of the
captains, pawing with his hoof, struck a hole in my handker-
chief, and his foot slipping, he overthrew his rider and himself;
but I immediately relieved them both, and covering the hole
with one hand, I set down the troop with the other, in the same
manner as I took them up. The horse that fell was strained
in the left shoulder, but the rider got no hurt; and I repaired
my handkerchief as well as I could: however, I would not
trust to the strength of it any more, in such dangerous enter-
prises..
About two or three days before I was set at liberty, as I
was entertaining the court with this kind of feats, there arrived
an express to inform his majesty that some of his subjects,
riding near the place where I was first taken up, had seen a
great black substance lying on the ground, very oddly shaped,
extending its edges round, as wide as his majesty's bed-chamber,
and rising up in the middle as high as a man; that it was no
living creature, as they at first apprehended, for it lay on the
grass without motion, and some of them had walked round it
several times; that, by mounting upon each other's shoulders,
they had got to the top, which was flat and even, and stamping
upon it, they found that it was hollow within; that they humbly
conceived it might be something belonging to the man-mountain;
and if his majesty pleased, they would undertake to bring it
with only five horses. I presently knew what they meant, and
was glad at heart to receive this intelligence. It seems, upon
my first reaching the shore after our shipwreck, I was in such
confusion, that before I came to the place where I went to
sleep, my hat, which I had fastened with a string to my head
while I was rowing, and had stuck on all the time I was swim-
ming, fell off after I came to land; the string, as I conjecture,
breaking by some accident, which I had never observed, but
thought my hat had been lost at sea. I entreated his imperial
najesty to give orders it might be brought to me as soon as
possible, describing to him the use and the nature of it; and
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
Er
the next day the wagoners arrived with it, but not in a very
good condition, they had bored two holes in the brim, within
an inch and a half of the edge, and fastened two hooks in the
holes, these hooks were tied by a long cord to the harness, and
thus my hat was dragged along for above half an English mile ;
but the ground in that country being extremely smooth and
level, it received less damage than I expected:
Two days after this adventure, the emperor, having ordered
that part of his army which quarters in and about his metro-
polis, to be in readiness, took a fancy of diverting himself in
a singular manner. He desired that I would stand like a col-
ossus, with my legs as far asunder as I conveniently could.
He then commanded his general (who was an old experienced
leader, and a great patron of mine) to draw up the troops in
close order, and march them under me; the foot by twenty-
four abreast, and the horse by sixteen, with drums beating,
colors flying, and pikes advanced. This body consisted of
three thousand foot, and a thousand horse. His majesty gave
orders, upon pain of death, that every soldier in his march
should observe the strictest decency with regard to my person;
which, however, could not prevent some of the younger officers
from turning up their eyes, as they passed under me; and to
confess the truth, my breeches were at that time in so ill a con-
dition, that they afforded some opportunities for laughter and
admiration.*
I had sent so many memorials and petitions for my liberty
that his majesty at length mentioned the matter, first in the
cabinet, and then in a full council; where it was opposed by
none, except Skyresh Bolgolam, who was pleased, without any
provocation, to be my mortal enemy.† But it was carried
against him by the whole board, and confirmed by the emperor.
The author probably intends to ridicule the partiality of George I. for reviews
and military pageantry. Hogarth's celebrated picture of the "March of the Guards
to Finchley" belongs to a much later period, but its satiric touches would probably
have been as applicable in the reign of the first as of the second George.
+ Skyresh Bolgolam is most probably the Duke of Argyle, who was greatly in
censed at Swift's attacks on the Scottish nation, in his "Public Spirit of the Whigs."
In an unfinished poem on himself, the Dean alludes to the proclamation offering
three hundred pounds for the discovery of the author of this pamphlet, which was
issued at the demand rather than the request of the Duke of Argyle; he conducted
all the Scotch lords in a body to demand an audience of the Queen, and seek rap-
aration.
The Queen incensed, his services forgoi,
Leaves him a victim to the vengeful Scot;
Now through the realm a proclamation spread,
To fix a price on his devoted head,
While, innocent, he scorns ignoble flight;
His watchful friends preserve him by a sleight.
See also the character given of Argyle in Swift's notes on Macky-Appendix to Lätis.
pilt, ka
82
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
That minister was galbet, or admiral of the realm, very much in
his master's confidence, and a person well versed in affairs, but
of a morose and sour complexion. However, he was at length
persuaded to comply, but prevailed that the articles and condi-
tions upon which I should be set free, and to which I must
swear, should be drawn up by himself. These articles were
brought to me by Skyresh Bolgolam in person, attended by two
under-secretaries and several persons of distinction. After they
were read, I was demanded to swear to the performance of them,
first, in the manner of my own country, and afterwards in the
method prescribed by their laws, which was, to hold my right
foot in my left hand, and to place the middle finger of my right
hand on the crown of my head, and my thumb on the tip of my
right ear. But because the reader may be curious to have some
idea of the style and manner of expression peculiar to that
people, as well as to know the articles upon which I recovered
my liberty, I have made a translation of the whole instrument,
word for word, as near as I was able, which I here offer to the
public.*
GOLBASTO MOMAREM EVLAME GURDILO SHEFIN MULLY
ULLY GUE, most mighty emperor of Lilliput, delight and terror
of the universe, whose dominions extend five thousand blustrugs
(about twelve miles in circumference) to the extremities of the
globe; monarch of all monarchs, taller than the sons of men ;
whose feet press down to the centre, and whose head strikes
against the sun; at whose nod the princes of the earth shake
their knees; pleasant as the spring, comfortable as the sum-
mer, fruitful as autumn, dreadful as winter. His most sublime
Majesty proposes to the Man-mountain, lately arrived at our
celestial dominions, the following articles, which, by a solemn
oath, he shall be obliged to perform :
I. The Man-mountain shall not depart from our dominions
without our license under our great seal.
II. He shall not presume to come into our metropolis with
out our express order; at which time, the inhabitants shall
have two hours' warning to keep within doors.
III. The said Man-mountain shall confine his walks to our
* In his description of Lilliput, in the following articles, Gulliver seems to have had
England more immediately in view. In his description of Blefuscu, he seems to intend
the people and kingdom of Francer-Orrery.
It is perhaps in order to qualify this paralle' that Swift has changed the relative descrip.
tion of the two countries, and made Lilliput the continent, Blefuscu the island.-Sir Walter
Faeth
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
83
&
principal highroads, and not offer to walk or lie down in a
neadow or field of corn.
IV. As he walks the said roads, he shall take the utmost
care not to trample upon the bodies of any of our loving sub-
jects, their horses or carriages, nor take any of our subjects into
his hands without their own consent.
V. If an express requires extraordinary dispatch, the Man
mountain shall be obliged to carry, in his pocket, the messen
ger and horse a six days' journey once in every moon, and
return the said messenger back (if so required) safe to our im
perial presence.
VI. He shall be our ally against our enemies in the island
of Blefuscu, and do his utmost to destroy their fleet, which is
now preparing to invade us.
→
VII. That the said Man-mountain shall, at his time of lei-
sure, be aiding and assisting to our workmen, in helping to
raise certain great stones, towards covering the wall of the
principal park, and other our royal buildings.
VIII. That the said Man-mountain shall in two moons' tîme,
deliver in an exact survey of the circumference of our domin-
ions, by a computation of his own paces round the coast.
Lastly, That, upon his solemn oath to observe the above
articles, the said Man-mountain shall have a daily allowance of
meat and drink sufficient for the support of 1724 of our sub-
jects, with free access to our royal person, and other marks of
our favor. Given at our palace at Belfaborac, the twelfth day
of the ninety-first moon of our reign.
I swore and subscribed to these articles with great cheerful-
ness and content, although some of them were not so honorable
as I could have wished; which proceeded wholly from the
malice of Skyresh Bolgolam, the high-admiral; whereupon my
chains were immediately unlocked, and I was at full liberty.
The emperor himself, in person, did me the honor to be by at
the whole ceremony. I made my acknowledgments by pros-
trating myself at his majesty's feet; but he commanded me to
rise; and after many gracious expressions, which to avoid the
Fensure of vanity I shall not repeat, he added, "that he hoped
84
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
I should prove a useful servant, and well deserve all the favors
he had already conferred upon me, or might do for the future."
The reader may please to observe, that in the last article of
the recovery of my liberty, the emperor stipulates to allow me a
quantity of meat and drink sufficient for the support of 1724
Lilliputians. Some time after, asking a friend at court how they
came to fix on that determined number, he told me that his
majesty's mathematicians, having taken the height of my body
by the help of a quadrant, and finding it to exceed theirs in the
proportion of twelve to one, they concluded from the similarity
of their bodies, that mine must contain at least 1724 of theirs,
and consequently would require as much food as was necessary
to support that number of Lilliputians. By which the reader
may conceive an idea of the ingenuity of that people, as well
as the prudent and exact economy of so great a prince.
CHAPTER IV.
MILDENDO, THE METROPOLIS OF LILLIPUT, DESCRIBED, TOGETHER
WITH THE EMPEROR'S PALACE—A CONVERSATION BETWEEN
THE AUTHOR AND A PRINCIPAL SECRETARY, CONCERNING THE
AFFAIRS OF THAT EMPIRE-THE AUTHOR OFFERS TO SERVE
THE EMPEROR IN HIS WARS.
LIBERTY having been granted me, my first request was for
permission to see Mildendo, the metropolis; which the emperor
readily allowed me, but with a special charge to do no hurt
either to the inhabitants or their houses. The people had
notice, by proclamation, of my design to visit the town. The
wall, which compassed it, is two feet and a half high, and at
least eleven inches broad, so that a coach and horses may be
driven very safely round it; and it is flanked with strong towers
at ten feet distance. I stepped over the great western gate,
and passed very gently and sidelong through the two principal
streets only in my short waistcoat, for fear of damaging the
roofs and eaves of the houses with the skirts of my coat. I
walked with the utmost circumspection, to avoid treading on
any stragglers who might remain in the streets; although the
orders were very strict, that all people should keep, in their
G JLLIVER'S TRAVELS.
85
houses at their own peril. The garret windows and tops of
houses were so crowded with spectators, that I thought in all
my travels I had not seen a more populous place. The city is
an exact square, each side of the wall being five hundred feet
long. The two great streets, which run across and divide it
into four quarters, are five feet wide. The lanes and alleys,
which I could not enter, but only viewed them as I passed, are
from twelve to eighteen inches. The town is capable of hold-
ing five hundred thousand souls: the houses are from three to
five stories: the shops and markets well provided.
The emperor's palace is in the centre of the city, where the
two great streets meet. It is enclosed by a wall of two feet
high, and twenty feet distance form the buildings. I had his
majesty's permission to step over this wall; and the space
being so wide between that and the palace, I could easily view
it on every side. The outward court is a square of forty feet,
and includes two other courts: in the inmost are the royal
apartments, which I was very desirous to see, but found it ex-
tremely difficult; for the great gates, from one square into an-
other, were but eighteen inches wide. Now the buildings of
the outer court were at least five feet high, and it was impossi-
ble for me to stride over them without infinite damage to the
pile, though the walls were strongly built of hewn stone, and
four inches thick. At the same time the emperor had a great'
desire that I should see the magnificence of his palace; but
this I was not able to do till three days after, which I spent in
cutting down with my knife some of the largest trees in the
royal park, about a hundred yards distance from the city. Of
these trees I made two stools, each about three feet high, and
strong enough to bear my weight. The people having received
notice a second time, I went again through the city to the pal-
ace with my two stools in my hands. When I came to the side'
of the outer court, I stood upon one stool and took the other
in my hand; this I lifted over the roof, and gently set it down
on the space between the first and second court, which was
eight feet wide. I then stepped over the building very con-
veniently from one stool to the other, and drew up the first
after me with a hooked stick. By this contrivance I got into
the inmost court; and, lying down upon my side, I applied my
face to the windows of the middle stories, which were left open
on purpose, and discovered the most splendid apartments that
can be imagined.
¿
There I saw the empress and the young princess, in their
several lodgings, with their chief attendants about them. Her
86
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
imperial majesty was pleased to smile very graciously upon me.
and gave me out of the window her hand to kiss.*
But I shall not anticipate the reader with further descrip
tions of this kind, because I reserve them for a greater work,
which is now almost ready for the press; containing a general
description of this empire, from its first erection, through a long
series of princes; with a particular account of their wars and
politics, laws, learning and religion; their plants and animals;
their peculiar manners and customs, with other matters very
curious and useful; my chief design at present being only to
relate such events and transactions as happened to the public
or to myself during a residence of about nine months in that
empire.
One morning, about a fortnight after I had obtained my
liberty, Reldresal, principal secretary (as they style him) for
private affairs, came to my house attended only by one servant.
He ordered his coach to wait at a distance, and desired I would
give him an hour's audience; which I readily consented to, on
account of his quality and personal merits, as well as of the
many good offices he had done me during my solicitations at
court. I offered to lie down that he might the more conveni-
ently reach my ear; but he chose rather to let me hold him in
my hand during our conversation. He began with compliments
on my liberty; said "he might pretend to some merit in it;
but however added, "that if it had not been for the present sit-
uation of things at court, perhaps I might not have obtained it
so soon. For," said he, as flourishing a condition as we may
appear to be in to foreigners, we labor under two mighty evils;
a violent faction at home, and the danger of an invasion, by a
most potent enemy, from abroad. As to the first, you are to
understand, that for above seventy moons past there have
been two struggling parties in this empire, under the names of
Tramecksan and Slamecksan,† from the high and low heels of
their shoes, by which they distinguish themselves. It is al-
leged, indeed, that the high-heels are most agreeable to our
ancient constitution; but, however this be, his majesty has de-
termined to make use only of low heels in the administration
of the government, and all offices in the gift of the crown, as
you cannot but observe: and particularly that his majesty's im-
66
*The character of the empress is manifestly taken from that of Queen Anne-good-
natured, but easily duped.
↑ High-church and Low-church, or Whig and Tory. As every accidental difference
between man and man in person and circumstances is by this work rendered extremely con
temptible; so speculative differences are shown to be equally ridiculous, when the zeal
with which they are opposed and defended too much exceeds their importance.~Hawke
worth.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS:
87
'perial heels are lower at least by a drurr than any of his court
(drurr is a measure about the fourteenth part of an inch). The
animosities between these two parties run so high, that they
will neither eat nor drink nor talk with each other.
We com-
pute the Tramecksan, or high heels, to exceed us in number;
but the power is wholly on our side. We apprehend his im-
perial highness, the heir to the crown, to have some tendency
towards the high heels; at least, we can plainly discover that
one of his heels is higher than the other, which gives him a
hobble in his gait.* * Now, in the midst of these intestine dis-
quiets, we are threatened with an invasion from the island of
Blefuscu, which is the other great empire of the universe, al-
most as large and powerful as this of his majesty. For as to
what we have heard you affirm, that there are other kingdoms
and states in the world inhabited by human creatures as large
as yourself, our philosophers are in much doubt, and would
rather conjecture that you dropped from the moon, or one of
the stars; because it is certain that a hundred mortals of your
bulk would in a short time destroy all the fruits and cattle of
his majesty's dominions: besides, our histories of six thousand
moons make no mention of any other regions than the two great
empires of Lilliput and Blefuscu. Which two mighty powers
have, as I was going to tell you, been engaged in a most obsti-
nate war for six-and-thirty moons past. It began upon the fol-
lowing occasion: it is allowed on all hands, that the primitive
way of breaking eggs, before we eat them, was upon the larger
end; but his present majesty's grandfather, while he was a
boy, going to eat an egg, and breaking it according to the an-
cient practice, happened to cut one of his fingers; whereupon
the emperor, his father, published an edict, commanding all his
subjects, upon great penalties, to break the smaller end of the
eggs.† The people so highly resented this law, that our his-
tories tell us, there have been six rebellions raised on that ac-
count; wherein one emperor lost his life, and another his
crown.§ These civil commotions were constantly fomented by
George, Prince of Wales, afterwards George II., was at this time vehement in his
hostility to his father's ministers; like all heirs-apparent since the accession of the house of
Brunswick, he chose his political friends among the parties most opposed to the court, call-
ing around him both the discontented Whigs and the displaced Tories. We learn from a
letter of Mrs. Howard, that the Prince was greatly amused at this description of his hob-
bling between the two political parties. On his accession to the throne, which took place
shortly after the publication of Gulliver, he was easily induced by Queen Caroline to con-
tinue Sir Robert Walpole at the head of affairs; an unexpected change, which greatly
disappointed Swift and his friends.
The controversy respecting the sacraments between the Romish and Anglican churches
is humorously portrayed in the dispute about the proper end of breaking the egg. The
emperor who cut his fingers is manifestly Henry VIII., who was so sadly perplexed by the
sacrament of marriage and the difficulty of divorce.
t Charles I.
§ James II.
88
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
the monarchs of Blefuscu; and when they were quelled, the
exiles always fled for refuge to that empire. It is computed
that eleven thousand persons have at several times suffered
death, rather than submit to break their eggs at the smaller
end. Many hundred large volumes have been published upon
this controversy: but the books of the Big-endians have been
long forbidden, and the whole party rendered incapable by law
of holding employments. During the course of these troubles,
the emperors of Blefuscu did frequently expostulate by their
ambassadors, accusing ús of making a schism in religion by of-
fending against a fundamental doctrine of our great prophet
Lustrog, in the fifty-fourth chapter of the Blundecral, which is
their Alcoran. This, however, is thought to be a mere strain
upon the text; for the words are these: that all true believers
break their eggs at the convenient end; and which is the con-
venient end seems, in my humble opinion, to be left to every
man's conscience, or at least in the power of the chief magis-
trate to determine.*
"Now, the Big-endian exiles have found so much credit in the
emperor of Blefuscu's court, and so much private assistance and
encouragement from their party here at home, that a bloody
war has been carried on between the two empires for six-and-
thirty moons, with various success; during which time we have
lost forty capital ships, and a much greater number of smaller
vessels, together with thirty thousand of our best seamen and
soldiers; and the damage received by the enemy is reckoned
to be somewhat greater than ours.† However, they have now
equipped a numerous fleet, and are just preparing to make a
descent upon us; and his imperial majesty, placing great con-
fidence in your valor and strength, has commanded me to lay
this account of his affairs before you."
I desired the secretary to present my humble duty to the
emperor; and to let him know, "that I thought it would not
Swift appears to intimate that the great point at issue between the Romish and English
churches, the sacrament of the Eucharist, has been decided too positively by the theolo-
gians on both sides; he intimates that the question of transubstantiation should be left open
to the faith of the receiver, in accordance with the memorable lines of Queen Elizabeth.
Christ was the word that spake it,
He took the bread, and brake it;
And what that word did make it,
That I believe and take it.
This description of the Big-endian war is designed for the wars of the revolution
which were terminated by the peace of Utrecht, and the enumeration of the losses and
slaughter occasioned by the war is intended to vindicate Harley and Bolingbroke for bring.
ing it to a conclusion.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
89
become me, who was a foreigner, to interfere with parties; but
I was ready, with the hazard of my life, to defend his person
and state against all invaders.'
"
CHAPTER V.
THE AUTHOR, BY AN EXTRAORDINARY STRATAGEM, PREVENTS AN
INVASION-A HIGH TITLE OF HONOR IS CONFERRED UPON
HIM AMBASSADORS ARRIVE FROM THE EMPEROR OF BLE-
FUSCU, AND SUE FOR PEACE-THE EMPRESS'S APARTMENTS
ON FIRE BY ACCIDENT; THE AUTHOR INSTRUMENTAL IN
SAVING THE REST OF THE PALACE.
LILLIPUT is part of the continent, but the empire of Blefuscu
is an island situated to the north-east of the mainland, from
which it is parted only by a channel of eight hundred yards
wide. I had not yet seen it, and upon this notice of an intended
invasion, I avoided appearing on that side of the coast, for
fear of being discovered by some of the enemy's ships, who had
received no intelligence of me; all intercourse between the two
empires having been strictly forbidden during the war, upon
pain of death, and an embargo laid by our emperor upon all
vessels whatsoever. I communicated to his majesty a project
I had formed of seizing the enemy's whole fleet; which, as our
scouts assured us, lay at anchor in the harbor, ready to sail
with the first fair wind. I consulted the most experienced
seamen upon the depth of the channel, which they had often
plumbed; who told me, that in the middle, at high water, it
was seventy glumgluffs deep, which is about six feet of Euro-
pean measure; and the rest of it fifty glumgluffs at most. I
walked towards the north-east coast, over against Blefuscu ;
where, lying down behind a hillock, I took out my small per-
spective glass, and viewed the enemy's fleet at anchor, consist
ing of about fifty men-of-war, and a great number of transports;
I then came back to my house, and gave orders (for which I
had a warrant) for a great quantity of the strongest cable and
bars of iron. The cable was about as thick as packthread,
and the bars of the length and size of a knitting-needle. I
• Gulliver, without examining the subject of dispute, readily engaged to defend the
emperor against invasion, because he knew that no such monarch had a right to invade the
Cominions of another, for the propagation of truth.-Hawksworth.
90
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
trebled the cable to make it stronger, and for the same reason,
I twisted three of the iron bars together, bending the extremi
ties into a hook. Having thus fixed fifty hooks to as many
cables, I went back to the north east coast, and putting off my
coat, shoes, and stockings, walked into the sea in my leathern
jerkin, about half an hour before high water. I waḍed with
what haste I could, and swam in the middle about thirty yards,
till I felt ground. I arrived at the fleet in less than half an
hour. The enemy were so frighted when they saw me, that
they leaped out of their ships, and swam to shore, where there
could not be fewer than thirty thousand souls: I then took my
tackling, and fastening a hook to the hole at the prow of each,
I tied all the cords at the end. While I was thus employed,
the enemy discharged several thousand arrows, many of which
stuck in my hands and face; and besides the excessive smart,
gave me much disturbance in my work. My greatest appre-
hension was for mine eyes, which I should have infallibly lost,
if I had not suddenly thought of an expedient. I kept, among
other little necessaries, a pair of spectacles in a private pocket,
which, as I observed before, had escaped the emperor's searches
These I took out and fastened as strongly as I could upon my
nose, and thus armed, went on boldly with my work, in spite of
the enemy's arrows, many of which struck against the glasses
of my spectacles, but without any other effect, farther than a
little to discompose them. I had now fastened all the hooks,
and taking the knot in my hand, began to pull; but not a ship
would stir, for they were all too fast held by their anchors, so
that the boldest part of my enterprise remained. I therefore
let go the cord, and leaving the hooks fixed to the ships, I re-
solutely cut with my knife the cables that fastened the anchors,
receiving about two hundred arrows in my face and hands
then I took up the knotted end of the cables, to which my
hooks were tied, and with great ease drew fifty of the enemy's
largest men-of-war after me.
The Blefuscudians, who had not the least imagination of
what I intended, were at first confounded with astonishment.
They had seen me cut the cables, and thought my design was
only to let the ships run adrift, or fall foul on each other; but
when they perceived the whole fleet moving in order, and saw
me pulling at the end, they set up such a scream of grief and
despair as is almost impossible to describe or conceive.* When
* The capture of the Blefuscudian fleet is intended to represent the efforts made by the
Tory ministry to secure the naval supremacy of England in the negotiations at Utrecht, and
particularly their success in procuring the demolition of Dunkirk, and the cession of several
French colonies.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
9i
I had got out of danger, I stopped awhile to pick out the arrows
that stuck in my hands and face; and rubbed on some of the
same ointment that was given me at my first arrival, as I have
formerly mentioned. I then took off my spectacles, and wait-
ing about an hour till the tide was a little fallen, I waded
through the middle with my cargo, and arrived safe at the
royal port of Lilliput.
The Emperor and his whole court stood on the shore, ex-
pecting the issue of this great adventure. They saw the ships
move forward in a large half-moon, but could not discern me,
who was up to my breast in water. When I advanced to the
middle of the channel, they were yet more in pain, because I
was under water to my neck. The emperor concluded me to
be drowned, and that the enemy's fleet was approaching in a
hostile manner: but he was soon eased of his fears; for the
channel growing shallower every step I made, I came in a
short time within hearing, and holding up the end of the cable,
by which the fleet was fastened, I cried in a loud voice, "Long
live the most puissant king of Lilliput!" This great prince
received me at my landing with all possible encomiums, and
·
· created me a nardac upon the spot, which is the highest title of
honor among them.*
His majesty desired I would take some other opportunity
of bringing all the rest of his enemy's ships into his ports. And
so unmeasurable is the ambition of princes, that he seemed to
The treaty at Utrecht was at first very popular with the English people; and it was re-
garded by Queen Anne as a blessing to England and to Europe. The promised demolition
of Dunkirk, and its surrender as a guarantee to General Hill were regarded not only by the
court, but by the nation, as an advantage scarcely inferior to what the capture of the Blefus
rudian fleet would have been to the emperor of Lilliput. Swift wrote a song on the event,
which was very popular. The following are the concluding stanzas :
Our merchant ships may cut the line,
And not be snapped by privateers;
And commoners who love good wine,
Will drink it now as well as peers:
Landed men shall have their rent,
Yet our stocks rise cent. per cent. ;
The Dutch from hence shall no more millions drain ¡
We'll bring on us no more debts,
Nor with bankrupts fill gazettes ;
And the Queen shall enjoy her own again.
The towns we took ne'er did us good:
What signified the French to beat?
We spent our money and our blood
To make the Dutchmen proud and greats
But the lord of Oxford swears
Dunkirk never shall be theirs
The Dutch-hearted Whigs may rail and complain ;
But true Englishmen may fill
A health to General Hill,
For the Queen now enjoys her own again,
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་
think of nothing less than reducing the whole empire of Ble
fuscu into a province, and governing it by a viceroy; of destroy-
ing the Big-endian exiles, and compelling that people to break
the smaller end of their eggs, by which he would remain the
sole monarch of the whole world. But I endeavored to divert
him from this design, by many arguments drawn from the top-
ics of policy as well as justice; and I plainly protested, “that I
would never be an instrument of bringing a free and brave
people into slavery;" and when the matter was, debated in
council, the wisest part of the ministry was of my opinion.
This open, bold declaration of mine was so opposite to the
schemes and politics of his imperial majesty, that he could
never forgive me. He mentioned it in a very artful manner at
council, where I was told that some of the wisest appeared at
least, by their silence, to be of my opinion; but others, who
were my secret enemies, could not forbear some expressions.
which by a side wind reflected on me ; and from this time began
an intrigue between his majesty, and a junto of ministers,
maliciously bent against me, which broke out in less than two
months, and had like to have ended in my utter destruction.
Of so little weight are the greatest services to princes, when put
into the balance with a refusal to gratify their passions.
About three weeks after this exploit there arrived a solemn
embassy from Blefuscu, with humble offers of a peace; which
was soon concluded, upon conditions very advantageous to our
emperor, wherewith I shall not trouble the reader. There were
six ambassadors with a train of about five hundred persons;
and their entry was very magnificent, suitable to the grandeur
of their master and the importance of their business. When
their treaty was finished, wherein I did them several good offices
by the credit I now had, or at least appeared to have, at court,
their excellencies, who were privately told how much I had been
their friend, made me a visit in form. They began with many
compliments upon my valor and generosity, invited me to that
kingdom in the emperor their master's name, and desired, me
to show them some proofs of my prodigious strength, of which
they had heard so many wonders; wherein I readily obliged
them, but shall not trouble the reader with the particulars.
The conquest of France w seriously believed feasible by many friends of the Duke
of Marlborough: but when the sit of such a petty fortress as Bouchain occupied the
greater part of one campaign, the best English statesmen saw there was little chance of such
a consummation. Mesnager, if the metnoirs published in his name be not a forgery, declares
that the Tories used to annoy the Whigs by asking, "How long will it take to conquer
France at the rate of a Bouchain per summer?" In the debates on the treaty of Utre
(A. D. 1713), the advocates for eace had decidedly the best of the argument, so
Gulliver is justified in saying that the wisest were of his opinion."
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
93
When I had for some time entertained their excellencies, to
their infinite satisfaction and surprise, I desired they would do
me the honor to present my most humble respects to the
emperor their master, the renown of whose virtues had so justly
filled the whole world with admiration, and whose royal person
I resolved to attend before I returned to my own country.
Accordingly, the next time I had the honor to see our emperor,
I desired his general license to wait on the Blefuscudian mon
arch, which he was pleased to grant me, as I could perceive, in
a very cold manner
cold manner; but could not guess the reason, till I had
a whisper from a certain person, "that Flimnap and Bolgolam
had represented my intercourse with those ambassadors as a
mark of disaffection;" from which I am sure my heart was
wholly free. And this was the first time I began to conceive
some imperfect idea of courts and ministers. *
It is to be observed, that these ambassadors spoke to me
by an interpreter, the languages of both empires differing as
much from each other as any two in Europe, and each nation
priding itself upon the antiquity, beauty, and energy of their
own tongue, with an avowed contempt for that of their neighbor:
yet our emperor, standing upon the advantage he had got by
the seizure of their fleet, obliged them to deliver their creden-
tials, and make their speech, in the Lilliputian tongue. And it
must be confessed, that from the great intercourse of trade and
commerce between both realms, from the continual reception
of exiles which is mutual among them, and from the custom, in
each empire, to send their young nobility and richer gentry to
the other, in order to polish themselves by seeing the world,
and understanding men and manners; there are few
persons of
distinction, or merchants, or seamen, who dwell in the maritime
parts, but what can hold conversation in both tongues; as 1
found some weeks after, when I went to pay my respects to the
emperor of Blefuscu, which, in the midst of great misfortunes,
through the malice of my enemies, proved a very happy adven
ture to me, as I shall relate in its proper place.
The reader may remember, that when I signed those arti-
cles upon which I recovered my liberty, they were some which
I disliked, upon account of their being too servile; neither
could anything but an extreme necessity have forced me to sub-
A
The charge raised against Gulliver for his innocent intercourse with the ambassadors
from Blefuscu alludes to the chief accusation brought against Bolingbroke (A.D. 1715),
which was his treasonable intimacy with the French ministers during the negotiations of the
peace at Utrecht. Bolingbroke's journey to France to negotiate a separate peace, and his
clandestine intercourse with the agents of Louis, were, however, of such a suspicious nature,
that he did not think it prudent to wait for his trial.
KAT NI MTANDANGANANGANANTA DELLA MANZAMBALE
VERTON **
S
2
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GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
mit. But being now a nardac of the highest rank in that em-
pire, such offices were looked upon as below my dignity, and
the emperor (to do him justice) never once mentioned them to
me. However, it was not long before I had an opportunity of
doing his majesty, at least as I then thought, a most signal
service. I was alarmed at midnight with the cries of many
hundred people at my door; by which, being suddenly awaked,
I was in some kind of terror. I heard the word burglum re-
peated incessantly: several of the emperor's court, making
their way through the crowd, entreated me to come immediately
to the palace, where her imperial majesty's apartment was on
fire, by the carelessness of a maid of honor, who fell asleep
while she was reading a romance. I got up in an instant ; and
orders being given to clear the way before me, and it being
likewise a moonshine night, I made a shift to get to the palace
without trampling on any of the people. I found they had
already applied ladders to the walls of the apartment, and were
well provided with buckets, but the water was at some distance.
These buckets were about the size of a large thimble, and the
poor people supplied me with them as fast as they could; but
the flame was so violent that they did little good. I might
easily have stifled it with my coat, which I unfortunately left
behind me for haste, and came away only in my leathern jerkin.
The case seemed wholly desperate and deplorable; and this
magnificent palace would have infallibly been burnt down to
the ground, if, by a presence of mind unusual to me, I had not
suddenly thought of an expedient. I had the evening before
drunk plentifully of a most delicious wine called glimigrim (the
Blefuscudians call it flunec), but ours is esteemed the better
sort, which is very diuretic. By the luckiest chance in the
world, I had not discharged myself of any part of it. The
heat I had contracted by coming very near the flames, by labor-
ing to quench them, made the wine begin to operate by urine,
which I voided in such a quantity, and applied so well to the
proper places, that in three minutes the fire was wholly extin-
guished, and the rest of that noble pile, which had cost so
many agés in erecting, preserved from destruction.
It was now daylight, and I returned to my house without
waiting to congratulate with the emperor; because, although I
had done a very eminent piece of service, yet I could not tell
how his majesty might resent the manner by which I had per-
formed it for, by the fundamental laws of the realm, it is capi-
tal in any person, of what quality soever, to make water within
the precincts of the palace. But I was a little comforted by
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
95
a message from his majesty, "that he would give orders to the
grand justiciary for passing my pardon in form;" which, how-
ever, I could not obtain; and I was privately assured, that the
empress, conceiving the greatest abhorrence of what I had done,
removed to the most distant side of the court, firmly resolved
that those buildings should never be repaired for her use; and,
in the presence of her chief confidants, could not forbear vow-
ing revenge.
*
CHAPTER VI.
OF THE INHABITANTS OF LILLIPUT; THEIR LEARNING, LAWS,
AND CUSTOMS; THE MANNER OF EDUCATING THEIR CHIL-
DREN—THE AUTHOR'S WAY OF LIVING IN THAT COUNTRY
HIS VINDICATION OF A GREAT LADY.
QUARRELS and intrigues are so common in courts, that I
need not dwell on the calumnies devised by the envious to
prejudice the mind of the empress still further against me, and
I shall therefore turn to a different subject. Although I intend
to leave the description of this empire to a particular treatise,
yet, in the mean time, I am content to gratify the curious reader
*Swift, in this description of the empress's hostility on account of his indecency, and
her forgetfulness of the essential service which he had rendered, alludes to the prejudices of
Queen Anne, who was more indignant at the immorality of his writings than grateful for
his support of her favorite ministry. The Queen had actually nominated Swift to an Eng
lish bishopric, when Dr. Sharp, Archbishop of York, went to the Queen, showed her the
"Tale of a Tub." and declared that the author of such a work could not be made a prelate
without bringing disgrace on the church. Hence Swift, in the lines on himself, complains
that he is
And again,
By an old pursued,
A crazy prelate and a royal prude,
York is from Lambeth sent to show the Queen,
A dangerous treatise writ against the spleen,
Which, by the style, the matter, and the drift,
'Tis thought could be the work of none but Swift.
The Archbishop was eagerly seconded by the Duchess of Somerset, whom Swift ħad
bitterly lampooned. The Queen could never afterwards be persuaded to revoke her deter
mination, and Swift thenceforth always spoke of her in terms of contempt.
1 In a German critique on Gulliver's Travels, this chapter has been rather severely cen-
sured, because the author has neglected to give any particulars of the Lilliputian climate
and its effects; a source from which the renewer avers, that many circumstances might have
been deduced which would give an additional plausibility to the narrative. It must ba ob-
served, however, in Swift's justification, that this neglect of observing climate and its pecu
liarities is common to all the early narratives of voyagers, and also that for the purposes of
tis satire it was necessary to identify the Lilliputian climate with that of England.
96
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
with some general ideas. As the common size of the natives
is somewhat under six inches high, so there is an exact propor-
tion in all other animals, as well as plants and trees: for in-
stance, the tallest horses and oxen are between four and five
inches in height, the sheep an inch and a half, more or less;
their geese about the bigness of a sparrow, and so the several
gradations downwards, till you come to the smallest, which to
my sight were almost invisible; but nature has adapted the
eyes of the Lilliputians to all objects proper for their view;
they see with great exactness, but at no great distance. And
to show the sharpness of their sight towards objects that are
near, I have been much pleased with a cook pulling a lark, which
was not so large as a common fly; and a young girl threading
an invisible needle with invisible silk.
Their tallest trees are about seven feet high: I mean some of
those in the great royal park, the tops whereof I could but just
reach with my fist clenched. The other vegetables are in the
same proportion; but this I leave to the reader's imagination.
I shall say but little at present of their learning, which for
many ages has flourished in all its branches among them; but
their manner of writing is very peculiar, being neither from the
left to the right, like the Europeans; nor from the right to the
left, like the Arabians; nor from up to down, like the Chinese;
but aslant, from one corner of the paper to the other, like ladies
in England.
They bury their dead with their heads directly downward,
because they hold an opinion that in eleven thousand moons
they are all to rise again; in which period the earth (which they
conceive to be flat) will turn upside down, and by this means
they shall, at their resurrection, be found ready standing on their
feet. The learned among them confess the absurdity of this
doctrine; but the practice still continues, in compliance to the
vulgar.
There are some laws and customs in this empire very pecu-
liar; and if they were not so directly contrary to those of my
own dear country, I should be tempted to say a little in their
justification. It is only to be wished they were as well execu-
ted. The first I shall mention, relates to informers. All
crimes against the state are punished here with the utmost se-
verity; but if the person accused makes his innocence plainly
to appear upon his trial, the accuser is immediately put to an
ignominious death; and out of his goods or lands the innocent
person is quadruply recompensed for the loss of his time, for
the danger he underwent, for the hardship of his imprisonment,
į
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
97
and for all the charges he has been at in making his defence;
or, if that fund be deficient, it is largely supplied by the crown.
The emperor also confers on him some public mark of his
favor, and proclamation is made of his innocence through the
whole city.
They look upon fraud as a greater crime than theft, and
therefore seldom fail to punish it with death; for they allege,
that care and vigilance, with a very common understanding,
may preserve a man's goods from thieves, but honesty has no
fence against superior cunning; and since it is necessary that
there should be a perpetual intercourse of buying and selling,
and dealing upon credit, where fraud is permitted and connived
at, or has no law to punish it, the honest dealer is always un
done, and the knave gets the advantage. I remember, when I
was once interceding with the king for a criminal who had
wronged his master of a great sum of money, which he had re-
ceived by order, and ran away with; and happening to tell his
majesty by way of extenuation, that it was only a breach of
trust, the emperor thought it monstrous in me to offer as a de-
fence the greatest aggravation of the crime; and truly I had
little to say in return, farther than the common answer, that
different nations had different customs; for, I confess I was
heartily ashamed.*
Although we call rewards and punishments the two hinges
upon which all government turns, yet I could never observe this
maxim to be put in practice by any nation, except that of Lilli-
put. Whoever can there bring sufficient proof that he has strictly
observed the laws of his country for seventy-three moons, has a
claim to certain privileges, according to his quality and condi-
tion of life, with a proportionable sum of money out of a fund
appropriated for that use: he likewise acquires the title of snil-
pall, or legal, which is added to his name, but does not descend
to his posterity. And these people thought it a prodigious de-
fect of policy among us, when I told them our laws were en-
forced only by penalties, without any mention of reward. It is
upon this account that the image of Justice, in their courts of
judicature, is formed with six eyes, two before, as many behind,
and on each side one, to signify circumspection; with a bag of
gold open in her right hand, and a sword sheathed in her left,
to show that she is more disposed to reward than to punish.
In choosing persons for all employments, they have more
regard to good morals than to great abilities; for, since govern-
An act of Parliament has been since passed, by which some breaches of trust have
been made capital.-Orig.
退
​98
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
ment is necessary to mankind, they believe that the common
size of human understanding is fitted to some station or other;
and that Providence never intended to make the management
of public affairs a mystery to be comprehended only by a few
persons of sublime genius, of which there seldom are three born
in an age but they suppose truth, justice, temperance, and the
like, to be in every man's power; the practice of which virtues,
assisted by experience and a good intention, would qualify any
man for the service of his country, except where a course of
study is required. But they thought the want of moral virtues
was so far from being supplied by superior endowments of the
mind, that employments could never be put into such danger-
ous hands as those of a person so qualified; and at least, that
the mistakes committed by ignorance, in a virtuous disposition,
would never be of such fatal consequence to the public weal, as
the practice of a man whose inclinations led him to be corrupt,
and who had great abilities to manage, to multiply, and to de-
fend his corruptions.
In like manner, the disbelief of a Divine Providence renders
a man incapable of holding any public station; for since kings
avow themselves to be the deputies of Providence, the Lillipu-
tians think nothing can be more absurd than for a prince to
employ such men as disown the authority under which he acts.
In relating these and the following laws, I would only be
understood to mean the original institutions, and not the most
scandalous corruptions, into which these people are fallen by
the degenerate nature of man. For, as to that infamous prac-
tice of acquiring great employments by dancing on the ropes,
or badges of favor and distinction by leaping over sticks and
creeping under them, the reader is to observe that they were
first introduced by the grandfather of the emperor now reigning,
and grew to the present height by the gradual increase of party
and faction.*
Ingratitude is among them a capital crime, as we read it
to have been in some other countries; for they reason thus:
that whoever makes ill returns to his benefactor, must needs be
a common enemy to the rest of mankind, from whom he has re-
ceived no obligation, and therefore such a man is not fit to live.
Their notions relating to the duties of parents and children
differ extremely from ours. For since the conjunction of male
and female is founded upon the great law of nature, in order
to propagate and continue the species, the Lilliputians will
*The author alludes to the prostitution of honors, and the lavish distribution of tities,
in the reign of James I.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
99
needs have it, that men and women are joined together, like
other animals, by the motives of concupiscence; and that
their tenderness towards their young proceeds from the like
natural principle: for which reason, they will never allow that
a child is under any obligation to his father for begetting him,
or to his mother for bringing him into the world: which, con-
sidering the miseries of human life, was neither a benefit in
itself, nor intended so by his parents, whose thoughts, in their
love encounters, were otherwise employed.* Upon these, and
the like reasonings, their opinion is, that parents are the last
of all others to be trusted with the education of their own
children; and therefore they have in every town public nur-
series, where all parents, except cottagers and laborers, are
obliged to send their infants of both sexes to be reared and
educated, when they come to the age of twenty moons, at which
time they are supposed to have some rudiments of docility.
These schools are of several kinds, suited to different qualities
and both sexes. They have certain professors well skilled in
preparing children for such a condition of life as befits the
rank of their parents, and their own capacities, as well as in-
clinations. I shall first say something of the male nurseries,
and then of the female.
The nurseries for males of noble or eminent birth, are pro-
vided with grave and learned professors, and their several
deputies. The clothes and food of the children are plain and
simple. They are bred up in the principles of honor, justice.
courage, modesty, clemency, religion, and love of their country;
they are always employed in some business, except in the times
of eating and sleeping, which are very short, and two hours for
diversions, consisting of bodily exercises. They are dressed
by men till four years of age, and then are obliged to dress
themselves, although their quality be ever so great; and the
women attendants, who are aged proportionably to ours ar
fifty, perform only the most menial offices. They are never
suffered to converse with servants, but go together, in smalier
or greater numbers, to take their diversions, and always in the
presence of a professor or one of his deputies; whereby tney
avoid those early bad impressions of folly and vice, to which
our children are subject. Their parents are suffered to see
them only twice a year; the visit is to last but an hour; they
are allowed to kiss the child at meeting and parting; but a
* Sir Walter Scott is of opinion that this idea is borrowed from Cyrano Bergerac's Voy-
age to the Moon, where he finds a people with whom it was the rule that parents should obey
their children.
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GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
professor, who always stands by on those occasions, will not
suffer them to whisper, or use any fondling expressions, or
bring any presents of toys, sweetmeats, and the like.
The pension from each family for the education and en-
tertainment of a child, upon failure of due payment, is levied
by the emperor's officers.
The nurseries for children of ordinary gentlémen, mer-
chants, traders, and handicrafts, are managed proportionably
after the same manner; only those designed for trades are put
out apprentices at eleven years old: whereas those of persons
of quality continue in their exercises till fifteen, which answers
to twenty-one with us; but the confinement is gradually les-
sened for the last three years.
In the female nurseries, the young girls of quality are
educated much like the males, only they are dressed by orderly
servants of their own sex ; but always in the presence of a pro-
fessor or deputy, till they come to dress themselves, which is
at five years old. And if it be found that these nurses ever
presume to entertain the girls with frightful or foolish stories,
or the common follies practised by chambermaids among us,
they are publicly whipped thrice about the city, imprisoned for
a year, and banished for life to the most desolate part of the
country. Thus the young ladies there are as much ashamed
of being cowards and fools as the men, and despise all per-
sonal ornaments, beyond decency and cleanliness: neither did
I perceive any difference in their education made by their dif-
ference of sex, only that the exercises of the females were not
altogether so robust; and that some rules were given them
relating to domestic life, and a smaller compass of learning
was enjoined them: for their maxim is, that among people of
quality, a wife should be always a reasonable and agreeable
companion, because she cannot always be young. When the
girls are twelve years old,, which among them is the marriage-
able age, their parents or guardians take them home, with
great expressions of gratitude to the professors, and seldom
without the tears of the young lady and her companions.
In the nurseries of the females of the meaner sort, the
children are instructed in all kinds of work proper for their
sex, and their several degrees; those intended for apprentices
are dismissed at seven years old, the rest are kept until eleven.
The meaner families who have children at these nurseries
are obliged, beside their annual pension, which is as low as
possible, to return to the steward of the nursery a small
monthly share of their gettings, to be a portion for the child;
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
101
and therefore all parents are limited in their expenses by the
law. For the Lilliputians think nothing can be more unjust,
than for people, in subservience to their own appetites, to bring
children into the world, and leave the burden of supporting
them on the public. As to persons of quality, they give security
to appropriate a certain sum for each child, suitable to their
condition and these funds are always managed with good
husbandry and the most exact justice.
The cottagers and laborers keep their children at home,
their business being only to till and cultivate the earth, and
therefore their education is of little consequence to the public:
but the old and diseased among them are supported by hospi-
tals; for begging is a trade unknown in this empire.
And here it may, perhaps, divert the curious reader, to give
some account of my domestics, and my manner of living in
this country, during a residence of nine months and thirteen
days. Having a head mechanically turned, and being likewise
forced by necessity, I had made for myself a table and chair
convenient enough, out of the largest trees in the royal park.
Two hundred seamstresses were employed to make me shirts
and linen for my bed and table, all of the strongest and
coarsest kind they could get, which, however, they were forced
to quilt together in several folds, for the thickest was some
degrees finer than lawn. Their linen is usually three inches
wide, and three feet make a piece. The seamstresses took my
measure as I lay on the ground, one standing at my neck, and
another at my mid-leg, with a strong cord extended, that each
held by the end, while a third measured the length of the cord
with a rule an inch long. Then they measured my right thumb,
and desired no more; for by a mathematical computation, that
twice round the thumb is once round the wrist, and so on to
the neck and the waist, and by the help of my old shirt, which
I displayed on the ground before them for a pattern; they
fitted me exactly. Three hundred tailors were employed in the
same manner to make me clothes; but they had another con-
trivance for taking my measure. I kneeled down, and they
raised a ladder from the ground to my neck; upon this ladder.
one of them mounted, and let fall a plumb-line from my collar
to the floor, which just answered the length of my coat; but
my waist and arms I measured myself. When my clothes were
finished, which was done in my house (for the largest of theirs
would not have been able to hold them), they looked like the
patchwork made by the ladies in England, only that mine were
all of a color.
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GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
I had three hundred cooks to dress my victuals, in little
convenient huts built about my house, where they and their
families lived, and prepared me two dishes apiece. I took up
twenty waiters in my hand, and placed them on the table; a
hundred more attended below on the ground, some with dishes
of meat, and some with barrels of wine and other liquors slung
on their shoulders, all which the waiters above drew up, as I
wanted, in a very ingenious manner by certain cords, as we
draw a bucket up a well in Europe. A dish of their meat was
a good mouthful, and a barrel of their liquor a reasonable
draught. Their mutton yields to ours, but their beef is excel-
lent. I have had a sirloin so large, that I have been forced to
make three bites of it; but this is rare. My servants were
astonished to see me eat it, bones and all, as in our country we
do the leg of a lark. Their geese and turkeys I usually ate at
a mouthful, and I confess they far exceed ours. Of their
smaller fowl I could take up twenty or thirty at the end of my
knife.
One day his imperial majesty, being informed of my way of
living, desired "that himself and his royal consort, with the
young princes of the blood of both sexes, might have the hap-
piness," as he was pleased to call it, "of dining with me.'
They came accordingly, and I placed them in chairs of state,
upon my table, just over against me, with their guards about
them. Flimnap, the lord high-treasurer, attended there like-
wise, with his white staff; and I observed he often looked on
me with a sour countenance, which I would not seem to regard,
but ate more than usual, in honor to my dear country, as well
as to fill the court with admiration. I have some private rea-
sons to believe, that this visit from his majesty gave Flimnap
an opportunity of doing me ill offices to his master. That
minister had always been my secret enemy, though he out-
wardly caressed me more than was usual to the moroseness of
his nature. He represented to the emperor "the low condi-
tion of his treasury; that he was forced to take up money at a
great discount; that exchequer bills would not circulate under
nine percent. below par; that I had cost his majesty above a
million and a half of sprugs (their greatest gold coin, about
the bigness of a spangle); and, upon the whole, that it would
be advisable in the emperor to take the first fair occasion of
dismissing me."
""
*Sir Robert Walpole was often reproached with false economy,-no uncommon topic
of railing against the Whigs. The parsimonious disposition of George I, has been already
noticed.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
103
I am here obliged to vindicate the reputation of an excel-
lent lady, who was an innocent sufferer on my account. The
treasurer took a fancy to be jealous of his wife, from the malice
of some evil tongues, who informed him that her Grace had
taken a violent affection for my person, and the court scandal
ran for some time, that she once came privately to my lodgings.
This I solemnly declare to be a most infamous falsehood, with-
out any grounds, farther than that her Grace was pleased to
treat me with all innocent marks of freedom and friendship.
I own she came often to my house, but always publicly, nor
ever without three more in the coach, who were usually her
sister and young daughter, and some particular acquaintance;
but this was common to many other ladies of the court; and I
still appeal to my servants round, whether they at any time
saw a coach at my door without knowing what persons were in
it. On those occasions, when a servant had given me notice,
my custom was to go immediately to the door, and after pay-
ing my respects, to take up the coach and two horses very
carefully in my hands (for, if there were six horses, the postilion
always unharnessed four), and placed them on a table, where I
had fixed a movable rim quite round, of five inches high, to pre-
vent accidents; and I have often had four coaches and horses
at once on my table, full of company, while I sat in my chair,
'leaning my face towards them; and when I was engaged with one
set, the coachmen would gently drive the others round my table.
I have passed many an afternoon very agreeably in these conver-
sations. But I defy the treasurer, or his two informers (I will
name them, and let them make the best of it), Clustril and
Drunlo to prove that any person ever came to me incognito, ex-
cept the secretary Reldresal, who was sent by express command
of his imperial majesty, as I have before related. I should not
have dwelt so long upon this particular, if it had not been a
point wherein the reputation of a great lady is so nearly con-
cerned, to say nothing of my own; though I then had the
honor to be a nardac, which the treasurer himself is not; for
all the world knows that he is only a glumglum, a title inferior
by one degree, as that of a marquis is to a duke in England;
yet I allow he, preceded me in right of his post. These false
informations, which I afterwards came to the knowledge of by
an accident not proper to mention, made the treasurer show
his lady for some time an ill countenance, and me a worse;
*
The Dean probably alludes to the inquiries made into Bolingbroke's intrigues by the
Committee of 1715, and particularly that which he was suspected of having formed with:
Madame Tencin. There are few passages in this work which can compete for grave and
quiet humor with Gulliver's earnest defence of the lady's character.
104
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
and although he was at last undeceived and reconciled to her,
yet I lost all credit with him, and found my interest decline
very fast with the emperor himself, who was, indeed, too much
governed by that favorite.
CHAPTER VII.
THE AUTHOR BEING INFORMED OF A DESIGN TO ACCUSE HIM
OF HIGH TREASON, MAKES HIS ESCAPE TO BLEFUSCU-HIS
RECEPTION THERE.
AN account of my leaving this kingdom may properly be
prefaced by some particulars of a private intrigue which had
been for two months forming against me. I had been hitherto,
all my life, a stranger to courts, for which I was unqualified by
the meanness of my condition. I had indeed heard and read
'enough of the dispositions of great princes and ministers; but
never expected to have found such terrible effects of them in
so remote a country, governed, as I thought, by very different
maxims from those in Europe.
When I was just preparing to pay my attendance on the
emperor of Blefuscu, a considerable person at court (to whom
I had been very serviceable, at a time when he lay under the
highest displeasure of his imperial majesty), came to my house
very privately at night, in a close chair, and, without sending
his name, desired admittance. The chairmen were dismissed:
I put the chair, with his lordship in it, into my coat pocket;
and giving orders to a trusty servant to say I was indisposed
and gone to sleep, I fastened the door of my house, placed the
chair on the table, according to my usual custom, and sat down
by it. After the common salutations were over, observing his
lordship's countenance full of concern, and inquiring into the
reason, he desired "I would hear him with patience, in a mat-
ter that highly concerned my honor and my life." His speech
was to the following effect, for I took notes of it as soon as he
left me:
"You are to know," said he, "that several committees of
council have been lately called, in the most private manner, on
your account; and it is but two days since his majesty came to
a full resolution.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
105
"You are very sensible that Skyresh Bolgolam (galbet, or
high-admiral) has been your mortal enemy, almost ever since
your arrival. His original reasons I know not; but his hatred
is increased since your great success against Blefuscu, by which
his glory as admiral is much obscured. This lord, in conjunc-
tion with Flimnap, the high-treasurer, whose enmity against
you is notorious on account of his lady, Limtoc the general,
Lalcon the chamberlain, and Balmuff the grand justiciary, have
prepared articles of impeachment against you, for treason and
other capital crimes."
This preface made me so impatient, being conscious of my
own merits and innocence, that I was going to interrupt him;
when he entreated me to be silent, and thus proceeded.
"Out of gratitude for the favors you have done me, I pro-
cured information of the whole proceedings, and a copy of the
articles ; * wherein I venture my head for your service."
These articles are designed to ridicule the articles of impeachment against Oxford,
Ormond, and Bolingbroke, in 1715.
There were many who believed that, in consequence of the numerous victories obtained
by the Duke of Marlborough and Prince Eugene, it would have been possible for the Allies
to have marched to Paris, and compelled Louis XIV. to purchase peace by the sacrifice of a
large portion of his dominion. Swift so far yields to popular prejudice as not to contest the
possibility of such an exploit (here typified by the complete conquest of Blefuscu), he takes
the higher ground of national justice, and insinuates that if the Allies had violated the in-
tegrity of France, they would have been guilty of the very crime which furnished a pretext
for their inveterate hostility to Louis XIV. The frivolous and vexatious character of some
of the articles of Gulliver's impeachment is scarcely an exaggeration of the trivial nature of
many of the charges brought against Queen Anne's last cabinet by the Walpole administra
tion.
106
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
ARTICLES OF IMPEACHMENT
AGAINST
QUINBUS FLESTRIN. THE MAN-MOUNTAIN.
ARTICLE 1.
44
Whereas, by a statute made in the reign of his imperial
majesty Calin Deffar Plune, it is enacted, that whosoever shall
make water within the precincts of the royal palace, shall be
liable to the pains and penalties of high-treason; notwithstand-
ing, the said Quinbus Flestrin, in open breach of the said law,
under color of extinguishing the fire kindled in the apartment
of his majesty's most dear imperial consort, did maliciously,
traitorously, and devilishly, by discharge of his urine, put out the
said fire kindled in the same apartment, lying and being within
the precincts of the said royal palace, against the statute in
that case provided, etc., against the duty, etc.
ARTICLE 2.
"That the said Quinbus Flestrin having brought the im-
perial fleet of Blefuscu into the royal port, and being afterwards
commanded by his imperial majesty to seize all the other ships
of the said empire of Blefuscu, and reduce that empire to a
province, to be governed by a viceroy from hence, and to de-
'stroy and put to death not only all the Big-endian exiles, but
likewise all the people of that empire who would not immedi-
ately forsake the Big-endian heresy; he, the said Flestrin, like
a false traitor against his most auspicious, serene, imperial
majesty, did petition to be excused from the said service, upon
pretence of unwillingness to force the consciences, or destroy
the liberties and lives of an innocent people.*
* A lawyer thinks himself honest, if he does the best he can for his client, and a states.
man, if he promotes the interests of his country: but the Dean here inculates a higher notion
of right and wrong, and obligations to a larger community.-Hawksworth,
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
107
ARTICLE 3.
"That whereas certain ambassadors arrived from the court
of Blefuscu, to sue for peace in his majesty's court, he, the said
Flestrin, did, like a false traitor, aid, abet, comfort, and divert
the said ambassadors, although he knew them to be servants
of a prince who was lately an open enemy to his imperial
majesty, and in an open war against his said majesty.
ARTICLE 4.
"That the said Quinbus Flestrin, contrary to the duty of a
faithful subject, is now preparing to make a voyage to the court
and empire of Blefuscu, for which he has received only verbal
license, from his imperial majesty, and, under color of the said
license does falsely and traitorously intend to take the said voy-
age, and thereby to aid, comfort, and abet the emperor of
Blefuscu, so lately an enemy, and in open war with his imperial
majesty aforesaid."
"There are some other articles; but these are the most im
portant, of which I have read you an abstract.
"In the several debates upon this impeachment, it must be
confessed that his majesty gave many marks of his great lenity;
often urging the services you had done him, and endeavoring
to extenuate your crimes. The treasurer and admiral insisted
that you should be put to the most painful and ignominious.
death by setting fire to your house at night; and the general
was to attend with twenty thousand men, armed with poisoned
arrows, to shoot you on the face and hands. Some of your ser-
vants were to have private orders to strew a poisonous juice on
your shirts and sheets, which would soon make you tear your own
flesh, and die in the utmost torture. The general came into the
same opinion, so that for a long time there was a majority
against you; but his majesty resolving, if possible, to spare
your life, at last brought off the chamberlain.
"Upon this incident, Reldresal, principal secretary for pri-
vate affairs, who always approved himself your true friend, was
commanded by the emperor to deliver his opinion, which he
accordingly did, and therein justified the good thoughts you
have of him. He allowed your crimes to be great, but that
still there was room for mercy, the most commendable virtue
in a prince, and for which his majesty was so justly celebrated.
He said the friendship between you and him was so well known
108
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
to the world that perhaps the most honorable board might think
him partial; however in obedience to the command he had
received, he would freely offer his sentiments. That if his
majesty, in consideration of your services, and pursuant to
his own merciful disposition, would please to spare your life,
and only to give orders to put out both your eyes, he humbly
conceived that, by this expedient, justice might in some meas-
ure be satisfied, and all the world applaud the lenity of the
emperor, as well as the fair and generous proceedings of those
who have the honor to be his counsellors. That the loss of
your eyes would be no impediment to your bodily strength, by
which you might still be useful to his majesty; that blindness
is an addition to courage, by concealing dangers from us; that
the fear you had for your eyes was the greatest difficulty in
bringing over the enemy's fleet; and it would be sufficient for
you to see by the eyes of the ministers, since the greatest
princes do no more.*
"This proposal was received with the utmost disapproba-
tion by the whole board. Bolgolam, the admiral, could not
preserve his temper; but rising up in fury, said, he wondered
how the secretary durst presume to give his opinion for preserv-
ing the life of a trator: that the services you had performed
were, by all true reasons of state, the great aggravation of your
crimes; that you, who was able to extinguish the fire by dis-
charge of urine in her majesty's apartment (which he mentioned
with horror), might, at another time raise an inundation by the
same means, to drown the whole palace; and the same strength
which enabled you to bring over the enemy's fleet, might serve,
upon the first discontent, to carry it back: that he had good
reasons to think you were a Big-endian in your heart; and, as
treason begins in the heart before it appears in overt acts, so he
accused you as a traitor on that account, and therefore insisted
you should be put to death.
"The treasurer was of the same opinion: he showed to what
straits his majesty's revenue was reduced, by the charge of
maintaining you, which would soon grow insupportable: that
the secretary's expedient of putting out your eyes, was so far
from being a remedy against this evil, that it would probably
increase it, as is manifest from the common practice of blinding
some kind of fowls, after which they fed the faster and grew
* The pretended merciful counsel of Reldresal, who proposed a commutation of punish-
ment, which, however, was worse than death, appears to be a satire on those Whigs who
proposed that the Earl of Oxford and Bolingbroke, instead of being impeached for high
treason, and thus brought in peril of life, should only be accused of high misdemeanors,
which would justify their being deprived of title and estate, and sentenced to civil death.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
109
sooner fat; that his sacred majesty and the council, who are
your judges, were, in their own consciences, fully convinced of
your guilt, which was a sufficient argument to condemn you to
death, without the formal proofs required by the strict letter
of the law.*
"But his imperial majesty, fully determined against capital
punishment, was graciously pleased to say, that since the coun-
cil thought the loss of your eyes too easy a censure, some other
may be inflicted hereafter.† And your friend the secretary,
humbly desiring to be heard again, in answer to what the treas
urer had objected, concerning the great charge his majesty was at
in maintaining you, said, that his excellency, who had the sole
disposal of the emperor's revenue, might easily provide against
that evil, by gradually lessening your establishment; by which,
for want of sufficient food, you will grow weak and faint, and
lose your appetite, and consume in a few months; neither
would the stench of your carcass be then so dangerous, when
it should become more than half diminished; and immediately
upon your death, five or six thousand of his majesty's subjects
might, in two or three days, cut your flesh from your bones,
take it away by cart-loads, and bury it in distant parts, to pre-
vent infection, leaving the skeleton as a monument of admira-
tion to posterity.
"Thus by the great friendship of the secretary, the whole
affair was compromised. It was strictly enjoined, that the
project of starving you by degrees should be kept a secret ;
but the sentence of putting out your eyes was entered on the
books; none dissenting, except Bolgolam the admiral, who,
being a creature of the empress, was perpetually instigated by
her majesty to insist upon your death, she having borne per-
petual malice against you, on account of that infamous and ille
gal method you took to extinguish the fire in her apartment.
"In three days your friend the secretary will be directed
to come to your house, and read before you the articles of im-
peachment; and then to signify the great lenity and favor of
his majesty and council, whereby you are only condemned to
There is something so odious in whatever is wrong, that even those whom it does not
subject to punishment, endeavor to color it with an appearance of right; but the attempt is
always unsuccessful, and only betrays a consciousness of deformity by showing a desire to
hide it. Thus the Lilliputian court pretended a right to dispense with the strict letter of the
law to put Gulliver to death, though by the strict letter of the law only he could be con-
victed of a crime; the intention of the statute not being to suffer the palace rather to be
burnt than so to be extinguished.-Hawksworth.
This appears to be directed against the partial pardon which was granted to Lord
Bolingbroke. George I. could never be persuaded to restore him to his rights as a peer,
though Bolingbroke bribed the Duchess of Kendal to use her powerful intercession, and
actually induced her to place his memorial in the King's own hand.
110
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
the loss of your eyes, which his majesty does not question you
will gratefully and humbly submit to; and twenty of his ma-
jesty's surgeons will attend, in order to see the operation well
performed, by discharging very sharp pointed arrows into the
balls of your eyes, as you lie on the ground.
"I leave to your prudence what measures you will take;
and to avoid suspicion, I must immediately return in as private
a manner as I came."
His lordship did so; and I remained alone, under many
doubts and perplexities of mind.
It was a custom introduced by this prince and his ministry
(very different, as I have been assured, from the practice of
former times), that after the court had decreed any cruel execu-
tion, either to gratify the monarch's resentment, or the malice of
a favorite, the emperor always made a speech to his whole
council, expressing his great lenity and tenderness as qualities
known and confessed by all the world. This speech was
immediately published throughout the kingdom;* nor did any
thing terrify the people so much, as those encomiums on his
majesty's mercy; because it was observed that the more these
praises were enlarged and insisted on, the more inhuman was
the punishment, and the sufferer more innocent. Yet as to
myself, I must confess, having never been designed for a cour-
tier, either by my birth or education, I was so ill a judge of
things, that I could not discover the lenity and favor of this
sentence, but conceived it (perhaps erroneously) rather to be
rigorous than gentle. I sometimes thought of standing my
trial; for, although I could not deny the facts alleged in the
several articles, yet I hoped they would admit of some extenua-
tion. But having in my life perused many state trials, which I
ever observed to terminate as the judges thought fit to direct,
I durst not rely on so dangerous a decision, in so critical a
juncture, and against such powerful enemies. Once, I was
strongly bent upon resistance; for, while I had liberty, the
whole strength of that empire could hardly subdue me, and I
might easily with stones pelt the metropolis to pieces; but I
soon rejected that project with horror, by remembering the
oath I had made to the emperor, the favors I received from him,
and the high title of nardac he conferred upon me. Neither
had I so soon learned the gratitude of courtiers, to persuade
* Sir Walter Scott supposes that a sarcasm is intended here against the royal proclama-
tions issued after the rebellion of 1715, but Swift more probably alludes to the King's speech
at the opening of Parliament, October 11th, 1722, wherein he informed both Houses of the
conspiracy to restore the Pretender, in which Atterbury was involved.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
113
myself that his majesty's present severities acquitted me of all
past obligations.
*
At last I fixed upon a resolution for which it is probable I
may incur some censure, and not unjustly, for I confess I owe
the preserving of mine eyes, and consequently my liberty, to my
own great rashness and want of experience; because, if I had
then known the nature of princes and ministers, which I have
since observed in many other courts, and their methods of
treating criminals less obnoxious than myself, I should, with
great alacrity and readiness, have submitted to so easy a
punishment. But hurried on by the precipitancy of youth,
and having his imperial majesty's license to pay my attendance
upon the emperor of Blefuscu, I took this opportunity, before
the three days were elapsed, to send a letter to my friend, the
secretary, signifying my resolution of setting out that morning
for Blefuscu, pursuant to the leave I had got; and, without
waiting for an answer, I went to that side of the island where
our fleet lay. I seized a large man-of-war, tied a cable to the
prow, and lifting up the anchors, I stripped myself, put my
clothes (together with my coverlet, which I carried under my
arm) into the vessel, and drawing it after me, between wading
and swimming, arrived at the royal port of Blefuscu, where the
people had long expected me; they lent me two guides to direct
me to the capital city, which is of the same name. I held them
in my hands till I came within two hundred yards of the gate,
and desired them "to signify my arrival to one of the secretaries,
and let him know I there waited his majesty's command." I
had an answer in about an hour, "that his majesty, attended
by the royal family, and great officers of the court, was coming
out to receive me." I advanced a hundred yards. The em
peror and his train alighted from their horses, the empress
and ladies from their coaches, and I did not perceive they were
in any fright or concern. I lay on the ground to kiss his
majesty's and the empress's hands. I told his majesty, "that
1 was come according to my promise, and with the license of
Gulliver's defence of himself for escaping to Blefuscu is a covert apology for Eoling-
broke's flight to France in 1715; a circumstance which was frequently quoted as decisive
proof of his guilt, and censured as an act of imprudence by many who believed in his inno-
cence. The Dean insinuates that it was, like that of Gulliver, rendered necessary by the
malice of the ministers of the day: and it must be confessed that the mode in which the
articles of impeachment were urged forward, gave too much reason to believe that Boling
broke's death was predetermined by his accusers.
This bitter stroke of irony is directed against the acts of Parliament by which Ormond,
Bolingbroke, and the Bishop of Rochester, were attained. Swift gave rather a perilous
proof of his belief in the innocence of the Duke of Ormond, when, after that nobleman's
attainder, the heralds from the Irish College of Arms went to remove his escutcheon from
St. Patrick's Cathedral, Swift refused them admittance, and persevered in keeping the
Duke's coat of arms in its ancient place of honor.
112
GULLIVER'S TRAVI S.
the emperor my master, to have the hor r of seeing so mighty
a monarch, and to offer him any service my power, consistent
with my duty to my own prince ;" not mentioning a word of my
disgrace, because I had hitherto no regular information of it,
and might suppose myself wholly ignorant of any such design:
neither could I reasonably conceive that the emperor would
discover the secret, while I was out of his power; wherein,
however, it soon appeared I was deceived.
I shall not trouble the reader with the particular account of
my reception at this court, which was suitable to the generosity
of so great a prince: nor of the difficulties I was in for want of
a house and bed, being forced to lie on the ground, wrapped up
in my coverlet.*
CHAPTER VIII.
THE AUTHOR, BY A LUCKY ACCIDENT, FINDS MEANS TO LEAVE
BLEFUSCU; AND, AFTER SOME DIFFICULTIES, RETŪRNS SAFE
TO HIS NATIVE COUNTRY.
THREE days after my arrival, walking out of curiosity to the
north-east coast of the island, I observed, about half a league
off in the sea, somewhat that looked like a boat overturned. I
pulled of my shoes and stockings, and wading two or three
hundred yards, I found the object to approach nearer by force
of the tide; and then plainly saw it to be a real boat, which I
supposed might by some tempest have been driven from a ship:
whereupon I returned immediately towards the city, and de-
sired his imperial majesty to lend me twenty of the tallest ves-
sels he had left, after the loss of his fleet, and three thousand
seamen, under the command of his vice-admiral. This fleet
sailed round, while I went back the shortest way to the coast,
where I first discovered the boat. I found the tide had driven
it still nearer. The seamen were all provided with cordage,
which I had beforehand twisted to a sufficient strength. When
the ships came up, I stripped myself, and waded till I came
within a hundred yards of the boat, after which I was forced to
swim till I got up to it. The seamen threw me the end of the
1
N
*The author probably alludes to the severe hardships endured by many of the Jacobite
axiles in Franco.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
113
cord, which I fastened to a hole in the fore part of the boat,
and the other end to a man-of-war; but I found all my labor
to little purpose; for, being out of my depth, I was not able to
work. In this necessity I was forced to swim behind, and push
the boat forward as often as I could with one of my hands ;
and the tide favoring me, I advanced so far that I could just
hold up my chin and feel the ground. I rested two or three
minutes, and then gave the boat another shove, and so on, till
the sea was no higher than my armpits; and now the most
laborious part being; over, I took out my other cables, which
were stowed ir. one of the ships, and fastened them first to the
boat, and then to nine of the vessels which attended me; the
wind being favorable, the seamen towed, and I shoved, until
we arrived within forty yards of the shore, and waiting till the
tide was out, I got lry to the boat, and by the assistance of
two thousand men with ropes and engines, I made a shift to
turn it on its bottom, and found it was but little damaged.
I shall not trouble the reader with the difficulties I was
under, by the help of certain paddles, which cost me ten days
making, to get my oat to the royal port of Blefuscu, where´a
mighty concourse of people appeared upon my arrival, full of
wonder at the sight of so prodigious a vessel. I told the em-
peror "that my good. ortune had thrown this boat in my way,
to carry me to some place whence I might return into my native
country; and begged his majesty's orders for getting materials
to fit it up; together with his license to depart;" which, after
some kind expostulations, he was pleased to grant.
I did very much wonder, in all this time, not to have heard *
of any express relating to me from our emperor to the court of
Blefuscu. But I was afterwards given privately to understand,
that his imperial majesty, never imagining I had the least notice
of his designs, believed I was only gone to Blefuscu in perform-
ance of my promise, according to the license he had given me,
which was well known at our court, and would return in a few
days, when the ceremony was ended. But he was at last in
pain at my long absence; and after consulting with the treas-
urer and the rest of that cabal, a person of quality was dis
patched with the copy of the articles against me.
This envoy
had instructions to represent to the monarch of Blefuscu, "the
great lenity of his master, who was content to punish me no
farther than with the loss of mine eyes; that I had fled from
Ang
"I did very much wonder not to have heard," etc. This sentence is ungrammatical;
it should have been, "I did very much wonder, in all this time, at not having heard of any
exprèse,” etc.—Sheridan.
An
114
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
justice; and if I did not return in two hours, I should be de-
prived of my title of nardac, and declared a traitor." The
envoy farther added, “that in order to maintain the peace and
amity between both empires, his master expected that his
brother of Blefuscu would give orders to have me sent back to
Lilliput, bound hand and foot, to be punished as a traitor.” *
The emperor of Blefuscu, having taken three days to con-
sult, returned an answer consisting of many civilities and ex-
cuses. He said, "that, as for sending me bound, his brother
knew it was impossible; that although I had deprived him of
his fleet, yet he owed great obligations to me for many good.
offices I had done him in making the peace. That, however,
both their majesties would soon be made easy; for I had found
a prodigious vessel on the shore, able to carry me on the sea,
which he had given orders to fit up, with my own assistance
and direction; and he hoped, in a few weeks, both empires
would be freed from so insupportable an incumbrance."
With this answer the envoy returned to Lilliput, and the
monarch of Blefuscu related to me all that had passed; offer-
ing me at the same time (but under the strictest confidence)
his gracious protection if I would continue in his service;
wherein although I believed him sincere, yet I resolved never
more to put any confidence in princes or ministers, where I
could possibly avoid it; and therefore, with all due acknowl-
edgments for his favorable intentions, I humbly begged to be
excused. I told him, that "since fortune, whether good or
evil, had thrown a vessel in my way, I was resolved to 'venture
myself on the ocean, rather than be an occasion of difference
between two such mighty monarchs. Neither did I find the
emperor at all displeased; and I discovered, by a certain acci-
dent, that he was very glad of my resolution, and so were most
of his ministers. *
These considerations moved me to hasten my departure some-
*This embassy from Lilliput is designed to satirize the frequent remonstrances made
to the French court by the English ministers, in consequence of the protection granted to
the Jacobites.
† This irony is directed against the jealousy with which Bolingbroke, during his exile,
was regarded by the French ministers. His restless spirit of intrigue rendered him scarcely
less formidable at Versailles than he had been at St. James's. During his exile, Boling
broke entered into the Pretender's service, but soon quarrelled with his master, and was
formally attainted at the mock court of St. James's. It was a singular fortune to be
secretary to and attainted by both governments. Swift has invariably eulogized Bolingbroke
as a pure patriot; but he was far from deserving that character. "His life," says a recent
writer, "was chiefly spent in retirement, and though not highly exemplary of practical
wisdom, he was looked up to with oracular veneration by contemporary wits and politicians.
He was a fine speaker and highly accomplished man; of great energy and decision of
character; but unscrupulous, and lacked the integrity of principle and singleness of purpose
which inspire confidence and lead to unquestioned excellence. He was ambitious, covetous
of superiority, resentful; lax in morals, a partisan in politics, and an infidel in religion.”
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
113
what sooner than I intended; to which the court, impatient to
have me gone, very readily contributed. Five hundred work-
men were employed to make two sails to my boat, according
to my directions, by quilting thirteen folds of their strongest
linen together. I was at the pains of making ropes and cables,
by twisting ten, twenty, or thirty of the thickest and strongest
of theirs. A great stone that I happened to find, after a long
search, by the sea-shore, served me for an anchor. I had the
tallow of three hundred cows, for greasing my boat, and other
uses. I was at incredible pains in cutting down some of the
largest timber trees for oars and masts, wherein I was, how-
ever, much assisted by his majesty's ship-carpenters, who helped
me in smoothing them, after I had done the rough work.
In about a month, when all was prepared, I sent to receive
his majesty's commands, and to take my leave. The emperor
and royal family came out of the palace; I lay down on my
face to kiss his hand, which he very graciously gave me ; so
did the empress and young princes of the blood. His majesty
presented me with fifty purses of two hundred sprugs apiece,
together with his picture at full length, which I put immediately
into one of my gloves, to keep it from being hurt. The cere-
monies at my departure were too many to trouble the reader
with at this time.
I stored the boat with carcasses of a hundred oxen and
three hundred sheep, with bread and drink proportionable,
and as much meat ready-dressed as four hundred cooks could
provide. I took with me six cows and two bulls alive, with as
many ewes and rams, intending to carry them into my own
country and propagate the breed; and to feed them on board,
I had a good bundle of hay, and a bag of corn. I would gladly
have taken a dozen of the natives, but this was a thing the em-
peror would by no means permit; and, besides a diligent
search into my pockets, his majesty engaged my honor "not
to carry away any of his subjects, although with their own con-
sent and desire."
Having thus prepared all things as well as I was able, I
set sail, on the twenty-fourth day of September, 1701, at six in
the morning; and when I had gone about four leagues to the
northward, the wind being at south-east, at six in the evening, I
descried a small island, about half a league to the north-west.
I advanced forward, and cast anchor on the lee side of the
island, which seemed to be uninhabited. I then took some re-
freshment and went to my rest. I slept well, and as I con-
jecture, a least six hours for I found the day broke in two
116
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
hours after I awaked. It was a clear night. I ate my break.
fast before the sun was up; and heaving anchor, the wind be
ing favorable, I steered the same course that I had done the
day before, wherein I was directed by my pocket-compass.
My intention was to reach, if possible, one of those islands
which I had reason to believe lay to the north-east of Van
Diemen's Land. I discovered nothing all that day; but upon
the next, about three in the afternoon, when I had by my com-
putation, made twenty-four leagues from Blefuscu, I descried
a sail steering to the south-east; my course was due east. I
hailed her, but could get no answer; yet I found I gained
upon her, for the wind slackened. I made all the sail I could,
and in half an hour she spied me, then hung out her ancient,
and discharged a gun. It is not easy to express the joy I was
in, upon the unexpected hope of once more seeing my beloved
country, and the dear pledges I left in it. The ship slackened
her sails, and I came up with her between five and six in the
evening, September twenty-sixth; but my heart leaped within
me to see her English colors. I put my cows and sheep into
my coat-pockets, and got on board with all my little cargo of
provisions. The vessel was an English merchantman, return-
ing from Japan, by the North and South seas; the captain,
Mr. John Biddel, of Deptford, a very civil man and an excel-
lent sailor. We were now in the latitude of 30 degrees south
there were about fifty men in the ship; and here I met an old
comrade of mine, one Peter Williams, who gave me a good
character to the captain. This gentleman treated me with
kindness, and desired I would let him know what place I came
from last, and whither I was bound; which I did in a few words,
but he thought I was raving, and that the dangers I had under-
went * had disturbed my head; whereupon I took my black
cattle and sheep out of my pocket, which, after great astonish-
ment, clearly convinced him of my veracity. I then showed
him the gold given me by the emperor of Blefuscu, together
with his majesty's picture at full length, and some other rari-
ties of that country. I gave him two purses of two hundred
sprugs each, and promised when we arrived in England, to
make him a present of a cow, and a sheep big with young.
I shall not trouble the reader with a particular account of
this voyage, which was very prosperous for the most part. We
arrived in the Downs on the 13th of April, 1702. I had only
one misfortune, that the rats on board carried away one of my
* "I had underwent," is not English; it should have been "I had undergone,” or “I
anderwent.”
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
17
sheep: I found her bones in a hole, picked clean from the
flesh. The rest of my cattle I got safe ashore, and set them
a-grazing on a bowling-green at Greenwich, where the fineness
of the grass made them feed very heartily, though I had al-
ways feared the contrary: neither could I possibly have pre-
served them in so long a voyage, if the captain had not allowed
me some of his best biscuit, which, rubbed to powder, and
mingled with water, was their constant food. The short time
I continued in England, I made a considerable profit by show-
ing my cattle to many persons of quality and others; and be-
fore I began my second voyage I sold them for six hundred
pounds. Since my last return I find the breed is considerably
increased, especially the sheep, which I hope will prove much
to the advantage of the woollen manufacture, by the fineness
of the fleeces.*
I stay but two months with my wife and family, for my in-
satiable desire of seeing foreign countries would suffer me to
continue no longer. I left fifteen hundred pounds with my
wife, and fixed her in a good house at Redriff. My remaining
stock I carried with me, part in money and part in goods, in
hopes to improve my fortunes. My eldest uncle John had left
me an estate in land near Epping of about thirty pounds a
year, and I had a long lease of the Black Bull in Fetter Lane,
which yielded me as much more; so that I was not in any dan-
ger of leaving my family upon the parish. My son Johnny,
named so after his uncle, was at the grammar-school, and a
towardly child. My daughter Betty (who is now well married,
and has children) was then at her needlework. I took leave
of my wife and boy and girl, with tears on both sides, and
went on board the Adventure, a merchant ship of three hun-
dred tons, bound for Surat, Captain John Nicholas, of Liver-
pool, commander. But my account of this voyage must be re-
ferred to the Second Part of my Travels.
*This is a passing sarcasm on the numerous acts of Parliament for encouraging the
woollen manufacturers, and the various schemes proposed in Swift's time for improving the
growth and fineness of wool. There is probably no other subject on which greater blunders
have been made in commercial legislation than the English woollen trade, nor any which
more clearly shows the futility of protecting duties and direct encouragement from Parlia
ment. Swift provoked the indignation of the party in power, by protesting earnestly
against the commercial jealousy which annihilated the woollen manufactures of Ireland, under
pretence of their interfering with the staple manufacture of England: but wool was the
favorite hobby of his day, and projects for extending the trade formed no small part of the
bubbles of 1720.
APPENDIX
TO THE
VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT.
LILLIPUT and its court were, as we have shown, designed as
a sarcastic description of England in the reigns of Anne and
the First of the Georges, but the explanation of the satire would
scarcely be complete without Swift's opinions of the statesmen
of his day, which he has recorded in MS. notes on Macky's
Memoirs. They are very pithy and characteristic.
Harley, Earl of Oxford." He is skilled in most things,
and very eloquent."-Macky. A great lie: he could not prop-
erly be called eloquent; but he knew how to prevail on the
House with few words and strong reasons.-Swift's MS.
Lord John Poulet.-"One of the hopefullest gentlemen in
England; very learned, virtuous, and a man of honor."-M.
This character is fair enough.—S.
Legge, Lord Dartmouth.—“ He sets up for a critic in con-
versation, makes jests and loves to laugh at them, takes a great
deal of pains in his office, and is in a fair way of rising at
court."-M. This is right enough, but he has little sincerity.
-S.
Wharton, Lord Wharton.-" He is one of the completest
gentlemen in England; hath a very clear understanding, and
manly expression, with an abundance of wit."-M. The most
universal villain I ever saw.-S.
Powlett, Duke of Bolton." He does not now make any
figure at court."-M. Nor anywhere else: a great booby.—Š.
Charles, Viscount Townshend.-"He is beloved by every-
body that knows him."-M. I except one.-S.
John, Lord Somers." This distinguished lawyer was born
(119)
120
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
at Worcester in 1652, of a creditable family."-M. Very mean;
his father was a noted rogue. I allow him to have possessed
all excellent qualities except virtue; he had violent passions,
and hardly subdued them by his great prudence.-S.
Matthew Prior." He is very well at court with the ministry,
and is an entire creature of Lord Jersey, whom he supports by
his advice is one of the best poets in England, but very fac-
tious in conversation; a thin, hollow-looked man."-M. This
is near the truth.-S.
:
Charles, Lord Halifax.-" He is a great encourager of learn.
ing and learned men; is the patron of the Muses; of very agree›
able conversation; a short, fat man."-M. His encouragement
were only good words and dinners. I never heard him say one
good thing or seem to taste what was said by others.-S.
Charles, Duke of Somerset." He is a lover of music and
poetry; of good judgment."-M. Not a grain: hardly com-
mon sense.-S. (See a more extended character in the history
of the four last years of Queen Anne.)
Daniel, Earl of Nottingham.-"He hath the exterior air of
business, and application enough to make him very capable
in his habits and manners very familiar."-M. He fell in with
the Whigs; was an endless talker.-S. (See as before.)
Charles, Lord Mohun.-" He is brave in his person, bold in
his expressions, and rectifies as fast as he can the slips of his
youth by acts of honesty."-M. He was little better than a
conceited talker in company.—S.
John, Duke of Argyle.-"His family will not lose in his
person, the great figure they have made for so many ages."-
M. Ambitious, covetous, cunning Scot; has no principle but
his own interest and greatness. A true Scot in his whole con-
duct.-S.
Montague Venables Bertie.-" A gentleman of fine parts."
Very covetous.-S.
-M.
Mr. Davenant.-" A very giddy-headed young fellow, with
some wit."-M. He is not worth mentioning.-S.
Sir Paul Methuen.-"A man of intrigue, but very muddy
in his conceptions, and not quickly understood in anything.'
-M. A profligate rogue, without religion or morals; but
cunning enough, yet without abilities of any kind.-S.
Mr. Aglionby." Envoy to the Swiss Cantons."-M. He
had been a Papist.-S.
Marquis of Breadalbane.“ He is cunning as a fox, wise as
a serpent, but slippery as an eel."-M. A blundering, rattle-
pated, drunken sot.-S.
APPENDIX TO LILLIPUT.
121
Mr. Carstairs." He is the cunningest subtle dissembler în
England; a dangerous enemy because always hid. He is a
fat, sanguine-complexioned, fair man; always smiling when he
deigns most mischief; a good friend when he is sincere.”—M.
A true character, but not strong enough by a fiftieth part.
-S.
Philip, Earl of Chesterfield." He is above sixty years old."
-M. If it be old Lord Chesterfield, I have heard he was the
greatest knave in England.-S.
—M.
Lord Cholmondeley." Hath good sense."-M. Good for
nothing, as far as ever I knew.-S.
Lord Delawarr.-"A free jolly gentleman."-M. Of very
little sense; but formal, and well stored with the low kind of
the lowest politics.-S.
Charles, Earl of Dorset.-" Of great learning."-M. Small
or none.-S. "He is still one of the pleasantest men in the
world, when he likes his company."-M. Not of late years,
but a very dull one.-S.
Earl of Feversham.-"Turned of fifty years old."-M. A
very dull old fellow.-S.
CC
Andrew Fletcher of Saltoun. Są zealous an asserter of the
liberties of the people, that he is too jealous of the growing
* ɔwer of all princes."-M. A most arrogant, conceited pedant
in politics; cannot endure the least contradiction in any of his
visions or paradoxes.-S.
Charles, Duke of Grafton.-" A very pretty gentleman."-
M. Almost a slobberer, without one good quality.-S.
Earl of Grantham.-" A very pretty gentleman."-M. Good
for nothing.-S.
Lord Gray of Wark.—“ A zealous asserter of the liberties
of the people."-M. Had very little in him.-S.
Lord Guilford." Does not want sense."-M. A mighty
silly fellow.-S.
Sir Charles Hare.-"Hath good understanding, and abun
dance of learning."-M. His father was a groom; he was a
man of sense, without one grain of honesty.-S.
Mr. Hill." He is a favorite to both parties." -M. To
neither.-S.
Secretary Johnstoun.-" He is very honest, yet something
too credulous and suspicious. He would not tell a lie for the
world."-M. A treacherous knave. One of the greatest knaves
even in Scotland.-S.
Earl of Kent.-"Has good sense."-M. He seems a good-
natured man. byt of very little consequence-S.
122
GÜLLIVER'S TRAVELS.
Earl of Lindsey." Has both wit and learning."-M. I
never observed a grain of either.-S.
Lord Lucas." He is every way a very plain man.”—M.
A good plain humdrum.-S.
Mr. Mansel.-"He is a gentleman of a great deal of wit
and good nature."-M. But of very moderate capacity.-S.
Duke of Montague.-" An admirer of learning and learned
men."-M. As great a knave as any in his time.-S.
Marquis of Montrose." He inherits great qualities."-M.
Now very homely, and makes a sorry appearance.-S.
Duke of Richmond.-"Good-natured-to a fault."-M. A
shallow coxcomb.-S.
Earl of Sandwich.-"Of very ordinary parts."-M. As
much a puppy as I ever saw.-S.
Mr. Smith." A bold orator."-M. I thought him a heavy
man.-S.
Earl of Stamford.-"A very honest man."-M. He looked
and talked like a very weak man; but it was said he spoke well
in council.-S.
George Stepney." One of the best poets now in England."
-M. Scarce a third rate.-S.
Archbishop Tenison.—“A plain, good heavy man.”—M.
The most good-for-nothing prelate I ever knew.-S.
Earl of Weems.-"A fine personage, and very beautiful."
M. He was a black man, and handsome for a Scot.-S.
The characters of the Dukes of Marlborough and Somerset,
the Duchess of Marlborough, the Earls of Godolphin, Sunder-
land, and Wharton, Nottingham and Lord Cowper, are deline
ated in the history of the last four years of Queen Anne, to
which we refer our readers.
L'ABBE DESFONTAINES, the first translator of Gulliver's
Travels into French, terrified by the boldness of Swift's philo-
sophic speculations, suppressed and altered several passages;
such a proceeding might be pardoned at a time when a rigid
censorship was exercised over the press, but the same leniency
cannot be shown to his numerous interpolations, which com-
pletely change the character of the work. One of these unfor
tunate additions is, however, not devoid of interest; it continues
with considerable humor Swift's account of the manners and
customs of Lilliput, and contains come valuable hints on the
APPENDIX TO LILLIPUT.
123
subject of education, worthy of the pen of Voltaire's great antag-
onist. As the Abbé's translation is scarcely known in England,
we shall add this passage as a specimen of his interpolations :
"The Lilliputians surpass most European nations in the
attention bestowed on the education of children. They com-
pare instruction to horticulture. It is not enough, say they, to
sow the seed and produce the plants, their growth must be
tended with fostering care; they must be sheltered against
winter's bitter blasts, and summer's scorching heats, the attacks
of insects must be repelled, the skilful gardener must tend the
opening of the bud and the unfolding of the blossom, or he has
no right to expect perfect and ripened fruit. They take care
that the teacher should have a well-balanced mind rather than
a lofty intellect; they look to his morals rather than his science.
They cannot endure those pedantic teachers who cram their
pupils with grammatical niceties, frivolous discussions, and idle
puerilities; they do not explain the structure of the living lan-
guage by reference to a dead language with which it has very
few relations; their grammar is not a system of dry rules and
tedious exceptions; they make their pupils learn the proprie-
ties of speech by usage and custom, by familiarizing them with
examples taken from the best writers, instead of burdening
their memory with the complexities of syntax and the niceties
of prosody. They are anxious that the teacher should be fa-
miliar and friendly with his pupils, nothing in their opinion being
more averse to a sound education than pedantry, and a morose
affectation of dignity. They insist that the master should
rather descend to the level of his scholar than aim at rising far
above him; and they believe that the former is a far more diffi-
cult acquirement than the latter, condescension requiring more
tact, delicacy, and strength of mind, than the assumption of su-
periority.
"They insist that teachers should endeavor rather to train
youthful minds for the active pursuits of real life than to load
them with rare and curious stores of knowledge which are not
capable of practical application. Consequently, they teach them
from the outset to be prudent and discreet, so that in the very
season of enjoyment they should know how to moderate their in-
dulgence in pleasure. Is it not ridiculous, say they, to defer
moral instruction to the very last, to place ethics at the end,
and not at the beginning of the course; to keep people ignor-
ant of the real nature and use of the enjoyments of life until
the season when they can be best appreciated is past; to teach
the arts of life only when death is near at hand, and to point
полити
124
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS:
out the proper purposes of existence, only when that existence
is drawing to its close?
"They reward their children for a prompt and ready con-
fession of their faults; and they bestow grace and favors on
those who can give the best account and explanation of their
errors. A great object of their system is to stimulate the curi-
osity of the young; they encourage them to ask questions
about everything they see and hear; and they punish severely
those who have witnessed any extraordinary event or phe-
nomenon without manifesting curiosity or astonishment.
"They inculcate the most dutiful obedience and loyalty to
the sovereign, but at the same time they exert themselves to
prevent this feeling from degenerating into slavish submission,
by carefully distinguishing between the respect due to the station
of governing power and the personal attachment which belongs
only to indivduals. They believe that the confusion of the two
principles has often grievously wounded the conscience, ex-
posed liberty to imminent dangers, and produced great misfor-
tunes to states.
"Lecturers on history take less trouble to teach their pupils
the dates of events, than to explain the characters, the good
and evil dispositions of kings, of generals, and of statesmen,
and also to show how far their natural propensities may be sup-
posed to have been modified by circumstances. They believe
that it is of little value to know that such a battle was fought
in such or such a year; but that it is important to consider
what multitudes of men in every century have been barbarous,
brutal, unjust, sanguinary, always ready to throw away their
own lives without necessity, and attack the lives of others with-
out cause. How many wars have been waged which were pòs-
itively disgraceful to humanity, and how powerful the motives
must have been that led to such fatal results. They deem
the history of the progress of human intelligence the best
of all histories, and they are anxious that their pupils should
estimate facts rather than merely retain them in the memory.
"They are anxious, that a love for the sciences should be
limited, and that each pupil should choose the branch of study
most in accordance with his talents and inclinations; they
esteem a man who reads too much, as scarcely better than a
man who eats too much; asserting that the mind is subject to
indigestion as well as the body. The emperor alone possesses
a large and extensive library. The private bibliomaniacs who
accumulate large collections of volumes, are contemptuously
called 'donkeys laden with books.'
APPENDIX TO LILLIPUT.
125
Philosophy with these people is a cheerful and lively
study, not as with us, smothered beneath the solemn trifling and
pedantic jargon of the schools. They know nothing of syllo-
gisms, categories, first and second intentions, and the other
cramboes and follies of dialectics. Their philosophy consists
in establishing infallible principles, which lead the mind to pre-
fer the moderate condition of an honest man to the riches and
pride of a financier; and they honor the victories obtained over
the passions more than the greatest triumphs won by con-
querors. It teaches them to live temperately, to avoid every
species of voluptuous indulgence, to shun everything which
tends to render the mind dependent on the body, and thus de-
stroys the freedom of the understanding.
"Pupils are exhorted to choose their future pursuits with
great deliberation, and endeavors are made to guide them in
the selection of the most suitable course; less regard is paid to
property than to intelligence, so that the son of a laborer is
often a minister of state, and the son of a lord engaged in trade,
Physics and mathematics are esteemed in Lilliput only so far
as these sciences are profitable to actual life and the progress
of the useful arts. In general they have little anxiety to be
acquainted with every part of the universe, and they prefer en-
joying nature without examination to reasoning on the order
and motion of physical bodies. With regard to metaphysics,
they look upon the entire subject as the baseless fabric of a
vision.
"
They hate all affectation in language and style, whether
in verse or prose; and they say that peculiarities of expression
are not less contemptible tan peculiarities of dress. An
author who quits the natural style to indulge in bombastic
language, extraordinary metaphors, and quaint figures, is
hissed and hooted through the streets, like a monk at the
"carnival.
(C
'The mind and body are cultivated at the same time by
the Lilliputians; for the object of education is to form a man,
and therefore no part of his nature should be neglected. They
compare the soul and body to two steeds yoked under a car-
riage, mischief must arise if one goes faster than the other.
Whilst you devote your attention exclusively to the child's
mind, say they, his figure may become distorted, his strength
weakened, or his health injured; if you only attend to the per-
son, the mind lies fallow, and may soon be overgrown by the
seeds of stupidity and ignorance.
“It is forbidden to inflict any painful chastisement on chil-
£26
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
dren; they are punished by withholding some enjoyment, by
shame, or by the privation of two or three lessons: the last
mortifies them extremely, because they seem to be abandoned
to themselves, and declared unworthy of instruction. Pain, in
their opinion, tends only to render children cowards, and tim-
idity is a very prejudicial defect, which can rarely if ever be
cured."
TO QUINBUS FLESTRIN, THE MAN-MOUNTAIN.
An Ode.
BY TITTY TIT, ESQ.
POET LAUREATE TO HIS MAJESTY OF LILLIPUT,
Translated into English.
In amaze,
Lost, I gaze!
Can our eyes
Reach thy size?
May my lays
Swell with praise!
Worthy thee!
Worthy me!
Muse inspire
All thy fire.
Bards of old
Of him told,
When they said
Atlas' head
Propp'd the skies:
See, and believe your eyes.
See him stride
Valleys wide:
Over woods,
Over floods,
When he treads,
Mountains' heads
Groan and shake;
Armies quake,
Lest his spurn
Overturn
Man and steed:
Troops take heed!
Left and right,
Speed your flight!
Lest an host
Beneath his feet be lost.
APPENDIX TO LILLIPUT.
民生​學
​Turn'd aside
From his hide,
Safe from wound
Darts rebound;
From his nose
Clouds he blows;
When he speaks,
Thunder breaks!
When he eats,
Famine threats;
When he drinks,
Neptune shrinks!
Nigh thy ear,
In mid air,
On thy hand
Let me stand
So shall I,
Lofty poet, touch the sky
A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAG.*
CHAPTER I.
GREAT STORM DESCRIBED; THE LONG BOAT SENT TO FETCH
WATER, THE AUTHOR GOES WITH IT TO DISCOVER THE COUN-
TRY-HE IS LEFT ON SHORE, IS SEIZED BY ONE OF THE NA-
TIVES, AND CARRIED TO A FARMER'S HOUSE-HIS RECEPTION,
WITH SEVERAL ACCIDENTS THAT HAPPENED THERE-A DE-
SCRIPTION OF THE INHABITANTS.
An active and restless life having been assigned me by na-
ture and fortune, in two months after my return I again left
my native country, and took shipping in the Downs, on the
20th day of June, 1702, in the Adventure, Captain John Nicho-
* The existence of giants as a distinct race, superior in strength and stature to the rest
of mankind, was long maintained as an article of faith, not merely by the ignorant and
vulgar, but by men of learning. According to the Rabbins, Adam was not only the first but
the largest of mankind: they affirm that when he was created, his stature was so great that
his head reached the heavens. This so annoyed the angels that thy remonstrated with the
Creator, upon which God placed his hand on Adam's head, and he instantly shrank into one
thousand cubits. When the Garden of Eden was disjoined from the rest of the world, after
the Fall, by the interposition of the ocean, they assert that Adam waded through the depths
to his new habitation, and that Eve accompanied him without fear of drowning; which she
might well do, if, as the Mohammedan doctors tell us, when her head lay on a hill near
Mecca, her knees rested on two others in the plain, more than two bowshots asunder.
??
Not only Jewish but Christian writers have maintained that a gigantic antediluvian race
was produced by the intercourse between "the sons of God" and "the daughters of men
(Gen. 6:5). And they aver that these giants were destroyed by the universal deluge.
Hence the Douay version renders Job 26: 5: "Behold the giants groan under the
waters, and they that dwell with them. Hell is naked before them, and there is no cover
for perdition." To this sublime version the following comment is added: "Giants were
not able to wade in Noah's flood, but were drowned with the rest. The Rabbins, however,
make an exception in favor of Og, king of Basan, compared to whom, according to their
legends, all other giants were mere Lilliputians. The waters of the Deluge, they say, only
reached to his knees, and he was alive at the time of Exodus, when God destroyed him by
the hand of Moses. For Og, perceiving the advance of the Israelites, whose army covered
a space of nine miles, cut a stone out of a mountain, so wide that it would have covered the
whole army, and he put it on his head that he might throw it upon them. But God sent
a lapwing which pecked a hole through the stone, so that it slipped over Og's head, and
hung round his neck like a necklace. The weight bore him to the ground on his face, and
in this condition he was attacked by Moses. Moses was ten cubits in stature, and he
took a spear ten cubits long, and threw it ten cubits high, and yet it only reached Og's
heels. Moses, however, succeeded in slaying him; and when he was dead, his body lay
for a whole year, reaching as far as the river Nile in Egypt.
The feats of the giants who warred against the gods are sufficiently known, and they may
9
(139)
130
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
las, a Cornishman, commander, bound for Surat. We had a
very prosperous gale, till we arrived at the Cape of Good
Hope, where we landed for fresh water; but discovering a leak,
we unshipped our goods, and wintered there; for the captain
falling sick of an ague, we could not leave the Cape till the
end of March. We then set sail, and had a good voyage till
we passed the straits of Madagascar ; but having got north-
ward of that island, and to about five degrees south latitude,
the winds, which in those seas are observed to blow a constant
equal gale between the north and west, from the beginning
of December to the beginning of May, on the 19th of April
began to blow with much greater violence, and more westerly
than usual, continuing so for twenty days together: during
which time, we were driven a little to the east of the Molucca
Islands, and about three degrees northward of the line, as our
captain found by an observation he took the 2d of May, at
which time the wind ceased, and it was a perfect calm; where-
be passed over as purely mythological. But brave historians have recorded that Scandi-
navia was originally inhabited by giants, one of whom, according to Olaus Magnus, was an
eminent poet; and, unlike the rest of the tuneful brotherhood, wrote against indulgence in
love and wine. Britain, if we may trust Grafton's Chronicle, was similarly tenanted:
"Brute with his companie after his first landing in the island of Totnesse, searched and
travailed throughout all the land, and found the same to be marvellous ryche and plentifull of
wood and pasture, and garnished with most goodly and pleasant ryvers and stremes; and as
he passed he was encountered in sundry places with a great number of mightie and strong
gyants, which at that time did inhabite the same."
A belief in the existence of whole nations of giants is only now beginning to fade away
before the gradual progress of geographical discovery. The ancients supposed that giants
possessed the interior of Africa. In the time of Purchas (A.D. 1614), the Indians of Vir
ginia were supposed to belong to the race of Anak, for he gives the following account of a
Virginian tribe, on the authority of Alexander Whitaker, an early traveller in these regions:
The Sasquesahanockes are a giantly people, strange in proportion, behavior, and attire,
their voice sounding from them as out of a cave, their attire of bears' skins, hanged with
bears' paws the head of a wolf, and such like jewels; and (if any would have a spoone to
eat with the divele) their tobacco-pipes were three-quarters of a yard long, carved at the
great end with a bird, beare, or other device, sufficient to beat out the brains of a horse (and
how many asses' braines are beat out, or rather men's braines smoked out and asses' braines
haled in, by our lesse pipes at home?), the rest of their furniture was suitable. The calf of
one of their legges was measured three-quarters of a yard about, the rest of his limbs pro-
portionable." The exaggerated accounts of the Patagonians, published by Magellan and
Le Maire, had not been refuted in Swift's time; so late as 1764, Commodore Byron declared
that their stature filled him with astonishment. Hence Brobdingnag, considered merely as
a fiction, did not seer so extravagant in the early part of the eighteenth as it does in the
nineteenth century.
Lucian in his True History, and Bishop Godwin in his whimsical account of Doming
Gonsales' journey to the moon, have introduced gigantic races into their fictions. It is very
probable that Swift took his first hint of the Brobdingnaggians from the latter; for, like the
bishop, he associates mildness and gentleness with enormous stature. "Many of the
lunarians," says the author of the World in the Moon, "live wonderful long, even beyond
belief; affirming to me that some survived thirty thousand moons, which is above a thousand
years; and this is generally noted, that the taller people are of stature, the more excellent
are their endowments of mind, and the longer time they live; for their stature is very
different, great numbers not much exceeding ours, who seldom live above a thousand moons,
which is fourscore of our years. These they account base unworthy creatures, but one
degree above brute beasts, and employ them in mean and servile offices, calling them
bastards counterfeits, or changelings. Those whom they account true natural lunars, or
noon-men, exceed ours generally thirty times, both in quantity of body and length of life
proportionable to the quality of the day in both worlds; their containing almost thirty
our days."
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
134
at I was not a little rejoiced. But he being a man well experi-
enced in the navigation of those seas, bid us all prepare against
a storm, which accordingly happened on the day following;
for the southern wind, called the southern monsoon, began to
set in.
Finding it was likely to overblow,* we took in our sprit-sail,
and stood by to hand the foresail; but, making foul weather,
we looked the guns were all fast, and handed the mizzen. The
ship lay very broad off, so we thought it better spooning before
the sea, then trying or hulling. We reefed the foresail and set
him, and hauled aft the foresheet; the helm was hard-a-weather.
The ship wore bravely. We belayed the fore downhaul; but
the sail was split, and we hauled down the yard, and got the
sail into the ship, and unbound all the things clear of it. It
was a very fierce storm; the sea broke strange and dangerous.
We hauled off upon the laniard of the whipstaff, and helped
the man at the helm. We would not get down our topmast,
but let all stand, because she scudded before the sea very well,
and we knew that the topmast being aloft, the ship was the
wholesomer, and made better way through the sea, seeing we
had sea-room. When the storm was over, we set foresail and
mainsail, and brought the ship to. Then we set the mizzen,
maintopsail, and the foretopsail. Our course was east-north-
east, the wind was at south-west. We got the starboard tacks
aboard, we cast off our weather braces and lifts; we set in the
lee braces, and hauled forward by the weather-bowlings, and
hauled them tight, and belayed them, and hauled over the miz-
zen tack to windward, and kept her full and by as near as she
would lie. During this storm, which was followed by a strong
wind west-south-west, we were carried, by my computation,
about five hundred leagues to the east, so that the oldest sailor
on board could not tell in what part of the world we were. Our
provisions held out well, our ship was stanch, and our crew all
in good health; but we lay in the utmost distress for water.
We thought it best to hold on the same course, rather than
turn more northerly, which might have brought us to the north-
west part of Great Tartary, and into the Frozen Sea.
On the 16th day of June, 1703, a boy on the topmast dis-
covered land. On the 17th, we came in full view of a great
island, or continent (for we knew not whether); on the south
side whereof was a small neck of land jutting out into the sea, and
* This is a parody upon the account of storms and naval manoeuvres frequent in aid
voyages, and is merely an assemblage of sea-terms put together at random.
132
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
a creek too shallow to hold a ship of above one nundred tons.
We cast anchor within a league of this creek, and our captain
sent a dozen of his men well armed in the long-boat, with ves-
sels for water, if any could be found. I desired his leave to go
with them, that I might see the country, and make what discov
eries I could. When we came to land, we saw no river, or
spring, nor any sign of inhabitants. Our men therefore wan-
dered on the shore to find out some fresh water near the sea,
and I walked alone about a mile on the other side, where I ob-
served the country all barren and rocky. I now began to be
weary, and seeing nothing to entertain my curiosity, I returned
gently down towards the creek; and the sea being full in my.
view. I saw our men already got into the boat, and rowing for
life to the ship. I was going to holla after them, although it
had been to little purpose, when I observed a huge creature
walking after them in the sea, as fast as he could he waded
not much deeper than his knees, and took prodigious strides :
but our men had the start of him half a league, and the sea there
abouts being full of sharp-pointed rocks, the monster was not able
to overtake the boat. This I was afterwards told, for I durst
not stay to see the issue of the adventure, but ran as fast as I
could the way I first went, and then climbed up a steep hill,
which gave me some prospect of the country. I found it fully
cultivated; but that which first surprised me was the length of
the grass, which, in those grounds that seemed to be kept for
hay, was about twenty feet high.
I fell into a highroad, for so I took it to be, though it served
to the inhabitants only as a foot-path through a field of barley.
Here I walked on for some time, but could see little on either
side, it being now near harvest, and the corn rising at least forty
feet. I was an hour walking to the end of this field, which was
fenced in with a hedge of at least one hundred and twenty feet
high, and the trees so lofty that I could make no computation
of their altitude. There was a stile to pass from this field into
the next. It had four steps, and a stone to cross over when you
come to the uppermost. It was impossible for me to climb this
stile, because every step was six feet high, and the upper stone
about twenty. I was endeavoring to find some gap in the hedge,
when I discovered one of the inhabitants in the next field, ad-
vancing towards the stile, of the same size with him whom I
saw in the sea pursuing our boat. He appeared as tall as an
ordinary spire steeple, and took about ten yards at every stride,
as near as I could guess. I was struck with the utmost fear
and astonishment, and ran to hide myself in the corn, whence
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
133
I saw him at the top of the stile looking back into the next field,
on the right hand, and heard him call in a voice many degrees
louder than a speaking-trumpet; but the noise was so high in
the air, that at first I certainly thought it was thunder. Where-
upon seven monsters, like himself, cane towards him, with reap-
ing-hooks in their hands, each hook about the largeness of six
scythes. These people were not so well clad as the first, whose
servants or laborers they seemed to be; for, upon some words
he spoke, they went to reap the corn in the field where I lay.
I kept from them at as great a distance as I could, but was
forced to move with extreme difficulty, for the stalks of corn
were sometimes not above a foot distant, so that I could hardly
squeeze my body betwixt them. However, I made a shift to go
forward, till I came to a part of the field where the corn had
been laid by the rain and wind. Here it was impossible for me
to advance a step; for the stalks were so interwoven, that I
could not creep through, and the beards of the fallen ears so
strong and pointed, that they pierced through my clothes into
my flesh. At the same time I heard the reapers not above a
hundred yards behind me. Being quite dispirited with toil, and
wholly overcome by grief and despair, I lay down between two
ridges, and heartily wished I might there end my days. I be-
moaned my desolate widow and fatherless children. I lamented
my own folly and wilfulness, in attempting a second voyage,
against the advice of all my friends and relations. In this ter
rible agitation of mind, I could not forbear thinking of Lilliput,
whose inhabitants looked upon me as the greatest prodigy that
ever appeared in the world; where I was able to draw an im-
perial fleet in my hand, and perform those other actions, which
will be recorded forever in the chronicles of that empire, while
posterity shall hardly believe them, although attested by mil-
lions. I reflected what a mortification it must prove to me to
appear as inconsiderable in this nation, as one single Lilliputian
would be among us.
But this I conceived was to be the least
of my misfortunes; for, as human creatures are observed to be
more savage and cruel in proportion to their bulk, what could I
expect but to be a morsel in the mouth of the first among these
enormous barbarians that should happen to seize me? Un-
doubtedly philosophers are in the right when they tell us that
nothing is great or little otherwise than by comparison. 1
might have pleased fortune, to have let the Lilliputians find
some nation where the people were as diminutive with respec
to them, as they were to me. And who knows but that even this
prodigious race of mortals might equany over match.

134
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
some distant part of the world, whereof we have yet o dis
covery?
*
Scared and confounded as I was, I could not forbear going
on with these reflections, when one of the reapers approaching
within ten yards of the ridge where I lay, made me apprehend
that with the next step I should be squashed to death under
his foot, or cut in two with his reaping-hook. And therefore,
when he was again about to move, I screamed as loud as fear
could make me; whereupon the huge creature trod short, and
looking round about under him for some time, at last espied
me as I lay on the ground. He considered awhile, with the
caution of one who endeavors to lay hold on a small dangerous
animal in such a manner that it shall not be able either to
scratch or bite him, as I myself have sometimes done with a
weasel in England. At length he ventured to take me behind,
by the middle, between his forefinger and thumb, and brought
me within three yards of his eyes, that he might behold my
shape more perfectly. I guessed his meaning, and my good
fortune gave me so much presence of mind, that I resolved
not to struggle in the least as he hold me in the air above sixty
feet from the ground, although he grievously pinched my sides,
for fear I should slip through his fingers. All I ventured was
to raise mine eyes toward the sun, ard place my hands together
in a supplicating posture, and to speak some words in an
humble melancholy tone, suitable to the condition I then was
in: for I apprehended every moment that he would dash me
against the ground, as we usually do any little hateful animal
which we have a mind to destroy. But my good star would
ave it, that he appeared pleased with my voice and gestures,
and began to look upon me as a curiosity, much wondering to
hear me pronounce articulate words, although he could not
understand them. In the mean time I was not able to forbear
groaning and shedding tears, and turning my head towards my
sides; letting him know, as well as I could, how cruelly I was
hurt by the pressure of his thumb and finger. He seemed to
apprehend my meaning; for, lifting up the lappet of his coat,
he put me gently into it, and immediately ran along with me to
his master, who was a substantial farmer, and the same person
I had first seen in the field.
The farmer having (as I suppose by their talk) received
such an account of me as his servant could give him, tock a
The satire in the account of the Voyage to Lilliput is for the most part personal, but in
the account of Brobdingnag the satire is general, and directed against institutions rather tha
individuals. There are, however, a few sarcastic hits in the account given of the court of
Brobdingnag.which bore hard on the statesmen of the day.-Percy, Bishop of Drasmier W
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
13
piece of a small straw, about the size of a walking-staff, and
therewith lifted up the lappets of my coat, which, it seems, he
thought to be some kind of covering that nature had given me.
He blew my hair aside to take a better view of my face. He
called his hinds about him, and asked them, as I afterwards
learned, "Whether they had ever seen in the fields any little
creature that resembled me?" he then placed me softly on the
ground on all fours, but I immediately got up, and walked
slowly backward and forward, to let those people see I had no
intent to run away. They all sat down in a circle about me,
the better to observe my motions. I pulled off my hat, and
made a low bow towards the farmer. I fell on my knees, and
lifted up my hands and eyes, and spoke several words as loud
as I could; I took a purse of gold out of my pocket, and humbly
presented it to him.
to him. He received
He received it on the palm of his hand,
and then applied it close to his eye to see what it was, and
afterwards turned it several times with the point of a pin
(which he took out of his sleeve), but could make nothing of it.
Whereupon I made a sign that he should place his hand or
the ground. I then took the purse, and opening it, poured all
the gold into his palm. There were six Spanish pieces of four
pistoles each, beside twenty or thirty smaller coins. I saw
him wet the tip of his little finger upon his tongue, and take
up one of my largest pieces, and then another; but he seemed
to be wholly ignorant what they wer He made me a sign to
put them again into my purse, and the purse again into my
pocket, which, after offering it to him several times, I thought
it best to do.
The farmer, by this time, was convinced I must be a ra
tional creature. He spoke often to me, but the sound of his
voice pierced my ears like that of a watermill, yet his words
were articulate enough. I answered as loud as I could n
several languages, and he often laid his ear within two yaras
of me; but all in vain, for we were wholly unintelligible to
each other. He then sent his servants to their work, and taking
his handkerchief out of his pocket, he doubled and spread it or
his left hand, which he placed flat on the ground with the palm
upward, making me a sign to step into it, as I could easily do
for it was not above a foot in thickness. I thought it my part
to obey, and, for fear of falling, laid myself at full length upon
the handkerchief, with the remainder of which he lapped me uf
to the head for farther security, and in this manner carried me
home to his house. There he called his wife, and showed me
her; but she screamed and ran back, as women in Englaud
136
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
do at the sight of a toad or a spider. However, when she had
awhile seen my behavior, and how well I observed the signs
her husband made, she was soon reconciled, and by degrees
grew extremely tender of me.
It was about twelve at noon and a servant brought in dinner.
It was only one substantial dish of meat (fit for the plain con-
dition of a husbandman), in a dish of about four-and-twenty
feet diameter. The company were, the farmer and his wife,
three children, and an old grandmother. When they were sat
down, the farmer placed me at some distance from him on the
table, which was thirty feet high from the floor. I was in a
terrible fright, and kept as far as I could from the edge, for
fear of falling. The wife minced a bit of meat, then crumbled
some bread on a trencher, and placed it before me. I made
her a low bow, took out my knife and fork, and fell to eat,
which gave them exceeding delight. The mistress sent her
maid for a small dram cup, which held about two gallons, and
filled it with drink; I took up the vessel with much difficulty in
both hands, and in a most respectful manner drank to her
ladyship's health, expressing the words as loud as I could in
English, which made the company laugh so heartily that I was
almost deafened with the noise. This liquor tasted like a
small cider, and was not unpleasant. Then the master made
me a sign to come to his trencher side; but as I walked on the
table, being at great surprise all the time, as the indulgent
reader will easily conceive and excuse, I happened to stumble
against a crust, and fell flat on my face, but received no hurt.
I got up immediately, and observing the good people to be in
much concern, I took my hat (which I held under my arm out
of good manners), and waving it over my head, gave three
huzzas, to show I had got no mischief by my fall. But ad-
vancing forward towards my master (as I shall henceforth call
him), his youngest son, who sat next to him, an arch boy of
about ten years old, took me up by the legs, and held me so
high in the air that I trembled every limb; but his father
snatched me from him, and at the same time gave him such a
box on the left ear as would have felled an European troop of
horse to the earth, ordering him to be taken from the table.
But being afraid the boy might owe me a spite, and well remem-
bering how mischievous all children among us naturally are to
sparrows, rabbits, young kittens, and puppy dogs, I fell on my
knees, and pointing to the boy, made my master to understand
as well as I could, that I desired his son might be pardoned.
The father complied, and the lad took his seat again, where
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
137
upon I went to him and kissed his hand, which my master
took, and made him stroke me gently with it.
In the midst of dinner, my mistress's favorite cat leaped
into her lap. I heard a noise behind me like that of a dozer
stocking-weavers at work; and turning my head, I found it
proceeded from the purring of that animal, who seemed to be
three times larger than an ox, as I computed by the view of her
head, and one of her paws, while her mistress was feeding and
stroking her. The fierceness of this creature's countenance
altogether discomposed me; though I stood at the farther end
of the table, above fifty feet off; and though my mistress held
her fast, for fear she might give a spring, and seize me in her
talons. But it happened there was no danger, for the cat took
not the least notice of me, when my master placed me within
three yards of her. And as I have been always told, and found
true by experience in my travels, that flying or discovering fear
before a fierce animal, is a certain way to make it pursue or
attack you, so I resolved, in this dangerous juncture, to show
no manner of concern. I walked with intrepidity five or six
times before the very head of the cat, and came within half a
yard of her; whereupon she drew herself back, as if she were
more afraid me. I had less apprehension concerning the dogs,
whereof three or four came into the room, as it is usual in farmers'
houses; one of which was a mastiff, equal in bulk to four ele-
phants, and a greyhound somewhat taller than the mastiff, but
not so large.
When dinner was almost done, the nurse came in with a
child of a year old in her arms, who immediately spied me, and
began a squall that you might have heard from London Bridge
to Chelsea, after the usual oratory of infants, to get me for a
plaything. The mother, out of pure indulgence, took me up,
and put me towards the child, who presently seized me by the
middle, and got my head into his mouth, where I roared so loua
that the urchin was frighted, and let me drop, and I should in-
fallibly have broke my neck, if the mother had not held her
apron under me. The nurse, to quiet her babe made use of a
rattle, which was a kind of hollow vessel filled with great stones,
and fastened by a cable to the child's waist; but all in vain ; so
that she was forced to apply the last remedy by giving it suck.
I must confess no object ever disgusted me so much as the sight
of her monstrous breast, which I cannot tell what to compare
with, so as to give the curious reader an idea of its bulk, shape,
and color. It stood prominent six feet, and could not be less
than sixteen in circumference. The nipple was about half the
138
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
bigness of my head, and the hue both of that and the dug, £3
varied with spots, pimples, and freckles, that nothing could appear
more nauseous: for I had a near sight of her, she sitting down,
the more conveniently to give suck, and I standing on the table.
This made me reflect upon the fair skins of our English ladies,
who appear so beautiful to us, only because they are of our own
size, and their defects not to be seen but through a magnifying-
glass; where we find by experiment, that the smoothest and
whitest skins look rough, coarse, and ill-colored.
I remember, when I was at Lilliput, the complexions of
those diminutive people appeared to me the fairest in the world;
and talking upon the subject with a person of learning there,
who was an intimate friend of mine, he said that my face ap-
peared much fairer and smoother when he looked on me from
the ground, than it did upon a nearer view, when I took him up
n my hand and brought him close, which he confessed was at
irst a very shocking sight. He said "he could discover great
holes in my skin; that the stumps of my beard were ten times
tronger than the bristles of a boar, and my complexion made up
of several colors, altogether disagreeable;" although I must beg
have to say for myself, that I am as fair as most of my sex and
Bountry, and very little sunburned by all my travels. On the
her side, discoursing of the ladies in that emperor's court, he
red to tell me, "one had freckles, another too wide a mouth,
third too large a nose;" nothing of which I was able to dis-
guish. I confess this reflection was obvious enough; which,
owever, I could not forbear, lest the reader might think those
at creatures were actually deformed: for I must do them the
tice to say, they are a comely race of people; and particu
ly the features of my master's countenance, although he
ere but a farmer, when I beheld him from the height of sixty
, appeared very well proportioned.
When dinner was done, my master went out to his laborers,
d as I could discover by his voice and gesture, gave his wife
a strict charge to take care of me. I was very much tired and
disposed to sleep, which my mistress perceiving, she put me on
her own bed, covered we with a clean white handkerchief, but
arger and coarser than the mainsail of a man-of-war.
I slept about two hours, and dreamt I was at home with my
wife and children, which aggravated my sorrows when I awaked,*
nd found myself alone, in a vast room, between two and three
undred feet wide, and about two hundred high, lying in a bed
s ought to have been "awoke," the preterit of the verb neuter, not "awaked," the
3es the verb active.-Sheridan.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
139
twenty yards wide. My mistress was gone about her household
affairs, and had locked me in. The bed was eight yards from
the floor. Some natural necessities required me to get down.
I durst not presume to call; and if I had, it would have been
in vain, with such a voice as mine, at so great a distance as from
the room where I lay to the kitchen where the family kept.
While I was under these circumstances, two rats crept up the
curtains, and ran smelling backwards and forwards on the bed.
One of them came up almost to my face, whereupon I rose in
a fright, and drew out my hanger to defend myself. These
horrible animals had the boldness to attack me on both sides,
and one of them held his forefeet at my collar; but I had the
good fortune to rip up his belly before he could do me any
mischief. He fell down at, my feet; and the other, seeing the
fate of his comrade, made his escape, but not without one good
wound on the back, which I gave him as he fled, and made the
blood run trickling from him. After this exploit, I walked
gently to and fro on the bed, to recover my breath and loss
of spirits. These creatures were of the size of a large mastiff,
but infinitely more nimble and fierce; so that if I had taken
off my belt before I went to sleep, I must have infallibly been
torn to pieces and devoured. I measured the tail of the dead
rat, and found it to be two yards long, wanting an inch; but
it went against my stomach to draw the carcass off the bed,
where it lay still bleeding. I observed it had yet some life, but
with a strong slash across the neck, I thoroughly dispatched it.
Soon after, my mistress came into the room, who seeing me
all bloody, ran and took me up in her hand. I pointed to the
dead rat, smiling, and making other signs, to show I was not
hurt; whereat she was extremely rejoiced, calling the maid to
take up the dead rat with a pair of tongs, and throw it out of
the window. Then she set me on a table, where I showed her
my hanger all bloody, and wiping it on the lappet of my coat
returned it to the scabbard. I was pressed to do more than
one thing which another could not do for me, and therefore en-
deavored to make my mistress understand that I desired to be
set down on the floor; which after she had done, my bashful-
ness would not suffer me to express myself farther, than by
pointing to the door, and bowing several times. The good wo-
man, with much difficulty, at last perceived what I would be at,
and taking me up again in her hand, walked into the garden,
where she set me down. I went on one side about two hun
dred yards, and beckoning to her not to look or to follow me,
I hid myself between two leaves of sorrel, and there discharged
the necessities of nature.
140
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
I hope the gentle reader will excuse me for dwelling on
these and the like particulars, which, however insignificant they
may appear to grovelling vulgar minds, yet will certainly help
a philosopher to enlarge his thoughts and imagination, and ap-
ply them to the benefit of public as private life, which was my
sole design in presenting this, and other accounts of my travels.
to the world; wherein I. have been chiefly studious of truth,
without affecting any ornaments of learning or of style. But
the whole scene of this voyage made so strong an impression
on my mind, and is so deeply fixed in my memory, that in com-
mitting it to paper I did not omit one material circumstance:
however, upon strict review, I blotted out several passages of
less moment, which were in my first copy, for fear of being
censured as tedious and trifling, whereof travellers are often,
perhaps not without justice, accused.
CHAPTER II.
A DESCRIPTION OF THE FARMER'S DAUGHTER-THE AUTHOR
CARRIED TO A MARKET TOWN, AND THEN TO THE ME-
TROPOLIS-THE PARTICULARS OF HIS JOURNEY.
My mistress had a daughter of nine years old, a child of
towardly parts for her age, very dexterous at her needle, and
skilful in dressing her baby. Her mother and she contrived to
fit up the baby's cradle for me against night: the cradle was
put into a small drawer of a cabinet, and the drawer placed
upon a hanging shelf for fear of the rats.
This was my
bed all the time I stayed with those people, though made
more convenient by degrees, as I began to learn their lan-
guage and make my wants known. This young girl was
so handy, that after I had once or twice pulled off my clothes
before her, she was able to dress and undress me, though
I never gave her that trouble when she would let me do
either myself. She made me seven shirts, and some other
linen, of as fine cloth as could be got, which indeed was coarser
than sackcloth; and these she constantly washed for me with
her own hands. She was likewise my school-mistress, to
teach me the language; when I pointed to anything, she
told me the name of it in her own tongue, so that in a few days
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
141
age.
✰ was able to call for whatever I had a mind to.
She was very
good-natured, and not above forty feet high, being little for her
She gave me the name of Grildrig, which the family
took up, and afterwards the whole kingdom. The word im-
ports what the Latins call nanunculus, the Italians homunceletino,
and the English mannikin. . To her I chiefly owe my preserva-
tion in that country; we never parted while I was there; I
called her my Glumdalclitch, or little nurse: and should be guilty
of great ingratitude, if I omitted this honorable mention of her
care and affection towards me, which I heartily wish it lay in
my power to requite as she deserves, instead of being the in-
nocent, but unhappy instrument of her disgrace, as I have too
much reason to fear.
It now began to be known and talked of in the neighbor-
hood, that my master had found a strange animal in the field,
about the bigness of a splacnuck, but exactly shaped in every
part like a human creature; which it also imitated in all its ac-
tions; seemed to speak in a little language of its own, had
already learned several words of theirs, went erect upon two
legs, was tame and gentle, would come when it was called, do
whatever it was bid, had the finest limbs in the world, and a
complexion fairer than a nobleman's daughter of three years
old. Another farmer, who lived hard by, and was a particular
friend of my master, came on a visit on purpose to inquire into
the truth of this story. I was immediately produced and placed
upon a table, where I walked as I was commanded, drew my
hanger, put it up again, made my reverence to my master's
guest, asked him in his own language how he did, and told him
he was welcome, just as my little nurse had instructed me. This
man, who was old and dim-sighted, put on his spectacles to be-
hold me better; at which I could not forbear laughing very
heartily, for his eyes appeared like the full moon shining into
a chamber at two windows. Our people, who discovered the
cause of my mirth, bore me company in laughing, at which the
old fellow was fool enough to be angry, and out of countenance,
He had the character of a great miser; and, to my misfortune,
he well deserved it, by the cursed advice he gave my master, to
show me as a sight upon a market-day in the next town, which
was half an hour's riding, about two and twenty miles from our
house. I guessed there was some mischief contriving, when I
observed my master and his friend whispering long together,
sometimes pointing at me; and my fears made me fancy that
I overheard and understood some of their words. But the next
morning Glumdalclitch, my little nurse, told me the whole
142
GULLIVER'S "TRAVELS.
matter, which she had cunningly picked out from her mother.
The poor girl laid me on her bosom, and fell a weeping with
shame and grief. She apprehended some mischief would
happen to me from rude vulgar folks, who might squeeze me to
death, or break one of my limbs by taking me in their hands.
She had also observed how modest I was in my nature, how
nicely I regarded my honor, and what an indignity I should
conceive it to be exposed for money as a public spectacle to
the meanest of the people. She said, her papa and mamma
had promised that Grildrig should be hers; but now she found
they meant to serve her as they did last year, when they pre
tended to give her a lamb, and yet, as soon as it was fat, sold
it to a butcher. For my own part, I may truly affirm, that I
was less concerned than my nurse. I had a strong hope, which
never left me, that I should one day recover my liberty; and
as to the ignominy of being carried about for a monster, I con-
sidered myself to be a perfect stranger in the country, and that
such a misfortune could never be charged upon me as a re-
proach, if ever I should return to England; since the king of
Great Britain himself, in my condition, must have undergone
the same distress.
My master, pursuant to the advice of his friend, carried
me in a box the next market-day to the neighboring town, and
took along with him his little daughter, my nurse, upon a pil-
lion behind him. The box was close on every side, with a
little door for me to go in and out and a few gimlet-holes to
let in air. The girl had been so careful as to put the quilt of
her baby's bed into it, for me to lie down on. However, I was
terribly shaken and discomposed in this, journey, though it
were * but of half an hour; for the horse went about forty
feet at every step, and trotted so high, that the agitation was
equal to the rising and falling of a ship in a great storm, but
much more frequent. Our journey was somewhat farther than
from London to St. Albans. My master alighted at an inn
which he used to frequent; and after consulting awhile with
the innkeeper, and making some necessary preparations, he
hired the grultrud, or crier, to give notice through the town, of
a strange creature to be seen at the sign of the Green Eagle,
not so big as a splacnuck (an animal in that country very finely
shaped, about six feet long), and in every part of the body
resembling a human creature, could speak several words, and
perform a hundred diverting tricks.
The subjunctive mood is improperly used here; it should have been the indicative,
"though it was,” instead of "though it were. ”—Sheridan.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
143
I was placed upon a table in the largest room of the inn,
which might be near three hundred feet square. My little
nurse stood on a low stool close to the table, to take care of
me, and direct what I should do. My master, to avoid a crowd,
would suffer only thirty people at a time to see me. I walked
about on the table as the girl commanded, she asked me ques-
tions, as far as she knew my understanding of the language
reached, and I answered them as loud as I could. I turned
about several times to the company, paid my humble respects,
said they were welcome, and used some other speeches I had
been taught. I took up a thimble filled with liquor, which
Glumdalclitch had given me for a cup, and drank their health
I drew out my hanger, and flourished with it after the manner
of fencers in England. My nurse gave me a part of a straw,
which I exercised as a pike, having learned the art in my youth.
I was that day shown to twelve sets of company, and as often
forced to act over again the same fopperies, till I was half
dead with weariness and vexation; for those who had seen me
made such wonderful reports, that the people were ready to
break down the doors to come in.* My master, for his own
interest, would not suffer any one to touch me except my nurse;
and to prevent danger, benches were set round the table at
such a distance as to put me out of everybody's reach. How-
ever, an unlucky schoolboy aimed a hazelnut directly at my
head, which very narrowly missed me; otherwise it came with
so much violence, that it would have infallibly knocked out my
brains, for it was almost as large as a small pumpion; but I
had the satisfaction to see the young rogue well beaten, and
turned out of the room.
My master gave public notice that he would show me again
the next market-day; and in the mean time he prepared a
more convenient vehicle for me, which he had reason enough
to do; for I was so tired with my first journey, and with en-
tertaining company for eight hours together, that I could hardly
stand upon my legs, or speak a word. It was at least three
days before I recovered my strength, and that I might have no
rest at home, all the neighboring gentlemen from a hundred
miles round, hearing of my fame, came to see me at my mas-
ter's own house. There could not be fewer than thirty persons,
The passion for shows and sight-seeing was never at a greater height in England than
during the reign of George I.; and the wags of the day derived great amusement from prac-
ticing on the credulity of the people. Immense crowds assembled to see a man creep into
a quart bottle, and when they discovered that they had been deceived, were near destroying
the house in their rage. Swift's works contain several amusing parodies of the puffing
Nacards in which these exhibitions were announced.
Lás
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
with their wives and children (for the country is very populous);
and my master demanded the rate of a full room whenever he
showed me at home, although it were only to a single family:
so that for some time, I had but little ease every day of the
week, (except Wednesday, which is their Sabbath,) although I
was not carried to the town.
My master finding how profitable I was likely to be, resolved
to carry me to the most considerable cities of the kingdom.
Having, therefore, provided himself with all things necessary
for a long journey, and settled his affairs at home, he took
leave of his wife, and upon the 17th of August, 1703, about
two months after my arrival, we set out for the metropolis,
situate near the middle of that empire, and about three thou-
sand miles' distance from our house. My master made his
daughter Glumdalclitch ride behind him. She carried me on
her lap, in a box tied about her waist. The girl had lined it
on all sides with the softest cloth she could get, well quilted
underneath, furnished it with her baby's bed, provided me with
linen and other necessaries, and made everything as convenient
is she could. We had no other company but a boy of the
house, who rode after us with the luggage.
My master's design was to show me in all the towns by the
way, and to step out of the road, for fifty or a hundred miles,
to any village or person of quality's house, where he might
expect custom. We made easy journeys, of not above seven
or eight score miles a day; for Glumdalclitch, on purpose to
spare me, complained she was tired with the trotting of the
horse. She often took me out of my box, at my own desire,
to give me air, and show me the country, but always held me
fast by a leading-string. We passed over five or six rivers,
many degrees broader and deeper than the Nile or the Ganges;
and there was hardly a rivulet so small as the Thames at Lon-
don Bridge. We were ten weeks in our journey, and I was
shown in eighteen large towns, besides many villages, and private
families.
!
On the 26th day of October we arrived at the metropolis,.
called in their language Lorbrulgrud or Pride of the Universe,
My master took a lodging in the principal street of the city,
not far from the royal palace, and put out bills in the usual
form, containing an exact description of my person and parts.
He hired a large room between three and four hundred feet
wide. He provided a table sixty feet in diameter, upon which
I was to act my part, and palisadoed it round three feet from
the edge, and as many high, to prevent my falling over. I
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
145
was shown ten times a day, to the wonder and satisfaction of
all people. I could now speak the language tolerably well,
and perfectly understood every word that was spoken to me.
Besides, I had learned their alphabet, and could make a shift
to explain a sentence here and there; for Glumdalclitch had
been my instructor while we were at home, and at leisure hours
during our journey. She carried a little book in her pocket,
not much larger than a Sanson's Atlas; it was a common trea-
tise for the use of young girls, giving a short account of their
religion out of this she taught me my letters, and interpreted
the words.
CHAPTER III.
THE AUTHOR SENT FOR TO COURT-THE QUEEN BUYS HIM OF
HIS MASTER THE FARMER, AND PRESENTS HIM TO THE KING
-HE DISPUTES WITH HIS MAJESTY'S GREAT SCHOLARS—AN
APARTMENT AT COURT PROVIDED FOR THE AUTHOR-HE IS
IN HIGH FAVOR WITH THE QUEEN-HE STANDS UP FOR THE
HONOR OF HIS OWN COUNTRY-HIS QUARRELS WITH THE
QUEEN'S DWARF.
LABORS such as I underwent every day, made, in a few
weeks, a very considerable change in my health: the more my
master got by me, the more insatiable he grew. I had quite
lost my stomach, and was almost reduced to a skeleton. The
farmer observed it, and concluding I must soon die, resolved
to make as good a hand of me as he could. While he was
thus reasoning and resolving with himself, a sardral, or gentle-
man-usher, came from court, commanding my master to carry
me immediately thither for the diversion of the queen and her
ladies. Some of the latter had already been to see me, and
reported strange things of my beauty, behavior, and good
sense. Her majesty, and those who attended her, were beyond
measure delighted with my demeanor. I fell on my knees, and
begged the honor of kissing her imperial foot; but this gra-
cious princess held out her little finger towards me, after I was
set on the table, which I embraced in both my arms, and put
the tip of it with the utmost respect to my lip. She made me
some general questions about my country and my travels, which
I answered as distinctly, and in as few words as I could.
She
IO
146
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
asked, "whether I would be content to live at court?
bowed down to the board of the table, and humbly answered,
"that I was my master's slave; but if I were at my own dis-
posal, I should be proud to devote my life to her majesty's ser-
vice." She then asked my master, "whether he was willing to
sell me at a good price?" He, who apprehended I could not
ve a month, was ready enough to part with me, and demanded
I thousand pieces of gold, which were ordered him on the spot,
ach piece being about the bigness of eight hundred moidores;
but allowing for the proportion of all things between that coun-
try and Europe, and the higher price of gold among them, was
hardly so great a sum as a thousand guineas would be in Eng-
land. I then said to the queen, "since I was now her majesty's
most humble creature and vassal, I must beg the favor that
Glumdalclitch, who had always tended me with so much care
and kindness, and understood to do it so well, might be ad-
mitted into her service, and continue to be my nurse and in-
structor."
Her majesty agreed to my petition, and easily, got the
farmer's consent, who was glad enough to have his daughter
preferred at court, and the poor girl herself was not able to
hide her joy. My late master withdrew, bidding me farewell,
and saying he had left me in a good service; to which I replied
not a word, only making him a slight bow.
The queen observed my coldness, and, when the farmer was
gone out of the apartment, asked me the reason. I made bold
to tell her majesty, "that I owed no other obligation to my
late master, than his not dashing out the brains of a poor harm-
less creature, found by chance in his fields, which obligation
was amply recompensed by the gain he had made in showing
me through half the kingdom, and the price he now sold me
for. That the life I had since led, was laborious enough to kill
an animal of ten times my strength. That my health was much
impaired by the continual drudgery of entertaining the rabble.
every hour of the day; and that, if my master had not thought
my life in danger, her majesty would not have got so cheap a
bargain. But as I was out of all fear of being ill-treated, under
the protection of so great and good an empress, the ornament
of nature, the darling of the world, the delight of her subjects,
the phoenix of the creation; so I hoped my late master's appre-
hensions would appear to be groundless; for I already found
my spirits revive, by the influence of her most august presence.
"}
This was the sum of my speech, delivered with great impro-
prieties and hesitation. The latter part was altogether framed
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
147
in the style peculiar to that people, whereof I learned some
phrases from Glumdalclitch, while she was carrying me to
court.
The queen, giving great allowance for my defectiveness in
speaking, was, however, surprised at so much wit and good
sense in so diminutive an animal. She took me in her own
hand, and carried me to the king, who was then retired to his
cabinet. His majesty, a prince of much gravity and austere
countenance, not well observing my shape at first view, asked
the queen, after a cold manner, "how long it was since she
grew fond of a splacnuck?" for such it seems he took me to be,
as I lay upon my breast in her majesty's right hand. But this
princess, who has an infinite deal of wit and humor, set me
gently on my feet upon the scrutoire, and commanded me to
give his majesty an account of myself, which I did in a very
few words, and Glumdalclitch, who attended at the cabinet
door, and could not endure I should be out of her sight, being
admitted, confirmed all that had passed from my arrival at her
father's house.
The king, although he be as learned a person as any in his
dominions, had been educated in the study of philosophy, and
particularly mathematics; yet when he observed my shape ex-
actly, and saw me walk erect, before I began to speak, con-
ceived I might be a piece of clockwork (which is in that coun-
try arrived to a very great perfection) contrived by some inge-
nious artist. But when he heard my voice, and found what I
delivered to be regular and rational, he could not conceal his
astonishment. He was by no means satisfied with the relation
I gave him of the manner I came into his kingdom, but thought
it a story concerted between Glumdalclitch and her father, who
had taught me a set of words to make me sell at a better price.
Upon this imagination, he put several other questions to me,
and still received rational answers, no otherwise defective than
by a foreign accent, and an imperfect knowledge in the lan-
guage, with some rustic phrases which I had learned at the
farmer's house, and did not suit the polite style of a court.
His Majesty sent for three great scholars, who were then
in the weekly waiting, according to the custom of that country.
These gentlemen, after they had awhile examined my shape.
with much nicety, were of different opinions concerning me.
They all agreed that I could not be produced according to the
regular laws of nature, because I was not framed with a capacity
of preserving my life, either by swiftness, or climbing of trees, or
digging holes in the earth. They observed by my teeth, which
143
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
they viewed with great exactness, that I was a carnivorous ani-
mál; yet most quadrupeds being an overmatch for me, and field
mice, with some others, too nimble, they could not imagine how
I should be able to support myself, unless I fed upon snails and
other insects; which they offered, by many learned arguments,*
to evince that I could not possibly do. One of these virtuosi
seemed to think that I might be an embryo, or abortive birth.
But this opinion was rejected by the other two, who observed my
limbs to be perfect and finished, and that I had lived several
years, as it was manifest from my beard, the stumps whereof they
plainly discovered through a magnifying-glass. They would not
allow me to be a dwarf, because my littleness was beyond all de
grees of comparison; for the queen's favorite dwarf, the smallest
ever known in that kingdom, was nearly thirty feet high. After
much debate,they concluded unanimously, that I was only relplum
scalclath, which is interpreted literally lusus nature; a determi-
nation exactly agreeable to the modern philosophy of Europe,
whose professors, disdaining the old evasion of occult causes,
whereby the followers of Aristotle endeavored in vain to disguise
their ignorance, have invented this wonderful solution of all
difficulties, to the unspeakable advancement of human knowl-
edge.
After this decisive conclusion, I entreated to be heard a
word or two. I applied myself to the king, and assured his
majesty, “that I came from a country which abounded with
several millions of both sexes, and of my own stature; where
the animals, trees, and houses, were all in proportion, and where,
by consequence, I might be as able to defend myself, and to
find sustenance, as any of his majesty's subjects could do here
which I took for a full answer to those gentlemen's arguments.
To this they only replied with a smile of contempt, saying,
"that the farmer had instructed me very well in my lesson." †
t
The king, who had a much better understanding, dismissed his
learned men, sent for the farmer, who by good fortune was not
yet gone out of town. Having, therefore, first examined him
privately, and then confronted him with me and the young girl,
>>
*By this reasoning the author probably intended to ridicule the pride of those philoso-
phers who have thought fit to arraign the wisdom of Providence in the creation and govern-
ment of the world; whose cavils are specious, like those of the Brobdingnagian sages, only
in proportion to the ignorance of those to whom they are proposed.-Hawkesworth.
†This satire is levelled against all who reject those facts for which they cannot perfectly
account, notwithstanding the absurdity of rejecting the testimony by which they are sup-
ported.-Hawkesworth.
Sir Walter Scott thinks that Swift has designedly introduced some traits of William
III.'s character in the sketch of the king of Brobdingnag; but if anything more than the
ideal of a patriot monarch is designed, it is probable that the Dean had an eye to the Prince.
of Wales, afterwards George II., from whom the Tories had formed favorable anticipations.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
149
his majesty began to think that what we told him might possi
bly be true. He desired the queen to order that a particular
care should be taken of me; and was of opinion that Glumdal-
clitch should still continue in her office of tending me, because
he observed we had a great affection for each other. A conve-
nient apartment was provided for her at court; she had a sort
of governess appointed to take care of her education, a maid
to dress her, and two other servants for menial offices; but the
care of me was wholly appropriated to herself. The queen
commanded her own cabinet-maker to contrive a box, that
might serve me as a bedchamber, after the model that Glum-
dalclitch and I should agree upon. This man was a most in-
genious artist, and according to my directions, in three weeks,
finished for me a wooden chamber of sixteen feet square, and
twelve high, with sash windows, a door, and two closets, like a
London bedchamber. The board that made the ceiling, was
to be lifted up and down by two hinges, to put in a bed ready
furnished by her majesty's upholsterer, which Glumdalclitch
took out every day to air, made it with her own hands, and
letting it down at night, locked up the roof over me. A nice.
workman, who was famous for little curiosities, undertook to
make me two chairs, with backs and frames, of a substance not
unlike ivory, and two tables, with a cabinet-to put my things
in. The room was quilted on all sides, as well as the floor and
the ceiling, to prevent any accident from the carelessness of
those who carried me, and to break the force of a jolt, when I
went in a coach. I desired a lock for my door, to prevent rats
and mice from coming in. The smith, after several attempts,
made the smallest that ever was seen among them, for I have
known a larger at the gate of a gentleman's house in England.
I made a shift to keep the key in a pocket of my own, fearing
Glumdalclitch might lose it. The queen likewise ordered the
thinnest silks that could be gotten, to make me clothes, not
much thicker than an English blanket, very cumbersome till I
was accustomed to them. They were after the fashion of the
kingdom, partly resembling the Persian, and partly the Chinese, »
and are a very grave and decent habit.
The queen became so fond of my company, that she could
not dine without me. I had a table placed upon the same at
which her majesty ate, just at her elbow, and a chair to sit on.
Glumdalclitch stood on a stool on the floor near my table, to
assist and take care of me. I had an entire set of silver dishes
*Swift's frequent references to proportions, both here and in the Voyage to Lilliput
give an air of probability to his story which none of his imitators have been able to attain.
150
GULLIVER'S, TRAVELS.
and plates, and other necessaries which, in proportion to those
of the queen, were not much bigger than what I have seen in a
London toy-shop, for the furniture of a baby-house: these my
little nurse kept in her pocket in a silver box, and gave me at
meals as I wanted them, always cleaning them herself. No
person dined with the queen but the two princesses royal, the
elder sixteen years old, and the younger at that time thirteen
and a month. Her majesty used to put a bit of meat upon one
of my dishes, out of which I carved for myself, and her diver-
sion was to see me eat in miniature; for the queen (who had
indeed but a weak stomach) took up, at one mouthful, as much
as a dozen English farmers could eat at a meal, which to me was
for some time a very nauseous sight. She would craunch the
wing of a lark, bones and all, between her teeth, although 1
were nine times as large as that of a full-grown turkey; and put
a bit of bread in her mouth, as big as two twelvepenny loaves.
She drank out of a golden cup, above a hogshead at a draught.
Her knives were twice as long as a scythe, set straight upon a
handle. The spoons, forks, and other instruments, were all in
the same proportion. I remember when Glumdalclitch carried
me, out of curiosity, to see some of the tables at court, where
ten or a dozen of those enormous knives and forks were lifted
up together, I thought I had never till then beheld so terrible
a sight.
It is the custom, that every Wednesday (which, as I have
observed, is their Sabbath), the king and queen, with the royal
issue of both sexes, dine together in the apartment of his
majesty, to whom I was now become a great favorite; and at
these times, my little chair and table were placed at his left
hand, before one of the salt-cellars. This prince took a pleas-
ure in conversing with me, inquiring into the manners, religion,
laws, government, and learning of Europe, wherein I gave him
the best account I was able. His apprehension was so clear,
and his judgment so exact, that he made very wise reflections
and observations upon all I said. But I confess, that after I
had been a little too copious in talking of my own beloved
country, of our trade and wars by sea and land, of our schisms
in religion, and parties in the state, the prejudices of his educa-
tion prevailed so far, that he could not forbear taking me up in
his right hand, and stroking me gently with the other, after a
hearty fit of laughing, asked me, whether I was a Whig or Tory?
Then turning to his first minister, who waited behind him with
a white staff, near as tall as the mainmast of the Roval Sover-
eign, he observed, "how contemptible a thing was human
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
151
grandeur, which could be mimicked by such diminutive insects
as I; and yet," says he, "I dare engage these creatures have
their titles and distinctions of honor; they contrive little nests
and burrows, that they call houses and cities; they make a
figure and dress in equipage; they love, they fight, they dis-
pute, they cheat, they betray." And thus he continued on,
while my color came and went several times, with indignation,
to hear our noble country, the mistress of arts and arms, the
scourge of France, the arbitress of Europe, the seat of virtue,
piety, honor, and truth, the pride and envy of the world, so
contemptuously treated.*
But as I was not in a condition to resent injuries, so upon
mature thoughts I began to doubt whether I was injured or
no.† For, after having been accustomed several months to
the sight and converse of this people, and observed every
object upon which I cast mine eyes to be of proportionable
magnitude, the horror I had at first conceived from-their bulk
and aspect was so far worn off, that if I had then beheld a
company of English lords and ladies in their finery and birth-
day clothes, acting their several parts in the most courtly man-
ner of strutting, and bowing, and prating; to say the truth, I
should have been strongly tempted to laugh as much at them
as the king and his grandees did at me. Neither, indeed,
could I forbear smiling at myself, when the queen used to
place me upon her hand towards a looking-glass, by which both
our persons appeared before me in full view together; and
there could be nothing more ridiculous than the comparison ;
so that I really began to imagine myself dwindled many de-
grees below my usual size.
Nothing angered and mortified me so much as the queen's
dwarf; who, being of the lowest stature that was ever in that
country (for I verily think he was not full thirty feet high),
became so insolent at seeing a creature so much beneath him,
that he would always affect to swagger and look big as he
passed by me in the queen's ante-chamber, while I was stand-
ing on some table talking with the lords or ladies of the court,
and he seldom failed of a smart word or two upon my little-
ness; against which I could only revenge myself by calling
These boasts, which have been the commonplaces of party during the last two centuries,
are rendered supremely ridiculous by their contrast with the speech of the king of Brob
dingnag.
21
Whether I was injured or no. 39 This vulgar and ungrammatical mode of expression
has become almost universal: but instead of "no
the particle "not" should be used.
The absurdity of the former will appear by only repeating the word to which it refers, and
annexing to it, as thus-"whether I were injured, or no injured," whereas, "whether I
were injured or not injured," is good grammar.—Sheridan.
152
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
him brother, challenging him to wrestle, and such repartees as
are usually in the mouths of court pages. One day at dinner,
this malicious little cub was so nettled with something I had
said to him, that, raising himself upon the frame of her majesty's
chair, he took me up by the middle, as I was sitting down, not
thinking any harm, and let me drop into a large silver bowl of
cream, and then ran away as fast as he could. I fell over head
and ears, and if I had not been a good swimmer it might have
gone very hard with me; for Glumdalclitch in that instant
happened to be at the other end of the room, and the queen
was in such a fright that she wanted presence of mind to assist
me. But my little nurse ran to my relief, and took me out,
after I had swallowed above a quart of cream. I was put to
bed; however I received no other damage than the loss of a
suit of clothes, which was utterly spoiled. The dwarf was
soundly whipped, and as a farther punishment, forced to drink
up the bowl of cream into which he had thrown me: neither
was he ever restored to favor; for soon after the queen be-
stowed him on a lady of high quality, so that I saw him no
more, to my very great satisfaction: for I could not tell to
what extremity such a malicious urchin might have carried his
resentment.
He had before served me a scurvy trick, which set the
queen a-laughing, although at the same time she was heartily
vexed, and would have immediately cashiered him, if I had not
been so generous as to intercede. Her majesty had taken a
marrow-bone upon her plate, and, after knocking out the mar-
row, placed the bone again on the dish erect, as it stood before;
the dwarf, watching his opportunity, while Glumdalclitch was
gone to the sideboard, mounted the stool that she stood on to
take care of me at meals, took me up in both hands, and
squeezing my legs together, wedged them into the marrow-
bone above my waist, where I stuck for some time, and made
a very ridiculous figure. I believe it was near a minute before
any one knew what was become of me; for I thought it below
me to cry out. But, as princes seldom get their meat hot, my
legs were not scalded, only my stockings and breeches in a
sad condition. The dwarf, at my entreaty, had no other pun-
ishment than a sound whipping.
I was frequently rallied by the queen upon account of my
fearfulness; and she used to ask me whether the people of my
country were as great cowards as myself! The occasion was.
this: the kingdom is much pestered with flies in the summer;
and these odious insects, each of them as big as a Dunstable
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
J53
lark, hardly gave me any rest while I sat at dinner, with their
continual humming and buzzing about mine ears. They would
sometimes alight upon my victuals, and leave their loathsome
excrement or spawn behind, which to me was very visible,
though not to the natives of that country, whose larger optics
were not so acute as mine in viewing smaller objects. Some-
times they would fix upon my nose or forehead, where they
stung me to the quick, smelling very offensively; and I could
easily trace that viscous matter, which, our naturalists tell us,
enables those creatures to walk with their feet upwards upon
a ceiling. I had much ado to defend myself against these
detestable animals, and could not forbear starting when they
came on my face. It was the common practice of the dwarf,
to catch a number of these insects in his hand, as schoolboys
do among us, and let them out suddenly under my nose, on
purpose to frighten me, and divert the queen. My remedy was
to cut them in pieces with my knife, as they flew in the air,
wherein my dexterity was much admired.
I remember, one morning, when Glumdalclitch had set me
in a box upon a window, as she usually did in fair days to give
me air (for I durst not venture to let the box be hung on a
nail out of the window, as we do with cages in England), after
I had lifted up one of my sashes, and sat down at my table to
eat a piece of sweet cake for my breakfast, above twenty wasps,
allured by the smell, came flying into the room, humming
louder than the drones of as many bagpipes. Some of them
seized my cake, and carried it piecemeal away; others flew
about my head and face, confounding me with the noise, and
putting me in the utmost terror of their stings. However, I
had the courage to rise and draw my hanger, and attack them
in the air. I dispatched four of them, but the rest got away,
and I presently shut my window. These insects were as large
as partridges: I took out their stings, found them an inch and
a half long, and as sharp as needles. I carefully preserved
them all; and having since shown them, with some other
curiosities, in several parts of Europe; upon my return to
England I gave three of them to Gresham College and kept
the fourth for myself.
154
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
CHAPTER IV.
A
COUNTRY DESCRIBED
PROPOSAL FOR CORRECTING
MODERN MAPS—THE KING'S PALACE, AND SOME ACCOUNT
OF THE METROPOLIS—THE AUTHOR'S WAY OF TRAVELLING
THE CHIEF TEMPLE DESCRIBED.
THE
medg
JOURNEYS with Glumdalclitch having given me some knowl-
edge of the country, I now intend to give the reader a short
description of it, as far as I travelled, which was not above
two thousand miles round Lorbrulgrud, the metropolis. For
the queen, whom I always attended, never went farther when
she accompanied the king in his progresses, and there stayed
till his majesty returned from viewing his frontiers. The whole
extent of this prince's dominions reaches about six thousand
miles in length, and from three to five in breadth; whence I
cannot but conclude that our geographers of Europe are in a
great error, by supposing nothing but sea between Japan and
California; for it was ever my opinion, that there must be a
balance of earth to counterpoise the great continent of Tartary ;
and therefore they ought to correct their maps and charts, by
joining this vast tract of land to the north-west parts of America,
wherein I shall be ready to lend them my assistance.
The kingdom is a peninsula, terminated to the north-east
by a ridge of mountains thirty miles high, which are altogether
impassable, by reason of the volcanoes upon the tops; neither
do the most learned know what sort of mortals inhabit beyond
those mountains, or whether they be inhabited at all. On the
three other sides, it is bounded by the ocean. There is not
one seaport in the whole kingdom; and those parts of the
coasts into which the rivers issue, are so full of pointed rocks,
and the sea generally so rough, that there is no venturing with
the smallest of their boats; so that these people are wholly ex-
cluded from any commerce with the rest of the world.*
But
* This description of a sea that could not be safely navigated, appears to have been
taken from that veracious traveller, Sir J. Mandeville. "From the land of Bactry, men
go many days' journey to the land of Prester John, that is a great emperor of Inde; and
men call his land the yle of Pantoxore.
There are many places in the sea where
are many rockes of a stone that is called adamand, the which of his own kind draweth all
manner of yron, and therefore there may be no ships that hath yron nayles pass but it
drawoth them to him, and therefore they dare not go into that country with ships for fear of
adamand. I went once into that sea, and saw along it as it had been a great yle of trees,
stockes and branches growinge, and the shipmen told me that those were of greate shippes
that abode there through the vertue of the adamandes, and of things that were in the
shippes, whereof those trees sprung and waxed."
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
155
the large rivers are full of vessels, and abound with excellent
fish; for they seldom get an from the sea, because the sea-
fish are of the same size with those in Europe, and conse-
quently, not worth catching whereby it is manifest, that na-
ture, in the production of plants and anils of so extraordinary
a bulk, is wholly confined to this cohent, of which I leave
the reasons to be determine
philosophers. However, now
and then they take a whalet happs to be dashed against
the rocks, which the common people ed on heartily. These
whales I have known so large that han could hardly carry
one upon his shoulders; and somemes, for curiosity, they are
brought in hampers to Lorbrulgrud; I saw one of them in a
dish at the king's table, which passed for a rarity, but I did not
observe he was fond of it; for I think, indeed, the bigness
disgusted him, although I have seen one somewhat larger in
Greenland.

The country is well inhabited, for it contains fifty-one cities,
near a hundred walled towns, and a great number of villages.
To satisfy my curious reader, it may be sufficient to describe
Lorbrulgrud. This city stands upon almost two equal parts,
on each side of the river that passes through. It contains
above eighty thousand houses, and about six hundred thou-
sand inhabitants. It is in length three glomglungs (which
makes about fifty-four English miles), and two and a half in
breadth; as I measured it myself in the royal map made by
the king's order, which was laid on the ground on purpose for
me, and extended a hundred feet; I paced the diameter and
circumference several times barefoot, and computing by the
scale, measured it pretty exactly.
The king's palace is no regular edifice, but a heap of build-
ing about seven miles round: the chief rooms are generally
two hundred and forty feet high, and broad and long in propor-
tion. A coach was allowed to Glumdalclitch and me, wherein
her governess frequently took her out to see the town, or go
among the shops; and I was always of the party, carried in my
box; although the girl, at my own desire, would often take me
out, and hold me in her hand, that I might more conveniently
view the houses and the people, as we passed along the streets.
I reckoned our coach to be about a square of Westminster
Hall, but not altogether so high; however, I cannot be very
exact. One day the governess ordered our coachman to stop
at several shops, where the beggars, watching their opportunity,
crowded to the sides of the coach, and gave me the most horri
bie spectacle that ever a European eye beheld. There was a
156
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
woman with a cancer in her breast, swelled to a monstrous
size, full of holes, in two or three of which I could have easily
crept, and covered my whole body. There was a fellow with
a wen in his neck, larger than five wool-packs; and another
with a couple of wooden legs, each about twenty feet high.
But the most hateful sight of all was the lice crawling on their
clothes. I could see distinctly the limbs of these vermin with
my naked eye, much better than those of a European louse
through a microscope, and their snouts with which they rooted
like swine. They were the first I had ever beheld, and I should
have been curious enough to dissect one of them, if I had had
proper instruments, which I unluckily left behind me in the
ship, although, indeed, the sight was so nauseous, that it per-
fectly turned my stomach.
Beside the large box in which I was usually carried, the
queen ordered a smaller one to be made for me, of about
twelve feet square, and ten high, for the convenience of travel-
ling; because the other was somewhat too large for Glumdal-
clitch's lap, and cumbersome in the coach: it was made by the
same artist, whom I directed in the whole contrivance. This
travelling closet was an exact square, with a window in the
middle of three of the squares, and each window was latticed
with iron wire on the outside. to prevent accidents in long
journeys. On the fourth side, which had no window, two
strong staples were fixed, through which the person that car-
ried me, when I had a mind to be on horseback, put a leather
belt, and buckled it about his waist. This was always the
office of some grave trusty servant, in whom I could confide,
whether I attended the king and queen in their progresses, or
were disposed to see the gardens, or pay a visit to some
great lady or-minister of state in the court, when Glumdalclitch
happened to be out of order; for I soon began to be known
and esteemed among the greatest officers, I suppose more upon
account of their majesties' favor, than any merit of my own.
In journeys, when I was weary of the coach, a servant on horse-
back would buckle on my box, and place it upon a cushion be-
fore him; and there I had a full prospect of the country on
three sides from my three windows. I had in this closet a field-
bed, and a hammock hung from the ceiling, two chairs and a
table, neatly screwed to the floor, to prevent being tossed
by the agitation of the horse or the coach. And having been
long used to sea voyages, those motions, although sometimes
very violent, did not much discompose me.
T
Whenever I had a mind to see the town, it was always in
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
157
my travelling closet: which Glumdalclitch held in her lap in a
kind of open sedan, after the fashion of the country, borne by
four men, and attended by two others in the queen's livery.
The people, who had often heard of me, were very curious to
crowd about the sedan, and the girl was complaisant enough
to make the bearers stop, and to take me in her hand that I
might be more conveniently seen.
I was very desirous to see the chief temple, and particularly
the tower belonging to it, which is reckoned the highest in the
kingdom. Accordingly, one day my nurse carried me thither,
but I may truly say I came back disappointed; for the height
is not above three thousand feet, reckoning from the ground to
the highest pinnacle top; which, allowing for the difference
between the size of those people and us in Europe, is no great
matter for admiration, nor at all equal in proportion (if I rightly
remember) to Salisbury steeple. But, not to detract from a
nation, to which, during my life, I shall acknowledge myself
extremely obliged, it must be allowed, that whatever this famous
tower wants in height, is amply made up in beauty and strength;
for the walls are near a hundred feet thick, built of hewn stone,
whereof each is about forty feet square, and adorned on all
sides with statues of gods and emperors, cut in marble, larger
than the life, placed in their several niches. I measured a little
finger which had fallen down from one of these statutes, and
lay unperceived among some rubbish, and found it exactly four
feet and an inch in length.* Glumdalclitch wrapped it up in
her handkerchief, and carried it home in her pocket, to keep
among other trinkets, of which the girl was very fond, as chil-
dren at her age usually are.
The king's kitchen is, indeed, a noble building, vaulted at
top, and about six hundred feet high. The great oven is not
so wide, by ten paces, as the cupola at St. Paul's; for I meas-
ured the latter on purpose, after my return. But if I should
describe the kitchen grate, the prodigious pots and kettles, the
joints of meat turning on the spits, with many other particulars,
perhaps I should be hardly believed; at least a severe critic
would be apt to think I enlarged a little, as travellers are often
*Had Swift seen the colossal statuary of ancient Egypt, he would have found that it
rivalled the imaginary sculpture of Brobdingnag. Belzoni has given the exact dimensions
of the four stupendous figures which are seated side by side in front of the excavated temple
of Ipsambul; each of them, though seated, measures sixty-four feet from the ground to the
top of the cap, the arm, from the shoulder to the elbow, measures fifteen feet and a half,
the ear three feet and a half, and the chest, across the shoulders, twenty-five feet four
inches. Yet the great Sphinx is half as large again as these. Among the Egyptian anti-
quities there is a colossal fist, probably belonging to a sphinx: were the hand opened, the
fingers would be nearly of the size of that which Glumdalclitch is said to have picked up.
158
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
suspected to do. To avoid which censure, I fear I have run
too much into the other extreme, and that if this treatise should
happen to be translated into the language of Brobdingnag
(which is the general name of that kingdom), and transmitted
thither, the king and his people would have reason to complain
that I had done them an injury by a false and diminutive rep-
resentation.*
His majesty seldom keeps above six hundred horses in his
stables; they are generally from fifty-four to sixty feet high.
But when he goes abroad on solemn days, he is attended, for
state, by a militia guard of five hundred horse, which, indeed, I
thought was the most splendid sight that could be ever beheld,
till I saw part of his army in battalia, whereof I shall find an-
other occasion to speak.
-
IN NAVIGATION.
CHAPTER V.
SEVERAL ADVENTURES THAT HAPPENED TO THE AUTHOR-THE
EXECUTION OF A CRIMINAL-THE AUTHOR SHOWS HIS SKILL
JUSTLY may I say, that I should have lived happy enough
in the country, if my littleness had not exposed me to several
ridiculous and troublesome accidents; some of which I shall
venture to relate. Glumdalclitch often carried me into the
gardens of the court in my smaller box, and would sometimes.
take me out of it, and hold me in her hand, or set me down to
walk. I remember, before the dwarf left the queen, he fol-
lowed us one day into those gardens, and my nurse having set
me down, he and I being close together, near some dwarf ap-
ple-trees, I must need show my wit, by a silly allusion between
him and the trees, which happens to hold in their language as
it does in ours. Whereupon, the malicious rogue, watching
his opportunity, when I was walking under one of them, shook
it directly over my head, by which a dozen apples, each of
Lord Orrery has directed attention to the air of probability which Swift's minute atten-
to proportions, and his reference to familiar objects as a standard, give to his account
Lilliput. The same tact is not less observable in the account of Brobdingnag, and partic
larly in the comparison of the royal kitchen with the cupola of St. Paul's; perhaps also
Swift intended to hint that St. Paul's, however splendid as an edifice, does not, like the
Gothic cathedrals, immediately suggest that it was erected for religious purposes.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
159
them near as large as a Bristol barrel, came tumbling about
my ears; one of them hit me on the back as I chanced to
stoop, and knocked me down flat on my face; but I received
no other hurt, and the dwarf was pardoned at my desire, be-
cause I had given the provocation.
Another day, Glumdalclitch left me on a smooth grass-
plot to divert myself, while she walked at some distance with
her governess. In the mean time, there suddenly fell such a
violent shower of hail, that I was immediately, by the force of
it, struck to the ground; and when I was down, the hailstones
gave me such cruel bangs all over the body, as if I had been
pelted with tennis-balls: however, I made a shift to creep on
all fours, and shelter myself, by lying flat on my face, on the
lee-side of a border of lemon-thyme; but so bruised from head
to foot, that I could not go abroad in ten days. Neither is that
at all to be wondered at, because nature, in that country, observ-
ing the same proportion through all her operations, a hailstone
is near eighteen hundred times as large as one in Europe; which
I can assert upon experience, having been so curious* to weigh
and measure them.
But a more dangerous accident happened to me in the same
garden, when my little nurse, believing she had put me in a
secure place (which I often entreated her to do, that I might
enjoy my own thoughts), and having left my box at home, to
avoid the trouble of carrying it, went to another part of the
garden with her governess and some ladies of her acquaintance.
While she was absent, and out of hearing, a small white spaniel
that belonged to one of the chief gardeners, having got by
accident into the garden, happened to range near the place
where I lay the dog, following the scent, came directly up, and
taking me in his mouth, ran straight to his master wagging his
tail, and set me gently on the ground. By good fortune he had
been so well taught, that I was carried between his teeth with-
out the least hurt, or even tearing my clothes. But the poor
gardener, who knew me well, and had a great kindness for me,
was in a terrible fright; he gently took me up in both his hands,
and asked me how I did; but I was so amazed and out of
breath, that I could not speak a word. In a few minutes I
came to myself, and he carried me safe to my little nurse, who,
by this time, had returned to the place where she left me, and
was in cruel agonies when I did not appear, nor answer when
she called. She severely reprimanded the gardener on account
The particle "as," is here improperly omitted; it should be, so curious "
weight, etc.-Sheridan,
>>
88
tq
150
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
of his dog. But the thing was hushed up, and never known at
court, for the girl was afraid of the queen's anger; and truly, as
to myself, I thought it would not be for my reputation that such
a story should go about.
This accident absolutely determined. Glumdalclitch never to
trust me abroad for the future out of her sight. I had been
long afraid of this resolution, and therefore concealed from her
some little unlucky adventures, that happened in those times
when I was left by myself. Once a kite, hovering over the
garden, made a stoop at me, and if I had not resolutely drawn
my hanger, and run under a thick espalier, he would have
certainly carried me away in his talons. Another time, walk-
ing to the top of a fresh molehill, I fell to my neck in the hole,
through which that animal had cast up the earth, and coined
some lie, not worth remembering, to excuse myself for spoiling
my clothes. I likewise broke my right shin against the shell
of a snail, which I happened to stumble over, as I was walking
alone and thinking of poor England.
I cannot tell whether I were more pleased or mortified to
observe, in those solitary walks, that the smaller birds did not
appear to be at all afraid of me, but would hop about within a
yard's distance, looking for worms and other food, with as much
indifference and security as if no creature at all were near them.
I remember, a thrush had the confidence to snatch out of my
hand, with his bill, a piece of cake that Glumdalclitch had just
given me for my breakfast. When I attempted to catch any of
these birds, they would boldly turn against me, endeavoring to
peck my fingers, which I durst not venture within their reach;
and then they would hop back unconcerned, to hunt for worms.
or snails, as they did before. But one day, I took a thick
cudgel, and threw it with all my strength so luckily, at a linnet,
that I knocked him down, and seizing him by the neck with
both my hands, ran with him in triumph to my nurse. How-
ever, the bird, who had only been stunned, recovering himself,
gave me so many boxes with his wings, on both sides of my
head and body, though I held him at arm's length, and was out
of the reach of his claws, that I was twenty times thinking to
let him go. But I was soon relieved by one of our servants,
who wrung off the bird's neck, and I had him next day for
dinner, by the queen's command. This linnet, as near as I can
remember, seemed to be somewhat larger than an English
swari.
The maids of honor often invited Glumdaiclitch to their
apartments, and desired she would bring me along with her, on
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
161
purpose to have the pleasure of seeing and touching me.
They would often strip me naked from top to toe, and lay me
at full length in their bosoms, wherewith I was much aisgusted;
because, to say the truth, a very offensive smell came from their
skins; which I do not mention or intend to the disadvantages
of those excellent ladies, for whom I have all manner of respect;
but I conceive that my sense was more acute in proportion to
my littleness, and that those illustrious persons were no more
disagreeable to their lovers, or to each other, than people of
the same quality are with us in England. And after all, I
found their natural smell was much more supportable than
when they used perfumes, under which I immediately swooned.
away. I cannot forget, that an intimate friend of mine in
Lilliput took the freedom in a warn day, when I had used a
good deal of exercise, to complain of a strong smell about me,
although I am as little faulty that way as most of my sex; but
I suppose his faculty of smelling was as nice with regard to me,
as mine was to that of this people. Upon this point, I cannot
forbear doing justice to the queen my mistress, and Glumdal-
clitch my nurse, whose persons were as sweet as those of any
lady in England.
That which gave me most uneasiness among these maids of
honor (when my nurse carried me to visit them) was, to see
them use me without any manner of ceremony, like a creature
who had no sort of concupiscence: for they would strip them-
selves to the skin, and put their smocks on in my presence,
while I was placed on their toilet, directly before their naked
bodies, which I am sure to me was very far from being a tempt-
ing sight, or from giving me any other emotions than those of
horror and disgust; their skins appeared so coarse and uneven,
so variously colored, when I saw them near, with a mole here
and there as broad as a trencher, and hairs hanging from it
thicker than packthreads, to say nothing farther concerning the
rest of their persons. Neither did they at all scruple, while I
was by, to discharge what they had drank, to the quantity of at
least two hogsheads, in a vessel that held above three tuns.
The handsomest among these maids of honor, a pleasant frolic-
some girl of sixteen, would sometimes set me astride upon one
of her nipples, with many other tricks, wherein the reader will
*Swift attributed his disappointment in his hopes of obtaining a bishopric from Queen
Anne to the united influence of female intrigues and the remonstrances of Archbishop
Sharpe. The Duchess of Somerset is said to have besought the Queen on her knees not
to grant him promotion, in revenge for a bitter lampoon, in which the character of the
duchess was very roughly handled. Coarse as is the description here given of the maids of
honor in the court of Brobdingnag, there is reason to believe that it has been much softened
down from the original sketch.
i62
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
excuse me for not being over particular. But I was so much
displeased, that I entreated Glumdalclitch to contrive some
excuse for not seeing that young lady any more.
One day, a young gentleman, who was nephew to my nurse's
governess, came and pressed them both to see an execution.
It was of a man, who had murdered one of that gentleman's in
timate acquaintance. Glumdalclitch was prevailed on to be of
the company, very much against her inclination, for she was
naturally tender-hearted; and as for myself, although I abhorred
such kind of spectacles, yet my curiosity tempted me to see
something that I thought must be extraordinary. The male-
factor was fixed on a chair upon a scaffold erected for that
purpose, and his head cut off at one blow, with a sword of
about forty feet long. The veins and arteries spouted up such
a prodigious quantity of blood, and so high in the air, that the
great jet d'eau at Versailles was not equal* for the time it lasted;
and the head, when it fell on the scaffold floor, gave such a
bounce as made me start, although I were at least half an Eng
lish mile distant.
The queen, who often used to hear me talk of my sea-
voyages, and took all occasions to divert me when I was me
ancholy, asked me whether I understood how to handle a sail
or an oar, and whether a little exercise of rowing might not be
convenient for my health? I answered that I understood both
very well for although my proper employment had been to be
surgeon or doctor to the ship, yet often, upon a pinch, I was
forced to work like a common mariner. But I could not see
how this could be done in their country, where the smallest
wherry was equal to a first-rate man-of-war among us; and such
a boat as I could manage would never live in one of their
rivers. Her majesty said, “If I would contrive a boat, her
own joiner should make it, and she would provide a place for
me to sail in." The fellow was an ingenious workman, and by
my instructions, in ten days, finished a pleasure-boat, with all
its tackling, able conveniently to hold eight Europeans. When
it was finished, the queen was so delighted that she ran with it.
in her lap to the king, who ordered it to be put into a cistern
full of water, with me in it, by way of trial; where I could not
manage my two sculls, or little oars, for want of room. But the
queen had before contrived another project. She ordered the
joiner to make a wooden trough of three hundred feet long,
fifty broad, and eight deep; which being well pitched to prevent
leaking, was placed on the floor along the wall, in an outer
✦ It should be—“ was not equal to it, etc-Sheridan,
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
163
room of the palace. It had a cock near the bottom to let out
the water, when it began to grow stale; and two servants could
easily fill it in half an hour. Here I often used to row for my
own diversion, as well as that of the queen and her ladies, who
thought themselves well entertained with my skill and agility.
Sometimes I would put up my sail and then my business was
only to steer, while the ladies gave me a gale with their fans;
and when they were weary, some of their pages would blow my
sail forward with their breath, while I showed my art by steer-
ing starboard or larboard as I pleased. When I had done,
Glumdalclitch always carried back my boat into her closet,
and hung it on a nail to dry.
In this exercise I once met an accident, which had like to
have cost me my life; for, one of the pages having put my
boat into the trough, the governess who attended Glumdalclitch
very officiously lifted me up, to place me in the boat; but I
happened to slip through her fingers, and should infallibly have
fallen down forty feet, upon the floor, if, by the luckiest chance
in the world, I had not been stopped by a corking-pin that
stuck in the good gentlewoman's stomacher; the head of the
pin passed between my shirt and the waistband of my breeches,
and thus I was held by the middle in the air, till Glumdalclitch
ran to my relief.
Another time, one of the servants, whose office it was to fill
my trough every third day with fresh water, was so careless * to
let a huge frog (not perceiving it) slip out of his pail. The
frog lay concealed till I was put into my boat, but then, seeing
a resting-place, climbed up, and made it to lean so much on
one side, that I was forced to balance it with all my weight on
the other to prevent overturning. When the frog was got in,
it hopped at once half the length of the boat, and then over my
head, backward and forward, daubing my face and clothes with
its odious slime. The largeness of its features made it appear
the most deformed animal that can be conceived. However, I
desired Glumdalclitch to let me deal with it alone. I banged
it a good while with one of my sculls, and at last forced it to
leap out of the boat.
But the greatest danger I underwent in that kingdom was
from a monkey, who belonged to one of the clerks of the
kitchen. Glumdalclitch had locked me up in her closet, while
she went somewhere upon business, or a visit. The weather
being very warm, the closet window was left open, as well as the
windows and door of my bigger box, in which I usually lived,
It should be-" was so careless as to iet.”—Sheridan,
164
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
because of its largeness and conveniency. As I sat quietly
meditating at my table, I heard something bounce in at the
closet-window, and skip about from one side to the other;
whereat, although I was much alarmed, yet I ventured to look
out, but not stirring from my seat; and then I saw this frolic-
some animal frisking and leaping up and down, till at last he
came to my box, which he seemed to view with great pleasure
and curiosity, peeping in at the door and every window. I re-
treated to the farther corner of my room, or box; but the mon-
key, looking in at every side, put me into such a fright, that I
wanted presence of mind to conceal myself under the bed, as I
might easily have done. After some time spent in peeping,
grinning, and chattering, he at last espied me, and reaching
one of his paws in at the door, as a cat does when she plays
with a mouse, although I often shifted place to avoid him, he
at length seized the lappet of my coat (which being made of
that country silk, was very thick and strong), and dragged me
out. He took me up in his right forefoot, and held me as a
nurse does a child she is going to suckle, just as I have seen
the same sort of creature do with a kitten in Europe; and when
I offered to struggle, he squeezed me so hard, that I thought it
more prudent to submit. I have good reason to believe that
he took me for a young one of his own species, by his often
stroking my face very gently with his other paw. In these di-
versions he was interrupted by a noise at the closet door, as if
somebody were opening it; whereupon he suddenly leaped up
to the window, at which he had come in, and thence upon the
leads and gutters, walking upon three legs, and holding me in
the fourth, till he clambered up to a roof that was next to ours.
I heard Glumdalclitch give a shriek the moment he was carry-
ing me out. The poor girl was almost distracted; that quarter
of the palace was all in an uproar; the servants ran for lad-
ders; the monkey was seen by hundreds in the court, sitting
upon the ridge of a building, holding me like a baby in one of
his fore-paws, and feeding me with the other, by cramming into
my
mouth some victuals he had squeezed out of the bag on one
side of his chaps, and patting me when I would not eat; whereat
many of the rabble below could not forbear laughing; neither
do I think they justly ought to be blamed, for, without question,
the sight was ridiculous enough to everybody but myself. Some
of the people threw up stones, hoping to drive the monkey
down; but this was strictly forbidden, or else, very probably,
my brains had been dashed out.
The ladders were now applied, and mounted by several men:
*
K
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
105
which the monkey observing, and finding himself almost en-
compassed, not being able to make speed enough with his
three legs, let me drop on a ridge tile, and made his escape.
Here I sat for some time, five hundred yards from the ground,
expecting every moment to be blown down by the wind, or to
fall by my own giddiness, and come tumbling over and over
from the ridge to the eaves: but an honest lad, one of my nurse's
footmen, climbed up, and putting me into his breeches pocket,
brought me down safe.
I was almost choked with the filthy stuff the monkey had
crammed down my throat; but my dear little nurse picked it
out of my mouth with a small needle, and then I fell a-vomiting,
which gave me great relief. Yet I was so weak and bruised in
the sides with the squeezes given me by this odious animal,
that I was forced to keep my bed a fortnight. The king, queen,
and all the court, sent every day to inquire after my health :
d her majesty made me several visits during my sickness.
The monkey was killed, and an order made that no such animal
should be kept about the palace.
35
When I attended the king after my recovery, to return him
thanks for his favors, he was pleased to rally me a good deal
upon this adventure. He asked me, "what my thoughts and
speculations were while I lay in the monkey's paw? how I
liked the victuals he gave me? his manner of feeding? and
whether the fresh air on the roof had sharpened my stomach?
He desired to know "what I would have done upon such an
occasion in my own country?" I told his majesty," that in
Europe we had no monkeys except such as were brought for
curiosities from other places, and so small that I could deal
with a dozen of them together, if they presumed to attack me.
And as for that monstrous animal, with whom I was so lately
engaged (it was indeed as large as an elephant), if my fears
had suffered me to think so far as to make use of my hanger
(looking fiercely, and clapping my hand upon the hilt, as I
spoke) when he poked his paw into my chamber, perhaps I
should have given him such a wound, as would have made him
glad to withdraw it, with more haste than he put it in." This
I delivered in a firm tone, like a person who was jealous lest
his courage should be called in question. However, my speech
produced nothing else beside a loud laughter, which all the re-
spect due to his majesty from those about him could not make
them contain. This made me reflect, how vain an attempt it is
for a man to endeavor to do himself honor among those who are
out of all degree of equality or comparison with him. And yet
166
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
!
I have seen the moral of my own behavior very frequently in
England since my return; where a little contemptible varlet,
without the least title to birth, person, wit, or common sense,
shall presume to look with importance, and put himself upon a
foot with the greatest persons of the kingdom.
I was every day furnishing the court with some ridiculous
story; and Glumdalclitch, although she loved me to excess, yet
was arch enough to inform the queen, whenever I committed
any folly that she thought would be diverting to her majesty.
The girl, who had been out of order, was carried by her governess
to take the air about an hour's distance, or thirty miles from town.
They alighted out of the coach near a small foot-path in a field,
and Glumdalclitch setting down my travelling box, I went out
of it to walk. There was a cow-dung in the path, and I must
need try my activity by attempting to leap over it. I took a
run, but unfortunately jumped short, and found myself just in
the middle, up to my knees. I waded through with some diffi-
culty, and one of the footmen wiped me as clean as he could
with his handkerchief, for I was filthily bemired; and my nurse
confined me to my box, till we returned home; where the queen
was soon informed of what was passed, and the footmen spread
it about the court: so that all the mirth for some days was at
my expense.
CHAPTER VI.
SEVERAL CONTRIVANCES OF THE AUTHOR TO PLEASE THE KING
AND QUEEN-HE SHOWS HIS SKILL IN MUSIC-THE KING IN-
QUIRES INTO THE STATE OF ENGLAND, WHICH THE AUTHOR
RELATES TO HIM-THE KING'S OBSERVATIONS THEREON.
JOINED as I was to the court, I used to attend the king's
levee once or twice a week, and had often seen him under the
barber's hand, which indeed was at first very terrible to behold :
for the razor was almost twice as long as an ordinary scythe.
His majesty, according to the customs of the country, was only
shaved twice a week. I once prevailed on the barber to give
me some of the suds or lather, out of which I picked forty or
fifty of the strongest stumps of hair. I then took a piece of
fine wood, and cut it like the back of a comb, making several
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
167
holes in it at equal distances, with as small a needle as I could
get from Glumdalclitch. I fixed in the stumps so artificially,
scraping and sloping them with my knife towards the points,
that I made a very tolerable comb; which was a seasonable
supply, my own being so much broken in the teeth, that it was
almost useless: neither did I know any artist in that country
so nice and exact, as would undertake to make me another.
And this puts me in mind of an amusement, wherein I
spent many of my leisure hours. I desired the queen's woman
to save for me the combings of her majesty's hair, whereof in
time I got a good quantity; and consulting with my friend the
cabinet-maker, who had received general orders to do little jobs
for me, I directed him to make two chair frames, no larger than
those I had in my box, and to bore little holes with a fine awl
round those parts where I designed the backs and seats:
through these holes I wove the strongest hairs I could pick out,
just after the manner of cane chairs in England. When they
were finished, I made a present of them to her majesty, who
kept them in her cabinet, and used to show them for curiosities,
as indeed they were the wonder of every one that beheld them
The queen would have me sit upon one of these chairs, but
absolutely refused to obey her, protesting I would rather die a
thousand deaths, than place a dishonorable part of my body on
those precious hairs that once adorned her majesty's head. Ol
these hairs (as I had always a mechanical genius) I likewise
made a neat little purse, about five feet long, with her majesty's
name deciphered in gold letters, which I gave to Glumdalclitch
by the queen's consent. To say
the truth, it was more for show
than use, being not of strength to bear the weight of the larger
coins, and therefore she kept nothing in it but some little toys
that girls are fond of.
The king, who delighted in music, had frequent concerts at
court, to which I was sometimes carried, and set in my box on
the table to hear them; but the noise was so great that I could
hardly distinguish the tunes. I am confident that all the
drums and trumpets of a royal army, beating and sounding to-
gether just at your ears, could not equal it. My practice was
to have my box removed from the place where the performers
sat, as far as I could, then to shut the doors and windows of it,
and draw the window curtains, after which I found their music
not disagreeable.
I had learned in my youth to play a little upon the spinet.
Glumdalclitch kept one in her chamber, and a master attended
twice a week to teach her: I called it a spinet, because it somę:
168
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
what resembled that instrument, and was played upon in the
same manner. A fancy came into my head that I would enter-
tain the king and queen with an English tune upon this in-
strument. But this appeared extremely difficult; for the
spinet was near sixty feet long, each key being almost a foot
wide, so that with my arms extended I could not reach to above
five keys, and to press them down required a good smart stroke
with my fist, which would be too great a labor and to no pur-
pose. The method I contrived was this: I prepared two round
sticks about the bigness of common cudgels; they were thicker
at one end than the other, and I covered the thicker ends with
pieces of a mouse's skin, that by rapping on them I might
neither damage the tops of the keys nor interrupt the sound.
Before the spinet a bench was placed, about four feet below the
keys, and I was put upon the bench. I ran sidelong upon it,
that way and this, as fast as I could, banging the proper keys
with my two sticks, and made a shift to play a jig, to the great
satisfaction of both their majesties; but it was the most violent
exercise I ever underwent ; and yet I could not strike above
sixteen keys, nor, consequently, play the bass and treble to
gether, as other artists do'; which was a great disadvantage to
my performance.
4.
The king, who, as I before observed, was a prince of excel·
lent understanding, would frequently order that I should be
brought in my box, and set upon the table in his closet: he
would then command me to bring one of my chairs out of the
box, and sit down within three yards' distance, upon the top
of the cabinet, which brought me almost to a level with his
face. In this manner I had several conversations with him. I
one day took the freedom to tell his majesty, "that the con-
tempt he discovered towards Europe, and the rest of the world,
did not seem answerable to those excellent qualities of mind
that he was master of; that reason did not extend itself with
the bulk of the body; on the contrary, we observed in our
country, that the tallest persons were usually the least provided
with it; that among other animals, bees and ants had the rep-
utation of more industry, art, and sagacity than many of the
larger kinds; and that, as inconsiderable as he took me to be,
I hoped I might live to do his majesty some signal service."
The king heard me with attention, and began to conceive a
much better opinion of me than he had ever before. He de-
sired “I would give him as exact an accourt of the government
of England as I possibly could; because, as fond as princes
commonly are of their own customs (for so he conjectured of
GULLIVER's TRAVELS.
169
other monarchs by my former discourse), he should be glad to
hear of anything that might deserve imitation."
Imagine with thyself, courteous reader, how often I then
wished for the tongue of Demosthenes or Cicer, that might
have enabled me to celebrate the praise of my own dear native
country, in a style equal to its merits and felicity.
I began my discourse by informing his majesty, that our
dominions consisted of two islands, which composed three mighty
kingdoms, under one sovereign, besides our plantations in
America. I dwelt long upon the fertility of our soil, and the
temperature of our climate. I then spoke at large upon the
constitution of an English Parliament; partly made up of an
illustrious body, called the House of Peers; persons of the
noblest blood, and of the most ancient and ample patrimonies.
I described that extraordinary care always taken of their edu-
cation in art and arms, to qualify them for being counsellors
both to the king and kingdom; to have a share in the legisla-
ture; to be members of the highest court of judicature, whence
there can be no appeal; and to be champions always ready for
the defence of their prince and country, by their valor, conduct,
and fidelity. That these were the ornament and bulwark of
the kingdom, worthy followers of their most renowned ancestors,
whose honor had been the reward of their virtue, from which
their posterity were never once known to degenerate. To these
were joined several holy persons, as part of that assembly,
under the title of bishops, whose peculiar business it is to take
care of religion, and of those who instruct the people therein.
These were searched and sought out through the whole nation,
by the prince and his wisest counsellors, among such of the
priesthood as were most deservedly distinguished by the sanc-
tity of their life, and the depth of their erudition; who were
indeed the spiritual fathers of the clergy and the people.*
The doctrines of passive obedience and non-resistance, so strenuously maintained by
many eminent English divines, rendered the Church an object of suspicion to the several
Whig cabinets, and ministerial patronage was exerted to weaken the political influence of
the Church by promoting persons not likely to maintain the claims of ecclesiastical power.
Not only Swift, but many others, complained that the Church was betrayed by the State,
and that the secular power was directly exerted to overthrow episcopal authority. Bishop
Warburton, in one of his letters, urges his complaint with his usual force, vulgarity, and
mannerism; the passage is also remarkable for a Brobdingnagian image worthy of Swift
himself. "You mention Noah's ark. I have really forgot what I said of it. But I sup-
pose I compared it to the Church, as many a grave divine has done before me. The rab
bins make the giant Gog or Magog contemporary with Noah, and convinced by his preach-
ing; so that he was disposed to take the benefit of the ark. But here lay the distress: it
by no means suited his dimensions. Therefore, as he could not enter in, he contented him
self to ride upon it astride. And though you must suppose, that in that stormy weather he
was more than half boots over, he kept his seat, and dismounted safely when the ark landed
on Mount Ararat. Image now to yourself this illustrious cavalier mounted on his hackney;
and see if it does not bring before you the Church estrid by some lumpish minister of state,
170
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
That the other part of the Parliament consisted of an as-
sembly, called the House of Commons, who were all principal
gentlemen, freely picked and culled out by the people them-
selves, for their great abilities and love of their country, to
represent the wisdom of the whole nation. And that these
two bodies made up the most august assembly in Europe, to
whom, in conjunction with the prince, the whole legislature is
committed.
I then descended to the courts of justice; over which the
judges, those venerable sages and interpreters of the law, pre-
sided, for determining the disputed rights and properties of
men, as well as for the punishment of vice and protection of
innocence. I mentioned the prudent management of our treas-
ury; the valor and achievements of our forces, by sea and
land. I computed the number of our people, by reckoning how
many millions there might be of each religious sect, or political
party among us. I did not omit even our sports and pastimes,
or any other particular which I thought might redound to the
honor of my country. And I finished all with a brief historical
account of affairs and events in England for about a hundred
years past.
This conversation was not ended under five audiences, each
of several hours; and the king heard the whole with great
attention, frequently taking notes of what I spoke, as well as
memorandums of what questions he intended to ask me.
When I had put an end to these long discourses, his majesty,
in a sixth audience, consulting his notes, proposed many doubts,
queries, and objections, upon every article. He asked, “what
methods were used to cultivate the minds and bodies of our
young nobility, and in what kind of business they commonly
spent the first and teachable part of their lives? What course
was taken to supply that assembly, when any noble family
became extinct? What qualifications were necessary in those
who are to be created new lords: whether the humor of the
prince, a sum of money to a court lady, or a design of strength-
ening a party opposite to the public interest, ever happened to
be the motives in those advancements? * What share of
who turns and winds it at his pleasure. The only difference is, that Gog believed the
preacher of righteousness and religion."
*Y*
The former comparison of the Church to the ark, which Warburton's correspondent ap-
pears to have noticed, is not less characteristic. The Church, like the ark of Noah, is
worth saving; not for the sake of the unclean beasts and vermin that almost filled it, and
probably made most noise and clamor in it, but for the little corner of rationality, that was
as much distressed by the stink within as by the tempest without."
* A bill for the Limitation of the Peerage was passed by the House of Lords in 1719;
but after a long debate, was rejected by an overwhelming majority of the Commons.
this occasion, the Tories joined with that section of the Whigs which recognized Walpole as
■ leader, Swift unconsciously has adopted a portion of the reasoning of his great enemy.
+
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
17:
knowledge these lords had in the laws of their country, and
how they came by it, so as to enable them to decide the proper-
ties of their fellow-subjects in the last resort? Whether they
were always so free from avarice, partialities, or want, that a
bribe, or some other sinister view, could have no place among
them? Whether those holy lords I spoke of were always pro-
moted to that rank upon account of their knowledge in reli-
gious matters, and the sanctity of their lives; had never been
compliers with the times, while they were common priests; or
slavish prostitute chaplains to some nobleman, whose opinions
they continued servilely to follow, after they were admitted
into that assembly ?”*
He then desired to know, "what arts were practised in
electing those whom I called commoners; whether a stranger
with a strong purse, might not influence the vulgar voters to
choose him before their own landlord, or the most considerable
gentleman in the neighborhood? How it came to pass, that
people were so violently bent upon getting into this assembly,
which I allowed to be a great trouble and expense, often to the
ruin of their families, without any salary or pension; because
*Swift very frequently assailed the Irish bench of bishops, asserting that they were
ignorant of the creed of their own church; in one of these attacks on the episcopal body, he
ays,
Of whom there are not four at most
Who know there is an Holy Ghost;
And when they boast they have conferr❜d it,
Like Paul's Ephesians, never heard it;
And when they gave it 'tis well known,
They gave what never was their own.
In another political squib, we find the following bitter lines,-
Let prelates by their good behavior,
Convince us they believe a Saviour;
Nor sell, what they so dearly bought,
This country, now their own, for nought.
The Bishop of Kilkenny was particularly obnoxious to the Dean, and bears the brunt of
Swift's fierce attack on the Irish bench for proposing to divide the church livings.
Old Latimer, preaching, did fairly describe
A bishop, who ruled all the rest of his tribe :
And who is this bishop? and where did he dwell?
Why, truly, 'tis Satan, Archbishop of Hell:
And he was a primate, and he wore a mitre,
Surrounded with jewels of sulphur and nitre.
How nearly this bishop our bishops resembles!
But he has the odds who believes and who trembles.
Could you see his Grim Grace, for a pound to a penny,
You'd swear it must be the baboon of Kilkenny;
Poor Satan will think the comparison odious;
I wish I could find him out one more commodious.
But this I am sure, the most reverend old dragon
Had got on the bench many bishops suffragan;
And all men believe he resides there incog.
To give them by turns an invisible jog.
172
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
this appeared such an exalted strain of virtue and public spirit,
that his majesty seemed to doubt it might possibly not be
And he desired to know,
always sincere?"*
CC whether such
zealous gentlemen could have any views or refunding them-
selves for the charges and trouble they were at, by sacrificing
the public good to the designs of a weak and vicious prince,
in conjunction with a corrupted ministry?" He multiplied his
questions, and sifted me thoroughly upon every part of this
head, proposing numberless inquiries and objections, which I
think it not prudent or convenient to repeat.
Upon what I said in relation to our courts of justice his
majesty desired to be satisfied in several points: and this I
was the better able to do, having been formerly almost ruined
by a long suit in chancery, which was decreed for me with
costs. He asked, "what time was usually spent in determin-
ing between right and wrong, and what degree of expense ?
Whether advocates and orators had liberty to plead in causes
manifestly known to be unjust, vexatious, or oppressive?
Whether party, in religion or politics, were observed to be of
any weight in the scale of justice? Whether those pleading
orators were persons educated in the general knowledge of
equity, or only in provincial, national, and other local customs?
Whether they or their judges had any part in penning those
laws, which they assumed the liberty of interpreting, and gloss-
Considerable excitement was produced by Sir John Cope having charged Sir Francis
Page, one of the barons of the Exchequer, with endeavoring to corrupt the borough of Ban-
bury, in order to secure the return of Sir William Codrington at the next election. The
charge was heard at the bar of the House of Commons, and though the ministers of the day
exerted all their influence to shield the judge, he was acquitted by a majority of four only, the
numbers being 128 to 124. A bill for securing the Freedom of Elections was about the same
time rejected by the House of Lords, through the influence of the ministers, who had failed
to strangle it in the Commons. This afforded the Tories an opportunity of representing
themselves as the friends, and the Whigs as the enemies of constitutional liberty, which they
were too wise to neglect. During the debate in the Commons, Mr. Hutcheson, member
for Hastings, used the following language, which seems to have suggested the king of
Brobdingnag's queries to Swift: "But what in God's name can all this tend to? What other
construction can any man in common sense put upon all those things, but that there seems
to have been a grand design of violence and oppression, first to humble you, and make your
necks pliable to the yoke, and then to finish the work, by tempting the poverty and necessi-
ties of the people to sell themselves into the most abject and detestable slavery, for that
very money which had been either unnecessarily raised, or mercilessly and unjustly plun❤
dered and torn from their very bowels? And thus you may be in a fair way of being beaten
by your own weapons. Nor can I imagine what inducement men have who run from
borough to borough, and purchase their elections at such extravagant rates, unless it be
from a strong expectation of being well paid for their votes, and of receiving ample recom-
pense and reward for the secret service they have covenanted to perform here *** It were
very much to be wished, that gentlemen of estates and families in the country would heartily
unite in this particular, of keeping the elections in the several counties among themselves;
that they would resolve inviolably to support each other's interests against the encroach-
ments and corrupt applications of strangers, let them come from what quarter they will,
If this were done, it would in a great measure put an end to those dangerous and infamous
practices that are now on foot, and we might hope once more to see this House filled with
gentlemen of free and independent fortunes, such as would be above making their court
anywhere at the expense of their country, and would despise all manner of slavish conces-
sions to men in power."
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
173
ing upon at their pleasure? Whether they had ever, at differ-
ent times, pleaded for and against the same cause, and cited
precedents to prove contrary opinions? Whether they were a
rich or a poor corporation? Whether they received any pecu-
niary reward for pleading, or delivering their opinions? And
particularly, whether they were ever admitted as members in
the lower senate?" *
He fell next upon the management of our treasury; and
said, "he thought my memory had failed me, because I com-
puted our taxes at about five or six millions a year, and when I
came to mention the issues, he found they sometimes amounted
to more than double; for the notes he had taken were very
particular in this point, because he hoped, as he told me, that
the knowledge of our conduct might be useful to him, and he
could not be deceived in his calculations.† But, if what I told
him were true, he was still at a loss how a kingdom could run
out of its estate, like a private person." He asked me
"who
were our creditors; and where we found money to pay them?"
He wondered to hear me talk of such chargeable and expensive
wars; "that certainly we must be a quarrelsome people, or
live among very bad neighbors, and that our generals must
needs be richer than our kings." He asked "what business
we had out of our own islands, unless upon the score of trade or
treaty, or to defend the coasts with our fleet?" Above all, he
was amazed to hear me talk of a mercenary standing army, in the
nidst of peace, and among a free people. He said, “if we were
governed by our own consent, in the persons of our representa-
tives, he could not imagine of whom we were afraid, or against
whom we were to fight; and would hear my opinion, whether
* In the session of 1720 Sir William Thompson, Solicitor-General, charged Mr. Lech-
mere, Attorney-General, with breach of his oath, trust, and duty, as a privy councillor,
saying that he acted as counsel, and received sums of money for his advice in matters to
him referred by the Privy Council as Attorney-General. The charge was investigated by a
committee of the whole House; it appeared that Mr. Lechmere had taken nothing but his
usual fees as chamber counsellor, and the accusation was declared by the House to be false,
scandalous, and malicious. The lawyers of Swift's day were for the most part Whigs, and
strongly attached to the Protestant succession; they were on this account particularly
odius to the Jacobites, and when individual satire failed, bitter attacks were made on the
entire legal profession. It must, however, be added, that the Whig lawyers were too ready
to extend the dangerous principle of constructive treason, and far too ardent in their pros-
ecutions for libel. Swift was particularly hostile to lawyers on account of the vexatious
prosecutions undertaken against the printers and publishers of the Drapier's Letters, and he
never omits an opportunity of venting his indignation.
†The National Debt was first incurred by the Whig administrations in the reigns of
William II. and Queen Anne, when the ordinary revenue was found inadequate to the
expenses of the great wars against France. It was a favorite topic of declamation with
their Tory opponents, and was not the least efficacious in depriving the Whigs of their
popularity. In 1722, the Tories proposed the following resolution in the Lords: That the
lessening the public debt annually by all proper methods is necessary to the restoring and
securing the public credit." The previous question was carried: upon which, a spirited
protest was entered on the Journals, and copies of it industriously circulated through the
Z
country
174
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
a private man's house might not better be defended by him
self, his children, and family, than by half a dozen rascals,
picked up at a venture in the streets for small wages, who
might get a hundred times more by cutting their throats."*
He laughed at my "odd kind of arithmetic," as he was
pleased to call it, "in reckoning the numbers of our people by
a computation drawn from the several sects among us in relig
ion and politics." He said "he knew no reason why those,
who entertain opinions prejudicial to the public, should be
obliged to change, or should not be obliged to conceal them.
And as it was tyranny in any government to require the first,
so it was weakness not to enforce the second: for a man may
be allowed to keep poisons in his closet, but not to vend them
about for cordials." † t
He observed, "that among the diversions of our nobility
and gentry, I had mentioned gaming; he desired to know at
what age this entertainment was usually taken up, and when it
was laid down; how much of their time it employed: whether
it ever went so high as to affect their fortunes; whether mean,
vicious people, by their dexterity in that art, might not arrive
at great riches, and sometimes keep our very nobles in depen-
dence, as well as habituate them to vile companions; wholly
take from them the improvement of their minds, and force
them, by the losses they received, ‡ to learn and practice that
infamous dexterity upon others?"
He was perfectly astonished with the historical account I
gave him of our affairs during the last century; protesting it
was only a heap of conspiracies, rebellions, murders, mas-
sacres, revolutions, banishments, the very worst effects that
avarice, faction, hypocrisy, perfidiousness, cruelty, rage, mad-
ness, hatred, envy, lust, malice, and ambition, could produce.
*One of the most memorable debates in the reign of George I. was on the grant for
maintaining a standing army of sixteen thousand men. Mr. Shippen and Mr. Jeffries
resisted the proposal with great energy, and the former used such severity of language that
he was committed to the Tower. The Tories, both on this question and on the Debt, had
a decided advantage in argument over their adversaries, especially as they could appeal to
a parliamentary resolution in the reign of Charles II., which declared, "That the continu-
ance of standing forces in this nation, other than the militia, is illegal, and a great grievance
and vexation to the people." Mr. Shippen, in his speech, perplexed the Whigs by referring
to their own recorded principles. "It is, said he, "every year declared in the Act of
Mutiny and Desertion, that the keeping up a standing army in time of peace, is against
law; and as the freeing us from it was one of the ends of the Revolution, so no doubt, the
preserving us forever from an attempt of the like nature, was one of those innumerable
glorious advantages proposed by the Act of Succession."
It is not easy to reconcile these intolerant sentiments with the opinions on toleration
already noticed in the Voyage to Lilliput. There was at this time reason to fear that the
Presbyterians would obtain the ascendency in the Irish Parliament, and abolish episcopacy
hence probably arises Swift's bitterness against sectaries, which is very strongly manifested
here, and in his celebrated Letter on the Sacramental Test.
+ Receiving a loss, is certainly not a good expression; it should, "the losses they have
sustained.” Sherida
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
175
His majesty, in another audience, was at the pains to reca
pitulate the sum of all I had spoken; compared the questions
he made with the answers I had given; then taking me into
his hands, and stroking me gently, delivered himself in these
words, which I shall never forget, nor the manner he spoke them
in: "
'My little friend Grildrig, you have made a most admirable
panegyric upon your country; you have clearly proved that
ignorance, idleness, and vice, are the proper ingredients for
qualifying a legislator; that laws are best explained, inter-
preted, and applied, by those whose interest and abilities lie in
perverting, confounding, and eluding them. I observe among
you some lines of an institution, which in its original might have
been tolerable, but these half erased, and the rest wholly
blurred and blotted by corruptions. It does not appear, from
all you have said, how any one perfection is required toward
the procurement of any one station among you; much less that
men are ennobled on account of their virtue; that priests are
advanced for their piety or learning; soldiers, for their con-
duct or valor: judges, for their integrity; senators, for the
love of their country; or counsellors for their wisdom. As for
yourself," continued the king, "who have spent the greatest
part of your life in travelling, I am well disposed to hope you
may hitherto have escaped many vices of your country. But
by what I have gathered from your own relation, and the an-
swers I have with much pains wringed and extorted from you,
I cannot but conclude the bulk of your natives to be the most
pernicious race of little odious vermin that nature ever suf-
fered to crawl upon the surface of the earth."
*
Instead of "wringed," it should have been "
wrung.”—Sheridan
176
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CHAPTER VI
THE AUTHOR'S LOVE OF HIS COUNTRY-HE MAKES A PROPOSAL
OF MUCH ADVANTAGE TO THE KING, WHICH IS REJECTED—
THE KING'S GREAT IGNORANCE IN POLITICS THE LEARN-
ING OF THAT COUNTRY VERY IMPERFECT AND CONFINED
THE LAWS AND MILITARY AFFAIRS, AND PARTIES IN
THE STATE.
W
And
Love of truth could alone have hindered me from concealing
this part of my story. It was in vain to discover my resent-
ments, which were always turned into ridicule; and I was
forced to rest with patience, while my noble and beloved country
was so injuriously treated. I am as heartily sorry as any of
my readers can possibly be, that such an occasion was given ;
but this prince happened to be so curious and inquisitive upon
every particular, that it could not consist either with gratitude
or good manners, to refuse giving him what satisfaction I was
able. Yet thus much I may be allowed to say in my own vin-
dication, that I artfully eluded many of his questions, and gave
to every point a more favorable turn, by many degrees, than
the strictness of truth would allow. For I have always borne
that laudable partiality to my own country, which Dionysius
Halicarnassensis, with so much justice, recommends to an his-
torian: I would hide the frailties and deformities of my politi-
cal mother, and place her virtues and beauties in the most ad
vantageous light. This was my sincere endeavor in those many
discourses I had with that monarch, although it unfortunately
failed of success.
But great allowances should be given to a king who lives
wholly secluded from the rest of the world, and must therefore
be altogether unacquainted with the manners and customs that
most prevail in other nations; the want of which knowledge
will ever produce many prejudices, and a certain narrowness of
thinking, from which we and the politer countries of Europe,
are wholly exempted. And it would be hard indeed, if so
remote a prince's notions of virtue and vice were to be offered
as a standard for all mankind.
To confirm what I have now said, and further to show the
miserable effects of a confined education, I shall here insert a
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
[77
an in-
passage, which will hardly obtain belief. In hopes to ingratiate
myself farther into his majesty's favor, I told him of
vention, discovered between three and four hundred years ago,
to make a certain powder, into a heap of which, the smallest
spark of fire falling, would kindle the whole in a moment,
although it were as big as a mountain, and make it all fly up in
the air together, with a noise and agitation greater than thunder.
That a proper quantity of this powder rammed into a hollow tube
of brass or iron, according to its bigness, would drive a ball of
iron or lead, with such violence and speed, as nothing was able
to sustain its force. That the largest balls thus discharged,
would not only destroy whole ranks of an army at once, but
batter the strongest walls to the ground; sink down ships with
a thousand men in each, to the bottom of the sea; and when
linked together, by a chain, would cut through masts and rig-
ging, divide hundreds of bodies in the middle, and lay all waste
before them. That we often put this powder into large hollow
balls of iron, and discharged them by an engine into some city
we were besieging, which would rip up the pavements tear tne
houses to pieces, burst and throw the splinters, on every side,
dashing out the brains of all who came near. That I knew the
ingredients very well, which were cheap and common; I un-
derstood the manner of compounding them, and could direct
his workmen how to make those tubes, of a size proportion-
able to all other things in his majesty's kingdom, and the
largest need not be above a hundred feet long; twenty or
thirty of which tubes, charged with the proper quantity of pow-
der and balls, would batter down the walls of the strongest
town in his dominions in a few hours, or destroy the whole
metropolis, if ever it should pretend to dispute his absolute
commands. This I humbly offered to his majesty, as a small
tribute of acknowledgment, in return of so many marks that I
had received of his royal favor and protection."
The king was struck with horror at the description I had
given of these terrible engines, and the proposal I had made.
"He was amazed, how so impotent and grovelling an insect as
I" (these were his expressions) "could entertain such inhuman
ideas, and in so familiar a manner, as to appear wholly unmoved
at all the scenes of blood and desolation which I had painted,
as the common effects of those destructive machines; whereof,"
he said, “some evil genius, enemy to mankind, must have been
the first contriver. As for himself, he protested, that although
few things delighted him so much as new discoveries in art or
in nature, yet he would rather lose half his kingdom than be
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GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
privy to such a secret; which he commanded me, as I valued
my life, never to mention any more." *
A strange effect of narrow principles and views! that a
prince possessed of every quality which procures veneration,
love, and esteem; of strong parts, great wisdom, and profound
learning; endowed with admirable talents, and almost adored
by his subjects, should from a nice unnecessary scruple, where-
of in Europe we can have no conception, let slip an opportunity
put into his hands that would have made him absolute master
of the lives, the liberties, and the fortunes of his people.t
Neither do I say this, with the least intention to detract from
the many virtues of that excellent king, whose character, I am
sensible, will, on this account, be very much lessened in the
opinion of an English reader; but I take this defect among ther
to have risen from their ignorance, by not having hitherto re-
duced politics into a science, as the more acute wits of Europe
have done. For, I remember very well, in a discourse one day
with the king, when I happened to say, "there were several
thousand books among us written upon the art of government,"
it gave him (directly contrary to my intention) a very mean
opinion of our understandings. He professed both to abom-
inate and despise all mystery, refinement, and intrigue, either
in a prince or a minister. He could not tell what I meant by
secrets of state, where an enemy, or some rival nation, were not
in the case. He confined the knowledge of governing within
very narrow bounds, to common sense and reason, to justice
and lenity, to the speedy determination of civil and criminal
causes; with some other obvious topics, which are not worth
considering. And he gave it for his opinion, "that whoever
could make two ears of corn, or two blades of grass, to grow
upon a spot of ground, where only one grew before, would de-
serve better of mankind, and do more essential service to his
country than the whole race of politicians put together."
The learning of this people is very defective; consisting
*It is scarcely necessary to expose the fallacious reasoning of this passage; everybody
knows that wars have been far less sanguinary since the invention of gunpowder than they
were before, and that every improvement in the arts of destruction has been followed by a
saving of human life. Swift, however, knew that the glories of Marlborough's campaigns
were the chief source of the popularity of the Whigs, and as he could not deny the military
merits of these victories, he hoped to weaken their influence by declaiming against wars in
general.
↑ It was more than hinted by the Tories, that the House of Brunswick intended to make
use of the standing army to subvert British liberty. Mr. Shippen, in the speech to which
allusion has been already made, said, "That the second paragraph of the King's speech
seemed rather to be calculated for the meridian of Germany than Great Britain; and that
the King was a stranger to our language and constitution." It was for these expressions
that he was committed to the Tower.
The Tories were always anxious to identify themselves with the agricultural interes
to which Swift consequently loses no opportunity of paying a compliment.
}
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
179
only in morality, history, poetry, and mathematics, wherein they
must be allowed to excel. But the last of these is wholly ap-
plied to what may be useful in life, to the improvement of agri-
culture and all mechanical arts; so that among us, it would be
little esteemed. And as to ideas, entities, abstractions, and
transcendentals, I could never drive the least conception into
their heads.
No law of that country must exceed in words the number of
letters in their alphabet, which consists only of two-and-twenty.
But indeed few of them extend even to that length. They are
expressed in the most plain and simple terms, wherein those
people are not mercurial enough to discover above one inter-
pretation; and to write a comment upon any law is a capital
crime. As to the decision of civil causes, or proceedings against
criminals, their precedents are so few, that they have little
reason to boast of any extraordinary skill in either.
They have had the art of printing, as well as the Chinese,
time out of mind: but their libraries are not very large; for
that of the king, which is reckoned the largest, does not amount
to a above a thousand volumes, placed in a gallery of twelve
hundred feet long, whence I had liberty to borrow what books
I pleased. The queen's joiner had contrived in one of Glum-
dalclitch's rooms, a kind of wooden machine five-and-twenty
feet high, formed like a standing ladder; the steps were each
fifty feet long; it was indeed a movable pair of stairs, the lowest
end placed at ten feet distance from the wall of the chamber.
The book I had a mind to read, was put up leaning against the
wall: I first mounted to the upper step of the ladder, and turn-
ing my face towards the book, began at the top of the page,
and so walking to the right or left about eight or ten paces, ac-
cording to the length of the lines, till I had gotten a little below
the level of mine eyes, and then descending gradually till I came
to the bottom: after which I mounted again, and began the
other page in the same manner, and so turned over the leaf,
which I could easily do with both my hands, for it was as thick
and stiff as a pasteboard, and in the largest folios not above
eighteen or twenty feet long.
Their style is clear, masculine, and smooth, but not florid;
for they avoid nothing more than multiplying unnecessary
words, or using various expressions. I have perused many of
their books, especially those in history and morality. Among
the rest, I was much diverted with a little old treatise, which
always lay in Glumdalclitch's bedchamber, and belonged to her
governess, a grave elderly gentlewoman, who dealt in writings
180
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
of morality and devotion. The book treats of the weakness
of human kind, and is in little esteem except among the women
and the vulgar. However, I was curious to see what an author
of that country could say upon such a subject. This writer went
through all the usual topics of European moralists, showing
"how diminutive, contemptible, and helpless an animal was
man in his own nature: how unable to defend himself from in
clemencies of the air, or the fury of wild beasts: how much he
was excelled by one creature in strength, by another in speed, by
a third in foresight, by a fourth in industry." He added, "that
nature was degenerated in these latter declining ages of the
world, and could now produce only small abortive births, in
comparison of those in ancient times." He said, "it was very
reasonable to think, not only that the species of men were
originally much larger, but also that there must have been giants
in former ages: which, as it is asserted by history and tradition,
so it has been confirmed by huge bones and skulls, casually
dug up in several parts of the kingdom, far exceeding the com-
mon dwindled race of men in our days." He argued, "that
the very laws of nature absolutely required we should have
been made, in the beginning, of a size more large and robust,
not so liable to destruction from every little accident, of a tile
falling from a house, or a stone cast from the hand of a boy,
or being drowned in a little brook." From this way of rea-
soning, the author drew several moral applications, useful in
the conduct of life, but needless here to repeat. For my own
part, I could not avoid reflecting how universally this talent
was spread, of drawing lectures in morality, or indeed rather
matter of discontent and repining, from the quarrels we raise
with nature. And I believe, upon a strict inquiry, those quar-
rels might be shown as ill-grounded among us as they are among
that people.
As to their military affairs, they boast that the king's army
consists of a hundred and seventy-six thousand foot and thirty-
two thousand horse: if that may be called an army, which is
made up of tradesmen in the several cities, and farmers in the
country, whose commanders are only the nobility and gentry,
without pay or reward. They are indeed perfect enough in
their exercises, and under very good discipline, wherein I saw
no great merit; for how should it be otherwise, where every
farmer is under the command of his own landlord, and every
citizen under that of the principal men of his own city, chosen,
after the manner of Venice, by ballot? I have often seen the
militia of Lorbrulgrud drawn out to exercise, in a great field,
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
181
near the city, of twenty miles square. There were in all rot
above twenty-five thousand foot, and six thousand horse; but
it was impossible for me to compute their number, considering
the space of ground they took up. A cavalier mounted on a
large steed might be about ninety feet high. I have seen this
whole body of horse, upon a word of command, draw their
swords at once, and brandish them in the air. Imagination
can figure nothing so grand, so surprising, and so astonishing!
it looked as if ten thousand flashes of lightning were darting
at the same time from every quarter of the sky.
I was curious to know how this prince, to whose dominions
there is no access from any other country, came to think of
armies, or to teach his people the practice of military discipline.
But I was soon informed, both by conversation and reading
their histories; for, in the course of many ages, they have been
troubled with the same disease to which the whole race of man-
kind is subject: the nobility often contending for power, the
people for liberty, and the king for absolute dominion. All
which, however happily tempered by the laws of that kingdom,
have been sometimes violated by each of the three parties, and
have more than once occasioned civil wars; the last whereof
was happily put an end to by this prince's grandfather, in a
general composition, and the militia, then settled with common
consent, has been ever since kept in the strictest duty.
CHAPTER VIII.
THE KING AND QUEEN MAKE A PROGRESS TO THE FRONTIERS~~
THE AUTHOR ATTENDS THEM-THE MANNER IN WHICH HE
LEAVES THE COUNTRY VERY PARTICULARLY RELATED-HE
RETURNS TO ENGLAND.
JUNCTURES of perilous circumstances, from which I had al-
ready escaped, inspired me with a strong impulse that I should
some time recover my liberty, though it was impossible to con-
jecture by what means, or to form any project with the least
hope of succeeding. The ship in which I sailed was the first
known to be driven within sight of that coast, and the king had
given strict orders, "that if at any time another appeared, it
should be taken ashore, and with all its crew and passengers
182
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
brought in a tumbril to Lorbrulgrud." He was strongly bent
to get me a woman of my own size, by whom I might propa-
gate the breed: but I think I should rather have died than
undergone the disgrace of leaving a posterity to be kept in
cages, like tame canary birds, and perhaps, in time, sold about
the kingdom, to persons of quality, for curiosities. I was in-
deed treated with much kindness: I was the favorite of a great
king and queen, and the delight of the whole court; but it was
upon such a foot as ill became the dignity of human-kind. I
could never forget these domestic pledges I had left behind me.
I wanted to be among people with whom I could converse
upon even terms, and walk about the streets and fields without
being afraid of being trod to death like a frog or a young puppy.
But my deliverance came sooner than I expected, and in a
manner not very common: the whole story and circumstances
of which I shall faithfully relate.
I had now been two years in the country: and about the
beginning of the third, Glumdalclitch and I attended the king
and queen, in a progress to the south coast of the kingdom.
I was carried as usual, in my travelling box, which, as I have
already described, was a very convenient closet of twelve feet
wide. And I had ordered a hammock to be fixed, by silken
ropes, from the four corners at the top, to break the jolts when
a servant carried me before him on horseback, as I sometimes
desired; and would often sleep in my hammock while we were
upon the road. On the roof of my closet, not directly over
the middle of the hammock, I ordered the joiner to cut a hole
of a foot square, to give me air in hot weather as I slept; which
hole I shut at pleasure, with a board that drew backward and
forward through a groove.
When we came to our journey's end, the king thought
proper to pass a few days at a palace he has near Flanflasnic,
a city within eighteen English miles of the sea-side. Glumdal-
clitch and I were much fatigued: I had gotten a small cold,
but the poor girl was so ill as to be confined to her chamber.
I longed to see the ocean, which must be the only scene of my
escape, if ever it should happen. I pretended to be worse than
I really was, and desired leave to tale the fresh air of the sea,
with a page, whom I was very fond or, and who had sometimes
been trusted with me. I shall never forget with what unwilling-
ness Glumdalclitch consented, nor the strict charge she gave
the page to be careful of me, bursting at the same time into a
flood of tears, as if she had some foreboding of what was to
happen. The boy took me out in my box, about half an hour's
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
183
潺
​2
walk from the palace, towards the rocks on the sea-shore. I
ordered him to set me down, and lifting up one of my sashes,
cast many a wistful melancholy look towards the sea. I found
myself not very well, and told the page that I had a mind to
take a nap in my hammock, which I hoped would do me good.
I got in, and the boy shut the window close down to keep out the
cold. I soon fell asleep, and all I can conjecture is, while I the
slept, the page, thinking no danger could happen, went among
the rocks to look for birds' eggs, having before observed him
from my window searching about, and picking up one or two in
the clefts. Be that as it will, I found myself suddenly awakened
with a violent pull upon the ring, which was fastened at the top
of my box for the convenience of carriage. I felt my box raised
very high in the air, and then borne forward with prodigious
speed. The first jolt had like to have shaken me out of my ham-
mock, but afterwards the motion was easy enough. I called out
several times as loud as I could raise my voice, but all to no
purpose. I looked towards my windows, and could see noth-
ing but the clouds and sky. I heard a noise over my head,
like the clapping of wings, and then began to perceive the wo-
ful condition I was in; that some eagle had got the cord of my
box in his beak, with an intent to let it fall on the rock, like a
tortoise in a shell, and then pick out my body and devour it :
for the sagacity and smell of this bird enable him to discover
his quarry at a great distance, though better concealed than I
could be within a two-inch board. In a little time I observed
the noise and flutter of wings to increase very fast, and my boy
was tossed up and down, like a sign in a windy day. I heard
several bangs or buffets, as I thought, given to the eagle (for
such I am certain it must have been that held the cord of my
box in his beak), and then, all on a sudden, felt myself falling
perpendicularly down, for above a minute, but with such in-
credible swiftness, that I almost lost my breath. My fall was
stopped by a terrible squash, that sounded louder to my ears
than the cataract of Niagara; * after which, I was quite in the
dark for another minute, and then my box began to rise so high,
that I could see light from the tops of the windows. I now
perceived I was fallen into the sea. My box, by the weight of
my body, the goods that were in it, and the broad plates of iron
fixed for strength at the four corners of the top and bottom,
floated about five feet deep in water. I did then, and do now
*This cataract is produced by the fall of a conflux of water (formed of the four vast
lakes of Canada) from a rocky precipice, the perpendicular height of which is one hundred
and thirty-seven feet; and it is said to have been heard fifteen leagues.-Hawkesworth.
ཡ་
184
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
suppose, that the eagle which flew away with my box was pur
sued by two or three others, and forced to let me drop, while
he defended himself against the rest, who hoped to share in
the prey. The plates of iron fastened at the bottom of thế
box (for those were the strongest) preserved the balance while.
it fell, and hindered it from being broken on the surface of the
water. Every joint of it was well grooved; and the door did
not move on hinges, but up and down like a sash, which kept
my closet so tight that very little water came in. I got with
much difficulty out of my hammock, having first ventured to
draw back the slip-board on the roof already mentioned, con-
trived on purpose to let in air, for want of which I found my-
self almost stifled.
How often did I then wish myself with my dear Glumdal-
clitch, from whom one single hour had so far divided me! And
I may say with truth, that in the midst of my own misfortunes
I could not forbear lamenting my poor nurse, the grief she
would suffer for my loss, the displeasure of the queen, and the
ruin of her fortune. Perhaps many travellers have not been
under greater difficulties and distress than I was at this junc-
ture, expecting every moment to see my box dashed to pieces,
or at least overset by the first violent blast or rising waye. A
breach in one single pane of glass would have been immediate
death nor could anything have preserved the windows, but
the strong lattice wires placed on the outside, against accidents
in travelling. I saw the water ooze in at several crannies,
although the leaks were not considerable, and I endeavored to
stop them as well as I could. I was not able to lift up the roof
of my closet, which otherwise I certainly should have done,
and sat on the top of it: where I might at least preserve my-
self some hours longer, than by being shut up (as I may call
it) in the hold. Or if I escaped these dangers for a day or
two, what could I expect, but a miserable death of cold and
hunger? I was for four hours under these circumstances, ex-
pecting, and indeed wishing, every moment to be my last.
I have already told the reader that there were two strong
staples fixed upon that side of my box which had no window;
and into which the servant who used to carry me on horse-
back, would put a leathern belt, and buckle it about his waist.
Being in this disconsolate state, I heard, or at least thought I
heard, some kind of grating noise on that side of my box
where the staples were fixed; and soon after I began to fancy
that the box was pulled or towed along the sea; for I now and
then felt a sort of tugging, which made the waves rise near the
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
185
tops of my windows, leaving me almost in the dark. This gave
me some faint hopes of relief, although I was not able to imagine
how it could be brought about. I ventured to unscrew one of
my chairs, which were always fastened to the floor; and having
made a hard shift to screw it down again directly under the
slipping-board that I had lately opened, I mounted on the chair,
and putting my mouth as near as I could to the hole, I called
for help in a loud voice, and in all the languages I understood.
I then fastened my handkerchief to a stick I usually carried,
and thrusting it up the hole, waved it several times in the air,
that if any boat or ship were near, the seamen might conjecture
some unhappy mortal to be shut up in the box.
I found no effect from all I could do, but plainly perceived
my closet to be moved along; and in the space of an hour, or
better, that side of the box where the staples were, and had no
windows, struck against something that was hard. I appre-
hended it to be a rock, and found myself tossed more than
ever. I plainly heard a noise upon the cover of my closet,
like that of a cable, and the grating of it as it passed through
the ring. I then found myself hoisted up, by degrees, at least
three feet higher than I was before. Whereupon I again thrust
up my stick and handkerchief, calling for help till I was al-
most hoarse. In return to which, I heard a great shout re-
peated three times, giving me such transports of joy, as are
not to be conceived but by those who feel them. I now heard
a trampling over my head, and somebody calling through the
hole with a loud voice, in the English tongue, "If there be any-
body below, let them speak." I answered, "I was an English-
man, drawn by ill fortune into the greatest calamity that ever
any creature underwent, and begged, by all that was moving,
to be delivered out of the dungeon I was in." The voice re-
plied, "I was safe, for my box was fastened to their ship; and
the carpenter should immediately come and saw a hole in the
cover, large enough to pull me out." I answered “that was
needless, and would take up too much time; for there was no
more to be done, but let one of the crew put his finger into
the ring, and take the box out of the sea into the ship, and so
into the captain's cabin.” * Some of them, upon hearing me
talk so wildly, thought I was mad; others laughed; for indeed
* There are several little incidents which show the author to have had a deep knowledge
of human nature, and I think this is one. Although the principal advantages enumerated
by Gulliver in the beginning of this chapter, of mingling again among his countrymen, de-
pended on their being of the same size with himself, yet this is forgotten in his ardor to be
delivered: and he is afterwards betrayed into the same absurdity, by his zeal to preserve
his furniture.-Hauberworth.
186
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
it never came into my head, that I was now got among pec.
of my own stature and strength. The carpenter came, and in
a few minutes sawed a passage about four feet square, then let
down a small ladder, upon which I mounted, ana mence was
taken into the ship in a very weak condition.
The sailors were all amazement, and asked me a thousand
questions, which I had no inclination to answer. 1 was equally
confounded at the sight of so many pigmies, for such I took
them to be, after having so long accustomed mine eyes to the
monstrous objects I had left. But the captain, Mr. Thomas
Wilcocks, an honest worthy Shropshire man, observing I was
ready to faint, took me into his cabin, gave me a cordial to
comfort me, and made me turn in upon his own bed, advising
me to take a little rest, of which I had great need. Before I
went to sleep, I gave him to understand that I had some vàlu-
able furniture in my box, too good to be lost: a fine hammock,
a handsome field-bed, two chairs, a table, and a cabinet; that
my closet was hung on all sides, or rather quilted, with silk
and cotton; that if he would let one of the crew bring my
closet into his cabin, I would open it there before him, and
show him my goods. The captain, hearing me utter these
absurdities, concluded I was raving; however (I suppose to
pacify me), he promised to give order as I desired, and going
upon deck, sent some of his men down into my closet, whence
(as I afterwards found), they drew up all my goods, and
stripped off the quilting; but the chairs, cabinet, and bedstead,
being screwed to the floor, were much damaged by the igno-
rance of the seamen, who tore them up by force. Then they
knocked off some of the boards for the use of the ship, and
when they had got all they had a mind for, let the hull drop
into the sea, which, by reason of many breaches made in the
bottom and sides, sunk outright. And, indeed, I was glad not
to have been a spectator of the havoc they made; because I
am confident it would have sensibly touched me, by bringing
former passages into my mind which I would rather have
forgot.
·
I slept some hours, but perpetually disturbed with dreams
of the place I had left, and the dangers I had escaped. How-
ever, upon waking, I found myself much recovered. It was
now about eight o'clock at night, and the captain ordered sup-
per immediately, thinking I had already fasted too long. He
entertained me with great kindness, observing me not to look
wildly, or talk inconsistently; and when we were left alone,
desired I would give him a relation of my travels, and by what
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
187
accident I came to be set adrift in that monstrous wooden
chest. He said, "that about twelve o'clock at noon, as he
was looking through his glass, he spied it at a distance, and
thought it was a sail, which he had a mind to make, being not
much out of his course, in hopes of buying some biscuit, his
own beginning to fall short. That upon coming nearer, and
finding his error, he sent out his long-boat, to discover what it
was; that his men came back in fright, swearing they had seen
a swimming house. That he laughed at their folly, and went
himself in the boat, ordering his men to take a strong cable
along with them. That the weather being calm, he rowed
round me several times, observed my windows and wire lat-
tices that defended them. That he discovered two staples
upon one side, which was all of boards, without any passage
for light. He then commanded his men to row up to that side,
and fastening a cable to one of the staples, ordered them to
tow my chest, as they called it, towards the ship. When it was
there, he gave directions to fasten another cable to the ring
fixed in the cover, and to raise up my chest with pulleys, which
all the sailors were not able to do above two or three feet. He
said, they saw my stick and handkerchief thrust out of the
hole, and concluded that some unhappy man must be shut up
in the cavity." I asked, "whether he or the crew had seen
any prodigious birds in the air, about the time he first dis-
covered me?" To which he answered, "that discoursing this
matter with the sailors while I was asleep, one of them said, he
had observed three eagles flying towards the north, but re-
marked nothing of their being larger than the usual size;
which I suppose must be imputed to the great height they were
at; and he could not guess the reason of my question. I then
asked the captain, "how far he reckoned we might be from
land?" He said, "by the best computation he could make,
we were at least a hundred leagues." I assured him "that he
must be mistaken by almost half, for I had not left the coun-
try whence I came, above two hours before I dropped into the
sea." Whereupon he began again to think that my brain was
disturbed, of which he gave me a hint, and advised me to go
to bed in a cabin he had provided. I assured him, "I was
well refreshed with his good entertainment and company,
and
as much in my senses as ever I was in my life.' He then
grew serious, and desired to ask me freely, "whether I were
not troubled in my mind by the consciousness of some enor
mous crime, for which I was punished, at the command of
some prince, by exposing me in that chest; as great criminals,
""
188
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
in other countries, have been forced to sea in a leaky vessel,
without provisions: for although he should be sorry to have
taken so ill a man into his ship, yet he would engage his word
to set me safe ashore, in the first port where we arrived?"
He added, that his suspicions were much increased by some
very absurd speeches I had delivered at first to his sailors, and
afterwards to himself, in relation to my closet or chest, as well
as by my odd looks and behavior while I was at supper."
I begged his patience to hear me tell my story, which I
faithfully did, from the last time I left England, to the moment
he first discovered me. And as truth always forces its way
into rational minds, so this honest worthy gentleman, who had
some tincture of learning, and very good sense, was immedi-
ately convinced of my candor and veracity. But, farther to
confirm all I had said, I entreated him to give order that my
cabinet should be brought, of which I had the key in my
pocket; for he had already informed me how the seamen dis-
posed of my closet. I opened it in his own presence, and
showed him the small collection of rarities I made in the coun-
try from which I had been so strangely delivered. There was
the comb I had contrived out of the stumps of the king's beard,
and another of the same materials, but fixed into a paring of
her majesty's thumb-nail, which served for the back. There
was a collection of needles and pins, from a foot to half a yard
long; four wasp stings, like joiners' tacks; some combings of
the queen's hair, a gold ring which one day she made me a
present of, in a most obliging manner, taking it from her little
finger and throwing it over my head like a collar. I desired
the captain would please to accept this ring in return of his
civilities; which he absolutely refused. I showed him a corn
that I had cut off, with my own hand, from a maid of honor's
toe; it was about the bigness of a Kentish pippin, and grown
so hard, that when I returned to England, I got it hollowed
into a cup, and set in silver. Lastly, I desired him to see the
breeches I had then on, which were made of a mouse's skin.
I could force nothing on him but a footman's tooth, which
I observed him to examine with great curiosity, and found he
had a fancy for it. He received it with abundance of thanks,
more than such a trifle could deserve. It was drawn by an
unskilful surgeon, in a mistake, from one of Glumdalclitch's
men, who was afflicted with the toothache, but it was as sound
as any in his head. I got it cleaned, and put it into my cabi-
It was about a foot long, and four inches in diameter.
The captain was very well satisfied with this plain relation
net.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
189
I had given him, and said, "he hoped, when we returned to
England, I would oblige the world by putting it on paper, and
making it public." My answer was, "that I thought we were
overstocked with books of travels; that nothing could now
pass which was not extraordinary; wherein, I doubted some
authors less consulted truth than their own vanity, or interest,
or the diversion of ignorant readers; that my story could con-
tain little beside common events, without those ornamental
descriptions of strange plants, trees, birds, and other animals;
or of the barbarous customs and idolatry of savage people,
with which most writers abound. However, I thanked him
for his good opinion, and promised to take the matter into my
thoughts.'
""
He said, "he wondered at one thing very much, which was
to hear me speak so loud; asking me, whether the king and
queen of that country were thick of hearing?" I told him, “it
was what I had been used to for above two years past, and that
I admired as much at the voices of him and his men, who
seemed to me only to whisper, and yet I could hear them well
enough. But when I spoke in that country, it was like a man
talking in the streets, to another looking out from the top of a
steeple, unless when I was placed on a table, or held in any
person's hand." I told him, "I had likewise observed an-
other thing, that when I first got into the ship, and the sailors
stood all about me, I thought they were the most contemptible
little creatures I had ever beheld." For, indeed, while I was in
that prince's country, I could never endure to look in a glass
after mine eyes had been accustomed to such prodigious objects,
because the comparisons gave me so despicable a conceit of
myself. The captain said, "that while we were at supper he
observed me to look at everything with a sort of wonder, and
that I often seemed hardly able to contain my laughter, which
he knew not well how to take, but imputed it to some disorder
in my brain." I answered, "it was very true; and I wondered
how I could forbear, when I saw his dishes of the size of a silver
threepence, a leg of pork hardly a mouthful, a cup not so big as
a nutshell ;" and so I went on, describing the rest of his house-
hold stuff and provisions, after the same manner. For, although
the queen had ordered a little equipage of all things necessary
for me, while I was in her service, yet my ideas were wholly
taken up with what I saw on every side of me, and I winked at
my own littleness as people do at their own faults. The captain
understood my raillery very well, and merrily replied with the
old English proverb, that he doubted mine eyes were bigger
190
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
than my belly, for he did not observe my stomach so good, al·
though I had fasted all day; and, continuing in his mirth, pro-
tested, "he would have gladly given a hundred pounds to have
seen my closet in the eagle's bill, and afterwards in its fall from
so great a height into the sea: which would certainly have been
a most astonishing object, worthy to have the description of it
transmitted to future ages:" and the comparison of Phaëton
was so obvious, that he could not forbear applying it, although
I did not much admire the conceit.
The captain having been at Tonquin, was, in his return to
England, driven north-eastward to the latitude of 44 degrees, and
longitude of 143. But meeting a trade-wind two days after I
came on board him, we sailed southward a long time, and coast-
ing New Holland, kept our course west-south-west, and then
south-south-west, till we doubled the Cape of Good Hope. Our
voyage was very prosperous, but I shall not trouble the reader
with a journal of it. The captain called in at one or two ports,
and sent in his longboat for provisions and fresh water; but I
never went out of the ship till we came into the Downs, which
was on the third day of June, 1706, about nine months after my
escape. I offered to leave my goods in security for payment
of my freight, but the captain protested he would not receive
one farthing. We took a kind leave of each other, and I made
him promise he would come to see me at my house in Redriff.
I hired a horse and guide for five shillings, which I borrowed
of the captain.*
As I was on the road, observing the littleness of the houses,
the trees, the cattle, and the people, I began to think myself in
Lilliput. I was afraid of trampling on every traveller I met,
and often called aloud to them to have them stand out of the
This exquisitely simple incident will probably remind the reader of Campbell's descrip
tion of Commodore Byron:
In horrid climes, where Chilöe's tempests sweep
Tumultuous murmurs o'er the troubled deep,
'Twas his to mourn Misfortune's rudest shock;
Scourged by the winds and cradled on the rock,
To wake each joyous morn and search again
The famished haunts of solitary men,
Whose race unyielding as their native storm,
Know not a trace of nature but the form;
Yet at thy call the hardy tar pursued,
Pale, but intrepid, sad, but unsubdued,
Pierced the deep woods, and hailing from afar
The moon's pale planet and the northern star,
Paused at each dreary cry unheard before,
Hyenas in the wild, and mermaids on the shore;
Till led by Hope o'er many a cliff sublime,
He found a warmer world, a milder clime,
A home to rest, a shelter to defend,
Peace and repose, a Briton and a friend.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
191
way, so that I had like to have gotten one or two broken heads
for my impertinence.
When I came to my own house, for which I was forced to in-
quire, one of my servants opening the door, I bent down to go
in (like a goose under a gate), for fear of striking my head.
My wife ran out to embrace me, but I stooped lower than her
knees, thinking she could otherwise never be able to reach my
mouth. My daughter kneeled to ask my blessing, but I could
not see her till she arose, having been so long used to stand
with my head and eyes erect to above sixty feet; and then I
went to take her up with one hand by the waist. I looked down
upon the servants, and one or two friends who were in the house,
as if they had been pigmies, aud I a giant. I told my wife,
"she had been too thrifty, for I found she had starved herself
and her daughter to nothing." In short, I behaved myself so
unaccountably that they were all of the captain's opinion when
he first saw me, and concluded I had lost my wits. This I men-
tion as an instance of the great power of habit and prejudice.
In a little time, I and my family and friends came to a right
understanding: but my wife protested I should never go to sea
any more; although my evil destiny so ordered, that she had not
power to hinuer me, as the reader may know hereafter. In the
mean time, I here conclude the Second Part of my unfortunate
Voyages.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
THE LAMENTATION OF GLUMDALCLITCH
FOR THE LOSS OF GRILDRIG.
A Pastoral.
SOON as Glumdalclitch miss'd her pleasing care,
She wept, she blubber'd, and she tore her hair:
No British miss sincerer grief has known,
Her squirrel missing, or her sparrow flown.
She furl'd her sampler, and haul'd in her thread,
And stuck her necdle into Grildrig's bed,
Then spread her hands, and with a bounce let fall
Her baby, like the giant in Guildhall.
In peals of thunder now she roars--and now
She gently whimpers like a lowing cow;
Yet lovely in her sorrow still appears;
Her locks dishevelled, and her floods of tears
Seem like the iofty barn of some rich swain,
When from the thatch drips fast a shower of rain
In vain she searched each cranny of the house,
Each gaping chink impervious to a mouse.
"Was it for this," she cried, "with daily care,
Within thy reach I set the vinegar?
And fill'd the cruet with the acid tide,
While pepper-water-worms thy bait supplied,
Where twined the silver eel around thy hook,
And all the little monsters of the brook;
Sure in that lake he dropp'd:-my Grilly's drown .4*
She dragg'd the cruet, and no Grildrig's found.
"Vain is thy courage, Grilly, vain thy boast ;
But little creatures enterprise the most.
Trembling, I've seen thee dare the kitten's paw;
Nay, mix with children as they play'd at taw,
Nor fear the marbles as they bounding flew;
Marbles to them, but rolling rocks to you.
"Why did I trust thee with that giddy youth
Who from a page can ever learn the truth?
Versed in court-tricks, that money-loving boy,
To some lord's daughter sold the living toy;
Or rent him limb from limb in cruel play,
As children tear the wings of flies away
From place to place o'er Brobdingnag I'll roam,
And never will return; or bring thee home.
But who hath eyes to trace the passing wind?-
How, then, thy fairy footsteps can I find?
Dost thou, bewilder'd, wander all alone,
In the green thicket of a mossy stone?
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
193
Or tumbled from the toadstool's slippery round,
Perhaps all maim'd, lie grov'ling on the ground?
Dost thou, embosom'd in the lovely rose,
Or sunk within the peach's down, repose?
Within the kingcup, if thy limbs are spread,
Or in the golden cowslip's velvet head,
O show me, Flora, 'midst those sweets, the flower
Where sleeps my Grildrig in the fragrant bower!
"But ah! I fear thy little fancy roves
On little females, and on little loves;
Thy pigmy children, and thy tiny spouse;
The baby playthings that adorn thy house-
Doors, windows, chimneys, and the spacious rooms,
Equal in size to cells of honeycombs.
Hast thou for these now ventured from the shore,
Thy bark a bean-shell, and a straw thine oar?
Or in thy box, now bounding on the main-
Shall I ne'er bear thyself and house again?
And shall I set thee on my hand no more,
To see thee leap the lines, and traverse o'er
My spacious palm? Of stature scarce a span,
Mimic the actions of a real man?
No more behold thee turn my watch's key,
As seamen at a capstan anchors weigh!
"How wert thou wont to walk with cautious tread
A dish of tea, like milk-pail, on thy head?
How chase the mite that bore thy cheese away,
And keep the rolling magot at a bay!"
at
She spoke, but broken accents stopp'd her voice,
Soft as the speaking-trumpet's mellow noise;
She sobb'd a storm, and wiped her flowing eyes,
Which seem'd like two broad suns in misty skies:
O squander not thy grief,-those tears command,
To weep upon our cod in Newfoundland;
The plenteous pickle shall preserve the fish,
And Europe taste thy sorrows in her dish.
13
A VOYAGE TO
LAPUTA, BALNIBARBI, LUGGNAGG, GLUB
BDUBDRIB AND JAPAN.*
CHAPTER I.
THE AUTHOR SETS OUT ON HIS THIRD VOYAGE-IS TAKEN BY
PIRATES-THE MALICE OF A DUTCHMAN-HIS ARRIVAL AT
AN ISLAND-HE IS RECEIVED IN LAPUTA.
I HAD not been at home above ten days, when Captain
William Robinson, a Cornishman, commander of the Hope-
well, a stout ship of three hundred tons, came to my house.
I had formerly been surgeon of another ship, where he was
master and fourth part owner, in a voyage to the Levant. He
had always treated me more like a brother than an inferior
officer; and hearing of my arrival, made me a visit, as I ap-
prehended only out of friendship, for nothing passed more
than what is usual after long absences. But repeating his
visits often, expressing his joy to find me in good health, ask-
ing, "whether I was not settled for life?" adding "that he
intended a voyage to the East Indies in about two months," at
last he plainly invited me, though with many apologies, to be
surgeon of the ship; "that I should have another surgeon
under me, beside our two mates; that my salary should be
doubled to the usual pay; and that having experienced my
knowledge in sea affairs to be at least equal to his, he would
enter into any engagement to follow my advice, as much as if
I had shared in the command."
Why
* Dean Swift seems to have borrowed several hints in his Voyage to Laputa, from a
novel written by the learned Dr. Francis Godwin, Bishop of Llandaff, called "The Man in
the Moon, or a Discourse of a Voyage thither, by Domingo Gonsales, 1638," Svo. This
philosophic romance, which has been several times printed, shows that Bishop Godwin had
a creative genius. His "Nuncius Inanimatus," which contains instructions to convey
secret intelligence, is very scarce. He died in April, 1633. This romance is published in
the eight volume of the Harleian Miscellanies, and is a very ingenious fiction, but it does
not bear the slightest resemblance to the Voyage to Lapuțą.
(100)
190
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
He said so many other obliging things, and I knew him to
be so honest a man, that I could not reject his proposal; the
thirst I had of seeing the world, notwithstanding my past mis-
fortunes, continuing as violent as ever. The only difficulty that
remained, was to persuade my wife, whose consent however I
at last obtained, by the prospect of advantage she proposed to
her children.
We set out on the 5th day of August, 1706, and arrived at
Fort St. George* the 11th of April, 1707. We stayed there
three weeks to refresh our crew, many of whom were sick.
From thence we went to Tonquin, where the captain resolved
to continue some time, because many of the goods he intended
to buy were not ready, nor could he expect to be dispatched
in several months. Therefore, in hopes to defray some of the
charges he must be at, he bought a sloop, loaded with several
sorts of goods, wherewith the Tonquinese usually trade to the
neighboring islands, and putting fourteen men on board, whereof
three were of the country, he appointed me master of the sloop,.
and gave me power to traffic, while he transacted his affairs at
Tonquin.
We had not sailed above three days, when a great storm
arising, we were driven five days to the north-north-east, and
then to the east: after which we had fair weather, but still
with a pretty strong gale from the west. Upon the tenth day
we were chased by two pirates, who soon overtook us; for my
sloop was so deep laden, that she sailed very slow, neither
were we in a condition to defend ourselves. We were boarded
about the same time by both the pirates, who entered furiously
at the head of their men; but finding us all prostrate upon
our faces (for so I gave order), they pinioned us with strong
ropes, and setting a guard upon us, went to search the sloop.
I observed among them a Dutchman, who seemed to be of
some authority, though he was not commander of either ship.
He knew us by our countenances to be Englishmen, and jab-
bering to us in our own language, swore we should be tied back
to back and thrown into the sea. I spoke Dutch tolerably
well; I told him whom we were, and begged him, in considera-
tion of our being Christians and Protestants, of neighboring
countries in strict alliance, that he would move the captains to
take some pity on us. This inflamed his rage; he repeated
the threatenings, and turning to his companions, spoke with
great vehemence in the Japanese language, as I suppose, often
using the word Christianos.
* Now Madras.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
197
The largest of the two pirate ships was commanded by a
Japanese captain who spoke a little Dutch, but very imperfectly.
He came up to me, and after several questions, which I an-
swered in great humility, he said,
،، we should not die." I
made the captain a very low bow, and then turning to the
Dutchman, said, "I was sorry to find more mercy in a Heathen
than in a brother Christian." But I had soon reason to repent
those foolish words: for that malicious reprobate, having often
endeavored in vain to persuade both the captains that I might
be thrown into the sea (which they would not yield to, after
the promise made me that I should not die), however prevailed
so far, as to have a punishment inflicted on me, worse, in all
human appearance, than death itself. My men were sent by
an equal division into both the pirate ships, and my sloop new
manned. As to myself, it was determined that I should be set
adrift in a small canoe, with paddles and a sail, and four days'
provisions; which last, the Japanese captain was so kind as to
double out of his own stores, and would permit no man to
search me. I got down into the canoe, while the Dutchman,
standing upon the deck, loaded me with all the curses and in-
jurious terms his language could afford.
About an hour before we saw the pirates, I had taken an
observation, and found we were in the latitude of 46 N. and
longitude of 183. When I was at some distance from the
pirates, I discovered by my pocket-glass, several islands to the
south-east. I set up my sail, the wind being fair, with a design
to reach the nearest of those islands, which I made a shift to
do, in about three hours. It was all rocky: however I got
many birds' eggs; and striking fire, I kindled some heath and
dry seaweed, by which I roasted my eggs. I ate no other
supper, being resolved to spare my provisions as much as I
could. I passed the night under the shelter of a rock, strewing
some heath under me, and slept pretty well. The next day I
sailed to another island, and thence to a third and fourth,
sometimes using my sail, and sometimes my paddles. But not
to trouble the reader with a particular account of my distresses,
let it suffice, that on the fifth day I arrived at the last island in
my sight, which lay south-south-east to the former.
This island was at a greater distance than I expected, and
I did not reach it in less than five hours. I encompassed it
almost round, before I could find a convenient place to land in;
which was a small creek, about three times the wideness of my
canoe. I found the island to be ail rocky, only a little i
mingled with tufts of grass, and sweet-smelling herbs.
1L008
•
198
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
out my small provisions, and after having refreshed myself, I
secured the remainder in a cave, whereof there were great
numbers; I gathered plenty of eggs upon the rocks, and got a
quantity of dry seaweed and parched grass, which I designed
to kindle the next day, and roast my eggs as well as I could,
for I had about me my flint, steel, match, and burning-glass. I
lay all night in the cave where I had lodged my provisions. My
bed was the same dry grass and seaweed which I intended for
fuel. I slept very little, for the disquiets of my mind prevailed
over my weariness, and kept me awake. I considered how
impossible it was to preserve my life in so desolate a place, and
how miserable my end must be: yet found myself so listless
and desponding, that I had not the heart to rise; and before
I could get spirits enough to creep out of my cave, the day was
far advanced. I walked awhile among the rocks: the sky was
perfectly clear, and the sun so hot, that I was forced to turn
my face from it; when all on a sudden it became obscure, as I
thought, in a manner very different from what happens by the
interposition of a cloud. I turned back, and perceived a vast
opaque body between me and the sun, moving forwards towards
the island; it seemed to be about two miles high, and hid the
sun six or seven minutes; but I did not observe the air to be
colder, or the sky more darkened, than if I had stood under
the shade of a mountain. As it approached nearer over the
place where I was, it appeared to be a firm substance, the bot
tom flat, smooth, and shining very bright, from the reflection of
the sea below. I stood upon a height about two hundred
yards from the shore, and saw this vast body descending almost
to a parallel with me, at less than an English mile distance.
I took out my pocket perspective, and could plainly discover
numbers of people moving up and down the sides of it, which
appeared to be sloping; but what those people were doing I
was not able to distinguish.
The natural love of life gave me some inward motion of joy,
and I was ready to entertain a hope that this adventure might,
some way or other, help to deliver me from the desolate place and
condition I was in. But at the same time, the reader can hardly
conceive my astonishment, to behold an island in the air, in
habited by men, who were able (as it should seem) to rise or
sink, or put it into progressive motion, as they pleased. But
not being at that time in a disposition to philosophize upon
this phenomenon, I rather chose what course the island would
take, because it seemed for awhile to stand still. Yet soon
after, it advanced nearer, and I could see the sides of it encom
•
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS,
199
passed with several gradations of galleries, and stairs at certain
intervals to descend from one to the other. In the lowest gallery,
I beheld some people fishing with long angling-rods, and others
looking on. I waved my cap (for my hat was long since worn
out) and my handkerchief towards the island; and upon its
nearer approach, I called and shouted with the utmost strength
of voice: and then looking circumspectly, I beheld a crowd
gathered to that side which was most in my view. I found by
their pointing toward me and to each other, that they plainly
discovered me, although they made no return to my shouting.
But I could see four or five men running in great haste up the
stairs, to the top of the island, who then disappeared. I hap-
pened rightly to conjecture, that these were sent for orders, to
some person in authority, upon this occasion.
47090
The number of people increased, and in less than half an
hour the island was moved, and raised in such a manner, that
the lowest gallery appeared in a parallel of less than a hundred
yards' distance from the height where I stood. I then put
myself in the most supplicating postures, and spoke in the
humblest accent, but received no answer. Those who stood
nearest over against me, seemed to be persons of distinction,
as I supposed by their habit. They conferred earnestly with
each other, looking often upon me. At length one of them
called out in a clear, polite, smooth dialect, not unlike in sound
to the Italian: and therefore I returned an answer in that
language, hoping at least that the cadence might be more
agreeable to his ears. Although neither of us understood the
other, yet my meaning was easily known, for the people saw the
distress I was in.
They made signs for me to come down from the rock, and
go towards the shore, which I accordingly did; and the flying
island being raised to a convenient height, the verge directly
over me, a chain was let down from the lowest gallery, with a
seat fastened to the bottom, to which I fixed myself, and was
drawn up by pulleys.
$
800
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
CHAPTER II.
THE HUMORS AND DISPOSITIONS OF THE LAPUTIANS DESCRIBED-
AN ACCOUNT OF THEIR LEARNING OF THE KING AND HIS
COURT-THE AUTHOR'S RECEPTION THERE THE INHABI-
TANTS SUBJECT TO FEAR AND DISQUIETUDES-AN ACCOUNT
OF THE WOMEN.
S
*
Ar my alighting, I was surrounded with a crowd of people,
but those who stood nearest seemed to be of better quality.
They behold me with all the marks and circumstances of wonder,
neither indeed was I much in their debt; having never till then
seen a race of mortals so singular in their shapes, habits, and
countenances. Their heads where all reclined, either to the
right or the left; one of their eyes turned inward, and the other
directly up to the zenith.* Their outward garments were
adorned with the figures of suns, moons, and stars; interwoven
with those of fiddles, flutes, harps, trumpets, guitars, harpsi-
chords, and many instruments of music, unknown to us in Europe.
I observed, here and there, many in the habit of servants, with a
blown bladder, fastened like a flail to the end of a stick, which
they carried in their hands. In each bladder was a small
quantity of dried peas, or little pebbles, as I was afterwards
informed. With these bladders they now and then flapped the
mouths and ears of those who stood near them, of which practice
I could not then conceive the meaning. It seems the minds
of these people are so taken up wh intense speculations, that
they neither can speak, nor attend to the discourses of others,
without being roused by some external action upon the organs
of speech and hearing: for which reason, those persons who are
able to afford it always keep a flapper (the original is climenole),
in their family, as one of their domestics; nor ever walk abroad,
or make visits, without him. And the business of this officer
is, when two, three, or more persons are in company, gently to
strike with his bladder the mouth of him who is to speak, and
the right ear of him or them to whom the speaker addresses
himself. This flapper is likewise employed diligently to attend.
his master in his walks, and upon occasion to give him a soft
flap on his eyes; because he is always so wrapped up in cogi-
* By this description the author intended to ridicule those who waste life in speculative
sciences, the powers of whose minds are as absurdly employed as the eyes of the Laputians.
-Hawkesworth.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
201
tation, that he is in manifest danger of falling down every
precipice, and bouncing his head against every post: and in
the streets, of jostling others, or being jostled himself into the
kennel.
It was necessary to give the reader this information, with-
out which he would be at the same loss with me to understand
the proceedings of these people, as they conducted me up the
stairs to the top of the island, and from thence to the royal
palace. While we were ascending they forgot several times.
what they were about, and left me to myself, till their memories
were again roused by their flappers: for they appeared alto-
gether unmoved by the sight of my foreign habit and counte
nance, and by the shouts of the vulgar, whose thoughts and
minds were more disengaged.
At last we entered the palace, and proceeded into the cham-
ber of presence, where I saw the king seated on his throne,
attended on each side by persons of prime quality. Before
the throne was a large table filled with globes and spheres,
and mathematical instruments of all kinds. His majesty took
not the least notice of us, although our entrance was not with-
out sufficient noise, by the concourse of all persons belonging
to the court. But he was then deep in a problem; and we
attended at least an hour, before he could solve it. There
stood by him, on each side, a young page with flaps in their
hands, and when they saw he was at leisure, one of them gently
struck his mouth, and the other his right ear: at which he
startled like one awaked on the sudden, and looking towards
me and the company I was in, recollected the occasion of our
coming, whereof he had been informed before.
He spoke
some words, whereupon immediately a young man with a flap
came up to my side, and flapped me gently on the right ear;
but I made signs, as well as I could, that I had no occasion
for such an instrument; which, as I afterwards found, gave his
majesty, and the whole court, a very mean opinion of my un-
derstanding. The king, as far as I could conjecture, asked
me several questions, and I addressed myself to him in all the
languages I had. When it was found I could neither under-
stand, nor be understood, I was conducted by his order to an
apartment in his palace (this prince being distinguished above
all his predecessors for his hospitality to strangers), where two
servants were appointed to attend me. My dinner was brought,
and four persons of quality, whom I remembered to have seen
very near the king's person, did me the honor to dine with me.
We had two courses, of three dishes each. In the first course,
202
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
there was a shoulder of mutton cut into an equilateral triangle,
a piece of beef into a rhomboides, and a pudding into a cycloid.
The second course was two ducks trussed up in the forms of
fiddles; sausages and puddings resembling flutes and hautboys,
and a breast of veal in the shape of a harp. The servants cut
our bread into cones, cylinders, parallelograms, and several
other mathematical figures.
While we were at dinner, I made bold to ask the names of
several things in their language, and those noble persons, by
the assistance of their flappers, delighted to give me answers,
hoping to raise my admiration of their great abilities, if I could
be brought to converse with them. I was soon able to call for
bread and drink, or whatever else I wanted.
After dinner, my company withdrew, and a person was sent
to me by the king's order, attended by a flapper. He brought
with him, pen, ink, and paper, and three or four books, giving
me to understand by signs, that he was sent to teach me the
language. We sat together four hours, in which time I wrote
down a great number of words in columns, with the transla-
tions over against them: I likewise made a shift to learn
several short sentences, for my tutor would order one of my
servants to fetch something, to turn about, to make a bow, to
sit, or to stand, to walk, and the like. Then I took down the
sentence in writing. He showed me also, in one of his books,
the figures of the sun, moon, and stars, the zodiac, the tropics,
and polar circles, together with the denominations of many
planes and solids. He gave me the names and descriptions of
all the musical instruments, and the general terms of art in
playing on each of them. After he had left me, I placed all
my words, with their interpretations, in alphabetical order.
And thus, in a few days, by the help of a very faithful memory,
I got some insight into their language.
The word, which I interpret the flying or floating island, is
in the original Laputa, whereof I could never learn the true
etymology Lap, in the old obsolete language, signifies high;
and untuh, a governor; from which they say, by corruption, was
derived. Laputa from Lapuntuh. But I do not approve of this
derivation, which seems to be a little strained. I ventured to
offer to the learned among them a conjecture of my own, that
Laputa was quasi lap outed; lap, signifying properly, the dancing
of the sunbeams in the sea, and outed, a wing; which, however,
I shall not obtrude, but submit to the judicious reader.*
This amusing burlesque on philology was probably directed against Dr. Bentley, and
is scarcely an exaggeration of some of his derivations.
,
.
CULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
203
Those to whom the king had intrusted me, observed how
ill I was clad, ordered a tailor to come next morning, and take
measure for a suit of clothes. This operator did his office
after a different manner from those of his trade in Europe.
He first took my altitude by a quadrant, and then, with rule
and compasses, described the dimensions and outlines of my
whole body, all which he entered upon paper; and in six days
brought my clothes very ill made, and quite out of shape, by
happening to mistake a figure in the calculation. But my com-
fort was, that I observed such accidents very frequent, and
little regarded.*
During my confinement for want of clothes, and by an in-
disposition that held me some days longer, I much enlarged
my dictionary; and when I next went to court, was able to
understand many things the king spoke, and to return him
some kind of answers. His majesty had given orders, that the
island should move north-east-and-by-east to the vertical point
over Lagado, the metropolis of the whole kingdom below, upon
the firm earth. It was about ninety leagues distant, and our
voyage lasted four days and a half. I was not in the least
sensible of the progressive motion made in the air by the
island. On the second morning, about eleven o'clock, the
king himself in person, attended by his nobility, courtiers, and
officers, having prepared all their musical instruments, played
on them for three hours without intermission, so that I was
quite stunned with the noise: neither could I possibly guess
the meaning, till my tutor informed me. He said, "that the
people of their island had their ears adapted to hear the music
of the spheres, which always played at certain periods, and the
court was now prepared to bear their part, in whatever instru-
ment they most excelled." †
In our journey towards Lagado, the capital city, his majesty
ordered that the island should stop over certain towns and
villages, from whence he might receive the petitions of his sub-
jects. And to this purpose several packthreads were let down,
with small weights at the bottom. On these pack threads the
people strung their petitions, which mounted up directly, like
the scraps of paper fastened by schoolboys at the end of the
It is generally supposed that Swift alludes here to an error made by Sir Isaac New
ton's printer, who by adding a cipher to the distance of the earth from the sun caused not a
little ridicule to be thrown on the philosopher's astronomical calculations.
Swift's want of taste for music is mentioned by most of his biographers. He wrote a
cantata to ridicule the fashionable style of his own day, which seems to prove, not that he
disliked music of itself, but that he was averse to the affectation and jargon of scientific pro
Jansors.
204
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
string that holds their kite. Sometimes we received wine and
victuals from below, which were drawn up by pulley.
',
The knowledge I had in mathematics gave me great assist-
ance in acquiring their phraseology, which depended much
upon that science, and music; and in the latter I was not un-
skilled. Their ideas are perpetually conversant in lines and
figures. If they would, for example, praise the beauty of a
woman, or any other animal, they describe it by rhombs, circles,
parallelograms, ellipses, and other geometrical terms, or by
words of art drawn from music, needless here to repeat. I
observed in the king's kitchen all sorts of mathematical and
musical instruments, after the figures of which they cut up
joints that were served to his majesty's table.
the
Their houses are very ill-built, the walls bevel, without one
right angle in any apartment: and this defect arises from the
contempt they bear to practical geometry, which they despise
as vulgar and mechanic: those instructions they give being too
refined for the intellects of their workmen, which occasions
perpetual mistakes. And although they are dexterous enough
upon a piece of paper, in the management of the rule, the pen-
cil, and the divider, yet in the common actions and behavior
of life, I have not seen a more clumsy, awkward, and unhandy
people, nor so slow and perplexed in their conceptions upon
all other subjects, except those of mathematics and music.
They are very bad reasoners, and vehemently given to opposi
tion, unless when they happen to be of the right opinion, which
is seldom their case. Imagination, fancy, and invention, they
are wholly strangers to, nor have any-words in their language
by which those ideas can be expressed; the whole compass of
their thoughts and minds being shut up within the two fore
mentioned sciences.
Most of them, and especially those who deal in the astro-
nomical part, have great faith in judicial astrology, although
they are ashamed to own it publicly. But what I chiefly ad-
mired, and thought altogether unaccountable, was the strong
disposition I observed in them towards news and politics, per-
petually inquiring into public affairs, giving their judgments in
matters of state, and passionately disputing every inch of a
party opinion. I have indeed observed the same disposition.
among most of the mathematicians I have known in Europe,
although I could never discover the least analogy between the
two sciences; unless those people suppose, that because the
smallest circle has as many degrees as the largest, therefore the
regulation and management of the world require no more abili
GÚLLIVER'S TRAVELS.
203
es than the handling and turning of a globe: but I rather
take this quality to spring from a very common infirmity of
human nature, inclining us to be most curious and conceited in
matters where we have least concern, and for which we are at
least adapted by study or nature.
These people are under continual disquietudes, never enjoy-
ing a minute's peace of mind: and their disturbances proceed
from causes which very little affect the rest of mortals. Their
apprehensions arise from several changes they dread in the
celestial bodies: for instance, that the earth, by the continual
approaches of the sun towards it, must, in course of time, be
absorbed, or swallowed up; that the face of the sun will, by de-
grees, be incrusted with its own effluvia, and give no more light
to the world; that the earth very narrowly escaped a brush
from the tail of the last comet, which would have infallibly re-
duced it to ashes; and that the next, which they have calcu-
lated for one-and-thirty years hence, will probably destroy us.
For if, in its perihelion, it should approach within a certain de-
gree of the sun (as by their calculations they have reason to
dread), it will receive a degree of heat ten thousand times more
intense than that of red-hot glowing iron; and, in its absence
from the sun, carrying a blazing tail ten hundred thousand and
fourteen miles long, through which, if the earth should pass at
the distance of one hundred thousand miles from the nucleus,
or main body of the comet, it must in its passage be set on fire,
and reduced to ashes; that the sun, daily spending its rays
without any nutriment to supply them, will at last be wholly
consumed and annihilated; which must be attended with the
destruction of this earth, and of all the planets that receive their
light from it.*
هده
* Many such theories have been proposed by persons eminent in their day for mathe
matical knowledge. The supposition that all the bodies in the universe are approaching a
common centre, where they will meet and crush each other to chaos, is magnificently set
forth in the following lines from Darwin's "Botanic Garden:
""
Roll on, ye stars, exult in youthful prime;
Mark with bright curves the printless steps of time
-Near and more near your beamy cars approach,
And lessening orbs on lessening orbs encroach.
Flowers of the sky! ye too to age shall yield,
Frail as your silken sisters of the field;
Star after star from Heaven's high arch shall rush,
Suns sink on suns, and systems systems crush.
Headlong, extinct to one dark centre fall,
And death and night and chaos mingle all,
Till overhead, emerging from the storm,
Primeval nature lifts her changeful form,
Mounts from her funeral pyre on wings of flame,
And soars and shines, another and the same.
The fallacy of the theory has, however, been demonstrated, and the phenomena by which
seemed to be supported have been satisfactorily explained.
206
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
They are so perpetually alarmed with the apprehensions of
these, and the like impending dangers, that they can neither
sleep quietly in their beds, nor have any relish for the common.
pleasures and amusements of life. When they meet an acquaint-
ance in the morning, the first question is about the sun's health,
how he looked at his setting and rising, and what hopes they
have to avoid the stroke of the approaching_comet.* This
conversation they are apt to run into with the same temper that
boys discover in delighting to hear terrible stories of spirits and
hobgoblins, which they greedily listen to, and dare not go to
bed for fear,
The women of the island have abundance of vivacity; they
contemn their husbands, and are exceedingly fond of strangers:
whereof there is always a considerable number from the conti-
nent below, attending at court, either upon affairs of the several
towns and corporations, or their own particular occasions, but
are much despised, because they want the same endowments.
Among these, the ladies choose their gallants; but the vexation
is, that they act with too much ease and security; for the hus-
band is always so wrapped in speculation, that the mistress and
lover may proceed to the greatest familiarities before his face,
if he be but provided with paper and implements, and without
his flapper at his side.
The wives and daughters lament their confinement to the
island, although I think it the most delicious spot of ground in
the world and although they live here in the greatest plenty and
magnificence, and are allowed to do whatever they please, they
long to see the world, and take the diversions of the metropolis;
which they are not allowed to do without a particular license
from the king; and this is not easy to be obtained, because the
people of quality have found, by frequent experience, how hard
it is to persuade their women to return from below. I was told,
that a great court lady, who had several children,-is married
to the prime minister, the richest subject in the kingdom, a very
graceful person, extremely fond of her, and lives in the finest
palace in the island,-went down to Lagado on the pretence of
health, there hid herself for several months, till the king sent a
warrant to search for her; and she was found in an obscure eating
house all in rags, having pawned her clothes to maintain an old
deformed footman, who beat her every day, and in whose com-
pany she was taken, much against her will. And although her
* The dread of comets continued even amongst the learned to a very late period. It is
new generally known that the density of these bodies is very small, and consequently, that
a stroke from one of them would probably not produce inuch mischief.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
267
husband received her with all possible kindness, and without
the least reproach, she soon after contrived to steal down again,
with all her jewels, to the same gallant, and has not been heard
of since.
ट
This may perhaps pass with the reader rather for an Euro-
pean or English story, than for one of a country so remote. But
he may please to consider, that the caprices of womankind are
not limited by any climate or nation, and that they are much
more uniform than can be easily imagined.
In about a month's time, I had made a tolerable proficiency
in their language, and was able to answer most of the king's
questions, when I had the honor to attend him. His majesty
discovered not the least curiosity to inquire into the laws, gov
ernment, history, religion, or manners of the countries where I
had been; but confined his questions to the state of mathe-
matics, and received the account I gave him with great con-
tempt and indifference, though often roused by his flapper on
each side.
CHAPTER III.
A PHENOMENON SOLVED BY MODERN PHILOSOPHY AND ASTRON-
OMY-THE LAPUTIANS' GREAT IMPROVEMENTS IN THE LATTER
THE KING'S METHOD OF SUPPRESSING INSURRECTIONS.
JEALOUSY of foreigners is so common everywhere, that be-
fore making any researches, I requested leave of the prince to
see the curiosities of the island, which he was graciously pleased
to grant, and ordered my tutor to attend me. I chiefly wanted
to know, to what cause in art or in nature it owed its several
motions, whereof I will now give a philosophical account to the
reader.
The flying or floating island is exactly circular, its diameter
7837 yards, or about four miles and a half, and consequently
contains ten thousand acres. It is three hundred yards thick.
The bottom or under surface, which appears to those who view
it below, is one even regular plate of adamant, shooting up to
the height of about two hundred yards. Above it lie the sev-
eral minerals in their usual order, and over all is a coat of rich
mould, ten or twelve feet deep. The declivity of the upper
208
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
surface, from the circumference to the centre, is the natural
cause why all the dews and rains which fall upon the island are
conveyed in small rivulets towards the middle, where they are
cmptied into four large basins, each of about half a mile in cir-
cuit, and two hundred yards distant from the centre. From these
basins the water is continually exhaled by the sun in the day-
time, which effectually prevents their overflowing. Besides, as
it is in the power of the monarch to raise the island above the
region of clouds and vapors, he can prevent the falling of dews
and rain whenever he pleases. For the highest clouds cannot
rise above two miles, as naturalists agree; at least they were
never known to do so in that country.
At the centre of the island there is a chasm about fifty yards
in diameter, whence the astronomers descend into a large dome,
which is therefore called flandona gagnole, or the astronomer's
cave, situated at the depth of a hundred yards beneath the sur-
face of the adamant. In this cave are twenty lamps, continually
burning, which, from the reflection of the adamant, cast a strong
light into every part. The place is stored with great variety of
sextants, quadrants, telescopes, astrolabes, and other astronom-
ical instruments. But the greatest curiosity, upon which the
fate of the island depends, is a loadstone of a prodigious size,
in shape resembling a weaver's shuttle. It is in length six
yards, and in the thickest part at least three yards over. This
magnet is sustained by a very strong axle of adamant passing
through its middle, upon which it plays, and is poised so ex-
actly that the weakest hand can turn it. It is hooped round
with a hollow cylinder of adamant, four feet deep, as many
thick, and twelve yards in diameter, placed horizontally, and
supported by eight 'adamantine feet, each six yards high. In
the middle of the concave side there is a groove twelve inches
deep, in which the extremities of the axle are lodged, and
turned round as there is occasion.
The stone cannot be moved from its place by any force,
because the hoop and its feet are one continued piece with that
body of adamant which constitutes the bottom of the island.
By means of this loadstone, the island is made to rise and
fall, and move from one place to another. For, with respect
to that part of the earth over which the monarch presides, the
stone is endued at one of its sides with an attractive power,
and at the other with a repulsive. Upon placing the magnet
erect, with its attracting end towards the earth, the island de-
scends; but when the repelling extremity points downwards,
the island mounts directly upwards. When the position of the
GULLIVERS IR
209
stone is oblique, the motion of the island is so too: for, in this
magnet, the forces always act in lines parallel to its direction.
By this oblique motion the island is conveyed to different
parts of the monarch's dominions. To explain the manner of
its progress, let A B represent a line drawn across the domin-
ions of Balnibarbi, let the line C D represent the loadstone, of
which let D be the repelling end, and c the attracting end, the
island being over c: let the stone be placed in position C D,
with its repelling end downwards; then the island will be driven
upwards obliquely towards D. When it is arrived at D, let the
stone be turned upon its axle, till its attracting end points to-
wards E, and then the island will be carried obliquely towards
E; where, if the stone be again turned upon its axle till it stands
in the position E F, with its repelling point downwards, the
islands will rise obliquely towards F, where, by directing the
attracting end towards G, the island may be carried to G, and
from G to H, by turning the stone so as to make its repelling ex-
tremity point directly downward. And thus, by changing the
situation of the stone, as often as there is occasion, the island
is made to rise and fall by turns in an oblique direction, and by
those alternate risings and fallings (the obliquity being not con-
siderable) is conveyed from one part of the dominions to the
other.
But it must be observed, that this island cannot move be-
yond the extent of the dominions below, nor can it rise above
the height of four miles. For which the astronomers (who have
written large systems concerning the stone) assign the follow-
ing reason that the magnetic virtue does not extend beyond the
distance of four miles, and that the mineral, which acts upon
the stone in the bowels of the earth, and in the sea about six
leagues distant from the shore, is not diffused through the
whole globe, but terminated with the limits of the king's domin-
ions; and it was easy, from the great advantage of such a su-
perior situation, for a prince to bring under his obedience what-
ever country lay within the attraction of that magnet.
When the stone is put parallel to the plane of the horizon,
the island stands still; for in that case the extremities of it
being at equal distance from the earth, act with equal force, the
one in drawing downwards, the other in pushing upwards, and
consequently no motion can ensue.
This loadstone is under the care of certain astronomers,
who from time to time, give it such positions as the monarch
directs. They spend the greatest part of their lives in observ-
ing the celestial bodies, which they do by the assistance of
210
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
glasses, far excelling ours in goodness. For, although their
largest telescopes do not exceed three feet, they magnify much
more than those of a hundred with us, and show the stars with
greater clearness. This advantage has enabled them to extend
their discoveries much farther than our astronomers in Europe;
for they have made a catalogue of ten thousand fixed stars,
whereas the largest of ours do not contain above one-third part
of that number. They have likewise discovered two lesser stars,
or satellites, which revolve about Mars; whereof the innermost
is distant from the centre of the primary planet exactly three
of his diameters, and the outermost, five: the former revolves
in the space of ten hours, and the latter in twenty-one and a
half; so that the squares of their periodical times are very near
in the same proportion with the cubes of their distance, from
the centre of Mars; which evidently shows them to be gov-
erned by the same law of gravitation that influences the other
heavenly bodies.
They have observed ninety-three different comets, and set-
tled their periods with great exactness. If this be true (and
they affirm it with great confidence), it is much to be wished
that their observations were made public, whereby the theory
of comets, which at present is very lame and defective, might be
brought to the same perfection with other parts of astronomy.
The king would be the most absolute prince in the uni
verse, if he could but prevail on a ministry to join with him,
but these, having their estates below on the continent, and con-
sidering that the office of a favorite has a very uncertain ten-
ure, would never consent to the enslaving of their country.
If any town should engage in rebellion or mutiny, fall into
violent factions, or refuse to pay the usual tribute, the king
has two methods of reducing them to obedience. The first and
the mildest course is, by keeping the island hovering over such
a town, and the lands about it, whereby he can deprive them
of the benefit of the sun and the rain, and consequently afflict
the inhabitants with dearth and diseases; and if the crime de-
serve it, they are at the same time pelted from above with great
stones, against which they have no defence but by creeping
into cellars or caves, while the roofs of their houses are beaten
to pieces. But if they still continue obstinate, or offer to raise
insurrections, he proceeds to the last remedy, by letting the
island drop directly upon their heads, which makes an univer-
sal destruction both of houses and men. However, this is an
extremity to which the prince is seldom driven, neither indeed
is he willing to put it in execution; nor dare his ministers ad
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
ZIF
vise him to an action, which, as it would render them odious to
the people, so it would be a great damage to their own estates,
which lie all below; for the island is the king's demesne.
But there is still indeed a more weighty reason, why the
kings of this country have been always averse from executing
so terrible an action, unless upon the utmost necessity. For, if
the town intended to be destroyed should have in it any tall
rocks, as it generally falls out in the larger cities, a situation
probably chosen at first with a view to prevent such a catas
trophe; or if it abound in high spires, or pillars of stone, a sud
den fall might endanger the bottom or under surface of the
island, which, although it consist, as I have said, of one entire
adamant, two hundred yards thick, might happen to crack by
too great a shock, or burst by approaching too near the fires
from the houses below, as the backs, both of iron and stone,
will often do in our chimneys. Of all this the people are well ap-
prized, and understand how far to carry their obstinacy, where
their liberty or property is concerned. And the king, when he is
highest provoked, and most determined to press a city to rub-
bish, orders the island to descend with great gentleness, out of
a pretence of tenderness to his people, but, indeed, for fear
of breaking the adamantine bottom; in which case, it is the
opinion of all their philosophers, that the loadstone could no
longer hold it up, and the whole mass would fall to the ground.
By a fundamental law of this realm, neither the king, nor
either of his two elder sons, are permitted to leave the island ·
nor the queen, till she is past childbearing.
CHAPTER IV.
THE AUTHOR LEAVES LAPUTA-IS CONVEYED TO BALNIBARBI
-ARRIVES AT THE METROPOLIS-A DESCRIPTION OF THE
METROPOLIS, AND THE COUNTRY ADJOINING THE AUTHOR
HOSPITABLY RECEIVED BY A GREAT LORD-HIS CONVERSA-
TION WITH THAT LORD.
QUITE unwilling to declare that I was ill treated in this
island, yet I must confess I thought myself too much neglected,
not without some degree of contempt; for neither prince nor
people appeared to be curious in any part of knowledge, except
mathematics and music, wherein I was far their inferior, and
upon that account very little regarded. On the other side, after
212
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
having seen all the curiosities of the island, I was very desirous
to leave it, being heartily weary of those people. They were
indeed excellent in two sciences for which I have great esteem,
and wherein I am not unversed; but at the same time, so ab-
stracted and involved in speculation, that I never met with
such disagreeable companions. I conversed only with women,
tradesmen, flappers, and court-pages, during two months of my
abode there, by which, at last, I rendered myself extremely
contemptible; yet these were the only people from whom I could
ever receive a reasonable answer.
I had obtained, by hard study, a good degree of knowledge
in their language: I was weary of being confined to an island,
where I received so little countenance, and resolved to leave it
with the first opportunity. There was a great lord at court,
nearly related to the king, and for that reason alone, used with
respect. He was universally reckoned the most ignorant and
stupid person among them. He had performed many eminent
services for the crown, had great natural and acquired parts,
adorned with integrity and honor; but so ill an ear for music,
that his detractors reported, "he had been often known to beat
time in the wrong place; neither could his tutors, without
extreme difficulty, teach him to demonstrate the most easy
proposition in the mathematics. He was pleased to show me
many marks of favor, often did me the honor of a visit, desired
to be informed in the affairs of Europe, the laws and customs,
the manners and learning of the several countries where I had
travelled. He listened to me with great attention, and made
very wise observations on all I spoke. He had two flappers
attending him for state, but never made use of them, except at
court and in visits of ceremony; and would always command
them to withdraw, when we were alone together.
I entreated this illustrious person to intercede in my behalf
with his majesty, for leave to depart; which he accordingly did,
as he was pleased to teil me, with regret; for indeed he had
made me several offers, very advantageous, which, however, I
refused, with expressions of the highest acknowledgment.
On the 16th of February, I took leave of his majesty and
the court. The king made me a present to the value of about
two hundred pounds English, and my protector, his kinsman,
as much more, together with a letter of recommendation to a
friend of his in Lagado, the metropolis: the island being then
hovering over a mountain about two miles from it, I was let
down from the lowest gallery, in the same manner as I had
been taken up.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
213
The continent, as far as it is subject to the monarch of the
flying island, passes under the general name of Balnibarbi;
and the metropolis, as I said before, is called Lagado. I felt
some little satisfaction in finding myself on firm ground. I
walked to the city without any concern, being clad like one of
the natives, and sufficiently instructed to converse with them.
I soon found out the person's house to whom I was recom-
mended, presented my letter from his friend the grandee in the
island, and was received with much kindness. This great lord,
whose name was Munodi, ordered me an apartment in his own
house, where I continued during my stay, and was entertained
in a most hospitable manner.
The next morning after my arrival, he took me in his chariot
to see the town, which is about half the bigness of London ;
but the houses very strangely built, and most of them out of
repair. The people in the streets walked fast, looked wild,
their eyes fixed, and were generally in rags. We passed
through one of the town gates, and went about three miles into
the country, where I saw many laborers working with several
sorts of tools in the ground, but was not able to conjecture
what they were about; neither did I observe any expectation
either of corn or grass, although the soil appeared to be excel-
lent. I could not forbear admiring at these odd appearances,
both in town and country; and I made bold to desire my con-
ductor, that he would be pleased to explain to me, what could
be meant by so many busy heads, hands, and faces, both in the
streets and the fields, because I did not discover any good
effects they produced; but, on the contrary, I never knew a
soil so unhappily cultivated, houses so ill-contrived and so ruin-
ous, or a people whose countenances and habits expressed so
much misery and want. *
This Lord Munodi was a person of the first rank, and had
The description of the people of Lagado seems intended for the people of London dur-
ing the prevalence of the rage for speculation, from 1718 to 1720. Lord Mahon gives the
following lively picture of the mania. "The Prince of Wales became a governor of the
Welch Copper Company. Such an example was tempting to follow: the Duke of Chandos
and the Earl of Westmoreland appeared likewise at the head of bubbles; and the people at
large soon discovered that to speculate is easier than to work. Change Alley became a new
edition of the Rue Quincampoix. The crowds were so great within doors, that tables with
clerks were set in the streets. In this motley throng were blended all ranks, all professions,
and all parties; churchmen and dissenters, Whigs and Tories, country gentlemen and bro
kers. An eager strife of tongues prevailed in this second Babel; new reports, new subscrip-
tions, new transfers flew from mouth to mouth; and the voice of ladies (for many ladies had
turned gamblers) rose loud and incessant above the general din. * *Such extrava-
gances might well provoke laughter; but unhappily, though the farce came first, there was a
tragedy behind.
Thousands of families were reduced to beggary, thousands more
were threatened with the same fate: and the large fortunes made, or supposed to be made,
by a few individuals, served only by comparison to aggravate the common ruin. Those who
had sported most proudly on the surface of the water were left stranded and bare by the
sphing of that mighty tide.”—Lord Mahon's History of England, vol, ji.p 16-19,
214
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
been some years governor of Lagado; but, by a cabal of minis-
ters, was discharged for insufficiency. However, the king
treated him with tenderness, as a well-meaning man, but of a
low, contemptible understanding. **
When I gave that free censure of the country and its in-
habitants, he made no farther answer than by telling me, "that
I had not been long enough among them to form a judgment;
and that the different nations of the world had different cus-
toms;" with other common topics to the same purpose. But,
when we returned to his palace, he asked me, "how I liked the
building, what absurdities I observed, and what quarrel I had
with the dress or looks of his domestics?" This he might
safely do; because everything about him was magnificent,
regular, and polite. I answered, "that his Excellency's pru-
dence, quality, and fortune, had exempted him from those
defects, which folly and beggary had produced in others." He
said, "if I would go with him to his country house, about twenty
miles distant, where his estate lay, there would be more leisure
for this kind of conversation." I told his Excellency, "that I
was entirely at his disposal;" and accordingly we set out next
morning.
i
During our journey he made me observe the several methods
used by farmers in managing their lands, which to me were
wholly unaccountable; for, except in some very few places, I
could not discover one ear of corn, or blade of grass. But, in
three hours' travelling, the scene was wholly altered; we came
into a most beautiful country; farmers' houses, at small
distances, neatly built; the fields inclosed, containing vineyards,
corn-grounds, and meadows. Neither do I remember to have
seen a more delightful prospect. His Excellency observed my
countenance to clear up; he told me with a sigh, “that there
his estate began, and would continue the same, till we should
come to his house: that his countrymen ridiculed and despised
him, for managing his affairs no better, and for setting so ill an
example to the kingdom; which however was followed by very
few, such as were old, and wilful and weak, like himself."
We came at length to the house, which was indeed a noble
*The character of Lord Munodi appears to have been intended for Lord Bolingbroke:
on his return to England, after the partial reversal of the act of attainder, he retired into
the country, where he attempted to persuade himself and others, that, smitten with the
charms of solitude and rural life, he had resolved to abandon politics forever, and devote
himself entirely to the improvement of his estate at Dawley. Though Swift flattered these
professions, he was not duped by them. Bolingbroke soon took an active share in organiz
ing a formidable opposition against Sir Robert Walpole, and shook the minister in his seat.
But during the debate on the repeal of the Septennial Act, Walpole took an opportunity
of developing the intrigues of Bolingbroke, both at home and abroad, which so confounded
the disappointed statesman that he quitted the country, and retired to France.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
215
structure, built according to the best rules of architecture. The
fountains, gardens, walks, avenues, and groves were all disposed
with exact judgment and taste. I gave due praises to every-
thing I saw, whereof his Excellency took not the least notice
till after supper; when, there being no third companion, he
told me with a very melancholy air, "that he doubted he must
throw down his houses in town and country, to rebuild them
after the present mode; destroy all his plantations, and cast
others into such a form as modern usage required, and give the
same directions to his tenants, unless he would submit to incur
the censure of pride, singularity, affectation, ignorance, caprice.
and perhaps increase his majesty's displeasure; that the admir-
ation I appeared to be under would cease or diminish, when
he had informed me of some particulars which probably I never
heard of at court; the people there being too much taken up
in their own speculations, to have regard to what passed here
below."
The sum of his discourse was to this effect: "that about
forty years ago, certain persons went up to Laputa, either upon
business or diversion, and, after five months' continuance, came
back with a very little smattering in mathematics, but full of
volatile spirits acquired in that airy region: that these persons,
upon their return, began to dislike the management of every-
thing below, and fell into schemes of putting all arts, sciences,
languages, and mechanics upon a new foot. To this end, they
procured a royal patent for erecting an academy of projectors
in Lagado; and the humor prevailed so strongly among the
people, that there is not a town of any consequence in the king-
dom without such an academy. In these colleges the profes-
sors contrive new rules and methods of agriculture and building,
and new instruments and tools for all trades and manufactures ;
whereby, as they undertake one man shall do the work of ten,
a palace may be built in a week, of materials so durable as to
last forever without repairing. All the fruits of the earth shall
come to maturity at whatever season we think fit to choose,
and increase a hundred-fold more than they do at present ;, with
innumerable other happy proposals. The only inconvenience
is, that none of these projects are yet brought to perfection;
and in the meantime, the whole country lies miserably waste,
the houses in ruins, and the people without food or clothes.
By all which, instead of being discouraged, they are fifty times
more violently bent upon prosecuting their schemes, driven
equally on by hope and despair: that as for himself, being not
of an enterprising spirit, he was content to go on in the old
216
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
forms, to live in the houses his ancestors had built, and act as
they did, in every part of life, without innovation; that some
few other persons of quality and gentry had done the same, but
were looked on with an eye of contempt and ill-will, as enemies
to art, ignorant, and ill commonwealth's men, preferring thei
own ease and sloth before the general improvement of their
country."
His Lordship added "that he would not, by any farther par-
ticulars, prevent the pleasure I should certainly take in viewing
the grand academy, whither he resolved I should go. He only
desired me to observe a ruined building, upon the side of a
mountain about three miles distant, of which he gave me this
account: “that he had a very convenient mill within half a
mile of his house, turned by a current from a large river, and
sufficient for his own family as well as a great number of his
tenants; that about seven years ago a club of these projectors
came to him with proposals to destroy this mill, and build an-
other on the side of that mountain, on the long ridge whereof a
long canal must be cut, for a repository of water, to be conveyed
up by pipes and engines to supply the mill because the wind
and air upon a height agitated the water, and thereby made it
fitter for motion; and because the water, descending down a de-
clivity, would turn the mill with half the current of a river,
whose course is more upon a level." He said, "that being
then not very well with the court, and pressed by many of his
friends, he complied with the proposal: and after employing a
hundred men for two years, the work miscarried, the projectors
went off, laying the blame entirely upon him, railing at him
ever since, and putting others upon the same experiment, with
equal assurance of success, as well as equal disappointment."
In a few days we came back to town; and his Excellency,
considering the bad character he had in the academy, would
not go with me himself, but recommended me to a friend of his,
to bear me company thither. My Lord was pleased to rep
resent me as a great admirer of projects, and a person of much
curiosity and easy belief: which, indeed was not without truth:
for I had myself been a sort of projector in my younger days
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
217
CHAPTER V.
1 HE AUTHOR PERMITTED TO SEE THE GRAND ACADEMY OF LAGADO
-THE ACADEMY LARGELY DESCRIBED-THE ARTS WHEREIN
THE PROFESSORS EMPLOY THEMSELVES.
CONCEIVING that my readers will be anxious to know the
particulars of the Laputian university, I shall now proceed to
describe it. This academy is not an entire single building,
but a continuation of several houses on both sides of a street
which growing waste, was purchased and applied to that use.
I was received very kindly by the warden, and went for
many days to the academy. Every room has in it one or
more projectors; and I believe I could not be in fewer than
five hundred rooms.
The first man I saw was of a meagre aspect, with sooty
hands and face, his hair and beard long, ragged, and singed
in several places. His clothes, shirt, and skin, were all of the
same color. He had been eight years upon a project
for ex-
* Sir Walter Scott justly observes that Swift has borrowed the notion of the Academy of
Lagado from Rabelais's description of the court of Queen Whim. Swift, in his account of
the employments of the academicians at Lagado, has improved the humor of Rabelais's de-
scription of the occupations of the queen's courtiers, but he has not diminished the coarse.
pess. A brief specimen will be sufficient.
"I saw a great number of the queen's officers, who made blackamoors white as fast as
hops, just rubbing their bellies with the bottom of a pannier.
66
Others with three couple of foxes in one yoke, ploughed a sandy shore, and did not
lose their seed.
"Others sheared asses, and thus got long fleece wool.
"Poor Pauurge fairly cast up his accounts and vomited, seeing an Archasdarpenin, who
laid a huge plenty of chamber lye to putrefy in horse-dung, mish-mashed with abundance of
Christian sir-reverence. Pugh! fie upon him! nasty dog! However, he told us, that with
this sacred distillation he watered kings and princes, and made their sweet lives a fathom or
two in length. *
"We saw a knot of others, about a baker's dozen in number, tippling under an arbor.
They toped out of jolly bottomless cups, four sorts of cool, sparkling, delicious vine-tree
syrup, which went down like mother's milk; and healths and bumpers flew about like light-
ing. We were told that these true philosophers were fairly multiplying the stars by drink-
ing, till the seven were fourteen, as brawny Hercules did with Atlas.
"
Others in a large grass-plot exactly measured how far the fleas could go at a hop, a step,
nd a jump; and told us that this was exceeding useful for the ruling of kingdoms, the cor-
duct of armies, and the administration of commonwealths. And that Socrates, who first
got
philosophy out of heaven, and from idling and trifling made it profitable and of moment,
used to spend half his philosophizing time in measuring the leaps of fleas, as Aristophanes
the Quintessential affirms.
"In a blind corner I met four more very hot at it, and ready to go to loggerheads. I
asked what was the cause of this stir and ado, the mighty coil and pother they made. And
I heard that for five livelong days these overwise roysterers had been at it ding-dong, dispu
ting on three high, more than metaphysical propositions, promising themselves mountains of
gold by solving them. The first was concerning a he-ass's shadow; the second of the
smoke of a lantern; and the third of goat's hair, whether it were wool or no? We heard
that they did not think it a bit strange that two contradictions in mode, form, figure, and
time, should be true. Though I'll warrant the sophists of Paris had rather be unchristened
thao own so much.”—-Rabelais, book 5. chap. xxii.
218
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
tracting sunbeams out of cucumbers, which were to be put in
phials hermetically sealed, and let out to warm the air in raw
inclement summers. He told me, he did not doubt, that in
eight years more, he should be able to supply the governor's
gardens with sunshine, at a reasonable rate; but he complained
that his stock was low, and entreated me to give him some-
thing as an encouragement to ingenuity, especially since this
had been a very dear season for cucumbers. I made him a
small present, for my lord had furnished me with money on
purpose, because he knew their practice of begging from all
who go to see them.
I went into another chamber, but was ready to hasten
back, being almost overcome with a horrible stink. My con-
ductor pressed me forward, conjuring me in a whisper "to give
no offence, which would be highly resented ;" and therefore I
durst not so much as stop my nose. The projector of this cell
was the most ancient student of the academy; his face and
beard were of a pale yellow; his hands and clothes daubed over
with filth. When I was presented to him, he gave me a close
embrace; a compliment I could well have excused. His em-
ployment, from his first coming into the academy, was an
operation to reduce human excrement to its original food, by
separating the several parts, removing the tincture which it re-
ceives from the gall, making the odor exhale, scumming off
the saliva. He had a weekly allowance, from the society, of a
vessel filled with human ordure, about the bigness of a Bristol
barrel.
I saw another at work to calcine ice into gunpowder; who
likewise showed me a treatise he had written concerning the
malleability of fire, which he intended to publish.*
There was a most ingenious architect, who had contrived a
new method for building houses, by beginning at the roof, and
66
"For
*No powers of ridicule could exaggerate the absurdity of the projects for which com
panies were formed in 1720, during the South Sea mania; and Swift's account of the Academy
of Lagado is tame when compared with the authentic list of the bubbles of the day.
Amongst them we find: "For building and rebuilding houses throughout all England
(thre_illions).” "For encouraging the breed of horses, and improving church lands.”
For erecting salt-pans in Holy Island (two millions)." For furnishing funerals to any
part of great Britain." "For carrying on the royal fishery of Great Britain (ten millions)."
"For insuring of horses (two millions). "For a wheel for perpetual motion (one million.”
"For drying malt by hot air." "For building of hospitals for bastard children.”
the transmutation of quicksilver into a malleable fine metal." "For buying and fitting out
ships to suppress pirates." "For importing a rumber of large jack-asses from Spain."
"For extracting silver from lead." But perhaps the most strange of all was "For an
undertaking of great advantage which shall in due time be revealed." Each subscriber was
to pay down two guineas, and hereafter to receive a share of one hundred, with a disclosure
of the object; and so tempting was the offer, that one thousand of these subscriptions were
paid the same morning, with which the projector went off in the afternoon. A ballad, which
has been added as an Appendix to the Voyage to Laputa, had a considerable effect in dis-
pelling the national delusion.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
219
working downward to the foundation; which he justified to me,
by the like practice of those two prudent insects, the bee and
the spider.
There was a man born blind, who had several apprentices
in his own condition: their employment was to mix colors for
painters, which their master taught them to distinguish by feel-
ing and smelling. It was indeed my misfortune to find them
at that time not very perfect in their lessons, and the professor
himself happened to be generally mistaken. This artist is much
encouraged and esteemed by the whole fraternity.*
In another apartment, I was highly pleased with a projector
who had found a device of ploughing the ground with hogs, to
save the charges of ploughs, cattle, and labor. The method
is this: in an acre of ground, you bury, at six inches distance
and eight deep, a quantity of acorns, dates, chestnuts, and
other mast or vegetables, whereof these animals are fondest;
then you drive six hundred or more of them into the field,
where, in a few days, they will root up the whole ground in
search of their feed, and make it fit for sowing, at the same
time manuring it with their dung: it is true, upon experiment,
they found the charge and trouble very great, and they had
little or no crop. However, it is not doubted, that this inven-
tion may be capable of great improvement.
I went into another room, where the walls and ceiling were
all hung round with cobwebs, except a narrow passage for the
artist to go in and out. At my entrance, he called aloud to
me, not to disturb his webs." He lamented "the fatal mis-
take the world had been so long in, of using silkworms, while
he had suc¹ plenty of domestic insects who infinitely excelled
the former, because they understood how to weave, as well as
spin." And he proposed farther, "that by employing spiders,
the charge of dyeing silks should be wholly saved;" whereof I
was fully convinced, when he showed me a vast number of flies
most beautifully colored, wherewith he fed his spiders, assuring
us that the webs would take a tincture from them; and as he
had them of all hues, he hoped to fit everybody's fancy, as
soon as he could find proper food for the flies, of certain gums,
CC
* Some philosophers of Swift's days maintained that the blind could be taught to dis-
tinguish colors by the touch, and quoted the example of a blind Danish sculptor, mentioned
by Bartolin, who distinguished all kinds of wood, and all the colors, merely by feeling.
Indeed, there are few sciences in which the blind have not distinguished themselves. The
case of Professor Sanderson, at Cambridge, is well known. His attainments in the languages,
and still more in mathematics, in philosophy, and in music, were truly astonishing. His
sense of touch was so acute that he distinguished spurious coins merely by letting them pass
through his fingers, though they were so well executed that even skilful judges were deceived
by them. It is probable that a project to provide employment for the blind was issued
among the bubbles of 1720, though it is not found in any of the lists.
220
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
oils, and other glutinous matter, to give a strength and con-
sistence to the threads.*
There was an astronomer, who had undertaken to place a
sun-dial upon the great weathercock on the town-house, by ad-
justing the annual and diurnal motions of the earth and sun, so
as to answer and coincide with all accidental turnings of the
wind.
I was complaining of a small fit of the colic, upon which
my conductor led me into a room where a great physician re-
sided, who was famous for curing that disease, by contrary
operations from the same instrument. He had a large pair of
bellows, with a long slender muzzle of ivory: this he conveyed
eight inches up the anus, and drawing in the wind, he affirmed
he could make the guts as lank as a dried bladder. But when
the disease was more stubborn and violent, he let in the muzzle
while the bellows were full of wind, which he discharged into
the body of the patient; then withdrew the instrument to re-
plenish it clapping his thumb strongly against the orifice of the
fundament; and this being repeated three or four times, the
*This is not a caricature, but an unexaggerated statement of a project seriously pro-
posed by M. Bon, an ingenious Frenchman, who published a dissertation on the subject in
the year 1710. He divided spider-threads into two kinds: "The first is weak, and only
serves for that kind of web with which they catch flies. The second is much stronger, and
is used as a covering for the eggs, both to shelter them from the cold, and preserve them
from insects. These threads they wind very loosely round the eggs, resembling the balls or
bags of silkworms that have been prepared and loosened for the distaff. The spider-
bags are of a gray color when new; but they turn blackish when long exposed to the
air; indeed one might find other spider-bags of different colors, and which would
afford a better silk, but their scarcity would render the experiment difficult: for which
reason it is better to use only the bags of the short-legged spiders, which are the most
common kind. These always find out some place, secure from the wind and the rain, to make
their bags, as hollow trees, the corners of windows or vaults, or under the eaves of houses."
To the dissertation is appended a very interesting detail of M. Bon's expern. nts and their
results, of which the following is a brief abstract. "Out of eight hundred spiders which M.
Bon kept, scarcely one died in a year, whereas of one hundred silkworms. not forty lived to
make their bags. M. Bon having ordered all the short-leggea spaers that could be found
in the months of August and September to be brought to him, shut them up in paper coffins
and pots, covering the pots with paper, which he pricked full of pin-holes, as well as the
coffins, to give them air. He fed them with flies, and found some time afterwards, that the
greater part of them had made their bags. The same ingenious person found that spider's
bags, with regard to their weight, afforded much more silk than those of the silkworms: as
a proof of which he observes, that thirteen ounces yield four ounces of clear silk, two ounces
of which will make a pair of stockings; whereas, stockings of common silk weigh
seven or eight ounces. He found that the spider-silk readily took all kinds of dyes,
and might be made into all kinds of stuffs. M. Bon had stockings and gloves made of it,
some of which he presented to the Royal Academy of France, and others to our Royal
Society. The Royal Academy of France appointed the celebrated M. Reaumur to
investigate this new silk-work, and his report is contained in the memoirs of the Academy
for 1710. Reaumur showed that such a manufacture was by no means impossible, but at
the same time demonstrated that the material would not be worth the trouble and expense
of its preparation.
It is a pity that Swift was not acquainted with the more ludicrous details of M. Bon's
proposal. He asserted that spider-silk would yield by distillation, several specific medicines,
particularly great quantities of spirit and volatile salts, which, being prepared after the same
manner as that drawn from the bags of silkworms in making the Gutte Anglicanæ, or
English drops, at one time so famous all over Europe, may serve to make other drops of
greater efficacy, which M. Bon calls drops of Montpellier, and advises to be used in all
lethargic or sleepy disorder
GUILLVER'S TRAVELS.
221
3
adventitious wind would rush out bringing the noxious along
with it (like water put into a pump), and the patient recovered.
I saw him try both experiments upon a dog, but could not dis-
cern any effect from the former. After the latter the animal
was ready to burst, and made so violent a discharge as was
very offensive to me and my companion. The dog died on the
spot, and we left the doctor endeavoring to recover him, by the
same operation.*
I visited many other apartments, but shall not trouble my
reader with all the curiosities I observed, being studious of
brevity.
I had hitherto seen only one side of the academy, the other
being appropriated to the advancers of speculative learning, of
whom I shall say something, when I have mentioned one illus-
trious person more, who is called among them "the universal
artist." He told us "he had been thirty years employing his
thoughts for the improvement of human life." He had two
large rooms full of wonderful curiosities, and fifty men at work.
Some were condensing air into a dry tangible substance, by
extracting the nitre, and letting the aqueous or fluid particles
percolate; others softening marble, for pillows and pin-cush-
ions; others petrifying the hoofs of a living horse, to preserve
them from foundering. The artist himself was at that time
busy upon two great designs; the first, to sow land with chaff,
wherein he affirmed the true seminal virtue to be contained, as
he demonstrated by several experiments, which I was not skil-
ful enough to comprehend. The other was, by a certain com-
position of gums, minerals, and vegetables, outwardly applied,
to prevent the growth of wool upon two young lambs; and he
hoped, in a reasonable time, to propagate the breed of naked
sheep all over the kingdom.
We crossed a walk to the other part of the academy, where,
as I have already said, the projectors in speculative learning
resided.
The first professor I saw, was in a very large room, with
forty pupils about him. After salutation, observing me to look
earnestly upon a frame, which took up the greatest part of both
the length and breadth of the room, he said, "Perhaps I might
* The ridicule of this passage is directed against Dr. Woodward, who published a theory
of vomition, founded on a series of experiments he had tried with dogs. Woodward was
rather severely attacked by Dr. Friend, who treated him as an ignorant empiric. Friend
was a zealous Tory, and intimately connected with the Bishop of Rochester; indeed he was
sent to the Tower, when the Habeas Corpus Act was suspended, on account of Layer's plot
Swift know nothing of the merits of the discussion, but he was intimate with Friend, and
disliked Woodward; Pope shared the same feelings, for in Martinus Scriblerus there is a
very humorous parody of Woodward's Dissertation on an Ancient Shield.
222
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
wonder to see him employed in a project for improving specu
lative knowledge, by practical and mechanical operations. But
the world would soon be sensible to its usefulness; and he
flattered himself that a more nɔble, exalted thought never
sprang into any other man's head. Every one knew how la-
borious the usual method is of attaining to arts and sciences;
whereas, by his contrivance, the most ignorant person, at a
reasonable charge, and with a little bodily labor, might write
books in philosophy, poetry, politics, laws, mathematics, and
theology, without the least assistance from genius or study."
He then led me to the frame, about the sides whereof all his
pupils stood in ranks. It was twenty feet square, placed in the
middle of the room. The superficies was composed of several
bits of wood, about the bigness of a die, but some larger than
others. They were all linked together by slender wires. These
bits of wood were covered, on every square, with paper pasted on
them; and on these papers were written all the words of their
language, in their several moods, tenses, and declensions; but
without any order. The professor then desired me "to ob-
serve; for he was going to set his engine at work." The pupils,
at his command, took each of them hold of an iron handle,
whereof there were forty fixed round the edges of the frame;
and giving them a sudden turn, the whole disposition of the
words was entirely changed. He then commanded six-and-
thirty of the lads to read the several lines softly, as they ap-
peared upon the frame; and where they found three or four
words together that might make part of a sentence, they dic-
tated to the four remaining boys, who were scribes. This work
was repeated three or four times; and at every turn, the engine
was so contrived, that the words shifted into new places, as the
square bits of wood moved upside down.*
Six hours a day the young students were employed in this
labor; and the professor showed me several volumes in large
folio, already collected, of broken sentences, which he intended
to piece together, and out of those rich materials, to give the
* Raymond Lully actually propounded a mechanical contrivance for the solution of all
possible problems. And Cornelius Agrippa wrote a commentary upon the project, by means
of which he declared that any man might be enabled with facility to discuss any subject,
however abstruse and difficult. The machine was to consist of a certain number of con-
centric circles, some fixed and some movable: on the second, absolute predicates; on the
third, relative predicates; and on the others, formularies of questions. A system of
triangles was applied for expressing conditions and limitations; and Agrippa in his Com-
mentaries gives some extraordinary specimens of results. Many eminent men, particularly
Kircher and Kühlman, advocated this mechanical contrivance, and averred that they had
brought it to a high degree of perfection. Those who have witnessed the operations of
Babbage's calculating machine must confess, that so far as the relations of quantity are
concerned, a mechanical contrivance has succeeded in solving problems which would test
the highest attainments of a mathematician.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
223
!
•
world a complete body of all arts and sciences; which, how-
ever, might be still improved, and mucl. expedited, if the public
would raise a fund for making and employing five hundred such
frames in Lagado, and oblige the managers to contribute in
common their several collections.
He assured me that this invention had employed all his
thoughts from his youth; that he had emptied the whole vo-
cabulary into his frame, and made the strictest computation of
the general porportion there is in books between the numbers
of particles, nouns, and verbs, and other parts of speech."
I made my humblest acknowledgment to this illustrious
person for his great communicativeness; and promised, "if
ever I had the good fortune to return to my native country,
that I would do him justice, as the sole inventor of this won-
derful machine;" the form and contrivance of which I desireá
leave to delineate on paper. I told him," although it were the
custom of our learned in Europe to steal inventions from each
other, who had thereby at least this advantage, that it became
a controversy which was the right owner: yet I would take
such caution, that he should have the honor entire, without a
rival."
(C
We next went to the school of languages, where three pro-
fessors sat in consultation upon improving that of their own
country.
The first project was to shorten discourse, by cutting poly-
syllables into one, and leaving out verbs and participles; be
cause, in reality, all things imaginable are but nouns.
33
The other project was a scheme for entirely abolishing all
words whatsoever; and this was urged as a great advantage
in point of health as well as brevity. For it is plain, that every
word we speak is, in some degree, a diminution of our lungs
by corrosion; and consequently contributes to the shortening
of our lives. An expedient was therefore offered, "that since
words are only names for things, it would be more convenient
for all men to carry about them such things as were necessary
to express a particular business they are to discourse on.
And this invention would certainly have taken place, to the
great ease as well as health of the subject, if the women, in
conjunction with the vulgar and illiterate, had not threatened
to raise a rebellion unless they might be allowed the liberty to
speak with their tongues after the manner of their forefathers;
such constant irreconcilable enemies to science are the com-
mon people. However, many of the most learned and wise
adhere to the new scheme of expressing themselves by things ;
224
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
which has only this inconvenience attending it, that it a man's
business be very great, and of various kinds, he must be
obliged, in proportion, to carry a greater bundle of things upon
his back, unless he can afford one or two strong servants to
attend him. I have often beheld two of these sages almost
sinking under the weight of their packs, like pedlers among
us; who, when they met in the street would lay down their
loads, open their sacks, and hold conversation for an hour
together; then put up their implements, help each other to
resume their burdens, and take their leave.
But for short conversations, a man may carry implements
in his pockets, and under his arms, enough to supply him; and
in his house, he cannot be at a loss. Therefore the room
where company meet who practice this art, is full of all things,
ready at hand, requisite to furnish matter for this kind of
artificial converse.
Another great advantage proposed by this invention was,
that it would serve as a universal language, to be understood
in all civilized nations, whose goods and utensils are generally
of the same kind, or nearly resembling, so that their uses
might easily be comprehended. And thus ambassadors would
be qualified to treat with foreign princes, or ministers of state,
to whose tongues they were utter strangers.
I was at the mathematical school, where the master taught
his pupils after a method scarce imaginable to us in Europe.
The proposition and demonstration were fairly written on a
thin wafer, with ink composed of a cephalic tincture. This,
the student was to swallow upon a fasting stomach, and for
three days following eat nothing but bread and water. As the
wafer digested, the tincture mounted to his brain, bearing the
composition along with it. But the success has not hitherto
been answerable, partly by some error in the quantum or
proposition, and partly by the perverseness of lads, to whom
this bolus is so nauseous, that they generally steal aside, and
discharge it upwards, before it can operate; neither have
they been yet persuaded to use so long an abstinence as the
prescription requires.
CHAPTER VI.
A FARTHER ACCOUNT OF THE ACADEMY
OF THE ACADEMY THE AUTHOR PRE
POSES SOME IMPROVEMENTS, WHICH ARE HONORABLY RE
CEIVEL
JUDGMENT does not seem to rule in the school of political
projectors, where I was but ill entertained; the professors.
appearing to me wholly out of their senses, which is a' scene
that never fails to make me melancholy. These unhappy people
were proposing schemes for persuading monarchs to choose
favorites upon the score of their wisdom, capacity, and virtue
of teaching ministers to consult public good, of rewarding
merit, great abilities, and eminent services; of instructing
princes to know their true interest, by placing it on the same
foundation with that of their people; of choosing for employ-
ments persons qualified to exercise them; with many other
wild impossible chimeras, that never entered before into the
heart of man to conceive; and confirmed in me the old observa-
tion, "that there is nothing so extravagant and irrational,
which some philosophers have not maintained for truth."
But, however, I shall so far do justice to this part of the
academy, as to acknowledge that all of them were not so
visionary. There was a most ingenious doctor, who seemed
to be perfectly versed in the whole nature and system of gov-
ernment. This illustrious person had very usefully employed
his studies, in finding out effectual remedies for all diseases
and corruptions, to which the several kinds of public adminis-
tration are subject, by the vices or infirmities of those who
govern, as well as by the licentiousness of those who are to obey.
For instance; whereas all writers and reasoners have agreed,
that there is a strict universal resemblance between the natural
and the political body; can there be anything more evident,
than that the health of both must be preserved, and the dis-
eases cured, by the same prescriptions? It is allowed, that
senates and great councils are often troubled with redundant,
ebullient, and other peccant humors; with many diseases of
the head, and more of the heart; with strong convulsions,
with grievous contractions of the nerves and sinews in both
hands, but especially the right; with spleen, flatus, vertigoes,
and delirium. with scrofulous tumors, full of fetid purulent
220
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
matter; with sour frothy eructations; with canine appetites,
and crudeness of digestion, besides many others, needless to
mention. This doctor therefore proposed," that upon the
meeting of the senate, certain physicians should attend at
the three first days of their sitting, and at the close of each
day's debate feel the pulses of every senator; after which,
having maturely considered and consulted upon the nature of
the several maladies, and the methods of cure, they should on
the fourth day return to the senate-house, attended by their
apothecaries stored with proper medicines; and before the
members sat, administer to each of them lenitives, aperitives,
abstersives, corrosives, restringents, palliatives, laxatives, cephal-
lagics, icterics, apophlegmatics, acoustics, as their several cases
required, and, according as these medicines should operate,
repeat, alter, or omit them, at the next meeting."
This project could not be of any great expense to the
public; and might, in my poor opinion, be of much use for the
dispatch of business, in those countries where senates have:
any share in the legislative power; beget unanimity, shorten.
debates, open a few mouths which are now closed, and close
many more which are now open; curb the petulancy of the
young, and correct the positiveness of the old; rouse the stupid,
and damp the pert.
Again because it is a general complaint, that the favorites
of princes are troubled with short and weak memories; the
same doctor proposed, "that whoever attended a first minister,
after having told his business, with the utmost brevity and in
the plainest words, should, at his departure, give the said min-
ister a tweak by the nose, or a kick on the belly, or tread on his
corns, or lug him thrice by both ears, or run a pin into his
breech, or pinch his arm black and blue, to prevent forgetful-
ness; and at every levee-day, repeat the same operation, till
the business were done, or absolutely refused.”
He likewise directed, "that every senator in the great coun-
cil of a nation, after he had delivered his opinion and argued
in the defence of it, should be obliged to give his vote directly
contrary; because if that were done, the result would infallibly
terminate in the good of the public."
When parties in a state are violent, he offered a wonderful
contrivance to reconcile them. The method is this: you take
a hundred leaders of each party; you dispose them into
couples of such whose heads are nearest of a size; then let
two nice operators saw off the occiput of each couple at the same
time, in such a manner, that the brain may be equally divided
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
227
Let the occiputs, thus cut off, be interchanged, applying
each to the head of his opposite partyman. It seems indeed
to be a work that requires some exactness, but the professor as-
sured us," that if it were dexterously performed, the cure would
be infallible." For he argued thus: "that the two half brains
being left to debate the matter between themselves within the
space of one skull, would soon come to a good understanding;
and produce that moderation, as well as regularity of thinking,
so much to be wished for in the heads of those who imagine
they come into the world only to watch and govern its motion;
and as to the difference of brains, in quantity or quality, among
those who are directors in faction," the doctor assured us, from
his own knowledge, “that it was a perfect trifle."
I heard a very warm debate between two professors, about
the most commodious and effectual ways and means of raising
money, without grieving the subject. The first affirmed, "the
justest method would be to lay a certain tax upon vices and
folly; and the sum fixed upon every man to be rated, after the
fairest manner, by a jury of his neighbors." The second was
of an opinion directly contrary; "to tax those qualities of body
and mind for which men chiefly value themselves; the rate to
be more or less, according to the degrees of excelling; the
decision whereof should be left entirely to their own breast."
The highest tax was upon men who are the greatest favorites
of the other sex, and the assessments, according to the number
and nature of the favors they have received; for which, they
are allowed to be their own vouchers. Wit, valor, and polite-
ness, were likewise proposed to be largely taxed, and collected
in the same manner, by every person's giving his own word for
the quantum of what he possessed. But as to honor, justice,
wisdom, and learning, they should not be taxed at all; because
they are qualifications of so singular a kind, that no man will
either allow them in his neighbor or value them in himself
The women were proposed to be taxed according to their
beauty and skill in dressing, wherein they had the same
privilege with the men, to be determined by their own judg-
ment. But constancy, chastity, good senes, and good-nature,
were not rated, because they would not bear the charge of
collecting.
To keep senators in the interest of the crown, it was pro-
posed that the members shall raffle for employments; every
man first taking an oath, and giving security, that he would vote
for the court, whether he won or not: after which, the losers
had, in their turn, the liberty of raffling upon the next vacancy,
228
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
Thus, hope and expectation would be kept alive none would
complain of broken promises, but impute their disappointments
wholly to fortune, whose shoulders are broader and stronger
than those of a ministry.
Another professor showed me a large paper of instructions
for discovering plots and conspiracies against the government.*
He advised great statesmen to examine into the diet of all
suspected persons; their times of eating; upon which side they
lay in bed; with which hand they wiped their posteriors: take
a strict view of their excrements, and from the color, the odor,
the taste, the consistence, the crudeness, or maturity of diges-
tion, form a judgment of their thoughts and designs; because
men are never so serious, thoughtful, and intent, as when they
are at stool, which he found by experience; for, in such con-
junctures, when he used, merely as a trial, to consider which
was the best way of murdering the king, his ordure would
have a tincture of green: but quite different when he thought
only of raising an insurrection, or burning the metropolis.†
The whole discourse was written with great acuteness, con-
taining many observations, both curious and useful for politi-
cians; but, as I conceived, not altogether complete. This I
ventured to tell the author, and offered, if he pleased, to supply
him with some additions. He received my proposition with
more compliance than is usual among writers, especially those.
of the projecting species; professing, "he would be glad to
receive farther information."
I told him, "that in the kingdom of Tribnia, by the natives.
called Langden,§ where I had sojourned some time in my
travels, the bulk of the people consist in a manner wholly of
discoverers, witnesses, informers, accusers, prosecutors, evi-
dences, swearers, together with their several subservient and
subaltern instruments, all under the colors, the conduct, and
the pay of ministers of state, and their deputies. The plots,
* From this to the end of the chapter, the proceedings on the Bill of Attainder against
the Bishop of Rochester are bitterly ridiculed.
The following extract from the Duke of Wharton's speech on the second reading of
the Bill of Attainder, will sufficiently explain this coarse allusion. "The next point
which was attempted to be proved, was, that Captain Halstead went to fetch the
late Duke of Ormond, and was at the deanery with the bishop before he embarked; there
are also two letters, found in the bishop's close stool, from this gentleman, which were
read, but are only appointments for visits, and mention nothing of this design."
‡ Britain.
§ London.
The charge against the Bishop of Rochester was supported by circumstantial evidence
derived from a long and tangled series of intercepted correspondence and deciphered letters.
The Duke of Wharton has given in his speech a very able summary of the arguments
urged by the bishop and his friends against this line of evidence. "My lords, it very well
deserves your lordships' consideration, how far this kind of evidence is to be admitted.
It has appeared to your lordships, by the oath of Mr. Willes himself (the deci-
pherer employed by the government), that it is an art which depends upon conjecture,
for this gentleman has confessed, that every man is liable to a mistake in this as well as in
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
229
in that kingdom, are usually the workmanship of those persons
who desire to raise their own characters of profound politicians;
to restore new vigor to a crazy administration;* to stifle or
divert general discontents; to fill their coffers with forfeitures;
and raise or sink the opinion of public credit, as either shall best
answer their private advantage. It is first agreed and settled
among them, what suspected persons shall be accused of a
plot; then, effectual care is taken to secure all their letters
and papers, and put the owners in chains.
chains. These papers are
delivered to a set of artists, very dexterous in finding out the
mysterious meanings of words, syllables, and letters.
"For instance, they can discover a close-stool, to signify
a privy-council; a flock of geese, a senate; a lame dog,‡ an in-
other sciences; he tells you that he and his brother decipherers varied in one or two
instances. He allows that the chasms which they were forced to leave in those letters,
might alter the sense of them. And therefore, I cannot but think that an accusation,
grounded on such proofs, is uncertain and precarious, * The person who is the
decipherer is not to be confuted, and what he says must be taken for granted, because the
key cannot be produced with safety to the public; and consequently, if his conjectures be
admitted as evidence, our lives and fortunes must depend on the skill and honesty of the
decipherers, who may with safety impose on the legislature, when there are not means of
contradicting them for want of seeing their key."
A large section of the Whigs had separated from Walpole about this time, and hence
the Tories had plausible grounds for accusing the minister of forging a Jacobite plot in order
to confound his enemies and strengthen himself.
* The failure of the South Sea Scheme, a little before the discovery of the plot, had
given a serious shock to public credit.
† Atterbury, on the accession of George I., received evident marks of coldness from
the new sovereign; and on the breaking out of the rebellion in 1715, he rather ostentatiously
exhibited his disaffection to the House of Brunswick by refusing to sign the declaration of
the bishops in favor of the crown. He was consequently an object of suspicion long before
the plot was discovered, and when first arrested, probably believed that Walpole was act-
ing merely on conjecture. But we now know, from Sir Luke Schaah's correspon-
dence, that the conspiracy was revealed to Walpole by the regent Duke of Orleans, to
whom the agents of the Pretetender communicated the plot in the hope of obtaining as
sistance.
# The whimsical circumstances of a lame dog having furnished the most convulsive
proof against Atterbury was naturally the theme of much ridicule. "The case was as
follows: there was no doubt that certain intercepted letters to and from Jones and Illing-
ton were of a treasonable nature; the point was to prove that these names were
designed for the bishop. Now it so happened that Mrs. Atterbury, who died early this year,
had a little before received a present from Lord Mar, in France, of a small spotted dog,
called Harlequin; and this animal having broken its leg, and being left with one Mrs.
Barnes to be cured, was more than once mentioned in the correspondence f Jones and
Illington. Mrs. Barnes and some other persons were cxamined before the council on this
subject, and they, supposing that at ail events there could be no treasoa ia a lapdog, readily
owned that Harlequin was intended as a present for the Bishop of Rochester. There were
many other collateral proofs; but it was the throwing .p of this little straw which decided
from what quarter blew the wind.”—Lord Mahon's History of England, ii. 56.
The incident is thus noticed in the Report of the Committee of the House of Commons.
"Some letters have been intercepted, which there is good reason to believe were from the
Bishop of Rochester; and one of these letters being signed T. Jones, and another T. Il-
ington, your committee will now lay before the House the evidence they have found of the
bishop's being designed by those two names, collected from circumstances, which being in
themselves seemingly minute, and of little censequence, were for this reason more frankly
confessed by those who were obstinate in concealing stronger proofs, and yet at the same
time lead directly to the discovery of the person meant by those names. Mrs. Barnes b
ing examined before a committee of Lords of the Council, obstinately refused to make t
least discovery relating to George Kelly; but when she came to be asked what she
about a dog sent over to Kelly from France, not suspecting that this would lead to any dis
w
230
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
vader; the plague, a standing army; a beetle, a prime minis-
ter; the gout, a high-priest; a gibbet, a secretary of state; a
chamber-pot, a committee of grandees; a seive, a court lady;
a broom, a revolution; a mouse-trap, an employment; a bot-
tomless pit, a treasury; a sink, a court; a cap and bells, a
favorite; a broken reed, a court of justice; an empty tun, a
general; a running sore, the administration.
"When this method fails, they have two others more ef
fectual, which the learned among them call acrostics and ana-
grams. First, they can decipher all initial letters into politi-
cal meanings. Thus, N shall signify a plot; B, a regiment of
horse; L, a fleet at sea; or, secondly, by transposing the let-
ters of the alphabet in any suspected paper, they can lay open
the deepest designs of a discontented party. So, for ex
ample, if I should say in a letter to a friend, 'Our brother
Tom has just got the piles,' a skilful decipherer would dis-
cover, that the same letters which compose that sentence may be
analyzed into the following words, 'Resist,
a plot is
the tour.' And this s the anagram-
brought home,
matic method." *
The professor made me great acknowledgments for com-
covery, she readily owned that a spotted little dog called Harlequin, which was brought
from France, and had a leg broken, was left with her by Mr. Kelly to be cured; that the
said dog was not for her, but for the Bishop of Rochester; and that Kelly promised to
get the dog for her from the Bishop of Rochester, in case it did not recover of its lameness.
* But it appears to your Committee, by letters intercepted between Kelly and
his correspondents in France, that a dog so named and hurt was sent over to Kelly from
France, to be delivered as a present to the person denoted by the names of Jones and Ill-
ington.'
"1
Swift could not resist the tempting opportunity of engaging in party warfare, from which
he had now for nine years held aloof: he poured forth one of his happest strains of satire
on "the horrid conspiracy" discovered by a French dog, who confessed as plain as he
could bark." The poem is too long for insertion here, and it is therefore put in the Appen-
dix to this Voyage.
.
*This humorous burlesque on the Report of the House of Commons seems particularly
armed at the following passage: From the time of George Kelly's being first taken up,
the Bishop of Rochester is denoted by the names Rig and Weston, as will appear from the
following circumstances. Ou the 30th of August, Kelly writes to Dillon a long letter, which
contains the particulars of the bishop's being taken into custody, examined, and committed.
On the 14th of September, Dillon's secretary writes to Kelly, that his letter on the 30th
of August came safe, and that the particulars he gave of Mr. Rig's case were very acceptable
to Mr. Dillon, whose concern for a true and worthy friend and relation cannot be doubted,
In the same
and a longing desire to know her entirely clear of her distemper.'
letter he desires to know what is become of Caste.
*That Rig denotes the bishop
is further confirmed by these particulars. Kelly, in his first letter after his enlargement,
writes word to Jerrard, all I can do now will be to deliver to your cousin Rig any goods
that you can send by private hand: he is determined not to receive them in any other way,
and indeed I cannot say he is in the wrong. How far this late affair may affect him I can-
not tell.' Now since it appears that Kelly was formerly employed in conveying letters to
and from the bishop (which are often called goods in the intercepted correspondence),
since the bishop himself has desired in his letter to Dillon, that no more letters of conse-
quence be intrusted to the post, and since Kelly's examination about the dog could affect
no one but the bishop, it may justly be concluded that Rig and the bishop are the same.'
The identification of Weston with the bishop is made out by a similar combi-
nation of minute circumstances.
""
*
*
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
231
municating these observations, and promised to make honor
able mention of me in his treatise.
I saw nothing in this country that could invite me to a
longer continuance, and began to think of returning home tr
England.
CHAPTER VII.
THE AUTHOR LEAVES LAGADO-ARRIVES AT MALDONADA—ÑO
SHIP READY-HE TAKES A SHORT VOYAGE TO GLUBBDUBDRIF
HIS RECEPTION BY THE GOVERNOR.
LAPUTA and its dependencies form part of the continent,
which extends itself, as I have reason to believe, eastward, to
that unknown tract of America, westward of California; and
north, to the Pacific Ocean, which is not above a hundred and
fifty miles from Lagado; where there is a good port, and much
commerce with the great island of Luggnagg, situated to the
north-west about 29 degrees north latitude, and 140 longitude.
This island of Luggnagg stands south-eastward of Japan, about
a hundred leagues distant. There is a strict alliance between
the Japanese emperor and the king of Luggnagg; which affords
frequent opportunities of sailing from one island to the other.
I determined therefore to direct my course this way, in order
to my return to Europe. I hired two mules, with a guide to
show me the way, and carry my small baggage. I took leave
of my
noble protector, who had shown me so much favor, and
made me a generous present at my departure.
My journey was without any accident or adventure worth re-
lating. When I arrived at the port of Maldonada (for so it is
called) there was no ship in the harbor bound for Luggnagg,
nor likely to be in some time. The town is about as large as
Portsmouth. I soon fell into some acquaintance, and was very
hospitably received. A gentleman of distinction said to me,
"that since the ships bound for Luggnagg could not be ready
in less than a month, it might be no disagreeable amusement
for me to take a trip to the little island of Glubbdubdrib, about
five leagues off to the south-west,” He offered himself and a
triend to accompany me, and that I should be provided with a
small convenient bark for the voyage.
332
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
Glubbdubdrib, as nearly as I can interpret the word, signi
fies the island of sorcerers or magicians. It is about one-third
as large as the Isle of Wight, and extremely fruitful: it is gov-
erned by the head of a certain tribe, who are all magicians.
This tribe marries only among each other, and the eldest in
succession is prince or governor. He has a noble palace, and
a park of about three thousand acres, surrounded by a wall of
hewn stone twenty feet high. In this park are several small
inclosures for cattle, corn, and gardening.
The governor and his family are served and attended by
domestics of a kind somewhat unusual. By his skill in necro-
mancy, he has a power of calling whom he pleases from the
dead, and commanding their service for twenty-four hours, but
no longer; nor can he call the same person up again in less
than three months, except upon very extraordinary occasions.
When we arrived at the island, which was about eleven in
the morning, one of the gentlemen who accompanied me went
to the governor and desired admittance for a stranger, who
came on purpose to have the honor of attending on his High-
ness. This was immediately granted, and we all three entered
the gate of the palace between two rows of guards, armed and
dressed after a very antic manner, and something in their coun-
tenances that made my flesh creep with a horror that I cannot
express. We passed through several apartments, between ser-
vants of the same sort, ranked on each side as before, till we
came to the chamber of presence; where, after three profound
obeisances and a few general questions, we were permitted to
sit on three stools, near the lowest step of his Highness's throne.
He understood the language of Balnibarbi, although it were
different from that of this island. He desired me to give him
some account of my travels; and, to let me see that I should
be treated without ceremony, he dismissed all his attendants
with a turn of his finger; at which, to my great astonishment,
they vanished in an instant, like visions in a dream when we
awake on a sudden. I could not recover myself in some time,
till the governor assured me, "that I should receive no hurt :
and observing my two companions to be under no concern, who
had been often entertained in the same manner, I began to
take courage, and related to his Highness a short history of my
several adventures, yet not without some hesitation, and fre
quently looking behind me to the place where I had seen those
domestic spectres. I had the honor to dine with the governor,
where a new set of ghosts served up the meat, and waited at
table. I now observed myself to be less terrified than I had
>>
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
233
been in the morning. I stayed till sunset, but humbly desired
his Highness to excuse me for not accepting his invitation of
lodging in the palace. My two friends and I lay at a private
house in the town adjoining, which is the capital of this little
island; and the next morning we returned to pay our duty to
the governor, as he was pleased to command us.
After this manner we continued in the island for ten days,
most part of every day with the governor, and at night in our
lodging. I soon grew so familiarized to the sight of spirits,
that after the third or fourth time they gave me no emotion at
all; or, if I had any apprehensions left, my curiosity prevailed
over them. For his Highness the governor ordered me "to call
up whatever persons I would choose to name, and in whatever
numbers, among all the dead from the beginning of the world
to the present time, and command them to answer any ques-
tions I should think fit to ask; with this condition, that my
questions must be confined within the compass of the times
they lived in. And one thing I mig t depend upon, that they
would certainly tell me the truth, for ying was a talent of no
use in the lower world."
I made my humble acknowledgments to his Highness for
so great a favor. We were in a chamber from whence there
was a fair prospect into the park. And because my first inclin-
ation was to be entertained with scenes of pomp and magnifi-
cence, I desired to see Alexander the Great at the head of his
army, just after the battle of Arbela: whic, upon a motion of
the governor's finger, immediately appeare in a large field,
under the window where we stood. Alexa ler was called up
into the room; it was with great difficulty that I understood
his Greek,* and had but little of my own.
He assured me upon
his honor "that he was not poisoned, but died of a bad fever,
by excessive drinking."†
Next, I saw Hannibal passing the Alps, who told me "he
had not a drop of vinegar in his camp."
* A hint from Gulliver that we have lost the true Greek idiom.-Orrery.
↑ In this passage there is a peculiar beauty, though it is not discovered at a hasty view.
The appearance of Alexander with a victorious army immediately after the battle of Arbela,
produces only a declaration that he died by drunkenness; thus inadequate and ridiculous in
the eye of reason is the ulitimate purpose for which Alexander with his army marched into a
remote_country, subverted a mighty empire, and deluged a nation with blood: he gained no
more than an epithet to his name, which, atter a few repetitions, was no longer regarded,
even by himself. Thus the purpose of his resurrection appears to be at least equally impor
tant with that of his life,upon which it is a satire not more bitter than just.-Hawkesworth.
Livy, the Roman historian, has related that Hannibal burnt a great pile of wood
upon a rock that stopped his passage, and when it was thus heated poured vinegar upon it,
by which it was made so soft as to be easily cut through.-Hawkesworth.
The story has been generally doubted by modern writers, since it was hardly possible
that Hannibal could have had along with his army a sufficient quantity of vinegar o make
the experiment, and since it is certain, the experiment, if made, could not have sceeded
to any useful extent.
934
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
I saw Cæsar and Pompey at the head of their troops, just
ready to engage. I saw the former, in his last great triumph.
I desired that the senate of Rome might appear before me, in
one large chamber, and a modern representative in counter-
view, in another. The first seemed to be an assembly of heroes
and demigods; the other, a knot of pedlers, pickpockets,
highwaymen, and bullies.
The governor, at my request, gave the sign for Cæsar and
Brutus to advance towards us. I was struck with a profound
veneration at the sight of Brutus, and could easily discover the
most consummate virtue, the greatest intrepidity and firmness
of mind, the truest love of his country, and general benevolence
of mankind, in every lineament of his countenance. I observed,
with much pleasure, that these two persons were in good in-
telligence with each other; and Cæsar freely confessed to me,
"that the greatest actions of his life were not equal, by many
degrees, to the glory of taking it away." I had the honor to
have much conversation with Brutus; and was told, "that his
ancestor Junius, Socrates, Epaminondas, Cato the Younger,*
Sir Thomas More, and himself, were perpetually together;" a
sextumvirate, to which all the ages of the world cannot add a
seventh.
It would be tedious to trouble the reader with relating what
vast numbers of illustrious persons were called up, to gratify
that insatiable desire I had to see the world in every period of
antiquity placed before me. I chiefly fed mine eyes with be-
holding the destroyers of tyrants and usurpers, and the restorers
of liberty to oppressed and injured nations. But it is impos-
sible to express the satisfaction I received in my own mind,
after such a manner, as to make it a suitable entertainment to
the reader.
* I am in some doubt whether Cato the censor can fairly claim a rank among so choice
a group of ghosts.-Orrery. This note of his lordship is an encomium on the judgment of
our author, who knew that Cato the censor and Cato the younger we different persons,
and for good reason preferred the latter.-Hawkesworth.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
*35
CHAPTER VIII.
A FARTHER ACCOUNT OF GLUBBDUBDRIB-ANCIENT AND MODERN
HISTORY CORRECTED.
DESIROUS to see those ancients who were most renowned
for wit and learning, I set apart one day on purpose. I pro
posed that Homer and Aristotle might appear at the head of
all their commentators; but these were so numerous, that some
hundreds were forced to attend in the court and outward rooms
of the palace. I knew, and could distinguish those two heroes,
at first sight, not only from the crowd, but from each other.
Homer was the taller and comelier person of the two, walked
very erect for one of his age, and his eyes were the most quick
and piercing I ever beheld. Aristotle stooped much, and made
use of a staff. His visage was meagre, his hair lank and thin,
and his voice hollow." * I soon discovered that both of them
were perfect strangers to the rest of the company, and had
never seen or heard of them before: and I had a whisper from
a ghost who shall be nameless, "that these commentators
always kept in the most distant quarters from their principals,
in the lower world, through a consciousness of shame and
guilt, because they had so horribly misrepresented the meaning
of those authors to posterity." I introduced Didymus and
Eustathius to Homer, and prevailed on him to treat them
better than perhaps they deserved, for he soon found they
wanted a genius to enter into the spirit of a poet. But Aris-
totle was out of all patience with the account I gave him of
Scotus and Ramus, as I presented them to him; and he asked
them, whether the rest of the tribe were as great dunces as
themselves.'
(6
""
I then desired the governor to call up Descartes and Gas-
sendi, with whom I prevailed to explain their systems to Aris.
totle. This great philosopher freely acknowledged his own
mistakes in natural philosophy, because he proceeded in many
things upon conjecture, as all men must do; and he found
that Gassendi, who had made the doctrine of Epicurus as
*This description of Aristotle is fine, and in a few words represents the true nature of
his works. By not having the immortal spirit of Homer, he was unable to keep his body
erect, and his staff, which feebly supported him, like his commentators, made this defect
more conspicuous. He wanted not some useful qualities, but these real ornaments like
his hair, were thin and ungraceful.-Orrery. In this the noble commentator seems to be
mistaken, for it cannot be believed that Aristotle's real ornaments, however few were HM
graceful-Hawkesworth.
236
GÜLLIVER'S TRAVELS.
palatable as he could, and the vortices of Descartes, were
equally to be exploded. He predicted the same fate to attrac-
tion, whereof the present learned are such zealous assertors.*
He said, "that new systems of nature were but new fashions
which would vary in every age; and even those who pretend to
demonstrate them from mathematical principles, would flourish
but a short period of time, and be out of vogue when that was
determined."
I
I spent five days in conversing with many others of the an-
cient learned. I saw most of the first Roman emperors.
prevailed on the governor to call up Heliogabalus's cooks to
dress us a dinner, but they could not show us much of their
skill, for want of materials. A helot of Agesilaus made us a
dish of Spartan broth, but I was not able to get down a second
spoonful.
The two gentlemen who conducted me to the island, were
pressed by their private affairs to return in three days, which
I employed in seeing some of the modern dead, who had made
the greatest figure, for two or three hundred years past, in our
own and other countries of Europe: and having been always
a great admirer of old illustrious families, I desired the governor
would call up a dozen or two of kings, with their ancestors in
order, for eight or nine generations. But my disappointment
was grievous and unexpected. For, instead of a long train
with royal diadems, I saw in one family two fiddlers, three
spruce courtiers, and an Italian prelate. In another, a barber,
an abbot, and two cardinals. I have too great a veneration for
crowned heads to dwell any longer on so nice a subject. But
as to counts, marquises, dukes, earls, and the like, I was not
so scrupulous. And I confess it was not without some pleasure
that I found myself able to trace the particular features, by
which certain families are distinguished, up to their originals.
I could plainly discover whence one family derives a long chin ;
why a second has abounded with knaves for two generations,
and fools for two more; why a third happened to be crack-
brained, and a fourth to be sharpers: whence it came, what
Polydore Virgil says of a certain great house, Nec vir fortis, nec
fæmina casta; how cruelty, falsehood, and cowardice, grew to
be characteristics, by which certain families are distinguished
as much by their coats of arms; who first brought the pox into
a noble house, which has lineally descended in scrofulous
* Swift here manifestly shows his ignorance of Sir Isaac Newton's philosophy, which is
founded not on conjecture, like the theories of Gassendi and Descartes, but is a legitimate
induction from ascertained facts
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
237
tumors to their posterity. Neither could I wonder at all this
when I saw such an interruption of lineages, by pages, lackeys,
valets, coachmen, gamesters, fiddlers, players, captains, and
pickpockets.
I was chiefly disgusted with modern history. For having
strictly examined all the persons of greatest name in the courts
of princes, for a hundred years past, I found how the world had
been misled by prostitute writers, to ascribe the greatest ex-
ploits in war, to cowards; the wisest counsel, to fools; sincerity,
to flatterers; Roman virtue, to betrayers of their country; piety,
to atheists; chastity, to sodomites; truth, to informers: how
many innocent and excellent persons had been condemned to
death or banishment, by the practicing of great ministers upon
the corruption of judges, and the malice of factions: how many
villains had been exalted to the highest places of trust, power,
dignity, and profit: how great a share in the motions and events
of courts, councils, and senates, might be challenged by bawds,
whores, pimps, parasites, and buffoons. How low an opinion
I had of human wisdom and integrity, when I was truly informed
of the springs and motives of great enterprises and revolutions.
in the world, and of the contemptible accidents to which they
owed their success!
Here I discovered the roguery and ignorance of those who
pretend to write anecdotes, or secret history; who send so
many kings to their graves with a cup of poison; will repeat
the discourse between a prince and a chief minister, where no
witness was by; unlock the thoughts and cabinets of ambassa
dors and secretaries of state; and have the perpetual misfor-
tune to be mistaken. Here I discovered the true causes of
many great events that have surprised the world; how a whore
can govern the back stairs, the back stairs a council, and the
council a senate. A general confessed, in my presence, “that
he got a victory purely by the force of cowardice and ill-con-
duct; "* and an admiral," that, for want of proper intelligence,
he beat the enemy, to whom he intended to betray the fleet." †
Three kings protested to me, that in their whole reigns they
never did once prefer any person of merit, unless by mistake,
or treachery of some minister in whom they confided: neither
would they do it if they were to live again; and they showed,
with great strength of reason, "that the royal throne could not
The battle of Angheim was won by the accidental death of Lieutenant Keith, just as
he was about to take advantage of the blunders of the English commanders.
† Sir Walter Scott, with great probability, conjectures that the insinuation is directed
against Admiral Russell, whose loyalty to William III., even when he won the Baval victory
La Hogue was very suspicious
238
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
be supported without corruption, because that positive, confi-
dent, restive temper, which virtue infused into a man, was a
perpetual clog to public business."*
I had the curiosity to inquire in a particular manner, by
what method great numbers had procured to themselves high
titles of honor, and prodigious estates; and I confined my in-
quiry to a very modern period; however, without grating upon
present times, because I would be sure to give no offence even
to foreigners; for I hope the reader need not to be told, that I
do not in the least intend my own country, in what I say upon
this occasion. A great number of persons concerned were
called up; and, upon a very slight examination, discovered such
a scene of infamy, that I cannot reflect upon it without some
seriousness. Perjury, oppression, subornation, fraud, pander-
ism, and the like infirmities, were among the most excusable
arts they had to mention; and for these I gave, as it was reason-
able, great allowance. But when some confessed they owed
their greatness and wealth to sodomy, or incest; others, to the
prostituting of their own wives and daughters; others to the
betraying of their country or their prince; some to poisoning;
more, to the perverting of justice, in order to destroy the inno-
cent: I hope I may be pardoned, if these discoveries inclined
me a little to abate of that profound veneration which I am
naturally apt to pay persons of high rank, who ought to be
treated with the utmost respect due to their sublime dignity, by
us their inferiors.
ï had often read of some great services done to princes and
states, and desired to see the persons by whom those services
were performed. Upon inquiry, I was told, "that their names
were to be found on no record, except a few of them, whom
history has represented as the vilest of rogues and traitors."
As to the rest, I had never once heard of them. They all ap-
peared with dejected looks and in the meanest habit; most of
them telling me, "they died in poverty and disgrace," and the
rest on a scaffold or a gibbet.
Among others, there was one person whose case appeared
a little singular. He had a youth about eighteen years old.
standing by his side. He told me "he had for many years
been commander of a ship; and in the sea-fight at Actium had
the good fortune to break through the enemy's great line of
battle, sink three of their capital ships, and take a fourth, which
was the sole cause of Antony's flight, and of the victory that
* Charles II., James II., William III., for whose memory Swift entertained no great
reverence.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
239
ensued; that the youth standing by him, his only son, was
killed in the action." He added, "that upon the confidence
of some merit, the war being at an end, he went to Rome, and
solicited at the court of Augustus to be preferred to a greater
ship, whose commander had been killed; but, without any re-
gard to his pretensions, it was given to a boy who had never seen
the sea, the son of Libertina, who waited on one of the empe
ror's mistresses. Returning back to his own vessel, he was
charged with neglect of duty, and the ship given to a favorite
page of Publicola, the vice-admiral; whereupon he retired to a
poor farm at a great distance from Rome, and there ended his
life." I was so curious to know the truth of this story, that I
desired Agrippa might be called, who was admiral in that fight.
He appeared, and confirmed the whole account; but with much
more advantage to the captain, whose modesty had extenuated
or concealed a great part of his merit.
I was surprised to find corruption grown so high and so
quick in that empire, by the force of luxury so lately intro-
duced; which made me less wonder at many parallel cases in
other countries, where vices of all kinds have reigned so much
longer, and where the whole praise, as well as pillage, has been
engrossed by the chief commander, who perhaps had the least
title to either.
As every person called up made exactly the same appear-
ance he had done in the world, it gave me melancholy reflec-
tions to observe how much the race of human kind was degen-``
erated among us, within these hundred years past; how the
pox, under all its consequences and denominations, had altered
every lineament of an English countenance; shortened the size
of bodies, unbraced the nerves, relaxed the sinews and muscles,
introduced a sallow complexion, and rendered the flesh loose
and rancid.
I descended so low, as to desire some English yeomen of
the old stamp might be summoned to appear; once so famous
for the simplicity of their manners, diet, and dress; for justice
in their dealings; for their true spirit of liberty; for their
valor, and love of their country. Neither could I be wholly
unmoved, after comparing the living with the dead, when I
considered how all these pure native virtues were prostituted
for a piece of money by their grandchildren; who, in selling
their votes and managing at elections, have acquired every vice
and corruption that can possibly be learned in a court.*
Few persons can read this chapter without feeling that it is a complete failure; "ther
needed no ghost to tell us any ofe stories for which the spirits were evoked.
"
840
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
CHAPTER IX.
THE AUTHOR RETURNS TO MALDONADA-SAILS TO THE KINGDOM
OF LUGGNAGG-THE AUTHOR CONFINED HE IS SENT FOR TO
COURT—THE MANNER OF HIS ADMITTANCE-THE
GREAT LENITY TO HIS SUBJECTS.
KING'S
LEAVE of his Highness the governor of Glubbdubdrib, hav-
ing been obtained, I returned with my two companions to
Maldonada, where, after a fortnight's waiting, a ship was ready
to sail for Luggnagg. The two gentlemen, and some others,
were so generous and kind as to furnish me with provisions,
and see me on board. I was a month in this voyage. We
had one violent storm, and were under a necessity of steering
westward to get into the trade wind, which holds for above
sixty leagues. On the 21st of April, 1708, we sailed into the
river of Clumegnig, which is a seaport town, at the south-east
point of Luggnagg. We cast anchor within a league of the
town, and made a signal for a pilot. Two of them came on
board in less than half an hour, by whom we were guided
between certain shoals and rocks, which are very dangerous in
the passage, to a large basin, where a fleet may ride in safety
to within a cable's length of the town wall.
Some of our sailors, whether out of treachery or inadver-
tence, had informed the pilots "that I was a stranger, and a
great traveller;" whereof these gave notice to a custom-house
officer, by whom I was examined very strictly upon my landing.
This officer spoke to me in the language of Balnibarbi, which,
by the force of much commerce, is generally understood in
that town, especially by seamen and those employed in the
customs. I gave him a short account of some particulars, and
made my story as plausible and consistent as I could; but I
thought it necessary to disguise my country, and call myself a
Hollander; because my intentions were for Japan, and I knew
the Dutch were the only Europeans permitted to enter into
that kingdom. I therefore told the officer, "that having been
ship-wrecked on the coast of Balnibarbi, and cast on a rock, 1
was received up into Laputa, or the flying island (of which he
had often heard), and was now endeavoring to get to Japan,
whence I might find a convenience of returning to my own
country." The officer said, "I must be confined till he could
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
241
receive orders from court, for which he would write immedi
ately, and hoped to receive an answer in a fortnight." I was
carried to a convenient lodging, with a sentry placed at the
door; however I had the liberty of a large garden, and was.
treated with humanity enough, beingmaintained all the time at
the king's charge. I was invited by several persons, chiefly
out of curiosity, because it was reported that I came from
countries very remote, of which they had never heard.
I hired a young man, who came in the same ship, to be an
interpreter: he was a native of Luggnagg, but had lived some
years at Maldonada, and was a perfect master of both lan-
guages. By his assistance, I was able to hold a conversation
with those who came to visit me; but this consisted only of
their questions and my answers.
The dispatch came from court about the time we expected.
It contained a warrant for conducting me and my retinue to
Traldragdubh, or Trildrogdrib (for it is pronounced both ways
as near as I can remember), by a party of ten horse.
All my
retinue was that poor lad for an interpreter, whom I persuaded
ato my service, and, at my humble request, we had each of us
a mule to ride on. A messenger was dispatched half a day's
journey before us, to give the king notice of my approach;
and to desire, "that his majesty would please to appoint a day
and hour, when it would be his gracious pleasure that I might
have the honor to lick the dust before his footstool." This is
the court style, and I found it to be more than matter of form :
for, upon my admittance two days after my arrival, I was com-
manded to crawl upon my belly, and lick the floor as I ad-
vanced; but, on account of my being a stranger, care was
taken to have it made so clean, that the dust was not offensive.
However, this was a peculiar grace, not allowed to any but
persons of the highest rank, when they desire an admittance.
Nay, sometimes the floor is strewed with dust on purpose,
when the person to be admitted happens to have powerful
enemies at court; and I have seen a great lord with his mouth
so crammed, that when he had crept to the proper distance
from the throne, he was not able to speak a word. Neither is
there any remedy; because it is capital for those who receive
an audience, to spit or wipe their mouths in his majesty' pres-
There is indeed another custom, which I cannot alto-
gether approve of: when the king has a mind to put any of his
nobles to death in a gentle indulgent manner, he commands
be floor to be strewed with a certain brown powder of a deadly
composition, which, being licked up, infallibly kills him in
ence.
16
Cha
242
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
twenty-four hours. But in justice to this prince's great clem
ency, and the care he has of his subjects' lives (wherein it were
much to be wished that the monarchs of Europe would imitate
him), it must be mentioned for his honor, that strict orders are
given to have the infected parts of the floor well washed after
every such execution, which, if his domestics neglect, they are
in danger of incurring his royal displeasure. I myself heard
him give directions, that one of his pages should be whipped,
whose turn it was to give notice about washing the floor after
an execution, but maliciously had omitted it; by which neg-
lect, a young lord of great hopes, coming to an audience, was
unfortunately poisoned, although the king at that time had no
design against his life. But this good prince was so gracious
as to forgive the poor page his whipping, upon promise that he
would do so no more, without special orders.*
To return from this digression: when I had crept within
four yards of the throne, I raised myself gently upon my knees,
and then striking my forehead seven times against the ground,
I pronounced the following words, as they had been taught me
the night before—Inckpling gloffthrobb squut scrumm blhiop
mlashnalt zwin tnodbalkuff hslhiophad gurdlubh asht. This is
the compliment established by the laws of the land, for all
persons admitted to the king's presence. It may be rendered
into English thus: "May your celestial majesty outlive the sun
eleven moons and a half!" To this the king returned some
answer, which, although I could not understand, yet I replied
as I had been directed: Flute drin yalerick dwuldom prastrad
mirpush, which properly signifies, "My tongue is in the mouth
of my friend;" and by this expression was meant that I de-
sired leave to bring my interpreter: whereupon the young man,
already mentioned, was accordingly introduced; by whose in-
tervention I answered as many questions as his majesty could
put in above an hour. I spoke in the Balnibarbian tongue,
and my interpreter delivered my meaning in that of Luggnagg.
The king was much delighted with my company, and ordered
his bliffmarklub, or high chamberlain, to appoint a lodging in
the court for me and my interpreter; with a daily allowance
for my table, and a large purse of gold for my common
expenses.
I stayed three months in this country, out of perfect obedi-
i
*George I. was very anxious to restore the Earl of Clancarty to his title and estates,
believing that the attainder of the family by the Irish Parliament was unjust: but the party
of the ascendency in Ireland refused to reverse the forfeiture, and the King, after a slight
show of anger, was forced to acquiesce in the continued injus, ce.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
243
འད
. .
ence to his majesty ; who was pleased highly to favor me, and
made me very honorable offers. But I thought it more con-
sistent with prudence and justice to pass the remainder of my
days with my wife and family.
CHAPTER X.
THE LUGGNAGGIANS COMMENDED-A PARTICULAR DESCRIPTION
OF THE STRULDBRUGS, WITH MANY CONVERSATIONS BETWEEN
THE AUTHOR AND SOME EMINENT PERSONS UPON THAT
SUBJECT.
LUGGNAGGIANS are polite and generous; and although they
are not without some share of that pride which is peculiar to
all Eastern countries, yet they show themselves courteous to
strangers, especially such who are countenanced by the court.
I had many acquaintance, and among persons of the best
fashion; and being always attended by my interpreter, the
conversation we had was not disagreeable.
One day, in much good company, I was asked by a person
of quality, "whether I had seen any of their struldbrugs, or
immortals?" I said, "I had not; " and desired he would
explain to me what he meant by such an appellation, applied
to a mortal creature. He told me "that sometimes, though
very rarely, a child happened to be born in a family, with a
red circular spot in the forehead, directly over the left eye-
brow, which was an infallible mark that it should never die.
The spot," as he described it, "was about the compass of a
silver threepence, but in the course of time grew larger, and
changed its color; for at twelve years old it became green, so
continued till five-and-twenty, then turned to a deep blue; at
five-and-forty it grew coal-black, and as large as an English
shilling; but never admitted any farther alteration." He said,
these births were so rare, that he did not believe there could
be above eleven hundred strulbrugs, of both sexes, in the whole
kingdom; of which he computed about fifty in the metropolis,
and among the rest, a young girl born about three years ago.
that these productions were not peculiar to any family, but a
mere effect of chance; and the children of the strulbrugs them-
selves were equaily mortal with the rest of the people."
#44
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
I freely own myself to have been struck with inexpressible
delight upon hearing this account; and the person who gave it
me happening to understand the Balnibarbian language, which
I spoke very well, I could not forbear breaking out into expres-
sions perhaps a little too extravagant. I cried out, as in a rap-
ture, "Happy nation, where every child has at least a chance
for being immortal! Happy people, who enjoy so many living
examples of ancient virtue, and have masters ready to instruct
them in the wisdom of all former ages! but happiest, beyond
all comparison, are those excellent struldbrugs, who, being born
exempt from that universal calamity of human nature, have their
minds free and disengaged, without the weight and depression
of spirits caused by the continual apprehension of death." I
discovered my admiration, "that I had not observed any of
these illustrious persons at court; the black spot on the forehead
being so remarkable a distinction, that I could not have easily
overlooked it: and it was impossible that his majesty, a most
judicious prince, should not provide himself with a good number
of such wise and able counsellors. Yet perhaps the virtue of
those reverend sages was too strict for the corrupt and libertine
manners of a court; and we often find by experience, that
young men are too opinionated and volatile to be guided by the
sober dictates of their seniors. However, since the king was
pleased to allow me access to his royal person, I was resolved,
upon the very first occasion, to deliver my opinion to him on
this matter freely and at large, by the help of my interpreter ;
and whether he would please to take my advice or not, yet in
one thing I was determined, that his majesty having frequently
offered me an establishment in this country, I would, with great
thankfulness, accept the favor, and pass my life here in the con-
versation of those superior beings the struldbrugs, if they would
please to admit me."
The gentleman to whom I addressed my discourse, because
(as I have already observed) he spoke the language of Balni-
barbi, said to me with a sort of smile which usually arises from
pity to the ignorant," that he was glad of any occasion to keep
me among them,and desired my permission to explain to the com
pany what I had spoke." He did so, and they talked together
for some time in their own language, whereof I understood not
a syllable, neither could I observe by their countenances, what
impression my discourse had made on them. After a short
silence, the same person told me, "that his friends and mine (so
he thought fit to express himself) were very much pleased with
the judicious remarks I had made on the great happiness and
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
245
advantages of immortal life, and they were desirous to know, in
a particular manner, what scheme of living I should have
formed to myself, if it had fallen to my lot to have been born a
struldbrug?'
I answered, "that it was easy to be eloquent on so copious
and delightful a subject, especially to me, who had been often
apt to amuse myself with visions of what I should do, if I were
a king, a general, or a great lord; and upon this very case, I
had frequently run over the whole system how I should employ
myself, and pass the time; if I were sure to live forever.
46
That, if it had been my good fortune to come into the
world a struldbrug, as soon as I could discover my own happi-
ness, by understanding the difference between life and death, I
would first resolve, by all arts and methods whatsoever, to pro-
cure myself riches; in the pursuit of which, by thrift and man-
agement, I might reasonably expect, in about two hundred
years, to be the wealthiest man in the kingdom. In the second
place, I would, from my earliest youth, apply myself to the study
of arts and sciences, by which I should arrive in time to excel
all others in learning. Lastly, I would carefully record every
action and event of consequence, that happened in the public,
impartially draw the characters of the several successions of
princes and great ministers of state, with my own observations
on every point. I would exactly set down the several changes
in customs, language, fashions of dress, diet, and diversions, by
which acquirement, I should be a living treasure of knowledge
and wisdom, and certainly become the oracle of the nation.
“I would never marry after threescore, but live in a hospit-
able manner, yet still on the saving side. I would entertain
myself in forming and directing the minds of hopeful young
men, by convincing them, from my own remembrance, expe-
rience and observation, fortified by numerous examples, of the
usefulness of virtue in public and private life. But my choice.
and constant companions should be a set of my own immortal
brotherhood; among whom I would elect a dozen from the
most ancient, down to my own contemporaries. Where any of
these wanted fortunes I would provide them with convenient
lodges around my estate, and have some of them always at my
table; only mingling a few of the most valuable among you
mortals, whom length of time would harden me to lose with
little or no reluctance, and treat your posterity after the same
manner; just as a man diverts himself with the annual succes-
sion of pinks and tulips in his garden, without regarding the
less of those which withered the preceding yea.
246
gulliver's Travels.
"These struldbrugs, and I, would mutually communicate our
observations and memorials, through the course of time; remark
the several gradations by which corruption steals into the world,
and oppose it in every step, by giving perpetual warning and
instruction to mankind; which, added to the strong influence of
our own example, would probably prevent that continual degen-
eracy of human nature, so justly complained of in all ages.
"Add to this, the pleasure of seeing the various revolutions
of states and empires; the changes in the lower and upper
world; ancient cities in ruins, and obscure villages become the
seats of kings; famous rivers lessening into shallow brooks;
the ocean leaving one coast dry, and overwhelming another;
the discovery of many countries yet unknown; of barbarity over-
running the politest nations, and the most barbarous become
civilized. I should then see the discovery of the longitude, the
perpetual motion, the universal medicine, and many other great
inventions, brought to the utmost perfection.
"What wonderful discoveries should we make in astronomy,
by outliving and confirming our own predictions; by observing
the progress and returns of comets, with the changes of motion
in the sun, moon, and stars!"
I enlarged upon many other topics, which the natural desire
of endless life, and sublunary happiness, could easily furnish
me with. When I had ended, and the sum of my discourse had
been intrepreted, as before, to the rest of the company, there
was a good deal of talk among them in the language of the
country, not without some laughter at my expense. At last, the
same gentleman who had been my interpreter, said, “he was
desired by the rest to set me right in a few mistakes, which I
had fallen into through the common imbecility of human nature,
and upon that allowance was less answerable for them. That
this breed of struldbrugs was peculiar to their country, for there
were no such people either in Balnibarbi or Japan, where he
had the honor to be ambassador from his majesty, and found
the natives in both those kingdoms very hard to believe that
the fact was possible: and it appeared from my astonishment
when he first mentioned the matter to me, that I received it as
a thing wholly new, and scarcely to be credited. That in the
two kingdoms above mentioned, where during his residence he
had conversed very much, he observed long life to be the uni-
versal desire and wish of mankind. That whoever had one
foot in the grave was sure to hold back the other as strongly as
he could. That the oldest had still hopes of living one day
longer, and looked on death as the greatest evil, from which
অবক
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
247
nature always prompted him to retreat. Only in this island of
Luggnagg the appetite for living was not so eager, from the
continual example of the struldbrugs before their eyes.
"That the system of living contrived by me, was unreason-
able and unjust; because it supposed a perpetuity of youth,
health, and vigor, which no man could be so foolish to hope,
however extravagant he may be in his wishes.* That the
question therefore was not, whether a man would choose
to be always in the prime of youth, attended with prosperity
and health; but how he would pass a perpetual life under
all the usual disadvantages which old age brings along with
it; for although few men will avow their desires of being immor-
tal, upon such hard conditions, yet in the two kingdoms before
mentioned, of Balnibarbi and Japan, he observed that every
man desired to put off death some time longer, let it approach
ever so late; and he rarely heard of any man who died willingly,
except he were incited by the extremity of grief or torture.
And he appealed to me, whether in those countries I had trav-
elled, as well as my own, I had not observed the same general
disposition." †
After this preface, he gave me a particular account of the
truldbrugs among them. He said "they commonly acted like
nortals till about thirty years old; after which, by degrees,
they grew melancholy and dejected, increasing in both till they
came to fourscore. This he learned from their own confession;
for otherwise, there not being above two or three of that species
born in an age, they were too few to form a general observation
by. When they came to fourscore years, which is reckoned
the extremity of living in this country, they had not only all the
follies and infirmities of other old men, but many more, which
arose from the dreadful prospect of never dying. They were
not only opinionative, peevish, covetous, morose, vain, talka-
tive; but incapable of friendship, and dead to all natural affec-
*To this it may possibly be objected, that the perpetuity of youth, health, and vigor,
would be less a prodigy than the perpetuity of life in a body subject to gradual decay, and
might therefore be hoped without greater extravagance of folly; but the sentiment here ex-
pressed is that of a being to whom immortality though not perpetual youth was familiar,
and in whom the wish of perpetual youth only would have been extravagant because that
only appeared from facts to be impossible.-Hawkesworth.
If it be said, that although the folly of desiring life to be prolonged under the disad-
vantages of old age, is here finely exposed; yet the desire of terrestrial immortality, upon
terms on which alone in the nature of things it is possible, an exemption from disease, acci-
dent, and decay, is tacitly allowed: it may be answered, that as we grow old by impercep
tible degrees, so for the most part we grow old without repining; and every man is ready te
profess himself willing to die, when he shall be overtaken by the decrepitude of age in some
future period: yet when every other eye sees that this period is arrived, he is still tenacious
of life, and murmurs at the condition upon which he received his existence. To reconcile
old age therefore to the thoughts of a dissolution, appears to be all that was necessary in a
moral writer for practical purposes.-Hawkesworth.
248
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
tion, which never descended below their grandchildren. Envy,
and impotent desires, are their prevailing passions. But those
objects against which their envy seems principally directed,
are the vices of the younger sort, and the deaths of the old.
By reflecting on the former, they find themselves cut off from
all possibility of pleasure; and whenever they see a funeral
they lament and repine that others are gone to a harbor of rest,
to which they themselves never can hope to arrive. They have no
remembrance of anything but what they learned and observed
in their youth and middle age, and even that is very imperfect;
and for the truth or particulars of any fact it is safer to de-
pend on common tradition, than upon the best recollections.
The least miserable among them appear to be those who turn to
dotage, and entirely lose their memories; these meet with more
pity and assistance, because they want many bad qualities
which abound in others. *
“If a struldbrug happen to marry one of his own kind, the
marriage is dissolved of course, by the courtesy of the kingdom
as soon as the younger of the two comes to be fourscore; for the
law thinks it a reasonable indulgence, that those who are con-
demned without any fault of their own to a perpetual continu-
ance in the world, should not have their misery doubled by the
load of a wife.
"As soon as they have completed the term of eighty years
they are looked on as dead in law; their heirs immediately
succeed to their estates; only a small pittance is reserved for
their support; and the poor ones are maintained at the public
charge. After that period they are held incapable of any em-
ployment of trust or profit; they cannot purchase lands, or
take leases; neither are they allowed to be witnesses in any
cause, either civil or criminal, not even for the decision of meers
and bounds.
"At ninety, they lose their teeth and hair: they have at
that age no distinction of taste, but eat and drink whatever they
can get, without relish or appetite. The diseases they were
subject to still continue, without increasing or diminishing. In
talking they forget the common appellation of things, and the
names of persons, even of those who are their nearest friends
and relations. For the same reason, they never can amuse
themselves with reading, because their memory will not serve
* In this melancholy picture, Swift shadows forth the presentiment of his own helpless
old age, by which he was continually haunted: the effect of this description of the struld-
brugs is very saddening, and could only have been written by a person who anticipated a
wretched old asp
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
249
to carry them from the beginning of a sentence to the end; and
by this defect, they are deprived of the only entertainment
whereof they might otherwise be capable.
The language of this country being always upon the flux,
the struldbrugs of one age do not understand those of another;
neither are they able, after two hundred years, to hold any con-
versation (farther than by a few general words) with their neigh-
bors the mortals; and thus they lie under the disadvantage of
living like foreigners in their own country."
""
This was the account given me of the struldbrugs as near as
I can remember. I afterwards saw five or six of different ages,
the youngest not above two hundred years old, who were brought
to me at several times by some of my friends: but although they
were told "that I was a traveller, and had seen all the world,'
they had not the least curiosity to ask me a question; only de-
sired "I would give them slumskudask, or a token of remem
brance;" which is a modest way of begging, to avoid the law,
that strictly forbids it, because they are provided for by the
public, although indeed with a very scanty allowance.
They are despised and hated by all sorts of people. When
one of them is born it is reckoned ominous, and their birth
is recorded very particularly: so that you may know their age
by consulting the register, which, however, has not been kept
above a thousand years past, or at least has been destroyed by
time or public disturbances. But the usual way of computing
how old they are, is by asking them what kings or great person
they can remember, and then consulting history; for infallibly
the last prince in their mind did not begin his reign after they
were fourscore years old.
They were the most mortifying sights I ever beheld; and
the women were more horrible than the men. Besides the us-
ual deformities in extreme old age, they acquired an additional
ghastliness, in proportion to their number of years, which is not
to be described; and among half a dozen, I soon distinguished
which was the eldest, although there was not above a century
or two between them.
The reader will easily believe, that from what I had heard
and seen my keen appetite for perpetuity of life was much
abated. I grew heartily ashamed of the pleasing visions I had
formed; and thought no tyrant could invent a death, into which
I would not run with pleasure, from such a life.
The king heard of all that had passed between me and my
friends upon this occasion, and rallied me very pleasantly;
wishing I could send a couple of struidhrugs to my own country,
250
GÜLLIVER'S TRAVELS.
to arm our people against the fear of death ;* but this, it seems,
is forbidden by the fundamental laws of the kingdom, or else I
should have been well content with the trouble and expense of
transporting them.
I could not but agree, that the laws of this kingdom relative
to the struldbrugs were founded upon the strongest reasons, and
such as any other country would be under the necessity of en-
acting, in the like circumstances. Otherwise, as avarice is the
necessary consequent of old age, those immortals would in
time become proprietors of the whole nation and engross the
civil power, which, for want of abilities to manage, must end in
the ruin of the public.
CHAPTER XI.
THE AUTHOR LEAVES LUGGNAGG, AND SAILS TO JAPAN-FROM
THENCE HE RETURNS IN A DUTCH SHIP TO AMSTERDAM, and
FROM AMSTERDAM TO ENGLAND.
JUDGING this account of the struldbrugs might be some en-
tertainment to the reader, because it seems to be a little out of
the common way; at least I do not remember to have met the
like in any book of travels that has come to my hands: and if
I am deceived, my excuse must be, that it is necessary for trav-
ellers who describe the same country, very often to agree in
dwelling on the same particulars, without deserving the censure.
of having borrowed or transcribed from those who wrote before
them.
There is indeed a perpetual commerce between this king-
dom and the great empire of Japan; and it is very probable,
that the Japanese authors may have given some account of the
struldbrugs; but my stay in Japan was so short, and I was so
entirely a stranger to the language, that I was not qualified to
make any inquiries. But I hope the Dutch, upon this notice,
will be curious and able enough to supply my defects.
His majesty having often pressed me to accept some em-
ployment in his court, and finding me absolutely determined to
* Perhaps it may not be wholly useless to remark that the sight of a struldbrug would
no otherwise arm those against the fear of death, who have no hope beyond it, than a man
is armed against the fear of breaking limbs, who jumps out of a window when his house
is on fire.-Hawkesworth.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
251
return to my native country, was pleased to give me his license
to depart; and honored me with a letter of recommendation un-
der his own hand, to the Emperor of Japan. He likewise pre-
sented me with four hundred and forty-four large pieces of gold
(this nation delighted in even numbers), and a red diamond,
which I sold in England for eleven hundred pounds.
On the 6th of May, 1709, I took a solemn leave of his ma-
jesty, and all my friends. This prince was so gracious as to
order a guard to conduct me to Glanguenstald, which is a royal
port to the south-west part of the island. In six days I found
a vessel ready to carry me to Japan; and spent fifteen days in
the voyage. We landed at a small port-town called Xamoschi,
situated on the south-east part of Japan; the town lies on the
western point, where there is a narrow strait leading northward
into a long arm of the sea, upon the north-west part of which
Yedo, the metropolis, stands. At landing I showed the custom-
house officers my letter from the king of Luggnagg to his im-
perial majesty. They knew the seal perfectly well; it was as
broad as the palm of my hand. The impression was, "A king
lifting up a lame beggar from the earth." The magistrates of
the town, hearing of my letter, received me as a public minister;
they provided me with carriages and servants, and bore my
charges to Yedo, where I was admitted to an audience, and de-
livered my letter, which was opened with great ceremony, and
explained to the emperor by an interpreter; who then gave me
notice, by his majesty's order, "that I should signify my re-
quest, and whatever it were, it should be granted, for the sake
of his royal brother of Luggnagg.' This interpreter was a
person employed to transact affairs with the Hollanders; he
soon conjectured, by my countenance, that I was an European,
and therefore repeated his majesty's commands in Low Dutch,
which he spoke perfectly well. I answered, as I had before
determined, “that I was a Dutch merchant, shipwrecked in a
very remote country, whence I had travelled by sea and land to
Luggnagg, and then took shipping for Japan; where I knew
my countrymen often traded, and with some of these I hoped
to get an opportunity of returning into Europe: I therefore
most humbly entreated his royal favor, to give order that I
should be conducted in safety to Nangasac." To this I added
another petition, "that for the sake of my patron the king of
Luggnagg, his majesty would condescend to excuse my perform-
ing the ceremony imposed on my countrymen, of trampling
upon the crucifix; because I had been thrown into this kingdom
by my misfortunes, without any intention of trading." When
""
3、
252
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
this latter petition was interpreted to the emperor, he seemed
a little surprised; and said, "he believed I was the first of my
countrymen who ever made any scruple in this point; and that
he began to doubt whether I was a real Hollander, or not; but
rather suspected I must be a Christian. However, for the rea-
sons I had offered, but chiefly to gratify the king of Luggnagg
by an uncommon mark of his favor, he would comply with the
singularity of my humor; but the affair must be managed with
dexterity, and his officers should be commanded to let me pass,
as it were by forgetfulness; for he assured me, that if the se-
cret should be discovered by my countrymen the Dutch, they
would cut my throat on the voyage." I returned my thanks,
by the interpreter, for so an unusual a favor; and some troops
being at that time on the march to Nangasac, the commanding
officer had orders to convey me safe thither, with particular in-
structions about the business of the crucifix.
On the 9th of June, 1709, I arrived at Nangasac, after a
very long and troublesome journey. I soon fell into the com-
pany of some Dutch sailors belonging to the Amboyna, of Am-
sterdam, a stout ship of 450 tons. I had lived long in Hol-
land, pursuing my studies at Leyden, and I spoke Dutch well.
The seamen soon knew whence I came last; they were curious
to inquire into my voyages and course of life. I made up a
story as short and probable as I could, but concealed the great-
est part. I knew many persons in Holland; I was able to in-
vent names for my parents, whom I pretended to be obscure
people in the province of Guelderland. I would have given
the captain (one Theodorus Vangrult) what he pleased to ask
for my voyage to Holland; but understanding I was a surgeon,
he was contented to take half the usual rate, on condition that
I would serve him in the way of my calling. Before we took
shipping, I was often asked by some of the crew, "whether I
had performed the ceremony above mentioned?" I evaded
the question by general answers; "that I had satisfied the em-
peror and court in all particulars." However, a malicious rogue
of a skipper went to an officer, and pointing to me, told him,
"I had not yet trampled on the crucifix;" but the other, who
had received instructions to let me pass, gave the rascal twenty
strokes on the shoulders with a bamboo; after which I was no
more troubled with such questions.
Nothing happened worth mentioning in this voyage. We
sailed with a fair wind to the Cape of Good Hope, where we
stayed only to take in fresh water. On the 10th of April, 1710,
we arrived safe at Amsterdam, having lost only three men by
1
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
253
sickness on the voyage, and a fourth, who fell from the fore-
mast into the sea, not far from the coast of Guinea. From Am-
sterdam I soon after set sail for England, in a small vessel
belonging to that city.
On the 16th of April, we put in at the Downs. I landed
next morning, and saw once more my native country, after an
absence of five years and six months complete. I went straight
to Redriff, where I arrived the same day at two in the afternoon,
and found my wife and family in good health.
APPENDIX TO LAPUTA.
Ballad
ON THE SOUTH SEA SCHEME.
BY DEAN SWIFT.
This ballad was written to expose the mania for stock-jobbing and speculation which pre-
vailed in 1720, and elucidates some of the schemes satirized in the description of the
Academy of Lagado.
YE wise philosophers, explain
What magic makes our money rise,
When dropp'd into the Southern main;
Or do these jugglers cheat our eyes?
Put in your money, fairly told,
Presto! begone !-'tis here again:
Ladies and gentlemen, behold,
Here's every piece as big as ten!
Thus, in a basin drop a shilling,
Then fill the vessel to the brim,
You shall observe, as you are filling,
The ponderous metal seems to swim.
C
It rises both in bulk and height,
Behold it swelling like a sop;
The liquid medicine cheats your sight,-
Behold it mounted to the top.
*In stock three hundred thousand pound,
I have in view a lord's estate;
My manors all contiguous round,
A coach and six, and served in plate!"
Thus the deluded bankrupt raves,
Puts all upon a desperate bet,
Then plunges in the Southern waves,
Dipped over head and ears-in debt.
(agg
230
APPENDIX TO LAPUTA
So, by a calenture misled,
The mariner with rapture sees
On the smooth ocean's azure bed,
Enamelled fields and verdant trees.
With eager haste he longs to rove
In that fantastic scene, and thinks
It must be some enchanted grove,
And in he leaps, and down he sinks.
Five hundred chariots, just bespoke,
Are sunk in these devouring waves,-
The horses drown'd, the harness broke,
And here the owners find their graves.
Like Pharaoh, by directors led;
They with their spoils went safe before!
His chariots tumbling out the dead,
Lay shatter'd on the Red Sea shore.
Raised up on Hope's aspiring plumes,
The young adventurer o'er the deep,
An eagle's flight and state assumes,
And scorns the middle-way to keep.
On paper wings he takes his flight,
With wax the father bound them fast;
The wax is melted by the height,
And down the towering boy is cast.
A moralist might here explain
The rashness of the Cretan youth,-
Describe his fall into the main,
And from a fable form a truth
His wings are his paternal rent,
He melts the wax at every flame;
His credit sunk, his money spent,
In Southern Seas he leaves his name,
Inform us, you that best can tell,
Why in yon dangerous gulf profound,
Where hundreds and where thousands fell,
Fools chiefly float, the wise are drown'd?
So have I seen, from Severn's brink,
A flock of geese jump down together,
Swim where the bird of Jove would sink,
And swimming, never wet a feather.
But I affirm 'tis false, in fact,
Directors better know their tools;
We see the nation's credit cracked,
Each knave has made a thousand fools.
APPENDIX TO LAPUTA.
One fool may from another win,
And then get off with money stored,
But if a sharper once comes in,
He throws at all, and sweeps the board.
As fishes on each other prey,
The great ones swallowing up the small;
So fares it in the Southern Sea,
The whale directors eat up all.
When stock is high, they come between,
Making by secondhand their offers,
Then cunningly retire unseen,
With each a million in his coffers.
So when upon a moonshine night,
An ass was drinking at a stream,
A cloud arose and stopped the light,
By intercepting every beam.
The day of judgment will be soon,
Cries out a sage among the crowd,
An ass has swallowed up the moon-
The moon lay safe behind a cloud.
Each poor subscriber to the sea,
Sinks down at once, and there he lies;
Directors fall as well as they,
Their fall is but a trick to rise.
So fishes, rising from the main,
Can soar with moistened wings on high;
The moisture dried, they sink again,
And dip their fins again to fly.
Undone at play, the female troops
Come here their losses to retrieve
Ride o'er the waves in spacious hoops,
Like Lapland witches in a sieve.
Thus Venus to the sea descends,
As poets feign; but where's the moral ?
It shows the queen of love intends
To search the sea for pearl and coral.
The sea is richer than the land,
I heard it from my grannam's mouth;
Which now I clearly understand,
For by the sea she meant the south.
Thus, by directors, we are told,
Pray, gentlemen, believe your eyes;
Our ocean's covered o'er with gold,
Look round and see how thick it lies;
457
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APPENDIX TO LAPUTA.
"We, gentlemen, are your assisters,
We'll come and hold you by the chin:
Alas! all is not gold that glisters,
Ten thousands sink by leaping in.
Oh! would those patriots be so kind,
Here in the deep to wash their hands,
Then like Pactolus, we should find,
The sea indeed had golden sands.
A shilling in the bath you fling:
The silver takes a nobler hue,
By magic virtue in the spring,
And seems a guinea to your view.
But as a guinea will not pass
At market for a farthing more,
Shown through a multiplying-glass,
Than what it always did before;
So cast in the Southern seas,
Or view it through a jobber's bill-
Put on what spectacles you please,
Your guinea's but a guinea still.
One night a fool into a brook,
Thus from a hillock looking down,
The golden stars for guineas took,
And silver Cynthia for a crown.
The point he could no longer doubt:
He ran, he leaped into the flood;
There sprawl'd awhile, and scarce got out,
All cover'd o'er with slime and mud.
"Upon the water cast thy bread,
And after many days thou'lt find it;
But gold upon this ocean spread,
Shall sink, and leave no mark behind it
There is a gulf where thousands fell,
Here all the bold adventurers came,
A narrow sound, though deep as hell;-
Change Alley is the dreadful name.
Nine times a day it ebbs and flows,
Yet he that on the surface lies,
Without a pilot seldom knows
The time it falls or when 'twill rise.
Subscribers here by thousands float,
And jostle one another down;
Each paddling in his leaky boat,
And there they fish for gold, and drown
APPENDIX TO LAPUTA.
259
Now buried in the depths below,
Now mounted up to heaven again,
They reel and stagger to and fro,
At their wits' end, like drunken men.
Meantime, secure on Garraway cliffs,
A savage race, by shipwrecks fed,
Lie waiting for the founder'd skiffs,
And strip the bodies of the dead.
But these, you say, are fictious lies,
From some malicious Tory's brain;
For where directors get a prize,
The Swiss and Dutch whole millions drain.
Thus, when by rooks a lord is plied,
Some cully often wins a bet,
By venturing on the cheating side,
Though not into the secret let.
While some build castles in the air,
Directors build them in the seas;
Subscribers plainly see them there,-
For fools will see as wise men please.
Thus oft by mariners are shown-
Unless the men of Kent are liars--
Earl Godwin's castles overthrown,
And palace roofs and steeple spires.
Mark where the sly directors creep,
Nor to the shore approach too nigh!
The monsters nestle in the deep,
To seize you in your passing by.
Then, like the dogs of Nile, be wise,
Who taught by instinct how to shun
The crocodile, that lurking lies,
Run as they drink, and drinking run.
Antæus could, by magic charms,
Recover strength whene'er he fell;
Alcides held him in his arms,
And sent him up in air to hell.
Directors thrown into the sea,
Recover strength and vigor there;
But may be tamed another way,
Suspended for a while in air!
Directors! for 'tis you I warn,
By long experience we have found
What planet ruled when you were born;
We see you never can be drown'ą.
60
APPENDIX TO LAPUTA.
OMS
eware, nor over-bulky grow,
S
Nor come within your cully's reach
For if the sea should sink so low,
To leave you dry upon the beach,
You'll owe your ruin to your bulk;
Your foes already waiting stand,
To tear you like a founder'd hulk,
While you lie helpless on the strand.
Thus, when a whale has lost the tide,
The coasters crowd to seize the spoil;
The monster into parts divide,
And strip the bones, and melt the oil.
Ol may some western tempest sweep
These locusts whom our fruits have fed,
That plague, directors, to the deep,
Driven from the South Sea to the Red
May He, whom Nature's laws obey,
Who lifts the poor and sinks the proud,
Quiet the raging of the sea,
And still the madness of the crowd!"
But never shall our isle have rest
Till those devouring swine run down,
The devils leaving the possessed,-
And headlong in the waters drown.
P
The nation then, too late, will find,
Computing all their cost and trouble,
Directors' promises but wind,
South Sea at best a mighty bubble.
The second ballad, to which allusion is made on page 218, is by an unknown author
it produced a great effect in its time, and possesses too much merit to be allowed to sink
into oblivion. It is copied from a broadside in a private collection.
A SOUTH SEA BALLAD;
OR,
MERRY REMARKS UPON EXCHANGE ALLEY BUBBLES.
Re
TO A NEW TUNE, CALLED THE GRAND ELIXIR; OR, THE PHILOS
OPHER'S STONE DISCOVERED.”
L
IN London stands a famous pile,
And near that pile an Alley,
Where many crowds for riches toil,
And wisdom stoops to folly.
Here sad and joyful, high and low,
Court Fortune for her graces,
And as she smiles or frowns, they show
Their gestures and grimaces.
II.
Here stars and garters do appear
Among our lords the rabble;
To buy and sell, to see and hear
The Jews and Gentiles squabble,
Here crafty courtiers are too wise
For those who trust to Fortune;
They see the cheat with clearer eyes,
Who peep behind the curtain.
IIL
Our greatest ladies hither come,
And ply in chariots daily;
Oft pawn their jewels for a sum
To venture in the Alley.
Young harlots, too, from Drury Lane,
Approach the 'Change in coaches,
To fool away the gold they gain
By their obscene debauches.
(04)
863
APPENDIX TO LAPUTA.
IV.
ong heads may thrive by sober rules,
Because they think, and drink not,
But head-longs are our thriving fools,
Who only drink and think not.
The lucky rogues, like spaniel dogs,
Leap into South Sea water,
And there they fish for golden frogs,
Not caring what comes arter.
4.
"Tis said, that alchemists of old
Could turn a brazen kettle,
Or leaden cistern, into gold,
That noble, tempting metal;
But if it here may be allowed
To bring in great and small things,
Our cunning South Sea, like a god,
Turns nothing into all things.
VI.
What need have we of Indian wealth,
Or commerce with our neighbors ?
Our constitution is in health,
And riches crown our labors.
Our South Sea ships have golden shrouds,➡
They bring us wealth, 'tis granted;
But lodge their treasure in the clouds,
To hide it, till 'tis wanted.
VII.
O Britain! bless thy present state,
Thou only happy nation,
So oddly rich, so madly great
Since bubbles came in fashion.
Successful rakes exert their pride,
And count their airy millions,
While homely drabs in coaches ride,
Brought up to town on pillions.
VIII.
Few men who follow reason's rules
Grow fat with South Sea diet;
Young rattles and unthinking fools
Are those who flourish by it:
Old musty jades, and pushing blades,
Who've least consideration,
Grow rich apace; while wiser heads
Are struck with admiration.
*
APPENDIX TO LAPUTA.
263
A race of men who, t'other day,
Lay crush'd beneath disasters,
Are now by stock brought into play,
And made our lords and masters.
But should our South Sea Babel fall,
What numbers should be frowning!
The losers then must ease their gall
By hanging or by drowning.
X.
Five hundred millions, notes and bonds,
Our stocks are worth in value;
But neither lie in goods, or lands,
Or money, let me tell you.
Yet though our foreign trade is lost,
Of mighty wealth we vapor;
When all the riches that we boast
Consist in scraps of paper.
The following humorous attack on the Report of the Secret Com-
mittee in Atterbury's case has been referred to more than once
in the preceding pages; it completes the satire directed against
the Report in the description of the Academy of Lagado, page
230.
UPON THE HORRID PLOT.
DISCOVERED BY HARLEQUIN, THE BISHOP OF ROCHES-
TER'S FRENCH DOG.
IN A DIALOGUE BETWEEN A WHIG AND TORY.
I ASK'D a Whig the other night
How came the wicked plot to light?
He answer'd that a dog, of late,
Inform'd a minister of state.
Said I, from that I nothing know
For are not all informers so?
A villain who his friend betrays,
We style him by no other phrase;
And so a perjured dog denotes
Porter, and Prendergast, and Oates,
And forty others I could name.
WHIG. But sir, they say the dog was lame?
TORY.-A weighty argument indeed:
Your evidence was lame;-proceed,
Come, help your lame dog o'er the style.
WHIG.-Sir, you mistake me all the while,-
I mean a dog without a joke,
Can howl, and bark, but never spoke.
TORY.-I'm still to seek which dog you mean,
Whether cur Plunkett, or whelp Skean,*
de
*Plunkett and Skean, or Skinner, were two of the principal witnesses be-
fore the Privy Council.
(264)
APPENDIX TO LAPUTA.
265
*
An English or an Irish hound,
Or t'other puppy that was drown'd;*
Or Mason, that abandon'd bitch; t
Then pray be free and tell me which:
For every stander-by was marking
That all the noise they made was barking.
You pay them well: the dogs have got
Their dogs' heads in a porridge pot:
And 'twas but just, for wise men say
That every dog must have his day.
Dog Walpole laid a quart of nog on't,
He'd either make a hog or dog on't,
And look'd, since he has got his wish,
As if he had thrown down a dish;
Yet thus I dare foretell you from it,
He'll soon return to his own vomit.
WHIG. Besides this horrid plot was found
By Neynoe after he was drown'd.
TORY.-Why, then the proverb is not right,
Since you can teach dead dogs to bite.
WHIG.-I proved my proposition full,
But Jacobites are strangely dull.
Now let me tell you plainly, sir,
Our witness is a real cur;
A dog of spirit for his years,
Has twice two legs, two hanging ears;
His name is Harlequin, I wot,
And that's a name in every plot;
Resolved to save the British nation,
Though French by birth and education;
His correspondence, plainly dated,
Was all decipher'd and translated;
His answers were exceeding pretty,
Before the secret wise Committee;
Confess'd as plain as he could bark,
Then with his forefoot set his mark.
TORY.-Then all this while I have been bubbled,
I thought it was a dog in doublet;
The matter now no longer sticks,
For statesmen never want dog-tricks.
But since it was a real cur,
And not a dog in metaphor,
I give you joy of the report
That he's to have a place at court.
WHIG.—Yes, and a place he will get rich in,➡
A turnspit in the royal kitchen.
Sir, to be plain, I tell you what,
We had occasion for the plot:
And when we found the dog begin it,
We guess'd the bishop's foot was in it.
* Neynoe, whose evidence pressed very hard on the Bishop, was drown'd in attempt.
ing his escape. His examinations before the Privy Council were received as evidence
before the Lords on the Bill of Attainder.
+ Mrs. Mason's evidence was of far less importance than Swift intimates.
#66
APPENDIX TO LAPUTA.
TORY.-I own it was a dangerous project
But you have proved it by dog-logic.
Sure such intelligence between
A dog and bishop ne'er were seen;
Till you began to change the breed,
Your bishops all are dags indeed.
A VOYAGE TO
THE COUNTRY OF THE HOUYHNHNMS.
CHAPTER I.
THE AUTHOR SETS OUT AS CAPTAIN OF A SHIP HIS MEN
CONSPIRE AGAINST HIM, CONFINE HIM A LONG TIME TO
HIS CABIN, AND SET HIM ON SHORE IN AN UNKNOWN
LAND HE TRAVELS UP INTO THE COUNTRY-THE YAHOOS,
A STRANGE SORT OF ANIMAL, DESCRIBED-THE AUTHOR
MEETS TWO HOUYHNHNMS.
JUSTLY as I may be blamed for a rambling disposition, I
must confess that my love of adventure was not extinguished
by the dangers recited in the preceding parts of my travels. I
continued at home with my wife and children, about five
months, in a very happy condition, if I could have learned the
lesson of knowing when I was well. I left my poor wife big
with child, and accepted an advantageous offer made me to
be captain of the Adventure, a stout merchantman of 350 tons :
for I understood navigation well, and being grown weary of a
surgeon's employment at sea, which, however, I could exercise
upon occasion, I took a skilful young man of that calling, one
Robert Purefoy, into my ship. We set sail from Portsmouth,
upon the 7th day of September, 1710; on the 14th, we met
with Captain Pocock, of Bristol, at Teneriffe, who was going
to the bay of Campechy to cut logwood. On the 16th, he was
parted from us by a storm: I heard since my return, that his
ship foundered, and none escaped but one cabin-boy. He was
an honest man, and a good sailor, but a little too positive in
his own opinions, which was the cause of his destruction, as it
has been of several others; for if he had followed my advice,
he might have been safe at home with his family at this time
as well as myself.
267)
268
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
*
I had several men died in my ship of calentures, so that I
was forced to get recruits out of Barbadoes and the Leeward
Islands, where I touched, by the direction of the merchants
who employed me; which I had soon too much cause to repent;
for I found afterwards, that most of them had been buccaneers.
I had fifty hands on board, and my orders were, that I should
trade with the Indians in the South Sea, and make what dis-
coveries I could. These rogues, whom I had picked up, de-
bauched my other men, and they all formed a conspiracy to
seize the ship, and secure me; which they did one morning,
rushing into my cabin, and binding me hand and foot, threat,
ening to throw me overboard, if I offered to stir. I told them,
"I was their prisoner and would submit." This they made me
swear to do, and then they unbound me, only fastening one of
my legs with a chain, near my bed, and placed a sentry at my
door with his piece charged, who was commanded to shoot me
dead, if I attempted my liberty. They sent me down victual,
and drink, and took the government of the ship to themselves
Their design was to turn pirates, and plunder the Spaniards,
which they could not do till they got more men. But first they
resolved to sell the goods in the ship, and then go to Mada-
gascar for recruits, several among them having died since my
confinement. They sailed many weeks, and traded with the
Indians; but I knew not what course they took, being kept &
close prisoner in my cabin, and expecting nothing less than to
be murdered, as they often threatened me.
Upon the 9th of May, 1711, one James Welch came down te
my cabin, and said "he had orders from the captain to set mo
ashore." I expostulated with him, but in vain ; neither would
he so much as tell me who their new captain was. They forced
me into the long-boat, letting me put on my best suit of clothes,
which were as good as new, and take a small bundle of linen,
but no arms, except my hanger; and they were so civil as not
to search my pockets, into which I conveyed what money I had
with some other little necessaries. They rowed about a league,
and then set me down on a strand. I desired them to tell me
what country it was, They all swore, "they knew no more
than myself;" but said, "that the captain (as they called
him) was resolved, after they had sold the lading, to get rid of
me in the first place where they could discover land." They
pushed off immediately, advising me to make haste for fear of
being overtaken by the tide, and so bade me farewell.
In this desolate condition I advanced forward, and soon
* Certain pirates, that infested the West Indies, were so called.--Hawkesworth.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
269
upon firm ground, where I sat down on a bank to rest my-
s, and consider what I had best do. When I was a little
refreshed, I went up into the country, resolving to deliver my-
self to the first savages I should meet, and purchase my life
from them by some bracelets, glass rings, and other toys, which
sailors usually provide themselves with in those voyages, and
whereof I had some about me. The land was divided by long
rows of trees, not regularly planted, but naturally growing;
there was great plenty of grass, and several fields of oats. Í
walked very circumspectly, for fear of being surprised, or
suddenly shot with an arrow from behind, or on either
side. I fell into a beaten road, where I saw many tracks of
human feet, and some of cows, but most of horses. At last I
beheld several animals in a field, and one or two of the same
kind sitting in trees. Their shape was very singular and de-
formed, which a little discomposed me, so that I lay down be-
hind a thicket to observe them better. Some of them coming
forward near the place where I lay, gave me an opportunity of
distinctly marking their form. Their heads and breasts were
covered with a thick hair, some frizzled, and others lank; they
had beards like goats, and a long ridge of hair down their
backs, and the foreparts of their legs and feet; but the rest of
their bodies was bare, so that I might see their skins, which
were of a brown buff color. They had no tails, nor any hair
at all on their buttocks, except about the anus; which, I pre-
sume, nature had placed there to defend them, as they sat on
the ground; for this posture they used, as well as lying down,
and often stood on their hind feet. They climbed high trees
as nimbly as a squirrel, for they had strong extended claws be-
fore and behind, terminating in sharp points, and hooked.
They would often spring, and bound, and leap, with prodigious
agility. The females were not so large as the males; they had
long lank hair on their head, but none on their faces, nor any-
thing more than a sort of down on the rest of their bodies, ex-
cept about the anus and pudenda. The dugs hung between
their fore-feet, and often reached almost to the ground as they
walked. The hair of both sexes was of several colors, brown,
red, black, and yellow. Upon the whole, I never beheld, in
all my travels, so disagreeable an animal, or one against
which I naturally conceived so great an antipathy; so that
thinking I had seen enough, full of contempt and aversion, I
got up, and pursued the beaten road, hoping it might direct
me to the cabin of some Indian. I had not gone far, when I
met one of those creatures full in my way, and coming up
270
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
directly to me. The ugly monster, when he saw me, distorted
several ways every feature of his visage, and stared, as at an
object he had never seen before; then approaching nearer,
lifted up his fore-paw, whether out of curiosity or mischief I
could not tell; but I drew my hanger, and gave him a good
blow with the flat side of it, for I durst not strike with the
edge, fearing the inhabitants might be provoked against me,
if they should come to know that I had killed or maimed any
of their cattle. When the beast felt the smart, he drew back,
and roared so loud, that a herd of at least forty came flocking
about me from the next field, howling and making odious faces;
but I ran to the body of a tree, and leaning my back against
it, kept them off by waving my hanger. Several of this cursed
brood, getting hold of the branches behind, leaped up into the .
tree, whence they began to discharge their excrements on my
head; however, I escaped pretty well by sticking close to the
stem of the tree, but was almost stifled with the filth, which
fell about me on every side.
In the midst of this distress, I observed all to run away on
a sudden as fast as they could; at which I ventured to leave
the tree, and pursue the road, wondering what it was that could
put them into this fright. But looking on my left hand, I saw
a horse walking softly in the field; which my persecutors hav-
ing sooner discovered, was the cause of their flight. The horse
started a little, when he came near me, but soon recovering
himself, looked full in my face with manifest tokens of wonder.
He viewed my hands and feet, walking round me several times.
I would have pursued my journey, but he placed himself directly
in the way, yet looking with a very mild aspect, never offering
the least violence. We stood gazing at each other for some
time; at last I took the boldness to reach my hand towards his
neck with a design to stroke it, using the common style and
whistle of jockeys, when they are going to handle a strange
horse, But this animal seemed to receive my civilities with
disdain, shook his head, and bent his brows, softly raising up
his right forefoot to remove my hand. Then he neighed three
or four times, but in so different a cadence, that I almost be
gan to think he was speaking to himself, in some language of
his own.
While he and I were thus employed, another horse came
up; who applying himself first in a very formal manner, they
gently struck each other's right hoof before, neighing several
times by turns, and varying the sound, which seemed to be
almost articulate. They went some paces off, as if it were to
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
271
confer together, walking side by side, backward and forward,
like persons deliberating upon some affair of weight, but often
turning their eyes towards me, as it were to watch that I might
not escape. I was amazed to see such actions and behavior in
brute beasts; and concluded with myself, that if the inhabi-
tants of this country were endued with a proportionable degree
of reason, they must needs be the wisest people upon earth.
This thought gave me so much comfort, that I resolved to go
forward, until I could discover some house or village, or meet
with any of the natives, leaving the two horses to discourse to-
gether as they pleased. But the first, who was a dapple gray,
observing me to steal off, neighed after me in so expressive a
tone, that I fancied myself to understand what he meant ;
whereupon I turned back, and came near to him, to expect his
farther commands, but concealing my fear as much as I could;
for I began to be in some pain how this adventure might termi-
nate; and the reader will easily believe I did not much like my
present situation.
The two horses came up close to me, looking with great
earnestness upon my face and hands. The gray steed rubbed
my hat all round with his right fore hoof, and discomposed it
so much that I was forced to adjust it better by taking it off,
and settling it again; whereat both he and his companion (who
was a brown bay) appeared to be much surprised; the latter
felt the lappet of my coat, and finding it to hang loose about
me, they both looked with new signs of wonder. He stroked
my right hand, seeming to admire the softness and color; but
he squeezed it so hard between his hoof and his pastern, that
I was forced to roar; after which they both touched me with
all possible tenderness. They were under great perplexity
about my shoes and stockings, which they felt very often, neigh-
ing to each other, and using various gestures, not unlike those
of a philosopher, when he would attempt to solve some new
and difficult phenomenon.
Upon the whole, the behavior of these animals was so
orderly and rational, so acute and judicious, that I at last con-
cluded they must needs be magicians, who had thus metamor
phosed themselves upon some design, and seeing a stranger in
the way, resolved to divert themselves with him; or, perhaps
were really amazed at the sight of a man so very different in
habit, feature, and complexion, from those who might probably
live in so remote a climate. Upon the strength of this reason-
ing, I ventured to address them in the following manner:
"Gentlemen, if you be conjurors, as I have good cause to be-
272
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
lieve, you can understand any language; therefore I make bold
to let your worships know that I am a poor distressed English-
man, driven by his misfortunes upon your coast; and I entreat
one of you to let me ride upon his back, as if he were a real
horse, to some house or village where I can be relieved. In
return of which favor, I will make you a present of this knife
and bracelet ;" taking them out of my pocket. The two crea
tures stood silent while I spoke, seeming to listen with great
attention; and when I had ended, they neighed frequently to-
wards each other, as if they were engaged in serious conversa-
tion. I plainly observed that their language expressed the pas-
sions very well, and the words might, with little pains, be re-
solved into an alphabet more easily than the Chinese.
I could frequently distinguish the word Yahoo, which was
repeated by each of them several times; and although it was
impossible for me to conjecture what it meant, yet, while the
two horses were busy in conversation, I endeavored to practice
this word upon my tongue; and as soon as they were silent, I
boldly pronounced Yahoo, in a loud voice, imitating at the same
time, as near as I could, the neighing of a horse; at which
they were both visibly surprised, and the gray repeated the
same word twice, as if he meant to teach the right accent;
wherein I spoke after him as well as I could, and found myself
perceivably to improve every time, though very far from any
degree of perfection. Then the bay tried me with a second
word, much harder to be pronounced; but reducing it to the
English orthography may be spelt thus-Houyhnhnm. I did not
succeed in this so well as in the former; but after two or three
farther trials, I had better fortune, and they both appeared
amazed at my capacity.
After some further discourse, which I then conjectured
might relate to me, the two friends took their leaves with the
same compliment of striking each other's hoof, and the gray
made me signs that I should walk before him: wherein I thought
it prudent to comply, till I could find a better director. When
I offered to slacken my pace, he would cry khuun, hhuun. I
guessed his meaning and gave him to understand, as well as I
could, "that I was weary, and not able to walk faster; upon
which he would stand awhile to let me rest.
""
Gulliver's TRAVELS.
373
CHAPTER II.
THE AUTHOR CONDUCTED BY A HOUYHNHNM TO HIS HOUSE
-THE HOUSE DESCRIBED—THE AUTHOR'S RECEPTION-
THE FOOD OF THE HOUYHNHNMS-THE AUTHOR IN DIS-
TRESS FOR WANT OF MEAT-IS AT LAST RELIEVED-
HIS MANNER OF FEEDING IN THIS COUNTRY.
AFTER having travelled about three miles, we came to a
long kind of building, made of timber stuck in the ground, and
wattled across; the roof was low, and covered with straw. I
now began to be a little comforted; and took out some toys,
which travellers usually carry for presents to the savage In-
dians of America, and other parts, in hopes the people of the
house would be thereby encouraged to receive me kindly. The
horse made me a sign to go in first; it was a large room with a
smooth clay floor, and a rack and manger, extending the whole
ength on one side. There were three nags and two mares, not
eating, but some of them sitting down upon their hams, which
I very much wondered at; but wondered more to see the rest
employed in domestic business; these seemed but ordinary
cattle; however, this confirmed my first opinion that a people
who could so far civilize brute animals must needs excel in
wisdom all the nations of the world. The gray came in just
after, and thereby prevented any ill-treatment which the
others might have given me. He neighed to them several
times in a style of authority, and received answers.
Beyond this room there were three others, reaching the
length of the house, to which you passed through three doors,
opposite to each other, in the manner of a vista; we went
through the second room towards the third. Here the gray
walked in first, beckoning me to attend; I waited in the second
room, and got ready my presents for the master and mistress
of the house: they were two knives, three bracelets of false
pearls, a small looking-glass, and a bead necklace. The
horse neighed three or four times, and I waited to hear some
answers in a human voice, but I heard no other returns than
in the same dialect, only one or two a little shriller than his.
I began to think that this house must belong to some person
of great nōte among them, because there appeared so much
ceremony before I could gain admittance. But, that a man
*8
274
GULLIVĒR'S TRAVELS.
of quality should be served all by horses was beyond my
comprehension: I feared my brain was disturbed by my suf-
fering and misfortunes: I roused myself, and looked about me
in the room where I was left alone: this was furnished like
the first, only after a more elegant manner. I rubbed my
eyes often, but the same objects still occurred. I pinched my
arms and sides to awake myself, hoping I might be in a dream.
I then absolutely concluded that all these appearances could
be nothing else but necromancy and magic. But I had no
time to pursue these reflections, for the gray horse came to
the door, and made me a sign to follow him into the third
room, where I saw a very comely mare, together with a colt
and foal, sitting on their haunches upon mats of straw, not
unartfully made, and perfectly neat and clean.
The mare soon after my entrance rose from her mat, and
coming up close, after having nicely observed my hands and
face, gave me a most contemptuous look, and turning to the
horse, I heard the word Yahoo often repeated betwixt them;
the meaning of which I could not then comprehend; althoughi
it was the first I had learned to pronounce; but I was so011
better informed, to my everlasting mortification; for the
horse, beckoning to me with his head, and repeating the
hhuun, hhuun, as he did upon the road, which I understood
was to attend him, led me out into a kind of court, where was
another building, at some distance from the house. Here we
entered, and I saw three of those detestable creatures, which
'I first met after my landing, feeding upon roots, and the flesh
of some animals, which I afterwards found to be that of asses
and dogs, and now and then a cow, dead by accident or
disease. They were all tied by the neck with strong withes
fastened to a beam; they held their food between the claws
of their forefeet, and tore it with their teeth.
The master horse ordered a sorrel nag, one of his ser-
vants, to untie the largest of these animals, and take him into
the yard. The beast and I were brought close together, and
our countenances diligently compared both by master and
servant, who thereupon repeated several times the word
Yahoo. My horror and astonishment are not to be described,
when I observed, in this abominable animal, a perfect human
figure: the face of it indeed was flat and broad, the nose de-
pressed, the lips large, and the mouth wide; but these dif-
ferences are common to all savage nations, where the linea-
ments of the countenance are distorted by the natives suffer-
ing their infants to lie grovelling on the earth, or by carry-
ja
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
275
ing them on their backs, nuzzling with their faces against the
mother's shoulders. The forefoot of the Yahoo differed
from my hands in nothing else but the length of the nails,
the coarseness and brownness of the palms, and the hairyness
on the backs. There was the same resemblance between our
feet, with the same differences, which I knew very well,
though the horses did not, because of my shoes and stockings;
the same in every part of our bodies except as to hairyness
and color, which I have already described.
The great difficulty that seemed to stick with the two
horses, was to see the rest of my body so very different from
that of a Yahoo, for which I was obliged to my clothes,
whereof they had no conception. The sorrel nag offered me
a root, which he held (after their manner, as we shall describe
in its proper place) between his hoof and pastern: I took it in
my hand, and having smelt it, returned it to him as civilly as
I could. He brought out of the Yahoos' kennel a piece of ass's
flesh, but it smelt so offensively that I turned from it with
loathing: he then threw it to the Yahoo, by whom it was
greedily devoured. He afterwards showed me a wisp of
hay, and a fetlock full of oats; but I shook my head, to sig-
nify that neither of these were food for me. And indeed I
now apprehended that I must absolutely starve, if I did not
get to some of my own species; for as to those filthy Yahoos,
although there were few greater lovers of mankind at that
time than myself, yet I confess I never saw any sensitive
being so detestable on all accounts; and the more I came neat
them the more hateful they grew, while I stayed in that
country. This the master horse observed by my behavior,
and therefore sent the Yahoo back to his kennel. He then put
his forehoof to his mouth, at which I was much surprised,
although he did it with ease, and with a motion that appeared.
perfectly natural; and made other signs to know what I
would eat; but I could not return him such an answer as he
was able to apprehend; and if he had understood me, I did
not see how it was possible to contrive any way for finding
myself nourishment. While we were thus engaged, I
observed a cow passing by, whereupon I pointed to her, and
expressed a desire to go and milk her. This had its effect;
for he led me back into the house, and ordered a mare-servant
to open a room, where a good store of milk lay in earthen
and wooden vessels, after a very orderly and cleanly manner.
She gave me a large bowlful, of which I drank very heartily,
and found myself well refreshed.
276
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
About noon, I saw coming towards the house a kind of
vehicle drawn like a sledge by four Yahoos. There was
in it an old steed, who seemed to be of quality; he alight-
ed with his hind-feet foreward, having by accident got
a hurt in his left forefoot. He came to dine with our horse,
who received him with great civilty. They dined in the best
room, and had oats boiled in milk for the second course,
which the old horse eat warm, but the rest cold. Their
mangers were placed circular in the middle of the room, and
divided into several partitions, round which they sat on their
haunches, upon bosses of straw. In the middle was a large
rack, with angles answering to every partition of the manger;
so that each horse and mare eat their own hay, and their own
mash of oats and milk, with much decency and regularity.
The behavior of the young colt and foal appeared very
modest, and that of the master and mistress extremely cheer-
ful and complaisant to their guest. The gray ordered me to
stand by him; and much discourse passed between him and
his friend concerning me, as I found by the stranger's often
looking on me, and the frequent repetition of the word
Yahoo.
I happened to wear my gloves, which the master gray
observing, seemed perplexed, discovering signs of wonder
what I had done to my forefeet; he put his hoof three or four
times to them, as if he would signify that I should reduce
them to their former shape, which I presently did, pulling off
both my gloves, and putting them into my pocket.
This occasioned further talk, and I saw the company was
pleased with my behavior, whereof I soon found the good
effects. I was ordered to speak the few words I understood;
and while they were at dinner, the master taught me the
names for oats, milk, fire, water, and some others; which I
could readily pronounce after him, having from my youth a
great facility in learning languages.
When dinner was done, the master took me aside, and by
signs and words made me understand the concern he was in
that I had nothing to eat. Oats in their tongue are called
hlunnh. This word I pronounced two or three times; for
although I had refused them at first, yet, upon second thoughts
I considered that I could contrive to make of them a kind of
bread, which might be sufficient, with milk, to keep me
alive, till I could make my escape to some other country, and
to creatures of my own species. The horse immediately
ondered a white mare-servant of his family to bring me a
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
277
good quantity of oats in a sort of wooden tray. These I
heated before the fire, as well as I could, and rubbed them
till the husks came off, which I made a shift to winnow from
the grain: I ground and beat them between two stones, then
took water, and made them into a paste or cake, which I
toasted at the fire, and eat warm with milk. It was at first
a very insipid diet, though common enough in many parts of
Europe, but grew tolerable by time; and having been often
reduced to hard fare in my life, this was not the first experi-
ment I had made how easily nature is satisfied. And I can-
not but observe, that I never had an hour's sickness while I
stayed in this island. It is true, I sometimes made a shift to
catch a rabbit or bird, by springs made of Yahoos' hairs;
and I often gathered wholesome herbs, which I boiled and
eat as salads with my bread; and now and then, for a rarity,
I made a little butter and drank the whey. I was at first at
a great loss for salt, but custom soon reconciled me to the
want of it; and I am confident that the frequent use of salt
among us is an effect of luxury, and was first introduced only
as a provocative to drink, except where it is necessary for
preserving flesh in long voyages, or in places remote from
great markets: for we observe no animal to be fond of it
but man,* and as to myself, when I left this country, it was
a great while before I could endure the taste of it in any-
thing that I ate.
"
This is enough to say upon the subject of my diet, where-
with other travellers fill their books, as if the readers were
personally concerned whether we fare well or ill. However,
it was necessary to mention this matter, lest the world should
think it impossible that I could find sustenance for three
years in such a country, and among such inhabitants.
When it grew towards evening, the master horse ordered
a place for me to lodge in; it was but six yards from the
house, and separated from the stable of the Yahoos. Here I
got some straw, and covering myself with my own clothes,
slept very sound. But I was in a very short time better
accommodated, as the reader shall know hereafter, when I
come to treat more particularly about my way of living.
*This is a great mistake. Almost every animal is fond of salt, and thrives when it
is mingled with its food. The fattening quality of salt marshes, and the delight taken
by animals in licking salt sand, is weli known. It has been sprinkled upon musty
hay, with such advantage as to render it highly palatable to the animals which before
refused it.
278
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
CHAPTER III.
THE AUTHOR STUDIES TO LEARN THE LANGUAGE-THE
HOUY HNHNM, HIS MASTER, ASSISTS IN TEACHING HIM
-THE LANGUAGE DESCRIBED-SEVERAL HOUYHNHNMS
OF QUALITY COME OUT OF CURIOSITY TO SEE THE AU-
THOR-HE GIVES HIS MASTER A SHORT ACCOUNT OF HIS
VOYAGE.
My principal endeavor was to learn the language, which
my master (for so I shall henceforth call him), and his chil-
dren, and every servant of his house, were desirous to teach
me; for they looked upon it as a prodigy, that a brute animal
should discover such marks of a rational creature. I pointed
to everything, and inquired the name of it, which I wrote
down in my journal-book when I was alone, and corrected
my bad accent, by desiring those of the family to pronounce
it often. In this employment a sorrel nag, one of the under
servants, was very ready to assist me.
In speaking, they pronounce through the nose and throat,
and their language approaches nearest to the High Dutch or
German, of any I know in Europe; but it is much more
graceful and significant. The emperor Charles V. made
almost the same observation when he said, "that if he were
to speak to his horse, it should be in High Dutch." The
curiosity and impatience of my master were so great that
he spent many hours of his leisure to instruct me.
He was
convinced (as he afterwards told me) that I must be a Yahoo;
but my teachableness, civilty, and cleanliness, astonished him;
which were qualities altogether opposite to those animals.*
He was most perplexed about my clothes, reasoning some-
times with himself, whether they were a part of my body: for
I never pulled them off till the family were asleep, and got
them on before they waked in the morning. My master was
eager to learn "whence I came; how I acquired those
appearances of reason which I discovered in all my actions;
and to know my story from my own mouth, which he hoped
he should soon do, by the great proficiency I made in learn-
*"Qualities opposite to animals," is a strange mode of expression; it should be-
"which were qualities altogether opposite to such as belonged to those animals."--
Sheridan.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
279
-
To help
ing and pronouncing their words and sentences."
my memory, I formed all I learned into the English alphabet,
and writ the words down, with the translations. This last,
after some time, I ventured to do in my master's presence.
It cost me much trouble to explain to him what I was doing;
for the inhabitants have not the least idea of books or litera-
ture.
In about ten weeks' time I was able to understand most
of his questions; and in three months could give him some
tolerable answers. He was extremely curious to know
"from what part of the country I came, and how I was
taught to imitate a rational creature; because the Yahoos
(whom he saw I exactly resembled in my head, hands and
face, that were only visible)* with some appearance of cun-
ning, and the strongest disposition to mischief, were observed
to be the most unteachable of all brutes." I answered," that
I came over the sea from a far place, with many others of
my own kind, in a great hollow vessel made of the bodies of
trees; that my companions forced me to land on this coast,
and then left me to shift for myself." It as with some
difficulty, and by the help of many signs, that I brought him
to understand me. He replied, "that I must needs be mis-
taken, or that I said the thing which was not;" for they have
no word in their language to express lying or falsehood.
"He knew it was impossible that there could be a country
beyond the sea, or that a parcel of brutes could move a
wooden vessel whither they pleased upon water. He was
sure no Houyhnhnm alive could make such a vessel, nor
would trust Yahoos to manage it."
The word Houyhnhnm, in their tongue, signifies a horse,
and, in its etymology, the perfection of nature. I told my
master that "I was at a loss for expression, but would im-
prove as fast as I could; and hoped in a short time I should
be able to tell him wonders." He was pleased to direct his
own mare, his colt, and foal, and the servants of the family,
to take all opportunities of instructing me; and every day or
two, for two or three hours, he was at the same pains him-
self; several horses and mares of quality in the neighbor-
hood came often to our house, upon the report spread of “
wonderful Yahoo, that could speak like a Houyhnhnm, and
seemed in his words and actions to discover some glimmer-
ings of reason." These delighted to converse with me: they
a
"That were only visible "-an ambiguous phrase; it should be-"which only
were visible.” etc.—Sheridan,
280
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
put many questions and received such answers as I was able
to return. By all these advantages I made so great a
progress, that in five months from my arrival, I understood
whatever was spoken, and could express myself tolerably
well.
The Houyhnhnms, who came to visit my master out of
a design of seeing and talking with me, could hardly believe
me to be a right Yahoo, because my body had a different
covering from others of my kind. They were astonished to
observe me without the usual hair or skin, except on my head,
face, and hands; but I discovered that secret to my master
upon an accident which happened about a fortnight before.
I have already told the reader, that every night, when the
family were gone to bed, it was my custom to strip, and
cover myself with my clothes: it happened one morning
early, that my master sent for me by the sorrel nag, who
was his valet; when he came I was fast asleep, my clothes
fallen off on one side, and my shirt above my waist. I
awaked at the noise he made, and observed him to deliver
his message
30me disorder; after which he went to my
master, and in a great fright gave him a very confused
account of what he had seen: this I presently discovered;
for, going as soon as I was dressed to pay my attendance
upon his honor, he asked me "the meaning of what his ser-
vant had reported, that I was not the same thing when I
slept, as I appeared to be at other times; that his valet
assured him some part of me was white, some yellow, at least
not so white, and some brown."
I had hitherto concealed the secret of my dress, in order
to distinguish myself as much as possible from that cursed
race of Yahoos; but now I found it in vain to do so any
longer. Besides, I considered that my clothes and shoes
would soon wear out, which already were in a declining con-
dition, and must be supplied with some contrivance from the
hides of Yahoos, or other brutes; whereby the whole secret
would be known. I therefore told my master, “that in the
country whence I came, those of my kind always covered
their bodies with the hairs of certain animals prepared by art,
as well for decency as to avoid the inclemencies of air, both
hot and cold; of which, as to my own person, I would give
him immediate conviction, if he pleased to command me:
only desiring his excuse, if I did not expose those parts that
nature taught us to conceal." He said, "my discourse was
all very strange, but especially the last part; for he could not
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
281
understand, why nature should teach us to conceal what
nature had given; that neither himself nor family were
ashamed of any part of their bodies; but, however, I might
do as I pleased." Whereupon I first unbuttoned my coat,
and pulled it off. I did the same with my waistcoat. I drew
off my shoes, stockings, and breeches. I let my shirt down
to my waist, and drew up the bottom, fastening it like a
girdle about my middle to hide my nakedness.
My master observed the whole performance with great
signs of curiosity and admiration. He took up all my clothes
in his pastern, one piece after another, and examined them
diligently; he then stroked my body very gently, and looked
round me several times; after which, he said, it was plain I
must be a perfect Yahoo; but that I differed very much
from the rest of my species, in the softness, whiteness, and
smoothness of my skin; my want of hair on several parts of
my body; the shape and shortness of my claws behind and
before; and my affectation of walking continually on my
two hinder feet. He desired to see no more; and gave me
leave to put on my clothes again, for I was shuddering with
cold.
I expressed my uneasiness at his giving me so often the
appellation of Yahoo, an odious animal, for which I had so
utter a hatred and contempt: I begged he would forbear
applying that word to me, and make the same order in his
family and among his friends whom he suffered to see me. I
requested likewise, "that the secret of my having a false
covering to my body might be known to none but himself,
at least as long as my present clothing should last; for, as to
what the sorrel nag, his valet, had observed, his honor might
command him to conceal it.
All this my master very graciously consented to, and thus
the secret was kept till my clothes began to wear out, which
I was forced to supply by several contrivances that shall
hereafter be mentioned. In the meantime, he desired “I
would go on with my utmost diligence to learn their lan-
guage, because he was more astonished at my capacity for
speech and reason, than at the figure of my body, whether it
was covered or not," adding, "that he waited with some im-
patience to hear the wonders which I promised to tell him."
Thenceforward he doubled the pains he had been at to
instruct me: he brought me into all company, and made
them treat me with civility; "because," as he told them pri-
vately, "this would put me into good humor, and make me
more diverting."
282
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
Every day, when I waited on him, besides the trouble he
was at in teaching, he would ask me several questions con-
cerning myself, which I answered as well as I could; and by
these means he had already received some general ideas,
though very imperfect. It would be tedious to relate the
several steps by which I advanced to a more regular con-
versation: but the first account I gave of myself in any order
and length was to this purpose.
L
"That I came from a very far country, as I already had
attempted to tell him, with about fifty more of my own
species; that we travelled upon the seas in a great hollow
vessel made of wood, and larger than his honor's house. I
described the ship to him in the best terms I could, and ex-
plained, by the help of my handkerchief displayed, how it
was driven forward by the wind. That upon a quarrel
among us, I was set on shore on this coast, where I walked
forward, without knowing whither, till he delivered me from
the persecution of those execrable Yahoos."
He asked me,
"who made the ship, and how it was possible that the Houy-
hnhnms of my country would leave it to the management of
brutes." My answer was, "that T urst proceed no farther
in my relation, unless he would gi me his word and honor
that he would not be offended, and then I would tell him the
wonders I had so often promised." He agreed; and I went
on by assuring him, "that the ship was made by creatures,
like myself; who, in all the countries I had travelled, as well.
as in my own, were the only governing rational animals;
and that upon my arrival hith.,* I was as much astonished
to see the Houyhnhnms act like rational beings, as he, or hist
friends, could be, in finding some mark of reason in a
creature he was pleased to call a l'hoo; to which I owned
my resemblance in every part, t could not account for
their degenerate and brutal nature. I said farther, " that if
good fortune ever restored me to my native country, to relate
my travels hither, as I resolved to do, everybody would believe,
that I said the thing that was not, that I invented the story
out of my own head; and-with all possible respect to him-
self, his family, and friends, and under his promise of not
being offended-our countrymen would hardly think it
probable that a Houyhnhnm should be the presiding creature
of a nation, and a Yahoo the brute.”
J
It should be "upon my arrival here," not "arrival hither,” which is not En
glish-Sheridan.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
283
CD-10
CHAPTER IV.
THE HOUYHNHNM'S NOTION OF TRUTH AND FALSEHOOD—
THE AUTHOR'S DISCOUrse disappROVED BY HIS MASTER
THE AUTHOR GIVES MORE PARTICULAR ACCOUNT
OF HIMSELF, AND THE ACCIDENTS OF HIS VOYAGE.
My master heard me with great appearances of uneasi-
ness in his countenance; because doubting, or not believing,
are so little known in this country, that the inhabitants can-
not tell how to behave themselves under such circumstances;
and I remember, in frequent discourses with my master con-
cerning the nature of manhood in other parts of the world,
having occasion to talk of lying and false representation, it
was with much difficulty that he comprehended what I
meant, although he had otherwise a most acute judgment;
for he argued thus: "that the use of speech was to make us
understand one another, and to receive information of facts;
now, if any one said the thing which was not, these ends
were defeated, because I cannot properly be said to under-
stand him; and I am so far from receiving information, that
he leaves me worse than in ignorance; for I am led to be-
lieve a thing black, when it is white, and short when it is
long." And these were all the notions he had concerning
that faculty of lying, so perfectly well understood, and so
universally practiced, among human creatures.
To return from this digression. When I asserted that
the Yahoos were the only governing animals in my country,
which my master said was altogether past his conception, he
desired to know, "whether we had Houyhnhnms among us,
and what was their employment?" I told him, “we had
great numbers; that in summer they grazed in the field, and in
winter were kept in houses with hay and oats, where Yahoo
servants were employed to rub their skins smooth, comb
their manes, pick their feet, serve them with food, and make
their beds." "I understand you well," said my master; "it
is very plain, from all you have spoken, that whatever share
of reason the Yahoos pretend to, the Houyhnhnms are your
masters; I heartily wish our Yahoos would be so tractable."
I begged "his honor would please excuse me from proceed-
ing any further because I was verv certain that the account
284
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
he expected from me would he highly displeasing." But he
insisted in commanding* me to let him know the best and
the worst. I told him "he should be obeyed." I owned
"that the Houyhnhnms among us, whom we called horses,
were the most generous and comely animals we had; that
they excelled in strength and swiftness; and when they
belonged to persons of quality, were employed in travelling,
racing, or drawing chariots; they were treated with much
kindness and care, till they fell into diseases, or became
foundered in the feet; but then they were sold, and used to
all kinds of drudgery till they died; after which their skins
were stripped, and sold for what they were worth, and their
bodies left to be devoured by dogs and birds of prey. But
the common race of horses had not so good fortune, being
kept by farmers and carriers, and other mean people, who
put them to greater labor, and fed them worse.
I described as well as I could, our way of riding; the
shape and use of a bridle, a saddle, a spur, and a whip; of
harness and wheels. I added, "that we fastened plates of a
certain hard substance, called iron, at the bottom of their feet,
to preserve their hoofs from being broken by the stony ways
on which we often travelled."
My master, after some expressions of great indignation,
wondered "how we dared to venture upon a Houyhnhnm's
back; for he was sure, that the weakest servant in his house
would be able to shake off the strongest Yahoo; or by lying
down, or rolling on his back, squeeze the brute to death." I
answered, "that our horses were trained up, from three or
four years old, to the several uses we intended them for;
that if any of them proved intolerably vicious, they were
employed for carriages; that they were severely beaten,
while they were young, for any mischievous tricks: that the
males, designed for the common use of riding or draught,
were generally castrated about two years after their birth, to
take down their spirits, and make them more tame and gen-
tle; that they were indeed sensible of rewards and punish-
ments; but his honor would please to consider, that they had
not the least tincture of reason, any more than the Yahoos in
this country."
It put me to the pains of many circumlocutions, to give.
my master a right idea of what I spoke; for their language
does not abound in a variety of words, because their wants
and passions are fewer than among us.
But it is impossible
to express his noble resentment at our savage treatment of
"Insisted in_commanding," is not English; it should be, "persisted in com-
manding," etc.-Sheridan.
WHEN W
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
*285
the Houyhnhnm race; particularly after I had explained the
manner and use of castrating horses among us, to hinder
them from propagating their kind, and to render them more
servile. He said, "if it were possible there could be any
country where Yahoos alone were endued with reason, they
certainly must be the governing animal; because reason in
time will always prevail against brutal strength. But, con-
sidering the frames of our bodies, and especially of mine, he
thought no creature of equal bulk was so ill contrived for
employing that reason in the common offices of life;" where-
upon he desired to know "whether those among whom I
lived resembled me or the Yahoos of this country." I
assured him, "that I was as well shaped as most of my age;
but the younger, and the females, were much more soft and
tender, and the skins of the latter generally as white as
milk." He said, "I differed indeed from other Yahoos, being
much more cleanly, and not altogether so deformed; but, in-
point of real advantage, he thought I differed for the worse:
that my nails were of no use either to my fore or hinder
feet; as to my forefeet, he could not properly call them by
that, name, for he never observed me to walk upon them;
that they were too soft to bear the ground; that I generally
went with them uncovered; neither was the covering I
sometimes wore on them of the same shape, or so strong as
that on my feet behind; that I could not walk with security,
for if either of my hinder feet slipped, I must inevitably fall."
He then began to find fault with other parts of my body:
the flatness of my face, the prominence of my nose, mine
eyes placed directly in front, so that I could not look on
either side, without turning my head; that I was not able to
feed myself, without lifting one of my forefeet to my mouth;
and therefore nature had placed those joints to answer that
necessity. He knew not what could be the use of those
several clefts and divisions in my feet behind; that these
were too soft to bear the hardness and sharpness of stones
without a covering made from the skin of some other brute:
that my whole body wanted a fence against heat and cold,
which I was forced to put on and off every day, with tedious-
ness and trouble; and lastly, that he observed every animal
in this country naturally to abhor the Yahoos, whom the
weaker avoided, and the stronger drove from them. So that,
supposing us to have the gift of reason, he could not see how
it were poss.ole to cure that natural antipathy which every
creature discovered against us; nor consequently, how we
could tame and render them serviceable. However, "he
would," as he said, "debate the matter no farther, because
286
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
he was more desirous to know my own story, the country
where I was born, and the several actions and events of my
life before I came hither."
I assured him "how extrerely desirous I was that he
should be satisfied on every point; but I doubted much,
whether it would be possible for me to explain myself on
several subjects, whereof his honor could have no concep-
tion; because I saw nothing in his country to which I could
resemble them: that, however, I would do my best, and
strive to express myself by similitudes, humbly desiring- his
assistance when I wanted proper words;" which he was
pleased to promise me.
""
I said, "my birth was of honest parents, in an island
called England, which was remote from his country, as many
days' journey as the strongest of his honor's servants could
travel in the annual course of the sun; that I was bred a
surgeon, whose trade it is to cure wounds and hurts in the
body, gotten by accident or violence; that my country was
governed by a female man, whom we call queen, that I left
it to get riches, whereby I might maintain my wife and
family when I should return; that, in my last voyage, I was
commander of the ship, and had about fifty Yahoos under
me, many of which died at sea, and I was forced to supply
them by others picked out from several nations; that our
ship was twice in danger of being sunk, the first time by a
great storm, and the second by striking against a rock.'
Here my master interposed, by asking me, "how I could
persuade strangers, out of different conntries, to venture with
me, after the losses I had sustained, and the hazards I had
run?" I said, "they were persons of desperate fortunes,
forced to fly from the places of their birth on account of their
poverty or their crimes. Some were undone by lawsuits;
others spent all they had in drinking, whoring, and gaming;
others fled for treason; many for murder, theft, poisoning,
robbery, perjury, forgery, coining false money; for commit-
ting rapes or sodomy; for flying from their colors, or desert-
ing to the enemy; and most of them had broken prison:
none of these durst return to their native countries, for fear of
being hanged, or of starving in a jail; and therefore they were
under the necessity of seeking a livelihood in other places."
During this discourse my master was pleased to interrupt
me several times. I had made use of many circumlocutions
in describing to him the nature of the several crimes for which
most of our crew had been forced to fly their country. This
labor took up several days' conversation before he was able
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
287
to comprehend me. He was wholly at a loss to know what
could be the use or necessity of practising these vices; to clear
up which, I endeavored to give some ideas of the desire of
power and riches; of the terrible effects of lust, intemperance,
malice, and envy. All this I was forced to define and describe
by putting cases and making suppositions. After which, like
one whose imagination was struck with something never seen
or heard of before, he would lift up his eyes with amaze-
ment and indignation. Power, government, war, law, punish-
ment, and a thousand other things, had no terms, wherein
that language could express them; which made the difficulty
almost insuperable, to give my master any conception of what
I meant. But, being of an excellent understanding, much
improved by contemplation and converse, he at last arrived
at a competent knowledge of what human nature, in our
parts of the world, is capable to perform; and desired I
would give him some particular account of that land which
we call Europe, but especially of my own country
CHAPTER V.
THE AUTHOR, AT HIS MASTER'S COMMAND, INFORMS HIM
OF THE STATE OF ENGLAND-THE CAUSES OF WAR
AMONG THE PRINCES OF EUROPE-THE AUTHOR BEGINS
TO EXPLAIN THE ENGLISH CONSTITUTION.
LET the reader please to observe that the following extract
of many conversations I had with my master, contains a sum-
mary of the most material points, which were discoursed at
several times for above two years; his honor often desiring
fuller satisfaction, as I farther improved in the Houyhnhnm
tongue. I laid before him, as well as I could, the whole state
of Europe; I discoursed of trade and manufactures, of arts and
sciences; and the answers I gave to all the questions he
made, as they arose upon several subjects, were a fund of
conversation not to be exhausted. But I shall here only set
down the substance of what passed between us concerning
my own country, reducing it in order as well as I can, without
any regard to time or other circumstances, while I strictly
adhere to truth. My only concern is, that I shall hardly be
able to do justice to my master's arguments and expressions,
which must needs suffer by my want of capacity, as well as
by a translation into our barbarous English.
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GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
In obedience, therefore, to his honor's commands, I re-
lated to him the revolution under the Prince of Orange: the
long war with France, entered into by the said prince, and
renewed by his successor, the present queen; wherein the
greatest powers of Christendom were engaged, and which
still continued. I computed, at his request, "that about a
million of Yahoos might have been killed in the whole
progress of it; and perhaps a hundred or more cities taken,
and five times as many ships burnt or sunk.”
He asked me, "what were the usual causes or motives that
made one country go to war with another?" I answered,
"they were innumerable; but I should only mention a few.
of the chief. Sometimes the ambition of princes, who never
think they have land or people enough to govern; sometimes
the corruption of ministers, who engage their master in a
war, in order to stifle or divert the clamor of the subjects
against their evil administration. Difference in opinions has
cost many millions of lives: for instance, whether flesh be
bread, or bread be flesh; whether the juice of a certain berry
be blood or wine; * whether whistling be a vice or a virtue;t
whether it be better to kiss a post or throw it into the fire;†
what is the best color for a coat, § whether black, white, red,
or gray; and whether it should be long or short, narrow or
wide, dirty or clean, with many more. Neither are any wars
so furious and bloody, or of so long continuance, as those
occasioned by difference in opinion, especially if it be in
things indifferent.
"Sometimes the quarrel between two princes is to
decide which of them shall dispossess a third of his
dominions, where neither of them pretend to any right:
sometimes one prince quarrels with another, for fear the
other should quarrel with him; sometimes a war is entered
upon, because the enemy is too strong; and sometimes be-
cause he is too weak: sometimes our neighbors want the
things which we have, or have the, things which we want,
and we both fight, till they take ours, or give us theirs. It
is a very justifiable cause of a war, to invade a country after
the people have been wasted by famine, destroyed by pesti-
lence, or embroiled by factions among themselves. It is
justifiable to enter into war against our nearest ally, when
one of his towns lies convenient for us, or a territory of
land, that would render our dominions round and compact. If
a prince sends forces into a nation, where the people are poor
*Transubstantiation.-Hawkesworth, †Church music.-Id. t Kissing a cross.-Id.
The color and make of sacred vestments, an forentarders of ecclesiastics.—za
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
289
and ignorant, he may lawfully put half of them to death, and
make slaves of the rest, in order to civilize and reduce them from
their barbarous way of living. It is a very kingly, honorable,
and frequent practice, when one prince desires the assistance
of another, to secure him against an invasion, that the assistant,
when he has driven out the invader, should seize on the domin-
ions himself, and kill, imprison, or banish the prince he came
to relieve. Alliance by blood, or marriage, is a frequent cause
of war between princes; and the nearer the kindred is, the
greater their disposition to quarrel: poor nations are hungry,
and rich nations are proud; and pride and hunger will ever be
at variance. For these reasons, the trade of a soldier is held
the most honorable of all others, because a soldier is a Yahoo
hired to kill, in cold blood, as many of his own species, who
have never offended him, as possibly he can.
"There is likewise a kind of beggarly princes in Europe,
not able to make war by themselves, who hire out their troops
to richer nations, for so much a day to each man; of which
they keep three-fourths to themselves, and it is the best part
of their maintenance; such are those in many northern parts
of Europe.”*
(6 What you have told me," said my master, "upon the sub-
ject of war, does indeed discover most admirably the effects of
that reason you pretend to: however, it is happy that the shame
is greater than the danger; and that nature has left you utterly
incapable of doing much mischief. For, your months lying flat
with your faces, you can hardly bite each other to any purpose,
unless by consent. Then as to the claws upon your feet before
and behind, they are so short and tender, that one of our Ya-
hoos would drive a dozen of yours before him. And therefore,
in recounting the numbers of those who have been killed
in battle, I cannot but think you have said the thing which is
not."
I could not forbear shaking my head and smiling a little at
his ignorance. And being no stranger to the art of war, I gave
him a description of cannons, culverins, muskets, carabines,
pistols, bullets, powder, swords, bayonets, battles, sieges, re-
treats, attacks, undermines, countermines, bombardments, sea-
fights, ships sunk with a thousand men, twenty thousand killed
on each side, dying groans, limbs flying in the air, smoke, noise,
confusion, trampling to death under horses' feet, flight, pur-
suit, victory; fields strewed with carcasses, left for food to
Swift alludes to the German mercenaries hired by George I.: the employment of thesa
foreigners gave great offence to the English tion.
290
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
dogs, and wolves, and birds of prey; plundering, stripping,
ravishing, burning, and destroying. And, to set forth the valor
of my own dear countrymen, I assured him, "that I had seen
them blow up a hundred enemies at once in a siege, and as
many in a ship; and beheld the dead bodies drop down in
pieces from the clouds, to the great diversion of the specta-
tors."*
}
I was going on to more particulars, when my master com-
manded me silence. He said, “whoever understood the na-
ture of Yahoos might easily believe it impossible for so vile an
animal to be capable of every action I had named, if their
strength and cunning equalled their malice. But as my dis-
course had increased his abhorrence of the whole species, so
he found it gave him a disturbance in his mind, to which he
was wholly a stranger before. He thought his ears, being used
to such abominable words, might, by degrees, admit them with
léss detestation: that although he hated the Yahoos of this
country, yet he no more blamed them for their odious qualities
than he did gnnayh (a bird of prey) for its cruelty, or a sharp
stone for cutting his hoof. But when a creature pretending to
reason could be capable of such enormities, he dreaded lest the
corruption of that faculty might be worse than brutality itself,
He seemed therefore confident, that, instead of reason, we
were only possessed of some quality, fitted to increase our
natural vices; as the reflection from a troubled stream returns
the image of an ill-shapen body, not only larger, but more dis-
torted."
}
He added, "that he had heard too much upon the subject
of war, both in this and some former discourses. There was
another point which a little perplexed him at present. I had
informed him that some of our crew left their country on ac-
count of being ruined by law; that I had already explained the
meaning of the word; but he was at a loss how it should come
to pass, that the law, which was intended for every man's pres-
* It would perhaps be impossible, by the most labored argument, or forcible eloquence,
to show the absurd injustice and horrid cruelty of war so effectually, as by this simple ex-
hibition of them in a new light; with war, including every species of iniquity, and every
art of destruction, we become familiar, by degrees, under specious terms, which are seldom
examired, because they are learned at an age in which the mind implicitly receives and re
tains whatever is impressed: thus it happens, that when one man murders another to gratify
his lust, we shudder; but when one man murders a million to gratify his vanity, we approve
and we admire, we envy and we applaud. If, when this and the preceding pages are read,
we discover with astonishment that when the same events have occurred in history, we felt
no emotion, and acquiesced in wars which we could not but know to have been commenced
for such causes and carried on by such means; let not him be censured for too much de
basing his species, who has contributed to their felicity and preservation, by stripping off
the veil of custom and prejudice, and holding up in their native deformity the vices by which
they become wretched, and the arts by which they are destroyed.-Hawkesworth.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
29t
ervation, should be any man's ruin. Therefore he desired to
be farther satisfied what I meant by law, and the dispensers
thereof, according to the present practice in my own country;
because he thought nature and reason were sufficient guides for
a reasonable animal, as we pretended to be, in showing us
what we ought to do, and what to avoid.”
I assured his honor, "that law was a science, in which I
had not much conversed, farther than by employing advocates
in vain, upon some injustices that had been done me: how-
ever, I would give him all the satisfaction I was able.”
I said, "there was a society of men among us, bred up
from their youth in the art of proving, by words multiplied for
the purpose, that white is black, and black is white, according
as they are paid. To this society all the rest of the people are
slaves. For example, if my neighbor has a mind to my cow,
he hires a lawyer to prove that he ought to have my cow from
me. I must then hire another to defend my right, it being
against all rules of law that any man should be allowed to
speak for himself. Now, in this case, I, who am the right
owner, lie under too great disadvantages, my lawyer being prac-
ticed almost from his cradle in defending falsehood, is quite out
of his element when he would be an advocate for justice, which
is an unnatural office he always attempts with great awkward-
ness, if not with ill-will. The second disadvantage is, that my
lawyer must proceed with great caution, or else he will be
reprimanded by the judges, and abhorred by his brethren, as
one that would lessen the practice of the law. And therefore
I have but two methods to preserve my cow.
The first is, to
gain over my adversary's lawyer with a double fee, who will
then betray his client by insinuating that he has justice on his
side. The second way is for my lawyer to make my cause ap-
pear as unjust as he can, by allowing the cow to belong to my
adversary; and this, if it be skilfully done, will certainly be-
speak the favor of the bench.* Now your honor is to know
that these judges are persons appointed to decide all contro-
versies of property, as well as for the trial of criminals, and
picked out from the most dexterous lawyers, who are grown old
or lazy; and having been biassed all their lives against truth
and equity, lie under such a fatal necessity of favoring fraud,
perjury, and oppression, that I have known some of them refuse
a large bribe from the side where justice lay, rather than injure
This bitter tirade against lawyers was occasioned by the zeal with which the great ma
jority of the English bar supported the principles of the revolution and the Hanoverian
auccession.
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GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
·
the faculty, by doing anything unbecoming their nature or their
office.*
"It is a maxim among these lawyers, that whatever has
been done before may legally be done again; and therefore
they take especial care to record all the decisions formerly
made against common justice, and the general reason of man-
kind. These, under the name of precedents, they produce as
authorities to justify the most iniquitous opinions; and the
judges never fail of directing accordingly.
"In pleading, they studiously avoided entering into the
merits of the cause; but are loud, violent, and tedious in
dwelling upon all circumstances which are not to the purpose.
For instance, in the case already mentioned; they never desire
to know what claim or title my adversary has to my cow: but
whether the said cow was red or black; her horns long or
short; whether the field I graze her in be round or square ;
whether she was milked at home or abroad; what diseases she
is subject to, and the like; after which they consult precedents,
adjourn the cause from time to time, and in ten, twenty or
thirty years come to an issue.
"It is likewise to be observed, that this society has a pe-
culiar cant and jargon of their own, that no other mortal can
understand, and wherein all their laws are written, which they
take special care to multiply; whereby they have wholly con-
founded the very essence of truth and falsehood, of right and
wrong; so that it will take thirty years to decide, whether the
field, left me by my ancestors for six generations, belongs to
me, or to a stranger three hundred miles off.
"In the trial of persons accused for crimes against the
state, the method is much more short and commendable: the
judge first sends to sound the disposition of those in power,
after which he can easily hang or save a criminal, strictly pre-
serving all due forms of law."
Here my master interposing, said, "it was a pity that crea-
tures endowed with such prodigious abilities of mind as these
lawyers, by the description I gave of them, must certainly be,
were not rather encouraged to be instructors of others in wis-
dom and knowledge." In answer to which, I assured his
honor, "that in all points out of their own trade, they were
usually the most ignorant and stupid generation among us, the
most despicable in common conversation, avowed enemies to
* It is probable that the conduct of the Irish judges on the trial of Swift's printers for
libel prompted the severe attack which is here made upon the bench.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
293
all knowledge and learning, and equally disposed to pervert
the general reason of mankind, in every other subject of dis
course as in that of their own profession.'
""
CHAPTER VI.
▲ CONTINUATION OF THE STATE OF ENGLAND UNDER QUEEN
ANNE-THE CHARACTER OF A FIRST MINISTER OF STATE
IN EUROPEAN COURTS.
My master was yet wholly at a loss to understand what
motives could incite this race of lawyers to perplex, disquiet,
and weary themselves, and engage in a confederacy of injus-
tice, merely for the sake of injuring their fellow-animals;
neither could he comprehend what I meant in saying, they did
it for hire. Whereupon I was at much pains to describe to him
the use of money, the materials it was made of, and the value
of the metals; "that when a Yahoo had got a great store of
this precious substance, he was able to purchase whatever he
had a mind to; the finest clothing, the noblest houses, great
tracts of land, the most costly meats and drinks, and have his
choice of the most beautiful females. Therefore, since money
alone was able to perform all these feats, our Yahoos thought
they could never have enough of it to spend, or to save, as
they found themselves inclined, from their natural bent, either
to profusion or avarice. That the rich man enjoyed the fruit
of the poor man's labor, and the latter were a thousand to one
in proportion to the former. That the bulk of our people
were forced to live miserably, by laboring every day for small
wages, to make a few live plentifully."
I enlarged myself much on these, and many other particu-
lars to the same purpose; but his honor was still to seek; for
he went upon a supposition, that all animals had a title to
their share in the productions of the earth, and especially those
who resided over the rest. Therefore he desired I would let
him know," what these costly meats were, and how any of us
happened to want them?" Whereupon I enumerated as many
sorts as came into my head, with the various methods of dress-
ing them, which could not be done without sending vessels by
sea to every part of the world, as well for liquors to drink as
for sauces and innumerable er conveniences. I assured ...
L
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GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
"that this whole globe of earth must be at least three times
gone round, before one of our better female Yahoos could get
her breakfast, or a cup to put it in." He said, "that must
needs be a miserable country, which cannot furnish food for
its own inhabitants. But what he chiefly wondered at was,
how such vast tracts of ground as I described should be wholly
without fresh water, and the people put to the necessity of
sending over the sea for drink." I replied, "that England
(the dear place of my nativity) was computed to produce three
times the quantity of food more than its inhabitants are able to
consume, as well as liquors extracted from grain, or pressed
out of the fruit of certain trees, which made excellent drink ;
and the same proportion in every other convenience of life.
But, in order to feed the luxury and intemperance of the males,
and the vanity of the females, we sent away the greatest part
of our necessary things to other countries, whence in return
we brought the materials of diseases, folly and vice, to spend
among ourselves. Hence it follows of necessity, that vast
numbers of our people are compelled to seek their livelihood
by begging, robbing, stealing, cheating, pimping, flattering,
suborning, forswearing, forging, gaming, lying, fawning, hector-
ing, voting, scribbling, star-gazing, poisoning, whoring, canting,
libelling, free-thinking, and the like occupations:" every one
of which terms I was at much pains to make him understand.*
"That wine was not imported among us from foreign coun-
tries, to supply the want of water or other drinks, but because
it was a sort of liquid which made us merry by putting us out
of our senses, diverted all melancholy thoughts, begat wild
extravagant imaginations in the brain, raised our hopes and
banished our fears, suspended every office of reason for a time,
and deprived us of the use of our limbs, till we fell into a pro-
found sleep; although it must be confessed that we always
awaked sick and dispirited, and that the use of this liquor
filled us with diseases which made our lives uncomfortable and
short.
"But beside all this, the bulk of our people supported
themselves by furnishing the necessities or conveniences of life
to the rich and to each other. For instance, when I am at
home, and dressed as I ought to be, I carry on my body the
workmanship of a hundred tradesmen; the building and furni-
ture of my house employ as many more, and five times the
number to adorn my wife."
* Dr. Young relates that Lord Bolingbroke offered to send his bill of fare when trying
to persuade Swift to dine with him--" Send me your bill of company," was Swift's reply.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
295
I was going on to tell him of another sort of people, who get
their livelihood by attending the sick, having upon some occa-
sions informed his honor, that many of my crew had died of
diseases. But here it was with the utmost difficulty that I
brought him to apprehend what I meant. "He could easily
conceive, that a Houyhnhnm grew weak and heavy a few days
before his death, or by some accident might hurt a limb; but
that nature, who works all things to perfection, should suffer
any pains to breed in our bodies he thought impossible, and
desired to know the reason of so unaccountable an evil."
I told him "we fed on a thousand things which operated
contrary to each other; that we ate when we were not hungry,
and drank without the provocation of thirst; that we sat
whole nights drinking strong liquors, without eating a bit, which
disposed us to sloth, inflamed our bodies, and precipitated or
prevented digestion. That prostitute female Yahoos acquired
a certain malady, which bred rottenness in the bones of those
who fell into their embraces: that this, and many other dis-
eases, were propagated from father to son, so that great num-
bers come into the world with complicated maladies upon them;
that it would be endless to give him a catalogue of all diseases
incident to human bodies, for they would not be fewer than
five or six hundred, spread over every limb and joint-in short
every part, external and intestine, having diseases appropriated
to itself. To remedy which, there was a sort of people bred
up among us in the profession, or pretence, of curing the sick.
And because I had some skill in the faculty, I would, in grati-
tude to his honor, let him know the whole mystery and method
by which they proceed.
"Their fundamental is, that all diseases arise from reple-
tion; whence they conclude, that a great evacuation of the
body is necessary, either through the natural passage, or up-
wards at the mouth. Their next business is, from herbs,
minerals, gums, oils, shells, salts, juices, seaweed, excrements,
barks of trees, serpents, toads, frogs, spiders, dead men's flesh
and bones, birds, beasts, and fishes, to form a composition,
for smell and taste, the most abominable, nauseous, and detes-
table they can possibly contrive, which the stomach immedi
ately rejects with loathing, and this they call a vomit; or else,
from the same storehouse, with some other poisonous additions,
they command us to take in at the orifice above or below (just
as the physician then happens to be disposed), a medicine
equally annoying and disgustful to the bowels: which, relaxing
the belly, drives down all before it; and this they call a purge,
鼎
​296
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
or a clyster. For nature (as the physicians allege) having in-
tended the superior anterior orifice only for the intromission
of solids and liquids, and the inferior posterior for ejection,
these artists* ingeniously considering, that in all diseases
nature is forced out of her seat, therefore, to replace her in it,
the body must be treated in a manner directly contrary, by in-
terchanging the use of each orifice; forcing solids and liquids
in at the anus, and making evacuations at the mouth.
"But besides real diseases, we are subject to many that are
only imaginary, for which the physicians have invented imagin-
ary cures these have their several names, and so have the
drugs that are proper for them; and with these our female
Yahoos are always infested.
"One great excellency in this tribe, is their skill at prog-
nostics, wherein they seldom fail; their predictions in real dis-
eases, when they arise in any degree of malignity, generally
portending death, which is always in their power, when recovery
is not; and therefore, upon any unexpected signs of amend-
ment, after they have pronounced their sentence, rather than
be accused as false prophets, they know how to prove their
sagacity to the world by a seasonable dose.
(C
They are likewise of special use to husbands and wives
who are grown weary of their mates; to eldest sons, to great
ministers of state, and often to princes."
I had formerly, upon occasions, discoursed with my master
upon the nature of government in general, and particularly of
our own excellent constitution, deservedly the wonder and envy
of the whole world. But having here accidentally mentioned
a minister of state, he commanded me some time after to in-
form him what species of Yahoo I particularly meant by that
appellation.
I told him "that a first or chief minister of state, who was
the person I intended to describe, was a creature wholly ex-
empt from joy and grief, love and hatred, pity and anger; at
least, makes use of no other passions, but a violent desire of
wealth, power, and titles; that he applies his words to all uses
except to the indication of his mind; that he never tells a
truth but with an intent that you should take it for a lie; nor a
lie, but with a design that you should take it for a truth; that
those he speaks worst of behind their backs are in the surest
way of preferment; and whenever he begins to praise you to
others, or to yourself, you are from that day forlorn. The worst.
These artists," is a nominative without any verb, to which it refers in the remainder
* the sentence.--Sherid
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
297
mark you can receive is a promise, especially when it is con-
firmed with an oath; after which, every wise man retires, and
gives over all hopes.
"There are three methods by which a man may rise to be
chief minister. The first is, by knowing how, with prudence,
to dispose of a wife, a daughter, or a sister; the second, by
betraying or undermining his predecessor; and the third is, by
a furious zeal, in public assemblies, against the corruptions of
the court. But a wise prince would rather choose to employ
those who practice the last of these methods; because such
zealots prove always the most obsequious and subservient to
the will and passions of their master. That these ministers,
having all employments at their disposal, preserve themselves.
in power, by bribing the majority of a senate or great council;
and at last, by an expedient, called an act of indemnity (where-
of I described the nature to him), they secure themselves from
after reckonings, and retire from the public laden with the
spoils of the nation.
"The palace of a chief minister is a seminary to breed up
others in his own trade; the pages, lackeys, and porter, by
imitating their master, become ministers of state in their several
districts, and learn to excel in the three principal ingredients,
of insolence, lying, and bribery. Accordingly, they have a
subaltern court paid to them by persons of the best rank; and
sometimes, by the force of dexterity and impudence, arrive,
through several gradations, to be successors to their lord.
"He is usually governed by a decayed wench, or favorite
footman, who are the tunnels through which all graces are
conveyed, and may properly be called in the last resort, the
governors of the kingdom.
>>
One day in discourse, my master, having heard me mention
the nobility of my country, was pleased to make me a compli-
ment which I could not pretend to deserve; "that he was sure
I must have been born of some noble family, because I far
exceeded in shape, color, and cleanliness, all the Yahoos of his
nation, although I seemed to fail in strength and agility, which
must be imputed to my different way of living from those other
brutes; and besides, I was not only endowed with the faculty
of speech, but likewise with some rudiments of reason, to a
degree that with all his acquaintance I passed for a prodigy.”
He made me observe, "that among the Houyhnhnms, the
white, the sorrel, and the iron-gray, were not so exactly shaped
as the bay, the dapple-gray, and the black; nor born with equal
talents of mind, or a capacity to improve them; and therefore
298
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
continued always in the condition of servants, without ever as
piring to match out of their own race, which in that country
would be reckoned monstrous and unnatural.”
I made his honor my most humble acknowledgments for the
good opinion he was pleased to conceive of me: but assured
him, at the same time, that my birth was of the lower sort, hav-
ing been born of plain, honest parents, who were just able to
give me a tolerable education: that nobility, among us, was
altogether a different thing from the idea he had of it: that our
young noblemen are bred from their childhood in idleness and
luxury; that, as soon as years will permit, they consume their
vigor, and contract odious diseases among lewd females; and
when their fortunes are almost ruined, they marry some woman
of mean birth, disagreeable person, and unsound constitution
(merely for the sake of money), whom they hate and despise.
That the productions of such marriages are generally scrofulous,
rickety, or deformed children: by which means the family sel
dom continues above three generations, unless the wife takes
care to provide a healthy father, among her neighbors or do-
mestics, in order to improve and continue the breeds: that a
weak diseased body, a meagre countenance, and a sallow com-
plexion, are the true marks of noble blood: and a healthy, ro-
bust appearance is so disgraceful in a man of quality, that the
world concludes his real father to have been a groom or a coach-
man. The imperfections of his mind run parallel with those
of his body, being a composition of spleen, dulness, ignorance,
caprice, sensuality, and pride.
"Without the consent of this illustrious body, no law can
be enacted, repealed, or altered; and these nobles have likewise
the decision of all our possessions, without appeal.” *
Dr. Young relates that Lord Bolingbroke's father said to him on his being made a lord
"Ah, Harry! I ever said you would be hanged, but now I find you will be beheaded."
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
299
CHAPTER VII.
THE AUTHOR'S GREAT LOVE OF HIS NATIVE COUNTRY-HIS
MASTER'S OBSERVATIONS UPON THE CONSTITUTION AND AD-
MINISTRATION OF ENGLAND, AS DESCRIBED BY THE AUTHOR,
WITH PARALLEL CASES AND COMPARISONS-HIS MASTER'S
OBSERVATIONS UPON HUMAN NATURE.
LET the reader not wonder how I could prevail on myself to
give so free a representation of my own species, among a race
of mortals who are already too apt to conceive the vilest opinion
of human kind, from that entire congruity between me and their
Yahoos. But I must freely confess, that the many virtues of
those excellent quadrupeds, placed in opposite view to human
corruptions, had so far opened my eyes and enlarged my under-
standing, that I began to view the actions and passions of man
in a very different light, and to think the honor of my own kind
not worth managing; which, besides, it was impossible for me
to do, before a person of so acute a judgment as my master, who
daily convinced me of a thousand faults in myself, whereof I
had not the least preception before, and which, with us, would
never be numbered even among human infirmities. I had like-
wise learned, from his example, an utter detestation of all false-
hood or disguise; and truth appeared so amiable to me, that I
determined upon sacrificing everything to it.
Let me deal so candidly with the reader as to confess that
there was yet a much stronger motive for the freedom I took in
my representation of things. I had not yet been a year in this
country before I contracted such a love and veneration for the
inhabitants, that I entered on a firm resolution never to return
to human kind, but to pass the rest of my life among these ad-
mirable Houyhnhnms, in the contemplation and practice of
every virtue; where I could have no example or incitement to
vice. But it was decreed by fortune, my perpetual enemy,
that so great a felicity should not fall to my share. However,
it is now some comfort to reflect, that in what I said of my
countrymen, I extenuated their faults as much as I durst before
so strict an examiner; and upon every article gave as favorable
a turn as the matter would bear. For, indeed, who is there
alive that will not be swayed by his bias and partiality to the
place of his birth?
300
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
I have related the substance of several conversations I had
with my master, during the greatest part of the time I had the
honor to be in his service; but have, indeed, for brevity sake,
omitted much more than is here set down.
When I had answered all his questions, and his curiosity
seemed to be fully satisfied, he sent for me one morning early,
and commanded me to sit down at some distance (an honor
which he had never before conferred upon me). He said, "he
had been very seriously considering my whole story, as far as it
related both to myself and to my country; that he looked upon
us as a sort of animals, to whose share, by what accident he
could not conjecture, some small pittance of reason had fallen,
whereof we made no other use than by its assistance to aggra-
vate our natural corruptions, and to acquire new ones, which
nature had not given us; that we disarmed ourselves of the few
abilities she had bestowed; had been very successful in multi-
plying our original wants, and seemed to spend our whole lives
in vain endeavors to supply them by our own inventions. That
as to myself, it was manifest I had neither the strength nor
the agility of a common Yahoo; that I walked infirmly on my
hinder feet; had found out a contrivance to make my claws of
no use or defence, and to remove the hair from my chin, which
was intended as a shelter from the sun and the weather. Lastly,
that I could neither run with speed, nor climb trees like my
brethren," as he called them, "the Yahoos in his country."
“That our institutions of government and law were plainly
owing to our gross defects in reason, and by consequence in
virtue; because reason alone is sufficient to govern a rational
creature ; which was therefore a character we had no pretence
to challenge, even from the account I had given of my own
people; although he manifestly perceived that, in order to favor
them, I had concealed many particulars, and often said the
thing which was not.
"He was the more confirmed in this opinion, because he
observed, that as I agreed in every feature of my body with
other Yahoos, except where it was to my real disadvantage in
point of strength, speed, and activity, the shortness of my claws,
and some particulars where nature had no part; so from the
representation I had given him of our lives, our manners, and
our actions, he found as near a resemblance in the disposition
of our minds." He said, "the Yahoos were known to hate one
another more than they did any different species of animals ;
and the reason usually assigned was, the odiousness of their own
shapes, which all could see in the rest, but not in themselves.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
JOI
He had therefore begun to think it not unwise in us to cover
our bodies, and by that invention conceal many of our deform-
ities from each other, which would else be hardly supportable.
But he now found he had been mistaken, and that the dissensions
of those brutes in his country were owing to the same cause
with ours, as I had described them. For if," said he, “you
throw among five Yahoos as much food as would be sufficient
for fifty, they will, instead of eating peaceably, fall together by
the ears, each single one impatient to have all to itself; and
therefore a servant was usually employed to stand by while they
were feeding abroad, and those kept at home were tied at a
distance from each other; that if a cow died of age or accident,
before a Houyhnhnm could secure it for his own Yahoos, those
in the neighborhood would come in herds to seize it, and then
would ensue such a battle as I had described, with terrible
wounds made by their claws on both sides, although they sel-
dom were able to kill one another for want of such convenient
instruments of death as we had invented. At other times, the
like battles have been fought between the Yahoos of several
neighborhoods, without any visible cause; those of one district
watching all opportunities to surprise the next before they are
prepared. But if they find their project has miscarried, they
return home, and, for want of enemies, engage in what I call a
civil war among themselves.
-Tim
"That in some fields of his country, there are certain shining
stones of several colors, whereof the Yahoos are violently fond;
and when part of these stones is fixed in the earth, as it some
times happens, they will dig with their claws for whole days to
get them out, then carry them away and hide them by heaps in
their kennels; but still looking round with great caution, for
fear their comrades should find out their treasure." My master
said, "he could never discover the reason of this unnatural ap-
petite, or how these stones could be of any use to a Yahoo; but
now he believed it might proceed from the same principle of
avarice which I had ascribed to mankind. That he had once,
by way of experiment, privately removed a heap of these stones
from the place where one of his Yahoos had buried it; where-
upon the sordid animal, missing his treasure, by his loud lament-
ing brought the whole herd to the place, there miserably howled,
and then fell to biting and tearing the rest; began to pine away;
would neither eat nor sleep, nor work, till he ordered a servant
privately to convey the stones into the same hole, and hide them
as before; which, when his Yahoo had found, he presently recov-
ered his spirits and good humor, but took good care to remove
go2
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
them to a better hiding-place, and has ever since been a very
serviceable brute."
My master further assured me, which I also observed my-
self, "that in the fields where the shining stones abord, the
fiercest and most frequent battles are fought, occa ned by
perpetual inroads of the neighboring Yahoos."
ered such
should be
$
He said, "it was common, when two Yahoos diso
a stone in a field, and were contending which of the,
the proprietor, a third would take the advantage nd carry it
away from them both;" which my master would needs contend to
have some kind of resemblance with our suits at law; wherein
I thought it for our credit not to undeceive him; since the
decision he mentioned was much more equitable than many
decrees among us; because the plaintiff and defendant there
lost nothing beside the stone they contended for: whereas
our courts of equity would never have dismissed the cause
while either of them had anything left.
My master, continuing his discourse, said, "there was noth-
ing that rendered the Yahoos more odious than their undistin-
guishing appetite to devour everything that came in their way,
whether herbs, roots, berries, the corrupted flesh of animals, or
all mingled together: and it was peculiar in their temper, that
they were fonder of what they could get by rapine or stealth at
a greater distance, than much better food provided for them at
home. If their prey held out, they would eat till they were
ready to burst; after which, nature had pointed out to them a
certain root that gave them a general evacuation.
"There was also another kind of root, very juicy, but some-
what rare and difficult to be found, which the Yahoos sought
for with much eagerness, and would suck it with great delight;
it produced in them the same effects that wine has upon us. It
would make them sometimes hug and sometimes tear one
another; they would howl, and grin, and chatter, and reel, and
tumble, and then fall asleep in the mud."
I did indeed observe that the Yahoos were the only animals
in the country subject to any diseases; which, however, were
much fewer than horses have among us, and contracted not by
any ill treatment they meet with, but by the nastiness and
greediness of that sordid brute. Neither has their language
any more an a general appellation for those maladies, which
is borrowe from the name of the beast, and called hnea yahoo,
or Yahoo'. evil; and the cure prescribed is a mixture of their
own dung and urine, forcibly put down the Yahoo's throat. This
I have since often known to have been taken with success, and
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
363
do here freely recommend it to my countrymen, for the public
good, as an admirable specific against all diseases produced by
repletion.
"As to learning, government, arts, manufactures, and the
like," my master confessed, "he could find little or no resem-
blance between the Yahoos of that country and those in ours.
For he only meant to observe what parity there was in our natures.
He had heard, indeed, some curious Houyhnhnms observe, that
in most herds there was a sort of ruling Yahoo (as among us
there is generally some leading or principle stag in a park), who
was always more deformed in body and mischievous in disposi-
tion than any of the rest. That this leader had usually a favorite
as like himself as he could get, whose employment was to lick
his master's feet and posteriors, and drive the female Yahoos to
his kennel;* for which he was now and then rewarded with a
piece of ass's flesh. This favorite is hated by the whole herd,
and therefore, to protect himself, keeps always near the person
of his leader. He usually continues in office till a worse can
be found; but the very moment he is discarded, his successor,
at the head of all the Yahoos in that district, young and old,
male and female, come in in a body,† and discharge their ex-
crements upon him from head to foot. But how far this might
be applicable to our courts, and favorites, and ministers of state,
my master said I could best determine."
66
I durst make no return to this malicious insinuation, which
debased human understanding below the sagacity of a common
hourd, who has judgment enough to distinguish and follow the
cry of the ablest dog in the pack, without being ever mistaken.
My master told me, there were some qualities remarkable
in the Yahoos, which he had not observed me to mention, or
at least very slightly, in the accounts I had given him of human-
kind." He said, "those animals, like other brutes, had their
females in common; but in this they differed, that the she
Yahoo would admit the males while she was pregnant; and that
the males would quarrel and fight with the females, as fiercely
as with each other; both which practices were such degrees
of infamous brutality, as no other sensitive creature ever ar-
rived at.
"Another thing he wondered at in the Yahoos, was their
strange disposition to nastiness and dirt; whereas there ap
* Flattery and pimping.-Hawkesworth.
931
#
This sentence is altogether ungrammatical: "his successor is the only nominative to
the plural verb “come; it may be thus amended,-"but the very moment he is discarded,
all the Yahoos in that district, young and old, male, and female, with his successor at their
head, come in a body,” etc.—Sheridan
304
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
pears to be a natural love of cleanliness in all other animals."
As to the two former accusations, I was glad to let them pass
without any reply, because I had not a word to offer upon them
in defence of my species, which otherwise I certainly had done
from my own inclinations. But I could have easily vindicated
humankind from the imputation of singularity upon the last
article, if there had been any swine in that country (unluckily
for me there were not), which although it may be sweeter quad-
ruped than a Yahoo, cannot, I humbly conceive, in justice, pre-
tend to more cleanliness: and so his honor himself must have
owned, if he had seen their filthy way of feeding, and their
custom of wallowing and sleeping in the mud.
(C
B
My master likewise mentioned another quality, which his
servants had discovered in several Yahoos, and to him was
wholly unaccountable. He said, a fancy would sometimes
take a Yahoo to retire into a corner, to lie down, and howl, and
groan, and spurn away all that came near him, although he
were young and fat, wanted neither food nor water, nor did the
servant imagine what could possibly ail him. And the only
remedy they found was, to set him to hard work, after which
he would infallibly come to himself." To this I was silent out
of partiality to my own kind; yet here I could plainly discover
the true seeds of spleen, which only seizes on the lazy, the
luxurious, and the rich; who, if they were forced to undergo
the same regimen, I would undertake for the cure.
His honor had farther observed, "that a female Yahoo
would often stand behind a bank or a bush, to gaze on the
young males passing by, and then appear and hide, using many
antic gestures and grimaces, at which time it was observed that
she had a most offensive smell; and when any of the males
advanced, would slowly retire, looking often back, and with a
counterfeit shew of fear, run off into some convenient place,
where she knew the male would follow her.
"At other times, if a female stranger came among them,
three or four of her own sex would get about her, and stare,
and chatter, and grin, and smell her all over; and then turn off
with gestures, that seemed to express contempt and disdain."
Perhaps my master might refine a little in these speculations
which he had drawn from what he observed himself, or had
been told him by others; however, I could not reflect without
some amazement, and much sorrow, that the rudiments of lewd-
ness, coquetry, censure, and scandal, should have place by in-
stinct in womankind.
* Here the word "who," is a nominative without reference to any verb afters
Sheridan,
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
305
I expected every moment that my master, would accuse the
Yahoos of those unnatural appetites in both sexes, so common
among us. But Nature, it seems, has not been so expert a
school-mistress; and these politer pleasures are entirely the
productions of art and reason on our side of the globe.*
CHAPTER VIII.
THE AUTHOR RELATES SEVERAL PARTICULARS OF THE YAHOOS
-THE GREAT VIRTUES OF THE HOUYHNHNMS-THE EDU-
CATION AND EXERCISE OF THEIR YOUTH-THEIR GENERAL
ASSEMBLY.
JUDGING that I ought to have understood human nature
much better than I supposed it possible for my master to do,
it was easy to apply the character he gave of the Yahoos to
myself and my countrymen ; and I believed I could yet make
The Duchess-dowager of Marlborough forgot her ancient hatred of Swift when she
found him a sharer in her misanthropy. In her published opinions, under the head 1736,
she says, "Dean Swift gives the most exact account of kings, ministers, bishops, and courts
of justice, that is possible to be writ. He has certainly a vast deal of wit; and since he
could contribute so much to pulling down the most honest and best-intentioned ministry
that I ever knew (Queen Anne's Whig administration), with the help only of Abigail (Mrs.
Masham), and one or two more, and has certainly stopped the finishing stroke to ruin the
Irish in the project of the halfpence, in spite of all the ministry could do, I cannot help
wishing that we had had his assistance in the opposition; for I could easily forgive him all
the slaps he has given me and the Duke of Marlborough, and have thanked him heartily
whenever he pleased to do good. I never saw him in my life; and though his writings have
entertained me very much, yet I see he writes sometimes for interest, for in his books, he
gives my Lord of Oxford so great a character as if he was speaking of Socrates or Marcus
Antoninus. But when 1 am dead, the reverse of that character will come out, with vouchers
to it under his own hand." (The Duchess was a true prophetess, as appears from Swift's
Notes on Macky, which we have given in the Appendix to Lilliput).
Again, under the same head, she says, "The style of the lords' address puts me in mind
of Dean Swift's account, who I am prodigiously fond of, which he gives of the manner in
which he was introduced to the King of Luggnagg." And again she records, "I most
heartily wish that in this park I had some of the breed of those charming creatures Swift
speaks of, and calls the Houyhnhnms, which I understand to be horses, so extremely
polite, and which had all manner of good conversation, good principles, and that
never told a lie, and charmed him so, that he could not endure his own country when
he returned. He says there is a sort of creature there called Yahoo, and of the same species
with us, only a great deal uglier; but they are kept tied up; and by that glorious creature
the horse, are not permitted to do any mischief; I really have not been pleased so much a
long time as with what he writes. Another point of union between Swift and the Duchess
was their common hatred of Sir Robert Walpole. In 1735, she writes, "The chief must
have great talents, or he could not have compassed what he has. But I do really believe
that there never was any instance in any government of so much brutality, ill principles, and
folly. But which way any of these things can be changed I cannot yet see into.” In 1739,
after a long account of some illness which Walpok had, she adds, "I think it is thought a
fault to wish anybody dead, but I hope it is none to wish he might be hanged, having brought
to ruin so great a country as this might have been
306
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
farther discoveries, from my own observation. I therefore
often begged his honor to let me go among the herds of Yahoos
in the neighborhood; to which he always very graciously con-
sented, being perfectly convinced that the hatred I bore these
brutes would never suffer me to be corrupted by them; and
his honor ordered one of his servants, a strong sorrel nag,
very honest and good-natured, to be my guard; without whose
protection I durst not undertake such adventures. For I have
already told the reader how much I was pestered by these
odious animals, upon my first arrival; and I afterwards failed
very narrowly three or four times of falling into their clutches,
when I happened to stray at any distance without my hanger.
And I have reason to believe they had some imagination that
I was of their own species, which I often assisted myself by
stripping up my sleeves, and showing my naked arms and
breasts in their sight, when my protector was with me. At
which times they would approach as near as they durst, and
imitate my actions after the manner of monkeys, but ever with
great signs of hatred; as a tame jackdaw with cap and stock-
ings is always persecuted by the wild ones, when he happens
to be got among them.
How-
They are prodigiously nimble from their infancy.
ever, I once caught a young male of three years old, and en-
deavored, by all marks of tenderness, to make it quiet; but
the little imp fell a squalling, and scratching, and biting with
such violence, that I was forced to let it go; and it was high
time, for a whole troop of old ones came about us at the noise,
but finding the cub was safe (for away it ran), and my sorrel
nag being by, they durst not venture near us. I observed the
young animal's flesh to smell very rank, and the stink was
somewhat between a weasel and a fox, but much more disagree-
able. I forgot another circumstance (and perhaps I might
have the reader's pardon if it were wholly omitted), that while
I held the odious vermin in my hands, it voided its filthy ex-
crements of a yellow liquid substance all over my clothes; but
by good fortune there was a brook hard by, where I washed
myself as clean as I could; although I durst not come into my
master's presence until I was sufficiently aired.
By what I could discover, the Yahoos appear to be the most-
unteachable of all animals: their capacities never reaching
higher than to draw or carry burdens. Yet I am of opinion,
this defect arises chiefly from a perverse, restive disposition.
For they are cunning, malicious, treacherous, and revengeful.
They are strong and hardy, but of a cowardly spirit, and by
GULLIV
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
30%
consequence insolent, abject, and cruel. It is observed, that
the red-haired of both sexes are more libidinous and mischiev
ous than the rest, whom yet they much exceed in strength and
activity.
The Houyhnhnms keep the Yahoos for present use in huts
'not far from the house; but the rest are sent ab.oad to certain
fields, where they dig up roots, eat several kinds of herbs, and
search about for carrion, r sometimes catch weasels and luhi
muhs (a sort of wild rat), which they greedily devour. Nature
has taught them to dig deep holes with their nails on the side
of a rising ground, wherein they lie by themselves; only the
kennels of the females are larger, sufficient to hold two or three
cubs.
They swim from their infancy like frogs, and are able to
continue long under water, where they often take fish, which
the female carry home to their young. And, upon this occa-
sion, I hope the reader will pardon my relating an odd adven-
ture.
*
Being one day abroad with my protector the sorrel nag,
and the weather exceeding hot, I entreated him to let me
bathe in a river that was near. He consented, and I immedi-
ately stripped myself stark naked, and went down softly into
the stream. It happened that a young female Yahoo standing
behied a bank, saw the whole proceeding, and inflamed by
desire, as the nag and I conjectured, came running with all
speed, and leaped into the water within five yards of the place
where I bathed. I was never in my life so terribly frightened.
The nag was grazing at some distance, not suspecting any
harm. She embraced me after a most fulsome manner. I
roared as loud as I could, and the nag came galloping towards
me, whereupon she quitted her grasp, with the utmost reluc-
tancy, and leaped upon the opposite bank, where she stood
gazing and howling all the time I was putting on my clothes.
This was a matter of diversion to my master and his family,
as well as of mortification to myself. For now I could no
longer deny that I was a real Yahoo, in every limb and feature,
since the females had a natural propensity to me, as one of
their own species; neither was the hair of this brute of a red
color (which might have been some excuse for an appetite a
little irregular), but black as a sloe, and her countenance did
not make an appearance altogether so hideous as the rest of
her kind; for I think she could not be above eleven years old.
Having lived three years in this country, the reader, I sup-
pose, will expect that I should, like other travellers, give him
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GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
some account of the manners and customs of its inhabitants,
which it was, indeed, my principal study to learn.
As these noble Houyhnhnms are endowed by nature with a
general disposition to all virtues, and have no conceptions or
ideas of what is evil in a rational creature; so their grand
maxim is, to cultivate reason, and to be wholly governed by it.
Neither is reason among them a point problematical, as with
us, where men can argue with plausibility on both sides of the
question; but strikes you with immediate conviction; as it
must needs do, where it is not mingled, obscured, or discolored,
by passion and interest. I remember it was with extreme diffi-
culty that I could bring my master to understand the meaning
of the word opinion, or how a point could be disputable; be-
cause reason taught us to affirm or deny only where we are
certain; and beyond our knowledge we cannot do either. So
that controversies, wranglings, disputes, and positiveness, in
false or dubious propositions, are evils unknown among the
Houyhnhnms. In the like manner, when I used to explain to
him our several systems of natural philosophy, he would laugh,
"that a creature pretending to reason, should value itself upon
the knowledge of other people's conjectures, and in things
where that knowledge, if it were certain, could be of no use.'
Wherein he agreed entirely with the sentiments of Socrates, as
Plato delivers them; which I mentioned as the highest honor
I can do that prince of philosophers. I have often since re-
flected, what destruction such doctrine would make in the
libraries of Europe; and how many paths of fame would be
then shut up in the learned world.
""
Friendship and benevolence are two principal virtues among
the Houyhnhnms; and these are not confined to particular
objects, but universal to the whole race. For a stranger from
the remotest part is equally treated with the nearest neighbor;
and wherever he goes, looks upon himself as at home. They
preserve decency and civility in the highest degrees, but are
altogether igno.ant of ceremony. They have no fondness for
their colts or foals, but the care they take in educating them
proceeds entirely from the dictates of reason. And I observed
my master to show the same affection to his neighbor's issue,
that he had for his own. They will have it that nature teaches
them to love the whole species, and it is reason only that makes
a distinction of persons, where there is a superior degree of
virtue.
*
When the matron Houyhnhnms have produced one of each
sex, they no longer accompany with their consorts, except they
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
309
lose one of their issue by some casualty, which very seldom
happens; but in such a case they meet again; or when the
like accident befalls a person whose wife is past bearing, some
other couple bestow on him one of their own colts, and then
go together again until the mother is pregnant. This caution
is necessary, to prevent the country from being overburdened
with numbers. But the race of inferior Houyhnhnms bred up
to be servants, is not so strictly limited upon this article;
these are allowed to produce three of each sex, to be domestics
in the noble families.
In their marriages, they are exactly careful to choose such
colors as will not make any disagreeable mixture in the breed.
Strength is chiefly valued in the male, and comeliness in the
female not upon the account of love, but to preserve the race
from degenerating; for where a female happens to excel in
strength, a consort is chosen with regard to comeliness.
Courtship, love, presents, jointures, settlements, have no
place in their thoughts; or terms whereby to express them in
their language. The young couple meet, and are joined,
merely because it is the determination of their parents and
friends it is what they see done every day, and they look
upon it as one of the necessary actions of a reasonable being.
But the violation of marriage, of any other unchastity, was
never heard of, and the married pair pass their lives with the
same friendship and mutual benevolence that they bear to all
others of the same species who come in their way; without
jealousy, fondness, quarrelling, or discontent.
In educating the youth of both sexes, their method is `ad-
mirable, and highly deserves our imitation. These are not
suffered to taste a grain of oats, except upon certain days, till
eighteen years old; nor milk, but very rarely; and in summer
they graze two hours in the morning, and as many in the even-
ing, which their parents likewise observe; but the servants are
not allowed above half that time, and a great part of their
grass is brought home, which they eat at the most convenient
hours, when they can be best spared from work.
Temperance, industry, exercise, and cleanliness, are the
lessons equally enjoined to the young ones of both sexes: and
my master thought it monstrous in us, to give the females a
different kind of education from the males, except in some
articles of domestic management; whereby, as he truly ob-
served, one half of our natives were good for nothing but bring-
ing children into the world: and to trust the care of our chil-
dren to such useless animals, he said, was yet a greater instance
of brutality.
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GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
But the Houyhnhnms train up their youths to strength,
speed, and hardiness, by exercising them in running races up
and down steep hills, and over hard stony grounds; and when
they are all in a sweat they are ordered to leap over head and
ears into a pond or river. Four times a year the youth of a
certain district meet to show their proficiency in running and
leaping, and other feats of strength and agility; where the
victor is rewarded with a song in his or her praise. On this
festival, the servants drive a herd of Yahoos into the field,
laden with hay, and oats, and milk, for a repast to the Houy-
hnhnms, after which these brutes are immediately driven back
again, for fear of being noisome to the assembly.
Every fourth year, at the vernal equinox, there is a repre-
sentative council of the whole nation, which meets in a plain
about twenty miles from our house, and continues about five
or six days. Here they inquire into the state and condition of
the several districts; whether they abound or be deficient in
hay, or oats, or cows, or Yahoos; and wherever there is any
want (which is but seldom) it is immediately supplied by unan-
imous consent and contribution. Here likewise the regula-
tion of children is settled: as for instance, if a Houyhnhnm
has two males, he changes one of them with another that has
two females: and when a child has been lost by any casualty,
where the mother is past breeding, it is determined what family
in the district shall breed another to supply the loss.*
"
Bishop Warburton, in a work originally published anonymously, gives the following
severe review of Swift. "The religious author of the Tale of a Tub will tell you reli-
gion is but a reservoir for tools and madmen; and the virtuous Lemuel Gulliver will
answer for the state, that it is a den of savages and cut-throats. Let it be as they say, that
ridicule and satire are the supplement of public laws, should not then the ends of both be
the same-the benefit of mankind? But where is the sense of a general satire, if the whole
species be degenerated? And where is the justice of it if it be not? The punishment of
lunatics is as wise as the one, and a general execution as honest as the other; in short, a
general satire is the work only of ill men or little geniuses. The immortal Socrates em-
ployed his wit to better purpose; his vein was rich but frugal; he thought the laugh came
too dear when bought at the expense of probity, and therefore laid it all out in the improve-
ment and reform of manners. But, not to be partial to antiquity, it must be owned that
even then, for one Socrates to reform, it had a Democritus to sneer, a Diogenes to snarl,
nay, even an Heraclitus to weep, at human obliquity. So much easier has it always been to
invent a false philosophy on the credit of a prevailing passion, than to use even the first
principles of reason to curb and restrain it. And here it is well worth observing that he of
all those whom the world treated most severely, was the reformer; as he who most grossly
abused his reason, even to the arguing against geometrical_demonstration, was the scoffer.
Again at the revival of letters, a second Socrates arose in Erasmus, a Democritus in Rabe-
lais, and a Diogenes in Peter Aretin. And again, the well-directed raillery of the great
reformer drew down against its author more enemies than did all the filth, scurrility, and
impieties of the buffoon and cynic.”—A Critical Enquiry into Prodigies, etc., pp. 32-34,
London, 1735•
Bishop Percy, late Bishop of Dromore, in one of his unpublished MSS., makes the
following comment on the description of the Houyhnhnms and their policy: "That which
surprises me most in the Dean's work is his forgetting himself so much in his haste, as to
leave religion out of the idea of a perfect republic. Since he gave reason to his horses, he
might consistently enough have given them a little natural religion.”
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
311
CHAPTER IX.
A GRAND DEBATE AT THE GENERAL ASSEMBLY OF THE HOUYHN-
HNMS, AND HOW IT WAS DETERMINED-THE LEARNING OF
THE HOUYHNHNMS-THEIR BUILDINGS-THEIR MANNER OF
BURIALS THE DEFECTIVENESS OF THEIR LANGUAGE.
UNANIMITY generally prevails in the decisions of the councils
of the Houyhnhnms, even when the members come together
with different opinions, for no Houyhnhnm is ashamed to be-
come a convert to reason and argument. One of these grand
assemblies was held in my time, about three months before my
departure, whither my master went as the representative of our
district. In this council was resumed their old debate, and
indeed the only debate that ever happened in their country;
whereof my master, after his return, gave me a very particular
account.
The question to be debated was, 'whether the Yahoos
should be exterminated from the face of the earth?" One of
the members for the affirmative offered several arguments of
great strength and weight, alleging, "that as the Yahoos were
the most filthy, noisome, and deformed animal which nature
ever produced, so they were the most restive and indocible,
mischievous and malicious; they would privately suck the teats
of the Houyhnhnms' cows, kill and devour their cats, trample
down their oats and grass, if they were not continually watched,
and commit a thousand other extravagances. He took notice
of a general tradition "that Yahoos had not been always in
their country; but that, many ages ago, two of these brutes
appeared together upon a mountain; whether produced by the
heat of the sun upon corrupted mud and slime, or from the
ooze and froth of the sea, was never known; that these Yahoos
engendered, and their brood, in a short time, grew so numerous
as to overrun and infest the whole nation; that the Houyhnhnms,
to get rid of this evil, made a general hunting, and at last in-
closed the whole herd; and destroying the elder, every Houy-
hnhnm kept two young ones in a kennel, and brought them to
such a degree of tameness, as an animal, so savage by nature,
can be capable of acquiring; using them for draught and `car-
riage that there seemed to be much truth in this tradition, and
that those creatures could not be ylnhniamshy (or aborigines of
""
312
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
the land), because of the violent hatred the Houyhnhnms, as
well as all other animals bore them, which, although their evil
disposition sufficiently deserved, could never have arrived at so
high a degree, if they had been aborigines; or else they would
have long since been rooted out; that the inhabitants, taking a
fancy to use the service of the Yahoos, had very imprudently
neglected to cultivate the breed of asses, which are a comely
animal, easily kept, more tame and orderly, without any offen-
sive smell; strong enough for labor, although they yield to the
other in agility of body; and if their braying be no agreeable
sound, it is far preferable to the horrible howlings of the
Yahoos."
Several others declared their sentiments to the same pur-
pose, when my master proposed an expedient to the assembly,
whereof he had indeed borrowed the nint from me.
"He
approved of the tradition mentioned by the honorable member
who spoke before, and affirmed, that the two Yahoos said to be
seen first among them, had been driven thither over the sea;
that coming to land, and being forsaken by their companions,
they retired to the mountains, and degenerating by degrees,
became in process of time much more savage than those of
their own species in the country whence these two originals
came. The reason of this assertion was, that he had now in
his possession a certain wonderful Yahoo (meaning myself),
which most of them had heard of, and many of them had seen.
He then related to them how he first found me: that my body
was all covered with an artificial composure of the skins and
hairs of other animals; that I spoke in a language of my own,
and had thoroughly learned theirs; that I had related to him
the accidents which brought me thither; that when he saw me
without my covering, I was an exact Yahoo in every part, only
of a whiter color, less hairy, and with shorter claws. He added
how I had endeavored to persuade him, that in my own and
other countries, the Yahoos acted as the governing, rational
animal, and held the Houyhnhnms in servitude; that he ob
served in me all the qualities of a Yahoo, only a little more
civilized by some tincture of reason, which, however, was in a
degree as far inferior to the Houyhnhnm race, as the Yahoos of
their country were to me; that among other things I mentioned
a custom we had of castrating Houyhnhnms when they were
young, in order to render them tame; that the operation was
easy and safe; that it was no shame to learn wisdom from
brutes, as industry is taught by the ant, and building by the
swallow (for so I translate the word lyhannh, although it be a
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
i
313
nuch larger fowl); that this invention might be practiced upon
the younger Yahoos here, which, beside rendering them tract-
able and fitter for use, would in an age put an end to the whole
species, without-destroying life; that in the meantime the
Houyhnhnms should be exhorted to cultivate the breed of asses,
which, as they are in all respects more valuable brutes, so they
have this advantage, to be fit for service at five years old, which
he others are not till twelve."
This was all my master thought fit to tell me at that time,
of what passed in the grand council. But he was pleased to
conceal one particular, which related personally to myself,
whereof I soon felt the unhappy effect, as the reader will know
in its proper place, and whence I date all the succeeding mis-
ortunes of my life.
The Houyhnhnms have no letters, and consequently their
knowledge is all traditional. But there happening few events
of any moment among a people so well united, naturally dis-
posed to every virtue, wholly governed by reason, and cut off
from all commerce with other nations; the historical part is
easily preserved without burdening their memories. I have
already observed that they are subject to no diseases, and there-
fore can have no need of physicians. However, they have
excellent medicines, composed of herbs, to cure accidental
bruises and cuts in the pastern or frog of the foot, by sharp
stones, as well as other maims and hurts in the several parts of
the body.
They calculate the year by the revolution of the sun and the
moon, but use no subdivisions into weeks. They are well
enough acquainted with the motions of those two luminaries,
and understand the nature of eclipses; and this is the utmost
progress of their astronomy.
In poetry, they must be allowed to excel all other mortals;
wherein the justness of their similes, and the minuteness as
well as exactness of their descriptions, are indeed inimitable.
Their verses abound very much in both of these, and usually
contain either some exalted notions of friendship and benevo-
lence, or the praises of those who were victors in races and
other bodily exercises. Their buildings, although very rude
and simple, are not inconvenient but well contrived to defend
them from all injuries of cold and heat. They have a kind of
tree, which at forty years old loosens in the root, and falls with
the first storm; it grows very straight, and being pointed like
stakes with a sharp stone (for the Houyhnhnms know not the
use of iron), they stick them erect in the ground, about ten
314
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
inches asunder, and then weave in oat-straw, or sometimes
wattles between them. The roof is made after the same man-
ner, and so are the doors.
The Houyhnhnms use the hollow part, between the pastern
and the hoof of the forefoot, as we do our hands, and this with
greater dexterity than I could at first imagine. I have seen a
white mare of our family thread a needle (which I lent her on
purpose) with that joint. They milk their cows, reap their oats,
and do all the work which requires hands, in the same manner.
They have a kind of hard flints, which by grinding against
other stones, they form into instruments, that serve instead of
wedges, axes, and hammers. With tools made of these flints,
they likewise cut their hay, and reap their oats, which there
grow naturally in several fields; the Yahoos draw home the
sheaves in carriages, and the servants tread them in certain
covered huts to get out the grain, which is kept in stores. They
make a rude kind of earthen and wooden vessels, and bake
the former in the sun.
If they can avoid casualties, they die only of old age, and
are buried in the obscurest places that can be found, their
friends and relations expressing neither joy nor grief at their
departure; nor does the dying person discover the least regret
that he is leaving the world, any more than if he were upon re-
turning home from a visit to one of his neighbors. I remem
ber my master having once made an appointment with a friend
and his family to come to his house, upon some affair of impor
tance on the day fixed, the mistress and her two children
came very late; she made two excuses, first for her husband,
who, as she said, happened that very morning to Ihnuwnh
The word is strongly expressive in their language, but not easily
rendered into English; it signifies, "to retire to his first mother."
Her excuse for not coming sooner, was, that her husband dying
late in the morning, she was a good while consulting her ser-
vants about a convenient place where his body should be laid;
and I observed, she behaved herself at our house as cheerfully
as the rest; she died about three months after.
They live generally to seventy or seventy-five years, very
seldom to fourscore: some weeks before their death, they feel
a gradual decay; but without pain. During this time they are
much visited by their friends, because they cannot go abroad
with their usual ease and satisfaction. However, about ten
days before their death, which they seldom fail in computing,
they return the visits that have been made them by those who
are nearest in the neighborhood, being carried in a convenient
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
315
sledge drawn by Yahoos; which vehicle they use, not only upon
this occasion, but when they grow old, upon long journeys, or
when they are lamed by any accident; and therefore, when the
dying Houyhnhnms return those visits, they take a solemn leave
of their friends, as if they were going to some remote part of
the country, where they designed to pass the rest of their
lives.
I know not whether it may be worth observing, that the
Houyhnhnms have no word in their language to express any-
thing that is evil, except what they borrow from the deformities
or ill qualities of the Yahoos. Thus, they denote the folly of
a servant, an omission of a child, a stone that cuts their feet,
a continuance of foul or unseasonable weather, and the like,
by adding to each the epithet of Yahoo. For instance, hhnm
Yahoo, whnaholm Yahoo, ynlhmndwihlma Yahoo, and an ill-
contrived house ynholmhnmrohlnw Yahoo.
I could, with great pleasure, enlarge farther upon the man-
ners and virtues of this excellent people; but intending in a
short time to publish a volume by itself, expressly upon that
subject, I refer the reader thither; and, in the meantime, pro-
ceed to relate my own sad catastrophe.
CHAPTER X.
THE AUTHOR'S ECONOMY AND HAPPY LIFE AMONG THE HOUY-
HNHNMS-HIS GREAT IMPROVEMENT IN VIRTUE BY CON-
VERSING WITH THEM-THEIR CONVERSATIONS-THE AUTHOR
HAS NOTICE GIVEN HIM BY HIS MASTER, THAT HE MUST
DEPART FROM THE COUNTRY-HE FALLS INTO A SWOON
FOR GRIEF, BUT SUBMITS-HE CONTRIVES AND FINISHES A
CANOE BY THE HELP OF A FELLOW-SERVANT, AND PUT TO
SEA AT A VENTURE.
JUST at this time I had settled my little economy to my own
heart's content. My master had ordered a room to be made
for me, after their manner, about six yards from the house: the
sides and floors of which I plastered with clay, and covered
with rushmats of my own contriving; I had beaten hemp, which
there grows wild, and made of it a sort of ticking; this I filled
with the feathers of several birds I had taken with springes
316
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
made of Yahoos' hairs, and * were excellent food. I had
worked two chairs with my knife, the sorrel nag helping me in
the grosser and more laborious part. When my clothes were
worn to rags, I made myself others with the skins of rabbits, and
of a certain beautiful animal, about the same size, called nnuhnoh,
the skin of which is covered with a fine down. Of these I also
made very tolerable stockings. I soled my shoes with wood,
which I cut from a tree, and fitted to the upper leather; and
when this was worn out, I supplied it with the skins of Yahoos
dried in the sun. I often got honey out of hollow trees, which
I mingled with water, or ate with my bread. No man could
more verify the truth of these two maxims, "That nature is
very easily satisfied;" and, "That necessity is the mother of
invention." I enjoyed perfect health of body, and tranquillity
of mind; I did not feel the treachery or inconstancy of a friend,
nor the injuries of a secret or open enemy. I had no occasion
of bribing, flattering, or pimping, to procure the favor of any
great man, or of his minion. I wanted no fence against fraud
or oppression: here was neither physician to destroy my body,
nor lawyer to ruin my fortune; no informer to watch my words
and actions, or forge accusations against me for hire: here were
no gibers, censurers, backbiters, pickpockets, highwaymen,
housebreakers, attorneys, bawds, buffoons, gamesters, politi
cians, wits, splenetics, tedious talkers, controvertists, ravishers,
inurderers, robbers, virtuosoes; no leaders, or followers, of
party and faction; no encouragers to vice, by seducement or
examples; no dungeon, axes, gibbets, whipping-posts, or pillor
ies; no cheating shopkeepers or mechanics; no pride, vanity,
or affectation; no fops, bullies, drunkards, strolling whores, or
poxes; no ranting, lewd, expensive wives; no stupid, proud
pedants; no importunate, overbearing, quarrelsome, noisy, roar-
ing, empty, conceited, swearing companions; no scoundrels
raised from the dust upon the merit of their vices, or nobility
thrown into it on account of their virtues; no lords, fiddlers,
judges, or dancing-masters.
I had the favor of being admitted to several Houyhnhnms
who came to visit or dine with my master; where his honor
graciously suffered me to wait in the room, and listen to their
discourse. Both he and his companion would often descend to
ask me questions, and receive my answers. I had also some-
It should be, and "which" were excellent food. This sentence is faulty in other
iespects; but there, as well as in other passages of these Voyages, the author has inten-
tionally made use of inaccurate expression and studied negligence, in order to make the
style more like that of a seafaring man; on which account they have been passed over in
silence, where such intention was obvious.-Sheridan.
SECRE
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
317
times the honor of attending my master in his visits to others.
I never presumed to speak, except in answer to a question;
and then I did it with inward regret, because it was a loss of
so much time for improving myself: but I was infinitely de-
lighted with the station of an humble auditor in such conversa-
tions, where nothing passed but what was useful, expressed in
the fewest and most significant words: - where, as I have already
'said, the greatest decency was observed without the least de-
gree of ceremony; where no person spoke without being
pleased himself, and pleasing his companions; where there was
no interruption, tediousness, heat, or difference of sentiments.
They have a notion, that when people are met together, a short
silence does much improve conversation; this I found to be
true; for, during those little intermissions of talk, new ideas
would arise in their minds, which very much enlivened the dis-
course. Their subjects are generally on frendship and benevo-
lence, on order and economy; sometimes upon the visible oper-
ations of nature, or ancient traditions; upon the bonds and
limits of virtue; upon the unerring rules of reason, or upon
some determinations to be taken at the next great assem-
bly; and often upon the various excellences of poetry. I
may add, without vanity, that my presence often gave them
sufficient matter for discourse, because it afforded my master
an occasion of letting his friends into the history of me and my
country, upon which they were all pleased to descant, in a man
ner not very advantageous to humankind; and for that reason
I shall not repeat what they said: only I may be allowed to ob-
serve, that his honor, to my great admiration, appeared to under-
stand the nature of Yahoos much better than myself. He went
through all our vices and follies, and discovered many, which I
had never mentioned to him, by only supposing what qualities
a Yahoo of their country, with a small proportion of reason,
might be capable of exerting; and concluded, with too much
probability, "how vile, as well as miserable such a creature
must be."
I freely confess, that all the little knowledge I have of any
value, was acquired by the lectures I received from my master,
and from hearing the discourses of him and his friends; to
which I should be prouder to listen, than to dictate to the
greatest and wisest assembly in Europe. I admired the strength,
comeliness, and speed of the inhabitants; and such a constel-
lation of virtues, in such amiable persons, produced in me
the highest veneration. At first, indeed, I did not feel that
natural awe, which the Yahoos and all other animals bear
318
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
towards them; but it grew upon me by degrees, much sooner
than I imagined, and was mingled with a respectful love and
gratitude, that they would condescend to distinguish me from
the rest of my species.
When I thought of my family, my friends, my countrymen,
or the human race in general, I considered them, as they really
were, Yahoos in shape and disposition, perhaps a little more
civilized, and qualified with the gift of speech; but making no
other use of reason than to improve and multiply those vices,
whereof their brethren in this country had only the share that
nature allotted them. When I happened to behold the reflec-
tion of my own form in a lake or a fountain, I turned away my
face in horror and detestation of myself; and could better en-
dure the sight of a common Yahoo, than of my own person.
By conversing with the Houyhnhnms and looking upon them
with delight, I fell to imitate their gait and gestures, which is
now grown into a habit; and my friends often tell me, in a
blunt way, "that I trot like a horse;" which, however, I take
for a great compliment: neither shall I disown, that in speak.
ing I am apt to fall into the voice and manner of the Houy
hnhnms, and hear myself ridiculed on that account, without the
least mortification.
In the midst of all this happiness, and when I looked upon
myself to be fully settled for life, my master sent for me one
morning a little earlier than his usual hour; I observed by his
countenance that he was in some perplexity, and at a loss how
to begin what he had to speak. After a short silence he told
me, "he did not know how I would take what he was going to
say that in the last general assembly, when the affair of the
Yahoos was entered upon, the representatives had taken offence
at his keeping a Yahoo (meaning myself) in his family, more
like a Houyhnhnm than a brute animal; that he was known
frequently to converse with me, as if he could receive some
advantage or pleasure in my company; that such a practice
was not agreeable to reason or nature, or a thing ever heard of
before among them; the assembly did therefore exhort him
either to employ me like the rest of my species, or command
'me to swim back to the place whence I came: that the first of
these expedients was utterly rejected by all the Houyhnhnms
who had ever seen me at his house or their own; for they
alleged, that because I had some rudiments of reason, added to
the natural gravity of those animals, it was to be feared I might
be able to seduce them into the woody and mountainous parts
of the country, and bring them in troops by night to destroy
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
319
the Houyhnhnms' cattle, as being naturally of the ravenous kind,
and averse from labor."
My master added, "that he was daily pressed by the Houy-
hnhnms of the neighborhood, to have the assembly's exhortation
executed, which he could not put off much longer. He doubted
it would be impossible for me to swim to another country; and
therefore wished I would contrive some sort of a vehicle, re-
sembling those I had described to him, that might carry me on
the sea; in which work I should have the assistance of his own
servants, as well as those of his neighbors." He concluded,
"that for his own part, he could have been content to keep me
in his service as long as I lived; because he found I had cured
myself of some bad habits and dispositions, by endeavoring, as
far as my inferior nature was capable, to imitate the Houy-
hnhnms.
I should here observe to the reader, that a decree of the
general assembly in this country is expressed by the word
hnhloayn, which signifies an exhortation, as near as I can ren-
der it for they have no conception how a rational creature can
be compelled, but only advised, or exhorted; because no per-
son can disobey reason, without giving up his claim to be a
rational creature.
I was struck with the utmost grief and despair at my mas
ter's discourse; and being unable to support the agonies I was
under, I fell into a swoon at his feet. When I came to myself,
he told me, ،، that he concluded I had been dead;" for these
people are subject to no such imbecilities of nature. I answered
in a faint voice, "that death would have been too great a hap-
piness; that although I could not blame the assembly's exhor
tation, or the urgency of his friends; yet, in my weak and cor-
rupt judgment, I thought it might consist with reason to have
been less rigorous: that I could not swim a league, and proba-
bly the nearest land to theirs might be distant above a hundred :
that many materials, necessary for making a small vessel to
carry me off, were wholly wanting in this country; which, how-
ever, I would attempt, in obedience and gratitude to his honor,
although I concluded the thing to be impossible, and therefore
looked on myself as already devoted to destruction: that the
certain prospect of an unnatural death was the least of my evils;
for, supposing I should escape with life by some strange adven-
ture, how could I think with temper of passing my days among
Yahoos, and relapsing into my old corruptions for want of ex-
amples to lead and keep me within the paths of virtue? that I
knew too well upon what solid reasons all the determinations
320
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
•
of the wise Houyhnhnms were founded, not to be shaken oy
arguments of mine, a miserable Yahoo; and therefore, after
presenting him with my humble thanks for the offer of his ser-
vants' assistance in making a vessel, and desiring a reasonable
time for so difficult a work, I told him I would endeavor to
preserve a wretched being; and if ever I returned to England,
was not without hopes of being useful to my own species, by
celebrating the praises of the renowned Houyhnhnms, and pro-
posing their virtues to the imitation of mankind.”
My master, in a few words, made a very gracious reply;
allowed me the space of two months to finish my boat; and
ordered the sorrel nag, my fellow-servant (for so at this distance
I may presume to call him), to follow my instruction, because
I told my master, "that his help would be sufficient, and I
knew he had a tenderness for me."
In his company, my first business was to go to that part of
the coast where my rebellious crew had ordered me to be set
on shore. I got upon a height, and looking on every side into
the sea, fancied I saw a small island towards the north-east ; I
took out my pocket-glass, and could then clearly disting aish it
about five leagues off, as I computed: but it appeared to the
sorrel nag to be only a blue cloud: for as he had no conception
of any country beside his own, so he could not be as expert in
distinguishing remote objects at sea, as we who so much con-
verse * in that element.
After I had discovered this island, I considered no farther
but resolved it should, if possible, be the first place of my ban-
ishment, leaving the consequence to fortune.
I returned home, and consulting with the sorrel nag, we
went into a copse at some distance, where I with my knife, and
he with a sharp flint, fastened very artificially after their manner
to a wooden handle, cut down several oak wattles, about the
thickness of a walking staff, and some larger pieces. But I
shall not trouble the reader with a particular description of my
own mechanics; let it suffice to say, that in six weeks' time,
with the help of the sorrel nag, who performed the parts that,
required most labor, I finished a sort of Indian canoe, but
much larger, covering it with the skins of Yahoos, well stitched
together with hempen threads of my own making. My sail
was likewise composed of the skins of the same animal; but 1
made use of the youngest I could get, the older being too
~
*This is an uncommon use of the word "converse:" instead of the verb, the adjective
i always employed in this sense; as thus-"as we who are so conversant in that element."
Sheridan.
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
321
tough and thick ; and I likewise provided myself with four pad-
dles. I laid in a stock of boiled flesh of rabbits and fowls
;
and took with me two vessels, or filled with milk and the
other with water.
I tried my canoe in a large pond, near my master's house,
and then corrected in it what was amiss; stopping all the
chinks with Yahoos' tallow, till I found it stanch, and able to
bear me and my freight; and, when it was as complete as I
could possibly make it, I had it drawn on a carriage very gently
by Yahoos to the seaside, under the conduct of the sorrel nag
and another servant,
When all was ready, and the day came for my departure, I
took leave of my master, and lady, and the whole family, my
eyes flowing with tears, and my heart quite sunk with grief. But
his honor, out of curiosity, and perhaps (if I may speak it with-
out vanity) partly out of kindness, was determined to see me in
my canoe; and got several of his neighboring friends to accom-
pany him. I was forced to wait above an hour for the tide, and
then observing the wind very fortunately bearing towards the
island to which I intended to steer my course, I took a second
leave of my master: but as I was going to prostrate myself to
kiss his hoof, he did me the honor to raise it gently to my
mouth. I am not ignorant how much I have been censured for
mentioning this last particular. Detractors are pleased to think
it improbable, that so illustrious a person should descend to
give so great a mark of distinction to a creature so inferior as I.
Neither have I forgotten how apt some travellers are to boast
of extraordinary favors they have received. But, if these cen-
surers were better acquainted with the noble and courteous
disposition of the Houyhnhnms, they would soon change their
opinion.
I paid my respects to the rest of the Honyhnhnms in his
honor's company; then getting into my canoe, I pushed off
from the shore.
21
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
CHAPTER XI.
THE AUTHOR'S DANGEROUS VOYAGE-HE ARRIVES AT NEW HOL
LAND, HOPING TO SETTLE THERE-IS WOUNDED WITH AN
ARROW BY ONE OF THE NATIVES—IS SEIZED AND CARRIED
EY FORCE INTO A PORTUGUESE SHIP THE GREAT CIVILI-
MIES OF THE CAPTAIN-THE AUTHOR ARRIVES AT ENG-
LAND.
JUST at nine o'clock in the morning of February 15, 1714-
15, I began this desperate voyage. The wind was very favor-
able; however, I made use at first only of my paddles; but
considering I should soon be weary, and that the wind might
chop about, I ventured to set up my little sail; and thus, with
the help of the tide, I went at the rate of a league and a half
an hour, as near as I could guess. My master and his friends
continued on the shore till I was almost out of sight; and I
often heard the sorrel nag (who always loved me) crying out,
“Hnuy illa nyha majah Yahoo; "-Take care of thyself, gentle
Yahoo.
My design was, if possible, to discover some small island
uninhabited, yet sufficient by my labor to furnish me with the
necessaries of life, which I would have thought a greater happi
ness, than to be first minister in the politest court of Europe;
so horrible was the idea I conceived of returning to live in the
society, and under the government of Yahoos. For in such a sol
itude as I desired, I could at least enjoy my own thoughts, and
reflect with delight on the virtues of those inimitable Houyhn
hnms, without any opportunity of degenerating into the vices
and corruptions of my own species.
The reader may remember what I related, when my crew
conspired against me, and confined me to my cabin; how I
continued there several weeks without knowing what course we
took, and when I was put ashore in the longboat, how the sailors
told me with oaths, whether true or false, "that they knew not
in what part of the world we were." However, I did then be
lieve us to be about 10 degrees southward of the Cape of Good
Hope, or about 45 degrees southern latitude, as I gathered
from some general words I overheard among them, being I
supposed to the south-east in their intended voyage to Mada-
gascar. And although this were little better than conjecture,
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
323
yet I resolved to steer my course eastward, hoping to reach the
south-west coast of New Holland, and perhaps some such island
as I desired, lying westward of it. The wind was full west, and
by six in the evening I computed I had gone eastward at least
eighteen leagues; when I spied a very small island about half
a league off, which I soon reached. It was nothing but a rock,
with one creek naturally arched by the force of tempests. Here
I put in my canoe, and climbing a part of the rock, I could
plainly discover land to the east, extending from south to north.
I lay all night in my canoe; and repeating my voyage early in
the morning, I arrived in seven hours to the south-east point of
New Holland. This confirmed me in the opinion I have long
entertained, that the maps and charts place this country at
least three degrees more to the east than it really is; which
thought I communicated many years ago to my worthy friend,
Mr. Herman Moll, and gave him my reasons for it, although he
has rather chosen to follow other authors.
I saw no inhabitants in the place where I landed, and being
unarmed, I was afraid of venturing far into the country. I
found some shellfish on the shore, and ate them raw, not daring
to kindle a fire, for fear of being discovered by the natives. I
continued three days feeding on oysters and limpets, to save
my own provision; and I fortunately found a brook of excellent
water, which gave me great relief.
On the fourth day, venturing out early a little too far, I saw
twenty or thirty natives upon a height not above five hundred
yards from me. They were stark naked, men, women, and
children, round a fire, as I could discover by the smoke. One
of them spied me, and gave notice to the rest; five of them ad-
vanced towards me, leaving the women and children at the fire.
I made what haste I could to the shore, and, getting into my
canoe, shoved the savages, observing me retreat, ran after
me, and before could get far enough into the sea, discharged
an arrow, which wounded me deeply on the inside of my left
knee: I shall carry the mark to my grave. I apprehended the
arrow might be poisoned, and paddling out of the reach of their
darts (being a calm day), I made a shift to suck the wound, and
dress it as well as I could.
:
I was at a loss what to do, for I durst not return to the same
landing-place, but stood to the north, and was forced to paddle;
for the wind, though very gentle, was against me, blowing north-
west. As I was looking about for a secure landing-place, I saw
a sail to the north-north-east, which appearing every minute
more visible, I was in some doubt whether I should wait for
324
GULI-IVER'S TRAVELS.
rhem or not; but at last my detestation of the Yahoo race pre-
vuled; and turning my canoe, I sailed and paddled together
to the south, and got into the same creek whence I set out in
the morning, choosing rather to trust myself among these bar-
barians, than live with European Yahoos. I drew up my canoe
as close as I could to the shore, and hid myself behind a stone
by the little brook, which, as I have already said, was excellent
water.
The ship came within half a league of this creek, and sent
her longboat with vessels to take in fresh water (for the place
it seems was very well known), but I did not observe it, till the
boat was almost on shore; and it was too late to seek another
hiding-place. The seamen at their landing observed my canoe,
and rummaging it all over, easily conjectured that the owner
could not be far off. Four of them, well armed, searched every
cranny and lurking-hole, till at last they found me flat on my
-face behind the stone, They gazed awhile in admiration at my
strange uncouth dress; my coat made of skins, my wooden
soled shoes, and my furred stockings; whence, however, they.
concluded I was not a native of the place, who all go naked.
One of the seamen, in Portuguese, bid me rise, and asked me
who I was. I understood that language very well, and getting
upon my feet, said, "I was a poor Yahoo, banished from the
Houyhnhnms, and desired they would please to let me depart."
They admired to hear me answer them in their own tongue, and
saw by my complexion I must be a European; but were at a
loss to know what I meant by Yahoos and Houyhnhnms; and
at the same time fell a laughing at my strange tone in speaking,
which resembled the neighing of a horse. I trembled all the
while betwixt fear and hatred. I again desired leave to depart,
and was gently moving to my canoe: but they laid hold of me,
desiring to know "what country I was of? whence I came ?
with many other questions. I told them "I was born in Eng-
land, whence I came about five years ago, and then their coun-
try and ours were at peace. I therefore hoped they would not
treat me as an enemy, since I meant them no harm; but was
a poor Yahoo, seeking some desolate place where to pass the
remainder of his unfortunate life.”
When they began to talk, I thought I never heard or saw
anything so unnatural; for it appeared to me as monstrous as
if a dog or a cow should speak in England, or a Yahoo in
Houyhnhnmland. The honest Portuguese were equally amazed
at my strange dress, and the odd manner of delivering my
words, which, however, they understood very well. They spoke
The
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
325
o me with great humanity, and said, "they were sure the cap
tain would carry me gratis to Lisbon, whence I might return to
my own country; that two of the seamen would go back to the
ship, inform the captain of what they had seen, and receive his
orders; in the mean time, unless I would give my solemn oath
not to fly, they would secure me by force." I thought it best.
to comply with their proposal. They were very curious to know
my story, but I gave them very little satisfaction, and they ali
conjectured that my misfortunes had impaired my reason. In
two hours the boat, which went laden with vessels of water,
returned with the captain's command to fetch me on board.
fell on my knees to preserve my liberty; but all was in vain ;
and the men having tied me with cords, heaved me into the
boat, whence I was taken into the ship, and thence into the
captain's cabin.
ļ
His name was Pedro de Mendez; he was a very courteous
and generous person. He entreated me to give some account
of myself, and desired to know what I would eat or drink: said,
"I should be used as well as himself;" and spoke so many
obliging things, that I wondered to find such civilities from a
Yahoo. However, I remained silent and sullen; I was ready
to faint at the very smell of him and his men. At last I de-
sired something to eat out of my own canoe; but he ordered
me a chicken, and some excellent wine, and then directed that
I should be put to bed in a very clean cabin. I would not un-
dress myself, but lay on the bedclothes, and in half an hour
stole out when I thought the men were at dinner, and getting
to the side of the ship, was going to leap into the sea and swim
for my life, rather than continue among Yahoos. But one of
the seamen prevented me, and having informed the captain, I
was chained to my cabin.
After dinner, Don Pedro came to me, and desired to know
my reason for so desperate an attempt; assured me, "he only
meant to do me all the service he was able;" and spoke so very
movingly, that at last I descended to treat him like an animal
which had some little portion of reason. I gave him a very
short relation of my voyage; of the conspiracy against me by
my own inen; of the country where they set me on shore, and
of my five years' residence there: all which he looked upon as
if it were a dream or a vision; whereat I took great offence;
for I had quite forgot the faculty of lying, so peculiar to Yahoos
in all countries where they preside, and consequently, the dis-
position of suspecting truth in others of their own species. [
asked him, "whether it were the custom in his country to say
326
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
the thing which was not?" I assured him, "I had almost for
got what he meant by falsehood, and if I had lived a thousand
years in Houyhnhnmland, I should never have heard a lie from
the meanest servant; that I was altogether indifferent whether
he believed me or not; but however, in return for his favors, I
would give so much allowance to the corruption of his nature
as to answer any objections he might please to make, and then
he might easily discover the truth."
The captain, a wise man, after many endeavors to catch me
tripping in some part of my story, at last began to have a
better opinion of my veracity. But he added "that since I
professed so inviolable an attachment to truth, I must give him
my word and honor to bear him company in this voyage, with-
out attempting anything against my life; or else he would con-
tinue me a prisoner until we arrived at Lisbon." I
gave him
the promise required; but at the same time protested, "that I
would suffer the greatest hardships, rather than return to live
among Yahoos."
Our voyage passed without any considerable accident. In
gratitude to the captain, I sometimes sat with him at his earnest
request, and strove to conceal my antipathy against human-
kind, although it often broke out, which he suffered to pass
without observation. But the greatest part of the day I con-
fined myself to my cabin, to avoid seeing any of the crew.
The captain had often entreated me to strip myself of my
savage dress, and offered to lend me the best suit of clothes he
had. This I would not be prevailed on to accept, abhorring
to cover myself with anything that had been on the back of a
Yahoo; I only desired he would lend me two clean shirts,
which having been washed since he wore them, I believed
would not so much defile me. These I changed every second
day, and washed them myself.
We arrived at Lisbon, November 5th, 1715. At our land-
ing, the captain forced me to cover myself with his cloak, to
prevent the rabble from crowding about me. I was conveyed
to his own house; and at my earnest request he led me up to
the highest room backward. I conjured him " to conceal from
all persons what I had told him of the Houyhnhnms; because
the least hint of such a story would not only draw numbers of
people to see me, but probably put me in danger of being im-
prisoned, or burnt by the Inquisition." The captain persuaded
me to accept a suit of clothes newly made; but I would not
suffer the tailor to take my measure; however, Don Pedro
being almost of my size, they fitted me well enough. He ac
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
327
coutred me with other necessaries, all new, which I aired for
twenty-four hours before I would use them.
The captain had no wife, nor above three servants, none of
which were suffered to attend at meals; and his whole deport-
ment was so obliging, added to very good human understand-
ing, that I really began to tolerate his company. He gained
so far upon me, that I ventured to look out of the back win-
dow. By degrees I was brought into another room, whence I
peeped into the street, but drew my head back in a fright. In
a week's time he seduced me down to the door. I found my
terror gradually lessened, but my hatred and contempt seemed
to increase. I was at last bold enough to walk the street in
his company, but kept my nose well stopped with rue, and
sometimes with tobacco.
In ten days, Don Pedro, to whom I had given some account
of my domestic affairs, put it upon me, as a matter of honor
and conscience, " that I ought to return to my native country,
and live at home with my wife and children." He told me,
"there was an English ship in port just ready to sail, and he
would furnish me with all things necessary." It would be
tedious to repeat his arguments, and my contradictions. He
said, "it was altogether impossible to find such a solitary
island as I had desired to live in; but I might command in
my own house, and pass my time in a manner as recluse as I
pleased."
I complied at last, finding I could do no better. I left Lis-
bon the 24th day of November, in an English merchantman,
but who was the master I never inquired. Don Pedro accom-
panied me to the ship, and lent me twenty pounds. He took
kind leave of me, and embraced me at parting, which I bore as
well as I could. During this last voyage I had no commerce
with the master or any of his men; but pretending I was sick,
kept close in my cabin. On the 5th of December, 1715, we
cast anchor in the Downs, about nine in the morning, and at
three in the afternoon I got safe to my house at Redriff.
My wife and family received me with great surprise and
joy, because they concluded me certainly dead; but I must
freely confess the sight of them filled me only with hatred, dis-
gust, and contempt; and the more, by reflecting on the near
alliance I had to them. For although, since my unfortunate
exile from the Houyhnhnm country, I had compelled myself to
tolerate the sight of Yahoos, and to converse with Don Pedro
de Mendez, yet my memory and imagination were perpetually
filled with the virtues and ideas of those exalted Houyhnhnms.
328
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
And when I began to consider that, by copulating with one of
the Yahoo species I had become a parent of more, it struck me
with the utmost shame, confusion, and horror.
1
As soon as I entered the house, my wife took me in her
arms and kissed me; at which, having not been used to the
touch of that odious animal for so many years, I fell into a
swoon for almost an hour. At the time I am writing, it is five
years since my last return to England; during the first year, I'
could not endure my wife and children in my presence; the
very smell of them was intolerable; much less could I suffer
them to eat in the same room. To this hour they dare not
presume to touch my bread, or drink out of the same cup.
neither was I ever able to let one of them take me by the hand,
The first money I laid out was to buy two young stone-horses,
which I keep in a good stable; and next to them the groom is
my greatest favorite; for I feel my spirits revived by the smel
he contracts in the stable. My horses understand me tolera ·
bly well: I converse with them at least four hours every day,
They are strangers to bridle and saddle; they live in great
amity with me, and friendship to each other.
CHAPTER XII.)
1
THE AUTHOR'S VERACITY-HIS DESIGN IN PUBLISHING THIS
WORK HIS CENSURE OF THOSE TRAVELLERS WHO SWERVI
FROM THE TRUTH-THE AUTHOR CLEARS HIMSELF FROM
ANY SINISTER ENDS IN WRITING-AN OBJECTION AN
SWERED-THE METHOD OF PLANTING COLONIES-HIS NA、
TIVE COUNTRY COMMENDED-THE RIGHT OF THE CROWN
TO THOSE COUNTRIES DESCRIBED BY THE AUTHOR IS JUS
TIFIED THE DIFFICULTY OF CONQUERING THEM-THE AU-
THOR TAKES HIS LAST LEAVE OF THE READER; PROPOSES
HIS MANNER OF LIVING FOR THE FUTURE; GIVES GOOD
ADVICE, AND CONCLUDES.
1
AND thus gentle reader, I have given thee a faithful his
tory of my travels for sixteen years and about seven months}
wherein I have not been so studious of ornament as of truth.
I could perhaps, like others, have astonished thee with strange,
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
329
improbable tales; but I rather chose to relate plain matter of
fact, in the simplest manner and style; because my principal
design was to inform, and not to amuse thee,
→
It is easy for us to travel into remote countries, which are
weldom visited by Englishmen or other Europeans, to form
descriptions of wonderful animals both at sea and land.
Whereas a traveller's chief aim should be to make men wiser
and better, and to improve their minds by the bad, as well as
good example, of what they deliver concerning foreign places.
I could heartily wish a law was enacted, that every traveller,
before he were permitted to publish his voyages, should be
obliged to make oath before the Lord High Chancellor, that all
he intended to print was absolutely true to the best of his
knowledge; for then the world would no longer be deceived,
as it usually is, while some writers, to make their works pass the
better upon the public, impose the grossest falsities on the un-
wary reader. I have perused several books of travels with
great delight in my younger days; but having since gone over
most parts of the globe, and been able to contradict many fab-
ulous accounts from my own observation, it has given me a
great disgust against this part of reading, and some indigna-
tion to see the credulity of mankind so impudently abused.
Therefore, since my acquaintance were pleased to think my
poor endeavors might not be unacceptable to my country, I
imposed on myself as a maxim never to be swerved from, that
I would strictly adhere to truth; neither indeed can I be ever
under the least temptation to vary from it, while I retain in my
mind the lectures and example of my noble master and the
other illustrious Houyhnhnms of whom I had so long the honor
to be an humble hearer
-Nec si miserum Fortuna Sinonem
Finxit, vanum etiam, mendacemque improba finget.
I know very well, how little reputation is to be got by writ
ings, which require neither genius nor learning, nor indeed any
other talent except a good memory, or an exact journal. I
know likewise, that writers of travels, like dictionary-makers,
are sunk into oblivion by the weight and bulk of those who
come last, and therefore lie uppermost. As it is highly proba-
ble, that such travellers, who shall hereafter visit the countries
described in this work of mine, may, by detecting my errors
(if there be any), and adding many new discoveries of their
own, justle me out of vogue, and stand in my place, making
the world forget that ever I was an author. This indeed
330
GÜLLIVER'S TRAVELS.
would be too great a mortification, if I wrote for fame: but as
my sole intention was the public good, I cannot be altogether
disappointed. For who can read of the virtues I have men-
tioned in the glorious Houyhnhnms, without being ashamed of
his own vices, when he considers himself as the reasoning,
governing animal of his country? I shall say nothing of those
remote nations where Yahoos preside; among which the least
corrupted are the Brobdingnagians, whose wise maxims in mor
ality and government it would be our happiness to observe.
But I forbear descanting farther, and rather leave the judi-
cious reader to his own remarks and application.
I am not a little pleased, that this work of mine can pos-
sibly meet with no censurers; for what objections can be made
against a writer, who relates only plain facts, that happened in
such distant countries, where we have not the least interest,
with respect either to trade or negotiations? I have carefully
avoided every fault, with which common writers of travels are
often too justly charged. Besides, I meddle not the least with
any party, but write without passion, prejudice, or ill-will against
any man, or number of men whatsoever. I write for the noblest
end to inform and instruct mankind; over whom I may, with.
out breach of modesty, pretend to some superiority, from the
advantages I received by conversing so long among the most
accomplished Houyhnhnms. I write without any view to profit
or praise. I never suffer a word to pass that may look like
reflection, or possibly give the least offence, even to those who
are most ready to take it. So that I hope I may with justice
pronounce myself an author perfectly blameless; against whom
the tribes of Answerers, Considerers, Observers, Reflectors,
Detecters, Remarkers, will never be able to find matter for
exercising their talents.
I confess, it was whispered to me, "that I was bound in duty,
as a subject of England, to have given in a memorial to a
Secretary of State at my first coming over: because whatever
lands are discovered by a subject, belong to the crown."
But I doubt, whether our conquests, in the countries I treat of,
would be as easy as those of Ferdinando Cortez over the naked
Americans. The Lilliputians, I think, are hardly worth the
charge of a fleet and an army to reduce them; and I ques-
tion whether it might be prudent or safe to attempt the Brob-
dingnagians; or whether an English army would be much at
their ease, with the Flying Island over their heads. The
Houyhnhnms indeed appear not to be so well prepared for war,
a science to which they are perfect strangers, and especially
GULLIVERS TRAVELS)
332
against missive weapons. However, supposing myself to be
a minister of state, I could never give my advice for invading
them. Their prudence, unanimity, unacquaintedness with
fear, and their love of their country, would amply supply all
defects in the military art. Imagine twenty thousand of them
breaking into the midst of a European army, confounding the
ranks, overturning the carriages, battering the warriors' faces
into mummy by terrible yerks from their hinder hoofs; for
they would well deserve the character given to Augustus,
Recalcitrat undique tutus. But, instead of proposals for con-
quering that magnanimous nation, I rather wish they were in a
capacity, or disposition, to send a sufficient number of their in-
habitants for civilizing Europe, by teaching us the first prin-
ciples of honor, justice, truth, temperance, public spirit, forti-
tude, chastity, friendship, benevolence, and fidelity. The
names of all which virtues are still retained among us in most
languages, and are to be met with in modern, as well as an-
cient authors; which I am able to assert from my own small
reading.


But I had another reason, which made me less forward to
enlarge his majesty's dominions by my discoveries. To say
the truth, I had conceived a few scruples with relation to the
distributive justice of princes upon those occasions. For in-
stance, a crew of pirates are driven by a storm they know not
whither; at length a boy discovers land from the topmast;
they go on shore to rob and plunder they see a harmless peo-
ple; are entertained with kindness they give the country a
new name; they take formal possession of it for their king;
they set up a rotten plank, or stone, for a memorial; they mur-
der two or three dozen of the natives, bring away a couple
more, by force, for a sample; return home, and get their par
don. Here commences a new dominion, acquired with a title
by divine right. Ships are sent with the first opportunity; the
natives driven out or destroyed; their princes tortured to dis-
cover their gold; a free license given to all acts of inhumanity
and lust, the earth reeking with the blood of its inhabitants;
and this execrable crew of butchers, employed in so pious an
expedition, is a modern colony, sent to convert and civilize an
idolatrous and barbarous people.
1
But this description, I confess, does by no means affect the
British nation, who may be an example to the whole world for
their wisdom, care, and justice in planting colonies; their
liberal endowments for the advancement of religion and learn-
ing; their choice of devout and able pastors to propagate
Atte
332
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
Christianity; their caution in stocking their provinces with
people of sober lives and conversations from this the mother
kingdom; their strict regard to the distribution of justice, in
supplying the civil administration through all their colonies
with officers of the greatest abilities, utter strangers to corrup-
tion; and, to crown all, by sending the most vigilant and vir-
tuous governors, who have no other views than the happiness
of the people over whom they preside, and the honor of the
king their master.
But as those countries, which I have described, do not ap
pear to have any desire of being conquered and enslaved, mur
dered or driven out, by colonies; nor abound either in gold,
silver, sugar, or tobacco; I did humbly conceive, they were by
no means proper objects of our zeal, our valor, or our interest.
However, if those whom it more concerns think fit to be of an-
other opinion, I am ready to depose, when I shall be lawfully
called, that no European did ever visit those countries before
me. I mean, if the inhabitants ought to be believed, unless a
dispute may arise concerning the two Yahoos, said to have
been seen many years ago upon a mountain in Houyhnhnm
land.
But, as to the formality of taking possession in my sover
eign's name, it never came once into my thoughts; and if it
had, yet, as my affairs then stood, I should perhaps, in point
of prudence and self-preservation, have put it off to a better
opportunity.
Having thus answered the only objection that can ever be
raised against me as a traveller, I here take a final leave of all
my courteous readers, and return to enjoy my own speculations
in my little garden at Redriff; to apply those excellent lessons
of virtue, which I learned among the Houyhnhnms; to instruct
the Yahoos of my own family, as far as I shall find them doci
ble animals; to behold my figure often in a glass, and thus, if
possible, habituate myself by time to tolerate the sight of a
human creature; to lament the brutality of Houyhnhnms, in
my own country, but always treat their persons with respect,
for the sake of my noble master, his family, his friends, and
the whole Houyhnhnm race, whom these of ours have the honor
to resemble in all their lineaments, however their intellectuals
came to degenerate.
I began last week to permit my wife to sit at dinner with
me, at the farthest end of a long table; and to answer (but
with the utmost brevity) the few questions I asked her. Yet,
the smell of a Yahoo continuing very offensive, I always keep
GULLIVER'S TRAVELS.
333
my nose well stopped with rue, lavender, or tobacco leaves.
And although it be hard for a man late in life to remove old
habits, I am not altogether out of hopes, in some time, to suffer
a neighbor Yahoo in my company, without the apprehensions I
am yet under of his teeth or his claws.
My reconcilement to the Yahoo kind in general might not
be so difficult, if they would be content with those vices and
tollies only, which nature has entitled them to. I am not in
the least provoked at the sight of a lawyer, a pickpocket, a
colonel, a fool, a lord, a gamester, a politician, a whoremonger,
a physician, an evidence, a suborner, an attorney, a traitor, or
the like; this is all according to the due course of things:
but when I behold a lump of deformity and diseases, both in
body and mind, smitten with pride, it immediately breaks all
the measures of my patience; neither shall I be ever able to
comprehend how such an animal, and such a vice, could tally
logether. The wise and virtuous Houyhnhnms, who abound
in all the excellences that can adorn a rational creature, have
no name for this vice in their language; which has no terms
o express anything that is evil, except those whereby they
describe the detestable qualities of their Yahoos; among which
they were not able to distinguish this of pride for want of
horoughly understanding human nature, as it shows itself
n other countries where that animal presides. But I, who had
more experience, could plainly observe some rudiments of it
among the wild Yahoos.

But the Houyhnhnms, who live under the government of
reason, are no more proud of the good qualities they possess,
than I should be for not wanting a leg or an arm; which ne
man in his wits would boast of, although he must be miserable
without them. I dwell the longer upon this subject, from the
desire I have to make the society of an English Yahoo by any
means not insupportable; and therefore I here entreat those,
who have any tincture of this absurd vice, that they will not
presume to come in my sight.

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